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#starting my day stressed. great
howdyricciardo · 6 months
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here we goooo 🥲
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jestroer · 8 months
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Day two of @mcyt-yuri-week - Royalty/Knight! :D
Forbidenn romance between a fairy Queen and her Knight..... or something
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blueskittlesart · 1 year
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cold fruit in a hot kitchen (so i had this great watermelon last weekend)
#so I had this great watermelon last weekend. and the thing is it probably wasn't even that great of a watermelon#but I was four hours into an eight hour shift and we had thrown out all the watermelon salad because no one was eating it#and then our manager ran in and yelled that the client really fucking wanted watermelon salad.#so like six of us servers started frantically chopping watermelon. and the kitchen got really hot#in the way it does when everyone inside it is really stressed because there's no fucking watermelon salad#and after we chopped all the watermelon and the client got their fucking watermelon we all had a moment#where we looked at the remaining watermelon and we were so hot and cocktail hour was almost over anyway and the salads were all plated#and we all went for the watermelon and we ate it with the kind of rabid intensity you only get while eating cold watermelon in a hot kitche#and it was the best watermelon I have ever tasted and several days later i am still chasing the high of that fucking watermelon#and the thing is i know it isn't even the watermelon i'm actually missing#it's the feeling of cool liquid on hot skin and the feeling of a crisis averted and the feeling of camaraderie#that comes with devouring a watermelon in a hot kitchen with six other people who you have nothing in common with except that watermelon.#i don't dream of labor but i am dreaming now of being 4 hours into an eight hour shift eating watermelon in a hot kitchen.#i dream of laughing around the cold fruit in my mouth. I crave that watermelon like i'll die without it.#< honest to god this is real and that watermelon left such an impact on me that i had to draw it and write this. having a normal one#maybe this is insane but working in a team of people you truly like to do something you actually enjoy is so underrated#if only they fucking paid me i could work as a server for the rest of my life. unironically#skribbles
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slushiebrain · 8 months
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since i did traditional art last year and since i've started studying again and so have less free time, this year i'm doing pale gamkar week a little differently than my usual art (in the hopes it'll save me some time ; -- ;) i'm aiming for a little more cartoony and a whole lot sillier! i didn't have time to draw yesterday so today i'm posting both day 1 and day 2 of @pale-gamkar-week 2024 prompts: laughter and bath!
i might do full colours for these at some point but this is as good as it gets for now lol
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vaggieslefteye · 5 months
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HELL'S GREATEST DAD ↳ from Hazbin Hotel Season One (2024): 1x05 - "Dad Beat Dad"
#hazbin hotel#lucifer morningstar#hazbin lucifer#alastor#hazbin alastor#music vids: s1#dad beat dad#my videos#anyone else think the way he was holding alastor's head twice is foreshadowing? served it to her on a plate then had it as a pic on the cak#i hope it's foreshadowing lol#he was also feeding her his eyes and shadow tentacles as spaghetti and meatballs askjdfakjshdfjkls#bro was SO MAD LMFAO#song: hell's greatest dad#charlie#charlie morningstar#mimzy#hazbin mimzy#hey hey pssst... you know those 3 cards that swing by before the slot machine?#the middle one is lucifer as the king of spades - the same card alastor was in husk's overlord flashback.#DETAILS!! I LOVE THE DETAILS IN THIS SHOW!#RIP VID QUALITY BTW#tumblr really axed this one huh#also don't get me started on the symbolism behind alastor's whole deal in this song there is SO MUCH GOING ON#lucifer is overbearing yes but all his lyrics are ''im gonna help you cuz i love you'' meanwhile alastor's are ''IM SO GREAT AND COOL''#easy. but look at the doorway behind them when he dances with her on the stairs. it looks like spidery fingers reaching out from behind#to grasp/trap her in a dark place. THE ENTIRE ''ASSISTANCE'' PART#LITERALLY PUTTING ALL THAT STRESS ON HER THEN ''SAVES HER'' AFTER#THE ''IM YOUR GUY YOUR DAY TO DAY'' HE'S LITERALLY BOXING HER IN/TRAPPING HER WHILE PLAYING FRIENDLY#and do i even have to point out the obvious ''separating you from your blood family'' thing he has going on and the whole time#WATCH IT ELKMAN I WILL KILL YOU. YOU ARE LUCKY YOU'RE MODERATELY/MOSTLY ENTIRELY LIKEABLE AND FUNNY.
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souenkun · 3 months
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It's my birthday today, and I'm now as old as kita shinsuke in the timeskip! 🥳
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#wasn't sure if i wanted to celebrate here but KABU CAME HOME in my 4th multi pull and the world HAVE to know!!! ❤️‍🔥#legit shook my mom's shoulders in the middle of a jbbq spot because i didn't expect to pull him this early in a pokefair scout 😭💖#also! peek my hbslv photocards from 42yojin on the bird app 🤩💝 they came earlier this month and i gotta flex that here waughhhh 🥺🫶#anyway: here's to another year hoping that i can be somewhat healthy! i sure hope this month's medicine dosage works haha :')#and for whatever shitshow awaits me when i start school again in sept. nawt sure how i'm gonna wing it with my condition but 🤷‍♀️#that will be a problem i'll deal when i get there. thankfully i've been getting better at nawttt borrowing grief and anxiety from the futur#here's to hoping i can also live the ちゃんとやんえん way like kitasang does... i need have just half of his resilience to organize my life lmao 😭#but i'm grateful to have lived long enough to see the beauty in life 🥺🫶 met all kinds of amazing people and had tons of fun too!#also i went out today for ~3 hours 🥳🥂 my joints are sore as hell but i had fun + looked and felt pretty + bought a new jacket as my gift#most importantly KABU-SAN CAME HOME RRRRRAAAAHHHH ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥 燃えろおおおおおおお!!!!!#LAST WISH but here's to hoping my exhaustion + stress from may disappears soon 😭🤚 i miss writing and i think it's interfering my writing#i hope you all have a great day ahead!!! 🫂💖 and kabu + larry comes home soon if you pull for them!!! 🥺🍀#personal
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britneyshakespeare · 4 months
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screw whatever else i've said; the most important thing you can do in this lifetime is watch tv
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daandori · 8 months
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i am doing not great today lads
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g0thsoojin · 1 month
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kaus-quietis · 1 year
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A Circus Library - quick recommendations of short stories, poems, comics and novels I've recently read #1
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Hello there! I'm the circus resident poltergeist, Eliott, managing this blog until Lav comes back. Today I offer you a slightly different formula of my super awesome super rare super bookclub post, as Lav would say!
Hello hello hello! Is this a bookclub?! Is this chaotic ramble?! Ding ding! You got it wrong!
Writing full on reviews is tiedous and long, and while I appreciate doing it, I'm myself not always in the mood to read a long post explaining why a book is genius. Do I love that from time to time? Yes! Do I have the attention span to write one now? Nope! However, I still wanted to share some titles I recently (re)discovered, and that I think are marvellous reads for anyone wanting to dive into something new.
Here you'll find a few recommendations with the shortest of words to tell you why they are great, or just scream about it.
short disclaimer before I begin because this is tumblr and while I forgot a lot about this website, I remember how the TW thing works lol, it's at your own discretion to search for the works beforehand if you have any trigger you don't want to encounter.
Jack Spicer - Billy the kid
The master of my fate, captain of my soul as Timothée Chalamet would say idk I barely know the guy. Classic and gold, Spicer is an amazing writer and this poem is phenomenal. It's quite short and perfect if you want to know more about the wonder that was US American poetry during the 20th century. Of course I'd encourage you to read all of his works, but Billy the Kid is perfect to start somewhere.
Ryunosuke Akutagawa - Hell Screen
Classic and iconic, I've recently pushed further than Rashomon and boy oh boy am I never turning back. Hell Screen is a phenomenal short story displaying all the elegance and cruelty Akutagawa can incorporate in his works. It's mesmerizing, it aches, it's everything I love. I read this story in Jay Rubin's translation (Penguin Classics), and even though I do not speak Japanese so I cannot compare, I dare say it's a very good one.
Lucie Bryon, Thieves
I never recommended comic books before but I wanted to for a change! I am a huge comic book lover, but most of the ones I usually read are not available in english language. This one is, though. Thieves is a beautiful comic about growth, falling in love and finding acceptance in others and in yourself. It's light and heartwarming, like eating candy.
Ottessa Moshfegh, Lapvona
Now, this book exploits one of my biggest plot weaknesses ever, and that is fucked up people in medieval settings. Lapvona tells the story of Marek, a sheperd's son, who'll be caught in a series of unfortunate events, political struggles, and secrets, all inside the town of Lapvona. It's dark and unsettling, the characters are scandalous and horrible, yet sickeningly human. Now, I said to check the TW yourselves, but be very careful with this one, if you can think of a TW, then it's certainly in this book.
Osamu Dazai, Early Light
In the Storybook ND series, this book contains three short stories : Early Light, Three Hundred Views of Mount Fuji, and Villon’s Wife. I'd recommend the three of them, as it's a fantastic dive into Dazai's shorter works. I think that reading his short stories is very important to understand his work and the width of the subjects and stories he wrote about. It helps that once again, in my opinion, the translation chosen by this publishing house is so good.
This is it for today! Here you have five of the works I read (or re-read) this summer, and that I'd warmly recommend. There are two short stories (Dazai, Akutagawa), a comic book (Bryon), a novel (Moshfegh) and a poem (Spicer). 'Till next time!
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sea-buns · 2 months
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fuck colleges that dont give you the schedule info until literally the day before the semester starts
as someone who needs to know the start and end times, approx size, setting details, etc., WELL IN ADVANCE of every function i attend/activity i take part in just to keep myself from ripping my chest open i cannot comprehend how ppl can live SO last-minute
its not even just about a person living this way. how is it okay for an academic administration to run this way? did someone greenlight this and say yeah thats no big deal? or did we all collectively agree its insane and just no one has said anything?
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oceanmonsters · 3 months
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🤪.
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sweetdreamspootypie · 6 months
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*scream*
(ventpost)
"you know you're getting a bit old for meeting people if you want kids"
WHO'S FAULT IS THAT?!
Who chose to raise us in the middle of the the fucking woods?!
Who actively deliberately isolated us from our ethnic community because you were embarrassed by how we were failures and your internalized self racism makes you think all brown men as skeevy and you specifically wanted to keep us away from them and put effort into achieving that and cutting us off from all community connection?
Who let me switch to correspondence school and study alone at home because I said I was bored, instead of giving a single solitary fuck about me and noticing I was obviously depressed?
Who raised us abstinence only to the point that any mixing with the 'opposite' sex was unacceptable?
Who actively shut down any attempt I made to develop or act on hobbies or personal interests, because the only think I should be doing is studying?
Do you think that somehow the negative effects of keeping kids at home only allowed to do schoolwork and chores and unable to drive unable to leave the house unable to get a job unable to engage in hobbies unable to engage in community unable to leave the house... somehow the negative effects only apply if you're deliberately doing it for patriarchal cult reasons?
Bitch managed to raise us fully traditional entirely by accident
With a good dash of learned helplessness with constant messaging that were incapable of managing to do anything or survive by ourselves
I've only been out the house for 3 years! And 2 of that was the last year of the degree and the first year of the job being a new grad Covid nurse in peak Covid!
I've only been able to breathe for one year!
I've had one year of freedom and I've been using it to learn how to be human for the first time!
And you've spent that year telling me to break up with everyone I happen to meet!
Don't fucking tell me I'm too old now
You were supposed to help me!
You knew I wanted kids! Why didn't you help me earlier!
You did everything you could to keep me isolated because you were projecting your own trust issues onto me and never stopped to think what effect that might have when you're raising someone!
Why does generational trauma have to be so mundane
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herd-reject-arts · 1 year
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Here I go to spend several days by myself in the North Carolina wilderness. Wish me luck. Never gone camping alone (but I have my dogs, and I trust them more than any people I know), so that's intimidating. Hopefully I don't have to fistfight a bear over whatever I'm cooking that night. Not looking forward to no toilet or shower until Monday, but it is what it is. I absolutely have to do this, for my mental health. I'm losing so much money taking the time off work to just have mountain time to myself. But I gotta. My life has been such a chaotic mess for over half a year now - everything that could go wrong, has - and I've never felt so close to just letting myself snap. I can feel it boiling right under the surface at any given time.
But yeah. Should be a time. Might post pictures upon my return (provided a bear doesn't decide I'm on the menu). Wish me luck!
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featherymainffins · 3 months
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I think it's a hatecrime against me that there aren't any slugs as big as the giant African snail. Why do the snails get to have all the fun I just want a giant slime noodle.
#I don't want to keep a snail as a pet because theyre kinda prone to shell injuries#and then they die. id be in a constant state of stress#i can't have tarantulas even though i really want to for the same reason - spiders molt and they can actually fuck up#and they fuck up kinda frequently. and if they fuck up they die#because they either tear off their organs in an attempt to free themselves or they essentially turn themselves to stone#or they suffocate. i know that I'd be extremely stressed every da#id be like 'what if it happens what if they fuck up molting i have to stand here on guard in case they start molting and mess up'#because sometimes if you're really fucking lucky you CAN manage to save them. but you have to#be there on time and you have to pray. because its much easier for you to kill them than save them#and i would never forgive myself for that#in general it's very stressful for me to keep pets who don't have very clear signals of joy and displeasure/pain because i#constantly worry about possibly taking bad care of them and them being unhappy#i loved my hamster but i did breathe a breath of relief when she died of old age because every day with her was just#so unbelievably stressful for me. i wouldn't help but be preoccupied with trying to figure out if i was doing something incorrectly#if i was a bad foster parent to her if she was content etc etc#she was a great hamster but the experience was very much 0/10 for me i would never own a hamster again#in the same vein i probably couldn't have a tarantula due to this as well.#plus tbh I didn't even want a hamster my parents got her for me because they wanted me to feel obligated not to kill myself#they said that if i killed myself they wouldn't care for her and she'd die so i had to stay alive.#a part of me knew they were bullshitting but it still freaked me out super hard and made me unimaginably anxious about#getting run over or anything happening to me and paradoxically that made me even more suicidal and depressed#didn't help that my mother didn't even believe in her own plan and accused me of planning to kill myself AND my hamster#she accused me of that several times. I've always had a lot of intrusive thoughts about hurting animals so it#made me break down and self harm every time. obviously that made my mother even angrier and many a time it led to#her accusing me of being a danger to her and others#if she felt particularly hysterical she screamed i was just like my father and that she feared me as much as she had feared him#when he still had a gun. you can imagine how that made me feel considering i jsed to have nightly night terrors about my father#killing my mother.
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what-even-is-sleep · 4 months
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Trying to get ahead of an unsustainability cycle that might be starting up this week,,, (I start work).
#this turned into a bit of a rant whoops#mypost#have been chilling recovering from breast reduction the last month#steadily helping my mom out around the house more and more#but neow imma be working a ~35hr week (not including commute times during rush hour rip)#starting tmr#and I’m remembering that 1) it takes me more time to shower bc I have to be careful with boobz. also I have to wash my bra every night bc da#scars can’t get infected. so the whole process of showering is connected to also washing and drying my bra and putting on lotions n such so#it takes an hour minimum#2) doing stuff for my mom… is always spontaneous and urgent and takes up more time/energy than I think#3) my mom is bad at food stuff on a personal level and that’s transferring to the household bc a lot of stuff including a) she’s hella busy#and stressed. b) the price of food 💀keeps goin up ayoo. c) she is restricting herself to only eating twice a day??? idk why????#d) she also considers a meal to be anything she throws together no matter how unbalanced/nontasty it is#e) I’m also so bad at cooking/meal prep/etc but lowkey have a Thing abt food rn and cannot eat random junk even if I’m v hungry#. all this to say: idk how to do my household duties (communicating with mom. nightly dishes. small stuff that builds) when I have a feeling#imma be hella hungry this whole week.#WAIT I FORGOT THO IMMA BE MAKING MONEYYYY 💰 💴 💵 so I can pay for lunch at work ayooo#((not thinking abt budgeting atm lol 😬. I’m fortunate enough to have a 529 plan for college so semester times are all g)#4) I’m also doing two coursera courses atm (personal finance for young adults and Good With Words) …. I will prob not be able to get much#done in these courses when I have a full week rip#5) I gotta prepare for abroad (applying for visa. dealing with large government structures 😭😭😭) and in general attend to my emails#all dis. hmm#oh and also personal upkeep: gotta order eczema lotion. gotta get in contact with doctors abt leg and jaw PT. gotta follow thru with PT.#falling behind on a productive schedule while balancing my moms needs and my needs and my long-term health/personal project stuff is gonna#be difficult…#hm#writing this out is. hm.#all g all g I am a young adult I gotta handle this stuff now 🧑#great freedom = great responsibility and all that shiz#FUCK I FORGOT I HAVE TO EXERCISE TOO FUCK!!!! DANG NABBIT
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