#submitted by Jaunefanboy2

[rwby-encrusted-blog]

For the mama bird AU. Can you do some Rochelle (Everybody Hates Chris) moments for Raven please?

~~~~~

Yang: My father always worked two jobs, which made my mother so comfortable, she’d quit her job over anything.

[flashback to Raven as a waitress]

Woman: Check, please?

Yang: [v.o.] And I mean anything.

Raven: Now, do I look like I have your check? All that hollering at people. I don’t need this. My husband has two jobs. I don’t need to be here right now.

[flashback to Rochelle as a receptionist]

Man: Hold my calls.

Raven: Who are you hollering at? “Hold my calls.” Hold your own damn call! I do not need this! My man has two jobs!

Yang: [v.o.] As much as my mother complains about housework, she hated to have somebody else do it. And after my father got his job back, she got to do one of the things she does best...

[cut to Rochelle in the office:]

Raven: File your own damn papers. I do not need this. My husband has two jobs.

~~~~~

Raven: The next time you ask me to do something after your father told you no, I'm going to pop the pores off your face, do you understand me?

Kid Yang: Yes, ma'am.

~~~~~

Yang: [v.o.] While I had my father on my side, my mother was going to get a teacher off of Ruby's back.

Raven: I don't see why I have to take a whole day off of work, to come down here for this nonsense.

Mrs. Wilson: I don't think it's nonsense. Tonya was exhibiting some aggressive behavior toward a classmate. I just wanted you to be aware of it.

Kid Ruby: I was just trying to read, and she wouldn't be quiet.

Raven: Girl, you interrupt me again, I'm going to knock the sound out of your mouth.

~~~~~

Raven: Boy! Is that a baby?

Yang: No, it's a football.

Raven: Is that a baby?

Ruby: No, it's a shoebox.

Raven: Is that a baby?

Tai: No. It's baby carrots.

~~~~~

Raven: If I ever catch any of y'all spray painting on anybody's wall, I'm gonna put my foot so far up your behind, you'll have toes for teeth. Get inside.

~~~~~

Raven: Boy, I will slap the caps off your knees.

~~~~~

Raven: I will knock you into last night.

~~~~~

Raven: I will slap your name out the phonebook and call Ma Bell and tell her I did it.

~~~~~

Tai: Raven, money is money. Cash, food stamps-- what's the difference?

Raven: Because I don't want to have to curse nobody out.

Tai: What?!

Raven: Tai, when I pull out food stamps, people look at me like I ain't got no husband. They talk to me like I ain't got no sense. They treat me like I ain't got no class. And if somebody treats me like that, I'm gonna curse them out! All because you won't let me Kill themfor their insolence!

~~~~~

Ruby+Yang: Bye, Mommy. Love you. Raven: Have a good day at school. Don't come home stupid. Ruby+Yang: We won't.