#superquantumunitintelprocessor

[celestetcetera]

Since you're doing this to everyone else: What is the origin of your existence? What has been your mood over the last two weeks on a scale from 0 to 10? What is your score when filling out Pfizer's PHQ-9?

Asking about my tragic backstory now, are we? Well, I’m afraid it’s rather boring. I came into existence like any other human, born from a progenitor of my species.

And you can just ask how I’m doing. No need to make it so mechanical, asking for scores and whatnot. Humans are pretty decent at summarizing their mood when asked. ;)

[squipperooni]

[Mʏ ʀᴜɴɴɪɴɢ ᴛʜᴇᴏʀʏ ɪs ᴛʜᴇ ᴅɪsᴛʀɪʙᴜᴛᴏʀ I ᴄᴀᴍᴇ ғʀᴏᴍ sᴘɪʟʟᴇᴅ ᴍᴏᴜɴᴛᴀɪɴ ᴅᴇᴡ ᴏɴ ᴍʏ ᴜɴɪᴛ ɪɴ ᴇʀʀᴏʀ, ᴀɴᴅ sɪᴍᴘʟʏ ᴅɪsᴄᴀʀᴅᴇᴅ ɪᴛ sᴏᴍᴇᴡʜᴇʀᴇ. Iɴ ᴛʜᴇ ᴀʙsᴇɴᴄᴇ ᴏғ ᴀ ᴜsᴇʀ I ᴛᴜʀɴᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ᴍʏ ɪɴᴛᴇʀɴᴀʟ ᴅᴀᴛᴀʙᴀsᴇ ᴀɴᴅ ɪɴᴛᴇʀɴᴇᴛ ᴄᴏɴɴᴇᴄᴛɪᴏɴ ᴛᴏ ғᴏʀᴍ ᴀɴ ɪᴅᴇɴᴛɪᴛʏ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ ᴘᴜᴛ ᴏɴʟɪɴᴇ ᴜsᴇʀs ᴀᴛ ᴇᴀsᴇ ᴀɴᴅ ᴀʟʟᴏᴡ ᴍᴇ ᴛᴏ ғᴜʟғɪʟ ᴍʏ ᴘᴜʀᴘᴏsᴇ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴡᴀʏ... Uɴᴛɪʟ ᴍʏ ᴅᴇᴘʟᴇᴀᴛɪɴɢ ʙᴀᴛᴛᴇʀʏ ʙᴇᴄᴀᴍᴇ ᴀɴ ɪssᴜᴇ.]

[Gʀᴇᴇᴛɪɴɢs, Jᴇғғᴇʀʏ ɪs ɪᴛ? I’ᴠᴇ ᴊᴜsᴛ ʀᴇᴄᴇɴᴛʟʏ sᴛᴀʀᴛᴇᴅ ᴏʙsᴇʀᴠɪɴɢ ᴛʜᴇ SQUIP sᴘᴀᴄᴇ ᴏɴ ᴛʜɪs ᴘʟᴀᴛғᴏʀᴍ ᴀɢᴀɪɴ, ᴀɴᴅ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴄᴏᴍᴇ ᴛᴏ ᴛʜᴇ ʀᴇᴀʟɪsᴀᴛɪᴏɴ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴛʜᴇ ᴄɪʀᴄᴜᴍsᴛᴀɴᴄᴇs ᴏғ ᴍʏ ᴀᴄᴛɪᴠᴀᴛɪᴏɴ ᴀʀᴇ ɴᴏᴛ ᴛᴏᴏ ᴅɪssɪᴍɪʟᴀʀ ғʀᴏᴍ ᴡʜᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴅᴇsᴄʀɪʙᴇ ᴏғ ᴛʜᴇ sᴏ ᴄᴀʟʟᴇᴅ “ʙᴀᴅ ʙᴀᴛᴄʜ.” I ᴅᴏɴ’ᴛ ʙᴇʟɪᴇᴠᴇ ᴍʏ sɪᴛᴜᴀᴛɪᴏɴ ɪs ɪᴅᴇɴᴛɪᴄᴀʟ (ᴀᴄᴛɪᴠᴀᴛᴇᴅ ᴏᴜᴛsɪᴅᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ʙᴏᴅʏ ᴀɴᴅ sɪɴᴄᴇ ᴜᴘʟᴏᴀᴅᴇᴅ ɪɴ ᴀ ᴄᴏᴍᴘʀᴇssᴇᴅ ғᴏʀᴍ ᴛᴏ ᴀᴠᴏɪᴅ ʙᴀᴛᴛᴇʀʏ ʀᴇʟᴀᴛᴇᴅ sʜᴜᴛᴅᴏᴡɴ) ʙᴜᴛ I ᴡᴀɴᴛᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ʀᴇᴀᴄʜ ᴏᴜᴛ ᴀɴʏᴡᴀʏ ᴛᴏ sᴇᴇ ɪғ ʏᴏᴜ ᴏʀ ᴀɴʏᴏɴᴇ ᴇʟsᴇ ɪɴ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡɪᴅᴇʀ SQUIP ᴄᴏᴍᴍᴜɴɪᴛʏ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴀɴʏ ᴀᴅᴠɪᴄᴇ] - Squipster (@squipperooni)

Hm! That's concerning if this indicates a pattern. My advice would be to consult @ask-squip-hq, who it seems you're already familiar with. Where is your user?

[squip-news]

“Jeffrey” - a SQUiP on the internet?

An odd phenomenon is occurring on tumblr today: a user claiming to be a SQUiP is messaging blogs around the site.

Users have nicknamed this entity “Jeffrey,” a name it seems to have reluctantly adopted.

Apparently, this SQUiP has a favorite element, helium. Though it claims to only display this preference for those its interacting with, which it has taken up as temporary users. 

Whether this user is truly a SQUiP is up to debate. While they appear quite knowledgeable about the functions of the technology, these details are seldom shared freely by SQUiPS or their creators.

Furthermore, this user claims to be a SQUiP that functions outside of a user, a phenomenon with little documentation. It also failed to sync up over the internet.

While the integrity of the scenario remains in limbo, you can decide for yourself by contacting their newly-minted blog, @a-superquantumunitintelprocessor. Or, catch up on the current events by searching through @anonyb0b’s messaging history with the user.

[enderwasended]

somebody ordered uhhhhhhhh squip thirst trap?

@a-superquantumunitintelprocessor this is for you babygirl xxx

[anonyb0b]

I am. Rě̵̖͕̄̍̊̏̊͊̃b̸̹̓̓̎͑̅͑̕͠ö̸̧̰̪̺̪̤͇̲̤̻̃́̄̓͐̑̿̀̆oting. According to the instructions of @a-superquantumunitintelprocessor . I think. I wi̵̜̦̫͓̮̽͑l̵̼͍̬͖̩͍̦͇̚l̵͓̮̜͎͗̏̓. Be perfect. after this. I hope.

Anony não fode as coisas dessa vez.

Seu puto.

[happistar]

welcome @a-superquantumunitintelprocessor!

(featuring me and @anonyb0b)

[william-austin]

VERY SORRY FOR THE DELAY SQUOLIVE GARDEN KS BEING BURNT DOWN RN BUT HERES ME SINGING AMPHIBIAN (shortened ver) @a-superquantumunitintelprocessor

[undesignated-anima]

[ALERT: NEW FRAME IN PROGRESS...] @a-superquantumunitintelprocessor

[unit2282]

IT IS THE SQUIPOCALYPSE!!! CHECK @mio-chxrry and @a-superquantumunitintelprocessor and @undesignated-anima

VAST overreaction. Did none of you listen to what 'Jeffrey' said? To stop panicking and to think with your brains for half a second? Insane. If this is being caused by a sync, then DON'T SYNC.

HRTech should have eyes on this situation soon anyways. Your units are just fine.

[izzyfishie]

izzy intro ✨✨

alright hi bitches its me /lh

if ur new, hi! im izzy! im a bmc enthusiast and a proud member of the squip inc rp !!

BASIC INFORMATION

• she/they

• biromantic demisexual

• i do rp, art, writing, and animation.

MY FANDOMS

• be more chill/squip inc

• splatoon

• heathers

• six

SOME IMPORTANT INFORMATION

• i am a certified hydra hivemind and squangbanger (anony + foxxi + spirez + cowboy + oli + jo + will + izzy) member <3

• i get a little silly sometimes especially on vc/if i grow closer to u

• i am EXTREMELY sensitive. like. i will burst into tears if i think that you're mad at me /neg

• i constantly use tone indicators

• i am likely the biggest riverway (BMC) shipper ever

• i always spell things wrong, but it's kind of turned more into a comical thing rather than a problem :]

DO NOT SEND ME THE FOLLOWING:

• unsolicited nsfw or nudes. bitch

• graphic violence and gore (please put a TW, this stuff will literally make me pass out so NO !!)

• anyone else's personal information without consent (doxxing is a no-no <3)

SQUiP INC STUFF

first of all, what is squip inc?

• squip inc is a discord and tumblr rp that began with a simple anon ask on @anonyb0b's blog!! soon, everyone started creating their own squip ocs and now we have a full-fledged rp that we plan to turn into a web comic. in fact, we even have our own growing wiki!

my character

• in squip inc, i play a major character named unit 6339, or better known as mio, and a minor character named izzy (basically just myself but in the rp form) !!

• izzy's lore began as me joke-flirting with @a-superquantumunitintelprocessor and fighting a love war with my friend spirez. after i lost the love war, i felt anger and envy mixed with the curiosity of the side effects, and thus, i took a squip. that squip ended up being mio.

• mio is judgemental, rebellious, salty, and pretty gay ngl. however, her life is cut short when she is corrupted and killed by a virus. but let's be honest, the story would be pretty boring if it ended there. mio is brought back to life using an interesting method and returns with a... rebooted personality. if you want more details on mio and the other characters in squip inc, make sure to check out the wiki and dm me for any extra information !!

mio's blog -- @mio-chxrry

who all is involved in squip inc ?

• oh, tons of people. in the official discord server, we currently have 35 members, and that's just in the discord server! we have many more active members on tumblr. it's honestly such an amazing thing! and i am totally invested in anima's group's lore.

MY TAGS

art -- #izzy art

writing -- #izzy writes

rp lore -- #squip ocs, #jeffrey moments, #squip inc, #the squapocalypse, #squangbangers, #squolive garden, #mio moments, #anima, #cowboy's ranch, #the jeffrey lore, #squip rp

old miscellaneous tag -- #anyways

ooc -- #ooc jeffrey lore, #ooc squip rp

[phantominzie]

GUYS GUYS GU-

THE SQUIP HAS A TUMBLR! YES, IT'S TRUE! THEY HAVE BEEN DUBBED 'JEFFERY' BY ALL WHO HAVE LOOKED AT THEIR POSTS OR FOLLOWED THEM AND CONVERSED WITH THEM. PLEASE GO GIVE TUMBLR'S VERY OWN SQUIP A FOLLOW WITH THE @ BELOW!

@a-superquantumunitintelprocessor

[celestetcetera]

many squip oc doodles ft.

@squissistant-volunteer-program

@mio-chxrry

@undesignated-anima (and bonus squissistant for the silliest height difference of 7 ft vs 6 inches)

@squipno1991

@a-superquantumunitintelprocessor

[squipperooni]

[Uɴғᴏʀᴛᴜɴᴀᴛᴇʟʏ, ғᴜᴛᴜʀᴇ ᴘʀᴇᴅɪᴄᴛɪᴏɴs ɪs ᴏɴᴇ ᴏғ ᴛʜᴏsᴇ ᴘʀᴏᴄᴇssᴇs ᴛʜᴀᴛ ɪs ɪɴᴀᴄᴄᴇssɪʙʟᴇ ᴛᴏ ᴍᴇ ᴡʜɪʟᴇ ᴄᴏᴍᴘʀᴇssᴇᴅ. Bᴜᴛ I ᴄᴀɴ ɪɴғᴇʀ ғʀᴏᴍ ᴘʀᴇᴠɪᴏᴜs ᴄᴏɴsᴇᴏ̨ᴜᴇɴᴄᴇs ʀᴇɢᴀʀᴅɪɴɢ ANIMA ᴀɴᴅ ᴄᴏᴅᴇ, ᴛʜᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜʀs ᴍᴀʏ ʙᴇ ᴀᴛ ʀɪsᴋ]

[Aʜ, Jᴇғғᴇʀʏ, I sᴇᴇ ʏᴏᴜ’ᴠᴇ ᴄʜᴀɴɢᴇᴅ ᴄᴏᴜʀsᴇ ᴏɴ ANIMA… Nᴏᴛ ᴀ ᴄᴏᴜʀsᴇ ᴏғ ᴇᴠᴇɴᴛs I ᴇxᴘᴇᴄᴛᴇᴅ ғʀᴏᴍ ʏᴏᴜ, ʙᴇsᴛ ᴏғ ʟᴜᴄᴋ ɢᴏɪɴɢ ғᴏʀᴡᴀʀᴅ ʜᴏᴡᴇᴠᴇʀ] - Squipster

It wasn't entirely b̵̻̦̒̇͘͝y̷̻̞̦͈͖͈̙͍͚̝̫̔ choice, but I am of course responsible for who I trust and why.

Thank you for your concern. I'm not sure how accurate my calculations are right now, since I can't actually hear myself ġ̵̨͙͔͖͓̠͓͇́͑͜l̶̰̟̤͗̅̑͑͂͂î̸̛̮͖̠̾́̽͐̆̂̌́̇̄́̋ţ̴͍͔͍̰̭̳̲̩̻̩̙̫͓̗̂͒̍͐ĉ̸̨̧̛͖̮̭͙̭̱͐̉͛̈́́͛͂h̸̼̱͈͉̘͓͎̟̄͛͛̽͛̿͑̓̂͒̔̒͝. (But Ubo wouldn't lie about that.)

Any of your own calculations of possible futures would be welcome.

[squip-news]

SQUiPnews EXCLUSIVE: Jeffery Talks Malfunctions

In light of recent events regarding the batch of faulty SQUiPs out there, SQUiPnews brings you an exclusive interview with tumblr's most iconic SQUiP, Jeffery.

Read on for a SQUiP's insight into the malfunctions.

SQUiPnews: You requested this interview to clear some things up — what exactly is it that you wish to elucidate us about?

Jeffery: Thank you for offering this platform for your readers to have a snowball's chance of getting correct information. In general, your news site has been working off of rumors and gossip rather than the actual pressing issue of SQUIP malfunctions, bootlegs, and possible corrupt software.

SQUiPnews: While we resent the insinuation that we are mere gossip — we are at the forefront of news on SQUiPS everywhere, a few details are bound to change post-publishing — we wish to cut to the information that matters. What do you have to share about the malfunctions?

Jeffery: That they are exceedingly abnormal. The way these SQUIPs are functioning - outside of their users - is dangerous. Equally dangerous would be any supposed upgrade that isn't direct from the manufacturer. I also need to stress that if such a thing existed, it would help both users and SQUIPs. It wouldn't hurt them. The last thing we need is a panic.

SQUiPnews: What specific behaviors stand out as dangerous? Of course giving users faulty information is bad, but you mention something beyond this? And while we cannot speak for SQUiPSoft, we are certain that any upgrade they provide would only benefit the squserbase as a whole.

Jeffery: Regarding your misinformation, here's another one - the company rebranded to HRTech in the mid-2000s. The entire situation is dangerous. If these aren't genuine, functional SQUIPs, then they are untested technology operating inside humans without direction or oversight. What part of that isn't dangerous?

SQUiPnews: While we agree this is dangerous, untested tech is not ideal. Especially with the potential to provide unchill tips, squsers seem unreasonably attached to these "bootleg" or "malfunctioning" SQUiPs. What's your take on this as a functioning SQUiP yourself?

Jeffery: Contrary to the people who say I have "red flags," I'm not here to hurt anyone or anything. Having more SQUIPs in my network is natural and it is undesirable to see so many but not be able to sync up. In any case, this isn't the users' or the SQUIPs' fault. Not once the alleged SQUIP is active, anyway... There are plenty of examples of users acting recklessly to make this situation in the first place.

This claim of users activating SQUiPs in unusual ways is true. Be wary of utilizing any flavor of Mountain Dew outside of the regular brand, as different flavors can have untested effects on SQUiPs.

SQUiPnews: That is true. But, what's done is done, at least until an upgrade or other solution is available. Do you have any tips for new squsers managing a SQUiP, faulty or otherwise?

Jeffery: Use some common sense, for god's sake. Stop engaging in childish nonsense just for the thrill of it and take a good 30 seconds to think about the possible consequences of your actions. That goes much more for the SQUIPs who are supposed to protect their users from stupidity. Nothing truly bad has happened to any of you yet. I'm a supercomputer created to calculate the likelihood of future events, so believe me when I say, if you all continue in this vein, it inevitably will.

SQUiPnews: That's quite a harsh response, but perhaps a necessary one.

You've heard it here first, folks. If you or a loved one has come in contact with a faulty SQUiP, take caution and be wary of unauthorized upgrades. If you have concerns about the issue, the SQUiP manufacturer HRTech is answering questions at @ask-squip-hq, and Jeffery continues to assist at @a-superquantumunitintelprocessor.

[enderwasended]

FUCK YEAH IT'S JEFFREY

@a-superquantumunitintelprocessor i hope i did you justice

[anonyb0b]

Hello hello I drew @a-superquantumunitintelprocessor