#tad the lost explorer 6

[paulinawoodpecker]

Dagenia fan art

@jakkiisthatboy2

[occasionallyprosie]

"Too Much Like Hell"

Link was more well-acquainted with death than anyone else, and it was not because he witnessed it so many times. It was because he experienced it more than any other and he still came back.

Febuwhump 2024 | Alt Prompt 6: Immortality

Read on AO3 Warnings: None (Barely even counts as angst tbh...)

He had been eight and wielding his uncle's blade naturally. He had been trained since he could walk to be a warrior after all. It didn't matter much against the lynels on Death Mountain though, he still was burned alive.

He had been twelve and drained of all life by Onyx. Din had nothing to do with his survival.

He had been fifteen when he drowned.

That was the last time he died.

He was nineteen when he met the heroes of past, adjacent, and future, and he was twenty when he said his goodbyes to them and went back to his era.

He had lost track of his age when he saw them again.

"Hey! Pikango!"

He looked over and saw a large group of warriors--men and boys--approaching his vantage point, one waving at him.

"Ah, Link," he slid his paintbrush behind his ear, "welcome back to Hyrule."

"Back--I'm not even asking how you know," Link laughed.

"Who's this, Champion?" Asked one of the men.

"Oh--This is Pikango, an artist from Kakariko. He's a great artist, better than the vet even!"

"Oh," one of the boys breathed.

'Pikango' met the boy's eyes and he just smiled.

As the heroes chattered and moved to go on, Link waving back at 'Pikango' as they did, the hero in red lingered.

"So old age isn't an option?" He asked. There was a ripple around the other and there stood what had to be a copy of the hero, only in traditional Sheikah garb.

"No," the Sheikah said.

"Goddesses." The Hero of Legend looked exhausted as he raised his eyes to the bright sky. "Why? I don’t want to be immortal."

The Kakariko painter just smiled. "Nobody does. It's a far more terrible fate than any I've seen before… and there is a certain point when they will deem your journey as finished but you'll still be here… just to watch the world go by."

"That sounds like hell."

"It is, in a way, but we're always meeting new people, making new friends, and exploring new lands."

"And watching them die, losing them, and seeing it be destroyed?"

"More often than I'd prefer. Once, Ganondorf came back, and there was no hero. I tried to step up, but they were clear." Two sets of crimson eyes met again. "I'm a story now, little more than a legend, but so long as that story is told I remain and so will you."

"Hey Veteran!" One of the other heroes called back. "Leave the elder alone!"

"Jump off a bridge, Captain!" the hero yelled back. He turned back to the painter. "No rest for the wicked then?"

The painter chuckled. "I'd say that the idiom 'Legends never die' is a tad more accurate."

He hummed, then looked back at the other heroes. "Do you want to talk to them? Drop the illusion?"

"I'll be alright." A ripple accompanied him retaking the form of a Sheikah elder. "It was good enough just to see them again."

The hero nodded before jogging after the group.

"What was that, collector?" Wild asked.

Legend shook his head. "Nothing. Just seeing if art changed over history, Nayru knows I can't talk to any of you about that."

Wild laughed. "Fair enough. Pikango is the best artist in all of Hyrule, no offense. He just is."

"If you say so," Legend hummed.

He glanced back and saw an old wolf joining the painter at the setting sun. The painter pet the old wolf and continued painting the sunset behind Satori Mountain.

"Hey Rancher," he called forward and Twilight looked back. "What's your thoughts on immortality? A blessing or a curse?"

The topic drew the attention of the group, confusing Twilight as well, but he thought about it.

"I don' think I'd like t'a outlive everyone," the rancher decided. "It sounds like an awful thing, t'be honest wit'ya, Vet."

"But you'd live forever!" Wind argued. "What if someday there were ships that could fly without magic?"

"Doubt it," Hyrule teased.

Legend looked up at the colorful sky and could see one of Wild's dragons flying overhead, the electric one. "I agree," he said, partially to Twilight, partially to all of them, and partially to the goddesses who made him. "It sounds just a little too much like hell."

Event Masterlist

[thelovelyghostwriter]

Answers are below:

AO3 Handle

This is easy. Numbkid.

It has been a pen-name since I was a kid. I was an emo kid who liked Linkin Park's Numb.

2. Ships I write

Currently, mostly Kuraneon. Occassionally there are other HxH pairings like Hisomachi, Tserriednich/Theta, Chrollo/Neon and Ponzu/Pokkle.

3. Ships I read

Pretty much anything I get curious about.

4. When i started writing

11 years old. That was more than a decade ago, even before AO3 was founded.

5. First fic I wrote

I did write something when I was 11 on FF.net. I did delete it because of the poor language use and the fact that it was cringe.

I did remember the title, it was "Can I heal your broken heart" which was a CoAi fanfic.

6. Favourite fic I wrote

There are a lot that I have written over the years. Just to name a few:

I like writing angst, so this is probably the most painful one. Also the longest one-chapter fic I have ever written (13K words).

I think this is my favourite Hisomachi fic. I really enjoyed writing them in a whimsical fantasy setting. It was also pure comedy and fluff.

My very first Tserriednich/Theta central fic, with Hisomachi and Kuraneon pairings as well. I had fun writing Tserriednich in a very psychological thriller type of way.

I loved writing Kuraneon hate-sex. There was something raw and hot about this.

7. Hardest fic I wrote

There were a few fics that were written with much difficulty, for various reasons.

The longest, completed fic I have ever written. It was difficult because half-way because I lost interest in Detective Conan as a series. I have always liked the CoAi pairing, but grew frustrated with how the series was going. Add on to my depression in the 2014-2016 era (this was written from 2015-2018) + adolescent teen angst + readers pressuring me to continue, and you get a recipe for disaster. Incredibly difficult for me to write given the circumstances. I also didn't think it was good and there were people complaining on Wattpad so I thought the efforts were in vain. I was so frustrated that I vowed never to write for this series ever again. Don't know if I'm gonna hold up to that promise but it has been 6 years, so I'm not sure if I'll love this series enough to write for it again. Maybe a one-shot, who knows.

8. Most research-intensive fic I wrote

This one is very obvious. The amount of stuff I had to learn to write how the mafia works in HxH and also how Nen works. Also the HxH world building. Whew. Very heavy stuff. It is paying off though.

9. Fic that is most dear to me

I am going with the first fanfic I have ever discovered.

This fic was first written in 2005, I discovered it just a tad a few years later. I was mindblown by the fact that people could just write about established characters and make up scenarios, lmao. It fulfilled my shipper desires that Conan and Ai would get together! Somehow after like a while, it inspired me to write my own fics. So this was the start of everything.

10. Favourite trope to write

I don't know, I don't really have a trope. There are common things I liked exploring:

Mafia theme

Greed and money

Desires and Death

Sexual temptation

Psychological thriller

Occassionally I do write the happier fics and I think I can pull it off, but that's not where my interests lie.

11. Something I wouldn't write

Hmm... I don't have boundaries, I think? I love exploring different genres, themes and even the most messed up situations. I like dark fics, I do want to write thrillers.

Probably just fics about real people. Like those celebrity fics, like those "my mom sold me to One Direction" or something. It's just weird writing about real people for me.

I also don't really do requests anymore. I would hate to write a ship that I wasn't 100% on board with.

12. Favourite scene I ever wrote

Hmm, this is quite tough. Probably the part where Theta reads a letter from Tserriednich in "Like Turkeys Voting for Christmas".

Dear Theta,  The newspapers told me about your tremendous error that led to the chaos during Sara’s winter concert - how an exhilarating event had burst into madness. Pity poor Sara though. Once was a bright star among the upper echelons, had fallen so gracefully in a blink of an eye. I fantasise that you wonder before going to bed if that error was an unfortunate anomaly, or had been stuck to you like an inherent gene. Like Sara, millions of individuals undergo their life like an inverted curve - the struggle to go up and then come rolling down the hills. Do you find it humiliating that you, once a trustworthy royal head bodyguard, had been demoted to a security for a talentless celebrity rumoured to had fucked her way up to the top in Hollywood? And more so that even in this meagre position, you had failed? Do you believe that failing your career in protecting your client, would be equivalent to having failed to save the inner child wailing deep within yourself?   I would reassure you, my dear Theta, that you are competent. A fine specimen of the female human species. Which is why I had no doubt of choosing you to watch my back. It is unfortunate however, that you chose to stab it. Why would you do that, my dear Theta? We were having so much fun - our intimate bantering had been forever etched to my memories.  I had often backtracked at which pinnacle moment my behaviour became intolerant for you: you had always turned the other cheek whenever a new collection of mine was delivered; and the personal matters of my fucked up royal family had been more or less familiar with you. The screams of women getting out of their shells never fazed you either. Somehow, you believe that me unlocking the powers of Nen would be a Pandora’s box; and that was where you drew the line. But really, who are you to deny me my potential? That is the riddle that has perplexed me. The temptation to open your mind and pick on the neurons for an answer is too high, but I digress.  Needless to say, an utter disappointment when you decided to take the role of Delilah, attempting to defeat the lion that she feared would devour the world.  Has it ever occurred to you that your role in the narrative would not be against me, but besides me? Did you fear that I would have disposed of you after learning Nen from you, dispose of you like the poor trash that you think you are? If that is so, you have greatly underestimated my generosity.  With my sibling, the self-proclaimed winner, had met the untimely death, the Kakin throne had been left vacant. I think it's time for me not only to rule, but my bloodline for eternity. Join me, Theta, this is my offer to you.  Since this time of the year is to celebrate generosity, companionship and forgiveness, I propose both of us do the same. Allow me to show my generosity by giving you something that few had done: justice. The King might be the most important piece, but the Queen is his most prized protector. Once somebody has offended you, they have done the same to me.  You spent Christmas by yourself last year. I will be sure that this year will be different. Until then, please enjoy the gift I have sent you. Some animals really need to keep their hands to themselves.   - Prince Tserriednich Hui Guo Rou 

Then she finds a severed hand inside the gift box sent to her. The hand belonged to a man that tried to molest her earlier in the fic.

13. Where I get inspiration from

Pretty much anything, depending on the topic. Sometimes I just go like "hey I got an idea!"

14. Hardest scene I ever wrote

So far the argument between Kurapika and Neon in the latest chapter Glam Gas Land in Strange Bedfellows. I wanted to write an argument where both of them had a valid point.

15. Favourite characterisation I wrote

Always Kurapika. He is SO fun to explore. I love writing him a good ol' angst scene. I think the angstiest I have him in is "The Rabbit Died".

16. Sequel I would write, if I had the time

There are two.

One was the "Neon Nostrade is a Pop Star/Idol AU". I wrote "In Star-struck Awe". The sequel was supposed to be this:

I only wrote the first chapter. But this sequel was supposed to be the story where the media finds out that Kurapika and Neon are dating. I plan to make changes to both fics and set it to the 2000s. I want to make references to the 2000s music industry scene, mixing up Neon's Pop Idol character with Britney Spears, Paris Hilton etc. The 2000s were also very brutal to famous female celebrities, so it will be a fun fic project.

Another sequel I planned to write was from "Black Veil". I have not posted the fic sequel yet, but I plan to expand from this. Since in Black Veil, Kurapika finds an alternate universe where he got married to Neon and had kids, with the Kurta clan still alive. Since he got back to his own world, he explains that Neon is actually in the ICU where nothing can wake her up. There is a plant in the Dark Continent to cure all diseases. So I want to write a sequel on that.

17. Story I wanna write, but don't think people will enjoy reading

I think just really dark fics. For Kuraneon, I kind of wanna write another dark fic with the tag "infanticide". Go figure.

I also am tempted to write a Gin/Sherry fic. I don't know, I think this ship is dark and interesting.

18. A line from a WIP

"Kurapika had enquired to one of the townsfolk for The Owl's location"

19. A recent comment that made you smile

Pretty much any comments from @anotherworldash ! She has very long comments that made me smile so much!

20. A discontinued work that I would have loved to finish

There are two.

Of Marigolds and Dragonflies.

This fic was a Hiei/Botan fic that I have abandoned. I made the mistake of having to post more chapters, when it could be a standalone one-shot fic. It begins after 1 year of death anniversary of Hiei and Botan's unborn child, and they have broken up over it.

I actually had a good vision for this fic, but I kinda moved onto another fandom. Perhaps I can just post the first chapter of the fic, I think this is a good standalone.

The Outsiders.

The other fic is this one. It's a crossover fic between Detective Conan and Tokyo Ghoul.

I had this idea of Conan being a detective and going around to solve ghoul-related cases. But alas, I kind of got tired of Detective Conan; so I dropped it. Once in a while I see CoAi content for my own amusement, but I'm sort of done writing for it. Don't know if I'll pick up this idea again.

21. Fic writers I admire

I think I admired a few of them back when FFnet was still the norm, but they stopped working on fanfics.

22. A story I recommend

After Hours by Cb_w.

A story by @anotherworldash

A Vampire AU where Neon is a vampire and Kurapika is a vampire hunter.

The Sleeping Beauty in the Bathtub by Cb_w.

Definitely one of my fave darker Kuraneon stories.

[queenofsimpsblog]

believe me - shuri x reader pt 2

HCEWUGCFYUEWG so my dumbass accidentally deleted the 2nd draft, so i had to rewrite this bad boy MULTIPLE TIMES to make it absolutely perfect for you guys, cuz everyone loved pt 1 so much i just knew i had to make pt 2 as perfect as possible WARNINGS: mentions of drowning, fight scenes, gets a little graphic towards the end, pure fluff ending here are all the accounts that asked for a pt 2 (sorry if i missed a few): @shurislover @taiiunknown @sinsikoxo @mysticalmarss @lilroachsworld @angelsmist @ogbells16 @youralphawolf72 @6-noir @awolfcsworld @adeola-the-explorer @shuriszn @kya-rose @minionslikeppl @anonassbjtch @miguenza @dovesbeauty @yamsthoughts @k3nn3dyxo honorary mention to @locoforshuri WHO HAS IGNORED ME FOR SO LONG SMH LIKE BITCH ARE YOU ALIVE?! ARE YOU DEAD?! HOW THE FUCK AM I SUPPOSED TO KNOW IF YOU IGNORE ME LIL SHIT?! YOU GOT OTHER HOES OR SMTH?! I THOUGHT WE HAD SMTH SPECIAL ok i'm done with my lil rage outburst, y'all have fun reading this <3

"what the hell do you think you're doing?!"

*20 minutes ago*

"oh please. you're just jealous that i love maya and not you," shuri spat out. you were too upset to deal with the way her comment stung your heart, so you chugged the remainder of your drink and left the booth.

shuri shut her eyes and sighed in annoyance. she regretted her words the instant they left her mouth. she wanted to get up and look for you, but your body was lost in the dancing crowd.

she downed her scotch, still feeling thirsty. shuri was feeling out of sync the entire day. she felt parched, hungry, nauseous, irritated. it wasn't her period, no. it was something else.

she stayed at her seat, drinking shot after shot. one of the downsides to being the black panther was an incredibly fast metabolic rate. in layman terms, she couldn't get drunk that easily.

she stayed at her seat, staring at her hands. thinking of you. missing you. feeling guilty for what she said.

just then, her kimoyo beads buzzed. an SOS message from you. the alcohol instantly evaporated as she saw the alert. shuri got up from her seat, using her panther vision to locate riri at the bar, talking to the waitress who flirted with her earlier.

***

(lil smth for the fight scene)

"what the hell do you think you're doing?!"

you turned from your seat to look at maya, standing at the door frame, looking angry, and a tad bit scared.

"me? what's all this?! who the fuck are you, and why are you here?!"

"that's none of your business."

"excuse me?! oh fuck this. i'm showing shuri all of this, right the fuck now," you waved your phone at her smugly. maya reached ahead for it but you blocked her hand with your other arm, throwing her against the bookshelf, knocking a few heavy books down that hit her on the head. you took that as your chance and made a run for it.

while running, you opened your sling bag and put your phone inside, zipping it up and putting the sling around your shoulder to make sure the phone wouldn't fall down anywhere.

the sound of bullets being fired gave you an extra push to make you run faster. just then, maya switched to a different weapon. it sent a thick string of black slime that got hold of your foot and yanked you down. she then changed the setting to withdraw the slime, pulling your body to her so that she wouldn't have to run after you. she used a weapon that you designed against you. unbelievable. while that was happening, you took off an earring and hurriedly sent an SOS signal to the first contact that popped up, and threw your earring aside.

your body was being violently dragged towards maya, and when you were close enough, she made a move to get your purse. you punched her in the nose and pushed her head aside, giving you enough space to get up and a break for it again. that's when maya drove a knife in your thigh. you yelled in pain, as you tried to move. but maya was one step ahead. she took a white cloth and put it over your mouth. at that point, you realised that fighting against her was futile. in your final moments of consciousness, you took off your bracelet and threw it down before passing out.

maya smirked, proud at herself as she dragged your body to a secluded corner of the floor. drops of blood from your thigh marked her path. a large, potted plant stood there. she kicked it down, and pressed a button on the side, revealing a secret tunnel opening. she carelessly threw your body down the tunnel and gave you a slight push, following you afterwards.

***

"yeah, well, that's how i learned using a blowtorch to reheat a grilled cheese sandwich was a bad idea," riri spoke and the waitress laughed, smiling profusely.

they looked cute together, and shuri hated to interrupt the moment. but if the message wasn't an accident, and your life was actually at stake, then she knew that she had to do something about it.

"riri! i need your help to find y/n,"

"why don't you just track her with those beads?"

"it says she's right at the club, which doesn't make sense because i can't see her anywhere,"

the waitress interrupted their conversation. "if y/n is the type of person to trespass, you might want to check the third floor. she might've gotten too drunk and gone there by accident,"

riri smiled at the woman and thanked her for the suggestion, taking shuri's hand to lead her to the elevator.

"wait a minute, wasn't y/n supposed to be with you the entire time? why'd she leave?"

shuri sighed, angry at herself. she told riri what happened, causing the american to frown at her.

"dude, what the fuck?! that was totally uncalled for. y/n was just tryna help you. and besides, the rejection hurt her already. you didn't need to bring it up again,"

shuri stayed quiet. she knew what she did was wrong. but the constant hammering in her head robbed her of the ability to think properly.

the elevator door opened and they walked around, hoping to find you. the atmosphere was sinister. both women could tell that something bad happened there. riri looked at her friend. "i'll check the right side, you check the lift," shuri nodded silently and walked away, carefully assessing the scene. her feet led her to the very secluded room you found before, and she was more than shocked when she found everything.

the stalker board. the computer with wakanda's security secrets. it was all so overwhelming. what hit her hard was when she saw this one symbol on this piece of paper.

it was at if it put her in some sort of trance. memories flashed through her mind. the symbol was of the french embassy. she remembered seeing it when she first saw maya.

only when maya first introduced herself, she didn't go by that name. she said something else, but shuri couldn't remember. it was as if someone drugged her.

was that possible? was someone brave enough to drug the protector of wakanda? her thoughts were interrupted when she heard riri yell for her.

"shuri! i found something!!"

she ran towards riri's voice, and stopped when she saw the girl hold something in her hands.

"it's y/n's earring. she dropped it. do you think it's some sort of clue?" riri asked. shuri looked at the piece of jewelry to be sure. yes. it was yours. her gaze went down to the drops of blood on the floor, trailing off elsewhere. she gestured to it. riri got the message. both of them silently trailed the path of blood until it stopped and a knocked down plant.

shuri went closer to get a better look, and found the button. slightly hesitant, she pushed it, and the secret door opened up. both women looked at each other.

"you think that's where she went?" riri spoke as she looked around the tunnel.

shuri spotted the black bracelet on the floor and picked it up. "this bracelet belongs to y/n. i bought this for her last year. i think she dropped it on purpose. you were right. she's leaving clues for us,"

"but where does this tunnel lead to?"

the black panther lifted her kimoyo beads up. "griot. scan this opening, please. tell me where it leads to,"

"just one moment, panther," griot stayed quiet for a few seconds. "it appears to lead to a cave, your majesty. it's hidden quite well, deep within the ground. i sense some water bodies nearby. i believe it is somewhere near the river border,"

"okay, well, we're going after her," riri started removing her jewelry, getting ready to fight whoever tried to harm you.

"one moment, miss williams. i believe entering through the same opening may be a foolish choice, as you would land right in front of the enemy. there is another entrance to the cave. but you need to be able to hold your breath to use it."

"griot, do you have access to any security footage here?"

"my apologies, panther, but there are no surveillance cameras here. maya had them removed once she bought club purple,"

shuri groaned in frustration. "alright. send me the coordinates for the second opening. alert okoye and the dora milaje. get them on standby. i'm getting my girl back,"

shuri and riri sped their way back to the palace so that shuri could get her suit. riri changed into a bulletproof tracksuit she made for herself a couple years ago. they couldn't go save you in their club outfits, could they?!

while the royal talon fighter sped its way to the second entrance to the secret tunnel, riri asked her friend what she found on the other side of the hallway.

"maya... that's not her real name. y/n was right. she was using me. there was something off about her. i should've listened. this is all my fault," shuri dragged a hand on her face as riri rubbed her back.

"don't worry. we'll find her. she's gonna be okay. but wait, what did you say about maya? that ain't her real name?"

"i don't know, my memory is being weird. i somehow cannot recall what happened the day i met her. how we ended up dating. it's as if--"

"as if you were drugged?" riri finished the sentence. suddenly, everything clicked. shuri remembered everything, and blurted all of it out to riri.

***

you woke up. jittery, confused. taking a look at your surroundings, you realised that maya had you captured. you were tied to a wooden chair, and you seemed to be stuck in some sort of cave. there was a table in front of you, with a small black rectangular object. it looked like a taser, but you weren't quite sure. the wound on your leg was bandaged up. but who bandaged you in the first place?

"rise and shine, you little bitch," maya's voice loomed from behind you. she walked around to face you, and you sneered at the sight.

"oh i knew there was something off about you,"

"oh, yes, you clever girl," you noticed the change in her accent. initially, she spoke in an american accent. then, it changed to a french accent.

you raised an eyebrow. "french? what are you, a spy or something?"

she let out a sinister laugh. "well, yes. you could say that. i suppose since i'm about to kill you, i can tell you who i really am," well, there it was. maya's truth. what you'd been waiting for.

"my real name isn't maya. it's roberts. gabrielle roberts. i work for the french embassy, and was sent here to gain intel on wakanda and their military facilities. to get that close, i needed to get into the palace. and what better way than to seduce the queen?"

you laughed mockingly. "bullshit. shuri would've seen that coming a mile away,"

gabrielle sighed. "yes, you're right. she did. she was very skeptical of me when she first met me. i tried seducing her the old fashioned way, but she was entrapped by another woman. you, i believe."

"huh? excuse me??"

"did you not know? it's so obvious. i had to spend some time spying on shuri before i could approach her. she's in love with you."

you weren't buying it. you spent a decent 2 months telling yourself that shuri never wanted you that way and never will. and you refused to believe the word of a woman who lied about her identity to everyone.

"if she was so in love with me, then how did you bag her in the first place?"

"oh. simple. i drugged her."

"YOU WHAT?!"

"ah, relax. nothing too serious. although i had to keep giving her large doses for the drug to work. that lady's metabolism never takes a break,"

the strength of the black panther. shuri's body could break down complex chemicals within moments, so gabrielle had to continuously drug shuri to make sure she could still stay close to her, to gather all the intel she needed.

fortunately, she hadn't given shuri a single dose in over 6 hours, which was enough for the effects of the drug to completely wear off.

"so if you needed shuri for the intel, why'd you bring me here?"

"because, for the final part of my plan, i need to get access to the weaponry database. and as far as my research goes, you're the only one who can crack the code which will give me access to those records. so," she dragged your chair to the table and opened up a laptop in front of you.

"do it."

"do what?"

"open up those records. or i will blow your brains out," she shoved a gun to your head. you looked at gabrielle with wary eyes.

"dude, how stupid are you? how do you expect me to use a laptop if my fucking hands are tied behind my back?!" gabrielle sighed and moved to untie you. your wrist was swollen and bruised.

"i can't do it. my hand is busted. and besides, there's an encrypted code protecting foreign users from entering the database. it'll take months to break through it,"

"i don't have TIME for this!" gabrielle's voice echoed through the walls of the cave. she grabbed the taser and brought it to your abdomen, burning you with the current. silent tears ran down your cheeks. you couldn't die like this.

"i give you five minutes. figure it out, or i'll open that latch on the floor and flood the place. you have a fear of water, don't you? ah, it'll be hilarious watching you drown," with that, gabrielle walked away.

you started hyperventilating. things weren't looking so great for you. you weren't lying when you said the encrypted code would take months to break through. hell, it took nearly a year to make it that secure! you looked around the cave, trying to find a way to escape, to break through. the latch down opened up to water, but you had no idea how long you'd have to hold your breath until you'd reach the shore.

you left shuri some clues. the SOS message, the jewelry, the blood. you hoped that she'd find those.

ah, who am i kidding? she doesn't love me, she'll never love me. and now, i'm gonna die alone. why? cause i'm a paranoid bitch.

your five minutes were up and gabrielle walked back inside, an evil grin plastered on her face.

"time to die, whore."

you froze, accepting your fate. gabrielle lifted up her gun, ready to pull the trigger, when an explosion from behind sent her body hurtling in front. water and rocks splashed everywhere as you tried to see who was there.

shuri.

it was shuri. she first ran to you, her mask disappearing.

"sthandwa? are you okay?" she assessed you for any injuries, and got anxious as she saw your bleeding thigh and swollen hand.

"i'm fine, i promise," you replied, but you looked like you were gonna pass out. riri came from behind you and grabbed you gently, taking you outside where the royal talon fighter hovered, a medical team inside prepped to help you with any injuries.

"you drug me, lie to me, and harm the woman i love the most. give me one good reason why i shouldn't blow your face up right now," shuri glared gabrielle, hot rage coursing through her veins. the drugs were now completely out of her system, and she was ready to rip the spy's throat into shreds.

the mask of her suit hid her face as she lunged at the french woman, claws ripping at her chest. gabrielle let out a groan of pain. she tried to fight back, but the black panther was too strong. water began seeping through, and shuri knew she had to leave before she drowned as well. she considered helping gabrielle for a moment, before deciding that a) she was busted pretty bad and wasn't going to make it, and b) she was a threat to wakanda so there was really no point in saving her. the french embassy had come for wakanda before. they had to set an example, so that no other country would pull shit like that again.

shuri managed to get out just before the entire cave was flooded, and ordered the dora milaje to seal the exit, just in case.

the medical staff on the jet aided to your injuries, giving you some ointment and pain pills. before you knew it, you were dropped at the palace. you asked if you could be led to your apartment, but shuri insisted that you and riri stay at the palace for the night. too tired (and traumatised) to argue, you agreed and were shown to your quarters, where you laid down and were immediately taken over by exhaustion as you fell asleep.

***

rays of sunshine pooled through the large window as you slowly opened your eyes, getting up to see a tray sitting neatly on your bedside table. a bowl of oatmeal, topped with your favourite nut butter and fruits lay on the tray, along with the pain medication you were prescribed, a glass of water, some orange juice, and a note. you picked the note up first, instantly recognising the handwriting scribbled on it.

eat your breakfast, and call me once you're done

shuri <3

she drew a little heart next to her name. how cute. you got up to brush your teeth before scarfing down the food, juice, and medicine. seeing as you hadn't eaten in ages, your hunger made sense. as ordered to, you raised your kimoyo beads and gently tapped them to alert the queen.

"y/n! you're awake, how are you feeling?"

"pretty alright. i ate the breakfast you sent, took my meds, and i just got outta the shower. every part of my body is still in pain though,"

"don't worry, i'm on my way right now,"

"oh, no, shuri you don't have to--"

she hung up before you could finish. typical shuri.

a few minutes later, you heard a gentle knock on your door. "come in" you said softly. shuri's cute morning face popped up as she slowly made her way to your bed, sitting down next to you.

both of your backs were against the bed frame as you faced each other.

"hi," shuri muttered.

"hey,"

she didn't look up at you. slightly confused, you grabbed her chin and tilted her head upwards.

"why won't you look at me?"

her eyes started to water. "i guess i just feel guilty. if i had listened to you at first, i could've sent that french bitch away a long time ago. but you got hurt, because of me,"

"hey, hey..." you tried to console her. "don't blame yourself for this. you were drugged. we both know the great shuri udaku wouldn't fall for a stupid scam like that if she was in her senses," she let out a lugh after your comment and you smiled, happy that you could improve her mood.

as you got flashbacks from your cave encounter with gabriella, a specific thing she said crept up to your brain. and you knew you had to bring it up eventually.

"so, listen..." you fidgeted and shuri gently took your hand, intertwining your fingers together. it was a simple act you guys did as kids to show that you had each others backs. it always made your heart flutter.

"in the cave, when gabriella confessed to drugging you, she said it was because she wanted to seduce you but she couldn't do that while you were sober," shuri cringed when you said 'seduce' and you bit back a laugh at her expression.

"she said she couldn't seduce you without drugging you, because you were in love with me." shuri's head shot up as her eyes widened.

"now i don't know which drug she gave, or how much it affected your memory. but i'm pretty sure you didn't forget the day i told you i love you. and yes, i might not be as entirely over you as i said, but i'm okay with you not seeing me that way. i mean, i'll get over it i guess--"

she cut you off by smashing her lips against yours. it took you a moment to realise what was happening before you started to kiss back. you gently grabbed her shirt collar as she grabbed your waist, pulling you towards her lap, making you straddle her. you made out like that for a while before your need for oxygen interfered, causing you to pull away.

shuri smiled like a kid in a candy store. you smiled back.

"you won't believe how long i've wanted to do that. y/n, ever since the day i met you, i knew i was going to make you mine. how can someone not love you?" you giggled before kissing her again.

"so... are we girlfriends now?" you asked, the smile still stuck on your face.

"hmmm, well, let me think about it," you smacked her arm and she laughed.

"alright, alright, y/n y/l/n, my gorgeous princess, my sweetheart, my one and only, will you be my girlfriend? please?" you laughed and kissed her with all your heart. when you parted again, you chucked to yourself.

"what's so funny, sthandwa?"

"i'm just picturing riri's reaction when we tell her this. she's gonna lose the last bit of sanity she has left," both of you laughed at the image before lying down to cuddle, enjoying each other's embrace for the rest of the day.

*lil bonus scene as a sorry for taking so damn long to upload this*

"ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?!" riri yelled out as you and shuri laughed. her reaction was everything you pictured and more.

"FINALLY!! GODDAMN YOU WILL NOT BELIEVE THE SHIT I'VE BEEN THROUGH!! SHURI YOUR GIRLFRIEND IS A THIRSTY ASS BITCH!! SHOULD'VE HEARD HER FANTASISING ABOUT THIS VIBRANIUM STRAP SHE TOLD ME ABOUT--"

"RIRI!!" you yelled and chased after her in shuri's lab. the queen laughed to herself.

bast, she's crazy. but she's mine. and i'd do anything for her.

[doubleddenden]

Enough time has passed that I think I can do an accurate full scale review for Indigo Disk.

My initial first impressions review of 6/10 was spot on, even with the post game mechanics and additional story.

More under the cut, beware of major spoilers

Story

What's here is fine, but flawed. It is way too short, even with the extra doodads, and not enough time and energy went into it.

Since this is a continuation of Teal Mask, I was expecting to run into some of Kieran's former bullies or to meet a certain Pokémon on his team, or at least see more instances of him being a jerk to other students, but besides a couple of instances there's not really a lot going on here to build him up.

Same with Carmine. You battle her once and that's it. I was hoping to have some kind of introspection with her, maybe she's a victim of a Mean Girls scenario and that's why she became a tad bitchy, but at best she's just worried about her brother and along for the ride.

Terapagos is supposed to be the star of the DLC- literally named The Treasure of Area Zero, but he barely had screen time besides 1 very amazing boss battle. I fear this is another anime Zygarde situation.

Briar basically did nothing besides be a little reckless. Literally if she were removed from the plot, nothing of value would have been lost. She's essentially just a red herring they through out thinking they were clever for tricking us into thinking she was the big bad or at least a bit more important, but in actuality she was just a let down all around. I can't help but feel like they had something bigger planned but scrapped it.

Not to mention the loose ends still left behind regarding Area Zero and the book. Yes I did that extra scene, and honestly it just confuses me further, so I assume we have to wait until the "epilog" is released.

Still, a half assed "paradoxes are from other timelines" was the only answer we got about how Paradox Pokémon got to Area Zero before the time machine. Not the professor or someone else bootstrap looping by sending Pokémon to the past to purposely plant seeds to ensure they come to AZ, just a very tissue paper strength answer.

We still get nothing about the mysterious symbols, the strange metals, the crystal tree, nothing is really answered and it's probably just the result of a room of writers at Game Freak patting themselves on the back and saying "we like mystery :) we did good!" Well, sorry, no you didn't.

This gives me Lost vibes and The Promised Nederland vibes. The Promised Nederland vibes in the sense they built this amazing potential in the base game- season 1 of you will- filled with mystery and intrigue, but then tried to either ignore or half ass things in Season 2- The dlc. Lost comes into play because I honestly think they had no intention of truly explaining anything and had no real clear cut end game in mind except to get people hooked. Like I'm nor asking for a Legends Paldea where we explore the depths with Heath- okay I do want that but I'm not asking right now- I would have been very, very satisfied if there were at least more journals and entries or pages that explained things. As it is now, though, it just won't happen.

And maybe I'm wrong and the epilog will fix everything and give us the answers I seek, but I sincerely doubt it.

At least what's here is passable enough. I like the BBE4 and Drayton is a loveable piece of shit. I still hate that Lacey confirms Clay fucked though. No Elesa is not her mom, that's fake info.

I miss Carmine and Kieran and hate that they're just gone as of now.

BBQ quests

Tedious. Tedious and monotonous. I don't want to play multi-player and I don't have friends with Nintendo Online and DLC to play with, nor the bandwidth. Why am I being punished for that? The quests are fine but you have to do them for several fucking hours to get anything worth it out of the deal.

Coaches

I like the idea and love all the different interactions here and there. The rematch teams are updated, too, but unfortunately remain single battles, so they're pretty easy in comparison to the rest of Indigo Disk. I did have trouble with some after changing out my party for weaker pokemon, but it was never a critical danger moment except for Hassel.

I will say, I love the implications of some of the dialog. Tulip and the school nurse are just very lesbians for Dendra, Saguro and Kofu radiate General Armstrong and Sig handshake energy, and Geeta is trying to recruit everything with a pulse to join the Elite 4.

It's this level of heart I wish they bothered to put into the base DLC.

What I hate is that it costs so much to rotate them around to get gold borders. It's necessary to do something special apparently- but btw the last 3 slots are story locked until the Epilog drops. Yaya future content, boo withholding content.

Oh and they fixed Geeta's team. Her new ace is actually terrifying.

New Pokémon

Fantastic all around. Archaludon is fun af to use, Hydrapplin fixes what I dislike about Dipplin, the paradoxes are all neat, Terapagos's Stellar form is beautiful and powerful as hell, great all around.

Music

I think we're in Sonic territory where the quality of games goes down but the music just keeps getting better and better. No flaws, love the Unova love! It even fixes Ed Sheeran's Celestial imo- a song kinda shoved in that has nothing to do with Pokémon except maybe to trigger content flags on YouTube.

The remix by Toby Fox actually has elements of music from Scarlet and Violet, it's chill overall, and the lyrics actually sort of kinda have context now? Rinse and Repeat makes it sound relevant to the cycles of bullying and the paradox plots as a whole, and Kieran's spiral actually fits it. Overall a vast improvement.

Difficulty

Guys, it is refreshingly difficult. It's like a dip into Colosseum again with the strategies the BBE4 uses. Drayton actually beat me TWICE. I NEVER lose. The rest were easier, but still required a bit more thinking than "press A to win."

The only downside is that it is sort of a snowball effect. Initially it might be difficult to overcome, but you will gain levels very quickly, which of course diminishes challenge. I'm not joking when I say that the team I went in with, roughly late 60s to 70 by the time I caught them all, are now ALL level 100, which is the quickest I've ever gotten a completely fresh team to it.

Customization

I said it before but it's just lacking. The new uniforms look better than most of the others, come in more varieties, and I'll be honest? Feel less fetishy in the l*li and sh*ta direction. I'm still not completely satisfied but I can make it work. New hair still sucks but I do like the new Star glasses and uniform.

I'm just going to say it though, this was definitely a way to cut corners on customization and they should just let us dress how we want again. Too much limitation makes me look like everyone else playing the game. It was dumb but excusable this time, but it won't fly again in the future. Just saying.

Graphics and performance

Let's do it like this:

The good: graphics in some areas, when loaded in, genuinely look up to date and beautiful to look at. The tropical area, savanna, and under depths are very beautiful locations, the classrooms look extremely polished, lots of gorgeous visuals all around, and even older Pokémon have some updated visuals.

I'll also say the Terrarium is just better visually than Kitakami and Paldea.

The bad: performance still sucks ass and Nintendo, The Pokémon Company, and Game Freak should all be fucking ashamed for charging $95 for what is essentially a stuttering mess that struggles not to shit itself at times. Like the GAUL to leave in map flickering in the first cutscene meant to show you how beautiful and vast the Terarium is is astounding. Give back your Award for Excellence until you actually deserve it, you're no longer an indie company and it's time you behaved like it, Game Freak. Absolute shame on you. You've had over a year to fix this and still haven't.

World's richest franchise, people.

Overall

There's plenty to salvage here that makes it fun and engaging, but the same issues have yet to be fixed and the story just refuses to tie up some loose ends that NEEDED to be explored. It's also just CRIMINALLY short, and I actually took my time. What we got is okay but it's not the same quality of story we got for Arven or Team Star, and honestly I feel like it would have been better to save these characters for another game. They padded it out with tedious quests that just get annoying after a while and feel like a punishment, especially for single players.

While I love the idea of old style event Pokémon coming back, I hate that we have to wait to experience something that- heads up- is ALREADY IN THE GAME. That's just stupid imo and would have really helped keep things going.

So yeah, just barely passing at 6/10. Depending on the epilog, that may go between a 4 or 7.

[wily-one24]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

Tagged by @rowark (If "anyone who wants to" counts as tagging, and I am going to, so there. If that makes you angry, perhaps you need a nap?).

1. How many works do you have on AO3? 56.

2. What's your total AO3 word count? 1,248,713.

3. What fandoms do you write for?

The main ones I have written for include Profiler, Buffy, Firefly, Veronica Mars, Once Upon A Time.

And most recently Law and Order: SVU.

I have delved into other fandoms such as The Inside, Rizzoi and Isles, Supergirl, and Heroes.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Memory Cloud - 1,413

Paint It Black - 1,320

The Blue Moon - 811 (it's the smut, isn't it? I know it, you pervs).

The Waning Moon - 783

Elmo's ABCs - 744

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I try to. I respond to as many as possible. Especially if the fic is fresh. But I have responded to comments on fics that are months/years old. I do miss some comments, sometimes I'm busy and my brain says "I'll get to that later", but then my brain is... not perfect... and it forgets.

However, I love responding to comments. I have made friends in the comments. I have the best discussions in my comments.

6. What is a fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Oh, geez. Like, you're asking me, the Queen of Angst? There were LJ icons with "Jacqui + Angst = OTP". Maybe if I go by fandoms? Firefly's angstiest ending was "DIdn't Mean Nothin'", but also "Pieces" had a super angsty epilogue.

Veronica Mars' angstiest ending? I mean, they were mostly angst middles, weren't they? Super dark middles with hopeful endings. Veronica did bring out the optimist in me. She was so young, she deserves her life to improve after all the shit canon put her through. I guess if I had ever finished "Bitter Revenge" it would have been a tad angsty? But there would have been hope, becauses he would have had the baby!

Swan Queen, whoo. Um, OH YEAH, "You and Me (We Wanted It All)". HA, that was angst a'plenty. Even PIB and Memory Cloud had hopeful (if not happy) endings. But that one was... just some light angst for angst sake.

I mean I only have three fics with SVU, (two of which form part of a series), and only one of which is finished. BUT, I can with confidence say that "Wicked Game" ends pretty fucking bleakly and angstily.

(okay, so I went back to my VM fic masterlist on LJ, and whew, okay, so there's a whole bunch of "exploration" fics that don't necessarily change canon, just delve into it like "Neptune CA Mother's Club" deals with the shit poor mothers in Neptune, "Courting Disaster" devles into Logan's abuse, "The Tender Bruise" and "Bruises In the Mirror" were both angst fests that didn't end happily per se. Also, "The Ghost and Mrs Mars" was... not hopeful at all. Man, I *forgot* a LOT of them).

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

🤣🤣🤣

Ok, let me think. I'm assuming we're not talking smut fics? LIke, happy endings? 'Cause I have a bunch of PWPs which could be considered 'happy'. But... let's say what a reasonable person might be called happy...

I think "Sleep Perchance" was pretty optimistic and its sequel "... To Dream" was set to end in a much more positive place than it began. "Whisky Bears" was just a fun fic, drunken fun on a spaceship. What more do you want? And "Boobs" was just silly.

"The Best Deceptions"!! That was such a good fluffy sweet fic. It's a WIP, so no ending, but still. OMG, I forgot this one. It's my only real non-angst fluff fic.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I used the laughing so hard I cried emoji too early, didn't I?

I mean, I would say usually not. I have spent decades in fandom and Once Upon A Time was the only fandom I got hate in.

A small amount for "The Blue Moon", because apparently there was a second 'Emma as a stripper' fic and I was accused of plagiarising, but this was later rescinded because the fics were totally different.

And also when someone decided to get really spiteful and tell me they lost all respect for me because I dared to find Emma sexy instead of fetishisizing Regina for all eternity.

OBVIOUSLY, the most intense hatred I got was for Paint It Black. The vilest, most bitter things were thrown at me. In the comments, in private messages. I got death threats. I had rape wished on me. I was told my kids should be taken away. I was accused of trying to lure in lesbians only to give them 'straight cock filled depravity".

Because there was a man in one sex scene. Meanwhile, it was never listed as a purely lesbian fic, and the two ladies have canonically HAD male romantic and sexual partners in the past. So... not sure what the huge vitriol was about.

I sure did learn to TAG PROPERLY after that, though. My god.

Get a grip, fandom, get a grip.

No other fandom has been that unhealthy. At least, not for me.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Yes, I do. I have written both F/M and F/F. I have also written F/M/F, M/F/M, and F/F/F.

There's usually at least ONE woman involved. I have not, nor am I interested in writing M/M fics (boy parts iz icky).

Most readers find the scenes pretty hot. I tend to be descriptive and emotional when writing smut. Unless it's a PWP, there's usually a whole bunch of motivation and emotion involved. Even when it's a PWP there's usually a whole lot of characterisation in there.

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

I tend not to?

That said, I have written one.

It was a Heroes/Veronica Mars crossover, in which Sylar mistakes Veronica for his recently murdered (by his own hand, natch) girlfriend Elle and perhaps loses his very unstable mind over it a little. Leading to a slight case of kidnapping, Keith and Noah coupling up Buddy Cop style for some cross country chasing, super powered hijinx, and UBER ANGST. The tag line reads "What Happens when a Serial Killer and a Serial Victim Meet".

To be honest, it was kind of amazing and I loved it. It was working up to be Super Dubcon, but hadn't quite gotten there yet. I am sad that this remains a WIP. I would have loved to have finished this.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I've had some fics put on GoodReads, but they took them down when I asked them to.

I did have one of my fic scenes pretty much plagiarised in Firefly. What makes it worse is that they used it for a couple I hate. I let it go, though. That fic never quite got the same steam mine did. There was no point giving it attention.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Not that I know of. I think it has been asked before, but I am a little wary of that sort of thing. I lose control of it if other people change it.

That said, I have had comments on my fics in a completely different language and I used Google Translate to both understand and reply. I will make the effort.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No.

I am jaded. I am very particular about my fics and, as said above, I do not like to lose control over them (what, control issues? Who? Me?)

I am also heavily jaded for things like fic swaps. It's my own fault, I realise this, because I would put so much effort and write thousands upon thousands of words of fic and get a 500 word piece back and it really put me off. Again, I know it's my fault, I chose to put that much effort in, but still.

Wait...I am having vague recollections of something like a fic round-robin? I could not tell you what fandom (I assume Firefly, but not sure), and certainly could never link back to it or even know how to google for it. I guess that counts? BUt I doubt it, because I can't even tell you what the fic was about or what my contribution to it was. So... no.

Hmmm, I was also involved in a Season Rewrite for Profiler back int he day, but all those fics are lost to the internet heyday and you'll never find them. Huh, I htink my episode was called "Lady In Red". (omg, THE MEMORIES).

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

Geez. Asking the hard questions. I don't know. All my ships hold a place in my heart, that's why I write them. So, the answer is... I guess... if you've seen me write for that couple, then THAT couple is my favourite in that moment.

(I like, I have had a few fic requests that I've filled that haven't really been my cup of tea, Veronica/Lamb for instance, or Jayne/River, or Simon/River. I don't like them, but I have written them).

15. What's a wip you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

All of them. ALL OF THEM. I mean, "Adam's Rib" had so many stories to tell and I could have gotten lost in "The Best Deceptions" world. Omg, that was such a happy, schmoopy fic. Let me go back up to happy fics for a sec...

"... To Dream", "Bitter Revenge", and "Girl int he Mirror" will be my sadness from VM.

and ALL my SQ WIPs. "The New Moon", "A Swan Is A Beautiful Creature", "The Girl of My Dreams (Is Giving Me Nightmares)", "Subject 3662", "Blooding the Water". *sob*. I'm sorry!!!

16. What are your writing strengths?

Angst.

Detail.

Lots of people comment on my phrasing and pacing. The way I string words together and have breaks and just bring forth the imagery. It's never just "and then this happened and then this happened and he put his hand here and she put her mouth there".

No matter where I am planning to go with a fic, i always start from a canon point and keep that canon history. I try to keep characerisations believable. They may get into plots and situations that they would never in canon, but I like to hope I keep their reactions believable and true.

I like to delve into the emotion of it. You know the tumblr meme "Put that guy into situations". THAT'S what I do. And then I examine the ever living fuck out of it.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I don't have a beta reader.

Which is troublesome, because my hands don't work properly anymore. At least, not as well as they used to. I have what's called dupuytren's contracture. It's a thickening fibrous band around the tendons of the hand. My hands aren't restricted, so much at the moment, but it does slow down my pinkie fingers. Which means when I touch type, there are so many mistakes. And I can't NOT touch type.

These come out mainly in things like double capitals (ever wonder why so many times in SVU fics I have the name "LIv" and not "Liv", it's because that capital 'i' is harder to spot. If I type "THe" I see it and fix it. But my eye seems to skip over the "LIv" and "HIs" words.

It also comes out in the spaces in the wrong place. I will type t he instead of 'the', or 'ith appened' instead of 'it happened'.

I spend A LOT OF TIME, going back and editing sentences I have just written. The amount of times I have had to go back and delete/edit words just in this post alone is staggering. It makes things take twice as long.

I have had to work really hard to get back into writing. I stopped for a great deal of time, many years, because I was so bothered by this.

Add to that, the kidney failure gives me brain fog, so I have to spend a lot of time trying to remember the specific words I want to use. For someone who uses words INSTRINSICALLY, knowing there is a specific word I want and not being able to access it in my memory? FUCKING FRUSTRATING, I Can tell you.

Another great weakness is starting a dozen fics at once and being unable to keep up and then being overwhelmed and losing momentum.

This is how I have so many WIPs.

I keep that in mind now, which is why I am limiting myself to two ongoing SVU fics and THAT IS IT. No more until they're finished.

THough I have actually been writing SO MUCH lately. At least once chapter a week. So this is good. Makes me happy.

I get the feeling that I tend to homogenise my characterisations a little. But this doesn't seem to be a complaint of any commenters, so I try not to let my imagination run wild with me.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I have done it.

Firefly fic, by necessity, uses a lot of Chinese. I used to know the html to do the hover type and would have Chinese dialogue with hover type translations. It was fun, because as is the Firefly traditions, you could have the filthiest things in Chinese and the censors wouldn't pick it up. (My favourite thing I wrote translated to... something like "Your mother sucks rotten beef sticks in hell" if I am remembering correctly).

Alas, I have forgotten the html for that. I am sure it's just a google away, but... I don't really need translations for English fics.

I also did a bunch of research for Trigidasleng. I never really wrote The 100 fics, though I did write some drabbles. I probably did more research that necessary for the mount of fic I actually wrote.

But, yeah, I think if the source material calls for it, you should definitely put the effort in.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Who wants a laugh? When I was in primary school, 3rd grade I think, we wrote books. We got to type them on a computer, the teacher printed them out, then bound them and we drew the pictures and coloured them in.

I still have mine.

It's called "Bugs Bunny, Brooke, and the Giant Banana", which was a combination of Bugs Bunny (natch), mary sue insert of my friend Brooke, and James and the GIant Peach.

BUAH HAH HAH.

But truly? My first fandom was Profiler. This is the show that got me ONTO the net, introduced me to fandoms and message boards and fics. If it weren't for those people, I wouldn't be here now.

20. Favorite fic you've written?

Don't ask me to choose a favourite child!

Are you kidding me?

I cannot. I can't even do it per fandom. I love them all, which is why I wrote them.

How could you be so cruel?

Tagging: YOU, if you want to.

[watchit-kal]

The Purge Franchise is one of my Favorites of all Time

Personally, I do not believe James DeMonaco ever got the proper recognition for his creation. In a time of regurgitation, rinse, and repeat, he made something brand spanking new. A few weeks ago I sat down and watched every movie “in order,” so join me as I rank them and sing DeMonaco’s praises along the way. From how he chose to draw in the audience to who he chose to direct the film, James DeMonaco has earned himself a spot on my people to watch list. I honestly want to rewatch the series as well, but I just watched it a few months ago (for the third time), so it seems a tad over the top.

Now, I will admit some of The Purge fans are downright weirdos comparable to those brainless The Boys fans. There is, however, a subgroup of each that is actually capable of critical thought, and I invite you to join us as we appreciate the story behind the violence. Firstly, let’s agree on the proper timeline:

The First Purge 10/10

The Purge 7/10

The Purge: Anarchy 9/10

The Purge: Election Year* 8/10 (the timing was what was most important about this release if not for actual worldly events the timeline may have flown better)

The Forever Purge 6/10

The Purge is unique not because no one else could have ever possibly thought about, but because someone was brave enough to simply do it. No source material to pull from, no visible demand for its relation, just art. The purge debuted at a time in our country where we were being more and more divisive. I like to think The Purge explores a very probable reality for the United States. It is important to note Michael Bay was involved with the Purge franchise and that man does not pick duds. In the first Purge movie released, starring, Ethan Hawke, DeMonaco did what had to be done in order to encapsulate audiences moving forward. In order for someone to be capable of writing The Purge, you must also assume they are a great observer of people, what they care about, and how they operate. I think this is demonstrated perfectly in the order in which he wrote this franchise and also who he chose to center stories around. In the first movie we follow an upper middle class white family. People who typically should not be effected by this gruesome holiday. A husband whose income relies on the continuation of this dreary day and a family that remains grateful. It was only fitting Mr. Hawke had to meet his end by the conclusion of the film, after all his family was only targeted because of his occupation. Although, I found them painfully boring they were the perfect family to draw in the majority of the world, which hates watching white people die. It was with them DeMonaco taught us the rules of this night and began to pull back the curtain on its gruesome nature. He also showed us above all else, people can be good.

Personally, The First Purge, when DeMonaco teamed up with director Gerard McMurray, will always be my favorite of the franchise. McMurray is also responsible for Burning Sands, a beautifully shot heart wrenching story about the dangers of hazing. he is moving forward to direct The Resonant, a post apocalyptic comic book series, that he will certainly execute perfectly. McMurray has this way of telling stories through his lens that makes it impossible for you to look away. I also adore that DeMonaco is only ever willing to hand over his babies to hands more capable than his depending the story he wishes to tell. While DeMonaco may very well be Italian or something, the man is white. So, the choice to pick a Howard educated director with an affinity for telling stories of oppression for this film was not lost on me. Do not tell me about his skeletons, DeMonaco is invited to my cookout. The first purge is the tale of how the purge came to be and also the reveal of why it was really created. For me, everything about this film was perfect. The cast, the cinematography, the plot line, and the survivors. This film felt the most real and accurate of all the others (excluding the series). I would actually watch an anthology series depicting the first purge in each city.

The others are pretty repetitive, same idea different layout, the public fighting the rich. The rich starting to lose. Some rich people being kinda okay. The usual. I will say though I felt so bad about being attracted to the Cowboy Casanova initially until this past year when he also played our Black Panther villain, then I gave myself a pass, because I obviously just have impeccable taste.

Anyway sorry for the long break I have been really sick, so even this is some shit, but go watch the purge series its very underrated and tell James DeMonaco you love him.

[northerngoshawk]

2022 Writing Year in Review

thank you @flameohotwife and @chocomd for the tag! great way to start a new year of writing is to look back 

1. Number of stories posted to Ao3: 15! most oneshots and drabbles, 1 that is a multichap still in the works

2. Word count this year: 75,791

3. Fandoms I wrote for: Avatar: The Last Airbender

4. Pairings: Aang/Katara

5. Stories with the most:

Kudos: i lost it all again (can you help me find it once more?), the second fic in my Katara-centric series

Bookmarks: dreamless dreams

Comment threads:  see the sky and sea (and remember me)

Word count: see the sky and sea (and remember me)

6. Work I’m most proud of (and why): there’s a lot, but i guess i will have to say dreamless dreams, my platonic zukaang fic, since i really don’t like Zuko that much lol. he’s definitely not my fav, esp because of fandom, so it was a surprise to write this, and i’ll admit i was a tad worried i would write him ooc because of my own bias. but surprisingly enough, i’ve been told the way i portrayed Zuko in this fic is very very in-character for him and serves as exploration that most fandom would avoid, and the platonic zukaang was also something i never thought i would write but seemed to execute well haha. overall, i guess i’m proud of this fic because it’s a concept that’s out of my comfort zone that i think i’ve executed pretty well, haha

7.   Work I’m least proud of (and why): protecting you, which is a prequel to  where we're meant to be. i had a kind of hard time writing this, and if i look back on it now, it just seems... cheesy, almost? idk it’s just Aang whump so maybe i just feel it’s a little senseless lol.

8.   Share or describe a favorite review you received: i think my favorite review this year was actually from @chocomd and pertained to dreamless dreams! choco managed to understand all the underlying parallels i wrote into the fic and gushed how much she loved the way i wrote the platonic zukaang 🥺 before her review, almost no one was kudos’ing the fic, so i was wracked with so much doubt that i wrote it well, and with her review, it really helped ease my worries of oocness for Zuko & Aang.

9.   A time when writing was really, really hard: while i was in school as a STEM major lol. that should be self-explanatory.

10. A scene or character you wrote that surprised you: i already mentioned Zuko, but there’s actually two more characters i was surprised to write. one of them was Iroh from my Iroh & Lu Ten fic leaves let go (to fall from the vine). i never ever ever thought i would ever write Iroh, and he kind of intimidated me because he’s such a wise, complex character--there was no fathomable way i could write him well, or so i thought. i seemed to manage okay for this fic tho haha

the other character is Hakoda from my Hakoda Adopts Aang fic these sleepless nights we spend (waiting to come home). also a surprise because in canon, we don’t really see much of him on-screen, not to mention there’s a lack of interaction between him and Aang. again, never really thought i would ever write him, but here we are.

11. A favorite excerpt of your writing:

i have quite a few (and i’ve used them for other asks), so i’ll choose something a little different this time!

this excerpt is the ending section of going back, moving forward:

When Gyatso releases him and Aang finds himself at the doorstep of shadows, he only glances back one final time to see Gyatso nodding with approval, pride shining in his gray eyes.

(i will always wait for you)

When he finds himself walking down the dark hallway, he hears his friends, his family, all calling his name, all pleading with him to come back, come back, and he picks up the pace, rushing towards them.

(i'm coming, i'm coming)

When he sees the differently colored threads (green red navy cerulean) weaving their way towards him as the world falls away into darkness and shadows, he reaches for them, knowing that they're reaching out for him.

(i'm coming back for you)

When he wakes up in his friends' embrace, he lets himself melt into their love and worry and berating because they care, they care, and he almost can't believe he ever doubted it was the right thing to do.

(i'm here)

And when he grows and makes mistakes and matures and builds his own family and learns to live and laugh and love again, Aang finally understands what Gyatso meant all those years ago.

And it feels like coming home.

12. How did you grow as a writer this year: i definitely stepped out of my comfort zone a bit and wrote for characters i never thought i would write for haha. i’m also improving on describing scenery, especially as needed for my multichap lol

13. How do you hope to grow next year: to keep improving on describing scenery. i’m improving right now, but i still have ways to go. also to keep writing characters i never thought i’d write, step out of my comfort zone even more.

14. Who was your greatest positive influence this year as a writer (could be another writer or beta or cheerleader or muse etc etc): @chocomd. we found out we have very similar tastes in the kind of stories we want to read & write, and so she’s been a huge encouragement, especially in a fandom where our specfic tastes aren’t exactly common. her comments especially on see the sky and sea (and remember me) and her eagerness to see its conclusion is really the only reason why i’m still writing this fic.

15. Anything from your real life show up in your writing this year: not really? i mean i lost it all again (can you help me find it once more?) stems from my own feelings of assimilation and not knowing my own culture. other than that, there aren’t any i can think that are truly from my core self; every other fic is just my exploration of canon content or mirroring of things i never have personally experienced. all of my fics have some form of myself in them anyways tho, so

16. Any new wisdom you can share with other writers: don’t be afraid to experiment and break rules of syntax, so long as it makes sense for the themes of the fic. i find the fics i love reading/writing the most are the ones that experiment to reflect the themes of the fic, the state of the character’s mind, etc. (also you can use that as an excuse in case someone gets mad at you 😉)

17. Any projects you’re looking forward to starting (or finishing) in the new year: definitely hoping to finish see the sky and sea (and remember me) this new year, but with the way the climax is playing out and the limited time i have, it could take a while lol. depending on if i get that done, i’m also looking into my 5+1 Aang fic about loneliness, a Katara MCD fic, a Sokka-centric fic that deals with masculinity, and a 5+1 Zuko-centric fic that deals with Zuko beginning to understand the effects of imperialism on the little people.

18. Tag some writers whose answers you’d like to read: @itsmoonpeaches @thinkingisadangerouspastime @justoceanmyth @shameaboutthedilettantism @kataangisforlovers and anyone else!

[sterling-canary]

for the ask game!! 🦅🤩🛒

Do you outline fics or fly by the seat of your pants?

I do tend to outline my fics. Here's an example from something I'm working on (not Bully, its for the 1.3 Corporate Clash update)

1. Multislacker hanging in his office, being lazy, as usual

2. He sees the Pacesetter coming in through his security cameras, and sighs

3. This fucking yutz again

4. Bursts in through the door, leaving a hole like he does in CC Comic 11

5. “I’m challenging you to a race! You, me, tonight, 9:00!”

6. “Why?”

7. “Because!”

8. And he’s gone. He leaves another hole in the process

I have a whole folder in my drive for notes, though there aren't a lot of them. I mostly outline by thinking about it and knowing where its going to go...which leads to a lot of stuff getting lost, heh. I'd say I write down 25% of my outlines.

Who is your favorite character to write?

Tad by far (though I haven't published much with him). I just think he's super interesting. There's a lot of facets to explore with him.

What are some common things you incorporate in your fics? Themes, feels, scenes, imagery, etc.

You know, I've thought long and hard about this, and I'd have to say friendship. I've written a lot of Gen fics, and even fics that are more romance focused still include friends. I care a lot about friendship, it's very important to me, which I guess you can see in my fics.

Close second would be stargazing and stars, for some reason.

Thanks for asking!

[elizacinnamon]

I was thinking, what if Betty had gotten Archie pregnant during season 6 while they had superpowers? Whether or not their child would have been born with powers if Archie and Betty had lost them. Imagine Archie and Betty have a son or daughter and after a while it turns out that the child has powers.

I admit that I’m not super into the whole superhero thing! I loved Season 6 and some of the whole supernatural elements but their powers were a tad silly (and not really relevant to the plot?!?) but that’s Riverdale, I guess.

My current fic Closer to You explores them having a baby in season 6 but (spoiler alert!) the baby doesn’t have powers. Maybe their powers made it super easy for them to conceive or something lol.

[informhub-blog]

10 Ways to Be a Better Chess Player

If you want to be a better at chess as a beginner, it’ll take lots of learning and lots of practicing. Here are 10 tips to get you started:

<<Get FREE video course>>

1. Set a GOAL

You will never be able to hit a target that you cannot see. Yes, setting a target/goal is the first thing you have to do. It can be the target of attaining a norm, increasing ‘X’ ELO points within ‘Y’ time, beating titled players, or even becoming a world champion! Be aware: set and work for one goal at a time. Overloading yourself will not be productive.

2.  Start by memorizing a few famous games- Memorize your games!

Want to learn from the best?

The internet is brimming with many games that some of the most prominent chess players. There is plenty of research and analysis available for your purview too. The more you try and read the games, the better equipped you are with strategies, tactics, and even unconventional ways of playing and winning the game.

Another way of looking at the games is to memorize your games. Playing your games in your head gives you a chance to learn from your mistakes and set your winning moves in stone.

3.  Remember to review and analyze your games!

A chess game played and not analyzed is a game that’s wasted!

Every game gives you a chance to understand your opponent’s moves and check your responses. By avoiding studying a game, you are giving up the opportunity of getting in the depth of your play. You may have won, but was it because of your strong moves or your opponent’s rookie mistakes? You won a game against one player but lost against another with a similar strategy?

Let’s put it in the right perspective.

Only analyzing it to pieces ( pun intended ???? ) will help you! You can explore your games by yourself, with a friend or your opponent, with a coach, a family member.

4. Be open to criticism about your games.

Listen to your coach (if you have one) when it comes to analyzing. Try not to be defensive and just accept that there are different perspectives, and your coach is trying to help you by pointing out where you went wrong.

If you don't have a coach, try to criticize your games yourself. When a blunder occurs, take responsibility for it!! This will help you in the future, I promise. (Basically, with every mistake you could make in life! Own up to it!)

5. Use all your pieces.

After developing, get your pieces to better squares. Use your pieces harmoniously in an attack. Teamwork!

<<Get FREE video course>>

6. Ask for advice from better chess players. Then, take it or leave it!

Ask things like, "What's your favorite chess book for my playing strength?" Or, "What do you think I should I study if I am good at X and bad at Y?" Or, "Whose games should I be analyzing?" And, "So, what are those critical endgames I should know?" Etc

7.  Practice tactics – and then practice some more!

Theoretically, you may know your Sicilian from your Queen’s Gambit.

But are you able to apply the tactics at the right time and a favorable conclusion?

You may find it a tad challenging to act upon if you have not practiced your tactics in various situations.

How often do you work on puzzles?

A typical player should work on at least ten puzzles a day. The point is, Chess is 80% tactics, and if you are not practicing enough, you may

I many players have reached admirable heights in chess. By their interactions in our chat rooms, we know that these players are sharing a lot of insights and ideas to improve the game. These chat rooms are a treasure trove of information for any beginner, which is very helpful. We encourage our students to take advice from better chess players.

But here is a catch, no two players play alike, and we would still want you to encourage your natural game! Take advice from everyone, but whether you take it or leave it is up to you.

How should you seek advice then?

Instead of asking them what “they” did, ask them about their favorite chess book or whose game should you be analyzing.

8.  There are still ghosts lurking about – don’t be scared

Even after you have done everything to improve your game, there will always be certain weak areas, and it is only natural to be scared of losing or trading pieces at the wrong juncture. You may not have an attacking game at all, but in the end, remember that it’s not over till it’s over.

You must learn to stay calm and not be afraid of a threatening opponent with an upper hand. You have worked hard for it. Your losses may haunt you into the next game.

Now is the time to brace yourselves and not give up!

9.  Take care of your health and fitness

A healthy mind resides in a healthy body, and nutrition is essential for chess as for any other game. If you are not fit or have not been taking care of your health, it will reflect on your game. Well-known chess players are known to follow a strict diet and exercise regime that helps them focus better on their game. In a sedentary game like chess, it is equally important. 

10. Never, ever give up! Always work hard

You can't win if you give up!

......Keep on reading.....

[ihyperfixatedtoohard]

Hello! #6 for the TAD ask game?

Hello! Thank you for the ask! This is a good one, and one I can really only answer abstractly lol. I haven't experienced much loss in my life, which I'm thankful for, and what little loss I have experienced has yet to really be explored in TAD's songs. However, I'd say that Chords comes the closest to reminding me of someone I've lost. The person I've lost, though, is me. Me, and I suppose my family, who I left behind when I moved out. Everytime I listen to that song, I end up crying, because there's just so many things I relate to having recently moved to my own place. I miss my family, and I know they miss me, and there's also this whole dynamic of being glad to be gone from them because they were suffocating, but also missing that sense of normalcy. Missing seeing them everyday and knowing they would always be right there to help me. Anyway, yeah. I may not always see eye to eye with my family, but I really miss them most of the time. Thank you again for the ask. Have a wonderful day 💙💙💙

[fenyginda]

Had to share this @WeHeartIt

страна Испания длительность 1 ч 30 мин премьера: Мир $30 798 50523 августа 2022 премьера: США $67 5994 ноября 2022 онлайн: Мир 6 декабря 2022 студии производства Mediaset España Institut Català de les Empreses Culturals (ICEC) Telecinco Cinema ... другие названия Tadeo Jones 3. La maldición de la momia (Испания) Tad the Lost Explorer and The Curse of the Mummy (Великобритания) Tad the Lost Explorer and the Emerald Tablet (США)

Бывают такие люди, у которых доброе сердце и с головой на плечах, вроде, всё в порядке, но не везет им в жизни – они все время попадают в неловкие ситуации, проваливаются в люки, что-то поджигают и ведут себя то скованно, то неуклюже. Главный герой мультфильма по имени Тед – именно такой персонаж. Он посвятил свою жизнь исследованиям и путешествиям. У нашего героя веселая чудаковатая компания – замечательный пес Джефф, а также живая м��мия с невыносимым характером. Тед влюблен в умную и обворожительную Сару, которая воспринимает беднягу как друга! Однажды она отыскала удивительный папирус, в котором речь идет о местонахождении мистического ожерелья, обладающего уникальным даром – превращать в золото все, до чего дотронешься! Девушка устроила грандиозную презентацию, с которой была похищена на глазах у ошеломленной публики. За подлым злодеянием стоит гадкий миллионер Джек Рэкхем. Он любой ценой жаждет заполучить бесценный артефакт и не отпустит девушку, пока она не признается, как добраться до ожерелья Мидаса. Конечно, наш герой не может смириться со случившимся и отправляется в умопомрачительное путешествие, чтобы спасти любимую!

смотреть ☛ здесь

[hellman55]

Tad the Lost Explorer Walkthrough Part 6 (PS4, Switch, PC) 100% Egypt

[the-wandering-seeker]

This one gonna be a tad different from what we usually see, this is one of my worlds so all characters down will act different from either their canon lores or fanon harsh contents.

They are both related.

Brothers related actually.

This will be a sudden short story from my mind that runs on 6:14am, sky, my sky in-laws and my wife.

This will be a wholesome story for my wholesome little followers and those who need some break from reality at least, and ofc you who read and like this on tumblr! Or just like to read in general.

Cutting to the short end let’s begin before I hit my breaks.

After Minecraft became the so called popular game the one considered as god, Notch himself was thriving, not cause of all the population that spread like wild fire, well, maybe a little bit.

But he was even more overjoyed to spread around the fun of “actually creating things without having to involve so much material and mess in the real world called earth.”

It was mostly a way to escape the reality of how society been changing so frequently that he would feel left behind most of the times, with new words and abbreviations in words he would often get lost rather quickly than he liked to admit.

His brother, the one and only who were by his side ever since the beginning, always watching like a hawk, knowing how Notch would get carried away with patching notes and everything he often tended to skip quite a lot of meal and breaks.

For them it was normal living on a world of blocks, being able to build on their own and even live the life as whatever you though your mind and hands would result in to, laboratory? Farmer? Painter? World explorer? You could do anything the world allowed you to.

Hnngh….!! This one will be the biggest patch ever made… 78 and going up… again.

Notch wasn’t amused, the world is always filled with those parasite called bugs and viruses, not the normal bugs you see on grass, but bugs that would affect even the way you think to move your hand or even muscles correctly.

Ay big bro! Come check this one out!

Confused Notch went out only to flinch as a big pile of sand got dumped right in front of him, the backyard that was a empty space was completely flooded with sand from the beach, the beach itself wasn’t so far actually, within 20 to 47 steps you could already touch the warm soft sand with your barefoot.

Hero!? What’s all of this!? It’s a mess!

Not a mess if you call it… “art”~

I swear you and your upbringing hazards…

Heh, it’s me after all~

Herobrine now hopping down from the roof jumped straight in to the sand, chuckling as he looked at Notch with arms crossed and amused face.

…so, care to explain what’s all of this?

Oh you’ll see, come here first.

With such no care to the world that shown on the younger male’s face, Notch let out a sigh before followed to a smile, Herobrine was always up for a chaos but in a good way.

Herobrine, the little guiding hand of Notch.

That’s what he mainly was more than a little brother, he was a reliable family member and quite of a helper than others imagine.

All those bugs that Notch squash with the update is mainly those that Herobrine found, the way he found is by infiltrating on the worlds and test out new features and new items for any sort of misplaced codes or incompatible connections that could cause future problems.

This honestly was one of the reason why Minecraft spiked in popularity, one day the brothers did a usual routine except Herobrine entered the world of a player that already made the world it’s home.

By this accidental discover the person spread the words about Herobrine, at first Herobrine panicked and tried to stop the player but in the end it leaked out and with that more attention merged in, causing Minecraft itself to be a huge exploding success.

First you’ll need a shovel and we’ll, just dig around! I got plenty of buckets so it won’t be gone that easily.

You really know how to make a day fun don’t you?

Neither needs to say the brothers was the most inseparable duo, their life together was quite of a surprise despite how bad the reputations between siblings are for here and there folks.

The treasures are the best taste when found by blind eyes.

?

At first, Notch was completely clueless like anybody would be, something like that coming from no other than his own little brother.

Well, first time for everybody?

As they played in the sand they would find many things to add on a small collection, pretty rocks, unique shells, even surprising crab inside of it, well that one just snip snap on Herobrine’s finger which he flicked off in pain, ofc earning a good old laugh from the god.

A core memory to be remembered by both brothers of heart.

[animefreak1145]

The Brilliance of Break On Through

Call of Duty: Black Ops Cold War Mission Break on Through—An Analysis

I have replayed the campaign of COD:BOCW numerous times—too many times truly. Did a whole playthrough where it was Hardened and soon I’m sure I shall do Veteran(something I have never done for any COD game. Not even Hardened.).

All missions have their own unique qualities—parts where the player gets a little rush of adrenaline depending on the kind of mission and how they choose to play it (Nowhere Left to Run just a plain shooting match while Brick in the Wall you can choose to remain stealthy like the good spy you are or go crazy like an eager homicidal maniac).

Even within the safehouse, there are plenty of little details to discover if you take the time to look around and observe everyone. Or, everything. (The radio if turned to a Russian station/correspondence, Adler changes it back immediately before Da Nang mission. Watching Park’s body language, as you talk to Adler and she periodically looks over to you two. Adler suspicious when you go to the Red Room or the locked room with the arcade. The T.V. being turned on in the Red Room)

But the amount of details, details, in the mission Break on Through is outstanding. I have played this mission more than any other due to me wishing to look at all the details. There’s so many, I think I may miss some. And I can’t show them off all to you cause I suck at creating gifs and don’t know how to transfer that from Xbox to my phone.

To lighten it up a bit, I won’t focus on the four different scenarios you go through—at least not each one. That would take too long and I do not have gifs/pics to show it off since Tumblr limits it to ten anyways.

I will, however, try to guide to what parts of the game you all can explore if you choose to do so. As well just how detailed they did this mission.

I am going to start with the different statements Adler says to you throughout all the Scenarios(17, 6, 11, 1). We only go through four in the actual game—but the fact it goes up to 17 or possibly more shows just how far they went in and messed with Bell’s mind.

Now, Adler seems to be a bit bipolar on how he talks to you whether or not you listen to him and all his directions. Either totally blasé and cold to giving you and pumping you up with more MK or meds, or actually a tad concerned and patient as he guides you through.

If You/Bell Stands Still/Does Nothing:

Example 1

“So you did nothing? What were you, in shock?”

He throws the words callously, mocking. As if Bell isn’t confused and lost at what is going on. He even sounds irritated that you might actually be in shock due to these memories that are just fake—not even real. Not like what he has.

Example 2

“What’s wrong with Bell?” -Adler

“I’m not sure. . .” -Park

“I guess we’ll just wait on you to proceed, Bell.”

The contrast is dizzying. He sounds concerned when he asks Park on what could be wrong with you. If he pushed you too far and now you’re just frozen. And, instead of rushing you due to how the fate of half of Europe is at stake, he decides to give you space. Just wait for you and you’ll come out of it soon enough.

He does these sort of reactions numerous times. Jumping from intimidating to the Adler we knew as the player, as Bell—kind and always in your corner that believes in you. He switches tactics based on what he believes will work really—or he just felt really on edge at times and threw the farce that you two were friends out the window.

Other examples include:

Scenario 11–Napalm Strike-in the lab in the room where you were brainwashed

“Christ, what’s happening with them?”-Adler

“A mild seizure. Sims, past me a benzodiazepine.” -Park

Again, concerned. Worried. Almost…at unease?

In the lab—tripped up on drugs. If you run through the tight shrinking hallway back and forth like so(I suck at making gifs, I’m sorry):

“Why is Bell repeating themselves?”

Or

“Bell, stop speaking in circles.”

Now, as others may have suspected, Bell is talking to everyone as they’re stuck in this horrible loop of mental torture. Most likely muttering, hands clenching and arms pulling against the straps of the gurney, moving their head back and forth depending on what they’re seeing. I always saw Bell as muttering quickly in Russian as they go through all of this—their mother tongue where it may comfort them as they’re panicking and speaking to Adler.

It’s just a nice detail showcasing how exactly Adler knows that Bell is on script—Bell saying what they’re seeing and doing and what’s going on. It shows also just how hard they put Bell through the ringer(badum tss. I’ll leave now).

All the details too when the game shows how the drugs they put in Bell affects you. Like so. The hallways appearing long. The lights looking yellow. You feel so fast—look how quick you can run. Run towards the Red Door that Adler so desperately wants and maybe this can stop. Ah, why is it running away from you? What’s going on?

I don’t know about you, but I was so lost and confused at what was going on my first playthrough. For the majority of this mission, the possibility of me being brainwashed didn’t reach the BACK of my mind till probably I actually saw the flashes of scenes about Vietnam and calling Bell a subject. So like right here.

I personally thought that I had a repressed memory or something due to me going through the Vietnam War. That whatever I saw with Perseus, I—or rather Bell—repressed it from our mind due to how violent or horrible what we saw or experienced was. And that Adler suspected and just really wanted to know about it.

I didn’t expect for the man to actually brainwash my character—us—Bell! The game made Adler your mentor, who always defended you from Hudson and believed in your skills very highly. How he and Bell were basically perfect partners when the two of you were together.

It’s amazing—cause I think that’s what the developers were going for. The absolute trust. The loyalty. The denial that ‘maybe Adler is being a little harsh but hey, this is to help Perseus so it’s okay?’ It’s perfect. Because I’m sure that is what Bell actually felt in real time.

Yet, if you go through the total rebellious choice of not listening to Adler, some thing’s make sense. The Rebellious Side shows you way more than if you just listen to Adler like a Dutiful Soldier.

You go through this room if you choose the rebellious route, the T.V.’s automatically turning on the closer you get. Of Vietnam. And now, all those T.V.‘s that turned on by themselves(the Red Room, Lubyanka, Cuba) make sense. You were actually being brainwashed. Poor Bell probably can’t ever have a turned off/broken T.V. again. The trauma.

Said trauma being shown multiple times too. Not just the T.V.‘s. But the absolute terror that Bell felt, before they became Bell, with Adler.

Like do you see this? This terrified me when I saw it at the end of the hallway. I just saw a red shadow in the distance and I legit thought I was about to be chased. Call of Duty became a horror game(I also went through the door to the ground too my first playthrough, so before this I went through zombies and I think my heart was going to jump out my chest) I thought. I didn’t want to get closer. I had to, with each step I see that it’s not a shadow but a body. And than I see the familiar jacket, the sound of whirring in my ears and see it’s Adler’s head being twisted back and forth, side to side, up and down, in a speed that in inhumanely possible.

Makes one wonder if Bell themselves sees Adler as inhumane. Not human. Adler seeming to just be a god in their head. All the Adler shaped rocks/boulders you go through and see. Even one point the V.C. becoming Adler and you killing him over and over and dead bodies of Adler being everywhere.

The man has entered Bell’s head and won’t leave. Just like Adler won’t leave Bell alone.

Heck, there’s one point in my playthroughs of this mission I was by the bridge yet there were parts of the lab by it. I jumped towards it, noticing down below there were different floors of the lab that eventually reach the ground. I jumped to reach the next floor and missed and I died.

And Adler mocked Bell committing suicide.

That was the kicker really that Adler truly is indifferent towards Bell. Like complete disregard. I know it’s fake. We know it’s fake. Adler knows it’s fake—but to Bell, it felt real. That’s the crazy part. All of this—this whole sequence feels real to Bell so each time they die they actually feel it. It’s insane. It’s cruel.

But we all know that Adler isn’t known for his kindness. Still like his character though, he’s layered.

I don’t have the exact quote he said, didn’t wrote it down like the others. I was shook he said it at all.

Moving on to the final details I’m going to talk about.

When you go through the room, I believe this comes out for both rebellious and dutiful, really depends. You see it filled with post it notes, articles, plans, and newspapers. And you see once more just how Bell has been scarred.

I don’t know Russian or German, but I imagine the notes are similar to what the English one’s say. If I’m wrong, please point it out.

There’s also post it notes which I believe is in code as well due to all the numbers—I’m not sure what those could mean since I am no decoding expert.

Poor poor Bell. And with all these pictures and plans—of Adler included—it begs the question that Bell may have been warned about the famous America’s Monster beforehand. Had to have—since Adler is basically Perseus’s adversary due to how stubborn the American man could be. It just adds more to the story, despite Cold War having quite a short campaign, they made it up somewhat with all these details everywhere.

When you finally and actually reach the room.

As you grow closer to the table, to your chair in the conference room while everyone else seems to have their own spots, there’s something I noticed.

There’s glasses. As well as a hat. And it’s Bell’s. Or at least, it used to be. Why else is it on their side of the table? By their chair? I believe it might be reading glasses due to all the decryptions Bell does, whether on paper or through a computer, it’s hard on the eyes. (I’m sure I’m not the only one who noticed this. For look at @second-vtoroy ‘s Bell)

I believe through the brainwashing, Bell might not need glasses anymore. After all, apparently they were a smoker like Adler before too but they took that out of you. What else they changed of Bell? It makes one wonder how far they truly went into molding a person.

Which just adds onto how mind boggling this mission is—this game is. This is my favorite COD game, despite how short it is. The details and choices and interactions with everyone and able to create your own character(albeit it’s very standard and not specific but it’s good enough for me) is AMAZING. I’ve always been a sucker for RPG’s and able to get that even a little in a COD game? Truly wonderful.

I couldn’t touch on everything because it would’ve gotten long, but the fun of the Break on Through mission never gets old. It’s genius multiple ways you can do it. All the details. The feelings you feel as a player as you go through it.

They truly did a unique job with this and I hope they continue with this type of game storytelling. Hopefully longer as well.

Anyways, hope you guys enjoyed this rant basically!

Gifs made by me and used the video down below to help.

https://youtu.be/t6QkmkGGHSQ