#tav: darcy

[mythrae-writes]

Killing Me Softly

Rugan/Darcy (Tav) | 3.1k words | 18+/mdni

huge s/o to @my-favourite-zhent and @fistfuloftarenths for beta reading and just helping me get the words I wanna write out of my mouth!

Chapter One: Stranger To My Eye

After a run-in with the Zhentarim, Darcy realizes that her actions have dire consequences.

Darcy thought making her way through the Risen Road would be easy. Couple of tough creatures here and there, but the loot would be worth it, and her party could head towards Moonrise Towers with ease. 

Boy, was she wrong.

Standing in gnoll and hyena guts, she silently prayed to no particular god that none of the other members of the pack were still alive. She highly doubted it, though. The gnoll leader herself was slaughtering her own kind before she ultimately ended herself, thanks to the tadpoles they had in their brains. Thankfully, the only sounds Darcy heard were from her own companions, recovering from the fight. It wasn’t an easy one, and she knew they’d need to take a short rest soon.

“Astarion, what are you whining about now?” Shadowheart groaned, rolling her eyes as she reached out to the vampire with a healing spell.

“Ugh!” He cried out, “Darcy just got me these boots and now they’re absolutely soaked in gnoll blood.”

“I would’ve thought you’d enjoy that.”

“Not if the blood's old or staining my clothes!”

“The river’s just south from here.” Karlach pointed, “Want to go wash them off real quick?”

“I think we all need a good wash.” Darcy looked at herself, blood splattered all over her clothes. “We’re looking pretty rough.”

But before she could take a step further, she heard a man’s rugged voice calling to her from the cavern.

“By the Gods!” He shouted, a wave of relief lingering in his voice, “You’re a sweet sight.”

Darcy turned around to face him, the gnoll guts squelching under her boots as her hand instinctively grabbed for her bow and pulled it taut, arrow nocked and ready to be released. She feared that another enemy had approached their party, someone who wanted to take advantage of them while they were still licking their wounds.

But as the man fully came into view, she was pleasantly surprised.

Very pleasantly surprised.

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Read Chapter 2 here!

Click here to read the rest on AO3! :)

[voloslobotomyservice]

me waking up in the middle of the night trying to remember if I turned off the stove

[dutifullylazybread]

Headcannon jealous Rolan

Rolan and Tav have an established relationship

However, Rolan is jealous of Gale. I need to know how this man handles jealousy and Gale around Tav. NSFW or SFW.

So I ended up writing a bit of a scenario while also giving an idea of how Rolan acts while he is jealous. Some mentions of sex below, but nothing overtly NSFW. I'd argue this is more of a hurt/comfort headcanon list.

As a note, I focused on why Rolan might be jealous of the relationship between Tav/Gale to keep this as concise as I could. I think it is possible that Rolan might be jealous of Gale's magical education, but that might be a headcanon list for another time!

Some Reasons Why Rolan is Jealous of Gale and How He Acts:

Rolan knows that you and Gale are close—the two of you traveled together for months after all. You have pulled each other from the jaws of death on countless occasions. You convinced him not to detonate the orb that once sat in his chest.

Gale has a deeper understanding of what you went through at that time than Rolan thinks he ever will. After all, Rolan never had a tadpole lodged in his skull, nor has he ever shared a mental link with you. And while his path to Baldur’s Gate took him one way, your path took you the other—even with the points in which both routes merged.

And the bastard is just charming. He makes it look so easy to be that damn charming.

And when Rolan feels at ease, he is charming. But he feels like he has to put on a performance. He has to be this brilliant wizard at all times.

Rolan may feel like he knows you well—you and him are in an established relationship. The two of you have professed your love for each other. You sleep in the same bed, you have shared goals for the future, and he could see himself spending the rest of his life with you.

But does he know you as well as Gale does?

That eats at him.

And he does feel like he is at a disadvantage when Gale comes to visit, and the two of you reminisce about something that Rolan wasn’t present for. 

He watches how you light up and laugh, and he wonders if you ever light up like that around him. He tells himself that it might be different, that he might not notice those little details, because he sees you every single day.

You and Gale may discuss a book that Rolan has never read, or you might ramble on about your research and ask for the other’s opinion.

After traveling together and patching each other’s wounds, you and Gale might casually touch (arm squeezes or hugs, for example) with ease. And it might make Rolan uneasy.

Rolan’s response to the situation will vary.

If he feels left out, he might excuse himself and make himself scarce. You can tell something is wrong based on how his tail is snapping back and forth. He is seething and trying to hide it.

He is also being awfully short with you. He might make a few passive aggressive (or as passive aggressive as he can manage) comments.

“Don’t mind me. I wouldn’t want to take you away from such engaging company.” He says this with a distinct bite, of course.

If he isn't too deep into his jealousy, he will definitely take comfort in the two of you having sex. You make him feel loved and valued, and you take the time to remind him of that.

And while he is feeling this way, slow and tender sex is the way to go. The sex where it feels like the two of you have nothing but time and you plan on using all of that time with him is soothing.

If he has gotten to the point where he is being short and standoffish, however, sex isn't happening. He is closing himself off from everyone in nearly every conceivable way.

If Gale tries to talk to him, Rolan is cordial but chilly. 

He won’t outright ask for Gale to leave, but he doesn’t go out of his way to make him feel welcome either.

He is, after all, trying to appear every inch the archwizard who could rival Gale. And in several ways, he already is. He just doesn’t see it.

While Rolan doesn’t necessarily try to one-up Gale, he will have those small, ugly moments of feeling rather pleased with himself when he is more knowledgeable about something than Gale might be.

Rolan might make small jabs at Gale about knowing something that he perceives as easy but which Gale mentions having difficulty with (it just feels satisfying to know he can do something better than Gale).

When Gale is about, Rolan might make a conscious point to curl his tail around your ankle or to lay a hand on the small of your back—physical contact that he might not normally indulge in when company is around.

I don’t see him making a point of kissing you in front of Gale or doing something like pulling you onto his lap—the small moments of contact, though Gale might not be picking up on it, speak volumes already.

Should Rolan not be forthcoming with Gale about how he feels, Gale will likely say something to you along the lines of, “Have I done something to upset Rolan?”

Naturally, you don’t want to see your beloved and one of your dear friends at odds.

So, privately, you ask Rolan what the matter is.

This is another situation where he might claim nothing at all is wrong, or he might make a snide remark about Gale. He might loop you into that comment.

“I wouldn’t want to interrupt the two of you. You were getting rather chummy after all.”

The direction this discussion goes will largely depend on how insecure Rolan feels and how defensive he gets. 

It might be as easy as reminding him that you chose him. You have built a life with him. And you wouldn’t change what you have for anything.

If Rolan is too defensive to be receptive, he might put some space between you and him so that he can feel what he needs to feel and then gather his thoughts. He likely won’t be graceful about it (he will probably lock himself up in his office and stew for a bit).

However, when he does have the time to really consider everything, he does see that he has been unfair and downright unkind.

And while he doesn’t enjoy the idea of the conversation to come, he does want to make amends with you. And he wants to explain himself.

This isn’t to say that he won’t get defensive during this discussion either, but with his newfound clarity, he is going to try his damnedest to hear what you have to say and recognize how his actions have made you feel.

Gale and you are just friends. Even if the two of you were romantic in the past, things ended amicably, and neither of you have any interest in picking up where things left off.

Besides, you might ask Rolan, have you ever done anything to make him think that your affections were wandering?

Rolan will assure you that you haven’t. And then it may come out that he is jealous of the closeness that you and Gale have, and sometimes it does sting to know that he hasn’t shared in those adventures.

So you offer to tell him everything that he wants to know. What is he curious about? 

Does he want to know where you all traveled? Does he want to know about the moments where all of you laughed yourselves dizzy around the fire? About the disagreements that you had but then talked out and patched up? How about the most horrific meals you had to scrounge together? 

And this helps him a bit. He might not get to have those experiences with you, but it means the world to him that you are happy to share those times with him—that you feel comfortable enough to do so. 

Even if you don’t want to share everything—if a companion died on the road, if something went horribly wrong—even offering to tell him about some of your adventures means a great deal to him.

Rolan apologizes to you and promises to make amends with Gale.

And when you, him, and Gale are visiting once again, you encourage Rolan to ask questions—Gale is always more than happy to regale anyone with stories of your adventures, after all. 

And, though he does have to swallow his pride a little, Rolan does apologize to Gale.

He asks Gale to visit again—and Gale accepts (Waterdeep is lovely, but Baldur’s Gate is still the third best city on the Sword Coast, after all).

And later, you remind Rolan just how much he means to you, and how incredible you think he is.

I’m saying you body worship and overstim him, and then you hold him while he falls asleep in your arms, feeling loved and cherished and secure.

A week later, when you and Rolan are spending a lazy morning in bed together, you laugh at something he says. And he realizes that, around him, when you light up, you are practically incandescent

And he holds you close.

[mmothmanners]

It's V-Day and you know what that means?

A screenshot redraw of one of my favourite moments of Pride & Prejudice (jk the whole movie is my favourite).

I had to draw Ris'daer quoting the confession scene.

[demigoddessqueens]

Rolan the type to say something like this to Tav

[ollypopwrites]

Like 5k into this Rolan fic and I realize we gotta split this thing up

I thought Gale was great yearning matierial this dude right here????

I have plans that I cannot share with you right now because the haters will sabotage me

[jin-in-faerun]

Just saw a TikTok of a Cameo that someone has requested of George Taylor (Roland’s VA) doing a reaction to a love confession in character. It was the cutest thing ever. Like he’s so adorable and sweet. Had me like:

Like it gave me an idea for Tav right before dealing with the end game shit, dropping a confession off at the towers for Rolan. He’s busy with work and sorta dismiss Tav or they sneakily drop it off and he doesn’t read it until later and is all the chaos going around he’s terrified for them as he realizes his feelings and theirs.

Tav comes back all battered and bruised and he’s rushes up them all concerned checking them all over and gently scolding them as he slips out:

“How can the one I love so much be so reckless and brave?”

And Tav is like, “You love me, too?”

“Always my darling.”

Gah why isn’t he a romance option, Larian!? He can be such a Mr Darcy and I love it.

[an-excellent-choice]

So a piece of beautiful art and au of Gale being Mr. Darcy (by my-maehem & sammakesart) is circulating and the first thing that popped in my mind is Mr. Knightley from Emma (2020).

I specifically have the scolding and confession scene fitting Gale.

I don't know why but when Gale gets angry, it hits different. He rarely gets angry and tries to brush most insults aside but imagining him admonishing Tav about Tav's cruelty to someone is gut wrenching for me. I can fully understand Emma's sorrow in disappointing Mr. Knightley if Gale is so disappointed in me and I get scolded by him.

While the confession scene, Imagine Gale being so overwhelmed by emotion and saying "If I loved you less then I might be able to talk about it more".

And it kinda tracks with Gale's confession when he was overcome by emotions he just blurts out he's in love with Tav rather than his usual yappy(endearment) self

[katsitsiyo]

Here’s a piece of Rolan and (one of) my (many) tav(s), Yenonhsará:se, that I comm’d @teaandtapestry again to make for me! Just the two of them being all cute and having a lil love confession inside Ramazith’s Tower. 🤭🤭

Rolan’s storyline is one of my favorite in the game. My sad boi Mr. Darcy-coded wizard. 🥺 He’s so loyal to his family and has such big dreams. He deserves the world after all he’s had to go through. 😩💔

This game is just filled with precious babies I want to hold and protect. 🥹🩷🤲

[mythrae-writes]

A Matter of Trust

Shadowheart/Darcy (OC) | 2.0k words | 18+/MDNI

huge thank you to @grandmother-goblin for beta-reading this for me <3

After Darcy's deepest secret is revealed one night at camp, Shadowheart wants to show her that her companions are worth trusting.

“So… you’re not actually a half-elf?”

“No, Astarion, I’m not.”

Darcy stood in front of her party members, arms crossed and tail twitching. She knew she wouldn’t be able to hide her secret for long, but she didn’t think they’d find out this way.

Or that Astarion , of all people, would be the one to find out.

It was innocent enough — he was just checking up on her as her cries of terror rang throughout the night sky. Understandable. She could have been screaming for a hundred different reasons. She could have been attacked by a wild creature, finally feeling the effects of ceremorphosis, or just having a mental breakdown.

But he could have at least warned her before barging in on her half naked, tail fully exposed.

And he didn’t have to scream so godsdamned loudly about it, either.

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Click to read the rest on AO3!

[voloslobotomyservice]

thank u for the tag @dutifullylazybread that is so slay of u to think of me 🫶🏻💕

(figured I’d go with Darcy bc you guys share the same name 🤠)

NAME: Darcy

NICKNAME: Love/Lass (Rugan), Dark-and-Stormy/Soldier (Karlach), Darling (Astarion)

GENDER: cis female (she/her)

STAR SIGN: Aries-Taurus Cusp (18th of April/Tarsakh)

HEIGHT: 5’6 (5’9 if you count her horns)

ORIENTATION: pansexual

NATIONALITY/ETHNICITY: (half) tiefling from Elturel

FAVORITE FRUIT: prickly pear

FAVORITE SEASON: Fall/Autumn, specifically late autumn

FAVORITE FLOWER: fireblossom

FAVORITE SCENTS: prefers fresh, clean scents, like bergamot, mint, or light citrus

COFFEE/TEA/HOT CHOCOLATE: hot choccy all the way, she doesn’t like bitter or earthy flavors much

AVERAGE HOURS OF SLEEP: probably 4-6, depending on how bad her nightmares are

DOGS OR CATS: both, but she’d probably bring home a cat over a dog bc they’re easier to care for (in her opinion)

DREAM TRIP: as depressing as it sounds, her true dream trip would be to go back to Elturel to see her family once again. or she’d like to go somewhere in south Faerûn, where it’s warm all year round

NUMBER OF BLANKETS: has to be at least 2, no more than 5

RANDOM FACT(S):

Darcy is the eldest of six siblings

She started an apprenticeship at Bonecloak’s Apothecary before going missing from the Nautiloid

To hide her tail from other Baldurians, she’d wrap it around her leg inside her pants

When she first met her party, she told them that she was a half-elf to hide her identity

She and Astarion had met before… unknowingly, on her part

Currently simping over Rugan (until she finds out some pretty damning things about the man)

Hmmm tagging @fistfuloftarenths @haarleps @littleplasticrat 💕

[dutifullylazybread]

THIS IS MY OFFICIAL REQUEST FOR CAL REALIZING HE'S GOT A CRUSH ON YOU AND CONFESSING HIS FEELINGS HEADCANNONS. LIKE ALL PRE-RELATIONSHIP ACTIVITY. I need to feed the brain-rot

I'M WEAK AND I'M POSTING A DAY EARLY

I HAVE SO MANY IDEAS

(I did take some liberties with this list—this list assumes that Cal, Lia, and Rolan stay with the tiefling refugees and all necessary steps are taken to get the three of them safely from the Druid’s Grove to Baldur’s Gate).

I ended up breaking this into two parts—one that talks about how Cal's feelings develop leading into the relationship/confession, and the other part which is a bit more scenario-driven (and it ended up being pre-relationship stuff that led into the start of the relationship itself).

General Headcanons

Cal begins to think that he might like you as more than a friend around the time that he realizes that he always hopes to run into you while out and about. Not in a “Oh, we’re both in the same place at the same time” sort of way but more in a “I hope Tav is there. That'd be nice. Maybe I should invite them?”

He has absolutely hoped to stumble into friends before, but he wasn't too bothered if it didn't happen.

You, however? If you aren't at a gathering, he feels poorer for it.

And when you two spend time together (be this in a group setting or on your own), he’s always stealing glances your way… and he realizes he doesn’t really do that with anyone else.

When someone tells a joke that he finds funny, he looks at you to see if you’re laughing as well. Every time.

He takes every opportunity to be near you. 

Even if you’re just running errands or doing something boring, he is over the moon to be invited along—even if you assure him that he doesn’t have to. His company is always welcome, but you wouldn’t be upset if he chose to go do something more enjoyable. 

“It’s no bother. The work is easier when there are two people to do it.”

If he goes shopping and sees something that reminds him of you, he will get it for you.

If you offhandedly mention that you like a certain type of food, don’t be surprised if he makes it for you. 

And if you ask him what the occasion was, he’ll shrug and say, “No reason,” or possibly, “It sounded like you haven’t had  it in a while.”

Cal strikes me as a very physically affectionate person; so long as you’re okay with hugs, he will embrace you when the two of you meet up and when the two of you part.

Though he does enjoy spontaneous hugs too.

And he does like holding your hand. A lot. 

He is the type of person who will check in to see if you need a drink refill or more food. It’s one way that he likes to take care of you, but he initially doesn’t think much of it, because he would do that for his siblings too.

And while Cal is fairly good at coming to his own conclusions about how he feels, Lia and Rolan most certainly tease him about how he acts around you.

Initially though, he thinks he is just being a good friend. 

Until he hugs you one day, and the hug lasts a moment longer than normal. And he notices how you feel pressed against him.

He realizes that it feels really, really natural to hold you close.

And you smell really, really nice. 

He realizes that you have always smelled that way. He has definitely picked up on it before, but for whatever reason, this time it really sticks.

This isn't a scent kink so much as it's a “I am taking comfort in something that is so utterly familiar and perfectly you” moment.

And then he starts to notice other things.

He likes the sound of your laugh. A lot. 

He particularly likes when he can get you to laugh, because you will look at him, eyes bright and face flushed.

And then there is a moment where your eyes meet, and you hold his gaze, and everything clicks into place.

And if he hadn't already figured out that he has a crush on you, he absolutely does then.

Rolan and Lia point out that it seems like he is daydreaming A LOT lately. And while he might be dismissive of this at first, it doesn’t take long for him to put two and two together—he’s thinking of you a lot.

And he is also talking about you much more often. Sometimes he repeats the same stories about you because, honestly, everything reminds him of you.

Rolan and Lia will tell him that he is repeating himself, but he just looks so happy whenever he talks about you.

So they'll usually wait for a pause in his story to lovingly tease him.

While Cal has always enjoyed hugging you before, he is melting into your embrace now. He is constantly looking for excuses to be close to you, to brush his arm against yours.

If he gets too flustered, his laugh raises in pitch and he'll slosh the drink he's holding all over himself.

To make matters worse, you think he's cute when he gets so worked up, and that's enough to make him light headed.

He doesn't strike me as someone who worries over saying the right thing. He isn't agonizing over every sentence, but he makes an effort to be kind. And if he is kind and transparent with people, then everything will be fine and any misunderstandings can, hopefully, be smoothed over.

But around the point that he starts to notice all these things that he likes about you, he starts to really worry about what he says and what you might infer.

Part of me thinks that, if Cal gets really deep into his stress over his crush for you, he becomes a nervous, giggling mess of a person.

This is to the point where he cannot have a discussion with you, because he is so nervous about what he will say.

“This person is incredible. I adore them so much. Oh, Hells, they're looking at me. Oh, Hells, they're gorgeous. OH, HELLS, THEY'RE COMING OVER TO SAY HELLO.”

Cal is clumsy, but when he is flustered, he practically trips over himself.

Will drop anything and everything when you are in close proximity.

Spills drinks and food everywhere because he gets caught up watching you laugh at a joke.

Will have bruises on his thighs, knees, and calves from how often he runs into furniture around you/when he is thinking of you. 

If Cal gets to this point, Rolan and Lia might intervene. They won't speak for their brother, but they will encourage/beg/urge him to talk to you. 

Their persistence will depend on how much Cal is agonizing over things. If he's just quietly pining but is content to spend time with you and it doesn't appear that he is struggling, they'll tease him.

If it's to the point where he is overanalyzing everything he says, they're going to be a lot firmer on him communicating his feelings to you.

“I think I made Tav uncomfortable.”

“Cal, you completely froze up and wouldn't make eye contact with them. They probably think that they're making you uncomfortable. For all of our sakes, just talk to them.”

So, Cal gathers his courage and asks you to go on an outing with him—something the two of you would do regardless of if you were a couple.

He will be nervous. He will be dropping things and bumping into the edges of furniture.

But here's the kicker: if you are nervous, blushing, and generally flustered about being around him, then his nerves will settle a little. Because he has had to be the calm, steady one for his siblings. It's in his nature to be there for others when they are struggling.

So you're both nervous. And you're both stumbling over yourselves.

It becomes a question of which one of you manages to confess first, but for the sake of this list, we'll say Cal manages as you were working up the courage.

And when you reciprocate his feelings and tell him how much you adore him, he looks fit to pass out from how relieved he is.

Your first kiss is clumsy—he bumps your forehead with his and his teeth click against yours. 

But it's honestly perfect.

If you are the calmer of the two, Cal will definitely take comfort in that as well.

“This is Tav. I trust them. They are an incredible person. They have never made me feel like I can't confide in them.”

So he works up the courage and confesses. He wants more than friendship with you. He likes you a lot. He might even be in love with you. He wants to find out.

And he hugs you so, so tightly when you confess that you feel the same.

We're talking a hug so tight and so close that, regardless of how tall you are, your feet are dangling off of the ground as he holds you to him.

Your first kiss is clumsy regardless. But it's perfect, because all your nerves and anxieties melt away in that moment.

And it’s just the two of you. And a world of possibilities has opened up before you.

Scenario-driven Headcanons: Following Game Events - Basically if Cal was a Romanceable NPC - From Crush to The Beginnings of A Relationship

So, personally, I think that Cal likely wouldn’t be considering a relationship while he and his family are fleeing from Elturel to Baldur’s Gate. It’s not that he is opposed to one—he’s just in survival mode. Not only that, but he is also pulling double shifts as Rolan’s and Lia’s mediator. The more time the three of them are on the road, the more his siblings are prone to argue. That just comes with the stress of being exiled from your home and dealing with food shortages and exhaustion. Both siblings have strong personalities and opinions on what matters (Rolan wants to ensure the safety of the three of them; Lia wants to ensure the safety of everyone), so if both have the energy, they’re going to argue. 

In the druid’s grove, the stress is at an all time high. Any day now, they could be turned out by the druids—who would effectively seal the grove off with the Rite of Thorns. And from there, who is to say that the goblins won’t attack? They might be small, but they have the numbers, the weapons, and control of the road. 

And if the goblins won’t get them, what else will they have to contend with?

First impressions are fleeting when you walk into the grove—Cal can’t get a good gauge on your character then.

Though he wasn’t terribly keen on Rolan and Lia arguing in front of everyone, he did appreciate that you diffused the situation… for the moment. 

And at the party? The first time he and his siblings allow themselves to relax, to forget the road ahead for the night, he starts to notice little things about you.

But just because he isn’t considering a relationship doesn’t mean he isn’t developing feelings—he just might not be paying them as much heed as he may if the situation were different.

Things that he might not usually observe with people—the way the corners of your eyes lift up when you smile, for example.

He most certainly likes hearing you laugh. He would like to hear you laugh more.

And when Rolan casts prestidigitation and lights the night sky, Cal finds his attention pulled away from the magic show to you. Your eyes are bright and you are set aglow.

And he finds you enchanting.

When you first walked into the grove, you carried yourself like any scrappy adventurer might. 

But at the party? Out of your fighting gear and not toting around a weapon? You’re… softer. Perhaps not quite as guarded as you would be on the road, waiting for some enemy to barrel out of the brush and attack you.

And he likes that.

And he starts to gravitate to you.

Though he doesn't think much of it, he will check in and see if you need your wine topped off or if you need something to eat. He figures he's looking out for you, perhaps thanking you for helping him and his family.

And you rather like how pleasant Cal is. He’s a breath of fresh air. Beyond getting to chat with you, getting to know you a bit better, he doesn’t seem to have any ulterior motives.

And you like talking to him. He seems to feel the same.

Rolan and Lia most definitely notice. And they will tease him relentlessly.

“You’re practically hanging off of every word they say, aren’t you? I don’t think you left their side for more than a few minutes tonight.”

And it's true. They're just stating the obvious. But they're teasing him. They seem to think he feels more than just friendly towards you.

He's torn between dismissing them out of pocket and considering what they have to say. Rolan and Lia may tease him, but they also have his best interests in mind. 

Because he really, really, likes when you look at him.

And when the two of you part ways for the evening, he does watch you walk away to join your companions.

He definitely lays awake that night replaying your interactions. He gets giddy over the ones that went well, and he cringes and curls in on himself over the moments where he was less than debonair.

While the tiefling refugees travel through the mountain pass, he daydreams about what it would be like if your traveling party and his didn't separate. What if you stayed with them?

How many more interactions could the two of you have had? 

He sees mountain flowers or a blue jay's feather, and he thinks about how, if you were traveling with them, he'd give those to you. He hopes that you would light up, but he would still get an idea of what you liked from your responses.

And then he thinks about how, at the end of the celebration, he said “until Baldur's Gate.” And he starts to think about how much he'd love to explore the city with you.

If you're from Baldur's Gate originally, maybe the two of you got to talking about some of your favorite places. You might have offered to show him around.

And you did suggest getting a pint or two at the Elfsong together. It's a nice enough place.

He makes a note to take you up on that offer.

The mountain pass is a long trek, but he doesn't really notice. His head is in the clouds.

Lia and Rolan tease him over how besotted he is, but it is nice to see him thinking about something other than survival.

And then they cross into the Shadow-Cursed Lands, and the cultists attack. Cal and Lia are separated from Rolan and taken to Moonrise.

Cal is mad at himself for indulging in those daydreams. Maybe he would have noticed the cultists sooner, had his mind been more present.

Every time he thinks about you in that dungeon, he does so with a twinge of shame. 

He doesn't go so far as to fantasize that you'll save him. The situation feels too hopeless. He and Lia mostly talk about Rolan and how they hope he didn't get hurt during the cultists’ ambush.

So when you walk down into the dungeon, traveling companions in tow, he's not sure if he believes his eyes.

Everything that happens next is a blur of activity. One moment, the cell Cal is in has a back wall. The next? It's gone and the path to freedom stretches out before him.

Between escaping the prison and getting onto the boat, he doesn't have the time to think.

When the Last Light Inn is in view, when you tell him Rolan is waiting for him and Lia, that is when everything snaps back into focus.

And when the Harpers check him for a tadpole and nothing happens, he breathes a sigh of relief.

Only for the tadpole to react to you when you approach.

And he panics.

You? You have one of those things in your skull? What does that mean for you? Does it hurt? Is it changing you?

You don't have all the answers either. And that makes matters worse.

He promises to do everything he can to find a cure… He isn't sure what he can do, but he has to do something.

And, once things have settled with Rolan and the inn quiets down for the night (or the closest semblance of night that there is in the Shadow-Cursed Lands) they talk.

Rolan promises to ask Lorroakan if Cal can read through the library in Ramazith's Tower. A wizard, of all people, should know something about ceremorphosis… right?

Should you talk to Cal before you leave for Moonrise again, he will urge you to fight against the tadpole—to not give in. He promises to help however he can, even if all he can manage is to patch your wounds.

And, so long as you are comfortable, he'll hug you. 

He doesn't want to let you go. For a moment, he doesn't think he can.

Because this amazing person, this individual who has saved his life twice and has reunited his family, well, they might die a gruesome death.

And that terrifies him.

But you survive the fight with Ketheric. And as you and your companions gather in Moonrise's throne room, Cal feels at ease. For the moment. 

And he is torn. He wishes that you would travel with them to the city, but he knows that a smaller group will move faster.

Should you speak with him after the battle, he will end your conversation the way he did at the celebration in Act 1.

“Until Baldur's Gate.”

And, should you be so inclined, you could leave him with a kiss on the cheek. He’ll smile bashfully.

“Well, I really hope that there will be more where that came from.”

When he and his siblings arrive in Rivington, they try to cross Wyrm’s Crossing together.

Only Rolan is allowed to pass through Wyrm’s Rock Fortress and into the lower city. He promises to send for them soon. They just need to hold tight and wait in the refugee camp.

But time passes and the communication from Rolan is sparse. So sparse that the two of them are beginning to panic. Rolan would never leave them in the lurch like this. Not unless something was truly wrong. They make plans. There must be other means of entering the city.

And, eventually, you and your companions arrive.

And you're alive. And he holds you close, feeling your heartbeat resonate in his chest.

But he's also frustrated. He hasn't managed to find anything that might cure your ceremorphosis. And now, he and Lia are asking you to look for Rolan. 

He asks you to be careful. He says he feels helpless because he can't cross into the city. 

And watching you head towards Wyrm’s Crossing has him gutted. You’ll likely end up walking into danger, but was he the one who sent you straight into it with his ask?

The days in the camp were miserable to begin with. No one is happy, and the people who live in Rivington are hostile to the refugees. Time drags on.

Cal now has three people to worry about—Rolan, Lia, and you.

Are you and Rolan alive? Did Rolan make it to his apprenticeship? Did you turn into a mind flayer?

And then, a few days later, Rolan sends a letter. 

He asks that Cal and Lia join him at Ramazith’s Tower. For good. They have a home now.

Cal and Lia pass by the Steel Watch and the Flaming Fist patrolling the crossing without incident.

And when they arrive at Ramazith's tower, they find their brother bruised and bloodied, but calm—relieved even.

And after the nerves of the road have settled, after they've cared for Rolan's injuries, and they are sitting in the tower’s study, Cal asks after you.

Rolan keeps the details vague, but he makes it perfectly clear that, were it not for you and your companions, the three of them wouldn't be sitting in that tower. No, if anything, Lorroakan wouldn't have lifted so much as a finger to help Cal and Lia pass into the city.

At this point, Rolan and Lia will gently tease Cal about his feelings for you.

“Well, they certainly know how to stick their nose into other people’s business, but they're tolerable enough. Invite them to dinner sometime.”

It isn't long before Cal is digging through the library, searching for books on Ceremorphosis.

Personally, I think he visits the Society of Brilliance per the suggestion of a shop patron.

And, when he gets there and the society sees how sincere Cal is, they introduce him to Omeluum.

These two hit it off, by the way.

Cal splits his work between reading through massive tomes and talking with Omeluum and Blurg.

He learns more about what it means to be a mind flayer. And he feels that, even if you were to transform, he’d want to be there to support you in whatever way he could.

And then, one day, as he is taking a break and cleaning the tower's study, you step through the portal.

He's speechless. He had realized back at Moonrise that his feelings for you extended beyond friendship, but to see you here? Now?

Rolan and Lia quietly excuse themselves while you two catch up.

You chat with him in the study, but eventually, Cal will ask for you to walk the balcony outside with him.

He is nervous. 

How does he begin to thank you for everything that you have done for him and his family? How does he begin to apologize for not finding a cure?

This interaction will end with Cal asking, “When all of this is said and done… Can I see you again? I'd… very much like to take you up on that pint. To celebrate.”

This interaction can end amicably or with a hug, but should you ask him, Cal will kiss you. He's careful, as if worried that one wrong move will ruin the moment. 

But, should you wish to continue the kiss, he lets himself melt into your embrace.

And, as he deepens the kiss, he'll hum softly, contentedly.

And, almost bashfully, he will mention that he'd love to show you his bedroom. He even offers for you to spend the night there. With him. Only if you want, of course.

The choice is yours.

He will say to you, either before you bid him farewell on the balcony (or as you are saying goodbye the following morning), “Please come back. Alive. I don't care if you've turned into a mind flayer or not. I just want you.”

But after Elturel's descent, where everyone prayed for the city to be returned to the material plane for life to then go back to normal (only for the Elturelian tieflings to promptly be exiled), he doesn't want to take a chance on things returning to normalcy after the Netherbrain is defeated.

So, before the final battle, the two of you get that pint at the Elfsong. And you talk for hours. 

It is entirely your call if the two of you end the evening by sharing a bed.

If you do, Cal holds you the entire night. He’s almost reluctant to let you go in the morning, because he is frightened that it might be the last time he sees you alive.

Should you and Cal share a kiss at any point in Act 3, he will appear in the grand hall before the final battle.

He jokes that Rolan has been practically obsessed with getting the Tower's cannon in working order. 

If you ask him for a good luck kiss, he will give you one. 

This kiss is urgent. Cal's eyes are squeezed shut as he presses his lips to yours. He is desperately trying to communicate all of his feelings to you in that one moment, and he knows his time is limited.

And then he pulls back with a shaky breath, resting his forehead against yours, his thumbs running down the line of your jaw.

“Come back, alright? I’ll be here, ready to patch you up. I… I love you."

[underdark-dreams]

Can you please talk about your writing! how you write and revise and where you get your inspiration you are just so amazing! I could use some tips to get my writing to the next level. maybe some fic recs you find inspiring as well? only if you want too.

I sat on this ask for a while to mull it over, so thanks for your patience! I can definitely talk about my general process and link some fics that have inspired me.

I've also answered some other asks about writing process and technique. You can read those here if you like:

Emotional and feelings-focused writing

Writing descriptively

Fic writing: general process

First, it's good to have your opening and your ending in mind before you start. Even if it's just:

OC walks into Sorcerous Sundries

Rolan and OC fall asleep together

If you have the bookends, it's a lot easier to find the story's beats in the middle. (Or decide that you can't find the path from A to B after all & need to change one of them around)

Once I have those two down, I usually write out the main beats of the story next. These will be the parts that excite you most as a writer!! Like, they make you giddy to write about! Getting these down on paper has ALWAYS given me a burst of momentum to get through the drier/connecting bits.

So I encourage you to write out the story events/scenes that make you most excited first. Exposition will come later! Don't worry about 'setting things up' right now, unless you really want to start there. Remember that your first draft only has to make sense to you.

Inspiration

Damn if I could bottle the answer to this one, I'd be set for life! lmao

A lot of people start writing first and find the inspiration along the way. It's a valid and effective method!

I usually wait for ideas to come to me first, and they usually come when I'm totally disconnected from my writing computer. I swear, my strongest ideas for a fic setup or interesting scene always come when I'm at work or vacuuming or some crap

Best advice I can give is to keep a notes app on your phone or something similar. Rotate your characters around in your mind while you're doing other random life things, and good ideas will usually come to you. Jot down the framework or some dialogue or whatever strikes you before you forget it, then revisit it when you have more time.

Revising and editing

I'm one of those writers who edits a ton as they go, instead of drafting out a story and revising in one go. So this part is kind of difficult for me to answer...the two processes are unfortunately so interconnected in my head!

The main thing is to make sure you give yourself a few days between writing and doing your final edit. Even if you've been revising along the way, taking some time away from your fic lets you gain a fresh perspective.

I will admit, I also keep thesaurus.com open in a tab at all times. Like. I am addicted to finding just the right word

As with all of the above, your mileage may vary! The right technique is the one that gets you writing and creating. 💯

Fic Recs

Here's a list from back in December! Still in love with all of these!

Also:

Deeply and Immovably So by Cometra / @dutifullylazybread - Absolutely required reading for any Rolan x Tav fans! Tav is AFAB/she/her. Darcy's worldbuilding and imagery is incredible, very deep and meaningful. Just all-around excellence!

verso by aes3plex - Zevlor x m!Tav oneshot. This story like...made me understand who Zevlor was as a character. I don't know how else to describe it. Really wonderful backstory threaded through a present-day encounter with some of the best prose ever. Love!

But I will admit, I grew up reading Trek fics, and those stories and writers have stayed with me longer than anything else. I think old fandom + huge universe + writers with sheer decades of experience in fanon have a lot to do with the quality of writing there. Not relevant to BG3 but has definitely shaped how I write today!

[lemonsrosesandlavender]

Rolan and Darcy obviously have great differences - most notably their station in society, though there are lots of others - but I’m not the only one who feels they have similar vibes, I know.

… [circumstances] taught me to be selfish and overbearing; to care for none beyond my own family circle; to think meanly of all the rest of the world; to wish at least to think meanly of their sense and worth compared with my own. Such I was, from eight to eight and twenty; and such I might still have been but for you, dearest, loveliest Eliza Tav

Personally, I love this quote - and it feels right for where a romance with Rolan and Tav should end up. (I’ve selectively chosen to omit the aforementioned differences in the causes of Rolan/Darcy being an ass).

Any other good ones? <3

[darkurgetrash]

WIP Tag Game ♥︎

Thank you for the tag, @dutifullylazybread! If you guys haven't read Darcy's fic 'Deeply and Immovably So', you need to, it's slow-burn and angst to the max.

I'd like to tag @charmedcleric, @graysparrowao3 and @viennacherries - plus anyone who is currently writing Rolan fanfic, I'm always looking for more recommendations for fluff in particular! [No pressure.]

As for my current WIP, I'm working on Chapter 12 of Lead Me Through the Dark. I only just posted Chapter 11 yesterday, so make sure to check that out BEFORE reading this WIP (and be sure to read the content warnings as it is graphic)!

Thanks to everyone that decides to take a read. Spoilers ahead...

CW: graphic depictions of violence.

Time froze as Rolan beheld Tav's torn-apart body on the shattered floorboards before him. Blood seeped in a pool around her - staining her light hair a dark red, soaking her clothes. She was looking at the Talonites in front of her, her face contorted in pain; an unrecognisable mask of agony. He had only seconds to act, he knew this, but he was paralysed - able to do nothing but stare at her eyes, her beautiful eyes that held a horrifying glazed-over expression, unseeing, fluttering closed…

She was dying.

The room seemed to shrink around him, the air becoming thick with the metallic tang of her draining life; the stench of violence. His fist clenched tightly in rage, his nails drawing blood from his palm as they dug into his skin.

"I'm n-nobody..."

Her shallow breathing echoed in the silence, each one failing to move him from his paralysing fear, his mind reeling in disbelief. Not Tav... It couldn't possibly be Tav before him.

No time. 

There was no time.

All of a sudden, he felt the weave rush to his aid, imploding within him and seeping out through the ridges on his skin, bubbling behind his fingertips. It screamed for control, taking over his entire body.

“DOLOR!”

A green bolt the colour of death shot from his hands as the words fought their way out of his lips, hitting the elven woman squarely on her back and turning her to nothing more than ash. Immediately, the Weave took payment and Rolan felt his body weaken, but he couldn’t give in yet. There was still one left.

He regained control of his mind, moving himself out of his stupor. He had such little energy left but he needed to use it all, every single ounce. He moved forward just as the orc lunged, narrowly avoiding the edge of his blade as he thrust his own hand against the man’s chest.

“Fulgo!”

The spell hit as Rolan had intended, directly to his heart. He rose from the floor, body spasming with the magical electricity which fed on him, before dropping dead at Rolan’s feet. The energy of the Weave ricocheted through the room, demanding its dues, but Rolan couldn’t pay them - not yet, please not yet, not when he had to save her.

[lostinforestbound]

WIP GAME

Tagged by the lovely @dutifullylazybread ! Thanks so much Darcy, I love doing these!

Rules: make a new post and share 1-2 sentences from your most recent unposted WIP(s) with zero context – Let your followers guess!

Oh boy it was hard to choose what section specifically, but I decided on this one!

-Maybe not, but at least Tav would be there, just a little longer; just enough time for him to pine once more. Lia is right, he's a very selfish creature.

I will tag @el-tur-el @underdark-dreams and @graysparrowao3 (I hope you get out of tumblr jail soon, we miss you!)