#thank you for the tiny rhett content

[mayhem24-7forever]

Cowgirl Lessons

Rhett Abbott (Outer Range) x F!Reader Oneshot

Summary: When she decides to spend her spring break from grad school in Wabang Wyoming, Y/N finds herself getting a little extracurricular education from a dashing cowboy named Rhett Abbott... with important courses like two stepping, cowboy hat law, bull riding, and lassoing/rope work.

Author’s Notes: Firstly, I don’t want minors reading any of my fics, even if they are SFW so this one is especially off limits! I deserve a safe place to express myself so please respect my boundaries. this is super long (like over 15k lmao) but it’s my birthday so #treatyoself. this came out of a conversation with @hyperfixatingmenever and @a-reader-and-a-writer on the top gun discord… so this is dedicated to the server. Big thanks to everyone who helped me out with this including @marvelandotherfandomimagines and @topguncortez​. fic divider by the lovely @a-reader-and-a-writer 💕

Content Warnings: bull riding (poor bulls tbh at least this is fake), mentions of injuries from bull riding, people referring to rhett as the town slut/manwhore (because he is and I love him for it), reader is referred to as a “city girl” so i’m very sorry to anyone from the country, small children being embarrassing menaces, overprotective brothers, profanity, drunk guy cat-calling once, drinking, dancing (two-stepping), flirting (like SO much flirting), making out, distracted driving (DO NOT FUCK OR FINGER WHILE DRIVING IN REAL LIFE ITS UNSAFE), fingering, teasing, one (1 singular) spank, dry humping/riding, unprotected p in v sex (please wrap it before you tap it in real life guys even if clean/on the pill), rope bondage, consensual somnophilia (waking up to being eaten out after giving permission the previous night), oral sex (female receiving), shower sex, having trouble walking after getting railed

The tiny town of Wabang, Wyoming was not where Y/N had thought she’d ever willingly choose to take a vacation, especially if she had other more exciting options. Nevertheless, it was where she found herself on her spring break from grad school, having decided to accept her brother’s invitation to spend two weeks there. At first, she had been excited, she hadn’t seen her brother much since he got married to a farm girl and moved to Wyoming to start a family, only getting to see him once or twice a year when he came over for the holidays. She was also excited to finally see his ranch, never having been able to visit before. Of course, she was a little disappointed as she got texts and saw social media posts from the rest of her cohort, practically everyone she knew seemed to have escaped to Miami, L.A., Cabo, or somewhere else warm, tropical and gorgeous. It wasn’t that Wyoming wasn’t beautiful–it most certainly was. From the peaks of the picturesque mountains to the wide open plains straight out of a postcard, it was one of the most beautiful places she’d ever been. But for as amazing as Wyoming was, she couldn’t help but think that she may have made a mistake.

At that very moment, her roommates were likely on a beach, surrounded by shirtless ripped frat bros and gorgeous women in skimpy bikinis, pounding back shots of tequila while grinding on some jacked hotties to a Ke$ha song. All while she was sitting in the uncomfortable metal stands of the Amelia County rodeo ring playing babysitter for her brother’s kids as they watched a bunch of grown men in cowboy hats ride large cows and fall on their asses in the dirt a bunch. While her friends were getting drunk, having sex, and partying, she was swatting flies away from her eight year old niece’s corndog and trying to keep her five year old nephew from dripping his ice cream all over himself and everyone else within a ten foot radius.

“Auntie Y/N?” her niece, Sarah, asked and she turned to look at her.

“Yes, lovebug?” she replied.

“I need to go to the bathroom.” Sarah said.

“Okay, lovebug.” she told her before turning to her nephew. “Come on, Jesse.”

She had never herded cattle before, but if she had to guess, it was probably much like trying to keep two small children focused on the simple task of walking to a bathroom. As they walked down the stairs of the stand, Jesse decided he wanted to run to the top so he could ‘see the bulls in the pens from up high’. After getting him down to the bottom, she realized that Sarah was jumping up and down to try and see over the fence, not believing Y/N when she said that the ring was empty because they were between rides and pouting when her aunt pulled her away.

As they made their way through the crowd towards the porta potties, she tried to no avail to get either of them to hold her hand, meaning she was much more focused on keeping her eyes on them than to the crowd around her. The crowd was thinning a little and the kids were still surging ahead without her, although luckily she could see them heading for the porta potty doors.

“Sarah! Jesse! Come back here!” she called out, too busy watching them to watch her step as she smacked right into a broad shouldered frame.

She was falling backwards for a moment before a pair of strong arms wrapped themselves around her waist and caught her before she hit the dirt. She was pulled up to her feet and steadied by the hands as she looked up at the person who had caught her. He was tall and quite handsome with the most striking blue eyes she had ever seen, his ear-length brown hair pushed back below his cowboy hat.

“Are you alright, Miss?” he asked, his voice low with just the hint of a country accent.

“I’m so sorry! I wasn’t looking where I was going!” she exclaimed, suddenly realizing how close she was to him with her hands on his chest as he still held her waist and she stepped back, embarrassed. “Thank you for catching me.”

“It’s quite alright, Miss. I hope I didn’t get any dirt on your pretty dress.” he replied, dusting off his gloves as she looked past him, relieved to see both kids opening the porta potty doors and stepping inside and he turned to follow her gaze. “Sarah and Jesse giving you trouble?”

“Yes, I-” she began and paused, confused. “How did you know?”

“Sarah is good friends with my niece, Amy, and they live near our ranch so I drive them all home from school on Tuesdays and Thursdays.” he explained before pulling off his glove and holding out his hand. “I’m Rhett Abbott.”

“Y/N Y/L/N.” she replied as she shook it, trying to ignore the shiver of attraction that ran through her body when she felt his strong grip.

He smiled at her name and she knew that the grin of that handsome devil could be the death of her. The crowd had thinned out but she still walked closer to the bathrooms so she wouldn’t miss when the kids came out, Rhett trailing behind her. She finally noticed that he was wearing chaps over his jeans and one of the protective vests the riders had to wear over his blue plaid button up, the sleeves rolled up to showcase his well-defined arms.

“Are you a bull rider? I haven’t been able to pay much attention to the rodeo while trying to watch those two.” she asked.

“Yeah, I imagine those two are keeping you busy.” he said with a smirk. “And yes, I’m riding tonight.”

“I have to admit, I’m not entirely sure how bull riding works. I tried asking the kids but Jesse just said ‘you have to ride the bull the best’ and I have no idea what that means.” she said with a laugh and he chuckled.

“Well, there’s all kinds of rules about only using one hand and not touching the bull and tryin’ to earn the most points and the like but the most important thing is to try and last the full eight seconds without falling off.” he explained and she nodded.

“And do you often last the full eight seconds?” she asked, not entirely talking about bull riding any more.

“Oh, I always last far longer than eight seconds…” he replied with a smirk and she knew they definitely weren’t talking about bull riding anymore. “I was wondering if-”

“AUNTIE Y/N!” Jesse yelled as he ran out of the bathrooms and towards her, interrupting Rhett, who looked a little disappointed.

“WASH YOUR HANDS!” she ordered, pointing at the portable sink and shaking her head as he turned around to do as she asked, running back to her when he was done.

“Auntie Y/N, can I have another ice cream?” he asked, tugging on her dress before turning to the man talking to her. “Oh, hiya Mr. Rhett.”

“Jesse, I’ve told you about a hundred times that you can just call me Rhett.” he said, clearly amused by the young boy’s formality.

“Ma told me I have to say Mister and Miss for any adults who ain’t family.” Jesse said firmly before turning back to his aunt and tugging on her dress again, looking up at her with wide, puppy dog eyes. “Can I have another ice cream pleeeease?”

“One is enough for tonight little munchkin, but it was a good try.” she told him and he giggled.

“Listen, I wanted to ask you-” Rhett started but was interrupted once more.

“ABBOTT! YOU GOT FIVE MINUTES BEFORE YOUR RIDE! GET ON IT!” a man called out from near the fence at the back of the bull pens.

“ONE MINUTE!” Rhett called back, obviously annoyed at another interruption, before turning back to her. “I wanted to ask if you’d like to get a drink with me tonight? There’s a bar called the Handsome Gambler over on main street that I usually go to after a ride.”

He was smiling confidently but she could see a hint of nervousness in his eyes that made her feel special. Here was a man who regularly rode thousand pound cows angrily trying to buck him off but he was anxious that she might say no to a drink with him. She smiled.

“I have to get the kids home but if I’m not too tired after that, I think a drink might be nice.” she said coyly and he grinned. “But fair warning, I’m not a beer and whiskey type girl, more of a fruity cocktail kinda girl.”

“Wouldn’t expect anything less from a pretty city girl.” he replied and she smiled.

“RHETT!” the man called again and Rhett sighed.

“Go on cowboy, you’ve got a bull to ride.” she said, patting his chest before giving him a playful push towards the arena with a wink. “We can talk more at the bar.”

“Looking forward to it.” he said with a smirk before tipping his hat and walking towards the ring.

“Good luck!” she called after him.

“Good luck Mr. Rhett!” Jesse added, waving.

She watched him disappear into the back area of the ring, off limits to the audience and once he was gone, she turned to see Sarah washing her hands.

“Come on, lovebug! We’ve got some bull riding to watch!” Y/N called to her niece who smiled as she ran over to her. “Now, this time, you’re both gonna hold my hands until we get to the stands or you’re gonna be in big trouble.”

Miraculously, they made it back to their seats without either of the kids running off. She was smoothing out her dress skirt when Jesse suddenly started crawling onto her lap.

“What are you doing, you little munchkin?” she asked, amused.

“The seats are so uncomfortable, Auntie Y/N!” he explained with a pout. “Ma and pa always let me sit on their laps.”

“Alright, come here.” she told him and he smiled widely as she took him into her arms and sat him on her lap.

“Time for our last ride of the night, folks!” the announcer said through the crackly old speakers. “And it should be a good one! We have our hometown hero Rhett Abbott, winner of the Wyoming Rodeo competition last year, placed fifth in the semi-nationals, and tonight he’ll be riding the ever ornery bull ‘Napalm’. Napalm has quite the reputation for ending winning streaks and knocking riders out of the competition, and often, into the hospital. If Rhett can last eight seconds on Napalm, he’ll be practically guaranteed to move forwards to the state competition once again this year.”

At the mention of a hospital, Y/N sat up nervously, eyes glued to the back gate where she could see Rhett climbing in a pen, the bull he was mounting bucked wildly even in such a small space. Aside from plenty of nasty looking bruises, the worst injury they had seen that night was a man who broke his leg when he was thrown from the bull but he had been smiling and had his thumbs up as the on-site paramedics had carried him out of the ring.

This bull seemed more determined than any before to throw his rider, looking so angry that he probably wouldn’t want to stop until Rhett was below his hooves. From afar she could see the handlers struggling to keep Rhett upright as Napalm threw itself around the small pen wildly. She put her hand over her mouth and began chewing on her fingernails, a habit she only did before large exams and important presentations at school. Suddenly, she felt a little hand on her arm, pulling her hand down and she turned to see Sarah beside her, looking up at her with a caring expression.

“Don’t bite your fingernails Auntie Y/N, ma says it’s real bad.” she cautioned and Y/N managed a smile as she put her hand in Sarah’s and gave it a light squeeze.

“Thank you, lovebug.” Y/N said before leaning over to press a kiss to her niece’s forehead. “Just a little worried about Rhett, I don’t want him to get hurt.”

“Don’t worry, Mr Rhett is real good at riding bulls, pa always bets on him.” Sarah replied with a big smile at trying to be helpful.

Before Y/N could respond, a loud and low air horn sounded and the gate was thrown open. The crowd rose to their feet, blocking her view as they cheered wildly. Quickly, she shot up, holding Jesse close to her as she looked over the cowboy hats of the men in front of her, Sarah climbing to stand on her seat so she could see too. When she had seen the first bull ride of the night, she thought it was the most terrifying thing she’d ever seen, questioning why anyone in their right mind would do it as rider after rider was thrown from the bucking bulls and into the dirt. But this one made all the rest look like child’s play, the bull bucking higher and faster and harder as it spun, desperate to knock Rhett off.

Everything was happening so fast that it was almost a blur, even though it felt like a lifetime as she watched him struggle to stay on. At some point his hat had flown off and into the dirt and the bull had almost trampled on it. A cloud of dust was kicked up by Napalm’s hooves, making it a little harder to see but still the crowd cheered as Rhett stayed on. Suddenly, a buzzer rang out, signaling the end of the eight seconds. She wasn’t sure if he had jumped or been thrown but in a flash Rhett was on the ground, some handlers helping him up and away from the angry animal as others roped the bull and returned it to its pen.

When Rhett stood up fully, looking relatively unharmed as a handler handed him his hat, she breathed out a sigh of relief, one she hadn’t even realized she had been holding. As he put his hat on his head, he spun around to look at the scoreboard which changed to show him in first place, miles above the other riders in points. The crowd went wild, so loud and passionate that Y/N was certain there were Super Bowls and arena concerts with less excited crowds.

Sarah jumped up and down on her seat, her arms raised as she screamed happily, Jesse pulling himself off of his aunt’s shoulder to holler as well. She shifted her nephew so that she could clap and cheer, smiling down at Rhett’s figure in the ring. He was reveling in his victory but she could see that he seemed to be searching the crowd for something–or someone, she realized when his eyes met hers. His smile spread into a grin and she smiled back as she clapped and cheered. A handler walked up to Rhett and drew him–rather reluctantly–away from the crowd, sparing one last glance over his shoulder as he was led through the back gates out of the ring.

“Another fantastic ride for Rhett that has secured his place in the state competition!” the announcer said as the crowd continued to cheer. “Thank y'all for coming out to tonight’s rodeo, have a safe night!”

With that, the crowd began to file out of the stands and out into the gravel and dirt parking lot as she took a moment to catch her breath and calm her heart rate, so relieved that not only was Rhett okay but that he had seemingly won too. Jesse was beginning to nod off as he came down from his sugar high so she shifted him onto her hip as she led Sarah by the hand, who was rambling about how great of a ride that was and how she knew Mr. Rhett could do it. Y/N had a sneaking suspicion that her niece was harboring a bit of a school girl crush on him, which she found rather amusing.

They stood by the parking lot and played I Spy until her brother’s dirty red pick-up truck pulled up in front of them. Jenna, her sister-in-law, hopped out of the passenger seat to hug her babies, who were definitely very glad to see her. Y/N sat in the passenger seat as Jenna sat in the back between her children’s car seats. As her brother Sam pulled out of the parking lot and onto the road, he looked in the rearview mirror at his family.

“Did you have a good time with Auntie Y/N?” he asked and the kids nodded before he turned to his sister. “Did they behave themselves?”

“Yes, they did.” she answered. “How was your date night?”

“Absolutely perfect.” Jenna said happily. “Thank you so much for watching them, we haven’t had a real proper date night in a few years.”

“Of course, it was fun.” Y/N replied, smiling at her sister-in-law.

“How was your first rodeo, sis?” Sam asked.

“Definitely… interesting.” she answered and he chuckled.

“Yeah, it took some getting used to when I first moved out here, Jenna used to say that I looked more scared than the actual riders.” he said and the kids laughed. “Who had the best score of the night?”

“Mr. Rhett!” Sarah piped up. “Mr. Ricky in the speakers said he gets to go to the state competition. He rode the whole eight seconds and he got way more points than everybody else!”

“Well I’ll be damned, looks like I just made twenty bucks off Carl at the seed store.” her brother said with a smile.

“Mr. Rhett and Auntie Y/N are going on a date!” Jesse exclaimed suddenly and Sam struggled not to swerve the car on the road before looking to his sister in disbelief as his son continued. “I heard him ask her to go to the place on main street where mommy says kids aren’t allowed.”

“Rhett Abbott?” Sam asked and she looked down in embarrassment at being ratted out by her nephew.

“I was going to ask if you could drop me off at the Handsome Gambler instead of my hotel.” she said quietly, referring to the little motel room her brother had put her up in because he was still working on building the new addition to the house for a spare room.

“Rhett Abbott?” Sam asked again incredulously and Jenna leaned forward to slap Sam’s shoulder and look at her sister-in-law.

“Rhett’s a nice man, you’ll have fun.” Jenna said before lowering her voice and giving a wink. “And he’s real good-looking too, you chose well.”

“No, no, no!” Sam exclaimed, hitting the steering wheel for emphasis. “My little sister is not going out with Rhett Abbott the…” he trailed off as he glanced into the rearview mirror to see the kids listening in and quietly added “...the M-A-N-W-H-O-R-E of Wabang!”

“Daddy, what does that spell?” Sarah asked.

“I’ll tell you later, sweetie.” he replied before looking at his wife. “I can’t believe you’re encouraging this.”

“Oh, stop it Sam!” Jenna said as she rolled her eyes. “She’s an adult who can make her own choices! Besides, she deserves to have a little fun on her spring break without her big brother ruining it.”

“Fine. But if he hurts you Y/N, I swear I’ll beat his…” he trailed off again as he noticed the kids were watching. “...butt.”

The kids started giggling, thinking that their father saying ‘butt’ was the funniest thing they’d ever heard.

“So, will you drop me off at the bar?” she asked her brother and he sighed before nodding reluctantly.

“Auntie Y/N and Mr. Rhett! Sittin’ in a tree!” Jesse began to sing and Jenna tried not to laugh. “K-I-S-S… I don’t know the rest.”

“It’s ‘K-I-S-S-I-N-G! First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes a baby in the baby carriage!’” Sarah exclaimed helpfully.

“If Mr. Rhett marries Auntie Y/N, do we call him just Rhett ‘cuz he’s family or do we still call him Mr. Rhett?” Jesse asked his mother.

“He’d be Uncle Rhett then.” Sarah corrected, a proud smile on her face.

Y/N felt like she was going to die from embarrassment and stared out the window to avoid looking at anyone as her sister-in-law hushed the children. She couldn’t stop thinking about her brother’s words. Was Rhett really the town slut? He flirted with her so easily that it was obvious he wasn’t new to picking up girls and he was certainly handsome enough to leave a long trail of broken hearts behind him. Rhett was probably just a player looking to get his dick wet but wasn’t that what she was hoping to do too? She supposed that she could keep her heart out of it for her pussy’s sake and have a fun little spring break fling.

Soon enough, they pulled up in front of the bar on main street and she hopped out, turning back to lean through the open window to speak to her brother.

“Thank you for the ride, Sammy, I’ll see you tomorrow morning!” she said but before she could turn around to head into the bar, he reached out and placed a hand on her arm.

“Hey.” he said lowly, not wanting the kids to hear him. “I’m serious, call me if you need a ride or help or anything, alright? I don’t care if it’s at three a.m. or something, just call me.”

“I will, Sammy, thank you.” she assured her big brother, placing her hand over his to squeeze reassuringly before turning to walk towards the door.

“Have fun girlie! But not too much fun, it might be a bit too soon for you to become a momma!” Jenna called out and Y/N laughed as she grabbed the door handle.

The Handsome Gambler was just how she would expect a bar in a small midwestern town to be. It was dim and smokey, with neon signs on the walls casting colored light onto the packed tables of men in cowboy hats and women in cowgirl boots. When she entered, a man in a trucker hat wolf-whistled at her and she had the sudden urge to turn around and leave.

“Shut up Hendricks or I’ll make you eat your teeth!” Rhett’s voice warned and she looked to where the voice had come from.

She locked eyes with Rhett, who was sitting at the bar, hat on the counter and he smiled at her, giving her the courage to continue walking. If she had thought he was handsome in his bull rider get-up, she was blown away with how he made the most casual outfit sexy. Blue jeans (with an unfortunately large belt buckle), a gray henley and a blue flannel button-up should not have been making her squirm but the way he had the sleeves rolled up to display his muscular forearms somehow made her want to climb him right there in the bar.

This feeling was only intensified when she realized that he was wearing a different blue flannel than he had earlier, meaning he had changed specifically for her. A small voice in the back of her head tried to reason that it was likely just because his clothes had been dirty and sweaty from the ring but she chose to ignore it and allow herself to be flattered he was making an effort for her. He stood as she approached, his eyes briefly skimming over her body to admire her dress before returning to her face.

“Apologies for Mr. Hendricks, he’s an annoying asshole who can’t remember his manners when he drinks but he really is harmless. In about ten minutes he’ll be passed out in his usual corner.” Rhett assured her and she laughed.

“I can handle some cat-calls, it’s when they try to get handsy that I bring out my pepper spray.” she said, partially as a joke but Rhett just pursed his lips.

“Well I can assure you no one around here is going to be bothering you. If your brother isn’t enough to deter them, I’ll make sure they get the memo.” he said earnestly and she smiled.

He pulled back her stool and helped her up, surprising her with his chivalry, so unlike the usual skirt-chasers she ran into at the university. Usually men could barely be bothered to text back and yet here was Rhett, treating her like she was royalty. She’d be lying if she said she didn’t like it.

“Wasn’t sure if you’d come but I sure am glad you did.” He said as he sat back down beside her. “Can I buy you a drink?”

“Only if you remember what I told you earlier.” she said coyly, testing how much he had actually paid attention to her at the rodeo.

“Kenny, I’ll have a beer.” Rhett said to the man behind the bar with a slight smirk as he added “...and can you make something like a fruit cocktail? I don’t believe the lady likes her alcohol to taste like alcohol.”

“You remembered.” she said with a laugh as Kenny went to get the drinks.

“You sound surprised. Do city boys not listen well?” he asked.

“Not too many of them.” she replied.

“Damn shame, I could listen to your cute little accent all day long.” he said and she blushed at the compliment.

“Some might argue that you have the accent.” she shot back.

“Not when you’re in my territory, sweetheart.” he said with that dazzling smile that she thought could charm the pants off a nun.

“I suppose you’re right.” she said before Kenny returned with a beer bottle and what she believed was an attempt at a cocktail, setting down in front of her a glass of pinkish red liquid and ice with a cherry on a toothpick hanging off the side. “Thank you.”

“That may be the fanciest thing I’ve ever seen Kenny make.” Rhett said when he left them to talk to a customer further down the bar. “How’s it taste?”

She took a sip and laughed, causing Rhett to ask her what was so funny.

“I’m fairly certain that this is just tequila mixed with fruit punch.” she answered.

“Really?” Rhett asked, amused and she slid the drink closer to him so he could have a sip. “Oh, that is definitely just tequila mixed with fruit punch.”

“I will say, I actually quite like it.” she said, pulling it closer to her again before popping the cherry into her mouth and taking another drink.

“So, how was your first rodeo?” Rhett asked before taking a swig of his beer. “Everything you thought it would be?”

“It was…” she trailed off, unsure how to summarize it all. “Well, I don’t think I’ve been as stressed as I was watching you ride since I presented my thesis idea last year.”

“You were worried about me?” Rhett asked and although his smirk was cocky, she could hear the undercurrent of vulnerability, like he was genuinely surprised that she actually cared about if he had gotten hurt.

“Yes, I was. That bull was like nothing I’d seen all night and the way the announcer talked about it had me squeezing Sarah’s hand probably a bit too hard.” she replied. “But I guess I had no reason to be worried because you made it look almost easy.”

“Well, I am real good at what I do.” he assured her earnestly before smirking and suggestively adding “I’m real good at everything I do.”

“Easy there, cowboy!” she said with a laugh, feeling more comfortable with him after five minutes than she felt with most people she had known for years. He was just so easy to talk to, being effortlessly vulnerable yet continually making her laugh like he was starved for the sound a way a man is starved for water in a desert.

“Just trying to keep you on your toes, girl.” he said with a wink.

“So what do you do when you’re not riding bulls or winking at girls in bars?” she asked, changing the subject.

“I work on my family’s ranch and sometimes if I have time, I hire myself out as a farmhand to other local ranchers when they need it.” he answered. “But the rodeo circuits are my main job.”

“You enjoy being thrown off thousand pound cows into the dirt?” she asked. “Do you just really like pain, is that it?”

“You and your damn wit, girl…” he said, shaking his head with a chuckle. “Nobody would ever even know you’re related to quiet old Sam with a wicked tongue like that. But yes, I do enjoy it. Maybe not the pain so much but there’s just something about how exhilarating it feels during those eight seconds. So freeing.”

“Sounds terrifying, I think I’ll stick to bike riding. Or maybe horse riding if I can stop almost falling off the damn thing.” she joked.

“Not having much luck with horses then?” Rhett asked, amused.

“I swear, if Sam wasn’t holding the saddle and walking beside me, I would have fallen off the horse more this week than every rider from tonight put together.” she answered. “I’m trying my best but I don’t think I’m very good at all this cowgirl stuff.”

“Maybe you just need a good teacher.” Rhett said.

“I’m supposed to be on spring break from school.” she replied with a laugh. “I’m supposed to be relaxing and having fun, not learning.”

“Who says you can’t do both?” Rhett purred, his low voice and southern drawl sending a wave of heat straight down to her core. “I mean, you just might need some practice straddling and riding something else.”

“I suppose you have something in particular in mind for your course curriculum?” she asked, leaning in to match his low whisper.

“Maybe one or two things.” he answered with that cocky smirk she couldn’t help but love.

“Then maybe we can start class later tonight…” she said so quietly he could only hear it because she was inches from his face before she pulled backwards into her original sitting position as he groaned and added at normal volume “but I don’t go home with just any old cowboy so let’s hope this date goes well.”

“How am I doing so far?” he asked and she smiled as she sipped her cocktail, ignoring the bulge in his pants that had grown as she had gotten closer.

“Ask me again after another drink or two.” she replied and he nodded.

“Yes ma’am.” he said, eyeing her half drunk drink.

They talked for a long while about their lives, their families, their childhoods. They talked about their favorite music and their hobbies and everything in between they could think of. They were getting to know one another, really hitting it off as the rest of the bar seemed to disappear. As they talked, she had to remind herself not to get lost in his beautiful blue eyes or get distracted by his rugged beauty, so handsome he was like a movie star straight out of one of the old western films her grandfather used to watch. When they had talked so long that her cocktail and his beer bottle were empty, Rhett flagged down the bartender to order another round.

“There’s still one thing I don’t understand.” he said as Kenny placed their second drinks in front of them, nodding a thanks. “Why come out to Wabang, Wyoming for spring break? Don’t college kids usually go to the beach or somethin’ like that?”

“They do. In fact, that’s where most of my friends are right now.” she replied. “But ever since Sam met Jenna and they moved out here, we really only see them when they come over for Christmas and Thanksgiving and stuff. I’d never seen the town that my brother fell in love with almost as much as he fell for Jenna or the little ranch that he’s always talking about on the phone. I wanted to see them all for a little longer than just a few days out of the year. So, two weeks in Wabang sounded pretty nice for a break.”

“And now?” Rhett asked. “Are you disappointed that you’re not on a beach with your friends?”

“Not really… I mean of course I’m a little jealous of all the pictures they’re sending me but Wyoming is really growing on me.” she said earnestly. “And besides, it has some things I couldn’t get on a beach.”

“Oh, yeah? Like what?” he asked.

“Well there’s one cowboy in particular who’s really caught my eye.” Rhett quirked an eyebrow in amused interest as she continued. “He told me he’d teach me how to be a cowgirl—an offer I’m still considering by the way… oh, and there’s this fantastic cocktail that you just can’t get anywhere but the Handsome Gambler.”

“And how is that tequila and fruit punch treating you?” Rhett asked and she laughed.

“I’ll be honest, it’s better than most of the ‘fancy’ overpriced drinks I’ve ever had at nightclubs with my friends.” she answered.

“I hope you were getting others to buy those for you. Pretty girls should never have to pay for their own drinks.” Rhett said.

“Aww, you think I’m pretty?” she asked teasingly with a smile.

“I think you’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen.” he said earnestly, without a single hint of irony and she was taken aback by his candor.

She was so used to men giving cheesy pick up lines and half-baked compliments just so they could get into her pants, that she was thrown off kilter by the realization that Rhett was serious. Evidently, he saw the surprise in her face because he leaned forwards, his blue eyes staring deep into her own.

“I mean every single word. I don’t want you to think that I’m just running my mouth to get you in bed.” he said and she froze under his gaze, struck by just how wrong she had been when she had assumed Rhett was just another player who would say anything to try and get his dick wet. “I mean of course I’d still love to have you in my bed but I really do like you.” She laughed a little at his cheeky addition but was still stunned speechless by his words.

“Rhett, I-” was all she managed to stutter out before blushing and looking down at the bartop in embarrassment. “I really like you too.”

He put his hand under her chin and pushed it upwards to bring her to look at him, his blue eyes holding her gaze intensely.

“Will you dance with me?” he asked with a smile.

“Dance?” she asked, surprised.

“Yeah, dancing. They have that in the big cities right?” he joked and she laughed, looking over at the couples on the dance floor doing some kind of slow dance.

“We do have dancing in the city, just maybe not that kind of dancing.” she said, turning back to him. “It’s more like grinding… you have to be pretty drunk to do it.”

“Well, how about I teach you how to two step and you teach me how to grind?” he replied, flashing that mischievous grin again. “It can be your first cowgirl lesson.”

“I will dance with you but I will not be grinding, I’m far too sober for that.” she answered. “So are you gonna teach me how to square dance? Err, line dance? What is it called?”

“I’ll teach you to two step, I think line dancing may be a bit advanced for a first timer.” Rhett said, standing up, putting his hat on, and holding out his hand.

She took it, memorizing every line and callus of his strong hand against her soft skin, and he helped her down from the stool before leading her over to the area that was serving as a dance floor. They got into a typical slow dancing position, her hand on his shoulder and his hand resting on her waist while their remaining hands joined together. He taught her a simple move called a “two step” and then they were off, waltzing around the dance floor as she tried to remain on beat.

He would occasionally give her a pointer or correction but for the most part he praised her for getting a hang of it fairly quickly. They kept up that simple routine for an entire song and by the time the final notes of “Head Over Boots” played, she no longer had to focus on counting and her steps, instead able to simply enjoy the feeling of his hand on her lower back keeping her pressed up against him.

“Alright darlin’, this next one is a little bit faster.” he warned her with a smile as the next song began to play. “You up for the challenge?”

“Bring it on, cowboy!” she replied and he smirked.

“Alright, I warned you.” he said with a mischievous glint in his eye that made her weak at the knees, distracting her so that when he spun her out and around before reeling her back in, she was caught completely off guard.

She laughed, trying (and failing) to avoid stepping on his boots as she adjusted to the new pace and the added spins but after another song or two, she had acclimated to the dancing quite well. As “Why Don’t We Just Dance” ended, they were both breathing hard through wide grins, her heaving chest pressed against his, grateful to discover the next song was a slow song. They switched from two stepping to simply swaying, catching their breath as some melodic crooning about “Tennessee Whiskey” relaxed them against one another.

“Has anyone ever told you that your hat is sexy?” she asked once their heart rates had returned to normal and their breathing evened out, looking up at him.

“Once or twice.” Rhett replied with a smirk.

“Well, in that case…” she said before reaching up to grab his hat, pulling it off his head and placing it on her own. “How do I look? Sexy?”

“I- err… yes, you do look sexy.” he said, a look on his face somewhere between surprise and nervousness.

“You look like I just took a baseball bat to your truck headlights or something. What is it? Do you not like people touching your hat?” she asked, starting to get a little nervous that she had somehow fucked up in her lame attempt at flirting.

“No… it’s just, uh, around here a girl putting on a guy’s hat means… something special.” Rhett answered.

“Something special?” she asked.

“It’s like a… well, an unofficial rule that if a lady takes a fella’s hat and puts it on herself, then she… she’s supposed to go home with him at the end of the night.” replied, his usual cocky demeanor missing as he seemed nervous to tell her.

“Oh…” she said, understanding the full meaning of what she’d just done.

“But you didn’t know and I don’t mean to make you uncomfortable, so I’ll just take it back.” He said, taking his hat off of her head and placing it firmly on his own, reaching his hand back out to tuck a strand of her hair behind her ear. “It’s a stupid tradition anyways. Just backcountry nonsense, really.”

She could tell that he seemed nervous, like she’d suddenly just slap him and storm off for daring to suggest that she had to sleep with him. She stared deep into his eyes, touched by the adoration and concern in them, genuinely caring if he had upset her. She took a breath to prepare herself for what she was about to do before launching up onto her toes, throwing her arms around his neck, and pressing her lips to his.

He seemed caught off guard for a moment before smiling against her lips as he deepened the kiss, his hands tightening around her waist to hold her closer. The kiss was so good that she almost forgot why she had initiated it in the first place, reaching up to snatch his hat off of his head, pulling back in his arms to place it firmly on her head with a wink.

“Oh no… It looks like I just have to go home with you tonight.” she purred coyly, giving him a smirk before leaning in and adding lowly “Or I guess you could come home with me since my hotel room is probably closer than your house and I just can’t wait to get my mouth on your cock.”

Rhett looked absolutely stunned, completely in awe of the gorgeous minx in his arms.

“God damn, woman…” was all he could manage to say, tipping the brim of his hat on her head up with a finger so he could hungrily kiss her again, one hand on her waist and the other on the side of her neck.

He kissed her like a man possessed until her chest was heaving against his, breathless from his affection when he pulled back and smirked at the dazed look on her face as she gazed up at him.

“I gotta get you outta here.” he growled before pulling her off the dance floor and towards the door, hand tight on her waist as he called out for Kenny to put the drinks on his tab.

It seemed like half the bar was staring at them as they exited, focused on Rhett’s hat on her head, but she couldn’t find the energy to care as Rhett looked back at her with a devilish grin that made tantalizing promises for when he got her alone. He held the door open for her as they left the bar and his warm palm was flat against her back as he steered her towards the passenger door of a blue pick-up truck. He opened the door for her and leaned in for another kiss, desperately missing the feeling of her lips against his. He had meant for it to be quick, he really had, but they simply couldn’t stop once they’d started. Her hands looped around his neck and into his hair as his hands wandered the silhouette of her body before settling on her ass with a small squeeze. She pulled back to catch her breath and put a hand on his chest as a signal to stop.

“You’d better get me to a bed, Rhett. I’m too classy to let you fuck me against your truck… well, at least not for our first time.” she said with a wink before turning to hop up into the passenger seat.

“Yes ma’am!” Rhett replied smugly as he closed the door and hurried around to get in the driver’s seat.

As he started the truck and pulled out of the parking lot, his hard cock ached, straining almost painfully against the confines of his jeans. The air was thick with sexual tension, the only noises being an old country song playing quietly on the crackly radio and the rumble of the engine. Rhett stared straight ahead at the road because he thought if he glanced at her, he’d likely have to pull over the truck and take her right there on the roadside in the bed of his truck. But he kept himself in check, thinking that she was the kind of girl who deserved to be fucked on the softest bed he could find.

He only lasted about a minute of driving before one of his hands moved from the steering wheel to rest on her thigh, toying with the hem of her dress just above her knee. His fingers wandered her thigh as he slowly pulled her dress up to reveal more and more of her bare skin. She shifted in her seat, squeezing her legs together as she tried to ignore the ever-growing wildfire of desire within her core that hadn’t given her a moment’s reprieve since it had sparked during their first kiss.

“What have we here?” Rhett asked as he caught a peek of her lacy panties as the fabric of her skirt bunched up at her waist.

The hungry rasp in his voice sent a shiver of attraction through her body and she dug her nails into the seat of his truck, gripping so hard that her knuckles were surely turning white.

“How’d you know that’s my favorite color?” he asked with a smirk and she sucked in a breath as his fingers skimmed over the waistband of her panties, and she felt as if they were miles away from the place she wanted him to touch.

“Oh god Rhett, please don’t tease.” she groaned as his wandering fingers advanced towards her clit but retreated just shy of reaching it.

“I’ll take care of you darlin’, just be patient.” he assured her, fingers trailing teasing patterns into the lacy fabric above her pussy. “Fuck, you look so sexy just sitting here all hot ‘n bothered in my truck in your pretty little dress with my hat on.”

She whined, desperately wishing for his fingers to move just inches down to relieve her burning need. Rhett’s teasing had frustrated her enough that she decided to take matters into her own hands, or more accurately, his. She grabbed his hand and pushed it down in between her legs, giving a sigh when she felt the slight pressure against her clit. Rhett chuckled but before she could ask what was so funny, his deft fingers pushed her panties aside and plunged two fingers deep into her wet core. She gasped in surprise and her hands flew to clutch his wrist as he began to slowly drag his fingers in and out.

“So impatient…” he tsked, plunging even deeper. “Do I need to tie your hands up so you’ll be a good girl?”

His words sent a thrill through her body and her pussy clenched at the thought, her walls squeezing his fingers as she let out a slight moan. Her reaction surprised Rhett and he decided to test a theory, still pumping in and out.

“Oh, you like that? You like the thought of being tied up?” he asked, voice low and rough. “You’d look so fucking hot all trussed up in my lasso.”

Once again, her pussy clenched and he chuckled. She was getting wetter by the second and he knew she was just as into the idea as he was.

“Is that what you want, girl? You want me to bring my lasso to bed? Tie you up and take you over and over until you can’t even think?” Rhett asked, stopping his movements completely when she didn’t answer, too lost in the feeling of the delicious drag of his fingers. “I said, is that what you want, girl? I won’t do shit until I know exactly what you want me to do to you tonight.”

“Yes! Oh god yes, Rhett!” she cried out, hands squeezing his wrist as if it would make him continue his movements. “I want you tie me up and fuck me so good, please Rhett!”

“There you go, darlin’. Good girls who use their words get rewarded.” he said, adding a third finger and resuming his movements as she gave a breathy moan. “Fuck, you feel so damn good around my fingers. Can’t wait to feel you around my cock. So god damn wet too, all this for me?”

She couldn’t even answer with anything more than a moan as he finger fucked her but Rhett knew the answer already. His thumb swirled her clit as his fingers thrust in and out of her cunt at a relentless pace and she could hardly breathe as her climax quickly approached.

“Rhett!” she exclaimed, her hands gripping onto his arm as the waves of pleasure finally began to crest.

“Shh, I’ve got you girl.” Rhett tsked like he was trying to calm a spooked animal and it only made her pussy clench down on his fingers harder as she orgasmed. “I don’t know what kind of small city boys you’ve been fucking in the past so I gotta make sure you’re ready to take a big country boy like me.” He rode her through her orgasm, giving one last hard thrust just before it ended and curling his fingers to reach that perfect spot inside before pulling his fingers out and bringing them to his mouth. She watched breathlessly as he sucked his fingers clean of her juices, humming in content as he pulled the truck into the hotel parking lot.

“If you can make me cum like that with just your fingers, I don’t think I’ll survive tonight.” she said and he smirked.

“Let’s see how long you can last riding on my cock. Maybe you’ll make it more than eight seconds like a true cowgirl.” he joked with a wink before hopping out of the truck and heading around to her side.

Still catching her breath, she was vaguely aware of him grabbing something from the truck bed and when he opened her door, she found him hanging his lasso on his belt. She turned to hop out only for Rhett to grab her by the waist and pull her out, setting her down between him and the truck. She reached up and wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him in for another kiss that slowly built in intensity until she was so caught up in the feeling of his tongue that she just barely noticed Rhett spinning her away from the truck and closing the door, walking her backwards towards the motel. They paused briefly so she could gasp out her room number and take the keys out of her pocket, which Rhett quickly took before he resumed steering her in the right direction.

Luckily, her room was on the first floor so they didn’t have to use the stairs, which would have been impossible with the way they were stumbling around blindly, connected at both the lips and the hips. They fumbled their way down the hallway, bumping into walls and doors as they made out with a ferocious hunger for one another. Evidently, Rhett became impatient with how slow their progress to her room was and he begrudgingly pulled his lips off of hers. Before she could whine or ask what he was doing, she suddenly found herself hoisted over his shoulder, looking down at his delicious backside as his strong arms anchored her thighs to his chest.

“Rhett!” she squealed in surprise and he silenced her with a light slap on her ass.

“Hush now girl, wouldn’t want to wake the other motel guests, would we?” he said smugly as he carefully leaned down to grab his hat from off the ground where it had fallen from her head when he had thrown her over his shoulder.

He put the hat back on his head as he hurried down the hallway to her room, briefly swearing as he fumbled with the keys to unlock the door. He swept inside, kicking the door closed behind him and flicking the light switch to turn on the lamps as he headed straight for the bed. She expected him to toss her onto the bed like a sack of potatoes with his hurry and ferocity but was surprised when he carefully laid her on the bed like she was the most fragile and precious thing he had ever touched. Her heart fluttered at how special it made her feel. She gazed up at him through her eyelashes as he chucked off his flannel and his boots, dropping them on the floor before setting his hat and lasso on the bed.

“Didn’t think you knew how to be gentle, cowboy.” she said cheekily, her breasts rising and falling as she caught her breath from the excitement and Rhett smirked as he pulled off her shoes and discarded them.

“I can be gentle if that’s what you want, sweetheart.” he said as he slowly and carefully climbed on top of her, gently brushing a strand of hair out of her face even as he caged her beneath him. “I can be whatever you want, darlin’. Gentle…” he purred, pressing feather-light kisses to her neck, a smile on his lips just barely ghosting over her skin before he moved to her ear. “Rough…” he growled before surging downwards to give her a bruisingly hard kiss that took her breath away before pulling back and leaving her gasping for air, blinking up at his smug smirk. “Somewhere in between…” he said as he returned to her neck, applying a light pressure as he tongued a spot that would surely be a hickey the next morning. It was just perfect and a long moan escaped her mouth involuntarily, her arms wrapping around his neck and threading her fingers into his hair with light tugs and Rhett chuckled against her skin. “Ah, there it is.” he said smugly.

“Don’t stop!” she cried out and he complied, returning to tonguing her skin. “Fuck, Rhett, don’t stop!”

Rhett’s mouth explored every inch of her skin from the top of her neck to the cleavage above the neckline of her dress, taking stock of what spots made her mewl and squirm the most. He pushed her dress straps aside so he could press tender kisses onto her shoulder, finding a particularly sensitive spot near her collarbone that he spent extra time teasing. His hands slipped beneath her body and began to unzip her dress, only getting halfway down her back before the zipper got stuck. He pulled it again but annoyingly it held fast. He yanked it once more, grumbling in frustration against her neck when it refused to come loose.

“Slow down there cowboy.” she warned and he pulled away from her skin to look at her. “You rip my favorite dress and I’ll cut up your favorite hat.”

“Darlin’, I’d like to see you try.” he replied with a smirk but nevertheless his movements slowed to carefully finish removing her dress, the zipper finally giving way and letting him pull it all the way down.

He slipped the fabric off of her body, reveling as more and more of her body was revealed to him, inch by tantalizing inch. He admired every curve, astonished with how she only seemed to get more and more attractive the less clothes she had on. He divested her of her bra much easier than he had with her dress, able to do it one-handed and without looking from a lot of practice. As her breasts were freed, her hands went to cover them instinctually, looking shy and nervous although he simply couldn’t understand why.

“Don’t hide from me sweetheart.” he coaxed, gently pulling her hands from her chest and taking in the sight of her bare breasts and stiffening nipples. She was gorgeous and he felt like he was looking at a goddess, unable to comprehend why she would ever think she was anything other than perfect. “You’re so beautiful, the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen. I mean it.”

She sucked in a breath at his lovely words and the almost irreverent look in his eyes as he gazed down at her body in admiration and she was caught off guard when he stooped down to return to kissing her, capturing her lips with his own before she could even have a moment to think of a response. Without the fabric of her dress as protection, the cold metal of his ridiculously large belt buckle teased her bare skin as it was pressed between their bodies and she wouldn’t be surprised if the next morning, she ended up with an indentation of it there on her stomach.

She realized that Rhett was still completely dressed while she had been stripped all the way down to only her panties. Wanting to even the playing field a bit, she grabbed at the hem of his shirt and began pulling it up, Rhett pulling back from the kiss to remove it completely, tossing it aside. She marveled at his well-toned abs, her fingers skating along the hard lines of muscle. She chuckled at the tattoo of a man riding a bull that he had on his right pec, the black ink a stark contrast to his sun kissed skin even in the low lamplight of the hotel room. He had a bruise on his ribcage that was forming and he knew it would hurt like a bitch in the morning but he couldn’t bring himself to care as he watched her eyes devour him.

“Doesn’t hurt much right now, sweetheart.” he assured her. “This was one of my luckier rides, not as beat up as I usually am even though Napalm was a real mean son of a bitch. Maybe you’re my lucky charm.”

“Are you sure it doesn’t hurt?” she asked tentatively when he winced as her fingertips grazed the tender skin.

“A little.” he answered, dipping down to whisper in her ear. “But I don’t really notice it when I have you to distract me.”

“Guess I better get to distracting then.” she replied with a smirk before latching on to his neck, determined to leave a mark on him to counter all the ones he had given her.

“Tryin’ to mark me up, girl?” he asked, half a chuckle, half a moan. “Let everyone in town know you’ve staked your claim on me?”

She laughed but was cut off as it suddenly turned into a moan, his hands grasping at her breasts. She found herself unbelievably turned on by his wandering hands (and mouth) as they continued to make out, pausing occasionally only to suck a hickey into the other’s neck before returning to their mouths. With his shirt off, her hands were able to explore his body, memorizing the feel of every inch of his skin under her fingertips. Feeling his erection straining against the confines of his jeans as he ground himself against her, she let her hands trail down his body to his belt.

She mentally cursed him for having such a ridiculously large belt buckle, making it ten times harder than it needed to be for her to undo it. After trying and failing a few times, she groaned in impatient frustration, tugging at his belt in angry desperation. She felt him smirk against her lips and before she had time to react, Rhett grabbed her wrists and pinned them above her head. She gasped in surprise and wiggled fruitlessly in his grip as he pulled back to admire the sight of her below him.

“Your hands are getting in my way, darlin’.” he scolded playfully. “Do I need to get my lasso out or can you behave like a good girl?”

“Hmmm…” she said, pretending to think before replying with mock innocence. “I’m not sure if I can control myself, Rhett.”

“You sure sweetheart?” he asked seriously, giving her an out she didn’t need.

“I’m sure.” she replied.

“Gonna need a safeword, darlin’. Got one in mind?” Rhett asked, trailing a finger down her front teasingly and she thought carefully for a moment.

“How about ‘Napalm’…” she said, a sly smile spreading on her face. “You know, in the hopes you can last longer than eight seconds with me.”

He laughed and said “I think I know how to put that wicked tongue of yours to better use…” before pulling her in to roughly kiss her.

She got no warning before he ended the kiss as suddenly as it began and he moved to sit up on his knees, roughly flipping her over before returning to straddle her. She didn’t even have time to gasp or whine as he pulled her hands behind her back and leaned over to grab his lasso. He arranged her arms so that they were one on top of the other with her elbows against the opposite wrists before beginning to wind his lasso around them as if he was making a design of some kind.

As he worked, she groaned at the sensation of his clothed erection against her ass. Her head was pushed against the mattress, the cool sheets cushioning her cheek and teasing her hard nipples. He smugly hummed a tune that she eventually recognized at the song that had been playing in the truck on the ride from the bar. She moved her arms and shoulders around slightly to test how sturdy his work in progress was and he reached around to pull her head up slightly, a careful but firm hand on her throat.

“You really need to learn how to behave, sweetheart.” he growled into her ear and she felt a shiver run down her spine in anticipation. “If you can’t stay still until I’m done, I’m gonna leave you tied up to make you watch me jerk myself off and you won’t get to cum again tonight. Got it?”

“Yes.” she replied breathlessly, his hand around her throat gentle to not hurt her or cut off her air but still firm enough to remind her he was in charge.

“Yes, what?” he asked, squeezing just a miniscule amount so she had to take slightly deeper breaths to answer.

“Yes, sir.” she replied and he removed the pressure on her throat so she could breathe normally again, his hand only serving to keep her head up.

“Good girl.” he cooed, pressing a soft rewarding kiss onto her shoulder before lowering her back down and resuming his work.

She stayed still, just enjoying the feeling of the coarse rope on her skin until her arms were completely bound together and Rhett was seemingly pleased with his work.

“Is that too tight, darlin’?” he asked.

“It’s perfect.” she answered before smugly adding “Sir.”

In seconds, he had her flipped back over onto her back, her arms trapped beneath her but she obediently stayed still, gazing up at him faux-innocently as she waited for his next instruction.

“Alright darlin’, test it out.” he ordered smugly. “See if my ropework is adequate enough for your high city standards.”

Following his instructions, she tried to pull her wrists free but only succeeded in wiggling her upper half. With her shoulders back, her chest was pushed out and Rhett seemed very pleased at the sight of her wriggling form, her breasts jiggling lightly. He cupped her cheek and brushed his thumb against her lips teasingly before moving to run his fingers over her nipples.

She was helpless, but in the best way possible. She liked–no, loved–being at his mercy, completely reliant on him to provide for her pleasure. It was strange, she had never given anyone that kind of power over her in bed, not even long-term lovers, she just didn’t trust them. But for some baffling reason, she was not only comfortable but eager to give Rhett, a man she had met only hours earlier, that power.

“Perfect.” Rhett said, so quietly it was almost as if it was to himself, as he gazed down at her and continued to drag his fingernails over her nipples until they were stiff with arousal. “God, you look so fucking perfect all trussed up in my lasso.” Embarrassed by his praise, she averted her eyes as she felt her cheeks heating up but he simply pulled her chin to look back at him. “Don’t hide from me, girl. You need to know just how perfect you are.”

She had no reply, stunned speechless, only able to respond by surging upwards as much as she could to kiss him passionately. He immediately reciprocated the urgency in her kiss, his tongue parting her lips before delving deeper into her mouth. He was laying above her, hands on either side of her head supporting his weight as he wedged his knee between her thighs, pressing directly against her core. Slowly, she began grinding against it, her only way to bring even a fraction of relief to her aching cunt with her hands tied behind her back. She rocked against his knee several times before Rhett realized just what she was doing, pulling back to watch but leaving his knee in place. She wiggled and whined at the loss of his mouth against hers, helpless to do anything but continue humping his knee like a bitch in heat.

“Darlin’, you look so hot trying to ride my thigh like it’s a bull.” he growled as his blue eyes fixed on her intently.

“I’m not an expert like you, I think I might need some pointers…” she said, batting her eyelashes at him sweetly as she continued to desperately buck her hips, feeling the rough denim of his jeans even through the thin fabric of her panties.

“I think you're right, and I do believe I promised you some cowgirl lessons.” he replied smugly.

Carefully he pulled her up with him, sitting against the headboard with his legs spread obscenely as he pulled her to straddle his thigh. He reached over to the nightstand and grabbed his cowboy hat, placing it upon her head as she narrowed her eyes at him with an amused curiosity.

“Can’t ride without the hat, darlin’.” he said simply and she opened her mouth to reply but was cut off when his strong hands grabbed her hips and pulled her down onto his thigh so she would moan. “Go ahead and let me see what I’m working with.”

His hands fell from her hips to lie beside him, watching her with hungry eyes as she began to ride his thigh, chasing enough friction against her core to bring her relief. Strangely, she didn’t feel nervous or self-conscious anymore. She had thought that she’d feel silly dry humping Rhett’s jeans like a bitch in heat but when he looked at her the way he did, she just felt sexy. She bit her lip to contain her moans as she shifted her hips back and forth, up and down, and everything in between. Her head fell back slightly but she pulled back up just in time so as not to drop his hat.

“How am I doing? Passing for a cowgirl?” she asked after a minute of dragging herself against his thigh over and over again.

“You’re a natural, sweetheart.” he said, gazing up at her reverently. “Only thing I can teach you is to use your thighs too, not just your hips.”

“Like this?” she asked, continuing her movements but clenching her thighs down against his to keep herself steady.

“Perfect…” Rhett replied, leaning forwards to press sloppy kisses on her breasts as she rode, his large hands warming her skin as they returned to her hips and then traveled up her sides to assist in his assault on her breasts.

“Fuck, Rhett…” she moaned, struggling to keep her rhythm as she got ever closer to her climax, control of her body slipping away as her stamina ran out but her need increased.

Evidently, Rhett noticed her beginning to struggle, dragging his hands back down from her breasts to grab her hips and guide her movements, taking over when she was getting too close to the edge to keep it up. With his grip bruisingly hard on her hips, he helped to keep her riding through the intensely pleasurable waves of her orgasm when it hit suddenly.

“That’s it, baby. I’ve got you.” he assured her as she got lost in the feeling, throwing her head back with a loud cry, his hat flying off her head and onto the floor. She panted, her chest heaving as her orgasm ran its course.

“Good girl.” Rhett purred and despite having just cum, she felt a stirring in her core once again at those words, her body seemingly not satisfied with just the one soul-shattering orgasm.

She slumped forwards in exhaustion against his chest, unable to push herself back up with her hands still tied behind her back. He let her sit there for a moment to catch her breath, her head still spinning as he kept an arm around her waist to pull her against him and keep her grounded, his other hands stroking her hair comfortingly. When she had had enough time to reorient herself, he carefully laid her back down onto the bed, her bound arms trapped uselessly between her body and the bed once more.

She whined, wiggling in disappointment as he got up out of the bed and he paused to lean over and inspect her panties, now drenched with her cum. He traced just the tip of his finger against the fabric, chuckling when she lifted her hips to chase his hand as it retreated.

“Look at that, darlin’... fucking soaked. Even got a little on my pants.” He said before he shucked off his jeans, discarding them to the floor and returning to his place in between her legs. “Sweetheart, are you particularly attached to this pair of panties?”

“No…” she answered, her brows furrowing in confusion.

“Good. I’ll buy you a new pair.” he said, with only that serving as a warning before he literally ripped them off her and she gasped, half in surprise and half in desire. “Well if that ain’t just the prettiest little pussy I’ve ever seen.”

“Rhett, I need you…” she moaned, feeling particularly empty as admired her cunt.

“Think you’re ready for me?” he asked and she nodded vigorously, pulling his dick out of his boxers to let her see it for the first time.

Rhett smirked as her eyes widened at the sight, well aware of how above average his dick was and reveled in people’s stunned reactions when they saw it. ‘Of course’, she thought looking at his large member, ‘Rhett not only had movie star looks but he had been blessed with a porn star cock as well’. From his position kneeling between her legs, he let his cock rest on her abdomen, showing her just how deep he would go when fully seated inside of her. It was intimidating but she felt as if she’d explode if she didn’t get it inside her soon.

“You sure you’re ready for me, sweetheart?” he asked again, tapping his cock on her stomach, a bead of precum leaking from it’s head onto her overheated skin.

“Yes Rhett, please!” she whined, wiggling in her bonds desperately.

“Want me to wear a condom? I swear on my mama’s life I’m clean.” he assured her.

“I’m on the pill and I’m clean, Rhett, please just fuck me.” she begged impatiently.

“Shh darlin’...” he said quietly, amused at her desperation but still reaching down to stroke her hair out of her face. “I’m gonna take care of you, I promise. Good things come to girls who are patient, sweetheart.”

“Rhett, please let me touch you, please, please, please.” she babbled and he shushed her again.

“Alright, alright, sweetheart. Take a breath.” he said, reaching under her to untie the ropes expertly with one hand and without a minute, she was free.

Immediately, her hands went to his body, touching every inch of his bare skin that she could, surging upwards to kiss him as if his lips were the air she needed to breathe. She pulled back for air and he cupped her cheek with one hand, the other by her head holding his weight off of her.

“Ready for me, darlin’? He asked, the head of his cock resting against her entrance and she nodded vigorously. “Tell me if you need me to stop.”

He entered her slowly and she gasped, feeling suddenly as if all the air had been knocked from her lungs. Rhett moved at a glacial pace, giving her time to adjust to the feeling of his large cock stretching her open. He groaned as he felt her walls squeeze him, grunting when he finally bottomed out in her hot, wet cunt. He stayed still, giving her a minute to get used to the feeling of being stretched so deeply, resting his forehead against hers and murmuring encouragement and praise. He wiped a tear when it fell from the corner of her watering eyes and pressed a sweet kiss onto her lips, reminding her to breathe.

“You alright sweetheart?” he asked lowly and she took a breath, beginning to feel the discomfort fade and the pleasure return.

“Yes.” she said, gazing up into his blue eyes as he smiled down at her.

He began slow, pulling out almost all the way only to push back in at an agonizingly slow pace, increasing the speed just a miniscule amount with each thrust. When he bottomed out in her again after a few thrusts, she moaned and her legs went instinctively around his hips, heels digging into his ass like she was trying to keep him from pulling out.

“Faster, Rhett, please.” she moaned and he obliged, setting a steady pace as he thrust in and out.

As he sped up, she clung to him like a lifeline in the sea, tugging on his hair and raking her nails lightly (for the most part) across his back. The wet slapping noises of their bodies meeting rose in intensity, his grunts and her moans growing louder and louder until it was all she could hear. As he pounded into her, she threw her head back and closed her eyes in ecstasy. Never before had she been fucked so good and so hard and she was surprised at just how much she was loving missionary position, reveling in the intimacy of it instead of the impersonal and quick doggie style fucks most guys went for.

She could feel herself getting closer to the edge and evidently Rhett noticed too as he slipped a hand down between their bodies and rubbed circles on her clit, sending her crashing over into her third soul-crushing toe-curling orgasm of the night. Rhett wasn’t far behind, the feeling of her clamping down on his cock as she screamed in pleasure being enough to push him over the cliff, the pace of his hips stuttering as he came hard buried deep in her cunt. He groaned as he emptied himself into her, taking a moment to breathe and memorize the feeling of her around him before he pulled out and sat back on his heels. He watched in stunned awe as his cum mixed with hers, dripping out of her hole and onto the sheets.

Satisfied with himself, he smirked when he saw her staring up at the ceiling in a dazed bliss, glassy eyes and wide smile on her face. He put on his boxers and went to the bathroom for a washcloth and a glass of water. She vaguely registered him cleaning her up, coaxing her to drink from the cup and felt chaste kisses on her wrists as he confirmed she didn’t have rope burns. She had never felt so satisfied, her mind a pleasurable fog as he put his flannel shirt on her, buttoning it up before he clicked off the lamp and settled into bed beside her.

“You still with me, darlin’?” Rhett asked, pulling the sheets up to cover them both.

“Yeah… I just…” she replied, trying to force her brain to form coherent sentences instead of reveling in the post-orgasmic haze.

“Never been fucked like that by a city boy?” he asked with a grin that revealed he already knew the answer and she laughed as she turned her head to look at him, thoughts finally clearing up.

“Three orgasms in one night? No, no one’s ever done that.” she replied as he reached across her to grab her waist and hold her closer, her hand going to trail mindless patterns on his arm as she spoke. “Usually I’m lucky if I can get one that I don’t have to do myself.”

“That’s a damn crime.” Rhett said. “You deserve to be getting them morning, noon, and night… and a few in-between for good measure.”

“I gotta say you’re pretty good at pillow talk.” she replied.

“It ain’t just talk, sweetheart. You should be waking up with a mouth on your cunt every morning.” he said and she laughed, unsure if he was joking or not.

“I’ve always wanted to wake up like that.” she mused.

“Then that’s how I’ll get you up tomorrow morning.” Rhett replied and when she gazed into his blue eyes and that devilish grin, she knew he wasn’t kidding, a shiver of anticipation running down her spine.

“Careful cowboy, don’t make promises you can’t keep.” she said with a smile as she curled closer into his arms with her head on his chest, slowly letting sleep overtake her as she listened to his steady heartbeat. She was so exhausted that she wasn’t sure if she imagined him pressing a soft kiss to the top of her forehead just before she fell asleep.

She thought it was a dream at first, the feeling of a tongue lapping at her folds, a nose bumping against her clit. It felt heavenly, like she was an angel floating among the clouds, with only two strong arms anchored around her thighs to ground her and keep her tethered to reality. She sighed out a breathy little half-moan and heard a deep chuckle from the mouth at her core, the vibrations against her wet cunt only intensifying the sensations before the mouth retreated from her entirely.

“Ah, there’s my pretty little city girl wakin’ up for me.” A deep voice rasped and she opened her eyelids, still heavy with sleep, to find Rhett grinning up at her like a devil between her legs, the lower half of his face glinting with her slick.

“Rhett?” she asked sleepily. “What are you doing?”

“I promised you I’d wake you with my mouth on your cunt…” he replied. “And I always keep my promises.” He winked before licking a strip on her clit that made her throw her head back and moan.

Surprised that he was not only willing, but eager, to eat her out she moaned for him to continue. He obliged obediently, sucking at her clit as she begged for him not to stop, his strong arms anchored around her thighs to keep her wide open for him. With one hand tugging on his hair and the other gripping the sheets hard, she orgasmed, chanting his name like a prayer as she came on his face. Rhett dutifully rode her through the waves of her orgasm, smiling against her cunt as he was pleased with her pleasure. He licked one last stroke over her folds as she panted in the wake of her orgasm.

He climbed up her body to give her a hungry kiss, the taste of her still on his lips making her head spin before he pulled back.

“I think I just proved I was telling the truth when I said I’m real good at everything I do.” he said

“Are you always this humble?” she laughed.

“Modesty is overrated, sweetheart.” he replied, smiling before he kissed her once more, his fingers swiftly unbuttoning her flannel to give himself better access to her breasts. “My shirt looks better on you than it does on me… but I think it’d look even better on the floor.”

She giggled against his lips as he pulled it off of her, tossing it onto the floor as he continued to play with her breasts. His phone buzzed on the nightstand and he groaned as he rolled off her to check it.

“Fucking Perry…” he muttered and she laughed, remembering he had told her Perry was his older brother. “One sec darlin’.”

She hummed in acknowledgement, taking the time to ogle at his naked torso in the daylight. His bruise was getting worse and she was noticing more in other spots that she hadn’t seen before in the low lamp light. His bull rider tattoo on his right pec looked even better now that she could make out all the little details. She had marked him up with some hickies, no doubt in her mind that she looked much the same. Realizing she had to use the bathroom, she sat up and swung her legs over the edge, pausing to look back at Rhett when he asked where she was going.

“To the bathroom and then maybe a shower, that alright with you cowboy?” she asked sarcastically and he shook his head and smiled.

She went to stand up but her legs were too wobbly and she began to fall, Rhett lunging forwards to catch her, wrapping an arm around her waist and hauling her back up onto the bed, now sitting right behind her. He laughed and she could feel his chest rumbling against her back, clearly proud of himself for contributing to her current state.

“Not funny, Rhett.” she scolded, shaking her head as she was unable to stop herself from smiling.

“You seem to very clumsy sweetheart, that’s twice now I’ve caught you while you’re falling.” he joked. “Maybe I make you a little weak at the knees, huh?”

“Asshole.” she laughed, shoving him away before he swept her off her feet and began walking her to the bathroom, her arms quickly flying around his neck.

He carried her to the bathroom, depositing her on the toilet before stepping to the sink to get a drink. After she finished her business, she stuck her head out the door and batted her eyelashes at him.

“Wanna join me in the shower, cowboy?” she asked coyly and he smirked as she crooked a finger towards him.

“I believe I’m obliged to, someone needs to keep you from slipping and falling again on your shaky little legs.” he joked as he walked to the shower and turned it on.

She should have known that having just an innocent shower was impossible with Rhett Abbott. What started as him washing her back quickly turned sexual when his hands wandered down to her ass and she found herself yet again being railed within an inch of her life by him. Afterwards, she shooed him off so she could wash her hair without him trying to seduce her again and once he ensured that she could stand on her own with a cheeky little smile, he hopped out to get dressed while she finished her shower. When she walked out of the bathroom covered only by a towel, Rhett tried to steal her it to make her laugh before they began making out once more.

“I wish I could just spend all day between your legs.” he groaned, trying to pull himself away from her so he didn’t do just that. “I could show you all the different uses for my lasso that are way better than roping cattle.”

“Tempting offer but I think my brother would break down the door thinking I was in trouble if I didn't come out.” she said with a laugh as she patted his chest and playfully pushed him away. “Speaking of which, you’d better get out of here before he comes to pick me up.”

She quickly got dressed, spying him slipping her ripped panties from the previous night into his back pocket with a cheeky smile out of the corner of her eye.

“Excuse me sir, are you stealing my panties?” she asked with a laugh.

“Well ma’am, I have to know what size and brand to get you for a replacement.” he replied smugly. “That’s all it is.”

“Oh, that’s all is it?” she asked, raising her eyebrows in amusement as she pulled him against her by his belt. “It wouldn’t be because you want a souvenir of your conquest? Because I don’t think it’s very fair that you get one and I don’t.”

“Well, I could give you my boxers but going commando for a day of ranch work might be a little painful.” he said and she shook her head. “So, how about this as a souvenir?” Rhett asked as he placed his hat on her head.

“So if cowboy law says that a girl taking a cowboy’s hat and putting it on her head means she’s going home with him, what does a cowboy taking off his hat and putting it on her head mean?” she asked and he smirked.

“You’ll have to find out by going out with me again tonight.” he replied.

“Hmm.” she said, pretending to think about his offer. “I guess I might be free tonight for some more lessons. Besides, I told you last night that I wanted to get my mouth on your cock and I still haven't so I have some promises to keep too…”

“Damn it woman, you’re really gonna make it real hard for me to leave aren't you?” he asked and she laughed.

“I’m certainly making something hard.” she said with a smirk as she trailed a hand down to palm his hardening bulge before stepping away to open the door in feigned innocence. “See you tonight, cowboy.”

“Can I get your number before I go, darlin’?” he asked as he stepped out the door and a sly smile grew on her face.

“Check your shirt pocket.” she said with a smirk and a wink before closing the door, leaving him dumbfounded on her doorstep when he reached into the pocket of his flannel and pulled out a slip of paper with her number on it, knowing that he’d truly met his match.

Looking through the peephole, she watched him walk towards his truck, a slight spring in his step. She could hear him whistling even through the door and down the hall and she laughed when she realized that it was the same song that had been playing when he fingered her in the cab of his truck, the same one he had been humming when he had been tying her up.

Peering out the curtains of the window, she watched him drive away, her brother’s truck passing Rhett’s exiting one as he entered the parking lot and she could swear that she saw her brother staring Rhett down through the windshield. Quickly, she got dressed and ready to go before heading down to the parking lot, deciding to leave Rhett’s hat on her head to mess with her brother. Sam was checking his phone when she hopped in the front seat, Jenna and the kids in the back seat.

“Good morning!” she said cheerfully and he nodded as he glanced over at her, returning his eyes to the wheel before they shot open in surprise and he had to do a double take.

“Whose hat is that?” he asked sternly. “That had better not be Rhett Abbott’s.”

“In an attempt to stop you from having a heart attack, I’m choosing not to answer that question.” she replied, barely able to hide her smug smirk at her brother’s panic.

“Good for you, girl!” Jenna cried, leaning forwards from the backseat between her children’s car seats to pat her sister-in-law on the shoulder. “Domesticate that wild cowboy.”

“No!” Sam said quickly, turning to look at his wife in stunned disbelief. “There will be no ‘domesticating’ any cowboys, especially not Rhett Abbott.”

“We’ll talk later…” Jenna mouthed to Y/N with a wink as she sat back in her seat.

Sam sighed grumpily, his face contorting into a frown as he shifted gears and pulled the truck out of the parking lot and down the road towards their ranch.

“Auntie Y/N, can I be the flower girl at the wedding?” Sarah asked suddenly from the back seat and Sam just about jumped out of his skin.

“WHAT?” he panickedly sputtered, Jesse laughing at his dad’s reaction. “Sarah Ann Y/L/N, what are you talking about?”

“Wearing someone else’s hat means that you like like them.” Sarah replied, cheerfully. “Chrissy and the older girls told me that her big sister was wearing a guy’s hat and the next week they got married!”

“If there’s a wedding, do I have to wear my sunday clothes?” Jesse whined. “I hate them, they’re so itchy!”

“No one is wearing sunday clothes because no one is getting married!” Sam insisted, his wife and sister struggling not to laugh at how virulently against even the suggestion of his little sister marrying the so-called “manwhore of Wabang”.

Y/N was so amused that she didn’t even try to reassure her brother that she was not going to be getting married after one date, but she also didn’t mention her second date with Rhett later that evening, deciding to give his heart a rest for a while as she thought about what cowgirl lessons Rhett might teach her that night.

[jungle-angel]

Tell Me What You Need (Bob Floyd x Reader)

Summary: You’ve had a really rough day, but Bob’s always there to give you a hand

Tagging: @rhettabbotts @nobody7102 @sebsxphia​

Notes: One day it’s an explosion of Rhett Abbott content, next thing you know, the Bob content explodes. If anybody has any ideas for the rest of the daggers, please, send it in!!! (lol). 

You awoke abruptly upon hearing the cries of tiny little Auggie and the jingling of the tags on Tank’s collar, the burly Rottweiler whimpering as he began circling the bassinette next to the couch. You were utterly exhausted, hardly able to catch a moment of sleep since bringing him home. 

Your joints popped a little as you lifted yourself off the couch, heavy headed and your eyes stinging from lack of water and lack of sleep. You and Bob knew you were in it for the long haul when you brought Auggie home from the hospital, still very tiny after having been born prematurely. You tried to rock his little form in your arms but his cries and whimpers grew louder. Soon, the tears started to flow from your eyes, overwhelmed with the feeling that you weren’t doing enough for your precious little son. 

Just as the thought had crossed your mind, the front door opened and in came Bob. Tank rushed to greet his master, his nails scraping against the hardwood floors. “Babes?” he called out. 

“In the living room,” you croaked. 

One look at your face and Bob knew that you were overwhelmed. “Sweetheart, what happened?” he asked, helping you to sit back down on the sofa. 

“I haven’t had any time to eat or sleep,” you told him, your voice cracking with the emotion that threatened to burst forth.  “Auggie’s been awake most of the day and I can’t catch a break.” 

“Has he eaten?” 

“I haven’t given him the night bottle yet,” you admitted. “All day, I was trying to get him to latch and he wouldn’t.” 

“Here,” Bob told you. “Give him to me and then go get yourself something to eat. I’ve got this.” 

Carefully you placed Auggie into his arms, the tiny little baby fitting perfectly into the curves of Bob’s arms, those arms that were made for holding. Bob followed you into the kitchen as you prepped a small bottle for your son, one that the nurses had sent home with you. Bob did what he could to feed Auggie, hoping that after some rest, you would be able to try and get him to latch on again. 

Out of the fridge, you took the container of leftover spaghetti and marinara sauce, heating it up with extra mozzarella before you dug right in. You felt much better after having eaten, warmed at the sight of your son in the arms of his father. You blushed a little as Bob’s voice softly whispered sweet nothings to the tiny little one in his arms as Auggie sucked down his bottle. It was only fifteen minutes before Auggie was done, his belly full with milk and his eyelids drooping shut as Bob kissed his cheeks. 

“Oh my boy, you did so good,” he cooed. “Your Momma’s gonna be so happy.” 

As soon as you had a chance, you cleared away the dishes and took Auggie from Bob’s arms. “Listen Bob.....” 

“Nope, (y/n) don’t even think about apologizing,” he insisted. “I understand.” 

“I was gonna say thank you,” you chuckled. 

Bob giggled a little when you kissed his cheek, drawing you and the baby right into his arms, flush against him as his warmth radiated to the three of you. There would always be a day where you thanked high heaven that Bob was yours and you were Bob’s. 

[princessmisery666]

PM666Reads - Fic Recs - December 2022

This is my 4th attempt at posting this!! Sorry for the delay!!

Summary and warning’s as per written by the author (if available).

To the authors - thank you for putting in the work 💕no one gets enough recognition so thank you for taking the time to write and being brave enough to share it with us 💟

📖Steve Rogers

Steve's Greetings - Steve Rogers - @girl-next-door-writes

Driving Home for Christmas - @cockslutpadalecki - You’ve been avoiding spending any special occasion with your father ever since Steve became part of the family, but after many years of excuses, you find yourself back at home, and very much the subject of Steve’s affections.Warnings: stepcest, step-sibling relationship, explicit sexual content, female masturbation, hate masturbation :), semi-public sexual acts, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it kids), 18+. MINORS DNI.

Chef's Kiss - @cockslutpadalecki - Warnings: non-con/dub-con, mean!Steve, explicit sexual content, non-con sexual contact, makeshift gag, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it kids), 18+. MINORS DNI.

📖Mickey 'Fanboy' Garcia

The Nap Date - @writercole - You and Mickey have been missing each other for a week and arrange to have a special kind of inside date. Warnings: Fluff. Innuendo. Fluff.

It's A Date - @writercole - After the doppelganger debate, the squad goes out to The Hard Deck. Warnings: Fluff. That’s about it. Oh, and Penny is the best.

📖Robert 'Bob' Floyd

Bob x reader in the base library - @lorecraft

Decorating Cookies - @wildbornsiren - You and Bob spend an afternoon decorating cookies. Warnings: Use of terms of endearment. Fluff. 

Spit Roasting - @wildbornsiren - Hangman and Bob have a proposition. Warnings: Threesome, unprotected sex, vaginal fingering, vaginal sex, oral sex (male receiving) oral sex (female receiving), swallowing, creampie. 

📖Rhett Abbott

Ice Skating - @rhettabbotts

📖Dean Winchester

On The Outside - @justagirlinafandomworld - To get Dean to say yes to Michael, they sent him to the Endverse. And when that didn’t work, they turned to you. Warnings: Time travel, time jumps, ANGST. Language. Endverse!Dean.

Mess - @justagirlinafandomworld - You learn the side effects of sex pollen first hand. Bucky doesn’t know what to do. But Dean does. Warnings: 18+ ONLY. Language.Sex pollen. Oral Sex (Female Receiving). First time writing for: Established polyamory & DD/LG relationship.

Thoughts Of Her - @kittenofdoomage -  Dean Winchester fantasizing about reader. Warnings: daydreaming, pillow humping, accidental voyeurism

The Girlfriend Who Remade Christmas - @deanwinchesterswitch - Dean’s holiday spirit is nowhere to be found. Fed up with his Grinch-like behavior, Nicole is determined to open his heart again to the wonders of the world around them and help him find joy in the Christmas season. Warnings: FLUFF, a tiny bit of angst, implied smut, slight canon divergence

Auto Correct - @justagirlinafandomworld - You’re in a debate with Dean over text message. And auto correct happens. Warnings: Second hand embarrassment maybe. Otherwise, none.

If We Make It Through December - @minefield-of-a-ninja - Donna is horrified to learn that the boys have never had a proper Christmas, so she invites them to her house for the holiday. Warnings/tags: explicit (eventually), fluff (? Idk), angst (? light), domestic (can’t get much more domestic)

Snow Globe - @waywardnerd67 - Headed back from a hunt, Dean pulls over when it starts snowing. Warnings: Fluff

Breaking - @dean-winchester-is-a-warrior - Y/N and Dean play some pool; who's the winner? Warnings/Explicit 18+: Smut - this is just all smut. Very little plot to the porn here. Rough, intense sex, unprotected p in v, oral (f receiving) dirty talk, it's all Yvette's fault.

📖Jake 'Hangman' Seresin

The Best Benefits - @writercole - Jake found her. Now what’s he going to do? Warnings: Physical assault, confession of feelings, lying

All For You - @cockslutpadalecki - You’ll never be able to tell Jake just how broken you truly are without him. Just how much you still love him. And the constant cycle of pushing him away before begging for his touch at 2am will never end until you can. Warnings: heavy angst, smangst, lots of sexual tension, explicit sexual content, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it kids), 18+. MINORS DNI.

Gather 'Round - @t-nd-rfoot - Jake is a fire man! Oh no, sorry, not that kind of fireman…

📖Sam Winchester

Cleaning House - @kittenofdoomage - waiting for the bunker’s washing machine to be done. Warnings: smut, fluff

Tattered series - @stusbunker - Warnings, etc: True mates, still in varying first person POVs, Bobby’s not putting up with their bullshit, angst, heat sex, multiple claims means the boys need to learn to share. Bodily fluids, anal play, anal sex, vaginal sex, knotting, fucking someone while your brother’s fucking them, so both awkward and maybe a little competitive? This is my first brother threeway, you’re welcome.

📖Jensen Ackles

Surrender - @b3autyfuldisast3r - Reader is a PA on the set of Big Sky and falls in love with Jensen - who is married. Will she give in to her feelings and destroy a relationship or hide them and risk destroying herself? Warnings: 🔞, Angst, SMUT, Language, Kissing, Hair pulling, Choking, Fingering, Oral (F receiving), Degradation, Unprotected sex (slap a rubber on that shit), Cream pie. DO NOT READ IF YOU'RE UNDER 18. This was LONG, whew!

Sweetness - @katymacsupernatural - Readers love of candy canes drives Jensen to distraction

[slashingdisneypasta]

MultiVillain x Reader || Drabbles

Plot: Okay, so this is how it goes. Reader’s in love with (Villain), and (Villain) is in love with them… but no one ever said it out loud, and now Reader is marrying someone else.

Includes: Napoleon Boneparte (Misc), Human!Oogie Boogie (Disney Villain), Oswald Cobblepot (Gotham), Slenderman (Creepypasta), The Clown (Horror Villains)

Warnings: Alcohol intake, talk and hints towards murder of course, and swearing. 

Notes:

Inspired by ‘Marry Me’ (Either by Thomas Rhett [The guy’s POV which is what this will be in] or Elle Mears [Your POV, if you wanna see how Reader’s thinking]) and I recommend you listen while you read! ^^

I’m so happy!! I finally wrote something more then headcanons for Oogie! And this is also my first time writing for the Clown, so be easy on me XD

I hope you like this- I for one, am actually pretty proud of it! 

~~~

Napoleon Boneparte (You’re having a nighttime wedding- you made this decision of course so your friend and secret soulmate could attend):

She wants to get married, she wants it perfect She wants her grandaddy preaching the service Yeah, she wants magnolias out in the country Not too many people, save her daddy some money

Before walking into the church, I halt a moment at the side so others may get inside by me. This will be hard. I need a moment, just a moment… to pull myself together. It would be very bad, if I were to panic as Y/N makes their way down the aisle.

Hand on the church, more to hold myself together rather then to hold myself up. Am I doing the right thing? Should I be here? Should I leave? That stupid Capone said I might not be able to control myself and will object when the preacher asks… he’s not right, is he? It’s true, I don’t feel entirely under my own control right now…. But I need to be here. To support Y/N on their big day.

… I do love them, far more than any man every should a nearly married person, and even if I can’t have them for myself, I would, happy, do very near anything to make them happy.

So, if… If they want me here, as they said they do… Then I have to go in. I can’t chicken out now. I am the great Napoleon Boneparte. I can attend a wedding. Bon dieu.

Viva La France.

I can do this.

Forward!

As soon as I walk in, it is as if I am strolling into Y/N’s mind. This is just as they always wanted, with a few obvious added things by the other one that’s getting married today, like the chiselled cat head mahogany chairs… not that I think Y/N would disapprove if they weren’t, in fact, kind enough to just agree right away, seeing as it isn’t only their day.

The white makes a beautiful backdrop for their chosen accent colour, and the people in the room are exactly who I would imagine to accompany Y/N in her daily life, when I cannot be there. There’s not a sour, or in any way unexcited and unencouraging expression in the place.

Honestly, with my whole heart, wish I could feel the same as them.

Then Y/N comes into the room, and steals the breath right out of my chest. Like always.

Human!Oogie Boogie:

Ooh, she got it all planned out Yeah, I can see it all right now

I'll wear my black suit, black tie, hide out in the back I'll do a strong shot of whiskey straight out the flask

Christ, what kinda shindig is this?? I’ve asked everyone and their cat, including somebodies’ mother who looks like a cat, to play a tiny game of Blackjack with me while we wait for the main event, but nothing! Nada! What’s wrong with these people? Are they dying to just sit around and contemplate their loneliness until the two hosts get hitched??

I, for one, am not playing that game today.

Of course, I’m also avoiding Y/N at all costs so maybe I’m not the best example of a man controlling his emotions.

“Oogie!”

My shoulders seize up visibly, at Y/N’s voice behind me and I stop shuffling my cards. I only decide to turn around and face them like a man, when they give up waiting and round me so I can see their beaming face.

Oh, they look so happy.

That’s nice… in a terrible, heartbreaking, awful kind of way.

“Heya, Y/N. You look great!” I start shuffling the cards again in my hand, distracting my hands from and refraining myself from, taking their hand and kissing it, or pulling them into a hug. If I did that, I think theirs an acute possibility I would end up saying something we would both regret, in a moment of determination… and devastation, of course. Can’t forget that.

Really, I can’t. It’s a very prominent feeling right now in my chest, just being here. Just knowing this is happening.

“Thank you!” They beam wider, and oh Jesus. They’re so beautiful when they look happy- I wish I could make them this happy.

… But that’s all the other guy. The one they’re hitching.

They run their bottom lip through their teeth, looking down at the cards in my hands and then smirking in that mischievous way that always somehow makes this blackheart’s insides clench up. In a good way, but still. Tilting their head, they look back up at my face. “Had no luck getting anyone to bet with you yet?”

I let out a deep, theatrical sigh full of frustration. “No! Your guests all suck, Y/N.”

“Even you?”

“No, not me. I’m the King.”

“Right,” They laugh, then goes and sits down at a nearby table. “Well we have 10 minutes until I have to go get ready to walk- I’ll play you if you want!”

My heart pops like a balloon, and goes flying, wheezing around in my rib cage as I just smile at them for a good moment- unmarried, and free, and mine. For ten to fifteen more minutes. Hell yeah, I’m going to sit down and play with them.

Why aren’t I telling them not to? I wonder, as I deal us both cards and they pick theirs up and make cheeky ‘Hmmm’ sounds to throw me off. Why don’t I tell them, right now, how I feel? Why am I doing this to myself? Why am I here, is also a valid question but I already beat myself up over that last night when I was picking out my tie. I’m her friend, and they deserve to be… yuck. Happy, with the person they chose.

And I guess, that’s the answer to all my other questions too.

Let me just enjoy this last game, this last 600 seconds with them.

Oswald Cobblepot:

I remember the night when I almost kissed her Yeah, I kinda freaked out, we'd been friends for forever And I always wondered if she felt the same way When I got the invite, I knew it was too late

And I know her daddy's been dreading this day Oh, but he don't know he ain't the only one giving her away

As soon as Y/N leaves my side to go and freshen up for the aisle walk, I find myself a seat in the very back of the church / auditorium and rest in for the event. I will not be moving from this hidden away spot, in convenient shadow, with my secret flask of terrible smelling stuff that Victor gave me before arriving, until this shitshow is over and I can leave.

I’m only here in the first place, because Y/N asked me. And, evidently, my idiocy runs deep because I accepted such an invitation. I will do anything, for them. I learnt my lesson in dealing in peoples love lives, with Edward and Isobel- I will not let my relationship with Y/N go as badly as that one did, with Ed.

So if I must sit here and watch them marry that moron, (Fiancé’s Name), then that is what I’ll do. But I won’t sit in the front and watch it, and I will be as drunk as whatever this drink can make me.

Maybe I should text Victor, the deadly assassin, and ask what the contaminants are…

An unevolved, ap-like woman walks past my seat and I must be too close to the aisle because I can hear her yap like a strangled cat about what a cute couple Y/N and (Fiancé’s Name) are together and how they must be soulmates, and I don’t think twice before gulping down a huge mouthful of the alcohol. If this is how I die, then so be it, I think bitterly as I slide further down the aisle.

“Fuck!” The word comes out of me before I can stop it, my face probably the picture of horror and disgust. This… drink, if I can even call it that -more of an undiluted acid, if you ask me, - tastes like regret and earwax.

The same ape-like woman from before flashes a stern, disapproving look at me like she thinks she’s my mother, and I show her my middle finger. Uncouth, yes, but affective. This is a bad day, and I am in no mood to deal with bitches like her. She quickly looks away, and I take another, smaller, sip of the drink.

Another moment passes and the wedding doesn’t seem to be even a second closer to ending, so I sit up straight and close my eyes, holding the flask in my lap. Take me back to a better time…

In the silent, middle-of-the-conversation lapse moment, I allow myself to look down at Y/N’s mouth. They have a soft smile, left over from whatever we were just talking about, on their face as they sit comfortably in our silence and I suddenly feel total confidence. They’re here, with me, instead of off with that boy toy / girl toy / gender neutral or fluid toy. They’re with me. That must mean that I mean something to them, right? And Ed said they looked at me like… like, they love me. Or ‘care deeply’, as he put it. But we all know that was just his stiff version of the word ‘love’. Ever since Isobel… had her unfortunate accident… he’s been focused on one emotion only and it is not, love.

Anyway, the confidence spreads through me and I smile. It mixes with my perpetual desire to kiss them, and goddamnit, I should do it. I should just lean over and press a gentle kiss on their mouth- if they aren’t interested or pull away, I can blame it on the wine between us. If not…

Butterflies erupt in my stomach and my chest, and I’ve just lean an inch forward… when their phone rings on the table and I see (Boyfriends Name) flash on the screen.

I rush to lean completely back in my chair, as they answer. I don’t like to believe fate has anything to do with Gotham, but… that was entirely too close.

My eyes snap open and I roll my shoulders back, inhaling another, bigger slug of the contents of the flask and feel even angrier.

That was, most certainly not a better time, you nitwit.

Slenderman:

Bet she got on her dress now, welcoming the guests now

I could try to find her, get it off of my chest now But I ain't gonna mess it up, so I'll wish her the best now

I’ve been sitting in the back of this church, a place I likely shouldn’t ever enter in the first place -Well, at least I’m not Offender. I would probably burn to death, in that scenario, - for over 2 hours and I only got to see Y/N for 45 and a half minutes of that time.

Not that that really matters. Its more important that they see me. I certainly don’t want to see them. I don’t wish to see them, or their wedding clothes, or their wedding guests, or the stupid moony smiles on their faces, or the cake, or their partner. Definitely not their partner. If they show their face before they absolutely have to, or worse, talk to me, I will promptly go home and kill 30 people. I don’t want to be here.

I shouldn’t be here, in fact. If I were a good man, I wouldn’t be here. A good man would never turn up to a wedding that he know’s he’s just going to sit back in and think unholy, too-fond and too-angry thoughts about one of the marriage participants. Marriage is supposedly a sacred thing, and if I were this good man that I’m thinking about, I wouldn’t urinate on it like this.

But I am not a good man.

So, really, what would I know about what a good man, would do in the first place?

Enough thinking about good men, it’s making me queasy and very uncomfortable.

I don’t look around, but I can infer with general certainty, that Y/N will be welcoming all her other guests now that I ‘allowed’ -Not that I could have stopped them. They just didn’t want to leave me in my own company,- them to let me be alone here. And they’re in their wedding clothes, which look lovely on them, and their smiling and their giddy.

Giddy. Ugh, I hate that word, especially in this sense. Defined by the Cambridge English Dictionary as ‘feeling silly, happy, and excited and showing this in your behaviour’. And by the Oxford, to ‘Make (Someone) feel excited to the point of disorientation.’. Yes, I looked up these definitions and memorised them before I came, and loathe every single word, in that order.

Because apparently, as if it wasn’t already obvious by the very fact that I’m HERE, I hate myself.

This other person has made Y/N giddy, while I have to sit here and pretend, I’m happy for them both and that I don’t feel like vomiting for the first time in 5 centuries.

But I can’t do anything about it, because I love them, Y/N, and I will… I will not, allow myself to be the reason their wedding wasn’t perfect. So, I wish them the best.

Or I try my damn hardest to.

The Clown / Jeffry Hawk / Kenneth Chase:

So I'm in my black suit, black tie, hiding out in the back Doing a strong shot of whiskey straight out the flask I'll try to make it through without crying so nobody sees Yeah, she wanna get married Yeah, she gonna get married But she ain't gonna marry me

I don’t know if I’d call this a real wedding. For one, its in the entities realm so how ‘magical’ could it really be? And for another reason, the only white thing here is my grease paint. Its pretty laughable. I would laugh, in fact, if I didn’t know it would cause a coughing fit and bring attention to me as Y/N walks down the aisle- O don’t need them looking at me. I might accidentally blurt out an ‘oopsie’ or something not-at-all funny like that, with all the whiskey I’ve injected today. Not that that would be the biggest issue with these kids seeing that I’m here, in the first place. Only Y/N knows, I’m hiding by a tree.  

But, I digress I guess. They’re calling it a wedding. The big one with the beard is officiating -I guess he has an online certificate from before he was brought here,- , Y/N’s wearing a pit of plastic bag on their head like a make shift veil / bit of plastic bag fashioned sort of like a tie, and all the lovely little fingers, or survivors as they like to call themselves, watch. With silly gleaming smiles and hope in their eyes- Pft, suckers.

Honestly the idea of weddings in the first place make me a bit uncomfortable. All those wide eyes watching and perving on your happiness?? Seems pretty creepy to me, and I’ve been told I’m pretty creepy myself! So, I would know!

The fact that possibly the sweetest, perfect person I’ve ever had the pleasure of setting my gaze upon is the one getting married, has absolutely no stake on my take on weddings in this moment.

Absolutely not…

Aha… hahahaha…

I kill myself.

I kill them, too, but let’s put that on the backburner like their fingers, for now.

Let me wallow in self-pity for a while longer before we start making jokes.

Yeah, let me… I take a swig of my flask -a bee-oootiful concoction of all the most toxic hootch I have in my collection, and maybe also some actual poison maybe since I wasn’t paying much attention when I created it this morning and I keep it all in relatively the same place, - and savour the horrible flavour on my tongue. Let me wallow, for a little bit.

This is going to be a bad day, for these little fuckers when I get into the game.

[mythicalsecretsanta]

I like you like this (G)

This gift is for: Lesley (AKA @les342) Happy Holidays!! :D you said you like some fluff so I wrote you some fluff. I’m a little rusty :-S but I hope you like it!  From your Secret Santa, Sims (AKA @afangirlsplaylist)

Read below:

A bright, hazy morning (along with the hard back of his chair) awoke Link. Instinctively his right hand reached out toward the air as if to touch his wife - but it wasn’t until he felt nothing that he remembered where he was.

Rubbing the sleep out of his eyes, he looked around the hospital room groggily - taking in the form of his sleeping wife and the larger person sitting in the armchair with his new baby daughter. It was some time before he could take in anything else thanks to the startling whiteness of the room, but once he had he turned his attention to his daughter and best friend.

Lily was nestled happily in her uncle’s (for it was an unspoken fact that this was what they would be to each other’s kids) arms. He had to stop himself from chuckling at the awkward way Rhett was holding his overly large arm around her, as if he were a gentle giant trying not to crush something in their hand. 

He settled for leaning back with a small, contented smile on his face. “Morning, Mclaughlin.”

Rhett looked over briefly, still rocking the small girl in his arms. “Finally awake, huh?”

Link just rolled his eyes - betrayed by the touch of a smile still lingering on his face. “You just wait till Jessie’s going through labour, man. You’ll be insufferable.”

Rhett didn’t argue, turning his eyes back to the bundle in his arms. Link noticed his gaze was both focused and far away at the same time - perhaps thinking of that moment himself. Absentmindedly he reached for her hand, with his one hand holding the tiny fingers of hers.

There was silence for several minutes - all except for their breathing and the soft rustle of Christy’s blankets. Link’s eyes fixed themselves onto Rhett and his daughter, still staring at the two like he was watching a beloved show from his childhood. Even with the exhaustion his daughter was still one of the greatest, unbelievable things he’d ever seen.

He didn’t notice how much he’d been staring until Rhett looked up and met his eye. “What are you staring at?”

Link shook his head, catching himself a little. “I don’t know.” He answered honestly.  “I just like seeing you this way. I’d almost think you were sweet.” 

“I’m the sweetest.” Rhett joked - earning an eye roll from his friend.

As the sun ray’s illuminated Rhett’s golden curls and the small pink fingers of his daughter’s hand, Link sighed tiredly - blinking away sleep in an effort not to break the moment.

“This really is nice though.”

Rhett didn’t joke this time, cradling Lily a little closer to his body. “It really is.”

Knowing he had to get up or risk falling asleep again, Link got up out of his chair quickly - stretching and walking over toward the two. Without a word he put one hand on Rhett’s shoulder, rubbing it gently.

“I’m serious though. This really is nice.” Link repeated, wrapping one arm fully around Rhett now while being careful not to constrict Lily. “I love you guys”

Rhett raised one hand to pat the back of the arm around him, as if to say I love you too. 

They stayed this way as Christy stirred in her bed, choosing not to speak as she awoke to the sight of her boys and daughter. In her mind she took a mental picture of the three of them, storing it in her subconscious even as she turned around and closed her eyes again. 

She was asleep before they could know she’d been awake.

[chilling-seavey]

Anything But Mine - The Wedding

A/N This was highly requested as a blurb but it needed it’s own full post as it is almost 5k words and it holds a special place in my heart <3

Note: Daniel and Florence’s wedding song is Blessed by Thomas Rhett. Please click the link and give it a listen because it speaks absolute volumes to their relationship and it’s so special to them!

Saturday, October 14th, 2023

Daniel was always good at finding instruments to play in the strangest of places. This morning in particular, at around noon, he found himself in the upstairs hallway of the old historical castle, his fingers dancing delicately over the keys of the grand piano, filling the stone building with a soft melody. He was dressed in a full suit and tie, ironed and styled to perfection down to his shiny black dress shoes, his dark hair combed and styled in a soft part and hair sprayed enough for it to stay put for the rest of the day and then some. A gentle smile was playing at his lips, his blue eyes seeming to catch the warm light of the midday sun that was spilling through the stained glassed window beside him and streaking across the old wooden floors.

Footsteps sounded down the hall and Daniel glanced up to see Corbyn headed towards him.

“I can never lose you. I just have to follow the music.” his best friend tisked, making Daniel crack a goofy grin as he played on. Corbyn leaned over the side of the piano, trying carefully not to crease his own suit. He simply watched him play for a little longer before Daniel dropped his hands to his lap. The final notes died out slowly, echoing off the old stone walls of the castle.

“How are you feeling?” Corbyn asked.

“Antsy.” Daniel said lightly, his leg bouncing restlessly off the side of the bench he sat on. He let his gaze drift out the stained-glass window, the brightly coloured fall trees filling the streets below them making the city seem a bit warmer. “What time is it?”

Corbyn glanced at his watch, “12:10. You still have two hours.”

Daniel sighed deeply, turning back to his friend, “I don’t think I can wait that long, bro.”

“Well you gotta. The girls are still getting ready.” Corbyn chuckled. “But your flower girls are demanding to see you. That’s why I’m up here.”

At simply the mention of his daughters, Daniel broke into a grin and he got up from the piano to start towards the stairs.

“They’re in our room with the guys.” Corbyn said, following him down the spiral staircase. Daniel seemed to navigate the winding corridors with ease – probably since he couldn’t stand still since he finished getting ready at 10:30 that morning – and he got back to their room with Corbyn a mess of confusion behind him.

The rest of their friend group were still in there hanging out after finishing getting ready along with Daniel’s two brothers and his dad. Clementine and Penelope were in the center of the room, demanding all of the attention from the men in their knee length light pink dresses and white stockings, looking no less than the cutest girls anyone had ever seen.

“My girls.” Daniel smiled, as he walked inside, bending down to their height as they rushed over to hug him. “You two look absolutely gorgeous.”

He tugged lightly at the brushed-out ringlets in their hair.

“We got makeup, Daddy!” Clementine beamed, pointing to her eyes where, sure enough, a thin coat of sparkly eye shadow and mascara framed each pair of bright blue eyes.

“Well, aren’t you two all grown up.” Daniel chuckled.

“Just a little.” Penelope said as if to reassure him.

“Yeah.” Clementine agreed with her younger sister. “Mommy said okay but just a little and Auntie Anna helped do it.”

“It looks very pretty.” Daniel said, looking between his two beaming daughters. He stood up from the ground and picked up Penelope to set on his hip and right away she leaned on his shoulder. “What did you need to see me for?”

“Oh!” Clementine ran across the room to the coffee table set up in the corner and she grabbed something from it before running back over to him. She held up a small envelope. “Mommy wanted me to give you this. It was a special mission. Only I could do it.”

“Sounds important.” Daniel smiled, taking it from her with his free hand that wasn’t holding the three-year-old. “Do you want another special mission, Miss Clementine?”

“Yes!” she squealed.

Daniel gave Penelope the envelope to hold so he could reach into his inside jacket pocket to pull out his own letter. He passed it down to the young girl who beamed at the sight of it as she held it in her two hands.

“Make sure Mommy gets this. No one else, okay?” Daniel instructed.

“Yessir!” Clementine nodded before running out of the room. The quick clicks of her Mary Janes could be heard disappearing down the hallway.

Daniel looked to Penelope in his arms, as he took the envelope back from her tiny grip, “You want to go with your sister?”

Her little head shake made him smile and he pressed a kiss to her head as she wrapped her arms around his neck and cuddled into him. He told the room that he would be right back before he walked out again, his youngest falling asleep on his shoulder. Penelope seemed to be a sense of calm to him as walking down the hallway felt so much easier with her.

Daniel found a small bench over-looking the garden below and he sat down, leaning against the wall so Penelope could still nap comfortably against him. He kept his arms on either side of the sleeping child to make sure she wouldn’t fall as he held the small white envelope in his hands, the contents inside personally written from the bride.

His name always looked so much nicer when it was written by her.

When he turned it over, a soft pink lipstick mark was pressed to the seal and he smiled at the sight of her sitting by the window over looking the castle gardens in a long white dress and pressing a kiss to that very envelope. He could almost hear her soft giggle at her own ridiculousness.

Daniel slid his finger along the seal in order to pull out the small sheet of cardstock. The black ink scrawled crisply over the high-end parchment and he held it carefully in his two hands as if he was holding priceless artwork.

Penelope shifted against his shoulder and he set one hand on her back securely as he began reading.

My dearest Daniel,

How long has it been that we’ve awaited this day? It already feels like a lifetime. Every day spent with you brings so much brightness to my world and I truly cannot imagine a life without you by my side. You have always been my confidant, my protector, my best friend, and my one true love. You live so passionately yet carefully, thinking through every action before doing and always putting everyone else before you. Especially our girls. Clementine and Penelope are so blessed to be able to call you their father, and I am even more blessed to soon be able to call you my husband. It still sounds so surreal. We’ve been awaiting this day for exactly 5 years now, even if we might not have known it at first. Every obstacle led us here, all the heartache, the tears, the laughter, and the late-night talks – and I wouldn’t change one thing. This is our story. It may have been five years in the making but it starts today.

I love you more than life itself, and I will every day forward.

Yours forever,

Florence

~~

Clementine came skidding into the bridal suite, her dress shoes shrieking against the floor.

“Clementine Ophelia, you’re going to hurt yourself.” Florence tisked, holding out her arm to catch her rambunctious daughter running for her at top speed as she sat at the dressing table getting the finishing touches on her hair.

“I have an important message for you, Mommy!” Clementine said, bouncing on her toes as she held onto Florence’s white dress tightly with one fist, her other waving the envelope in her face.

“Thank you, angel.” Florence took it from her with a cheesy grin and gently pried her four-and-a-half-year old’s hand from her dress. “Now go sit with Uncle Callum and calm down, please.”

Clementine skipped across the room to Callum who was sitting on the couch with Daniel’s mum.

“What’s that?” Anna asked through a teasing smile, pinning the last bit of the soft white flower into her curls.

Florence grinned down at the letter in her hand, “You know what it is.”

“A love letter from my brother.” Anna sang softly as she picked up the hairspray. “Hold your breath.”

Florence closed her eyes gently and took a deep breath, holding the envelope safely against her chest as Anna sprayed at least half the can of hairspray onto her curls. The girls coughed a little together when she was finished, waving their hands in the air.

“Well, my dear, you look like an angel on earth.” Anna said proudly.

“Thank you so much.” Florence sighed, welcoming her soon to be sister-in-law into a hug.

“You’re most welcome. We’ll go downstairs to make sure everything is going smoothly…and you so can read your mushy letter.” Anna said, ushering everyone out of the room.

Florence took a small breath through her wide smile, catching her own eye in the mirror nearby. She hardly recognised herself…but in the best way. Anna really knew what she was doing. Her blonde hair fell in soft curls to her shoulder, side swept to the left with her bangs falling gracefully over her forehead. The white baby’s breath flowers tied her hair together and her light makeup smoothed out her skin perfectly. It was the type of makeover that Florence wasn’t a stranger to from her adolescent years, but the importance of that day had it meaning so much more.

She looked back down to the white envelope in her hand and smiled at the soft cursive of her name, ended with a small heart.

Florence opened the letter carefully, making sure to be cautious of her fresh manicure, and slid the small piece of cardstock out of the envelope. It was heavy in her hands and before she even read it, she felt tears prick at her eyes from the emotion of it all.

My Sweetheart,

We both know the story about how I was that love-sick teenager at the frat party, trying my best to hit on the most beautiful girl there and ultimately failing miserably after I accidentally spilled my entire drunken thoughts about how I was wanting to marry you one day. I bet you didn’t see that actually happening. I probably didn’t either to be honest. I still remember how you looked that night, almost like the image of you is ingrained in my memory forever. A shy young woman, clueless about where life was going to take her. I thank God every day that it took you to me. From the moment we first met, you have been the shining star guiding me wherever I go; saving me when I’m lost and being my biggest constellation when I succeed. Having you by my side through everything is the biggest reassurance and I truly don’t know where I would be without you. Thank you for not only blessing us with our two beautiful daughters, but also for being such a selfless and caring mother. Thank you for pushing me when I feel like giving up, and being able to let me come to you with anything, even if it’s as stupid as losing my keys over and over again. Thank you for saying yes, for promising to love me through all the hardships. Thank you for making me who I am. I’m honoured to soon be able to call you my wife.

It’s always been you.

All my love,

Daniel

~~

Daniel stood at the top of the stairs, biting anxiously at his bottom lip, watching all the guests below make their way into the conservatory for the ceremony.

“5 minutes.” Tyler said, coming up behind his youngest brother and set a hand on his shoulder, “How are we feeling?”

“Really freaking nervous for some reason.” Daniel mumbled, his voice shaking.

“You’re not facing your death, Dan.” Christian laughed, joining them by the stairs as well.

“I know, I know. What if I like…mess something up? Or like…cry in front of everyone.” Daniel sighed, looking back down the stairs at the hallway that now appeared empty, meaning all the guests were seated.

“That’s the whole point of a wedding. You’re doing it wrong if you don’t cry.” Christian scoffed, brushing his hands over his youngest brother’s shoulders, straightening out his suit.

“You look good, bro.” Tyler smiled.

“Boys, it’s time.” Keri called from the bottom of the stairs. “Tyler, Christian, get out there please.”

“Good luck.” Christian winked as the eldest brothers rushed down the stairs and into the conservatory.

“Ready, baby?” Keri asked, sensing Daniel’s hesitation from the flight of stairs that seperated them. Daniel nodded and walked down to her slowly. “You look so handsome.” She smiled at her youngest son, holding his face in her hands. “I’m so proud of you, you know?”

“Thanks, Mum.” Daniel whispered, smiling softly to the dark wood floors.

She linked her arm in his and they took a few steps towards the grand doorway into the white painted conservatory. The large domed skylight was built of stained glass and cast a soft glow around the room, the floor to ceiling windows framed with elaborate white paneling only adding to the sunlight seeping onto the cream checkered tile floor. Dark marble trim lined the conservatory, dotted with many foliage and led to the end of the aisle where the officiant stood in front of the fountain framed in white flowers.

Daniel and his mother took the two marble steps into the sun filled conservatory and all eyes turned to them. It wasn’t a large guest list. The young couple didn’t know many people, but the four steady rows were only filled with everyone in their lives. Daniel couldn’t bite back his wide grin, turning to look at his mother on his arm who smiled up at him proudly. When they reached the altar, he leaned down to kiss her cheek and she sat down in the front row with his father and two brothers. Christian and Tyler gave him two thumbs up, making him chuckle as he shuffled in place. His friends sat behind them, Jack throwing up a heart with his hands that made Jonah smack his arm and shake his head. Daniel stuck his tongue out at them teasingly regardless, his hands held together behind his back, tapping a finger against his palm restlessly. He kept his eyes focussed on the double doors a few metres away.

Barely a minute later – although it felt like an eternity – the band started to play and everyone in the room turned to look behind them.

Anna and Callum walked out first, arm in arm. Anna held a small white bouquet and had on a long light pink gown, matching to Callum’s bowtie over his black suit. When they reached the front, they seperated, Callum standing to the left and Anna finding her place beside Daniel, giving his arm a small squeeze on her way and they exchanged small smiles.

Clementine and Penelope were next, still dressed in their matching light pink dresses and white Mary Janes, sprinkling white rose petals from their wicker baskets as they walked down the aisle with wide grins. The room ‘awe’d at the little girls, Daniel smiling so proudly at his daughters. Penelope ran ahead to him and wrapped her arms around his legs shyly.

He brushed her dark curls from her face, whispering a gentle, “Go sit with Luke, Penny girl.” as he ushered her towards them. Clementine held out her hand and the sisters went to their seats with the Clifford’s.

The room shifted to their feet, everyone turning to the double doors as Florence and Michael stepped down the two small stairs into the conservatory. Daniel could have sworn his heart stopped beating at the sight of her in the long white ballgown, the lace accents sitting softly over her shoulders and the thin veil tucked securely into her blonde hair and falling effortlessly down her back. The moment she looked up at him, her light eyes finding his, Daniel couldn’t hold back his tears, pressing his hand to his mouth in awe by her. 

It was if nothing mattered anymore, not worrying about anything but the woman he loved dressed in white, walking towards their future. He couldn’t help but return her smile as he wiped the tears from his cheeks, her eyes already shimmering with tears herself as Michael pressed a kiss to her cheek and passed her over into Daniel’s outstretched hand.

“You look gorgeous.” Daniel whispered, his voice breaking a little as he tried to speak.

“So do you.” Florence chuckled lightly, taking a shaking breath as her other hand fell into his.

They stood together, hand in hand, in front of all their friends and family, as the officiant opened the wedding. Daniel couldn’t take his eyes off of her and Florence was just the same, giving his hands a soft squeeze.

After a quick prayer and introduction, the floor was passed to the bride first for her vows. She took a shaking breath, a small nervous whimper falling from her glossy lips and Daniel smiled at her reassuringly.

Florence met his strong gaze, running her thumbs over his as she spoke.

“Daniel James Seavey, five years ago to this day, I was nothing less than a confused 18-year-old, unsure of what my purpose in life was. I was really at my lowest point. But that goofy, slightly tipsy brunette boy sat himself down next to me and right away things started looking up. From that night onwards, you have taught me so many valuable lessons, from learning how to live joyously, trust honestly, and love passionately. It hasn’t been an easy five years, but I know that after all the tests we have been put through to get here, that our love can survive anything. Loving you is my greatest honour and I promise to love you more and more with each passing day as your wife,” Florence paused a moment, her bottom lip trembling as she held back her tears and her hands tightening on his, “and as your best friend. I promise to laugh with you and cry with you, and to never go to sleep angry. Even if you’re always waking me up in the middle of night when you get a burst of inspiration at 3am and you have to play a new song right then and there.”

The room laughed lightly.

Florence sniffled but continued, “It’s not going to be easy. At least that’s what everyone always told me. But for some reason, standing here with you right now, nothing but the strongest love in my heart, knowing that you’re by my side forever…nothing seems easier than that.”

Daniel cracked a small smile through his silent tears, mumbling a very quiet ‘I love you’ which she returned.

“I wrote mine down because you know I can’t keep my mind in one place.” Daniel said, reaching into his jacket pocket to pull out a small piece of paper. He unfolded it and took a shaking breath, taking a quick look at his bride and smiling, sliding one hand back into hers before turning back to his vows.

“Florence Margret DiCaprio. My sweetheart. My best friend. There seem to be so many words to describe what you mean to me but none that seem to be enough to truly encompass how I feel. I have been a boy in love since I first laid eyes on you and I knew, although quite naïve at the time, that life wouldn’t be quite worth living if you weren’t by my side. I made many stupid mistakes in my life, especially the first two years of knowing you, but you never gave up on me and you never held that against me. We make each other better people, better parents, and better life partners. I thank God every single day for bringing you into my life, for bringing our daughters into our lives, and for allowing me the chance to live the life that I only could ever dream about. I promise to work through life with you, to be there for you at your lowest at and to celebrate with you at your highest, to cherish you and our children through everything, and to write you so many songs that we could make our own record library.”

Daniel glanced up at her to meet her soft chuckle through her forming tears, her hand gently squeezing his.

He looked back down to his paper, gently rubbing his thumb over hers, he took a small breath, looking back at her as he spoke, “Most importantly, I promise to you love you honestly and truly, with all my heart, until my last breath.”

Florence let a few tears fall down her cheeks, her heart felling like it might beat right out of her chest. How she absolutely adored the man in front of her.

Clementine was ushered over with the little satchel with the rings and Daniel bent down to take them from her.

“Thank you, angel.” he smiled softly, pressing a kiss to her cheek before standing up again. She rushed back over to her seat with a grin on her little face.

Daniel stood back up, following the instructions of the minister. He took Florence’s left hand in his, carefully sliding the ring on her finger, saying “Take this ring as a sign of my everlasting love.”

The minister directed Florence to do the same. She smiled softly at Daniel before taking his left hand and slid on his own ring, “Take this ring as a sign of my everlasting love.”

Their hands fell into each other’s sharing excited smiles, hand in hand, as the minister said his closing remarks and blessings.

“I now pronounce you man and wife; you may kiss the bride.”

Daniel let out a quiet, “Oh my gosh” as he leaned in to kiss her. Florence’s hands went to the side of his neck to keep him close, smiling widely into it, as their friends and family applauded.

They whispered quick “I love yous” heard only to them before they were walking back down the aisle hand in hand.

Photographs were taken on the castle grounds under the trees that were changing colour into a frenzy of oranges and reds. Daniel felt like his smile would never leave his face, staying tucked up nice a close to Florence as if he never wanted to be more then two inches away from her for the rest of time. It was all a bit messy and a tad chaotic, the two young girls getting a bit restless and wanting to jump in the fallen leaves rather than pose for picture and Penelope fell over which got them a few good shots of her bawling her eyes out in Daniel’s arms, her tears staining his suit jacket. But even still, Daniel and Florence wouldn’t have had it any other way.

They still had their moment to walk into the library where their reception was, hand in hand, their small group of family and friends standing and cheering and Florence felt happier than she ever thought was possible in life. Daniel led her to the middle of the dancefloor as the lights dimmed to a soft glow and he pulled her close for their first dance. The music played through the speakers, filling the dark wood library with an indescribable warmth, their eyes on each other’s with Daniel’s hands tucked around her waist and Florence’s hands draped over his shoulders.

It was a love song that Daniel heard on the radio one day and it brought him to tears alone in his car on the way home from class, the words speaking volumes about the deep and unbreakable love he had for this girl, who had overcome so much with him, to find them in that exact moment.

He couldn’t help but lean in to kiss her softly, running his thumb softly over the lace of her dress, smiling as she curled into him, leaning her head on his shoulder as they swayed slowly to their favourite song. Daniel let his eyes close, trying to savour the feeling of that very moment, letting the lyrics fall quietly from his lips as he sang to her as if it was just the two of them. Florence moved back a little to look at him, their noses brushing a little, keeping her arms tucked around his shoulders, pressed up close as if they were one.

Of course, nothing was ever perfect, and Clementine managed to slink out of Christian’s lap and made a beeline for the dance floor, dodging his desperate lunge for her. Daniel reached out to grab her as she ran right for them, keeping one hand on Florence’s waist as he took her small hand in his own and she swayed dramatically to the music the best she could. Florence waved over Penelope who rushed over to them as well and joined into their little circle, spending more time with her arms held up to Daniel to get him to pick her up than anything. Daniel and Florence finished their first dance with their two daughters, Clementine twirling around her mother’s white ballgown and Penelope curled shyly into her father’s neck. They wouldn’t have had it any other way.

The rest of the evening was spent amongst their family and friends, eating their expensive dinner and thanking everyone for coming. Dancing occurred by evening and despite the loud music and lights, both Penelope and Clementine were fast asleep, the youngest tucked up on Christian’s lap with her head on his chest and the oldest sleeping against Callum’s shoulder. The brothers, Callum especially, was set on giving Florence and Daniel all the time together on their special day, meaning he was on toddler-duty all night. Christian didn’t complain in helping out either.

The newly married couple didn’t really get their one-on-one time until the reception came to an end and they were off for their honeymoon. Newly graduated from university and parents of two, all they could afford was a week at a ritzy hotel downtown which is where they found themselves that night. Not wanting to be apart for a moment longer; a bit tipsy from champagne from the wedding and a bit love-drunk, they made the impromptu decision to have a third baby, consummating their marriage in the soft white sheets of the hotel king size bed.

And for the rest of the week.

It was no surprise when they were met with two positive pregnancy tests come the end of November...

[casshasfangs]

midnight

Cass rested his chin in his palm and put his elbow on his knee, which was bouncing anxiously. He sat like that for a second and then stood, starting to pace. He could hear everyone out in the pub- but not many people. Not many heartbeats. Cass frowned, glancing back at Piper, “Did we get the time right? There’s not many people out there.” He muttered, then went back to pacing, looking at the time on the wall.

As the time edged closer and closer to their start, and he heard no further voices, Cass folded his arms around his chest anxiously, then looked back to the three girls. Rhett would hear how few people were out there, but Shosh and Piper wouldn’t. He worried his lower lip and swallowed. “Okay. So. Smaller than we thought. It’s okay- still okay,” Cass tried to reassure himself, nodding. “Means we’ve got, uh, more to build up to.” He nodded, looking to Piper for reassurance, who gave him a very encouraging thumbs up.

Piper did a final check on their back-up batteries and generator and then ushered them towards the makeshift stage, before heading into the pub herself.

Rhett was first out. She looked badass in her get up, her look finished with a crude muzzle slapped around her mouth. When she sat behind her drumkit, there were a few stray cheers from the small gathering of people who attended. It made Cass feel a tad more hopeful.

Shosh was next, looking a vision as always. Her signature piece were the long, thigh-high heeled boots that she strutted forward towards her elaborate synth set up, running a hand through her long, dark mane that fell in tangles down her back.

He was on his own backstage. Cass hopped from foot to foot, nervous, and then leapt up the stairs and onto the tiny stage, side-stepping one of Shosh’s keyboards to get to his spot at the front. “How are you all tonight?” He asked, like they’d practiced. Even though there was no one there, even though he didn’t hear the loud cheers they were anticipating, Cass was a good actor. His eyes sparkled as he smiled, picking up his guitar and slinging it over his shoulder. “It’s our first gig tonight, so we should probably introduce ourselves, huh?” He spotted Sonder in the crowd, and gripped the mic with a smile, “That’s Rhett on the drums, Shosh on keys, I’m Cass. We are The Band Cthulu.”

Rhett burst into an elaborate introduction which settled into a good beat, which Shosh added to immediately. He turned as he usually did, watching both of them for his cue, before he started playing again. They played the songs on their EP- Register This, Uprising, Fuck Mrs Robinson, Mutt, Pulse, Werewolves of London. The second last song was an acoustic moment that they hadn’t recorded, the song Rhett had written (with Cass’s help) for Sol. Their final song was Fuck Mrs Robinson and as expected, everyone seemed to enjoy it, as empty and dark as the room was.

Cass thanked the tiny gathering of people, gave a big bow, then headed backstage again. He flopped back on the amp he’d been sitting on, immediately going for a bottle of water. By the time he opened it, Piper was somehow backstage.

“You guys did awesome!” Piper said, her smile wide, her eyes shiny with tears. She clutched her hands in front of her heart and Cass turned to look up at her, raising how brows. She seemed to sense his hesitation and shook her head, “Like you said- a small crowd means there’s more room to grow! There’s no way none of them will leave without a copy after how you guys played, then their friends will hear… This is a good thing!”

Cass wiped the sweat off his brow, tipping back his water and giving a heavy sigh. He looked back at Shosh and Rhett, pursing his lips and giving the best, most hopeful smile he could manage. They talked about it- and all three of them agreed they’d played great and the people who’d showed seemed to like it, but maybe they just needed more time and a better location next time. Disappointing, but they’d be ok. The music was still good. 

They went back into the pub to say hi to everyone. Cass, who was filled with adrenaline, gave Sonder a deep, sweaty kiss to say thanks for coming. He met Piper’s weird roommates again, Oz gave him that same weird look that set him on edge and made him want to have a long bath. Cass collected up the signatures from their petition and tucked the parchment in his back pocket, content to mail it off to his Dad later.

The pub cleared out until just the three of them were left. After packing up all of their stuff and shrinking it into their backpacks, Cass, Shosh and Rhett strolled out the side door of the Hog’s Head Pub. Shosh stood between Cass and Rhett, her arms resting over her friends’ shoulders as they strolled down the cobblestone street, moonlight illuminating them. 

[mayhem24-7forever]

The Littlest Cowgirl and the Mean Old Bull (Whumptober 2022)

Whumptober Prompts (from this list): Lies - New Scars - Breathing Through The Pain

Character: Rhett Abbott (Outer Range)

Author’s Notes: If you are not over eighteen, this is not for you! I deserve a safe place to express myself and that includes not wanting minors to read my content, even when it is not sexual in nature. Thank you. I am REALLY sorry that this is late but I really am trying my best okay! I actually switched this with day 15 bc I had no inspiration for that day and I wanted to write this one lmao. HUGE thank you to @jostystyles for looking over this for me, this is for you baby. fic dividers by my darling @a-reader-and-a-writer, thank you so so much

Warnings: ANGST, bull riding, graphic descriptions of violence and injuries, blood and gore, low key religious trauma, hospitals, misplaced guilt, (AKA Jo traumatizes Rhett’s five year old daughter for 4.5k words)

“Momma hurry up! We’re gonna miss daddy’s ride!” the little girl called, dragging her mother towards the stands and through the crowd by the hand.

“Slow down Annie!” Y/N laughed, shaking her head as her five year old daughter plowed through the crowd of adults without hesitation. “We have time!”

Angelica Abbott was definitely her father’s daughter, all attitude and sass, just like Rhett. She stomped through, weaving through the legs of the crowd, her tiny pink cowgirl boots kicking up tiny clouds of dust as she went. For her outfit that evening (she always dressed up for daddy’s rodeos), she had chosen to dress in a miniature matching version of what her father was wearing, a dark blue flannel and jeans, her hair braided into two tails under her pink cowgirl hat.

She didn’t slow down, not satisfied until her and her mother had taken their seats in the stands with grandpa Royal. The rodeo was on the other side of the state from Wabang as it was a big competition and so Rhett and his wife had decided to make it into a little vacation for Annie. Royal had come to see his son compete in the biggest competition of his career, Cecelia staying home to watch Amy as Perry had gone on another bender and as such was unfit. Annie climbed up the stands and hopped into her grandfather’s lap as her mother trailed behind her, out of breath from chasing and calling after the rambunctious child.

“Angelica, what have I told you about runnin’ away from your mama?” Royal asked as sternly as he could, struggling to stop himself from smiling at her adorably grumpy face.

Royal’s grandchildren were his weakness and one look from Amy or Annie would have him giving in to give them whatever they wanted, a fact they both took advantage of. Y/N huffed out a final breath as she sat down next to her father-in-law.

“Mama’s too slow!” Annie whined and Royal chuckled. “Daddy’s about to ride and we were gonna miss it!”

“Your father doesn’t ride for another ten minutes, little one.” Royal supplied and Annie giggled as she shrugged.

Annie settled back in her grandfather’s lap, leaning back against his chest and peering down at the ring and the bull pens behind it. The three of them played I Spy for a while to kill the time, Annie giggling when she chose to describe the same trailer for the third turn in a row.

“Oh look! It’s daddy!” Y/N said and Annie sat up, looking to where her mom was pointing at the back of the ring to find her father getting ready to mount the bull in it’s tiny pen.

“Daddy!” she squealed and Rhett turned to wave at her with a big smile, Annie waving back frantically.

“I love you, Angel!” he called back, his nickname for her barely audible from so far with so much noise around them.

Rhett turned to focus on mounting the bull when Annie’s face suddenly dropped.

“Oh no!” she cried out and her mother and grandfather looked to her in concern. “I didn’t give daddy his good luck kiss! I always give him his good luck kiss before he rides!”

“It’s alright sweetheart, just you being here to watch him is all the luck he’ll ever need.” Royal assured her.

She watched nervously as Rhett struggled to mount the bull, the handlers barely able to get him on it. Annie had never seen that happen and it made her stomach twist into knots. She turned to her mother, leaning practically onto her lap and got her attention as the man on the speakers started talking.

“Mama?” she said quietly and her mother leaned in to hear her daughter over the announcer. “My tummy hurts.”

“Oh, I’m sorry baby, we can go back to the hotel right after daddy finishes his ride.” Y/N assured her and Annie frowned.

“Need to go now!” she insisted, pouting.

“Sweetheart, daddy is about to ride. Eight seconds and he’s off and we can go, okay?” her mother asked and Annie reluctantly nodded, settling back into her grandfather’s lap uneasily.

Annie had seen a lot of her father’s rides over her very short life, whether it was in a sling wrapping her against her mother’s body, nestled on her grandmother’s lap, or perched high up on her grandfather’s shoulders. A few times, her father had fallen off or had a rough landing but he always got back up with minimal injuries, usually just some cuts and bruises, a sprain or two at the worst.

Whenever that happened, Rhett would sit on a chair in the kitchen as Y/N cleaned and bandaged his cuts and put ice on his bruises. Annie would be perched on the kitchen table or on his lap, using her little toy first aid kit to help her momma. She liked playing nurse to help her daddy feel better when he was hurt. Rhett would always end up covered in dozens of flowery and sparkly little bandaids, whether he needed them or not (and usually he didn’t).

“Daddy just got a little banged up by the mean old bull, baby.” he would assure her, her little fingers tracing over the scars, both new and old on his chest. “I’m just lucky I have you and your mama–best nurses in Amelia county–to always take care of me.”

Annie usually loved to watch her father ride bulls but as she waited for the ride to start, that bad feeling in her stomach got worse and worse. The bullhorn sounded and the gates were thrown open, the bull launching out of the shoot, Rhett hanging onto its back for dear life. She tried to count the seconds like her grandmother had taught her to do between lightning and thunder to know how far away a storm was.

One-one thousand. The crowd including her grandfather shot to their feet, hooting and hollering.

Two-one thousand. The bull bucked over and over again, bellowing in anger at the man on his back.

Three-one thousand. Rhett’s hat flew off his head, landing in the dirt below the angry bull’s stomping hooves and quickly being trampled.

Four-one thousand. The halfway point, Rhett still holding on tightly to the reins even as the bull got angrier and angrier, trying harder and harder to throw him off.

Five-one thousand. The dust cloud kicked up by the bull got bigger and bigger, almost hiding the image of Rhett perched on it’s back, his hand up in the air just like in the tattoo on his chest.

Six-one thousand. One of the ropes on the bull snapped, Rhett’s grip slipping as the entire saddle was knocked loose.

Seven-one thousand. Rhett’s body was flung off of the bucking bull, hitting the ground with a sickening smacking noise inaudible over the loud collective gasp of the crowd as the angry bull charged in to attack with swinging horns and stomping hooves.

The handlers were good at their jobs, getting the bull roped and pulled away from him in mere moments. Within seconds, Rhett’s unmoving body was swarmed by about a dozen handlers and blocking the crowd’s view of him. The crowd had gone deathly silent but as the bull was pulled back into its pen, they began to murmur in hushed whispers. Royal and Y/N were frozen in shock, unable to stop Annie when she wriggled out of her grandfather’s arms and took off down the stairs and towards the pen.

“Angelica, no!” Y/N screamed, racing after her but Annie didn’t listen.

“DADDY!” Annie screamed, sliding between the legs of some officials and into the ring before anyone could stop her, tears streaming down her cheeks as she ran towards the circle of bodies surrounding her father.

Rhett’s brain was pounding in his skull, his eyes struggling to focus on anything but the bright lights of the arena as half a dozen dark figures hovered above him, their panicked voices overlapping.

“Don’t move Rhett! Just don’t move!”

“Jesus fucking Christ-”

“The paramedics are coming, alright?”

“Abbott, blink twice if you can hear me!”

“Oh my God…”

“Do not move!”

“Fuck, fuck, fuck-”

He tuned them out, lying there in the dirt as he attempted to breathe through the agonizing pain on every inch of his body. Something warm and wet was pooling below his left leg and he couldn’t move his left arm at all. He blinked hard as the figures above him came in and out of focus, the same horrified look on every one of their faces. His whole body ached and he groaned in pain when someone tried to touch him. But he didn’t care. All that mattered was making sure his baby girl didn’t see him like that, especially as he heard a small but loud voice shrieking “Daddy!” and wailing in distress. He turned his head as much as he could to look between the legs of the others to see a tiny figure sprinting towards him from across the ring.

“Stop her… can’t… see me… like this.” Rhett rasped, a bit of blood coming out of his mouth as he wheezed in pain.

Luckily, one of the handlers was able to grab her before she got close enough to see him and Rhett could hear her screaming as she was handed off to Royal, who had been hot on her heels. Her voice got further and further away, her grandfather evidently carrying her away despite her loud protests. The men around Rhett parted enough to let Y/N through and she collapsed onto her knees at his side, her terrified eyes raking over his body and taking stock of his injuries. The protective vest seemed to have shielded his chest from the bull’s horns but his legs were not as lucky. He had a huge gash on his left leg, blood pouring forth through a tear in both chaps and jeans. His left arm was smashed, bones jutting out at impossible angles and he was having great difficulty breathing, his chest rising and falling unsteadily at uneven intervals with a rattling wheeze accompanying each breath.

“Oh my God, baby…” she gasped, shaky hands covering her mouth in shock, tears beginning to pour out of the corner of her eyes as she turned to scream at the men standing around. “Where the fuck are the medics! We need a fucking ambulance! Don’t just fucking stand there!”

Rhett chuckled a little at his wife’s fiery rage before the laugh turned to a cough, more blood spraying from his mouth which pulled her attention back to him. Her hands flew to his face, cradling him as she moved strands of his long hair off of his sweaty forehead. Grunting with effort, he moved to place his right hand on hers and she eagerly took it, trying to keep him from moving too much.

“It’s okay baby, don’t move. The medics are coming through the gate right now, okay?” she assured him and he nodded slightly, gazing up into his beautiful wife’s sad eyes. “Just hold on, baby. You’re gonna be just fine, Rhett.”

He squeezed her hand and gave her a small smile.

“I love you, baby. If I don’t get to tell you again, I love you so damn much.” Rhett said and she shook her head, shushing him.

“No, don’t think like that, okay? You’re gonna be alright and you can tell me again later.” she replied, crying as she looked down at her husband. “I love you and Annie loves you and you’re not going anywhere.”

“Our little angel didn’t see me like this, right?” he asked and she shook her head.

“No, your father took her outside the ring.” she assured him and he breathed out in relief.

“Tell her I’m okay.” he said weakly and they both knew it was a lie. “Tell her daddy is just a little more bruised up than usual from the mean old bull.”

Y/N nodded, unable to speak through her tears as the paramedics kneeled beside them, dropping his hand reluctantly when a rodeo official gently eased her up and away from him so they had room to work. She felt like she was in a nightmare as she was led out of the ring, glancing backwards every few seconds to watch them strap him onto a board and carry him into an ambulance.

Everything had been a blur of tears to Annie ever since her grandfather had carried her out of the ring, ignoring her angry fists pounding on his chest and her screamed demands to be taken back. An ambulance with flashing lights and sirens pulled up to the gate of the ring and drove inside as some rodeo officials ushered Royal and Annie into an office in the back of the arena. When another official brought Y/N in a few minutes later, Annie was still blubbering into her grandfather’s neck as he shushed her and stroked her back. The second she saw her mother Annie reached for her and was pulled into her mother’s arms, Royal holding the pair comfortingly.

The officials talked with Royal and Y/N for a while but Annie wasn’t paying attention, instead continuing to cry as she clung to her mother. They were brought out to a car and driven back to their hotel, her mother telling her that daddy was going to the hospital but that they couldn’t see him until he felt a little better. Royal thanked the man who drove them, his comforting arm around his daughter-in-law’s shoulder as they headed for their rooms, Royal deciding to stay in their room for the night.

When they had made the reservations, Royal had his own room while Rhett’s family took a room with two beds, one for Rhett and Y/N and the other for Annie. Annie had been very excited to have her own big big-girl bed as a vacation treat, although most nights she ended up sleeping in her parents’ bed anyways as she found out she didn’t like sleeping in such a big bed all alone. Royal excused himself to go out onto the balcony to call Cecelia and let her know what had happened while Y/N struggled to get Annie through her nighttime routine.

Annie refused to take a bath and even threw her favorite bath toy (a rubber duck with a cowboy hat) at her mother, yelling that she wanted her daddy. Y/N tried to stay calm and keep it together, feeling just as upset as her daughter but unlike the little girl, she had responsibilities, trying to remember that Annie was only acting out because she was scared and she didn’t fully comprehend what was happening. Y/N was able to get her into her pajamas and coax her to lay down on her bed, falling into a restless sleep, crying in her mother’s arms, squeezing her favorite stuffed animal, Bessie the pink cow, tightly.

Rhett had been showing Annie all the animals on the ranch one day when she asked why some of the cows were black and white, but others were brown. He told her that the color of the cow showed what kind of milk they made: the black and white cows making regular milk, the brown ones making chocolate milk, and pink cows making strawberry milk. Annie had asked why they didn’t have any pink cows on the ranch and Rhett told her it was because they were “so super rare” only special pink cow farms could have them, which disappointed her. A few days later, she found a little stuffed pink cow sitting on her bed, her mother shaking her head and smiling at how much Rhett spoiled her.

Annie woke up a little bit later, the lights all off and she couldn’t stop thinking about her daddy’s accident, convinced it was her fault because she forgot to give him his good luck kiss beforehand. She crawled out of Y/N’s arms, careful not to wake her and hopped of the bed, kneeling next to it with her hands together in front of her like grandma had taught her.

"Dear Mr. Jesus, I know I don't pray to you as much as gramma wants me to but please save my daddy.” Annie begged, choking on her whispered pleas as tears began to stream down her face again. “I'm really sorry I didn't give him his good luck kiss before his ride but please make him get better. I swear i'll never forget to give him his good luck kiss again, I'm sorry. I’ll eat all my veggies without complaining and I’ll do my letter books for school and listen to mama when she tells me to clean my room. I swear I’ll be good, I swear I’ll be a good girl, Mr. Jesus sir, please save my daddy."

Satisfied with her prayer, she she padded across the carpeted room to the bathroom, dragging Bessie on the ground behind her. Once she had finished her business, she noticed that her grandfather was still out on the balcony with his head in his hands. She walked over and tried to open the heavy glass sliding door but couldn’t reach the handle. Gently, she tapped on the glass and Royal turned to reveal a tear-stained face. Wiping his eyes quickly, he leaned over and opened the door, giving his granddaughter the best smile he could muster as she stepped outside into the cool night air, her tiny feet quick to cross the cold cement.

“What are you doing up, little one?” he asked, voice hoarse and raw from crying as he lifted her up into his lap.

“Had to go potty.” she answered, reaching up to place her little hand on his cheek, still wet with tears. “Were you crying grampa?”

Royal nodded, eyes overflowing with tears again, and Annie gave him a big hug. She had never seen her grandfather cry before but she wanted to make him feel better so she did what he did every time she cried and hugged him tightly.

“Grampa?” Annie asked quietly after a minute and he pulled back to look at her.

“Yes, darlin’?” he asked and she looked up at him nervously.

“Is daddy gonna be okay?” she asked with wide eyes, the same blue eyes as her father and suddenly Royal felt as if he had been thrown back in time to when he had first held Rhett in his arms. “Are the doctors gonna make him all better?”

“I don’t know, darlin’...” he answered honestly, stroking her hair as she picked at Bessie’s fabric, avoiding his eyes. “The doctors are gonna do everything they can but ultimately we don’t know what’s gonna happen. But I’ll tell you what I do know…”

“What, grampa?” she asked, head snapping up to look at him as she listened intently.

“Your daddy is a fighter, he always has been, ever since he was as little as you.” he told her, trying to keep himself from crying again as he looked down at her, so full of fear and hope. “He’s one tough son of a bitch like me and he’s gonna fight as hard as he can to make it back to you and your mama.”

“You said a no no word, grampa.” she said with a little giggle that made him smile despite everything.

“I suppose I did.” he chuckled. “Don’t tell your grandmama I said that and I won’t tell your mama that you’re up this late. It can be our little secret, deal?”

“Deal!” she replied, curling up in his arms again with her head on his chest, holding Bessie tightly as she drifted to sleep listening to his steady heartbeat.

He waited until he was sure that she was asleep before he got up and carried her back inside, putting her back down next to her mother. He tucked them in, Annie instinctively curling up against Y/N in her sleep, and gave them both a kiss on the forehead before heading over to the other bed to try and sleep.

“Annie, baby, wake up.” Her mother’s voice said, gently coaxing her awake and she opened her eyes to find herself looking up at her mother’s smiling face. “The hospital called. Daddy is okay and we can visit him now!”

Annie sat up quickly, eyes wide with surprise.

“Really?” she asked and Y/N nodded.

“We’re gonna go get some breakfast while we wait for visiting hours to begin and then we’re gonna go see him.” she told her daughter with a smile, stroking her hair comfortingly.

“The doctors made him all better?” Annie asked.

“Well, he’s still not feeling all better yet, he’s still hurt but the doctors said that he’s gonna be okay now.” Y/N assured her. “And in a few days, they’re gonna let him out of the hospital and we’ll all get to go home, alright baby?”

Annie nodded and gave her mom a hug before they got ready to go, Annie deciding she wanted to wear her pretty yellow sunday dress to go see him, Y/N grateful she had the forethought to pack it even though they hadn’t planned on going to church. After all three were ready, they walked across the street to a restaurant, Royal carrying his grand daughter as she rambled on about what kind of pancakes she wanted and how they had to bring some to Rhett. Royal and Y/N talked about adult stuff Annie didn’t understand while they ate breakfast, Annie tearing into her chocolate chip pancakes and drowning them in syrup. She was very excited when her mama let her order hot chocolate and she sipped away at it while her grandfather talked about medical and financial stuff with her mother.

Annie made sure they ordered a plate of food for Rhett, telling the waitress that she needed to please make sure the box was closed tight because they had to take it to the hospital for her daddy and she didn’t want to spill anything. When Royal was paying the check at the cash register up front, the waitress gave Annie a cookie and handed over the box for Rhett, which she said was ‘on the house’, although Annie didn’t understand how it could be on the house if they were in it. Either way, Y/N thanked her and the trio headed outside and across the street again.

The car from the previous night came to pick them up again and drive them to the hospital, dropping them off right at the front doors. They stopped in the gift shop so Annie could pick out some flowers for her father while Royal asked the staff for Rhett’s room number. Annie held her mother’s hand tightly as they took the elevator up a couple floors and a nurse led them down the bright hallways that seemed so endlessly long before they finally stopped in front of a door. The nurse knocked and opened the door.

“Mr. Abbott, you have some visitors here to see you.” she said with a smile and Annie was ushered into the room, the nurse shutting the door behind her when she left.

The first thing Annie noticed was how bright and clean everything was, a big window with the curtains thrown open taking up almost a whole wall. Then she saw the very high bed, big machines beeping beside it. There were so many tubes, cords, and wires everywhere that it took her a minute to realize that her father was lying in the bed with his head propped up on some pillows. His left side was way more bandaged than his right side and his left arm was in a cast but he smiled at her anyways.

“Hey Angel!” Rhett exclaimed. “Did you get all dressed up in your pretty dress just to come see me?”

Annie noticed the big bandages on his head and looked down at the floor, clinging to her mother’s leg shyly.

“Annie, go on baby, it’s okay.” Y/N prodded her gently trying to usher her towards her father but she just held on to her leg tighter with her eyes squeezed shut, little tears slipping out as she began to cry into her mother’s side.

Startled, Y/N looked to Rhett and Royal in confusion before kneeling down at her daughter’s level, pulling her into her arms.

“It’s okay, baby. Look, daddy’s alright!” she assured her, picking her up and carrying her towards Rhett’s bed, stroking her hair comfortingly. “I know it looks scary but he’s okay, sweetheart!”

Annie looked at her father again before bursting into tears and burying her head in her mother’s neck.

“I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I’m sorry!” she cried out and the adults looked to one another in concern as she blubbered on. “I’m sorry I got you hurt daddy, I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to!”

“Angel, what do you mean? You didn’t hurt daddy.” Rhett assured her as Y/N sat in the chair by his bed so he could reach out to comfort his baby girl, Annie turning her head to look at him.

“It’s my fault! I didn’t give you your good luck kiss!” she sobbed and her parents sighed in realization. “I always give you your good luck kiss so you don’t get hurt but I forgot this time and you did get hurt!”

“Angelica, look at me.” Rhett told her, holding her hands as she turned in Y/N’s lap to face him directly, blue eyes staring into blue eyes. “This is not your fault. This didn’t happen because I didn’t get a good luck kiss, okay? So don’t think for one second that you caused this because you didn’t.”

“R- really?” she asked, voice catching on her tears and Rhett wiped them off of her cheeks, her mother rubbing her back comfortingly.

“Yes, Angel. I’m sure.” he told her with a smile. “Now, come give me a hug, I missed my baby girl so much.”

“I don’t want to hurt you, daddy.” she said quietly, looking at his bandages worriedly.

“You won’t baby. Just be gentle and stay on this side and I’ll be okay.” Rhett assured her, referring to his right side and she nodded.

Y/N helped her climb up onto the bed and gently lay down beside him, tucked into his side under his arm as he held his wife’s hand.

“See? I’m alright, Angel. I just got a little more banged up than usual by the mean old bull and I’ll have some new scars but I’m okay.” he told her. “And I’m never gonna ride another bull again, okay?”

“Really?” she asked, half in surprise and half in happiness.

“I pinky promise.” he said, letting go of his wife’s hand to link pinkies with his daughter as she smiled.

“Oh!” she said suddenly, dropping his pinky and digging in her pocket as her parents looked at her in confusion. “I got it!” she exclaimed as she fished out one of her flowery bandaids. She carefully peeled off the wrapper and stuck it on his hand, looking up at him proudly. “All better!”

“Yes, Angel, thank you.” Rhett said, pressing a kiss to her forehead and grabbing his wife’s hand, smiling at Royal as he nodded affectionately from his spot in the doorway. “I’m all better now.”

[loulougoingsolo]

Confirmation

Another little Rhink fic from a hopeless romantic, inspired by and based on the Exploding soda challenge episode, GMM #1066. Some inpiration came also from the very fascinating gifs made by @jacularmetteld and other tumblrs.

The story is fictional, obviously, and written just for fun, so don’t take it too seriously. Not explicit in any way, but kind of adult rhink content I guess…Anyways, enjoy reading!-

Rhett heard the familiar sound of a car honking outside his house. Before he had time to move, he heard Jessie’s voice from the kitchen. -‘Link’s here! It’s time for you to get out of your head and go to work.’

Jessie walked behind him, gave a sweet kiss on his neck, and handed him a paper bag. -‘Here’s something for you to eat, in case you miss lunch. There’s an apple for Link, too, if he wants one. And, honey, things will work out.’ Another smooch, this time on the cheek, then a gentle little pat on his butt, and he was basically kicked out of the house.

Link was waiting in the blue minivan for him to step in, looking a bit restless. He hated waiting, especially in the morning, and since this was a filming day, he wanted to get to the office on time. In his mind, Rhett made a little sigh, preparing to face his friend, and opened the car door. -‘Sorry, buddy, I know I’m late. Jessie sent you an apple.’

Link turned his head towards Rhett to say something snarky about Jessie sending gifts to her husband’s best friend, but as he looked in to Rhett’s eyes, he changed his mind. Rhett looked worried about something, he clearly wasn’t in the mood for bad jokes. -‘Is something wrong, Rhett? Something I should know about?’  Rhett raised his eyebrow, gave Link a little smile and responded with -‘It’s nothing, it’s just been a busy few days. I’m just glad it’s the end of the week.’

Despite the smile on Rhett’s face, Link wasn’t convinced. His friend's eyes were usually so open, but this time it seemed as if Rhett was doing his best to hide his feelings from his friend. Since there was nothing Link could do about it at that time, he put the car in reverse and drove off the drive way.

When they finally entered the Mythical entertainment headquarters, Rhett and Link were faced with an annoyed and busy Stevie. -‘Gosh guys, you just had to be late, today of all days, did you? We’re ready to start shooting, I need to be out of the office by noon, we really don’t have all day!’

Stevie stormed out of the hall way shouting commands to different crew members. Rhett and Link looked at each other and flashed a simultanious grin on their faces. Stevie sure knew how to be bossy sometimes!

At the set things were looking a bit different from usual. The weird head rests for their soda quiz episode had been placed on their desk, and the whole set was covered with plastic. Rhett felt restless as he inspected the setting. He had a bad feeling about this, but he didn’t quite know why. Everything seemed to be going according to plans, but he still couldn’t shake off the feeling of discomfort.

Link was reading the labels of the soda cans by their desk when Stevie walked in holding a pile of white fabric. She handed them over to Link. -‘Ok, let’s get started! Guys, go change these on, we need you to wear white for this one.’

-‘Are you sure these shorts aren’t just a little too short? Why can’t we wear the jeans from the Never-wet episode?’ Rhett was looking down on his lap, feeling just a little too exposed for comfort. Thank god for the desk between them and the camera! Link, on the other hand, was as relaxed as ever. He was never shy about showing his body - and why should have he been? Rhett knew far too well his friend’s body was perfect after all the physical activities he was so into. Not to mention his obvious sex-appeal enjoyed by so many Mythical Beasts. Rhett himself didn’t quite share Link’s ability to put himself on display. He was a little sensitive because of his psoriasis, his skinny legs and height. The fans seemed to like his appearance, but the truth was, he was only comfortable exposing his body when he was by himself or in the dark.

Link felt slightly exhilarated about the episode. He had some great questions to ask from Rhett, he loved having a reason to drink soda without feeling guilty (Christy kept telling him to avoid sugar). The crew had done a really good job with the labels - “Big hill residue” was just a perfect little detail among many. Did Rhett come up with that? Link couldn’t recall. He was still worried about his friend, who was looking as miserable as a lost puppy in his skimpy outfit. He was changing his weight from one foot to another, as if he was ready to run away as soon as he could. Link knew about how insecure Rhett could feel sometimes, but there was clearly something else causing him trouble today. He was acting almost normally, but sudden changes in his expressions could tell he was hating every minute. -‘I’ll need to ask him about it after the shoot.’

-'How the hell did we get to this?’, Rhett wondered, standing in the middle of the set, covered in sugary orange soda, wet and exposed. He wanted to cover himself so bad, to get somewhere private, to clear his head. He did everything in his power to avoid looking at his friend, who was screaming and laughing at his side as the crew kept spraying them with the freezing cold soda.

He tried to ignore Link’s presence, but the darkhaired man was looking as glorious as ever, standing there, dripping with cola. Or was it grape soda? In the corner of his eye, Rhett could see Link was getting a little too wet, he could clearly see the man’s nipples through the white t-shirt. Link was breathing heavily after being shocked by the cold spray, but, unlike Rhett, he seemed to be enjoying the situation. For a brief moment, Rhett gave himself a permission to look. The second he turned his eyes towards his friend he knew it was a mistake.

There he was, his buddy, his brother from another mother, in all his glory, smiling wickedly at the camera, almost as if he was trying to challenge his audience…to do what? To look at him? To enjoy watching him? There was very little to leave to the imagination, his entire presence was almost too much to bear. Rhett felt a flush of desire run through his body, sending unbearable shivers down his spine. There was nothing brotherly about his feelings towards that man, he realized, as he looked away trying to keep himself together, failing miserably at it.

They were almost finished filming GMMore. Link was pretending to be infatuated by the new flavour combinations, trying simultaniously to keep up the casual conversation between them. Something was off with Rhett, and he didn’t exactly feel at ease himself, either. All week, enticed by all the weird episodes they had filmed, he had noticed, that somewhere along the way, his feelings for Rhett had shifted from platonic friendship to something else. Every day he had been dropping tiny hints and suggestions towards Rhett, just to see if his tall friend was feeling something, too. He could have sworn there had been moments, when there was something in Rhett’s eyes, but he just didn’t know for sure. And as long as he wasn’t completely sure, he would never do anything too direct.

There were moments, when he wanted to touch that man so bad, his muscles were aching. But there were also those moments when he could see the sadness in his best friend's eyes, sadness that just made him want to hold him and comfort him, and whisper sweet words in to his ear. Link was too deeply in love to ever attempt to break the delicate balance between them. If only there was a sign from Rhett, so he could know for sure!

-'Ok guys, it’s a wrap!’ said Stevie, ending the episode officially. She couldn’t help but feel relieved that the exhausting week was over. She was worried she’d gone overboard with her not-so-subtle attempts to force her bosses to admit their true feelings. At times, she just felt frustrated, watching these two men deny their obvious love for each other day after day. She had been hoping this week’s themes would have helped them in taking the next step, but now she could see Rhett being more miserable than ever, and Link wound up just waiting to burst. Today had been way too tough for all of them, there had been moments when she had worried if they could even use the footage. Even the crew seemed to sense the tension between their stars. But there wasn’t much else she could do.

-'I’m gonna leave now, boys! Can you view the footage before you leave, to see if there’s anything you want to change? Have a nice weekend!’  Then she was gone, and Rhett and Link were finally alone, both two troubled to say anything. Finally, it was Rhett who said -'Well, let’s just check the tape. I really wanna get home and relax.’

The film started rolling. The two men stood in front of the screen in silence yet alert, watching each other’s gestures and expressions on film. Normally, this would have been their favourite moment to make silly comments about one another, but today their minds were too occupied to say a word.

Rhett felt his heart shattering into a million pieces watching his friend's gougeous body on screen, thinking they would never really be together as lovers. Then the moment he had feared to witness was replayed, and he saw the unhidden thirst and longing in his eyes as he was watching his near-naked friend. There was no way that wasn’t obvious to anyone watching this episode. Rhett clenched his fist tightly, subconciously reflecting Link’s similar gesture on screen, not knowing what to do next.

Link had been watching the video next to his friend, deep in his thoughts. It didn’t seem to bad, which was relieving - he could not have gone through all that again. He couldn’t stop admiring his friend, who despite his discomfort, stood there like a brave viking warrior, taking the hits, baring all, and joking. Link was constantly looking for hints about Rhett’s feelings in the man's eyes, but he just couldn’t be sure. Not until that very moment, when Rhett turned his head his way, and for a split second, revealed all his deep emotions for the world to see. For Link to see.

Now he was sure. Link felt the tight knot in his throat open and fade as a new more exciting pressure started building up inside him. He could feel the heat radiating from the man next to him. A faint fragrance was sorrounding him - the familiar scent of Rhett's deodorant and aftershave. He had goose bumps all over his body. The air felt heavier to breathe. But he was so sure, after all these years, finally.

No words were needed. It was all so clear now. In silence they turned to face each other, feeling an almost unbearable warmth spread through out their bodies. Finally, Link was there to comfort Rhett and to make him feel beautiful, taking away all of his insecureties. At last they had the permission to touch, to feel, to love without boundaries. They had each other, and that was all they had ever needed.

Later, as they were laying on the sofa, Link curling Rhett’s cheast hair around his finger, Rhett’s warm hand firmly on his back, Link lazily lifted his face to look into his friend’s eyes. These were the eyes he had longed to see, eyes as deep as the universe, eyes with no secrets, filled with love. For a moment, he just let himself sink into those eyes, until he was able to ask -'So, what are we going to do with that episode? It’s kinda revealing, in more ways than one.’

Rhett’s face lit up like the sun as he pulled Link even closer and answered -'Let’s just post it. It’ll give them something to talk about!’

The end

I’d love to hear your comments about this story, and I hope you enjoyed reading it! Thanks for reading!

[mysteryshelf]

BLOG TOUR - Bones to Pick

  Welcome to

THE PULP AND MYSTERY SHELF!

DISCLAIMER: This content has been provided to THE PULP AND MYSTERY SHELF by Partners in Crime Book Tours. No compensation was received. This information required by the Federal Trade Commission.

Bones To Pick

by Linda Lovely

on Tour October 16 – December 16, 2017

Synopsis:

Living on a farm with four hundred goats and a cantankerous carnivore isn’t among vegan chef Brie Hooker’s list of lifetime ambitions. But she can’t walk away from her Aunt Eva, who needs help operating her dairy.

Once she calls her aunt’s goat farm home, grisly discoveries offer ample inducements for Brie to employ her entire vocabulary of cheese-and-meat curses. The troubles begin when the farm’s pot-bellied pig unearths the skull of Eva’s husband, who disappeared years back. The sheriff, kin to the deceased, sets out to pin the murder on Eva. He doesn’t reckon on Brie’s resolve to prove her aunt’s innocence. Death threats, ruinous pedicures, psychic shenanigans, and biker bar fisticuffs won’t stop Brie from unmasking the killer, even when romantic befuddlement throws her a curve.

Book Details:

Genre: Humorous Cozy Mystery Published by: Henery Press Publication Date: Oct. 24, 2017 Number of Pages: 266 ISBN: 9781635112597 Series: Brie Hooker Mystery, #1 Get Your Copy of Bones To Pick by Linda Lovely at: Amazon Barnes & Noble Goodreads

Read an excerpt:

ONE

Hello, I’m Brie, and I’m a vegan.

It sounds like I’m introducing myself at a Vegetarians Anonymous meeting. But, trust me, there aren’t enough vegetarians in Ardon County, South Carolina, to make a circle much less hold a meeting.

Give yourself ten points if you already know vegans are even pickier than vegetarians. We forgo meat, fish, eggs, and dairy. But we’re big on cashews, walnuts, and almonds. All nuts are good nuts. Appropriate with my family.

Family. That’s why I put my career as a vegan chef on hold to live and work in Ardon, a strong contender for the South’s carnivore-and- grease capital. My current job? I help tend four hundred goats, make verboten cheese, and gather eggs I’ll never poach. Most mornings when Aunt Eva rousts me before the roosters, I roll my eyes and mutter.

Still, I can’t complain. I had a choice. Sort of. Blame it on the pig—Tammy the Pig—for sticking her snout in our family business.

  I’d consorted with vegans and vegetarians for too long. I seriously underestimated how much cholesterol meat eaters could snarf down at a good old-fashioned wake. Actually, I wasn’t sure this wake was “old fashioned,” but it was exactly how Aunt Lilly would have planned her own send-off—if she’d had the chance. Ten days ago, the feisty sixty- two-year-old had a toddler’s curiosity and a twenty-year-old’s appetite for adventure. Her death was a total shock.

I glanced at Aunt Lilly’s epitaph hanging behind the picnic buffet. She’d penned it years back. Her twin, Aunt Eva, found it in Lilly’s desk and reprinted it in eighty-point type.

  “There once was a farmer named Lilly

Who never liked anything frilly,

She tended her goats,

Sowed a few wild oats,

And said grieving her death would be silly.”

  In a nod to Lilly’s spirit, Aunt Eva planned today’s wake complete with fiddling, hooch, goo-gogs of goat cheese, and the whole panoply of Southern fixins—mounds of country ham, fried chicken, barbecue, and mac-and-cheese awash in butter. Every veggie dish came dressed with bacon crumbles, drippings, or cream of mushroom soup.

Not a morsel fit for a vegan. Eva’s revenge. I’d made the mistake of saying I didn’t want to lose her, too, and hinted she’d live longer if she cut back on cholesterol. Not my smartest move. The name of her farm? Udderly Kidding Dairy. Cheese and eggs had been Eva’s meal ticket for decades.

My innocent observation launched a war. Whenever I opened the refrigerator, I’d find a new message. This morning a Post-it on my dish of blueberries advised: The choline in eggs may enhance brain development and memory—as a vegan you probably forgot.

Smoke from the barbeque pit permeated the air as I replenished another platter of shredded pork on the buffet. My mouth watered and I teetered on the verge of drooling. While I was a dedicated vegan, my olfactory senses were still programmed “Genus Carnivorous.” My stomach growled—loudly. Time to thwart its betrayal with the veggies and hummus dip I’d stashed in self-defense.

I’d just stuck a juicy carrot in my mouth when a large hand squeezed my shoulder.

“Brie, honey, you’ve been working nonstop,” Dad said. “Take a break. Mom’s on her way. We can play caterers. The food’s prepared. No risks associated with our cooking.”

I choked on my carrot and sputtered. “Good thing. Do you even remember the last time Mom turned on an oven?”

Dad smiled. “Can’t recall. Maybe when you were a baby? But, hey, we’re wizards at takeout and microwaves.”

His smile faltered. I caught him staring at Aunt Lilly’s epitaph. “Still can’t believe Lilly’s gone.” He attempted a smile. “Knowing her sense of humor, we’re lucky she didn’t open that epitaph with ‘There once was a lass from Nantucket.’”

I’d never seen Dad so sad. Lilly’s unexpected death stunned him to his core. He adored his older sisters.

Mom appeared at his side and wrapped an arm around his waist. She loved her sisters-in-law, too, though she complained my childless aunts spoiled me beyond repair.

Of course, Lilly’s passing hit Eva the hardest. A fresh boatload of tears threatened as I thought about the aunt left behind. I figured my tear reservoir had dried up after days of crying. Wrong. The tragedy—a texting teenager smashing head-on into Lilly’s car—provoked a week- long family weep-a-thon. It ended when Eva ordered us to cease and desist.

“This isn’t what Lilly would want,” she declared. “We’re gonna throw a wake. One big, honking party.”

Which explained the fifty-plus crowd of friends and neighbors milling about the farm, tapping their feet to fiddlin’, and consuming enough calories to sustain the populace of a small principality for a week.

I hugged Dad. “Thanks. I could use a break. I’ll find Eva. See how she’s doing.”

I spotted her near a flower garden filled with cheery jonquils. It looked like a spring painting. Unfortunately, the cold March wind that billowed Eva’s scarlet poncho argued the blooms were false advertising. The weatherman predicted the thermometer would struggle to reach the mid-forties today.

My aunt’s build was what I’d call sturdy, yet Eva seemed to sway in the gusty breeze as she chatted with Billy Jackson, the good ol’ boy farrier who shod her mule. Though my parents pretended otherwise, we all knew Billy slept under Eva’s crazy quilt at least two nights a week.

I nodded at the couple. Well, actually, the foursome. Brenda, the farm’s spoiled pet goat, and Kai, Udderly’s lead Border collie, were competing with Billy for my aunt’s attention.

“Mom and Dad are watching the buffet,” I said. “Thought I’d see if you need me to do anything. Are you expecting more folks?”

“No.” Eva reached down and tickled the tiny black goat’s shaggy head. “Imagine everyone who’s coming is here by now. They’ll start clearing out soon. Chow down and run. Can’t blame ’em. Especially the idiot women who thought they ought to wear dresses. That biting wind’s gotta be whistling up their drawers.”

Billy grinned as he looked Eva up and down. Her choice of wake attire—poncho, black pants, and work boots—surprised no one, and would have delighted Lilly.

“Do you even own a dress?” Billy laughed. “You’re one to talk.” Eva gave his baggy plaid suit and clip-on bowtie the stink eye. “I suppose you claim that gristle on your chin is needed to steady your fiddle.”

He kissed Eva’s cheek. “Yep, that’s it. Time to rejoin my fellow fiddlers, but first I have a hankering to take a turn at the Magic Moonshine tent.”

“You do that. Maybe the ’shine will improve your playing. It’ll definitely make you sound better to your listening audience. After enough of that corn liquor even my singing could win applause.”

A dark-haired stranger usurped Billy’s place, bending low to plant a kiss on the white curls that sprang from my aunt’s head like wood shavings. Wow.

They stacked handsome tall when they built him. Had to be at least six-four.

Even minus an introduction, I figured this tall glass of sweet tea had to be Paint, the legendary owner of Magic Moonshine. Sunlight glinted off hair the blue-black of expensive velvet. Deep dimples. Rakish smile.

I’d spent days sobbing, and my libido apparently was saying “enough”—time to rejoin the living. If this bad boy were any more alive, he’d be required to wear a “Danger High Voltage” sign. Of course, Aunt Lilly wouldn’t mind. She’d probably rent us a room.

I ventured a glance and found him smiling at me. My boots were suddenly fascinating. Never stare at shiny objects with the potential to hypnotize. I refused to fall under another playboy’s spell.

“How’s my best gal?” he asked, hugging Eva. “Best for this minute, right?” my aunt challenged. “I bet my niece will be your best gal before I finish the introductions.” Eva put a hand on my shoulder. “Paint, this young whippersnapper is Brie Hooker, my favorite niece. ’Course, she’s my only niece. Brie, it’s with great trepidation that I introduce you to David Paynter, better known as Paint, unrepentant moonshiner and heartbreaker.”

Eva subjected Paint to her pretend badass stare, a sure sign he was one of her favorite sparring partners. “Don’t you go messing with Brie, or I’ll bury you down yonder with Mark, once I nail his hide.”

Paint laughed, a deep, rumbling chuckle. He turned toward me and bowed like Rhett Butler reincarnated.

“Pleased to meet you, Brie. That puzzled look tells me you haven’t met Mark, the wily coyote that harasses Eva’s goats. She’s wasted at least six boxes of buckshot trying to scare him off. Me? I’ll gladly risk her shotgun to make your acquaintance. I’ve heard a lot about you.”

Eva gave Paint a shove. “Well, if that’s the case, go on. Give Brie a shot of your peach moonshine. It’s pretty good.”

“Peach moonshine it is,” he said and took my arm. A second later, he tightened his grip and pulled me to the right. “Better watch your step. You almost messed up those pretty boots.”

He pointed at a fresh pile of fragrant poop, steaming in the brisk air inches from my suede boots. “Thanks,” I mumbled. Still holding my arm, he steered me over uneven ground to a clear path. “Eva says you’re staying with her. Hope you don’t have to leave for a while. Your aunt’s a fine lady, and it’s going to be mighty hard on her once this flock of well-wishers flies off.”

His baritone sent vibrations rippling through my body. My brain ordered me to ignore the tingling that remained in places it didn’t belong.

He smiled. “Eva and Lilly spoke about you so often I feel like we’re already friends. ’Course head-shaking accompanied some of their comments. They said you’d need to serve plenty of my moonshine if you ever opened a vegan B&B in Ardon County. Here abouts it’s considered unpatriotic to serve eats that haven’t been baptized in a vat of lard. Vegetables are optional; meat, mandatory.”

Uh, oh. I always gave relatives and friends a free pass on good- natured kidding. But a stranger? This man was poking fun at my profession, yet my hackles—smoothed by the hunk’s lopsided grin— managed only a faint bristle.

Back away. Pronto.

Discovering my ex-fiancé, Jack, was boffing not one, but two co-workers the entire two years we were engaged made me highly allergic to lady-killers. Paint was most definitely a member of that tribe.

“What can I say? I’m a rebel,” I replied. “It’s my life’s ambition to convince finger-lickin’, fried-chicken lovers that life without meat, butter, eggs, and cheese does not involve a descent into the nine circles of hell.”

Paint released me, then raised his hand to brush a wayward curl from my forehead. His flirting seemed to be congenital.

“If you’re as feisty as your aunt claims, why don’t you take me on as a challenge? I do eat tomatoes—fried green ones, anyway—and I’m open to sampling other members of the vegetable kingdom. So long as they don’t get between me and my meat. Anyway, welcome to the Carolina foothills. Time to pour some white lightning. It’s smoother than you might expect.”

And so are you. Too smooth for me.

That’s when we heard the screams.

TWO

Paint zoomed off like a Clemson running back, hurtling toward the screams—human, not goat. I managed to stay within a few yards of him, slipping and sliding as my suede boots unwittingly smooshed a doggie deposit. Udderly’s guardian dogs, five Great Pyrenees, were large enough to saddle, and their poop piles rivaled cow paddies.

I reached the barn, panting, with a stitch in my right side. I stopped to catch my breath. Hallelujah. I braced my palm against the weathered barn siding.

Ouch. Harpooned by a jagged splinter. Blood oozed from the sensitive pad below my right thumb. I stared at the inch-plus spear. Paint had kept running. He was no longer in sight.

The screams stopped. An accident? A heart attack? I hustled around the corner of the barn. A little girl sobbed in the cleared area behind Udderly’s retail sales cabin. I recognized Jenny, a rambunctious five-year-old from a nearby farm. Her mother knelt beside her, stroking her hair.

No child had produced the operatic screams we’d heard. Maybe Jenny’s mother was the screamer. But the farm wife didn’t seem the hysterical type. On prior visits to Udderly, I’d stopped at the roadside stand where she sold her family’s produce. Right now the woman’s face looked redder than one of her Early Girl tomatoes. Was the flush brought on by some danger—a goat butting her daughter, a snake slithering near the little girl?

I walked closer. Then I saw it. A skull poked through the red clay. Soil had tinted the bone an absurd pink.

I gasped. The sizeable cranium looked human. I spotted the grave digger, or should I say re-digger. Udderly’s newest addition, a Vietnamese potbellied pig named Tammy, hunkered in a nearby puddle. Tiny cloven hoof marks led to and from the excavation. Tell-tale red mud dappled her dainty twitching snout. The pig’s hundred-pound body quivered as her porcine gaze roved the audience she’d attracted.

A man squatted beside Tammy, speaking to the swine in soothing, almost musical tones. Pigs were dang smart and sensitive. Aunt Eva told me it was easy to hurt their feelings. The fellow stroking Tammy’s grimy head must’ve been convinced she was one sensitive swine.

“It’s okay,” he repeated. “The lady wasn’t screaming at you, Tammy.”

Tammy snorted, lowered her head, and squeezed her eyes shut. The pig-whisperer gave the swine a final scratch and stood, freeing gangly limbs from his pretzel-like crouch. Mud caked the cuffs and knees of his khaki pants. Didn’t seem to bother him one iota.

The mother shepherded her little girl away from the disturbing scene, and Paint knelt to examine the skeletal remains. “Looks like piggy uncovered more than she bargained for.” He glanced at Muddy Cuffs. “Andy, you’re a vet. Animal or human?”

“Human.” Andy didn’t hesitate. “But all that’s left is bone. Had to have been buried a good while. Yet Tammy’s rooting scratched only inches below the surface. If a settler dug this grave, it was mighty shallow.”

“Probably didn’t start that way.” I pointed to a depression that began uphill near the retail cabin. “This wash has deepened a lot since my aunts built their store and the excavation diverted water away from the cabin. The runoff’s been nibbling away at the ground.”

Mom, Dad, and Aunt Eva joined the group eyeballing the skull. Eva looked peaked, almost ill. I felt a slight panic at the shift in her normally jolly appearance. I thought of my aunts as forces of nature. Unflappable. Indestructible. I’d lost one, and the other suddenly looked fragile. Finding a corpse on her property the same day she bid her twin goodbye had hit her hard.

Dad cocked his head. “Could be a Cherokee burial site. Or maybe a previous farmer buried a loved one and the grave marker got lost. Homestead burials have always been legal in South Carolina. Still are.”

For once, the idea of finding a corpse in an unexpected location didn’t prompt a gleeful chuckle from my dad, Dr. Howard Hooker. Though he was a professor of horticulture at Clemson University by day, he was an aspiring murder mystery author by night. Every time we went for a car ride, Dad made a game of searching the landscape for spots “just perfect” for disposing of bodies. So far, a dense patch of kudzu in a deep ravine topped his picks. “Kudzu grows so fast any flesh peeking through would disappear in a day.”

Good thing Dad confined his commentary to family outings. We knew the corpses in question weren’t real.

Mom whipped out her smartphone. “I’ll call Judge Glenn. It’s Sunday, but he always answers his cell. He’ll know who to call. I’m assuming the Ardon County Sheriff’s Department.”

Dad nodded. “Probably, but I bet SLED—the South Carolina Law Enforcement Division—will take over. The locals don’t have forensic specialists.”

Mom rolled her eyes. “You spend way too much time with your Sisters in Crime.”

It amused Mom that Dad’s enthusiasm for his literary genre earned him the presidency of the Upstate South Carolina Chapter of Sisters in Crime.

Mom didn’t fool with fictional crime. Too busy with the real thing. As the City of Clemson’s attorney, she kept a bevy of lawyers, judges, and city and university cops on speed dial. However, Udderly Kidding wasn’t in the same county as Clemson so it sat outside her domain.

“Judge Glenn, this is Iris Hooker. I’m at the Udderly Kidding Dairy in Ardon. An animal here unearthed a skull. We think it’s human, but not recent. Should we call the sheriff?”

Mom nodded and made occasional I-get-it noises while she clamped the cell to her ear.

“Could you ask them to keep their arrival quiet? Better yet, could they wait until after four? About fifty folks are here for my sister-in- law’s wake. I don’t want to turn her farewell into a circus.”

A minute later, Mom murmured her thanks and pocketed her cell. “The judge agrees an old skull doesn’t warrant sirens or flashing lights. He’ll ask the Ardon County Sheriff, Robbie Jones, to come by after four. Since I’m an officer of the court, his honor just requested that I keep people and animals clear of the area until the sheriff arrives.”

Andy stood. “Paint, help me bring some hay bales from the barn. We can stack them to cordon off the area.”

“Good idea.” Paint stood, and the two men strode off. No needless chitchat. They appeared to be best buds.

I tugged Dad’s sleeve, nodded toward his sister, and whispered, “I think Aunt Eva should sit down. Let’s get her to one of the front porch rockers.”

Dad walked over and draped an arm around his sister’s shoulders. “Eva, let’s sit a while so folks can find you to pay their respects. This skeleton is old news. Not our worry.”

Eva’s lips trembled. “No, Brother. I feel it in my own bones. It’s that son-of-a-bitch Jed Watson come back to haunt me.”

THREE

Jed Watson? The man Eva married in college? The man who vanished a few years later?

Dad’s eyebrows shot up. “Eva, that’s nonsense. That dirtbag ran off forty years back. You’re letting your imagination run wild.”

Eva straightened. “Some crime novelist you are. You know darn well any skeleton unearthed on my property would have something to do with that nasty worm. Nobody wished that sorry excuse for a man dead more than me.”

“Calm down. Don’t spout off and give the sheriff some harebrained notion that pile of bones is Jed,” Dad said. “No profit in fueling gossip or dredging up ancient history. Authorities may have ruled Jed dead, but I always figured that no-good varmint was still alive five states over, most likely beating the stuffing out of some other poor woman.”

Wow. I knew Eva took her maiden name back after they declared her husband dead, but I’d never heard a speck of the unsavory backstory. Dad liked to tell family tales, including ones about long- dead scoundrels. Guess this history wasn’t ancient enough.

Curiosity made me eager to ask a whole passel of none-of-my- business questions, though I felt some justification about poking my nose here. I’d known Eva my entire life. So how come this was the first I’d heard of a mystery surrounding Jed’s disappearance? Was Dad truly worried the sheriff might suspect Eva?

I was dying to play twenty questions. Too bad it wasn’t the time or place.

I smiled at my aunt. “Why don’t I get some of Paint’s brew to settle our nerves? Eva, you like that apple pie flavor, right?”

“Yes, thanks, dear.”

“Good idea, Brie,” Dad added. “I’ll take a toot of Paint’s blackberry hooch. Eva’s not the only one who could use a belt. We’ll greet folks from those rockers. Better than standing like mannequins in a receiving line. And there’s a lot less risk of falling down if we get a little tipsy.”

Aunt Eva ignored Dad’s jest. She looked haunted, lost in memory. A very bad memory.

I hurried to the small tent where Magic Moonshine dispensed free libations. A buxom young lass smiled as she poured shine into miniature Mason jars lined up behind four flavor signs: Apple Pie, Blackberry, Peach, and White Lightnin’.

“What can I do you for, honey?” the busty server purred. I’m still an Iowa girl at heart, but, like my transplanted aunts and parents, I’ve learned not to take offense when strangers of both sexes and all ages call me honey, darlin’, and sweetie. My high school social studies teacher urged us to appreciate foreign customs and cultures. I may not be in Rome, but I’m definitely in Ardon County.

I smiled at Miss Sugarmouth. The top four buttons of her blouse were undone. The way her bosoms oozed over the top, I seriously doubted those buttons had ever met their respective buttonholes. No mystery why Paint hired her. Couldn’t blame him or her. Today’s male mourners would enjoy a dash of cleavage with their shine, and she’d rake in lots more tips.

“Sweetie, do you have a tray I can use to take drinks to the folks on the porch?”

The devil still made me add the “sweetie” when I addressed Miss Sugarmouth. She didn’t bat an eyelash. Probably too weighed down with mascara.

“Sure thing, honey.” I winced when the tray slid over the wood sliver firmly embedded in my palm. Suck it up. No time for minor surgery.

As I walked toward Eva’s cabin, crunching noises advertised some late arrivals ambling down the gravel road. On the porch, Dad and Eva had settled into a rhythm, shaking hands with friends and neighbors and accepting sympathy pats. Hard to hug someone in a rocker.

I handed miniature glass jars to Eva and Dad before offering drinks to the folks who’d already run the gauntlet of the sit-down receiving line. Then I tiptoed behind Dad’s rocker.

“I’ll see if Mom wants anything and check back later to see how you and Eva are doing.”

“Thanks, honey.” He kissed my cheek. I returned to Paint’s moonshine stand and picked up a second drink tray, gingerly hoisting it to avoid bumping my skewered palm. Balancing the drinks, I picked my way across the rutted ground to what I worried might be a crime scene.

Mom perched between Paint and Andy atop the double row of hay bales stacked to keep the grisly discovery out of sight. The five-foot-two height on Mom’s driver’s license was a stretch. At five-four, I had her by at least three, maybe four, inches. My mother’s build was tiny as well as short—a flat-chested size two. I couldn’t recall ever being able to squeeze into her doll-size clothes. My build came courtesy of the females on Dad’s side of the family. Compact but curvy. No possibility of going braless in polite society.

Mom’s delicate appearance often confounded the troublemakers she prosecuted for the city. Too often the accused took one look at Iris Hooker and figured they’d hire some hulking male lawyer to walk all over the little lady in court.

Big mistake. The bullies often reaped unexpected rewards—a costly mélange of jail time, fines, and community service.

Mom spotted my tray-wobbling approach. “Are these Paint’s concoctions?”

I nodded. “Well, Daughter, sip nice and slow. Someday I may file charges against Magic Moonshine. Paint’s shine is often an accomplice when Clemson tailgaters pull stunts that land them in front of a judge.”

Paint lifted his glass in a salute. “Can I help it if all our flavors go down easy?”

Mom turned back to me. “Have you met these, ahem, gentlemen?”

I suddenly felt shy as my gaze flicked between the two males. “I met Paint earlier. This is my first chance to say hi to Andy. I’m Brie Hooker. You must be the veterinarian Aunt Eva’s always talking about.”

Andy rose to his feet. “Andy Green. Pleased to meet you, ma’am. Your aunts were my very first customers when I opened my practice.”

He waved a hand at Tammy, the now demure pig, wallowing a goodly distance away. “I’m really sorry Tammy picked today to root up these bones. I feel partly to blame. Talked your aunts into adopting Miss Piggy. It aggravates me how folks can’t resist buying potbellied pigs as pets when they’re adorable babies, but have no qualms about abandoning them once they start to grow.”

Andy’s outstretched hand awaited my handshake. I held up my palm to display my injury. “Gotta take a rain check on a handshake. Unfortunately, I already shook hands with the barn.”

Andy gently turned up my palm. “I’ll fix you right up, if you don’t mind a vet doing surgery. Give me a minute to wash up and meet me at my truck. Can’t miss it. A double-cab GMC that kinda looks like aliens crash landed an aluminum spaceship in the truck bed. I’m parked by the milking barn.”

As Andy loped off toward the retail shop’s comfort station, Paint called after him. “Sneaky way to hold hands with a pretty lady.”

Andy glanced over his shoulder and grinned. “You’re just mad you didn’t think of it first.”

Paint chuckled and focused his hundred-watt grin on me. “Bet my white lightning could disinfect that sliver. Sure you don’t want me to do the honors?”

I couldn’t help but laugh. “Somehow I doubt honor has anything to do with it.”

The moonshiner faked an injured look. Mom rolled her eyes. “Heaven help me—and you, Brie. Not sure you’re safe with the wildlife that frequents this farm. Forget those coyotes that worry Eva, I’m talking wolves.” She looked toward the porch. “How’s Eva holding up?”

“Better.” I wanted to grill Mom about Jed Watson, but I needed to do so in private. “Guess I should steel myself for surgery.” I took a Mason jar from the tray I’d set on a hay bale. “Down the hatch.” My healthy swallow blazed a burning trail from throat to belly. Before I could stop myself, I sputtered.

“Shut your mouth,” Paint said. Yowzer. My eyes watered, and my throat spasmed. I coughed. “What?”

“Shut your mouth. Oxygen fuels the burn. You need to take a swallow then close your mouth. None of this sipping stuff.”

“Now you tell me.” I choked. Mom laughed. “That’s the best strategy I’ve heard yet to shut Brie up.”

I wiped at the tears running down my cheeks. “Your moonshine packs more punch than my five-alarm Thai stir fry.”

Paint’s eyebrows rose. “My shine is smooth, once you get used to it. You want a little fire in your gut. Keeps life interesting.”

A little too interesting. I’d been at Udderly Kidding Dairy just over a week, and I already felt like a spinning top with a dangerous wobble.

***

Excerpt from Bones To Pick by Linda Lovely. Copyright © 2017 by Linda Lovely. Reproduced with permission from Linda Lovely. All rights reserved.

Author Bio:

Over the past five years, hundreds of mystery/thriller writers have met Linda Lovely at check-in for the annual Writers’ Police Academy, which she helps organize. Lovely finds writing pure fiction isn’t a huge stretch given the years she’s spent penning PR and ad copy. She writes a blend of mystery and humor, chuckling as she plots to “disappear” the types of characters who most annoy her. Quite satisfying plus there’s no need to pester relatives for bail. Her newest series offers good-natured salutes to both her vegan family doctor and her cheese-addicted kin. She served as president of her local Sisters in Crime chapter for five years and belongs to International Thriller Writers and Romance Writers of America.

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BLOG TOUR – Bones to Pick was originally published on the Wordpress version of The Pulp and Mystery Shelf with Shannon Muir

[riddlesrhinkyfics]

Inspired by a special friend ❤️

I’d always wanted to see LA. So this time when I was visiting you, you decided to take me all over your beautiful country. “I’m gonna take you to the city of the McLaughlin.” you had said to me. Of course, we weren’t expecting to see Rhett out there. We’d joked about what it would be like to have a threesome with him, but he only had to exist in our fantasies. We were pretty content with taking care of each other’s satisfaction ourselves. My girlfriend knew what got me going, no problem!

 We arrived in LA that morning, and checked into our hotel room. Nothing could stop us from getting our hands on each other. After a giggly, naked, orgasm filled morning, we decided to step out into the beautifully sunny day, in our little shorts and tank tops. We reached outside the hotel, ready to go shopping. And as I saw you put on your sunglasses, I couldn’t help but say, “You look so hot, babe!” And you replied, “No love. WE look hot.” and you pulled out your camera, and hugged me for a selfie. We really did look good, didn’t we? We took a few more pictures of us, laughing, being silly, kissing, posing.

 As we walked through the streets, we went into a number of stores, trying on posh Hollywood dresses that we couldn’t afford, trying on jewellery we didn’t really want to buy. Once we even to a wedding store, pretending to be an engaged couple, looking for wedding stuff. That was our silly idea of having fun. And then at the corner I spot a shop I NEED to go into. “Good Vibrations - Adult Novelty Store”.

 “Let’s go!” I screamed, and pulled you in. You laughed and followed me, making fun of my enthusiasm. We browsed together for a few minutes before I spotted a big, thick, purple dildo (batteries included). “Oh my god, I want this one!”

 “Babe, we got vibrators already!” you reminded me.

 “Yeah, but we don’t have anything big like this one. The vibrators are tiny. They’re not really for… putting IN.” I said, with my eyes wide open at you.

 “Okay.” you said as you picked it up, and walked towards the billing counter. As you handed the cashier the dildo, I looked at him and said with the biggest, “My girlfriend buys me the best presents, doesn’t she?”

 “Oh yes, she’s a keeper.” he winked at me, and I kissed your cheek. You rolled your eyes at me and my drama.

 We decided to stop for a coffee, and you took me to a nearby Starbucks. “Could you be any more American?” I said, teasing you.

 “Says the girl who can’t go five hours without a coffee.” you said, looking at me, and not looking where you were walking and BAM. Running into something tall and bearded.

 “I’m sorry miste…” you began saying, but your mouth fell open as you looked up at the man. I saw your dazed expression, and followed your gaze to the man too. And there we were, staring at the majestically beautiful, Rhett McLaughlin, in the middle of the crowded Starbucks, with his coffee spilled on the floor, thanks to my dear girlfriend.

“Oops. I’m so sorry!” you said.

 “Don’t worry, that’s okay.” he replied back to you, with a smile. It really was him, wasn’t it?

 “Rhett.” I said, stupidly, without realising the redundancy of telling the man his own name.

 “Yes?” he asked me. I had no answer. I had simply stated what was in front of my eyes. I wasn’t calling for attention.

 I muttered a meek “nothing” and he laughed. “Can I know your names?” he had to ask. We had forgotten all courtesies of meeting someone apparently.

 “I’m Riley. And this is my girlfriend Riddhi.” you said confidently. I was glad you had gotten over spilling Rhett’s coffee, and taken over the responsibility of being the confident one.

 “We love you.” I blurted out, and then turned red.

 Rhett’s eyes got even bulgier if that was possible, and he laughed. “Wow! I’m very lucky then. Let me buy you girls coffees too, along with another one for myself.” he said, patting down his shirt. We saw him walk towards the counter, and I immediately grabbed your arm.

 “RILEY! Tell me this is a dream. Pinch me. Right now!” I squealed.

 “Listen Riddhi. Pull it together. The universe wants this to happen okay?” I nodded at you, trying ot brace myself. “This is our chance to make all our fantasies come true. Take a deep breath.” you continued.

 I nodded again, and said, “Okay. Okay! We’re doing this. But how!? How do we indicate that we want this?”

 “We don’t indicate silly! We tell him.” you said, and immediately turned to Rhett, who was carrying three coffees in a tray.

 “Rhett, we had an idea. How would you like to accompany us to our hotel room for a few hours?” you said confidently, and that was so sexy to me, that I wanted to take you right there on that table. I didn’t even care about Rhett for a second.

 “Now that’s an idea. I guess the coffees will have to wait.” he said, placing them down on the table, and placing his large hands on the small of our backs, and I looked at him, dazed, still wondering whether I was dreaming.

It seemed like it only took us two minutes to get to our hotel. Before we knew it, we were inside our room, having no words spoken on the way, but I noticed our breathing getting louder. A fantasy like this coming true had to be savoured. As we entered the room, I felt shy looking at Rhett there with us. So I decided to focus my attention on you. You looked breathtaking as always, even more so because of your radiating confidence.

 “Rhett, why don’t you have a seat?” You said to him, and then turned towards me. “Let’s put on a little show for our guest, sweetie.” and you pulled me towards you. I stumbled on my step, and held your waist. You placed your arms on my shoulders and pulled me in for a kiss. I got more comfortable as our kiss got deeper. I saw Rhett out of the corner of my eye, sat on the big chair, with his knees apart, looking at us and licking his lips.

 You held my hair in your hand, and moved your kisses to my jaw, and then my neck. My hands made their way, involuntarily up your shirt. It felt more than natural to do that.

 “What do you wanna see, big boy?” you asked Rhett, and I saw him smirking at you. He was clearly smitten by you. And I couldn’t blame him. Then he looked at me.

 “Undress her, will you?” he said to me.

 I looked at you, and said, “Gladly.” and smiled. I turned you to face him, and moved behind you. Grazing your skin with my hands, I moved back up your shirt, and slowly pulled it over your head. I kissed your shoulder from behind, glancing at Rhett. “Isn’t she gorgeous?” I say to him, as I see his mouth watering looking at you in your shorts and skimpy blue bra.

 “Oh yes she is.” he said, and then looked at me. “So are you darling. Don’t sell yourself short. Lemme see a little more of you too.” And I immediately take my top off and press my boobs to your back. My hands reach the front button of your shorts, and I unbuttoned it. I slowly pushed down your shorts, and Rhett looked at your skin. And just when it seemed like you’re not wearing any panties, your tiny little blue thong is revealed, which might as well have not been there at all, cuz it wasn’t really covering anything. It just made you even sexier than usual (if that was possible) and I heard Rhett exhale a quiet “oh gosh…”.

[mythicalsecretsanta]

Christmas In Paris (T)

This gift is for: Wren (AKA @cerealbath​) Wishing you a very festive holiday season and good vibes for the coming year. Hope you enjoy your gift! From your Secret Santa, Ellie (AKA @elliefcutie)

Link to AO3, or read below:

“Link, hello earth to Link,” someone shouted. “S-s-sorry,” he stuttered in reply. They’d been waiting so long at the check in counter he’d slipped into a daydream. One where he was at home watching his favourite paint drying show instead of here in a crowded airport. “Man what are we gonna do, they’re saying my bag weighs too much?” “Why don’t you just take some stuff out? I’m pretty sure you packed your entire bedroom. Do you really need all of it?” Link asked. “Yes I need all of it,” Rhett said placing extra emphasis on the word need. “I’m used to a certain level of comfort, you know that.” Listen, all I’m saying is do you really need silk bed sheets, a fur coat and the entire contents of your bathroom for a one week vacation in Paris?“ “ You’re totally missing the point Link those aren’t just any old things those sheets are made of rare golden orb spider silk that were painstakingly pulled out individually by blind monks from Madagascar and the-” “Ok,” Link interrupted him. “I get it. I have some extra room in my bags you can use that but anything that doesn’t fit you leave behind alright? “Really?” Rhett said “You’re a lifesaver buddyroll.” So half an hour later they boarded their flight with Rhett who was now wearing his fur coat and Link’s nearly empty carry on was now stuffed full of silk bed linens, various lotions creams serums and hair styling products. Being on the plane brought Link’s anxiety up to near panic attack levels. “Why’s it gotta be so gosh dang small in here?” He’d begun sweating profusely the moisture accumulating uncomfortably in all his crevices. “You think this is small be glad you’re not me brother I got legs for days and nowhere to put em,” Link just gave a weak smile in response his arms moving to wrap around his midsection. A pathetic attempt at self comforting. Why had he agreed to come on this stupid trip in the first place? Neither of them had anything great to go home to for the holidays. Rhett’s mom had re married and now had a replacement family as Rhett called it. Link’s mom had died when he was in college. His parents had divorced when he was two and Link had never really been close with his dad. So it made sense that they’d spend the holidays together right? Better than being alone. Not that Link really minded being alone. Last year they’d stayed home and just ordered in watching Christmas movies on Netflix. For whatever reason Rhett had gotten the idea that they should go somewhere this year. Link had flat out refused at first but Rhett was very insistent. Also he was very good at getting Link to try new things. So eventually he had caved. And here they were. Link remained quiet all throughout the safety talk which increased his anxiety level even more, and takeoff. “Link you ok?” Rhett asked once they were safely in the air. “Your being awfully quiet.” “Yeah I’m fine a little tired.” Which wasn’t a total lie he was tired. Stress had a strange way of making him sleepy. “Why don’t you try to sleep we got a long flight ahead of us anyway. You can use my coat as a pillow if you want. I’m sweating to death in it anyway.” Before Link could even answer Rhett was twisting himself around to get the cumbersome thing off. It was a struggle that lasted several minutes and by the time Rhett handed him the coat he was smiling. He couldn’t really refuse it after that could he? “Thanks” he said. Propping himself up against the window he fell asleep almost immediately.

“Link, hey Link,” Rhett half whispered while nudging his shoulder. Link just groaned and pushed him away. “Lemme sleep Rhett .” “You gotta wake up buddy we’re about to land.” Link sat up his hands moving automatically to try and rub the sleep out of his eyes. “I slept through the whole flight?” he said in disbelief. “You sure did sleepyhead,” Rhett replied laughing one of his grumbling laughs. Just then the pilot came on over the intercom. “Hello this is your captain speaking we’re just beginning our descent into Paris and we should be landing in approximately twenty minutes. The weather is a chilly 50 degrees Fahrenheit with clear skies. The local time is 5:05pm. Please put you seat belts on and thanks for a great flight.” Then she said the same thing in french. At least that’s what Link assumed because he understood nothing beyond bonjour despite having taken three years of french in high school. Link immediately fastened his seat belt and looked out the window. The sun was setting and it cast a beautiful rose gold glow over the city that Link had to admit looked stunning. Link started when he felt Rhett’s beard tickling his neck. “Looks pretty great right? Don’t be shy you can say that I made a good choice. That this is gonna be a million time better than just being at home.” Link rolled his eyes. “Maybe just maybe this won’t be a total disaster.” “It’s gonna be awesome just wait until you see what I got planned,” Rhett said. His eyes and smile wide with excitement more than Link had ever seen them before. Rhett had insisted on being the sole planner of their trip. Link hadn’t protested since he didn’t really care. He fully expected to have a terrible time but his first look at the city had him feeling unexpectedly optimistic about it. He smiled back at Rhett. “So what are we doing tonight?” “There’s this really old cinema that shows old Christmas movies during December. Tonight there playing It’s a Wonderful Life. But we could do something else if you want. If you’re too tired we can just stay at the hotel.” Rhett said rather rapidly. His cheeks turning red. Link squirmed in his seat suddenly feeling very antsy. It was probably the cramped seating he just needed to stretch his legs. “That sounds really good actually.” Rhett grinned and was it Link’s imagination or did his the redness of his face deepen even more? He turned to look out the window again at the city growing ever closer.

Link swallowed the last bite of the cracker sandwich he’d been working on for the past hour and a half. He chased it with a big gulp of sparkling water. Rhett had chosen an upscale restaurant for dinner where nothing sounded familiar (mostly because of the french) or appetizing. The waiter had given him the stink eye when he’d asked for plain bread and cracker sandwich like the ones he always had at home. Rhett however had ordered a plethora of items and in french too. Link’s sandwich had come rather quickly a whole loaf of french bread and some sort of multigrain crackers that was something of a disappointment to Link. So he’d been taking halfhearted bites of it every so often while Rhett inhaled dish after dish of rich looking foods covered in cream sauces. “You sure you don’t wanna try any of my food?” Rhett asked. “No I’m good” “Come on at least have a bite of the escargot. The butter herb caviar sauce on top is absolutely divine.” “Isn’t that snails? No thanks.” Link said in disgust. “How about dessert I ordered the wildflower honey lavender gelato. That’s sorta like ice cream. You like ice cream right?” Link did in fact like ice cream one of the few things that had stuck from his brief foray into the world of tasting. The way Rhett was acting was making Link nervous. He seemed so eager for Link to be pleased that Link felt obliged to be pleased. “Sure buddy that sounds good” Rhett smiled brightly and there was that blush again. They’re dessert soon arrived in a single dish with two spoons. Link frowned his personal ice cream sharing rule was don’t unless you’re willing to make out with said person. “Sorry Link I’ll ask them for a separate bowl,” Rhett said. Link glanced around the crowded restaurant in search of wait staff to flag down and found no one. What the hell he thought. He’d flown halfway across the world today surely he could share ice cream. They had separate spoons after all. “Don’t bother,” Link took the tiny spoon on his side of the bowl and brought it up to his mouth. The gelato was amazing it had an icy smooth consistency less creamy than ice cream but sweetened perfectly with honey and just a touch of lavender to brighten it up. Link went in for a second bite and realized Rhett was just staring at him mouth agape. Which Link found odd because Rhett was never one to hesitate while eating. “Is that not ok with you? It’s because of my herpes isn’t it? I’m sorry we can order you a separate one.” “No just a little surprised it’s like your a whole different Link in Paris.” “Is that a bad thing?” “It’s interesting that’s for sure,” Rhett replied picking up his spoon.

The cool night air nipped at Link’s arms making giving him goosebumps. He was beginning to regret their decision to walk back to the hotel after the movie. Which despite Rhett’s disbelief he had never seen before. “You cold Link?” Rhett asked. “Yeah a little figures when we could actually use that ridiculous fur coat of yours we don’t have it.” “I’ll have you know that coat is made of very rare Siberian Brown Lemming fur. Which is said to be so soft it’s like wearing a cloud.” Link just rolled his eyes. “So you wanna know what on the itinerary for tomorrow?” Rhett asked. “Nah I’m sorta enjoying this whole going with the flow thing. It feels very freeing not worrying about every little thing for once.” “I get that. Let’s pick up the pace so we don’t freeze our balls off shall we.” Link let loose a high pitched giggle and began to run down the street.

Link stifled a yawn as he watched people go by on the quiet Parisian street. Rhett had dragged him outta bed at an ungodly hour and to this quaint little cafe nearby. He was currently sipping his second cup of espresso in hopes it would chase away the jet lag. “Did you not sleep well Link” Rhett asked seemingly unaffected by jet lag and entirely to chipper. “I slept fine it must be jet lag. I’ve never felt so tired in my life. You seriously don’t feel it?” “I slowly adjusted myself to Paris time over the last two weeks, remember? I asked if you wanted to join me and you declined. I’d bet you’re regretting that now.” Yes Link did seem to recall Rhett going on about that how it would eliminate jet lag and help optimize their enjoyment of the trip. But he’d said it right before bed and staying up later had seemed too difficult to an already sleepy Link. “I have just the thing to cheer you up,” Rhett said. “You wanna know what we’re doing today?” Leaving absolutely no time for Link to reply he answered his own question. “There’s this really cool winery called Le Clos Montmatre right here in the city and they give tours. Guess who’s gonna be on one of those tours?” “Us?” Link said flatly. “Bingo” “I can’t wait.”

“I think we’re lost,” Link said “We are not lost,” Rhett insisted. “Really so we were supposed to get on several different trains and then get off to stare at this map in the station? Then I guess we’re not lost after all.” “Ok, so we may be a little turned around,” Rhett said. “But we are definitely not lost. We just need to get on this train… or maybe this one.” He trailed off. “Alright we may be lost,” He finally admitted. “So why don’t we just go above ground and catch a cab or we’ll miss our tour. Besides it creeps me out down here. It’s like being buried alive.” “Because that would be admitting defeat. This is how people get around here. If we take a cab we’re missing out on the authentic Paris experience. “I don’t think part of the authentic experience is aimlessly getting on and off trains with no idea where you’re going. I’m getting a cab you can stay down here and keep having the authentic experience if you like.” Link took off toward the exit and Rhett followed.

Due to the narrow climbing roads the cab dropped them off a quarter mile from the actual winery itself. They walked in silence for a few minutes until Rhett broke it abruptly. “Sorry about this Link. It wasn’t supposed to happen like this.” Rhett said eyes on the ground as they walked along.” “What do you mean?” Link asked. He felt somewhat confused everything seemed fine to him. “It’s just I have this picture in my head of how I want things to go, you know. Reality never seems to live up to that picture. This is only the first day and already I screwed things up.” “Wait…what? You think you screwed things up?” “Well yeah you’re all jet lagged, we got lost and now we might miss our tour.” He finally looked up at Link. His amber eyes pitiful. “Rhett, you did not screw things up I will get over the jet lag, everybody gets lost in strange cities and I’m pretty sure we found the vineyard.” He pointed up to the vine covered mansion before them. It was beautiful Link was beginning to think everything in Paris was. “You really don’t think I’m screwing things up?” Rhett asked breaking eye contact with Link and looking straight ahead. “Not at all.”

“Mercie,” Rhett thanked the man who had poured their wine. The tour had been interesting. Emile,their tour guide’s enthusiasm had been contagious. They were now sitting in the cellar sampling some wine. “ “A votre sante,” Rhett said “Huh?” Link said. “Since when do you speak french?” “I learned online. I figured one of us should.” He shrugged nonchalant. “A votre sante means cheers.” They clinked glasses. Link swallowed his all in one gulp, hissing at the unpleasant burning sensation in his throat. It did taste vaguely fruity which was ok but he really couldn’t see what all the hype was about. He would choose grape juice over this any day. He glanced up at Rhett to find him staring wide eyed at him. “What? Did I spill some on my shirt or something?” he looked in panic at his white and blue striped polo. It looked alright to him. Rhett just laughed that big loud rumbling one he did when something caught him by surprise. When he caught his breath he said. “No it’s just that not how you’re supposed to do that man. It’s not like taking jello shots at a frat party.” Link blushed. “Give me a break Rhett I’ve never done this before.” “How have you never done this before?” “I just haven’t. You don’t need to laugh at me.” “Sorry Link. I guess I’ll just have to show you how it’s done. Here I’ll share mine with you.” He reached over and poured half of his glass into Link’s. “You gotta take your time with it really get to know it. Swish it around in the glass, like this.” Rhett slowly moved the stem of his glass in a circle. Link copied. “Excellent. Now go ahead and take a whiff of it. Really take in that aroma with your nose hole.” “Is this really necessary seems a little over the top to me.” “Yes it’s necessary drinking wine is all about the experience Link. It’s the only way to really detect all the nuances of flavor.” “Fine I’ll sniff the damn wine just let it be known that I think it’s ridiculous.” “I’m ok with that,” Rhett said. So Link smelled the wine. It smelled fruity and maybe a little acidic. “Mmm,” Rhett said “ A very nice smelling wine it smells full bodied with a hint of lemon verbena.” “Can we actually drink it now?” Link asked. He was beginning to lose patience with Rhett’s process. “Sure buddy but you should take small sips and aerate it by running it through your teeth.” He kindly demonstrated this and it make the most horrendous noise. “There’s no way I’m doing that. You’ll have to settle for me taking small sips.” “Your loss. I’ll be over here experiencing the full flavor of wine as intended.” Link rolled his eyey as he brought the glass to his lips. He did keep it in his mouth a little and to his surprise he noticed the hint of citrus Rhett had mentioned. Also the burning sensation was much milder and pleasant this time around. “This is pretty good actually,” “See I told you,” Rhett said practically beaming. “You have to do it the right way for optimal enjoyment.” Link smiled with a shake of his head. They continued their tasting mostly in silence with only an occasional interjection from Rhett about the flavours of the different wines. Once the wine had all been tasted Emile cleared her throat to get their attention. “So that concludes the wine tasting portion of the tour. We’re going to finish off the tour by going to see our fields. They have a very unique graded set up that offers up some wonderful views of the city. So feel free to stick around afterwards to take some pictures. Link pushed his seat back as he got up he felt dizzy and had to brace himself on the table. “Whoa, you alright there Link? The wine gettin’ to ya?” “I’m alright,” Link replied. “Just felt a little unsteady there.” Truthfully Link felt very strange maybe he shouldn’t have had so much wine. He figured he would be fine the tour was almost over anyway. It was a struggle to keep himself steady as the walked but he managed it. They emerged into the sunshine at the bottom of a steep incline. Now he knew what Emile had meant by graded set up. It looked like they had carved the vineyard right out of the hillside. It was possibly one of the most unique things Link had ever seen. Unfortunately he wasn’t really in a state to enjoy it. The feeling of unease that he’d felt in the cellar seemed to be growing by the minute. Everything after that was pretty fuzzy until Rhett elbowed him in the ribs. Hey Link mind if we go to the top I really wanna get some pictures.” “Yeah sure sounds great,” Link said. He did not in fact think it was great. He had no idea how he was going to make it up there. Rhett chattered away at him as they climbed. “That was pretty awesome right Link? Wait till you see what I have planned for tomorrow. It’s even better I think gotta make Christmas Eve special right? Link just nodded. As they neared the top Link’s head was spinning so bad he had to sit down. “Hey Rhett,” he said his words coming out slurred. “I’m not feeling so well.” He then proceeded to vomit in the bushes beside him. Rhett rushed to his side putting his hand softly in the small of Link’s back as he wretched the meager contents of his stomach onto the foliage. “Oh Link I’m so sorry. You’re kind of a lightweight hey? Don’t worry we’ll get you back to the hotel and you’ll be better in no time.” Link finished vomiting and sat back up wiping the mix of throw up and spit on his jacket sleeve. “You get it all out?” “I think so.” “Good, good you just stay right there I’m gonna order us an Uber ok?” He pulled out his phone typing away at it furiously. A few minutes later he pocketed it. “It’ll be here in 20 but we’re gonna have to walk a little to get there. Think you can do that?” Link nodded. “Alright let me help you there.” Rhett said. He crouched down slinging Link’s arm over his shoulder. “We’re gonna try standing on three. One..two…three.” They struggled up together Rhett doing most of the heavy lifting Link only managing to fall into Rhett’s arms. Link’s only thought was that he smelled good some sort of deep musky scent. “Ok we made it up good job. Now let’s get you straightened out.” Link reached out weakly trying to pull him back in but Rhett didn’t even seem to notice. “You think you’re ok to walk?” “Yeah I think so.” Slowly they made their way back down where a concerned looking Emile met them. “Mon dieu. Is your husband okay Rhett?” “He’s not really much of a drinker. I shouldn’t have let hi drink so much. We’re just going to leave now. Thanks for the lovely tour and sorry about the bushes.” Link grimaced at that bit. “Yeah I’m very sorry about that,’ he added. Wait had she just called him Rhett’s husband why would she think that? Before Link could think about it too much Rhett was walking again taking Link with him. Somehow they made it to the Uber without incident. Rhett helped Link and spoke with the driver while Link just sat there willing himself not to vomit again. “Link?” “Yeah,” Link answered feeling very sleepy all of a sudden. “Driver says it’s gonna be half an hour to the hotel. You just tell me if we need to pull over again okay?” “Sure. Rhett?’ “Yes Link?’ “I’m sleepy.” “That’s just fine you just put you’re head on my shoulder and close your eyes,” “Thanks Rhett,” Link said as he did exactly that. He gave a contented sigh happy to be smelling that Rhett smell again.

The next thing Link really remembers is walking up with a dry mouth, splitting headache and a bladder that’s about to burst. He groans as he sits up in bed. Yes he’s in a bed in his and Rhett’s hotel room. They’re sharing a room because according to Rhett this is the only hotel to stay in, in Paris. It’s also very expensive so they can only afford one room. Two beds at least though. “Hey Link welcome back to the world of the sober. How you feeling?” “Like I’ve been hit by a tuck… twice.” “Sounds about right. Hangovers are a delight. You probably need to pee real bad right about now so why don’t you go do that.’ “I’ll probably pee the bed if I don’t. I’m not even sure that would be the most embarrassing thing I’ve done today.” Link sighs and heaves himself out of bed stumbling to the bathroom. Emptying his bladder helps a little and splashing some cold water on his face helps some too. He walks back to his bed. Rhett has placed a bottle of water and some ibuprofen on his bedside table. “You should take those and drink the water that will help,” Rhett said. “We should also get some food in you. You haven’t eaten all day have you?” Besides a few halfhearted bites of the pancakes at breakfast Link realized he hadn’t had anything but caffeine and alcohol all day. No wonder he’d gotten drunk so fast. “Thanks. What time is it anyway?” “It’s half past five,” “Really? Rhett I’m sorry look like I’m the one who ruined our day not you.” “Don’t worry about it. I think I need to learn to go with the flow more too. I thought we could stay in order room service maybe watch some lame Christmas movie?” “Sounds good to me.”

Link was awakened by the sound of someone knocking at their door. “Don’t worry about that Link I’ll get it,” Rhett said. His blurry figure rushing past Link. “Mmm kay,” he mumbled. He sat up in bed yawning and stretching out his arms. His hands fumbled around the unfamiliar space to find his glasses. He put them on to see Rhett wheeling a cart in between the beds. “Good morning. I took the liberty of ordering breakfast in bed for us. I hope you don’t mind.” “No that sounds good.” “There’s fresh scones with clotted cream and a variety of jams, some fresh fruit ham and cheese quiche and of of course coffee. I got some fresh squeezed OJ for you to since you don’t usually drink coffee.” “Wow Rhett that’s quite the spread. Are you sure we can afford that?” Link asked this hotel was very high end this must have cost a fortune. “Don’t sweat it mon aime consider this an early Christmas present.” Damn Link thinks were they supposed to get each other gifts? Link just thought with the trip they would just forget about it. He’d have to find a way to buy something today without Rhett noticing. “You wanna hear what we’re doing today,” Rhett asked. As he handed a plate to Link and took one himself and began to give himself generous portions of everything on the tray. “Yeah sure.” “ First up is making and decorating gingerbread houses. Then we have to walk through the Christmas market. “What’s a Christmas market?” “So every year these Christmas markets pop up around the city. They have all kinds of vendors selling all kinds of decorations gifts baked goods and street food everything you can think of man they got it.” “Sounds interesting.” What a stroke of good luck. Surely he would be able to find an opportunity to buy something for Rhett there. “Yeah and this one is right close to the Eiffel Tower they have an outdoor skating rink there too.” “I’ve never been skating before,” Link said. “Me neither being a California boy and all. I thought it would be fun.”

It had been a fun day, a perfect day really until it wasn’t. Rhett had lead them to this cooking school not to far from the hotel. Even though neither of them had much experience in the kitchen they worked pretty well together. Even when the bickered over the decoration of their house it was all good natured and if Link got startled every time Rhett invaded his space so what? The afternoon they spent wandering through the crowded Christmas market taking in all the sights and sounds. Who’s too say if the walked a little closer than necessary hands and shoulders brushing against each other sending little shocks of electricity through Link’s body. They had some mouthwatering meat pies,tourtiere, at a street vendor eating them as they walked. As the sun set them came to the outdoor skating rink and saw the Eiffel Tower all lit up in the distance behind it. Skating was decidedly an absolute disaster. Link couldn’t keep his balance at all. He ending up grabbing for Rhett, who was somewhat steadier, and just ended up dragging them both down. And if Link reveled in the feel of their bodies tangling together what was so wrong about that? Also it was cold neither of them was dressed for that. Link teased Rhett for not bringing his fur coat. They laughed. It was like an inside joke with them now. It even began to snow big fat flakes drifting down from the sky. Once both of them had enough of fumbling around on the ice Link left Rhett sitting on a bench. He was supposed to be getting hot chocolate for them. What he was really doing was trying to find a gift for Rhett. He ended up buying him a scarf earmuffs and mittens to go with his coat and some fancy coffee with 24 carat gold flakes in it. Rhett would love that. Things started to go downhill at the hot chocolate stand. The woman serving him spoke to him in english which was far better than Link’s pitiful attempts at french. “You and your husband … you are having good time in Paris yes? It is the city of amour they say.” “Oh he’s not… we’re not married. We’re just friends,” Link answered shaking his head emphatically to try and get his point across. “Sorry my mistake. Here’s your chocolate.” Link thanked her and left. A funny feeling coming over him. Why did someone calling Rhett his husband have this effect on him? He was silent as he sat down next to Rhett and handed him his hot chocolate. When he finished he just sat there holding his empty cup not wanting to look at Rhett. Feeling overwhelmed but not sure why. “Something wrong Link?” Rhett asked. “Why are we here Rhett?” “Are you tired? We can go back now if you want.” “No like why are we here in Paris?” “I’m not sure what this is about,” Rhett said clearly confused. “Are you in love with me Rhett?” “What? Why would you say that?” “Oh I don’t know we’re here in one of the most romantic cities in the world. At Christmas. Or maybe it cause you didn’t correct Emile yesterday when she thought we were husbands.” “I didn’t think you would remember that.” “Well I do,” “Look I just didn’t think it was that important. It’s not like we were ever gonna see her again.” “Forget I asked let’s just go back to the hotel.” Link doesn’t know why he even asked those things. He hadn’t even known he was thinking them. Rhettt tip toed around him for the rest of the evening. Link pretended to be tired just so he could have some space to process everything. Rhett stayed up for awhile quietly watching TV. Eventually he switched if off and went to bed. “Link? Link you awake?” Link didn’t feel like talking so he stayed silent. “I know I avoided answering the question before. But I do Link. Love you that is. That’s why we’re here. I was going to tell you tomorrow but maybe I won’t now.” So that’s why Link was here at 3a.m on Christmas morning wandering the streets of Paris alone. Because he’d freaked out after Rhett’s confession and slipped away when Rhett fell asleep. What the crap was he supposed to think about that. He’d never dated anyone besides Vanessa. If going on two dates and getting dumped for a robot even counted as dating. And even that had been Rhett’s idea. He was always the one pushing Link to try things he never would have on his own. He wasn’t even sure he was capable of falling in love. It seemed like such an intangible concept to Link. How would you even know? Emotions were just so confusing. A sudden wave of weariness washed over Link. If he had to walk one more step he’d collapse for sure. He glanced around the deserted street there was nowhere to sit except the ground. So he slumped against the cold brick wall putting his head between his knees. He was shivering now uncontrollably but not from the cold. Then a heavy weight was draped over his shoulders. He looked up to find Rhett crouched beside him. “I guess you weren’t asleep,” Rhett said. A slight smile on his lips. The weight on his shoulders was that stupid fur coat. “Wait… what?… how did you even find me?” Link stuttered. Rhett waved his phone around. “Got your location on my phone remember?” Damn it Link had forgotten all about that. “Look I didn’t come here to push myself on you or anything. I just got worried when I woke up and you were gone. Looks like I was right to worry cause here you are crying alone and cold on the ground.” He was crying? Link’s hand wiped at his eyes confirming he was indeed crying. “I’m just…so…I’m so confused Rhett. How long?” Link was finding it difficult to speak. His voice was hoarse and his throat felt like it was closing up. Rhett sat down next to him though Link noted not close enough to be touching. “I’m not sure Link. I think I knew from the moment we met that you would be special to me. When it became something more than friendship I can’t say exactly. You sorta sneaked up on me.” There was that timid smile again. Rhett was afraid Link realized. Being vulnerable wasn’t easy for him either. “So what happens now?” he asked. “That’s up to you Link. We can pretend this never happened or we can explore this…us if you want to.” He gestured to himself and Link. “Or you can leave. I’ll understand if this is all too much for you,” He said. He tried to keep his voice even but Link heard the break in it when he said that last option. “I don’t think I can go back to how we were before Rhett. Not with you so close. I’ll always be thinking of the way you smell or the feel of your hand on my back. And how could I forget your body underneath mine solid and yet soft at the same time?” Rhett just stared at him wide eyed mouth open. Link laughed. “You’ve been giving me that look ever since we got here.” “Well you keep surprising me.” “Here’s another one then.” Link leaned over and kissed Rhett. It was a short closed mouth kiss over before it really began. Rhett was blushing when it was over though. “Really Link your sure?” Link kissed him again in reply. Rhett was ready this time putting his hand to Link’s face gently keeping him there. Only to break the kiss seconds later. “Merry Christmas Link.” “Merry Christmas Rhett.”