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isuckatwritingsobenice · 1 month

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Thinking about…

Alastor and Bill Cipher after the same s/o (headcannons)

Hazbin Masterlist // Disney Masterlist // Navigation

Warnings: Obsessive behavior! Alastor being sadistic, Bill being a bit weird because duh, wrote this with Human form Bill Cipher in mind, mentions of death

A/N: I really like this dynamic, even though it’s kind of crazy and a lose lose situation for the reader, but it’s still interesting to write about. I hope you all enjoy!!

Alastor

• Alastor isn’t just charming; he’s obsessed with making you see him as the ultimate catch. He meticulously plans every interaction, ensuring that you are always impressed and feel valued. Every compliment and gesture is calculated to win your heart.

“Why there’s that smile I love to see my dear! Ever the beauty!”

Alastor can’t stand the thought of you being attracted to anyone else, especially Bill. He tries to mask his jealousy with his usual grace and horribly timed jokes, but it’s evident in the subtle digs he takes at Bill whenever you mention him.

When Alastor is alone with you he’s not above grand, romantic gestures. Picture him serenading you with an old-fashioned love song or setting up a beautiful, intimate dinner where he pours out his feelings and tries to convince you that he’s the best choice for a partner and way better than bill in all aspects of the word.

Alastor’s affection for you is deeply strategic. He genuinely cares, but he’s also careful in how he shows it. He’ll often try to subtly make you see how a relationship with him would be beneficial, not just for personal pleasure but for gaining power and influence. He’s a very strong man and his image is important, what’s not to want about him?

“Don’t you love this view dear? We could be here all the time, if you wished.”

Alastor envisions a future where you are by his side, helping him dominate Hell. His feelings are not just about the present but about creating a powerful, enduring relationship. He dreams of ruling Hell together, and he’s willing to go to great lengths to make that vision a reality.

But not all things with Alastor are good, you know how much he HATESSSS modern technology and well, it’s how the world runs now. this is something Bill definitely used against him

“Don’t get intimated by a big screen deer man!”

Though he hates how Bills joke makes you laugh, his smile tightens nonetheless

Alastor will often put doubts into your mind about Bill. He is partially right, so it does make you wonder…

“What if he were to suddenly get tired of you? My dear, he’s traveled galaxies and destroyed universes. You wouldn’t want to be subject to that would you?”

or maybe something like,

“That little shape is no better than a toddler. He can’t even take proper care of his toys, breaking them when he gets bored. How pitiful.”

Bill Cipher

Bill is intensely infatuated with you. His feelings might come across as chaotic and erratic, per usual, but underneath, he’s deeply drawn to your spirit and individuality. He finds your uniqueness thrilling and wants to be the one to make your life as unpredictable and exciting as possible.

“ Wanna see this guy dance with his eyes hanging out of his sockets? Gotta tell ya’ you’ll never see anything like it ever!”

Bill’s way of showing affection is through wild and flirtatious chaos. He might sweep you into a whirlwind of bizarre, fantastical experiences, always with an underlying flirtation that makes it clear he’s very interested in you.

Bill knows how to push Alastor’s buttons. He often uses his chaotic antics to draw your attention away from Alastor, playfully teasing him and making a show of his own appeal. For Bill, it’s not just about romance; it’s about proving he’s the more exciting option, you’ll never be bored of him!

Despite his chaotic nature, Bill genuinely wants a deep connection with you, even if he does have a weird way of being about it. He’s drawn to your complexity and wants to show you that his brand of chaos can be both thrilling and deeply meaningful. He might surprise you with moments of surprising sincerity.

Bill is not afraid to take big risks to win you over. He’s willing to gamble with the very fabric of reality just to create memorable moments. His love is unpredictable and intense, and he hopes you will find that thrilling rather than overwhelming.

Bill is the type of guy to take you to a different reality for a date, wanna go watch marshans fight? no problem! upset about something? let’s go to this dimension where you can blow anything up!

He’s definitely got jokes though, and he’s good at them too

“Hey furry, why don’t you cut that loose part of your hair? OH wait, it’s your EARS!”

Bill is no fool though, he sees EVERYTHING, so it’s really difficult to hide things from him, which means being with him also means you losing your privacy.

“He’s a sociopath dove, you can’t really believe that radio freak actually likes you right?”

He isn’t wrong, Alastor has proven multiple times he keeps people around because he needs them for something, and Bill loves this

“What if you don’t satisfy him? What if he decides you’re not worth being with?”

or maybe he’ll say

“ You never know dove, what if he’s just after your soul? Maybe he likes the fact you put up a good fight, eh?”

Both demons have their crazies to them. Picking Alastor means Bill might destroy your dimension and maybe rearrange his molecules. But picking Bill means watching Alastor rip hell to shreds at your expense, hurting anyone and everyone to get you, maybe even threatening whoever you love.

Dating Alastor means you can kind of live a normal-ish life

Dating Bill means you keep your dimension

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anantaru · 1 year

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— sleepy hsr boys headcanons

including jing yuan, blade, luocha, welt, dan heng, sampo, gepard x gn! reader

꒰ genre ꒱ — fluff, sleepy boys

sleepy! jing yuan who rubs his reddened eyes while on the literal brink of passing out on his office desk— a couple minutes of resting surely wouldn‘t hurt. subsequently, he catches a glimpse of your frame the split second you saunter into his work space as he voicelessly makes room for you to sit on his lap. he‘s clingy— reminding you of a little puppy, you almost didn‘t recognize the general and his newfound antics as you comfortably cradle him into your embrace. it‘s a deep sigh from jing yuan which follows next and had locked you in a fatigued square as you both closed your eyes for what seemed like just a minute, only one— which later, developed into a heavy three hours and counting.

sleepy! blade finding hushed solace against your shoulder while he dozes off into a tranquil sleep. at first, he was attempting to fight it, the need for a nap, but taking all his doings into consideration it was only a matter of time before his own body would catch on to him and give up. but blade— he adores how understanding you are, wholly, one of the many traits of yours he fell in love with as he nudges himself closer to you, one hand intertwined with your own as you lean your head against his.

sleepy! luocha who likes when you‘re as close as possible against him, in his own pair of thinking he finds the natural body wamrth you emit comforting and soul soothing. in one way or another was he fearful that he might appear too holding and glutinous to your own liking. fun fact— the blonde gets especially clingy during that time as well, although he starts it off a silver like awkward, honestly clueless on how to demonstrate it without being too much, he afterwards bundles enough courage to let himself loose and fully embrace his current state with you.

sleepy! welt who desperately tries to seem like he isn‘t actually tired and that it‘s you who‘s mistaking it as clearing fatigue. quite hilarious when he tries to argue with you while his eyes were clearly on their last straw, inch by inch closing off. you urge him to close his eyes for a minute and after a couple instances of playful, sweet bickering he agrees but says that it‘s, quote on quote, “only for a minute” and then he‘ll be back to his usual self, just you wait. well— you might‘ve guessed on how it ended because welt will then fall asleep immediately. he‘s snoring a little too but it only adds a certain charm onto him.

sleepy! dan heng who secretly adores when you play and fondle with his hair while he‘s laying all amply against your chest. it might be your pacifying heart-beat that throws him into a complete stupor of snugly dreams and memories about you— it didn‘t matter if it‘s the future with you he envisions or past fun activities you had participated in a few weeks ago. dan heng can‘t possibly explain how delighted and thankful he was to you, and for accepting him entirely, no ifs and buts, no reminiscing about his darkened past, it‘s the “now” that mattered to you.

sleepy! sampo who assures you he doesn‘t require for his eyes to be closed in order for him to rest. really, it‘s a given, he sleeps with his eyes open, you should believe him, he urges. but then— obviously, his eyes will turn low lidded until wholly closed while you can listen to the small, "only a little." or "just a second and then i‘ll open my eyes again." while he‘s, step by step, lulling himself into his sleep, drawing you so close to his body that you were practically crushed against his neck and lacking breathing room.

sleepy! gepard who only wants to sleep if you‘re napping too, no quarreling required, it‘s either the both of you or none. because frankly, he thinks it‘s embarrassing or disrespectful if he was to sleep right now even though the both of you actually met up to do some fun activities or take a walk around belobog as it was one of his rare off days where he had some time to spare. but the man truly forgot how precious sleep can be and who were you to force him out of his cushiony bed? if you were attempting to be honest for just a little too, there really wasn‘t anything better than lazying around all day with your soulmate.

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edensreality · 26 days

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“DR SELVES” and “S/O’s”

Good morning, good afternoon, or good evening, dear dimension travelers! Today, I'm going to talk about a topic that I've been wanting to address for some time—something that triggers me in the shifting community.

I'd really like to know why SO MANY of you refer to yourselves as 'DR self'? What is that? Is it you? Why are you referring to yourself as if you were a character in a movie or series?

Please GET it into your head that you exist in MULTIPLE universes, not just this one. The dimension you choose to reside in and travel to is not fiction; it’s YOUR life, a real experience that you will live. Stop referring to yourself as ‘DR self’—it doesn’t even make sense. You don’t refer to yourself in this dimension as ‘Me from this universe,’ in a normal conversation, you just say ‘Me,’ so use that when referring to yourself in an alternate universe because it’s still you!

You are going to live that life—it's not just a silly little scenario you're imagining. Everything you envision about your desired universe is REAL and will happen or has already happened because you have lived it or will live it. It's not a movie, it's not fiction, it's YOUR life.

The second topic is completely separate from the first. Well, I want to know why I see so many comments here on Shiftblr about you feeling guilty for having an “s/o.” (I used quotes because I don't like the term 's/o'; I prefer saying boyfriend or just 'my man,' but that's just my personal preference. 😭)

I usually see this issue more often with people who travel to a dimension where their boyfriend/girlfriend/partner is a real person, like a celebrity. Why do you feel guilty? I don't see anything to feel guilty about.

As we all know, the dimension you're going to is COMPLETELY different from this one, entirely different. And in that dimension you're travelling to, you and your partner or future partner are meant to be. That's why they are your partner. You didn't choose your “s/o”; the universe brought THEM to YOU and chose that in another reality, you are meant to be.

That's why you shouldn't feel guilty for having an “s/o” who is a celebrity, someone you know, or even a character! Because in a distant universe, you were made for each other. Thank the universe for that! The universe is your best friend!

“Thank you, Universe!” We all say in unison.

You are the most powerful person in the universe, solely because you can shift realities, galaxies, universes, and dimensions to be what you want, have the life you desire, and most importantly, BE who you truly are.

@edensreality

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ramblingthoughtsofayoungadult · 10 months

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Unpredictable-Limoreau x black!fem!reader fic

A/N: I was inspired a lot by the Bama Rush documentary and couldn't get the idea of a sorority girl in GOD U out of my head. Let me know if you want a part 2.

Warnings: some swearing

Words: 5.2k

Series Masterlist

Future probability cognition, the ability to see potential future outcomes, was usually a nice power to have. At 7, I knew my parents were going to get divorced before either of them considered filing. At 9, I knew my mother would focus all her energy on the agency. At 12, I knew that my older brother would take a head of surgery job in Buenos Aires, escaping the chaos at home. Despite this history, nothing could have prepared me for my second year at Godolkin.

The first day back on campus was uneventful: I survived a grueling early morning Pilates class that I envisioned would put me in Sydney’s, the Si Chi president, good graces and, later in the afternoon, I settled an argument between two Si Chi juniors by predicting that brunch would be the most successful rush event.

Being (one of) the first black high-ranking members of Si Chi could be a full-time job.

As I was re-reading the chapters for Brink’s class, my V-Phone buzzed with a text from Leah, one of the seniors in the sorority.

L: Do you know Emma?

I quickly typed back: Which one? Wallace or the girl who got the botched nj in SK?

L: Neither. Short girl with curly blonde hair. She’s here 4 u.

The yelp that left my mouth would have been embarrassing if anyone else was in the house study room. Quickly, I tucked my book under my arm and ran into the ivory and wood-paneled foyer complete with Tiffany crystal chandelier and faint instrumental piano music playing through the Bluetooth speakers. At the door, Leah’s arms were crossed over her lavender babydoll dress as she smiled fakely at Emma, who looked more apprehensive than usual.

“Emma, hi, I thought I told you to text me when you got here!” I greeted as I approached the two.

Emma’s expression relaxed when her blue eyes landed on me. “Sorry, I got distracted and then I got lost trying to find you.”

I glanced at Leah, who shot me a questioning look. “Thanks, Leah, I can take it from here.”

Leah shrugged, turned, and teleported into thin air. Emma’s eyes widened again as she stepped further into the house and I closed the door behind her.

“Sorry about Leah; she’s cagier than usual because she couldn’t get a refill on her favorites,” I explained.

“It’s fine, I’m just glad you aren’t like that,” Emma admitted.

I paused to finally hug her and she nearly crushed me as she wound her arms around my middle. It felt like forever since I had seen Emma, even though it was at my dad’s annual 4th of July barbecue. When I pulled away, Emma eyed the book in my hand.

“You’re reading before school starts. Nerd,” she teased.

I playfully pushed her shoulder. “We’re in college, we have to take school way more seriously now. Besides, a requirement for Si Chi is at least a 3.8.”

Emma tapped her chin. “Let me guess, you have a 4.0.”

I smiled and tugged her further into the house. Of course, I had to give her a tour of the house and introduce her to the girls we passed. When we finally got to my room, Emma collapsed on top of my pastel blue comforter, dropping her bag on the matching rug.

“I know Si Chi is a top house, but you basically live in Barbie’s Dream House,” Emma beamed. “How do I get in? What do I have to do? I will do literally anything or anyone.”

I rolled my eyes and set my book on my desk. “I’m glad you like the place but, you haven’t even met your roommate yet. What’s her name again?”

Emma pushed herself up on her elbows with a huff. “Marie Moreau. I tried to find her on social media, but she doesn’t have any: No X, no TikTok, not even an obligatory Facebook.”

Social media presence was basically a requirement at GOD U these days so it was a bold move for someone to show up without any. It could mean Marie was hardcore about her studies or…

“She might have strict parents,” I pointed out, sitting next to Emma.

Emma raised an eyebrow. “They better not be weird, cult-y parents. I guess that would be my luck too: have a psycho roommate my freshman year.”

“Hey, no one could have had it worse than me: a slob who always had boys over and threatened to gut me in my sleep,” I argued.

“But, you saw all of that coming,” Emma argued.

I shook my head. “Only the part where she stood over my bed with a knife in hand.” I sighed and pressed my hands into the covers. “I’m so glad I don’t have to deal with that ever again.”

“Really, because some of these girls are giving unhinged,” Emma replied.

“The nice thing is I either pick up on the signs or ‘see’ their breaking point,” I explained.

Emma nodded and pushed herself off my bed to start exploring my room. As she started messing with my checkered Moschino teddy bear figurine, my phone buzzed on my desk. When I grabbed it, I saw it was a video call from Cate.

“Hi, what’s up?” I greeted, holding the phone at the most flattering angle.

“I’m trying to entertain myself while Luke preps for training,” Cate admitted.

“What, you’re not totally entertained by your star boyfriend?” I teased.

Cate rolled her eyes. “No, I can’t wait for this to be over. You’re coming, right?”

I shook my head. “Sorry, we have a rush event at the same time, including a choreographed dance.”

“Ooh, did you choreograph it?” Cate asked.

“I might have helped a little.”

“Well, I’m pissed I’ll miss it but make sure to have someone send me all the cute videos and pictures,” Cate requested.

“Sure.”

There was some yelling in the background and Cate rolled her eyes.

“I have to go but we’ll talk later.”

“Bye!”

When I hung up, Emma was staring at me with her mouth gaping, the teddy figurine dangerously close to slipping from her grasp and onto the hardwood floor. I crossed the room as quickly as I could and carefully placed the figurine back on my dresser.

“Emma, I love you but if you break anything, I will lose it,” I warned.

“You know Cate Dunlap?” Emma asked slowly.

“Oh, yeah, she’s my peer mentor. Dean Shetty paired us up last year since our powers are similar,” I answered.

“So, you’ve met Luke Riordan? Like, you’ve been in his presence?”

“Yes,” I answered slowly.

“And you didn’t faint or throw up from his glory?”

“Emma, he’s a regular person. His powers are insane but he is also human, just like us.”

“No, I’m a regular person. Luke Riordan is, like, a demigod or something. Is he better looking in person?”

I hesitated and busied myself with grabbing my rush outfit from my closet and setting it on my bed. Then, I stared at my shoes, feeling Emma’s eyes bored into the back of my head. I closed my eyes and focused on the event tonight, the potential sounds and people. Seconds later, I got a decent image of my Si Chi sisters and I dancing in front of the house, surrounded by freshmen girls in Princess Polly and House of CB. I focused all my energy on looking at our feet and tried not to groan when I saw red high-top Converse.

“Every time,” I muttered as I opened my eyes.

Two more years, just two more years of going along and I would reap the benefits: a strong ranking, a decent contract, and my pick of the most eligible supes. I just had to keep playing the game.

I grabbed my platform red Converses and set them in front of my bed, sheepishly turning to Emma. “Yes, Emma.”

She squealed. “I knew it!”

I laughed at her joy as she bounced in her Vans. “Go to the training today and see for yourself.”

Emma’s expression deflated slightly as she walked closer to me. “I wish you could come, you could introduce us!”

“There will be a next time,” I stated.

“Promise?” She held up her pinky and eyed me as I slowly wrapped my manicured one around hers. She opened her mouth but was cut off by an alarm going off on her phone. “Shit, I have to go film a video!”

“You’re still doing Little Cricket?” I asked.

Emma shushed me loudly and her eyes filled with panic. “Not so loud and definitely not in this house!”

The girls probably already know all about it, I thought.

I flipped my waist-length box braids over my shoulder and laughed as she rushed towards the door. “You don’t know where you’re going, let me walk you out!”

She paused for a split second and gave me some time to catch up to her. However, I led her through the quickest route back to the front door and she gave me a quick hug before she took off. I laughed as I closed the door behind her.

“Some things never change,” I mused.

When I got back up to my room, I realized she left her backpack and groaned. She would have to learn to be more responsible if she was going to survive more than a week here. So, I grabbed my purse and her backpack before traipsing the campus. Fortunately, Emma had texted me her dorm information before she got on campus.

“In case of an emergency,” she’d insisted.

The freshman dorms were not as bad as I remembered them but I cringed at a few musty speedster jocks I crossed in the hallway. A brief premonition helped me duck to avoid an ice user’s power going out of control when I finally made it to Emma’s door. First, I rapped on the door three times.

“Emma, it’s me, you really have to keep a better eye on your stuff!” I called.

After a few seconds of no answer, I knocked again.

“Seriously? I can’t always be looking after you,” I teased.

Finally, the door swung open, revealing a pretty black girl with big brown eyes and long brown dreads that were pulled partly away from her face. Her eyes widened at me and I smiled.

“Sorry, I’m looking for Emma, she left her bag in my----”

Emma cut me off, appearing next to the girl, “I was wondering where that went, thanks!” She grabbed the bag from me.

“Oh, uh, come in,” the girl said, stepping aside.

I nodded and wandered further into their dorm. It was small, like most freshman dorms, but Emma’s side offered pops of color and coziness. The other side was more basic, probably because the girl just moved in.

“Marie, this is Y/N, my best friend, Y/N, Marie,” Emma introduced as she plopped onto her bed.

I turned to Marie and extended a hand. “Nice to meet you.”

She hesitated slightly before shaking my hand. “You too.”

“Don’t worry, Marie, you’ll get used to her hotness,” Emma advised.

My cheeks warmed as I whirled around to my friend. “Emma!”

“It’s true!”

The embarrassment floated in the pit of my stomach as I faced Marie, who looked somewhere between surprised and amused. “Sorry about her, she speaks without thinking.”

“It’s okay. How do you two know each other?” Marie asked.

“Her mom represents me,” Emma answered.

“Oh.”

“She’s the one who helped encourage me to make a YouTube channel and is helping me get into more commercials until my big break,” Emma continued.

I sighed as I sat in Emma’s desk chair. “We’ve known each other since I was four and she was three.”

“Do you want to be an actor too?” Marie asked.

I shook my head. “I tried it when I was little but it wasn’t for me.”

Emma’s eyes lit up and she sat up on her bed. “You should have seen her, she was so cute! She was that toddler in that one diaper commercial----”

“Emma,” I softly begged.

Marie laughed. “Now, I’m curious.”

“Please don’t look it up, it’s not worth it anyway,” I insisted.

Marie shrugged and sat on her bed. “My curiosity might get the best of me.”

“Why did you have to mention that stupid commercial?” I whined at Emma, who laughed at my pain. “Anyway, what’s your major?”

“Crimefighting,” Marie answered.

I straightened up. “Me too.”

“So, you’ve had classes with Brink? How is he? What’s he like?” Marie rambled.

“Well, he’s really tough on first years and makes his tests almost impossible to pass,” I admitted.

“Really?” Marie asked.

“But, I can help you if you want; I did pretty well last year,” I offered.

As soon as the words left my mouth, I questioned where they came from. Marie was a complete stranger, yet she was one of the easiest people to talk to. Normally, I stumbled over my words in front of new people, and this was…new.

“That would be great, thanks,” Marie replied.

Emma leaned forward. “Y/N, you are way too modest. She was in the top ten of the first years last year and she has a peer mentor and meets with Brink on a regular basis.”

Marie snapped her attention to me. “Wait, what?”

I shook my head. “She makes it sound more impressive than it is.”

“No, I’m not; she hangs out with the Top Five all the time.”

“Top Five?” Marie asked.

Emma and I turned to her, stunned.

“You don’t know what the Top Five are?” Emma asked slowly.

Marie shook her head, growing tenser the longer we looked at her.

“Godolkin ranks all the students based on their Q score, which is basically the strength of their powers, academics, and social media engagement. The Top One Hundred are the only ones published every day,” I explained.

“And the Top Five are the only ones everyone really cares about since they’re the ones most likely to make it into the Seven,” Emma added. “It’s on the GOD U app.”

“I don’t have a phone,” Marie admitted.

Emma balked at her. “How have you gone this far in life without a phone?”

Marie shrugged. “My parents wouldn’t let me have one.”

“What about emergencies?” I asked.

“Someone else always has one,” Marie countered.

Something was off about her statement and I knew that if I focused on it long enough, I would get a premonition about her. However, I decided that it would be rude to do that in conversation and tabled it for later.

“You’ll get through it,” I said.

“So, what ranking are you, Y/N?” Marie asked.

“Last I checked, I was number twenty,” I recalled.

Marie and Emma’s eyes widened at me, and I shrunk a little under their gaze. It really was not that impressive considering how intense the nineteen other people above me were.

“That’s amazing!” Emma cheered, leaping off her bed and hugging me.

“How did that happen?” Marie asked gently.

When Emma pulled away, I replied, “Well, right before summer break, I had a premonition about a case Brink had the class working on all year.”

“You solved a crime?” Marie concluded.

“I just helped with a tip,” I insisted.

“Please, Y/N, don’t act like you haven’t solved cases before,” Emma stated.

I narrowed my eyes at her and Emma smirked in reply. Marie held up her hands and shook her head.

“Wait, as in plural?”

“It’s really not a big deal. With all the forensics, psychology, and ethics classes you’ll take, you’ll be solving them too.”

Marie looked unconvinced but did not push it. “So, what’s your ability? I’m sorry if that’s rude to ask.”

“No, it’s fine. Future probability cognition, I can see potential outcomes for the future,” I explained.

“That’s amazing,” Marie complimented.

“Eh, a lot of times it means I get blurry images in my head but it’s helpful sometimes. What about you?”

“Blood manipulation.”

“Whoa, no offense, but that is such a supervillain power,” Emma thought outloud.

“Emma!”

“I said ‘no offense’!”

Marie laughed. “It’s okay, I get why people would think that.”

“Can you give us a demonstration?” Emma asked.

Marie nodded and grabbed a switchblade from her cargo pants’ pocket. In a graceful motion, she cut one of her palms and held it out in front of her. Seconds later, a circle of blood floated in the air like water, swirling each way. Marie smiled at our expressions and the blood slowly flowed back in her palm and the mark healed.

“That was awesome!” Emma cheered.

“I think Brink will like you,” I added.

“Thanks. I think it’s your turn, Y/N,” Marie said.

I hesitated. “Well, mine is definitely not as impressive as yours and I can’t promise I’ll see anything…positive.”

“That’s okay,” Marie insisted.

“You can use me as a demonstration,” Emma offered.

I turned to her and closed my eyes. My mind wandered to images of her face and the sound of her laugh. Eventually, I saw an image of her rolling around her dorm bed with some guy. Then, all of a sudden, she was small and--- “AAAH!” I jumped from my seat, both underclassmen looking at me confused.

“Is it that bad?” Emma asked.

My eyes looked everywhere but my best friend and my hands unconsciously flexed. “Whatever you do, do not bring a guy here in the future.”

“You don’t want me to get laid?”

“I don’t think you would want to experience what I just saw.” I shivered at the thought.

“Have your powers made you respond like that before?” Marie asked.

I nodded. “It’s rare, though, and I have help to get a handle on it.”

Slowly, I sat down and focused on the orange circle rug on the floor. Suddenly, I wished Cate was there to wipe that premonition from my memory. My stomach churned and I swallowed thickly.

“Oh, Marie, you have to come to the training with me today,” Emma announced.

“What training?”

“The Top Five have public training at the beginning of every year. This year, Luke Riordan is up first,” Emma explained with a grin.

“Luke’s a big deal?” Marie asked.

“Hell yeah, he’s number one!” Emma chastised.

Marie turned to me. “Are you going?”

I looked up at her and wondered if she seemed kind of hopeful. “No, I have to do rush tonight.”

“On top of everything else, she is also the secretary of Si Chi, the top sorority on campus,” Emma bragged.

“Wow, are you always this busy?” Marie asked.

“Not always. Things calm down once rush is over.” My phone beeped in my bag and I grabbed it. “Speaking of which, I have to run and get ready.”

“But you already look nice,” Marie commented.

“Thanks, but I need to be up to Si Chi standards. Have fun at the training and Emma, please try not to act up too much.”

“I can’t control what will happen once his clothes burn off.”

“What?” I shook my head. “I’ll see you around.”

The next day, I was shocked awake by a series of texts from Emma.

E: Emergency, pls come 2 my dorm.

E: Srsly, Marie needs ur help.

Immediately, I wondered my Marie would need my help. When I reached out to Emma last night, she was busy gushing over Luke and never mentioned any issues. Also, I didn’t see any posts about her on social media which calmed my nerves.

After texting her I would be there soon, I slowly pushed myself to sit up in my head and pushed my silk sleep mask up over my scarf. Then, I meditated for a few minutes, breathing through all the chaotic thoughts and scenarios that included strangers and people that I knew. Just when my temples began to throb, I stopped and made my way into the en-suite bathroom.

About thirty minutes later, Emma shoved her dorm room open and pulled me in. She was wearing a gray GOD U t shirt and matching shorts, her curly stuck up in random places.

“Where the hell have you been?” she whispered.

“I got here as soon as I could,” I defended. “What’s going on?”

Marie stood from her desk, a deep frown on her face, and made her way towards us. “I’m not in any Crimefighting classes; it’s all performing arts!”

I cocked my head to the side. “That’s weird. Can I see your schedule?”

“It’s on my phone.” Emma handed it to me and I started scrolling through Marie’s schedule.

“Did you register for any performing arts classes?” I asked.

“No, I registered for all the first-year Crimefighting classes,” Marie insisted.

The frustration was thick in her voice and I wondered what was keeping her from punching a hole in the wall.

“Is there anything I can do?” Marie asked.

“Sorry, I don’t know. I’ve never heard of this happening.” I paused for a moment and smiled. “But I might be able to help. I have a meeting with Brink today and if you come with me, I could introduce you and we could get this all figured out.”

“Really? Do you know how it will go?”

“Let me try.”

I closed my eyes and focused on Brink, the Crimefighting building, and Marie. The images were as blurry as a Monet up close and all the audio was muffled as if everyone was speaking underwater. When I opened my eyes, I shook my head at Marie.

“Looks like it’s up to fate,” I commented.

Marie deflated and I did not know whether to comfort her or not.

“I’m sending good vibes your way,” Emma offered.

“Thanks, we’ll need it,” Marie replied.

As much as I wanted to push back, I did not like not knowing how this would turn out. My heart drummed in my ears later that day as we walked to the Lamplighter building. At the very least, the sun was beaming on everything, making Godolkin look shinier than usual. It was the perfect day for the white cherry-printed sundress and denim jacket I wore with platform white sandals. My braids flowed freely around me under the cool breeze.

When we walked into the building, I let out the breath I did not know I was holding in.

“You okay?” Marie asked.

“Yeah, why?” I replied.

“Your heart rate picked up,” she observed.

I paused and looked at her. “You can hear my heartbeat?”

She nodded. “Sorry, I know that’s kind of weird.” “Nothing’s weird at this school but, that’s good to know,” I assured.

I made a mental note to be more intentional in meditation as I led Marie to Brink’s office. The Lamplighter building was practically empty since most students were sleeping off hangovers. However, Jordan Li wasn’t most students and was at their usual post, the desk outside of Brink’s office, eyes focused on their laptop. They were in their feminine form, hair slicked back in a low ponytail.

A small smile etched its way on my glossed lips at the sight and I turned to Marie, whose eyes widened at Jordan.

“Let me do the talking,” I whispered.

“Sounds good,” she answered, nodding.

As soon as we got in front of Jordan’s desk, I waved my hand in front of their face to no avail. With no choice, I grinned as I slammed my hands on the desk and called their name. Immediately, Jordan jumped in their seat, yanking their earbuds out as they exclaimed an expletive.

I laughed as they rolled their eyes at me.

“Seriously, freshie?” Jordan commented.

“You can’t call me that anymore, I’m a sophomore,” I sang.

“It doesn’t have the same ring to it,” Jordan teased.

My cheeks warmed at their words and I gripped my Longchamp tote closer to me in an attempt to get a grip on myself.

“By the way, I loved your little dance from last night,” Jordan added.

“You saw that?” I rasped.

“Rushtok is so big that no one can escape it.” Jordan glanced at their laptop. “You’re early, as usual.”

“I like to be punctual but, I also have someone who might be your new favorite freshman,” I replied.

“Impossible,” Jordan scoffed.

I nodded to Marie, who slowly moved to stand next to me. “This is Marie Moreau. Marie, this is Jordan Li, Brink’s TA.”

Jordan glanced at Marie, a smirk disappearing from their face. “Hi.”

“Hi, it’s so nice to meet you. You’re so awesome; your powers are incredible,” Marie confessed.

Jordan smirked. “I’m glad I impressed a freshman.”

Marie looked taken aback and glanced at me.

“I brought Marie with me since there’s been a mix-up. She applied for Crimefighting but she’s in all the performing arts classes. So, I was thinking that you’d be able to help,” I explained.

Jordan looked back at their laptop and started typing again. “I know, I’m the one who rejected her.”

Their words hung in the air and I could feel a lump starting to form in my throat. As smart as Jordan was, they were either unaware of how deeply their bluntness could cut or they did not care. After knowing them for a year, I began to lean toward the latter.

“What?” Marie muttered.

“Why?” I questioned.

“She has no social media presence and, even though her scores are decent, she needs a following,” Jordan rattled.

“Isn’t that a little biased? Do you know what her powers are? If you knew, I think you would be open to making an exception,” I argued gently. “Besides, she can still get a following online. With her face, it will take no time.”

As soon as the comment left my mouth, I froze. I had no idea why I said that, maybe Emma’s tendencies had rubbed off on me.

“Sorry, the decision’s final.” Jordan did not sound apologetic at all and I thought I saw them trying not to smirk again.

“You can’t do that. Let me talk to Professor Brink,” Marie requested.

“There’s no point, he leaves all admission decisions to me,” Jordan said. “You should learn from your friend. Y/N here has ten million followers across her social media and solved the Glasgow Ripper case and a twenty-year-old cold case before she got here.”

Marie whirled around to me. “You solved the Glasgow Ripper case?”

“I just gave them a tip and it was supposed to be anonymous,” I muttered.

“Nothing is anonymous with Vought,” Jordan countered. “Plus, you led them to key evidence.”

“They would have solved it…eventually,” I admitted.

Based on my original estimate, it would have taken them three years and I always felt horrible whenever they showed the victims’ families on the news. The tension in the space was thick as Jordan and Marie glared at each other. I wracked my brain for something, anything to say.

Fortunately, Brink took care of the tension when he burst out of his office, gun in hand, and shot at Jordan. Marie yelped as Jordan switched to their male form and absorbed the shot.

“Wow, every time,” Brink admired.

“If you keep it up, I’m going to run out of shirts, sir,” Jordan replied, smiling.

Brink turned to Marie and me. “Oh, Y/N, you’re here, early as always.”

“Hi, Professor Brink. How was your summer?” I asked.

“Busy. And yours?”

“Good. Um, Professor, I don’t want to take too much of your time, but this is Marie Moreau and there was a mix-up with her schedule,” I started.

Professor Brink nodded and turned to Marie. “Is that so?”

Marie quickly explained the dilemma, narrowing her eyes at Jordan but was able to stay as calm and professional as possible. I glanced at Professor Brink’s expression and while he looked pleasant, I dreaded his words.

“Well, if Jordan rejected you, that’s final. I trust their judgment,” Professor Brink affirmed. “You can serve as a hero in many ways; Crimefighting is a select group of students who show high aptitude in several areas. That does not mean anyone else is less valuable. Maybe we will see you on Dancing with the Stars one day.”

Marie’s face fell and her body tensed. I might have started crying if I was in her position but her eyes stayed dry. I gently put my hand on her shoulder.

“We’ll figure something out,” I muttered.

She did not look convinced and as I politely followed Brink into his office, I prayed that I would get some sort of helpful premonition. Then again, why did I want to help this girl? I knew her for less than twenty-four hours. Nothing was making sense.

Later that day, I practically ran a hole into my bedroom floor as I ruminated over my next steps. My meeting with Brink was unremarkable and I couldn’t stop thinking about how to get Marie into crim. She was obviously a strong hero in the works, even if Jordan didn’t see it. One way to help would be to get her into a decent house on campus since that was one of the only viable routes outside of making it into the Top 100 to get noticed on campus. However, Marie did not strike me as the sorority type.

Then again, I could help her with donors at fundraisers since they loved throwing their money to make themselves feel better. As I thought, my mind somehow circled back to Jordan. It was fun getting a rise out of them after everything last year. They were not as rude to me as they were to Marie, but they were still terrifying last year. They always had a critique for someone and had reduced numerous kids to tears before the first semester ended. Somehow, I impressed them last year and they started being nicer to me. It probably also did not hurt that I had befriended Cate.

“Ugh, it’s hopeless!” I huffed, plopping onto my bed.

Even when I tried to get premonitions, there was nothing helpful; just Jordan and Marie arguing while I attempted to settle things.

What was this year turning into?

My phone rang, jolting me from my thoughts, and I answered without looking at the caller ID. “Hello?”

“Do you have any rush shit tonight?” Cate asked.

I sat up and eyed her in the video call. “No, all the presidents and VPs are meeting tonight so we’re on our own.”

“Great, so you’re free to go out with us,” Cate concluded with a grin.

My heartbeat picked up at the thought of going out with Cate and the others. Any time I went out with them always ended in an interesting story, from the time Cate got us all out of a really embarrassing ticket to the time Andre and Luke drunkenly dueted “Never Gonna Give You Up” in a Korean karaoke bar.

“I know that face, you’re thinking too much,” Cate warned.

“Not in a bad way, in a good way. Where are we going?”

“Don’t worry, just wear something hot and meet us in the parking lot at ten.”

“Okay.”

I hung up and set the phone on my dresser. Maybe this would help me clear my head or get me out of my head. Sometimes the thoughts could be suffocating but I would get a break tonight. I closed my eyes and wondered what would happen tonight. Slowly, clear images of a dark club and the sound of a thumping bass flooded my mind. The club was crowded but I saw myself dancing with Cate and…Marie?

#gen v x reader #jordan li x reader #black!reader #marie moreau x reader #limoreau x reader

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imthebadguyyy · 3 months

Text

i can fix him, no really i can.

Pairing : charles leclerc x reader

Fandom : formula 1

Series : the tortured poets department

Synopsis : they tell say God help her when I tell em he's my man...

warnings : angst.

the jokes that he told across the bar were revolting and far too loud...

The Monaco Grand Prix had been spectacular. Charles Leclerc, the golden boy of Formula 1, had won in his home country, and the celebrations were grand. The streets of Monte Carlo were alive with excitement, and the night was still young when you found yourself at a cozy bar with Charles and your friends, including Alex and Lily.

Charles was in high spirits, the euphoria of his victory coursing through him. You couldn't help but feel proud of him, but a knot of anxiety had formed in your stomach. You brushed it off, attributing it to the intensity of the day. The bar was crowded, the laughter loud, and the drinks flowing.

You sat beside Charles, trying to engage in the celebratory mood, but the jokes he told across the bar were revolting and far too loud. You could see the discomfort in Lily’s eyes, and Alex’s attempt to diffuse the tension with his own humor only partially succeeded.

“And then there was my ex, remember her?” Charles roared with laughter, slapping the table. “She was always so organized, never made a fuss about anything. I swear, sometimes I think she had everything more together than anyone else I’ve ever known.”

The laughter that followed was forced, a thin veneer over the awkwardness. Your heart sank. Charles had a few too many drinks, and his filter was gone. The way he talked about his exes, and sometimes even you, made you feel small and insignificant. Tonight, it stung more than usual.

Lily gave you a sympathetic look, and you tried to muster a smile. Alex changed the subject to racing, trying to steer the conversation away from dangerous waters. But Charles was on a roll.

“And you, love, you’ve got your quirks too,” he said, wrapping an arm around your shoulder. His voice was louder than necessary, drawing the attention of those around you. “Remember that time you tried to cook us dinner and nearly burned the kitchen down? Classic.”

The laughter was scattered, and you felt your cheeks burn with embarrassment. You wanted to disappear, but you stayed, for Charles. The night dragged on, each joke more painful than the last, until finally, it was time to leave.

Back at the hotel, the atmosphere was heavy with the unspoken words that lingered in the air. Charles, still basking in his victory, seemed oblivious to your discomfort. He collapsed onto the bed, eyes half-closed, a contented smile on his face.

You changed into your pajamas quietly, the tension building within you. Charles didn’t notice. He didn’t kiss you goodnight or tell you he loved you. He just lay there, lost in his own world.

As you slipped into bed beside him, tears pricked at the corners of your eyes. The silence was deafening. You turned away, facing the wall, the weight of your doubts pressing down on you. Was this what love felt like? Was this the future you had envisioned with him?

Sleep was elusive, your mind racing with questions and insecurities. You felt a chasm growing between you, one that his victory and the night’s revelry couldn’t bridge. Charles had won a race, but you felt like you had lost something precious.

In the quiet darkness of the hotel room, you lay awake, wondering if Charles would ever see the pain behind your forced smiles, the hurt beneath your laughter. The night that had started with joy ended in silent despair, leaving you unsure about the road ahead.

they shake their heads, saying god help her, when i, tell em he's my man...

The living room buzzed with nostalgia and laughter as you mingled with Charles' childhood friends. Marta, Riccardo, and a few others caught up animatedly near the fireplace, while Lily and your closest girlfriends gathered near the kitchen, sharing stories and memories.

Charles slipped his arm around your waist, and you took a deep breath, trying to steady your nerves. "Hey everyone," you announced, your voice trembling slightly. "There's something we want to share."

The room quieted, and curious eyes turned towards you. You felt Charles' supportive presence beside you, which gave you a measure of reassurance.

"We're dating," Charles declared with a bright smile, his eyes searching for signs of approval or happiness.

There was a moment of stunned silence. Then, Marta and Riccardo exchanged concerned glances. Lily's expression softened with worry, but she quickly composed herself.

Without saying a word, Lily motioned for the other girls to follow her. You gathered in a nearby room, and they enveloped you in a supportive hug.

"We just want you to be careful," Lily whispered, her voice filled with concern. "You know how Charles can be sometimes."

The other girls nodded in agreement, their expressions a mixture of sympathy and caution. "We're here for you no matter what," one of them added, squeezing your hand gently.

Tears welled up in your eyes as you felt their unconditional support. These were the friends who had always been by your side, through thick and thin. Their concern was palpable, a reflection of your deep bond and shared history.

"I appreciate your concern," you managed to say, your voice trembling with emotion. "But I really care about Charles. I hope you can see that."

They nodded understandingly, their embrace tightening around you. "Just promise us you'll look out for yourself," Lily said softly.

You nodded, feeling a renewed sense of determination. Despite the doubts lingering in the back of your mind, you knew you had their support. With them standing beside you, you felt a flicker of hope that maybe, just maybe, everything would turn out alright.

Back in the living room, Charles was chatting animatedly with his friends, oblivious to the heartfelt conversation happening just a few rooms away. You took a deep breath, wiping away your tears. Whatever happened next, you knew you weren't alone.

his hand so calloused from his pistol, softly traces hearts on my face...

The day had been a disaster. Charles had been so sure of his win, so confident in his abilities. But the race had ended in bitter disappointment. You could see the frustration radiating off him as he stormed out of the pit, his face a mask of barely contained rage.

You followed him quietly, giving him space as he retreated to the trailer. He slammed the door behind him, and you hesitated before opening it slowly and stepping inside. The tension in the small space was palpable.

"Charles," you said softly, hoping to calm him down. "It's just one race. There will be more."

He whirled around, his eyes blazing. "You don’t get it!" he shouted, the force of his anger making you flinch. "I needed this win. Everything was riding on this."

You took a step back, feeling a mix of fear and sorrow. "I'm sorry," you whispered, unsure of what else to say.

He ran a hand through his hair, exasperated, and then turned away from you. "Just...leave me alone," he muttered, his voice still edged with anger.

Your heart ached at the distance between you. You wanted to reach out, to comfort him, but his fury made you hesitant. You stood there, torn between giving him the space he demanded and wanting to bridge the gap his disappointment had created.

Minutes passed in tense silence. Eventually, his shoulders sagged, and he turned back to you, the anger in his eyes replaced by regret. "I'm sorry," he said, his voice softer now, though it still carried the weight of his frustration.

You nodded, but the hurt lingered. "I know," you replied quietly, not sure if you believed it yet.

He stepped closer, his calloused hands reaching for you. His touch was gentle, a stark contrast to the harshness of his words earlier. He softly traced hearts on your face, the roughness of his fingers a reminder of the man he was — strong, yet capable of such tenderness.

You closed your eyes, trying to reconcile the conflicting emotions swirling within you. His anger had scared you, but his apology and the softness of his touch made you question your feelings. Could you forgive him so easily? Did his regret outweigh the sting of his outburst?

He continued to caress your face, his fingers moving in soothing patterns. "I hate that I took it out on you," he murmured, his breath warm against your skin. "I didn't mean to hurt you."

You opened your eyes, meeting his gaze. There was genuine remorse there, but also a desperation for your forgiveness. You wanted to trust him, to believe that this was just a moment of weakness, not a glimpse into a darker side of him.

"I don't know what to feel," you admitted, your voice barely above a whisper. "You scared me, Charles."

His face crumpled with guilt, and he pulled you into a tight embrace. "I know," he said, his voice thick with emotion. "I'm so sorry. Please, just give me a chance to make it right."

You stayed in his arms, your heart heavy with uncertainty. His touch was soothing, but the memory of his anger lingered. You wanted to forgive him, to move past this moment, but a part of you wondered if this was a sign of things to come.

As he traced another heart on your cheek, you closed your eyes again, trying to find clarity in the midst of the chaos. You loved him, but love alone couldn't erase the hurt. Only time would tell if his actions matched his words, if his tenderness could outweigh his anger.

For now, you held onto the hope that he could change, that the man who traced hearts on your face was the real Charles, not the one who lashed out in anger. And as you stood there, wrapped in his embrace, you silently prayed that your hope wasn't misplaced.

i can fix him, no really i can..

The evening had started off so well. Charles had invited you to a family dinner at his mother's house. Pascale, Arthur, Lorenzo, their girlfriends, and a few of the drivers were all there. The atmosphere was lively, filled with laughter and warmth. You felt a sense of belonging, surrounded by the people Charles loved most.

But as the night wore on, a seemingly innocuous comment about a minor mistake Charles made during a recent race triggered something in him. What began as light-hearted teasing quickly escalated into a heated argument. Charles' temper flared, his frustration from the season bubbling to the surface.

"You don't understand the pressure I'm under!" Charles shouted, his face flushed with anger. "It's not just a game to me!"

You tried to calm him down, to remind him that everyone was just joking, but he was too far gone. "Charles, it's just a silly mistake. Everyone makes them," you said gently, hoping to diffuse the situation.

But your words only seemed to fuel his rage. "You always take their side!" he snapped. "You never support me!"

The room fell silent. Pascale and the others exchanged uneasy glances, clearly uncomfortable with the turn the evening had taken. Arthur stepped forward, trying to intervene. "Come on, Charles, she’s just trying to help."

Charles whirled around to face his brother, his eyes blazing. "Stay out of it, Arthur. This is between me and her."

You felt a pang of hurt at his words, but also a rising determination to stand your ground. "I'm on your side, Charles. I always am," you said, your voice trembling with emotion.

He shook his head, his expression a mix of anger and frustration. "No, you're not. You never are."

With that, he stormed out of the room, slamming the door behind him. The silence that followed was deafening. Pascale sighed deeply, her face etched with worry. "Let him go, dear. He needs time to cool down."

Arthur put a comforting hand on your shoulder. "He’s being unreasonable. It's not your fault."

But you shook your head, tears welling up in your eyes. "I can fix him. No, really, I can," you insisted, your voice breaking. "He’s just under so much pressure. He doesn't mean it."

Lorenzo's girlfriend, Charlotte, gave you a sympathetic look. "We know he doesn't mean it, but you can't keep taking the brunt of his frustration. It's not fair to you."

You looked around the room, seeing the concern in everyone's eyes. They cared for you, and they cared for Charles, but they didn't understand. They didn't see the Charles you saw — the one who was vulnerable and scared, hiding behind his anger.

"I love him," you said quietly, more to yourself than anyone else. "And I know he loves me. I just have to be patient."

Pascale walked over and took your hands in hers, her eyes filled with motherly compassion. "Love is important, but it shouldn't hurt this much. Sometimes, it's okay to step back and let him come to terms with his own issues."

You nodded, but your heart was heavy with resolve. You knew they were right, but you couldn't give up on him. You had seen glimpses of the man he could be, the man he was when he wasn't weighed down by his own demons.

"I have to try," you whispered, more determined than ever. "I have to."

You slipped away from the group and found Charles outside, pacing back and forth, his hands clenched into fists. He looked up as you approached, his expression softening slightly. "I'm sorry," he said, his voice raw with regret. "I didn't mean to snap at you."

You stepped closer, reaching out to touch his arm. "I know you're under a lot of pressure, Charles. But you can't keep taking it out on me. We need to find a way to handle this together."

He nodded, pulling you into a tight embrace. "I know. I’m sorry," he repeated, his voice breaking. "I just...I feel like I'm drowning sometimes."

You held him close, your heart aching for him. "We'll figure it out," you promised. "But you have to let me in. You have to trust that I'm on your side."

He nodded against your shoulder, his grip tightening. "I do. I will."

As you stood there in the darkness, holding each other, you knew the road ahead would be difficult. But you were determined to help him, to fix what was broken. Because despite everything, you loved him. And you believed that love was worth fighting for, even when it hurt

trust me, i can handle a dangerous man..

The car ride home was supposed to be peaceful. The two of you had spent a pleasant evening with friends, but as you drove back, a comment about his racing performance earlier in the week had sparked an argument. The tension between you and Charles had been simmering for days, and now it was boiling over.

"You're always criticizing me," Charles snapped, his grip on the steering wheel tightening. "You think it's easy out there? You have no idea what it's like!"

You took a deep breath, trying to stay calm. "I'm not criticizing you, Charles. I'm just saying you need to be more careful. It's not just about you—there are other drivers, the team, and me."

His jaw clenched, and he pressed harder on the gas pedal. The car surged forward, the speedometer climbing rapidly. "You don't get to tell me how to drive," he growled.

Your heart started pounding, but you kept your voice steady. "Charles, slow down. This isn't the track."

He ignored you, his eyes fixed on the road ahead, his knuckles white against the wheel. The car continued to pick up speed, the scenery outside blurring into a streak of lights and shadows. Fear tightened your chest, but you refused to let it show.

"Charles, this is dangerous," you said firmly. "You're not thinking straight."

He shot you a fierce glare. "Stop trying to control me!"

You met his gaze, refusing to back down. "I'm not trying to control you. I'm trying to keep us safe. You're being reckless."

He let out a bitter laugh, his anger palpable. "You think you can handle everything, don't you? That you know better than me?"

Your patience snapped. "I can handle a dangerous man," you shot back, your voice rising. "But I'm not going to sit here and let you put our lives at risk because you're too stubborn to listen!"

Charles flinched as if you'd struck him. For a moment, the car seemed to hover on the edge of something catastrophic. Then, slowly, he eased off the gas, the car's speed gradually decreasing until you were traveling at a more reasonable pace. The silence that followed was thick with unresolved tension and unspoken words.

You both stared ahead, the only sound the hum of the engine and the faint whir of the tires against the asphalt. The anger and fear churned inside you, but you kept your composure, refusing to give in to the chaos.

Finally, you reached home. Charles parked the car and turned off the engine, but neither of you moved to get out. The weight of the argument hung heavy in the air.

"I don't want to fight," he said quietly, his voice breaking the silence.

You turned to look at him, your expression softening just a fraction. "Neither do I. But you need to understand that your actions have consequences. It's not just about you anymore."

He nodded, his eyes filled with a mixture of regret and exhaustion. "I'm sorry," he murmured, his voice barely audible.

You sighed, the tension slowly ebbing away. "We need to communicate better, Charles. We can't keep having these explosive arguments."

He reached for your hand, his touch tentative. "I'll try," he promised. "I don't want to lose you."

You squeezed his hand, offering a small, tentative smile. "I don't want to lose you either. But we have to work on this together."

With that, you both stepped out of the car and walked into the house in silence, the echoes of your argument lingering in the night air. The road ahead would be challenging, but you were determined to face it together, one step at a time.

Come close I'll show you heaven, if you'll be an angel all night..

The argument had been intense, but now the storm had seemingly passed. You and Charles found yourselves in the dimly lit living room, the atmosphere heavy with unresolved tension. He reached for you, his touch tentative at first, but quickly growing more insistent as he pulled you closer.

"I'm sorry," he murmured against your lips, his voice filled with regret. "I don't want to fight anymore."

You responded to his kiss, your anger melting away into a fervent need to reconnect. Your hands roamed over each other, the intensity of the make-out session escalating quickly. Lips met with a desperate passion, tongues intertwined, and the world outside ceased to exist.

"Come close," you whispered, your breath hot against his ear. "I'll show you heaven if you'll be an angel all night."

He paused for a moment, his eyes searching yours, a smirk playing on his lips. "Oh, really?" he teased, his voice low and husky.

His lips trailed to your neck, kissing the delicate skin there, taking it between his teeth and sucking it to leave a mark, making you gasp and moan at the sting, letting your head roll back.

You nodded, your fingers tracing the line of his jaw. "Yes, but you have to promise not to bring up the argument again. Let's just enjoy the night."

He chuckled, the sound dark and sardonic. "And if I don't behave? What happens then?"

You pulled back slightly, studying his face. "Then the deal's off. No more fighting, Charles. I mean it."

His expression hardened, the playful glint in his eyes replaced by a familiar edge of defiance. "You think you can control everything, don't you?" he said, his tone dripping with sarcasm. "Always trying to manage me, like I'm some child."

Your heart sank, the heat of the moment dissipating in an instant. "That's not what I meant," you said, trying to keep your voice steady. "I just want us to have a good night together."

He laughed bitterly, shaking his head. "Sure, whatever you say. As long as I'm your perfect little angel, right?"

The insult stung, cutting through the fragile peace you'd managed to build. Without another word, you pushed away from him, the anger and hurt flooding back. "You know what, Charles? Forget it. I thought we could move past this, but clearly, you're not interested."

You turned on your heel, heading for the door. Behind you, Charles called out, his voice tinged with frustration and regret. "Wait, don't go. I didn't mean it like that."

But you didn't stop. You couldnt. The promise of a passionate night had been shattered by his careless words, and you needed space to cool down and collect your thoughts.

As you walked away, you heard him sigh deeply, the sound filled with the weight of unspoken apologies and missed opportunities. The night that could have been spent in each other's arms was now tainted by lingering resentment and unresolved tension.

In the quiet of your room, you let the tears fall, mourning not just the lost night, but the growing distance between you. It would take more than apologies and promises to mend the rift, but for now, you needed to be alone.

The future was uncertain, but one thing was clear: you couldn't keep going on like this. Something had to change, and it had to start with him.

but your, good lord didn't need to lift a finger, i can fix him, no really i can....

The vacation had been a welcome escape from the relentless pressure of the racing season. You and Charles had joined a few of the drivers, including Lewis and Pierre, at a luxurious beachfront villa. The days were spent basking in the sun, enjoying the ocean, and indulging in rare moments of relaxation.

But even here, away from the track, the shadow of Charles' recent bad streak loomed large. It was a warm evening, the group gathered around a bonfire, laughter and conversation filling the air. Charles, however, seemed distant, his gaze fixed on the flickering flames.

"I feel like I need to pray," Charles said suddenly, breaking the jovial mood. "I need something to break this bad streak."

You squeezed his hand, trying to offer some comfort. "You know, you've always said I'm your good luck charm," you joked lightly. "You’ve got pole, fastest lap, and wins when I’m around. Maybe I’m the one you should be praying to."

There was a moment of silence. You expected a laugh, or at least a smile, but instead, Charles' expression darkened. He pulled his hand away, his eyes narrowing. "You think you're like God? That’s incredibly arrogant."

The words hit you like a slap. The laughter around the fire died instantly, replaced by stunned silence. You blinked, trying to process the sudden shift. "Charles, I was just joking," you said quietly, feeling the weight of everyone's eyes on you.

He stood up abruptly, his chair scraping against the wooden deck. "You don't get it," he snapped. "You think everything revolves around you."

Tears pricked at the corners of your eyes, but you fought them back. "I was just trying to lighten the mood," you said, your voice trembling. "I’m always here for you, trying to support you."

He scoffed, shaking his head. "Maybe I don’t need your kind of support."

The tension was palpable, the air thick with unspoken words. Lewis and Pierre exchanged concerned glances, clearly uncomfortable with the unfolding drama.

"Charles, that’s enough," Lewis said gently, stepping in to diffuse the situation. "We’re all friends here."

But Charles ignored him, turning on his heel and walking away, disappearing into the darkness. You stood there, feeling the sting of his words, the hurt cutting deep.

Pierre got up and walked over to you, his expression filled with empathy. "Hey," he said softly, placing a comforting hand on your shoulder. "Are you okay?"

You nodded, but the tears finally spilled over. "I can fix him," you insisted, your voice breaking. "No, really, I can."

Pierre sighed, his eyes sad. "You can't fix someone who doesn’t want to be fixed."

Lewis stepped closer, his gaze steady and compassionate. "You're better off without him if he keeps treating you like this. You deserve someone who appreciates you, not someone who lashes out."

You shook your head, the conviction in your voice wavering. "He’s just under so much pressure. He doesn’t mean it."

Lewis and Pierre exchanged another look. "Pressure or not, there’s no excuse for treating you this way," Lewis said firmly. "You need to think about yourself, too."

You wiped your tears, the reality of their words sinking in. But despite everything, you still loved Charles, still believed in the man you knew he could be. "I just need to talk to him," you said, more to yourself than to them.

Pierre gave you a small, sad smile. "Just be careful, okay? We’re here for you."

You nodded, taking a deep breath. The night that had started with so much promise was now marred by tension and hurt. As you walked away from the fire, your heart heavy, you knew you needed to find Charles, to try and reach him one more time.

You found him by the shoreline, the sound of the waves crashing against the sand echoing your turbulent emotions. He stood with his back to you, his posture rigid.

"Charles," you called softly, stepping closer.

He turned, his face illuminated by the moonlight, and for a moment, you saw the vulnerability beneath his anger. "I’m sorry," he said, his voice raw. "I didn’t mean to snap at you."

You reached out, taking his hand. "I know," you whispered. "But we can’t keep going on like this. We need to find a way to deal with this pressure without hurting each other."

He nodded, pulling you into an embrace. "I don’t want to lose you," he murmured into your hair.

You held him tightly, hoping that this time, things would be different. But a part of you couldn’t shake the fear that this cycle would continue, that the man you loved would keep lashing out in his moments of weakness.

As you stood there, wrapped in each other’s arms, the waves crashing at your feet, you silently prayed for strength—for both of you. Because love was worth fighting for, but you couldn’t do it alone. Charles needed to fight too, for himself and for you.

WOAH- maybe, i can't...

The villa was supposed to be a retreat, a place where you and Charles could escape the relentless pressure of the racing season and find some peace. But the calm had been shattered by yet another argument. The drivers who had joined you—Lewis, Pierre, and a few others—had made themselves scarce, sensing the brewing storm.

You were in the kitchen, the words flying between you and Charles like daggers. "You’re always on my back, always criticizing me," he shouted, his face red with anger. "Do you think I don’t feel the pressure already?"

"I’m not criticizing you, Charles," you replied, your voice shaking with frustration. "I’m trying to help you, to support you. But you keep pushing me away."

He scoffed, turning away from you. "Support me? By constantly nagging? That’s not support, that’s control."

You took a deep breath, trying to keep your composure. "I’m not trying to control you. I just want you to be your best, and that means sometimes you need to listen."

He whirled back around, his eyes blazing. "Listen to you? You think you know better than me? That you can fix all my problems?"

The words hit you hard. You had spent so much time believing that you could help him, that your love and support could make a difference. But now, standing there, the reality crashed down on you. He didn’t want to be fixed, didn’t want to change. He wanted to wallow in his frustration and drag you down with him.

"I thought I could fix you," you said, your voice breaking. "No, really, I did. I thought if I loved you enough, supported you enough, you’d see that you don’t have to go through this alone."

He rolled his eyes, a bitter laugh escaping his lips. "That’s your problem. You think you’re some sort of savior."

The anger flared inside you, hot and fierce. "And you think you can treat me like this and I’ll just keep coming back? You’re the one with the problem, Charles. You’re so caught up in your own misery that you can’t see what’s right in front of you."

He opened his mouth to retort, but you cut him off, your voice rising. "You know what? I can’t do this anymore. I can’t keep pretending that I can fix you when you’re not willing to fix yourself. I’m done."

Charles looked taken aback, his bravado faltering. "What are you saying?"

"I’m saying that I’m leaving," you said, the words steady and resolute. "I deserve better than this. Better than you."

You saw the shock in his eyes, the realization that you were serious. "You’re not serious," he said, but his voice lacked conviction.

"I am," you replied, turning to grab your bag. "I’m done being your punching bag. I’m done trying to save someone who doesn’t want to be saved."

You walked past him, heading for the door. As you reached for the handle, you felt a sense of clarity, of strength. "I can fix him, no, really, I can," you muttered to yourself, then shook your head. "Woah, maybe I can’t."

You opened the door and stepped outside, feeling the weight lift off your shoulders. As you walked down the path, away from the villa and from Charles, you heard the door slam behind you. He didn’t follow, didn’t call out to you.

The drivers who had been waiting outside looked up, concern in their eyes. Pierre stepped forward, his expression gentle. "Are you okay?"

You nodded, a small smile playing on your lips. "I will be."

Lewis came over, his hand resting on your shoulder. "You did the right thing. You deserve someone who values you."

You felt the tears well up, but they were tears of relief, of release. "Thank you," you said, your voice steady. "I needed to hear that."

As you walked away with your friends, leaving Charles and his toxicity behind, you felt a newfound sense of freedom. You had tried to fix him, but in the end, you had fixed yourself by walking away. And that was the greatest victory of all.

a/n : it appears I've given allll the angsty ttpd songs to charles 🥲 this one was painful to write. as always, comments likes reblogs feedback etc is always appreciated 🤍

TAGS-

ttpd series - @ateezseonghwanot @khaylin27 @imgondeletedis @jj-ever-lovely-jewel @stylestastic

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charles : - @chanshintien @eternalharry @janeholt @magicalcowboyarbiter @oneafterdark @leclerc13 @moon-enthusiast @crlsummer @superlegends316 @electrobutterfly @formula1mount @f1loverrr @livs @inkfablesandstories @ssararuffoni

f1 : @ivegotparticulartaste @moon-enthusiast @superlegend216 @theonly1outof-a-billion @williams-spare-chassis

TO BE ADDED TO THE TAGLIST SEND ME AN ASK OR A DM SPECIFYING WHICH FANDOM 🤍

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loving-n0t-heyting · 17 days

Text

read amebedkars the annihilation of caste, plus arundhati roys book-length historical preface. in honesty i prolly learned more from the latter, which is more than anything a screed against the cult of gandhi as mahatma, tho she does give the impression of a writer willing to selectively present historical facts to paint a narrative. still, its facts shes painting with, and in many cases its very hard to imagine any context that could exonerate gandhi from the relevant charges. certainly a helpful pov to finally read in depth rather than as offhand iconoclastic remarks

the speech itself i think left me more flummoxed. ambedkar is at his best when he is railing against the evils of the caste system and the implausibility of various defences and concessions made on its behalf. this is a pretty easy pitch for me tho, growing up as a westerner without any reason to be invested in the chatuvarna. its like the cagot, such an obviously perverse system from an external vantage point that it hardly seems fair to award credit for thoroughly denouncing it unless youve been raised to see it as natural. still, its very stirring as a bit of skewering, especially of the "moderate" and "reformist" casteist positions it attacks, and of the "caste-blind" socialists and liberals who ignore the internal divisions and acrimony the caste system imposes on their envisioned base

he is more compelling as a symptomatologist than as a diagnostician or prescriber/prognostician. he takes by the end what seems like a maximally anti-"materialist" view of the causes of the persistence of the caste hierarchy: the social phenomenon of caste is due entirely to vedic dogmatism, to the point that advocating social rather than doctrinal reforms (primarily: inter-dining and inter-marriage) is futile and self-defeating. this is the context for his remarks about the need to reject the authority of the shastras. this interpretation of the basis of caste discrimination is accompanied by a shocking proposed solution: a purified and democratised hinduism as a state religion, whose new priesthood and scripture/dogma are to be administered by the state itself. only thus can the plague of casteism be stamped out effectively at the root (retrograde religious beliefs)

the blow of what reads to my own usamerican sensitivities as a brand of revolutionary theocracy and state control of religion is somewhat softened by his apparent lack of ambition in implementing it. he is upfront that he thinks the kinds of anti-caste reform he is advocating are simply impossible in the face of hindu society, a demoralisation bolstered in part by a top-down view of social change on which it is only possible as guided by a societys intellectual class—which he identifies with the class least incentivised to upend the system: the brahmins. obviously i had seen ppl draw the analogy between usamerican antiblack racism and indian dalit suppression, but it had never occurred to me that the topic would invite the obvious caste analogue of afropessimism

on the topic of ambedkars predictions about the future of hindu society, its sort of interesting to place him in the context of the current ascendancy of hindutva on the subcontinent. where ive seen ppl (roy in the preface included) speak of modi and ambedkar in the same breath, its usually (when not simply whitewashing ambedkar) been to take him on board as an ally against the hindutva menace. but im not sure how well the text of the annihilation of caste supports that reading? not in terms of what ambedkar would think of modi and hindutva, ofc; its not at all hard to imagine which side he would come down on there. but at the core of much of his criticism of the caste system is its inflexibility and incompatibility with a modern, cohesive, mobilised nation state and nation-building project. a house divided against itself etc etc. on his view, the system introduced social resentments and hostilities too deep to permit a hindu identity that could effectively unite the national public. one is inclined to say: would that it were so!

anyway these are just rough first thoughts, its very much not a topic where ik a huge amount. still wanted to put them on paper for an audiencxe, just to help clarify them to myself more than anything

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kisseobie · 5 months

Note

hi I absolutely adore your writing!!! who do think amon piwon is a more love st first sight kinda a guy?

love at first sight

pairings: ot6 p1harmony x reader

warnings: none!

a/n: in my fantasy world they all fall in love with me at first sight but i’m gonna be as realistic as possible based off of their personalities and things the members have said themselves .. i hope u enjoy <33

𓈒ིུ keeho

i think i remember that on kyo and jiung’s radio show they mentioned this topic once and keeho was a firm believer that love at first sight doesn’t exist, that attraction can definitely be sensed straight away but love is only something that you can experience as you get to know the ins and outs of someone. that being said, for keeho, i would say that although no, he doesn’t fall in love with you at first sight, he does feel a gravitational pull towards your energy and approaches you right when he sees you, internally passing it off as just “wanting to meet new people” when in fact, his subconscious is telling him to introduce himself to you. love at first sight is non existent with keeho, but he knows that it feels right to be around you, which later may blossom into something more than just a “pull”.

𓈒ིུ theo

doesn’t have a set opinion on love at first sight, but i do think he’ll experience it with the right person. doesn’t know if it’s your smile, your beauty, or your charisma that has been on his mind since his first encounter with you, but he knows that it was meant to be. i can see taeyang being frustrated with how he feels after just meeting you, because “love at first sight” doesn’t even occur to him as an option to consider, but as he gets to know you in your future encounters, he begins to understand that that is exactly what he felt. i can envision theo as completely shifting from someone pretty indifferent about relationships to someone who constantly daydreams about seeing you again. so yes, in my opinion, i think theo would experience love at first sight!

𓈒ིུ jiung

no, but just like keeho, the attraction is definitely there. when he first laid his eyes on you, he could place you in his mind as both intelligent and beautiful, and that intrigues him. ji is not a risk taker, nor is he someone to believe in cliches, so he would rather opt to get to know you as a friend at first with no other intentions until he eventually does fall in love with you. but i’m gonna say that jiung is the most difficult to imagine “love at first sight” with. he’s a thinker that needs to analyze all parts about you before allowing himself to open his heart to you. i don’t see this as a bad thing though! i think jiung, as a deep thinker, is definitely the type to value personality the most, so when he does fall in love with you, there isn’t any doubts in his mind, and he knows it was meant to be.

𓈒ིུ intak

intak is tricky but i’m going to say no, only because he’s a social butterfly and feels the need to make a connection with anyone he meets. i don’t think that would change as it comes to you, and like jiung, he wouldn’t have any other intentions than becoming your friend (that doesn’t mean he doesn’t get nervous around you due to your beauty!! but he doesn’t quite perceive that as love). however, i do see intak as someone to fall in love quite quickly, so even if it wasn’t “love at first sight”, it happens very fast. he’s a forward man!

𓈒ིུ soul

as a great judge of character, i think shota would! but the idea of that definitely intimidates him, and frustrates him more than anything. he can tell when he’s drawn to someone and when he meets you, he feels something deeper than his usual desire to get close to someone. it isn’t how he felt with someone like keeho, who he automatically sensed comfortability with in a platonic sense. the butterflies in his tummy scare him, and he doesn’t know what to do with them. however, his infatuation with you definitely forces him out of his comfort zone, which leads to him seeking out your presence wherever he bumps into you, and what happens after that is for you to decide :p

𓈒ིུ jongseob

yes yes yes! and i’m not just saying that because he’s my ult lol in my crush headcanons i also mentioned this but i think seob is so beyond his years that love at first sight is definitely something he could experience. i believe that he wouldn’t be aware of this himself, so he probably would try to downplay how he felt when he first laid eyes on you as just mere attraction to a pretty girl, but it begins to click in his head when he can’t get you off his mind for the rest of the night, despite never holding a conversation with you. confides in shota because he thinks soul is the only one who wouldn’t tease him for how he’s feeling. shota eggs him on to get your number eventually, and he comes to realize after texting you that you might feel the same way about him too <3

taglist: @woozixo @hearts4chanhee @kyokopi @astro-doll-the-star @soobiary @kyaaramello @t3ssamoodboard @angelcbf @idontknow-1s-world @vivienne-sim @elissasimp @imjustayapper @ihatewreckingballmains @sosaverse @seobing @www90kitsch @khfviq @barbiekh86t @bbyjjunie @taeyangi @fullsunstrawberry @jihnyah @intheemptymirror @watamotee33 @dreamer1299 @jixnnsie @wonootnoot @yukx-x047

° . ❀

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sefinaa · 5 days

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A message you may need to hear. 💌

Masterlist.

Note: Not my usual thing, yet lately I have been hearing small messages throughout the day regarding my intuition, so I thought about making small posts about them. A pac will come soon, I have been busy lately. Also, if you wanted to find any of my timeless reading without pacs, I made a section for it on my masterlist named "nonpac intuitive messages/posts.''

A lot of times we wish we could go back into the past and erase what has happened. However, we forget that our past selves believed it was the right choice, and it was the best choice for them to get the thing they had desired and deserved. But it is forgotten that your past self did not know the knowledge you know now in your present time, nor did they have the same mindset as you do now, and the same will appear for yourself in the future. Do you want to repeat the same situation in your future, or do you prefer to forgive yourself now and learn to appreciate your past self for what they thought was right? Because of what your past self did, you are suffering the consequences of something you did not wish for, yet it is what you need. There is a lesson reoccurring for you that you have not been taught nor used as motivation to get the wish you wanted. Instead of being consumed with your regrets, work on what you want and get it. Staying in the same place will not help you achieve what you desire but instead keep you stagnant. I understand that the pain is painful and has led you to feel as if you were mud and rain was falling and the droplet hit you, and as you tried to get up, children rain boots jumped on you as the children laughed and had fun while you were ceasing to exist. But the anger, guilt, and stress you feel is all part of life, and you have to learn to utilize those feelings into something magical. Learn to work on yourself and change your mindset so you genuinely know what you want. The thoughts on who you desire to be and what you want are the fear that lingers on your mind, but these are not you. It’s the safe option that we humans will automatically choose if they do not know themselves or have no confidence of getting what they believe can be true.

You may be thinking, “Sefina, this is easier said than done,’’ and that is true, but everything in life can either be a breeze or our death, whether it’s mentally or physically. You must decide what type of life you truly want, what the outcomes can or will be, and how it plays a factor within your life. Allowing yourself to cry is healthy, but to always cry a night feeling as everything it out to get you or make you suffer may lead you to a road of destruction, whether it is with others or with yourself. Do understand that life cannot change if the person does not want to change. Think of a group of people in a group; a leader appears amongst them, but they are shy and cannot say what they want to say without stumbling with their words. But one day, they decide to change because this is not what they envisioned themselves to be, and so they do change, and life changes for them and creates beautiful new things. No, it was not easy for them, but with that change, they became the person they envisioned, and the same can go for you. Learn to understand why people say ‘’change starts within,’’ because it does. Without you changing your mindset and learning what you want, getting what you desire becomes hard. You become your blockage, and then you will start to wonder why you cannot manifest what you want. Do not become your own blockage, nor be oblivious that you are in your way.

Once you are able to understand that life can be easy as you work on yourself instead of focusing on the external views you have around you, you will achieve what you set your mind on. My intuition says, ‘’the worst time is your best time. Beautiful things appear to us regardless if it’s a painful time or a blessing time—more beautiful things will appear if your heart is just as beautiful as your wants.’’ Meaning, if you focus on what you actually want within your heart and learn how to fall in love with yourself, whether it’s who you are as of now or changing to become your best self, everything will start to fall into place without you doing anything other than dealing with the internal factors.

A scene has appeared in my mind where a person has two jobs; they went to college to have two college degrees because they wanted to major in two different fields but could not decide which was their dream job. So instead of settling with one, they went back and got another, and now they are working on both fields. For some, this sounds like a hassle, but for them, this is their dream life. Everything is subjective, our wants and likes are simply an opinion and nothing more. They can be something dear to us, but still an opinion, especially to others, unless they relate, in which case the opinion can become a fact, but only in that community or between you and them.

You are a logical person, you never truly focused on what your heart wanted from you and decided to focus on what your fearful mind wanted without understanding that this is the reason why you are stuck in your situation right now. You cannot hate and nitpick your past self because you are the reason for being toxic with yourself. Logical decisions can help people, but ignoring your heart and what your heart wants strains the bond of your relationship with yourself. Understand that your desires are focused on your heart; your feelings are your likes and dislikes.. and despite everything being subjective, these are still your wants, correct? So, ask yourself why you allow your fearful thoughts to invade things for you instead of picking what your heart wants. The heart has a bad reputation as people are prone to believe emotions, and following your heart is weak and idiotic, yet it is everything around us, whether people want to believe it or not. Working hard to have your dream job is logical, yes, but it is also following your heart and working hard to get it. Making a rational decision and not focusing on your feelings is still part of the heart. Why? Because you are focusing on your best case scenario and wanting to do what is best for you. I understand that you also have a bad perception of emotions because if you have them, then you must reveal how vulnerable you truly are, yet you cry at night and show it to yourself. What truly makes you afraid of being vulnerable? And why did it show up throughout your middle school era? Learn to feel okay asking yourself personal questions and be patient with yourself if you do not know of the answer. Everything needs compassion and patience.

Learn not to neglect your present self out of love, appreciation, and understanding. It’s okay, I understand that you are struggling right now, but taking care of yourself is also important. It helps heal the emotional wounds that were created by others, but in this case, your family members. It connects you and makes you feel worthy of love; don’t you believe that you are worthy of it? Maybe not now, but I know that you do. Forgive your past self and show appreciation so in the future, instead of you insulting your past self (it being you right now), your future self can salute you for trying. That is what healing is, and it’s rather beautiful if you learn that lesson properly.

Divider

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tw1l1te · 7 months

Text

𝓣𝓱𝓮 𝓒𝓱𝓪𝓲𝓷 𝓗𝓮𝓪𝓭𝓬𝓪𝓷𝓸𝓷𝓼- 𝖕𝖆𝖗𝖙 1

These are from the FinalPromise!Au. Some will be directly from the og Linked Universe, as I don't envision my story as straying tooooo far from the original. I might add more in the future, but these are the ones that I am thinking of for now! This is part 1/3, which includes Time, Twilight, and Wild! :3

Warnings: mention of scars

⋆｡°✩

𝖙𝖎𝖒𝖊

Mans in his early 30s in terms of appearance (actual age is unclear)

Speaks Hylian well but writing? Not so much. Growing up in Kokiri Forest doesn't really help in terms of school smarts, so he had Wars and Sky teach him a bit later down the line.

Has a slight Southern accent, way less prominent than Twilight's though. It comes out more when he's tired or being more flirty (Or doing it on purpose to fluster Y/n.)

Him and Malon are exes? It was a situationship, they didn't really put a word on it. She was there after his quest to support him and keep a roof over his head. They're more like family/friends now

Very tall. We're talking over 6 foot here, and he will also use that to tower over Y/n. They're into that

Also pretty muscular. He was more lean muscle when he was a teen/young adult, but he's bulked up especially since donning the armor.

Has rib tattoos, similar to the Deity markings on his face.

Only has his lobes pierced, however he wants to experiment with more piercings like Twilight.

Has some scarring on his stomach from the battle at the Water Temple, its faded over the years but its still noticeable if you look hard enough

Doesn't sleep well, so takes over night watch a lot. Twilight has to stop him from not sleeping for over 48-hours as that gets him into dangerous mental space territory.

I wanna say he's one of the first member of the chain to feel something for Y/n. I see a lot of pics placing him last usually, but I feel like he's one of the first, especially having tons of time to think about it at night and being the eldest.

Although he's one of the earliest to reveal his feelings to Y/n, he's still processing and taking it slow in terms of bringing it up to the rest of the group.

𝖙𝖜𝖎𝖑𝖎𝖌𝖍𝖙

Time's his great great grandfather?? Some great, he's not quite sure

Twilight's in his early/mid 20's

His hair is a brown-gray mix, the grey becoming more prominent ever since his first time shifting into his Wolf form.

Southern drawl, need I say more

Ears are pierced, has double lobe piercings and an upper cartilage piecing

Pretty tall, close to 6 foot, maybe 5' 11"

Other than the Twili markings on his face, he has a small tattoo of a hoof to commemorate for Epona on his ankle

His markings do extend down his spine and upper arms which make a delicious sight when he's training or above Y/n

Some scarring on his legs and arms from his journey, one longer scar on his right ear from a close call with a Twilight creature once.

Senses are like tripled ever since becoming Wolfie, mr. cowboy can smell things like a mile away.

Similar to Time in terms of build, maybe slightly leaner because of his height

However his voice is the deepest of the group. Mans got the range in octaves and that sexy rasp that he will use to his advantage

Like his ancestor, one of the first to have/admit feelings toward Y/n

However, having a Wolf form also speeds up the feelings of protectiveness obsessiveness... and certain other things.

Has such a sweet tooth.

Loves chocolate so much but ever since Wolfie happened, he can barely eat any 'cause he got that dog in him

Protective of Wild too, other than Y/n, he's probably the only other person that knows what he's been through

𝖜𝖎𝖑𝖉

18-19 years old, his adventure has just recently finished

His hair is longer than in his quest to save the princess, though definitely more choppy and wolf cut-like when not in his ponytail

Definitely more lean muscle in terms of build, and is probably average in height

Has triple pieced lobes and a few cartilage piercings, plans on getting more

Left side of his body is heavily scarred, partially deaf in his left ear. Also tends to lose feeling in his left arm and leg, so he prefers to use his right side

Can actually read and speak Hylian How do you think he read everyone's diaries

As we all know, he's one of the best cooks in Hyrule and can cook almost anything, but his favorite thing to make has got to be meat curry and a simple nut cake.

After you came along and introduced him to your foods??? Oh boy he's never been so excited-

Somehow made your favorite foods better than they already were

Closer with Twilight and Legend

Takes longer to catch feelings for you, as the mere concept of feeling toward another person is still a confusing topic for him since his slumber

One of the last ones to catch feelings for you, partially in denial because his belief of not being good enough for you/being very harsh on himself

Twilight almost immediately catches onto Wild's attraction towards you, Wild's not the best at masking nervousness around you

⋆｡°✩

#yandere linked universe #yandere linked universe x reader #linked universe x reader #linked universe au #linked universe headcanons #final promise au

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piastriesque · 2 months

Text

not your future fa14 x reader

⤷pairing: fernando alonso x fem!reader

⤷warnings: age gap

⤷summary: for the sake of your boyfriend's happiness, you made the decision to break up with him

⤷word count: 1.4k

note: i don't usually write, even if i do it's in my first language, not english, so i'm kinda scared. i apologize for all the mistakes. if you point them out to me, i will correct them!

The sound of falling drops got on your nerves. You were waiting for the man to finish showering. You were pacing around the room, wanting to get it all over with already. The sudden sound of a closing door startled you so much that you almost jumped. You quickly sat down on the couch.

A moment later, your boyfriend Fernando entered the room. He was wearing only gray shorts.

“I forgot to take my T-shirt with me,” he smiled innocently, though you could bet he was teasing you. When you barely reciprocated the smile, he felt that something was wrong. He walked toward you and reached his hand not far from you. Only now did you notice that there was “the forgotten” T-shirt lying nearby. The man put on the shirt in silence, covering the samurai tattoo you so adored. The T-shirt stuck to his back, you guessed that he must not have wiped himself thoroughly.

“Is something wrong?” he asked, sitting next to you. Even though earlier you wanted to get it off your chest as soon as possible, now you lacked the courage. “You seem a little subdued lately. Do you have any problems? Did something happen at work? Or maybe it's about your parents?” he wanted to know.

You shook your head, denying. You didn't have time to form the words in your head, because your boyfriend kept asking.

“Does it have anything to do with me? Have I done something wrong?” he grabbed your hands. This gesture made you look at him. His beautiful brown eyes were worried, and still-wet strands of hair fell on his forehead.

“No, you haven’t done anything wrong.” You swallowed saliva and then slowly took your hands from his grasp. “I… I think… I have realized that this will not work” you mumbled.

“What? What do you mean?” he felt as if he had been hit on the head.

“I think we should break up”

“But why?”

When you looked away, refraining from crying, he stood up and started walking nervously around the room. So many thoughts were swirling in his head. He didn't understand anything. Not long ago, you said you were the luckiest woman in the world, having him by your side. What has changed?

“Have I done something wrong?” he asked for the second time that evening, after a while, he added, “Do you have someone else?”.

“There is no one else. And you haven't done anything wrong. You have always been so good to me.” Your heart ached more and more with every word you spoke, “But we envision our future differently.”

“Really? Until now, I thought we wanted the same thing.” He sat down again, “Please, look at me,” his voice softened, “To me, my future is you.”

You couldn't hold back any longer. You burst into tears. Fernando put his arm around you, and because you didn't protest, he pulled you close.

“It’s okay,” he started stroking your head, “Tell me exactly what's going on, I'm sure we can deal with it together somehow.”

“No, we really can't” you whispered against his chest.

“Well, then…” he gulped, “How do you imagine your future?”

His hand kept gently caressing your hair. You felt bad about him being so gentle and tender, trying to reassure you. The thought crossed your mind that you would have preferred him to be mad. Maybe then this conversation would have been easier. He would have started shouting, and you would hit back. Love, for a moment, would be overshadowed by anger. Instead, there was something extremely innocent and fragile sitting next to you. Although it tried not to show it, you knew he was hurting inside.

You took a deep breath. “It doesn't matter anymore, but…” you saw him open his mouth. “Please, don't interrupt me. But… I always imagined that one day we would get married. We would adopt a dog. We will travel together, I will cheer for you at the races. Perhaps we would be able to do some projects together. It would look more or less like it does now… Plus a dog. You and I, always together,” the man smiled softly, “Just the two of us”.

“I don't understand”

“I’m not ready to have a child”

Silence fell over the room. The man's face showed confusion and surprise.

“I understand, but why are you talking about it? I never pressed for it. We've talked about this before. We don't need to rush.”

“Yes, we talked, but recently I realized that I am not ready for it. I would like to focus on myself, my career, and my self-development. I still have time to become a mother. And you, how long can you wait?”

Fernando didn’t answer.

“There is no denying it, the age difference between us is quite significant. I don't need to rush, I can become a mother even in 10 years or later. And you… I know you love children. I want you to be at full strength to play with your own”.

“Remember what I said a few minutes ago? You are my future. I want to be with you. No matter what. I love you” he declared.

“I love you too. That's why I don't want to regret something later. I can't do that to you” You stood up and left the room.

You and he had a few more conversations with each other, but eventually, the man realized that you were adamant. He stopped sending messages and calling. You agreed that since emotions were still strong, you should not have any contact, even friendly contact, at least for a while. However, before you knew it a year passed, then 2…. And recently it was the 4th anniversary of your breakup. Neither of you has contacted the other. At first, you lacked courage, you were afraid that the other person might not want to talk, and then, although it's sad to admit, you got used to the absence from each other's lives.

It's all been very hard for you. After the breakup, you notoriously avoided articles about him to avoid thinking about your ended relationship. Later it became a habit for you. You were completely unaware of what was going on in his life. You had no idea even if he was still driving in Formula One.

Sitting on a park bench, you were drinking coffee. You took a break from work to get some air and breathe. By the way, you decided to take your dog for a walk, he was now lying next to your legs and snoring peacefully until…

“Puppy!” you heard a child's scream. It was a little girl, two or three years old. She extended her hand towards your dog.

Immediately afterward, a man appeared at her side, addressing her in Spanish. Even if you knew Spanish well, you wouldn't be able to understand a word, because the man's presence completely took away your ability to think.

“Hi” Fernando said kindly but was also slightly surprised to see you.

“Hi” you replied, praying that a quaver in your voice could not be heard.

“It’s my daughter” he turned his head towards the girl “Why don't you introduce yourself to the lady”

The girl did what her dad asked her to do. Shyly smiling at the same time.

“Beautiful name. It's nice to meet you. My name is Y/N” you reciprocated the smile.

You noticed that the girl's gaze once again went to your dog. You weren't the only one who saw it.

“You should ask the owner's permission to pet the dog first”

“Can I?” she asked with hope in her eyes.

“Of course, you can,” you laughed kindly.

The girl squealed with joy and immediately approached the animal.

“So… how are you?” the Spaniard asked.

You managed to talk for 10 minutes, then had to say goodbye, because they were in a bit of a hurry, and the man promised to buy his daughter an ice cream before returning home.

You felt as if some void in your heart was filled. It was a relief to see him happy. Even though, you were ultimately not the one who was his future.

#fernando alonso #fernando alonso x reader #fernando alonso x you #fernando alonso imagine #fa14 #f1 x reader #f1 x you #f1 x female reader #fernando alonso x female reader #f1 imagine

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reveriememory · 19 days

Text

⭐️ °. • Thank You Neil • .° ⭐️

I pushed myself to finish this in time, and I did! I met Neil, and gave him a physical copy. Till this day, I just freak out when I remember… I really admire him! I’ll talk about that and this art piece after the Read More if you’d like to hear about that.

This art piece started in October, last year as an Astarion fan piece, but overtime I realized I wanted to do something more meaningful. I’ve known of Neil since DBH, so why not create something for him? So I added in Neil, and then I left it alone for months. Didn’t really think anything of it since usually all my art follows this treatment. I focus on it for a whole two weeks and then it fades into the background. However, I got word that Neil was coming to my area, and that’s when I started freaking out. Like, oh my god, I need to finish this… can I give this to him? I’ve never gone to a convention before… what am I gonna do?

So I kept debating to finish this, because I didn’t know what was allowed, and if I could even finish in time, how would I even print this? I mean, I can just finish it at my own pace and tag him or something. In the end, I decided that it’s more important to me to get it to him in person, that way I can also get my copy signed. I had to plan this all out, and long story short, I rushed it in a week. I pulled two all-nighters, and just REALLY rushed on poor Gavin in the background. Gavin was actually a last minute decision! I would’ve added Kamski, but he’s literally just a face copy of Neil so I decided against that, and Gavin was the close second. The reason I chose DBH was because that’s where I first discovered Neil. I was a fan of this game when it first released. Heisenberg was another option, but I never got to his part of the game so I felt it wasn’t a good pick since I was going under personal limitations. Not to mention, really low on time. However, I added some references on the wall, specifically the ones where it was games that I had played! I could’ve added more, but again- time. I drew them in a motion capture studio, because I envision Neil practicing and performing with the characters he had worked on. I just felt like It was a cute little idea, and I admire Neil for his motion capture the most. It’s something I’m trying to get into, or some form of it at least.

Then. The Day.

AHHHHHH. I was starstruck. I’m just going to sum it up and talk about this specific moment. I’m next in line and I just blurt out, “I’m trying really hard not to get starstruck!” But I’m already shaky and half my memory gone. I was so anxious, trying to get through the moment that I didn’t really get to enjoy the moment, but man, am I still happy. I tell him about the piece and he’s like oh, what have you been working on? The drawing got jammed in its protector, so I was just struggling with it. “OH, sorry, it’s stuck!” And he thankfully found it funny. Gave it to him, got my copy signed and perfect. But AHHHH, I’m anxious right? I ask him if he could sign the back of it, because I was worried I’d cringe at the piece in the future. I normally don’t call my art cringe but why, why was I THAT honest—

He’s so quick to reply, super sweet man, just tells me no, don’t cringe. He also asked me about my focus in motion capture, but that’s another post for another day. I have something in the works for that!

Look, in my defense! I RUSHED the piece, so I knew I’d get a bit irritated in the future seeing my art and knowing I had the time to really do a beautiful job! I just meant that knowing how much potential I had, had I taken advantage of that, it would have turned out so much… not better, but to my liking. I’m content, considering the limitations, but… y’know? Anyways, I still wanted to look at his signature and proudly display that, like aye, I got to meet him!

Considering that I rarely draw real people, I’m definitely proud with how Neil turned out. Just like Neil told me, and many others, can’t be too harsh with myself. When working on this, I was super excited and actually thrived while working on it. Yes, under pressure, but dedicated. I can’t remember the last time I ever fixated on an art piece like this. With that said, I definitely want to try again in the future and get better at drawing semi-realism. And Neil is coming back to my area next year so… ideas.

Anyways, thank you for reading my little journal entry! Back to work I go~

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edelfie · 14 days

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#𝓣𝗔𝗦𝗧𝗘! this means war.

while you are off doing your own thing, being controversial and whatnot, a certain pest in your side seems to be buzzing about. unfortunately for her though, she’ll have to try a little harder to keep up with you.

or, lia loses her mind a little

POST CREDITS! —

As far as Lia is concerned, you are nothing more than an obstacle in her way. Sure, a persistently irritating obstacle, but a measly one nonetheless. Whatever game you were trying to get at wouldn't work on her.

She really shouldn't be wasting her energy on you anyways. She already has everything she wants: the best job in the world, all the money a girl could dream of, and her fiancé. Keyword: hers. Perhaps she is a bit territorial, but isn't it natural for any girl to be with their things?

Following their heated argument though, she isn't so certain where she stands with the man in question. She knew her words were hurtful the moment her fingers flung across the screen, and she won't fawn and play innocent knowing that was exactly why she sent them in the first place. It's just...so hard to communicate her emotions to Atsumu when he takes everything she says or does as a joke.

It's funny. Everyone in her life has expressed their own feelings about the constant push and pull of their relationship. Years of infrequent dating and uncertain feelings culminating into a very real, very permanent engagement was not how she envisioned their relationship ending. Because while Lia thinks she loves Atsumu, she knows he's difficult to be with.

When they were younger and had just started dated, she gave him the benefit of the doubt more often than not. That he was simply "like that", constantly riding on the brink and not giving a damn about what others thought about him. And to a degree, she found him aspirational for that and even wanted to replicate him in that sense.

That was, until, it started affecting her work. She began losing brand deals and sponsorships because the boy she was dating couldn't behave himself for the two hours he was in public. It was ridiculous! At times, it felt like she wasn't his girlfriend, but his mother, his publicist, and his manager all in one. And maybe that does make her selfish for not going to his games, but when does she get to be selfish in their relationship?

She feels the most empowered, the most authentic, the most selfish every time she calls it off. She gets to enjoy her freedom, then watch as Atsumu comes crawling back to her. Sometimes he outright says he'll change (he doesn't usually), or he'll demand that she "match his effort" (she won't). Maybe it's antithetical to some, but for Lia it just makes sense.

So despite dating Atsumu Miya being equivalent to forcing a square into a circle, Lia would rather die than let anyone take him away from her.

NOTES! —

Sorry for the smaller chapter today! I just couldn’t think of a way to fluff it up that wouldn’t already be included in future chapters. If I do get any ideas though, I’ll be sure to update this and post a notif. Also, Lia isn't meant to be like a token "mean girl", she's very flawed and human and that's a result of her environment. She is still bitchy of course, but not evil. Anyways, today’s fundraiser is to help the Liberty Lancers Marching Band purchase new uniforms! While it may seem miniscule compared to other "issues", as someone who's partner marches and has come to love band themselves, having new uniforms would mean the world for these students. You can click here to donate or read more on their story.

In other news, I am back from my (tiny) break! Though I’ll admit, I didn’t use that time wisely to plan ahead for my next releases LOL. I had fun though! Starting on Friday evening, I made a new group of friends! I signed up to be in a buddy-program with international students, and I found out my buddy that day (if that makes sense). I’m so lucky because we have so much in common! My buddy and I (plus another buddy pair we’re friends with) went to a football game on Saturday, but I only really cared for the pretzels and marching band LOL. The opposing team’s band was so good and I was literally mesmerized by their majorette dancers.

And then I presented my speech in class on Tuesday, which wasn’t as scary as I thought but I’m still glad it’s over LMAO. After that I went to the gym to work out for about 30 mins, before heading home to go on a date with my partner. We walked around downtown and went bowling, to which he absolutely wiped the floor with me I fear. And then today in one of my classes we had a rock, paper, scissors tournament (gotta love college LOL) and…I WON! We did it a few times but I just kept winning or getting very close, so I was named the RPS champion. Anyways, here’s a picture of me and my buddy down below ^-^

PREV + MASTERLIST + NEXT

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captainmera · 3 months

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Mx.mera!! (No pressure take all the time you need ) when is the next tgb chapter ?? :3

It's on indefinite hold atm, dont expect updates anytime soon. I'm juggling a lot atm.

(None of this is directed at you personally. This is just my general state on working on TGB and why it is standing stale. If you're curious why it's not updating)

TGB was always meant to just be a fun side thing I did as a writing exercise. It helped me identify a lot of my writing flaws and hiccups, and also my writing style. Which has been very enlightening.

There's a lot with TGB I need to go back and edit, so I need to re-read my own work (which I've been informed is the length of two LOTR books?? Sweet jesus, I need to cut it down) before I get back to it.

My ideas have become much longer and drawn out than I wanted, the pacing is very slow (which is fine, but I wanna get to the fun parts.) Which is another problem I've identified. I'm writing book form, chapter by chapter, rather than the episodes I'm seeing in my head. And it's frustrating.

Because I see it as episodes, but write them out, the chapters get really long. And I spend a lot of time being anxious about that.

Drawing comics is easier because I don't have to describe feelings or environments. I can just show it right away.

And no, I'm not gonna draw TGB as a comic. That's too much. I tried drawing future scenes (as comics) I thought of and wanted to envision, but I got people being upset about it being spoilers. So I stopped doing that.

Actually, I got worried about anything I drew of any characters being spoilery because I'd get asks or comments about it being for TGB. I usually just delete comments or asks like that, so I don't have to see it, but reading so much of it builds up in my head, yknow?

I also got a few people (might've been just one person. They were on anon) that wouldn't stop berating me about Willow and Hunter's body types. And some people got REALLY weird and insinuated that drawing them hugging and kissing was sexual. And some people try to trick me into drawing fetish things (feederism being one).

So, in all honesty? I liked writing TGB, with all the flaws it has or not. I loved drawing Huntlow and the hexsquad; until people got 1) weird about it. 2) pushy about continuing it. 3) upset it wasn't writing fast enough or I didn't draw x, y, z.

It honestly has robbed me of all the fun to post fanart.

Which is a shame because I still like the characters a lot.

I know that if I update a chapter, I'll get a revival of people spamming me these things again, and I'm not mentally or emotionally strong r/n for any of that.

So.... I'm doing witteclaw. Because nobody is pressuring me to do anything. Not to update, not to draw x,y,z. People are just happy with whatever I put out in whatever pace I put it out in. I get to talk with people about theories about the show and discuss writing in a fun, mature, way.

I also just really like witteclaw in general. But I don't like ut more than the hex kids. There's just less demand and pressure.

Which makes hanging out in the fandom still fun.

Don't get me wrong. I love sweet huntlow, I love the noceda trio, the galactic duo are still my best boys (i miss drawing gus and hunter), and the emerald trio is my blorbos (I got so many pins and keychains u guys lol) and I love the hexsquad the most, I love soft lumity, I wanna draw more grunge Vee, Camila is best mum.

The owl house is SO much fun.

But the fandom is kind of demanding. And maybe that's my fault for having open requests. But I don't regret that, I do enjoy art requests.

But people got less polite and more demanding, and some got angry(?), and some use lingo that I understand is meant to be funny but comes across as incredibly entitled and mean spirited. Some also don't seem to understand I'm a person, and that all art takes time. I had a person once get upset that I didn't out enough effort into their request as I had into another. Which... girl, you're not paying me, sit down.

It got pretty uncomfortable. It stole the fun out of drawing similar things for people who asked nicely and enthusiastically. I also realised a lot of these people read TGB, since requests were often about that.

It wouldn't always be art requests. It would just be a straight-up request to write the next chapter already.

TGB was fun, until the pressure to prioritise it became the majority from people who followed me. and people wrote things like:

Tbf that's the only one who dared to be that public about it. But I get asks like this at least once a week, and I turned off DMs because it happened every second to third day.

It's like.... not very nice or cool, yknow? :,(

it genuinely has made me feel really sad about working on my passion project IBWR too. Because people kept making it pretty clear they were annoyed I spent time on something else than what they were following me for.

It's like, whatever I guess, but it still hurts.

TD;LR

No, no tgb anytime soon. A few people killed the party, and I need time to like it again how I used to. Without the enjoyment of creating and writing, and enjoying the process, bring robbed from me.

Thanks.

Maybe I just need thicker skin I dont know. I'm trying to find a good balance with it. People are allowed to like/dislike my work and comment on it. I don't mind critique. It's just not really been critique at all? It's just demands and that hits different on the heart.

#tgb #tgb ask

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extremelyblackandwhite · 1 year

Text

pairing: dad!bucky barnes x au pair!reader

warnings: age gap (reader is 10 years younger than bucky), female masturbation, mentions of sex, smut (18+, dni if under 18)

summary: there’s something about bucky that she never allowed herself to fully explore.

Sadie had always been a quiet baby, even the day he first met her. She was just there, on the entry mat of his flat, wrapped in hospital blanket, laid on her back and sleeping peacefully. He could not believe that such peace, such overwhelming purity had somehow came from him. Ever since, that remained. She was well behaved, usually being happy if someone she knew was around. She was the best thing that could’ve possibly come from him and as he laid her down in her bed, surrounded by another pile of plushies which she demanded she had to sleep next to every night, that feeling that his little girl only had him, the most imperfect person he knew, made his heart stop even if for a second. He shook those thoughts from his mind, distracting himself by pulling the comforter over his daughter and kissing her head, turning the lights off as he exited the room. This was not it. Not what he envisioned when he allowed himself the chance to think of a future where he had children. If he had allowed himself the fantasy when he was younger, he would’ve rather had a traditional home somewhere in the suburbs where everyone was sure to somehow get in his nerves but was safer. The home would be homey, walls covered in photos from a single live well lived, a wedding photo at the entry door and three jackets in the same colour but different sizes. He thought if he ever had children, he would be married to someone he loved and loved him back. Yet, he’d only allowed himself the childish notion of love towards himself to ran wild before he got into the army, before the accident. Truth was, after the accident he didn’t want a bride and he certainly didn’t want children. He wasn’t naive enough to believe himself unattractive, he knew he was, he knew he was magnetic. However, he knew the difference between magnetism, passion and love. Love and lust may go together, but they don’t arise together, not at the beginning.

Parts of him sometimes wished things would’ve worked out with Sadie’s mother. God, he’d tried. He’d been an idiot before, begging on his knees to a woman who couldn’t care less about the child she’d abandoned on his doorstep, to please give him a chance. He had begged her to allow him to show her a nice life, even if she didn’t love him, even if she didn’t like him. Heck, he’d even attempted to pay her, just so Sadie would have a mother. Just so Sadie would know her mother. The sad truth was that Sadie’s mother didn’t want to be her mother. She didn’t even want to be reminded of Sadie’s existence except for when she needed money. For her, Sadie was an accident. Heck, for her she didn’t even know their child was even named Sadie. She didn’t care. Bucky tried to pretend he didn’t care either but he did. He wanted Sadie happy. He couldn’t be the best dad, he knew that, but he could try to give her everything.

He popped the glass lid off the whiskey bottle on his drink cart, pouring himself a very generous glass. Maybe he should put some photos up on the walls. Yet, he doubted his interior designer would be very happy about it.

- Is she off for the night? - Y/N came down the stairs, dressed in her beige loungewear and carrying the single cup of tea she seemed to always have around her. He nodded, taking another sip of his drink while staring into pure nothingness. - I’m taking her to the park tomorrow morning. Playdate with one of the kids from school.

- Where did you learn to shoot?

- How is that relevant to your daughter’s playdate?

- No one shoots that well as a first timer. - he turned to look at her. - That’s no beginners luck. That’s good shooting.

- My older brother used to have fun shooting cans down with BB guns when we were kids. He taught me.

- You have a brother?

- How is that relevant?

- We never actually talk, Y/N. You spend days with my kid and I don’t know much about you. I’m curious. - he sat on his couch, patting the seat next to him. - Trust me, doll. It pays off being in my good graces.

- Don’t care. You already pay me. - she leaned on the back of the couch, looking at him with a smug grin. - Quite handsomely, actually.

- Do you want a drink?

- I have a drink. - she rose her cup of tea.

- A proper drink. I have the good stuff, doll. Besides, Sadie’s asleep and your boss won’t care if you have a drink or two. - he got up, ready to pour her something. - Come on. When will you be able to drink 50 year old scotch?

- You have 50 year old scotch? - she peaked over to the trolley. - Is that even drinkable? Has it not developed a weird taste? Does the scotch know women have rights now?

- Don’t get too used to it. They cost a pretty penny. - he handed her a glass. - Worth it.

- How much does it cost?

- Just enjoy yourself.

That was good scotch. She probably had no qualification to be deciding what was good and what was bad scotch but she was entirely sure this was good scotch. Good strong scotch and just by the second glass, the two of them were giggling like two school girls, her cup of tea long forgotten.

- C’mon, c’mon ... - she playfully slapped his arm. - You slept with at least one of them. They’re hot.

- I don’t sleep with my employees. I’m a good boss.

- But she’s so hot. - she hammered on. - I would sleep with her if I swung that way. Is that a rule? Only hot secretaries?

- It’s not my fault hot people attract hot people.

- At least one of the mums at Sadie’s school.

- Nope.

- They’re always throwing themselves at you. Honestly, its your pick at this point.

- I can’t. They very respectfully throw themselves at me but they still think there’s a Mrs. Barnes.

- Sadie’s mum? - she almost sobered up at the thought. - Sadie’s mum has come by?

- No, not Sadie’s mum. You.

- I’m not Mrs. Barnes. Do they think I’m Mrs. Barnes?

- Wow. - he chuckled at her horrified face - Would it be such a bad thing to be Mrs. Barnes? There are worse fates.

- You’re not my type. - she almost snorted a laugh, hiding the sight of her lips behind the hammered glass of the tumbler.

Bucky leaned against the couch, looking her up and down without moving anything but his eyes. It was a sniper look if she’d ever seen one and although she was covered in oversized loungewear, she felt as if she stood stark naked in front of her boss. Her cheeks heated and she no longer knew if it was from the scotch in her system or from the look she was receiving from him. His motionless state changed as he moved like a feline, standing above her, close enough she could feel his breathe on her. She buried herself deeper into the couch, trying to avoid his eyes. Had his eyes always been this blue?

- I’m sure I could change your mind if I wanted. - he chuckled before returning to his seat. - What about you? You’re very curious about my love life, what about yours?

- I don’t have time.

- That I know. You’re always here, overtime with my daughter. Are there no postgraduate men vying for your attention? - he drank whatever was leftover of the amber liquid in the glass.

- I’m not that kind of girl. - she laughed, uncomfortable at the mention of her dating life. She was already ashamed of it, of what her love life looked like. There was no one tripping over themselves to date her. Perhaps it was merely because she didn’t know what it took to put oneselves out there, she didn’t like the superficiality of dating apps, somewhat still wanting a traditional meet cute, and when she wasn’t studying, she was looking after Sadie. Besides, she never was the centre of attention, so why would she be now? - I’m content.

- If I were 10 years younger, I’d be all over you. - he winked. - You need more time off.

- Who needs a boyfriend when I can be Mrs. Barnes apparently. - she rebutted, getting a laugh from him. - If apparently I am Mrs. Barnes, I think I’m gonna need a raise.

- You’re just making me lose out of on the chance to sleep with the school’s MILFs. You may need a pay cut, actually.

- I think you’ve had too much too drink. Another comment like that and they won’t let you near the school. - she let herself lean against the pillow, taking him in with a very drunken mind. James Barnes was gorgeous, he’d always been gorgeous but perhaps her sober self had never allowed herself to see him like this, see him as a sexual being or have less than appropriate thoughts about her boss.

She knew he was attractive, she knew everybody wanted him even if it was for a single night. She’d heard some of it ... by accident when Sadie was at school and he thought no one was home. She didn’t think much of it but now, as he stood there in dark joggers and a way too tight white t-shirt, those noises were all she could think of. What it would feel like to hear a man like that come undone, to be the reason a man like that came undone. She wondered what his fingers would feel against supple skin, the texture of his lips and tongue.

- Are you alright? - his voice luckily took her out of her depraved fantasy world. She shouldn’t be thinking of this, she shouldn’t think of him like that. He’s her boss, he’s Sadie’s dad. - I’m just joking around. I am not a man whore, Y/N.

- I know. - she swallowed the lump in her throat. - I, I really need to get to bed or Sadie will miss her playdate tomorrow.

- I should be going too. Work tomorrow.

- Ah ... - she looked around. - I’ll wait for you to say goodnight to Sadie tomorrow then? Or do you want her to go to sleep before you arrive?

- I’ll text you if I make it before bedtime.

- Okay. Hum ... goodnight, Sergeant Barnes.

(...)

It was official. She was depraved.

The 50 year old scotch made her a depraved individual. That had to be the reason she was twisting and turning around in her bed, her sheets no longer smooth instead tangled between her legs as her mind wandered further into the sexuality that her boss exuded. He was stuck in her mind, from the way his lips grazed the glass to how close he’d been to her. He’d been so close to her, close enough she could’ve kissed him if she wanted to. She was sure he was a good kisser. He looked like he was a good kisser.

She turned around of more, staring at the ceiling, trying to find something remotely interesting in the wide white of the ceiling. Instead, she wondered about what he was doing in his bedroom. She wondered if he was restless too, perhaps finding something more interesting to do with his time and like an annoying radio song, those moans were back in her memory. God, she wondered if he needed a woman with him to make those sounds. Wondered if he laid down at night, fantasising about the perfect woman, tugging at his cock. Oh god ...

- Stop it. - she mumbled to herself but that image was now stuck in her mind. The idea of his lips parted as he jerked off, moans leaving his mouth like any other fantasy.

That heat was back to her cheeks as her hand shyly descended, from her side to the hem of her shorts. She shouldn’t, she really shouldn’t and perhaps if she were sober she wouldn’t be doing it but at the mere memory of him, all inhibitions were out the window and her hand went under the shorts and her underwear. She reached between the heat in her legs, finding to no surprise that her colourful imagination made her wet. She let herself imagine what it would be like for him to touch her as she lazily circled her clit with her fingers, her other hand toying with her hardened nipple.

She could almost hear his voice in that state, whispering dirty words into her ear as she thrust a finger into her wanting heat, her palm rubbing against her bundle of nerves as she slowly fucked herself. She wondered if he’d put his hand around her throat, calling her all sorts of things and moaning against her ear.

- Sergeant Barnes ... - she moaned to herself, her head trashing around her pillow as she bit the fabric trying to suppress any noise from coming out.

She was done for, so done for.

(...)

- Oh my god! - she shrieked as she stepped away from the tub, receiving yet another splash of water which instead of ending up on the floor, hit her directly across her front.

The bathroom was steamed from the heat of the water, most of which now laid on the ground in puddles or soaked into her clothing. This never happened, or at least it didn’t usually happen. That’s what she gets for bathing an overexcited toddler. She looked down on herself, sighing before picking up the only dry towel in the bathroom and pulling Sadie out the bath before she turned the bathroom into her own private pool. She already had one of those, she didn’t need two.

- You’re gonna have to help me mop, huh? - she told the 2 year old as she dried her off and helped her into dry, clean pyjamas. - We can’t splash in the bath.

- Fun! - she merely replied with that smile that almost made her forgive everything. Almost.

She picked Sadie up, leaning her against her hip so she wouldn't trip on the wet tilled floor. That’s just what she needed for tonight, to spend it all moping the floors of the bathroom. Yet right now all she needed was to get Sadie fed and calm before she created any more danger. She would change after. It was just the two of them tonight and Bucky hadn’t shown any signs of showing up before bedtime which gave her plenty of time to get her ducks in a row.

At least that’s what she had thought until she stepped right into Bucky’s track as she made her way to the kitchen. Bucky stood there, almost made of stone as he took in what stood in front of him. His daughter was happily giggling, speaking about her playdate while Y/N was soaking wet, from head to toe. It was almost as if she wasn't wearing a shirt. The thin white material transparent and clinging to the pebbled nipples and outline of her breasts and if that wasn't enough, the wet white shorts gave him a front view of her red underwear.

He’d never felt like a perverted old man until now. Until the sight of this woman soaking wet made him wonder what she would look like completely naked. Suddenly, his trousers felt tighter around his crotch and he had to turn his head away. This was his child’s mother ... shit, his child’s babysitter. Whatever. This was inappropriate.

- I’m sorry. She splashed the whole bathroom.

What was he supposed to reply? He couldn’t look the woman in the eye without getting hard. Instead, he grabbed his daughter from her, taking a few steps back. A few which looked like a mile away.

- You may want to change, Y/N. - he cleared his throat.

- Oh ... - she looked down herself. Great. Now she was having inappropriate thoughts about her boss and prancing around in see through clothing. - I’m so sorry.

- Just go, Y/N. - he motioned towards the stairs, turning around to face the other side as she climbed up the stairs and away from his sight. Great, he was a perverted old man now.

- Daddy, you’re red. - Sadie piped up as he sat her down in her chair. - Angry?

- No, Sadie. I’m not angry.

- Sorry. - she apologised.

- Just don’t splash Miss Y/N, yeah? Makes things complicated for daddy.

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