#that gay ass little hair flip. the bisexual spread.

[theinfinitedivides]

explain to me how this man is tied up in a chair bloody af getting the sh*t beat out of him and still. still somehow he sits there and oozes so much sex appeal in his first proper on screen appearance in roughly five years i am yeeted back to the Don 2 days

[mrsaltieri-real]

Good Boy, Meeks (Mickey Altieri X Randy Meeks)

Words: 2.8k

Warning/s: language, smut, slight dom/sub dynamic, handjobs, blowjob, teasing, cum eating, cum play, filming/sex tape, hair pulling, Randy’s a nervous wreck, Mickey’s a teasing ass, implied stalking, frenemies to fuck buddies.

A/N: SO this is my first fic that is two canon characters. No reader insert, no OC. Just Mickey and Randy. The Film Bro’s™️. This was ridiculously fun to write, I’m definitely going to do stuff like this more often. I love them so much. Thank you @bisexual-horror-fan for beta reading and editing! You’re such a massive help dude!

I hope you guys enjoy reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it!

Mickey had always found Randy sweet.

In a lot of ways, they were the same. Film geeks with an unfiltered passion for cinema and the art surrounding it, constantly looking for a deeper meaning, both there and in real life. Then again, they were more different than similar.

Randy was a small town boy still reeling from the series of murders that rocked him a year back. He never showed it, but he lived in a constant state of unease, glancing over his shoulder and never letting anybody but Sidney in. Even then, he couldn’t talk to her about this stuff. She was healing, getting better. He was happy for her, but when she began dating Derek, he realized that he truly was all alone.

Mickey, on the other hand, was from the city. Eager, outgoing, confident. He wasn’t scared about people finding him arrogant or full of himself, he lived his life with no regrets. He was being bankrolled through college by Billy Loomis’ mother to help her finish the job he and Stu Macher couldn’t. Mickey was violent, in more ways than the obvious. His ambition made him all the more magnetic, especially to Randy.

They had a fun frenemy vibe going for a while, though they both knew it was more affectionate than anything. Mickey liked Randy, he thought he was simply adorable. Randy liked Mickey, he enjoyed arguing with him even though most of the time he knew he was just saying opposing views on cinema to get a rise out of him, like when he’d sat in front of him and blatantly said that Superman 2 was better than Superman 1. Randy could see the amusement in his eyes as he argued back, but decided to roll with it.

Anything to stretch out the conversation.

Randy wasn’t gay. He knew he wasn’t gay, he’d been in love with Sidney since before he even knew what love was. But sometimes, just sometimes, he’d glance over at Mickey in class or in the cafeteria, watch his head tip back as he laughed, the dimples in his cheeks. His eyes would drift to his strong, muscular arms, watch his huge hands run through his hair or drum against his thigh, and it was almost impossible to look away.

But no, he wasn’t gay, he wasn’t bi, he was straight. Right?

“Randy!” Fingers snapped in front of Randy’s face, and he blinked, shaking his head before his blue eyes tentatively met light brown. “You okay, man?”

“Fine, why?” Randy cleared his throat, adjusting himself in his seat and looking down at his paper. He and Mickey had been paired for a project on cinematography in horror, and it bugged Randy that the moment their names were spoken out one after the other by their professor, he’d felt his heart flutter a little.

“Well, I was talking to you and you were just… Staring at me.” Mickey’s tone was light, almost playful. He didn’t look away from Randy, his grin spreading wider as he saw the rush of colour flood to the boy's cheeks. How cute is that?

“Fuck off, Mickey, no I wasn’t.” Randy scoffed, shaking his head. “Stop fucking around, what were you saying?”

“C’mon, Meeks! Tell me what you were thinking about.” Mickey leaned forward in his own seat, his hand reaching out and playfully pushing Randy’s shoulder. Randy swatted at his hand, only making Mickey chuckle and hold his hands up in surrender. “Okay, okay!” He shook his head, still smiling as he grabbed his camera from his desk, flipping the small flap open and holding it up. “Don’t wanna tell me? Tell the camera.”

“Mickey, I swear to God, fuck off.” Randy held up his hand, turning his head to the side and burying his face into his shoulder. “You’re such an ass, dude.”

“Aw, I know.” Mickey didn’t drop the camera. His eyes were fixed on Randy through the tiny screen, his head tilting just slightly to the side. His smile had changed into a somewhat affectionate half smile, watching as Randy peeked up at him. “What?”

“You like me, don’t you?”

The question took him by such surprise, Randy let out a laugh that was a little too loud, a roll of his eyes that was a little too dramatic and stood to his feet, pushing the chair back a little too hard. Mickey watched the ordeal with an amused expression and a cocked brow, the camera still focused on Randy, “I think you’re a dick.”

“And I think that you think I’m blind and stupid.” Mickey retorted, finally looking up from the small screen, his eyes settling and Randy’s awkward stance. “It’s okay, I won’t tell anyone. I wouldn’t do that.”

Randy looked away, as he says, “I don’t like you. Not like that.”

Mickey presses, “Like what?”

“Like- Oh, shut up.” Randy muttered, beginning to walk toward Mickey’s bathroom.

Before he could get past him, Mickey’s large hand that Randy had so often admired shot out, wrapping around his forearm easily and holding him next to him.

“Don’t make it weird, Meeks. We can fuck if that’s what you want.”

Mickey said it so matter-of-factly it took Randy a little by surprise, his eyes shooting to Mickey, who still gripped the camera in his other hand, the band around his wrist and his arm resting beside him.

“But you’re not…” Randy’s voice trailed off and Mickey let out another laugh.

There is that infuriatingly dazzling smile as he asked, “I’m not what? Gay?”

Randy stumbles over his words as he responds, “I mean… Yeah. I’ve seen you with girls and stuff.”

“Yeah, so? What, you're a film major and think people can’t branch out a little?”

Randy frowned, this isn’t as simple as making a movie in a different genre, at least not to Randy. His eyes darting from Mickey’s hand wrapped around his arm and to his face. He couldn’t deny, when Mickey touched him, he felt an uncomfortably strong wave of arousal flow through his body and stab him straight in the stomach.

Fuck, he hated that Mickey made him feel this way. Fucking Mickey Altieri of all people. It was no surprise really, though. Randy had seen first hand, he could pretty much fuck anybody he wanted. He was outrageously attractive, magnetic and just downright charming. He couldn’t deny he was attracted to him, and had been for a pathetic amount of time. And now, here he was, telling him he wanted him.

Randy didn’t move, caught in a hesitating limbo, so Mickey helped him, tugging on his arm and pulling him in front of him.

He had no idea what he was doing. He’d thought about this, this moment more times than he cared to admit whilst he was fisting his cock in the shower, thinking of Mickey. His hands, his arms, his smile, his cock, and more often than not, his lips. He was always filled with guilt after, wondering how Mickey would feel if he knew that Randy touched himself to thoughts of him on his knees with Mickey in his mouth.

This was fucking unbearable.

Mickey’s brown eyes were fixed on Randy’s torn expression, watching the vast array of emotions pass over his face. Suddenly, it wasn’t so amusing.

“Nod if you want me.” Mickey said, his voice unnaturally soft and tender.

Randy’s final thought was simple.

Fuck it.

He nodded his head, eyes, watching as Mickey released his arm and gently palmed over himself. Randy hadn’t noticed before that he was already half hard. Did he know? This entire time that Randy wanted him this much? Did he want it as long as he did, too?

Mickey didn’t speak, but he stood to his feet, placing the still rolling camera down on his desk, the lenses facing them, a light smile on his lips as he leaned forward, his hand moving from his own aching bulge in favour of Randy’s. The two of them were wearing sweatpants, and Mickey smiled in satisfaction at how fucking hard Randy was for him. He could feel his heat, feel the throbbing before he even made contact.

Mickey’s other hand cradled Randy’s flushed cheek, finding it sweet how panicked Randy looked, as if he was afraid this was all some big joke to his expense. But this wasn’t, Mickey wanted Randy, had done since the first day the little geek challenged him in film class.

Randy found that focusing on the beauty spot just beside Mickey’s eyes calmed him down slightly, humanizing the other boy a little more.

Mickey wasn’t going to kiss Randy first, however. He felt like that was something Randy had to do, and it didn’t take him anywhere near as long as he expected.

The minute Mickey’s head ghosted over him, Randy bit the bullet, closing the space and pressing his lips against Mickey’s with a passion that took Mickey by surprise. Randy let out a shaking moan into his mouth, pushing himself greedily against Mickey’s hand in desperate need for friction, to which the other boy eagerly obliged, his hand moving to frail his fingers down Randy’s happy trail and slipping smoothly into Randy’s sweats and boxers, eagerly kissing him back as he did. Mickey tasted like mint, his lips were unbearably soft and something about them seemed like home, the rough feeling of Mickey’s stubble scratched against Randy’s face, so satisfying and just how he dreamed it would.

The moment Randy felt Mickey’s well worked hand wrap around his cock, he was worried he was going to cum then and there. His hips thrust a little as he gasped into Mickey’s mouth, feeling him smile against him as he did. Randy’s hands were fast and eager, but he was stopped sharply by Mickey, who pulled back, shaking his head.

“Oh, God I- I’m sorry, fuck, I-“

Randy began rambling, his face flushing a deep red. Mickey simply rolled his eyes, bending down to pull Randy’s sweats and boxers down before pulling his own shirt over his head, tossing it to the side. “Shut up, I thought it would be easier this way, no?”

This was the first time Randy had seen Mickey shirtless. He momentarily marvelled at the hairs on his chest, his toned stomach, and swallowed thickly.

Before Randy could reply, Mickey kissed him, deeper and with more vigour than last time. Randy’s leaking cock pressed between both of their stomachs. Mickey’s hands gripped Randy’s hips, pulling him even closer to him and forcing him to grind against him before he pressed him firmly up against the wall, his lips beginning to drift from Randy’s lips, to his jaw, to his throat.

“F-fuck.” Randy’s moan was unsteady, his hands unconsciously moving to knot in his thick dark hair, his hips beginning to grind against him by themselves. The friction felt incredible, but what felt even better was Mickey’s hand beginning to slowly pump Randy’s cock as he kissed his neck, the sensation making goosebumps rise on his skin.

Mickey used Randy’s pre-cum as lube as he allowed the boy to messily thrust against his hand, his simpering whimpers and moans fucking music to his ears.

“You have no idea how many times I’ve thought of you like this, Meeks.” Mickey breathed into Randy’s ear, twisting his hand expertly and relishing in the gentle whines flooding out from Randy’s lips. “A leaking fucking mess just for me.”

“Just for you.” Randy echoed Mickey’s words, his hands gripping his hair even tighter as his pace began to steadily increase.

The feeling of his rough hand gliding up and down his shaft, his messy cock aching and throbbing, it was nothing like he’d had before. His first and only time with Karen Kolcheck back in Woodsboro seemed pretty much laughable compared to how Mickey was making him feel right now with just his hand. Randy knew he was close, his balls were aching, and he could feel himself ready to unload all over Mickey’s stomach, but he didn’t want to. He knew that once he did, it would be over.

Fuck, he didn’t want this to be over.

“You gonna cum for me, Randy?” Mickey asked. Randy let out a soft whine, flinching in effort to avoid doing just that.

“N-no.” He groaned out, the grip on Mickey’s hair tightening.

Mickey let out a breathy laugh, his hand slowing to a gentle pump. “Why not?” He asked.

Randy didn’t answer, his head falling forward, so his forehead pressed against Mickey’s shoulder.

Mickey wasn’t having that. He pulled his hand away from Randy’s sloppy cock, knocking his arms out of the way so he could pull Randy’s head back before gripping his chin between his long fingers.

“Why not?” He asked again, his tone a little harder.

“Because I don’t want it to be done.” Randy blurted out. He felt Mickey cock twitch against his from the confines of his sweats and briefs and felt an overwhelming desire to touch him too. Mickey looked at the hungry expression on Randy’s face and smiled affectionately, releasing Randy’s jaw and sliding his hand into his hair.

“Okay, on your knees then.”

Before the words were completely out of Mickey’s mouth, Randy was on his knees, pulling down Mickey’s remaining clothes.

Randy had only seen his own dick and dicks in porn. No pornstar cock would ever compare to Mickey’s. The only word that came to mind was mouthwatering.

After Mickey spent a little time talking Randy through it, Randy took him greedily into his mouth, moaning at how delicious he tasted, his eyes fluttering closed.

“Fuckkkkk.” Mickey groaned, his head tipping back and one hand still resting on the top of his head. He glanced at the camera, picking it up and focusing it down on the adorable sight before him; Randy greedily sucking his cock as if his life fucking depended on it. Randy made a sound of disapproval at the sight of the camera, but Mickey shook his head. “Thought you might want to watch this back when you fuck yourself thinking about me.”

A brief thought of how the fuck does he know I do that? Crossed his mind for the briefest of moments before he forgot all about it, focusing on the feeling of Mickey’s thick, heavy cock in his mouth. He bobbed his head obediently, feeling Mickey begin to thrust harder, pushing his way down Randy’s throat.

“Yeah, good boy. Look up into the camera with my cock in your mouth, Meeks.” Mickey instructed, voice heavy and dripping with arousal. Randy did just that, feeling Mickey begin to twitch in his mouth as soon as he did. “Mm. You wanna get off?” He asked, smiling at Randy’s muffled yes. “Go on.”

Randy quickly took his own sensitive cock into his hand, realizing quickly his pre-cum had dropped onto Mickey’s hardwood floor. Mickey angled the camera, zooming in on the sight and watching it intently, his hips snapping against Randy’s face urgently.

“Fuck, I’m close.” Mickey grunted, halting his movement. Randy’s nose pressed against Mickey’s skin for a moment, beginning to splutter slightly as Mickey began to release hot ribbons of white down his throat, before pulling back to fill up Randy’s mouth.

The delicious taste, along with Mickey’s gorgeous expression, his head back and his chest heaving as he came, sent Randy into a convulsing mess, cumming all over his own hand, stomach and the ground beneath him. Mickey pulled out of his mouth quickly, relishing in the sound of Randy’s gasping moans as he finished.

It was silent between them for a moment, Randy trembling on his knees, not looking Mickey in the eyes. Mickey still had the camera rolling, looking fondly into the small window of it, before he glanced down at Randy pointedly.

“You made a mess, Meeks.”

Randy let out a sigh, relieved at the broken silence, before he asked, “What?”

Mickey nodded down beneath him at the cum staining the floor. Randy blushed, moving to shakily to stand up, only to be stopped by Mickey’s large, grounding hand.

“Clean it up.”

“I- I was going to. Was gonna get some paper towels and-“

“No, Randy.” Mickey cut him off, the cheeky smile back on his face as he knelt down in front of him. Mickey’s finger dipped into the impressive pool of white, before he raised it to his own mouth and licked it. Randy watched intently, his once softened cock twitching at the sight. Fuck.

“On your hands and knees-“ Mickey stopped, moving the camera and angling it down at the mess. “And clean. It. Up.”

Randy stared at Mickey for a moment, before nodding his head, and doing exactly what he was told.

He got on his hands and knees, dipping his head down, and began to lap up his own cum from the hardwood floor. Mickey watched through the camera, teeth sinking into his bottom lip at the sight.

“Good boy, Meeks.”

[writertothemaximum]

Summary: Fem!Niki fucks the shit out of Rinne at the beach.

Word Count: 2.2k

Warnings/Content: nsfw/18+, Niki x Rinne, Female Niki, Face-Sitting, Cunnilingus, Anal fingering, femdom

Notes: Normally I don't post character x character stuff on this blog, but as this is femdom, this is the one exception. I hope you guys enjoy!

Ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/33432565

Inspired by this pic [Please click!]

With a groan, Rinne drove the van down the sandy road, trying his best not to hit the small child that decided to walk in the middle of the road last second. It was going to be one of these days, wasn’t it?

First, Niki begs him to lunch, it’s the middle of summer and 400 degrees outside, and now she’s proceeded to drag him to the beach so she can ‘eat ice cream on the sand’ or whatever. And here Rinne thought he was the annoying one. She should get her license, it’s bad enough she didn’t graduate high school.

Well, at least she made sure he was well fed and…Well, well-fed.

In the other way.

She was always really forward about that. Or maybe it was him and his sluttiness spilled off onto her.

Yeah, it was probably his fault. He should stop getting stoned with strangers in the living room.

Although Rinne wasn’t like that. Like, aggressive like that.

Neither were any of the men he slept with.

It was scary, almost.

No, it was just scary. She was scary when she got horny.

She always got him so embarrassed, why did she have to take her sweet time with him? Well, it’s not like she could just fuck-and-dump, but still. He always busted it too quickly, far too fast for his liking. Maybe he should go back to just being gay.

Niki thought Rinne looked super sexy today. She supposed he always did, almost to an annoying degree. To the point where men would hit on him in the street and he’d take them home and Niki would be witness to some random dude fucking him on the couch. It was almost never girls for some reason.

Was he gay?

No, she and him fucked all the time, Niki was a girl, that wouldn’t make sense. Rinne was definitely bi, like 100% bisexual.

Ah, he was 100% a bottom, that was all.

Can’t get off without his ass—The absolute whore.

He liked getting called a whore, too, maybe he was also 100% masochist, too. That would make a lot of sense, actually, now that she thought about it some. The way he groaned when she slapped his ass, when she bit his nipple, when she chomped on his neck, nibbled on the tip of his dick—yeah she liked biting him a bit too much.

Well, it was a hot day and it was time for ice cream and sausages on the beach. A nice tan would be cool, too, she was getting a little too pale for her tastes.

He didn’t really ever hit on her, he just kinda let her fuck him. He never got that embarrassed when he was with his male partners. It was like Niki was different to him, somehow. Like he wanted to get teased. Like he was annoyed by it, but secretly, he begged for it.

He always ended up begging for it.

Parking in a non-parking spot, Rinne popped out of the van and opened the side door in the back, grabbing a yellow floatie, a big towel to lie down on, and some sunscreen for good measure.

“Rinne-kun! Did you get the picnic box?” she shouted, running to the back.

“No, because you’d fucking grab it out of my hands, anyways, dick,” he said, sniping back.

Niki held her hand up to punch him in the gut, when she realized.

“Yeah, I would do that,” she said, chuckling out a snort.

Niki climbed around the back of the van, not really caring that her ass was in view for everyone who walked by. Rinne, feeling slightly embarrassed for her, walked in front of the door to block the view.

“What?” she asked.

“I well your, uh,” he said, stumbling. “Your fat ass was falling out of the fucking car!”

She poked a finger out, booping him right in the nose.

“Lmao someone’s embarrassed,” she said, chuckling.

“Oh god, stop using texting lingo in public again,” Rinne said, walking off to the shore, giving up.

“Wait, wait, I know a good spot!” she said, shouting at him.

Niki’s ‘good spot’ was actually a very nice, secluded section of the beach. It took them about ten minutes to find, and they had to climb over a dozen or so rocks, but it ended up giving them some nice shade, and Rinne was never opposed to a good workout.

Rinne spread his arms out to the nice summer wind and took in the world around him, finally allowing the toxic fumes of arrogance and annoyance to leave his body, and breathe in the fresh air of confidence and being a massive dick again.

Niki poked him in the ass.

“Bitch!?” he shouted.

“Are you going to set up the towel or what?” she asked. “I have lunch to eat.”

That’s right, she had carried four lunchboxes over the rocks.

Four. Plus a full tub of Ben and Jerry’s.

“Do I get any this time?” Rinne asked, leaning in. He was a bit hungry, now that he mentioned it.

Niki put a finger to her mouth, the fabric handles of the bags falling down to her elbows.

“Hm,” she said, earnestly considering it. “Maybe if you suck me off.”

“Jesus fuck Niki. You’re horny too?” he said.

She pointed at him, accusatory.

“And you’re not? Who the fuck isn’t horny!?” she shouted.

Rinne sighed and rolled the towel out. He sat down, crossing his legs. He should have invited HiMERU or Eichi or Ibara, or really anyone he could irritate into fucking him. This was wrong, Rinne was supposed to be the tyrannical crazy one, why was Niki walking all over him? It was unacceptable, absolutely unacceptable.

The crashing waves really were relaxing. It was a good thing he had come in his bathing suit.

“Fine,” he said, crawling down on his hands and knees. Niki didn’t seem to hear him, taking a big scoop of sweet chocolate ice cream and dumping the thing directly into her mouth.

His nose pushed into the bottoms of her swimsuit, far too skimpy for any good-natured girl to wear. Tufts of her hair pushed against him, and Rinne wondered why she didn’t shave down there. Whatever, it was just a little hairy and it was about to get a lot wetter.

Niki recoiled in the softness of the towel when she felt shivers ride down her thighs. Rinne flicked his tongue across her clit, stirring up a small sound of approval. He had always been so good at this. Niki wondered if he was just as good at sucking cock. The whole thing felt so relaxing under the heat of the summer sun, she was melting, just absolutely melting.

“Fuck, Niki!” Rinne shouted, jumping up and wiping the glob of ice cream off his back. “Why’d you spill the shit on me?”

“Dunno,” she said, the spoon sticking out of her mouth. She grabbed his head by the puff of his hair and shoved him back into her crotch. “I didn’t tell you to stop. Don’t you want some ice cream?”

“Hanernangh,” was Rinne’s response, his nose suffocating in vaginal secretions.

Leaning back, she squashed Rinne’s head in her thighs, small tufts of red poking out from the little sandwich. Ooh, a sandwich, she should have taken one out of the picnic box, that would have tasted really good right about now.

The wet rubbing felt so good, so good to just squash him right there, struggle around for air, struggle around, knowing that he’d get something out of this, knowing that he’d get rewarded for all his hard work. It god Niki madly turned on knowing that Rinne was getting off to this. Knowing that he liked to get scrunched, to get manhandled.

Niki sat up.

“Hey, Rinne-kun, flip over,” she said.

“Hah? Do I get some now?” he said, snarling. “I wanna get some before you spill it all over me.”

“Turn the fuck over, idiot,” Niki snapped back.

“Fine,” Rinne sputtered out, flipping over to his back.

Niki immediately decided to sit down.

“Hanaefng!?” Rinne shouted, obviously surprised.

“Keep going and you’ll get some ice cream, sheesh,” she said.

Niki began to pat down Rinne’s body, feeling a bit of sand, and a really nice tan beginning to form. And wow, really nice abs, really nice, firm, strong abs. But that wasn’t what she was looking for.

“Aha!” she said, pulling the bottle out of his pocket and slightly raising her ass off his face. “So you did bring lube you fucking whore.”

Rinne took a huge gasp of air, finally able to breathe.

“Jesus fuck, and just what are you going to do with that? It’s not like I can suck you off and fuck you at the same time,” he said, crassly.

Niki, annoyed, sat back down.

“Who said you were going to be the one doing the fucking?” she said, irritated.

Rinne struggled a bit before shuffling his ass out for better access. She had fingered him before, maybe she should invest in a strap-on. Then he wouldn’t have any need to do all of those one-night stands. She could just fuck him on her cock.

“Ooh, someone’s hungry for fingers,” she said, mocking. “Wanna come here for a smoochy-smoochy? I think you deserve it, Rinne-kun!”

Rinne, not being able to speak due to still having pussy in his face, responded with a large groan.

“Or do you prefer these lips?” she asked, rubbing all of her secretions in his face. She wondered how it tasted. Salty, for sure.

Niki leaned forward, taking one last scoop of partially melted ice cream before setting it to the side on the towel. Wow, the heat felt great. The sun, the way the waves lined up, it all just filled her with elation.

So when she leaned her face down to his groin, it made her all the happier to see that Rinne was hard. He liked getting humiliated like this, didn’t he? Wow, what a masochist. When Niki tugged at the hem of his swim trunks, Rinne lifted his hips, allowing her to get them off quicker. Someone was excited. Well, a large glob of lube, a finger made its way to the entrance of his hole. She felt Rinne hesitate on her clit as she pushed in, a loud groan echoing through the rock cliffs.

He was so soft inside. He always was. It was like his ass was made for pleasure, made for this lovely squeeze, caressing her fingers in an absolutely perfect massage. He was always so loose, too, she supposed that’s what being a cock-whore did to someone.

Hm, well, speaking of cock, his dick was right there. He was pretty hard. Would be a shame if someone were to maybe…suck it?

In a moment, her lips were around the tip.

“Haarhrhah! Nik—Niki!” she heard, Rinne tilting his head off her ass.

Retaliating, she sat back down, crushing his head hard into the towel.

God, it was too much at once. With the two fingers pounding his ass, the suffocating aroma on his face, and now the condensing suction on his tip. He was going to cum, he was going to cum—

Niki gripped the bottom of his shaft hard, not letting a drop out.

“You’re supposed to get me off, first, asshole,” she said, her glare enough to kill a man.

Fuck, fuck, thoughts poured through Rinne’s mind as he licked her clit as fast as he could, desperately trying to get her off, trying to get himself off, he was too hard, too overwhelmed.

Rinne felt Niki convulse above him, her hole tightening up, clenching around pure nothing as she came on his face. Noises spewed out of her mouth as she couldn’t control herself, everything coming all at once.

And that’s when Niki finally let go of his dick.

Like the grossest milkshake in the world, Niki kept sucking.

Popping her head off in a moment, she gave off a sigh of relief, as if she had a nice big sip of coffee, drinking all the semen up like a fat noodle.

Niki unplugged her fingers from his ass and Rinne shoved her off, letting her laugh as she rolled off the towel and into the sand.

“That was fun,” she said, still unable to hold her laugh.

“Bitch! You got sand up my ass!” Rinne shouted, making a motion in the air to slap her, obviously missing.

“Your fault for being such an anal fiend,” she said, the heat of the sand proving to be very relaxing. Ooh, she was right next to the lunch box. Time for a sandwich.

“Can I get my ice cream now?” Rinne asked, like a petulant child.

“Yeah, go ahead,” she said, diving right into the lunch box.

Rinne picked up the abandoned tub of Ben & Jerry’s only to realize.

“It’s fucking melted!” Rinne shouted.

“Well, suck faster next time,” Niki said, taking a big bite of her sandwich.

“Well, maybe if someone ate better, her fucking cunt wouldn’t taste like that fucking sourdough starter you keep around the apartment,” Rinne said, snapping.

“Hey, you love my pussy, don’t joke with me,” she said, right back.

Rinne grimaced, embarrassed, knowing she was right.

Pouting, Rinne forced the spoon into the chocolate wonder, scooping it up and landing it right in his mouth. It wasn’t all melted.

Yup, ice cream was good. Ice cream was always good.

[displacedprincess]

Willpower || Elena & The Gargoyles

@carvedfromlivingstone

Backdated: January 19th

Summary: The gargoyles smell a change in Elena’s hormones, Elena weaponizes a loaf of bread and calls bullshit.

ELENA

“Felipe! Raf!” Elena called out, practically kicking the door open to Goliath’s. “Where are you bitches at? I’m gonna fight you!”

This, of course, was said in the same playful tone she used when she threatened to kick Naomi, Isa, or even Goliath’s ass. No asses would actually be kicked, however, her little gargoyle brothers absolutely owed her five quid or a Chippamunka’s milkshake each. 

“I told you that guy Maru was crushing on was gay!” Elena exclaimed, doing a little happy dance. “As a bisexual, my queerdar is spot on. I have been deciphering the sexuality of humans a lot longer than you kids have. You’re welcome.”

GOLIATH

As all of the gargoyles were currently in the kitchen, none of them saw her come in. They all certainly heard her, and Goliath simply grinned as Raf and Felipe both groaned. 

“Bite me, princess, we already agreed he was probably gay,” Felipe yelled back, grabbing an orange slice and preparing to throw it at the older girl when she came around the corner. Cesar reached over and snatched it up first, tossing it in his mouth while giving the younger gargoyle a look that said ‘Don’t you dare’.

“But that’s good to have it confirmed, right Maru?” Raf said. Ever the peacekeeper, that one. Maru, of course, had his face practically glued to the screen of his laptop and had missed all of this.

“You’re just in time, joya,” Goliath called out. “Lunch is almost ready.” He gave her a smile as his daughter stepped into the room, leaning in to press a kiss to the top of her head in greeting.

He stopped midkiss, eyebrows furrowed.

Wait. He couldn’t possibly- she wasn’t- was his nose on the fritz? Was this a side effect of aging?

Cesar had caught his bewildered look and Goliath motioned down to Elena with his eyes. ‘Smell her’ he mouthed. It’d be good to have confirmation.

“Oi, no greeting for me?” Cesar grumped while giving Goliath a subtle nod.

ELENA

Elena grinned at the gargoyle she now affectionately (teasingly) called abuelito when he was acting particularly like an old man, and launched herself at him. “I could never leave you out, Cesar!”

The princess was, of course, oblivious to the eye conversation going on about her. 

“Papá, what’s for lunch?” She asked as she pulled away from Cesar. 

GOLIATH

With her attention diverted, Cesar sniffed at the princess’s hair and gave Goliath a similar wide-eyed look to the one he’d been wearing not a moment before. Shit. It wasn’t just him.

Felipe had picked up on the two elder gargoyles eyeing each other and gave them both a questioning look. Cesar dismissed him with a wave of his hand while Goliath kept Elena distracted.

“Aggressively Scottish food, I promise you’ll hate it,” he joked. Just act like everything was normal, Goliath. Be cool.

“Princess, come sit by me and we can throw stuff at Maru until he looks up and you can tell him about his crush,” Felipe ordered, pulling out the bar stool for her and ignoring Cesar and Goliath’s glares. When Elena got close, he ruffled her hair up just enough to be annoying and so he could smell her over the cooking food without getting too close. 

His eyes also flew open and he looked back at Goliath and Cesar, mouth falling open. They silently told him to shut his trap.

ELENA

“Ooh, sounds fun! I never realized how fun having three little brothers would be.” God, fucking with the boy’s was the best. Thinking nothing of Felipe’s request, she sat next to him and began to peel an orange to throw slices at Maru. 

She shot Felipe a glare as he messed up her hair, only half as annoyed as she looked, then tossed a slice into her mouth. Only to immediately spit it out. 

“Ick! Aw, man! Every orange I try to eat lately is nasty.”

GOLIATH

"Just recently, huh?" Felipe asked, and Cesar kicked him under the table hard enough that the younger gargoyle went stiff to try and keep in his yelp of pain.

Raf had seen all of this go down, and while the curiosity was killing him, he didn't want to get too into Elena's space. While Elena was distracted with trying to distract Maru, Raf looked at Goliath meaningfully and pointed to Elena under the table before gesturing with his open hands. The universal sign for 'What's wrong with Elena?'

Goliath turned so his back was to Elena and his side was just in view of Raf, appearing to be checking on the food cooking away. But instead he was tapping a hand against his lower stomach with wide eyes. Raf's eyebrows furrowed in confusion. She's…. Hungry?

ELENA

“Moon Market must not be able to get good batches in right now.” Elena added, pouting. She did so love oranges.

Not to be dissuaded from distracting Maru, however, Elena quickly stood up and scurried over to him. She threw her arm around his shoulder and put on the greatest show of her life. 

She gasped, horrified, and pointed to his screen. “Maru! I am scandalized. I’ve been in a German dungeon, and that is not what they look like.”

GOLIATH

Maru had actually been working on a program he'd been tinkering with. It wasn't much, but he was hoping to set up something that could be used to keep the remaining gargoyle clans around the world in contact so long as they had access to the internet (and these days, who didn't?). He had not been paying attention to the silent conversations going on around him, to the rest of clan bouncing Elena around like a scented teddy bear.

He was not aware there was anything to hide.

Which was why when she shocked him out of his trance and he took a sharp breath to snap at her for being a brat, he stopped, sniffed again, and said blunty "Why do you smell pregnant?"

"Elena's pregnant!?" Raf gasped as Felipe and Cesar both smacked their foreheads with their open palms. Goliath looked like he wanted to dangle Maru and Raf both off his roof by their ankles. While the sun was up.

ELENA

Maru’s quip shocked Elena into genuinely gasping, dumbstruck at the notion that she would ever be-- 

“Oye pendejo!” She shouted, picked up a loaf of bread in its little bread plastic and, wielding it like a club, smacked him with it repeatedly.  “I’m going! To kick! Your ass! If you ever! Spread some bullshit like that around! Understand!?”

She beat him a few more times with the bread for good measure before tossing it in Felipe’s general direction. “Goliath, you need to buy bread.”

GOLIATH

Well, life with Elena was certainly never boring. She even managed to catch Cesar and Goliath off-guard, and that was nearly impossible.

"Oi- hey!" Maru yelled, ducking and covering his head. "Stop hitting me you crazy princess!" he barked in Gaelic, wishing more than ever he had his wings to protect him. Raf was the one who rushed around to stop her, grabbing her hands and gently pulling her away. He was the last one to get a sniff of her, and he could recognize the weird smell of a woman who's hormones were all over the place. There had been enough human women at the castle when he was growing up that even he could recognize the smell.

He looked at Goliath, panicked, which was when their dad finally stepped in. "Don't beat your brother with a loaf of bread, Elena," he said, though his voice was a little too soft to be properly scolding. "What Maru means is your scent is… different."

ELENA

Elena was not finished with Maru, oh-ho-ho, no. For saying something as idiotic as why do you smell pregnant, Maru deserved a proper ass beating. How can he say that!? After the pregnancy scare she had while Mateo was in the underworld that she never told anybody but Naomi and Goliath and Mateo about, that Maru’s ignorance of if entirely his own fault, that he should definitely know about despite Elena never telling him, how could he say that?

“Let me at him before I bite your hands off, Rafinha!” Elena growled in very colloquial Avaloran Portunhol, reverting to her truest native tongue in her rage.

At Goliath speaking up, Elena stopped struggling against Raf and looked over her shoulder at Goliath. “Previously unsaid sentences in human history.”

She flipped her hair over her shoulder and crossed her arms over her chest, glaring hard at Maru before she turned to properly face the rest of the clan, rolling her eyes. Pregnant. Seriously, Maru? 

“Yeah, well, that’s not a very funny joke. Especially after Halloween before last.”

GOLIATH

“What happened the Halloween befo-” Felipe started, but Goliath silenced him with a wave of his hand. He did know what had happened, and knew how frighted Elena had been. 

This was… not going to be a fun week for anyone.

“Mija,” he said gently, taking one of her hands from where they were crossed together and holding it in both of his own. “I think we need to see your doctor.”

Six out of six gargoyles agreeing was all the confirmation Goliath needed, but Elena needed a human doctor as well.

ELENA

Elena was not pregnant. She refused to be pregnant, and therefore she wasn’t. The great pregnancy scare of 2018 took any last shred of ‘I will tolerate pregnancy’ out of her. So, no. Her fatigue, nausea, and super light periods that were absolutely periods and not spotting, did not mean she was pregnant. Because she couldn’t be pregnant. Because she refused to be. Therefore, she wasn’t.

She stared at Goliath with a look of betrayal, because how dare he entertain that she would possibly be- and she just stared at him for a long moment before she shook her head and laughed.

“Gargoyles have a crazy sense of humor, this really isn’t funny. No, nope, I’m not. I’m not pregnant, I’m on birth control.” That she doesn’t ever remember to take. “And Mateo uses condoms.” Usually.

“I’m not stupid.” Elena insisted. “I’m not stupid.”

GOLIATH

No, she wasn’t. But she was pregnant.

Felipe opened his mouth, but this time it was Cesar who glared him quiet. Unfortunately, Maru was out of range. “Six gargoyles smell baby on you, yes you are,” he said, still annoyed to have had his work interrupted. Raf leaned over and punched him - hard - in the shoulder. “What the hell-christ!?”

“He means pregnant, not stupid, by the way,” Raf added, trying to help and failing. “You’re not stupid.”

The look Goliath gave them all was unimpressed to the highest degree. “Okay, none of you are allowed to talk anymore,” he told them as he gently ushered Elena to the living room, away from the rest of their tactless family. He sat on the couch and nudged Elena down next to him.

“I wouldn’t joke about this,” he said softly.

ELENA

Elena sat next to him only because she was twenty-five years old, which was far too old to petulantly refuse. One could also say it is too old to beat your brother with a loaf of bread, but Maru had had it coming.

She shook her head, she’d deny this even if it killed her. “I’m not pregnant, I can’t be. I refuse to be, and if my body betrays me like that right now I’ll - well, I can’t death threat my own body, can I? The same energy remains though.”

She pulled her legs up onto the couch and wrapped her arms around her knees. 

“I don’t want to be pregnant, so I’m not.”

GOLIATH

That’s really not how it worked.

Goliath could only exhale long and slow through his nose, rubbing Elena’s back gently. “Then go to the doctor and prove us wrong,” he offered. “I’ll go with you and you can rub it in my face immediately if you’re right.”

If Goliath was right - and he was - then he’d be on hand to comfort his daughter. 

ELENA

Elena really didn’t see why they were sooooooo sure she was pregnant. Like...she was a human! Maybe they got the scent markers all mixed up because they’re different species. 

Yes, yes that was it. 

But you know what, fine. She’d humor her old man and the rest of the gargoyle clan, and go to the doctor. And prove them wrong. 

“Fine.” Elena held up her hands in surrender. “It’s okay, I can go by myself. If I’m pregnant — which I’m not — you don’t want to be the person who came with me to find out.”

She checked her Apple Watch and sighed. “If I leave now I’ll have time.”

GOLIATH

Actually, he did want to be there, because he knew Elena’s reaction wouldn’t be a calm one, but he also wouldn’t pressure her. Instead, he leaned in to kiss her forehead and stroke back her hair. “That’s my girl,” he said warmly. “I’ll pack some food for you to eat on the way. And text me later, alright? I’d say call, but I’m probably going to be busy kicking some sense into your brothers so I may not reply.”

(If Goliath heard a hissed ‘Shit’ and three sets of footsteps bolting out the kitchen door as softly as possible while Cesar snerked, then he didn’t point it out.)

ELENA

She nodded, now a little concerned that maybe Goliath was right. Wait, what? No, don’t think like that Elena. Will it away, will it away. 

“Yeah, I’ll— I’ll text you when I get the good news.” That she’s not! Pregnant! That her uterus is STILL not on the market!

Elena stood up and before Goliath did, turned on her heel to kiss him on the cheek. “Te quiero, Papá.”

[purplebenjy]

1997-Part One

It’s summer, Benjy’s at the skatepark, and he hasn’t been in a fight for over 48 hours. All in all, it’s shaping up to be a pretty decent day. 

The sun makes the hair on the back of his neck warm. When Benjy works on scooping it all up into a ponytail, his skateboard propped up by his foot, he catches the eye of his friend Ollie and grins at him over the half pipe. They’d met out here a few weeks ago, and there was something about him that made him different from Benjy’s other friends, though he couldn’t put his finger on it. After his hair is out of the way, he glides over, stopping inches away from his friend.

“Fall on your face yet today, fucker?” 

Ollie rolls his eyes. “No I gotta keep my face pristine for your mom to sit on.”

“Fuck you, dude. My mom has taste.”

Benjy laughs and shoves his shoulder, forgetting he’s on wheels and almost falling over in the process. 

“Fuck.” Benjy catches himself and steps off, worn out red vans securely on the concrete. He scratches at the sunburn on the back of his neck, his hair and the scratchy fabric of one of his dad’s old flannel shirts irritating it.

“You okay?” Ollie’s voice has gotten softer as he looks Benjy over, and something about the shift makes Benjy’s heart beat faster. He laughs, though it’s a bit higher pitched than it was a second ago.

“Yeah. Why wouldn’t I be?”

Ollie gives Benjy a half smile as he steps off his board, holding it with his foot. 

“Benjy-”

“You two fuck yet or what?” 

Benjy feels his jaw set, knowing the voice before he turns around. Dave. He’d been a year behind Mack in school and, according to his sister at least, had always had a Thing for her. 

And he seemed to have a Thing for Benjy too, though this particular thing seemed to be to make Benjy’s life a living hell. He was backed, as always, by his bigger and stupider friend who went by Tito--though Benjy was pretty sure his name was Melvin.

Benjy raises himself to his not at all impressive full height, glaring up at Dave in a way he hopes is at least sort of intimidating. 

“Why, Kesler? You wanna watch if we do?”

He hears Ollie laugh beside him, and Benjy’s knuckles crack as he forms a fist. There’s a few other groups at the park, but they’re far enough away and too caught up in their own bullshit for Dave shenanigans. They all treated Dave the way Dave treated Benjy, so at least, even if it wasn’t going to be a fair fight, it would be two on two.

“Do I look like f*ggot to you, Fenwick?”

“I don’t know, you look like the kind of bitch Tito would like-”

Being ready for the punch doesn’t make it hurt any less, but Benjy’s more than familiar with the stinging sensation behind his eye. Quickly, viciously, he lands three blows in rapid succession to Dave’s mid section, followed by a swift knee to his stomach. The victory of Dave crumpling to the pavement is short lived as Tito approaches. He’s easily twice Benjy’s size. Benjy laughs, hoping his fear isn’t obvious in his voice.

“You hit like a bitch too?”

Tito, in fact, doesn’t hit like a bitch, he hits like fucking Rocky Balboa. The force of it knocks Benjy backwards, and the taste of blood fills his mouth along with something sharp. He catches himself, doubled over, and spits without thinking. He stares at his own tooth on the concrete instead of trying to stand.

“Don’t take another step, motherfucker.”

For a second, Benjy thinks this is directed at him.

“Okay-”

When he finally glances up, Ollie has an impressively large butterfly knife pointed very close to Tito’s throat. Tito looks something other than menacing, so Benjy’s going to take that as a sign of fear. Dave’s back on his feet, glowering at Benjy but eyeing the knife warily.

“What are you gonna do, cocksucker? Stab us?”

“I might.” 

Something like admiration fills Benjy as he gathers himself and stands next to Ollie and his big fucking knife. He tilts his chin up, more blood seeps into his mouth.

“You wanna find out?” Ollie’s voice is soft again, but it’s different now. Darker. Scary. A thrill shoots through Benjy despite everything when he glances over at Ollie. He might actually fucking stab one of them.

“It’s not worth it, man.” Tito says, in what has to be the second time Benjy has heard him speak in almost six months of this fuckery. He spits at them before turning and walking towards his dropped board, skating away before Dave can say anything.

“You want a taste, Davey?” Benjy asks, his voice a bit more nasal than it should be on account what he’s fairly sure is a broken nose. 

“Fuck you qu---s” Dave snarls, though a bruise is already forming on the side of his face from where he’d hit the ground

“You wish, baby.” Benjy shouts after him as Dave flips them off and skates after Tito.

As soon as they’re out of sight, Benjy feels his knees start to give.

“Shit-”

Before he can say anything else, Ollie, who was at least six inches taller than him if not more, has already roped Benjy’s arm around his neck, supporting him.

“You need to sit down, come on.”

The skatepark is at the end of a block, facing the back of a few random chain restaraunts and the little mom and pop connivence store. There’s an alley sandwiched between the McDonalds and the Starbucks that’s littered with junkies during the night, but almost always abandoned during the day. Ollie leads Benjy to a bench beside an cigarette waste bin and sets him down gently, making sure Benjy is situated before sitting himself. 

“How fucked up do I look?” 

Ollie puts his fingers up as if he’s framing Benjy, appraising him.

“Only slightly more.”

“That’s a relief.”

His jaw was pulsing now. He’d lost a fucking tooth. His mom and Curt were going to be so pissed at him.

“The big fucker knocked one of my teeth out. Is it obvious?”

He grins manically at Ollie, who laughs. 

“Only if you’re looking at your teeth.”

Benjy groans,  hunching over and covering his face with his hands dramatically.

“You’re still cute though.”

Ice water manifests and runs down his spine as he sits up straight. He spreads his fingers and peaks at Ollie. His face is about as red as his t-shirt, the strawberry in the blonde of his hair becoming more obvious with his blush. Benjy’s mouth is so dry he’s surprised he can even speak.

“What?!”

“I mean-I don’t think you’re cute or anything like that I’m not gay or anything I was just trying to make a fucking joke or something man, I don’t know, it was stupid-”

“Ollie.”

Benjy drops his hands and smiles softly, ignoring the pain even that movement causes him. 

“-Yeah?”

“Shut the fuck up and kiss me.” 

Ollie’s lips are tentative against his, but firm. His hand cups the side of Benjy’s face with the least amount of cuts and he lets out a sigh as his kiss grows bolder. More eager. It’s way different than kissing any of the girls he’d kissed-Benjy had only found out three months about what ‘bisexual’ meant and with Ollie’s lips on his, all of the comparative differences in their friendship make sense. Such as, Benjy had probably no other friends he’d bite the bottom lip of. No other friends whose arms would make their way down his back to grip just above the curve of his ass. No other friends to pull away from him, breathless and giggly, before going back in for one more chaste kiss.

“I uh, don’t want to break your face any more than it is.”

Benjy takes Ollie’s hand and rubs his thumb across the back of it. It’s easy, being like this with him. Almost easier than being with any of his previous girlfriends, cause he already knew a lot about Ollie. Plus they had shared interests, like skateboarding and kissing each other-it only makes sense that it’d be easier with someone who has so much in common with him.

The kissing grows almost feverish and they only come up for air when Benjy cries out “ow!”

“What’d I do, What’d I do?” 

“You just hit my nose.”

Ollie grimaces, running a hand through his short buzzed hair. 

“My dad is still at work for the next few hours. I could uh, patch you up at my place?”

Benjy grins.

“What, like a date?”

Ollie shrugs. “Well I mean...yeah.”

Benjy nods once, his face sliding into neutral. 

“I mean, I’d love to, but you know, there’s the moral dilemma at play.”

Ollie looks so crestfallen Benjy almost wants to ruin it a second early just to get his smile back.

“What’d you mean?”

“Well if you’re also fucking my mother, as you’ve said hundreds of times before-”

Ollie laughs and shoves at Benjy playfully.

“You’re such an asshole.”

“Mmm, but you like it. I would love to come over.”

Ollie stands and pulls him to his feet. Their hands linger together before Ollie pulls away, not wanting to be spotted and add more fuel to the fire. Except now, the fire that Dave had been so sure existed, was very much real. Benjy leans up for a quick kiss. Incidentally, Ollie tastes vaguely of cinnamon gum.

“Hey Ollie?”

He says softly before dropping his hand, walking a pace behind his friend so it didn’t look as obvious. Though based on where they were, if anyone saw they’d probably just assume the two of them were after a fix that couldn’t be solved by your first incredible kiss with your first boy. 

“Yeah?”

“Thanks for kissing me. And thanks for having a knife.”

[windfighter]

For the @iron-man-bingo, square: Coming out

Fandom: Marvel, Avengers Characters: Tony Stark, Steve Rogers, Bucky Barnes, Loki, Peter Parker, Rhodey, Howard Stark Tags: Howard Stark's A+ Parenting, Homophobia, Coming Out, Trans Character, Trans Peter Parker, Asexual Character, Bisexual Character, 5+1 Things, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Tony Stark Is a Good Bro                            Words: 1764

Summary:

Tony is perhaps not the first you'd trust with your innermost secrets, but five times people did it anyway. And one time Tony tried to trust someone with his.

— 

Trustworthy wasn't usually a word used to describe Tony Stark. During bad days it made him sad, all other days it was understandable. Because who in their right mind would trust Mr ”I am Iron Man” to keep a secret? Even before the Iron Man spectacle Tony had a habit of speaking first and thinking later, a result of his brain working too fast for him to keep up. That's why it always surprised him whenever someone would entrust him with a secret.

#1

MIT. Tony and Rhodey where leaning over their books to study. Rhodey closed his books and let out a frustrated groan.

”Sometimes I miss high school. Stuff were simpler back then.”

”I'm just happy the teachers are finally at my level.”

Rhodey threw a pillow at Tony and laughed.

”You are so stupidly confident. How do you not have more friends?”

Tony grimaced.

”How about you? How are you not Mr. Popular?”

”I'm friends with you.”

Rhodey opened his book again, but mostly ignored it.

”And it's just... when people get close they always try to fix me.”

”Fix?”

”Never mind”, Rhodey tried to laugh.

”No, I want to know so I can kick their asses if it ever happens again.”

Rhodey actually snorted at that.

”Sure shortie, good luck with that.”

”I'm not that short! Wait, don't change the subject!”

”It's just that when people realize I'm not interested in hooking up or getting into relationships...”

Tony kept his face neutral, tried to not let his surprise at Rhodey actually sticking to the subject show.

”You're ace”, he said.

”How do you even know that word?”

”I know everything”, Tony shrugged. ”You're ace and people are stupidheads about it because they don't understand?”

”But you do?”

Tony shrugged again.

”Not completely, but enough to know there's nothing to fix.

He closed his book, grabbed the next one and shot Rhodey a smiled.

”Don't worry, your secret is safe with me.”

”I'll be haunting your ass otherwise.”

”It's a fine ass to haunt.”

Tony handed Steve a drink and sat down in the armchair next to him. Steve starerd at the alcohol.

”You know I can't get drunk, right?”

”Did the serum also kill your tastebuds?”

”Touché.”

They raised their glasses, clinked them together and sipped their drinks. Tony glanced at Steve, at this person who had just recently woken up to a new world and was obviously still grieving the loss of the past.

”What do you miss the most?” Tony asked, not expecting an answer because there wasn't a reason for Steve to trust him yet, especially not if he had heard what S.H.I.E.L.D or the media had to say about him. Steve smiled sadly towards the glass.

”Bucky”, he didn't even hesitate. ”Bucky was great, he was always there for me, from the moment we met. Bucky was...” Steve took a shaky breath. ”Whenever I was with him I was home. I... I miss him so much.”

Steve's eyes glittered and Tony patted his shoulder.

”I'm sorry.”

”It's not your fault, I just... I loved him and I never got to tell him. Not like I loved Peggy, but...”

Tony tensed his muscles to avoid squirming in the seat.

”How did you love Peggy?”

”She was so pretty and strong and her lips were so full and I couldn't stop wondering how it would feel to kiss them and...”

Tony coughed, choked on his drink. Steve hit him in the back to help but Tony waved him off.

”Sorry, it's just... Hearing someone talk like that about aunt Peggy is weird.”

”Oh”, Steve blushed. ”I'm sorry, I didn't know.”

”I was the one who asked”, Tony sipped on his drink. ”Anyway so you're bi?”

”...what?”

”Bisexual. Attracted to more than one gender. It's okay now, in case no one told you.”

”I'm... not?”

”You wouldn't want to tap this?” Tony gestured at himself and Steve's blush got bright again.

”No! I loved Bucky and all but I never wanted to do him!”

”Biromantic then”, Tony shrugged. ”It's okay, I won't tell anyone.”

”I don't even know what that means.”

”The internet is there, look it up.”

Tony put his empty glass on the table, got up from the couch and patted Steve's shoulder before leaving. As he was headed down for breakfast the next day Steve caught him, tablet clutched to his chest.

”So I guess I am”, Steve said.

”What?” Tony wasn't awake enough to deal with confused avengers.

”Biromantic. You were right. Don't tell anyone.”

”Your secret is safe with me.”

”I'll go Captain America on your ass otherwise.”

#3

Bucky was sitting on a desk in Tony's workshop while Tony was working on his arm. Sam was on the other side of the door making funny faces at Bucky and Bucky flipped him off, yelled at him in Russian. Sam made another funny face before laughing and leaving so Bucky would stop moving as Tony tried to work. Bucky let out a sigh as he watched Sam leave.

”Fuck, I am so gay.”

”Everyone's a little gay nowadays.”

Bucky froze.

”Shit, did I say that out loud?”

”You did”, Tony laughed. ”Don't worry, your secret is safe with me.”

”It better be or I'll set the Winter Soldier on your ass.

”At least one of you want to tap it”, Tony laughed.

#4

There was a woman sitting in the bar. She had raven black hair, piercing green eyes and was dressed in a black, green and gold armor, a green cape draped over her shoulders.

”Anthony”, she smiled. ”I came for that drink you offered.”

”Loki”, Tony nodded to her as he realized who she was. ”Now that I'm not here to threaten you I can say you look good.”

”You are not surprised?”

”I stopped being surprised a long time ago.”

Tony poured two drinks and handed her one. They sat down in the couch together and sipped on them.

”So you're genderfluid.”

”Is that what you Midgardians call it?”

”Must be nice to be able to change like that.”

”Magic is useful in some cases”, her hands glowed green. ”Do you wish to try?”

”Nah. Screw gender, but I'm happy as I am.”

They kept drinking, Tony refilled their glasses and Loki looked through the window, her eyes far away.

”Brother believes it's just another tool I use to further my agenda. At times it saddens me.”

”Should I talk to him?”

”It is way past the time for talking, but I must thank you for your offer. Most would not.”

”No worries then, Reindeer games. Your secret is safe with me.”

Loki smirked.

”I certainly hope so. If not there would be some light stabbing of your arse in the future and it would be a shame for that to happen.”

#5

Tony was watching Peter as he worked. The kid's movements were stiff and unusually awkward. He left his own workplace and went over to Peter's.

”Hey kid, something on your mind?”

”Ah!” Peter startled, dropped the tool he had been working with. ”M... Mr Stark! Hey! It's nothing, I just...”

”I'm here if you ever need to talk.”

”I'm uh”, Peter squirmed in the seat. ”I'm trans. Thought you deserved to know.”

Peter grabbed the tool and returned to working on his webshooters. Tony sat down on the desk.

”Hey, Pete, look at me.”

”Please don't hate me?”

”Why would I hate you? You're still Pete, right? Please don't tell me you've had me misgendering you this whole time.”

”Still... still Peter.”

”Okay, good. Next order of business: No one deserves to know your secrets. Okay? You decide when and if to entrust them to people. No matter what they do for you there is never, at no point, a time when they get to know your secrets if you're not ready for it.”

”Okay. I'm sorry, Mr Stark, I do trust you.”

”Makes me happy to hear. And thanks for telling me, I can make the suits safer for you now.”

Tony went back to his own workbench, pulled up the schematics for the next spidersuit. He glanced at Peter.

”Who else knows?”

”Uhm... Aunt May, Ned and MJ. And Flash.”

”The kid who bullies you?”

”He knew me before”, Peter shrugged. ”He's actually nice about it? For a bully I mean.”

”Okay, I get it”, Tony laughed. ”Don't worry kid, your secret is safe with me.”

”I... I know”, Peter smiled, then turned his chair around to look at Tony. ”Mr Stark, do you have any secrets?”

Tony took a shaky breath, then smiled towards the kid.

”Nope, I'm an open book.”

Peter laughed and they both went back to work.

#+1

Tony knew the importance of secrets, because he had let his own spill once when he was younger. He had gotten home from a day at the library, jittery in a way he had never been before. He went to the workshop, full of enegy that he needed to divert into something, preferable another invention. Howard was there, nodded at him. Tony tried to contain his happiness, so he'd be less obnoxious for Howard. Of course Howard missed nothing.

”What has you so happy, boy?”

”I met this guy at the library”, Tony couldn't stop himself. ”He was really cute and almost as smart as I am so we could actually hold a conversation, it was amazing! I'm... I'm meeting him again next week.”

Tony smiled, blushed and focused on the items spread out on his desk. Howard was next to him, his open hand collided with Tony's cheek and Tony stumbled. It stung and Tony's eyes widened.

”D-dad?”

”No son of mine is allowed to be a fag.”

Tony hadn't planned to ever come out to Howard, to let his secret spill, but he would not accept being called a fag when he wasn't one.

”I'm not! I'm not gay! I'm bi, it's not the same thing!”

Howard slapped Tony again. Tony stumbled and fell to the floor.

”You will not let anyone else know, ever. Is that understood?”

Tony didn't answer and Howard kicked him in the side.

”Is that understood?”

”Y... yes sir.”

”And you will not meet this boy again either.”

Tony didn't answer this time either and Howard stomped on his chest.

”Is that understood?”

”Yes... sir...”

”Good.”

Howard grabbed Tony's collar, dragged him out of the workshop and left him on the floor. As he returned and locked the doors to keep Tony out, Tony decided to never spill a secret again.

— 

[whoacanada]

‘Hot Jock Contest’

2k of date night auctions, shenanigans, and awkward first meetings. A Zimbits AU where Jack never overdosed and Bitty’s gay self is comfortable with being auctioned off for charity.

Rating: Teen, no explicit anything (not this time, lol)

(100% based off an ad I saw in passing for the Chicago Gay Hockey Association’s ‘Hot Jock Contest’.)

Jack rereads the email and fights a tightness in his throat at the image attached.

“Gay men’s hockey club is holding some kind of striptease disguised as a fundraiser. It’s the perfect place for you to spread your bisexual wings. You’ll get to see cocks in jocks, Jack. The kind you can actually look at, and, hopefully, touch.”

“Parse, I don’t know if that’s the kind of image I’m supposed to be cultivating, you know?”

Jack is eight months out of the closet and still horribly, desperately single; a fact made even less palatable by his ex trying to get him laid from a thousand miles away.

“Okay, that excuse worked until you got so backed up it started affecting your game. Look, at some point you have to make yourself happy, right? Coming out is supposed to be liberating and you’ve been wallowing in your freedom because people knowing you like dick doesn’t change the fact you’re still real fucking awkward, bud.”

“Thank you for the pep talk, Kent.”

“No, I mean,” Kent huffs like he’s the one suffering through this conversation. “Go out, have fun, get laid. And take Tater, he’s a good wingman.”

Ultimately, Jack folds like a cheap suit and finds himself in clothing that is far too tight, sipping on a craft beer that is too sweet, in a loud club full of beautiful people doing questionable things.

Jack doesn’t belong here.

“I still don’t think this is --”

“Zimmboni, relax! We find you cute boy tonight, no problem at all. How about that one? Nice legs? Nice face? Look good in your bed, ah?”

“Easy,” Jack throws his teammate a warning look at tries to focus on the parade of scantily clad hockey players looping the stage. “It’s not a meat market.”

Tater snorts. “Is always meat market. Just usually you are meat on ice.”

A beefy defenseman in a blue jock and matching harness stops in Jack’s line of sight and cocks a hip to display his bare backside and the tattoo of puck on his left ass cheek. Tater whistles and earns himself a wink.

“You’re not gay,” Jack chides.

“No, but I appreciate good physique.”

The lighting changes up and so does the music before a voice comes over the speakers announcing ‘special guests in the club tonight’ and Jack barely has time to duck his head before he’s hearing Tater’s name alongside his own.

“Crisse,” Jack curses while Tater stands to accept the resulting applause.

“AM HERE TO FIND ZIMMBONI CUTE BOYFRIEND,” Tater yells gesturing at a red-faced Jack. “HE LIKES BLONDES WITH SOFT HANDS.”

The crowd goes wild, practically drowning out the music.

“Well,” Jack peeks through his fingers and sees the glitter covered announcer staring him down, mic pressed close to his Providence Blue lips. “Lucky you, we have one of those up for auction tonight.”

Blue Harness comes to a stop on the other side of the stage with the other men up for auction and Jack tries not the stare, looking for the aforementioned blonde.

“Did you see him already?” Jack askes Tater, kicking himself for falling prey to his own curiosity.

“No,” Tater whispers loudly, “but always save best for last. You have to bid, or I bid for you.”

The lights go pink and Jack leans back in his chair, forcing himself to enjoy whatever is about to happen.

“Ladies, Gentleman, everything and everyone betwixt and between,” the MC teases. “Our last lot of the evening is a feisty peach from the sunny south who can out-skate, out-bake, and out-class just about any man on the ice.”

Tater wolf-whistles while Jack stares, lost in anticipation -- too preoccupied to comment on the fact ‘betwixt’ and ‘between’ are the same thing -- as the curtain slides back to reveal a short, adorable blonde with big brown eyes and very little covering his nearly perfect body. The man sees Jack, flashes a bright, teasing smile, and Jack’s breath leaves him.

“Our very own NCAA Champion, Eric ‘Bitty’ Bittle. Bidding starts at $500.”

Jack can’t make his voice work and someone else gets the first bid -- in fact, the auction is all the way up to $2000 by the time Jack can choke out “$1500,” but Jack’s voice is drowned out by Tater’s yell of “$3000!”, and Jack nearly gives himself whiplash turning to his teammate.

“What are you doing?”

“Bad taste for you to buy your own boyfriend, so I will buy for you. You will pay me back later -- I can be best man at your wedding.”

Someone else ups it another two hundred and there’s a slight commotion on stage. Bittle, ‘Bitty’ Jack silently corrects, has taken the mic and is assessing the crowd with an amused expression amid catcalls and whistles.

“Y’all, I’m very flattered, but you know you’re just buying a date, right? And you should also know I don’t put out on the first date.”

Some of the cheers slide to boos as Bitty hands back the mic before kissing two fingers and pressing them against his bare ass, skin practically glowing against the stark-white jock and thigh-high socks. Jack’s so light headed he’s going to pass out. He’s already dead.

Tater looks like he’s about to bid again when someone sticks a phone in Jack’s face and all hell breaks loose because Tater tries to grab the thing and by the time the dust has settled Jack is being ushered to the door and the auction is the least of their worries.

“All this press and you didn’t even get laid?”

“I knew it was a fucking mistake,” Jack grunts, trying to focus on his quads and fighting the heat in his cheeks as the boys keep chirping. He’s embarrassed for more than a few reasons. The pictures that popped up online, the call to his publicist, the fact he really wanted to win that date and couldn’t handle the attention long enough to pull it together.

It’s a lot of regrets to bring to a late-season home game.

Jack’s still going through his warm-up stretches when he starts hearing a tapping behind him -- he doesn’t look, he’s too experienced for that -- but eventually, the tapping becomes small voices saying, “Excuse me? Mister Zimmermann?”

Crisse. They’re being polite. He swipes a puck near his skate and stands, ready to plaster on a smile for whatever parent is pimping out their child for a game puck when he sees a familiar tuft of blonde hair through the glass.

Oh.

Bittle waves shyly from behind a whole slew of small children in Falcs gear, face pink with the chill in the arena. He’s bundled up tight, a blue and yellow scarf around his neck, looking embarrassed but determined. He’s as handsome fully clothed as he was barely dressed the night before.

Bitty calls out something over the kids' chatter, and Jack can barely make it out.

“I can’t hear you,” Jack tries, and Bitty shakes his head apologetically.

He swipes a few more pucks from the ice and shoves them through the camera hole before motioning for Bitty to follow him toward the penalty box, which is more of a task than expected as the seats are half full and cordoned off. Jack moves ahead and raps on the door of the penalty box until the attendant, Marcus, finally lets him in.

“Jack, what’s going on --”

“You see that guy?” Jack points to Bittle, who is trying to negotiate his way past an usher one section over. “Blonde guy they aren’t letting into 109, can you go get him?”

“You know I can’t leave, kid.”

“Ugh, fine,” Jack pulls off his gloves and sidles past Marcus to pull open the side door and step out into the stands, much to the shock of the dozen or so fans sitting in the first few rows.

“Zimmermann! What the hell are you doing?”

Jack sticks two fingers in his mouth and whistles loudly until the usher turns to see what’s going on, and Jack recognizes the staffer almost immediately. Unfortunately, he also attracts the attention of every fan the surrounding three sections.

“Hey, Christine! He’s with me! Let him through!”

She waves apologetically and Bittle, bright red with embarrassment, slides past the other attendees to reach Jack, who is back hiding behind the door as fans pile up behind the glass hoping for a photo. Eventually, Bitty makes it to the penalty box and Jack cracks open the door to let him in, but not before tossing a few bait pucks to the fans in the way.

“I don’t think any of those are going to kids,” Bitty chides with his delightful accent, collecting himself and making Jack’s heart melt even as fans keep slapping the glass hoping for more swag.

“eBay,” Jack mumbles, looking down because Bittle is a solid foot shorter than him in skates. Jack could lift him easily. “Probably. Hi.”

“Hi,” Bittle returns, the red in his cheeks still bright. “Hey, I thought you were going to win the auction.”

“What?”

Marcus coughs and says, “I don’t think you’re allowed to do this.”

There’s a pounding behind Jack and he catches Poots and Snowy making kissy faces at them. He can’t flip them off with kids around but they know he wants to, the look on his face is enough. Thankfully, Bittle laughs and blows a kiss back for good measure.

“I like him!” Poots yells, skating off. “I’m gonna tell Tater!”

“That’s what I was trying to tell you,” Bittle continues. “I thought you were going to win. Then you were just gone. Hurt my ego a bit.”

“Bad timing,” Jack apologizes. “I get skittish around cameras.”

“Mmm,” Bitty hums and turns around to look at the dozen people recording them on their phones. “And this is much more private?”

“Well, you picked the venue,” Jack fights a smile and summons his courage, leaning down to whisper in Bitty’s perfectly shaped ear, “and, you’re wearing clothes this time.”

Someone slams into the boards hard enough to rock the wall and Jack spins, dropping a protective arm around Bittle. It’s Tater, grinning like a damn loon.

“LITTLE B! YOU FIND ZIMMBONI!”

“I did! Thank you again for the tickets, Alexei,” Bitty shouts back, leaning into Jack’s side. “I’m very grateful.”

Tater opens the box door and leans in, “Zimmboni, see, I am best wingman, Kenny tell you this. Also, coach pretty mad, you should come do job, now. Paid to skate, not kiss cute boy. Do that after game.”

Bitty giggles and Jack looks up to see there are only seven minutes left on the clock. “Crisse, I need to go,” he curses, looking back down at Bitty. “Where are you sitting?”

“Section 113, but how am I supposed to --”

“Go back and find Christine, the usher you were talking to, tell her Jack wants you to go to Bob’s Box, she’ll take care of you. I’ll find you after the game.”

“Okay, ‘Bob’s Box’, I can do that,” Bitty seems only slightly overwhelmed by the orders but nods dutifully, stepping aside for Jack to pull open the side door. “Wait, who’s ‘Bob’?”

Marcus snorts and Jack fights a laugh because, of course, this hockey playing angel wouldn’t know. If Jack wasn’t in love before, he sure as hell is now.

“You’ll find out,” Jack teases, leaning down once more to whisper, “and maybe tonight you’ll get a chance to see me wearing nothing but a jock strap. If you want.”

He drops a quick kiss to Bitty’s cheek, heedless of the cameras, and hopes to god he hasn’t ruined everything. 

Evidently, he hasn’t because when he rears back, Bittle is staring at him with wide eyes and a bright smile, almost dazed.

“Oh, honey, I want that very much,” he sighs, reluctantly slipping through the fans and out into the stands, heading toward Christine. “See you soon!”

He’s beautiful. Jack might have a date. Hell, Jack might even have a boyfriend.

“Zimmermann! Close the damn door!”

First, however, Jack might have a League Fine.

[girlonfilmmovies]

Welcome to Friend Island: "Love Island US Season 3" and the Gaping Sores of America

So I foolishly thought that in the new year of 2021, the world would be in a better place than it was the previous year. After all, we were coming out of the "worst" of the most horrifying pandemic of the past century, a middling presidency that at that point served only a wealth of TV soundbites and less actual damage to the political system, and we were looking forward to a brighter future and a return to what some hoped would be "normal". The past was the past, and this was going to be a new moment.

Oh how naïve we all were.

As of this writing Covid-19 cases are hitting staggering new highs in the southern US, with Florida (of course) somehow hitting a record amount despite vaccines being easily available in the country for months. The death rates are at almost the same as last year. The middling disaster of the 45th president had one more trick up its sleeve, a firebomb brewing for dozens of years that went off in one of the most embarrassing fiascos of American political history. Misinformation has already implanted itself so thoroughly among half the country that people would rather die than admit they were wrong; the spread of such chaos being happily spat out through the algorithms of corporations only intent on raking in dollar signs. All the potential benefits that could have come from this once-in-a-lifetime moment are being briskly swept away: offices demanding their employees come back, no respect given to science and healthcare workers, the country's clearly weak infrastructure forced right back into action as if we didn't just see its gaping holes. The earth is dying and the people who actually have the resources do something about it instead have kickstarted a capitalist space race.

2021 has gone to show that old, toxic habits die hard.

Sigh.

Yeah, I watched Love Island again.

Despite my... let's say mixed feelings regarding last year's shitshow, I couldn't help but admit that it was the closest thing that I've had to appointment viewing TV that I've had in a long time. In an era of streaming and DVR boxes, it's a bit of an actual feat to get someone who works a fulltime job (especially one with erratic scheduling) to go out of their way to watch something the second it premieres. Love Island brings the family together, so they can engage in our favorite pastime: pointing and laughing at young, dumb, fame hungry cis-hets.

Plus, the second season had offered a fascinating glance at how to contend with a pandemic while also trying to stage a typical dumb reality show. The tropical island villa was swapped for a luxurious hotel rooftop in Las Vegas -- a literal ivory tower of ignorant hedonism looking down upon a plagued nation. You could feel the sexual tension of the hot, hyper-sexual adults forced without physical contact for months finally allowed to relieve themselves the only way they know how: toxic relationships. It was trying so hard to be an oasis in a desert yearning for frivolous content, but the façade was clearly visible to the point of satire. It was a wonderful thing to experience firsthand as what I originally thought as merely me dipping my toes into the genre.

Season 2 was the show that we deserved at the time, a funhouse mirror reflecting all the callous stupidity that had led us to this moment in world history. It attempted to offer a happy ending, a look towards the future: a black couple finally winning a reality show, a first for such a mainstream program (both of them actually kind of turned out to suck, but shhhh...).

It also allowed America to completely break the hearts of people while watching them fall apart live on TV. It was cruel, it was stupid, but most of all, it was fun as hell.

Season 3 is not about torturing the competitors. It's about torturing us.

In all fairness, there were a couple of lovely positive developments for the series this season. While still struggling with racial diversity a little bit, as evidenced by them casting only one very specific kind of black man like five times, strides are being taken elsewhere in the lane of body diversity. Alana makes her debut as literally the first woman on this show who isn't a size 0-2, looking absolutely gorgeous in every single shot.

The almost aggressively heteronormative nature of the show is slowly being shaken by a more openly queer cast than previously expected -- multiple bisexual/pansexual contestants participated, even though there wasn't any overtly queer romance shown (also almost all of them were women, with them describing their sexualities being confined to streaming exclusive episodes, which isn't... great). It's certainly a step in the right direction for a show that unceremoniously shuffled off the only queer member of the Season 2 cast overnight once the internet found his gay porn shoot. Ironically, they also ended up booting off the most openly queer member of this cast too, the purple haired proudly pansexual TikTok-er Leslie, but for the more legal reason of smuggling weed into the villa.

It's not terribly surprising that both Alana and Leslie garnered a lot of positive attention both inside and outside of the villa -- they stand out so much against the otherwise predictable casting that we've come to expect from this show and white American media in general. Alana is a woman with actual curves who looks stunningly gorgeous in comparison to the monotonous supermodel figures of everyone else. Leslie almost falls into a stereotype from the way she appears: dyed purple hair, tattooed all over, obviously queer, vaping weed constantly, exuding the kind of chaotic yet weirdly fun energy that only a former stripper can. Yet she obviously grabbed the attention of the contestants because while people like her abound in real life, in the fantasy land of reality TV she's an absolute rarity, a far cry from the sanitized beauty pageant-esque standards that they seem to pluck girls from. The men are still dumb, bland, boneheaded idiots in this show, but by offering some actual variety, they get to actually pursue people they aren't "traditionally" supposed to, while an outsider audience member like me gets to see women like herself be offered up for titillation in the same way "conventionally attractive" women are.

It's kind of cool, even if it is just playing into the icky sexualization of everyone, but hey...progress?

In an odd "two steps forward, one step back" kind of situation, the show has somewhat dialed down the outrageously toxic relationships of last year into a more relatively subdued level of toxicity. Gaslighting/cheating is at least kept to a relative low in this season compared to the nightmare that was last year, although this year's ratio depends on how much of that corresponds with sexy Columbian boy Will's obviously flimsy grasp of the intricacies of the English language. He continued to be plagued by the cliquey-ness of the cast until the very end but his genuinely sweet couple with Kyra still did enough to sneak into the final two.

The actual main problem this year was an almost unbearably long love triangle between Cash, Trina, and Cinco that refused to solve itself for nearly a month. Cash and Cinco perennially kept flip-flopping in their feelings for each other, bouncing between failed partnerships despite so obviously being into each other. Trina ended up roped in as Cinco's partner for a while, a constant victim of his own lack of courage to make up his damn mind. Cash, freshly single and in horny jail (aka Casa Amor), coupled up with the handsome and mysterious Charlie.

Now we need to discuss how bizarre Charlie as a cast member. Not only is he the only member who is, looks, and acts like an actual adult, but he also seems to show no adherence to the rules of reality TV: he's very relaxed and unassuming, seems genuinely uninterested in the "game" aspects of the show, and only perks up during rare moments of actual romantic potential. He's a fascinating spanner to throw into the machine of Love Island, and once Cinco was eliminated in the competition, Charlie had to sit there while Cash only continued to openly and aggressively pine for a man who isn't even her current partner. Proving once again to be an anomaly in the cast, he actually decided to do something about this: he unceremoniously dumped fan favorite Cash like a sack of bricks, sending her home while hooking up with the previously mentioned Alana. This smart decision was met derisively by viewers, despite him being the only person there who actually acted like a fucking adult for once. Ironically, this got him and Alana into the finals, where they finished in last place with the same trademark lack of enthusiasm that we've come to expect from him.

I suppose now we need to uncork the problem of the season and by extension the franchise as a whole. You might have read that previous situation and thought, "gee, a fan favorite got tossed aside while a guy that everyone hated ended up making it into the final four? That seems weird."

But by that point it really wasn't at all.

See, the problem with the voting is that you don't usually get to pick who goes; the audience only gets to pick who to prevent getting kicked. At that point, the audience control is out of our hands and now into the contestants', and if there's one thing we all learned in high school it's that cliques are very much a thing. The contestants seemed dead set on booting anybody who was new the second they had the chance, so many potentially exciting people were so quickly thrown out. Instead of the exciting potential we could have seen, we got a love triangle sucking anyone nearby into doom, with everyone else being a relatively stable couple or part of the Jeremy/Korey wishy-washy railway. Casa Amor was an absolute bust, with people making half-assed couplings despite still being in love with somebody else (it speaks a lot to the weakness of the Casa Amor men that Olivia literally preferred to come back single than with any of those planks of wood).

Part of the problem did rely on factors that nobody could control at all though. "Romance novel come to life" Slade seemed like a threat with his rugged handsomeness, twangy accent, and classic southern charm, but had to quickly leave due to ambiguous family troubles. Similarly, the nearly perfect Josh and Shannon, who seemed like an obvious shoo-in winner by virtue of being probably the only actual relationship on the show, had to depart in the middle of the night due to the tragic death of Josh's sister. Aforementioned chaotic pansexual Leslie was unceremoniously removed in the middle of the night once they had realized that her classic vape pen was actually full of weed, an especially tragic circumstance considering she basically had Cinco wrapped around her finger and was about to bring that love triangle crashing down (also tragic because she has gone on record saying that she was fully crushing on Genny while they were both in there, robbing us of any potential of a queer couple).

But part of the pain as always has to do with how the producers control everything no matter what: what we see, what we hear, who gets the villain edit and who gets the hero edit. It's why they seem to play Jeremy as dumb hot surfer bro instead of the actual funny and charming guy he is. It's why Trina was treated as a bitch and Cash as a woeful victim despite the roles more often than not lining up the other way around. And most embarrassingly, it's how the biggest joke couple of the show ended up winning it all.

Now, look at this picture right here: the poses, the awkward hand holding, the very strange smiles between those two. No, this is not a picture of two teenagers going to prom together who just met only five minutes ago and are taking pictures on their parents' front lawn; these two are the winners of season 3, the supposedly "strongest" couple on the show. This is Olivia and Korey.

Korey is a charming boyish sweetheart by way of an absolute fucking dumbass. He's sort of like last year's beloved and wonderfully stupid Carrington: a very sweet and nice teenager who seems to have "13 Going on 30"-ed his way into an adult body. He's childish in a way that's very cute and friendly but also woefully unattractive to anyone who's an adult. Just like Carrington, he notched up a staggering amount of dates with pretty much every single beautiful woman that came into the villa, all seemingly very interested in him. Carrington, for as dumb and childish as he is, could bag anyone because he was outrageously confident too. Korey on the other hand seems incapable of making any decision, following any girl who pays him the time of day like a little puppy, constantly looking up to her with his big puppy dog eyes. It's very telling that for all the dates he had, almost none of them actually went anywhere because it's just not that appealing to anyone. If you're looking to win, he's not someone who can scheme and play the game. If you're looking for love, he's not going to cut it because he can't seem to even understand the concept of romance. If you're looking for a friend, he's probably the best damn one you'll get in that villa -- but as constantly established by everyone, this show isn't called Friend Island.

Olivia is a bit of a thornier subject. She habitually couples up with people that you can kind of tell she's not at all into. She started the first half relatively unassuming and not particularly interested in the men that she was supposedly attracted to. But you could basically see her panties drop when Slade walked in, ready for him to pull her up into the saddle and ride away into the sunset. But his sudden departure only left her more empty, desperately grasping onto whatever random attraction she could. She went off to Casa Amor single and had the gall to come back without coupling up with any of them (although once again, they really dropped the ball with the men compared to the stunning Casa Amor women). And somehow in the midst of all this wishy washy mess, she finally settled on the one single man who she hadn't coupled up with and supposedly suddenly had feelings for: lonely, little Korey.

As a watcher of two seasons of this shit, I've seen a lot of fake relationships, but this one is just ridiculous. The chemistry is really nonexistent; she seems more annoyed or at best partially amused whenever he tries to say anything genuinely sweet to her. She reacts like how you would when a little kid tries to tell you they have a crush on you, an adult: you just kind of go, "aw, cute, thank you!" and walk away chuckling. It's genuinely comedic in how tragic it is, a boy who thinks he's finally found someone when all she's found is a trip to the bank.

And what did the editors do? They tried their very best to sell this as genuine, as actual romance. We know what romance is -- we basically saw it with Shannon and Josh, and to a lesser extent Will and Kyra. And yet they whipped out that expert level edit to say, "wow, look at these two lovebirds, huh?" It's ridiculous, especially since only in the final episode did they suddenly remember that Jeremy and the stunning Bailey (aka the combination of Gal Godot and Ashley Judd circa-2001) were an actual couple and even they looked more real than the winning couple.

Love Island is, if nothing else, a reflection of America.

It's an outdated tradition desperately grasping to what's left of the typical western idea of romance. No matter how many beauty pageant contestants they pick, men like women who aren't size 2s, or with natural hair/skin, or with family-friendly occupations. Women are probably tired of the big muscle bound hunks they usually put on here, the nearly identical men that they seem to cast every single season who have all the looks but zero of the confidence or personality.

It's an example of how our choices are an illusion, how our influence can be easily overwritten by those in charge. Votes that don't matter when they change the rules on the fly, ripping out the actual choice of the people in favor of letting them decide what stays and what goes.

It's a testament that even in the face of a viral pandemic that's quickly turning into part two, as the lives of millions are being further destroyed across the world, there will always be some asshole who has more than you and looks better than you, vacationing on a tropical island stolen from its people, ignorant of everything else that's happening around them.

Love Island hates everyone. It hates it's contestants. It hates the viewers. It hates change. It hates me.

But I do still kind of love it.

[shleezaemour]

Mine!!-a Soangelo smut fic

This is rated R and is very graphic. If you don't like reading things like that I suggest you skip this particular fic!! Will had been working in the infirmary for 12 days straight. I hadn't seen him except for mornings lunch and bedtime. I would make him breakfast and let him sleep as much as he could only to find him exhausted by the end of the day. Even falling asleep at the dinner table twice. I felt so bad for him. I also felt bad for me because Will being exhausted meant no alone time for us and I was getting a little frustrated. Will had a new class of healers in and since he was head healer he was teaching them all the last two weeks. Apollo apparently slowed down having kids so a few of them were not his siblings. He had 3 new apollos 1 Aphrodite 2 Demeter and 3 Hecate kids. It was a full class and each of these training sessions seemed to be twelve hours each. So needless to say I was bored. Even my fighting classes in the arena weren't twelve hours long. Usually they only took up four and only an hour was me actually teaching the rest is people trying it out and me correcting stances and lunges. After my morning class I decided to surprise Will with some lunch only to find him in the infirmary trying to teach kids how to make scrape paste which is this awful smelling teal paste that is imbued with Apollo hymns and nectar. Heals scraps and abrasions in less than 10 minutes. "Dr. Solace could you help me I have a pain" I dramatically fell against the wall with my wrist to my forehead doing my best impression of a southern bell. "Oh darlin I'll help you with any pain you can throw at me" he kissed me chastely grabbing the paper bag out of my hand. "I hope you like it?" "Is.. is that chili I smell?" "Yup with cornbread included I kinda...(whispering in ear) traveled to Austin to that place you told me you liked as a kid.." "You didn't!" "I did" "Oh baby you are way to good to me.. how will I ever repay you?" "Oh I can think of a few ways..." His eyes darkened as he leaned into me. Melting into him I heard a cough behind him. "Hey Will? I have a scrape here on my hip could you show me how the paste you showed us how to make should be applied?" The girl was about 17 years old and an obvious Aphrodite girl. She was about 4 inches shorter than Will (I was almost a whole foot shorter) she had this shiny ruby red hair and matching lips that were perfect in shape. Curvy yet delicate. Eyes so green they rivaled Percy's.. I instantly hated her. Pulling her scrub pants down way to low... like pube line low she showed us this tiny little scrape. Looks like she did it herself scratching. A low growl escaped my throat surprising even me. Will shot me a look of "dude what the hell was that?!" I shrugged. Getting the paste he kneeled down taking a wooden tongue depressor spreading the paste on the scrape. She had the audacity to moan as he put it on. Then she shot me a wink. Oh fuck this bitch!! "Oh it's cold. Thank you Will your so gentle" then she reached to kiss him on the cheek while squeezing his arm. "Uh yeah ok well go sit down for ten minutes and have Lisa the Demeter girl wipe it off for you" "Is there a special way to take it off? Maybe you should show me?" She whined. "No it's just normal paste Lisa can do it" Flashing him a greedy smile she sauntered off flipping her hair giving me one last bitchy wink. "Oh we need to have a talk outside like now!" "What?!" "Now!" Pulling him outside I could hear that bitch chuckle. "Babe what's wrong?" "What's wrong! Who the Fuck is that!" "That's Desi she's pipers new sister she arrived a month ago. She has a healing voice actually she can sing and make people better that's why she joined the infirmary. Like the healing power of love type thing I guess. She's the best in the class actually. She can spot relationships too it's actually really cool." "Cool? It's cool? Is it cool when she's bending over infront of you asking you to touch her and..." "Wait! Are you jealous?" "Jealous no I'm not.. Will that's stupid it just she's obviously not here just to learn how to heal!" "Nico your being unreasonable just because she is attractive and a Aphrodite girl doesn't mean she's hitting on me" "What are you blind! She just winked at me twice!" "Really cause that sounds like she's hitting on you!" "No she winked at me because she knows watching you touch her bothers me!" "So you are jealous!" "I'm.. I'm not.. oh fuck you Will. Enjoy your chili!" I stomped off leaving him staring after me. How could he not see what's going on! How could he not see her fawning over him. Men I swear pathetic! Well maybe not cause I'm a man but still. I needed to kill something. Hit something. Scream! I ran toward the arena snatching up my Stygian iron sword. Percy saw me heading in and came up next to me. "You look pissed!" "I am pissed!" "Wanna talk about it?" "No!" "Wanna spar about it?" "Only if you feel like bleeding" "Oh I feel like bleeding!" "Fine let's go ocean spray!" "You got it deathboy!" I spent the next few hours exhausting my body slashing and lunging at Percy. Trudging into my cabin my sister was lounging on my bed listening to one of my records. "Oh my gods Nico what have you been doing?" "Sparring with Percy." "Yeah well you need a shower. Throw your clothes out the door and I'll put them in the wash with mine cause you can't leave those laying around with me here this weekend." "Ok I got it I smell sis! I'm a dude I sweat it happens." "Yeah well im serious" I started taking off my clothes just to make her freak out. Covering her eyes screaming at me I threw my stuff at her and walked to the bathroom. The shower felt good. The hot water was washing the stink of jealously off of me but I couldn't get that feeling in the bottom of my stomach to untie itself. I heard Hazel walk on the bathroom to set my PJs on the toilet for me. "I have fresh towels for you too." "Thanks Haze... hey can you stay I wanna talk to you about something" "Can't this wait til your out of the shower?" "I'm not going to lie the minute I get out of this shower I'm not going to have the nerve to ask you" "Ok shoot" I heard her sit on the closed toilet. To some this would be weird even for a brother and sister but Hazel and I grew up in a time where you were closer to your siblings than now. Plus she couldn't see anything anyway with the shower curtain. I couldn't look her in the face and ask these questions. "What do you know about that new girl Desi?" "Other than that she's a boyfriend stealer? Nothing" "Boyfriend stealer?" "Yeah she likes the game of flirting and hooking up with girls boyfriends just to split them up for fun because she never dates the guys afterwards. She gets far enough with them to break the couple up than she bolts." "How do you know this?" "Piper told me and she had already tried to hit on Jason and Percy and got shot down pretty quick. Why do you ask?" "Cause she's flirting with Will. Like hitting herself so he has to touch her and feeling him up infront of me" "It's like she's bound and determined to break up atleast one of the big three" "If that's the case why didn't she just try to go after me?" "Because your gay. She had no chance with you where with Will she has a chance because he's bisexual" "You don't think... you don't think he would.. do you" "Will? No Nico he loves you and he's the monogamous type." "I hate to admit it but I'm jealous. I'm also afraid Will might give in to her advances" "Why would you think that Neeks! " "Cause she's a girl and she has things that I can't give him!" "Of you don't think Will is smart enough to see right through her your dumber than I thought!" "Hazel you know what I mean!" "Will loves you he won't give in I'm sure of it." "What makes you so sure" "Cause instead of going to the bonfire tonight he's asleep on your bed right now. Like out cold!" "Wait he's here?" "Yeah he fell in your bed and died" "Poor thing. Probably swallowed his dinner without even tasting t and passed out." "Pretty much. I took his shoes off for him" "You think I have anything to worry about?" "No atleast not on his end. Her end well she will try Neeks but she will fail" "Thanks sis" "No problem. Make sure you strip him before you go to bed you know how hot he gets at night." "How do you know that?!" "Because I do both of your laundry. This PJs are always soaked in the morning when I stay here" "Yeah well..." "Yeah I know he probably sleeps naked when I'm not here right?" "Correct" "Yeah we'll leave his underpants on please and no funny business while I'm here!" "Gods just go!" She left laughing. Like her and Frank don't fool around! After my shower and nightly routine I padded my way toward the bed. Will was still on jeans and scrubs. Hair pulled back in a pony tail drooling on his pillow on his side of the bed. Turning his heavy ass over I undid his pants and pulled them off. Lifting him up I took off the scrub shirt which already was pretty sweat soaked from the short time he was asleep. Unlike me he didn't stink as much as have this manly musk scent. I loved it. Crawling in bed next to him I spooned him from behind kissing his neck as he clasped my hand entwining our fingers. I maybe smaller but I liked being the big spoon. The next morning I stirred sleepily as he kissed me awake. "Baby I got to go to work" "No baby stay" I whined in a croaky voice. Attaching myself like an octopus. "Baby I really got to go but why don't you stop by later ok?" "Fine" "Good. I love you" "Love you too dork" Kissing me chastely he got up from the bed and I watched him stroll out the door. Away from me.. toward her... * I'm sitting on my bed waiting to go see Will. He told me he would be free around 6 tonight cutting class short so we could have some alone time. The lights were off in my room and I was trying my best not to snoop. If I wanted to I knew there was always a dark corner in the from left corner of the infirmary.. I could peek into the shadows and see what's going on. I trust him I do trust him and it's only an hour before I see him but the not knowing is killing me. I cave. Swirling the shadows infront of me I open a window in the darkness seeing into the infirmary and watch the scene play out in front of me. Will was dismissing the kids and cleaning up the supply for the day. No jnjuries today since the lava wall is in the fritz and campers have greek classes with annabeth and arts and crafts. Low and behold little miss paste waist is still lingering "helping" Will clean up. Every time she came close to him she would find a reason to touch him. Rubbing different body parts on him. Her ass. Her chest. A innocent hand or brush of an arm. How did he not realize what she's doing! She's shamelessly throwing herself at him! "So Will your bi right?" "Uh yeah." "So that means you like girls too right?" "I'm attracted to girls as well as boys yes" "But your dating the Emo kid right?" "Nico isn't Emo he's just.. nico" "How long have you two been dating?" "Almost two years in October" "So do you date girls too?" "No I'm dating Nico" "But if your bisexual..." "I'm faithful to Nico Desi." "But wouldn't you prefer both?" "Some people do that and that's ok but I can only date one person at a time" "Oh well what kind of girls do you like?" "I don't know I've never had a crush on one really. Not like Nico." "So you love him?" "Of course I do what's not to love?" "Well isn't he depressing and hateful? That's what everyone else says about him. Creepy too. He can raise zombies and are you not freaked out that he pretty much has the aura of death around him all the time? I just think you deserve better" she said placing her hands on his shoulders snaking them around his neck. "I don't know who you have been talking to but that's not what being around nico is like. The thing about being a healer is understanding and excepting the idea that you can't save everyone. Some times death is unavoidable. Nico taught me that. Plus Nico for me is forever." "But arnt you curious? Just a little.. about being with a girl..." "Even if I was it wouldn't be you Desi." He said calmly and brushed her hands off his shoulders. "Why not? I won't tell.. you can have me and no one has to know..." she leaned in about to kiss Will. I jumped through the shadow landing in the corner just to see her place her lips on him. Before I could jump in and scratch the bitches eyes out he pushed her away.. harshly. "Desi I think you should leave and I think you should rethink your job here in the infirmary!" "But.. but Will I.. I.. " "Keep your buts to yourself! Gods Nico was right about you! I don't want to see you in here again unless your sick or hurt and don't bother asking for me. Kayla or Austin can help you just fine!" Stomping her foot she turned and saw me. Smiling she licked her lips. "Atleast I got to taste him once." Wink. "Bitch when I'm done with you Bryce Lawrence will look like a dream!" Will grabbed me as she skipped out the door. I broke free heading to the door. Will followed me thinking I was going after her. Once at the door I locked it and turned around. Grabbing Will by the front of his shirt I slammed him against the door. "Don't you ever. Let. Anyone. Touch. You. But. Me!" I shouted in a staccato rhythm. Placing my lips harshly against his. I tangled my fingers in his hair raking them painfully over his scalp. Biting and pulling at his lower lip I growled deep in my chest "MINE!" In a wild tongue play we stumbled across the infirmary dancing past cots and supplies til we toppled over onto one. I straddled his lap roaming my hands under his shirt feeling his strong corded muscle under my rough hands memorizing his topography. Moving his hands under my shirt grazing my sides with his finger tips lightly I could feel his heart hammering under my palms. A sheen of sweat broke out over my skin as I undid his fly pulling at his pants. Crawling off of him he removed his shirt as I pulled his length out of his shorts. On my knees infront of him I placed opened mouth kisses at the base of him squeezing his crown with thin fingers. Locking eyes he knew better than to take them off of me. I was going to remind him that he was mine. Give him a memory he could recall anytime anyone tried to challenge his love for me. Licking him from base to tip feeling he shudder that ran through his body. Swallowing him in my mouth I could taste him leak little spurts of pre cum onto my tongue causing my mouth to salivate. Panting above me he gripped my shoulders kneading his fingers into my shoulders and down my back. Reaching one of his hands over he grabbed a tube of lubricant. Placing it next to him I made quick use of it applying it to my fingers. I put my fingers inside of him two at a time. He deserved a little pain being stupid enough to think that girl wasn't into him. Crying out he excepted my harsh intrusion as I took him further and further down my throat. Trying to take control he placed one hand in my hair only for me to snatch it and hold his wrists at his sides. Nope sir you are not the one in charge here! Using the flat part of my tongue I ran it up the underside hitting the main vein so slowly that I thought he might just die from the heavy breathing and the panting it was inducing. Crooking my fingers upward a high pitched sound that didn't usually escape Will flew from his lips. Looks like I found his good spot. Three fingers now... Will was mess. Trying to hold himself together at my mercy. Stripping him completely naked I began to strip my own clothes off making it a bit of a show. Slowly peeling fabric off of my pale skin letting him take in every inch of my body. Reaching for his dick I smacked his hand away. "No touching! That's my job Doctor Solace and you will not have me employed so soon" Reaching down to my skinny jeans I looped my thumbs in the waist playing with it. Leaving him exposed vulnerable and wanting. Licking his lips as I played with my sharp hip bones I dragged the waist band down hooking my thumb in my briefs exposing my base. Biting his lower lip at the sight of me I could feel the impatience wafting off of him just waiting hard and leaking for me. Taking my time I slid my pants off along with my briefs feeling sexier than I ever have. Something about his undivided attention was really doing it for me. Straddling the cot I lifted his legs to rest on either side of my thighs pulling him to me. A little bit of fear was laced in his eyes. I had never taken Will. This would be his first time on bottom.. I didn't ask him. I was telling him. Obviously he expect me to straddle him not the cot itself. To bad doctor Solace your going to have to deal with this. I nudged my member infront of his entrance teasing it. A faint glow broke out across his face as his freckles took alight at the impending situation. Stroking up and down him I pulled and teased at his pubic hair causing his dick to twitch betraying his excitement. Pushing in slowly... well I wasn't pushing I was pulling myself into him by his thighs. A low groan filled the room much louder than I think even he expected. Hot wet heat surrounded me and I began to distract myself by bringing my hand to his face. Pressing my thumb against his lips tracing their outline the tip of his tongue snuck out to taste my skin. Pressing my thumb on the pad of his tongue I could feel him begin to suck. Short shallow strokes into him turned into long hard ones. Pulling him up by his hips I surprised him with my strength angling us differently so I could find his prostate. I prodded until I saw the sweat on his brow form and his eyes close at the sudden sensation he was feeling. You could read all of them on his face. Each and every feeling. The stretch he was feeling the euphoria of the sweet spot. The lack of control he wasn't used to having. Arms flying trying to grip onto something that wasn't there trying to give himself a little bit of grounding. I wasn't having that. I liked him like this. Overwhelmed....Submissive.....Desperate. My hand snaked around his throat squeezing just hard enough for him to know I was there but not enough to cut off his breathing entirely. "Ni..nico..p..please can I.. I need.. please" "Oh do you want to cum Will?" "Yes!!!" He wailed hoping I could grant him release. "Nope not yet. You haven't learned your lesson yet" "But.. b..but... I can't.. almost.." "Oh no you don't!" I pulled out harshly leaving him whining at the loss. Feeling empty and so so close. "Hands and knees. Now!" I ordered. Turning at lightning speed he flipped and spread far enough that I could reach him. Getting on my knees I clawed at his backside trailing and digging my nails into his flesh almost to the point of drawing blood. I sheathed myself in him with a jolt to his body excepting the foreign feeling. "Please!! Oh my gods please Nico I.. I can't hold.." "Can't hold what Will tell me!" "I'm going to.. I need to.." "I still don't hear the words Will" "Nico I need to come please can I cum please please please!!" His desperate cries set me off inside him. "Will oh..ahh..cum baby cum!" I could feel him shudder his orgasm onto the cot below as I twitched and pulsed inside him riding us both through. Grabbing a blanket from the side of the cot he laid it on the white substance and turned over pulling me to him. Sprawling on top of him we basked in our after glow breathing heavy not touching or talking other than just me being on top of him. "Well.. wow.. that happened.." "Yeah.. I think that's the first time we defiled the infirmary." "Well then.. looks like we will be doing that more often" "Oh.. yeah..often.."