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dean-winchester-is-a-warrior · 7 months

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The Dangers of Hope Ch. 5

Series Summary: When Y/N shows up at Camp Chitaqua with her little girl in tow, her bloodshot eyes leave no doubt that she's infected. Or is she? Everything Dean has come to know for certain over the last five hellish years, is about to be challenged.

Pairings/Characters in the series: Endverse!Dean x Reader, Emma (OFC), Castiel, Sam Winchester, Lucifer, Michael, Zachariah, Risa, Johnston (OMC), Patrick (OMC), Theresa (OFC), other survivors and soldiers.

Series Explicit 18 +/Warnings: Show level violence, some gore, angst, smut, fluff all the usual for a series of mine. ❤️ Endverse!Dean (that's a warning for his anger and callousness as well as his extreme hotness. 😁) Each chapter will have their own specific warnings.

Chapter Warnings: Nothing major.

Word Count: 5,402

A/N: So, I've had this idea for quite a while. Basically since I watched The Last of Us. I loved Pedro in the role of Joel, but I kept thinking how incredible Jensen would have been. Which then made me think of how amazing he was as Endverse!Dean which then led me to this idea. Lol! I've stolen the premise of Ellie's storyline from TLOU, but made her a grown up, a reader insert, and a love interest for Dean.

If you've never seen TLOU, don't worry - you don't need to have seen it to understand this story. 😊

I've taken some liberties with the Endverse in my story, changed a few things from canon, but kept lots of things too.

I sincerely hope you enjoy the story. It will be ten chapters and I will do my very best to post one chapter every weekend. ❤️

A/N 2: Sorry, this chapter is a bit longer than usual, but I hope you enjoy it anyway. 😘

Series Master List || Main Master List || Tag Lists

The dividers below were created by @saradika

Over the next two weeks, Dean did whatever he could to avoid being around Y/N. He was determined that the morning at the river was simply going to be a weird one off. It was some kind of reaction to Y/N’s unfamiliar presence. Her emotions and her rose-colored outlook on the world had contaminated him somehow.

He didn’t know why, but there was something about her that always made him question his decisions, constantly rework his plans. She just brought something out in him, so he stayed the hell away from her as much as possible.

He knew she’d set up the school and begun teaching. But there again, she’d made him change his plans. The plan had been to use the sheds behind the cabin for storage; that was the whole reason for building them!

But apparently Y/N had worked her magic with Brandy and before he knew it the sensible, practical woman had him convinced to let Y/N and the kids take up one of their very limited storage spaces, just to sit around doing algebra and reading poetry - or whatever she was teaching them.

It was ridiculous.

But even though he avoided her during the day, there was no turning off his brain at night, when he closed his eyes and visions of her soft curves and the memory of her silky skin beneath his fingers plagued his thoughts. He told himself to smarten up, that he had so many more important things to be thinking about.

He decided he just needed sex; it had been too long. So one night he showed up in Risa’s tent after midnight and she opened her arms to him the way she always did.

But as he kissed her and moved his hands over her body, her gentle sighs and soft moans weren’t doing what he needed them to, and he realized he was being an asshole trying to replace one woman with another. Risa was a good soldier and she’d been a soft place for him to land too many times to just use her as a distraction.

So he got up and left, giving her a lame excuse, “I forgot I have to be up early tomorrow to…go over things with Johnston.” He tried not to notice Risa’s frown. He couldn't tell if she was mad or sad, and he didn't really want to stick around to find out.

As the days moved on, he realized it was next to impossible to completely avoid Y/N, whether day or night. Because no matter how he tried to ignore her, he saw her influence everywhere. He could sense a shift in the air, he swore people were smiling more and every once in a while, he could hear kids laughing loudly.

That was a foreign sound nowadays, and it unnerved him. And smiling seemed foolish. What was there to smile about? Being happy just invited tragedy. He knew in the old days he would have been called a pessimist. But he was simply being a realist as he'd always been. He called things as they were, and he wasn't about to let a pretty smile and a bouncy attitude change that.

One evening, about a month after Y/N arrived at the camp, Dean was headed to the storage shed to take a thorough inventory before they left the next day on a raid - one of their last before the snows came in mid November. He knew they were gonna need more propane than what they had stored in order to run the generator over the winter. The generator ran the fridge and freezer where they kept their food stored.

It could also power the electricity in the big cabin for a little while if needed. There had been nearly a week last winter that had been so piercingly cold that they’d all needed to jam themselves into the cabin and run the electric heat as much as possible. It had simply been too cold for the little camp stoves in the tents; the wood-burning stoves just couldn’t generate enough heat to combat the intense cold that seeped through the thick canvas walls.

So their generator had saved them, and it ran on propane, which meant they needed more than enough to last through another possible cold snap.

Dean had deliberately waited to start the task until it was nearly sundown since the school would be empty by then and he could avoid running into the teacher that worked there.

But as he approached the small building he could see a wavering light in the window - a lamp moving towards him. Before he could turn and leave (he wasn’t going to call it running away) Y/N stepped out into the semi-darkness and gasped as she saw him standing there.

She put the hand not holding the kerosene lamp to her chest. “Oh my lord!” She breathed out raggedly. “You scared me half to death.” But she was chuckling as she said it and walked closer to him.

He cleared his throat. “Yeah, I uh…I thought you’d be gone.” He knew he sounded slightly accusatory. “Why are you still here? Haven’t the kids been gone for hours?”

Y/N nodded. “Yeah. I came back to put up the gift we got from Tom Richardson.” She waved him towards the building behind her. “You should come see the school.”

Dean shook his head. “No, I’ve got…I have to -”

She cut him off with wide, pleading eyes. “Please?” She added a bright, imploring smile and Dean shook his head. Why was he even bothering to say no to her at this point? He gestured for her to lead the way into the little building and he followed at a distance.

They walked in and she set the lamp on the small table in the corner and turned it up full so that it completely lit up the tiny room. She held her arms out to the sides, showing off her little schoolroom with pride.

“What do you think?”

He shook his head. “It’s uh…pretty empty.” He said looking around.

Y/N shrugged and seemed a little deflated. “It’s a work in progress.”

Dean grunted his acknowledgement and continued his sweep of the room. On the floor against the back, Northern, wall were a couple of piles of wool blankets, and right above them was a mural of multicolored leaves stuck to the wall.

When she saw him looking at it and frowning, Y/N explained. “I got the kids to find a bunch of pretty, fallen leaves, and then we used some tree sap as glue to stick them up. I got to teach them a little bit about trees and ecosystems, and we also made something pretty to hang on the wall.”

He nodded at the blankets. “Is that where the kids sit?”

“Yeah.” She said with another shrug. “We’re a little packed in, but it keeps us warm. The blankets just take the chill out of the floor and make it a bit softer to sit on.”

Dean nodded absently and looked left, his eye catching on the only other object in the room. It was a paper map hanging on the western wall, held in place by two small nails.

Dean frowned again. “Is that a map of America?”

Y/N nodded excitedly. “Yeah, that was the gift from Tom Richardson. It was so kind of him. His son, Jonah is a sweet little guy, but I guess he’s been pretty quiet over the last year or so. He lost his mom just before he and Tom got to Chitaqua?” She said, clearly using the words as a question to see if he knew who she was talking about.

Dean nodded, a vague recollection coming to his mind of a big burly guy and a scrawny little kid. He remembered thinking the guy would be a hard worker, and the kid probably wasn’t gonna make it. He’d looked pretty sick.

Y/N continued. “Well, I guess since he started school he’s been talking more in the evenings, even asking Tom questions about The Knights of the Round Table. I’ve been sharing some of the legends with them this week. So, Tom was grateful and as a thank you, he gave us this map that he’d kept tucked away in his backpack all this time. Said it made him feel peaceful to look at it and remember better times. But he thought we could use it more.”

She smiled wistfully and gazed at the slightly ratty map.

“Why?” Dean asked with a slight jolt in his gut. He waved at the map. “It’s not like this anymore.”

Y/N nodded and lowered her gaze to the ground. “Yeah, I know, but the general shape of the country is still the same, and I can use it as half geography, half history.”

When she looked back up at him, her face was set in lines of disappointment. She waved her hand to encompass the whole hundred and fifty square feet. “You don’t like it?” She asked with a weak chuckle.

Dean shrugged. “No it's, I mean, it’s fine. You know, work in progress, like you said.”

Y/N nodded and smiled, looking a little bolstered. “Yeah, slow but sure. And you know,” her smile turned shy, “I’ve really wanted to thank you for giving up the space for the school, I know this wasn’t what the shed was earmarked for.”

Dean cleared his throat. “Yeah, well, Brandy made sense. Can’t have the kids wandering around outside after the cold comes.”

Y/N frowned. “I’ve wanted to thank you, but every time I’ve looked for you, I seem to have just missed you.”

Dean scowled defensively. “Just busy.”

Y/N nodded.

“Well look,” Dean said, backing away, “I gotta get to…stuff.” He shook his head. “I mean, we’re leaving on a raid tomorrow and I gotta prepare for it.”

“Oh, be careful.” Y/N said, biting her lip in concern.

It was far too hard for Dean to rip his eyes away from where her teeth sunk into the satiny sweep of her bottom lip. But he jerked his head up and then spun away as he answered her. “Always am.”

***

The raid was successful; in fact it was one of the most successful ones they’d ever had. They’d traveled all the way to St. Louis, hoping to find some gas stations there that hadn’t been picked clean. But they had no luck. Since going home empty-handed wasn’t an option, they went North to Springfield and hit the jackpot.

They found an old Costco on the outskirts of the city that had barely been hit. They filled and loaded up enough propane tanks to see them through the winter and then some.

They also loaded up as much food as they could, and even found some usable meds left in the pharmacy there. They grabbed clothes and kitchen things like plates and pots, utensils, also managing to find a few things that had become rare and quite precious, like eyeglasses and sunglasses. They also found spare tires and car parts, and a few simple pieces of practical furniture. They took as much as they could load into the back of two trucks and a Jeep.

Dean packed up one more big box, setting it on top of the others; it was just something he thought might come in handy. He refused to think too long about why he’d gathered together the things in the box.

They made it back to camp less than two days after they left, a record for a raid. They usually took a week or more because they had to scavenge through a bunch of different cities, and fight off masses of Croats. But this time, they didn't see any Croats at all, and they'd scored an incredible haul quickly, which meant that, barring some kind of catastrophe, they wouldn't have to go out again until the snow melted.

They pulled into the camp around noon and Dean spent a few hours helping to unload the trucks and organize where everything went. When the campers saw the piles of booty in the trucks, people actually started clapping. An air of joviality pervaded as they all worked together to put things away until the next day. At which point they'd begin accounting for it all, sharing what was needed immediately, and then safely storing away the rest.

Y/N and her students left their little schoolroom to come help as well and the kid’s eyes were wide and excited, looking at everything that had been brought back as though it was Christmas Eve.

When everything was unloaded, Dean grabbed the box he’d put aside and brought it to Y/N who’d returned to the school to drop off the two folding chairs she’d claimed for the classroom.

He knocked on the open door, grateful for the hard wood beneath his knuckles this time. Y/N turned to face him and her eyes were almost as bright and excited as the kids’.

“Hi!” She said enthusiastically. “Wow, you guys sure brought home the bacon on this raid!”

Dean shook his head. “No bacon. It was fairly rancid.”

Y/N chuckled lightly and scrunched up her nose. “Yeah, wise decision to leave that behind.”

Dean nodded and set the big box on the plywood floor with a heavy thump. “This is for you. For the school.” He amended.

Y/N looked a bit dumbfounded for a moment and her eyes got even rounder before she dropped to her knees and pulled open the flaps of the box.

When she saw what was inside her gasp was deep and her hands flew to her mouth. She looked up at him in complete shock before reaching reverently into the box to take out one of the books that sat inside.

“Books.” She whispered, as she stared at the paperback in her hands. She reached into the box again and pulled out another book and then another and another until her arms were full of them.

She looked up at him, tears falling and her gaze rapturous. “Oh my god, Dean.”

Dean felt his face flush and he looked away, crossing his arms over his chest. “Just figured the classroom could use ‘em and they were just sitting there on the shelves. There’s a bunch of kids books underneath,” he said pointing inside the box. “And paper and pencils and some crayons, a few coloring books. There weren’t many of them so-”

He was interrupted as Y/N dropped the books back into the box and launched herself at him. She wrapped her arms around his neck and squeezed tight. He stood stock still for a minute before he patted her back awkwardly and dropped his arms back to his side.

She pulled back and brushed away her happy tears, sniffling loudly. “Sorry. I just…” She knelt down again and picked up another book, holding it tight to her chest. She shook her head. “You have no idea how much I’ve missed books. It’s been years since I’ve even seen one let alone had the chance to read one.”

She reached in for one of the children’s books and laughed. “Oh my gosh, the kids are gonna be ecstatic.”

Dean shrugged, thoroughly embarrassed by Y/N’s joy and gratitude. He cleared his throat before speaking. “There’s a limited supply of paper and pencils, and I have no idea how long it will be before we find more, if we ever do, so…”

He trailed off and Y/N put the books back into the box and folded the flaps closed again. “So, we’ll be sure to write very tiny, erase a lot, and wear the pencils down to little nubs.” She said as she stood and bent to heft the box up from the floor. Dean stepped forward to grab it from her as she staggered slightly beneath its weight.

“You’ll break your back.” Dean barked at her as he reached for the box.

But she just shook her head and turned away with the box still in her arms. “N’ah I’m stronger than I look.” She said, huffing and puffing as she dropped it onto the table.

Dean shook his head. Yeah, I bet you are. He thought.

After a moment Y/N turned and walked slowly back towards him. “So, I can’t exactly buy you dinner as a thank you. But if you bring your rations over to our tent, I can cook them all up for us.”

She smiled at him, friendly and sweet, but Dean was backing away. “No, that’s not necessary.”

“I know it isn’t, but it will make me feel good to do this one small favor for you in return for this amazingness.” She said with a wave towards the box.

Dean planned to say no, had it on the tip of his tongue but when he opened his mouth what came out was, “Okay.”

So barely an hour later he found himself sitting at her table with dinner laid out in front of him. It was a sufficiently celebratory meal of salted venison from an eight point buck the camp hunters had taken down in early summer, boiled potatoes, and a can of green beans that was older than Emma.

It was the best meal Dean had eaten in a long time.

After the food was finished and the dishes were washed, Y/N made them a cup of coffee and he sat drinking it as she settled Emma into bed with a kiss. His stomach was full of decent food, the coffee smelled old but still strong, and the sound of Y/N’s soft voice as she tucked her daughter in, was incredibly soothing. He found himself relaxing into his chair in a way he hadn’t in a very long time. His muscles lost some of their rigidity and he breathed out a long sigh, as though he’d been holding his breath for too long.

After a few minutes Y/N came back to the table and sat down with her own soft exhale. She took a sip of her coffee and then looked at Dean over the rim of her tin cup. “You know, I don’t think you really understand what you’ve done here.”

Dean cocked his head and raised an eyebrow, questioning her. She smiled and set down her cup, shifting slightly in her chair.

“Since all of this started, we’ve been on the move, Emma and I. In the beginning, when Emma was still a baby, I’d come across different groups of people and we’d travel together for a while or we’d manage to hole up somewhere for the winter and wait out the cold together. But inevitably the groups always fell away; sometimes we’d just decide to go in separate directions, but sometimes animosity or greed would take over and violence would erupt. People would fight over who was in charge and they’d fight over resources.” Y/N shook her head. “It almost always ended up a disaster.”

She shrugged. “So after a while, I just lit out on my own with Emma. It was scary as hell, of course - no back up, no partners, all on my own with a four year old. But it also meant no one stealing my stuff, or throwing me to the wolves at the first sign of trouble.”

She took another sip of coffee and Dean wondered at the shadows in her usually bright eyes. What stories in her past had created them?

Her voice was soft when she continued. “It’s been incredibly hard and there’s been,” her eyelashes fluttered and closed, “there's been a lot of bad.”

She set down her cup and sat back in her chair, rubbing at her eyes with her fingers like she was scratching out the images behind her eyelids.

When she looked at him again, her eyes were soft and warm. “So, to come here, to see what you’ve accomplished in just a few years?” Her voice was full of wonder. “Dean, it’s like a miracle. I mean you’ve made it safe here, at least a hell of a lot safer than anywhere else out there - there are guards protecting us! People work together, contribute their skills and strengths for the benefit of the group as well as themselves.”

She shook her head. “I haven’t seen anything like it in a very long time. What you’ve created here is an oasis.”

Dean snorted at that. “Oasis?” He asked incredulously. Her praise and wonderment made him feel an itchy kind of awkwardness. He didn’t deserve it.

But Y/N was nodding solemnly. “Yes. It’s a safe haven in a world filled with evil. What would you call it?”

Dean took a gulp of coffee and then licked his lips, looking at her for a moment before speaking. “Y/N this is only an oasis in the sense that it’s a mirage in a desert; it’s an illusion. We’re managing to get by through lucky choices and good timing. We push through from day to day, but I’m telling you this whole place could fall apart in an instant. One long, bad, winter, or one coordinated attack from another camp or a pack of Croats, and we’re done.”

He paused to try and let that sink in before continuing. “And the survivors here work together because it’s beneficial to them. But if things get desperate again,” he looked at her pointedly, “don’t think for one second that they'll hesitate to throw you to the wolves like all the others.” He shrugged. “It’s human nature, survival of the fittest, and anyone who thinks otherwise is gonna get trampled.”

He said it as a warning, still determined to dislodge the Pollyanna ideal of good and virtuous humanity from her mind.

But Y/N just smiled and leaned across the table to squeeze his hand. “Guess we’ll see. But in the meantime, you should be proud. No matter what happens, you’ve done good.”

Dean swallowed down the rest of his coffee in one gulp and stood up, pulling his hand away from her warm touch. He was desperate to get away from the softness and understanding in her gaze. He thanked her for cooking dinner and left quickly, promising himself as he walked back to his tent that he wasn’t going to do that again.

But as with most things to do with Y/N that decision didn’t last long, and soon enough that one evening turned into a bit of a ritual. Every few days or so Dean would show up with some of his rations and Y/N would combine them with what they had, and they’d all eat together at their tiny table.

Every time he left her tent, he told himself he’d had his last meal there with Y/N and Emma. Yet within a few days, he’d be back again. He told himself it was just something to break the monotony of camp life, just something a little different from the ordinary.

But the truth was he was beginning to crave the evenings spent across from Y/N, listening to her rattle on about her students and their achievements, or else answering her seemingly endless questions about the camp and how it had come to be. He even enjoyed listening to her talk to Emma, telling her stories before she tucked her in for the night.

Once the little girl was asleep, Dean usually hightailed it out of there, because without the kid as a buffer it became much harder to ignore Y/N’s inviting lips and tempting curves.

But one night, three weeks after returning home from the raid, Y/N followed him outside as he abruptly left the tent.

“Dean.” She called after him.

The sun had set almost an hour before and the night was dark and cold; Dean returned to her side and admonished her. “It’s freezing out here, go back inside.”

Y/N just rubbed her hands up and down her arms and shrugged. “I’m fine.”

He shook his head at her stubbornness, and then waited silently. When she didn’t say anything right away he spread his arms wide.

“What?” He asked impatiently.

“I just…” Y/N stuttered for a moment. “I just wanted to say that I really like when you come for dinner.”

Dean clenched his jaw as she looked up at him with heat in her gaze, an invitation in her eyes, plain as day. He told himself to walk away but instead, he raised his hand to trail his fingers down her cheek.

“You should go inside.” He warned her again, even as he lowered his head towards her. “S’cold.”

Y/N shook her head. “I’m very warm.” She smiled and licked her lips and it was his undoing.

He yanked her up against him and crushed her lips with his own. He plundered her mouth with his tongue, inhaling her sweet scent and hardening at the way she clutched the front of his jacket and whimpered softly. He moved his hands so that one clutched at her waist and the other one grabbed hold of the back of her head so he could keep her pressed to him tightly.

He didn't know how long he would have continued kissing her, or whether he might have taken things even further. But luckily there was a loud noise of something crashing somewhere in camp, followed by laughter.

The sound was like a bucket of cold water being poured on him and Dean ripped himself away from Y/N's mouth. They were both breathing heavily, panting really.

“Fuck.” Dean swore roughly before he turned abruptly and left. He fully admitted to himself that this time, he was definitely running away.

***

Dean barely slept and woke up the next day berating himself for the night before. For fuck’s sake he’d been making out with Y/N with her kid just on the other side of a canvas wall - kissing her in the wide open, where any other camper might have walked by. He didn’t need things to be more complicated than they were already.

As the morning wore on, he made up his mind to talk to Y/N that very afternoon. He'd just tell her straight out that what happened between them just couldn't happen again. It was only going to confuse things and make everything harder than it needed to be.

He nodded; he could do this. He was practical and he didn't hem and haw or tiptoe around things. He'd just tell her straight out how things were going to be.

He knew she'd be in the big cabin as the school day ended, so he walked over and stepped inside the door, hoping she'd be almost done for the day.

Ever since he brought her the books, she'd been reading to the kids at the end of every school day. Parents had started swinging by the school, ostensibly to meet their kids, but really, they wanted to watch their kids' faces and listen to their giggles as Y/N read the stories in funny voices and occasionally got the kids to join her in acting out silliness from the books.

But the crowd of parents and kids had gotten a bit too big for the tiny schoolroom, so on the last day of every week, Y/N had taken to reading to the kids and parents together in the big cabin. The adults usually sat on the floor behind the kids, keeping their hands busy with mending clothes or knitting, or else they stood at a table and worked on something like repairing holes in tents or making snares for the hunters. The work allowed them to justify their enjoyment of the stories.

As Dean walked inside now, Y/N was finishing up the storybook in her hand. He could see it was The Paper Bag Princess and Y/N was on the last page.

“‘Ronald’, said Elizabeth, ‘your clothes are really pretty and your hair is very neat.” Y/N read aloud in Elizabeth’s decisive voice.

“You look like a real prince. But you,” Y/N paused for effect, “are a bum.’”

All the kids were giggling as she read the last line.

“They didn't get married after all.”

The kids clapped and even the parents were chuckling at the way the paper bag princess had put the snooty prince in his place.

“I love that story!!” A little redheaded girl in the front gushed.

“It's my mommy's favorite story.” Emma said loudly. “Right Mommy?”

Y/N nodded. “When I was your age for sure.”

Dean pushed away from the wall he was leaning on, trying to signal Y/N so she'd hurry up and finish. But the little girl in the front demanded her full attention as she bounced up to lean against Y/N's knees where she sat in the chair.

“Cause your mommy read it to you?”

Dean was seriously considering ordering everyone out. He wanted to get this over with.

But Y/N's next words stopped him dead in his tracks.

She was shaking her head as she tucked the little girl's red hair behind her ear. “No, my mommy passed away a long time ago when I was just a baby. So she never really got to read me stories.”

Y/N kept talking, but Dean only heard a hot, pulsing, rushing sound in his ears. A million thoughts were slamming through his mind at once as he felt a cold shiver run through him.

He yelled over the sound of the people around him beginning to chatter and get ready to leave.

“How?”

Y/N looked up at his bellow, her face shocked. “What?”

Dean was aware of his surroundings only just enough to brusquely order everyone out of the cabin.

“Now!” He barked and the mood in the room shifted quickly as parents grabbed up their children and gave The Boss a wide berth as his eyes burned at Y/N like green fire.

Everyone disappeared and it was just Y/N, Dean and Emma left.

Dean felt his heart hammering in his chest as he took a step back from where she stood.

Y/N's face was completely confused and clearly perplexed. “Dean what-”

He cut her off. “How?” He bellowed again before swallowing and asking in a slightly quieter tone. “How did your mother die when you were a baby?”

Y/N shook her head. “Why? What are you-”

“Answer me.” Dean's voice wasn't loud, but his words were clipped and he could hear the steel behind his words, feel the cold seeping into his bones as the tumblers in his mind fell into place, opening the lock concealing the reason behind Y/N’s miraculous survival of the virus.

Y/N blinked rapidly for a moment before exhaling slowly. “It was a - a fire. Some kind of electrical short or something.”

“In your nursery.” Dean said softly.

Y/N shrugged, her face scrunched up in confusion. “I'm not sure. My dad didn't really like to talk about it.”

As he stood staring at the woman with the bloodshot eyes, a moment from so long ago, once again from that first time they'd faced the Croatoan virus, materialized in his memory.

Again his brother's face bloomed in his mind, and he heard his own voice speaking.

“I swear I'm gonna lose sleep over this one. I mean why here, why now?”

And Sam's bewildered reply. “And why was I immune?”

Well now he knew why his brother had been immune. Because Yellow Eyes had wanted him to be, to make him a better soldier, a better, more powerful psychic to lead his demon army. And of course, he’d needed to be sure Lucifer's true vessel was strong and able enough to withstand the demon germ warfare he planned to release upon the world as a way to kickstart the apocalypse.

Dean stared at Y/N, angry beyond belief. Angry at her and what she really was, angry at himself for taking so long to figure it out and for falling for her game, and unbelievably angry at the universe for proving once again that it was laughing at him.

His voice was ice when he spoke. “What kind of psychic are you? What can you do?” He shook his head. “What have you done already?"

Jensen RPF and Any/All Characters:

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#dean winchester x reader #endverse!dean #endverse!dean x reader #dean winchester fan fic #endverse #endverse series #endverse!dean series #dean winchester angst #dean winchester smut #dean winchester fluff

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ryuzakemo128 · 2 months

Text

Cara Mia (My Beloved)

Pairing: Billionaire! Joel Miller x Alessia Romano (Joel Miller x F! OC)

Content Warning: Cussing, Angst, no outbreak, post break-up, age gap (Joel is 55-56. Alessia is 28 turning 29), Jealous Joel.

Indirect Character Mention: F! Reader Supermodel(21yrs)

Words: 1021

Summary:

Masterlist Dividers

Note: Mood board is for Alessia Romano. Alessia Romano is an OC. Not a canon character. Sneak peek of Upcoming One-shot with bonus mood board.

Alessia had decided to start up an onlyfans ever since he broke up with her, she needed the extra cash. It was one of the few ways she could earn it without the extra leg work. She spent that entire week getting ready for it, setting up her profile, taking photos and videos, and planning her content.

He broke up with her to go out with a young supermodel. She said go ahead and do it. Just don’t be shocked when I move on from you to someone else better than you.

Was it petty of her to add those last few words? Yes.

Did she care how it impacted him? Fuck no.

Why should she care about him after she ‘set him free’?

Joel decided the best course of action after she disappeared for a week was to yell at her, who remained passed out in her lime green hammock.

“Where the hell have you been?” he roared, the rage boiling within him mixing with the worry that had consumed him during her absence.

“Well. You said fuck off, right?” Alessia answered, causing him to grit his teeth even harder.

She took it literal as possible and fucked off, right after he told her to.

She didn't have a couch in her living room, but she did have a lime green hammock. Not only that, but she must have passed out on it after passing out after four cocktails at the bar.

The television still had The Simpsons playing, the DVDs on her coffee table against the red brick wall, the black curtains shut tight blocking the sun from taking a peek inside.

“You're drunk,” Joel stated, the disbelief in his voice palpable.

“Hungover, it means I was drunk 𝓎𝑒𝓈𝓉𝑒𝓇𝒹𝒶𝓎” she corrected him with a smirk, though her voice was groggy, her eyes were still half-closed.

Joel's eyes narrowed as he stepped closer to her, the wooden floorboards creaking under his weight. He grabbed the edge of the hammock, giving it a rough shake. “Do you have any idea what I've been through the past week?”

“Hey, you were the one who wanted to break up. Don't come walking over to my place because you saw me talking to another guy.” Alessia retorted. “What's the matter, your 21-year-old supermodel girlfriend not good enough for you?”

Alessia groaned as she got up to shove her pyjama top on, a men's graphic t-shirt with marvel heroes plastered over the front of it. The same one she wears to bed most nights. She didn't bother putting her pyjama bottoms back on as she walked into her small, tiny, kitchenette, taking out the leftover pizza from last night to have for breakfast.

“What's your problem?” Joel followed her, the anger still resonating in his voice.

Alessia ignored him to warm up her pizza, getting her leftover soft drink from the fridge and Joel continued to speak, “You're not even sorry? Do you know how worried I was? I called everyone, I looked everywhere!”

“Why the fuck do you care?” She snapped back at him. “You have everything you want. Leave me the fuck alone.”

“I care because you're still important to me, whether you like it or not,” Joel said, his voice cracking.

He slammed his fist on the kitchen counter, making the plates rattle. “I thought something had happened to you. I can't just turn that off because you decided to ghost me after I made a mistake!”

Joel had been told that Alessia started an onlyfans that week, she didn't know how he found or who told him about it. Was it Thomas? Did he tell him? Was it Ellie? Did she do it to spite her? Was it his new girlfriend that told him about it? Who told him? Why did they tell him about it? What did they have to gain from telling him what she was doing now?

Joel spoke up again, much to her dismay, “What's with the onlyfans bullshit, huh? Did you do that to get back at me?”

“No, I did it because I needed the money, and it’s my body, Joel. I can do what I want with it. If it’s not with you, then it’s with someone else. I’m sorry if that bruises your little man ego, but that’s not my problem anymore. You chose the supermodel over me, remember?”

Joel’s jaw tightened as he watched her take a bite of the pizza, the cheese stretching out in a long string. “So, you’re just going to whore yourself out because I made a mistake? That’s your solution?”

“Did I hurt your small feelings? ”Alessia sarcastically remarked. “Did I bruise that pathetic small ego of yours? I have a date this evening, so you better shove off before I call security on your dumb ass.”

A date? Joel was caught off guard by her nonchalant announcement. “You're seeing someone else already?” he asked, his voice laced with both anger and hurt.

“A great guy from where I grew up in Italy.” Alessia answered.

Joel felt a pang of jealousy stab through his chest. “Italy? How long have you been seeing him?”

“He's the guy that helps me with my onlyfans content.” Alessia answered indirectly.

This revelation hit Joel like a ton of bricks. The rage that had been simmering inside him began to boil over. He couldn't believe that not only had she moved on, but she was also flaunting it in his face.

He stepped closer to her, his eyes burning with fury. “You're going to let some stranger film you? After everything we've been through?”

“He is most definitely not the guy filming.” Alessia implied he was the guy acting in said onlyfans content with a smirk on her face, which only added more fuel to Joel's rage.

“You're fucking him?” Joel's voice grew louder, his face contorted into a mask of rage.

“Why do you care?” Alessia walked to her bedroom to get her outfit ready for that evening. “I'm finally moving on. You should be happy for me.” Alessia walked into her closet looking through her black dresses to wear that night.

She finally settled on her A-line black dress with leg slit, batwing sleeves, and bat hem line. She had bought it from a designer store for this exact purpose.

“You don't get it, do you?” Joel followed her, his voice filled with a mix of anger and desperation. “You're not just anyone to me, Alessia. You can't just replace me with some random guy from your past!”

“Watch me.”

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icansoiwill · 1 year

Text

Heart of Stone Chapter Four: Where one ends, Another Begins

~Summary: Joel's temperament will probably be the death of him. Even with his walls up so high, you still are tender with him. He fights with himself even more because of this, still wondering why he is so drawn to you.

~Pairing: Joel Miller x f!Reader

~Words: 3k

~Warnings: some slight similarities to the show that I thought would fit (I do not own the copyright), cursing (if that bothers you), mention of death, mention of cheating, (there are others I'm sure, but I can't think of them of course)

~A/N: So since it took me so long to do the other chapter, I thought I'd post this early. I also feel a lot better to write too. Also, this is a long one. I don't know how I was able to write this much, usually, I don't lol. I have some ideas for other fics as well. So I'll be posting those next too.

Previous Chapters: ~Chapter Three

The city was a lot rougher than Joel remembered from the last run over a year ago. A lot more buildings had fallen, more overgrowth of the various plants, and fewer clickers than he remembered. The lack of clickers and runners put him on edge.

“You doing okay back here?” You had asked him, slightly removing him from his thoughts.

“Yeah” He grunts in response avoiding eye contact.

“Okay, just checking.” You say with a brush of annoyance.

He knew that he wasn’t making a good impression on you. Not like it was a priority though. Honestly, he probably would have rather you stayed back at the QZ. You being here meant that there was another person to have to worry about. He didn’t want that. Ellie was so all over the place for him that she alone created enough concern for safety on this trip.

And, you still had his jacket, from the night it rained, tied around your waist now. Which annoyed him only slightly. He didn’t want the jacket back by no means. You looked too good in it when you put it on last night. Joel even found it adorable when you tried brushing out the wrinkles that had been there forever. But, he felt that he shouldn’t have given it to you. It made it hard for him to concentrate on the surroundings in front of him. However, out of not wasting time, he gave you his. But damn, when you put it on… There was something about it. It was just a jacket. But you, in his clothes? He wanted more of it.

Joel realized his mind was wandering more than he wanted it to after that little interaction you gave him. Come on Joel, focus. He adjusted his shoulders and his hand placement on the gun. Walking along the downtown Boston streets, he looked to the left and to the right. Scanning the surroundings. When he looked in front of him he saw the connection you were making with Ellie. He hoped for your sake that, you weren’t getting too attached. Nevertheless, when Ellie found that joke book you two couldn’t stop giggling. Joel wouldn’t dare tell a soul, but he liked the sound of your laugh. It lingered in his mind, bouncing around in there like it was a boomerang, echoing in his ears.

Joel still couldn’t understand how you had such a hold on him. He felt disgusted with himself for thinking this way about you with Tess still being an obligation to him. One thing Joel vowed to himself was that he would never cheat. Joel did like Tess, and liked what she could give him. But it didn’t feel like it was enough anymore. Joel began to realize that his feelings for Tess weren’t strong enough anymore. He knew that before he could even think about getting to know you more, he’d need to break it off with Tess. He felt drawn to you, since the day he went to meet Tess after her shift and Joel did want anything to get in the way of getting to know you.

Joel looked to the front of the line that had formed between the four of you. Tess is taking point. She looked back at Joel with a blank expression. He knew she was still frustrated with him after what happened at the museum. Ellie got scratched. He felt that he had the right to question whether or not he was putting himself in danger by taking her. Just because some kid says something, doesn’t mean it’s true. But Tess got annoyed, saying “Can’t you just take the win?” He wanted more than anything to take what good he could, but something seemed off.

Joel only realized that Tess had fallen back and you had taken point after Tess tried talking to him.

“Hey, did you hear me?” Tess questioned.

“Huh? Oh, no.” Joel replied

“I asked if everything was okay with you.”

“Oh, yeah. I’m good.”

“You just seem… distracted? Maybe? I don’t know. You just haven’t acted like this before.”

“I’m good Tess, really.” Joel tried convincing her.

“Tell me. What’s really going on? Does this have to do with her? Do you like her or something?” Tess questioned flatly, “If you do, just tell me. It’s not like we were exclusive.”

“Let’s talk later. Now really isn’t the time for something like this.” Joel sighed. He’s not trying to prolong the inevitable. He’s not the type to string someone along. He just needs to be able to keep everyone safe and having conversations like these wasn’t going to help anyone keep a clear mind. Tess sighs and walks back up to the front to take point.

By now, Joel knows they are close to the capitol building. As he scans the area again he sees plenty of Firefly symbols around. There are barricades up and barbed wire wrapped around planks to create small forts. They come up to the end of a street as they take a left.

There it is the Capitol Building.

Joel catches up to Tess and he takes point. He leads them halfway up the street where they stop behind a yellow Volkswagen Beetle. Joel watches for a second. It’s quiet. Too Quiet.

“Where are they?” Tess whispered Joel.

“I don’t know. Stay here.” He replied

Joel felt all three sets of eyes on him as he moved towards one of the big transport trucks. He made his way slowly and once he got there, open the passenger door in a swift motion, immediately pointing the gun into the cabin. Joel knew something must've gone awry. He saw blood spatter all over the seats and windshield. He turned around. Making his way to the other side of the truck.

“Stay there” he mouthed to them.

A foul stench met his nose as he moved to the driver's side of the vehicle. Joel brought his guard up even more once he saw the body lying halfway under the truck. Sprawled out with a used fire extinguisher over their flattened head. Joel grimaced at the sight. He was never going to get used to it. But he pushed on, making his way to the back of the truck where the latched doors were. He didn’t hear the noises of a clicker or a person, but that also could mean nothing. Joel slowly unlatched the door and swung it open.

Nothing.

“Joel?” You called for him.

“Everything’s fine,” Joel replied.

“What the fuck is going on?” Tess asked

“I don’t know,” Joel told her.

“They went inside” Ellie states from behind him.

Joel looks to where Ellie is and sees the trail of blood. Joel or you don’t have time to react before Tess is grabbing Ellie by the wrist forcefully. Pulling her into the building.

“Tess!” Joel calls out

“Come on!” Tess yells back.

Joel and you run after her. Tess has already opened the doors to the building before Joel or you even have time to make it up the stairs. You both walk in and see the wreckage. Bodies lying everywhere. Boxes and cargo rummaged through.

“This had to be FEDRA,” you tell Joel. Joel nods in agreement.

“What the fuck? Something has to be here. Something, come ON!” Tess yells as she is rummaging through everything.

“Give it up Tess, we're done,” Joel tells her.

“Ellie, where did Marlene say she was taking you?” Tess asks, totally ignoring Joel.

“Uhh, I don’t know somewhere out west,” Ellie replies.

“Then one of them has got to have something right?” Tess begins patting down the cold bodies.

“Tess, there isn’t anything you can do,” You tell her, “You did everything you could.”

“Joel, Are you going to help?” Tess asks ignoring you now as well.

“No! I’m not going to help because there isn’t anything more for us to do. It’s over” Joel explains.

“It can’t be over,” Tess says getting up to face him.

“We have to go home,” Joel tells her.

“That’s not my fucking home!” Tess yells, “I’m staying here. You know our luck had to run out sooner or later.” She says more calmly now.

“Shit,” you say.

“Fuck” Ellie says, “she’s infected.”

Joel turns to Ellie in disbelief. Why would she say something like that? Tess is too careful to get infected. But there’s silence from Tess. Joel turns back to look at Tess. Tears are welling up in her eyes. He looks down at her hand to see it shaking uncontrollably.

Oh, fuck. Ellies right.

“Let me see,” Joel asks. Tess doesn’t move. “Let me see!” He yells now.

Tess grips her fingers around the right side of the collar of her shirt and jacket, pulling it to expose the scratch she has. Joel can’t believe his eyes. It’s already dark red.

How did he miss this? How did she keep it from him? Did this happen back at the museum?

“Oops, right,” Tess says taking a step toward Joel. Joel makes eye contact with her now. Tess tries to walk up to him but out of fear, Joel takes a step back from her. There’s no fucking way this could happen.

“Take your bandage off Ellie,” Tess says. She walks over to her and pushed up the sleeve of the jacket.

“Look, Joel, you see this. This is proof. She’s immune. I got this 2 hours ago and it’s already worse.” Tess tells him, “Take her to Bill. He’ll know what to do.”

“No, there’s no way I can do that. They won’t do it. You know Bill” Joel tells her

“Yes you can and they will.“ Tess reassures.

“No, I can-“ Joel gets cut off by Tess.

“Just do it, Joel! I have never asked you of anything, much less feel the same way about me. You need to do this for me. Please it’s the last thing I’ll ever ask of you Joel” Tess pleads. Joel feels a jab in his heart when Tess tells him this. He feels more guilt than ever now.

Suddenly a truck pulls up. Joel sees you run to the window to take a peak.

“It’s FEDRA” You them.

“I’ll hold them off. Just go!” Tess tells Joel and the other two.

Tess begins spilling gasoline all over the floor. Joel can hear the crash of the bins and the smell filled his nose. He swiftly grabs Ellie by the forearm and pushes the small of your back to indicate that you guys need to run. You turn to the doors that were behind you. Opening them to let Joel and Ellie through. You run ahead of them looking for the exit as Joel tries to pick up the pace with Ellie fighting against him.

“No, Joel! Don’t leave her!” Ellie yells.

Ellie fighting his grip only makes him hang on tighter. He makes sure to catch up to you, following you through the back doors of the capitol building. You push them shut to slow FEDRA down. But, Joel knows that it won’t matter. He knows what Tess is about to do. Ellie isn’t fighting him anymore, but running ahead in between the short distance of you and him. You, Ellie, and Him make it far enough out to be considered safe-ish. Then…

BOOM!

Joel grabs both you and Ellie to crouch down. In the same instance, Joel turns to look behind him. Flames billow out from the building at all sides, anywhere the fire can reach oxygen. Painful cries from within the building are heard. Joel doesn’t know what prompts him but he turns to look at you. Tears are building up in your eyes. Another jab at his heart surfaces. He knew he would never want to see you like this again. However, he turns around and walks on. Leaving you and Ellie to stand there in the horror of the events that just happened.

______________

A day had passed and we are barely out of Boston, just now getting into the suburbs. Joel is acting completely numbed and shut down after what happened with Tess at the capitol building. He’s talking less, not like he did much before, and he is much more cautious. Now more focused on getting Ellie out of his life. I had tried talking to him yesterday, maybe taking his mind off things.

“Hey, I just want-“ I began to tell him.

“You need to take point” Joel harshly interrupts making no eye contact with you.

He hasn’t spoken a word since then, only communicating in hand signals if he hears something or when he asks for the map. I’ve made sure to keep point, definitely avoiding going and talking to him again. I wanted to be there for him. I already miss Tess too. She was as close of a friend as I had gotten in the last year. It hurt me to avoid him like this. But, from what little I knew about Joel, I got the understanding that it was probably good for him that it be this way for now.

Walking our way through the suburbs of Boston, we made stops at a few houses to get some supplies, definitely some food. We were running out already because neither Joel nor I brought enough food for any trip longer than a day. I was starving. I was trying not to think about it because the more I focused on it the hungrier I felt.

While being at the front I made sure to keep my head up looking around. Checking my surroundings. Occasionally catching a glimpse of Joel because I couldn’t help myself. I wanted to make sure he was okay. I felt the need to look out for him since he was looking out for us. I go to take a peek at Joel out of the corner of my eye. This time when I go to look over at Joel, he is stopped. He turns to look at me.

“Let’s look through this one.” Joel gestures to the house he’s in front of.

With most of the other houses looking like they had been bombed, I’m Joel wanted to check if there was anything good. We make our way into the house. Going through the front door there was an opening to the living room to the right and stairs to the left. A somewhat long hallway connected to the kitchen. Joel goes to move down the hallway.

“Check the upstairs.” Joel directed.

I pull out my gun and make my way up slowly. At the top of the stairs is a hallway with rooms. The first door is closed, so I brace myself to the right of the door, taking the handle slowly and turning it. When I open it, I point my gun in.

Nothing.

It was just the bathroom. I check the rest of the rooms. Going through all of them, looking for anything useful. More weapons, bullets, maybe some medicine. I found myself in the master bedroom looking through the drawers. I could hear light footsteps making their way closer to me. I look up to find Ellie going into the kid's bedroom. I keep searching around when I hear Ellie getting excited.

“No way! I found another one!” Ellie said enthusiastically. I’m guessing it had to be one of those comic books. I kept looking for something, anything. With no luck, I go to walk out of the room. I run into a familiar chest. Again.

“We’ve got to stop meeting like this” I joke sarcastically with Joel. Maybe trying to chip at his

There is no space between us when I look up to make eye contact with him. He’s looking down at me. I can see his brown irises clearly.

“Did you find anything?” Joel asks me, not breaking eye contact. I can see him searching my eyes.

“No,” I tell him almost meekly, “But I think Ellie did,” I say gesturing to the room behind him.

Joel turns to go to the kid's room. It’s decorated with dirty trophies and faded ribbons from various sports. Basketball, softball, soccer.

Man, this kid was active.

Pictures of teams were plastered all over bulletin boards. I turn to look at Joel. I watched him as he looks around the room for a second. I see a twinge of pain come across his face.

Out of all the places, why did this affect him?

I could tell Joel wanted to get out of there. He moves past me with determination to leave.

“Come on, Ellie. We got to go.” Joel tells her as he bushes by swiftly.

Ellie goes first to leave the room. I go after her. When we make it down the stairs and Joel, with his back to us, is waiting on the front porch. His silhouette looks intimidating and inviting all at the same time. If Ellie wasn’t here you might’ve made a move. But now isn’t the time for that kind of thing. Ellie makes her way around him and goes down the stairs of the porch. Before he takes his first step, I come up behind him and put a hand on his shoulder. He almost flinches at the touch. His head turned in my direction.

“Look, I know you don’t want to talk to me. But, I’m here.” I tell him looking directly into his eyes.

He gently nods his head, keeping eye contact. After that, I move to catch up to Ellie at the end of the sidewalk.

“Looks like you got some reading to do. Huh?” I ask her.

“Yeah, I can’t wait to start reading this. It’s the next one in the series too.” Ellie says excitedly.

“Let me know what happens”

I walk ahead to lead the way. We still had a long way to go and it was going to get dark in the next couple of hours. I wanted to make sure we at least made it to the city limit of Boston. This trip was going to be a long, tiring one.

Hopefully, I can get Joel to warm up to Ellie in the least. Doing that will make these things easier. I’m sure time will tell if they get along. Maybe I can convince Ellie to tell him some of those puns from the book she found. Some of them are actually funny. Maybe Joel will think the same.

I felt my stomach grumble again.

Hopefully, we can find some food too…

#Joel miller #Joel miller x reader #Ellie #Tess #The last of us #Joel tlou #tlou #Tlou hbo #Joel x reader #Ellie williams #Daddy Joel #Pedro #Pedro pascal #Pedro pascal x reader #Y/n #Daddy issues #Pedro Pascal is daddy #Daddy Pascal

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millermenapologist · 5 months

Note

I've just came from ao3 heyy i have to tell you here since I'm too shy to say there

1- I spent the whole day dedicated to read your chapter, I'm not exagerating. Your chapters are so extraordinarily big omg. And I'm not complaining, I wish fic writers wrote chapters like that.

2-Ellie's relationship with joel is so good❤️even though you write on ellie's pov, the way you show to us every aspect of joel is like we're seeing his pov too!! And I love how she really sees ellie as his baby daughter, like she's really his youngest. And I love how patient he is too her even when she's all over the place, like when she was trying to convince him she's a bad person and has bad thoughts, and he just sits there with her and very calmly asks her to tell him what are this bad thoughts. It reminds me of a fic I loved on ao3 about the last of us called "what dads do" (sadly never had an ending🤧). Also, have I already said that is really cute this habit of his when he puts her in his lap or cradles her most of the time? Or when she does it herself like it's the most normal thing on this world? It's so cute and such an innocent way of showing affection❤️

2- i don't know how to feel about sarah and her. Part of me is still getting used to the idea of girlfriends that live in the same house because they have the same dad, but other part of me enjoys the whole dynamic. Also, I have to admit It's very tempting to ship them both when they have such a chemistry like that, i mean, goody-two-shoes predator killer and her cute little girlfriend?? Idk if you're planning to weite dina and ellie as a couple in the future, but I guess you will have a lot of work to convince us that they have more chemistry as sarah and ellie🤭 can't wait to see what happens next

3- did ellie had a psychotic attack or something like that? Joel and sarah are not the only ones who were like "wtf" when reading that, and although the scene of joel carrying her like a toddler why she was screaming "traitooorr!!!" on the stairs was a bit funny, I'm worried about her.

4- I got sad for tommy boy :( he seemed so genuinely bothered about the fact that maria considered even for a moment that he would cover up his brother for supposedly hurting a little girl. Hope he gets his happy ending, whether with Maria, or someone else... Me... Heard something? Me neither

5- can you at least tell me something about next chapter?🫠

Aw, thank you for coming here, then! ଘ(੭ˊᵕˋ)੭* ੈ✩‧˚

I swear that they don't start off this long, when i plan them in my notebook, I'm just the definition of unrepentant yapper (⁄ ⁄•⁄ω⁄•⁄ ⁄)

Ok, listen: canonically speaking, Joel always keeps Sarah very close (she leans on him while they watch the movie and then falls asleep on him, he lifts her up and carries her around rather than waking her up), and then he keeps touching her face to make sure she's okay; and as soon as Ellie gets comfortable with Joel, she starts touching him too, like when they're on the horse or when she almost ends him by giving him that huge ass dose of penicillin (pls don't inject penicillin like that, you're gonna die). It's not my fault if they're touchy people in the most literal sense of the word. Ellie saw that man and decided he's free real estate, and Joel was just born to be a girl dad, so any girl that enters his hope is at least half-adopted by him. I am only keeping the characters true to their original essences uwu

For this fic, no Dina/Ellie, but they're definitely gonna be friends in the epilogue. Shenanigans might ensue (they will definitely ensue. Joel's gonna end up with so much more white hair). If we're talking about "future" fics, then... idk yet? For my birthday I plan to post a one shot that's set between the farm chapter and the Santa Barbara one of TLOU2, so the Ellie/Dina relationship is gonna be talked about for sure, and the other long I have planned, Anklebiter, has 14yo Ellie grow a massive crush for Sarah (who, sadly, is ~30, so definitely not interested in pursuing a relationship with her), but some other story idea that's right for them might arise ღゝ◡╹ )ノ♡

Not really. It's more what happens when you don't sleep for extended periods of time: you start losing your mind. You can start hallucinating, seeing distorted things, etc. At my first big girl job, I was in the office at 10am and wouldn't go home until 10pm, if not 11 or even later (and then I still had to get home, which required about an hour). By the end of the first week I was so overworked and exhausted that I'd wake up in the middle of the night, standing, half-hallucinating half-dreaming that I was back in the office. Sometimes I'd wander in other rooms too, and at some point I started seeing "things" in the edges of my vision and other things like that. It was terrifying. It's pretty much why sleep deprivation can be used as a torture method.

Well, in her defense, Maria sees a lot of bad people too, and has to deal with their families. Plenty of people think that keeping it within the family is the best option, so that's what she went for. Hehe, don't worry about his ending ┬┴┬┴┤ʕ•ᴥ├┬┴┬┴

Uhmm... Ellie and Danica are going to have a one-on-one conversation, Dina's gonna be freed from being grounded, aaaaand some honesty is gonna grace the Miller House. Not once, but twice! Crazy, I know!

#shoot for the stars #answer: anon #beekeper answers

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macbeth-s · 4 years

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When I think about him, all I see is open skin, slack jaw, insides out. I wont let her remember me that way, I’d rather die alone. Did she die alone? Was her God with her? Was he with Joel? More than I was with him?

#tlou2 #joel miller #ellie williams #tlou #the last of us part two #blood tw #still not over that ellie saw this still not over that this is all she'll think about #despite the happy memories and for years after the epilogue this was it for her #that post about joels thoughts and whether he was worried about ellie #and whether he failed her its that and ellie probably thought the same #she saw him look at her and its a question #of whether he saw her and if he was worried or if he even knew it was her #dina tells her about her sister and her religion and the comfort it brings #and ellie has never thought about it much #but believes maybe someone was there for joel #because the alternative is him being alone and she hates that thought #it comes with wondering what they felt and questioning so much #and ellie doesn't want to be alone but would rather be that #than have dina think about her like she thinks about joel #anyway you find comfort in surprising things #ellie wanted to believe someone was there for joel in the end #joel is happy with his daughter i rambled in the notes #im going to cry myself to sleep they deserved better

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starlessskies94 · 4 years

Text

Consequence (Joel Miller x OC)

Summary: What if Joel survived his injuries from the Abby and Fireflies attack but ends up with really bad amnesia. He can’t remember his wife, Ellie, or the Outbreak; only before. How will his family bring back the man they once knew?

Pairing: Joel Miller x OC

Note: Sorry I'm a little late posting an update. After so much sadness, why don't we take a break? We need some cute happy moments...my babies are too sad. :( Here's a flashback that is well needed right now. I hope you enjoy it <3

Chapter Six

The sun had long since set, the night unusually calm and still after a morning spent travelling and walking through the Wyoming Museum that Joel had surprised the girls with for Ellie’s birthday.

It had been fun and Ada had enjoyed every second of it. That was until they’d been separated and Ellie had seen the dead Firefly and his messages of hate and anger towards the group after they’d been forced to disband.

Ada had always wondered what would become of them after Marlene’s death, she supposed now she had her answer.

They’d set up their tents for the night with a roaring campfire burning away in between them as the horses grazed contently not too far away. The older woman sat a small distance from the campsite by the water’s edge of the deep pool flooded into the forest beds. Brown eyes stare into the lazy river flowing through the fallen rocks and dead trees, filtering through the cracks into a string of waterfalls that beautifully reflected in the soft moonlight above.

She watches the water move, her mind completely quiet and undisturbed. It’s strange even now to still have quiet moments like this. She’s so used to running for her life, constantly vigilant for the sounds of nearby infected or potential threats that sometimes find their way through. But now she can relax, she can breathe and it’s glorious. There’s just that tiny nag in the corner of her mind. It tugs gently until she can no longer ignore it. She glances back to the tents, towards the young girl that is currently occupying her mind. Ellie sits quietly by the entrance of her tent, headphones in her ears, comic book on her lap as she idly flips through the pages. While Joel tends to the fire, poking and prodding here and there to keep it burning long enough for their supper to be cooked. She’d made sure to pack enough for the whole journey but Ellie had chosen to catch a few fish for tonight’s meal, what with it being her birthday and all. And as the teen was quick to remind both her and Joel…repeatedly...

My birthday, my rules.

It was the first time she’d seen it in Ellie’s eyes but it had definitely been there and it terrified her. That doubt. For so long Ellie had taken Joel and Ada’s words as fact, she had never brought up the Fireflies or what had happened in the hospital after they’d left so quickly. After all, what reason would they have to lie?

Ada felt her chest tighten at the thought. What would she say if the girl started asking questions? What would Joel say? For the first time in over a year, she was starting to feel guilty for hiding the truth of what really happened. Maybe Ellie deserved to know, maybe they never should have lied in the first place.

But as she glanced back across at her daughter, the fear went away. She was a mother and it was her duty to protect her child. No matter how old she was. And while she may not have been Ellie’s biological mom, she was every bit a mother to the girl whether they were related by blood or not. She'd raised Ellie from being a few days old after her mother had passed. And she had done the best she could with what she had.

She’s was so lost in her own barrelling train of thoughts, that she doesn’t hear Joel approaching until he sat beside her.

“Hey you doing alright over here?” He asks.

“Yeah I’m fine.” She lies and Joel instantly knows that something is wrong, the concern evident on his face as he leans closer towards her.

“No you’re not. You're worrying.” He says gently. “It's Ellie ain’t it? You saw it too.”

She doesn’t even have to question what he’s talking about. They both saw the look on Ellie’s face when they forced their way into the abandoned building and found the girl stood alone in the dark, her light illuminating the Firefly sign and the dark letters painted below.

‘Liars’

In a way it felt as if the very message was speaking directly to them. For what else could they call themselves for the stories they had spun, for the protection of a girl that they both wanted to save? That they both loved.

Ada said nothing as she moved to rest her head on Joel’s shoulder, the man sighing deeply, lifting his arm to wrap around her waist, his own head then rested upon hers. They held each other close as they’d done so many times before, staring out at the glistering water before them. The soft lapping of the water danced by the edge with the breeze of the night’s air, carrying with it the melody of chirping crickets in the long grass under foot.

“What are we gonna do?” The brunette whispers into the silence settled between them.

“With how things are going; I say we do nothing.”

“Nothing?”

“She ain’t asked about it, reckon there’s no reason to go pulling at strings until it’s time.” Joel reasoned. And he was right, Ellie was happy. She was making friends back in Jackson, learning new skills and discovering new talents. It wasn’t until Tommy had gifted her with a journal for her birthday that she actually discovered she was a pretty damn good artist. She had a bed to sleep in every night, a family to come home to, just like she’d always wanted. It was the closest thing Joel and Ada could remember from before; that somewhat resembled a normal life.

They had structure, a reason to get up in the morning. And it felt good. Eventually they moved from the water. Walking hand in hand towards the fire and sitting together, while Ellie continued quietly in her own little bubble, reading her comic book.

They glanced at one another and in that instant that their eyes met, it was decided they would keep their secret for a little longer. Ellie was happy and that was what mattered to them. Nothing more needed to be discussed.

Joel moved to tend to the burning fire, checking over the fish as it cooked above the flames. Though Ada had to quickly take over when the man sent her a lost look at the state of the food. The older man was talented at a lot of things throughout his twenty years of survival but it was obvious that cooking was not one of them. A trait that Ada found rather endearing about him. To meet this confident, strong and stoic man; only to then find out that he struggled to cook a simple can of soup without somehow managing to burn it to the bottom of the pan.

Although it was considered rather old-fashioned, Ada still enjoyed looking after Joel. After everything he had done for her and Ellie, something as simple as cooking him a decent meal made her feel like she was giving something back. She’d tried teaching him in the early days they’d arrived in Jackson but it seemed it was a skill Joel just couldn’t pick up, no matter how often she attempted it. It was a small thing but it made her feel better knowing that; even if she couldn’t control anything regarding Joel’s safety when he left on patrols, at least he wasn’t going out with an empty stomach.

With the food done Ada quickly served the meal, splitting the fresh fish between herself, Joel and Ellie. Who, as a typical teenager, said nothing as she took the plate from her mother and disappeared back into her tent, comic book under her arm and headphones still blasting in her ears. The older woman merely smiled, taking her seat back at Joel’s side as the two ate in a comfortable silence.

When they’d finished Joel had offered to wash up, a credit to his Texas manners as he moved towards the stream to fetch water. He heated it through after grabbing a rag from his backpack and once again found his place at Ada’s side.

She watched him as he worked, a smile tugging at her lips. It had been almost two years since she’d met this man and she still wasn’t quite sure what she’d done to deserve him.

If she was honest she had never loved anyone the way she loved Joel. It was almost laughable how irritating they once found each other when they'd first met. Constantly arguing over plans, ideas and routes to take to get to their destination. She’d wanted so badly to get rid of this gloomy grump, confident in her own abilities that she could find her way with Ellie on her own. And yet now she couldn’t even fathom the idea of living without him.

“Hey.” She called gently, grabbing Joel’s attention as he glanced her way. “ I wanted to thank you, for all this. Everything you’ve done for Ellie. I think this is without a doubt the best birthday she’s ever had. Back in Boston I could never really do a lot for her. Couldn’t even get her a decent present with those damn ration cards.”

“You don’t gonna thank me Ada, reckon this was good for all of us.” He said, wringing out the rag as he finished the washing up, then hanging it dry. Ada shuffled on her behind, grabbing her legs to cross them underneath her and leaned back on her arms to gaze up at him.

“Yes I do, you didn’t have to do this. And that tape you found her...I mean she loves it Joel.” He smiled at her words, his eyes moving to find Ellie still sat alone with her Walkman.

“You do realise she’ll be listening to that on repeat for months right?” She laughed with him. His face lit up with joy, it was the same feeling he’d felt when he gave her the gift in the first place. The pure wonder and glee when she played it. He looked back to Ada and his heart leaped in his chest when he saw the love in her eyes.

“Well...you know, speaking of presents, I do actually have something else.” He teased with a mischievous grin widening across his face. He kneeled down beside the woman, rummaging through his bag then pulled out a small vinyl cover. Ada’s mouth agape in surprise as she took the album from Joel, a small gasp leaving her, her smile hid behind the hand that rested on her chin.

“Joel...I...how did you…” She uttered, completely at a loss for words. It was a Fleetwood Mac album, one of her favourites in fact. The man beside her lowered himself back down, his hazel eyes level with hers.

“You said they were your favourite growing up, cause of your mom and I found a music store before we left Jackson so I figured...you know…” He explained and Ada was touched by how considerate he was. How sweet. She’d told him the story of her mother listening to the band throughout her childhood and teen years, when they’d first started to soften to one another while travelling through Pittsburgh. But that had been months ago and yet he had remembered every detail. A fact that Ada was quick to point out to him, but he just smiled and shrugged.

“I guess I do listen more than you think.” He simply said. And damn if Ada didn’t fall in love with this man all over again.

“I love it, thank you.”

“You’re welcome darlin’.”

She still hadn’t said the actual words to him yet. Which, when she thought about it seemed so ridiculous. She put the album to the side, unfold her legs and tackled the man in a hug. A reaction Joel clearly hadn’t been expecting as the force of it left them both in a tangled mess on the forest floor. Ada landing on top of him, as he let out a muffled grunt as he met the ground with his back. His arms wrapping around her middle and holding her in place, while hers found themselves round his neck, her fingers brushing through his hair.

“I love you.” She said breathlessly, her eyes never leaving his. She saw his throat quiver as he swallowed hard, his face softened as his calloused fingers caressed against her face. A gentle touch but one that still made her feel warm and giddy. He brushed her hair from her eyes, sweeping the brown locks behind her ear and smiled lovingly.

“I love you too.” He replied. The words said for the first time between them. He moved forward to kiss her, eyes sliding close, noses touching as they leaned closer.

“Oh come on guys!! Seriously?! Fucking gross!” Ellie bellowed, instantly killing the mood as Joel groaned letting his head fall back against the floor, his arms releasing Ada as she quickly scuffled from him and back to her feet. Hand reaching out to help Joel up.

Both adults stepped away from the other, attempting to put the distance between them as Ellie stared them down with a raised eyebrow.

“And on my fucking birthday, what are you trying to scar me for life or something?” She joked. But Ada and Joel were far too embarrassed to see the funny side. The girl continued with a deep chuckle, her tongue sticking out as she gagged and pulled faces at the whole thing.

“Oh man that image is gonna be stuck in my brain forever!” She groaned. “Get out! Get out” She whined tapping her head with her small fist as she squeezed her eyes closed. Turning on her heel and retreating back towards her tent.

Joel awkwardly cleared his throat when the girl had gone, looking anywhere and everywhere except towards Ada. The woman doing the same, her stomach fluttering and cheeks hot from endless blushing.

“Well that was uhhh...unexpected.” The man mumbled. Ada just laughed as she felt the tension melt away between them as Ellie shouted at the two to go to bed and jokingly threatened to ground them if they didn’t behave. Joel just shook his head at the girl and smiled at his love as they called it a night and headed towards their tent. Ellie watched them go and readied herself for first watch, taking the risk to glance through the tent door and seeing Joel and Ada had already fallen asleep. She'd never tell them but it was actually kinda cute when they cuddled up to each other. She was glad they were happy. It was nice.

Yeah Ellie thought to herself as she settled in for the night.

Best. Birthday. Ever.

#Joel Miller #joel the last of us #joel and ellie #joel miller x oc #the last of us part 2 #the last of us #Ellie Williams #fanfiction #starlesskies writes

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unicyclehippo · 5 years

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Modern Bodyguard AU!

joel isn’t impressed. joel isnt easily impressed, that much is true, but ellie can tell. not from his body language—he always stands like someone is a threat, even if that someone is five foot nothing and looks thinner than a rake under their jacket—but from his voice, which is flat, words clipped short, sentences shorter.

‘i assure you, dina is the best there is.’

ellie rolls her eyes. that voice she recognises very well—oliver tully, an unfortunately common face around the bodyguard business. he knows everyone and everyone knows him. and despite the fact that he’s a known leak when it comes to tour dates, lunchtime appointments, bars a musician might frequent, he’s also really good at his job.

‘tully, tell me why i oughta trust you again? last time we were here, you got us chased down main by a mob of rabid fans.’

‘rabid,’ tully laughs. ‘that’s a bit extreme—‘

‘one girl was literally foaming at the mouth. if that ain’t rabid, i don’t know what is.’

‘enthusiastic.’

‘uh huh.’

ellie grins, shakes her head. no, joel is not impressed, not one bit.

‘as it is, joel—‘

‘miller.’

‘miller,’ tully corrects himself, and makes every effort to ensure the hurt in his tone is clear to joel. ‘this isn’t about me or anything that i might have said in passing to abigail peterson, this is about the safety of our girl. ah,’ tully squeaks, clears his throat. ellie can see past the blockade joel is making of his body that tully’s hands are shaking as he smooths down the front of his colourful jacket. ‘your girl, of course. and you’re in luck! i have the pleasure of introducing you to dina hayes.’

joel grunts.

‘she’s trained in several martial arts, is familiar with counter-surveillance, is very good at crowd control,’

‘can she talk for herself?’

‘i can,’ an unfamiliar voice agrees.

ellie sits bolt upright from her couch, boot heel thumping against the coffee table. from the silence outside, it’s clear that they all heard her, but mercifully joel continues interrogating this dina person without calling her out on it.

after the initial literal jolt of interest, ellie forces herself to relax. she can’t lay down but she sits at the edge of the couch and closes her eyes, strains her ears to listen to this voice. beautiful voice. there’s a rasp to it that hits on some words but not others, and ellie is eager to get her to talk more freely and for longer so that she can know what words they are, and why, and to get a feel for the lilt and linger of her cadence and pronunciations, because as it is, her short replies aren’t enough for ellie to—to what? they just aren’t enough.

‘i’ll talk with ellie about it,’ joel finally says. ‘and i’d like to give you a test, if you’re up for it.’

‘always.’

‘alright.’ joel scratches at his jaw. ‘alright. wait here.’

he retreats up the stairs into the room where ellie is waiting, closing the door behind him. for a moment he just looks at her, brows raised, and then he says,

‘y’know, it’s not ethical to hire someone just cause you think they’re pretty.’

ellie scowls at him. grabs for her guitar. ‘that’s not—i didn’t even see her.’

he shrugs. ‘seems to know her stuff. i can take her out, see how she does. get maria to draw up an NDA and a contract—three months maybe, probation.’

‘right.’ ellie’s shoulders hunch as she leans over the guitar, remembering why exactly they’re hiring for a new bodyguard. it had been a hard transition—ellie isn’t ever the most fond of change and so getting rid of david had been...hard.

‘you alright?’ ellie grunts. ‘can you use your words? i don’t want to leave you here if you’re not okay,’ he adds. to someone else, the words might sound none too gentle, but ellie can hear it. the faint adjustment as he forces himself to be quieter, and calmer.

ellie plucks a discordant note on the guitar. ‘i’m okay to leave. just thinking about. david.’ she doesn’t have to look up to feel joel’s glare. ‘sorry.’

‘not your fault, kid. but don’t you waste one second of time thinkin’ about him—he’s not worth it.’

‘i know.’

‘good. i’m going to spar with this hayes lady, see if she’s any good, and,’ joel pauses. when ellie glances up, she finds him watching her. specifically, her hands as they pluck across the strings of her guitar in an unfamiliar tune. ‘see you in an hour.’

it’s been one hour and fourteen minutes and ellie is sitting on a stool placed halfway between the door and the coffee table. her coffee is cooling there and making faint rings around ellie’s own face, staring up at her out of a folded over magazine and a cheery yellow post-it note that reads, in strict block letters, THINK ABOUT IT.

she hasn’t been thinking about it—an offer made in the magazine by another artist, apparently, who is interested in working with ELL, the rising country star. she’s been thinking about how it’s been one hour and - fifteen minutes now and joel isn’t back. she’s not worried; she can hear him outside. it’s just odd that he’s late, which he almost never is, and also it’s extremely odd that he’s, well, if she didn’t know any better she might think that joel is being friendly.

joel.

there’s a knock at the door and ellie can’t decide whether to sit or stand so she’s an awkward way between the two, pushing herself up off the stool, when she calls for them to come in.

‘ellie,’ joel greets her with a big grin. ‘sorry i’m late.’

‘it’s fine.’

he doesn’t buy it but he looks her over and decides to agree, obviously, when he nods. ellie feels her heart rate settle—if joel thinks she’s okay, then she probably is, after all—and she sits and directs her attention to the second pair of boots standing in her doorway. up to comfortable black jeans. up to a plain shirt and a shining jacket ellie will have to talk to her about. up to long brown hair and up to a nice smile and and then, finally, up to a pair of warm brown eyes.

‘hey. dina hayes.’

‘hey. ellie knight.’

dina hayes’s eyes crinkle at the corners, and it makes ellie blink and look away because she’s been making way too much eye contact. she focuses on joel, who has moved a few paces back to lean against the wall. he raises his brows, shrugs.

‘hello, ellie knight,’ dina hayes says, and though the words and tone are faintly teasing, ellie doesn’t think she minds. ‘i’m going to be your bodyguard for the next three months. provided i don’t steal from you or let you get arrested or smoke on duty.’

it takes a moment for ellie to form a reply, because this is the most she has heard dina hayes speak and her voice is wonderful. warm in tone and pitch, rasping now and again. orange, ellie thinks. orange like a tabby cat in the sun, orange like campfire, orange like bleached red dust and dust motes in a red room. the images come instantly, flooding her, and she picks some out and discards others as incorrect, but all of them are good. not quite right, but all good.

‘second hand smoke isn’t good for anyone but i need my lungs,’ ellie tells her, shrugs.

‘ah, that makes sense. i thought miller meant weed but second hand smoke, that makes sense.’

‘no drugs,’ joel barks from his place against the wall.

dina hayes grins, winks at ellie. ‘only riling you up, miller. this is a drug free temple,’ she tells him, gesturing to her body.

‘it makes me anxious anyway,’ ellie tells her, because she knows this game. she widens her eyes to look innocent. ‘not that i’ve ever smoked weed, joel.’

he mutters something about hating them both, and girls, honestly, and he’s going to have a heart attack before retirement so the payout had better be good, and lets himself out. he doesn’t close the door, and ellie suspects that he hasn’t gone far.

‘so, you’re okay with me hanging around?’ dina hayes asks.

‘yeah. if joel says you’re good, i trust him.’ dina nods at that, clearly making a mental note. ellie pauses. ‘your jacket.’

‘hmm? cool, right?’ dina hayes swivels to show it off and the sleeves brush against the body of it, the sound swishing and shushing and—dina hayes is grinning so ellie just nods.

‘it looks good.’ technically correct, since that’s not the issue ellie has with it.

‘thanks!’

ellie stands, eyes flicking to her guitar to make sure the movement hasn’t jostled it. she hasn’t been touching it but it’s instinctual now. she crosses the room, hand outstretched, and meets dina hayes’s eyes for a second time.

‘dina hayes, welcome to my team. i hope you enjoy it.’

the hand that takes hers is small and shakes firmly, calloused palms and even a few scars. warm.

‘i believe that i will, ellie knight.’

#prompt fill #ellie x dina #video gays #tlou

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foodieworldmelbourne · 6 years

Text

'We've had a bit of fun, haven't we?': Why I'll never forget Samuel Symons

Updated October 08, 2018 10:21:53 Related Story: 'Kind, witty and smart': Samuel Symons dies from brain tumour Map: Melbourne 3000 When I first met Samuel Symons, he was at the back of a bus full of Year 8 boys and their mothers on a whistlestop tour of China. It was 2005 when fake high-end brands were easy to buy. Samuel's classmates fidgeted as Gucci bags and questionable cashmere pashminas passed between us mothers. But Samuel sat contently, muttering fragments of the British television sitcom Black Books. Huge blue eyes and a smile that wrapped around his face. I knew then he was someone special. Each time we got to a new hotel, Samuel's mother, Elly, grabbed a small cold pack and got off the bus fast. She had a stash of drugs that needed refrigeration. Samuel had a thick keloid scar across his throat, the calling card of recent surgery for thyroid cancer, and was on medication. None of this bothered the teenager who was first diagnosed with cancer when he was four a brain tumour called glioma. Doctors thought that if he survived, the intense radiation of his young brain would make it unlikely he would ever finish high school.

Photo: Red and Elly Symons with their sons Samuel, Raphael and Joel when the children were young. (Supplied: Symons family) Samuel spent most of his childhood in and out of hospital. He had several hundred scans and a dozen operations for brain and thyroid cancer. "I think after being so close to death that I could give it a little peck on the cheek, even then I don't tend to think about it," Samuel later told me. "I was too busy trying to stay alive and keep living, that I really just didn't care about death, and never have and never will." Guest speaker in 2007 at a fundraiser for Brainwave that helps children with neurological disorders, Samuel had the crowd in stitches. "You can't change what's happening inside you with cancer," he said. "So what you need to do is try to fix everything around you, like for instance, make sure you have a good bed, good food, all the right drugs you know, morphine, top of the range." I learnt pretty quickly that dry humour was how it rolled in the Symons family. Samuel's father Red Symons was the early morning presenter of ABC Radio Melbourne, well known for his stint in the band Skyhooks and the comedy show Hey, Hey It's Saturday. When I asked the family if they would consider Samuel telling his story in an episode of Australian Story, Red was reluctant. Samuel's illness had always been off limits for media. "I did feel that he might well be misrepresented and treated in a rather tabloid way," Red said. "If you're going to tell this story, it should be told properly. No good could come of him being poor little celebrity, weepy boy."

Photo: Elly Symons (right) says her family will be carrying on Samuel's mantra of living life with kindness for others. (Supplied: James Pendlidis) But Elly was proud of the way her son just got on with the business of living in his unassuming and gentle way. Samuel hoped his story might help other young people with cancer. "I used to think what would it have been like if I hadn't had any of these surgeries or any of the cancer or anything," he said. "But then what's the point of thinking about the past when you can just think about now? "Cancer itself has given me the determination to do things in life and understand other people." So, we agreed I would follow the family for two years until Samuel was 18. Only then would the story go to air. 'War on abnormal': Samuel's final weeks

Photo: Elly Symons with her son Samuel on his graduation day from the University of Melbourne. (Supplied: Elly Symons) Samuel seemed like a "Teflon man", defying one prognosis after another, including the level of education he attained: in quick succession, Year 12, an arts degree at the University of Melbourne, majoring in psychology, and then a master's degree in management. His paid job was in human resources. But it was the volunteer work at the Salvation Army, the Greek Cultural Centre (his mother comes from a Greek and Cypriot family) and with young patients being treated for cancer that really filled him with pride. Early this year Samuel took me through the new youth centre at the Peter MacCallum Cancer Centre like he owned it. And I guess he kind of did. He had spent two years on an advisory board set up to provide a nice space within the hospital where younger patients could hang out with friends and family. "I saw what wasn't there when I was that age and didn't want anyone else feeling like this was a cold, confusing place," he said. "Who needs that!"

Photo: Samuel dedicated his time to volunteering at a number of organisations, including the Salvation Army. (Australian Story: Belinda Hawkins) Just as he was turning 27 in May this year, the Victorian Government gave him an award in recognition of his work. But by then, Samuel had been diagnosed with a new brain tumour, this time a glioblastoma multiforme. "At that point, every measure that could be taken was taken," Elly said. "Unfortunately, there hasn't been a significant change in the treatment of brain cancer in decades, and this is something that we really need to put a lot more money into research." When Elly suggested the family go on a holiday, Samuel said no, he'd rather go to work and feel normal. And for a while that's exactly what he did. His younger brothers, Raphael, 25, and Joel, 20, became his "lieutenants" in the war against abnormal. It was all about football, games and ticking off the youngest. They're made of the same stuff as him.

Photo: Samuel Symons (centre) had a close bond with his younger brothers Raphael and Joel. (Supplied: James Pendidis) Ten days ago, I saw them by his bedside at the Peter MacCallum Centre, squeezing his hand, worrying about whether he was too hot or too cold, sitting quietly as he slept, just watching him breathe, devoted. "He was the most resilient person I know," Joel said. "He flirted with death so many times that it became second nature to him. It stopped scaring him and started humouring him. He took that humour and gave it to everyone he knew." Last week Samuel died. "He wanted everyone to be kind to each other," Elly said. "And I think that is really something that we should all be striving for, and that's what we will be doing as his family in his honour." His father Red asked for privacy as he grieved the loss of his "beautiful son". I thought about the many times that Samuel and I caught up for a chat since that bus trip 13 years ago. Each time he'd farewell me with, "Well, Belinda, we've had a bit of fun, haven't we?" Yes, Samuel, we all did. And thank you. Watch the rescreening of The Story of Samuel on Australian Story at 8pm on ABCTV and ABC iview. Topics:brain-tumor,cancer,human-interest,melbourne-3000 First posted October 08, 2018 06:09:16 http://www.abc.net.au/news/2018-10-08/samuel-symons-quietly-inspirational-life-brain-tumour-cancer/10339094

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