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#that’s so funny but accurate
such-a-daydreamer · 3 months
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And then they explode
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marblescorner · 8 months
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Biblically accurate radioapple interaction
(original meme below)
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artkaninchenbau · 3 months
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People keep on asking for more Baby Robin and Papadile so here is more Baby Robin and Papadile. Now never ask anything from me ever again
#My art#One Piece#Long post#Sir Crocodile#Nico Robin#Alternatively panel 5 would've been a close up of Crocodile's face from Robin's POV where he looks like he's giving her a death glare#Not intentionally he's just a big scary bastard with a Resting Murder Face and Robin is a small traumatized child#But I wanted to focus on the silliness of the moment so you get the goofy version instead#IDK man there's just something very funny to me about the idea of Robin just randomly info-dumping about a subject she's read about#And Crocodile being like ''?????????????????????? The fuck you talking about??''#Robin leaves the ship's kitchen and Crocodile just stares at the tomato like ''...It's a fruit? Forreal?''#(Meanwhile Robin is sweating bullets like ''I called his favorite vegetable a FRUIT right in his FACE he's going to KILL ME'')#Robin grew extra feet from the bottom of her feet to reach the counter and that actually isn't me trying to explain bad art away#In the original Papadile comic there was a panel of Robin doing the dishes with extra feet to reach the sink but I cut it out#(It was a stress relief comic I did not feel like drawing a complicated background in detail) (BUT YES I THOUGHT OF IT)#Nico Robin Age 11 is *more* than capable of cooking Crocodile just does not trust her with his food. At least not yet#She did start doing the dishes unprompted and continues to do so (mostly out of fear). Croc told her she didn't have to but allows it#IDK a lot of people seem to headcanon Crocodile as incapable of cooking and like. Surely Mr ''I don't trust people'' knows how to cook#Like he doesn't have to be a master chef or anything but and maybe he enjoys not HAVING to cook (pain in the ass with one hand + knife/hook#But surely he can cook decent enough. SURELY#Botanists don't @ me I know the ''tomato is a fruit'' thing isn't fully accurate this is just a silly little haha comic
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pixlatedvampire · 1 month
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Local Dark Priest Experiences Untold Horrors and Affronts to God, Says He "Feels Nothing"
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acid-ixx · 3 months
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"hostage situation"
series masterlist
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nightwing, to his siblings: okay, so we have to be real careful because the joker and harley quinn are holding our baby sibling hostage and we can't put them in anymore danger.
nightwing, looks at red robin: i'm sure they have some traps laid around the lair so you'll be disarming it.
red robin, nods:
robin: then me and todd will be handling any spare targets, no?
nightwing: of course. cass, steph and duke will be guarding the entrance. babs?
oracle, speaking in the intercoms: this is the closest point of entry where (name) is being kept hostage.
red robin: security cams suggest there's more than just harley and the joker in the lair. a bunch of their goons are heavily guarding both the entrance and the exit. we should thread carefully.
oracle: there's no camera's where (name) is exactly at, but there's a specific room where it's shown that the two are often visiting.
batman, who had been lurking behind them: this is a priority mission. we can't afford to make mistakes.
robin, eyebrows raised: though, is it necessary to bring the entire family? me and my father could handle this entirely by ourselves.
jason, sighs: don't pretend like you weren't the first to suggest the entire justice league to come searching for them, kid.
batman: enough arguing, (name) needs all the support they could get after this. so on my count, we are to bust open the door.
dick: alright, everybody, prepare.
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*meanwhile, inside the lair, in a makeshift "house"*
(name), sitting on a comfy chair whilst holding a cup of hot chocolate and a book in the other, sneezes: oh— did anyone mention my name?
harley quinn, already on her way to wipe their nose: oh my baby! is our baby sick?!
(name): no, i just suddenly sneezed?
the joker, in another room: i spy with my little eye, a child way past their bedtime~ c'mon babyboo, let's get you to bed!
(name): awe, but it's like, 10pm. i wanna read some more.
harley, about to pick (name) up: then let momma read the book for you in bed, cutesy pie—
*the door to the kitchen slams open*
dick, with his escrima sticks on-hand: surrender (name) to us now or—!
dick, absolutely befuddled: wait, what?!
damian, with bruce in tow: what's the hold up, nightwing?!
damian, about to jump right in front of dick before he was stopped by bruce's hand on his shoulder: what is... this?
bruce: ... explain the meaning of this, harley.
harley, holds (name) closer to her chest as she's equally confused: what do ya mean, bats? ain't it obvious i'm taking care of my child?
(name): uhm...
damian, visibly offended: what do you mean, your child? (name) over there is ours.
the joker, walks over to the room in a hurry: what's with all the commotion over here?! (name) is supposed to be in bed, harle— batman?!
bruce, with squinted eyes: don't act stupid, what is this all about?
nightwing, surveying the room: wait, why is (name) in pajamas?
(name), trying their best to shrug in harley's tight hug: i'm... supposed to go to bed...?
the joker, about to walk over to (name) before he's stopped by a batarang almost hitting the side of his head: hey! what's that for? i'm clearly not trying to attack my own child!
bruce: (name) is my child, not yours.
the joker, glaring at batman: well, it's not my fault they choose me over you!
(name) wayne, interrupting the two: uhm... i did technically disown myself from the family so—
damian: disown yourself?
(name): i have every reason to—
dick: look, baby bird, you don't know what's right for you, these guys are dangerous—
(name): i literally got nearly killed by some nobody criminals if not for harley saving me but okay, nightwing.
bruce, whose attention is now on (name): you almost got what now?
(name), rolling their eyes: i almost died, batman. now if you excuse me, i think i deserve a good night sleep tonight.
(name), looks at harley who still hasn't released them from the protective hug: can we?
harley quinn, facepalming in her mind as she stares back at (name): oh, i should've bought you to pam and selina instead.
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seventh-district · 5 months
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Making Incorrect H:SR Quotes Until I Run Out of (hopefully) Original Ideas - Pt. 1 - Ratiorine Messages Edition
[Pt. 2] [Pt. 3] [Pt. 4] [Pt. 5] [Pt. 6]
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inkskinned · 1 year
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he says i hate everyone except you and that is addictive and that is kind of romantic and beautiful because you're young and you're kind of a sarcastic asshole too and you don't like bad boys, per say, but you don't really like good ones either. and you like that you were the exception, it felt like winning.
except life is not a romance book, and he was kind of being honest. he doesn't learn to be nice to your friends. he only tolerates your family. you have to beg him to come with you to birthday parties, he complains the whole time. you want to go on a date but - people are often there, wherever you're going. he's just so angry. about everything, is the thing. in the romance book, doesn't he eventually soften? can't you teach him, through your own sense of whimsy and comfort?
at first - you know introverts often need smaller friend groups, and honestly, you're fine staying at home too. you like the small, tidy life you occupy. you're not going to punish him for his personality type.
except: he really does hate everyone but you. which means he doesn't get along with his therapist. which means he has no one to talk to except for you. which means you take care of him constantly, since he otherwise has no one. which means you sometimes have to apologize for him. which means he keeps you home from seeing your friends because he hates them. you're the single exception.
about a decade from this experience, you'll type into google: how to know if a relationship is codependent.
he wraps an arm around you. i hate everyone except you. these days, you're learning what he's actually confessing is i have very little practice being kind.
#i used to think it was romantic too and then i was like. now i see it as a HUGE red flag#writeblr#it is also almost EXCLUSIVELY said by immature ppl who think this is normal#fyi even if u think it's funny and ur like 'im an introvert it's just TRUE' like. you need therapy (ily tho)#healed introversion is just ''i would prefer to be by myself'' not ''i hate every person'' ... hate is not normal. that is not healthy#im sorry. i know it feels accurate. but if you're walking around with that kind of rage....#1. you're making a LOT of assumptions about every single person u have ever met. which is often unfair and unkind#and also usually involves judging people based on their worst moments or little mistakes#2. you are being unfair to the person who is ur ''exception''#3. there is a VAST difference between ''ur my favorite person'' and ''the ONLY person i like.''#idk i think this is just a personal bias thing tbh#im sure there are people who have this experience normally#but i have YET to find a man who thinks like this and ISNT absolute DOGSHIT. although tbh.... like. im sure he exists#when u hit like 30 some of the things that were once kind of hot now just sound fucking exhausting. like ''im in a band''#edit in the tags: i used to kind of be like this too. but the thing is that like. my life became so much more peaceful#once i started believing that people are generally good. like yes i am mad at the world at large#but it's just.... a very hard way to live. you're not a bad person or wrong for the ways other people hurt you and taught you to be angry.#but that anger will continue to hurt YOU. it will punish YOU. it will prevent YOU from making new deep connections. it will protect you yes#but it will also cause MASSIVE blowback. bc if you lose the One Person... your life will fall apart. i know this personally.#i really recommend just trying to be... cautiously optimistic instead. like. yes#people can be horrible and cruel and there are some communities (incels for example) that aren't worth that optimism#but i think like... most people will hold a door for you . most people want to help you find your wallet .#i hope one day you are able to find peace. i hope that rage eventually smooths over. i know how hard it is PERSONALLY#and i know what must have happened to you. and im deeply deeply sorry we share the same wound.#but i promise - sometimes we all need someone else to help us carry the weight. eventually the rage has to die so that we can let help in#i had to spend years biting at outstretched hands. i still often do. im still very wary . and my heart breaks that you flinch too.#here's the thing: i don't blame you. but we were both acting out of fear and pain. .... not out of healthy behavior. and ... change#was needed. i needed change too. rage was useful for a while. then it just left me isolated and bitter. i had to (with effort)#choose to let that rage go. and let people in . VERY SLOWLY THO LOL
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aphel1on · 5 months
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AURGH auwarghh the autistic parental trauma... the epi was wacky hijinks then dropped this on us out of nowhere... (sobs) laios... laiiiiooooos
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sparring-spirals · 15 days
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someone more well caught up with the campaign can correct me if im wrong. But based on the impression I've gotten, i love the like. Spectrum of "accidentally oncall" we have, with how the Mighty Nein are accidentally unknown go-to's for various powerful people to get tasks done, while Bell's Hells are accidentally primary sources and lynchpins for various powers to understand and coordinate events.
Like the Mighty Nein are. they're assholes, if you talk to them and they dont really like you. you'll know it and it will kind of suck. But for the most part people don't have to interact directly with them. It's almost weird how much they don't have to??? Like shit just gets. Done. And you find out later like OH its the same. weirdos. No idea who they are but you're told its the same group. What do they even look like. There are so many weird stories at least half of them NEED to be fake. Or people just assume incorrect attribution bc it cant ALL be the same group. What do you mean they saved a world and an island and? Turtles were involved? Sea serpents? what.
For anyone who knows even slightly better/has slightly better connections (but doesn't know them personally) They're just like a weird form of an urban legend where its like. elite strike team. silent and effective. (in the background we see them falling out of the sky into the ocean onto one another). But for the most part its really peak. Knows a guy who knows a guy. If someone HAPPENS to be present they might be squinting into the chaos like. That girl choked me with a stick once? Isnt that other one a professor. Wha- okay. They're gone again. Silent. effective. You have a really hard time tracking them down even if you want to. (If they want to find you though, you can't escape them).
And then with Bell's Hells. (At least when I last checked in). It goes more like. Hey some weirdos have critical knowledge for us. And it's just. an Absolute Halloween themed clown car of events that rolls up. There's a talking dead rat. Weird old gnome griping about wood. They keep flirting with everyone. Including someone that looks very evil. A busty faun just took your wallet. You're pretty sure this group threw a bunch of bees in someone's face in a street race and crashed a skyship and were absolute NIGHTMARE CUSTOMERS at various establishments. They're the ones with critical knowledge. They are communicating it SO, INCREDIBLY INEFFECTIVELY. They were on the moon? They have a person FROM the moon? They keep trying to be friendly with you. You don't want them to be. Another critical thing happens. They're the only one with knowledge. Again. The dead rat keeps flirting with you. You're getting voices in your head. More developments in the critical scenario. They're still the primary source on this potentially Exandria-shattering event. They're still spending an inexplicable amount of time talking about the hotness of various people inbetween dispensing information that literally no one else has been able to glean. You know who they are. You kind of wish you didn't. You are Going To See Them Again. (threat)
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xiewho · 6 months
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every time a fantasy high character makes a horrifying body modification a fanartist's art program crashes mid-drawing somewhere. what do you mean his maximum legend tattoo is in roboto
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claudiajessies · 6 months
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ERIN QUINN & CLARE DEVLIN IN DERRY GIRLS | S01E01 “EPISODE 2”
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potatobugz · 12 days
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objects loving objects baby!!!!
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fernsproutxx · 10 months
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i love @dovewingkinnie’s expressions bruv i coULDN’T HELP MYSELF…
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most of them come from the music video of “terrible things” hahahah
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This is from like a month or so ago, but have more biblically accurate Hiccstrid 🫶
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laurrelise · 1 month
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okay all i want right now is an umbrella academy spinoff of just the deli fives working in the kitchen like in the bear
ok ok picture this:
deli owner five: i swear to fucking god five, if five has to wait any longer for the brisket, you’re fired.
brisket five: it’s not my fault! five still hasn’t finished the goddamn fries! (clearly at his breaking point)
fryer five: that’s because someone left his station dirty when he left after his morning shift. (also at his breaking point)
clocked-out fryer five: (sprinting out the back door) alright see you assholes tomorrow
server five: alright, i try not to get on you guys about ticket times… but five looks like he’s about ready to walk out.
deli owner five: fuck, give him a free dessert.
server five: okay, but can we hurry this shit up? i’d like a tip if that’s alright with you dickheads.
brisket five: get the hell out of my kitchen.
busser five: (bursting in with a full bin of dirty dishes) drunk five is demanding a fluffernutter and making a scene again.
deli owner five: (shuffling through countless tickets and slamming his fist on the counter) i have zero goddamn time for this five, we’re slammed with this lunch rush and im down two cooks today. help a guy out and get him to leave.
busser five: you pay me minimum wage and i could not give less of a shit. i’m not dealing with him again.
drunk five, bursting into the kitchen: i knew i smelled peanut butter in here (pointing at brisket five who’s currently on grill preparing a burger)
brisket five: this is literally a beef patty
deli owner five: alright man, we’ve tried to play nice, but you’re out of here. let’s go, don’t make a scene. (pulling drunk five out by his collar and dusting off his hands) fuckin’ hell, none of you make it easy, do you?
brisket five:
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booth five watching from the dining room: jesus christ
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anemicjellyfish · 2 months
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So Blitzø has an "Emergency Horse" in the Stolas Sex trunk. Which is likely used in the event one of them calls out a Safe Word
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Do you think their Safe Word is...
"Hold your horses"
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