what happens in the changelings route when daniil has to babysit clara (canon) (real) (my dad works at IPL)
transcript under cut. watch on youtube if you wish!
c: ah- wait how old are you
d: wait. guess.
c: thirty six. (wheezing)
d: WHAT??????
c: (wheezing) its a guess-
d: THAT WAS SO FAR OFF!!!!-uhh
c: now why are you yelling at me-
d: THAT WASNT EVEN CLOSE
c: huhHEE-HEE! (wheezing)
d: (thru tears) like normally when people play that game they're like "aww" they guess like a little bit younger. was that of the little bit younger guess???
c: yyyeeaah are you like thirty nine-
d: (shriek) WHAAT
c: (losing it)
[silence]
c: so was i right??
d: NO-hoo!!! [loud sound, interpreted as a gunshot in animation] i'm not in my thirties!
c: ohh. (high pitched) Really?
d: (soft) yeah i'm in my forties
c: ah i knew it (laughing, jokey voice) i was just being nice-
d: I'M NOT IN MY FORTIES WHAT DO YOU MEAN I KNEW IT. I'M TWENTY EIGHT. WHATTHEFUCKKKK
Your boyfriend? Yeah he caught the sand pest. No yeah he's eating lemon slices and buying drugs from the town children. I'm so so sorry, his utopian dreams got him here, no yeah the immortality ones.
ao3 being down has interrupted my nightly ritual of checking whether anyone has written a fic where the bachelor pathologic gets kicked down the stairs