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ranger-kellyn · 6 months

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Getaway Car WIP (3)

In celebration of hitting 25k for nanowrimo, have the section i'm the most pleased with so far <3

as always, it's nano, so no editing and this is just me throwing words on the page.

if it was it's own chapter, i would have titled it "in which they're supposed to be fucking but they wont STOP TALKING" (so plenty of kisses but no actual smut)

With a pop the fridge opened, light filtering into the space, leaving a yellow glow on the tile below. “Any ideas for lunch?” Cynthia asked, kneeling down to get a better look of what was inside. For someone who didn’t enjoy cooking all that much, Cynthia was amused by how much of an ‘ingredient household’ she was.

“I was thinking,” Diantha trailed off as she walked into the kitchen, running her fingers through her hair, working out any small tangles from undoing the braid. “Be honest with me: do I need to feed you now, or would you be interested in picking up where we left off?”

The formality of it almost made Cynthia laugh. She stood up, closing the fridge all in the same motion. The rainstorm that had rolled through left the whole apartment in low, moody lighting. A soft yellow glow from the lamps around the living and dining area.

“Took me a while to realize you were worked up– didn’t know it was that bad,” she teased, crossing the kitchen to her. “Hop up,” she added, getting Diantha to pull herself up onto the bartop’s counter, standing between her legs.

“Really?” Diantha asked, enough of a tilt of her chin to invite her to kiss, leaning into her mouth as she did so. “How long did it take you to notice?” So much for stressing over being obvious.

She shrugged, leaning away, hands either side of her hips. “Probably the last few takes. Whenever I realized you kept speaking in your Scarlet voice,” she said with a laugh.

Diantha laughed in turn, leaning back on her hands as a presentation of sorts, loving the lack of discomfort in the motion. Men and society in general had left her with a nagging voice in the back of her mind, worrying about the lack of curves on her own body. Women rarely ever made her feel that way – at least not to her face.

“I thought for sure you were onto me,” Diantha admitted.

Cynthia shook her head, letting her eyes wander over her body. She knew a presentation when she saw one, and wasn’t about to not appreciate her. Maroon was a nice color on her. “I just assumed that with how experienced of an actress you are, you weren’t feeling anything. I figured I was the only one getting worked up, and even then, I was still more focused on not focusing on the cameras,” she said, the both of them breathing a laugh.

Diantha leaned up, brushing Cynthia’s hair back into place, a soft kiss to her cheek.

“But then I started to realize, ‘I don’t think she’s really coming out of character between takes’. You were so strictly in Scarlet’s voice– which I then– I don’t know. I don’t know what it’s like talking with an accent all the time. My voice is already close enough to a generic Unovan accent, so I don’t know. Sounds exhausting.”

Diantha shrugged with one shoulder, wrapping her arms around her neck. “It was easier this time. More practice and all that,” she said.

She knew it wasn’t conducive to anything they were trying to do, but being who she was, Cynthia couldn't refrain from asking. “I know you said you had to spend time on a gun range for the role– did you have to do anything for the speaking part?”

Diantha laughed more audibly. “I did. Spent a few months with a vocal coach– Is this really what you want to talk about right now?” she asked, amused.

Cynthia shrugged. “Knowing how a person thinks, how they learn, learning how you approach things– is it weird that that’s kinda hot to me?” she asked.

Warm affection sat high in Diantha’s chest as she looked into her steely grey eyes. She was being genuine. There was nothing mocking or demeaning– if anything she seemed almost shy to admit such a thing.

The warmth and depth of the feeling– she shoved down the desire to say the love word.

“A very you thing to say,” Diantha instead said, emphasizing with a kiss against her soft lips. “You’re–” She laughed, pulling away to shake her head, not wanting to finish the thought.

“What?” Cynthia asked, amused as well.

She looked off to the side, hedging her bets on how what she wanted to say would go over. There had to be a way to deliver it that would at least elicit humor like she wanted, however, it also ran the risk of offense. “I was going to say,” she began, returning her attention. “I didn’t realize I was fucking such a nerd,” she said, both breaking out into a fit of laughter.

Cynthia pulled away, pointing at her. “You didn’t realize I was a nerd? I know for a fact that you’ve walked in on me and Steven geeking out over rocks!”

She threw her head back in a laugh, knowing exactly what she was referencing. One of the earlier international meetings she had attended as champion. If she remembered right, it was being held in Hoenn that year, and when she had finally joined the rest of the champions in the main conference room of the Lilycove hotel, Cynthia and Steven had been deep in a conversation about something she wasn’t entirely sure of. A bunch of terms and words that she later would learn were related to geology. Not close enough with either of them at that point, she had simply taken her seat, and kept to herself.

But that wasn’t how she knew Cynthia was a scholar. “That’s not what tipped me off, darling,” she said, reaching up to tap her nose. “I–” Her conscience had caught up to her at that point, reminding her that she was unsure how Cythia would react to what she wanted to say. “I don’t know if I should admit this,” she said.

“Admit what?” Cynthia asked, not a clue of where she was going with the thought.

Surly it wouldn't go over badly, she told herself. People engaging with their work and research was what researchers were going for, after all. Diantha wanted people to watch the shows and movies she was in– Surely Cynthia wanted people to read her own papers that she likely spent countless hours of her life on.

“The first meeting Kalos joined the league alliance,” she started, Cynthia giving her a quick nod. “I was having a lot of anxiety about that meeting the weeks leading up to it. Not only was I a new champion, but I was the first formal champion of the Kalos League. I had no clue how I would measure up to anyone, how I was supposed to present myself– I needed to at least ease my mind with a little research,” she said.

“And I’m the nerd?” Cynthia asked with a laugh, kissing her forehead.

Diantha quirked a brow, but said nothing otherwise to acknowledge it. “Knowing I would be spending a fair amount of time with all the champions, I put together a list of all the champions and their Elite Four so I could at least look everyone up and have some basic understanding of who was who.”

At that, Cynthia started to understand where she was going. Not too much would come up on an internet search of her name… “Oh no,” she said, humor in her tone.

“Don’t say ‘oh no’!” Diantha responded.

“You read one of my research papers, didn’t you?” She asked.

“What do you think was one of the top results when I searched your name?” she asked, a laugh in her voice.

She shook her head. For her, it was an obvious answer. “The Distortion World Papers,” she guessed, rising dread in her stomach.

Diantha nodded. “Exactly. If I’m being even more honest, that whole paper was one of the reasons I thought you would never want anything to do with me,” she admitted.

That gave Cynthia pause, not following her logic. “Really?” she asked, pulling away. The mood from earlier had shifted enough to call for some distance.

“Can you blame me?” Diantha asked, crossing her arms.

“I mean– I don’t know. Nobody willingly subjects themselves to my huge-ass papers,” she said, quickly tacking on, “Not unless they need help falling asleep.”

Diantha scoffed at the notion, reaching out to push her in a playful way. “You’re such a–” She shook her head, not having any real descriptor to follow up with. “That’s not the kind of paper you could just dangle in front of me and not expect me to read!” She cracked a smile, thinking back on reading the paper, hindsight making it all the more humorous. “I even cancelled a date with Mel that night to keep reading,” she said, getting a small laugh from Cynthia.

“I’m not following. Why would anything in that paper make me want nothing to do with you?” she asked, scouring her mind to remember what she had written verbatim.

She had stepped back enough to allow Diantha to cross her legs, getting herself as comfortable on the countertop as she could, mindful of the glasses on the shelves below her. “I had never heard of the Distortion World, nevermind half the pokémon you wrote about. It was equal parts horrifying and…” She shook her head. “Fascinating. Here was what might have been one of the most horrifying firsthand accounts I had ever read in my life. All written in such a way that…You were the bravest, most daring– truly inspiring woman I had never even met.”

As quickly as the mood had changed, Diantha managed to bring it right back around.

Her red lips pulled up into a smile. “And then I saw you in person for the first time,” she began more softly. “And not only were you all of that, you were the most beautiful woman I had ever seen. And you were smiling, and I remember you laughing at something Steven and Wallace were saying to you. Smiling with the two of them like you weren’t someone who probably has some of the most horrifying imagery burned on the back of her eyes.”

Cynthia found herself hesitating. In a way, she felt understood. Understood in a way that nobody aside from Dawn or Steven seemed to. She had always been treated as though she simply rolled with the punches and didn’t have any sort of negative effects from the Distortion World.

Thankfully, it had been a while since her last nightmare about the place, and dark rooms had gone back to being comforting rather than triggering.

“You were brave, daring, and inspiring, but above and beyond all of that– you are…” She blinked a few times, trying to gather the right phrasing. “So resilient in a world that is so unkind.” She wanted to reach out to touch her, lay a gentle hand on her cheek, kiss the other. Anything to let to not just tell her, but show her how she had felt then, and still felt now. She restrained herself, wanting to leave as much distance as Cynthia needed, knowing very well she was saying…A lot.

A tightness had gathered in the back of Cynthia’s throat, overwhelmed with emotion. Understanding, kindness– they had been so casual up to that point. She did consider them friends, but there was something in the undertone of what she was saying– She had to beg herself to not blurt out that she loved her. Even though it was all she wanted to say, she was terrified it would be too emotional.

Too much.

Too soon.

Too vulnerable.

“And so who was I in comparison to you? Why would anything about me attract the attention of someone as all-around stunning as you? I’m just…” She shrugged, squeezing herself. “Just some woman who was lucky enough to be born into a family with enough wealth and status to afford all the schooling to make me a teen actress. The only awards tied to my name stem from nothing more than the sheer luck of being considered ‘conventionally attractive’,” she said with a bit of a sneer.

The dig at herself was enough to pull Cynthia back into herself. “I’m not about to let you tear yourself down to make me seem taller,” she said. “Miss Always In The Running For Most Charitable Celebrity.” She wasn’t the only one who had looked up the other out of curiosity at some point.

“Come now, darling, do what the media does and remind yourself that it’s nothing more than a PR stunt,” she said, unwilling to accept the compliment.

That upset Cynthia. “A PR stunt would require you drawing more attention to yourself rather than whatever cause you’re giving to. At least within the circles I run in, I’ve never once heard of you doing that.”

It was a sort of unwavering support she received from rarely anyone outside of Siebold. Mel had always dismissed the worry, saying she needed to get unstuck from her head, fuck the media— support that never truely eased her mind.

Silence sat heavy between them, broken only by the soft sound of fabric moving as Cynthia shifted her weight to the other foot.

“Sorry–” Cynthia eventually said. “If there’s one thing I’m good at, it’s killing the mood–”

“No–”

They both clearly had the bad habit of cutting themselves down. Diantha hoped it would be something they could work on together.

“Darling, I’m the one who started all of this,” she reminded. She had brought up the Distortion World Papers to begin with. “I’m finding myself…I don’t know…Amused? At all the invisible strings we had tied to one another. Maybe it really was only a matter of time before something gave and one of us reached out to the other in some way.”

Cynthia breathed a laugh, letting the tension fall from her shoulders as she stepped closer one again. “Can I tell you a secret?” she asked.

Diantha hummed her question.

“I also thought you were absolutely stunning when I first met you,” she admitted.

She smiled, relaxing her arms, a silent invitation to step back inside her orbit, should she choose. She did. “You did?”

She nodded. “I’m a sucker for blue eyes,” she said, getting a genuine laugh from her. “I just remember you shaking mine then Steven’s hands, introducing yourself, but off in a hurry. Since your region was hosting, neither of us held it against you– we just turned to each other and went ‘oh my god’.” she said, getting another laugh. “And I remember Steven saying something about you being even more stunning in person, and– yeah, he was absolutely right.”

The wave of emotions that crashed over her– they really could have saved themselves a lot of trouble had they just had the courage to say something.

She breathed a laugh, shaking off some of the tension in her body. “Had I just gotten over myself–”

Cynthia had been thinking the same thing, but shook her head. “But– if I’m being honest, five years ago…?” She shook her head. She would have been 22, almost 23. “That was still so recent to my ex cheating on me. I’m honestly glad you didn’t know me then. I was in…such a shitty place– Steven even called me out a few times on things I did or said. I needed these last five years to even figure out what kind of person I wanted to be. Because me five years ago? You probably wouldn’t have ended up liking me, because I know I didn’t like who I was trying to be.”

She wanted to ask her to elaborate, feeling the confession was out of character. How could anything the woman in front of her do or say something that would have caused such a reaction from Steven of all people?

Cynthia crossed her arms, internally cursing herself for killing the mood once more. “I mean– you experienced firsthand how I was at the beginning of filming,” she pointed out. It wasn’t entirely fair for her to talk about herself from five years prior as if that version of herself no longer existed. She still reared her head in plenty of ways.

Diantha shook her head, tucking her hair behind her ear. “I’m not following,” she said.

Heat clawed up the back of her neck. “The way I assumed the absolute worst of you. How I thought you were only trying to help me as a way of mocking me– Diantha– that’s how I used to treat everyone. Steven, too…”

There was something so…brutally honest about it– so painfully self-aware.

“I don’t even remember what I was being passive-aggressive about, but he finally had enough and just said to me, ‘It genuinely breaks my heart how you always assume the worst of me.’” She shook her head, still mad at her younger self for going down such a path. “Clearly I still have some work to do,” she added with a forced laugh.

Diantha slid off the countertop, grabbing both of her hands. “Can I tell you a secret?” she asked.

Cynthia breathed a laugh, silently nodding.

She leaned up, keeping her voice to a whisper. “I probably would have treated you badly, too,” she said, smiling when Cynthia ended up throwing her head back in a laugh, clearly not expecting the confession. “I know who I was at 22, I would have played the field with both you and Mel. I would have made you all the promises in the world and kept maybe half of them. That’s the kind of bad I was.”

“Don’t say that–” Cynthia tried to defend, but Diantha was quick to cut her off.

“My dear, I say this to let you know that I am well aware that I am not a perfect person. I don’t need you to be, either. I’m still glad I finally met you.”

Whether it was her intention or not, I’m still glad I finally met you. Finally. They had met five years ago, but in some ways, they really had only met recently.

It had been a long time since anyone had truly made Cynthia feel like there were butterflies in her chest. She had always hated the metaphor, finding the mental image to be more uncomfortable than anything– but how else was she supposed to describe the fluttery, Everything Is Going To Work Out, If you asked me to run away tonight I would do it without a second question, nauseating feeling in her chest?

“I’m glad I finally met you, too,” Cynthia said, Diantha quick to wrap her in a warm hug.

Cynthia had never considered herself necessarily good at letting herself want things, especially from other people. Wanting had only ever earned her pain, so it had been easier for her to want and expect nothing from anybody. Sure, she could go out on dates with people, but she always managed to find a reason as to why they couldn't work out. Occasionally the reasons were genuine– Dezerea had said she never wanted to get married, a perfectly acceptable reason. Most of the time, it was something superficial as not feeling a spark.

Diantha’s arms around her were so warm and secure– the wall she had so carefully laid brick by brick had come tumbling down, bringing with it every way she could possibly want...

#NaNoWriMo 2023 #WIP #WIP Wednesday #my fics #pokemon #phaesporiashipping #i'm glad i got to use this dialogue i had planned for a different phae story <3 #it's messy but it is my favorite section so far #Getaway Car Fic

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