#the og thought was i wanted to play with glasses + lighting more but i got lazy LMAO

[isjasz]

[Day 68]

More of the guys + cool glasses poses >:D

[tomiyeee]

donnie had. SO. much concept art lol. i really enjoyed the whole design process though. his base design is very difficult to work with because of the battleshell, but it gave me a lot of chances to get creative and i'm happy with the results :)

(also as a disclaimer so i don't get asked about this: i don't have motivation to finish raph or the wish art for donnie, so i'm just posting what i've got)

i didn't annotate these as much since there'd be a lot to write, but i'll write out some of my thought processes and go into some detail about his final design below the cut if you're interested! (it's long. i'm talkative 😔)

1st row - first iteration; much more literal 1:1 translation of his design into a fantasy setting. very steampunk-y. ended up completely scrapping it because, simply put, he looked more like an npc than a playable character. obviously, several features did still carry over throughout the design process :3 also wanted to imagine his attack pattern cuz i thought it'd be fun to incorporate his spider arms.

this was actually the first design of any of them i'd come up with! i've definitely learned a lot about genshin's character design style since then and i think it shows 😂

2nd row - playing around with the idea of a floating battleshell (rather than a backpack-like one in the the show & first version), inspired by nahida's cape. also hard light constructs/attachments. was leaning too into the sci-fi and rectangular motifs with the design, but i liked the idea.

3rd/4rth rows - concepts for his final outfit and shell designs (the colored/more-detailed pics are the more finalized ones). took a lot of inspiration from sumeru this time around. it's a lot sharper, shinier, and less rectangular than his og aesthetic, but i think it's more in-line with genshin's design philosophies.

5th row - not entirely sure why i went through all the trouble of making a 3d model for this. i mostly just thought it'd be fun and good for reference. i was right, but i don't know what to do with it now lol. can't be bothered to be a perfectionist about it though, so don't look too closely at it 😭

6th row - incomplete thumbnails of his burst/wish art. not super sold on that "wing" design in particular, but i do like the idea of his shell splitting and deploying hard light weapons/rocket launchers/etc sort of like in canon.

battleshell/misc notes - i'm thinking his battleshell is controlled using the pink sensor on the back of his coat, possibly in combination with his headset. it floats behind him by default and is sturdy enough to protect his back, but he can also freely fly it around like a drone if he wants. the holes on the side are mainly for the spider arms and the banners(?) and handles(?) with the blue/pink gradient are made of hard light and only appear when the shell is in use.

i imagine like in the series, his tech here isn't necessarily very reliant on his vision/powers; much of it he likely made himself long before he received a vision and he just uses his vision to enhance it.

his burst is a barrage of missiles from his shell that lock onto an enemy and deal a large burst of electro damage in an AOE. not sure if i want his skill to be a deployable or some sort of electro-infusion/boost 🤔 maybe something that involves deploying his shell to boost his damage while leaving him vulnerable, like a glass canon? though i'm not sure he'd be that sort of risk-taker... 😅 dunno! his signature weapon would totally be his tech bo though.

that's about all i can think of. thanks for reading!

[yonduismarrypoppins]

Kickback

Summary; “Was at a kickback playing spades. Didn't even know her, Jamaican with pretty eyes. She came over and asked if I would teach her how to play. I was like yeah she sat on my lap and next thing i know i was in a two year relationship. She still doesn't know how to play.”

Photos aren't mine, credit to the og owners

Warnings: mentions of alcohol but nobody's drinking, reader isn't necessarily Jamaican but imagine them however you want. Jack is down bad, as he should be. This is kinda self indulgent and I can't write endings, my apologies.

A/N: I was watching the ShxtsnGigs Podcast for inspo and the second I heard this tweet I had to write it.

Wrote this for @webinurcloset btw

I DO NOT GIVE ANYONE PERMISSION TO REPOST OR TRANSLATE AND REPOST, THIS IS MY WRITING

I AM NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR YOUR MEDIA CONSUMPTION, THIS IS AN 18+ BLOG MAKING THIS 18+ CONTENT. MOVE ON MINORS.

Druski had sent a text to Urban about a last minute party, only 15 people or so. Jack decided that hanging out with some friends wouldn't be too bad, especially after the release of his newest album. He put on a simple white tank top, jeans, his glasses, his ‘Private Garden’ ring and some white new balance sneakers.

He waited in the car for Urban to finish getting ready, looking through his phone in the driver's seat making sure he had the address. He then checked out Druskis' story to see if he knew anyone else there, he noticed the house. The perfect place for a chill party, he thought. He stopped at a clip of you laughing your ass off when someone's soda exploded. Clicking on the right side of his screen for what felt like the thousandth time in a row just to hear your laugh over and over again, ‘typa’ shit people write songs about’, he thought.

The passenger door suddenly opened and shut “Aight, lets go.” Jack quickly hit the power button on the side of his phone, shoving it in his pocket “Word”.

The drive was quick, only making one stop for gas and some candy.

Once they arrived Urban made a beeline for the living room in the form of a conversation pit. He watched as Urban carefully made his way down the ramp, dapping Druski up before sitting down. Jack took a second to admire the house and headed to the kitchen. He searched the fridge, pleasantly surprised at the lack of alcohol he grabbed a ‘Sprite’ and walked towards the two seater couch in the corner, surrounded by windows. Not much light came through due to the night sky but the stars were beautiful regardless. Once again he found himself on his phone, scrolling aimlessly before he was interrupted.

“Hey man” he looked up, finding the source of the voice to be Urban “We ‘finna play cards, want in?” “Sure” he stood. “What are we playing?” “Spades”.

As he made his way down the ramp he noticed you, isolated in the corner laughing in Druskis' general direction. He made his way in front of you, “Can I?” he pointed towards the seat next to you. You looked up at him and nodded with a smile, and pulled your blanket onto your lap. He maneuvered around the tables and sat down, placing his can in front of him. He turned to you and held out his hand, “I'm Jack, you?” you chuckled, “I know who you are, it's nice to meet you”. You shook his hand. “How are you liking the party so far?” “It's cool, this house is awesome. I thought you couldn't get conversation pits any more.” you smiled “you can't, I had to get it built after I bought the house”

Jack took a second to process your words “this is your place?” “yes” Jack turned his body towards you “damn, you got good taste” your smile still had not faltered “thank you”.

Your little bubble popped when an empty ‘Coke Can’ hit Jack's shoulder. “Hey, you still gon’ play?” Jack turned to face the table and leaned forward “Yea, deal me in” he turned back to you “you playin’? “I don't know how” he smiled slyly, “I'll teach you” you leaned forward and rested your head on his shoulder “ok”.

------------------------------------------------------

Two Years Later

You were sitting outside, cuddled with your favorite blanket talking to Druski, Urban and his girl, Sunny and Cozane when Jackman walked out of the back door. “I found the pickle chips!”

Everyone around the fire pit broke out in ‘horrays’ while you smiled. Jack made a beeline towards you, handing off the large green bag before sitting down and pulling you into his lap. He looked down at you with so much love, “You havin’ fun baby?”. You smiled up at him and responded “Yes” before leaning up to kiss him. After a solid 15 seconds there was a chorus of gags and other expressions of disgust that made you both giggle before separating and facing the other people around the fire. “Oh shut up y'all are cute” Urbans girl said, she was always sweet to you even though you'd only known each other for a few months when she started dating Urban.

“Aight’ enough of this, who wants to play spades?” Druski said, pulling a deck of cards out of his pants pocket. “How are we gonna play spades around a fire?” Sunny said quizzically. “I don't know, yall are ruining the vibe, y/n play with me right quick” “I cant play spades” you said, everyone looked at you, Jack looked down at you and said “I thought i taught you the night we met?” Your smile brightened tenfold, “you tried to but I honestly wasn't paying attention.” You’ll tell him the reason another day, deciding that a spontaneous ego boost might not be what this moment needs. Jack smiled and laughed along with everyone else in the yard.

In that moment Jack thought about how glad he was to have sat next to you that night and to be sitting next to you now, he also reminded himself to actually teach you how to play cards.

I wrote something I'm kinda proud of, what!!??!?!? In other news, would yall be ok if I wrote for marvel and obx? I'm hyperfixating rn and i need an excuse to get m ideas out, i might have you guys vote on what I should write next 😏

Also if you want to be on my Taglist tell me pls.

Taglist

@floriidakilos

@zendayassimp

[imogenkol]

Old Scars and New

word count: 3.3k warnings: blood, injury tending, disaster bisexual werewolf being cringe af tags: bandaging/stitching up wounds prompt

this is a slightly altered/updated version of my most popular piece of writing for this verse and thought I'd share it in my continued journey of rebuilding my relationship with my og works!

“Alright, who’s up first?” Nadya announced once everyone filed into the motel room.

Skye flashed a sly grin at the sight of Nadya putting her glasses on. “Ooh, are we gonna play doctor?”  

Jayde rolled her eyes and dumped her bag onto the floor, barely holding back a wince. The scent of her own blood invaded her lungs and she already felt bruises forming, but the aches and pains were far from uncommon occurrences. She dismissed any concern. “I’m fine.” 

Nadya ignored their comments and pointed at both of the siblings. “You two. Sit.”

“Are you going to tell me to roll over too?” Skye remarked. 

At the same time, Jayde reiterated grumpily “I said I’m fine.”

The human threw them a stern glare. Nadya may appear soft and approachable most of the time – even meek to those who underestimated her – but the wolves quickly discovered that she had a hidden talent for intimidation when she wanted to. Jayde and Skye simultaneously took their seats at the edge of one of the beds without further protest. 

Satisfied with their obedience, Nadya turned to Toby. “How are you feeling?” 

“Right as rain,” he replied.

She made a spin motion with her hand. “Twirl.” He held up his arms and turned in one slow circle, showing her that he was unscathed. “Nothing’s hurting?”

“Nope.”

She concluded her thorough scan with a pat on his shoulder. “Okay, you’re good.” 

Toby gave the sisters a childish smirk like he won a game and said “Ha.” Then sauntered over to a chair. 

Well, if the game went to whoever got hurt the least, then Jayde would never win. She almost scoffed at herself because the competitive side of her that came out around Toby hated the fact that she’d lose anything to him. She even made a mental note to be more careful the next time they encountered hunters just so that she could rub her success in his face. Maybe that was his real motive – to try a tactic that would work on a toddler simply to get the reckless blonde to take better care of herself. Jayde wouldn’t put it past him. 

Nadya addressed Skye next. “You got hit on the head pretty hard. How are you feeling?”

The young wolf widened her eyes. “I can see new colors now.”

Nadya laughed and fished out a small flashlight from her bag. “How about dizziness or nausea?”

Jayde watched on as Nadya carefully combed her fingers through Skye’s hair in search of any damage hidden in the light blonde waves. Skye kicked her feet like a little kid getting a check-up, but Jayde noted how her crooked smile evened out to something more… genuine. 

Skye was rarely ever anything but mischievous, as if life were just one big joke to her. Of course, there were precious few moments when her serious self would shine through, where there were no jokes to be made and she acted fairly mellow, much to her older sister’s relief. Jayde was shocked to see that happen more often when she interacted with Nadya. 

“I feel fine,” Skye answered, then flinched when Nadya touched the sore spot on her head. “Ow! But that hurts.” 

“Sorry.” Nadya winced apologetically. “I don’t see any blood, at least.” 

The tip of her finger tapped under Skye’s chin to get her to look up. It was then that Jayde noticed she had been chewing on the inside of her cheek. Skye went still as Nadya shined the light in her eyes. It felt like an eternity to Jayde. To see Nadya be so close to her sister, touching her in ways that Jayde longed for. The older wolf realized – with a hot flush to her cheeks – that she was jealous of Skye. That made her bite her cheek even harder as she forced herself to look down. 

Nadya stepped away, allowing Jayde to finally breathe normally again. “You don’t have a concussion, but I suggest you ice that for tonight.” 

“Sounds good, doc,” she replied with a wink. 

Just when Jayde thought she might get over the momentary lapse in her emotions, Nadya blushed. It was subtle enough that she might have been able to convince herself that she imagined it, but her thoughts took what she saw regardless of rationality and ran. 

The possibility had never occurred to her until that moment, but Jayde started to wonder if maybe Skye had feelings for the human, too. Jayde certainly couldn’t blame her if she did. It was Nadya, after all. This girl practically had Jayde wrapped around her finger the first day they met. The thing that ate at Jayde more than that were Nadya’s reactions to Skye. She wouldn’t have that hard of a time believing she also felt something for her. Her sister – in all of her annoying glory – was just as much of a catch. 

The concept felt nearly unbearable to consider, but Jayde knew that she would never stand in the way of her sister’s happiness or Nadya’s. Especially if it meant Nadya would get to be with someone far more worthy of her affections. Deep down, Jayde has been looking for a good, rock solid excuse to let her go. This possible outcome might be the easiest to accept. That didn’t mean it wasn’t exceptionally painful. 

Wallowing in a pit of her own creation caused Jayde to tune the rest of the world out until Nadya’s voice brought her back down to earth. 

“Crap, I grabbed the wrong kit,” she grumbled as she sifted through her bag.

Skye gasped dramatically. “Language.” 

“You’re right, I’m sorry,” Nadya said with an amused scoff and backed up towards the door. “I’m gonna go back to the car. I’ll pick up some ice for your head on the way back, too.” 

“Toby,” Jayde commanded with a purposeful glance. Despite being clear of immediate danger, she didn’t want anyone going anywhere by themselves. Not even to the parking lot. 

He nodded in understanding and got up. “Yeah, I’ll go with her.”  

Before they left, Nadya locked eyes with Jayde. For that single second, all of her worries were utterly nonexistent. “We’ll be back in a few minutes. Try not to get into any more trouble.” 

“No promises,” Skye replied. Jayde looked to see that the devious smirk had returned to her face. 

The siblings remained seated on the musty motel bed once Toby and Nadya disappeared. The comforter felt scratchy, but Jayde still balled her fists into the fabric and stared at the worn carpet underneath her blood splattered boots. Something metallic tickled the edge of her tongue and she sighed at the sting that shortly followed, releasing her flesh from her own vengeful teeth. 

“So, what crawled up your ass?” Skye asked to break the awkward silence. 

Jayde gave her a brief side-glance. “Nothing.” 

“Right.” Her words already dripped with sarcasm. “You’re just acting like you have to take Old Yeller out back for no reason.” 

Jayde felt a brief spark boil in her chest, but it died out as quickly as it came. She didn’t have the will to be angry or defensive. She only sighed again and forced her question out. “Do you like her?”

There was no hesitation in Skye’s answer. “Yeah, of course I like her.”

“No, I mean… Do you like her?"

Confusion twisted the younger wolf’s features as she blinked at Jayde for several moments. Jayde wordlessly begged not to make her spell it out. The question alone was already mortifying enough. As soon as her meaning fully sank in, Skye’s expression promptly turned incredulous. 

“Forget it,” Jayde said curtly.

But Skye already jumped on it. “No, you know what? I do like her. I really, really like her. Yeah, I want her to have my babies.” 

Jayde had to fight the urge to growl. “It was a genuine question, Skye.” 

“And you’re a genuine idiot,” she fired back with no remorse. “I don’t want your girlfriend, Jayde.” 

“She’s not my girlfriend.” 

“She could be.”

“She shouldn’t.” 

Skye raised an eyebrow. “That’s not very progressive of you. You’re sounding like Miranda with that old world bullshit. Who cares if Nadya is a human? Just be careful not to break or bite her. That simple.” 

Jayde shook her head. “It’s not that…” 

The slow nod she saw out of the corner of her eye turned into a shrug as Skye leaned into her. “What if you’re wrong about yourself?” she whispered like a kid telling a secret. 

They fell back into another prolonged silence as Jayde rocked back and forth anxiously. She wasn’t wrong about herself, but Jayde somehow still had the smallest bit of hope that she could become someone Nadya deserves. That if she tried to be better, she wouldn’t fight this so hard or put herself through all of this pain. She had it in her. Somewhere. Buried underneath dirt and dust. The best version would peek through the cracks of everything broken about her whenever that girl was near. Jayde just had to figure out a way to widen the fractures and reach through. 

But she worried she would break herself even more by doing that. 

After a minute, her lungs deflated once more in utter hopelessness. “I am an idiot.” 

Familiar footsteps approached the room and Skye nudged her older sister with her elbow. “Chin up, sport.” 

Jayde managed to give her a grateful look just as the others returned. Nadya held a small bag of ice in one hand and a different first aid kit in the other. She went to Skye first and handed her the ice for her head. 

Guilt immediately flooded Jayde’s system for feeling so jealous. Nadya put in so much effort to take care of them all and Jayde had been worried that she wanted her sister over her. She needed to get over herself. 

“Okay, you’re good to go. Just take it easy,” Nadya ordered. 

Skye enthusiastically jumped to her feet while balancing the ice pack on top of her head. “Great, I’m gonna go get tacos across the street.” 

“Don’t go alone,” Jayde called as she skipped towards the door.

She waved dismissively. “Yeah, yeah, buddy system.” 

“You guys want anything?” Toby asked before he trailed after her.

“Just get me whatever you get,” Jayde said.

“Okay. Nadya?”

Nadya sounded slightly distracted as she prepared the kit. “Uh, what kinds are there?” 

“Asada, pollo, carnitas.” When she took too long to ponder the options, he translated in a patronizing tone “Beef, chicken, pork.” 

She looked up and fixed him with an exasperated stare. “I know what they mean, I was just thinking.” 

Toby chuckled. “Any day now.” 

“Get me chicken.” 

He gave a casual thumbs up. “You got it.” 

The motel room grew quiet again once it became only the two young women. The wolf took time to let the human’s presence calm the restless being within. She focused on how her air of crisp autumn spices encompassed her senses, even over the scents of the others. What fascinated Jayde was how her existence always broke through the most powerful things. Werewolves had an incredibly distinct and potent scent, so being around her pack should have masked the humanness of Nadya’s scent. But it didn’t. In fact, Jayde often sensed her before she sensed anything or anyone else. It was always her first. 

“Your turn?” Nadya suggested softly, immediately drawing Jayde’s full attention. 

Up to that point, she had completely forgotten about her injuries. “Oh, right.” 

Nadya came directly to her, standing just inches away. Jayde stared up at her and waited, totally transfixed. “Let’s get a look at that arm.” 

Jayde realized she needed to remove her jacket. She snapped herself out of her trance and carefully slipped out of it, grimacing as the fabric tugged at the graze on her bicep. Blood had mostly soaked into the jacket itself, but streaks of crimson still smeared across her skin and reached as low as her wrist.

Nadya bent down and adjusted her glasses to get a better look, but that furrow in her brow looked like it took too much effort. “Do you think we could move to the bathroom? The lighting sucks out here and I gotta get you cleaned up.” 

“Yeah.” 

Nadya followed closely behind as they entered the bathroom, but lingered over Jayde’s shoulder after turning the light on. “Hey, did you take a hit to the back?” 

Jayde craned her neck to see why she looked so concerned, but couldn’t see much of anything. The strain of twisting only made her injured shoulder spike with pain. “Um, I’m not sure. Maybe? I remember getting punched or something.” 

“There’s blood, Jay,” Nadya informed her, still inspecting the wound. “Take this off.” 

Jayde felt her entire body flare with intense heat as Nadya tugged at her shirt. She hesitated for a few beats to let the embarrassment pass. It wasn’t like Nadya hadn't seen her without a shirt on before. Hell, she’s seen her naked. She’s seen her turn into a goddamn werewolf, for fuck’s sake. Jayde wanted to curse at herself for being so stupid. 

She struggled to get out of the shirt on her own. It was enough that her shoulder felt as sore as it did, but now that she had been made aware of it, the wound on Jayde’s back stung like a bitch. As much as she wanted to hide her pain, she wasn’t able to stop herself from flinching when she tried to work one of her arms out of the ruined clothing. 

“Here, let me –” Nadya reached to help, but then her pulse spiked in the wolf’s ears like a drum had been struck and she stopped short. “Can I..?”

“Sure, yeah,” Jayde stammered and braced herself as the human stepped into her space. 

Nadya’s hands carefully gripped the bottom of the bloodied shirt and slowly pushed it up her torso. Jayde could tell that she tried not to, but there were still a couple of times where her fingers brushed up against bare skin. Jayde clenched her jaw tightly. Just those small, brief touches caused intense tingling to spread outwards from the places of contact. She shut her eyes and held her breath as her wolf fought to rise to the surface. A shiver raced along Jayde’s spine as she quickly dampened it. After a tense half-second, she felt the restless animal reluctantly retreat. 

Despite nearly losing control, Jayde didn’t feel afraid. Maybe because she knew Nadya wasn’t in any danger. The wolf only wanted a glimpse of her, but the last thing Jayde wanted was to cause any potential fear. She certainly didn’t want to think up some shitty excuse to explain why her eyes started to glow. 

The two of them successfully got the shirt over Jayde’s head with minimal pain and discarded it on the floor. Meeting Nadya’s gaze after that felt far braver than facing any hunter. She had this look in her warm brown eyes that Jayde couldn’t quite decipher. However, the physical effect in Nadya’s body was more obvious. Being so close, Jayde sensed it all. 

An erratic heartbeat. A clipped breath caught in her throat. A blooming scent that tempted Jayde nearer. 

Those were not things she noticed in Nadya with anyone else, Jayde realized. 

“I’m going to, uh…” Nadya motioned awkwardly, finally just shuffling behind her again. 

Jayde cleared her throat to banish her own nerves and brushed her tangled hair over her shoulder. “How’s it looking back there?” 

“This is pretty deep,” she murmured and began to clean it. “You really didn’t feel this?”

Jayde tensed at the incredibly cold sensation of a disinfectant wipe against her hot skin, but she still gave a half shrug. “I remember being hit, but that’s all.” 

“Well, you got lucky. It could have punctured your lung.”

Jayde set her hands on the edge of the sink and watched Nadya’s reflection carefully through the mirror. “Yeah, I feel lucky.” 

“That better not be sarcasm. Not when I’m looking at all these scars.” Nadya scolded as she got the stitches ready. “It looks like you should be dead ten times over.” 

“It’s because I should be.” 

They briefly shared a look. Nadya’s expression remained unreadable. Not that Jayde had the time to properly study it before she went back to work. 

She didn’t say anything while she made a few sutures — being too focused on her task of mending a werewolf — but then Jayde saw her brown eyes peek over her shoulder again. “I’m really glad you aren’t, by the way.” 

Jayde exhaled an almost whispered response. “Me too.”  

A bandage was carefully placed over the newly stitched wound, but Nadya lingered behind her. Jayde wondered if maybe she had spotted another wound that hadn’t quite traveled through her nerves and up to her brain yet, but then felt an incredibly delicate sensation tickle her lower back. It took a moment for her to realize that it was the tip of Nadya’s finger trailing over what had to be one of her scars. Jayde froze in place, not having a single clue how to react. 

“How many are there?” Nadya’s voice sounded distant. 

Jayde gripped the edges of the sink so that she wouldn’t fall over as the girl traced another sensitive mark. She was afraid that the slightest movement would cause her to stop. “I’ve never counted.” 

A soft hum echoed in the bathroom. “I guess you’ve got a couple more now. Which reminds me…” Nadya pulled her hand away, but before disappointment twisted an invisible knife in the werewolf’s chest, her palm rested on her hip and turned her around. 

The human’s sudden willingness to touch her in ways that could be considered intimate left Jayde’s mind in a utter stupor, stirring her inner self once more. She didn’t know what to make of it. Or what to do. She knew what she wanted to do, though that remained a line Jayde felt she shouldn’t cross. 

Nadya went to work on the laceration that cut through her upper arm and Jayde found herself thoroughly fascinated with the process. The human’s eyes were so focused, making sure each and every stitch was up to her standard. The way her brows knitted in concentration — the thin frame of her glasses resting on the bridge of her nose — replaced Jayde’s heart with a pair of fluttering wings. She could stare at her for hours. 

Nadya finally glanced up while she wrapped her arm. This time, her blush was entirely noticeable. “What?” 

The question made Jayde realize she had been smiling. She quickly looked away, though she couldn’t fully wipe the expression from her face. “Nothing.” 

“Okay,” Nadya said slowly, confused amusement written on her face. “Well, I’m all done.” 

Jayde nodded as she cleaned the mess up. As soon as the kit was packed, Nadya gave the wolf an unsure look and turned to leave the bathroom. On impulse, Jayde caught her wrist to stop her. A small gasp escaped Nadya’s lips at the unexpected touch, but she still waited expectantly. 

“Thank you.” Jayde caressed the smooth curve of her wrist with her thumb. For the first time, she didn’t try to hide it. She wanted Nadya to feel her gratitude. “For taking care of us.” 

Nadya’s features softened into an absolutely stunning smile. “I like taking care of you.” 

It took everything Jayde had not to pull her in. She yearned to feel Nadya against her. Longed to brush their lips together. To hold her close and swallow every breath. Feel all the ways she could get her heart to race. Instead, Jayde’s fingers went slack and Nadya slipped out of her grasp, leaving her alone in the bathroom with the ghost of her contact still prickling across the surface of her skin.

tag list (ask to be added or removed!): @adelaidedrubman @florbelles @marivenah @simonxriley @shegetsburned @voidika @kyber-infinitygems @statichvm @inafieldofdaisies @socially-awkward-skeleton @aceghosts @jillvalentinesday @risingsh0t @unholymilf @thedeadthree @cassietrn @jackiesarch

[a-sterling-rose]

Day 11: Underwater- Spectra Redesign

I have been talking with @dnpanimationstudioclone about how different Danny Phantom villain’s could have worked if approached in slightly different ways. On the topic of Spectra, I thought up a version of Spectra that is more ocean themed rather than shadow.

Here is a link their version: https://www.tumblr.com/dnpanimationstudioclone/717062531941810176/day-11-underwater-i-designed-my-own-version

TRIGGER WARNING: Mentioning of Pedophilia, ephebophilia, sexual abuse predator character.

Origin:

New Design:

Her sucker fish ghost form makes it more obvious as to why you feel so disgusting after being her touched by her, she needing to get physical contact to properly feed of emotions. This mucus constantly oozes from Spectra, this being the main substance that aids her emotional eating. It also makes capturing her nearly impossible as the mucus is incredibly slippery.You have to purely rely on long distant attacks when facing her.

Fixed lighting for the monster form:

For this version, I wanted to play more into her being more associated with a dark blue. Not only is darker blues associated with maturity, it gives a more mysterious and maturity. The dark blue is to also show this Spectra died on a cloudy night. I left the ‘sexy teacher’ troupe despite going for a true predator. This is to play more into how she tries to be more approachable to teenagers as her ‘direct approach’ is what got her killed in the first place. This makes her much more predatory: a sheep in wolfs clothing. This dress perfectly hides how bloated Spectra’s body is as the result of her drowning. Her strangely wavy hair shape was vaguely inspired by the shaping of a facehugger. I made her a brunette as I wanted her hair color to be the same as the mucus she produces. I added pearls to show how this Spectra is still fashionable. I made her teeth the same color as her nearly orange skin as to show how disgusting she is on the inside. I left out her glasses as I see this Spectra isn’t nearly as insecure about her older age. In fact, that’s what makes the challenge of finding some cute guppy’s to ‘catch’. 

I was going to lean more into her OG ghost form when I first started. However, I happened to remember the true vampire form of Shalltear Bloodfallen from Overlord, and I got a bit more inspired. I see this Spectra always relying on her mucus as a way to move around. It only adds in how inhuman Spectra is.

I love the idea of Mr. Lancer being her main obstacle. He not only showing he believes in equal rights, but he never wanting any of his students to face true harm like this. @dnpanimationstudioclone also brought up a good point about not wanting to go into fat-shaming territory. So, seeing as Lancer is a bigger person himself, I think this would balance out the body representation.

Anyway, I hope you were entertained.

[bumblepony]

20 questions for fic writers

I got tagged by @oliviassunrise & @ameerawrites.

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

47

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

249,465

3. What fandoms do you write for?

TLOU

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

Unexpected Consequences

Like You Were Always Meant To Be Here

Glitch in the Code or Playing Video Games with My Uncle and Dad

After The Rain

A Soul For Sale Or Rent

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I do try very hard to, I appreciate everyone who takes the time to say something nice about more work or to ask questions, So I want them to know that.

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I think its a tie with Look For Your Light and Dancing On Glass though both are unfinished so the ending could get better!

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

It's gotta be Like You Were Always Meant To Be Here its just so fluffy!

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I've only really got one negative comment and I just deleted it and moved on. But I also don't go super angst which I am not against I just am not good at writing it so I think that's why.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Yes, Yes I do. I write all kinds. M/M F/M. Older gay men Bill/Frank were my OG's on TLOU fandom. Now I've moved to Tess/Joel and Tommy/Maria and some Joel/Male OC's. I'm up for almost all kinds of Smut.

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

No

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Nope

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

No

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I have done a few back-and-forth fics with people here on Tumblr, @tlouobsessed, @mariatesstruther @clickergossip I think there are more but I can't remember them all. I am so sorry if I forgot anyone.

14. What's your all-time favourite ship?

It's gotta be Joel/Tess they are my bae's

15. What's the WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I think my roller derby WIP. Like I really want to write it but I just don't see it happening.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Damn, I don't know. I feel like I am good at looking at a sentence and saying, "That does not make sense, or something is off here." But that's it. I also do happy and fluffy pretty good.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

ANGST, I suck at it. I just don't like being sad, so I have trouble going there. I feel like I have gotten better at it, but I still am not super confident about it.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I have done Spanish before, but that's it.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Technically it was The Heralds Of Valdimar when I was 16 but publicly it would be TLOU.

20. Favourite fic you've ever written?

Shit this one is hard. I love all my stuff but I think it is A Soul For Sale Or Rent for right now.

I'm not gonna tag only because I know we are all going back and forth with this one, but if you want to do it please do!!

[squib-2006]

Next

I am going to rewatch one episode of ninjago a day until I ether give up or finish

I will put my thoughts down as I watch it and rate each episode out of ten.

Day 1

Ep 1 rise of the snakes

The old monastery was so empty

Those controllers are huge

I want to play what they are playing why can’t this be a real game

Not cool sensei wu you didn’t even let them save

Cole talks with Kai’s voice wow he is magic

Yes the tornado of creation the super op move that will only be used three(I think it’s three might be wrong) times throughout the intire series, but seriously so my situations could have been solved if they just made the tornado

The game magically didn’t reset and erase there progress

The people that “spotted lord garmadon” need to get glasses. How do you confuse an adult dark warlord, with a literal 10 year old

The ninja bumping into eachother looks so awkward but is still somehow funny

Jay being awkward around nya is always good for my Jaya heart

Really Kai you could have killed someone with opening the door with out checking if someone was under it

Also did the monastery always have a dragon stable or did they have to add it

Jay falling=peek Comedy

Kai stop being sexist to your sister

I miss the dragons they were so cool

Rocky and Cole friendship my beloved

Jays voice was so much lower in the first season it sounds weird to me cuz I’m used to him screeching every five seconds

Dragon acrobatics are cool

Jamanakai village the og village I wish we could go visit it in the newer seasons because I love how it looks

BABY LLOYD MY BELOVED
YOUR LAUGH GIVES ME JOY

You get ur candy baby

Cole saying that he escaped again implies this isn’t the first time they have delt with him

Wow these adults are a-holes. They gust throw rotten fruit at a child

Kai your parents literally fought in the serpentine wars your telling me they never mentioned anything about the serpentine ever

Why are they carrying Lloyd like that

Oh my god I remember them putting Lloyd up on the sign and finding it funny as a kid but now this just seems cruel

Zane paid for all that candy with a single coin

Mucacho, kai just called Lloyd muchacho. Why

Now they’re just bullying Lloyd with candy

“Kai about to get on his dragon” top ten moments before disaster

Why does wu have a dragon saddle bag

And you cannot tell me wu didn’t put that there on purpose to motivate them

What is it with kai and Cole steeling each other’s voices.

If it’s the “ancient language of our ancestors” how do you know how to read it. Like I know your a robot but still Zane I don’t think doctor Julian programed that in

This prophecy is incorrect because Lloyd is the green ninja

This competition is so stupid

I should just start a counter for how many times kai and Cole switch voices (3)

Setting up Kai’s obsession with the green ninja

How did Lloyd get to a snowy tundra wasn’t he just on a mountain village

Why is it so easy to open the tombs I think it should be a bit harder to release vengeful snake people

This Ice is so pretty

How is the snake now under Lloyds control if he hypnotized him self. Shouldn’t he be under his own control

Sneks

Any time baby Lloyd laughs I want to grab him and jut hug him so hard he screams because it is so cute

Any time jay gets hit by something I giggle I don’t know why it’s so funny to me

The kendo suits look so weird to me for some reason

Rip Cole

The combat here seems so clunky compared to modern day ninjago

Baby fire ball is adorable

Jay looks so sad poor bean

Rip pole

Where did the other Shuriken of ice go?

Oh there it is

And then the one underneath coles foot magically goes back to Zane despite it being trapped in the ice

Cole could have chopped Zane’s legs off

Wow petty much jay

When Cole smashes down the scythe of quakes the grounds textures glitch

Sword of fire gets to hot for Kai to control because he is getting to angry more evidence that the golden weapons are sentient

How does the stone light on fire and in a perfect circle around kai

Sparkles are pretty

Lean ninja. They knew what they were doing

Wu gets mad at them for training yet he is the one who wanted them to train

Why are those watermelons so tiny like the cucumbers are larger then them

Baby Lloyd is so cute even when terrorizing villagers

Wu be smoking the good stuff

Kai doesn’t care until he remembers that nya is there. He really loves his little sister doesn’t he

Jays voice was really low when he said “that leaves us with one choice” and then the “run” broke my eardrums

Stealth 100

Not all of them have tails nya

Jay stop being sexist to nya

Kai shaking his head at jay gives me life

Kai ignores his sisters advise and looks the snakes in the eyes

Kai’s whole body flattened when he hit the wall

Also physical Comedy = peek comedy

Always look where your going Lloyd

Also Lloyd is somehow need the fountain now

No one listens to nyas advice they all stare at the snakes

By golly made me cringe

Maybe if you hadn’t strung Lloyd up like a piñata and taken him to wu so much of this whole show could have been avoided

Wu never teaches them anything they ask him to

Patience nya you just have to wait thirteen seasons and you can become a dragon

Why didn’t the anti venom cure Cole

Final thoughts

This is a good intro into the season but it drags on a bit with the green ninja tournament and without watching the pilots you might be a bit confused. Lloyd was as cute as I remembered. The ninja go the other hand were a bit boring. I liked the set up they did and the animation was good if not a bit clunky. Over all I give this episode a 7/10

[beastie-anon]

okay can you do. Unhinged Dave x reader maybe? It can be angsty or fluffy it can be whatever just not nsfw please?

-(definitely not anyone you know. not at all (lying))

Yes of course I can random stranger that I just now met (lying)

Lemme think of what to write about- You can skip me talking to myself and go to 'read more' if you want

Okokokok SO

What if.

Both. Fluff then angst

Ohh man yes I know exactly what to write now

Y/N= YOUR NAME

H/L= HAIR LENGTH

H/C= HAIR COLOUR

E/C= EYE COLOUR

S/T= SKIN TONE

S/R= Soft/Rough

Tw: Kidnapping, Self harm, Mental abuse

Dave had met someone he really felt he had a connection with.. He couldn't help but be a tad bit, Well... Obsessed? He remembers it like it was yesterday. Because, Well, It was yesterday. He still couldn't let over Y/N's beauty.. Your H/L was perfect, And their H/C sparkled in the light so beautifully. The way your eyes glittered and had that beautiful E/C glint, And your skin looked so S/R, In a way that was perfect for him.. But most of all, The way you smiled at him. It gave him a bit more than butterflies.. He couldn't get you out of his head. Best of all, You gave him your phone number.. He decided to shoot his shot, And pushed 'call'..

....

Ring

....

Ring

....

Click

"..Hello? Who is this?"

"Hey! It's Dave, We met at the park yesterday!"

You remembered him! He was an awkward guy, But seemed kind. You both liked The Mandela Catalogue and roleplaying so you gave him your number! Hopefully you two could become friends. That's what you were hoping for when you gave him your number after all.

"Oh yeah! Hey Dave! Did you see the new episode of the Mandela Catalogue?"

"Oh uh- N-Not yet! Actually thats why I called.. D-Did you wanna maybe.. Watch it together?"

Perfect! You had already watched it, But... It couldn't hurt right? This could be fun! A chance to get closer and be friends. Or, Who knows.. Maybe more.

"Yeah of course! Where do you live? I'll come over!"

"Actually I-I can pick you up! Where are you?"

His voice was nervous, Trembling slightly from the anxiety.

"Oh! I'm at [Location]! Come pick me up whenever!"

"I-Its a date then! I just need to get ready!"

Wait- A date? Oh man.. This could either turn out great or awful.

He hung up excitedly! Now it was just time to get ready..

--------

Dave started looking through his closet.. A tuxedo? No, Too formal... Hoodie and sweats? No, Wayyy too casual.. How about... His robot outfit! Wait, No that's too weird... Y/N might not like it. He finally settled on a light grey long sleeved shirt, Dark grey shorts, And black shoes.

(An edit I made. Og is here)

He went to the bathroom and started to give himself a pep talk. "You've got this Dave... Gotta stay calm... Their so pretty, And kind, And handsome and.. PERFECT HHHAHAH.." He could feel himself riling up, So he punched the mirror and broke it. He took one of the shards, Pulled up his sleeves, And started to furiously cut his arm as fast as he could. "C-Ccalllmmm..." He was breathing heavy and started to clean the shards up, Along with picking the rest of the broken glass out of the shattered mirror. He could just lie and say he's replacing it.. He threw most of it in the trash, But kept an especially big broken piece and hid it... He was calm, He could do this..

It was time to leave. He started to set out snacks for when he got back, Setting up his computer for when he got back with Y/N, Grabbing a few.. 'Necessities' to put in the car. His gun, Like usual. Some rope incase he needed to pull the car home, And a body bag incase Y/N turned out to be.. Well, A murderer or something. He shut and locked his trunk before driving off to pick them up.

It was around a 30 minute drive, And he memorized every single turn as he drove. You were outside, Playing on your device and talking to your friends. You never left your steps, But were kind of debating on going inside. It was getting late, It was cold, And he probably wasn't coming. At least, Thats what you thought until a car pulled up with a familiar anxious face.

"Dave!! Hey, It's nice to see you!"

"Hey Y-Y/N! Whats up? Are you.. Y-You ready?"

"Yeah! But can you tell me where we're going? I'd like someone to know what address I'm gonna be at so I can have someone know where I am.. You are basically a stranger haha!"

He nodded with a smile.

"It's, Ahhh w-where was it? I cant really remember.. I-I'm sorry I just moved here."

That'd explain why you had never seen him before.. Well, You needed SOME kind of ensurance he wouldn't kidnap you or something, So you snapped a picture of him and got in the car.

"It's k! I'll just sent this to Ray so if anything happens they'll know who to go to first!"

Dave nodded and seemed anxious. "Aah... So s-someone has my picture now?" He recognized the name 'Ray'.... This could be a nuisance.

Ray got the picture and immediately panicked, They knew this guy from.. somewhere, They just couldn't remember where. They were about to warn you when their power cut out.. Oh no, Y/N..

Dave started to drive to his place, Smiling and talking to you. You two mostly chatted about TMC and plot for a non existent show you would both never make. Dave wasn't too good at it though, But he was definitely trying. Everything he'd say would somehow turn... Dark, Though. Strange..

You finally reached his house, And you quickly snapped a photo to send to your friend Ray. It was weird that they hadn't responded, Usually they'd either make a joke or let you know they were at least watching out for you.. Maybe they were busy. You both entered his living room, Which was neat and had a minimal amount of things there. Maybe he wasn't lying about having just moved there! You both sat down and began to watch the newest episode. It was cute seeing Dave's expressions light up or bet upset over the show, He seemed to really like Stanly. He made a remark about him being a 'skrunkly 3 rubber bands'

"Reminds me of the time me and my friend put so many rubber bands on their hand and he had to get it amputated! Haha!"

...Shouldn't that be a bad thing to think about?

"Is your friend okay?"

"O-Oh? Yeah I think he died a while ago. H-He wasn't the smartest.."

He muttered it a bit.. The atmosphere seemed to completely change after that. Instead of a light hearted mood, It was now awkward and the air felt stale..

"I'll b-be back. I gotta use the bathroom."

Dave excused himself and went to the bathroom. When he opened the door, The disgusting stench of what smelt like decay filled the air. It had to be something dead.

Dave went inside, Cursing at himself for forgetting to move the thing rotting away slowly in his bathtub. He had gotten so accustomed to the smell since Dale usually kept his meat there, But since Dale was the body in the bathtub there was nobody to take it away. He didn't even remember why he ended up doing what he did to Dale.. He was only 14 after all. The cheapest and best on the market, And only Dave knew about him. Oh well, Far too late now... He quickly sprayed as much perfume as he could, But the smell of decay and rotted organs didn't disappear. Now it just smelled sickingly sweet as well.. He sliced his arms quickly and multiple times, Breathing even heavier than before from the anger. STUPID, STUPID! HOW COULD HE HAVE FORGOTTEN SOMETHING SO MAJOR?! He would just have to keep that door shut until you were gone. He turned on the sink and pulled down his sleeves.

You didn't have a good feeling about this.. You tried calling Ray, But it didn't even ring.. Why was their phone off? You messaged them and told them to call you as soon as possible. This place didn't feel right.

He turned the knobs until the water stopped, Leaving and shutting the door tightly behind him as he took a moment to recompile himself, Driplets of blood tracing down his arm and down his hand. He wiped it on his pants and kept his arms up, Folding them purposely to have the blood just drip straight down his arm and into his shirt instead of out his sleeves.

"Sorry that took so long!"

He had that innocent smile still.

"Dave, What was that horrible smell?! Did something die in there?"

Usually that'd be taken as a joke, But you were completely serious. The smell of death was unmistakable..

"Actually... Y..Yeah. My, Well... My cat... It hurts too badly to get rid of him, So I have to keep him in there... I'm... I'm sorry..."

He had tears swell up in his eyes, He was an incredible actor.

"Oh... I'm sorry, I didn't realize.."

That was disgusting and really weird, But it would be hard not to believe him. You just took his word.. Poor animal, It should've been buried a while ago.. Now that smell of death will never come out of his house.

Dave sat down and seemed sad. He had to keep reminding himself what faces to make and what not to say or do. He was supposed to be sad and uncomfortable right now, Not excited and happy that Y/N was buying his lies. He slowly settled into a smile and cracked a few jokes to lighten the damp awkward mood, But he could tell you were still unsettled.

"...Hey! I-I know, We should go stargazing!"

"..Stargazing?"

That sounded better than sitting in this strangers house who has a decaying cat in his bathroom.

"You know what- Yeah! Yeah we should! Let's go, Just your front yard or-?"

"Nah I k-know the perfect place. It's not too far from here, On a hill!"

You nodded. An open hill, Where you could run if you needed to? I mean, The man has prosthetic legs. He isn't gonna be able to catch up if you run. If you needed, You could just push him over. You followed him out to the car again and he drove off. You didn't recognize your surroundings after a certain point and started to freak out. You frantically texted your friend who still didn't answer.. Dave had locked the car doors and was going over the speed limit.

"D-Dave, Stop the car."

He looked confused and slowed to a stop. When he put the car in park, The doors automatically unlocked.

..Maybe it was a misunderstanding? Some cars do auto lock, And maybe he was trying to get there faster.

"Oh n..nevermind. I thought I saw a deer, Sorry.."

"O...kay..?"

He started to drive off again, Towards the destination. He stopped near a hill and parked the car..

"We're here!"

He smiled at you brightly and got out of the car. You followed with a small smile, It was worth the wait... The stars were beautiful, And you could only see them so clear from all the way out here... It was so... Amazing.

"Oh! Give me a second, I brought picnic stuff in the car! Go pick a spot and sit down!"

Dave hurried back to the car while you found a nice spot to sit and stare at the sky... There weren't any lights for miles, It made everything so beautiful and bright in the sky. You no longer had any regrets...

...then it all went black, A pain in the back of your head.

"...Nighty night my prince(ss).."

..You woke up, Tied and bound to a hard metal pipe that was too sturdy to be ripped off the wall it was attached to. You tugged hard but eventually had to stop due to the rope burning your wrists. It hurt too badly and felt like you might make you'd wrists bleed. Dave heard the rope scratching against the pipe and came downstairs...

"..Your awake! Hello Y/N! Glad you finally woke up. Sorry I had to resort to this.. You just didn't seem to be liking me. And don't worry about your friend Ray, They've been taken care of.."

He... He didn't.

"..I hope you like roasts! Your friend was quite tall, I'm sure he'll be nice and tender for dinner."

You felt tears welling up in your eyes. That.. That MONSTER.. He... He wasn't going to make you eat them, Was he? He.. Couldn't be serious. He couldn't...

"Sorry Y/N, But you forced my hand.. If you had just come without a fight, Without telling him who I was, Showing him my face, Showing my house to him.. Oh well, It wasn't really my house anyways.. Dales parents were out of town. I wiped your conversation with eachother, If somehow they do recover the conversation... They'll just know what I look like. If I see any wanted posters, Well... I guess I'll just have to dye my hair and get realistic prosthetics won't I?"

The metaphoric dam finally broke as you began to sob, Tears falling down your face as you failed to kero yourself standing. You had lost everything that day. The one person who knew who and where to look, Your freedom, Your family.. Anyone who'd come close enough to find you, He'd probably just kill too.

"H-Hey why are you crying? He couldn't of been that good a friend. He let you come to my house alone, He didn't even tell you not to go." He hadn't posted anything and never messaged back. Your last actual conversation was you both showing the art you made and talking about lore... And now, You'd never be able to do it again....

Dave reached for you, And you flinched away. You were terrified of him, Of what he'd do, Who he'd hurt next..

He slowly pulled his hand away.

"...I lied. Your friends alive. I sent a message lying and saying you were walking home at around 1 AM then I broke your phone. It should be enough to keep the cops off my back.."

He sounded so genuine, But was he telling the truth or not? It was impossible to tell. You decided to take his word and just hope for the best..

"We're having pork for dinner."

He walked off, Leaving you to your thoughts... He went to the kitchen and pulled the cooked torso from the oven, Seasoning it well. He knew from experience that flesh tasted close to pork, So if he seasoned it enough and cut it up Y/N might never be able to tell.. It's better to give false hope that true fear, If it'd make you love him.

You ended up spending weeks there, And every day slowly you learned more and more about him... But he also learned more about you. He seemed to trust you and hang on every single word you said, And you could feel yourself getting closer to him whether you meant to or not. Every day you could feel your hate for him becoming less and less, Until you felt that the two of you might be able to be friends. Dave had a troubled past, He was a troubled kid. His parents hated him, Abused him.. Nobody at school liked him. He had to kill his dad because he beat him half to death, Which began his obsession with guns. It gave him a way to protect himself.. He was placed in foster care after his mom was put in jail for abuse too. Nobody did ever take him, And the people who did were just as bad if not worse than his parents.. No wonder he was so fucked...

One day he came downstairs, A knife in his hand.

...this was it. He got bored of you. You could feel tears swelling in your eyes as you started to struggle, Shaking from fear as your legs were limp from not moving for such a long time, And from the absolute terror stricken in you. He lifted the knife up before... Starting to cut off your ropes?

"Stop wiggling around! You'll make me accidentally hurt you.."

His tone was soft and gentle. When the ropes were cut you fell into his arms. You hadn't used your legs in months after all, They weren't used to moving anymore. He carried you up the stairs. The first room he had entered, The one right outside of the basement, Was a kitchen. It was neat, Except for the uncleaned red stain in the corner. The familiar stench of decay hit when they had walked past the fridge..

The next room they entered directly after the kitchen was a large living room. There was a huge TV, A big comfortable couch, A pretty big table, A nice soft designer rug, Bookshelves that lined the walls, And a mini chandelier.. But it definitely wasn't real glass.

He walked them up the stairs and into a bedroom. There was a typewriter, Bookshelves with tons of books, Every drawing utensil imaginable including a brand new drawing tablet (that couldn't access the internet) and arcade games! There was even a computer with almost every game you could imagine downloaded, Including FNF and most of the popular mods! The bed had a custom frame which was carved to look like a game controller.. Maybe being held captive wouldn't be so bad. There were no windows either, So the games could always be as bright as you needed if you didn't have the lights on! This definitely wasn't cheap..

"Sorry it took so long, I just... Had to find a way to get things ready. I hope you like it!"

You looked up at him. This was the first time you felt genuine happiness in a while... He decided to press his luck and kiss you on the cheek, And due to his height he had to bend down to do so. You didn't push him away this time, But you were still a bit uncomfortable with it. Maybe you'd finally be able to talk to your friends again...

..Hah. yeah right

You'd never talk to them again. Or anyone, For that matter.

Dave is all you need.

...And maybe you'll eventually be okay with that.

[veritable-trash]

Honey Rye

Pairing: Jack Whiskey Daniels x F!Reader(yeehawwwwww)

Words: 1.1k babeyyyyy

Warning: just a wittle smut, a sprinkle a dash, but all sweet and loving i know nothing else <333

A/N: HI OH MY GOD... so apologies for disappearing random friends who might be reading this i just was having a hard time. surprise i have a job that sometimes sucks butt and just general stress that sometimes sucks butt and i was just feeling very shitty about my writing and had no ideas and was like you are dumb why are you doing this throw it all away so i like sorta did that. and THEN! TODAY! i felt randomly inspired :)))) i still think this isn't really all that good but i threw up some words and put them into sentences and you know what??? that's good enough for me :))) i missed this shit, missed seeing nice people on this site and reading good things and enjoying this little craft that i'm trying to be consistent about. so i'm back with this i make no promises of more because god only knows what my brain will do. ok i shut up now please enjoy jack being my other comfort pedro obviously after my king javi(the og one don't y'all forget) love you my sweets hope everyone's week was a least just a little bit divine just for you ;)

(i understand this isn't jack BUT it like fits the vibe so just pretend it is ok???)

He was breathtaking.

Almost painfully so. All hard edges, gritty lines, features carved from marble that was probably secretly obsidian underneath. Eyes that singed you, wrapped you in a white knuckle grip of lust. Left you melted on the pavement as if it was peak August and you were some child's abandoned popsicle, but boy did you love being that popsicle.

Because it meant you could be like this. Both nude, skin to skin, his temple pressed to your sternum, you explaining how confusing it was that someone as beautiful, rugged, sexy as him would be gracing your bed. It was always said with a huf of a laugh, but the words were still digs into your softest parts.

And he knew all of that and yet he still wanted you. Feasted on your smile, your laugh. How your eyes glinted just shy of silver when he caught your stare across the room.

It made him want to crawl on his knees, across glass, through deserts. Worship at the altar of a goddess that graced his bed every night and made him yearn for forever and every single second of now.

The way you tucked your hair behind your ear left him breathless, tripping over his words, wishing he could enchant you with some spell so you would be his for eternity.

He didn't even need whiskey in his system to be belligerent. Your fingertips brushing against his palm, ghosting on the pulse pounding in his wrist got him there just as fast.

Jack was just like that when it came to you. Heart raw and beating, no longer on his sleeve but in a glass box that you kept on your bedside table. Like he needed you to know he was all yours, would always be yours. That he didn't need to protect his heart because if it wasn't with you it didn't matter.

How could anyone want to love you so openly, so freely? How could Agent Whiskey of all people be this unabashedly infatuated with some no name nobody?

He'd shut you up with a kiss and his fingers on your clit if he ever heard you say that out loud. Would make you try to say it again, but you never could. His touch made the crease between your brow melt, made you forget every fear and worry because every touch felt like it was clawing into your heart claiming it, staking himself deep within its chambers.

He could sense when the thoughts started to crawl in. Capture the light in your eyes and hide it from him. When they would convince you that things were too perfect. Too easy. That he was playing you for a fool and the Punk'd team would come out at any second to film tears streaming down your face as everyone laughed at you for believing a love like this was real.

His gaze would turn gentle then when he realized your mind was there. His fingers curling around your waist, his mustache tickling your neck, his breath ghosting on your pulse, so all you could smell was him and the bastard would whisper,

"I think you've driven me mad, Honeybee I don't know how else to explain the fact I can't breathe without thinking of you."

Your heart can barely handle it when he's like that. Reading you like a book written by him for him, you couldn't fool the author. It's like you two were written for each other. Written in the cosmos, in a novel, in some Sunday comic in a small town newspaper. It was all sickeningly kismet.

He was a disgusting sap and you wanted to suck him dry. Swallow down every honey rye drop of love he had within him. A never ending well with depths that were unknown to you but even to him.

His every word made you want to crawl under his skin until you were both one and the same and could never be parted. A level of obsession raced through both of your veins, screaming out to each other like somehow both of you would spontaneously implode into one.

Falling into each other was easy. Simple. So beautifully pure while being so disgustingly sinful there were almost no words left to describe the infatuation.

No words to describe how it felt when he sunk into you. How his teeth felt against your collarbone, the roll of his hips up into yours.

How beautiful his cock looked plunging in and out of your cunt. The slick glide of it felt almost like a painting. Something from the impressionist era. So many colors, constantly changing, a vibrancy you'd never been able to know in your life until you felt him bottoming out inside you. Marking you with a beauty that felt like it wasn't meant for this world.

It left gold edged clouds behind your eyelids. Sparks and shimmers running along your spine through to your fingertips. Crushing weight that tasted like salt, the tang of metal, the the sweetness of some summertime flower.

Maybe a honeysuckle. Maybe a bluebonnet.

The way his groans would vibrate into your heart, your core, shaking you like some earthquake Poseidon himself unleashed upon you both.

Fucking him was revolutionary, earth shattering, inexplicable and all consuming.

His whines of your name like something from a holy text. Something so sacred to your spirit it felt impossible to imagine your name said by anyone else.

He always came rumbling your name. Gritting it out into the space below your ear, teeth bared as if to bite but they only ever dragged. He didn't need to mark you when you were already his.

The stutter of his hips like some siren call to your cunt telling it to pull him deeper, deeper, deeper. Drag you both into the fluttering depths of your cunt, to where your souls now tangled and meshed.

There was a serenity to those moments after the all encompassing peak. He always took longer to settle as if he knows how much you enjoy those moments where you get to calm him.

Get to ground him into his body like he's always doing for you. Finally get to return the favor of pressing your affection into his body with your fingertips and mouth.

Reminding him that right here, right on your chest is a safe place to land. Is home.

[zannadu]

Now nobody asked for this but I’m going to do it anyway.

Includes: Katsuki Bakugou, Eijiro Kirishima, Denki Kaminari, Hanta Sero, and Mina Ashido

Warnings: fluff, mentions of sex, mentions of oral sex, kissing, and just dumb funny shit

MHA as Stoners

Katsuki Bakugou

It varies how fast he gets high, but his favorite way to smoke is with a simple joint

Okay this man will refuse to do any at first

But eventually will give in after the rest of the Bakusquad convinces him

(Though he will say “whatever I’ll do it”)

After the first smoke sesh with the squad he began to enjoy it more so he now does it more often.

If you are with him, he will either have a hard time being around her or will want to be next to you the whole time.

If you hold him he will act nonchalant but inside he will be exploding (no pun intended)

He will do his best to cuddle without making you uncomfortable.

He will get the munchies bad and insist you come with him to get more snacks every thirty minutes

He is much more open with his feelings and willing to talk more without yelling

He calms down a lot

He will show much more affection to you around people than he normally does.

Cuddling, kissing, squeezing, biting the whole PDA shabang.

He will not give two shits what everyone else thinks.

And when he finally has you alone, that’s when it gets a little hot and heavy. 👀

And he doesn’t even mean to.

Not that you’re complaining. ✌️

—————————————

Katsuki’s hands snaked their way around your waist and his face found a home in the crook of your neck.

“You know, if you want to cuddle, you could just say so,” you stated, resting your hand on his locked arms. He let out a soft groan against your skin. His breathing was slow and his eyes foggy. He squeezed you tighter and moved his hands to intertwine them with yours. His heavy eyes looked up and around the room meeting with everyone else’s eyes.

“You're touchy tonight,” Sero snickered, taking another hit off the joint that currently sat, squished in between his fingers.

Katsuki did nothing but roll his eyes and squeezed your fingers. He placed his mouth closer to your ear, his breath just tickling your ear lobe. Suddenly his teeth began to nibble on your ear, sending shivers down your arms, evident with the goosebumps now arise on your delicate skin.

“What do you say that we go to my room, I want you, ” his voice was low and husky. His fingers released from yours and fiddled the hem of your clothing and caressed your soft skin. His teeth began to but harder, causing you to gasp. He then continued to nibble slowly moving to your neck. How could you say no?

Eijiro Kirishima

It doesn't take very much to get him high so his favorite way to smoke is with a dab pen

Now usually this baby boy is sweet and manly

But when he's been smoking he gets VERY hungry

Like he will eat the entire kitchen.

He will space out a lot but will still listen to you if you're trying to talk to him

(or he will try to)

“Wait, what did you say?”

He isn't afraid of PDA either however he will wait till he's in private with you.

(as he should, he's respectful)

You might need to help him to his room

And try not to let him hug you until you're in bed because he will NOT let go until morning.

He is very sentimental and will give the BEST advice

“Babe, will you come to get food with me please🥺?”

“Kiri, you have a whole pint of ice cream, three bags of chips, AND meat buns. You don't need anything else😂”

He would pout omg.

He would fall asleep if you play with his hair in an instant

—————————————

Kirishima laid in your lap, and you picked up each piece of his hair and gently let it fall. He had showered and decided on no gel, therefore his hair is silky soft.

“Babe, why did you let me eat so much?” he groaned looking up at you. All you could do was laugh, being high just made everything funnier. He began to pout which ceased your laughter.

“I tried to stop you, but you wouldn't listen, ” you almost began to laugh again. He groaned and held his stomach.

“Next time, don't let me eat so much, ” he squeezed his eyes so much. You continued playing with his hair and smiled at the tired boy.

His eyes began to close and he looked up at you and soon he was out cold.

Denki Kaminari

His favorite way to smoke it with a pipe. Just makes him feel cool and the glass is trippy

Denki is usually very goofy and doesn't take things seriously, but when he's high he gets very philosophical

Like this man will talk about how space is so big and how a fish finds its way home.

Anything that will make you question your existence

He won't even realize what he's talking about until he looks at the rest of the group who is just starting wide-eyed and thinking about their whole existence on earth.

For some reason, he seems smarter than he lets people believe.

If he's with you he will be resting his head in your lap

He will have deep conversations sigh you

He will unknowingly rub small circles on your thighs while he's lost in thought💕

Continues to pick on Bakugou and how he's much different stoned

Usually wants alone time with you afterward, he feels safer when you sleep with him

He likes to be the little spoon

—————————————

Denki sat on the bed and leaned against the wall. His eyes studied the ceiling, his mouth slightly agape in a soft smile as he got even more lost in his thoughts. His eyes were almost entirely closed. The hushed murders from the other teens seemed to entirely disappear. The soft music that was also playing just took his mind further into the abyss.

“Hey do you guys think it's crazy that one muscle in your body is the reason you are alive, and if it just decides to quit one day you will just topple over and die?” Denki continued to stare up at the ceiling. The entire room went silent, the only noise was the light music.

“Dude what the fuck, ” sero looked at home from down on the floor. Denki shifted his head to look at the rest of the gang who were all just staring at him.

“What, I'm just saying, ” he shrugged his shoulders. You just looked at him and laughed. That was the most random thing to say and he probably would do it again soon.

“C’mon baby let's get you to bed, ” you grabbed his hand and went out of the room making sure to say goodnight to everyone. One thing was for sure, Denki could not WAIT to be cuddled.

Sero Hanta

This man's the og stoner and will hit a bong over everything else.

When Sero is stoned he makes sure everyone else is having fun

He makes sure everyone is comfortable with what they are doing

If someone doesn't know how to do something, like hit a bong, he will gladly show them

He is a weed mom

The best kind of mom honestly

If someone is paranoid or worried about an adult finding out or getting in trouble, he will try his darn hardest to calm them down

Has the necessities

Carries gum, eye drops, perfume or cologne on him at all times.

Has a pipe on him always

Provides the goods 🌿

Now let me tell you, this man gets HELLA horny when he's stoned

If everyone is settled in and comfortable he will turn his attention to you.

He doesn't even hide it.

“Mi amor, you look beautiful right now”

He will make you so flustered you will have to leave the room.

—————————————

“Sero, what are you doing?” you ask as me scoots over to you across the floor. You can't help but laugh. The cheesy grin on his face was everything at the moment. It seemed like you were the only two in the room.

“Just coming over to check on you, mi amor, ”he purred as he placed his finger under your chin to make you look into his eyes. His eyelids were heavy, the red tint covered by a foggy gloss, just made him that much hotter. He blinked slowly and began to inch closer to your lips.

“Sero, ” you breathed out right before gently placed his lips on yours, moving to pull your body impossibly closer to his. His lips worked over yours as you found your rhythm. He pulled away looking up at your eyes from your lips.

He leaned forward again, this time next to your ear so no one else could hear but you.

“I can't wait till everyone leaves so I can finally find out how good you taste.”

Mina Ashido

This girl's favorite way to smoke is a simple joint

She is great at rolling

(cuz she's good with her fingers if you know what I mean)

She is definitely in charge of the music and the vibes it puts off

But will also try and get everyone to go out and do stuff like getting food or to annoy Aizawa.

She also is the person laughing the most

She will laugh at literally anything

Kirishima making jokes about food or how hungry he is, Denki just acting dumb, or getting a rise outta Bakugou, whatever it is she will be laughing

This girl is part of the alphabet mafia and you can't change my mind🏳️‍🌈

Now she's is a cutie when it comes to relationships

She won't act inappropriately in front of everyone else out of respect for you

However, when she gets you alone that's a whole other story

—————————————

“C’mon y/n, let's go to my room. I have something to show you, ” Mina smirked at you and squeezed your hand in hers. You had no other choice to follow her as you were already headed out of Sero’s room and straight to her room. You didn't even get a chance to say goodbye to everyone.

You finally made it to her room and she closed the door behind you.

“What did you want to show me?” you asked sitting on her bed. You look around the very pink room and back to her standing in front of you. Mina looked you up and down and reached out to grab your cheeks gently with her hands. She leaned down and kissed you gently, working for her hands down to the hem of your shirt, eager to get it off. Her eyes glazed over and watched your every movement as you striped your clothes. Her fingers grazed over the sides of your arms and you went back in for a kiss. She pushed you farther back onto the bed, straddling her legs around your waist.

“This is going to be fun, ” she said breathlessly and pulled you in yet again for another lustful kiss.

Asks are open!!! This is my first official post on here, advice would be fantastic, or if you have any ideas that would be awesome! Thank you for reading😁❤️

[runephoenix6769]

Why Netflix aging up the Characters could spell disaster.

Ok, so I’ve tried to find confirmation that this is true and kinda found bubkiss so far.  But.... Zuko being aged up by two years does not bode well his motivation or Azula (or Sokka for that matter), narratively speaking and will massively change how their stories/character arcs hit.  It’s my belief that by aging up the characters they’ll kinda lose some of the soul of the show AND the poignancy of just how much pressure has been laid on the shoulders of Gaang and Azula's trio. The nuance of Children fixing a world broken by adults. (I shall preface by saying that anyone under 18 is a child and therefore even joining the military at 16 is still awful, but this post is being written within the context of the avatar universe, its societal norms and customs.)

Hear me out.  Within the show, all the main cast of children are supposed to be outliers and exceptionally skilled, even surpassing many of the adults in that world in terms of mastery of their elements and ability to execute strategy.   At 16/17 Rangi had her first commission after graduating from the Junior Corps in record time, to eventually become one of the youngest Lieutenants in Fire Nation Army service, during peace time.  400 years later we are in the midst of a global war, meaning the goal posts within the various societies would have shifted considerably. (Apart from the Earth Kingdom, they seriously need to get with the times.) Zuko is the heir to the throne of an imperial expansionist country, where military service is expected of many of the aristocracy. (If not every citizen doing something towards the war effort.) And has been since the reign of Sozin.  Being the heir, he would naturally be expected to take a military commission at 16/17, as precedent has been shown to us via Rangi. This would serve to foster loyalty from his soldiers, train him in ways of command to prepare him for taking over the Nation, etc etc.  Lets say that Netflix keep the rest of his story the same, so he is still ousted at 13 sent on a mission of folly as a cruel punishment. Well that just casts his 4 years at sea and his behaviour towards his men in an awful light. In four years he has not learned regard for the safety of his men? It makes the treatment of his men look callous instead of being a child who doesn't quite grasp how much his crew do for him, that they too have been ousted and separated from their loved ones! Four years of shite treatment would surely land a mutiny on his hands?  If anything, it serves to make him look whiny, and incompetently oblivious to the needs of others.  And what does it mean if they move the timeline of the Agni Kai up by two years, to 15?  It doesn't have quite the same impact. Remember what sits at the core of this show. It is ultimately about children trying the fix the world that the adults broke, violence, cruelty, child soldiers and the effects of war upon them, under intense pressure to succeed.  Zuko is supposed to be a child who hasn’t even begun to figure out what he wants.   His character arc in the show is supposed to be that journey!

Which brings me to Azula!  A child prodigy, who took down Ba Sing Se in a relatively bloodless coup at 14! Its meant to be an awe inspiring Herculean feat! A top notch military strategist, she is meant to be unmatched by any of her peers.  Her age in the OG show certainly explains her behavior, her not being developed enough in many ways. This contributes towards the deterioration of her mental health when she cannot reconcile the heavily cultivated sense of self with the reality culminating in the tragic and heart wrenching mental breakdown at 14! At 16/17, it makes it look like a huge ass hissy fit! OG Azula’s inflection moment begins in The Beach episode. She is begins to ask questions of herself in the form of small experiments. It takes the form of her hiding their identities on Ember Island.  It is as if she is trying to feel out if she is as witty and charming as she believes, but she comes to learn that she is woefully socially inept, people don’t like her for her, beginning the spiral of insecurity and self doubt. We are also told that Azula’s mother thought her a monster and she is massively hurt by that, though she plays it off as nothing.  This insecurity is blown wide open on the Boiling Rock cemented by Ty Lee’s betrayal and culminates in Azula, who is truly terrified that he might burn her in a way similar to Zuko, seeing her being sidelined by Ozai.  She takes as a form of punishment for her ‘failure’, a form of banishment, that she has been discarded like Zuko, when she had imagined being by her father’s side as they burned the world in celebration of their mutual victory rather than for what is truly is which is Ozai being a glory hog and reaping all the benefits from Azula’s hard work.  Which brings me to the suggestion by Azula to burn the world in the first place. A child suggesting that you ‘Burn the World’ smacks a whole lot differently when you think of it as a kid not quite grasping/understanding the ramifications of such a suggestion, but a 16 year old? Such a thing tips her from confused mentally unwell child with a crippling fear of failure raised without a lick of compassion to full blown villainy with nothing remotely sympathetic about her! The way the last Agni Kai is framed you are supposed to feel sympathetic towards her! Which makes me wonder if they are gonna paint Azula as unhinged straight from the get go? Her unravelling at the seams is supposed to be her journey!

Sokka.... at 17!  In the OG show, Hakoda does the right thing by telling Sokka to remain behind to look after the village because at 13 he is too young to go to war.  Why leave him behind at 15? Would that not serve to feed into feelings of inadequacy, that he was deemed too weak to leave and fight with the other men and boys of the tribe?  Now, I would argue that Sokka’s OG arc rivals Zuko’s redemption. He does feel inadequate and overcomes it. He also unlearns a shit load of misogyny! What 17 year old doesn’t take responsibility for his own clothes, in a tribe were adults are few and far between? What 17 year old expects his little sister to be his mother and bear the brunt of the domestic? How obtuse and unfeeling would that make Sokka? It would propel him to the side of boorish, lazy and entitled rather than the sweet teenage boy who grows to realise he has a lot to learn.  OG Sokka is humble as hell and not afraid admit when he is lacking! He will go and openly admit his flaws and learn from others who he had previously written off.  Suki gives him a glass of respect women juice and he keeps on chugging, only adding to the Sokka we know and love.  This is supposed to be his journey! 

OG Sokka is just as much of a genius as Azula!  They are both supposed to be exceptional. Having them sit at 16/17 figuring this all out within a war torn world were it would be totally normal for them to participate in the generational war machine kind of robs them of this. Their more child like behaviours, grappling with concepts and truly understanding their consequences is supposed to remind us that they are children, being asked to do something no child ever should! Aging them up casts these things in a whole other light, skewering the what makes this show so beloved!  If you change the core characters to the point their journey’s don’t make sense within the world they inhabit, or they become unrecognisable to the audience you’re trying to milk then really.....what’s the point?  

[saikolikes]

In this episode of “using Tumblr to meta in a space where I don’t have to screenshot iPhone notes to use more than 300 characters at a time” — a comparison between og P5 and Royal ending scenes!

All was born from this account, this thread, and this pic.

The gist of it is: I highly prefer vanilla p5 pre-and post credit scenes over royal ones. Here’s why.

A comparison between Persona 5 and Persona 5 Royal ending scenes

I will primarily talk about the animated cutscenes that play right before and after the end credits. But since they are tied to the games’ general narrative, I will stretch the topic a bit more to make my point.

OG P5

The ending is simple, but effective. It reflects vanilla in the sense that it’s very light and naïve, focuses a lot on the group, and gives a very positive outlook on the game’s themes with a particular attention to the one of freedom. The thieves state that now they are “free to do what they want”, and the air of freedom is further reinforced by the very final shot of Joker looking at the camera with his face completely free, no glasses or hair to cover him up.

The story closed in a bright and cheerful way, and after the melancholy of With the stars and us (which is a mirror of the bond the thieves created and how they will be always connected even when apart), that sequence + Wake up get up get out there serve to lighten the mood.

P5 ROYAL

Royal’s ending sequence is based off of og p5 one, but introduces a lot of new elements – as the game itself often does. Where vanilla ending serve to neatly close the story, Royal’s does the opposite by re-opening matters that the player thought were closed: Akechi’s (not) death and Joker’s reflection in the mirror (which arguably can also be interpreted as Joker being forever a part of Akiren, regardless of the Metaverse).

This ending also follows its game’s narrative, in the sense that it shifts the focus from the group as a whole (the thieves) to “blocks” of individuals: Joker + the thieves, Joker + Maruki, Joker + Sumire, and Joker + Akechi. Which is also a thing that Royal often does.

This ending is surely more bittersweet that og p5’s true ending, as the impression the player gets is that the story didn’t fully end, and there’s still more to it, but we can’t have it now, nor we are sure we’ll have it in the future.

WHY I THINK OG ENDING WORKS BETTER

It’s not a matter of intentions, rather it’s a matter of structure. Royal’s ending is very chaotic, doesn’t really focus on anything or anyone, and doesn’t serve as a reinforcement of the game’s more mature themes (third sem is a lot better at that, but I’ll get to it later). The impression is that they added the new content because it ought to be added, and left the ending open for whatever reason. I don’t believe in a Royal direct sequel so it’s a mystery why Atlus chose to do that, as they also didn’t strictly link Royal to Strikers (you can fight me on this one) but I’ll gladly be proven wrong!

My point is: it’s true that the final part and overall message of Royal are more complex and mature. But sadly, I don’t think the ending sequence reflects that. If anything, I think it reflects Royal’s tendency of sticking new bits to an already existing story without questioning too much if they will make sense or not. Sometimes they work, some others, they don’t. And that’s the case.

(Had this stopped me from screaming in seeing Akechi walking past Joker on that bench? Absolutely not!)

P5 AND ROYAL LAST MONTH AND OVERALL NARRATIVE COMPARISON

As I was saying, I do think Royal gave a more mature twist to P5 narrative. I don’t necessarily want to say it improved it, since I think in the end, it’s a very personal consideration.

P5 was all about freedom and making bonds that truly matter to help you overcome the chains of society. It’s a very shonen approach, very teenage-y, one that is naturally full of good sentiments and strives to give the players a 90% positive outlook in the end.

Royal isn’t like that. Its power lays not quite in the fact that what Maruki is doing is right vs wrong; it’s rather powerful because it forces you to reflect on the value of pain, of erasing the past, of facing pain as an inherent element of human life, something no one can fully control. Royal is about free will. Is about healing. And for delivering this message, it needs to disband the very foundation of the game: the thieves as an entity.

Where P5 as a game tends to set aside individual thieves to favour group dynamics and development, Royal re-frames the bond the group forged and recognises that sometimes, in order to grow, you have to part with what you know and branch out towards new horizons. All while caring about and remaining friends with the very people that made this realisation possible!

I find it truly beautiful and a huge step up in the narrative, alongside with the whole third semester and Maruki’s villain arc.

But sadly, I don’t find this complexity, this beauty, in the ending sequence of Royal. It doesn’t speak the same language as the portion of the game that came immediately before it – if not for one thing. Which is refusing to give Sumire and Goro a proper closure. But this is for another thread.

(Addendum: one thing that Royal absolutely nails, though, is the bad ending. That shit rocks.)

[hunterartemis]

Media Bias (Avengers X Alien!Reader)

It was a request from anonymous reader and since I have limited experience with tagging, I am going to quote the person’s request here:

“ Hi can you please do Avengers x reader where the reader is like Starfire from og teen titans (but the reader is green and the blasts are blue) and the Avengers go on a talk show and the host is being very mean to her. Thanks”

So, dear anonymous. I hope you enjoy!“

Words: a whopping 4100

Y/n, open the door” I heard Sam thudding away on my door as I buried myself in the layers of blanket and put the air condition humid enough to cause a mini monsoon.

“Go away Wilson and leave me alone--” I bellowed on top of my voice.

“Y/n it’s been more than 7 hrs, you got to come out... whatever happened in the morning you gotta let it go--”

“I don’t wanna let it go... I am a national embarrassment--”

You must be thinking, what is the situation you’ve been dragged into. Let me pause there and rewind 17 hours back to give you a complete understanding which lead to this complete mess.

People think our story ended and sealed with Thanos never got to see what we go through in the New York penthouse. With the ongoing Pandemic on board, people are desperate to see us even more, as if it is the new Thanos and we are to defeat it. There is no greater sense of helplessness than playing the puppet of courage without doing anything. So whoever wrote that “after the defeat of big bad, the heroes rejoice” was a big idiot.

And thus, I found myself awake after hours, sitting alongside the broad glass panel that showed the completely stopped-in-time, shining in the dark cityscape of once bustling New York. A fleeting sense of desolation plagued me as I remember my own world in the verge of extinction. My breath almost stopped in the great worry of my fellow living being in this planet; the one who saved me from destitution--

 “y/n, is that you?”A calm and concerned paternal voice broke the train of my thought. I sharply looked behind my shoulder to see a disheveled figure of man standing in the dark. By the tousled curls and the slouched hem of the sweatpants, I knew was Bruce.

“Urh, you startled me!” I said with a dismissive voice. I felt almost embarrassed to realize what I was thinking moments ago. I took a deep breath and tried to compose myself.

“It’s you who startled me y/n, what are you doing up so late?” Bruce said with a groggy voice rubbing his eyes rather irritatingly. “We have an important event to attend tomorrow first thing in the morning” he slowly moved towards from the shadowy part of the room to the path of dimmed light from the glass panel and spared a long glance at my face. The way he looked at me sometimes irritated me, because it was an inalienable fact that he fell into the same category of humans who express an unhealthy obsession with my kind: a scientist.

“It’s not like I enjoy staying up like you Lowly Human...I am as stressed for tomorrow as you are!” I tore my face from his ken to express my displeasure. In reply, he sighed disappointedly, which sounded patronizing in my already agitated mind.

“I wish you’d stop insulting my specie whenever you get upset...” he gently put his hand in my shoulder, but soon he withdrew and stepped back. “And what is that god-awful smell?”

Any female whether she is human or not is very sensitive to criticism, especially about how she appears, thus Bruce’s comment was not only offensive but hurtful as well. I could not restrain my anger and annoyance anymore, and I stood up sharply to face him “I just happen to wet myself in the rain yesterday at my detour downtown and it turns out it has too much sulphuric acid and it is peeling my skin away... right before when I am about to go up close on television.”  My hand subconsciously moved up to my cheek, where flakes were forming in my otherwise jade smooth skin. “And you are telling me to stop insulting your specie... I will when you unicellular cretins will stop ruining your own environment—“ I folded my arms defensively, gazing away from Bruce’s face “--as if I don’t get ridiculed enough for my chrorophyllic skintone, and now I am shedding like a common reptile.”

“Alright alright I am sorry...” Bruce threw up his arms defensively, and his small paces back and forth showed his discomfort more than anything, “do you want something for your skin, CeraVe or something? I can fetch you some ice if you want?”

His apologetic gesture made my whole effort defeated; but my pride disrupted me from being apologetic “Forget it... as if those human manures would work on my skin—“ I heaved a sigh and looked at him again “must we do the thing? I mean I am not the only alien that set foot on earth in this decade, why must I be walked around like a showdog in front of all the people?”

For some moments Bruce did not answer me. I almost thought he was ignoring me, but then I realised that he must be contemplating on every word he wanted to say and every word that was running through his brilliant mind. Out of anyone in the team, Bruce was the visual hole, the less than heroic material: even with the Hulk. And for this, the society made sure that he would be self conscious for the rest of his life for his other identity. My annoyance almost melted to sympathy when I heard him speak in a rather frustrated voice.

“Y/N, I know that you are stressed about this and frankly I hate this stuff too, but this is very important for the people: for your people as well as ours. Not all things that come from the space are benign and people need reassurance that you are not hostile. I hate this too, but it is for the greater good!”

“Greater good, greater good... it is always for the greater good!”  The same old daily whining of lofty agenda made me sick “I am sick and tired of these Brucie, I don’t want to do this anymore... I am tired about people asking me weird questions and cretins posing as scientists trying to push probes on me the first chances they get-- I wish I could just disappear with the portal that brought me in this cursed place!“

Bruce came closer and grabbed my shoulders gently “Don’t say that y/n... otherwise we wouldn’t have the means to counterattack all those aliens—“ my silence might have given him the cue that he wasn’t doing a very good job at convincing. His wavering eyes fixed on my face once again as he spoke “okay, here is a deal: how about it is the last time you appear in public, hm? Once you satisfy them that you are part of the team, I swear people will leave you alone... they left the Hulk alone too once they understood that he is one of the good guys!”

“No but...“

“No ifs and buts... go, and have some sleep. Let me look in the lab if we have some squalanes and peptide solutions lying around—“ he said with a paternal affection and disappeared into the dark passage which lead to his room

“Thanks Brucie you are the best—“

I couldn’t help but to smile a little. Humans!

...

“This is a bad idea I am telling you--“ I told Bruce with an hushed tone as the makeup artist went on with a puff on my face for the millionth times. The rest of my team was behind me, getting the same attentions to their dismay. I could tell Bucky was downright uncomfortable as his makeup artist had a hard time getting not distracted by his bionic arm; and Wanda was downright glaring at the man who kept flicking the brush on her nose.

“relax y/n, you are smart and you are friendly, you are going to ace this and trust me people are going to love you--“ Bruce said with gritted teeth to make sure no one could tell what he was saying. He almost flinched as some of the powder made into his nose and the makeup artist followed him up with a q-tip.

“My face is itchy...“ I whispered again, trying not to gouge my face out with my nails as the powder sat on the flaky part of the cheek. If this wasn’t a studio I would have scratched my face like a lunatic and ended up as someone who was attacked by a bear in the mountains. And I was glad that I was standing beside Bruce who knew how not to go overboard with the things. Clint would have brushed them off, Wanda and Bucky would have panicked, and Sam’s gestures no matter how genuine would have made me laugh.

“Wanda already told the makeup artist to spray you with Squalane, your face isn’t half as bad as it were yesterday night“ Bruce then went on politely gesturing the makeup artist to spray the stuff Bruce brought from the lab in a clear bottle, and the look on the Makeup Artist’s face was between annoyance and bursting into tears.

“Brucie...“ “I don’t wanna mess it up--“ I said nervously as we walked into the couch and settled with the others.

“Trust me you won’t... “ Bruce graciously consoled me.

The cameraman cued and we were all gestured to look into the main camera as the lights in front of us adjusted accordingly. Within all hustle and bustle, the host walked in like a royalty, and by the looks of his face and those following him with makeup and refreshment, he had a really bad morning.

“We will go on air in 3, 2 and 1”

“Good Morning America, this is your host Justin Fallon and welcome to another episode of The Early Show. Today we have with us some really special guests. You might know them from News, the murals, the comics and the Merchs please welcome our own global superheroes: The Avengers. Welcome to our show” the host said with an uncomfortable friendliness and turned towards us.

"Thanks for having us with you" Sam answered graciously, with a little awkwardness. I could understand why; it was always Tony, Steve and Natasha who spoke in public. After such a terrible loss, he is struggling to fill up their shoes for the sake of our public image. He had been wrapped up into a pretty bad controversy recently for succeeding as Captain America and it had a pretty bad toll on him—to the point his speech kind of went from cheerful to composed in an unnatural way.

 "It’s been way too long since our morning couch looked so colorful and it surely brightens up the day.” The host said with an obligatory politeness. Although the term was innocent enough but it seemed not so—I instantly froze up and million things started flying inside my head: was I looking good enough, is my patches showing under the layers of power and squalane. Turns out it was not me alone. From the corner of my eye I could sense the tension behind me from Clint and Bucky and I know it was different than mine. The host must have wanted the old team, and looked like he was stuck with the mediocre leftovers.

“Thank you...“ Sam replied.

“So here you guys are after averting the big wipeout crisis, in the quiet and chilling, so how does it feel to be in the pensive from being hyperactive all the time?“

“Well, at first it did feel kind of boring and lack luster, but slowly we are adjusting to it. With the ongoing Pandemic crisis I think we just have to adjust to the situation. In a way, I think we are all helping each other by staying inside and recuperating.” Sam answered diplomatically.

“That’s so nice” the interviewer said quite curtly and then changing the topic he sharply turned to Doctor Banner “I know of all you people Dr. Banner will find this Lockdown Leisure slightly more comforting, isn’t that so Doctor Banner?”

Wait, what was that? Was that even normal? Sam was sitting in the front and after him Bucky, then Wanda and then Bruce. Should not he come gradually? Breathe... maybe I am reading too much into this. Keep a friendly face, don’t think too much... the entire nation is watching... this is the one time I have to do things right! It’s for me, my team who housed me and my people.

I had to give props to Bruce for managing things calmly despite his claims about public speaking. He politely replied “Well theoretically it should be but it’s not like causes of anger cannot exist within the so called peaceful environment if you think about it, but I am glad you showed your concern” and like a pro, reached out to the glass in front of him to sip some water—like some real celebs in talk shows.

“Isn’t that true! So Solaris, how does it feel to be surrounded by the icons of the earth?”

I wasn’t really ready for the sudden attention. For a second I blanked out completely and gaped my mouth like a complete idiot. My stupefied face must have been quite prominent because the host tried to laugh it off lightly to divert the attention. I am still wrapping my head around the fact how some humans work so beautifully under so much attention—If I could choose between blasting off alien armies and speaking in talk shows, I will take the aliens instead.

“I..I--It’s quite fun... there is never a dull moment with them--“ I manage to utter, and thankfully it wasn’t a gurgling sound from a deep abyss.

“The thing is, being the most newest member, you sort of have a mystery around you, the kind of a Blue Comet sort--“

“Oh thank you— “ great going me, like a real talk show celeb—keep it up!

“So why don’t we break that down... Solaris, is that true that you came from a whole another galaxy which is not Milky Way?” the Talk show host asked, reading from a small piece of card.

Finally, something I can talk about all day: stars, planets and galaxy. I will have to slay this, I chanted inside and replied after drawing a breath “Yes that’s true. I am from Planet Auriga from Pleiades system. Our Sun is Alcyone, the second brightest star right after Aldebaran. You people call our system Taurus Constellation--” 

“--so much astrophysics, take notes kids they might ask you at the NASA interview.“ the talk show host interrupted. It annoyed me greatly because I could finish the words I worked so hard to speak confidently. So that’s how Bruce must feel all the time when people interrupted him when he explains things. However the host went on as if nothing happened “For a near human creature in this planet, do you identify more with the Professor X’s troop or with the Avengers?”

Near human creature? My race is literally the most Superior in all of galaxy.

“I don’t really understand what you mean...” I said as politely as I could manage.

“I mean isn’t it hard to fit in when you are the only alien in the group--“

The flippant remark was rude and I tried not to wrap my head around it. I recalled Bruce’s words to keep cool and maintain a neutral face replied : “I mean I am not the only one, Thor is also not of the earth and he is a darling to be around. Alien or not I think I have learned a lot about myself and the ways of earth by spending time with this wonderful people?“

I could hear the audience clapping and cheering with my reply. A surge of pride swept across my chest and I smiled slightly at the audience.

“How sweet--“ the host said, keeping with the cheerful mood “as the outer world people are coming into the planets, we think a lot of things are shifting, do you find it hard to cope into the earth from where you come from--“

Finally, a thoughtful question, I made a solid eye contact with the host and replied “No, the atmosphere is pretty much the same in Auriga, but I think humans can do a lot better taking care of the environment. I know for a fact that millions of planets and their lifeforms were extinct because of excesses I see on earth.”

The thoughtfulness of the host was only for so long “The girl’s been around... if you know what I mean—“ he commented with a little wink, and from the audience’s laugh I knew he didn’t mean something polite or mildly positive. After the laughter subsided, he turned again to me “I dig the midnight blue hair... it is so contradictory and yet it works“ he complimented “because you know scale and hair are not something we see very often in our planet--“ 

Excuse me, what was that supposed to mean?

“--so tell me are the lapis cascades all natural? I mean they are not dyed at all?”

“No they are not... the special keratin bond that reflect the blue pigment of the natural light but they are actually transparent—“ I added objectively.

“So that means in the right lighting you don’t need to mow the bush—“ the host said with a curved smile on his lips, and the audience went on laughing in the same manner they did moments ago.

Even under the blowing airconditioner, I started t feel really warm around my neck “I really don’t know what you mean; you are making any sense at all! Do you guys need special light to mow the bush, do you do in the solstices or during the eclipses—“  this time I didn’t hide the fact that I was annoyed.

“--she is really really funny you guys--“ the host again smiled and acted like I was a stone wall and my reaction didn’t register in his mind at all. “So you are saying you don’t mow your bush at all?“

“I live in a New York Penthouse, there is no bush--“ honestly if this wasn’t a dumb talk show, I would have taught this impudent human a lesson.

The host looked a little uncomfortable as our eye contact lasted for several seconds. He cleared his throat and went on “Okay you guys, she just clarified that there is no bush, so let’s move on to your...your look... I am so fascinated by it, it’s so reptile chic--“

What’s your fascination with cold blooded animals? Are you asking to die like one?

“Um, thanks...?!”

“So how do you manage to maintain this--“

That was honestly the last straw. This host is impolite and rude and he leeches off the discomfort of his talk show host. When this realisation hit, all my self-control and self preservation went out of the window. The vacuum was replaced by the sheer annoyance towards the host who deliberately mistreated us since the beginning.

“Do you think that’s how I live, maintaining my skin and mowing the bush--“ my pitch rose from my previous composed tone “I mean what kind of questions are these?“

The host was still wearing his phony smile on his face, but I could see the colour slightly draining off his face “No I was just asking, because the audience wants to know--“

“I think the audience is smart enough to understand that they cannot get the green skin on natural blue hair, so can you move on to a more sensible question?“ I answered heatedly and defensively at the same time, and as I spoke I felt the aura of tension shifting from discomfort to sheer panic.

“Y/n... don’t do this--” I heard Bucky whisper very faintly from above.

“Solaris, don’t get me wrong, but we don’t always get a green-skin hottie on the morning couch, don’t be offended!” he said while he gestured covertly to cut the camera on the other side. I have to give this man an applause , I could tell he had busted all his courage but he kept the face of nonchalance too good to be true—no wonder he sat on this chair for so long.

“What’s your obsession with the skin colour?—“ I said heatedly as I stood up from my seat “Don’t you dare cut the camera... don’t you dare! Do you think you humans are the epitome of beauty from which point everyone in the galaxy should confirm? I am sick of this... Everyone, I am so sorry for your wasted time but no more of this!”

“Solaris--“ this time it was Sam’s voice that implored me from the sides. For a split second I felt bad for him, because as Captain America, he would have to take the heat from the public. But I was at the point of no return. If I back out now, I would be called a pushover and I would have to endure that image for the rest of my life in the earth.

“You know what, as you are so obsessed with my looks, I would love to show you another thing of mine that is blue--”

Blast

So long story short, Solaris goes to a morning talk show, Solaris encounters a rude host and Solaris blasts him with her Blue Sun Beam. Biggest disaster ever!

The thudding outside the door would not stop, and honestly their over attention was getting on my nerves “honestly, why don’t you go away... what are you, my royal nanny?”

“Very funny Solaris... now come out and get some food--” this time it was Bucky who spoke. Although he was the shortest to reply, but it made me well up. He had the shittiest history amongst all of us: hunted, betrayed, manipulated and now sidelined—how can I see my problems bigger than him.

 “How can I... I ruined everything, all the reputation you built throughout the year, I blew it up within 3 minutes, how can I show my face to you guys! I was supposed to be the superior being--“

A moment of silence followed. But then the old familiar calm voice spoke from the other side

“y/n... It’s not about superior or inferior, you were just very very honest with your feeling! sometimes it’s good for the public, sometimes it is not. I mean look at me--I have struggling with my anger all my life and god knows the stuff I have wrecked in Hulk state. It’s okay to make a mistake... no one blames you!”

“Ha ha right...“ I replied sarcastically, feeling mad about how well Bruce understood my situation.

“Honestly, the way you acted today... Tony would have been proud!”

I could not hold myself anymore. All the feeling that has been plaguing me until now: embarrassment, guilt, confusion, sadness... all came down like a thundering rain with that one statement. I rushed and slammed the door open and jumped on Bruce to embrace him into a tight hug. At first I could tell Bruce was taken aback, but soon his firm arms snaked under my back to hold me tightly.

“I am so sorry... I ruined you all--“ I hid my face in Bruce’s shoulder. Suddenly I felt a gentle pat on my back, I straightened up and looked, it was Sam. His awkward cautionary expression was gone and he looked cherry as the old days “As Captain America, I cannot condone your behaviour, but as Sam... well, that jerk deserved it--“ he reached for his pocket and took out his cellphone “and hundred thousand people in New York agree with you“

I looked at him with a curious expression as he gave me his phone. When I looked at it, it was a tabloid video that had the clip of me blasting the host and it had—

“Stars in galaxies!... 100K likes?” I exclaimed

“And look down, there are comments too--” Bucky scrolled down from behind my shoulder to descend to the white space.

That jerk deserves it, he was literally harassing her...You go Solaris #MeToo

Solaris is so cool, I wish I was as cool as her.

Ugh, I hate that morning show host, if I was in her place I would have thrown him off the stark tower, #SunQueen

Racists never change, and We stan our color positive hero #SolarisRocks

Humans...

...

Okay, that took a lot of time because at first I didn’t know how to work on the request, then I had to go back and forth and rewrite most of it two times because I wasn’t convinced it was good. So I sincerely hope it’s good because I am freaked out as hell.

I also gave reader a name because she is inspired by an alien character in TeenTitans called “Starfire”. So I call her Solaris, and was constantly reminded of Solar of Mamamoo (TMI)

I don’t hate on Fallon, I just used his name because it is recognisable by American public and I also had to see a lot of Jimmy Fallon’s show to write about the Talk Show plot. I was also greatly inspired by Naomi Campbell, RDJ and Nicki Minaj’s interviews.

[vampiresuns]

🍋 Good Boys In Red

✴︎ GOOD BOYS IN RED ✴︎

3.4 words. In which it’s Julian job to be a good boy, and Anatole’s to show him how to.

CWs: Dom/sub dynamics, impact play, masturbation instruction, penetrative sex, oral sex, light manhandling, and brief height difference mentions.

Before you read! This fic also includes explicit descriptions of a transmasculine person’s genitalia. If you are trasnmasculine and that kind of mentions may be squicky to you, proceed as you see more fit.

If you’re not, treat the subject with the appropriate respect.

Minors DNI — 🍋🍋🍋 content ahead.

You can find the og harness which inspired Julian’s in this piece here.

The harness was made of red leather with golden bucks and rings. It had a strap that looped behind his neck and into a hogtie, where three other straps began. One went down the middle of his chest, the other two over his chest, into its sides and behind his back.

The former joined two leather straps that went over the underside of his chest. Two adjustable straps went down in a V shape framing his cock — they connected to the straps under his chest, and to another which went through his back. The rings which connected those also had two chains, one per side, connecting to two thigh belts. The strap behind his back had another golden ring, which connected to the V-shaped straps framing his cock, now going up his ass like a thong.

The cuffs around his wrists could be locked at any level where a connecting ring was found. Right now, they were tied with a double fixation to the rings over his ribs.

When he put it on after Anatole told him to step into something pretty for him, he had indeed felt pretty. He wanted to look so, too. Julian wanted to look so pretty for Anatole that he’d do anything he wanted with him. He wanted to be a pretty thing he could fuck and serve himself with and by the look Nana had given him when he stepped out he had done good. 

He loved being Anatole’s good boy too. 

Now, with his hands cuffed and tied, his face down against the mattress and his ass up in the air he didn’t just feel pretty, he felt exposed. He had one of his cheeks against the bed, following Anatole’s movements with his eyes. He was wearing a pair of black, high waisted thongs with a high cut and a lace trim that made Julian want to bury his face between Anatole’s thighs and be smothered there for evermore.

But Anatole wasn’t paying attention to him yet, or not overtly. He was weighing a crop, slapping the heart-shaped tip softly against his own hand. Julian wanted a lot of things, like being touched, or fucked, or used, but the gentle thwap of the crop and Anatole’s eyes on him were making him go a little crazy.

He’d settle for anything, he’d do anything. 

“Let’s see if you can stand up to ten, sweetheart,” God, Julian loved that tone, the cocky, honeyed nonchalance only Anatole would be able to make work so well, “I want you counting. If you fail to count, I’ll repeat the hit until you do. Got it?”

“Yes, sir.”

Anatole smiled at him, like he could devour him. Like he would devour him, but not before playing with him until he begged for the small mercy of death.

“Good boy.”

Julian swallowed, a shudder going down his spine as Anatole teased him by caressing his thighs with the tip of the crop. He whimpered as the tip went softly over his balls. Anatole smiled again before retreating the crop and—

Smack. Julian gasped with the first impact. He should’ve seen it coming.

“One.”

Nana did it again. “Two—”

The crop in question was new, something they both had been wanting to try out for a while now, but hadn’t had the time to do it. Now here they were, Julian once again forgetting Anatole was good at swinging things. If he wasn’t already lost in the sting of it, the condensed heat over his skin when the crop met his butt cheek and the jolt of pleasure that came with it, he’d mention to Nana how he wasn’t expecting parry-riposte rapier swings to be a transferable skill.

He could make a mental note to ask him afterwards, but he had just called swing number five and thinking was nearly impossible. It’d have to wait. 

He barely made it to ten. Julian was torn between not saying it, wanting to feel the crop against his skin one more time, and begging to be fucked already, his hard cock bobbing softly against him as he swayed in place after feeling the tenth swat, the pain being almost too big (in the best of ways) to stay still. 

Calling out the number won. 

He allowed himself to go a little limp, or as limp as possible considering both the attire and his position as Anatole called him a good boy. His ass was full of heart shaped crop marks, all in different stages of fading away.

He kneeled over him to kiss his back, his hands ghosting over his stomach, his fingers brushing against his happy trail. Julian’s cock twitched. 

“Sir, please touch me. Please fuck me. I have been good. I want to be your slut— please.” 

Anatole kneeled back and got out of the bed. “No,” he said, nonchalant as could be. 

“Please, sir.” 

With one hand on the crook of his arm and the other in a fist around Julian’s hair, Anatole pulled him back, making him sit on his heels. Julian moaned with the hair tug, and while he softened his fist, he pulled his head further back, so he could kiss his neck while he undid the restraints attaching the cuffs to the harness. 

“No, sweetheart. You’re cute when you beg, but if you stopped being an overeager little slut for a moment and let me talk—“ Julian nodded, Anatole kissed and nipped at the hollow of his throat. “That’s a good boy. Don’t worry, sweetheart, I know you can’t help being my overeager little slut, which is why I’m here, to channel all of that into something useful, hm? You like being used, don’t you, Ilya, sweetheart?” 

“I love when you use me, sir.” 

“Are we green?” 

“Yes, sir.” 

“Then you won’t mind preparing yourself for me, would you?” 

“But— but.” 

“Is my sweetheart being ungrateful?” 

Anatole’s warning tone was nothing like the nonchalant sweetness he used to instruct him around. It had more teeth, it was a materialised warming. It made Julian scramble to his knees to prove himself, anticipating the tortuously long consideration his partner would give him before assessing him in any way. “No, no, I could never, I just wanted you to touch me, please.” 

“But that isn’t giving you something to do, is it? I do love pampering you, but you’ll have to wait a little longer, sweetheart. Can you do that, or shall we call it a night?” 

“No! No, I’ll be good.” 

“Yes, I believe you will. Finger yourself for me. I want you stretched properly, so you can take all my cock with ease, is that clear?” 

“Yes, sir.” 

“No touching yourself, I was your hands in your ass, not on your dick.” 

“Yes, sir.”

“And go slowly. I didn’t get to enjoy any of the wine I poured when we were just talking, and I would like to have a nice show to watch while I do enjoy it now.” 

“Yes, sir.”

“Good boy. Keep being this good for me, sweetheart, and you’ll get exactly what you want.”

Julian could do that. He could be good. As Anatole took a seat on his armchair, legs swung over the armrest, Julian reached for the lube and slicked his fingers under his partner’s gaze. Anatole’s eyes never left him, not even when he took idle, small sips of wine.

They had been sharing a glass before they began having sex, but Anatole spent most of his time then rubbing Julian’s shoulders as they made conversation. Now he got to taste the wine while he instructed Julian on how many fingers and how to move them, watching raptly as minutes passed and one turned to two, and two to three. 

Julian’s cheeks were flushed, his lips parted as he moaned; though he wasn’t being loud, he held back no sound, no pant, no half cry that ended with a hiss as he bit his lower lip, pushing his fingers a little higher.

He was a sight for sore eyes, and Anatole told him. So pretty with his long lines, and the harness framing him, so pretty with half lidded eyes and fluttering eyelashes. Julian looked debauched, pleasure etched on his face, faint bite marks on the base of his neck, his cock bobbing as he fingered himself — or perhaps it was how his ass was still sensitive from all the smacks of the crop and he had to sit on it. 

Gods, Anatole loved him like this. 

But Julian couldn’t finger himself forever, as tempting as it was for Anatole to have him do just that and slide his own hand between his legs, touching himself as Julian put on a show for him. No, he had other plans for his own orgasm but first he had other plans for Julian too. He commanded him to stop fingering himself after asking how ready he thought he was; if he had stretched himself like he had told him, too. 

“In that case, I want you to get my harness, and I want you to get my dick, and you’re putting them on.”

Julian indulged him, dropping to his knees to put it on Anatole, pulling it up and adjusting after he stepped into it. From his knees, Julian looks up at him, then at his cock, licking his lips. 

“Well, open up if you want to have your mouth put to use so badly.” 

Anatole pushed the tip of his cock against Julian’s lips, finding them pliant and already opening for him as he pushed his cock inside his mouth. He could fuck his mouth a little, as a treat. 

“Do you like that?” He said, as he thrust in and out of his mouth. “Do you like seizing my cock up with your mouth so you can imagine how it’d feel inside you?” Julian moaned around it; Anatole pushed deeper into his mouth on purpose.

“Or do you just like to be on your knees for me? You do look good sucking dick, so perhaps you have the right idea, sweetheart.” He ran his fingers through his hair, combing it back. “It’s certainly one of your best qualities. What do you think, sweetheart?”

Julian let go of Nana’s dick with a wet pop, the curve of his mouth turning into a smarmy grin. “I think my best quality is being a good pair of holes for you to fuck.”

Anatole laughed. “I think you have a lot of best qualities, but when you put it like that— shall we test your claim sweetheart?”

This time, Julian’s cuffs ended up tied to the ring on his lower back, though he was in the same position as before: his face against the bed, and on his knees. Nana moved the straps apart, teasing Julian’s asshole with his thumb. After slicking himself up with lube and warning him not to come without his permission and waiting for Julian’s reply, he pushed in. 

“Yes, ah, fuck, yes—”

Anatole spanked him once before gripping his hips and starting to move, thrusting in and out of Julian with long, angled strokes, alternating his pace, but having no intention to fuck him in any other way than hard. It was how Julian liked it, it was how he himself liked it.

His cock had spellwork done in that allowed him to feel as much as he wanted to. He controlled that. Normally, he wanted to feel it all, but today he opted for the faintest of levels. He wanted to feel Julian clench around him, he wanted to feel his tightness and the heat without making himself go too close to the edge. He planned to fuck him long, he planned to fuck him until he cried and see how many orgasms could Julian beg for. 

Julian sounded filthy, his moans and sounds mixing with the sound of skin slapping skin as they fucked. If that wasn’t indicator enough of how he felt, with his hands handcuffed behind his back Anatole could see him dig his own nails against his palm. Mouth-watering, a vision, delightful, were all ways to describe him like this, fucked and hungry, and ever so eager to be used until next week.

“Do you like it when I fuck you like this, sweetheart?” 

Julian’s yes was barely a word.

“Out of words already? I like my sluts to answer me with words when I talk to them. No words? You’re so fucking desperate, already. Such a desperate, eager slut for my dick. Do you like it when I tell you how warm you feel? How tight? How easy you take me despite it?”

Anatole untied his cuffs. “On your hands, come on.” 

He adjusted himself so he could keep fucking him while tugging on his hair at the same time. The moment Julian felt Anatole go for the grab on his hair, he arched his beck, bending himself as much as he could backwards, wanting to feel the tug that came with Anatole’s fingers finding his hair. 

Nana pulled him back a little more. “I said I liked my sluts to answer me with words when I talk to them. Do you think you can do that?”

“Yes, yes, ah, anything for you, anything for you Tolen’ka.” 

“That’s very sweet of you but it’s not going to make me go slower.”

“I don’t want you to go slower, I want you to use me like— fuck, please, sir, let me come.”

“Let you come? So soon? No.” 

He whimpered a yes that Anatole made him repeat, but he said ‘green’ when he checked, so he saw no reason to stop. Even if he decided to be a little indulgent and slow down the pace a little, to make it easier on Julian.

For a moment, Julian thought it would be fine, he really did and he really tried. In hindsight, that he had called Anatole ‘Tolen’ka’ should’ve been an indicator that he was not going to last under any circumstances. His arms gave out under him when he came, so he ended up propped on an elbow and his hand, though his arm bent. He came hard. There was no way Anatole wouldn’t be able to tell he did. 

Of course not, he had his dick inside him, and he knew how he sounded like when he came. They both went still, a sudden rush of affection making it hard for Nana to keep a straight face. He was flattered about it, but Julian knew how this was. The rules were clear, and this was on him for telling him ‘green’ when he suspected he might not be able to hold his orgasm until he had permission.

Anatole cleared his throat. “I believe I told you you couldn’t come unless I told you so.”

“I’m sorry, Nana, it just felt too good.” 

“You told me green, though. And I don’t think I’ve given you permission to call me Nana again, have I?”

He did have the decency to sound sheepish. “Yes… and no.” 

“Hm, well then, and I thought you could be good for me. This is clearly on you. Fucking and coming is a reward for good boys only.”

Anatole pulled out.

No, no, no, this wasn’t how it was supposed to go. Julian was supposed to be good, he was supposed to hold out and take Nana’s cock until he couldn’t walk, until he couldn’t form words, until Anatole decided he had been good enough, asking him to come for him one more time, only one more, and Julian would do it. Then he would beg for Nana to sit on his face, he’d beg to remove his cock and its harness just like he had put them on, and bury his tongue into the slick heat of Anatole—

He heard water. When did Nana make it to the bathroom? Was he cleaning his—? No, this couldn’t be it. He didn’t want it to be it yet, he wanted to be good. So he begged: he followed the sound and begged Anatole to touch him again, peppering kisses on his face and putting his hands on his waist. Anything, he said he would do anything. 

“Anything?” Anatole asked, a double edged question on his double edged tongue. 

“Anything.”

“That’s a lot of things I could do—” Anatole paused, a hum on his lips as he looked at himself and Julian in the mirror.

He pushed him against the wall, pinning him down on his biceps. “Stop looking at us through the mirror, I know my ass is pretty but do pay attention to me, sweetheart.” 

Anatole shifted one of his hands to push Julian back with his hand on his sternum, standing on his toes, leaning his weight on him. He held his chin firmly so he looked at him and not at their reflection. Anatole’s lips were close enough to brush Julian’s, but he didn’t let him move forward to kiss him when he tried. 

“You are here to serve, sweetheart, you do know that, don’t you?”

“I- I do, sir.”

Anatole ordered him to lie down on the bed, legs spread wide and open for him. He took the riding crop, moving it up and down the soft skin of his inner thighs. He called it a nice reminder before making him count up to six: three heart-shaped marked hits per thigh. Afterwards, he found a plug and grabbed one of his thighs to keep his legs apart, pushing the plug into Julian’s ass. 

“Just in case I decide to fuck you again. Now, if you’re here to serve, to be a good boy for me, then I should be the one coming, shouldn’t I?” 

Nana ushered him into the floor and on his knees with the crop before casting it aside and sitting on the edge of the bed. His foot found Julian’s shoulder, pushing back teasingly. 

“Make it worth my time, why don’t you, Ilya?”

He said his name in the same way he said ‘sweetheart’ when it was both a beckoning and a warning. 

Julian grabbed Anatole’s ankle, letting his mouth leave a trail of kisses over his calves, first the right one, then the left one, determined to worship every inch of his skin until he was close enough to his groin. 

“Please?” He said, licking his lips in anticipation. 

Anatole’s response was yet another hair tug to pull him closer, spreading his legs and swinging him behind his head and around his ears. 

“Eat up, sweetheart.”

He looked down at Julian with a cocky brow, angling his hips to grind against his mouth as it’s warmth met his folds, going past them into the slick heat between his thighs. Julian only moved to tell him how good he tasted and to thank him, sucking on his clit as soon as he had his face buried between his legs again. He lapped at him with his tongue, fucking him with it. He moaned against Anatole when he tugged his hair or gripped his skull, encouraged to keep going by the sounds now leaving Anatole’s lips. 

It felt good. The gentle pressure against his clitoris and the way Julian’s nose brushed it when he buried his tongue into him. It felt good to have his tongue circle his entrance, go down and then all the way up to suck on his clit again. Julian was good with his mouth, he had always been. Nana lost count of all the times they’ve found themselves like this, all the scenarios, all the places and the circumstances. Those always changed: the kitchen, the shower, his office, the library, the gardens, Julian’s clinic, once most notably under a staircase. What never changed was how his mouth felt on him. 

Julian looked up at him between his legs as he ate him out. Once more Anatole found himself lost in it. He didn’t let him stop after he came once, nor twice, though he did let him move back for air. The third time round Anatole found himself sitting on his face, pulling his hair back as his mouth hung open, gasping as his tongue circled his clitoris again. 

Maybe he would fuck him again, he thought as he rode his face. A mouth as good as that undid any trespass. 

[katahnisharma]

gone (4) | t.h.

Summary: tom is back from shooting cherry, but he’s not okay.

Warnings: this started as my entry to the lovely b’s writing challenge @worldoftom, but you guys were so amazing and wanted a second part. this is a very emotional chapter and there are mentions of anxiety, depression, and overall intense emotions so please be careful loveys ♡

A/N: hey guys it’s been a while but life has been really really difficult so i'm sorry for the wait! i'm not entirely sure if anyone still cares about this series so here’s hoping :) for this chapter i listened to light of love by florence + the machine and all good things come to an end by the og queen nelly furtado lol. also Tumblr apparently won’t let me link certain things so if you’re looking for my masterlist or playlist it’s in my bio ♡

IF YOU’RE STILL INTERESTED IN BEING ON MY TAGLIST PLEASE FILL OUT THE NEW FORM IN MY BIO BC I WILL BE REVAMPING IT!

gif by @hllands

“Hey, did I leave my notebook in the living room?” You asked, letting your tea bag soak in the mug Tom always saved for you. It was an unspoken rule, that dark blue cup with the constellations on it from his mother was yours only. You mentioned how beautiful it was once, and Tom remembered.

It went on the list with the others.

“You mean the one with the polaroid on the cover? No, it’s not in here.” Tom called back, scrolling through Netflix to find a movie for the both of you. He’d just come back from the junket for Spies in Disguise, and he immediately called his best friend over to spend the day with him.

Well, it was supposed to be more than just another day.

Because today he was going to tell you he loved you.

“Hmm, maybe I left it in my bag upstairs. I’ll get it when I’m done with the tea.” You said, setting your mug down on the counter. It looked like it needed sugar, so you rootled around for the little jar Tom kept in one of his cabinets.

“Don’t worry, I’ll go get it!” Tom said from the couch, his nerves beginning to make him jittery. He thought that while you were in the kitchen, picking a movie would help him calm down. But he couldn’t focus on any of the descriptions, and Tom could feel his heart beat faster and faster.

He needed to get up for a few minutes.

“Are you sure? Do you want me to pick the movie then?” You teased, knowing very well Tom hadn’t found a movie yet. It was a bit of a running gag, him never being able to pick a movie. You would bite your lip to stop from laughing when he eventually got frustrated and handed you the remote.

And even in his nervous state, Tom still grinned because of you.

“Yeah, yeah, like you’re any better. We’ve seen The Avengers twice!” He shot back, a smirk on his lips when he heard you scoff in the kitchen. Apart from your smile, making you jokingly annoyed was Tom’s favorite thing. He liked how cute you were when he teased you.

“Shut up and get my notebook, Tommy!” You laughed, and Tom felt his cheeks warm at the sound.

God you were so fucking perfect.

When Harrison woke up, he almost forgot where he was. But then his vision cleared and there you were, lying in the hospital bed. Harrison’s heart clenched at the sight, remembering the events of last night that landed you here with an IV in your arm. He sat up and stretched, the old wooden chair squeaking against the floor.

The sound was what made you stir, your mind waking up from the dream.

“Harrison?” You whispered, your eyes adjusting to the dim lights in the room. The hospital bed you’d fallen asleep in the night before seemed to glow next to you, but you realized it was just an IV hooked up in your arm. Harrison smiled softly, getting up and coming to stand by your side.

“Hey, you were out like a light.” He said, handing you the glass of water a nurse had brought. You gratefully brought it to your lips, feeling a little dehydrated from whatever fluids were in the IV bag. Harrison gave your free hand a squeeze before crossing to the windows, playing with the blinds to let some sun in.

“How long have you been here?” You asked, playing with the sheets mindlessly. Harrison thought about lying, telling you he’d only arrived a few minutes ago. Because he knew you’d feel bad about it, but you could always tell when he lied.

“Since last night. I stayed here, didn’t want you to be alone.” Harrison replied, and you frowned almost immediately. You felt bad enough that he’d driven you to the hospital on his day off, but knowing that he’d also spent the night sleeping in an uncomfortable, crappy chair didn’t help with the guilt.

“And before you say ‘you shouldn’t have’, just remember you would have done the same for me. So stop beating yourself up about it.” He said, going back to his chair. You winced when it made the same creaking sound, like it was about to break. Harrison noticed, and he couldn’t stop himself from laughing.

“But this chair was really unbearable.” He chuckled, and you finally smiled again.

“Shut up, you idiot.” You giggled, chucking a pillow at Harrison right as the nurse peeked in. You felt your face burn as she smiled at the two of you, Harrison picking up the pillow sheepishly and biting back a laugh.

“Glad to see the patient is feeling better. Can I get you anything, love?” She asked kindly, picking up the now empty class beside you. You smiled at her, shaking your head. You really just wanted to be discharged so you could leave, hospitals always made you nervous. The smell of disinfectant and the general sense of uncertainty were not your favorite sense overloads.

“No, but thank you for everything. Do you know if I’ll be able to leave today?” You asked, and the nurse nodded her head.

“You should be all set to be discharged in an hour. The doctor will check in on you in thirty minutes and then you’re all free to go.” She said, taking the pillow from an embarassed Harrison. You giggled a little when she fluffed the pillow, and returned it to your bed.

“Great, thank you again!” She gave you one last smile before leaving the room, and Harrison breathed a sigh of relief.

“Thank god, I’m really hungry.”

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For Harry, last night would probably be one of the worst and strangest of his life.

After Tom broke down and sobbed into his shirt for two hours straight, he became so frenetic that Harry was afraid he would end up accidentally hurting himself. Tom tried to pack a suitcase to go after you, but he almost slipped in the shower and was so disoriented that he ran into the bedroom wall. Then he tried to cook something on the stove for Harry, but left the fire on while he got distracted trying to find your favorite cereal. Tom wasn’t completely all there, and it was pretty obvious to Harry that he was having some sort of episode.

So once Tom was focused enough to eat the banana his brother opened for him, Harry called his mother.

“Mom, I need you to tell me the name of that anxiety medicine. The one that sometimes works as a sedative.” Harry cast a glance at Tom on the couch, watching him slowly chew the banana with glossy eyes. He had been silently crying at odd times this morning, and it was definitely making Harry nervous.

“Why? Harry, what’s happened?” Nikki immediately sounded worried, running over to the medicine cabinet. She kept the anxiety medicine mainly for Harry, who used to have pretty severe bouts himself. The episodes became few and far between, until they stopped altogether.

But now Nicki was concerned Harry was having them again.

“It’s not for me, Mum. It’s for Tom. I think he’s having some sort of breakdown, and I’m afraid he might accidentally do something stupid and hurt himself.” Harry said, looking over his shoulder to see Tom staring at the banana, almost lifelessly.

“For Tom? Harry, please tell me what’s going on.” Nikki said, clutching the bottle in her hand nervously.  

“I think Tom and Y/N might be over.” Harry said, and the words had more weight than he thought they would. Like it was finally a possible reality, one where you and Tom weren’t together anymore.

“Okay, I’m on my way.”

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“Can you get in the car alright? Need any help?” Harrison asked, hovering over you as the two of you walked to the hospital parking lot. You rolled your eyes, smiling at his protective behavior. He’d been like this during your dischargement too, and it was sweet but definitely unnecessary.

“Haz, I told you. I’m perfectly fine, I swear. It really doesn’t hurt that much, and I can absolutely get into the car on my own.” You said, patting his shoulder reassuringly. Harrison sighed, biting his lip a little worriedly.

“Okay, okay, just making sure. I just don’t want you to aggravate the injury or anything. At least not until we get you home and set up.” He replied, and you couldn’t help it. You leaned over and gave him a quick peck on the cheek, watching Harrison’s mouth immediately drop open in shock.

“Hey! What was that for?”

“To thank you for being the world’s greatest div. I love you, idiot.” You said, laughing when Harrison slung an arm around your shoulder. He rolled his eyes at you, smiling playfully.

“You know I love you too, but you really didn’t need to give me that weirdass kiss.” Harrison chuckled, immediately ducking into the car before you decided to throw your purse at him. Scoffing, you got into the passenger seat and punched him in the arm.

“Ow! That hurt!”

“I’ll have you know my kisses are wonderful!” You giggled, clapping a hand over your mouth when Harrison started to fake cry and clutch his arm.

“If I agree, will you leave me alone?” Harrison laughed, starting the car and reversing out of the parking lot. You smiled wickedly, reaching up to ruffle his precious hair. Harrison recoiled instantly, whining at your little stunt.

“I take it back, I actually hate you.”

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Where is he?” Nikki asked, rushing into the living room. Harry jumped up and led her to the bedroom, where Tom was curled up in a ball. Under the covers, he was crying softly and clutching what looked like a sweater. It seemed too small to be his, and Harry immediately realized it was your favorite sweater. The one Tom loved on you because it was what you were wearing when both of you met for the first time.

“Tom? Love, look at me please.” Nikki whispered, sitting on the edge of the bed. She looked over at Harry and mimed a glass of water, which he left to get from the kitchen. Once they were alone, Nikki gently pulled the covers back. Tom lay there, tears streaming down his face and the front of your sweater soaked.

“She’s gone...” Tom whimpered, trying to pull the covers back over his head. He was completely spent, the possibility that you were really gone hitting him like a train. Tom had pictured the rest of his life with you, and now nothing seemed worthwhile anymore if you weren’t there beside him.

“Y/N? Tell me what happened, Tom.” Nikki said, running a gentle hand through his hair. Tom relaxed under her touch, reminded of all the times in his childhood that he lay in bed upset. Breakups, rejections, failures, his mother had seen them all. And she'd always been there for him.

“We got into a fight...a big fight….and I threw my phone….”

“At her? Tom, how could you do that?” Nikki gasped softly, and Tom’s eyes widened. He found the strength to sit up, looking his mother right in the eyes.

“No...no! I would never hurt her! I threw it at the wall and I locked myself in the bathroom. But….when I came out….she was gone and there was b-blood on the f-floor and...I think-I think I-” Tom couldn’t get the rest of his words out, and Nikki knew enough to envelop her son in a hug.

“It’s okay...it’s okay, Tom.” She sighed, holding her eldest son close. The whole thing was confusing, but if Nikki knew anything about your relationship with Tom it was that it had been the best one he’d ever had. You were kind, intelligent, and strong, exactly what she had always wanted Tom to have in a partner. But hearing Tom cry and work himself up meant she knew what she needed to say. Tom had to stop living in his head.

“Tom? I want you to listen to me, it’ll be okay.”

“But….she’s gone and I hurt her….I can’t ever forgive myself…” Tom sobbed, but Nikki was adamant she would speak and get through to him.

“Look, the past is the past, it’s not in our hands.  You have the chance to ask for her forgiveness, and explain what you’re feeling right now. Don’t let your past actions dictate the future, love. That would be a mistake, because I know Y/N. She loves you and she wants to be there for you. She’ll understand what you’re going through because she cares, that’s what a real partner does. They want the best for you because it’s you. You need to forgive yourself so that she can help you heal.”

“But what if she doesn’t w-want me anymore? I know I scared her….I never wanted to do that b-but she’s been hurt and left because of me….I’m afraid Y/N won’t love me anymore!” Tom cried, his body shaking a little. Nikki rubbed his back and took the water glass from Harry, who’d reappeared in the room.

“Darling, you have to try. You have to fight for the love you want. You don’t think your father and I have gotten angry with each other? We fight and that’s normal, but at the end of it all we come back to each other. I put my feelings aside and listen to him, and he does the same. That’s how it works, we love each other so much that I’ll forgive him and he’ll forgive me.”

Nikki took Harry’s hand and held it, and Tom was finally still. There was no more crying, no more shaking. It was just a moment frozen in time, the three of them together in a little room. Harry hugged Tom and Nikki kissed his forehead, and for the first time in 36 hours Tom wasn’t afraid anymore. The fight wasn’t plaguing him anymore, and neither was the aftertaste of filming that had been slowly poisoning his mind. All he could see was you, like a vision before him wiping his tears away. With that same smile that he had fallen in love with so easily, because it was purely yours.

And that was enough for Tom to be at peace with himself.

“Thank you.” Tom whispered, and Nikki was able to smile again. Harry ruffled his hair, making Tom punch him softly in the arm. He reached for the water glass and the pills in Nikki’s hand, knowing that he needed to take them.

“Take these two and it’ll help a little with the anxiety. It’ll also make you a little drowsy, but it might be good to sleep it all off properly. I’ll stay here with Harry until you wake up, okay?” Nikki said, and Tom let him expend enough energy to nod and smile.

“Just...just please make sure Y/N is okay? Make sure that nothing’s wrong?” Tom said, and Nikki squeezed his right hand. Harry had his left.

“Always. Now get some real sleep, you’re going to need it...”

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“Can we please listen to something other than your terrible daily mix?” You laughed, Harrison clutching his chest to feign offence. He reluctantly handed you the aux cord and you smiled, knowing exactly what you wanted to play. Taking a couple seconds to sift through your own playlists, you found the song you were looking for and pressed play. Harrison smirked at your choice, rolling his eyes at the songs you played over and over again. He attempted to steal the aux back from you, but you dodged him quickly.

“Hey, focus mister! I’m not about to get into an accident right out of the hospital!” You said, giggling as he started to belt out the lyrics and dance. He laughed, rolling his eyes as he focused on the road again.

“I’m a great driver! I’m just trying to save myself from your shit music taste.” He said with a smirk and now it was your turn to roll your eyes. Harrison wasn’t a bad driver, but he definitely wasn’t a great one. The first time you had gotten into the car with him had been to get groceries and it was a disaster. He forgot to turn around before reversing and nearly hit a little old lady with her cart, and almost got hit merging onto the highway. After that, you were careful to look out for him even if it meant you became a backseat driver.

“Sure, Haz. Whatever you want to believe. Just please get us home in one piece!” You laughed, leaning your head back and letting the sunlight warm your face. If not for the events of the previous day, you would have basked in the glory of such a beautiful day.

But your mind turned to Tom, as it always seemed to.

“Hey, is my bag in the back?” You asked, suddenly desperate to check its contents. Harrison turned down the music, furrowing his eyebrows at your change in mood. You turned to look at him, a slight fear in your eyes. Harrison nodded, gesturing to the backseat.

“Yeah, it’s there. Why? What’s wrong?”

“I just...I just need to make sure something is in there…” You trailed off, swiveling in your seat to grab at your handbag. Harrison watched from the corner of his eye as you set it on your lap, rootling through it quickly.

“Whoa, whoa. What are you looking for?” Harrison asked, a little concerned by how frantic you seemed to be. With a sigh of relief, you feel your hands grasp what you’re looking for and you pull it out slowly. Harrison’s eyes automatically soften, seeing your eyes water with your most prized possession in your hand.

“Is that the notebook Tom bought you? The one he bought you when he found out you wanted to be a writer?”

“Y-yeah...it is. I just wanted to make sure it was still there, you know? That’s dumb, isn’t it? I mean...he probably doesn’t even want to be with me a-anymore. So...so why am I….why am I holding on like this?” You felt the dam break finally, the tears streaming down your face. Harrison bit his lip, pulling the car over and unbuckling his seatbelt.

“Hey...hey...look at me.” Your tears were staining the cover, the little drops of water creating little streams on the surface. It felt like someone had pulled the rug from underneath you, and that you’d discovered there was no floor. What would you do without Tom? You loved him more than anything, but you were no fool. His anger couldn’t have come from out of the blue, it was something repressed that Tom had been feeling for a long time. Without warning, your insecurities began to mount.

Maybe he was bored of you.

Maybe you annoyed him.

Maybe he’d found someone else.

Maybe you weren’t good enough and he’d realized it.

And then the worst of them all.

Maybe the rest of the world was right.

“I’m losing him.” You whispered, and Harrison’s heart clenched at your words. He knew you were always insecure about dating Tom, but you’d never vocalized anything like this before.

“No, no you’re…”

“I’m not an idiot, Haz! I’ve seen the signs! H-he’s done with me….I’m just d-delaying the inevitable. I should have….I should have known I wasn’t good enough for him. He’s him and I’m j-just me, who the hell was I fooling? E-even the fans knew it!”

“Y/N...come on...that’s not-”

“He hasn’t wanted to spend any real time with me since he came back from Cherry. It’s like I don’t even exist to him, I’m invisible until he has to talk to me. I’ve tried five times to get him to have dinner with me and he rejected me every time, Haz. All I’ve heard for two months is ‘I’m going out with the boys, sorry’ or ‘Just going to sleep, don’t feel like eating’. And I tried to understand, I really did. It must have been so hard shooting a movie like that, it would be emotionally draining for anyone. Hell, even the book is emotionally draining-”

“I don’t think...”

“Let me finish, please? Haz, I can’t do this anymore. I’m tired, I’m so tired. I can’t fight for this relationship anymore when I’m not even sure if he wants it. He pushes me away all the time and it hurts me to see him like that. Tom isn’t happy, and I think it’s because of me. So I won’t hold him back anymore, I’ll just quietly disappear. No drama, no fighting, nothing. I can’t bear knowing I’m the reason he’s unhappy, it would kill me to think that.”

You broke again, the tears burning your eyes as you clutched the notebook tighter to your chest. It brought you a little comfort, knowing what you would have to do next. You needed to leave Tom, to let him live his life and be happy. You clearly couldn’t make him happy anymore and though that was something you’d struggled to accept in the last few hours, it was the right thing to do. You had no delusions about the way you looked, you always felt rather plain and boring compared to the beautiful women Tom was used to being around. He would be better off with someone else, someone as amazing as him.

Someone who isn’t you.

Harrison’s throat went dry as you slowly raised a hand to wipe at your tears, your eyes glossing over as you stared lifelessly out the window. He had a horrible feeling that you were serious about what you had just said, and he wasn’t sure how all this had happened. How could he have let you feel like this?

How could they not have noticed?

“Please, please don’t say-”

“Harrison, I have to. I can’t do this anymore.” You whispered, and Harrison stopped mid sentence. You never called him by his full name, it was always just Haz. He squeezed your hand as you cried, sobs wracking your body that made him cry too. You barely got the words out, but Harrison knew them before you said it.

“I have to leave because I love him.”

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