#the rat teaches

[ironinkpen]

the rat grinders getting whomped because they don't know how actual combat works is exactly what I've been waiting for all season. fabian taking down ivy in one turn bc they have no hp, them grouping up bc they don't know they're not supposed to and getting immediately shit on by adaine, riz's attack of opportunity doing more damage to kipperlilly than her actual attack did to him, gorgug taking down oisin by the end of round 1 bc they didn't protect their wizard, kristen and k2 both bringing all their friends up while keeping themselves strategically hidden bc they know better, riz diving into the lava like it's nothing bc he's a badass, adaine slapping jace's counterspell out of the air, fig tanking that hit from porter and casting that clutch fireball. just. beautiful. iconic. poetic. exactly what the rat grinders deserve after xp grinding for three years instead of actually adventuring. you fucking suck at this game kipperlilly!! you might be high level but you're shit at pvp!!!!!

[cliopadra]

Sorry, it’s rat man time again 🕺✨

[emiko-matsui]

the rat grinders vs the bad kids on adventuring is kind of like teaching high school. the rat grinders have ten years of education on what they're gonna teach and every fact checked, but they have never interacted with a group of three or more teenagers before. the bad kids have a general base and are handed a lesson plan, but they have five years of camp counselling and four younger siblings in their bag

[flamingfoxninja]

This makes so much sense why Kipperlilly was asking about how Kristen made Yes! And specifically Where she made Yes! at.

Kristen made a whole new Deity through Arthur Augfort's office and school. As a powerful cleric she reached into the Astral Plane and made life out of her questioning and worship. She temporarily had access to the realm of dead gods to make something from nothing. This was all set in the making from day one.

Jace was working with Kalina and Arianwen to revive The Nightmare King and The Rage Goddess. That's what Ragh saw in front of the office after Prompocolypse. They used Kalvaxis wanting to regain his power as a bigger play to bring back their corrupted and dead deities. A chess piece in a series of steps.

While Kalina was going to bring back The Nightmare King, Jace would work on bringing back The Rage Goddess through Elmville. Kristen already proved that Augefort Academy has access to the Astral Plane. He found and targeted students susceptible to rage, took them to the Mountains of Chaos where the Divine Wedding took place and force the students to make a choice: live for Rage or stay dead.

The Rat Grinders made that choice except for Lucy. Which is a problem because the Need a Cleric. The people the Rat Grinders killed from the school have been Clerics, because with Kristen's method you need a powerful connection to a Deity and Worship to bring life to one.

Lucy worshiped a Giant Goddess, she would have been perfect but she refused.

Yolanda gave up any affiliation to a specific deity, neutral but powerful in worship. She would be a worthy vessel but she refused.

Buddy was brought to always be killed. A follower of Helio, the son of Sol who had corrupted the Goddesses in the first place. He is the grandson of a powerful Cleric, and has that same connection and power within himself. Kipperlilly didn't kill Buddy in panic, that was the plan all along: bypass Obliviti Mori by killing a cleric to meet the Rage Goddess in the Astral Plane, then revive them to spread the word and start the ritual. Buddy was just the first one to accept.

Like in Sylvaire, they are seeding Rage to make their own version of the Nightmare Forest to bring back The Rage Goddess. It's going to bloom and spread, rake over Elmville and the Augefort Academy where the Astral Connection is.

These plans have been started since Freshman Year, and have been defeated all because on goblin was just trying to find his babysitter and another halfling just couldn't handle that.

[scatterbrainedbot]

Hello :D

You're so cool

Anyway have you thought that in your rat sons au Splinter might outlive the boys?

You're very cool :D love your stuff dude

(tw for some blood, light gore, implied overdose (kinda??))

hi copper!!! this is a fantastic question!

so obviously typical irl rats have far shorter lifespans than the average irl tortoise. according to google (yes, be awed by my spectacularly in-depth wealth of research) the average pet rat lives between 2-4 years ish, and the oldest on record lived to be about 7. meanwhile, an African spurred tortoise (Splinter's species) averages more around a 50ish year lifespan in captivity, tho is suspected to possibly exceed 75 or more in the wild.

Now, the mutation does give us a lot of wiggle room for playing with these numbers. For the rat sons boys, id say their natural lifespan probably clocks in at about 45-55 years old? definitely not old by human standards, but not young young either. (though, its also important to note that the boys were exposed to the mutagen just days after being born.)

For Splinter, meanwhile, aging is slightly more complicated. He lived the vast majority of his life as a regular normal African spurred tortoise (well, non-mutated at least. there were perhaps some shenanigans of a more mystical variety going on before he was mutated, but thats a separate matter) He was about 70ish i think? when the boys were born and they were all exposed to the mutagen. so he is already distinctly an old man turtle papa. id guess he'd probably still have another eh lets say 25-30 years after his mutation. he could probably push it a little farther even with some mystic nonsense, but when push comes to shove id say his 'natural' post-mutation lifespan would put his death like a solid decade or two before his sons.

of course, the tricky part of the matter is that theres no way for Splinter to know any of this. theres no way for him to know how the mutation affected them all, or if it even affected them all in the same way. especially since the boys dont show many physical signs of mutation for the first few years, and just kinda look like normal rats, (albeit with a more human sort of intelligence) — what sort of health standard do you hold them to? what if they simply dont show external signs of sickness or old age anymore? how do you actually know if something is wrong?

for a while there Splinter is very worried that one of his babies will just essentially reach the end of their normal rat lifespan, fall and not get up again.

so mostly, he just tries to live in the moment, enjoying whatever time he does have with his little ones, taking each day as a gift <3

still,

that fear

never

really

goes

away.....

[blackholesun321]

Guys while hallucinating on my new meds, I came to the realization that Mihawk was out on the open seas as swordsman since he was a teenager maybe even younger…. Did he ever finish a normal education?

Scratch that did he even have a normal education? Does he know math? Can my guy tell me the quadratic formula? Like I think we all forget as individuals how much school taught us yes the school system is broken blah blah but guys we understand germ theory and how birds fly and chemistry and biology that people just 60 years ago wouldn’t have known and would have killed to know, like I’m sure he can write and I’m pretty sure he can read but does he know how the moon pulls the tide? Did he know the earth wasn’t flat until he saw a globe for the first time?

Have we as individuals been bamboozled by the stoic gothic refinement of luxury that Mihawk projects we completely overlooked they fact the guy probably doesn’t know salt is a rock? Like wanna bet he saw how cool the over the top refined gay goth was and just like tailored that too his vibe but he’s never actually read a classic in his life?

What I’m trying to get at is Shanks who grew up around some of the smartest people in the world who spoke multiple languages, one was a doctor and you know Rayliegh who definitely doubled as a quartermaster might have a higher education then Mihawk.

Like I think it would be funny if Shanks was the guy who read books on Philosophy and artistic historical movements throughout the world (cough to impress Mihawk cough) and Mihawk doesn’t know how fish breathe underwater and has never read anything higher the a YA novel. (Which are awesome books but talk about reading a book by its cover! Lol… I’ll see myself out.)

[idontcarecarebear]

Late but it’s true !!

[babykittenteach]

Rat friend sent me an edit of Ed with a sticker flower crown so here's my own.

[polysaur]

Drywall cannot stop her.

[thedragonboi]

“This bird looks like some kind of dinosaur”

Buddy Boy You’re Never Gonna Believe This

[wormthing]

that's it you're going to gregory house

[n3v3r-l3ft]

Are you serious? Are putting on the same level Izzy's words (as toxic as they are) to the physical violence of Ed cutting off his toes?? I love Ed, but we can't justify every bad action of him, he's not an innocent baby!

I'm actually so serious, Anon.

Are you?

Are you seriously going to sit here and tell a 2Spirit Native that calling the English Navy (the cops) on Ed (a queer brown man) and his boyfriend isn't physical violence? Those aren't words. Those are actions.

Aside from that, he's been manipulating, belittling and abusing Ed the entire first season. Abuse is abuse; it being non-physical at first doesn't diminish that it was abuse. Emotional and mental abuse is just as much abuse.

Izzy undermines Ed constantly. When he doesn't like a choice Ed makes (for himself) he goes behind Ed's back and sends his ex boyfriend to literally manipulate him into leaving Stede. He calls him derogatory terms in regards to his queerness and straight up tells him he should have let the English kill him. If that doesn't read as a vague death-threat idk what does.

And he said that to Ed in one of his most vulnerable moments, while healing from heartache, after Ed literally saved him from the crew's mutiny.

I'd also like to add that Ed warned him. After that first toe we saw in s1, he told Izzy "threaten me again, ever, and I'll feed you the rest"

🤷‍♂️

This isn't to say I don't think Izzy deserves a support group, but I don't think he's entitled to one (or my sympathy) when the toxic environment is something he's curated since day one.

Ed isn't abusive, he's reacting to abuse.

Again:

[larabar]

finally finished another sketchbook good riddance🎉

[aghostnamedcalamity]

I wonder what else Benjamin inherited from Mordecai LOLOL

Not his sociopathy, that’s for sure. Boys got a lot of feelings…maybe a bit too many.

His personality takes after his Aunt Rose more so than Mordecai. Unfortunately he does inherit his myopia, though not to the extent Mordecai suffers from it and he refuses to wear glasses when he gets older (something Mordecai takes mild offense to).

FYI he don’t know that rat lol he just found it. And it took him two hours to convince Mord to honor the rat’s life with him.

[haileybirdart]

Our Flag Means Death season 2 ep.2 spoiler with no context

[kingworm]

there is a duality that claudia was a forty year old woman, who essentially joined a cult - louis warned her, but what else are you to do? she is not a child, though trapped in the body of one, that is to say that although it would come from a place of pride and claudia being an extension of himself as her maker: lestat would have never allowed her to be so ridiculed and humiliated