#the things i would do to eat strawberry ice cream out of a large bucket rn

[kunikidas-lost-glasses]

I wanna eat ice cream out of a comically large ice cream bucket and cry my eyes out while I watch silly little reality shows on TV were silly little people do silly things.

[poptod]

Pretty, Little Doll (Merriel Shelton x Reader)

Description: Merriel makes friends with the pretty little doll serving ice cream.

Notes: jus thinking about ice cream. implied female reader, but this.. is too much. theres just too much here. youve been warned. edit: wait no u havent. the warning is that theres suggestive themes and such WC: 2.3k

+

After working long hours in the broiling sun of the south, what felt best down his parched throat was a beer––a bar where many of his friends and coworkers drank at, and the waitresses wore low-cut dresses with short hems and long stockings. That sight went down wonderfully with several drinks, but what drew his attention today was a newly opened shop.

There was no sign, but the large, pristine windows gave a good view of the inside. Clean, white walls with several tables and chairs to the left, and a counter to order at on the right. Behind it stood you, dressed to the nines in ruffles and bows as you opened up the shop, displaying buckets of ice cream.

Merriel grinned. Lopsided and toothy, and he jogged inside, sweat and dirt still trailing down his skin and clothes. With his shirt slung over his bare shoulder, he met your eye and his cocky smile returned as his chin tilted high.

"Afternoon," he drawled as he approached the counter, barely grazing over the different flavors before returning to you.

"Good afternoon," you said in a much quieter voice, though you did mimic his smile, just more politely. "How may I help you?"

"You new here?" He asked, gesturing generally to the shop.

"Oh, yes," you said. "My grandmother always wanted an ice cream parlor, so.. I thought I could help her."

"That's awful sweet of ya," he said as he leant on the counter, tilting ever closer to you. "This ice cream sweet as you, boo?"

Your mouth fell open, eyes widening as you did a double take. For a moment you were at a loss for words, but you quickly attempted to stammer out a response, a blush burning your face.

"Well, um, we have, uh, strawberry, and um.. chocolate, vanilla, cherry, and uh, banana. And bourbon."

"Bourbon?" He said, a single brow kinked upwards.

"It's my grandma's favorite," you said with a sheepish chuckle.

"Damn, girl. Grandma knows how to have fun," he laughed.

"Would you like to try it?"

Only if I can lick it off you, he thought, his attention drifting to the soft skin of your neck. The thought of it melting down and pooling in your clavicle. While usually he didn't bother to censor himself for anyone, you seemed a little fainthearted. His chances with you would probably be ruined after one too-strange comment.

"Sure," was what he said instead. "Long as it's cold I don't care."

"I understand that. I moved here recently and it's certainly something to try and adapt to the heat," you rambled as you stuck a tiny plastic spoon in the bourbon ice cream, giving him the single bite. "Are you a local?"

"Been here long's I remember," he said, taking the spoon. "What time do ya get off today?"

"Oh, um," you fixed the ruffles on your collar, "I won't be finished till late. We're not all set up yet."

"If y' need some help, I'd be happy to offer my expertise. I do a hell of a lot a' nailin' things ta the wall."

You stared at him again, once more losing your words. He hadn't quite meant what he said, but the fluster he left you in had him grinning, humored by the connotation you'd incorrectly understood.

"That – that'd be very nice of you," you said, wringing your hands. "I don't want to bother you. You look.. busy."

He didn't miss how your eyes raked up his body, from his wrinkled, dusty pants up his bare waist and chest still gleaming with the sweat of morning work. His jaw could cut hearts and he knew that very well; accented it whenever he could as he cocked his chin upwards, watching carefully as your breath froze.

"I won't be busy tonight. How 'bout this." He walked up right to the counter, pressing his hips into the edge of it. "I come after I finish up ma' own job, and I'll give ya' a hand. Don't even gotta pay me."

"Really? But –"

"Don't worry 'bout it. 'S nothin' for a pretty doll like you."

"At least let me get you a cone? It's hot out today," you offered, reaching for the largest waffle cones you had.

The guys wouldn't really take well to him eating ice cream instead of drinking, but he figured they'd eat their words when they saw you.

"Won't say no to that."

As much as he wanted to boast about you, how pretty and sweet you were and how he so easily slid his way into your life, he didn't want his friends finding your shop and vandalizing it with their own dirty boots and flirtatious looks. Only he could do that.

In the evening he returned as promised, having walked from his house on the outskirts of town to your shop on the main street. The build, decorum, and location of the shop screamed rich family to him. No one in his state would be able to afford a business on main street, much less fully renovated and repainted. He could ask you, he decided, about your family, your grandmother, and of course you.

Inside, you were closing up the tubs of ice cream, hauling them out of the display case and into a back storage room. He knocked before he entered, earning a muffled 'come in!' from you.

Before either of you could speak, both the buckets in your arms began to slip, and he ran round to the other side of the counter to help. He took one from you to ease the load.

"Careful, cher," he said, grabbing another bucket in his other arm. "Don't wanna break yaself."

"Thank you," you said, mostly ignoring his comment. "My grandma is in the other room, so just, um.. be polite and proper."

Fat fuckin' chance, he thought in his head, but fortunately did not say aloud as he followed you.

The door swung open into a freezer room, where an old lady stood in the corner, covered head to toe in coats as she stirred.

"I keep telling you to let me do that," you sighed, setting down your container before rushing to her side.

"I can do it quite well myself. I'm not useless, you know," your grandmother said, staring you down with a glare. You hesitated, gauging her carefully, before you relented with another exasperated sigh.

"Fine, alright," you said quietly. "I'll go work on hanging up all the paintings and such."

"Thank you, dear."

You motioned to him as you passed by, pushing open the door and heading out of the freezer. He once again followed you, watching your ass with a grin you never saw.

"We need to hang up these," you said as you brought him to one of the circular tables, each of which carried a small pile of paintings, license plates, or tin posters.

"You got a ladder?" He asked, glancing to the high walls.

"Yes sir," you said, sorting through the different posters. He quirked a brow, intrigued by the possibility of that nickname.

"I neva did get ya name," he said as he leant on one of the tables.

"(Y/N). What's yours?"

"Pretty name for a pretty doll," he half sung, the same, one-sided smile stretched lazily across his face. "My name's Merriel."

"Also a pretty name," you said, picking the largest poster to start with. A pin-up girl in a sailor's suit. "Our ladder isn't all that steady. Will you hold it for me?"

He opened his mouth to offer himself up, but with one look to the ruffled skirt you wore, he shut himself up.

"'Course," was what he said instead.

Everything was a bit of a game––one you were unwittingly a part of, and one where you played your role rather well. A sweet, unassuming little thing, essentially a toy for him, accepting his help and letting him in. He hated to act the predator, but when it came to you he couldn't help it.

That was how he saw it. Hunting you down and taking you for his own at the end of a long chase. However, to any outsider, it appeared in a much simpler way; a young man doing anything for someone he'd developed a crush on. That was how it truly was, though the innocence of his crush was abruptly stripped away as he held the ladder, staring shamelessly up your skirt.

"Merriel?"

"Huh?" He said, broken out of his dreamy trance.

"I said could you hand me another nail," you said, pointing towards the package of nails with your hammer.

"Oh. You sure ya ain't gonna fall if I leave?" He asked with a grin. You chuckled, shaking your head.

"I'll be alright."

"If you say so, boo."

After a little while he supposed he ought to offer some more help than holding a rickety ladder, and took your place at the top with a hammer in his hand and nails in his mouth. As promised, his experience with nailing things to the wall (nails specifically, not women) made him much faster than you, and the entirety of the wall behind the counter was covered within fifty minutes.

"Thank you for your help, again," you said as you put away the hammer and nails.

"My pleasure," he said, the image of your thighs still fresh in his mind. "If y' ever need help.. I'm happy t' to be of service."

"Well, thank you. Come stop by again soon. On the house," you said as he left, peeking your head out the door and giggling.

"You know I'm stoppin' by again, get two things done in one trip. Some'in sweet for th' eyes and the tongue," he laughed, watching your face light up with a blush.

And it ain't just the ice cream, he thought.

Over the course of the coming summer, he left drinking for the evening, and instead visited your shop over his lunch break. You insisted on giving his cones for free considering he continued to help you out, but he usually found ways to sneak you the money anyway. You were not, as he assumed earlier, a very rich family.

His favorite activity, which he found rather early on, was to sit outside on burning hot days, his shirt draped over the back of his chair as he ate. Through the pristine glass, he spied you watching him often.

You couldn't help it either. Most of your life was spent in your family cabin, cutting you off from many teen and early adulthood experiences. People flirting with you was a lot to deal with, especially when it came from someone as pretty as him, the smooth dips and ripples of his lean muscles shining with sweat and dirt from his construction site.

His tongue. Ever since he made that comment on that first evening you met, you hadn't been able to get it out of your mind. How it rolled and drawled between his puffy lips drawn backwards with his teeth, in a very specific method you'd pinned down to 'the Tongue Thing'.

Your heated, embarrassed blush only worsened as ice cream dripped down his fingers from the heat, cleaned up by a sharp and precise tongue. You could hardly breathe watching him like that, but as he caught your eye you turned quickly away.

His bravado had clearly earned a huge boost from catching you mid-drool, prevalent in his step as he waltzed back into your store. You hardly met his eye, pretending to clean up the counter, but that didn't stop him. He walked right up to you, leaning down with his elbows on the stone, forcing you to stop and look at him, which you did with incredible reluctance.

"You been watchin' me, cher?" He asked, close enough to see his reflection in your wide eyes.

"No," you said quietly.

"A' think you're lyin'," he said, leaning in closer yet. "Betta' not do that. Could land you in some trouble."

You raised your brows.

"Are you threatening me?"

"Not with anythin' ya can't take," he said as he raked his eyes purposefully slow down your body. When you appeared to be at a loss for words, he said, "I'll ask ya again. Were you watching me?"

"... and if I don't answer?" You tested carefully.

"Well then, I think there's too much space between us," he said, grinning cockily as he jumped the counter, crowding you suddenly.

You drew in a sharp breath, backing up as he continued to step forwards till he pinned you to the wall with his hips.

"Tell the truth, baby." he drawled, carefully setting his hands on your hips and pulling you in. Something hard poked you.

"I – I wasn't staring, I –"

He half-grinded into you, pressing you tighter against the wall as his hands drew upwards, resting at your waist.

"Such a pretty thing," he mumbled beneath his breath, watching your stumbling reaction closely.

By pinning you with his hips, he had free roam to move his hands, one of which toyed with the hem of your skirt. It was wrong, certainly, and it was also illegal since you were in plain view of main street, but he lost control the minute his fingertips brushed the soft, supple skin of your thigh.

Your breathing hastened, hips yearning for something, though you didn't know what. When the rough skin of his fingers suddenly brushed inbetween your thighs your hands shot up to steady yourself on Merriel's shoulders. He laughed, running a finger through your lips, finding you already soaked and not wearing underwear. Instantly his laugh faded, devolving into a long, needy moan as his hips once more pushed up into you.

"Th – there's someone – someone coming," you said, eyes darting to the front door.

Immediately he was off you, stepping to the side as you straightened yourself out. You walked forward with shaky legs, which he most definitely noticed, and took the mother and son's orders as usual. When you finished you glanced to him, your heart stopping at the sight of him licking your slick from his fingers.

"I guess your ice cream is as sweet as you, boo," he murmured in your ear, giving you no chance to react before rushing back out to return to his construction job.

[youarejesting]

Hope in the Sheets.4

[Masterlist]

Beta: N/A Pairing: Hoseok x Reader Genre: Friendship, Comedy, Soft boy, Fluff, SMUT, Friends2Lovers,

Summary: You held many titles: his neighbor, colleague, wing-man… well, more likely a wing-woman, yet most importantly, you were his best friend. You had been friends since you were born. Between the two of you, you were younger; barely, but he never let you forget it. He always seemed to ruffle your hair and tease you, which could get rather annoying but he made up for it by treating you to things. What if a drunken one night stand between you and your best friend Hoseok leads to more complicated situations? Your reckless twenties are cut short as you find yourself suddenly responsible for something a little more.

Warning: Reference to a previous sexual encounter, pregnancy, Toxic Family.

You were sitting at the bar drinking your fourth glass of orange juice, the sweet citrus flavour was really hitting the spot. Laying your head onto the polished shiny wood you could see the dance floor lit completely. Jimin swept the floor and mopped it diligently, of course they cleaned up thoroughly when they closed the bar but Jimin prefers to clean again. 

You felt a fondness blooming in your chest watching Jimin dancing around with the mop in hand. Yoongi was setting up and testing each speaker individually and testing out his equipment.

There were two hours left before the bar opened and Seokjin began ordering some food, Jimin got a text as he was putting the mop and now empty bucket away. Yoongi leaned over to read it —That guy had no shame— “Hoseok is on his way over”

“Really?” You asked a little nervous to see Hoseok so soon, you hadn’t even figured things out, you weren’t ready to see him. 

“You sound surprised but we have pizza night every second friday” Namjoon smiled exiting the staff room, smelling clean and fresh his hair combed back. 

A part of you happy for the oncoming pizza boxes heading your way. Seokjin began by placing a container in front of you, you opened it excited. A large part of you hoping it was some fried chicken, only to see plainly seasoned roast chicken and vegetables. 

Seokjin had already started acting protective, reading the pamphlets and telling you, you can’t have barbeque, raw fish, deli meats or soft cheese. So you were enviable of their pepperoni cheese heaven.

“We haven’t had pizza night since before the renovations behind the bar, did you see the difference compare to last month when you had come in?” Namjoon added unmoving as Jimin gracefully spun around him heading towards the door unlocking it for Hoseok to come in when he arrived. 

“I don’t really remember much about that night and what I do know I have tried to repress” You couldn’t help but pout looking at the plate of beans, you could eat most veggies but beans were the worst. You pushed the plate away and Seokjin pushed it back and you looked up with puppy dog eyes and he shook his head.

“He could not have been that bad,” Yoongi said, missing the exchange between the two of you, especially the way you were making rude gestures to the manager. “I have danced with Hoseok, he knows how to grind.”

“What’s all this?” Namjoon said, sitting at the table and looking over the pamphlets Seokjin was reading. “Who is pregnant?”

“I didn’t want to tell you?” Seokjin looked at Namjoon his lips pursed the way they do when he tries to keep a straight face, “but I am pregnant”

“Haha, guys can’t get pregnant” A small voice chuckled and you saw a familiar face. He was freshly showered and looking well dressed in black boots pants and button up. 

“Oh everyone this is Jeon Jungkook, Seokjin and I hired him to help with the door and any rough housing” He gave a nervous smile, looking around. He opened his mouth to talk when the front door opened. Jungkook turned squaring his shoulders only to be deflated by Jimin carrying drinks “Jungkook sit down this is Hoseok”

You smiled pulling out your seat to the left and gesturing for Jungkook to sit. Hoseok faltered whilst removing his jacket for a moment, questioning why you had let Jungkook sit on your left. Genuinely sorry, you gave him an apologetic look. He laughed and walked across to the bar where he pulled out a pair of your spare shoes from his bag and placed them in the staff room. You found out last time that he was the one leaving your shoes at the bar but to actually see him do it was really sweet.

“Do you work here as well Noona?” The apprentice bouncer asked pulling your attention away from your neighbor and best friend.

“No, I just stop by every Friday for pizza night” 

“But you're not eating pizza?” He raised an eyebrow. 

“I will trade you some beans for a slice” you grinned and he nodded picking up a slice and turning to you and freezing “um… maybe not”

“No, you need to eat healthier,” Seokjin argued. 

“But they are disgusting!” You whined letting your head fall back. 

“Eat them or no ice cream” He stood up heading behind the bar for a tub of ice cream that was used for special cocktails. 

“ice cream?” You almost gave yourself whiplash with how fast your head lifted. 

“Eat the beans and you get ice cream!” He said sternly and Hoseok moved around the table and stole a bean. “And no help from Hoseok” huffing and putting them in your mouth grumbling as you chewed. 

“That wasn’t so bad was it?” He said

“I hate it, the texture is wrong, it’s not food”

“But you did it, so what ice cream would you like?”

“Cookie dough?”

“Can’t have raw egg, I got chocolate, vanilla and strawberry”

“We have coffee too…” Jimin’s voice died out with the glare Seokjin gave. 

“This house is a prison” you frowned, throwing a stray bean at Seokjin and he laughed handing you a bowl of chocolate ice cream. 

“Hey are we partying tonight?” Hoseok asked around a mouth full or pizza, how could he be so damn handsome even when he is doing the weirdest things. “Ah but you haven’t gotten changed from your work uniform”

“No, I am just having dinner and heading home, tonight” you sighed “doctors orders”

“Oh well I guess, we can go out another night or something” he said being polite and waiting for you to talk about your doctor's appointment, Hoseok never pried with things like this. Jungkook was a charming young man and Yoongi asked for a dance. 

It was Yoongi’s version of bonding, he held your waist and gently moved to the music and you laid your head on his chest. “You okay?” He asked the gravel in his voice was almost purr like and woke you from your daze. 

“Just tired” the words mumbled as you hugged his torso, his heart beating a steady rhythm. 

“You are thinking too much, no more thinking tonight, just go home and get some rest and think some more tomorrow” pulling away he looked you in the eyes taking your face in his hands he kissed your forehead. “I will support you and your body no matter the decision”

“Thanks Yoongi, I decided I’m not going to get the prescription. I think a part of me already loves them way too much” touching your lower belly, allowing yourself to be a little excited, if only for the moment. 

You were worried and you should be. This was a big deal, but something about the support the boys gave you made it almost exciting. You began to day dream about a baby just like Hobi running around your apartment and cringed, taking the child to school on the bus before going to work. 

Blanching at the thought, you needed to put the baby first and your life right now wasn’t good enough to support a family. It was time to stop thinking single and start thinking like a mother. 

Maybe Yoongi was right, it was time to stop thinking, get through the night and plan everything tomorrow. With you in tow Yoongi led you back to the other, he placed your hand in Hoseoks and told him to take you home. 

Hoseok nodded getting your coats and thanking them all for dinner, he reassured Jungkook he was in good hands and told him to relax. Hoseok helped you dutifully into your coat looking longingly at the bar you frowned feeling bad for him. 

He took your hand in his warm one and walked you to the door opening it for you like a gentleman. He noticed how miserable you seemed and took your hand racing down the sidewalk until he arrived at a small convenience store. 

“Wait here.” He turned to you and paused looking you over with a smile “you look really pretty today”

You visibly reddened a considerable amount enough so that Hoseok noticed grinning and ran into the shop. Watching his head pop up over the aisles as he ran back and forth, you had no clue what he was looking for but clearly he did as he raced back and forth not once appearing lost.

He emerged with a biodegradable bag filled with an assortment of midnight snacks. He opened the bag letting you peek inside. “I got all your favourites, we can go home and watch some late night telly or one of your favourite movies” 

Your mood skyrocketed. Grasping his hand, swinging it enthusiastically on the way home. Hoseok stepped between you and a group of men smoking and drinking on a bench. He gave them a curt but polite ‘good evening’ and continued guiding you along. 

The two of you made it to the door seeing the door had been pried open. “Again, I hate this stupid appartment, let’s hope they got bored before they reached our apartments.”

They got to their doors and thankfully noticed that they were not broken into. “We need to add a few more locks on the doors.”

“Or you know move” You laughed

“Come on the rent is almost nonexistent and the pizza shop is in sight, what else do two bachelors need in their lives.” He laughed flopping onto your couch and grinning at you upside down.

You placed the snacks into a bowl and placed it on the coffee table as Hoseok began flipping through the channels. “Knocked up is on you wanna watch that?”

The scene that happened to play was at the restaurant where Katherine Heigl announces she is pregnant and the father makes a witty clueless remark.

“No thank you,” Your tone was clipped and he thankfully changed the channel.

“Yeah it’s a bit overplayed. What about Juno, it just started?” He shrugged

“Nah,” You said, sitting beside Hoseok laying against him and closing your eyes to push back tears you were overwhelmed.

“Animation numbness?” He asked, turning on your Disney plus you laid there without opening your eyes “anything?’

“Yes” He put on his favourite ‘Peter Pan’ and pulled you up to lay against his chest sensing you were not quite alright. He sang cutely in your ear along to ‘We’re following the leader’ with the children on the television.

You got to the part where Wendy sings ‘You’re mother and mine’ before the tears started to fall. Hoseok noticed the way your chest shook against his and sat up. “Hey Little Darling, tell me what is wrong.”

“Everything.” You sniffed burying your face into his chest and he patted your head threading his hand through your hair soothing the raging emotions.

“Tell me little darling,” He whispered softly, trying to calm you and give the support you need. “Is it about the doctors, are you sick, is something wrong?”

“No nothing, it’s fine,” The finality in your voice made him go quiet, of course he was upset but he respected your decision and just held you. “I think... I might go to bed.”

The abruptness of your decision made him sit up, “Are you sure, I can stay and I won’t pry”

“I really should sleep, this is something I have to figure out by myself and then I can talk to you okay,” You said standing and he nodded standing grabbing his coat and heading to the door. Before you could shut the door he turned pulling you into a hug. 

“I am here for you okay, don’t try to do it on your own, not when I am here and willing to help you, okay” he looked at you grabbing your shoulder and making sure your eyes would meet his before he continued “I will be by your side no matter what, trust me okay. I love you sleep well”

You would be lying if that I love you didn’t hit a little different, you nodded “Thank you Hoseok let me process and then we can talk okay.” Shutting and locking the door you began taking a few deep breaths. There was undeniable comfort from Hoseok’s words and it made you believe everything was okay. 

Taking out your phone with shaky hands you searched for a name you hadn’t contacted in a long time, even their name in your phone was mocking you. You clicked ‘Mum’ followed by the small phone icon before placing the phone to your ear.

Your hands trembling, you didn’t know what to do. You heard your mother answer with her familiar underlying snobbish greeting. 

“Good evening?”

“Hey Mum,” You caught yourself before your voice cracked, never giving your mother the satisfaction, “What are you doing?”

“Nothing, what do you need?” Her voice clipped and you bit your lip trying not to fight, this wasn’t why you were calling. You journeyed into the bathroom feeling a little sick, your mother always brought your anxiety back ten fold.

“Nothing, I was just wanting to tell you…” You squared your shoulders and stared at yourself in the mirror. It was a challenge, you were telling yourself to be a proverbial man. “I am pregnant.”

“Of course you are, you wasted your college degree by becoming a carny and now you are pregnant. I was waiting for you to stuff your life up more. And what now you need money, to help get rid of the thing, come home and we will take care of it. Maybe this will be a reminder to keep your legs shut”

“What the fuck is wrong with you, I am an adult don’t ever contact me again, because I sure as hell am never going to” You hung up placing your phone down and the sickness faded like a weight off your shoulders your mother was not a part of the equation.

Walking to the kitchen you sat on the breakfast bar stool and pulled out a book and began writing out a plan. There were things you needed to do. Of course telling Hoseok was important but you were planning without him. Because if he rejected you and this baby well then you were on your own.

It was always best to plan for the worst case scenario. A better house; the baby cannot live in a broken down high theft studio apartment. A drivers license; you definitely couldn’t take the child to school on the bus everyday before going to work and as for work you needed a serious job. You paused; these were the first important things.

Opening your laptop you began looking at houses and loans, saving tabs and looking at a driving school, there was no time to party. Texting Seokjin ideas he told you he would help you with some of the lessons and you were grateful that he would help you.

[Jimin: Hey, I thought...] [Jimin: And feel free to stop me but...] [Y/n: Spit it out Jiminie] [Jimin: I might have a better job for you, I just thought that the theme park would be too physical and at somepoint you won’t be able to lift and such.] [Y/n: Oh wow, I hadn’t thought about the lifting and standing business but I did think I would need more money and a real job, what do you have in mind?] [Jimin: You are qualified for it and it is a desk job, that pays well.]

You kind of felt good about everything, Jimin gave you an application for the desk job and depending on what you heard back you would have to give your two weeks notice at the theme park.

[Jin: As tomorrow is Saturday, How about your first driving lesson?] [Y/n: I mean sure, I have booked in to see the Realestate and I have filled out papers for a home loan, I can’t live here, it isn’t safe for a child.] [Jin: I will be there in the morning and I will drop off some healthy meals...] [Jin: I am slaving away in this kitchen so you better eat them.] [Jin: We don’t want the little one getting hungry, okay?] [Y/n: Okay, I get it. We will drive and look at houses tomorrow don’t be late] [Jin: I am never late.]

Seokjin was really getting into his role as fake father. But it made you feel like you had some sort of support behind you and that made you happy. You were exhausted laying on your single bed and decided not to dwell on things any more that evening. 

The next morning Seokjin knocked on your door, upon opening he looked at you with horrified eyes, “Your front door has been smashed in, why do you still live here?” He huffed placing bags on the bench, “you better understand that I love you, look at all these dinners I prepared”

“Thank you Jin, for everything, I really can’t thank you enough right now” You hugged him and he held you a little longer than normal perhaps waiting for you to break down.

“Are you ready to go?” Seokjin said, opening the front door to reveal Hoseok standing there looking absolutely confused.

“Go where?” His voice croaked a little evidence of his recent rising.

“We are looking at houses” You said nonchalantly, “Do you want to come?”

“Sure let me get dressed,” He ran back inside and Seokjin looked at you cautiously and you nodded. The three of you got into the car and Seokjin began instructing you to drive and you were doing pretty well even Hoseok who is scared of almost everything was calm.

You all spent the day looking and discussing houses and your price range and the possibility of a home loan, Hoseok just listened. He seemed amazed by the length you were going to, just to get a home or at least that’s what it felt like.

You looked at different houses and you knew which one you could afford but you couldn’t help but dream about one of the more expensive ones that they had accidentally showed you. Even Seokjin and Hoseok saw you smile when you looked at the places.

The last house you looked at was overrun with grass weeds and trees, garbage in the yard, a broken window and everything needed fixing but it was the cheapest.

The neighbourhood wasn’t bad, but the plumbing was, there was no electricity either which meant you had a lot of work cut out for you. Nothing could compare to your dream house, it had french doors to a back porch and a large backyard with a neat garden.

After inspecting each property you went back to the real estate office and stood outside in the fresh breeze while the agent made a few calls about your loan flexibility. Seokjin went to get coffee from the Cafe just down the road and to enter the real estate office when Hoseok grabbed your arm gently and blushed apologetically, “Hey can we talk just really quick?”

“Sure Hobi,” Your eyes scanned his sheepish form and he opened his mouth but quickly shut it, “What is it?”

“Is it about the break in, I can totally understand if it is, We can find a new place together, something nicer, and with more space in a better neighbourhood.” He looked flustered he wanted to express so much he was fumbling over his words, “Just I don’t want it to be cause of something else, I don’t want it to be about me, or something I have done”

“Hoseok, I have something to tell you,” Your heart was beating out of your chest, “I got some news from the doctor and well I have to get my life in order because this is serious Hoseok”

“Oh god!” He clutched you in his arms, “Don’t say you are dying, please anything but that, I can’t live without you”

“No Hobi, I am pregnant, I have to get my life in order, I can’t raise a baby in a broken studio eating tinned food, I need a proper job and house and…” He pulled back to look at you in a mix of shock and relief “I am scared, and alone”

“You are pregnant, like really pregnant?”

“Yes, and I am pretty much disowned too, so I have no help from home and have I said I was scared because I am shaking” You sniffed tears falling and he held you

"I will be there for you" He smiled, “We can get a house together and raise a baby. Wait. Who did this?” 

“I got you a smoothie cause you can’t have Coffee” Seokjin smiled handing a coffee to Hoseok and a smoothie for you. You saw Hoseok’s eyes slid to Seokjin and flick back to yours.

“Him?”

It looked like Hoseok was about to punch him when the Agent stepped out and guided us back into the office, I spoke with the bank and they said you are only eligible for the broken down bomb site of a home.

But amongst the deadly glares of Hoseok and the disappointment on Seokin’s face at the bank’s refusal to lend any more he went to speak. “What about if I add a Ten thousand dollar deposit?”

“No, No deposit I will take it. I have some time to fix it and I intend to.”

“You can’t live there, it is creepy.” Hoseok said

“I can and I will, I have to make a safe environment for a baby Hobi, I can’t sit around in our apartment and wait for someone to stab me in my sleep, I have fate in my hands and I am taking it” You walked into the realtors office and signed the forms, the house was now yours.

You sighed stepping out of the realtors and Seokjin said, “the boys and I will help you clean up”

“I can get some of the guys from work” Hoseok said, appearing more like he was trying to outdo Seokjin, instead of genuinely helping. Either way you were thankful for their help.

The clean up was going to be a huge task and you needed all the help you could get.

Tags: @brbkpop​​​ @take-u-2-an0ther-w0r1d​​​ @munchyn​​​ @unadulteratedlyunique​​​ @jinhitwhore​​​  @knjkitten​​

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[xxsanshinexx]

Midnight at the Local Denny’s

Characters: Chan x Reader

Genre: Fluff and a lil crack

Words: 2180

Summary: You always had the grave shift at the local Denny’s. And your coworker always decided to leave; so it was just you, empty chairs, and the smell of grease. That is until a rather good looking stranger comes in. ~

“Y/n, I’m running across the street! I need an energy drink or something!” Vernon, your coworker called as he sprinted out from the kitchen, chefs apron already replaced with a sloppy hoodie. The two of you were always stuck on the grave shift, not that you minded, but working with Vernon usually turned one sided very quickly. Especially since his best friend worked across the street at the same time.

“You literally get free drinks whenever you want here.” You grumbled, leaning against the counter, watching as he placed his hands on the door handle.

“And they all taste like ass!” He waved his hand in goodbye towards you as he flung open the door hazardly, “I’ll be back in fifteen don’t be too bored without me!”

You huffed as the door barely got the chance to chime before he was gone, “Piss-ass.”

Working the night shift at a Denny’s was not your ideal job. It was boring, often cold, and the people who walked in often looked like they hated the place as much as you did. But you at least we're making money as you sat on the disregarded barstool, counting the number of lights on the ceiling. You could have been doing a far worse job than the midnight Denny’s shift, but you couldn’t help but complain as you switched from counting lights to the counting the number of chair legs in the room.

You had gotten to your third round of counting, this time focused on the number of ketchup bottles in the room, when the bell signalling a customer went off. You knew it wasn’t Vernon immediately, despite him saying he would be back around this time, because once he left he usually wasn’t back until close to the end of his shift. This customer though, was a sight for sore eyes, with his blonde hair shoved in a beanie and his pretty eyes that held large, tired bags underneath them. He had almost an emo vibe about him but maybe that was just due to the endless amount of black he wore; nonetheless though, he was very good looking. Definitely not someone you would have expected to walk in on you 3 a.m. Denny’s shift.

“Just one?” You called as you straighten up from your spot on the counter, making his wandering eyes turn towards you.

“Yeah.. just me.” His voice was quiet but deep and you couldn’t help but smirk.

“Take the bar seat,” You gestured to the empty seat as you fumbled with the menu’s, though he looked like he already had an idea of what he wanted without them. “Anything I can get you started with?”

“The strongest coffee you have and the largest plate of fries your allowed to make.” The request made you blink once but then you nodded, almost in respect of the order. A good looking customer with odd midnight cravings? Your night just got ten times better.

“Odd combination but it’ll be out shortly…. Um?” You trailed off, wanting to address him by his name. It always felt weird to address a client by sir or ma’am when it was just the two of you in the shop, and most traditional respects had flown out the window after one a.m. striked.

“Chan and you are…?” He slid into the seat and tapped his fingers against the countertop instantly as his eyes followed you to the coffee maker.

“Y/n.” You answered as you fiddled with the machine, “Now why are you out at this hour?”

“You’re nosey.” He chucked and you shot him a glance as the machine began to spit out his drink.

“Sorry, i’ll stop prying if you want and just have the both of us sit in awkward silence regretting our life choices.” You grabbed a few creamers and brought the hot mug over to him, setting it down and going to get him the largest plate of fries you could- for business purposes only.

He raised a brow as he began to open the creamer containers you had brought, dumping them in one by one, “What makes you think I regret anything.”

“You’re in a Denny’s at three a.m. Chan, no one ends up here willingly.”

He laughs, raising the mug to his lips, “Well you got me there. I just needed to get out of the studio before I went insane.”

“Studio?” There were a lot of different kinds of studio; art, dance, music, and countless others- and most of the people who worked in them didn’t end up here.

“I’m a producer.” His answer peaked your interest, your eyebrows raising up as you cocked your head to the side while you set down the plate of fries. Vernon always made to many and stored them for later in the oven, so they were warm, overly salted and just perfect for a midnight meltdown.

“Pretty young for a producer,” You pointed out, earning a scof from him as he took another drink, “Now why were you going insane in the studio? Song to hard? Client to snobby?”

“The soundwaves weren’t matching up and then the pitches of the singers voice and the beat weren’t syncing- I blame it on the shitty software of the company- and then the WiFi decided to crash! On top of all that, the client’s artistic choices are complete bullshit! Heavy beats here, I want it to be a little bit techno but with a country vibe- like what the fuck is that supposed to mean! God, I would’ve broke something if I didn’t get out of there…” His cheeks flushed pink as you let out a little chuckle at his passionate rant and his eyes flicked down to his fingers fiddling with a fry. “I know you don’t really care, I just don’t want to let out all this on Jisung again. I almost made him cry last time.”

You grinned and leaned against the counter next to him, “Continue ranting all you want, it’s cute.”

“Cute? You think I’m cute?” He sounded almost speechless, jolting his head up with wide eyes and an open mouth.

“Sure thing,” Laughter bubbled out from you as you sent him a wink, enjoying the flirty vibe, “I don’t talk to every single stranger that comes in here.”

“Well,” His lips twisted into a grin and his tired eyes began to hold a little more light in them, “I’ll have to scratch off being called cute by a Denny’s worker at 3 a.m. off my bucket list.”

“Glad I could help fulfill your dreams.” You looked at his now empty mug and pushed yourself off the counter. “You want a milkshake too?”

“Why?” His head tilted to the side in a way that resembled a dog.

”Cause as cute as you are, you still look like shit.” You answered honestly, provoking a raucous, hearty laugh from him; the joyful feeling lingering in his features long after his laughter faded into the background.

”Thanks... I guess.” Lips quirked up in a smirk as he watched you move to the drink area, a feeling akin to elation surging through him, even if your words were somewhat mean, “I feel like it too.”

”Same.” The knowing grin on your face made him skin further into that feeling of glee, “Milkshakes on me, vanilla or strawberry?”

”No chocolate?”

”No some prick made us run out of it earlier today.” You rolled your eyes at the thought of Vernon, who stored himself away in the kitchen to eat all the chocolate ice cream in the building. You were never able to fathom how he hadn’t gotten fired yet. “Vanilla or strawberry?”

”Surprise me.” The roguish tone to his voice made a jolt go through you.

You made the shakes in quiet after that, taking your time to use as much as the ice cream s possible. It was a late night and you hadn’t ate yet, and you were sure Chan wouldn’t mind the extra pint, “You want chocolate sauce on it?”

“Hell yeah I do!” He cheered and you gave an amused expression, which he quickly looked away from, “and whip cream too please… if you can.”

“Don’t sound too excited over it,” You laughed and brought over your connoction, setting it down on the counter in an over exuberant way. “A Y/n milkshake, reserved for those of us who feel the shittiest.”

“I’ll drink to that.” He grinned, clinking the glass against the one in your hands and taking a drink.

You shook your head at his new childlike behavior, twirling your straw between your fingers, “You know it probably wasn’t wise to let you have a coffee and a milkshake this late.”

“My body and mind already hate me, so what’s one more bad decision going to do?” He shrugged and offered you the plate of disregarded fries, “French fry?”

“You dip your french fries in milkshakes?” You gingerly took on in your hand, raising your eyebrow at him.

“Yes because I’m a civilized human being.” He scoffed, setting the plate down and dipping a fry in the drink wasting no time in eating it afterwards.

“I’m sure you are, that’s why you’re here right now.” You followed suit, surprised a bit by the contrast of the fries saltiness and the ice cream. All in all though, it wasn’t half bad.

“Then why are you here right now?”

“Because I’m a civilized human being too,” You took another fry, munching on it now rather annoyed, “And life is expensive. Grave shifts pay a lot more than day shifts; and since my sleep schedule is already fucked, why not earn some more cash?”

“I felt that,” He nodded along, and by how evident his exhaustion was, you knew he actually sympathized with you, “I still have about two more hours of work to go.”

“I’m hearing you’ll need another coffee to go?” The grin that grew on his face made it almost impossible to fight the blood rushing to your cheeks.

“I think you’re just playing into my bad habits now.” He grabbed another fry except this time he dipped it in your drink because he already finished his own, not that you minded though. You just found it odd how the two of you were already so comfortable with each other despite being complete and utter strangers. “But yes, a coffee to go sounds lovely.”

“Don’t worry about the extra expenses, this one's on the house.”

He chuckled a little and shook his head, “Aren’t you going to get in trouble for all this stuff being “on the house”?”

“What the company doesn’t know, won’t hurt them.” You went to make him another coffee, going as far to put creamer and sweetner in it after noticing what a sweet tooth he had, “Plus I’m just gonna blame it on Vernon anyways, I’m pretty sure he ditched his shift for the store across the street.”

“That’s pretty shitty of him.” Chan frowned at your coworkers nature and you shrugged, entirely used to your grave shifts with Vernon.

“Eh he does it almost every shift I work with him… one of his friends works the graveyard shift across the way too. They just fuck around the whole time, running between here and there.”

“So what I’m hearing is, that maybe, I should stop by a little more often so I could help you fuck around with them.” His smile was impish and you couldn’t help but smile back in delight, at the implication that you would get to see him once again. You liked Chan, and not just due to his pretty face, but because you could talk to him so easily. It wasn’t often a stranger showed up and dipped his fries in your milkshake and you still let him live.

“I think that sounds like a wonderful idea.” said as you grabbed his check, taking your time to scribble down your number on the phone with a little heart next to it.

“Tomorrow night?” He pushed himself off the seat and walked up to you at the register.

“Thursday. I’m off for a few days.” You replied, handing him his coffee and check as he handed you some money for the humble food you had given him.

“Thursday at 3 a.m. it is than. I’ll consider it a date.” He grinned as he looked at the back of the paper, raising it up for you too see your sloppy handwriting.  “Really? What is this? A cliche fanfiction.”

“We’re literally in a Denny’s, flirting, well past midnight, you tell me.” He shook his head at you and walked towards the door, though he was never quite able to entirely face away from you.

“Fair enough,” The smile didn’t leave his face as he pushed open the door, the cold night air enveloping the warm atmosphere of the twenty four hour dinner,  “See you thursday Y/n.”

“Can’t wait, Chan.” Your voice was breathless as you watched him leave, a stupid grin on both of your faces.

[talesofhavekostca-blog]

OPERATION: STRAWBERRY PUSSY BLAST

Jack Burroughs

January, 3rd 2015

Havekost, CA

“Cuthbert The Carnivorous Cunt-Louse did it again.”, said Jake while opening the trunk of his warhorse, showing me the large bag of marijuana. It is a clear five-gallon garbage bag. Inside were smaller bags of weighed out weed. Anywhere from ounces to dime bags.

“My God, I’ve never seen so much weed in one place before.” I say before looking around the school parking lot,” How did you fit it into your car, Jake?”

“Easy, gumption and my ever-growing need to make that money, Jack”

“Yeah, but aren’t you super-rich?”

“Bitch I’m gonna be richer than that.” He laughs and hands me an ounce. “Here, this is for letting you leave the concert while you were tripping. I’m really sorry we lost you, man, but I ended up hooking up with twins. You know the Breenes?”

“Wait, aren’t they a brother and sister?”

“Jack, did you forget I was bi?”

I pause and go,” I guess it has been a while since I saw you making out with some jock.”

“Ahh yes, the good ole’ days. Anyway, while you were tripping balls with furries, I was getting it on. I’m, again, sorry Jesus and I lost track of you.”

I light up a cigarette and shrug, “So what if I lost my girlfriend and ended up stranded in a diner for several hours and was taped by the local news helicopter taking a piss in the woods while a furry orgy happened behind me. It’s cool that you let me walk off with a homeless man while you and Jesus did random shit.”

“You sound bitter, Jack.” He smiles and hands me another ounce. “Are you still grounded?”

“OF COURSE I AM, THIS JUST HAPPENED A WEEK AGO. My grandparents saw me on the news and now they think I like people in animal costumes! “

“Well...This is something you can tell your grandkids, at least.”

“...I guess.” I look at the weed in my hands and I open the bag and I smell it. “Oh my god. This smells amazing, what is this?”

“Oh, get this, it's called ‘Strawberry Pussy Blast’.”

“What? No way, that’s fucking great.” We laugh and I throw down my spent cigarette and we head to class. I hide the two ounces in my bag, which I then hide in my locker.

***

First-class of the day and its Mr. Perry’s Homeroom class and I’m doodling and everyone is still looking over and snickering at me. The kid next to me, Clarence, has his shirt over his nose due to my smoking and I feel bad as he’s nice but on the other hand I just want to tell him to quit being such a pussy.

Mr. Perry is sitting at his desk, reading a book about superheroes during the war. He thoughtfully strokes his beard and sips his coffee. He is my Arch-Nemesis. Well, besides Anxiety, Depression, my seeming forever-virginity and I guess my addiction to Shirley Temples.   I have pranked Perry so many times, as of this moment I have tied him to a chair, crashed his birthday party that his wife threw and kidnapped him for a better grade and we ended up bonding over history and goth music. He didn’t press charges because I accidentally helped him get out of a dinner with his in-laws, you know, because he was in my attic.

Jake is behind me doodling as well and I look over occasionally and I see that he’s drawing The Masked Avengement, who is some guy who’s running around the city, claiming he’s a superhero but apparently he’s been fighting random homeless people on video for money. His ‘sidekick’ Owly is even worse, I hear he sells PCP to girl scouts. These guys are our local legends and I’ve seen a kid dressed up as Owly, and I fucking laughed.

The intercom squelches and whines, “Jake Stone and Jack Burroughs, to the principal’s office. Jake Stone and Jack Burroughs, to the principal's office.” 

Perry looks up and makes eye contact with me and points to the door and I pull Jake’s arm for him to come with and he whines saying, “But I haven’t finished the crack pipe!”

***

 When we walk inside, The Principal is waiting for us. He looks grandfatherly, but like, the kind of grandfather that used to be a nazi and probably molests himself while dressed as a clown.  “Ah, gentlemen, I've been waiting for you. Please have a seat.” 

We do and after a few seconds, he gets up and opens the closet. He pulls out the five-gallon clear bag of weed Jake had in his car.

Oh shit.

“DID YOU BREAK INTO MY CAR?!”

“No, Bruce the security guard did after he saw you hand Mr. Burroughs some weed.” 

He opens the bag and takes out a dime bag and sits back down at his desk. He then opens a drawer and pulls out a bong that is shiny and orange. He fills it up with water and weed and takes a hit. He coughs while blowing out smoke. He then presses an intercom button and says, “Ms. Abner will you come in here. I have some chronic.” and she says, “Yes sir, right away.” and comes into the office and Ms. Abner looks like the kind of lady who’d play the organ at church, but badly, and would leave her estate to her cats. She takes a hit and coughs and she says “Oh, oh my.” and coughs some more and the Principal says “Quit being a bitch, Martha.” 

Jake and I are surprised and uncomfortable. He takes another hit and says, “This weed is so good, I might not expel you from school. Now listen clearly, you can keep the two ounces you have in your locker, Mr. Burroughs. You two have bought our new computer lab with this...donation if you will.”

“Wait, you’re selling weed for the school?” I say, still in shock.

“Well, we have to get funding somehow. So for the last decade, we take the weed stupid kids as yourself bring to school to sell and sell it ourselves. It's pretty brilliant. Wouldn’t you agree, Ms. Abner?”

“Yes, sir,” Ms.Abner says while opening a bag of Cheetos and eating some. Her eyes are red. 

“YOU BASTARDS WILL PAY!” Jake roars and I hold him back and The Principal just smiles and laughs and then asks, “Burroughs, what is this strain called?”

I tell him before leaving as I pull Jake away, “Strawberry Pussy Blast.”

I hear nothing but laughter as we walk away.

***

Jake and I are in front of the Principal’s house, the lights are off and I’m nervous and Jake is applying war paint on his face and I’m cold. Its 10PM and I’m not supposed to be outside. 

“What’s the gameplan, Jake?”

“We’re going to find dirt on this bastard, anything.”

We check the backdoor and its unlocked. We go inside and the house smells like old hard candy and cat litter and clown makeup. We search high and low but find nothing. I find old playboys, handcuffs, zip ties and superglue in a bag but that’s it.

Then we hear noises from the basement. Jake looks at me and I shrug and we walk to the door and the noises get louder and I can tell there are at least two people downstairs. 

We tiptoe down quietly and we hide behind old newspapers and a dresser, and from we are standing we can see the Principal in Mormon underwear, tied to a rack while Ms.Abner is dressed as a nazi, whipping him and I’m not even a little surprised.

Well, I’m surprised he doesn’t have makeup on.

Jake starts filming on his phone and Ms. Abner really goes to town on The Principal. She screams at him in German and he’s crying saying he’s been a good boy and after a particularly brutal slap, he pisses himself and I stifle a giggle.  Ms. Abner then grabs a bucket of ice-cream and pulls out a handful and rubs it all over the Principal’s face. He keeps screaming between bites and breaths, “Thank you, Mommy, thank you, Mommy. Gimme More.”

I fucking die at this point and Ms.Abner looks behind her and sees Jake and I. Ms. Abner faints and falls over and I laugh harder.

“What are you boys doing?!” The Principal is shocked and ashamed and is trying to get out of his ties but he’s stuck and helpless.

“Mr. Principal, I see we meet again. Now, I know you’re doing a good service. But you stole what is rightfully mine. If you don’t tell me where the weed is, I will ruin you. Do you understand?” Jake holds up his phone and plays the video. The Principal is crying and he keeps apologizing and says the weed is in the closet, by the clown costume. 

I FUCKING KNEW IT.

We grab the weed and leave him on the rack. Ms. Abner, still very much asleep and looking the most peaceful a woman dressed as a nazi can be, murmurs random things. We leave the house and Jake posts the video to the internet later. It goes viral on shock sites by the morning. The next day at class, we see that the Principal and Ms. Abner have been fired and everybody's watching the video and laughing.

Jake turns to me and says “Operation: Strawberry Pussy Blast was a success!” as we sit down in class. Perry looks up and looks at us and Jake winks and shoots him a few times with finger guns.

 No teacher bothers us again for the rest of the year.

[prsfood]

PARIS HABITS

carry around bottled of diluted juice, choose a strongly flavored one OR water with 0% syrup off brand U (about 6 for a lot of syrup).

unsuspicious:

Broth-based soups (chicken/veggie/beef broth, not cream) and plain popcorn come to mind...shrimp is also very low cal and high protein.

What really confuses my family is when i take out my ice cream sandwich. Little do they know, its a klondike 100 calorie light bar, but it looks like a regular ice cream bar so it doesn't raise suspicion.

cooked veggies with shrimp

Thing I always do is an eggwhite omelette with celery and tuna. My fam says its gross cuz of the two mixed but you only need like 3 eggwhites, maybe a half can of tuna and a bit of chopped up celery. Makes a lot for low cal!

I always go for like 5 saltine crackers and a laughing cow cheese wedge

I got kelp noodles recently - the entire bag is 18 calories. They're clear and can be served cold or hot. Mostly good for Asian foods and salads.

I make egg and cheese wraps for dinner..the whole thing comes to around 200 cals as a meal...1 tortilla, 1 small egg and like, a slice of low fat cheese...it also makes me feel full which is good, esp. when paired with coffee

shrimp. Went out to all you can eat crabs with my friends tonight (ugh, shoot me). While they were pigging out on 5000+ cals of crabs, I was just peelin' my shrimp super slow and eating about 100 cals of shrimp, which took forever and made me look sups normal. Even the cocktail sauce doesn't have that many cals and it is delish

at school for lunch I have a half of a pb sandwich. it's 40 cal bread with pb2 (around 30 cal because I don't use the whole 2 tbsp) so that equals 70 cal. I have it with some fruit (50 cal) and cucumber or celery (0 cal)

My caramel frozen yogurt bars are only 100 calories and are a great dessert, especially around people.

My suggestions are:

Try having silken tofu instead of hard tofu because people don't tend to differentiate between different varieties of the same foods even though they can have substantially different caloires. I don't know where you live but here in Australia the Macro silken tofu is only 50 calories for 100g while hard tofu is over 100 calories or more for the same amount.

Home made ice blocks/popsicles with diet drinks and fruit (I mentioned this recently on a different forum, I'm not steal, promise!!!)

Instead of steaming veggies roast them - ie 'carrot fries', because they have that association with fries even though they are low cal

It's already been said by rice cakes (You can find 10cm diameter ones for 23 calories) and you can top them up with salads and hummus etc.

Low calorie smoothies ie. Made with just frozen fruit, ice and water

1 cup silk unsweetened almond milk with sweetener and fiber one 80 cal cereal. 110 cal.

two slices 45 or 40 cal bread with Turkey breast, tomato, kraft fat free mayo. 150-160 cal.

two slices 45 or 40 cal bread with two tbsp pb2 & 1 tbsp smuckers sugar free jelly. 135-145 cal.

Pickles are a great go-to zero calorie food when I crave something salty. That or 100 calorie microwave popcorn. If you make it in an air popper, though, and only spray a little I Can't Believe It's Not Butter on it then its even less (depending on serving size of course). You can add a little salt too, or No-Salt (Potassium Chloride) if you're watching sodium its a great alternative.

Also love the zero sugar/zero calorie energy drinks from Monster or Rockstar. Gets me through the day if my energy wanes. The V8 flavored green tea energy drinks are good too and 50 calories if you only need a little boost.

Jennie-O makes a ground turkey that is like 97% fat free. Less calories and fat than ground beef but still high in protein.

Turkey bacon is like 25 calories per slice that you can pair with egg whites (also about 25 calories per serving).

Hebrew National makes a hot dog that is like 98% fat free and only 45 calories each (versus like 200 for regular hot dogs dripping in saturated fat.. blegh).

And finally, one of my favorite desserts when I need something sweet is fresh strawberries sprinkled with Truvia (zero calorie sweetener) and it is delish!

i go to subway and get a 6 inch veggie delight with all veggies, no cheese and yellow mustard

it's 230 calories but it's really filling and normal looking lol

Bare naked noodles? 16 cals a pack but I can get 2/3 sevings from it with raw shaved courgettes <3 and a stock cube about 30 cals altogether!

shredded crab sticks kani kama like pasta its like: 40 cals crab+20cals lettuce= 60 cals of a full plate

I love low cal bread (35 cal per slice!) with apple butter on top. (30 cal for 2 TBSP). I usually like to eat all of my food in one meal so I like to side it with either no fat plain Greek yogurt (tastes like heaven if you add sweetener and cinnamon) or plain oatmeal with, again, sweetener and cinnamon.

salads, for obvious reasons! lots of veggies

wraps. get a good brand of low cal tortillas, and maybe a spread you like (salsa has always been my favorite)

rice (mix it with lots of veggies for a stir fry)

Salad wraps. What's great about tortillas and pitas, is no one can really see what you've stuffed in there. So use it like a hidey-hole and just fill with vegetables.

I do meat and veggie dishes that are mostly veggies. Like string bean chicken and beef with broccoli. It sounds like a "real" meal but I mostly only serve myself the vegetable part!

Make a huge Asian like bean sprout "stir fry" (I just cook it with water) and season it up as you want, you can add a few shrimp and they're only 7 cals each

Sauerkraut! You can eat a ton and it's super low cal

A big salad with a fewwww grilled chicken strips

If you don't fear carbs, there's a few breads that are 45 cals a slice, you could make a veggie sandwich with a couple of slices and it'd only be a lil over 100 cals

Tuna salad. More veggies than tuna, skip the mayo. Even saltines are not terribly high cal.

Believe it or not, a baked potato.  This is one of my fav dinners: a large baked potato with salsa and guacamole and a big salad.  Most people (no doubt your mum as well) know to look past salad because it has next to no calories, even by the bucketful.

But potatoes are considered indulgent foods.  Turns out tho, it is all the crap people put on them (sour cream, bacon bits, CHILI for gods sake!) or cook them in (think french fries or crisps) that is bad.  You can top a potato with salsa (lots) and guac (a little but positioned to look as big as possible) and, when paired with a salad, looks like a giant plate of food.  If you start to feel like you are over-ful (a real possibility with this meal) you can skip eating the potato skin, which most people leave off anyways so it won't look suspicious.

Aubergine or courgette boats! Stuff with mushrooms/spinach/chickpeas/Quorn mince or whatever, top with some bread crumbs and/or cheese.

This is the best thing for anyone!

400g cauliflower with some water in a blender - blend till Mashed potato consistency, it makes soooo much! About half a large plate piled! And only 100 calories, then you can add whatever you like since you have so many cals left over. And simply adding rosemary and pepper is delicious!

If you want it to look more like a dinner meal add something like

Chicken thigh - 200

Salmon - 255

Hoki Fish - 175

Stuffed mushrooms

4 medium size or 2 HUGE portobello mushrooms (would be in the 250-300g region, so 30-40 cals)

Bake in the oven for 15 mins.

Top with 1/2 can of lentils (113) mixed with 3 laughing cow triangles (105 or 75 if using the light version) (you could also use another soft cheese). Add in herbs and spices (garlic is great with this) and bake for another 10-15 mins. You could even add a bit of proper grated cheddar or mozzarella as well to make it seem even more high calorie. Wouldn't be more than 300 even with the addition of full-fat cheese.

Grated cauliflower looks like rice with a lot less cals.

Soups with a ton of broth.

[hannah-deserved-better]

Angel’s Day Out Ch.3

When they arrived at the restaurant, Hannah gazed around at the quiet neighborhood lined with simple brick buildings. Finely dressed men and women wandered the streets around them. Hannah glanced at Castiel as he parked the car and met her gaze.

 “Are you sure we should be clothed so… strangely?” she asked. They’d taken the time to change into clothing that had been approved by the Winchesters. In fact, according to Castiel, their entire excursion had been planned by the brothers.

 “Yes,” Castiel said as he got out of the car and moved around to open the passenger door for her. “I don’t quite understand it either, but Dean informed me that we would not be allowed entry to this restaurant if we were dressed like douchebags, as he called it. He said we had to look sharp.”

 Hannah felt confused. “Sharp?” she repeated. “Like a blade?” She looked down at herself. She wore a slimming black dress with a short hemline, square neckline, and thin spaghetti straps crisscrossing her bare back. Her hair was pulled back from her shoulders, spilling in wavy tresses against her back. She wore a light blue pendant that Sam had said brought out her eyes.

 Castiel offered her his hand and, hesitantly, she took it, and he hoisted her to her feet. “Do I look sharp then? Sam Winchester claimed this was appropriate.” Castiel looked at what she wore, his eyes studying her slim form closely.

 “Yes,” he responded. She felt her cheeks turn a little warm as she took in his appearance. He wore a dark navy blue tuxedo with coat and white dress shirt. His appearance certainly made her vessel flush slightly; she didn’t quite understand this sort of reaction. “You look smashing.”

 Hannah hoped that smashing was a good thing. But when she tried to walk in the uncomfortable high heels Sam told her to wear, she stumbled forward, losing her balance. Castiel was there, quickly catching her by the arms before she collided into him, and held her steady. “Are you alright?” he questioned.

 “These shoes,” she glanced down at her feet, at the black high heels she wore, and how her feet screamed with discomfort at being in them. “I don’t see how they are appropriate.”

 Castiel glanced around at the people moving back and forth around them. He pointed out a woman in a flashy red skirt and six-inch pumps. Hannah felt a little better about her appearance. She felt as though this black gown hardly contained her form, but at least it wasn’t that revealing.

 “Come on,” Castiel grasped her hand and let her lean slightly against him as they walked to the restaurant. Hannah still struggled with the shoes and felt a little embarrassed as she enlisted the look of a few humans standing in the waiting lounge as she and Castiel approached the hostess podium.

 “Welcome to the finest Kansas City Steakhouse in town,” the hostess greeted as she looked the two of them over. “Well aren’t you two a pair of perfect cherubs.” Castiel and Hannah exchanged glances with one another.

 “Yes, we are angels,” Castiel pointed out as a matter of factly. “But I don’t understand how you could have known that simply based on our appearance. You cannot see our true form.”

 “Oh… just a figure of speech, Handsome,” the hostess said, winking coyly at Castiel. “Do you have a reservation?”

 Castiel nodded. “Yes, I have a reservation under Dean Winchester.” The hostess checked her computer and pulled out a few menus.

 “Ah there you are, Mr. Winchester, I’m glad you called ahead, we have your table and your entire menu selection all ready for you.”

 Castiel raised a brow and looked at Hannah who shrugged. He leaned over to her to whisper. “Now I know what Dean was doing in the other room before we left,” he said. Hannah felt a little nervous. She didn’t entirely trust Dean and knowing he’d apparently set this whole event up made her even more anxious about what could be in store for them.

 The two of them followed the hostess through the dimly lit dining room, and Hannah glanced around the restaurant curiously. People stuffed into booths lined the room, talking, taking little note of them. Paintings of prominent Kansas City residents and of scenery decorated the walls. Jazz music played. As they passed by the bar lounge area, Hannah was fascinated with the bottles and glasses lining the wall behind the bar.

 When they approached their booth, it was decorated with a white satin tablecloth, set up with proper plates and utensils, and upon closer inspection, Hannah noted a long-stemmed red rose laying in front of the antique lamp at the far end of the table, just under the large oil painting of the Missouri River hanging on the wall.

 Hannah plucked the rose from the table as she slid into the booth, Castiel sitting down across the table from her. She looked it over curiously, inhaling its pleasant floral scent. When she glanced to Castiel for an explanation, he only shrugged. “Dean,” he said simply.

The hostess left them and was immediately replaced by a pretty brunette waitress whose name tag read: Dina.

 “How are we doing this lovely evening?” Dina asked as she placed water glasses in front of each of them. She glanced at Castiel. “You’re Dean Winchester, correct?”

 “No,” Castiel corrected, he tried to think of an explanation. “He’s uh… my brother. He arranged this meal for us.”

 “Oh well aren’t you two in for a surprise then,” the waitress pulled over a tray and placed champagne ice bucket onto their table. “He’s arranged the full tour of our fine establishment. First, we have some champagne on ice, followed by a couple of dishes to share. Our delicious crab cakes, some parmesan truffle fries, and lobster mac and cheese. Then, we have a dry aged Kansas City rubbed porterhouse on a bed of wild rice with sauteed spinach and a baked potato. And for the lovely lady here, we have a roasted citrus salmon over polenta and creamed spinach and sauteed wild mushrooms. And then for dessert, we have some strawberry sorbet for the both of you.”

 The waitress glanced between the two of them and smirked. “You two are as thin as rails, you sure you can finish all that food?”

 “Yes,” Hannah said confidently, glancing up at the waitress. “We are ang-”

 “We’re very hungry,” Castiel blurted out before she could finish her sentence. The waitress smiled.

 Hannah gasped as the waitress popped the cork, the noise startling her, as did the eruption of fizzing champagne that burst from the bottle. The waitress expertly poured them their glasses and then hurried away.

 Hannah focused her attention on Castiel, who gave her a small smile. “What have you observed of humans so far?” he asked her.

 Hannah glanced down at the rose she held in her hand, running her finger over the stem and the petals, feeling the softness sensations of touch as she thought. “They place a lot of value on these… sensations,” she responded. “Senses. The way we are dressed, how we appear. The sound of the piano… the touch of a rose. These smells around me…”

 “Humans use their senses to process the world around them,” Castiel explained. “How do these senses make you feel, Hannah?”

 Hannah thought about that question. As she did, the waitress brought the first of their food. Crab cakes and fries. She took a fry and ate it cautiously and watched Castiel do the same. As she chewed, she contemplated the tastes. “I like this,” she said. She thought back to how she’d felt as she’d taken in Castiel’s appearance in his suit and the way she’d felt a little flushed when she noticed his eyes on her. She’d felt encouraged by his attention. She liked the way the rose felt, the way her mouth watered at the smell of food, and the crunch and salty taste of the fries and crab cakes.

 “I like the way these senses make my vessel feel,” she told Castiel. As curious as she was about the world around her, she also liked that Castiel was here with her. She realized that his presence was probably the most essential part of the way she felt. She wasn’t quite sure how to tell him this. Somehow, it didn’t quite feel right to voice these thoughts. She didn’t understand how to put words to what she felt. She only knew that she didn’t want the evening to end.

 And it was long-lasting. With each new dish their waitress brought them, she was given a chance to experience something new. New tastes, new smells. And even though this was all new to her, somewhere, deep inside her, Caroline felt them too and assured her that they were right things to feel. After all, they were Caroline’s emotions, her senses, which guided her.

 All through dinner, she kept the rose on her lap, it seemed wrong to part with it somehow. She watched Castiel intensely as he ate his meal. She followed his lead on how to eat certain things, though Caroline nudged her in the right direction too.

 The dinner did have to end eventually, and after Castiel paid for the meal on one of Dean’s fraudulent credit cards, the two of them made their way back to the car and as Hannah sat in the passenger seat, watching as Castiel pumped gas, preparing for their journey west, she suddenly felt closer to him than she thought was possible before. She clutched her rose as he perched on the hood of the car outside, waiting for the gas pump to finish, she felt an overwhelming sensation of anticipation for the next few days. She was excited to explore the world with him, to see what he wanted to show her, to let him guide her through this strange planet.

When he got back into the car, he glanced across the space between them to meet her gaze. “How was that?” he asked, concern for her answer in his eyes as he observed her expression. “The whole evening. Even the uncomfortable shoes.”

“I liked it,” she admitted softly. “Castiel… I hadn’t realized.”

“Realized what?”

“I didn’t see how there could be any wisdom to be gained by humans. So much of the way they act confuses me. They don’t understand what it’s like to be angels, but… I’m starting to realize what you see in them.”

Castiel smiled wholeheartedly, relief in his eyes. “I’m glad,” he said. “And there is much more to come.”

And with that, the two angels headed west.

[choicest-fics]

Date Night

Date night was absurd. It wasn’t any different than the normal things they did. It wasn’t as if they could go out in public and be together the way they wanted to. But Saeran humored Saeyoung, it made him happy, even if it made Saeran grumpy. He finished getting dressed, looking at himself in the mirror. He felt ridiculous. He wore a soft pink dress shirt, Saeyoung said it accentuated his mint green eyes. He brushed his unruly hair, but eventually gave up. He strapped his black collar on and put his eyeliner on. He contemplated redoing his nails, but decided against it. He didn’t have time to let them dry.

There was a soft knock on his door and Saeran rolled his eyes. He opened it and Saeyoung stood there in a formfitting burgundy dress, his red wig on, glasses gone. His amber eyes were bright and excited.

Saeran snorted.

Saeyoung’s face fell.

“Oh, hey, no, you look beautiful.” He stroked Saeyoung’s cheek and stepped up to him, taking him in his arms and kissing him gently. Saeyoung’s smile came right back, along with his excitement.

“You look really handsome too, I love that color on you.” Saeyoung brushed imaginary lint off Saeran’s shoulders.

“I know, that’s why I wore it.”

Saeyoung’s eyes lit up and he stole another kiss before holding his arm out for Saeran.

“I think I’m the one that has to do that.” Saeran teased.

“Don’t make this about gender!” Saeyoung fumed, grabbing Saeran’s arm and leading him towards the dining room. Saeran laughed and allowed himself to be led by his erratic and genderbending brother.

Saeyoung practically dragged Saeran down the hall, he threw open the door dramatically. “Ta Da!” he exclaimed and stepped aside to let Saeran in.

Saeran stepped inside and his eyes went wide. When had Saeyoung had time for this? There was a fancy red tablecloth on the small table, candles burning in candle holders, china plates set out and crystal goblets. There was a six pack of Dr. Peppers in a silver ice bucket, and a crystal bowl full of honey buddha chips. The silverware was real silver and gleamed in the firelight. On a silver tray sat Big Macs and fries, there was also a single box of a 10 piece McNuggets. The chairs were covered in a silky red cloth and pink fabric napkins placed under the silverware.

Saeyoung had put up streamers and balloons, which did not match the fancy table, but made the room look festive and carefree.

“Do you like it?” Saeyoung asked. He bit his lips and clasped his hands together. He began to chew his lip nervously. He knew it was silly, but, he had wanted it to feel like a real restaurant. Ok, maybe he had overdone it with the streamers and balloons, making it look more like a birthday party than a romantic dinner date.

Saeran turned to him, his jaw on the ground. He hugged Saeyoung and whispered in his ear, “I love it. But, I don’t see any ice cream.” He complained. Saeyoung cupped Saeran’s face and kissed his nose.

“It’s in the freezer silly. Eat your food first.” He took Saeran’s hand and pulled out a chair for him. Saeran sat and Saeyoung plopped himself on his lap. “I’ll feed you.” He said with a giggle.

“Can you even see? Where are your glasses?” Saeran asked, one hand on Saeyoung’s lower back, the other on his thigh. He slid his hand up and down Saeyoung’s back, realizing easily that he was not wearing any underwear. His cock began to stir, but he tamped down his excitement, date night first, or he would never hear the end of it.

“I can see just fine, thank you very much!” Saeyoung scoffed then poured the fries onto the crystal plate. “Do you prefer a burger or the nuggets?” he asked seriously.

“Hmmm, nuggets please.” Saeran grinned.

“What kind of sauce? I have BBQ, Ranch, Chipotle, ketchup…” he arched his eyebrows, waiting for an answer.

“BBQ please, and ketchup for the fries.”

“Excellent choice!” Saeyoung’s movements grazed against his semi hard cock and it was making Saeran sweat.

Before long, Saeyoung dipped a nugget into the sauce and brought it to Saeran’s lips. He waited for him to open his mouth and he placed it in far enough for Saeran to bite it. He had a half smile on his face as he watched Saeran chew the tasty meat. Before he could swallow, Saeyoung leaned in and kissed his glistening lips. Damn, he needed more self-control. He wanted this night to go off smoothly. He pulled back reluctantly, but it was difficult not to lean in again when Saeran groaned in disappointment, his tongue running along his bottom lip. He could feel that Saeran was having the same difficulty between his legs. Maybe he should sit on his own chair. Nah!

He fed Saeran and Saeran fed him, holding a burger up to his lips and watching him take a large bite, his cheeks expanding to accommodate the chunk. They giggled and snorted, washing down their greasy fare with Dr. Peppers drunk from the crystal goblets.

“Where did you even get all of this?” Saeran asked, knowing that although his brother could probably afford it all, he wasn’t the type to spend money on these things. Gadgets and cars, yes, but not tableware.

“Jumin let me borrow them.” Saeyoung said too fast. Saeran’s eyebrows furrowed and his eyes narrowed.

“Did he now?”

“Mmhhm.” Saeyoung took a long drink from his glass.

“Saeyoung, did you break into Jumin’s apartment and steal all this?”

“I would never! How dare you accuse me of…” he stopped and bit his lower lip at Saeran’s look, “Maybe…I’ll put it back! It’s not as if he’s going to miss it! He never entertains!” Saeyoung pouted.

Saeran laughed, he didn’t really care, but one of these days Jumin was going to catch Saeyoung and he was not going to be nice. Of course, he wouldn’t blame Jumin, Saeyoung would just have to live with the consequences. How the hell had he gotten into Jumin’s apartment anyway? There were security guards posted at the door and the lobby and they all had pictures of Saeyoung. He shook his head, he didn’t want to know.

Instead he asked, “Can we have ice cream now?” Saeyoung’s eyes lit up. He jumped off Saeran and dragged him to the kitchen. He took out two tubs and two spoons then ran down the hallway. Saeran was confused. Saeyoung’s head popped around the corner, “Follow me!” he yelled. Saeran huffed but followed his brother, he did not go back into the dining room. He went straight to his room. Saeran was confused but he followed him anyway. He had set down the tubs on the dresser and was unzipping his dress, or trying to. Saeran replaced his hands, brushing his long hair over his shoulder and unzipped him, pushing the sleeve off his shoulder and kissing the freckled skin. Saeyoung sighed and leaned back into his brother.

They let the dress fall and Saeran realized he’d been right, Saeyoung was not wearing any underwear, but he was wearing stockings that attached to lacy white garters around his thighs. Damn, he looked tastier than the ice cream.

Saeyoung turned to him and pushed him away. “Your turn.” Saeran looked at him confused. Saeyoung opened the tubs and stuck a spoon into the strawberry ice cream and licked the spoon clean as he watched his brother. He pointed at him with the spoon. “Strip! We’re having naked ice cream.” Saeyoung beamed. Saeran rolled his eyes but complied. Once he was naked he grabbed the other spoon and dipped it into the mint chocolate chip tub. He savored the cold dessert on his tongue and hummed appreciatively.

Saeyoung took his spoon and flung the strawberry ice cream on Saeran’s chest. Saeran gasped and his eyes flew wide. Before he could complain, Saeyoung was licking it off his skin. The mixture of the cold ice cream and Saeyoung’s hot tongue was intoxicating.

“Yum.” Saeyoung exclaimed.

“Was that tasty?” Saeran grinned at his brother. Saeyoung put the spoon in his mouth and sucked on it, nodding suggestively at Saeran.

Saeran scooped out more ice cream and spread it on his hardening cock. He gasped at the coldness, but it did not affect his erection in the least. Saeyoung’s eyes gleamed, he took off the wig and knelt in front of Saeran. Keeping his eyes on his brother’s mint green ones, he licked his cock like a popsicle, completely missing the ice cream. He grinned at Saeran as he took him in his mouth, gobbling him and the ice cream up slowly and sensuously. His hands were on Saeran’s thighs and he dug his fingers into the soft flesh. Saeran fisted a chunck of Saeyoung’s hair and yanked on it gently. Saeyoung hummed, making Saeran’s cock vibrate.

“Fuck Saeyoung!”

“Mmm.” Saeyoung popped his cock out of his mouth and looked up at Saeran. “More!” he ordered. Saeran panted and grabbed another scoop of ice cream. He slid it into his mouth and sucked it off the spoon. Saeyoung’s eyes devoured the sight, his nails leaving crescent moons on Saeran’s light skin, angry and red.

Another scoop hovered over Saeyoung’s mouth and he opened it, Saeran let the dollop plop off the spoon, Saeyoung catching it and immediately taking him back into his mouth. The cold ice cream hit Saeran’s tip and he shivered, needing to lean against the dresser to hold himself up.

“Hhhaahhhh!” Saeyoung swirled his tongue around his cock, coating it with the still cool ice cream. Saeran felt as if there was steam coming off his skin. Saeyoung moved his hands around Saeran and grasped his ass. He sucked and licked Saeran’s cock, increasing the pressure with each bob. Saeyoung was loud, enjoying the taste of his brother and the ice cream. His moans vibrated through Saeran’s body. When he felt that Saeran was close, he dropped him.

“Hnngghh! Fuck! Saeyoung! You ass! Finish me!” Saeran shoved Saeyoung’s face into his cock but Saeyoung didn’t continue. Saeran tossed him aside and turned away from him. Digging into the ice cream in frustration. Saeyoung laughed and stood up, wrapping his arms around his brother. He lay his cheek on Saeran’s shoulders and hummed contentedly.

“You suck.” Saeran stated.

“And you love it.” Saeyoung added.

“Yes, I do, so why did you stop?” Saeran complained.

“I wanted more ice cream.” Saeyoung replied, grabbing his spoon and taking another scoop.

Saeran turned towards his brother, his mint green eyes softening, his mouth in an easy smile. He pulled him into a hug and began to nibble on his neck, then he bit the flesh, eliciting a gasp and pleasurable whine from Saeyoung. “Do you know what I want more than ice cream?” Saeran asked against his taught skin, his lips still cool from the ice cream.

“What?” Saeyoung breathed, his chest rising and falling, goosebumps spreading throughout his body.

“For you to fuck me.” Saeran whispered in Saeyoung’s ear, biting the lobe and stretching it out till it plopped out of his mouth.

Saeyoung grinned, a lustful look in his eyes, he tossed the spoon over his shoulder and he pushed Saeran onto the bed, smacking his ass and grabbing the flesh greedily.

“Your wish is my command!” Saeyoung crooned and stepped onto the bed. He grabbed the lube on the nightstand and began to prepare Saeran for entry. His fingers flashed in and out of Saeran’s ass and he was rewarded with a delicious string of expletives and moans. Saeran cussed up a storm during sex. The more he cussed, the cruder he got, the better he felt.

“Ahh, yes! Fuck Sae….Ahh, shit, hrmmm…” Saeran dug his nails into the bed. Saeyoung sped up his pumping, adding a third finger, he cocked his fingertips causing Saeran to scream, throwing his head back, arching his back and panting rapidly.

“Haahhh!! Son of a BITCH! FUCK! God Damn it! Shit Shit Shit! I want your cock in me! I want it now! Fuck Sae…UHHH…You motherfucking TEASE! I hate you! Fuck you! FUCK YOU!” he grabbed a pillow and bit into it, gnashing his teeth and growling.

Saeyoung slipped his digits out, Saeran’s rant making his cock itch to fill his brother up. He rammed himself into Saeran, slamming his cock inside him all the way to his base.

“Hahhh! Hmmm!” Saeyoung groaned, vocalizing his pleasure loudly.

Saeran’s breath seized at the moment of Saeyoung’s entry. His asshole burned with the full thrust, but suddenly his brain felt fuzzy and his body was experiencing an electric shock. He pushed his ass against Saeyoung, relishing his brother’s erotic vocals.

“Fuck Me! Fuck ME HARD! Fucking FUCK ME! SHIT! AHHHH! YESS!” Saeran was rendered into a babbling incoherent mess. He reached for his cock and began to stroke himself. He wanted to cum with his brother and he could tell he was close.

Sweat was dripping from his thick locks and he had to drop down on his elbow, his arm beginning to wobble.

“Ahh! YES!” Saeyoung came, releasing his hot stream into Saeran and feeling it drip down his thighs. He kept pumping until his cock was empty, his body shuddering with his orgasm. He felt his brother’s body convulse beneath him and knew he’d cum too. They both collapsed, exhausted.

“Where’s my ice cream?” Saeran sighed, shifting under Saeyoung. Saeyoung chuckled but scooted off Saeran. He grabbed a dirty t-shirt and cleaned himself off, he tossed it to Saeran so he could do the same. He picked up the tubs, the ice cream was a lot softer now, and the one spoon, they would have to share. He scooted next to Saeran, who was now sitting against the headboard. He put the tubs down between them and they took turns feeding each other. There was a lot of cool kisses in between.

Saeran had to admit, this date night hadn’t been so bad.

[williameshleman-blog]

Lisa Cannon in Italy: “The weather, the history, the culture, the romantic language, the food and the wine! It’s never beaten in my books and for something like a birthday celebration I didn’t want to have to travel too far.”

I am a lover of Italy and all things Italian. I can’t speak the language but the country speaks to me and somehow, somewhere I was meant to live there indefinitely or perhaps only for 5 days! That’s exactly what I do; when I can I steal away a mini break or a week I fly over to Italy and indulge! And what better way to spend it than in Capri. If you’ve never been you should take a peek, it’s like a secret you should know about. It’s a tiny island on the Bay of Naples surrounded by lavish shops to tiny cafes, incredible restaurants and the most stunning electric blue views your eye can see. From the cove-studded coastline to the yachts and celebrities, it really is magnificent! If you ever wanted the chance to catch Beyonce, Tom Cruise, Spielberg or any A-lister, Capri is the spot, they come in their droves and since the island is so small you are bound to spot one.

On arrival we were greeted by a gold yacht moored on the harbour, coming in at a mere snip of 45 million. We were told it belonged to Dolce & Gabbana – indeed, who else! That’s the level of Capri, it’s out of all of our leagues but we can still enjoy, embrace and experience a slice of the high life!

I adore Italy for one other very important reason. I got married in Florence in 2015 which all you weddingsonline readers will possibly already know as I could talk to you of nothing else for a year! [Read all about that right over here] This time we packed our bags and decided we’d try Capri, Anacapri and Sorrento and stayed in some of the most beautiful hotels on the coast which, I’ll share with you. So, after we landed in the port of Capri we were greeted on the jetty by a friendly staff member of the JK Capri who drove us all the way up the steep cliffside to the JK Capri Hotel. This is one of the most beautiful hotels I’ve ever seen and when I walked onto the terrace I could have cried the views were so incredible, it took my breath away- Bellissimo! We were shown around the hotel and I have to say the decor is one of the most beautiful I’ve ever seen, I couldn’t stop taking pictures. It’s the elegance of the art and architecture of the hotel that is magnificent. It oozes luxury and style and from the mini library to the cinema room and the terrace, you’ll never want to leave. To me JK Capri is an aspirational hotel, it’s for someone who wants to be spoilt and do it in complete luxury. The JK attracts major movie stars from Jennifer Aniston to Bradley Cooper who were all pictured there last year sipping their cocktails on the veranda.

The decor is minimalist but with a Hamptons style twist, beds that are so comfortable you’ll want to smuggle them home and staff that make the experience one in a million. Richard and I enjoyed the delicious food and aperitifs on offer and warmed to the personal service which can only be described as one of a kind.

I picked the hotel as we got married in Florence and they have a sister hotel there (JK Florence) where we had a soiree the night before our wedding, 100 guests on the Santa Maria Novella Square. I know how amazing the JK group look after their guests so it was a no-brainer to head to Capri and get spoilt. It’s amazing to see some of the staff that worked at our wedding three years ago there and now that I’m a friend of the JK group, we got some added birthday attention with champagne on arrival and strawberries dipped in chocolate. The hotel is discreet elegance and this 19th century Villa with its 22 rooms could become home very quickly if you let it!

It was amazing to see how similar yet how different it is going to Florence and then to Capri. We took time to lounge by the pool and get a boat to the blue grotto and surrounding islands. It was magical. We did our best to walk the cobbled streets, shop, buy lovely ice-cream, sightsee and relax. We managed to get to AnaCapri also and stayed in the fabulous Hotel Caesar Augustus which overlooked the whole of Capri. It was at the highest point right on the cliff edge – stunning! It was unreal to be that high up and see all the views and the staff were so lovely. Especially the owner Francesco who gave me a beautiful white rose when we arrived, as he knew it was a birthday celebration – a touch of class! The hotel is a little more relaxed and old world charm than that of JK Capri. I adored it and for me with all the stunning art, the classic Steinway piano in the room, the friendly staff and the classic sumptuous rooms made this Realise and Chateaux hotel stand out from the crowd. I loved the sense of family. The hotel is owned by Francesco’s father and we heard so many wonderful stories of this family hotel and how many famous and fabulous people have stayed there. The views at Hotel Caesar Augustus are probably one of the best in the world and it’s as though heaven meets the sea and then some more. I challenge anyone to find more beautiful settings. I know you can say the Maldives and the Caribbean and other far flung destinations, but the Amalfi Coast and especially Capri and that of the bay of Naples is very special. For only a 3 hour flight from Dublin you can have a slice of Italian beauty created by the divine right at your fingertips. The one thing that I noticed at the hotel was the little cute walkways and organic garden that makes this property unique. As you look past the infinity pool you see bursts of beautiful local art that adorn the terrace, I took many photos of all the artwork and swore that when I came into my millions I would buy some. It all looked so cool and casual beside the large statues of Caesar. The predominantly buttermilk hotel has so many little hidden treasures and for me, it’s the food. We had lunch on the veranda and soaked up the sights of the aqua sea below. It’s a joy to dine al fresco, as you know, but a further joy to eat fresh food. When it comes to wine I like blush rose so we ordered a bottle of that plus some delicious local fresh salads to accompany it. It’s incredible mouthwatering food and you know every bite is good for you, maybe minus the wine!

Reminiscing about our own Italian wedding made me feel nostalgic. It’s funny how almost three years can go in the blink of an eye. Italy is our special place and I always love going there. On the day we arrived at Caesar Augustus, there was a wedding on and of course I earwigged at the vows, shed a tear and ended up having a few drinks later that night with the bride and groom! They were from Wales which sparked Richard’s interest immediately and we chatted for hours whilst drinking beautiful Italian specialities! The old charm of the Caesar Augustus is evident in their charm with all the staff and the surrounding site. As mentioned the food all organic and grown from their garden which is epic! I’m trying to eat organic as much as I can at the moment so every mouthful was delightful. I never wanted to leave… The weather in May was not too hot so you could sit on your balcony in the mornings with a nice coffee and relax. Our room was a beautiful suite and with the jacuzzi on board we were able to have some nights after dinner surrounded by candlelight looking at the stars!

AnaCapri was just as beautiful – it has it all as does the coast. The weather, the history, the culture, the romantic language, the food and the wine! It’s never beaten in my books and for something like a birthday celebration I didn’t want to have to travel too far. We discussed more far flung destinations but Italy seemed like the right one; old yet beautiful and with the sea and the beach on offer too I booked it straight way. Turning another year older has its good side believe me; I feel a lot more calm and excited about the future like I never have before, I’m venturing into business and have lots to learn but also lots to add to the plate too in terms of experience. There is a certain wisdom too that comes with getting a little older and I know that being away helped me reflect more on what I definitely don’t want as much as what I do, which believe me is just as important. Our last night in Caesar Augustus they laid on a very special birthday celebration at La Terrazzo di Lucille and the dinner overlooking the whole of Capri was out of this world. The restaurant is suspended between the sea and the sky so you can see Mount Vesuvius, Sorrentine Peninsula and the Bay of Naples. The food was exquisite and the friendly warm atmosphere in the restaurant meant we made friends and vowed to meet up with them the next day to sightsee. It’s a very popular spot their restaurant and many travel all over to experience the chef’s delights and the wines. I would urge anyone to see more spectacular views from AnaCapri then at Caesar Augustus.

Our final few days were spent up in what only can be described as food heaven. I booked Don Alfonso 1890 on recommendation and I am, if you don’t know already, a massive foodie. We headed over to Sorrento because a chef friend of mine said it would be criminal not to experience one of the most important culinary experiences of his life! I needed no more encouragement and we had what can only be described as mouthwatering elegance. Don Alfonso 1890, if you don’t know, is a 2 star Michelin Restaurant and considered one of the best restaurants in Italy. People come from all over the world to dine here and don’t be surprised if you’re sitting next to a celebrity, a food critic or a president! The food is worldwide renowned and for me being there was on my life bucket list. Don Alfonso is owned by the Laccarino family – Alfonso, Ernesto, Livia and Mario where they also have unbeatable top class restaurants in Morocco, China and another one on the way in the US. Nothing is conceived, designed or chosen especially for the menu and boy are you in for a gastronomy treat like no other, a mother earth experience.

On check our suite was pink, the restaurant was pink and white and Richard blended in with his pink jacket. The theme was pink and it was positively picture perfect. In all my years I’ve never been to a cooler and more ingenious restaurant/boutique hotel. The hotel offers it all, comfortable rooms, delicious meals, moonlit walks, boat trips, breakfasts on the terrace. I made friends with all the family and have found my tribe; my Italian Tribe. The hotel is modern but old, quirky but cool. The surrounding village is like something from a Fellini Film and the little winding roads to Positano only make for this jewel of the Sorrento Hills one of my favourite ever.

I made it my business to visit the farm of Livia & Alfonso and family during the day to learn how to cook some authentic Italian dishes. I met the bull, the chickens and the local produce that was bursting full of colour, life and vigour. It’s very enlightening to see where your food comes from and is produced. I think as I get older it’s more important to me and makes me understand how it is we eat and consume here in Ireland anything that’s on the shelves. Perhaps in school we should be taught to be more self sufficient and live off the land and grow our own tomatoes and salad even, small things even herbs that can add to the flour and importance of growing your own!

For me the highlight of the farm was visiting the lemon groves which was both beautiful to photograph and beautiful to smell. As they have a wine cellar that is world renowned we had to enjoy some of the finest & had wines from 1988, nearly as old as me. The restaurant experience is like something from a novel. You can visit the kitchen before you dine and meet the head chef. It’s utter genius, you can have up to 10 courses if you wish and each are a taste sensation. The food is served on beautiful white raised dishes and each are brought out with an Oxford dictionary explanation, it’s magic. My favourite part is how the lovely Livia asks about your plate and how you are enjoying it and to my mind IS the Queen of the restaurant. Mario her son is the cool dude and the ‘Maitre D’ who speak over 4 languages and makes the dining experience so unique with his great sense of humour and great storytelling.

I was thinking that maybe I should give up the day job and become a food critic if I’m fed as good as this? Only I’d be too busy eating it to comment, everything was out of this world! It suited me, and unfortunately my waistline, well enjoying and eating all the tasting delights out in front of me. It was heaven. I was sang Happy Birthday too and somehow dry ice ended up being involved in the cake? – it was magic! – a super few nights there. With only a week to spend in Capri, AnaCapri and Sorrento it was wonderful to get around to some of the lovely sights but for me to relax and chill out and savour the magic of the towns and soak up the energy. I adore travel and know that somewhere it’s my calling to do it for a living. I’ve traveled so much for my work over the years but I’d like to perhaps do a year of it, not sure how I’d manage that work wise and logistically but I really believe it’s an education to travel and to have time to explore. It’s key to broadening your horizons, making new friends, expanding your knowledge of food and culture and also to sample the delights of a new country. What could be cooler than that? OK I gained a few Italian pasta pounds but it was a birthday break of a lifetime. Roll on another year… !

For more on the hotels below simply log onto:

www.jkcapri.com

www.caesar-augustus.com

www.donalfonso.com

  The post Lisa Cannon in Italy – Bellissimo! Nothing Else Compares! appeared first on weddingsonline.

[fearofaherobrine]

Roleplay server Log #162

“Hyrule the water Baby”

[TLOT] Poor Notch... He won't be getting any sleep at all

[CP] - Exactly, where as I'm trying to coax Lie into sleeping again

[TLOT] Poor Lie, she's still having those nightmares?

[CP] - Don't know, she hasn't fallen asleep yet

[Doc] at Steve- you found the gems?

[Steve] Yeah! Here, My love has some of them as well. Here's the diamonds - holds out the blue rock candy-

[Doc] makes a click copy and offers the gem to the little dragon

[Yaunfen] Sniffs and starts to happily gum on it-

[TLOT] Well... She is a brine, she doesn't have to sleep if she really doesn't want too

[CP] - I recall you telling me how well that worked last time...

[Doc] I think we hit the jackpot in more ways then one, was that what you wanted little one?

[Yaunfen] Happy squeaks-

[TLOT] flustered- well it's hard on your psyche if you don't let your main-frame rest, but it can be done!

[CP] Sighs- Come on, let's get going

[CP] Opens a portal to the digital realm and steps through, once everyone is through he closes the portal and turns to Doc- Okay, find the server

[Doc] is just floating in the nothing and holding Yaunfen- ummm I think... - they're looking for something that feels like hir lover- that way!...?

- the vanilla cow seems distressed and Steve puts Stevie on its back

[TLOT] I can feel it too Doc... Go that way

[CP] - Consider this training for going out into the real world, because getting back is just as important

[Doc] Oh.... - Is casting about and starts going in a slightly different direction. - I do feel something familiar close by.... over this way...

[CP] Is fighting down his snickers-

[TLOT] Uh.. Doc I'm not sure that's our server.

[CP] Motions for TLOT to shut up-

[Doc] I think you're right, but it is one I know. - reaches out with hir free hand to touch the faint square.

[Doc] Walks forward and emerges into Cp's office. - Ah fuck.

[CP] Bursts out laughing-

[TLOT] Not nice Cp. They did find someplace we've been before, it wasn't a random seed.

[CP] - Oh but it is funny, and hey, at least they didn't find a way out to real world first

[Doc] Looks around for a moment and gets a naughty idea. Xe takes out one of the lollipop flowers and gives it a big lick before sticking it to the seat of Cp's desk chair and pushing it back under the desk.

[CP] - Come on Doc, I'm sure your mate is eager for you to get home

[Doc] Comes back out - Dammit.... Okay, I'm trying... - starts headed off in a different direction.

[TLOT] Just relax and feel around.

[Doc] This is odd... - Xe puts out a hand and touches a different pane. - it feels like... BEN actually...

[CP] - That's because that is Majora's Mask

[Doc] Ech... I don't have good memories associated with that game... Still feels a bit like his energy though.

[CP] - Probably not his copy

[Doc] Makes a suddenly brighter face and points a ways away. - I know there's at least one Pokemon game that direction, I don't know which one though.

[CP] - No

[Doc] I wasn't suggesting we go. Though I'm sure Stevie and your Honedge would enjoy it. - Is moving along at a walking pace.

[Stevie] Is lightly kicking the cow he's on-

[Steve] Be gentle Stevie, I think this cow is a bit freaked out being out here.

[Stevie] - Okay

[Doc] Actually there's a place here you don't know about, I bet. - Trots a bit to one side. - This one is where our friends Richtofen and Takeo came from. I can hear the zombies screaming from here. - It's also a good place for... aquiring unusual equiptment for experiments....

[CP] Growls a little-

[TLOT] That's a shooter isn't it.... Let's not...

[Doc] I wouldn't. The cow would get infected and it would be far too dangerous for Steve and Stevie.

[Stevie] - No zombies, zombies are bad and they bang on doors really loudly...

[Steve] playful- They're also stinky and bad tempered.

[Stevie] - Uh-huh!

[CP] Flicks a hand which forces a stray bit of coding farther away-

[Doc] Gets a devious look and sticks a hand into a rather dusty pane. Xe pulls hir hand back out with a large green leaf and tosses it at Cp. - Hey Cp, think fast!

[CP] Swats it away-

-As he touches it there's a VOOFP noise and suddenly Cp has a pair of raccoon ears on his head and a racoon tail on his rear.

[TLOT] Nearly chokes with laughter

[CP] -Doooooooooc....

[Stevie] Giggles as well-

[Doc] If you wag it you'll fly faster and I bet Stevie will laugh in a very sweetly endearing and childlike way at his funny big brother.

[CP] - How about I ram my sword up your ass instead!

[Doc] Yikes! Okay! I'm going! - Scoots out of reach and starts sniffing around for the feel of the server before heading off in a determined way.

{Stevie] - Let's go moo moo

[Doc] Ohhh. Cp... we should come back to this one just you and me later....

[CP] - What asinine thing are you talking about now?

[Doc] It's Vice City. I could go for some crazy driving, and I think you'd enjoy the flamethrower.

[CP] - I don't need a tool for that

[Doc] Then the plethora of targets would be to your liking at least.

[CP] - Whatever

[TLOT] Puts his ear near a pane. - I hear roaring...

[CP] - That's a Jurassic Park game

[Steve] Swallows - No.. dinosaurs please...

[Doc] Don't worry, I want to go home too.

[CP] - If you can find it

[TLOT] I really don't think we should be out here longer then nessesary. NOTCHs can seed hop too you know.

[CP] - Yeah yeah

[Doc] If holding Yaunfen close with one hand and touching pane after pane with the other. - Good gods there are so many Minecraft seeds...

[CP] - Yup, oh hey, that's one of the ones I used to be on

[TLOT] does that mean your NOTCH wrecked it already?

[CP] - Nope, I did

[Doc] Has caught a scent now and is starting to run.

[CP] - I don't feel like running

[TLOT] Then walk. - Hurries after Doc pulling the cow along with Steve beside him.

[CP] Decides to float along instead, setting the tail and ears on fire to destroy them-

[Doc] Is inputing a complex passcode onto a pane that's much shinier then the ones around it. - I found it!

[CP] - Found what?

[Doc] Opens the wall to show the savannah and an afternoon sky- Home.

- There's a bit of bellowing as the mammoths react to the humans and brines and shuffle farther away.

[Stevie] - What are those!

[TLOT] Leads them inside after Doc - They're mammoths Stevie. Lie took a liking to some on an outing with Doc.

[Doc] I couldn't resist rescuing a few. They're so fuzzy and majestic.

[Stevie] - Look brother!  Home!

[CP] - Yeah yeah

[Doc] I wonder how Aven and BEN are faring? We're near their house.

[aven] -is siting outside with hyrule in her arms-

[CP] - I don't know or care right now

[TLOT] Leads the cow towards Gem's house since they can see it from where they are anyway.

[CP] Groans and follows to keep an eye on Stevie-

[Steve] Runs up ahead of the others - Hey Aven!

[aven] oh hello.

[Steve] Awww, how are you holding up Aven?

[TLOT] I smell something stinky...

[aven] I was going to have gem give hyrule a bath when she got back while I distracted ben because he is over protective.

[Doc] Walks up as well - Hey Aven. Ah, that sounds like a good idea. Look what I have, you're not the only one with a little babe to tend now. Meet Yuanfen.

[Yuanfen] Still gumming on the candy diamond-

[aven] is it made of candy while eating candy?

[Doc] They just look like candy as camoflage I think. But yes, Yaunfen likes candy. Their whole home seed is candy and cake and ice cream. It's heavily modded. The cow came from there too.

[TLOT] The milk is vanilla flavored, want some?

[aven] yes that sounds good.

[Steve] Pulls out the bucket again and fills it for her before passing it.

[TLOT] Um Aven... I could wash Hyrule again if you want, it smells like he needs it.

[Stevie] - What's the tiny thing?

[aven] -takes the bucket in one hand while holding hyrule- I will have to distract ben but sure it would be helpful.

[TLOT] It's a baby Stevie. A tiny person.

[Doc] Where is BEN anyway?

[Stevie] - How did it get here?

[Steve] Aven made him. With some help from BEN.

[aven] he should be inside -takes a sip of the milk- oh this is good.

[Stevie] - So a boy and a girl can make a baby?

[Steve] Yep. That's not the only way you can do it, but I think it's the simpliest.

[Stevie] - So brother could make one with miss Lie?

[TLOT] Takes out some of the lollipop flowers- Looks at this haul Aven, you should have seen it. It was crazy pastel everywhere.

[aven] that seem like a lot of candy.

[Steve] Well... no because Lie gave up one of the parts she needed cause she's not ready to be a mom just yet. But she could if she changed her mind.

[TLOT] Oh yes. Toffee for gold, rock candy diamonds and sticky strawberry lava.

[Stevie] - But I want a little brother so I can play the big brother!

[Steve] Aww. What about Ashe? You're older then he is.

[Stevie] - But he's already bigger than me sometimes

[Steve] Bigger doesn't matter, you're still older. Besides. He could use someone strong to help him out.

[Stevie] - But his momma is really strong!

[Steve] Yeah but she's not a kid and she has to look after Willow and Oak too. It would be a big help.

[Stevie] - Okay

[aven] gem would have a field day with that candy she has a huge sweet tooth

[TLOT] I didn't know that! Hang on, I'll copy some of this and give it to you.

[Doc] Just not the endstone sponge cake. It seems to expand if you leave it anywhere.

[CP] - Stevie, do you wanna head home?  You still have that...  Blanket, fort to work on...

[Stevie] - I wanna keep riding the cow!

[TLOT] Gives Aven a big handful of candies and cake blocks - Here you go. And you should let me take care of Hyrule. Is it better to tell BEN or just be quick about it?

[aven] then lets head inside the main area there is a caldron in the bathroom there.

[Steve] I'll stay out here and watch Stevie and.. Moo Moo?

[Doc] Do you need help TLOT?

[TLOT] Only if BEN attacks me.

[Doc] I'm coming with you.

[BEN] Has barricaded the bathroom door and hung a sign- NO BATHING THE BABY IN WATER!

[aven] -starts to head inside-

[TLOT] Hmm... should we go in the kitchen instead?

[aven] yep.

[BEN] Is in the kitchen eating-

[Doc] Offers Yaunfen hir shoulders - could you crawl up and lay down?

[aven] -hands tlot hyrule-

[Yuanfen] Scrambles up, digging hir claws in a bit-

[Doc] Winces a bit, but hir coat mostly protects hir from the dragons thick claws. - What do you need TLOT?

[BEN] Glares at TLOT- Why do you have Hyrule?

[aven] -goes over to ben- because you need to chill

[TLOT] You know why BEN, he's stinky. I just came over to visit, but it looks like you needed help anyway. -turns to Doc- Just a diaper and some bone meal.

[BEN] Is immediately between TLOT and the water source-  Don't you dare

[aven] -trying is dragging ben away upstairs-

[BEN] - NO!  MY SON WILL NOT DROWN!

[TLOT] Come on BEN, I didn't hurt him last time, what makes you think this would be different?

[aven] I will get one of gem's guardian to carry you upstairs he won't drown I promise.

[Doc] BEN, it does make my hearts happy to see how much you care about him.

[BEN] Is snarling at TLOT-

[TLOT] I'll make it quick. Trust me. - He switches the baby to one hand and puts some water in the cauldron sink before turning up his glitch around his fingers to make it a bit warm.

[aven] -yells- hey vin can you help me carry ben upstairs?

[vin] -comes downstairs and because he is very tall picks up ben-

[BEN] Struggles desperately to get out of Vin's grasp-

[vin] -is strong and carries him upstairs-

[Doc] Sets out some cloth for a diaper and a bone meal blob.

[TLOT] Lays the baby in the bit of water and starts washing him gently.

[BEN] - HYRULE!  DON'T DROWN!

[Doc] Oh hush, you'll make him cry yelling like that.

[hyrule] -starts babbling and bouncing once he sees the water-

[CP] Is snickering at BEN-

[TLOT] Is making silly noises at the baby and playing with his teeny fingers and toes.

[hyrule] -is giggling trying to grab tlots fingers-

[TLOT] makes tiny splashes with his fingers for Hyrule.

[hyrule] -splashes along with tlot-

[BEN] Can be heard yelling upstairs-

[TLOT] Gives the baby a through washing and reaches for the towel Doc is holding to pat him off. - Man you really like a good bath. Somehow two hydrophobics equaled one hydrophilliac.

[Doc] Yeah, he's gonna have an interesting childhood.

[aven] yeah ben is going to be going insane over it and gem will probably teach him to swim.

[BEN] - HYRULE!

[aven] ben chill he is fine.

[BEN] - HE GOT WET!

[aven] wet doesn't equal drown ben.

[BEN] - YES IT DOES!

[aven] unless hyrule breaths though his skin he isn't going to drown by being wet.

[TLOT] Powders Hyrule's butt and ties a clean diaper around him. - There we go! All clean and not even a teeny bit drowned.

[Doc] Unless BEN considers that his last name...

[BEN] - THERE IS SUCH A THING AS DRY DROWNING!

[Doc] Oh is that when your lungs fill with fluid and you choke?

[aven] -is facepalming-

[BEN] - USUALLY AFTER A NEAR DROWNING!

[Doc] Shush, he's fine. Look he's smiling. Ready for his proud parents to coo over him some more

[hyrule] -is giggling-

[BEN] Get's free of Vin and darts downstairs again-

[snake] -kazoo's loudly at ben as he almost stepped on him-

[TLOT] Is holding Hyrule gently

[BEN] - Hyrule!

[Doc] Is scratching Yaunfen's chin lightly.

[TLOT] Here you go- Holds the baby out for BEN to take.

[BEN] Takes Hyrule and floats up by the ceiling holding him protectively-

[Doc] Looks up - So apart from the conniption fit, how are you doing BEN?

[BEN] - Okay I guess...

[TLOT] Losing sleep? I hear babies cry a lot.

[hyrule] wa-er

[BEN] Freezes-

[aven] well it looks like hyrule's first word is water

[Doc] First word! Awww!

[BEN] - noooooooooooooooo

[TLOT] I guess he really does like getting a bath.

[hyrule] wa-er wa-er

[BEN] - No, how about lightning?- Brings a little of his green electricity into his hand

[Doc] Too many syllables for a first word.

[hyrule] wa-er

[BEN] Groans-

[BEN] - Aven!  Our child is defective!

[aven] hyrule is fine the only reason he isn't scared is because he never drowned and I would like to keep it that way.

[BEN] - Are you sure we can't trade him in for another?

[aven] -face palms- that's not how that works

[BEN] - Are we sure?

[aven] one hundred percent

[BEN] Whines-

[hyrule] wa-er

[BEN] - No, lightning

[hyrule] wa-er wa-er

[BEN] - Light-ning

[aven] I don't think he is going to say lightning

[BEN] - Shut up

[hyrule] wa-er

[BEN] - No, light-ning

[hyrule] wa-er

[BEN] - Light-ning

[hyrule] wa-er

[BEN] - Light-ning

[hyrule] wa-er wa-er wa-er

['BEN] Groans- I will find a way to remove that word from your vocabulary

[aven] ben let him say it

[BEN] - No way, water is evil and dangerous and why aren't you on my side?  You were killed by it too!

[aven] only my ben half drowned

[BEN] - That's not the point!

[aven] the point is our kid doesn't have hydrophobia like us.

[BEN] - HOW CAN HE NOT HAVE IT!?

[aven] because where you born with hydrophobia I know I wasn't

[BEN] Grumbles a little-

[aven] he was just not born with any fear of water

[BEN] Turns his attention back to Hyrule- Say light-ning

[hyrule] wa-er

[aven] try some thing easyer like mommy or daddy

[BEN] - ANYTHING, but- grimaces- water...

[hyrule] wa-er

[BEN] - No

[hyrule] wa-er

[BEN] - NO!  Light-ning

[hyrule] -starts crying because ben yelled-

[BEN] - Shit!  Aven!

[aven] give hyrule to me

[BEN] Hands Hyrule over before pulling out his ocarina and begins softly playing Zelda's lullabye-

[aven] -starts rocking hyrule in her arms-

[hyrule] -slowly calming down now-

[BEN] Keeps playing-

[hyrule] -falls asleep in aven's arms-

[BEN] Lets the music dwindle away before lowering the instrument-

[aven] -quietly- I think it's time to put hyrule in his crib

[BEN] - Just no more water

[aven] hyrule is already clean

[BEN] - No more water ever...

[aven] if hyrule likes water then sooner or later he is going to want to swim

[BEN] - NOOOOOO!

[aven] shush you will wake hyrule.

[BEN] Whimpers-

[aven] there will be water in hyrule's future but not drowning

[BEN] Growls- No water, ever!

[aven] -is already starting to bring hyrule upstairs- it's not just your decision

[BEN] - Watch me!

[aven] -is already halfway across the hallway upstairs-

[BEN] Grumbles-

[snake] -he is on the edge of the stairs- hyrule needs baths ben.

[BEN] - No he doesn't...  Neither do I...

[snake] you both do -kazoos at him-

[BEN] - Bath's are over-rated!

[snake] even aven knows when to keep her self clean.

[BEN] Growls-

[snake] -kazoos at ben because he growled-

[askylark]

A/N~ how do you reply to replies h e l p

I couldn’t decide and someone asked for reaper mei so I just?? Like its difficult but I’m gonna combine these two bc idk and I’m indecisive as hell

He didn’t quite know when she had become a part of his routine. Perhaps it had been that she had been his polar opposite with her cheerfulness and talkative ways. Perhaps it had been that while everyone else gave him wary glances or pitying looks she only smiled and asked if he wanted a slice of the cake she made for her own birthday because she wasn’t sure anyone else would remember. Perhaps it had been because she had once drawn a childlike picture of the Overwatch team and taped it to their fridge and she had included him in it despite the strain he’d caused with his tentative return. 

Perhaps it was that there was something about her that reminded him of his mother--the short height and plumpness of her body, the brown hair and large brown eyes and the way she could care less when he tried to act tough. 

She felt refreshingly uncaring of his deteriorated state, of the fact that they didn’t know whether to jail him, murder him or pretend he was his old self--the only things preoccupying her ever busy mind being researching climate change, books and sweets. 

“Gabriel,” She murmured with her thick accent, and he paused at her lack of glasses. “Would you like to go get some ice cream?” 

He felt everyone else in the room fix their gazes upon them, the silence making him uneasy in a way he loathed. There was a heavy wind outside, the sidewalks and streets covered in black ice from last nights snowfall--and they all had a bounty on their heads from the many enemies Overwatch had thwarted--and she wanted to walk to the ice cream shop a good fifteen minutes away?  

“No.” He looked away from her, his back to everyone’s worried looks. 

She smiled, oblivious to the tension she had caused. “Okay! Be back soon!” She walked towards the glass door--and then into it, the smack of her face sharp and almost comical. She covered her face with gloved hands and laughed loudly. “Sorry sorry sorry. Haven’t found my glasses yet.” She giggled and adjusted her sweater primly. “Snowball will help me, won’t you snowball?” 

The small machine’s eyes curled in happiness, whirring an eager approval as she pet him. 

Gabe let out a soft groan and went for his coat.

She was a complete disaster.

She’d nearly died several times--either from slipping over ice or nearly walking into oncoming traffic--and what set his temper the most was how she babbled incessantly through the whole thing, as if him jerking her back hadn’t just prevented her from becoming a bloodstain on the street. 

“My friends and I used to eat ice cream all the time!” She let him open the door for her as she began to unbutton her coat. “People thought we were crazy since it was always snowing. But ice cream always makes me feel warmer. Isn’t that silly?” 

He kept his coat on as he followed her to the glass covering the buckets of colorful ice cream, wondering which one she’d choose. The shop was a cozy one, different from the steel counter tops and machine run facility of their headquarters. 

The walls were painted pinstriped like candy canes, a thin strip of silver  separating the reds and whites. The ceiling was made of large metal squares, their reflection as clear as if it were a mirror.    

“Can you guess my favorite flavor, Gabriel?” He looked down at her question, wondering if she could read his thoughts. She was standing much too close to him--perhaps because her blurred vision prevented her from seeing much--and he was suddenly very aware of the porcelain color of her skin, of the petal pink color of her full cheeks and small lips. 

When was the last time he had kissed someone? Even pulling her up after she’d slipped--for the brief moment he’d had her small body in his arms--had felt like a shock of heat, a curl of warmth unfurling deep in his stomach. 

“Fresa.” He murmured, his breath hovering just over her mouth. 

Her frown was child-like. “Does that mean chocolate?”

“Strawberry.” He corrected. 

She hummed. “It’s not my favorite. Is it yours?”

He nodded ever so slightly. 

She smiled, the brightness of it confusing. “I would’ve guessed coffee since everyone drinks it so much!” She faced the young boy behind the counter with the happiness of a child choosing a brand new toy. “I want the toffee, William--that is you, right?” She squinted at him.

“Yes!” The boy grabbed a large waffle cone and began scooping diligently.  

“And you Gabriel?”

“Gabe.” He muttered. “I don’t want anything.”

She giggled and he wondered what exactly was so funny. 

“He will have the strawberry!”

 There was a reason he had not wanted ice cream. 

He sat much too still across the cherry stamped table from her, the pink scoops slowly beginning to soften and glisten from the warmth of the shop. Mei was already half way through with hers, scraping the edges of her toffee soaked waffle cone with a small neon green spoon. She’d been quiet for some time now as she made quick work of her scoops but now her big brown eyes focused upon him.

“Is something wrong, Gabriel?”

He despised how many times she said his name in a day. He’d let the sound become something he looked forward to. 

“No.”

She put her spoon down beside her coat and scarf--and he noted the ice cream stains on them dully. 

“Then why are you not eating?”

He looked out the window, the reflection of his bone white mask much too clear.

“If it makes you more comfortable I will not look.” She promised quietly, a mixture of carefulness and hope in her eyes. “I am also quite shy.” She admitted, color flushing her small features. “Maybe not with talking but...” She gestured to her coat. “My body. It’s why I wear so many layers.” She laughed. “My mother always tried to stop me from eating sweets. Especially in my teenage years.” Her smile was small. “Kids in school are merciless, you know.”

 He reached up slowly, deliberately, his thumb hooking beneath the chin of his mask. Something flickered in her gaze as he lifted it up--and when he peeled it off and looked at her she had her small hands clamped over her eyes. 

“I promised I wouldn’t look!” Her voice warbled. “I keep my promises.” 

The cold air felt electrifying on his raw skin, his body thrumming with an anger she did not deserve. He clenched his teeth together to prevent from speaking, fists curled. A minute passed with taut silence--and she slowly dropped her hands, eyes closed shut. 

“Look at me.” Gabriel muttered. 

“No.” Mei frowned. “I promised--”

“I didn’t ask you to.” He interrupted, knowing after tonight she’d keep far far away from him. “Look at me. It’s the least you can do.” It’s easy to be around me when I have my mask on. 

With her breath held, she opened her eyes slowly. Her large brown eyes traced over him helplessly, her brow furrowing in confusion at his scarred and raw visage. She blinked rapidly--and suddenly a huge grin split across her lovely face. Her shoulders shook and her hand covered her mouth as she tried to stifle her--is she laughing? 

“Oh, Gabriel!” She gasped between her chokes of laughter. “I can’t see a thing!” She laughed harder, her face cherry pink. “I can’t see a thing without my glasses.” She laughed until she gripped her own stomach in pain and he couldn’t help but be completely baffled by her reaction. 

Why am I so relieved?

They walked out of the shop some time later in complete silence, her small hands pressed against her lips for warmth. 

“Here.” Gabe wrapped his long fingers around her wrist, tugging it down between them. She didn’t seem to understand just what he was doing--but gratefully stayed silent when she understood. 

He held her hand the entire way home. 

[bharatiyamedia-blog]

Chicago's Yūgen Delights, However Can Be Overwhelming: Restaurant Overview

http://tinyurl.com/y3zv3x3f Mari Katsumura was strolling down West Randolph Avenue in Chicago’s restaurant-jammed West Loop on her means residence from work and at a crossroads in her profession. She was the pastry chef and savory sous chef at a forgettable restaurant known as Gideon Candy, “and I made a decision that it was time to maneuver on,” she remembers. The commute between work and her house took her previous the grave of Grace, a restaurant ranked three stars by Michelin, which abruptly closed in late 2017 when chef Curtis Duffy walked out over an acrimonious dispute with proprietor Michael Olszewski. Katsumura knew each events; she had been the opening pastry chef at Grace and labored there for 3 years. “[Olszewski] was conducting tastings with potential candidates” for Grace’s substitute, Katsumura says. He noticed her as she handed, they usually began chatting. “After which simply by probability I turned a candidate.” Katsumura received the job, her first as an govt chef, and the remaining band members fell into place: from the acclaimed Smyth and the Loyalist up the road, Jeanine Lamadieu on pastry; Olivia Noren, a sommelier from Le Bernardin in New York, on beverage; and MBA Morgan Olszewski, Michael’s daughter, on normal supervisor duties. The place as soon as was Grace now could be Yūgen, an bold restaurant named after the Japanese idea of consciousness of the universe’s infinite magnificence and thriller and our capability, as mere mortals, to understand it. Heady enterprise. Chef Mari Katsumura. Courtesy of Yūgen On the restaurant, they don’t take the identify tremendous actually. “We tailored the definition to our personal which means of the concord between meals and ambiance and repair, sort of bringing nature inward,” Katsumura says, noting the darkish oak tabletops in lieu of Grace’s white cloths and the shaggy dwelling wall by the glassed-in kitchen. The eating room—which has the slick, monotone beauty of a first-class airplane cabin—rebuffs these overtures. It’s not shifting anybody to pen an existential poem about nature. On the upside, the $1,000-a-pop buttercream bucket chairs inherited from Grace are loopy comfy, which is essential whenever you’re settling in for 10 programs ($205). (A condensed five-course menu is obtainable, as effectively, for $110.) And in contrast to the design, the meals at Yūgen does have the flexibility to make your mind swell and pores and skin prickle: a quivering Satori oyster within the sheerest tempura bodysuit; a marshmallow-like dice of sweet-pea-and-tofu soufflé floating in miso consommé of astounding readability; pristine kanpachi sashimi flavored with lemonade-like sweetness of candied Buddha’s Hand. All components from the opening programs, these begin the meal on a robust footing. Household Circle Katsumura grew up in her mother and father’ restaurant, Yoshi’s Café, in Lakeview. Her French-trained father, Yoshi, is “broadly thought-about the progenitor of fusion in Chicago, melding Asian components with European methods,” meals author Kevin Pang wrote in a 2011 story within the Chicago Tribune. A 1985 assessment of Yoshi’s in the identical paper mentions dishes like grilled beef tenderloin in gingered Zinfandel sauce and cookie-crusted Japanese pear tart with raspberry puree. Within the early 1990s, Yoshi dropped a lot of the French pretense and added neighborhood-friendly objects like crab wontons, tofu steak, and a Wagyu burger. Topped with selection of cheese, a panko-crusted fried inexperienced tomato, Asian pear jam, tomato-pickle aioli, truffle oil, and arugula, that burger was named the very best on the town in 2012 on the metropolis’s annual meals and wine competition. It’s nonetheless on the menu on the café, which Katsumura’s mom, Nobuko, has continued to function after Yoshi’s passing in 2015. Like many immigrants who get their foothold in America within the restaurant trade, her mother and father “did every part of their energy to make it possible for [their children] didn’t comply with of their footsteps,” Katsumura says. She studied artwork—which is smart whenever you behold her expertise for plating—however was drawn again to the kitchen. “I’d say I’ve come full circle,” which is doubly true when you think about that Katsumura’s type echoes her father’s. Solely at Yūgen, the methods are simply as typically Japanese as they’re European, and the components simply as typically American as they’re Japanese. When it really works, man, it really works. Take the pasta course, al dente agnolotti usual from elastic rye ramen dough and full of gentle okara, the curdlike by-product of creating tofu and soy milk. Katsumura weaves these bundles right into a wreath with fried and pickled mushrooms, toasted kale, and pickled huckleberries, the fragile fruit leaching deep purple swirls into the sauce, a traditional beurre monté fortified with kombu oil. Or the belief fund of ramps—pickled, soubise, chimichurri-ed with yuzu, steamed in dashi—paired with a thick bar of pink A5 Wagyu glazed with inexperienced yuzu kosho. A complete fried ramp curled across the beef, its crystalline emerald frond sticking into the air like a large dragonfly wing. When it doesn’t work, overcrowding is accountable. It looks like Katsumura has a ferocious urge to get all her concepts onto one plate. Virtually each course might do with one or two fewer elements. Typically it’s simply because the dish doesn’t want it—why disguise that pristine sashimi within the circa-2002 theatrics of liquid-nitro citrus snow? Chawanmushi dish at Yūgen. Courtesy of Anthony Tahlier Different occasions, the extras are lively antagonists. Smoked foie gras fats and Honeycrisp apple syrup wreck the uni chawanmushi; what must be a dreamy indulgence as a substitute eats so aggressively smoky and candy it’s like having comfortable scrambled eggs drenched in barbecue sauce. Omitting the salmon roe, tamari-cured egg yolk, and/or frothy uni butter would possibly mitigate the intense saltiness of the crab rice that might have been beautiful and comforting. I overhear a server telling a pair on the subsequent desk that the dish is impressed by Katsumura’s favourite after-school snack. “As a Japanese household we at all times had a pot of rice on in any respect time, and I’d make a small bowl of it blended with furikake, Kewpie mayonnaise, a fried egg, and no matter protein scraps we had within the fridge,” Katsumura says. “Clearly the [restaurant version] is an elevated type utilizing luxurious components and house-made condiments,” however I’d argue the unique dish, faithfully re-created by knowledgeable chef, would nearly definitely be higher. Childhood Desserts for Adults Enjoying cleanup crew to Wagyu and ramps, the ultimate savory course, shouldn’t be a simple gig, however Jeanine Lamadieu has a expertise for pastry means past her 24 years. Like her boss, she mines childhood reminiscences from her Staten Island, N.Y., upbringing. However teasing out flavors and textures from, say, a crumb-coated Good Humor Strawberry Shortcake ice cream bar and placing them again collectively into one thing contemporary and fascinating is further difficult within the context of a Japanese-ish tasting menu that prices greater than the month-to-month lease cost on a Hyundai Elantra. Lamadieu is up for the problem. The strawberry pre-dessert was a three-bite pink Zamboni, wiping clear the persistent umami and allium warmth of the earlier course with pulverized strawberry streusel (the inspirational popsicle’s signature crumbs), racy kefir sorbet, strawberry caramel, strawberry jus, and arugula. It possesses that floral sweetness and zingy acid that makes a strawberry good however is exceedingly laborious to translate right into a strawberry dessert. Milk and cookies at Yūgen. Courtesy of Anthony Tahlier A meditation on Oreos as cereal follows. Not Oreo Cereal, however Oreos bashed up within the bowl and drowned in milk, one in every of Lamadieu’s favorites as a child. At Yūgen meaning cocoa cookies vacuum-compressed whereas heat in order that they tackle the feel of uncooked cookie dough; a bombe of bittersweet caramelized milk ice cream and tangy, lactic buttermilk foam; and shards of smoky meringue freckled with the charcoal-roasted inexperienced tea generally known as hojicha. Lamadieu additionally makes the intelligent mignardises that accompany the verify—from excellent to extraordinary: brown-butter financier dusted with togarashi sugar, jasmine profiterole, attractive vanilla canelé, crunchy ardour fruit Nutter Butter—in addition to the 4 desserts on the à la carte menu served in Yūgen’s entrance lounge, Kaisho. I ponder if Kaisho is the transfer right here. I peek at it on the way in which out, and the petite izakaya seems like a spot you could possibly calm down in, the place the workers, unencumbered by the calls for and construction of serving a proper tasting menu, is perhaps barely much less robotic, the place you could possibly spend a little bit extra on the wonderful cocktails and considerate sake and wine lists, as a result of the udon carbonara, rooster karaage with fermented shishito aioli, and black truffle takoyaki are all below $20. On the very least, I guess the Wagyu burger is de facto good. Extra must-read tales from Fortune: —To fight meals waste, these Brooklyn companies teamed as much as brew bagel beer —Toronto is residence to a thriving Syrian food scene —Acclaimed chef Thomas Keller on fine dining and eating ‘local’ —Fauna in Mexico’s Valle de Guadalupe is serving classic dishes better than anywhere else —Hearken to our new audio briefing, Fortune 500 Daily Follow Fortune on Flipboard to remain up-to-date on the newest information and evaluation. Source link

[pawsomekittyblog]

Can Cats Eat Ice Cream?

Every time I curl up on the couch with my big bucket of ice cream, I can’t help it but notice this look of longing that my cat has in her eyes. It’s like she knows what I am eating is heavenly and she would just love even just a bit. But can cats eat ice cream?

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What Is Autism?

Like any cat owner and lover, you must have the same thought on whether or not to give your cat ice-cream. After all, if it tastes great to you, there is a fair chance that your cat will love it too right?

The Story of Cats and Milk

The truth is, cats have a long history with milk that dates back to the 20th century. Back then, the processed cat food that we know now did not exist. Instead, cat owners would dip brown bread in milk to give to cats for breakfast. In the evening, the cats would get small bits of milk. It is a far cry from the quality cat food that we have now but it got the cats then going.

Around the 1930’s there was a major overhaul in the diet of cats which recommended the exclusion of bread and milk from the cat’s diet. Raw meat became the primary food for most cats. Currently, we rely on processed foods that have a careful balance of nutrients that are essential to the cat’s well-being.

Nonetheless, even with all the dietary changes, you might still notice your cat having some very keen interest on milk. Typically because dairy is the primary product on ice cream, most owners tend to think that if cats are happy lapping up milk, they will more than gladly take on some ice-cream. But is it okay for the cat to gorge on ice cream?

Cats and Ice Cream

It is important to note straight off the bat that your cat will not die or get seriously ill from eating small amounts of ice cream. As for the question of can cats eat ice cream, they can and they will show some interest in it but, there are plenty of other factors that you should be aware of prior to allowing your cat to eat ice cream.

Ice cream contains artificial sweeteners (even for the sugar free variety) some of which (like xylitol) are toxic to dogs but, they don’t have any significant effects on fur balls.

If you wondering can cats eat ice cream because of how great it tastes, you’re wrong. Cats don’t have sweet taste receptors in their tongue and cannot taste all that sugar in ice cream. This does not mean the cat will avoid the taste. It only means they don’t respond to it.

Why do Cats Love Ice Cream?

If you’re observant about your cat, you notice that they seem to have an affinity for ice cream. They seem to like it but, it is not about the sugar. The affair between cats and ice cream is in the ingredients.

You will also notice that cats love whole milk but they always seem to give skimmed or fat free milk the blind eye. They don’t even seem to look interested in frozen yoghurt despite it being another human favourite. So, what is it with cats and ice cream?

Cats are attracted by products that have amounts of carbohydrates and fat content. Ice cream falls squarely in this range and so does whole milk.  Even though there are other foods that also have high fat and carbohydrate concentration, cats are used to the consistency of milk hence the preference.

Is Ice Cream Bad for Cats?

Cat’s love ice cream for sure. But, it is not everything you love that is good for you. The same case applies to cats. Your care for your cat extends to more than just what it likes but also what is good for her.

In large quantities, ice cream can be bad for your cat. But, you can give him small amounts of ice cream as a treat very rarely. If too much of the ice cream is given to the cat or little amounts given frequently, there is a fair chance that your cat is going to end up having quite a number of problems. The biggest of them is usually diarrhoea because cats are not able to process lactose very well.

Why are Cats not able to Process Lactose?

Ever since we were kids, cats and milk looked like a match made in heaven. Even as adults, you must have come across quite a number of different images and videos of a kitten happily lapping at a bowl of milk. It seems unthinkable that whole milk would actually be of any harm to the cat.

But, it is. Like their owners, cats also have a lactose intolerance problem. The only difference is, in cats, the problem is more wide spread.

When kittens are young, their bodies are engineered to process milk that is produced by momma cat. At this age, they have plenty of lactase enzymes in their bodies. As they grow up, the production of the enzyme declines as the body prepares to digest other types of proteins.

This means that most cats in their adult age don’t have enough lactase enzymes to process and digest the lactose that is found in milk and in ice cream. This is why, when fed on too much of dairy products some cats will start to diarrhoea. However, not all cats have this problem. There are some cats that don’t have the lactose intolerance problem and have more lactase enzyme than others.

Will Ice Cream Upset my Cat’s Stomach?

Because cats are not able to comprehensively digest lactose, there will be some discomfort in your cat’s tummy. Unlike other compounds, the ice cream that is undigested will remain in fluid form. When it gets in touch with the digestive juices in the cat’s stomach, some of it curdles up and can lead to gas and discomfort for the cat.

The liquid ice cream is passed out with other waste and without a doubt, your cat will have a diarrhoea situation.

Does Ice Cream Pose any Nutritional Problems to the Cat?

There is a difference between eating just about anything and eating things that are vital to your health. One reason why you should not feed ice cream to your cat is because it takes up room in the cat’s stomach and keeps it from eating more nutritious foods that have more benefits to the cat.

On the question can cats eat ice cream frequently? The answer is, it can lead to nutritional deficiencies because they are not able to eat foods that contain taurine, which is very prominent in foods like raw meat. If the cat has malnutrition, you might have to put her on supplements to help get her back in shape.

What Flavours of Ice Cream are Safe for the Cat?

If you’re keen on giving your cat ice cream as a treat, then it would be okay to wonder which flavour would be best for the cat. Ideally, vanilla is a great place to start. To curb the diarrhoea, you might also want to consider giving the cat ice cream made from goat milk since it has different composition.

Strawberry flavour will probably not be any better. Strawberries are non-toxic and are safe for the cat but they will not add any nutritional value to the cat. However, additives like chocolate should not be anywhere close to your cat. Chocolate has a variety of compounds that cannot be processes by the cat and when they build up, they can end up being toxic.

Ice cream does not have any nutritional value and might not be harmful to your cat but as a general rule of thumb, it is better to stay away from it. Instead, you can try this GUND Pusheen Snackable Ice Cream Plush Stuffed Animal for your cat. There are no risks and it will not give your cat a runny stomach but she will have plenty of fun and exercise while playing with it.

Conclusion…

There is no question that you can feed your cat some ice cream. However, while doing this, you need to keep a close eye on the amount of ice cream you feed the cat and also for any signs of diarrhoea.

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[multipleforks]

The Germans have a word (vorfreude, vor-FROY-dah) in their language and its meaning is described as: “the joyful, intense anticipation that comes from imagining future pleasures.” Having spoken with executive chefs at different food shows around the country, watching the Netflix series “Chef’s Table” repeatedly, and working toward visiting all the 3-Star Michelin restaurants in the United States, the vorfreude surrounding my latest trip to Chicago to eat at Alinea did not disappoint.

Before I left for Chicago, anyone that asked me what I was doing in late September heard my normal laundry list of activities surrounding my job but I always managed to add the interpolation, ‘I am going to Alinea for dinner.’ I told everyone I came in contact with ranging from friends, family, networking contacts, gas station attendants, other people walking their dogs, children and anyone who would listen. My greatest joy came from all those people who replied, “where?”, because it gave me the opportunity to describe the magic, prestige, and forward thinking that is, Alinea.

If you are unfamiliar with Alinea, allow me to explain briefly. You are probably more familiar with the alinea symbol in writing, from your grammar school days, than anything else. An alinea is the, ¶, symbol indicating a new paragraph or a new idea. The restaurant takes that meaning to a whole new level under the direction of Chef Grant Achatz; he is constantly moving forward with new ideas for tastes, presentations, and sensory effects.  This incredible restaurant has three options for a guest to dine on Chef Grant’s amazing ideas; The Kitchen Table is the most intimate and cutting edge, it’s completely private tasting for 6 guests only and you get to witness everything going in the kitchen for $385/pp; the Gallery provides  a multi-sensory 16-18 course menu combined with experimental moments, $285-$355/pp; and the Salon offers 10-14 course tasting menu at $175-$255/pp (https://alinea.tocktix.com/).

As I said, my anticipation for this restaurant was overwhelming; so much so, I arrived fifteen minute early!  Arrival at the restaurant is quite intimidating. It appears to be a small, narrow, dark, building with no signage as you approach from the street. Having eaten at all of the 3-Star Michelin restaurants in NYC, this was quite different. It is all part of the ‘illusion’ that is Alinea. We arrived right on time for our 6pm reservation and were escorted upstairs. What appeared to be a small, dark building from the outside opened up to a well lit, incredibly decorated, airy interior. Upon arriving into the cozy, modern, and intimate salon room on the second floor, my date and I sat next to each other on a sofa seat rather than across from one another; for me, it added to the intimate theme of the night.

I noticed immediately, there were six tables in the room and everyone was on various stages of their meal, taking pictures, staring in awe and deeply engaged in the experience. The room seated 20 people and was serviced by three, handsomely dressed gentlemen whose attention to detail was nothing short of Sherlock Holmes. In the center of the table was a stainless-steel fruit bowl filled with fresh oranges and clementines. There was also a large index card with cryptic lettering made to resemble a cross word puzzle next to the bowl. We were then presented with two limes with the top part cut out and a spear leaf carefully placed on top of it. As we looked at the wine list, the waiter told us we could start with this dish whenever we were ready. It was an explosion of unique flavors including lime, avocado, and coriander, and the tastiest garden greens you could ever imagine.

When the waiter came back we tried to order cocktails, but were told wine and select beers were the only options available. We ended up selecting a beautiful, vintage Sancerre whose crisp taste accentuated each dish that emerged from the kitchen.  

Every dish was so unexplainably interesting, a true combination of molecular gastronomy along with a sense of bewilderment and complete sensory overload. Our menu for the evening included: Osetra caviar on a banana pancake with allium; crunchy rouille nori; langoustine paper in a bouillabaisse with olice oil; peeled tomatoes with nuts, orange and sherry; bocadillo with a manchego cheese baguette and onions; black bass with shellfish and kuzu; kaffir lime and tropical fruit; maitake mushroom with bluberry and lapsang souchong tea; potato with truffle and Midwest dairy; turbot with crunchy black rice, pinapple and hearts of palm; salsify root with spices; sweet potato, chocolate and miso dessert; bubblegum, cake and strawberry dessert; and the famous, grape flavored helium balloon.

Listing the dish above is like trying to describe the Sistine Chapel to someone; the description may be correct but the words do no justice to the artistic presentation that comes forward. Some of my most memorable savory dishes included the peeled tomato with the gazpacho and liquid nitrogen crumble, the kuzu soup, the mashed potato, and the Manchego cheese baguettes. 

Just like the exterior of the building and the entrance, there is always something more, a new idea about to emerge from everything on the table. Remember the stainless steel bowl of oranges: as they placed our gazpacho dishes down, they poured a teapot filled with Sosa essential oils into the bowl of oranges and beautiful orange aromas danced around us and infused our taste buds.

Another favorite was the arrival of the black bass and shellfish kuzu soup. It reminded me of my trip to Thailand and their amazing flavors in each dish. The soup was placed on the table along with a large bucket of salt that was lit on fire and burned a beautiful charcoal smell while we were eating. After the fire went out, the waiter revealed a potato that has been cooking under the salt, inside the fire the whole time. He then mashed the potato, added some beautiful truffles to it and chives on top. It was the most amazing potato I ever tasted.

Our last savory dish was described as the introduction to sweet and combined both of the two in the most unique way. A piece of turbot was smoked and came with crunchy black rice on top. Also, included on the dish were various sweets on the side including pineapple and hearts of palm. An amazing transition from savory to sweet. I was most impressed with the “vanilla bean” delivered to the table in a jar. The appearance was “vanilla bean” but the taste, as described by the waiter, was “think slim jim”. As someone who does not eat meat, I honestly thought it was beef by the texture and taste. I was assured it was not, it was amazing.

The sweet dishes were the epitome of gastronomy. The first dish was a ‘rock’ filled with chocolate ganache alongside sweet potato ice cream, and matcha. The texture and combination of flavors was outstanding. The following dish was described to us as “nostalgia”, it was a combination of childhood flavors including bubble gum, cake, and strawberry with banana ice cream and cherry flavored glass. Each piece of ‘bubble gum’ was frozen with nitrogen oxide and each bite released a strong bubble gum flavor that was reminiscent of youth.

As we were finishing this dish they came over with their famous edible balloons. We were instructed to place our mouths on the balloons and lightly suck in the air in and then eat the string afterwards. After watching other people get the sticky sugar on their glasses, hair, and face, we were careful to eat the balloon.

I have eaten at a number of restaurants that include tasting menus. Sometimes the dinner can feel like an eternity but this meal lasted a little less than 3 hours, but seemed to go by rather quickly. We never waited more than 15 minutes between each course.

I was able to engage the incredibly attentive staff a few times and while they were friendly and cordial, it was obvious they were there to do things in a systematic way and were on a timely schedule. Those three men moved around that dining room with ease as if they were part of a choreographed dance. Nothing ever seemed out of place.

I was told by a few people who ate at Alinea before their 2016 renovation that the dining room was incredibly quiet and the atmosphere was stoic. That was not the case during this visit. It was lively and comfortable and the conversation was enjoyable but not overwhelming.

The vorfreude I had before arriving to Alinea was fulfilled by the actual experience. This is an amazing restaurant filled with surprised. The food was incredible, the atmosphere was comfortable and the overall experience was worth the wait.

I asked if Chef Grant was in the kitchen and was told he was at the restaurant for the past two weeks, but was gone again to open the Aviary at the Mandarin Oriental in New York City (http://www.aviarynyc.com/). I was fortunate enough to finish dinner at Alinea and go to the Aviary in Chicago for a flight of three amazing cocktails. Not to overshadow this meal, the review of the Aviary will follow.

#Alinea #Gastronomy #GrantAchatz #Worlds50best #MolecularGastronomy #Chefstable

Vorfreude (German): “the joyful, intense anticipation that comes from imagining future pleasures.” A review of Alinea The Germans have a word (vorfreude, vor-FROY-dah) in their language and its meaning is described as: "the joyful, intense anticipation that comes from imagining future pleasures." Having spoken with executive chefs at different food shows around the country, watching the Netflix series "Chef's Table" repeatedly, and working toward visiting all the 3-Star Michelin restaurants in the United States, the vorfreude surrounding my latest trip to Chicago to eat at Alinea did not disappoint.