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#then it skipped to the next night
nexus-nebulae · 2 years
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ough
#echos#anyway the only reason I'm awake rn is cause i had a semi-nightmare#nothing Bad happened just the leadup to the Bad Things was paranoia inducing enough that i couldn't handle it#i was like. i was staying in a different house. with people i didn't recognize#idk why i was there but i was sleeping in a bedroom that#1) had a very big and easily openable window#2) had TWO doors (one to a hallway one to a joint bathroom connecting to another bedroom)#3) the bathroom door could not be locked#and 4) there were way too many light switches and some of them did not turn on lights.#first night i was there i was so paranoid someone would try to come in#and I'd forgotten to lock the hall door so i was even more nervous#was fine the first night. later the other people in the house tried to get me to use telekinesis that i apparently had#i used it to fuck with a stoplight that was hung up in the house for some reason#made it flick back from red to green really quickly#then it skipped to the next night#i was paranoid that last night people had tried to get in because i saw some weird things#well this night the things happened again#and then people started actually trying to get into my room#the Weird Things were actually signals to other people outside to try and get into my room#and i freaked and went for the light switch by the bathroom door#light switch didn't do shit even though earlier it had#and then suddenly someone tried to come in through the bathroom door#i woke up immediately but was so fucked up on paranoia that i couldn't even go back to sleep#had to grab my phone so that it stopped#brain is still being weird but at least i mostly know what's real and that I'm safe
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dnkinktober day 17: brat (taming)
….except i cannot use a normal color palate for the life of me
#death note#light yagami#and technically if but only a hand:#l lawliet#lawlight#dnkinktober#my art#choking#<-tagging just in case even though he’s technically just holding his face#so yeah no normal colors for me today i’m in the mood for bright things#i should probably tag this as#bright colors#bc i just looked at it w true-tone and it is Bright#since i always seem to do so on artworks i shall tell you about my day#uhhhh nothing much happened but i did plan out a tentative schedule for the spring summer and fall semesters#according to my plan i will be able to graduate at the end of next fall (yay)#and then i will have to figure out where i want to do my masters (not yay)#hmmm other than that i skipped class bc it was on a topic i was going to low-key freak out about and did schoolwork instead#and now i'm tired bc i've gotten ~7 hours of sleep in total these last few nights bc my brain's been v panicky which is stupid but whatever#and it's been so cold. so so cold. i hate the cold#if i have to wake up and get out of bed and i start trembling and shivering i will be v upset the weather should accommodate my tastes imo#but i do get up before sunrise (booo) so i'm like really tired and miserable so it's probably not that bad but i'm a complainer#and complaining is good for u i promise. it's okay to curse the weather for wronging you and being upset that you have too much to do#back to the artwork i didn't know how to show brat(taming) visually but i wanted to do either hair-pulling of some type#like hair pulled neck exposed shirt unbuttoned sexy style w light smirking (<-will still do this btw just for something else)#but to get inspo i went to the first fic that popped up when i searched brat taming and they had someone grab someone's face#and tell them they were a very bad girl or whatever and i was like. hey light yagami is also a very bad girl so this works
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rabdoidal · 2 years
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POV: you’re a knight and the lord you were tasked with being a bodyguard to while you travelled across the continent together has to attend a shitty gala, but he doesn’t want to go without you, so instead he tells everyone he’s sick and gets wine drunk with you while he’s in the tub, and you’re both definitely queer but you’re so repressed that you still can’t figure out if he’s hitting on you or not
🛁 kofi link in bio if you’re feeling generous 🛁
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disposal-blueeee · 10 months
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guess what ! doodles . again
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edgar , nny and devi belong to johnen vasquez (even if i only drew nny and devi at the bottom)
scriabin by zarla-s
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2-wuv · 1 year
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Stupid piece of shit organ fuck you. I am going to smite you. I will rip you to shreds. I am going to have your innards eviscerated with a hot iron. Should that not work I will have you pumped full of Stop Fucking Cramping Forever pills eternally. Fuck you. I hope you die. I hope we both die.
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yaekiss · 1 month
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I wish I could just beam the fic from my brain onto my screen...
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Glub glub motherfucker
- 🐟
And now they're messaging me themselves.
Wonderful.
-D
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firewoodfigs · 10 months
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spooky
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ourskiesaboveus · 21 days
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Hi (: tell me about gods play
okay! it's the project with paya's blessing / the curse
the bulk of the lore was done three years ago and was recorded on a video that now has no audio, so. i'm only going over what i actually solidly have (this is going to be long oops)
there's a world called peripetasmata. kind of. most call it mata, more pious or older folk call it magnam stravi tapetibus pictis (but that's a mouthful and a half). it's a universe that contains countless dimensions within itself, but there are four main dimensions.
simplex timor - basically the tutorial level where everyone starts out. all powers are limited. once you reach a certain level of power, you can leave, but it's harder to return the more powerful you are. even finding it from the outside is difficult, but there have been a few people who have gotten lost who ended up in simplex. it's not actually an independent dimension (it's a part of a larger one), but it's separate and significant enough to be considered one of the main four. there are natural sources of food and water here, but they are scarce.
naturae timor - the larger dimension that simplex is a part of. it's the most populated one, as the people there usually either don't want to bother with leaving or can't navigate between dimensions. it looks like another overgrown Earth, but all naturally growing plants are poisonous. there are ruins of a vague ancient civilization covered in vines. there are patches of fertile land and many pocket realms that hold blessed lands, but it’s a whole dimension so they’re hard to find and often claimed.
ars timor - basically just hell. the dimension with the least people, with a thriving population of firebrands (more on that later) and wild animals with various deadly modifications. most of the dimension is made up of scorched wasteland or glass, with various seemingly man-made structures fused into the ground at an angle. there are settlements and false groves that have sources of food and water.
abyssi timor - a dimension that consists of many floating islands. it is sky and sea in one-- if you fall enough, the air turns thick and cold, and if you swim up enough, the water lightens and warms. it is the most bountiful of the four dimensions, but there are consequently deadlier things that inhabit it. monstrous guardians patrol the void and guard particularly choice islands. there are many temples and religious-looking structures that seem to have been abandoned millennia ago-- many groups end up inhabiting these for the convenience.
so in mata there are powers and magic and all that fancy stuff. the origin of all that are the "gods" of the universe. i am saying "gods" in quotation marks because they are... complicated. not all of them are quite the same thing.
they are called "patrons". why? well, because they grant power to "protégés" in order to increase their own powers. a combination of faith, story, and literal fuel (physical or magical) keeps them running and growing. the proportions vary based on the patron.
there are quite a few, but i'll go over some more plot-relevant or interesting ones
patriarch yaamin / "paya" - a humanoid patron that vaguely resembles an angel, if angels had no eyes and were fully covered in golden ring-like marks.
his followers (who call themselves "the living") view him as a god. this is strange, as no other faction views patrons as true gods-- most are split between seeing them as spirits or as particularly advanced creatures, still as mortal as the rest. the only other patron with a following that views him as god-like intentionally cultivates his image to be so, and even then he can't achieve the level of piety that paya invokes. it's a combination of his gold and white angel imagery along with the fact that he really doesn't interact with humans much
also his didn't cultivate his following on purpose. reverie (another patron, not relevant) did it on a whim, partially as a favor. he could not care less about the living, but he won't actively do anything about them, as they do help him out through their faith.
his protégés don't get any higher level of regard either. in fact, he doesn't even choose them. instead, he plants "shrines" around mata that designate the first person to encounter them as his protégé.
here are the requirements to be paya's protégé:
not already a protégé or sought after by someone else
see above
the reason that this method works out for him is because of his unorthodox way of granting powers to his protégés. while most other patrons see their patronage as some sort of investment in the person, paya doesn't care about the people he grants power to because they aren't supposed to be particularly long lived.
instead of indirectly granting powers via something like a contract, he directly fuses a fragment of his essence with his protégés. this leads to stronger magic overall, but the human body isn't meant to contain that type of power. it takes time to fully process the fragment and completely realize your potential. however, that comes with drawbacks. since paya is obviously stronger than a normal human, as you gain more access to his power, his power gains access to you. your body morphs to become more like his-- gold rings spread across your body starting from your left or right hand (it depends on what you used to touch the shrine, doesn't necessarily need to be the hand) and your eyes lose function and twist. as the process goes on, you experience personality changes, memory loss, decline of finer motor skills. eventually, you become fully taken over and become a mindless beast. they're referred to as "blessed spirits" by the living and "golden" by most other people. they're basically wandering boss monsters that attack anything that doesn't hold part of paya's power and that doesn't visibly outclass them. their presence warps the world, spreading paya's influence and infecting plants and animals with his golden rings. when they die, paya gets that bit of essence back and starts the process over again. paya benefits twofold from this-- he siphons energy from the souls they release and he gains power from his infection being spread.
how powerful the golden are depends on their compatibility with paya's essence. their behaviour depends on mostly the mental strength/state of the person who was infected. they can range to completely bestial and mindless to humanoid with some memories and free will. being golden only means that you've fully adapted to paya's essence-- you're at the peak of your power. the state is variable to an extent. if you keep your mind when you turn golden, you can still lose everything if you stop fighting. you can't get better, only maintain your state or worsen.
paya's protégés often try to isolate themselves from others for obvious reasons, especially later on. there is, however, one group of late-stage protégés (the sunmarked) that band together to protect themselves and others. there are two measures they take to do so.
there is a certain kind of gemstone-- "oryxian gems"-- that delay the adaptation process. (they're part of the influence of another patron.) without them, the process takes about a month to complete, but with them, the process can be slowed by up to five years, depending on when they're first used.
they've developed a technology that kills people as soon as they fully turn golden. there are collars that the sunmarked wear in their final weeks that siphon paya's essence from them and converts it to usable form as soon as it's fully expressed. this kills them, as at this point in the process, their soul and body are too connected to the essence to survive without it. typically, sunmarked go out with a bang by fulfilling a particularly hard task with the enormous amount of power they have before they die
the sunmarked are lead by darren annin, a sunmarked perpetually frozen at the final stage of development. he claims that he found a particular flower that saved him from falling. (in reality, he's completely golden, just with enough mental strength and an anchor to keep his free will. he doesn't tell anyone else because he doesn't want to risk others trying to save themselves and fail-- few people are aware that golden can keep any part of their minds at all)
the angel's blessing (paya's patronage) grants the afflicted with a great variety of powers that increase as time goes on. varying levels of invulnerability, night vision, holy and nature magic, and more!
RIOT - a demon-esque patron that kind of looks like hoopla? like the pokémon? he's made up of several floating parts-- a one-eyed, horned head, many limbs, and a screen in the place of a torso. each of his limbs has an eye on them
RIOT is not an infection like paya-- he feeds off of strong negative emotions. things like shock, fear, anger, et cetera.
he is the patron that interacts with humans the most. while other patrons inhabit their own locked dimensions and mostly descend in incarnations or visions, RIOT mostly hangs out in ars timor and often ventures out into the other three main dimensions to wreak havoc. people try their best to avoid him.
RIOT usually sets up elaborate spectacles in order to horrify people. if you see a random circus or theatre where there hadn't been one before, probably don't go there! he delights in specialized torment served to a wide audience, like one of those death games with your personal secrets up for grabs. he's a riot.
his relationship with his protégés is more standard-- a contract signed. he grants them magic and the ability to feed as he does in exchange for a certain amount of power a month. it's like they're renting
if they can't pay up, he takes the payment directly from them. if it ends up being a reoccurring thing, he destroys the contract and his former protégé.
his protégés are called "firebrands" (see, it did come back up) and usually work alone. particularly successful firebrands can become almost as powerful as the sunmarked! his only standards for decision are "look fun", but to be fair, he eliminates everyone who doesn't meet his expectations, so he doesn't need to be that discerning with the process.
firebrands get: extra limbs (optional), limited tracking (enhanced awareness of emotion around you), dark and illusion magic, limited mind reading
the untitled - just humanoid. this man is a normal guy. there are times when he looks like a biblical seraphim, but that's just a guise to intimidate
he goes by the untitled and doesn't reveal his name under normal circumstances but i'm not going to write it out every time sorry. his name is heun. (he thinks it is, anyway.)
heun is a transmigrator, a sad victim of truck-kun. he was an ordinary office worker who read trash webnovels before getting distracted in the road and getting run over by a truck. fortunately, mata's creator understood how tropes work and shuttled him over to mata with a system like the ones in the webnovels he read!
he's the weakest of the patrons and the others mostly look down on him, but his system protects him enough that no one outright tries to get rid of him.
his protégés are the strongest. no question. though they start out relatively weak, he keeps a personal eye on them and they're able to grow pretty quickly. he only invests in one protégé at a time, and always a low number (i'll get into that later), so though he's the weakest, he's able to put everything he's got into his heroes.
heun mostly subsists off of the legends of his heroes past and rewards from his system when his current hero achieves certain goals.
he has a decent following that see him as a sort of god-- they await his prophecies and follow his hero whenever they are designated. though they view him as god-like, they see the other patrons as nothing more than spirits, in contrast to the living who see all other patrons as gods, though fallen ones.
his following is cultivated by his system. to be perfectly honest, he'd be nothing without it, but where's the fun in that?
he's extremely lax with his protégés. he's like a dad who strives to be your best friend above all else
his heroes can eventually get partial invulnerability, any magic affinity, summoning abilities, flight, shapeshifting, the works. he's experimented with martial arts and standard wuxia leveling as well.
alright this is getting too long. i only got through the men i'm so sorry women and cool guys i'll get you next time. paya why do i have so much on you i even omitted some stuff for time reasons.
okay! more about the actual story itself and related tidbits
alright so what was i talking about with the low number thing? well, mata, believe it or not, has a rather high death rate. and it has a rather small population of humans, as least for the space they have. and mata never came with humans pre-stocked, as it were.
enter the sacrifices !!
100 of them a year are imported directly to mata in groups of 10. (1000 in the first year.) the reason why they are sacrificed is. complicated but long story short they're from a post-apocalyptic world and it's part of an agreement to sustain their communities.
each person in a group of ten gets a number from 1-10. this number is pretty much random, and everyone gets their own number. numbers obviously repeat across groups, but that doesn't matter.
this number shows the order you will die in. 10 is the first to go, 1 is the last. this is why heun chooses low numbers for his chosen ones.
the count in one group does not affect others-- it isn't the case that all 10s must go before 9s can die.
obviously, knowing the order in which you die is helpful. in the early stages, groups protect their higher numbers and sent out lower numbers to do riskier jobs. the person designated with the number 10 is not often allowed to do much. it doesn't guarantee safety, as you could easily be stuck in a near-death state, waiting for all higher numbers to die before you are released from your suffering, but it's better than nothing.
there are a couple cases where higher numbers are captured and forcibly kept alive in order to preserve a lower number from their group, but those cases are pretty rare.
numbers cannot be fully concealed using things like gloves or long sleeves. they must be open enough to be recognizable as their numeral and no other. if they are not, the number can and will show through clothing.
you cannot tell when higher numbers in your group die, so it's common for numbers close to each other to stay in contact even if they split up. it's just polite. of course, as time goes by, fewer people remember to do so, as they blend into new communities and become detached from their original group. who cares if you can die or not? you should live the same either way, and the end will catch up eventually, so keep the mystery as you would in the original world.
no force can counteract the numbers. it's just not done. there have been patrons that have tried, but to no avail.
y'know what this is too long. i'll keep this post to just these bits of worldbuilding and maybe have another post with story and the actual characters in the story. oops
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assaultvvyvern · 8 months
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hey european friends. we can all agree we won't fucking watch/share eur0vision stuff next year since they are sponsored by a genocider "nation" right? right???
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megaawkwardhuman · 8 months
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cringetober day 17: fake anime screenshot
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... let's close our eyes and act like this looks more anime like than it does
ok? ok
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anaalnathrakhs · 3 months
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people won't fucking FORGET me i can't handle this anymore there's always a friend who wants to go someplace a friend who needs someone to go to the store with a friend who hasn't seen me in a while who wants to hangout, and i can't let those friendships decay i just can't i can't be this kind of asshole again, but it feels so shit it feels like i can't fucking relax cuz there's always something tomorrow something next week and something to do at school between classes and holy SHIT leave me ALONE please fucking stop talking to me i just want to relax and do things i enjoy.
#part of that is of course that ''going home'' isn't relaxing it's just waiting around for the next big anxiety-inducing event#and weekends aren't relaxing either because it's just more parent time#i do think my social battery would increase a little if i ever fucking get to live alone finally#but in the meantime i'm stuck doing community service because if i don't then nobody will#i can't refuse to do something helpful or nice for people when the alternative is going to binge and hate myself in my room#i just want to be far far away so badly#then i'll have an excuse#im well and truly stuck. either i go and i have a dreadful time before during and after.#or i don't and im missing out and im an awful friend.#before you hit me w the ''you're allowed to skip on an event your friends won't hate you!!!!''#i want to skip ALL OF THEM#and friendships are watered like plants okay my friends are legitimate not being friends w somebody who never hangs out#jesus christ i want a pause button i want to be stuck in a time loop for a little while#thinking about tomorrow makes me want to rope#i can go to school 9am to 3pm. but technically there's no class.#then my friend wants to go to the night museums for her birthday#which leaves like. five hours at least in the middle. in which we'll have to hang out.#and she wants to get food.#if at any point of that i go home it's the day my mom doesn't work so. i have to spend some more incredibly unsatisfactory time with her.#god it's making me want to rope even more than usual#vent#broadcasting my misery
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real-life-cloud · 8 months
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I found an old fidget spinner and I've been using it (it's been very nice ^_^) but I forgot !!!! It's glow in the dark !!!!!!!!!!!!!!
#the sky speaks#literally incredible#its nice for restless energy tho i hav so much of it rn i wanna hop skip n jump#just saw my mom a couple hrs ago#it went good !#shes doing okay in the rehab place. better than the last place she went to but theres atill been drama#and theyre pretty understaffed#but nice :)#my weekedn is PACKED!!#tomorrow i work at the zoo then friday im going to fright night#then saturday is visitation for mom again and afterwards is thomas and carries bday party#then Sunday im going to thomas and carries AGAIN to play minecraft togwther#OH and friday i also am going to my moms job#next weekend is packed too dear gdo#and i wanted to open commissions gdi. not gonna happen for a while im afraid#maybe in december ?#ive barely been drawing#too busy#not enough energy to be creative. mainly been playing chill games and reading fanfic ij my downtime#oh i also had my last session w my therapist today! shes having her baby soon so i wont see her til after the new year.... kinda sad tbh#i came out to her as trans last week and we talked abt it some today tho!!! it was rly nice i had never talked abt it out loud before#felt lighter afterwards. she told me to write down everything so i can organize my thoughts better when i tell my parents#bc i wanna tell them at some point. i RLY want a breast reduction dear god. and ive gone back and forth on hrt. still contemplating it#sometimes dad will call me his 'favorite son' as a joke when i help with like. yard work or handy stuff. makes me happy#he sorta knows im gender fluid but not totally?#im juat rambling at this point. goodnight everybody 😴
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a-chaotic-dumbass · 3 months
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my mildly hot take is that i dont like dany's chapters that much. i like dany i like jorah i like the dragons but theyre so far away from westeros that i cant be assed to care
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gaskarth-omg · 15 days
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i love my boyfriend so much and i cry every week the first night we’re apart since we can only see eachother weekends because he lives 2 hours from me and i’m in the process of crying rn i miss him so much but i wish i didn’t have to go through this pain every week my heart aches for him and physically hurts because of how much i miss him and the thought of him not being here with me keeps crossing my mind and making things worse does anyone have any tips for me please it’s unbearable and i deal with it weekly
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