#these hoes goddamn it

[dapper-lil-arts]

Anyone else surprised that Rarity has zero bitches in cannon

[loaksbitch]

y’all be fucking ready cause i’m writing to most forbidden, rough-ish sex turning to love making, sluttiest, puthy throbbing stepdad!jake sully smut ever – idk tho if i should post tonight or tomorrow 🤭 do lmk babies ‼️

[3moghost]

thank the wiki editors for including the rewards, otherwise it'd have taken my indecisive ass forever to make a choice

[hellshire-harlot]

I swear to god the Resident Evil fandom has like. Five jokes total. And we won’t shut up about them.

Jill Sandwich (classic but very overdone)

Seven Minutes (I’m so sick of this line fr)

Chris punching a boulder (we’re right to meme on that honestly)

Lady Dimitrescu (Most of those jokes are pretty gross actually)

Where’s Everyone Going? (Bingo?)

[kittiegun]

the hatzgang are drawn with disgustingly big heads and im tired of hiding it.

seriously the shapes are so clashing and dont fit together at all (not to mention, inaccurate?? super inaccurate)

robert looks like a thumb. his head is shaped like a thumg LOOK AT THIS SHIT.

HIS FACE IS AN OVAL YOU ASSHEADS!!!

[mxnkeydo]

I FINISHED ATPWH I FINISHED ATPWH I FINISHED ATPWH I FINISHED ATPWH I FINISHED ATPWH I FINISHED ATPWH I FINISHED ATPWH I FINISHED ATPWH I FINISHED ATPWH I FINISHED ATPWH I FINISHED ATPWH

[invinciblerodent]

getting a little bit obsessed with my "cottagecore throuple" here, because the more I think about it, the more disgustingly perfect and idyllic the whole thing is to me.

like... post-game, I like to imagine Shadowheart absolutely thriving. She's a city girl with a deep love for animals, and spotty- to nil memories, most of which are of the worst things to have ever happened in a dank torture-basement: of course a sweet, picturesque forest cottage (so far I like to think that Petyr would call it "The Hovel", even though it's by all means a cozy, nice hunter's lodge) would have her downright giddy, and she deserves every ounce of that happiness ever.

As I imagine it, when not enthusiastically learning all there is to learn about the quasi-self-sustaining life (that she had dropped herself into by shacking up with a literal forest ranger), she spends as much time outside as possible: walks barefoot in the tall grass, stops to smell every flower (and even plants quite a few, just by the vegetables), and lays in the soft underbrush for hours at a time- enjoying the sunlight caressing her face, enjoying a nice novel (and/or a cuddle with Scratch, the cub, or her boyfriend once he sits down for a moment), or just gazing up at the moon and stars in silent worship. She makes friends with every animal that crosses her path, too: SO many potions of animal speaking are consumed, it's absurd. (She's best friends with the chickens. Petyr has to start farming acorn truffles in the basement for her, and that even proves actually very lucrative- in town, that shit sells for like 10-20 gold a pop.)

She'd of course bring home everything that'll let her. Little wildflower bouquets and stuff at first, but also every critter: from juvenile racoons just weaned from their mothers (they look almost like kittens! how cute!), to elderly foxes that just want to curl up in front of the fire and warm their bones somewhere safe for a moment. She's having the time of her goddamn life, she's learning a shitton of life skills she was never taught (finally learning things not meant to make her better at hurting people!), and generally enjoying a life that, while still plagued by remnants of the past (night terrors, perpetrator trauma, loss, grief, pains both suffered and inflicted, all that great stuff), has her feeling actually content with her lot in it.

And with all this, Petyr is... very business as usual, or at least he's trying to pretend that he is. Having someone in what was his space for like 20 years is strange initially, but if there's one thing he's used to, it's adapting. Making things work. (Plus, he's like, happy, or whatever. In love. You know, that sort of rot.)

Then again, he's also used to only having to feed himself with the very little he has, not another (especially another who is inexperienced at this type of thing, and a second another who just... drops by sometimes, always unannounced and unexpected, but never unwelcome), which deep down does have him a bit (a lot) more antsy about not just being the self-appointed guardian of her happiness, but also just... their general survival.

He's keenly aware that winters in the wild are never especially easy, not when you're so far removed from the safety of a community- especially not the way he's used to being alone, without even magic to keep you warm and safe. Usually, he spends most of the year primarily occupied by preparing for winter, and even like that, there have been lean years: years when he got snowed in for tendays, when he did something stupid and all the careful prep went down the shitter, years he had to go hungry and learn to make do with next to nothing.

So he compensates for- (and distracts himself from-) that anxiety by making extra sure that the pantry is stocked to bursting with all the goods there can be, and they often head out into the woods to hunt and forage together- although he's not a great (or even a good) teacher, Shadowheart (usually Shadow, often Heart, lately Jen or Jenny in affection) does make what he used to do out of sheer need, into something also done for fun.

Hunting and foraging are fun now, and soon, the cabinets are overflowing with jars and jars of dry mushrooms, so much homemade deer jerky, jams and jellies and pickles galore... there's mead fermenting, and homemade soap curing before it can be used, firewood stacked to the height of a person... herb bundles, garlic braids, grain corn, and drying peppers are strung up on the rafters like fragrant fairy lights.

Meanwhile, I imagine that Halsin comes and goes as he pleases- not entirely unlike a beloved stray cat. He just shows up one evening as if he had left not tendays, but only a few hours ago, kicks the duff or mud or snow off his boots, and leans his staff into its habitual nook by the door. He sets whatever it is that he brought this time in its appropriate place (be it otherwise unobtainable goods from town, or just a little gift, a treat to enjoy together), and he sinks into the worn-out armchair by the fireplace that was declared his the first time he stayed.

One of the others almost always then strolls by to settle wordlessly on his lap (if not both of them- that poor chair can barely take the combined weight), and just relax as his big, warm fingers slowly work through the knots and ties keeping their hair out of their faces, and, voice rumbling deep in his chest, he tells them all that has happened in Reithwin the past while.

The many smells of dinner and the comforting scent of pipe tobacco mingle with the fragrant herbs and the crackling fire then, and creates something that can only be described as the scent of home.

.............. and then all three just fuck absolute NASTY every day, in every configuration, and on every surface available for the next, oh, month or so.

[masochismustango]

Y’kno, sometimes it’s hella fun to be me, because I’ve just realized that these men look pretty similar to each other being completely different in case of their personalities

I was literally walking backwards and forwards when I suddenly got it, lol

[sethdomain]

Some of you acts like evil minor muahahaha proship guy when you found out someone under 18 is watching the hazbrow hoe tell that criticizes the show in any way or shape

[corpsentry]

just finished episode 52 of xinghancanlan and i’m about to rip zisheng a real one. oh niaoniao you cannot let him back in GO OFF WITH YUAN SHANJIAN HE MAY HAVE A POTTY MOUTH BUT HE is literally just hanging out…. and hang out forever he will by ur side if u just let the guy. pov i am deeply angry on shaoshang’s behalf (i am her dad or her boyfriend)

[manyblinkinglights]

Like I get tarping a bed (bed is square, tarp is square) if there’s gonna be watersports type activities but if you care about the couch then don’t fuck wet on it! WHAT is this in-between putting a small tarp down for the hoes situation. They weren’t even that oily.

[yostresswritinggirl]

hi twinnieee!! this is tofu :)) how have you been? i hope you've been well and happy!!

i'm just here to let you know that i'm applying for UPCAT since it's applicable for me now and i'm still planning on taking psychology, if not philosophy. although it's a pre-law for me now because i want to be a lawyer. haha crazy because i only planned on psychology because of you and had a full-length plan on becoming a forensics psychology ever since you mentioned that course ^^ i'm not expecting that i will pass since i know that the exams will be hard but i will try (iskolar ng bayan pls) (if hindi pumasa hello green school live jesus in our hearts forever na anthem ko hanggang mamatei)

anywayss, i just want to thank you because if not for you, i wouldn't dream of going to UP and i wouldn't dream of taking psychology ^^ i might be somewhere deep into doing something i don't even want so thank you a lot haha (im sorry im becoming sentimental its just that i was doing my applications earlier and then i thought of you and then stared at the wall) and also i'm turning 18 this year :')) the 18 plan has been out of the window ever since and i always remember your words, and i have more things to plan and look forward to <33

thank you again!! you were and always will be such a huge source of comfort and inspiration for me <33 i appreciate you and everything that you do. please continue on being a kind and good person that you are and i hope that you'll only have happiness and love !!

TWINNIE, TOFU, HOLY FUC

It's already been that long omayghad aldbdowkl it's finally here oh I'm so anxious and excited and so EVERYTHING for you right now! You're gonna do great, remember my points, and even if you don't it doesn't always mean you did bad! Make sure to add two choices for your course and remember that if you get in to your second choice, you can still shift - and if you don't get in, you can repeal with any of the campus but you CAN'T change campuses if that's the case. UPCAT is all about strategies and also a bit of chance with the slots, take it in stride whatever outcome you get!

I can't believe - I didn't know how much that meant to you and I had to take a bit of a break after seeing all of this because I've been just hit with the feels and couldn't form words, twinnie 😭out of all the things, a lawyer - actually you're a very strong-minded and willed individual that knows where their heart is and stands by it, you're going to do so many great things! Psychology or lawyer!

Thank you as well, you have no idea how much I love you as my twinnie and friend in my journey in this hellsite hgnhnghg gigil *ruffles your hair* thank you for remembering me in a good light and aaaa advanced happy 18th! Celebrate it however you like there will always be more birthdays and more chance for greater celebrations!

I can't stop saying thank you - but thank you so much for this message twinnie, I really needed that. And as for you, I really do hope you get into UP so that you can focus on your studies while having fun in such an environment that I know you'll thrive and grow in, but my greatest advice is to just keep being you and keep moving forward towards the thing you love and believe in. Surround yourself with the people and things you love and your kindness and goodness I know and love will shine through naturally and just as much :')

[cow-tag]

Squints at my screen

Is this what was wsnted?

[konstya]

gum is my worst enemy

[astras-ender]

i am totally normal about this

[lemonlovemeanslove]

The more I think about it the more upset I get at how badly I was treated by my first employer. She was such a racist piece of shit. A UNBELIEVABLE controlling mother, unbelievably (Gilmore girls being her favoriteeeee show is so on the nose it feels like parody) all she did was look down on the middle east, the culture, it's people, the religion. Every aspect was mocked and belittled in her oh so annoying I'm a well educated English white woman voice.

So I grew up in the middle east right, THIS is my home, and here, in my home, throwing away good food isn't just frowned upon, it's a pretty big fucking sin. And I was the baby sitter for her kid right (who had ZERO friends btw bc her mother isolated her and spoiled her to the point where no other child could stand her company) and she was about the throw away a ice cream we just got bc she didn't want it anymore and I go to stop her, and tell her well now we shouldn't throw away food like that it's wasteful, you don't have that must left. It's not like I was gonna force her to eat it I just wanted her to stop and think about it, about wasting food and what it means, which she very obviously hadent been taught to do, and this psycho mother grabs it from her hand and tosses it in the trash, then goes to preach "well I've raised my kid not to treat her own body like a trash can blablabla" And I give this bitch a are you fucking serious look bc NOT EVEN 5 MINUTES AGO she looked at one of the cleaning crews that were washing the pavement and sighs and goes "these people" are so irresponsible and WASTEFUL don't they care about the environment smh smh. And I was like well...they have to clean it, we all need it to be clean bc we all need to use it and its not like they control how much water is being used like it's a bit much to demand which pisses her of right bc how dare u question me little brown child. Any fucking ways this also serves as example 12531 of how white people will cry about "environmental activism" before they ever check their own rasism (the irony here what with the connections of white supremacy and environmentalism is so obvious I don't really have to point it out but still)