#these little guys were always my favorite heartless

[pshcomforts]

➳ shameless | psh.

highschool!sunghoon x fem!reader

“there’s just inches between us”

synopsis: you and sunghoon are academic rivals, always going head to head.

warnings/content: written in third pov. cursing. not proofread. sexual tension. kind of suggestive? a little bit of idiots in love. sunghoon gets jealous.. and possessive? reader’s always late to class but somehow still has the best grade. (this one’s my favorite so far)

comments, likes, and reposts are appreciated :)

word count: 3.9k

༘˚⋆𐙚｡masterlist⋆.✧˚

a/n: fictional characters — dae (jungwon’s partner), min-su (heeseung’s partner), and ji-woo (jake’s partner).

current song playing: shameless by camila cabello

↻ ◁ II ▷ ↺

2:35 ──────────────|───── -1:04

another day, another struggle of being late to class.

y/n sighed as she checked her phone for the time.

[ 10:42am ] — it read. she felt her heart weigh down at the given time. “fucking late again..,” she groaned while speed walking her legs to class. an unusual amount of notifications blew up her silenced phone, indicating that her friends were questioning her whereabouts.

“come on, i gotta make it.” the girl harshly huffed in quiet and unsteady breaths. “mr. lee’s gonna kill me.”

in minutes, she found herself booming through the door with only deep breaths audible. [ 10:56am ] — her phone beamed.

“made it..,” she murmured through her harsh gasps for air.

“y/n, you made it!” yelled her friend, dae, who had widened eyes. “well to second period but..”

“y..yeah, hold on… give me a second.” her hands smacked down on his desk as her head lowered with exhaustion.

dae giggled at her state. “did you run here?”

“i basically did!” she yelled out, causing him and their two other friends — min-su and ji-woo to laugh as well.

“you’re who i have to beat and yet you can’t even get to class on time?” a voice from behind jerkily snorted.

y/n’s head instantly bolted up at that familiar, stupid tone she could easily recognize. “shut the hell up, park. you’re here more than me and yet your scores are lower, you really wanna mention who’s beating who?” she shot back with an intense glare.

her rival, sunghoon, only chuckled in a laugh at her words. “your score was lower than mine last test, second place. i don’t think you should be talking either.” he let a stupidly handsome smirk tug onto his lips.

she rolled her eyes, blood beginning to boil the more she looked at him. “who’s grade is higher hm? exactly.” the girl uttered, before turning her full back to him.

she heard him humor a chuckle before giving a faint ruffle to her hair. “we’ll see about that, nerd.” her hands went to the messy strands, huffing out an annoyed sigh as he left with a playful smile plastered.

her friends giggled at their relationship.

“girl, you and sunghoon need to get together already.” ji-woo chimed with a teasing grin.

y/n’s face morphed into disgust before furiously shaking her head. “are you crazy?? i could never be with someone like him.”

“your dynamic is cute though. a little disgusting, but cute.” min-su added in, shrugging her shoulders afterward.

“puh-lease. he hates me and i hate him, nothing could change that.”

dae’s brows slightly raised. “mhm… okay..,” he murmured.

“look, just because you guys are dating his friends, that doesn’t mean i should date him. he’s too much of an asshole anyway, who would even like him?”

she would. the girl was in complete denial, turning all her confused love into misdirected fuel for competition.

he was a distraction and she made sure she’d always see it that way. he couldn’t possibly differ her from the strong perspective she had of him being the hot, asshole nerd he was.

he was attractive, maybe a little too attractive; but his personality couldn’t agree with that. as her academic rival, he joked and played around with her, enjoying the little reactions he could get out of the cold, heartless girl.

but she couldn’t say she liked the teasings she’d receive from him. she could never admit to it because no matter how appealing he’d may be, he was still competition.

“well we’re not saying you should-“

ji-woo’s words were cut off by the entrance of mr. lee and their widely known friend, jay.

heads were turned and confused faces had morphed in onto each student.

“class, this is park jongseong from mr. yang’s class. he’s transferred to ours so his schedule can fit a few other classes, please welcome him,” he announced to everyone.

y/n’s eyes twinkled with delight at the sight of her friend who was awkwardly waving to his new peers. “hello..,” she heard him beam with a smile.

“you’re welcome to choose whichever empty seat you’d like. i’d suggest sitting next to either of my top two students, y/n,” mr. lee pointed to her, “or sunghoon. both are great choices to choose for catching up with our class.”

given that jay was a friend of both, he remained a little unsure before ultimately deciding to sit next to y/n.

he placed himself on the right side of her, giving sunghoon a clear shot of the two alarmingly close to each other. he let a puff of air slip by his lips as he subtly rolled his eyes.

“could’ve sat next to me but chose to sit next to that loser?” he silently fumed in his seat, forcing his attention away from the two who were conversing.

sunghoon didn’t know why but his heart was burning, aching almost. he’s never felt this way before. seeing how the girl he attempted to hate smile and smack his friend’s shoulders churned his stomach.

his jaw clenched and his ears fell deaf on everything else once he heard his rival call him — “park.”

“park?? park?” he guffawed with a loud, clear scoff in his throat. “she’s calling him park? my nickname she has for me??”

he angrily folded his arms as he tried to keep himself quiet. his mouth continued to spew out a few other words about her existence, along with some curse words added in for jay’s part before being interrupted — “why are you so loud?”

his head whipped to the right, meeting eyes with his friend, heeseung whose head was laying on the desk. “almost everyone can hear you, hoon. you’re showing that you like her a little too much.” the older male teased with a shit eating grin.

sunghoon exhaled a long breath before uttering a quiet — “shut up” to his friend. just then, a little note was thrown onto his desk, catching his attention.

his head cocked to the side in confusion before turning to the direction of where the paper came from.

in seconds, he found ji-woo’s boyfriend, jake, mouthing ‘open it.’

his hands crumbled it open and found the words — ‘are you jealous?’ — written on it.

hoon’s face immediately wore a frown as his brows furrowed back to his friend. in return, jake motioned for him to write back with his hand doing little scribbly lines.

he groaned out a soft sigh before complying to his friends words. ‘jealous about what?’ he wrote, faking his coy state to hide how he felt.

he gave a harsh toss back to jake, allowing the aussie to open it with a ‘pft’ leaving his lips afterward.

‘don’t act stupid, you’re looking sus ඞ’ — written back to sunghoon.

jake tried to throw it back to him but with such a bad angle toss, it ended up landing on jungwon’s desk.

he cocked a brow at the crumbled paper, opening it to find the two different sets of colored words — red from sunghoon and black from jake.

won turned to sunghoon with an eyebrow raise, giving a quick toss back to him, not before adding in his own input of course.

‘hoon’s jealous? about what? y/n? (⚆ ̫ ⚆)’ — colored blue to the tall boy.

sunghoon gave an annoyed grunt after reading his friend’s words. almost a little too harshly, his hands quickened in a pace before throwing it to jungwon once more.

‘i’m not jealous (ง •̀_•́)ง’— he rolled his eyes at his confirmation. “me? jealous?” he quietly scoffed in disbelief.

before he could toss it to jungwon’s desk, a snatch from the right was made to the paper, indicating that heeseung had caught on to their little game.

he crumbled it open, raising his brows and widening his eyes in amusement. sunghoon softly sighed as he watched the older male start writing as well. “great.. heeseung’s in on this now too.” he whispered under his breath.

min-su’s boyfriend finished his thought and gracefully threw it to jake. ‘he’s such a liar, i heard him just minutes ago talking about them (ఠꍓఠ)’ — heeseung wrote in green.

the younger boy silently laughed, widening his bright smile as he scribbled a few words back. ‘hoonie has a crush (ꗞ _ ꗞ)’ — he threw to y/n’s rival.

sunghoon opened the note before rolling his eyes and clenching his already-tense jaw. his hand wrote out his thoughts, pen undeniably denting the paper in frustration.

the passing of the note went around the four for a while, eventually reaching niki and sunoo as well; jay staying mindless to all of it because well, he was still talking to y/n.

the two conversing and turning to one another for a peer talk was the view from sunghoon’s perspective.

soon enough, mr. lee caught on as well, and just with luck on its side, sunghoon was the one to be seen with the passed note.

“one of my star students? really?” the teacher uttered in a slight scoff.

hoon’s head instantly lowered at the obvious disappointment present in his teacher’s tone. he’s never felt this sort of fizzling letdown before and he didn’t know how to take it.

“what? no, i-“ he tried to justify, only to be cut off by mr. lee — “i’m fairly disappointed, sunghoon. i expected more.”

everyone’s eyes were on him and all he could do was have an embarrassing amount of blush on his cheeks.

“you’ll serve detention for disrupting my class after school today. see me then.”

his head lowered even more, avoiding the judgmental stares received from his peers.

a snicker then came from the direction of where his rival was at. a poorly hidden snicker at that.

y/n softly snorted out laughter, hands attempting to cover her mouth but doing it very horribly with the fact that her worst enemy was just embarrassed.

sunghoon shot a glance to her, teary eyes narrowing at the girl before shifting to jay who was trying to quiet her down. there it was again. his heart painfully throbbed at how his friend interacted with her.

“well if you think it’s so funny y/n, you can join sunghoon for detention as well,” mr. lee spat to her.

almost immediately, her eyes widened at his words. “what?? but-“

“can’t wait,” he intruded with a push to his glasses. “would anyone else like to join my two students who i thought were my academic weapons before i return back to this lesson? no? okay, let’s proceed.”

min-su, ji-woo, dae, and the rest of the enhypen members avoided eye contact from the two

y/n fumed in her seat, grumbling out quiet curse words to herself as she rolled her eyes. “he gets in trouble but i somehow get sucked in? pft, asshole.” she mumbled, putting the blame on him even though it was her own fault.

from the back, hoon placed his hand over his mouth to cover himself from sneering a laugh. sure, he hated the fact that he was about to spend more time with the girl he hated (liar), but he felt satisfied that she got in just as much trouble as him. then the thought of having to see her again clouded his head, and it pissed him off once more.

karma really was a bitch.

.　 . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆

hours passed through the school day, and ms. choi was the last and final teacher.

with just a few minutes left, she caught everyone’s attention. ”your tests have finally been graded, so scores will be out soon. please look out for it on the bulletin board when you get the chance.” she said, giving an approval head nod seconds after the bell rang to head over.

students scattered around to the bulletin board, little pushes and shoves were made as most of y/n’s friend group rushed for their score.

“a 95! yes!” screamed ji-woo.

“92! i can live with this,” dae pointed out.

“93! holy shit, i passed!” min-su yelled.

y/n’s eyes widened. “97?? OH MY GOD! i actually passed! all that hard work paid off!” she shouted, jumping up and down in glee.

the academic group cheered together, giving hops in their designated stance all at once. they circled around, still in oblivious glee before y/n had come in contact with sunghoon’s score.

68.

her heart dropped a little for him. she immediately stopped her jumps and examined the paper.

eight rankings.. the boy went down by eight rankings, no longer being her competition for now.

she didn’t know how to feel. for as long as she could remember, they’d been going head to head for first place, and now she’s got the upper hand.

y/n was finally in the lead and for once, sunghoon wasn’t the runner up.

her eyes continuously looked over at his score. she couldn’t even lie, she’d be in distress if her score went low like that.

‘wait- no way i feel bad for him?? i should be happy that i’m finally rank one by myself.’ she thought, scoffing in disbelief with how she almost felt sympathetic for a jerk named sunghoon. but she’d understand him — the disappointed looks from his family, the eating guilt from doing bad, the expectations to never failing again — she knew what it was like.

and it was then that y/n shifted her attention from her friends to across the hall where he was. her heart instantly thumped in pity as she watched his strikingly, attractive face turn sour with every step he took.

the look of disappointment was clear in his facial expression, and she could see it herself. she almost wore a frown when watching him slowly disassociate from his conversation with the enhypen members — something that only she noticed.

the girl watched him excuse himself to leave, then it clicked into her head that she had detention with him.

“aw fuck!” she cursed aloud, catching her friend’s attentions.

“what?” asked ji-woo with a head tilt.

“she has detention with sunghoon,” jake chimed from behind, slinging an arm around his girlfriend.

min-su and dae snickered in laughs before y/n exhausted a groan. “shut up!” she yelled to them.

“have fun,” min-su’s boyfriend, heeseung, teased with a sly smile.

“you know she won’t baby,” his girl intervened, following his smile and mirroring the evil grin he had.

the single girl rolled her eyes after noticing their friends link arms with their significant others.

“it’ll be over soon, y/n. just ignore him!” dae yelled. “i mean you could talk to him but..,”

“babe, does it really look like she wants to talk to him?” jungwon asked, planting a soft peck onto his boyfriend’s cheeks afterwards.

“well i’d rather be in there than seeing all this couple stuff.” y/n refuted, huffing out a breath of air before leaving to detention in defeat.

she left the scene, hearing the remaining words of jay scream out — “i’m staying after school for a bit, so say hi if you see me!”

when she approached the class, she felt her heartbeats in her throat. she softly clenched her chest. ‘what is this feeling? pft, this is stupid,’ the girl thought while entering in.

“y/n, good to see you’ve finally arrived on time. take a seat right there,” mr. lee spoke with another push to his glasses.

a red color picked at her cheeks when she met eyes with her arch rival, sunghoon. being announced that she wasn’t late for once in front of the person she hated was way too humiliating.

but then she remembered that he got a low score and she suddenly felt better.

y/n sat across the room from him, making sure that she’d breathe no same air as him. she gave a soft sigh as she checked her phone.

[ 3:17pm ] — it read.

it’s gonna be a long while.

.　 . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆

about an hour passed, and detention was almost over.

the entire time the two were stuck in there, it remained silent. tension filled the air with every quiet glance they could get, every small glimpse they could steal from each other.

a few minutes later, and mr. lee had finally announced they could leave.

“i sincerely hope that my two star pupils won’t disrupt my class again, have a great rest of your day.” he murmured, lips firmly pressed together to emphasize disappointment.

y/n groaned out a sigh once the teacher had made his exit. “finally gonna go home,” she mumbled under her breath.

a clink from behind was made, indicating that sunghoon was still in the class. she gave a quick stink eye and though he couldn’t see it, she felt stupidly proud of herself.

she exited out before he could, head directly staring down onto her phone, causing her face to meet a very broad chest.

y/n shot her head up, expecting to see a stranger but instead saw a familiar face. “oh jay! you stayed!” she yelled.

his face beamed a bright smile before nudging her head. “yeah i had to for a class, how was it spending time with sunghoon?” his brows raised in amusement, enjoying how frustrated she got.

“shut up, park!” she cackled, sending a smile and a smack to him.

it was then that sunghoon’s feet were glued to the ground at the door frame. he seethed through the gaps of air in his teeth. there it was again; that stupid pounding in his heart.

the nickname ‘park’ was in a different sense of tone that he’s never heard before. a playful, sweet tone that set him off in the wrong way.

“park?” he unbelievably scoffed.

he watched the two interact from afar, hearing how they unintentionally flirted with each other was boiling his blood. jealous? no. can’t be.

“are you about to leave?” he heard jay ask her with his infamous smirk.

“yep, just waiting for my brother.” y/n beamed, showing him a bright smile that should’ve been for hoon.

the tall male rolled his eyes. she’s never that nice to him.

“i could take you home if you want?” jay asked, lips pressing into a line.

sunghoon’s heart dropped, sank even. taking her home? his arch rival? hell no.

he stepped into the scene with a firm jaw clench. arms folding in an irritated way, he spoke — “i’m gonna talk to y/n, no need to take her home.”

he stared down at jay, unintentionally burning holes into the boy who had accidentally got involved. no sense of indulging familiarity spoke in his eyes because all he could do was drag his enemy away with a tight grip on her wrist.

hoon brought her to a more secluded area, ignoring her confused whines to let go. he loosened his grip, letting go just to grasp her in his hands again. they dug into her shoulders as he pushed her back against the wall.

he furrowed his brows before keeping his gaze down, avoiding eye contact. y/n didn’t say anything as she stared at him in confusion.

only heavy breaths from him were heard before he angrily spat — “you’re doing this on purpose, aren’t you?”

his teeth gritted, digging his fingers deeper into her shoulders. he didn’t know why he was acting this way. he just couldn’t stand the fact that she was so close to jay after basically spending an entire day together.

y/n’s brows furrowed at his question. “what? what’s wrong with you? i was just talking to jay.”

hoon’s head picked up at her words, finally locking gaze in a softened look she’s never seen before. “does he mean anything to you?” he croaked in a husky voice.

“he’s just a friend. why are you even asking this? you’re not my boyfriend,” the girl scoffed with a slight smile. “you’d like to be though, wouldn’t you?”

“shut up,” he seethed in a stern expression. his softened eyes turned back to a glare. y/n quickly caught onto the pent up frustration in it, hinting that his test score added in on his outburst. “you don’t know how badly i wanted to pull you away from him today, how badly i should’ve shown him that you’re not his.”

sunghoon’s face inched closer to hers, noses delicately coming in contact. she could feel his breath on hers and all she could do was feel physically weak.

“i should’ve huh?” he uttered in a scoff, trailing his gaze from her lips and back to her eyes. “would you have liked that?”

their lips were close to connecting, grazing against each others. she’d pull in but he’d pull away, and when he’d pull in, she’d pull away as well.

✩ ‘i want you to give in, i want you to give in’ ✩

tension raised and so did their body heat. y/n’s hand was firmly pushed on his chest but she didn’t actually push him away, she just liked having the chance to have her hand lay there. she felt her heartbeats get louder within each second, chest heaving at how close he’s been getting.

✩ ‘there is tension between us’ ✩

“this is not like you, sunghoon.” her brows furrowed more. “you can’t be acting like this.”

“i can’t?” he cracked with a shit eating grin. “and why can’t i?”

his head cocked to the side before questioning with his eyes. “isn’t it better for us to act like this than us acting like enemies?” he inched his lips closer once more, letting just heavy breaths be audible to ears.

✩ ‘i just wanna give in’ ✩

y/n’s hands finally pushed against his chest. “control yourself, park. you’re not my boyfriend.” she repeated, face becoming stern.

“control myself?” he laughingly mocked. “you don’t know how much i’ve been doing that in front of you. i’ve been holding myself back this entire time from doing more, and you want me to control myself, now?”

✩ ‘it’s been a secret for the longest time’ ✩

sunghoon’s grip tightened around her shoulders once more, pressing her harder against the wall.

“look at me, pretty girl.” he spoke, letting one of his hands hold onto her chin.

y/n gulped. her heart dropped to the pit of her stomach at the sudden name change. she’s never seen this side of him before. it was new and unfamiliar, and she liked it.

✩ ‘i need you more than i want to’ ✩

hesitantly, she let her eyes fall on him.

he jerkily smiled, enjoying how his academic rival had now fallen under his touch.

“control myself?” sunghoon restated. “fine, i’ll control myself.”

he quickly backed away, grip loosening and letting go. he watched her fall into ease, hands clenching onto her chest to stop her rapid heartbeats.

a sly smirk curled onto his lips as he raised his brows. “see you tomorrow, nerd.” he uttered, walking away soon afterward so he could have the last say.

y/n stayed still in her stance. her sense of touch almost went numb as she tried to process all of what happened.

she suddenly felt her phone buzzing, indicating that her friend group was calling. her brows pinched together before declining the call, and texting that she’d join when she’d get home.

a breath of air left her mouth once she found a text notification from her rival, sunghoon.

park 👎🏼:

Let’s talk soon, pretty girl.

I don’t think I could ever control myself around you.

nothing would ever be the same between the two again.

★・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・★

[cupid-styles]

sunshine girl*

Harry and Daisy decide to go steady, but not everyone is supportive and Daisy's insecurities are starting to get the best of her.

70s!harry and virgin!fmc | Content warnings: outdated views on virginity and the LGBTQ+ community, pubic hair talk (if it's not your thing that's fine!), drugs, smut!!!! (dirty talk, a little bit of anal)

Word count: 6k (a third part is coming!)

Part one |

"Harry, would you mind not groping my best friend when I'm around?"

A furious blush flowers over Daisy neck at Willow's commentary, but Harry simply rolls his eyes. Five years apart, he's used to his sister's relentless teasing and mocking words, but it's a new phenomenon for Daisy. She's accustomed to Willow always being on her side and treating her with love and kindness, regardless of what she's doing or who she' seeing.

It was safe to say that the newfound romance between Daisy and Harry took some getting used to. 

"Willow, would you mind not being such a heartless little brat?" Harry bites, and Willow immediately raises her middle finger to shove in his face. 

"I told you guys, I don't care if you're banging or whatever, just don't do it in front of me."

"Enough," Daisy finally speaks up, leaning forward and shrugging Harry's arm off of her shoulders, "I'm gonna stop hanging out with both of you if you keep freaking out on each other every time we're together."

She stands from the worn couch in Harry and Willow's living room, zeroing in on the siblings.

"Willow, you know we're not 'banging' so stop saying that. Harry, try to control yourself a little better. Hug it out and make up by the time I'm back for the shindig after work, alright?"

They both nod their heads, looking like wounded puppies. They're not used to Daisy taking such a stance, but over the past month, her and Harry have been seeing each other more regularly. They immediately agreed that it was important to let Willow know — neither wanted to hide this from her, and while they hadn't expected her to jump for joy, they had anticipated a bit more support.

Instead, when Daisy and Harry were shuttered away in his bedroom, listening to records and making out, Willow treated her like any other one night stand. She flared her nostrils and made impolite comments, always huffing about the way he touched her, even though they weren't even officially dating. Daisy didn't know what they were, but she did know one thing: She was still a virgin, and it gave her insane amounts of anxiety.

It had nothing to do with how Harry treated her. In fact, he handled her with the utmost amount of respect and sweetness. It had only been a few weeks since their first physical encounter, but even then, he'd been so gentle with her — after he made her cum, he guided Daisy's shaky legs to the bathroom and ran a shower for her. She'd felt awkward about taking a shower together, so he sat on the covered toilet seat while they talked about anything and everything. Afterwards, he dressed her in one of his favorite worn-in band shirts, propped her up on his fluffiest pillows, and ran down the street to grab them burgers from his favorite diner. 

It was barely two days before Harry stopped into the record store during her shift, asking if he could come over after she was done.

They hadn't gone on any dates yet, but in complete fairness, it was hard to do. Harry worked every day and Daisy often worked closing shifts, which meant she wasn't finished until midnight. On those days, Harry would meet her outside and walk her home. And on the rare occasion when neither of them were working or busy, they were cooped up and tangled between bedsheets, wanting nothing more than to lick into each other's mouths. 

Daisy likes Harry. A lot. And she knows that he had admitted to having feelings for her too — it's what caused the whole thing to start, after all — but he hasn't made a move to shift things to relationship territory, and she's too scared to do it. What if he changed his mind? What if he wanted to keep things casual and physical? What if... what if he didn't want to date a virgin?

As she steps into Sam's Records, she sighs and shakes her head, willing the negative thoughts to physically leave her brain. She shoots a small smile at Warren, her coworker who's high out of his mind most times than not. Daisy swears that he emits a permanent scent of weed, seeping from his pores regardless of whether or not he's smoked.

"What's happenin', Daisy?" Warren greets as she slides onto the barstool behind the cash register. 

"Not much. How's the shop been so far?" 

Warren shrugs his shoulders as he continues shuffling through the shipment box of new records, "Pretty decent, couple of college chicks came in for the new Bee Gees joint. A kid was asking when we're getting the new Styx record, so I'm gonna ask Sam about it later." 

Daisy nods and begins to straighten up the front of the store. Warren isn't nearly as organized as she was, but she finds comfort in the routine of piling Rolling Stone magazines, emptying ash trays, and changing out the music. She was putting on Rumours for the billionth time when Warren whistled out, "Dais, lover boy alert!" 

She knows before she turns around that Harry's walking into the store. Warren started referring to him as "lover boy" after he saw Harry leaning over the front counter to press a kiss to Daisy's cheek a few weeks back.

Daisy smiles to herself when she sees him, long legs clad in swishy burnt orange bell bottoms and a ringer tee stretched over his chest. A cigarette hangs from his lips but he's quick to remove it when he focuses in on Daisy, a bright grin on his face. 

"Hey, pretty lady," he greets as he stubs out his cigarette in one of the ash trays. 

"Hey yourself. Didn't I just see you?" She giggles and Harry shrugs his shoulders, his smile shifting to a guilty smirk. 

"Yeah, but my sister was there. Wanted to get some time with you without her." 

"H..." Daisy sighs, her eyes darting to the front door when the bell jingles, signaling the entrance of new customers. "This whole act is getting old."

"'S not my fault she's miserable no one wants to jive with her."

She sighs and shakes her head. "You have to let it go. In her defense, I was her friend first. Us being... a thing has to be kinda weird for her, don't you think? It's alright for her to bug out a little."

Harry shrugs his shoulders as he lifts his hand to run it through his hair. Daisy had convinced him to let it grow out just a tad bit longer, the ends now meeting the bottoms of his earlobes. 

"Whatever, Dais," he mumbles, "You psyched for the joint tonight? It's been a minute since we've hosted." 

"It has been, hm?" Daisy agrees, "It'll be groovy as long as you let me play some ABBA." 

Harry grins cheekily and lets out a laugh. "Only for my disco queen." 

She tries not to blush as he leans over the register to press a quick kiss to her mouth, but not before his lips linger alongside her ear. "Did I mention how totally foxy you look today? My pretty bunny in those tiny denim shorts." 

"Harry," she murmurs in fake shock, though the giant smile plastered across her face gives her away. "Go home, you'll get me when I'm done with my shift here, okay?"

"Far out, Dais," Harry says with a grin, stepping away from the counter, "Make sure you walk over with Warren, capiche? You know I don't like you leaving work alone at night."

"10-4, captain."

He chuckles and nods a goodbye to Warren on his way out, a pep in his step as he thinks about spending the night with his sweet little disco girl. Daisy has the same love struck smile on her face. 

. . . Sam's Records closes at 11 pm. After that, Daisy has to lock the doors, count the day's earnings, put it in the safe, sweep, and clean up the shop so tomorrow's opening employee — a sweet girl named Penny, who spent the last year following Led Zeppelin on tour — could start the day with ease.

It's helpful to have Warren there, who's quicker at dealing with the cash, and they're able to make it out of the store by 11:45. Daisy's nearly bouncing on the balls of her feet as Warren locks up, feeling as if her heart has strings that are tugging her in the direction of Harry. 

"God, you two are really obsessed with each other, huh?" 

Daisy sucks her teeth at Warren's comment, though she knows it's all in good fun. He lights a cigarette as they begin the short distance to Harry and Willow's place. 

"How did Will take the news that you're banging her brother?"

There it is again — the assumption that her and Harry are just sleeping together. Sure, they do stuff together, but it seems like all anyone thinks is that they're with one another for physical intimacy. And even if that were the case, why hasn't Harry made a move to take her virginity yet?

She swallows roughly at an attempt to push down her insecurities, instead focusing on the cracks in the sidewalk and the thin smoke coming from Warren's cigarette. 

"She's warming up to it,"  Daisy replies, worrying her bottom lip between her teeth. "I think it's been an adjustment, but I can understand why."

"For sure. Willow's always been protective of H, it makes sense that she's not totally digging it."

"It's me, though," she protests, "She knows I won't do anything to hurt him."

Warren shrugs. "Yeah, maybe. But they've always been attached at the hip. Like, when we were in fifth grade, Willow cried almost every day at school and the only person that could calm her down was Harry. They'd call him at the high school and he'd come all the way down every time and the second she saw him, she stopped. They have a special bond, that's all."

Daisy's an only child, so it's hard for her to grasp such a tight knit relationship, but she gets it — she's been living in San Diego alongside the Styles siblings for years now, and she's seen that trust and love firsthand. She doesn't fight Warren on it, instead letting silence take over as they approach the familiar apartment, where Thin Lizzy's "The Boys Are Back in Town" is playing from the interior. 

"Looks like Harry still has dibs on the tunes," Warren smirks, stomping out his dead cigarette.

There are a few familiar faces out on the deck, all of who are currently taking smoke breaks. Daisy flashes them a friendly smile and Warren stays behind, likely to make a dent in the stash of drugs he brought in his bag. Nevertheless, she trucks on through the thick smoke enveloping the apartment — as usual, Willow and Harry never keep things casual when they host a party.

The place is flooded with people and it seems like there's drugs and booze everywhere: Girls are dancing in the living room over people snorting lines off the coffee table and the town's Dead Heads are perched on the couch, pupils as large as dinner plates. She doesn't care much for the atmosphere, though she does recognize Mitch, one of Harry's co-workers, in the corner with his girlfriend Sarah, each with cans of Bud Light in their hands. 

Daisy is about to make her way over to them when Harry suddenly appears, a large grin plastered across his face when he zeroes in on her. 

"Dais!" he exclaims, ambling forward to wrap his arms around her form. She giggles at his wide smile, her insides melting at his excitement to see her. "You made it."

"Of course I did, silly," Daisy laughs, pulling back slightly. He keeps an arm around her waist so their chests are flush against one another, and she notices the glazed over twinkle in his eyes; a true Harry identifier that he'd been hitting the bong in her absence. "Got this shindig started without me, did you?"

"Please, you know my night's never complete without my sunshine girl." 

She grins so hard her cheeks ache and he leans forward to press a quick kiss to her nose. "Interested in a little grass, lady love?"

"Sure," Daisy nods, "Where's your sis, though? Wanna make sure I say hey before we spark up."

Harry shrugs his shoulders as his grasp on Daisy's form relaxes. "Dunno. Haven't seen her in a bit."

She sighs and nods, forcing a small smile onto her lips. "Head on over to your fire escape and I'll meet you there in a tick, 'kay? I just wanna find Willow."

She can tell that he's not thrilled by this, but maybe it's the weed, or even her attempt at scolding him from earlier. Whatever it is, he nods, compliant in her ask, and gives her hand a small squeeze before scampering off in the direction of his locked bedroom.

Daisy heads for the kitchen first to grab a beer, knowing she'll need a little bit of liquid courage to meander through the crowded party looking for her best friend. There's a couple making out; one cornering the other, who sits atop the kitchen counter, and Daisy makes a mental note to tell Harry to wipe it down tomorrow once they're done nursing their hangovers. 

With a can of Miller in hand, she scopes the small apartment. Normally, Willow and Daisy are side-by-side at these things, splitting joints and schmoozing with strangers. Willow is naturally more extroverted than her; she's always suggesting they play Spin The Bottle or 7 Minutes in Heaven with their newfound friends while Daisy finds a nervous excuse to refuse. She's grateful that she has Harry now and doesn't have to sit there, watching Willow be more courageous than her.

Even on Daisy's tippy toes, the brunette is nowhere to be found. She rolls her lips into her mouth as she decides to check the bathroom, but all she finds is a line of girls actually trying to use it. She meanders to Willow's bedroom, which is always locked during parties, but gives it a try anyway. She gently raps her knuckles against the wood, pressing an ear to it. 

"Will? You in there?"

She doesn't think she hears any movement so she tries again, but she can't be sure with David Bowie's loud voice crooning through the apartment. She goes to knock a third time, but the door is ripped open before her hand makes contact. 

"What?" Willow hisses out before she realizes it's Daisy. Her eyes widen and she quickly closes the door a smidge, blocking Daisy from looking inside. 

"I was looking for you," Daisy says slowly, her eyebrows furrowed in confusion, "I just got here and you weren't out there..."

"Um, yeah. Migraine. Sorry." 

Willow's being weird, and not just in the weird "I-don't-like-you-being-with-my-brother" way she's been lately. The best friends never have secrets or hide things from each other, but something about this feels like uncharted territory. 

"Are you alright?" Daisy asks softly as she reaches out to gently touch her elbow, "Do you need water, or company?"

"I'm fine," Willow quips, "I'm just not into all this tonight. I'll see you tomorrow, yeah?"

Daisy doesn't get a chance to ask another question before Willow narrowly slides behind the door, shutting and locking it in a flash. Her heart tugs at the girl. Her gut says that something is off, but Willow's never lied to her before, and she doesn't even want to think that's a possibility. She chooses to believe her and instead makes the short trek to Harry's room, doing their secret knock — three slow raps followed by two quick ones — to let him know that she's here. 

Over the past few weeks, Harry's room has become a safe space for her, and she physically feels her worries melt away when he opens the door and pulls her inside. She giggles when he presses her up against the now-locked door, placing his hands on either side of her head to cage her in. 

"I haven't had you to myself all day, sunshine." He mutters, leaning forward to gently nip at the skin below her jaw. 

"You're insatiable." Daisy mumbles, leaning up to wrap her arms around his neck. She plays at the loose curls gathering there, soft and silky from the shower he took this afternoon while she laid in his bed, reading a Judy Blume book. 

"'m not. Just obsessed with you." 

Her stomach flutters as their lips make contact. The kiss feels like home — soft and sweet as their mouths meld together, quickly picking up pace as eager tongues dance for dominance. Harry always wins, despite a solid fight put up on Daisy's end. 

She puts her hand to his chest and stops them before they get too carried away, though half of her mind drifts off to the orgasm he gave her last night; two of his fingers steadily pumping into her and stroking at the sensitive spot inside, his dirty mouth whispering promises of pleasure into her ear. 

"Willow was locked away in her room. She was acting kinda weird... did you guys have a fight before this?"

Harry's lips are spit-swollen and the color of a muted cherry red as he shakes his head. "No, she was pretty jazzed about tonight. We split half a bottle of wine and watched the news together." 

"Oh," Daisy says softly, insecurity quickly creeping into her brain. 

"I'm sure it had nothing to do with you, bunny. She might've not been feelin' well or something, don't get it twisted in that pretty head."

She nods, convincing herself to believe him. He knew her better than anyone else, and Willow did say she had a migraine. She breathes deeply and allows herself to fall into Harry's embrace, the familiar scent of his cologne, woody and sweet, instantly soothing her. 

"C'mon, let's go sit out on the fire escape."

Harry tugs at her hand and she follows him, pliant in his suggestion. They climb out the window and onto the grated structure. It's early September but the San Diego air is still thick with humidity, coating Daisy's exposed legs and arms. She slightly regrets picking out a suede mini skirt this morning, but when she grabbed it, she remembered that it was one of Harry's favorites on her. 

It's quiet between them as Harry digs in his pocket for a joint and his lighter. The party sounds miles away now, and Daisy leans her elbows on the steel banister, taking in the inky night sky. Out here, it really did just feel like her and Harry were the only ones who matter. 

Harry sparks up and takes a deep drag before passing it to Daisy. She readily accepts it and sticks it between her lips, inhaling with fluttered eyes. She can feel Harry watching her but all she cares about is getting to the relaxed, floaty state he was already in. 

"You're so pretty."

"You're so high." She smiles lazily and opens her eyes, handing it back to Harry. 

"Maybe, yeah," he smirks, "But I think you're a stunner regardless of how stoned I am."

Daisy shakes her head and he steps closer to her form, placing a hand on her hip. "Lemme smoke you up, sunshine," he mumbles, and she nods. They do this every time — the first time they smoked together, he found out mellow weed highs made her even more sensitive to his touch, and now, he couldn't help putting his hands all over her.

Harry takes a deep inhale of the joint, holds it, and pulls Daisy closer. Their chests are flush against one other as he fits himself between her parted legs, a hand on her hip to keep her in place. She parts her lips just enough for the smoke to form a steady stream from his mouth to hers as he exhales, sealing it with a firm kiss.

As soon as they meet, everything in her body is screaming for him. She needs to touch him, she needs to feel him, she needs to be connected to him. 

Quickly, slow kisses intertwine with undertones of want, and it's apparent that Daisy is just as needy as ever, even with mutual orgasms provided on a near-daily basis. Harry wants to tease her for it, but he's a little too far gone now, too; seeing her in the late summer night, sticky skin, a mini skirt, and a poor excuse for a lace top covering her upper body. The warm lust between them is palpable as his tongue pokes around the inside of her mouth, nipping at her bottom lip and squeezing her side with a familiar desperation. She's panting, struggling to keep up, but trying her absolute hardest not to get left in the dust. 

"Can I make you feel good, bunny?" Harry breathes into her mouth, trailing his fingertips along her midriff and dancing along the waistband of her skirt. She's ready to nod and provide consent until the big storm cloud of insecurity suddenly overtakes her thoughts, self-deprecating insults about her virginity status becoming the only thing she can focus on. 

"Dais?" Harry backs away just slightly, enough to take in her facial expression. "We don't have to do anything if you don't want to—"

Daisy refuses to have another bad thought as she cuts him off and mashes their lips together, messy and wet. Her trembling hands find the bottom of his tee shirt; a woman on a defined mission as she pulls the fabric upwards, her palms pressed against his stomach. She goes to peel the shirt off him when he breaks their kiss again, much to her dismay. 

"Hey, what gives?" Harry asks softly, leaning down a bit so they're eye level, "Not that I don't love this, but you're moving mighty quick here, sunshine girl."

She resists the urge to huff in frustration, instead letting his shirt fall back down to his hips. "I just... want you, H. You dig?"

Harry chuckles, his eyes crinkling at her attempt at casual sex talk. "Yeah, I dig, but I thought we established that ages ago." 

"Well, I wanna like... you know, pop my cherry tonight." 

His eyes widen and his hands drop from Daisy's form. He's never heard her refer to her virginity in such a crass way, even if it's the slang everyone uses. Besides the fact, he's shocked she suddenly wants to lose it at a party with nearly 30 people on the other side of the door. 

"Dais," Harry's eyebrows are furrowed in confusion, "You deserve more than just 'popping your cherry.' Are you spaced out or something?"

She shakes her head quickly, determined to get what she wants. 

"No. I wanna lose it tonight, I'm tired of being a virgin and you haven't made any moves to take it so if you don't want to, it's groovy—"

"What on earth are you on about?" Harry questions, "Why wouldn't I wanna sleep with you? I thought— well maybe I was misinterpreting things but I thought we were, like, going steady, I know I haven't asked or anything but I was preparing to. Honest."

Daisy's face warms at Harry's admittance. She blinks her eyes a few times as she processes his words, her bottom lip dropping open. "I'm... I just thought you've been with so many people, maybe you didn't want the responsibility of being with someone who... hasn't, y'know?"

Harry sighs and nods his head understandingly. Stubbing the joint out on the cool banister of the fire escape, he reaches forward to envelop her form in a tight hug. Suddenly, her senses are invaded by Harry, and she basks in the feel of his arms around her and his comforting scent. 

"I'm sorry I wasn't more upfront about what I wanted," Harry mumbles into her hair, "But I do want you to be my girl. As for the whole virginity thing... I never wanted to pressure you. You never seemed like you were in a rush to lose it, and I wanted us to build up to it, I guess. Make sure you were comfortable before we did it. But you'd be totally out of your mind to think I had no interest in doing that with you, baby."

"I wanna be your girl," Daisy murmurs before pressing a light kiss to his collarbone. "And I want you to be my first. I've never felt more comfortable with another person before." 

"Yeah?" Harry asks with a teasing smirk, ducking down to look at her, "You're my girl, then. I will be your first, but not tonight. You deserve so much more than a rendezvous at a party, silly girl."

"Shush," Daisy says, growing bashful at his words. "Soon, though?"

Harry chuckles and nods. "Yeah, sunshine. Soon."

. . .

Harry and Daisy spend the rest of the night in his bedroom, high off the joint they smoked and their newly established relationship. 

Even when Harry's tuckered out, fast asleep next to her in bed while the party simmers outside, leaving only the too-drunk and quiet trippers behind, Daisy can't believe it. She keeps replaying the conversation in her brain, amazed that he somehow likes her enough to be her boyfriend. She feels so special. 

And while his soft snores offer a comfortable rhythmic sound, it's not enough for Daisy to ignore her parched throat. Carefully, she untangles herself from the sheets and tiptoes out the door, shutting it quietly behind her. She's prepared to make a quick trek to the kitchen when she sees Willow emerge from her own bedroom, followed by a blonde girl Daisy faintly recognizes from the neighborhood. She goes to say hi, relieved that Willow may be feeling a little better, but the words get stuck in her throat when the blonde grasps at Willow's hand, spinning her to press a kiss to her lips. 

Willow doesn't notice Daisy standing there with wide eyes. She doesn't know what this implies, if Willow's gay or straight or whatever, and she doesn't care. She knows not everyone is understanding and welcoming in that way, and it pains her to think that her best friend would hide such a big secret from her, or receive hatred for the person she likes. She's seen her fair share of same sex hookups at the disco, where men or women try to be together in secret, and she's never thought too much about it. Not until right now, when she sees her smacking lips with another girl right in front of her. 

Daisy doesn't know what to say, so she doesn't say anything. Instead, she quickly turns on her heel and goes back to Harry's room, locking it quietly. With a spinning head, she doesn't even notice that he's awake and watching her, his eyes puffy with sleep. 

"Y'alright?"

She nearly jumps at the sound of the voice but forces a tight smile on her lips. She doesn't want to — no, she's refusing — to reveal this information to Harry. It's not her secret to tell, if there's anything even to it.

"Yeah. I needed a drink, I didn't know you were up."

Harry hums and stretches his arms out, propping himself up against the mess of pillows behind him. "Come back to bed?"

Her heart flutters at his request, adoring the way the words sound leaving his mouth. Without a second thought, she's climbing back into the cotton wonderland of sheets and pillows, breathing in his scent as he wraps his arms around her body, pulling her closer. 

Tangling their legs together, Daisy presses her head to his chest. She places a hand to his stomach and feels his slow breathing. They're quiet for a little bit and she assumes he's fallen back asleep until she feels his length hardening beneath her thigh. She swallows, biting her lip as she contemplates mentioning it. 

"Sorry," Harry eventually mumbles out, pressing a kiss to her hair, "Just ignore it, it'll go away on its own."

"We're not even doing anything." Daisy teases, lifting her head to press her chin into his chest. He places his hand at the back of her head and smiles. 

"You're in my shirt and a tiny little pair of panties, cuddling me, looking adorable as shit. You get me going regardless of whether or not we're doing anything."

"You like when I wear your clothes?" she presses, sitting up slightly to balance on her knees. Slowly, she splits her thighs to straddle his waist, fitting her core on his stomach.

"Of course," Harry mutters, tugging at his own hair, "You look smokin' in anything, but something about you wearing my shirts..." his fingers dance over the skin of her thigh, lifting up the worn fabric of his Peter Gabriel tee. He zeroes in on the pale pink underwear covering her modesty and he breathes out, feeling his briefs constrict his plumping cock even more. 

"And what about these?" she asks, dipping her fingers underneath the elastic waistband of her underwear. "Do you prefer me wearing them? Or do you like when you can see everything?"

"Depends. Think this little pussy is gorgeous regardless... but I especially love when you get so worked up for me that you're dripping in your panties, getting them all sticky with the sweetest little wet spot," he mumbles, thumbing over her clit through the material. "Looks so incredible, I just wanna bury my tongue in you until you can't take it anymore."

"Oh," Daisy breathes out, bucking her hips in a failed attempt for more friction between her legs. Harry smirks as her eyes begin to close. He pauses his movements and lifts his thumb to his mouth, coating it in spit before returning to his original movements, forming light circles through her underwear. 

"I bet you'd like that, hm?" He pushes, applying more pressure to the bundle of nerves, "You'd have to push me away. Can never get enough of the way you taste, especially when you start squirting... it's the hottest thing I've ever seen, bunny."

"More," Daisy whimpers, taking a shaky hand down to her lower half. She moves the strip of fabric covering her pussy to the side, revealing her plump, glistening lips. She parts them carefully, forming a V with her fingers, her pearly clit begging for attention. 

"Take 'em off," Harry instructs, breathing shallowly as he takes in the appearance of her pussy. When they first started being physical together, she was embarrassed by her pubic hair, explaining that she knew fully grown bushes were "in" but she wasn't sure what she liked. She was nervous about it and wanted to please Harry, who simply encouraged her to experiment with different styles and find whatever made her feel the best. It was 1976 after all, and he was exhausted by anti-feminist rhetoric that would ever make his girl feel bad. 

Lately, Daisy settled for a trimmed bush above her lips. It looked manicured and neat, and she discovered both her and Harry loved having enough hair there for him to tug on when he was going down on her. He hadn't yet told her that he was also obsessed with the way her juices stuck around, making her even wetter. 

Once Daisy strips her modesty of her underwear, anything's fair game. Harry uses one of hands to firmly grab her ass as he situates her over his brief-covered cock, making her stomach twist with nerves. 

"Not gonna put it in, sunshine," he mumbles, his length twitching at the sight of her pussy spread open over his underwear, "Just wanna grind with you a little, alright? Make us both feel really good."

Daisy nods eagerly, rolling her hips against his. She whimpers at the sensation that offers a semblance of the friction she'd been desperately searching for. He pulls his cock out of his briefs and pushes it between her lips, making them both groan out.

"There you go," Harry encourages as he gently bucks upwards to meet her motions, shifting his cock against her clit, "Show me you deserve to cum on my cock. Show me how much you want me to fuck this tight little pussy."

Daisy lets her head lull to the side, her eyes squeezed shut at his dirty words. They always get her impossibly close to coming, feeling as if the pleasure-filled feelings are finally going to bubble over and spill. 

They're moving in sync with one another, her hands flat on his chest, moaning at their closeness. It feels so good, and she wants to tell him to slip his cock in, to fill her up and fuck her until she can't remember her own name, but she knows he won't; instead uttering something about it not being the right moment. 

"Shit, I'm close," Daisy mumbles out through swollen lips. Her right hand is moving to her pussy to rub her clit in small circles and Harry's jaw falls slack as he watches her. He gives her hip a squeeze and folds his legs at the knee, pushing her down to her tummy so their chest to chest. 

"Know my dirty girl needs a bit more to cum, hm?" The question is rhetorical but she nods helplessly anyway, shuttering beneath his grasp. He trails daft fingers to her backside and grabs one of her ass cheeks so her tighter hole is exposed. She groans into his skin but he removes his hand, giving her butt a firm slap. 

"Shush, sweetness." Harry instructs, pressing a kiss to her forehead. Before Daisy has a chance to whine, he's back to circling the tight rim of muscles, reaching downward to collect some of her dripping arousal from her inner thighs. Daisy can barely focus on all of the different sensations, and once he presses the tip of his thumb into her ass, she's a goner. 

"Fuck, Harry—" she moans as her holes pulsate, her asshole squeezing Harry's finger. 

"Jesus fucking Christ," he mutters, using his other hand to grip her hip, keeping her firmly in place. Seeing and listening to Daisy cum is enough to get him there — his own personal wet dream, he swears — and it's only a few moments after her orgasm has passed that he's spitting out a heavy load from his cock, covering their bellies with his warm cum. 

Simultaneously, their bodies come to a stop, and the only sound is their choppy breathing. Gently, he pulls his finger out of her, giving her thigh a small squeeze. He feels that she's slowly starting to go lax, and he wants to clean her up before they go back to sleep. 

"Up, sunshine," Harry mumbles against the shell of her ear, "Need to get you clean."

Daisy nods, slowly rising from his chest. She glances down to see the mess they've made and bites her lip, feeling the familiar stirring in her core again. 

"And you call me insatiable," Harry snickers, making her roll her eyes. She climbs off of him with sore thighs and he gets up, grabbing a dirty tee shirt to clean them up. 

She's quiet and missing the usual glow she has post-orgasm, making his stomach twist slightly. "Everything alright?" He asks, moving the soft fabric between her legs to wipe up her arousal. 

Daisy hums, though it's not much of an answer. The second they reached their peaks, images of Willow kissing that girl re-entered her brain. She feels shitty for using Harry as a distraction from what was bothering her to begin with. 

"Was... were you comfortable with all that?" Harry presses, and it's only then that it dawns on her that he thinks he's the problem. With wide eyes she nods her head, grabbing her — his — tee-shirt from earlier, sliding it over her body. 

"It was amazing, H," Daisy answers, crawling on her knees to reach where he's standing over the bed. She shuffles forward and presses a kiss to his lips, wishing that she could tell him what she saw. "Let's get some more rest. Please?"

And Harry can hardly deny her, especially when she looks so tired and fucked out. He pulls on a clean pair of briefs and climbs back into the bed, taking his position as the big spoon. His body wraps effortlessly around hers, like two puzzle pieces begging to be clicked together. 

"Night, Dais." He mumbles, pecking her shoulder. 

"G'night, Harry."

Part three | Series masterlist

[hyuckswoman]

“hi y/n” you hear your friend jaemin say

“hi guys” you answer, you were going to greet them individually but there were 5 people in front of you,, you’re too lazy

“I’m jeno, i don’t think we’ve met yet, though it feels like it” he introduces himself

“i’m y/n, what do you mean by that?” you ask confused,, it’s amazing how men have terrible communication skills

“jaemin talks a lot about you, or more like brags about being your friend, then jisung started talking about finally having a friend that was cool, haechan talks about you here and there and then mark cause of the whole..you know.. situation?” jeno says hesitating at the last part of his sentence

you burst out laughing, you swear the whole mark situation has to be a collective traumatic experience for everybody

“dude cmon, can we like stop bringing that up?” mark says you can feel the awkwardness radiating from him

“hey i’m ready thanks for waiting” your friend renjun who you had been waiting for finally arrived

upon seeing the mass amount (5) of people he decided to introduce himself

“hey i’m renjun nice to meet some of you” he decides to say remembering his twitter quarrel with who he described to you as his ‘arch nemesis’ haechan

“you’re still mad about that?? dude grow up quite literally too you’re small” haechan retorts after hearing renjun’s remark

“i’m baffled at how much audacity you have to insult me when we’re not friends” renjun says. here’s a thing about your friend renjun, the man was never not only going to back down from a fight but also lose it

“i literally made an innocent funny comment and you’re still pissed, no wonder i’m y/n’s favorite” donghyuck answers as renjun laughs

“y/n who’s your favorite?” renjun asks, you debated if you should tease him by answering donghyuck or give him the satisfaction that he needed by answering his name

“you duh” you answer, you knew renjun was not 100% confident and knowing your friend, a little validation here and there is very much appreciated

you do start to feel bad when everybody else starts to laugh while haechan whines about the world hating him or something?

“to be fair though, we don’t know each other that much and even if we’ve just met i really like you and i could totally see us being friends in the future” you answer truthfully, you’re not completely heartless you’ll let haechan go with a small win

you don’t even have the time to hear his answer as you can feel yourself being dragged by renjun to the place ningning was patiently waiting for you.

13. friend groups interacting

previous chapter masterlist next chapter

notes: I wasn't planning on releasing a chapter tonight (on a monday too..) but when i logged onto tumblr and saw everybody going like: I won't be active!! i thought whomever bothers to read my story deserved a new chapter

Like always, reaction n feedback (even requests for other posts) are well appreciated here ><

taglist (open): @imsiriuslyreal @iscocohere @simpforarmihn @replayenthusiast @lovm4rk @youreintheclubb

[creedslove]

HEARTLESS 💔 - PART SEVEN

Agent Whiskey (Jack Daniels x f!reader)

Summary: You and Jack have a real conversation for the first time and you find out he's more vulnerable than you thought

(This is the seventh chapter of the HEARTLESS 💔 series)

• PART ONE | PART TWO | PART THREE | PART FOUR | PART FIVE | PART SIX

Warnings: hurt, angst, hurt, angst, talk of past trauma, asshole!jack (but not really), mom!reader, and fluff because Wyatt is too cute

A/N: besties, I gotta confess 🥺 that I teared up writing this one, I don't know how you will all react, but my heart is broken for jack and reader 🥺

3.2k words

It was only evening when Wyatt finally showed signs of being tired. He loved Silver Pony so much and no matter if Jack showed him the other horses, he was hooked to your favorite girl, always clinging to her and stroking her soft fur. Silver Pony also enjoyed the affection, always hovering around the two of you gently, making your son giggle and reward both you and Jack with his sweet laughs. 

The cowboy didn't interfere, he just watched the two of you having fun, his mind wandering through his thoughts. For once, he didn't think of his late wife and their unborn son, instead, he kept thinking of you and Wyatt, wondering and picturing what life would be like if he hadn't made you go away, if he'd taken care of you while you were pregnant, he was sure you were glowing and looking gorgeous, he thought of what would it be like holding you at night, stroking your pregnant bump and talking to the baby in your womb. How he would shower you in presents and you two would get the baby's room ready together. He liked imagining taking care of Wyatt as a newborn, how he would probably be afraid of holding him and you would soothe him. You two would be so happy with your beautiful little family. He thought of all the celebrations and parties that could have happened on his ranch, your engagement dinner, your wedding party, Wyatt's first birthday and so on. It shattered his heart to think he had missed out on an entire life of happiness only because he was a bad person. 

He watched as the sun was setting and got up, gathering the basket and walking towards Silver Pony "I think we should head back, the sun is going down and Helen made us dinner…" he swallowed "it's your favorite sugar" he looked at you with his puppy eyes and you controlled the urge of rolling your own. It baffled you his ability of being a real dick and pretending nothing was happening, you were going to ignore what he said, but Wyatt smiled big "mommy happy?" He asked and you nodded, turning to Silver Pony "I'm very happy because I have you, my beautiful son, and also our gorgeous Silver Pony" she caressed down the mare's face and Wyatt whimpered as he couldn't reach it, so Jack quickly joined them, lifting him up and he imitated his mommy's gesture 

"I wove Silvew Pony… can we take hew home, mommy?" He tilted his head in such innocent way your chest tightened and you laughed softly at him "we can't fit her in our apartment baby, otherwise I'd love to take her with us, so for now she has to stay here" 

Wyatt pouted and nodded and then his face lit up as he had an amazing idea "can we wive hewe? With cowboy, mommy, Wyatt and Silvew Pony" he said happily and clapped his hands excitedly. Jack swallowed sadly and looked at you, you glanced back at him and licked your lips. As much as you wanted to punch him, you couldn't help but feel your lips tingling every time you remembered the kiss he forcefully imposed on you. 

"I would love for you and your mommy to live with me, big guy, but I think mommy likes the city, but you two are always welcome here, to spend the weekend or as long as you would like" he said and rubbed Wyatt's arm, seeing his skin was cold and they should probably get back inside. 

"Y/N… Wyatt is a little cold…" he said as he gently placed his big hand on your arm, startling you as you didn't expect his warm touch. "You're cold too. Here…" he told you, carefully handing you Wyatt as he took off his leather jacket and wrapped it around your body. 

You didn't say much as Wyatt snuggled you, clinging to your body and yawning as your warmth spread through his body. You also tried not paying attention to Jack's scent lingering all over it. It smelled like pine, a little bit of cologne, whiskey and him. It used to be your favorite smell in the whole world, but now it only left shattered pieces of your heart behind. You nuzzled Wyatt's curls and kissed his forehead, making him giggle as you two rushed inside as Jack stayed behind to take Silver Pony back into the stable. 

Helen greeted you at the door, you knew Saturdays evenings she went back to her home and would only come back on Monday, she was ready to go, but not without showering Wyatt and kisses and hugging you tight, telling you once again how happy she was to see you and how she wished you would come more often to visit them, you nodded and said goodbye, feeling happy to have seen the woman and placed Wyatt down. You took off Jack's jacket just in time to see him walk through the door and handed it back to him "thank you" you said in a low voice and turned to your son "now you're gonna get a nice warm shower, okay? So we can have yummy dinner" she told him, but he pouted and hugged his dad's legs, who knelt in front of him and stroked his cheek "mommy is right, buddy, you gotta do what she says, it's time for shower because no one likes a smelly cowboy" he winked and tickled his tummy making his son laugh. 

You nodded, surprised at Jack's reinforcement as you expected low of him after he displayed his true character towards you so many times. You just assumed he would always take the easy road in order to be Wyatt's favorite, but it was good he knew you should work as a team and not as rivals. 

You took Wyatt back to the guest bedroom you'd be having through the night as you would help him shower in the bathroom. He was excited to put on his horses PJs after showering, so he could show his cowboy friend how much of a cowboy himself he was. You chuckled, finding it amusing while Wyatt already got undressed by himself and got under the shower wanting to be over with it as soon as possible; though you tried starting it, no stream of water came out and you sighed, as you had no idea how to fix it, you wrapped a towel around your son and went to the stairs, calling Jack so he could assist you. He ran up the stairs as quickly as possible, excitement rushed through his veins as you were addressing him "what's wrong?" He licked his bottom lip and watched you intently

"Shower's not working" you informed him and he nodded and followed you into the bathroom. Wyatt giggled as he saw the cowboy, he shyly hid under his mommy still in his towel, waiting patiently while Jack took a look at things. 

"Seems like this cowboy will have to shower somewhere else and you too sugar. You can take the bathroom in my bedroom, you know where it is and you can use the tub as well" he said with an excited smile at Wyatt "how's that buddy? Would you like to be a water cowboy tonight?" He cooed at Wyatt who nodded excitedly "pwease mommy, i want to pway watew cowboy" he pouted and you agreed, heading towards Jack's bedroom - the one that used to be yours too. 

"I'll warm up dinner while you bathe him, sugar, unless you want my help…" he offered but you quickly dismissed. 

After Wyatt had a blast in Jack's tub and begged you to brush your hair to the side just like the cowboy's, the three of you had dinner together. Helen had been so kind to make your favorite dish, along with some nuggets for your son, who enjoyed every second of it completely oblivious to the tension between you and his daddy. 

Wyatt didn't take long to fall asleep on the couch after the amount of fun and activities he had during the week. He was so happy and enjoyed every single minute of the day and, though Jack sighed a little disappointed as he saw him already fast asleep

"I wanted to show him the bedroom I set up for him… Y/N please, I want Wyatt to keep coming here, you too, of course, so you can visit Helen and Silver Pony, but I know you hate my guts so I won't force you to come any longer, but I want my son around" he said as he sat on the edge of the couch and caressed his hair gently. 

"Why did you come back after so long? I don't understand… I know you've been providing us with money here and there and that you also watched us from afar, but why now?" 

You saw how tense Jack got as he looked down and took a deep breath, ready to speak but then changed his mind as Wyatt whimpered in his dream "this ain't something we should talk about in front of a kid, Y/N… go relax, take your shower and I'll tell you later" he said firmly and very gently picked up Wyatt, asking you to follow him down the hallway where he stood next to a door, which you remembered really well it was another guest bedroom, but apparently Jack had made it into Wyatt's room. He waited for you to open the door as his own hands were busy with your son and your heart warmed at how beautifully he had it made. 

It was of course, all farm themed, with paintings on the wall, all kinds of animal plushies and matching furniture. You knew your son would go crazy once he saw it and you couldn't help tearing up at how thoughtful that place was. Even if things were ruined between you and Jack, maybe he could be a good father after all. 

He covered Wyatt gently and pecked his forehead, turning to you and giving you another sad smile "you should go shower now, we can talk in a little while" 

                           •••

Jack waited for you to exit the bathroom in his master room with a glass of scotch in hands and sitting down in the armchair. He felt anxious at the same time he wanted to get things done with you as soon as possible. He knew you deserved the truth, as well as his apologies though he was sure you wouldn't actually accept them, still he had to try. He wanted his son around and he could only get it if you could stand him at least a little, because even if he had blackmailed you, he didn't want to bring lawyers into the game, he didn't want to take things to the court and cause you and Wyatt more distress. He hoped he could make things civil between the two of you and he knew the way of getting into it was being honest with you. 

He could hear the shower running and wondered why you hadn't bathed in the tub, as you loved doing it and very often invited him to join in with you. He felt a wave of lust hitting him, as he thought of all the time you'd spent there together, how you touched each other's bodies, your lips on him, your taste in his mouth, he was so happy and wasn't even aware that would end some day. 

He was so caught up in his thoughts he barely noticed the shower went completely silent and a few minutes later, you opened the door and walked out only in your underwear, completely unaware of him at first. He gasped and felt his mouth getting dry, not expecting such a beautiful sight for his sore eyes, he licked his lips and wasn't sure if he should make his presence known, though his presence was completely explicit as he was sat there a few meters from you, under the bright lights, you were just too distracted, and he knew exactly what had caught your attention: the picture frame he had in one of his shelves. It was you and Wyatt, on his first birthday. 

You didn't know how you missed it the first time you'd been into his bedroom earlier, taking your son to be bathed, but now you saw it: it was a picture of you and him. You didn't know how Jack managed to get his hands on that picture, but it was also quite shocking as you analyzed the rest of the furniture and the wall and you didn't find any pictures of his late wife. Why did he keep your pictures and not hers? It was another Jack Daniels mystery you weren't sure you wanted to find out. 

You knew you would have to put up some clothes and find him, he managed to make you curious and you didn't know until what extent he needed to tell you something serious or if it was one of his games, but once you turned away and walked to his bed to get the clothes you'd left there, you finally spotted him in the armchair. Your heart nearly stopped at the sight of him there, you didn't expect to see Jack and he looked almost as shocked as you did, not believing you were flashing him your body like that. 

"Fuck Jack, what are you doing here?" You raised your voice at him, anger and embarrassment formed a wave inside of you, as you immediately grabbed your towel and covered yourself. 

He swallowed hard and finished his whiskey, looking embarrassed himself and rubbed the back of his neck "I didn't know you would come out of the shower without clothes, well, technically you're covering your… body" he said choosing his words carefully "but I thought you'd be fully dressed and well, you look gorgeous, even better than what I remembered, if it makes you feel any better. 

You scoffed at him and shook your head 

"Gorgeous? You said I looked rough this morning, Jack… you don't have to pity me. Besides, don't forget you're older than me and with the way you drink, you can start kissing your pretty face goodbye real soon, so you will definitely look rougher than me" you spat at him, not caring if that was pretty at all. You caught a hint of hurt in his eyes and that made you feel really proud even if it shouldn't have, but he immediately shook his head and stared at you. 

"I deserved that" he chuckled dryly "but I didn't mean that, and I also didn't mean anything bad I told you before… I am a dick I know, but I knew you hated my guts after I made you leave and I thought to myself it would be easier for me if I just pushed you away, you hate me Y/N and you got all the right to do so, and I thought it would be less painful if I forced myself to believe I hated you too, maybe if I tried hard enough, I'd stop loving you and it would be easier to handle your rejection" he said feeling ashamed and looked down. 

You sat in the other armchair, the towel covering your body as you listened to his words 

"You don't look rough at all, you're as gorgeous as you were the day you walked out of my life, Y/N, you're not a bitch, and I won't get any lawyers, I promise you" he said with a small voice "I've been hurting you so you hate me more, because I will never be worthy of your love again, I lost you, but I don't wanna lose my kid, Y/N, please" he said honestly and watched as you just had a hard expression on your face 

"You know Jack, the first time I saw you, I was already head over heels, you were on a mission and I had no idea, but I saw you approaching that woman and throwing your charm and she refused you. It was kind of funny, but all I could think of was that if it were me, it would've worked, you would have me wrapped around your finger…" you said "and only at the end of the night you saw me… and then when we started dating, I found out you'd been married before, and that's the problem with you, I'm always your second option, and I will always be" you shrugged "it hurts… to know I'm not the woman that's on your mind, that whenever we do something special to know you are thinking of how much you'd like to do with her instead… I don't want my son to grow up knowing he is only here because you couldn't have your first option… I don't want him to feel he has to compete with a ghost, because that's how I felt… that's even how I feel Jack, because do you even hear yourself? You would never do this to your wife…. You would never try to push her away by being cruel like you are, if it were her, you would get on your knees and beg for her forgiveness" you said and got up walking to his bed and getting your clothes. You didn't want to talk to him anymore, you were tired of being that hurt, as you tried leaving, he got up and held you by your wrist, firmly, making it clear you were only leaving that place when he wanted you to 

"The reason why I wanted you and my son back in my life, is because I was shot on my last mission. I tried sabotaging the mission, but the other agent got suspicious and shot me. They took me back to Statesman and Ginger fixed me right, but she still needed to trigger my memory, so she showed me a picture of my wife, God bless her soul, and nothing happened" he licked his lips and stared into your eyes "so Ginger decided to show me a picture of you and Wyatt, and that was when everything came back all at once. Us, our relationship, our life here on the ranch. I was able to relive my memories once more, and when I got back to my senses, Champ forced me into therapy, and you know what the therapist concluded?" Your jaw dropped the moment you saw Jack had tears in his eyes, you had never seen him show that kind of emotion, he was really good at controlling his feelings and he didn't show that kind of vulnerability in front of anyone. You realized he'd asked you a question and as you swallowed hard, you shook your head, answering him. 

"The therapist said I replaced one grief with another; I finally let my first wife and son rest in peace and I was grieving the loss of you and Wyatt, because I couldn't handle the guilt of making you two go away, but he reminded me you two were very much alive and I didn't want to waste any more time, I just knew I wanted my family back, and that's why I beg you for a second chance, sugar"

_____

A/N: besties, I hope you have liked this chapter and let me know your thoughts, does this cowboy deserve a second chance?

[mastomysowner]

Why Doflamingo is my favorite character

Okay, I wanna get it off my chest.

He speaks in a sarcastic tone. This 別に expresses indifference, like, “oh well, I was okay with it anyway“.

He had the means to do so, and yet he didn’t.

Indeed, Doflamingo was bent on having Dressrosa perceived by the people as a normal country, and totally not some kind of arms smuggling base. But while Arlong, like Wapol, collected tribute from his "subjects", Kaidou and Orochi used Wano's citizens as factory slaves (that’s why they didn’t starve to death in those 20 years), Doflamingo had no use for Dressrosa’s population. All they did was create problems, such as the need for curfews and toy laws and the issuing of propaganda, not to mention spending money from the arms trade on freeing them from want.

Doflamingo got off scot free after taking the Heavenly Tribute hostage, the government wouldn’t care what he does to the people of some banana monarchy. For example, Mariejois is synonymous with slavery in the OP world, and no slave owner in their right mind would allow slaves to ruin this place’s appearance. The slaves were kept where they were supposed to be, and they did what they were supposed to do. Like Kaidou said, it’s easy to get more slaves.

In his speech, Riku talked about manipulating the citizens of Dressrosa into not accidentally learning the truth, as if Doflamingo was benefiting and/or enjoying it. It's worth saying it’s technically and thematically wrong that Doflamingo is shown outside the Birdcage. He didn’t call his own technique like this for nothing.

During his reign, he looked more like he was trying to train his inner Buddha.

国民共がうるせェな. // Those citizens sure are noisy.

うるさい has both noisy and annoying among its meanings. Doflamingo used the suffix 共/domo, which is deprecating when said toward others. Even if he didn’t, his attitude towards them would still be clear; just look at his face.

He could’ve spoken to the citizens and reassured them by telling that everything was under control and announcing the arrival of CP-0, but it seems for him this idea was like bathing in manure. Just imagine something like Hancock in a country full of men.

From my standpoint, the next two scenes are strikingly similar, except it would be unthinkable for Doflamingo to cry in front of an enemy.

お前らには計り知れねえさ......!!! // For you it’s unfathomable!!!

墜ちた 天竜人に!! 人間達が何をするか!!! 想像できるか...!!? 人間は皆 残虐だ // What humans can do to a fallen Celestial Dragon!!! Can you even imagine it?! All humans are cruel.

何言ってんだ!! ...ニセミンゴ!!! // What are you talking about?! ...Fake Mingo!!!

They both don’t want to name these things.

There’s a little difference between 残虐 (zangyaku) and 残酷 (zankoku), both meaning cruelty. Zankoku emphasizes heartlessness and mercilessness, while  zangyaku is used when talking about brutal acts. 虐 in zangyaku stands for “to abuse; to torment”. That’s why sadism is 嗜虐(性) - shigyaku(sei) (嗜 is ”liking for”, 性 is “personality”).

人間にはな ...どんな人格者にも血を見て興奮する”残虐性”が眠ってる!! // In every human... Even in the best of them sleeps cruelty that gets excited at the sight of blood!!!

残虐(性) is again mentioned. Also, 人格者 isn't one acting civilized, it’s “a man of character/integrity”, one possessing a great personality.

If it was Doflamingo who wanted to see blood and death, he could’ve flushed his toilet with the tears of the Dressrosa people, but he tried to satisfy their appetites. Even the gladiators themselves were all for it.

The spectators, like Doflamingo before, wasn't just talking about slicing/attacking foes, but about 斬る - killing using a blade. In ancient Rome, it was common custom for spectators to decide whether or not to spare the losing gladiator; with these guys it wouldn't be necessary, as the result would always be the same.

Yes, of course, not all gladiators were like Spartan, who won the monthly fighting tournament 51 times and participated in who knows how many times. There were also unwilling ones, as in historical Rome.

Crazy thought: if they’re against the World Government and Sabo later freed them, could they be connected to the RA?

It's ironic that a little later in the same arc (the peak irony is that it was in Doflamingo's flashback) it was revealed just how evil with a capital E WG truly is. The idea that one can get on the literal Nazis’ good side is absurd. You can obey them all you want, and it will only affect how you wanna be sent off: with famine, with war, or with a government conspiracy involving the trade of poisonous goods?

Alright, it’s obvious that Doflamingo’s Dressrosa was meant to be similar to Franco's Spain, but I don't think it's worth comparing it to real countries and even other OP countries; it existed under very specific realities. It was more of a secret transshipment base than a country, on the brink of a world war, when the World Government was ready to trade with its enemies or, when all else fails, to unleash everything that was at its disposal.

The WG sentenced Doflamingo to death for the knowledge of their secrets, but he made himself an irreplaceable cog for them, as Iceburg had done. And for decades, he carefully implemented his plans to get his hands on the National Treasure of Mariejois and overthrow the rulers of the world.

Your honor, he’s not just a mass murderer, he’s a mass murderer with a vision. His actions when he got real power show that he had genuine good intentions for the world.

Geralt of Rivia once said: “Lesser, greater, middling, it's all the same. Proportions are negotiated, boundaries blurred. I'm not a pious hermit, I haven't done only good in my life. But if I'm to choose between one evil and another, then I prefer not to choose at all.”

And then later in the same story, Renfri tells him: “Only Evil and Greater Evil exist and beyond them, in the shadows, lurks True Evil. True Evil, Geralt, is something you can barely imagine, even if you believe nothing can still surprise you. And sometimes True Evil grabs you by the throat and says: “Choose, mate, either me, or the one that is just a little smaller!”

[veranda-larkspur]

kyaa ur so cute ^-^🎀 if youre okay with more ପ(๑•ᴗ•๑)ଓ ♡ culd i have cutesy reader giving hangover!joseph his pearl necklace and then reader says that pearl are the most precious gems bc bc bc bc they can only be found on earth and they are a proof of life that can be preserved for very long so he can keep it forever n reader thought he wuld like it ◕◡◕ 🎀 any format that you want is fine !! <3 if you dont want to write it or have other requests going on thats also fine !! i hope your day is going okay ^-^🎀🪽

I'd say that I had other asks, but then I would be lying 🥲. I think that this is such an amazing ask, so I'll try my hardest for you, you amazing anon!!! (I'm in a really good mood too, I just got a good score on my ACTs!!!)

To begin, Joseph isn't a stranger to extravagant things.

He was literally born into the French Nobility!!! He knows his way around some precious metals and gemstones.

His favorite as a child was garnet. The deep red was always a good accessory. It contrasted the blue in his eyes nicely.

He had pearls too, but never paid them any attention. He thought they were a bit plain, to be honest.

So when Joseph sat in his room, simply drinking his favorite wine and thinking, he never expected you to come in with a small box, wrapped as a gift.

You had attempted to hide the present from him, yet even in his tipsy state, he could see small glimpses of pretty ribbon from behind you.

You weren't very good at this, were you?

Joseph hobbled up, still a bit unbalanced from his latest activity. He couldn't just continue on drinking when you were right there, now could he? Certainly not.

It took him a minute though. Please help him up, he's a bit delirious...

He says he's got it, but it taking a while, it's better to just pull him up if you want to give your gift anytime soon.

After Joseph's up, you have his full attention. Especially when you announce you have a gift for him.

He's more of a "quality time" kinda guy, but you can never go wrong with presents!

When you hand over the gift, Joseph can hardly contain his excitement. He's usually more composed than this. (He's not, he's just good at hiding it when he's not drunk)

But anyway-

When Joseph (eventually) opens the present, he's a bit confused. You've given him a pearl necklace? How sweet.

But why?

And that's when you explain.

As your explaining your meaning to him, Joseph's eyes widen.

When you say to him that you've given him the necklace because of how it represents preservation and everlasting, Joseph feels like he might cry.

(He does. You don't even get a chance to comfort him before he jumps on you and smothers you in appreciation and kisses.)

Sure, Joseph isn't heartless and cold, but he is determined to preserve life. Both his own and those of his loved ones. It's what he dedicated his life to when Claude died! It's why he went to the manor in the first place!

So receiving this gift from you is something he sees as a sign of support.

He's so touched that he sobers up real quick. He's shocked. The servants feared his work, and then abandoned him when he needed them most.

But he knows that you would never.

Over the next couple of days, Joseph never drinks. And you often see him doing something, anything with his cameras. They must be perfect after all.

Though, he never neglects you. He'd never dare. In actuality, he gives you more affection and attention than you've ever been given before.

Little do you know, Joseph has procured a matching pearl ring for you. Take this information as you'd like :)

[luckyqueenreign]

Bestie I’m so tired! I played through todays release twice and it still pisses me off.

Johnny is truly a piece of shit. It’s so crazy how people who were in the villa on day one either have nothing to say or believe his blatant lies! Like, I JUST met him, why would I trust him to tell him anything?? Just plain stupid.

Kat is getting everything she deserves. If she didn’t cling to that man so hard and jump down his throat about every single thing then he wouldn’t be over there pining for me.

Gabi is still annoying to me. I’m never gonna like her. She’s clearly using Dana to stay close to Suresh. Just because I’m mad at him right now doesn’t mean she can have him.

Meera is a know nothing big mouth ass bitch. She’s constantly butting into things that have nothing to do with her and keeps on with her stupid little comments. I really wish I could just punch her in the mouth and get kicked off the show. It would 100% be worth it. I’ve never wanted to fight a game character more.

Alfie is really a little lap dog for his partner. Like, he’s just so happy to have someone that he’s turned into her bitch. That wack ass apology he gave because he couldn’t grow a pair and just say that they wouldn’t vote for me because I’ve done NOTHING to her.

Finn was the only one of the guys to really have my back when it came down to it and that really irritated me. Like, Alfie and Suresh let it be known in Casa that they both have feelings for me but you chose to keep silent while I got lied on?? Very sweet for Finn to cut Johnny’s bullshit AND back me in front of everyone and not just in a one on one. But he has stayed quiet through a lot of other unfair shit that MC has gone through and I don’t like that either.

Lulu is my favorite girl! How can she see the bs but the other girls are questioning me?? I definitely kissed her for the game both times. I’d love to see what’s gonna happen with her character.

*big dramatic sigh* Suresh…I don’t know about him at this point. All my other theories about him are out of the window. The NERVE to kiss Gabi in front of me!! And MARRY Meera like she hasn’t been coming for my head!! It’s complete nonsense. I don’t know why they’ve done this to his character but i hate it. Idk if it’s supposed to make us feel like Finn is the only one that gets us but it’s bullshit. You’re in a relationship with someone for over a year, come onto a dating show FOR them specifically, steady try to win them back and then all of a sudden crickets??? Make it make sense FB!! How can they change this man’s whole personality?! He was always an outspoken go getter and now all of a sudden he’s focusing on someone he has no spark with and kissing an old fling that was the cause of our breakup? BFFR. He was a flirt but he was never heartless. They are ruining him and I hope that Finn publicly saying that he wants me will kick his ass into gear. If not, I’m not sure how this will end. I’ll honestly have no LI and I’ll choose someone out of spite just to ruin their relationship for fucking with me.

This game is a health hazard.

bestie 😭😭😭😭i literally hate all of the bullying this SEASON not just these episodes. Theres really no need to make JoColas or Meera go same damn hard for us but they did. this is the first season with no perfect LI except maybe Lulu, she backed us from the start and she was so nice. re: Suresh...😩😩 here's my theory I really think everything he's doing is very intentional on FB's side. Even Alfie stans, I didn't realize it because I'm so focused on Suresh but look at who they chose for him to kiss, KAT...just like Suresh, Alfie has history with Kat and that kiss would've hurt MC a lot too. FB intentionally hurt us this week with Suresh and Alfie's choices to force Finn on us. Because think about it are you really going to listen to Finn's marriage proposal if you really actually wanted Suresh/Alfie and they proposed too? Nah you wouldn't.

[duhragonball]

Like Fanfiction

I just noticed I haven’t updated this blog in eleven days.  I’ve probably had longer gaps, but this just seemed kind of startling to me for some reason.  Anyway, I’m here today to talk about “Charmed.”

I finished my scheduled Fantastic Four comics for the month, so I decided to just completely waste the next weeks or so, and that led me to YouTube, where I found a series by Allison Pregler where she reviewed “Charmed” season by season. I think the whole thing ended up being ten hours long?  Anyway, I liked this because I never watched “Charmed” but it was on throughout my 20′s, and I was always aware of it, but never knew what its deal was supposed to be.  So it’s nice to finally get that settled. 

What I didn’t expect was that the main characters turned into such unlikable assholes as the series wore on.   By Season 4, Shannon Doherty left the series, and the other two leads, Alyssa Milano and Holly Marie Combs, became producers.   Pregler notes this as a turning point in the series, where their characters, Piper and Phoebe Halliwell, became more self-absorbed and were almost never called out for any character flaws.  It sounds like something out of professional wrestling, like when a top talent gets booking power and writes himself as a world champion who never loses.   Anyway, much of Pregler’s review series is taken up with unflattering montages of Phoebe and Piper being heartless jerks. When a crisis unfolds, they make it about themselves.  When innocents are in danger, they want to ignore it.   Maybe Pregler is exaggerating, but she found a lot of clips for her videos. 

Occasionally, she would compare certain plot developments to fanfiction, and not as a compliment.   I felt the same way at times, and it struck me that a lot of the storylines in “Charmed” seemed to revolve around this sort of indulgent wish-fulfillment fare.   I don’t know what went on backstage, but it really does feel like Milano and Combs wanted to do stories where their characters were beloved and respected by those around them, but also blameless and beyond reproach, no matter how snarky or dismissive they were of their magic responsibilities.   I guess that is how a lot of fanfic goes down.   Someone watches a movie and doesn’t like how their favorite character got handled, so they write their own story where their fave gets better treatment.  

That, and fanfiction often skips to the good part, whatever “good” happens to be for the writer.   If they’re doing a story about a love confession, they’ll just go straight to that, and not bother setting anything up.   When I first learned about fanfiction, I was surprised by how casually the writers would just presume that the reader knows all about the characters.  I’ve seen X-Men fics where they just call him “Scott” and never mention that he uses the codename “Cyclops” and shoots optic blasts and wears blue tights.   It’s just taken as a given, and the time you save not explaining this can be used to hurry up and get to the sex scene. 

At a guess, I think that may have been where “Charmed” lost its way.   It was supposed to be this urban fantasy thing, I think, tapping into the success of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, with three sisters getting witch powers and fighting demons.   So it makes sense for the characters to get frustrated with that, and wish that they could chuck the whole deal and lead normal lives.  You see that in every superhero story.   Spider-Man wishes he could be a normal guy again, or look the other way when shit goes down, but he knows he can’t.   It makes sense for “Charmed” to do the same thing once in a while, but I think somewhere along the way, they got a little too comfortable with that trope and fell into a rut.   When Phoebe Halliwell complains once in a while that these demon-of-the-week adventures are really screwing up her career and love-life, that’s relatable.   When she complains about it every week, and has to be convinced to take action every single time, then it starts to make her look like a real piece of shit.   There was one scene where she insists that they shouldn’t risk their lives to save a particular innocent, because if they got killed, then that would doom many more innocent people that they might be able to save later.  That’s kind of messed up.   Maybe there’s a more balanced interpretation to Phoebe’s character, but what I’ve seen looks pretty bad.

Anyway, it occurred to me that this incompleteness is probably what people mean when they compare things negatively with fanfiction.  When it’s in actual fanfic, I think it gets a pass, because the writer’s doing it for free, but when a TV show or movie does it, it gets people mad because there’s higher expectations.   For example, “Charmed” introduced a magic school, very similar to the one in the Harry Potter books, and they even went out of their way to point out the similarity, which seems pretty weak to me.   But the biggest letdown was that it was literally named “Magic School”.   Like, that’s what it says on the sign and everything.   It’s like they never bothered to improve on the working name, like how “Snakes on a Plane” ended up being the actual title of the movie.  They could have called “Merlin Academy”, or “Shadow Hall” or literally anything else, but they were like “Fuck it, ‘Magic School.’“  

For that matter, I never understood calling the main characters “The Charmed Ones”.   That sounds really basic, especially when the main thing about them is that they’re a trio.   Call them the “Witches Three” or “The Triune of Power” or just “The Halliwell Sisters” or whatever.   It’s just such a lack of effort for something that they were going to have to use for the whole run of the series.  On the other hand, they seemed to put a lot of work into the episode where Alyssa Milano played Lady Godiva to defend breastfeeding in public or something.  Which... yeah, sounds like a fanfic plot now that I think about it.

[joelmmd]

kingdom hearts post again. finished kh2!

couldn't bring myself to keep going for 100% and do all of data organization 13. it took me like a day just to beat 2 of the bosses and i wasn't feeling like grinding the rest out after that and Especially wasn't looking forward to doing the same with lw. i'll probably come back to wrap all that up later, though.

i had a lot of fun with the game! one of my complaints with kh1 was that the combat was ~1 layer of depth away from being engaging for the whole 30 or so hours you'd be playing for, and kh2 has remedied it pretty well. forms are cool and add extra strategy when it comes to which one to use and when, keyblades coming with their own abilities makes it worth switching them around for reasons that aren't just "this has the highest strength/magic", and i feel like some of the abilities here are a lot more impactful than the first game's. the new mp system is weird but ultimately good, rewards players for not getting hit for a while and doesn't enable "fuck you" attacks by letting you stock up like 20 cures to make them not matter. not a fan of using cure Once meaning you can't use magic at all until it recharges but it is how it is.

enemy/boss design (gameplay-wise) is still not great. i'm starting to think this is always the case, and that you just don't see the cracks until the game starts demanding really good play from you. it's harder to get mad about some bullshit way you got hit if it only did like 1/5 of your health, but when it starts putting you at 1 hp you have to actually confront the move and realize "wow that's not ok".

the worlds were really good this time around. definitely appreciated how the game stopped caring so much about justifying why you're helping out the disney guy or riding a skateboard or doing a musical, they just let you do it. i didn't hear a thing about "Sora you aren't allowed to meddle in these worlds!!! Let's just get the keyhole and leave" and it was great.

standout mentions are the pirate world for the realistic ass ghouls & CJS's party member icon looking edited in, halloween town for having christmas town in it, lion king world for being the most egregiously "oc" yet (my lion oc is just a kid but he's super strong... he has spiky brown hair and dark fur and attacks with a Weapon instead of claws and stuff), and timeless river for just being great, it's probably my favorite. they all felt a bit short, though. probably a good thing for some of them, but i would've loved to have more to do after finishing them than just fighting mushrooms.

the story sucks dick. feels as bad as the first game's with way more steps to get there. organization 13 are fine antagonists but they're fighting for the spotlight with fucking Pete. and maleficent. pete really doesn't feel like the right character for "harbinger of darkness with plot to take over world". they end up doing jack dick anyways so i have to ask if they're only here to make sure the tone stays light and to keep the focus at least a little on disney.

i also don't like the whole "nobodies don't have feelings and don't exist and dont have hearts so they're basically nonpeople and it's ok that they're never happy" thing, it feels really weird compared to the rest of the game being generally optimistic and hopeful. especially with the game saying "darkness isn't bad and we need both it and light", feels like a step forward and then a step back in philosophy. waste of potential too! it's a lot harder to get invested in any future nobodies (assuming there are any) if you plain up say they don't have emotion or feelings.

i don't know if i'd say the writing's so bad, there were a few charming moments here and there that stuck with me and it was a lot less "No! The darkness... The light of the heart, Kingdom Hearts, the heartless the darkness... Kairi... Your light..." than the first game. part of it's definitely helped by the better voice acting across the board. there were for sure less moments where it got noticeably bad, and they actually bothered to bring in the whole winnie the pooh cast this time. sora's the big winner here, though, his performance here really elevated the character for me. or maybe he's just more interesting with the extra few years under his belt.

lightning round-prologue is neat in how it kind of prepares you for the real game but it's like 3 hours long, sora's new outfit & the form variations are pretty cool, reaction commands aren't as intrusive as i expected, limits are fun but i usually just healed instead, cure becoming an aoe is a change i like a lot, switching the target you're locked onto is bound to right trigger + flick right stick and it fucking sucks, being able to move the camera around while locked on is pretty great, and donald & goofy were a bit more capable this time around. still died a lot but they very rarely got on my nerves.

long, but i think i've said what i wanted to say. fun times. moving on to Dream Drop Distance now, which i've already got my hopes a bit lowered for from trying it out before. can't imagine it's gonna suck or anything though, as long as i can swing my funny keyblade as riku the game can only be so bad.

[letterstwotheuniverse]

003: to you who saved my 2023.

"if this guy stays in my life, then please let it be so."

this line still matters to this day, and bold of me to say it as an understatement, but one person can really change the course of things. among all the people i met this past year - they’re one of those who made me the happiest, and are one of those reasons why I'm still around. again, who knew 10 months would make an impact?

to the person who i got closer to after 2 nights at the harbourfront in my happy place, and who casually said “are you ready to get to know me?”. of course i was, and i was thankful for the trust. the next days, we ended up walking around my favorite city in the world hand in hand talking about the little things and laughs, which made that place and trip so much more meaningful.

to the person who constantly gives the best hugs that are like a ball of warmth and sunshine, a safe space that feel like home incarnate - a hug meant that i was home in their arms, i was safe, protected, and i can cry in peace.

to the person who'd be by my side - physically to hold my hand to make me feel at ease, and give me a forehead kiss and back hug to remind me I was loved, and virtually by making sure i'd sleep easy at night amid thunder and lightning and the dark thoughts in my head - who’d listen to me cry, rant and just laugh at everything under the sun.

to the person who I call my Sully - this person’s nickname on my phone which i never changed since they bought that pouch in HK, and that cuddly blue monster, scary when mad, but a literal softie i'd love to cling on for dear life knowing i'd feel safe.

to the person who is my solitude through thick, thin, and otherwise - who'd take me out after a long day for a meal, drinks, and drives, and who I want to protect and take care of with every fiber of my being (until now). I still have the Pooh they gave me, and I too protect that with every fiber of my being.

admittedly these past few weeks have been a true test of my best friendship with that person, it broke and breaks my heart that things turned cold, that we weren't able to fix this, to be in that same space we were months ago.

but you know, what's funny is as i type this i'm back to the place we first met, and below is my view. the gang was there (which I was honestly scared of), and the air… well still felt different. If I were to be absolutely honest, it’s been different since August - when that person stopped working there - there’s no one randomly back hugging me out of nowhere, or with random exchanges saying, "hey, love. you got this.", and look, I dunno if they already know but that's why I stopped going there during the daytime, and why I’m there at night more - they weren't around to bug me and make my day easier.

it really made me miss that person, what we had, and specifically how we hated not talking to each other for a day or 2. i regret getting so angry with them, when they really were just looking out for me, and it's on me for thinking they were heartless, while I was being an emotional wreck.

(Editor’s note: I tried my nearest not to cry thinking about this while the gang were in the room)

To me, that person was Sully after all - scary when they have to prove a point, but a pure softie when they choose to, while constantly reminding me to be soft, to smile more, and not too hard on myself, even if I can be.

while all of these may not sound believable at this point, and I can guess they’re tired of me talking, know I mean it 101%. even if it hurts, and i miss how things were, I'll always wait for that person through good and bad, highs, and lows, thick and thin, in fights, and in silence, i’ll always hold my word, and i’ll always have their back until my last breath.

i'll always be the same clingy, but a better, reflected best friend waiting for them to come back.

if I had something to tell that person -

i love you for life, my bestie, and I’m sorry it took this long to realize that you meant a lot to me. Thank you for being a huge part of my life, for making the world a better place, for being the star to my moon, and for staying by my side through it all.

I know this doesn’t compensate for the damage done, and I know you’re still hurting; I am too. I hope somehow this lightens the load and makes up for what was done in some way. If I could turn back time to prevent this from happening, I would. We’ve switched places I’d like to think maybe so I realize how hard I’ve been on you, and it was the most humbling yet.

I wrote this in the hopes of bringing back my best friend who’d tell me that I’m not alone is this world, and who’d hug me to stop crying because of how painful it’s been.

I know I’m too late to say this, and it barely means a thing but I can’t stand a day without them. Not a day goes by where I think about how I could’ve trust our friendship through it all, it doesn’t go by without wishing things would be okay, and despite all this, hoping and waiting because in the end, they’ll always have me.

Hasta el fin mundo, Sully, my Snorlax. I’ll always love you through it all.

I talked way too much for this one but I can’t wait till January to say all this.

p.s. a gift - something i updated but hid for the longest time - I’ve gotten back to it because of how I’ve been feeling - wishing I could reverse things.

[ajoytobeheld]

The films of the year! (last year)

January 11th, 2010

Here in no particular order is my fail safe opinionated and completely flawed list of films I enjoyed the most last year. There are a lot of films I did not see, so for all “A Serious Man” and “Antichrist” lovers IM SORRY I DIDNT GET AROUND TO WATCHING THEM! They are on my ilovefilm list, honest. There are also some films missing which I thought were okay, but did not find them as effecting as others, e.g “Let The Right One In” and “Up” but that doesn’t mean I didn’t enjoy them, it just means I am a heartless bitch. Also my memory sucks so I probably left loads out too.

Drag me to hell!

An entertaining B movie pastiche of disgustingness and stupidity with Mr Raimi returning to his “Evil Dead” esque horror comedy roots after the awful “Spiderman 3.” Plus the heroine does battle with a evil handkerchief, and we all love it when linen goes bad.

Moon

Starring lots of Sam Rockwells and Kevin Spacey’s REALLY creepy voice, it’s budget allowed special effects which make “Red Dwarf” seem sophisticated but is a highly original and character driven Sci-Fi film. Yes, it was made by David Bowies son.

Zombie land

Best Bill Murray cameo I can remember.

Inglorious Basterds

This film got bafflingly average reviews despite the fact it is a complete return to form after the film about Kirk Russel killing women WITH HIS CAR!

The acting displayed from Christoph Waltz would make Daniel Day Lewis weep into his cobblers shoes, and the  scene in which the “Basterds” are undercover in the German bar….I was literally hanging off my seat, about to fall unto the floor, gripping the chair of the arm scared…..it was unrelentingly good. Even my mum liked it, and her favorite film is “Shirley Valentine.”

The Hurt Locker

This Katherine Bigelow piece tracks a bomb defusal squad in Iraq and although I am unsure about its slightly one sided patriotic message, it is still an educational, gripping and somewhat disturbing insight into the American army.

Frost/Nixon

One of my favorite films of last year, I knew little to nothing about Watergate or Nixon himself and this film made me learn things which normally I hate! plus Michael Sheen is always an incredibly watch-able and charismatic presence.

Star Trek

It could have sucked, it could have been a sacrilegious experience, but it was entertaining and sensitive to its origins.

Where The Wild Things Are

This is a incredibly brave and incredibly heartbreaking film which shows that Mr Jonze does not bend to the will of studios, it explores the confusion of childhood so perfectly and really pulls the “Stand By Me” esque punches. Perfect. BRING TISSUES.

In The Loop

I love Armando Iannucci very hard, plus its nice to know what “My Girl” is up to. The political ramifications this film depicts are also somewhat terrifying.

Hunger

I love Michael Fassbender very hard as well, and this biopic of political prisoner and hunger strike participant Bobby Sands is a uneasy viewing experience… he was also great in the disturbing “Eden Lake.”

Milk

A heartbreakingly beautiful biopic with the guy from High School Musical.

Public Enemies

There was something about this which sparked me despite its glaring errors and flaws (e.g filming on digital and Christian “continually disappointing” Bale.) I think its the unrelenting charisma of Marion Cottilard and Johnny Depp.

Coraline

A incredibly terrifying “kids” film with wreaths of imagination and darkness to boot.

My Least Favourite Film of the Year: (500) Days of Summer. It has to be seen to be believed how try hard and awful it is. I would recommend going out and watching it right now, honestly. Do it.

Ellen x

[stoneyamajiki]

thoughts on things

yeah i dont know how to handle everything that had happened. was ii in love? if i was, it definitely would not feel like this, right? it happened so fast and now i have to deal that he is now another person that wont be apart of my future. all the things we promised, i did it again. i let my guard down and let someone love me and i let myself love, and here we are.... square one. it's not like i wasnt a bad person either, i had my flaws and i took it out on him, i let my own toxic ways get in the way so did he. yes, we tried and tried again to work on us but things just kept coming up. i dont know why i did what i did, i had a heartless moment and then when i seen our true colors i realized that we had demons and we let them ruin us. not a day would go by, even in our early moment in the relationship, we fought and fought over little stuff. now to find out many things towards the end? it was all a joke. a waste of time and now when i think that i was about to commit my life to him, i laugh sadly because what was i thinking. thinking i could live happily ever happy with someone who didnt want to see me shine, who admittedly was jealous of me and who made me feel bad on the daily. was it ever love? was i too caught up with the thought of being loved so much that i overlooked all the deathly toxic signs that were being held right in front of me? i cant say i miss him because everyone had seen our true colors but all we seen were our favorite in each others eyes. i did love him with all my heart at one point, i was about to plan a wedding. just sad to see the end and know the outcome even if you guys wanted to work out. in the end im happy for lessons ive learned along the way. i thank him, but respectfully i no longer have to time to let myself be dragged by someone who doesnt want to succeed and who doesnt want to see me succeed. so, i'll continue on with my life as i always did. let myself hurt because i deserve that but it's time to let myself in that healing era everyone talks about. im just sad that our firsts were the lasts from the start, its sad to think we became so mean and we were comfortable with that, we changed each other so much to the point where we didnt regconixe one another and yet we still loved eachother with everything we had. i would've died for him if it came down to it but thats not right as im told because nowadays, you have to choose yourself. i must.

[subtletruamadumping]

A Pitch Black Room, A Velvet Ribbon, A Secret Box

______________________________________________________________

This was my first year doing NaNoWriMo. It started as a writing prompt (the title is literally just the prompt) and it's a collection of short stories from many different peoples' perspectives linked by various objects. I won this year but never looked back at it. In fact, I am kind of embarrassed by it but I try to remind myself I was literally a child. Instead of being broken up into chapters, it's broken into characters.

Written in November 2016

______________________________________________________________

Part 1, Natalie

Natalie laid and stared at the ceiling in the pitch black room, twisting the velvet ribbon in between her fingers. It had been a few weeks since the sleepover had ended. She hadn’t spent much time with the others since then. She had, however, been spending a lot of time with Preston. She hadn’t believed them when they claimed how mean he had been when she wasn’t around. She was sure they were just feeling jealous that they were still single. Except for Brooklyn, probably. But you could never really be sure where Brook stood on an issue. She had always thought of Preston as sweet and kind. It had never entered her mind that he might not really be such a gentleman. That is, until their date that had been a few hours ago.

She had been excited, as she usually was for a date. And why shouldn’t she be? He was planning on taking her to a movie, then to get dinner at her favorite restaurant. She had planned accordingly and had worn a nice shirt with a skirt. She had even thoughtfully decided to where the ribbon he had given her for her birthday in her hair for the date. The ribbon was a soft purple, a great piece to pull together her black shirt and lavender shirt. Of course, the outfit was more planned around the ribbon than the places they were going to attend. She loved the ribbon dearly. She had been so flattered that he had been so thoughtful and present it as a gift to her.

She rolled over uncomfortably in her bed. Why had he really given her the ribbon? Brooklyn had once said something about men giving their wives jewelry as to claim them, like an animal claims it’s territory. She said something like it was their way of showing that the woman belonged to them. A way of telling other guys to back off. Natalie thought about this more as she twisted and turned the ribbon in her hands. The ribbon could easily have been his way of saying publicly announcing that he didn’t want any other guys messing with her. But most of the things Brooklyn also said were about psychology and things that couldn’t be helped. Maybe it wasn’t a conscious choice and he actually thought that he was just giving her a gift. That didn’t explain the reports she was getting about his rude manner, though.

Again, she rolled over. She had witness his heartlessness first hand tonight. She had thought it was going to be a simple movie and dinner. She had thought he was going to be the kind gentleman as usual. And he was. Just, not to her.

When he went to go purchase their tickets for the movie, he flirted a little with the girl in the ticketbooth. Though annoyed, Natalie had initially ignored it. He had done little things like this before, but had always come back around. She crossed her arms and he quickly broke off the flirtatious conversation. They walked inside and he promised her he wasn’t forgetting about her. He said that he had been in the same home room as her last year and was just trying to catch up. Natalie asked why that meant he had to flirt with her. He claimed he hadn’t been flirting and that he would never flirt with another girl (as he always did when confronted with this question). She hadn’t been completely satisfied, but had dropped it so that they could enjoy the night.

The movie hadn’t been Natalie’s choice. Come to think of it, he had never really given her a choice as to where their dates would be located. She had plenty of ideas for nice places to go, but he never asked and she rarely had the chance to voice her opinion about these things. She didn’t want to seem ungrateful or annoying. The movie was definitely a boy movie. Explosions, cars, and gun fights. Natalie would have much preferred a romantic comedy. You know, something you would watch on a date. She had told him she really didn’t like action movies, but he stated that this was the only good movie out. It wasn’t like they could just skip the movie or anything. She had bucked up and bore it, though she was mostly just bored out of her mind. 

When the movie was over, Preston had stopped by the girl at the ticket booth again. Natalie had to remind him numerous times that they couldn’t stay out much later than she had promised her parents. She probably would have been better of waving her arms and shouting “Hello?! I’m your girlfriend, not her! I’m the one you’re on this date with!” It probably would have had the same effect on Preston, but a much more direct one on the girl.

Natalie had gone back to being optimistic about the date when they had gotten away from the ticket girl. Without this distraction, she would have her date back. Though she wasn’t exactly happy that she had to win back her own boyfriend, she had remembered that she was going to try her best to enjoy the night. Preston had made a good choice in choosing her favorite place to eat for dinner. She mentioned it to him on the car ride over.

“Really?” He asked, obviously surprised by this “I’m glad I picked it then.” Natalie frowned.

“I’ve told you that before.” She said, crossing her arms “I thought that’s why you picked it.”

“No, you never told me that.”

“Yes, I did.”

“Well, then I just forgot. Don’t stress about it.”

“You forget a lot of things.” She muttered unhappily.

“Oh, don’t get like that.” He said, rolling his eyes “I don’t forget that much. I’m only human, okay?”

“Fine, whatever. Let’s just have dinner and get home before too late. My parents will kill me if we don’t.”

They made it to the restaurant and took a table, looking over the menu to order. Natalie noticed how Preston wasn’t talking to her as much as normal. Probably annoyed about her mentioning him forgetting things. She shouldn’t have brought it up. But still, she wasn’t going to apologize for it. It wasn’t like he could get away with things like that forever. She realized the entire evening was going to be dampered, now. She sighed and put down her menu.

The waitress was a very pretty girl. Actually, Natalie knew her. She was in the grade below them. She was terrible at chemistry and complained about it all the time loudly. So loudly, Natalie could hear her across the cafeteria. Not only did Natalie know the waitress, but the waitress knew Preston. They exchanged greetings. He even called her by her name. Natalie frowned again, beginning to see a trend. Had this been happening all along and she had just been blind to it? Had Preston gone off the deep end? Did he want to stop seeing her? Natalie quickly pushed these thoughts out of her mind and stated her order when the waitress and her boyfriend and finished “catching up”. She was also starting to realize how loose of a term that was. She looked down at her feet, feeling the inevitable creeping up on her. She probably should have listened to her friends sooner. But, as of now, her internal lie detector was on full alert.

“How often do you come here?” Natalie asked when the waitress had gone away.

“Oh, not too often.” Preston said casually.

Truth. He had taken a while to look over the menu. Preston would have known exactly what he had wanted if he had been here more than “not too often”. Then, what made him choose this place? It obviously wasn’t because of his intimate knowledge of Natalie’s likes and dislikes.

“Who told you about this place?” She asked innocently, sipping her drink “I mean, someone had to let you know about this little place.”

And it apparently wasn’t me. She added to herself.

“Oh, you know,” Preston said, still keeping the laziness in his voice “one of my guy friends. You remember Isaac, right?”

Lie. He hasn’t talked to Isaac in a few weeks. Isaac has been out of town. Isaac is a vegetarian. He wouldn’t be eating here, anyway.

“Oh, yes, of course.” Natalie replied flatly “Did you know that Hazel was working here? Small world, huh?”

“Oh, yeah, what a surprise.” Preston said with a charming smile, playing with his own cup.

Lie. His smile was so fake it was painful. He had put his cup in between them. Brooklyn had told her that this was a sign of someone lying. Trying to put as many obstacles as they can between the person they’re lying to.

“I never get to talk to her anymore.” Natalie said “I just don’t the time like I used to.” This was a lie of her own. She never talked to Hazel. She was incredibly self centered and rude. Desperate time called for desperate measures, though so Natalie played as if they had been best friends since Kindergarten and had tragically been separated rater recently.

“Oh, yeah, me neither.” Preston said “I mean, I don’t think I’ve talked to her in a year, now. That’s why I’m doing all this catching up.”

Lie. He was in that chemistry class with her. He wasn’t exactly brilliant. Natalie twisted her napkin in her lap to keep from making a face as she listened to him.

“Really? I thought you had chemistry with her.” Natalie said, still trying to sound completely innocent. His smile faded a little, but he quickly brought it back.

“Oh, really? I don’t really know who’s in that class. I cut it a lot.”

Lie. Well, probably not the cutting class part, but the part where he claimed not to know that she as in his class.

“Right.” Natalie said emotionlessly. There was an unpeaceful quite over the table as Natalie poked at her salad with her fork. She didn’t look up at Preston. She didn’t really want to ever see him again at the moment.

“You look really nice, tonight.” Preston said, probably trying to make up for everything “When did you get that ribbon?” Natalie couldn’t help from putting her fork down rather hard.

“The ribbon?” She asked, almost glaring at him.

“Yeah,” He said, looking confused “where’d you get it? Is it new?”

“You gave it to me.” She said shortly. He blinked and cocked his head to the side.

“I did? When?” Natalie was about to snap at him when the waitress came back, handing him the check. His eyes followed her as she walked away. Natalie stood up.

“Hey, where are you going?” Preston asked, quickly getting out of his own seat. Natalie ignored him and made a bee-line for the door. Surprisingly (or, maybe not so), he didn’t follow her. She exited the building with a huff, blood boiling. She took a few breaths to calm herself down, then started the walk home, her thoughts completely occupied by how much she hated Preston.

And now, here she was. At home. In bed. Her parents hadn’t asked about the date. They stopped asking after the fourth one. As long as she came home in time, they didn’t care. She had gone straight to her room without talking to them. She had closed the door, sat down on her bed, then cried.

The tears didn’t last long, though. She was more upset at herself than Preston. She shouldn’t have been so closed minded to what her friends were telling her earlier. She should have been able to see through him. Oh, well. Couldn’t change it, now.

You live and you learn. She had told herself, getting up to change into her night clothes This just means you’ll never get stuck dating a jerk again.

She continued to twist ribbon in between her fingers in the pitch black room. There was no way she was going to be seeing him after this. He probably wouldn’t care that much. It didn’t matter. Natalie was moving away from this and she vowed not to go back. Tomorrow, she would give him back the ribbon. She’d make him take it. She wasn’t going to listen to anything he said, no matter how nice it sounded. She had learned her lesson and she wasn’t going to make the same mistake twice.What was that expression Brook used? She thought Oh, right. “Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me”. She sighed and closed her eyes. There was no way she was going to be fooled twice. She slowly drifted off, the ribbon in her hands and she in the pitch black room.

[wandaromanova]

Geek

Pairing: Natasha Romanoff x Fem!Reader

Warnings: cussing, sexual suggestion, that’s all!

A/N: hello! hope you guys like this! happy reading <3

anon requested: Hi Kass! Could I request a super fluffy clingy Nat that’s trying to take her girlfriend shopping for video games and completely geeks out about like collectibles, games and other stuff? If you’re okay with it of course.

Summary: Y/N supports Natasha’s gaming addiction, despite not being a gamer herself.

Word Count: 1.5K

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please do not repost or try and take ownership of my work. reblogs, likes, and comments are always welcome. <3

“Come on, babe!”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

You rolled your eyes as your girlfriend, Natasha, pulled you by your hand and towards a store, GameStop, to be exact. 

The redhead has always had a love for video games, which surprised you, in all honesty. It wasn’t exactly the fact that she was a gamer that shocked you, it was more like her favorite game was an unexpected one; Minecraft. 

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

Yeah. Natasha Romanoff, the world’s deadliest assassin, absolutely loved to play Minecraft.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

She had a thing for creating various buildings in survival mode. There was something soothing about going out and finding supplies to use that got your girlfriend all excited. 

Natasha played the game on the computer you had in the living room of your shared apartment, not having a game station of her own. So, you took the liberty of buying a brand new PS5 for her just because. Now, the redhead was on the hunt for a PlayStation Store gift card to purchase the BedRock version of Minecraft. 

Truthfully, you didn’t know the difference, regardless of how many times Natasha had tried to explain it to you. Although you tried to understand it, considering how much your girlfriend adored the game. 

“So… what’s the difference between the one on your computer and the one you’re trying to buy from the online store?” 

You questioned your girlfriend as she dragged you towards the gift card section, her eyes scanning the plethora of cards for the one she needed. 

“The Java Edition is the original version of the game that was created for PC users, which is the one I’ve been using. You can do multiplayer with other PC users.

You nodded your head as she spun around the gift card stand, her other hand still firmly holding your own. 

“The BedRock Edition is for gaming consoles. This version allows cross-platform multiplayer mode, which means I can play Minecraft with anyone, regardless of their console.”

Her eyes lit up when she caught sight of what she had been looking for. 

“Considering there hasn’t been a release of Minecraft for the PS5, I have to purchase it online, with this gift card.” 

Natasha smiled triumphantly when her eyes landed on what she was looking for. She selected the card and proudly presented it to you, a wide smile spread across her face.

“Ta-daaa, my ticket into the realms.” Natasha scrunched her nose up while lowering her voice into an ominous tone. You couldn’t help but let out a small giggle at her antics. 

“Is there anything else you want, nerd?” You looked around the busy store. God, there were so many weird people here, nerds.

“Okay, first of all… I’m a geek, not a nerd. If you’re gonna do something, do it right.” Natasha sassed and you raised your eyebrow at her as she began to pull you towards the collectibles section, not before shoving the gift card into your free hand. 

“Potato, patato.” Natasha flipped you off, lifting her middle finger up behind her back as she guided you through the busy store. 

You let out a chuckle, then suddenly, Natasha let go of your hand and practically ran towards your destination. 

“Babe! Look!! It’s a baby panda plushie!!” Natasha snatched the stuffed animal off of one of the shelves and quickly whipped around as you caught up with her. 

“Wow… very cool…” Your voice lacked enthusiasm and the redhead sent you a glare, landing a soft punch on your shoulder. 

“Uh, don’t even try and act like this isn’t cool. The panda is my favorite animal mod! They do cute little tricks when you feed them bamboo.”

Natasha hugged the plushie close to her chest. She gave you the best puppy dog eyes she could muster, paired with pouty lips. 

“Can I please get the baby panda? I’ll give you head later if you get it for me.” You let out a genuine laugh at your girlfriend’s words. 

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

She was really bribing you with sex in order to get a stuffed panda; adorable. 

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“I mean I was going to get it for you anyway, but I’m definitely not declining that offer.” 

Natasha let out a small squeal before pulling you into a bone-crushing hug. You winced, not being able to breathe. 

“Babe, I- I kinda need to be alive to buy it for you…” You croaked out and the redhead loosened her hold on you, pulling back to peck your lips repeatedly. 

Natasha let go of you and turned around to face the section once more. Her eyes lit up when she caught sight of another piece of Minecraft merch. 

“Baby, look. It’s a torch-shaped water bottle! It looks exactly like the ones in the game.” Natasha tucked the panda under her arm, reaching out to grab the item that was on a higher shelf. 

The Russian let out a huff when she failed to reach the water bottle. Shaking your head, you made your way over to her, placing a hand on her waist as you grabbed the bottle with ease. 

Natasha rolled her eyes at you as you handed the object to her, a cocky smirk on your face.

“Show off…” Natasha muttered as she turned around to face you, staring at the water bottle in awe. She was freaking out over how detailed the design was and you’d be lying if you said it wasn’t the cutest shit you’ve ever seen. 

“I’ll get it for you if I can get head, twice.” Natasha looked up at you with a smirk on her face, her eyes focusing on your face. 

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Deal.” 

•❅──────────────── ‎⧗ ────────────────❅•

A few hours later 

“Natty, dinner is ready.” You called out from the kitchen, your eyes lifting up to eye your girlfriend. 

She was sat on the couch in the living room, playing the version of Minecraft she had just downloaded. 

Natasha completely ignored you, too entranced by the video game.

With a sigh, you made your way out of the kitchen and sat beside the redhead, finally gaining her attention. 

“Baby, the graphics are so much better on this version than the other one.” You focused on the screen and watched as she opened the door of a home she built while you cooked dinner. 

“Look at all my dogs! I killed a ton of skeletons and got their bones so I could tame a shit ton of dogs.” Natasha smiled while your eyes widened. 

In a room of the house, there was nothing but dogs. The barks could be heard through the surround sound. 

“Jesus, Nat. How many do you have?” You couldn’t believe that she managed to find that many dogs. You’d watched her play a few times and you knew that it took a ton of time to come across dogs in the wild. 

“I have thirty. Aren’t they the cutest?” You turned your head to face Natasha’s side profile, a smirk making its way to your face. 

“Can I try?” You asked sweetly and Natasha immediately handed you the controller, showing you which buttons did what, before letting you play. 

You let out a small laugh as you began to hit the dogs with your hands, spamming the strike button as much as you could. 

Natasha let out a scream as the dogs yelped, your hits injuring them. You’d known this was possible because the redhead cried when she accidentally killed her dog on the PC a few months ago.

Seriously, she was devastated. This woman could kill men without flinching, but she cried for weeks after killing her virtual dog.

“Y/N! What the fuck are you doing? Stop!” Natasha exclaimed, yanking the controller out of your hand while you laughed uncontrollably. 

“I’m sorry, I had to. They’re not real and there are way too many! You can’t possibly take care of them all. It’s a small price to pay for salvation.” 

Natasha sent you a harsh glare, creases forming on her forehead. You let out a small sigh, wrapping your arms around her waist.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“You’re heartless. I’m dating a puppy murderer.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

The redhead grumbled out as she tried to get out of your grip, but you wouldn’t let her. 

“I’m sorry. I love you.” You shoved your face into her neck, your words coming out muffled against her skin. 

“No. Go fuck yourself. You killed two of my puppies.” The seriousness of Natasha’s tone sent you into another laughing fit. 

You pulled your face away from her neck, and sneaked a few kisses on her lips before placing one on her nose. 

Natasha tried her best to keep a straight face, but that didn’t last long. Her lips curled upward and she shook her head, cupping your cheek with one hand, and kissing you deeply. 

You disconnected your lips and stared into her emerald eyes. Her forehead was pressed up against yours as her eyes scanned your face.

“God, you’re such a nerd.” You breathed out when Natasha pulled her face back from yours slightly, a faux look of annoyance and offense across her features.ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“For the last time, I’m a geek, not a nerd!” Natasha huffed out and your eyes softened, a playful smirk on your face. You absolutely adored her and loved to piss her off whenever you could.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“They’re interchangeable terms for loser.” 

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Fuck you.” 

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“I mean… I was promised head.” 

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“I revoke that promise.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Hey! That’s not how promises work!”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

───────── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ──────────

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[bluexiao]

if requests are open, may i request scaramouche, lisa and hu tao (if you write for her) with a dendro reader? i'm sorry if it's too vague!

Falling for them as a Dendro Vision Holder

—in which you are a dendro vision holder who works as a nurse and fate led you to meet them one way or another

CHARACTERS: Scaramouche, Lisa, Hu Tao; gn!reader

WARNINGS: several curse words from scaramouche. also a few spoilers from lisa’s story (which i’m sure most have already known? but it’s not that explicitly said so it’s fine)

THEME: fluff. first meetings. character analysis?

NOTES: i honestly am so confused how to write this but hopefully this is fun enough to read! I didn’t imply much about the vision because it’s difficult? But it’s there! Also, scara is apparently the character i usually enjoy writing hahahah. To anyone who wants to request for scara when i open my requests, bring them on!And yep i changed a bit of my posts?? I think it looks better this way? Idk what do you guys think? Should i keep this kind of theme?

SCARAMOUCHE

You were one of the nurses that were part of the medical team that was assigned to his team one time and apparently, that was one of the rare times that he came back to the camp; heavily injured, due to some altercation it seems

He demanded for the most competent out of all of you, and apparently, everyone had their gaze on you and he glared at you, telling you to hurry the f up

Fortunately, you were able to treat him with the care that he was pleased at and it was when he questioned you how his injuries healed quicker than he expected, you answered him that it was about your Dendro Vision.

He became interested that day—not romantically yet but he felt like you were someone who he can actually entrust something with

Since then, he seems to have given some sort of favoritism towards you. It’s not really obvious enough at first but whenever he’s on another mission, you were always there in his team. You only found out when someone whispered to you that he actually personally asks for your presence in his missions.

You didn’t think much of it, however, people began chattering about it that it reached his ears one day and he was really mad about it

“Have you worthless imbeciles got nothing else to do but spread false rumors about somebody else? Fine then, you and you, go to the front lines and make sure you come back alive and well. The medical team wouldn’t be helping your as*es off when you return.”

He wouldn’t actually care about the talks about the two you, but he would be a little bit harsher with you, all the while still showing favoritism in his own way. In his mind, it would only fade as time passes, and it did, of course.

The transition for a romantic relationship is difficult, let’s be real. He’s a Fatui Harbinger, you’re merely his lackey at this point. Let’s say you like him already and I tell you, he’d immediately sense that if you are not too careful.

For him, relationships or maybe the concept of love itself may sound like a weakness. It is only natural for him to reject you if you try to make a move on him, but if you show him your competence and strength, that would be one step to making you look attractive to him.

He’s a powerful man, not just by his title, of course, he’d want someone who can “equal” him, me thinks. It may sound unfair but yeah that’s how it goes. Harbingers are molded to be heartless, you won’t find his heart if you don’t make an effort to do so.

“Oh? I didn’t know you could fight too. Interesting… why didn’t you train for offense? Either way, you proved yourself worthy, Y/n.”

If you show him that you can defeat enemies with your vision, then that will surely pique his interest.

And did he just call and refer to you with your name? Huge improvement

Honestly, even if you don’t have powerful abilities and you’re just strong in your own way, he’d definitely be intrigued and would want to get to know you more. It’s a process though since he did seem like he wasn’t an impulsive person.

By the time you got him looking at you, that’s the only moment you’d show that you do feel something more for him. It’s not that guaranteed, but it is safer than when he practically was supposed to hate you.

“Are you seriously flirting with me?” he’d smirk and huff a scoff, “You’ve got the guts, huh? Well then, ready yourself, you’re staying with me on our raid tomorrow. I expect no failure, understood?”

LISA

She probably met you while she was studying in Sumeru Academia, at that time you were doing the same for your own medical studies.

You were the one who was amazed by her intelligence and basically as a whole itself.

She doesn’t give much effort to her works but that seems to be only on the surface for she does work just as hard as everyone else. You’ve always seen her in the library and even if she does sleep there a couple of times, she does read lots of books. And she’s also a fast reader.

You admired her from afar, and you thought she didn’t know a single thing about you until you found yourself being approached by her one day in the same library you always go to—where she reads in as well

“Hey there, cutie. I always see you around here, perhaps, are you one of my admirers?” she says in a sweet manner, but before you could retaliate, she giggles softly and proceeds to take a seat beside you. For a moment there you could tell that she’s quite graceful with her movements in a way.

“I’m just kidding, although it seems that you study a lot here that it made me curious about what you study about.”

She has a way of making things sound easy and not of a big deal, that’s why you two immediately became friends right after that encounter.

It’s really quite easy to fall for her, honestly. What’s difficult is knowing if she has feelings for you too. She’s practically flirting to anyone she finds attractive and even if it’s quite subtle, as one who knows her better, it would be clear to you.

“You’re saying that you can make poison with your Vision, but you still pursued the medical field. I must say, that’s brave of you, cutie.”

She would help you in your studies, even with your training as a Vision holder, and she’s really knowledgable so you can ask her several things even if it shouldn’t be part of her usual line of intelligence.

She doesn’t really care if your abilities are dangerous she trusts you enough to hangout with you even if there are people who are afraid of your abilities.

It’s really hard not to fall for her deeper than before because of the way she acts. So when she left the school and went to Mondstadt, it hurt you that you cannot follow her. It’s not like she did tell you about it until the day she left. She also told you about the reason why and it ended up with you convincing yourself that you should finish your years in the academy to be a licensed nurse and help her in any way possible.

And yes, it took a while before you and her saw each other once again.

“You didn’t have to do it for me, there’s nothing else that could help me now, and I’ve accepted it over time.”

You don’t, and when she sensed that you wouldn’t anytime soon, she let you be, but she urged you to spend a lot of time with her since

“I don’t want to regret not spending time with someone I like the most now would I?”

HU TAO

Most likely, when you two first met, it was during her work

It was a really humorous encounter actually since she got introduced to you, a professional licensed nurse who her “client” insisted on seeing since Dr. Baizhu was out for the moment

Apparently, she was trying to convince her “client” to avail her services because they have an illness that was fatal but it’s not like they will pass away anytime soon

In the end, you were able to help her gain a client since it was indeed a fatal illness and there was nothing wrong to avail the services of the funeral parlor

You didn’t get to see her after that, not until you bumped into her one day in the harbor and she offered to treat you to a meal. Apparently, she was grateful for your “help” and she felt the need to repay you. If you deny, she’d say;

“None of that! Now come on, let’s eat! Oh! Do you want to go to Wanmin Restaurant or—on second thought, let’s order there instead! Maybe Chef Mao might be interested in accepting my offer today.”

When Chef Mao did, she called you her lucky charm afterwards.

And one day, while she was helping you gather herbs since she insisted to, you were attacked by monsters and that was the day you two found out that your vision elements compliment each other.

“Uwahh! That’s one of the best fights I’ve had! We fit so well, don’t we?”

It’s difficult to know if she likes you as a friend or more, but she’s pretty straightforward—more than the two above. If she likes you romantically, she’d say it.

“Hey hey, I like you. Oh? I wasn’t too obvious? Hmm… I thought I was. So? Do you like me too? Wanna go on a date with me, yea?”

[schmergo]

As you might have gathered from some of the statuses I've posted this past week, I'd been re-watching the 2006 BBC Jane Eyre miniseries in honor of Valentine's Day (no, I will not accept criticisms), and although this is still probably my favorite adaptation of the book, can I just say, CAN WE PLEASE EVER GET A VERSION OF JANE EYRE WHERE BOTH OF THE TWO LEADS ARE NOT CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE???

The book keeps going on and on about, "Oh, Mr. Rochester is not handsome, he kinda looks like a Sasquatch, but I'm into that, IDK" and "No rich gentleman would ever want to marry me because I'm so plain and unattractive, not even one who looks like a Sasquatch." There are some pretty intense digs at both characters' looks in the book and they kept them in the miniseries without changing them, and it almost felt like I was in an alternate dimension with the same beauty standards as that one Twilight Zone episode. You know the one.

True, Ruth Wilson is a little bit of an unconventional beauty (and, I must say, fantastic in the role), but she's still played Hedda Gabler. Nobody who has EVER played Hedda Gabler can be expected to say lines with a straight face like, "Do you think, because I am poor, obscure, plain, and little, I am soulless and heartless?" In the scene where she draws contrasting portraits of herself and the hot lady she thinks Rochester wants to marry, it's almost confusing because it's just, like, two lovely portraits of pretty women. It feels like that SNL skit where the hosts are like, "Who wore it better? THEY BOTH LOOK NICE!!!!" Like, yeah, Jane wears ugly gray dresses and severe hairstyles and she doesn't have 'Hollywood' teeth, but she also has a SNAAAATCHED waist, beautiful eyes, and a flawless complexion. She pulls off the no-makeup makeup look in a way that instagram skincare influencers could only dream of. If 2006 Ruth Wilson went back in time to the 1830's, men would have fits of apoplexy falling over each other proposing to her.

So yeah, I would say they made Ruth Wilson, like, "Hollywood homely" for the movie, but Toby Stephens as Mr. Rochester was just... laughable. I don't say that to insult him! It's not his fault he's not ugly! He did a great job! I very much enjoyed his performance and I actually think they styled him perfectly for the role-- which is quite a feat, given that he's got ginger hair and blue eyes in real life, not what you'd expect out of a guy who's the stereotypical dark, brooding type. But OH MY GOSH. Dude has the slightly rugged but still classically symmetrical look of a male model who has a bit of sun damage from spending too much time picking up babes on the beach. If Toby Stephens' version of Rochester is supposed to be ugly, the rest of us are doomed. The rest of us are basically crusty limpets on a dehydrated desolate rock if he's ugly. 

When Jane's having a conversation with him early in the miniseries, she's kinda staring at him, trying to figure him out because he's kind of weird and unpredictable, and he says sarcastically, "Oh, do you think me handsome?" and she blurts out, "No sir." And he's like, "What if I told you I have 20,000 pounds a year? Would I then become handsome?" and she savagely says something along the lines of, "I don't think anything in science would allow that, sir."

My favorite line in the whole darn book is after he's badly injured in a horrible accident near the end (won't spoil what happens for those of you who don't know the ending; I didn't know the ending the first time I read the book and it GOT ME GOOD) and he says, "Am I hideous, Jane?" And she says, "Very, sir. You always were, you know." It's HILARIOUS because it's not at all what you'd expect from someone who's frankly having a very emotional reunion with the person she loves who has experienced a life-altering tragedy. But in the miniseries, it was hilarious in a very different way because... dude looks great. Dashing, even. 

My friend joked that his appearance after getting injured was basically the treatment they gave to Gerard Butler in Phantom of the Opera, but honestly, it was even more pathetic. He had some very faint scarring around one cheek bone/eye socket that I didn't even notice at first and a contact lens that made one pupil look sort of oversized and oblong-shaped, giving him kinda a David Bowie vibe, and he had a bandage wrapped around his hand. If you saw your boyfriend looking like that, you might think he got in a moderate car accident and had a sprained wrist and a bit of a concussion. I'd think that if you already had a very handsome Rochester cast, you wouldn't be afraid he'd be too ugly for the screen if he actually looked seriously injured, but nooooooo.

 Again, not to spoil what injured him, but he was lucky to have escaped with his life. In the book, he had one eye knocked out and was temporarily blinded in the other, and one of his hands was amputated entirely, as well as having some minor burns on his forehead and eyebrows. They could at least have given him an eyepatch instead of just having him squint a little. Oh, and supposedly, his hair was supposed to be really overgrown and unkempt and tangled because nobody was looking after it, and they kept the part in the miniseries where Jane is like, "Oh my gosh, let me comb your hair, it's a mess," but... his hair looked great? Certainly better than mine ever has. 

On a less goofy note, I think Jane Eyre has a bit of a special significance for most of us who grew up feeling like we were too ugly to see ourselves in Disney princess movies or rom-coms or, heck, Jane Austen novels. As messed-up as that book is (I love it, though), it felt like the first time I ever saw a woman who wasn't conventionally attractive actually experience romantic feelings and have them returned. Before I read Jane Eyre, I was only capable of seeing myself in comic relief characters and villains and ugly dude characters whose storylines aren't defined by romance. The first time I read the book, I didn't really 'get it'-- I think I wasn't mature enough yet in 8th grade-- but I remember when I had my first real, serious crush a year or so later, I thought, "I think I'm ready to read Jane Eyre again," and wow, did it pack a punch. 

The book totally nails how it feels to develop feelings for another person for the first time when you never really saw yourself as the type of person who gets into relationships. It also captures how it feels to be drawn to another person and become so fond of and appreciative of their features because they're theirs, even if they don't initially seem to be society's ideal of beauty. (Most young teens are still in an awkward phase and growing into ourselves. Our first romantic interests don't usually look like Hollywood stars, and nor do we.) It felt like there was something real in Jane Eyre that I hadn't yet seen in other books with romance plot lines, even though there are so many wildly improbable and bizarre and awful elements of that story that would and should NEVER happen today.

It would be great to see an adaptation of Jane Eyre that keeps that vibe in mind. We've had a few where Rochester isn't your typical leading man, but it seems like in those cases, they cast an even more than usually beautiful Jane to compensate. It might be a bit of a tough sell to hold a casting call: "ARE YA UGLY BUT STILL HAVE THAT CERTAIN SOMETHING THAT MAKES PEOPLE GO, 'HOOO, THEY'RE NOT MY USUAL TYPE BUT I'M KINDA INTO IT????' Step right up!" But let me tell ya, it sure feels weird to watch a screen adaptation of the only 'ugly people in love' story I'd ever experienced other than DANG SHREK as a young person, at a much more self-confident and mature place with regards to your appearance than you were back then, and be like, "Wow, I'd never even be considered for this role because I'm still too homely to play the homely romantic lead!"