So I just finished the *Fourteenth* and final chapter in "A Series of Unfortunate Events", and let. Me. Tell. You
I’m cursing Lemony Snicket’s name right now.
Let’s start off with one of his famous quotes, shall we? This pretty much sums up what was happening in my room last night…
“There is a kind of crying I hope you have not experienced, and it is not just crying about something terrible that has happened, but a crying for all of the terrible things that have happened, not just to you but to everyone you know and to everyone you don’t know and even the people you don’t want to know, a crying that cannot be diluted by a brave deed or a kind word, but only by someone holding you as your shoulders shake and your tears run down your face.”
Only I had no one to hold me as my shoulders shook and tears ran down my face (I’m being completely literal here, Jacquelyn and Gustav would have nothing to gripe about).
I can’t remember the last time a book made me legit cry. Tear up, sure. Drop a few tears on the page, absolutely. We were beyond that. I was full-on ugly sobbing and gasping for breath.
*Spoilers ahead (like, ALL the spoilers), if you’ve not read the books, so consider yourself warned*
I first started to lose it when the poisoned islanders sailed off with Ishmael (I refuse to call him “Ish” out of pure spite), with Ink following them with an apple, and the kids never saw him again.
I cried when Count Olaf tried to help them save Kit, and then kissed her, because oh my gosh, Count Olaf loves Kit Snicket aND WHEN DID I DEVELOP COUNT OLAF FEELS!!!
I cried when Olaf died.
I cried when Kit gave birth and died.
I cried for Dewey Denoument, and Justice Strauss who died in the hotel.
I cried for Uncle Monty, finally (been sitting on that one for a few weeks).
I cried for the Quagmires (WHAT THE HELL SNICKET???), because they could have gone with Kit and found the Baudelaires, but now Great Unknown, and they’ll never see them again (I suppose I have to take it as a small mercy that the triplets reunited, at least).
I cried because Violet, Klaus and Sunny are parents now, and will be better parents than literally ANYONE in the world, and Sunny is only about TWO YEARS older than Baby Beatrice (don’t even get me started on naming the baby BEATRICE).
I cried for Lemony Snicket who now has no one and no family left.
I did not cry for Mr. Poe. Not one bit.
I cried for Violet and Quigley.
I cried for Klaus because of Fiona (SCREW THAT B–TCH).
I even cried that not one of Olaf’s original iconic henchmen were still alive.
AND I CRIED ABOUT THE DAMN SUGAR BOWL. I kept expecting it to wash up on the Island where EVERYTHING eventually ends up, but it neVER DID, DAMN MCGUFFIN TROPE
That series wrecked. me.
And I cried because I resonated with the Baudelaire kids on a strangely profound level. More than I’ve ever resonated with child characters before, because right now, deep down, I feel just as lonely, isolated, and abandoned as the Baudelaires, with just my family to hold on to, and a happy ending seems as impossible for me as it was for them.
THIS WAS SUPPOSED TO BE A FUN, SILLY LITTLE SET OF KID’S BOOKS, WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED
And yet, the only thing I want to do right now is buy the whole series for my own (I got them all through the library in about three chunks) and start it again from the beginning.
I couldn’t sleep, turning everything over and over and over in my head.
And I decided that the kids are safe. Maybe not forever, but for right now. And they’re venturing out back into the world older, wiser, on their own terms, with no one chasing them (who’s even left who knows their names, besides the last Snicket sibling?), and each other and someone else to look out for. And they know how the world works and how to survive it. And so I came to the conclusion that although it wasn’t a good ending, or a happy ending, or the ending I wanted for them, it was a just Good Enough ending. Just like the Baudelaires are just Noble Enough. And that’s all I could want, because it’s more than I had any right to expect, all things considered. What that means for me, remains to be seen. Like theirs, my story goes on.
So, Violet, Klaus, and Sunny, we come to a Very Fond Departure. You three have all left a permanent mark on me, like a handprint on my heart, or an eye tattoo on my ankle.
The World is Quiet Here
*UPDATE*
I JUST LEARNED ABOUT THE BEATRICE LETTERS AND IT’S NOW ON ITS WAY TO ME THROUGH THE LIBRARY
*UPDATE THE SECOND*
Came home from work today via the library. I walked in the door holding all four All the Wrong Questions books, aND I GOT FIGURATIVELY JUMPED BY MY (younger, but much bigger) BROTHERS WHO TEAMED UP AND PROCEEDED TO LITERALLY WRESTLE ME TO THE GROUND AND PRY THE FIRST TWO BOOKS OUT OF MY ARMS “FOR MY OWN GOOD” AND “YOU WANNA START CRYING AGAIN, THAT’S HOW YOU START CRYING AGAIN”.
Now they’ve hidden the first two books and won’t tell me where they are, because if I don’t have the first two, I can’t read the others. Tonight when they’re both gone to class, some villainous behavior is going to take place until I find them. Violet Baudelaire isn’t the only one who can go through someone’s private property until she finds what she needs.
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