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#they all sound like tango
mrgatotortuga · 7 months
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HUGH LAURIE HAS SONGS???????
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loaflovesdoodling · 10 months
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"Why I can't see
that I am the me
that I was born into"
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radioves · 1 year
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its quite shrimple actually
#[Intro: Docm77] Listen Grian Nobody touches my bush You're done [Verse 1: Docm77] It all started when Grian touched my redstone He played#himself like a xylophone set on automatic Doc Monster is a savage‚ with technical skills And crazy vocal acrobatics I’m a legend of NHO‚#with Etho‚ Beef and Double O DocMC is coming for you sevenfold Got Rendog and other firemen To douse the flames that you shoot at this#To douse the flames that you shoot at this leviathan Iskall can try again [Verse 2: Wels & Xisuma] Yo You think i’m hiding‚ I’m just biding#my time Putting pen to paper‚ coming up with rhymes We’re the star-studded group that got together just to crush you Once we start something#you know we're gonna see it through I'm the knight‚ the soldier who brings the fight at first light Y'all had to incite‚ so now I gotta#indict You're guilty of getting murdered with words Y'all are out-gunned‚ go home nerds Wohoo [Chorus: All] Hermit Gang Hermit Gang Hermit#Gang‚ Hermit Gang Hermit Gang‚ Hermit Gang Hermit Gang‚ Hermit Gang Hermit Gang‚ Hermit Gang Hermit Gang‚ Hermit Gang Hermit Gang Hermit#Gang Hermit Gang‚ Hermit Gang [Verse 3: False & Xisuma] If you think you can stop the symmetry‚ that's false G Team is dialing for help‚#but I'm ignoring their calls And when their bodies dissolve‚ you’ll know that False’s on a killing spree Try to stop my pvp and perish#painfully I'm the queen of hearts‚ heads and body parts Your diamond armor can’t compare to my martial arts I'll send a poison dart‚ to make#you breathe your final breath G Team's name will be the only thing left Yeah [Verse 4: Impulse] Caffeinated‚ animated‚ redstone innovator My#behavior's crazy‚ can’t phase me‚ impulse is never lazy (Uh) Tango‚ why would you betray me‚ now my scope is aiming (What) Without a sound‚#without no hesitation‚ my creations are amazing Better watch your step or the G Team will end up blazing Who's the better team? There is no#controversy But before it's said and done you'll be begging us for mercy (All-right) [Chorus: All] Hermit Gang‚ Hermit Gang Hermit Gang‚#Hermit Gang Hermit Gang‚ Hermit Gang Hermit Gang‚ Hermit Gang Hermit Gang‚ Hermit Gang Hermit Gang‚ Hermit Gang Hermit Gang‚ Hermit Gang#Hermit Gang‚ Hermit Gang [Verse 5: Xisuma] X gone give it to ya‚ I'm gone give it to ya X gone give it to ya‚ WHAT Lyrical boxing‚ dropping#blows on all my foes And the G Team they're looking unclean needing some sunscreen Getting burnt by words to hurt this herd of nerds It’s#absurd how my rhymes got them injured Danger‚ danger I got lasers to cut 'em up like razors It's flexin' season and I got flavor Their#Their weak defenses like trenches and fences That these dense heads are presenting [Bridge: Xisuma & Docm77] They're presenting them alright#they're not very good I could walk over that‚ I could jump over that I could use an ender pearl I could use my elytra Come on G Team‚ jeeze#Yo‚ I don't know what to say Um‚ let me think [Chorus: All] Hermit Gang‚ Hermit Gang Hermit Gang‚ Hermit Gang Hermit Gang‚ Hermit Gang#Hermit Gang‚ Hermit Gang Hermit Gang‚ Hermit Gang Hermit Gang‚ Hermit Gang Hermit Gang‚ Hermit Gang Hermit Gang‚ Hermit Gang [Verse 6:#Rendog] Now I'm back‚ got some things I wanna say (Yeah) Whats the letter that starts the alphabet‚ Ay Ladies gotta get in line‚ the#diggity's be on the way (Cliff) Cleo dont know who she freaking with (Ooh) All the signs say to notify her next of kin This diggity dog be#dropping bombs‚ nothing but hits (Ay) Spit that rhyme again (brrr)‚ 'cause the message is I can mumble rap and still be the best there is#(Woo-ah) [Chorus: All] Hermit Gang‚ Hermit Gang Hermit Gang‚ Hermit Gang Hermit Gang‚ Hermit Gang Hermit Gang‚ Hermit Gang Hermit Gang#Hermit Gang Hermit Gang‚ Hermit Gang Hermit Gang‚ Hermit Gang Hermit Gang‚ Hermit Gang [Outro: Mumbo] Oh you wanted me to do a verse? I’ll#I'll have to check with G Team- I mean uh‚ I'd have to‚ I'll have to check with my schedule And see if I can...see if I'm able to do that#sort of thing I'm a busy guy‚ got lots of ....things to do Yeah‚ I mean‚ I just don't know if its a good idea for me to be part of this song
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dying-acc-idk-man · 2 years
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I REALIZE NOW WHOS THAT FICTIONAL CHARACTERS VOICE THATS FAMILIAR TO TANGO
ITS FUCKING PIZZA STEVE HELP
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ashiyn · 7 months
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actually getting a headache trying to read joes post so im gonna go back to sleeping now and try again in a few hours
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scribbling-dragon · 2 years
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i am in SHAMBLES about ranchduo they were just so easily loveable. and at the end im being told to go, to go home, because, you're still here?
i dont think im going to be normal about them for a long time
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rosaacicularis · 1 year
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which was more culturally significant, the renaissance or hermitgang
#it all started when grian touched my redstone he played himself like a xylophone set on automatic doc monster is a savage with technical#skills and crazy vocal acrobatics i’m a legend of the nho with etho beef and double o docmc is coming for you seven fold i got rendog and#other firemen to douce the flames that you shoot at this leviathan iskall can try again you think i’m in hiding i’m just biding my time#putting pen to paper coming up with rhymes were the star studded group got together just to crush you once we start something you know were#going to see it through i’m the knight the soldier who brings the fight at first light y’all had to incite so now i gotta indict you’re#guilty of getting murdered with words y’all are outgunned go home nerds hermitgangx16 if you think you can stop the symmetry that’s false#gteam is dialling for help but i’m in ignoring their calls and when their bodies dissolve you know that false’s on a killing spree try to#stop my pvp and perish painfully i’m the queen of hearts heads and body parts your diamond armour can’t compare to my martial arts i’ll#send a poison dart to make you breath your final breath gteams name will be the only thing left caffeinated animated redstone innovator my#behaviour’s crazy can’t phase me impulse is never lazy tango why would you betray now my scope is aiming better run from cover from all the#ghast balls that i be taming without a sound without no hesitation my creations are amazing better watch your step or the gteam will end up#blazing whos the better team there is no controversy but before it’s said and done y’all be begging us for mercy hermitgangx16 x gone give#it to ya i’m gone give it to ya x gone give it to ya what lyrical boxing dropping blows on all my foes and the gteam they’re looking#unclean needing some sunscreen burnt by words this herd of nerds it’s ubsurd how my rhymes got them injured danger danger i got lasers to#cut them up like razors it’s flexing season and i got flavour their weak defenses like trenches and fences that these dense heads are#presenting they’re presenting them alright they’re not very good i could walk over them i could jump over them i could use an ender pearl i#could use my elytra come one gteam geez hermitgangx16 now i’m back and i got some things i wanna say what’s the letter that starts the#alphabet a ladies get it line the diggity be on the way cleo don’t know who she freaking with all the signs say to notify her next of kin#this digitty dog be dropping bombs nothing but hits spit that line again brrr cause the message is i could mumble rap and still be the best#there is hermitgangx16 oh you wanted me to do a verse i’ll have to check with gteam i mean i’ll have to check my schedule to see if i can#see if i’m able to do that sort of thing busy guy lots of things to do oh do averse bananas do a verse bananas i just don’t know if it’s a#good idea for me to a part of this song really#i just typed all of that out from memory im a little bit insane i think
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vilwil-brr · 2 years
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Pirate Xisuma I’ve only known you for a minute but you have me in a chokehold
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gayness-and-mayhem · 1 year
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Sarah Lancashire has awakened...feelings.
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bluesdeluxe · 6 months
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r*ssian grand prix is in my hometown soooo im here... it all makes me crave attending an international competition more x-x
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chungledown-bimothy · 5 months
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I cannot overstate how much I love Tom Lehrer's story. It sounds so fake but is entirely real.
He's a goddamn genius- he started studying mathematics at Harvard when he was 15 and graduated magna cum laude. He worked at Los Alamos for a few years before being drafted and working for the NSA, where he claims to have invented jello shots to get around alcohol bans.
He then went back to Harvard for a couple years before starting to teach political science at MIT.
Through all of that, he was writing and performing both some of the funniest shit you'll ever hear (Poisoning Pigeons in the Park, Masochism Tango) and absolutely scathing political satire (Who's Next, Wernher von Braun, Send the Marines). Until the mid/late 60s counterculture gained momentum. He didn't like their aesthetic, so he stopped making music.
Shortly after, he moved to California and started teaching math and musical theater history at UC Santa Cruz for the next 30 years.
I don't know if non-Californians understand just how goddamn funny that is. It's where stoners and math (and now computer science) kids who couldn't get into Berkeley go. Leaving Harvard/MIT for UCSC is peak academic phoning it in. And by all accounts he had a blast.
Plus the whole putting all of his music in the public domain thing. That fucked.
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i love the silly ass names of the ravagers in the dungeon. you see "Etho was slain by Sir Fluffykins of the Dungeon" in chat and all you can say is ah. decked out claims another victim
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wandasaura · 1 month
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WHAT DID I SAY
summary — the four times you fucked up and called your doms by the wrong name
warning(s) — college au, fuck-buddy relationships, marijuana use, alcohol consumption, face slapping, spitting, biting, body writing, restraints, spreader bars, mentions of branding, semi nipple torture, hickies, shotgunning, choking, butt plugs, spanking, ass biting, pussy slapping, doggy style, strap-on usage, cum-filled strap, fingering, oral, overstimulation, edging, orgasm denial, degradation, praise, daddy kink, mommy kink, captain kink, sir kink, literal filth, men/minors dni
authors note — first little headcanon/oneshot for know my place! hope you enjoy my little college stoners who fuck like rabbits. can totally be read seperate from the au!
know my place
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♥️⊹ ˚ . 18+, men/minors dni ⁺ 𓈒 ꒰💌꒱ ♡ ・ mommy maximoff ✧
Maria – 
The wine is warm beside Maria’s bed. The bottle of Prosecco momentarily forgotten about as a symphony engages beneath the darkness of night and blankets. It’s not often that Maria pulls the blankets overtop of herself as she works to unravel the intricate knots and coils in your belly, but she’s chosen tonight to share the beauty of your body with only herself and the silicone toy secured around her hips. Your moans are muffled by her skin, teeth embedded into her shoulder as she rocks the strap-on into you harshly, the bulbous head dancing along your cervix with every third stroke. She’s practiced in this tango, an expert in knowing your body, but the wine has impacted your reception to her actions, and as she pulls the strap out of you almost completely only to thrust back into you quick and harsh, a name leaves your lips that isn’t her own. 
Maria has never been soft with you in moments of time where some part of her body is buried within yours. She’s rough, and assertive, and entirely domineering as she splits you open and gives you only as much pleasure as she’s willing. With Maria, you’re never in charge. The cards are held tightly in her ironclad grasp and you’ve learned better than to try and guess that she’s holding. The wine however, has severely impacted your judgment. You’ve engaged in this dance for months now; been left with the bruises and aches of her touch for days afterward, and yet you’re disoriented enough to cry out for Wanda as she drills your sopping cunt so perfectly. 
“Mommy!” The title slips off your lips before you can search for the correct term that’s filed away in a section of your brain labeled ‘Masha’. Maria has never been Mommy, in fact, she’s always turned her nose up at the title and joked that Wanda’s entirely too harsh to be called something so maternal, and she’s less than amused when the five letter name falls onto her shoulders as she works to unravel you completely. 
Her hips stutter to a stationary position, the silicone dildo fastened around her hips deep within your pleasure soaked core, but unmoving and unwilling to start again. There’s a moment of silence that passes between the both of you; Maria’s eyes are hard, slitted and dark as she stares down at you in a drunken haze, brain struggling to process what you’ve just let slip. Your eyes are wide, light and soft as you meet her stare and attempt to win her forgiveness without seeing the repercussions of your actions. You were a fool to call her Mommy, but you were an idiot to think she’d let it go so simply. 
The silence that had fallen over you ended abruptly, replaced by the echoing sound of a sharp slap meeting your cheek and bouncing through the air before you’d had a chance to process the pain at all. Your head snapped to the side, your unharmed cheek pressing against her pillowcases that smell somewhat of smoke and vanilla. Your eyes pinch closed, anticipating the next hit that will land against your heated skin, but it never comes. Maria’s hand tangled into your hair instead, pulling your head back until your neck is craned and the expanse of your sensitive skin is exposed enough for her teeth and tongue to mark. 
“What’s my fucking name?” Her hips snap into yours with each word that she mutters against your neck, sharp bites and sensitive stings encasing your body in a delectable buzz of pleasure and possessiveness. You’ll bear these marks for days to come, indentations of her teeth and patches of purple from her lips adorning your skin that can’t be easily hidden with makeup or your longest turtleneck. Everyone who looks at you will know that you’d found yourself beneath a warm body and had been helpless to their assault, but only you’ll know that it was Maria Hill who had been your intimate attacker. Each lovebite that she presses into your skin is a subtle claim. You’re not Wanda’s in this moment, you’re not Natasha or Carol’s either, you’re entirely Maria’s and she’s reminding you of such as her hips drive hard against your own and the silicone strap that’s coated in your arousal attempts to bruise your cervix in the most addictively painful way. Each strong thrust sends you reeling farther into bliss, but she’s waiting for an answer and you’re not getting anything more until she hears you call her the right name. In her opinion, she’s being entirely lenient with you, there are a plethora of ways she can go about reminding you who you belong to, and yet your wrists remain unbound and your breasts remain unmarked by the leather of her favorite flogger that’s just an arms distance away. “Whats my fucking name, slut? Or do I need to carve it into you? How pretty would you be with my name on your thigh; ruined for anyone else who even tries to get between these legs? My little slut forever.” 
A strangled moan falls into the air as Maria sinks her teeth into the skin of your neck just beneath your ear, and your hands that have remained at your sides throughout this entire exchange shoot up to scratch at her back, blood bubbling to the surface as you spare to ounce of lightness to your touch. She’s marked you, now she’ll bear your marks for days to come. “S-Sir!” 
Maria hums, satisfied with your answer, but unwilling to forgive you completely. Her hips continue to pound into you until she reaches her high, thighs quivering as she moans in pure delight until she’s too sensitive to continue on with her ministrations. The strap-on leaves your entrance quickly, your overstimulated and sensitive walls pleading for it to stay, but Maria’s done for the night, and she’s decided that you are too. She reaches for the abandoned glass of wine, taking a sip smugly as she straddles your hips, damp toy splayed across your naked belly as your chest heaves and you look up at her pleadingly. 
“You’ll get to cum when I don’t have to remind you who I am.”
Natasha –
Natasha’s hips continue to rock into you even as she leans forward and captures your lips between hers. The room is filled with a thin layer of smoke, the scents of weed and sex entangling together and yet it's somehow entirely Natasha as you lay beneath her, willing to take whatever she wants to give you. Your head is fuzzy, filled with only thoughts of her and the lightness that the bud had brought over your senses. Her body is warm as her naked chest presses against yours, already marked by her passionate kisses and bites that will linger for days to come in secret. Her pupils are blown wide, a combination of her lust and the joint she’s rolled skillfully. Her fingers are educated in the art of many things, but unraveling you is one of her most prized hobbies. Her lungs are filled with smoke from the last drag she’s taken, and as the seconds linger on with her lips still pressed firmly to yours, unmoving but eager to claim you intimately, she exhales into your open mouth and forces you to take the smoke that she fills it with. It burns as you inhale, slipping down your throat smoothly and filling your own lungs, but it’s pleasant and you greedily allow her to continue until all that remains is an empty kiss that was once filled with weed. The smoke trails out in wispy strands of white and gray, and they dance between your faces until the open space claims it and the visual is gone. 
When she pulls away, there’s a devilish smirk on her lips that even another drag can’t erase entirely. She raises the joint to her lips again, eyes fluttering closed as she sits back on her heels, the cum-filled strap she borrows from Carol still buried within your walls and yet agonizingly still as she lets her head fall back in contentment. The cloud of milky white smoke that settles around her is entirely erotic, almost a halo of intoxication above her head, but there’s hardly a second for you to admire how ethereal she looks in this state before she presses into you firmly and resumes her rocking. Her pace is punishing albeit shallow, the tip of the strap-on hitting your perfect spot so softly it feels like butterfly sings batting against your skin, but she’s ruthless with her speed and the quick motions of her hips are enough to have you gripping at the sheets and looping your legs around her waist to draw her in deeper. 
Natasha laughs smugly at the sight of you so fried and desperate. She raises the joint to your lips with one hand, encouraging you to take a hit before her other hand wraps loosely around your neck. She doesn’t apply any pressure as you take a long drag, eyes fluttering closed as you involuntarily shiver at the taste lingering on your tongue, but the presence of her grip is enough to have your hips bucking into hers. 
“F-fuck sir!” You cry out when she obliges with your silent request and begins to thrust deeper into your core, the head of the toy pounding right against your sensitive spot with practiced ease as your head falls back against the pillows and your lips release the joint. A cough falls off your lips as you moan around the smoke in your lungs, eyes becoming watery from the burning sting, but you have no time to recover from the hit before Natasha’s hand is tightening around your neck and her hips are setting into you faster and harder. 
Her lips purse as she collects spit on the tip of her tongue, letting it fall against your flush cheek before she smears it down your neck, fingers that are still holding the lit join trailing across the expanse of your sensitive and worked over skin. She’s playing with fire now, quite literally, smearing her spit across your chest until she finds a home at your pebbled nipple and pinches roughly, but you have no ounce of self-preservation in your body as you watch the lit joint fall closer and closer to the marked skin of your chest as she tightened her grip on your neck and leans cynically close to your face. Her eyes are dark, clouded with lust and intoxication. Her hips have set a punishing pace and each time she drives the head of the strap into your g-spot your vision goes white with pleasure. 
“That’s not my fucking name. Are you really that much of a slut that you’re thinking about Masha as I’m fucking you. We can get Masha if you’d like, I’m sure she’d love to watch as I fuck you into my mattress until the only words you know how to say are Daddy please. I’m sure she’d love to lay between these legs and watch my cum spill out of you before I push it right back in and plug you up. Fucking whore. Is Daddy fucking you too good? Is that little brain so overwhelmed with pleasure that you don’t even know who’s fucking you?” Natasha lightens her grip on your nipple, bringing the joint back up to her lips before she drops it into the ashtray on her bedside table and grips the dildo, throwing her head back as her thrusts become choppy. “I bet you’d let anyone fuck this cunt. All you want is to cum. Fuck!” She curses as she drops her body against yours, lips capturing yours in a bruising kiss as she squeezes the shaft tightly, cum spurting against your walls and marking them with a milky whiteness. “Cum with me. Fuck!” 
With her permission, the coil in your belly finally snaps, and you arch into her touch as she rides out her own orgasm, the cum slipping down your legs and coating your inner thighs and her sheets. “Fuck Daddy!” 
“Good girl. Scream my name. Let Masha hear how good I’m making you feel.” 
Wanda – 
When Wanda invited you over to fuck, you’d anticipated something quick. What you hadn’t expected, was for her to bind your wrists to her headboard and force your legs apart with her recently purchased spreader bar. You’d been at her mercy for hours now, writhing on the bed beneath her as she took her time working you up. First it had been her fingers that dared to ruin you, the ringed digits slipping between your folds and teasing your clit and entrance until you were dripping onto the bed sheets and pleading with her to give you something more. She’d agreed easily, not even putting up a fight to prove her dominance over you. Those skilled fingers had turned into a skilled tongue. The hot muscle pressed against your clit, lapped at your entrance and slurped up the damp arousal that glistened beneath the moonlight that bled into the room from the open window. She was relentless in her teasing, and as overstimulated as you were beneath her touch, you were equally as frustrated. She’d been at it for hours, bringing you just close enough to taste the sweet relief of your orgasm before she pulled away and began the process all over again. You’d cursed her out six times since she started, and each time she merely chuckled against your core and slapped her palm down harshly against your cunt, sure to let her fingers brush against your clit for merely a second before it was gone and her tongue soothed the ache but brought nothing more. 
Your hands itched to tangle into her hair, and yet each time you reached for her you remembered how she’d so intricately bound you to the headboard with the softest rope in her collection. Your hips bucked upward as she pulled away again, your entrance clenching around nothing as your clit throbbed and protested. A broken cry fell off your lips as you shook your head frantically, needing her back on you and relieving the intense ache that she had single handedly created. Her lips and chin glistened with your arousal as she smirked down at you, the vibrating egg between her legs working her up to an orgasm you could only beg for. 
A whine rippled through your chest before it tumbled into the room, the words you’d been chanting for hours mangled and wrong as they came spiraling out fast and strung together. “Captain! P-Please!” Wanda growled lowly at the slip, her eyes dark and sinister as she leaned forward to grab your jaw and force your eyes on her. 
“What did you call me?” Despite how she articulated every syllable in the sentence, she wasn’t really looking for you to respond to her. In a swift motion, she’d reached across the bed to grab the panties that she’d pulled from your legs when you’d first joined her in the bedroom, and shoved them into your mouth. The balled up fabric was damp and uncomfortable as it sat on your tongue, but despite how hard you strained to force them away from your mouth, you couldn’t get them out with your arms bound and her body restricting your movements. 
Your eyes tracked her movements as she fumbled around in the drawers of her bedside table, thighs straddling your waist as she leaned forward and subsequently rocked the vibrating egg farther into her tight channel. She trembled in pleasure, but everything about her was always so perfectly kept that it was hardly noticeable to anyone who wasn’t you. Her rustling had lasted mere seconds before a black marker that had been used weeks prior to mark up a project poster now in her grip and uncapped. You had no idea what she planned to do with it, but there wasn’t any way for you to ask if you wanted to. You were helpless to watch as she slid down your body and dragged the inky tip across the skin of your breasts before moving downward. 
You gasped when the cold tip of the marker dragged across the skin right above your mound, thick black letters that you had to strain your neck to read lingering on your skin only to be gone when you washed your body of her touch later that night. ‘Mommy’s Slut’, was written just above your cunt, but Wanda wasn’t satisfied in stopping there. She dragged the felt tip across the inside of your thigh, holding your legs still as they wiggled away from the ticklish sensations she provoked. A thick arrow pointed straight at your weeping entrance, and Wanda was cruel enough to write, ‘cum slut’ at the tip of the arrow. A cry fell off your lips when she threw the marker onto the floor, and returned to her position between your legs. Her mouth was cruel as it worked you up to the edge, but unlike the times prior, she hadn’t stopped when you’d begun to wriggle around as an indication of your approaching orgasm. You fell over the cliffside in bliss, but that had only lasted long enough for your orgasm to crash over you and then she was gone, forcing you to ride it out with no further stimulation. 
A harsh slap met your sensitive cunt when you finally stilled on her bed, teary eyed and desperate for something more as you stared up at her with wide pleading eyes. Wanda wasn’t willing to comply however, and instead of satisfying you fully, she trailed harsh bites up your torso and between the valley of your breasts before her lips, still glistening with your arousal, found a home against yours. The dainty pink panties with a frail little bow on the waistband still between your teeth and properly wet from your saliva, but she hadn’t trailed so close to your face to kiss you. Instead, she settled her harsh glare on you, a sinister smile curling the edges of her lips upward as she let a damp finger stroke across your cheekbones, “I guess Mommy has to remind you of who you belong to. We’ll see if you deserve to cum in a few days.” 
Carol –
The buttplug is an added sensation that Carol uses to her advantage as she works to unravel you completely before you both have to leave for class. You’re not new to butt plugs, Maria’s quite the fan of them, but you’re new to them with Carol and the ways that she likes to toy with your stimulated body. You're on all fours in the center of her bed, knees sinking into the mattress as your hands grasp and twist at the comforter, absolutely desperate for relief that’s been slowly building beneath the surface. Her fingers are buried deep into your core, curling into your g-spot and massaging your velvet walls with pride. Her tongue circles the plug in your ass teasingly, and every couple of minutes when you least expect it, she presses against the base of the plug in tandem with her harsher thrusts before she scissors you open. 
Carol smirks against your ass as she sinks her teeth into your left cheek, her hand slapping down on you right just as she flicks her thumb over your clit. A muffled moan falls off of your lips as you bury your face into the comforter, your hips rocking back on their own accord as you attempt to chase after her touch, a strangled cry of, “Daddy more!”, vibrating your cheek as you twist your head to rest your cheek against the comforter and stare back at her. 
Carol is relatively unbothered by your slip of her title, but she doesn’t let it go entirely, not that you’re aware yet. Her fingers work into you easily, her thumb rubbing harsher, tighter circles around your clit until you're spasming on the bed. She smirks against the globe of your ass, her thumb pressing firmly against the plug with the hand that’s not buried between your thighs. “That’s not my name Princess and you know that.” Carol says smugly, grinding her hips down onto the edge of the bed as she chases her own relief, knowing there’s not enough time in the ten minutes she has left with you to reverse your position and have you go down on her. 
“Captain!” You cry out sharply, reaching your hand back to grasp onto Carol’s as the coil builds in your belly almost unbearably. The engineering major merely smirks, digging her teeth into your ass a final time before she encourages you to spill around her fingers. That’s all it takes for you to cave and tremble as she continues to scissor you open and curl her fingers into your cunt, but as quickly as your orgasm comes, she’s pulling away and throwing your clothes at your head. “You’re really going to go to class like that?” You question her, laying dazing on her bed as you twist onto your back and watch her run a baby wipe between her legs before she’s wiggling into a pair of fresh panties and reaching for her pants. 
“Yes, and so are you. Get up. That plug doesn’t come out until I take it out.” She says in the most unphased tone, reaching for the crewneck that’s been laying across her desk chair for days, not even bothering to reach for the bra that’s only inches away. 
“W-What?” Your eyes go wide as you sit up in bed, wincing slightly at the pressure in your ass as the plug presses against the inner parts of you sweetly, ropes of pleasure shooting through your core. 
“You didn’t think I’d let you off that easily, did you, Princess?” Carol merely winks before she’s flying out of the room, shouting that you have three minutes to meet her in the car before she leaves without you and makes you walk to class.
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writing-fanics · 3 months
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don’t mess with the devil ii
Part I final
Chapter ii: Home is with you
[warning: mentions of sex]
Lucifer Morningstar x human!Reader
Y/n
Y/n?
Sweetie?
The smell of chemicals wafted through your nose, and the occasional beeps that sounded like a heartbeat monitor? You groaned, and your vision still blurry. “L-Lu?..” Your voice hoarse, but the voice didn’t respond.
“It’s me mom.” The voice said, causing you to sit up quickly in response. “Whoa, slow down.” Your mother, said placing a hand on your back. “I-I’m back..” You whispered, and your mother looked at you worriedly. She gently rubbed your hand, “Yes you’re. Thank Heavens.” She said, planting a kiss on the side of your head.
You sat there and said nothing, staring blankly at the blanket. Processing everything, you were no longer in Hell. No longer with Lucifer. You were back home on Earth with your mother. Like you always wanted right? Then why did you feel so cold? So empty?
You felt as if a piece of you was missing. Like you were missing your other half. Your Lucifer. You missed his warmth, his smile, and his goofy personality at times. He always found a way to make you smile whenever you were feeling down, and you would return that sentiment.
You didn’t tell him you loved him yet, he’s told you. But he respected that you might not be ready to saw it yet. He understood completely, once you explained it to him. Having told him about your bad relationships in the past. Now, that all seemed to end right now. You were never going to see him again.
“Y/n, oh sweetie you look pale.” Your mother said, snapping you out of your thoughts. As she placed her hand on your forehead. “I’ll be right back.” She said, and you assumed she left to get the doctor. You frowned, as you laid back down in the hospital bed. The hospital gown fabric scratchy, and the sound of the heart monitor made you sick.
You laid on your side, back towards the door. Your stomach grumbled, but you didn’t feel like eating anything. Laying in the single bed made you, the king sized bed you shared with the king of hell.
The satin sheets and the comfortable bed. Mainly you missed, laying in bed with him cuddling or just laying there to relax. Or of course doing the ol devils tango. You missed the smell of the caramel apple candle that filled the bedroom. The smell of freshly baked apple by on Saturday mornings.
Tears trickled down your cheeks, as you hid your head into your pillow. As much as you were happy to be back home, seeing your mom again. Somehow, what was once home no longer felt like it.
You opened your closed hand to reveal, a golden ring with wing like textures engraved into it. Tears welled up in your eyes, as you were filled with so much regret.
“I should’ve told him..” you sniffled, as you closed your hand again. Hiding your face into your pillow once again. “How much I love him.” You whimpered, as you sobbed.
back in hell
Weeks later
Lucifer sighed, as he leaned forward onto his desk. His eyes wandered towards the framed picture on his desk, of you and him at Lu Lu World. “This is way better than Disney!” He remembered you said, after which you showed him pictures. He knew of another park called ‘Hellsney’.
You had faded away from his hands, and a part of him knew you were going back to the living world. He felt it when part of his magic he shared with you, returned to him. He didn’t even get to say goodbye, tell you how much he loved you before you faded away in his arms.
At least, he knew you were much sadder up there than here. He couldn’t bear the site of your beaten and battered body. Adam was lucky that Charlie was there to keep him, from killing him.
Lucifer stared down at Adam, as he held Charlie in his arms. His voice distorted and demonic. “You come at me my daughter and my partner!” said Lucifer, as his daughter stepped down onto the ground.
He lunged towards Adam, and stood over him. Eyes red glowing filled with rage, “Don’t forget your in my house now bitch!” He laughed, demonically as he threw punch after punch. With the intent to kill. You don’t mess with the devil or his family.
He’s going to miss that smile of yours, that infectious laughter. Your voice, and your delicious cooking that rivaled his. He never thought he’d find love again after, Lilith left. Yet, here you come in six years later. A human no doubt ending up in hell so suddenly, and he fell in love with you.
Now, you left too. Not by choice but you were gone as well. He was still recovering from Lilith leaving him while the two of you, were still in a relationship. You told him that you understood, being together for as long as they did you understood.
You being there with him helped seemed to heal that wound. Then fixing his relationship with his daughter helped too. But now that wound in his heart, seemed to open back up. Hells, he loved you god so fucking much. You were special there was something about you, maybe the two of you were soulmates.
A silly thing to think but it could be possible?
He reached towards the photo, and stared at it longingly. You had a goofy smile on your face.
He remembered that day, after that photo was taken. A hellbird flew down, and stole his caramel apple. You gave yours to him, and the two of you shared it.
God he was going to miss you..
“Come on.” A distorted voice said, he turned around in his chair. “Who’s there?!” He called out, but saw nothing. Was it all in his head. He could’ve sworn that voice sounded familiar.
“Lu!” A voice called out, a faint yellow glow as if a portal trying to manifest itself appeared behind him. He didn’t notice a hand reaching out to touch him, through the tiny hole.
He thought it must’ve been that Alastor, pulling some sick twisted prank on him. But he could’ve sworn, he felt a little bit of his magic leave him.. That could only mean..
Taglist: @96jnie
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laddertek · 2 months
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new family lore. step-dad tango (hazes son?)
Scar: I thought we would find it. How have we not found them? Tango: When was the last time you saw them? I hate to sound like a dad or whatever but retrace your steps. Where did you have them last? Scar: Ok, all right, all right, all right. All right. Come over here, dads. So, over on this side right here, I had pillars... Tango whispers to Etho: I have them =)
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pporapipam · 2 years
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hold on. world stop. billlie have instrumental albums alongside their other releases?!? ok i’m sold now THIS is how you get me.
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