#theyre just little guys hangin out up there

[sammyloomis]

i love making up little stories in my head of my favourite characters from vastly different franchises falling through portals into each others worlds and meeting like this is a crossover episode on cartoon network

[iliveforyouilongforyouvesuvia]

yippie!!

ok so one day i was hangin out and thinking about how jinx and murie are both my favourite little sad wet guys in my two fave medias of all ever *And* at the same time SO far apart on the spectrum personalitywise

and it took me listening to this to flip the switch on the Autism Blender and want to just fucking mash them together like a coked up toddler making Slime out of fish guts and hayao miyazakis mothers ashes because thats what i do thats my job💅👌so theeeen it comes out pretty reminiscent of my first muriel au that also sprung up from a song i like, just- a bit to the left? like, moving along on the scale from The OG not liking violence and being involved in it whatsoever, to AU 1 where i pictured him going "yeah ok fuck it this is what i do i guess" and revengy motives to his whole thing that i now connected with him more thru the song lmao it just made me realize the vision of like. jinxies "murderingmurderinmurdering 💕fun✨" aspect + his potential desire to still do good things despite being doomed to be a machine made for destruction (ignore the fact of that desire being nonexistent in his canon form because of how he perceives himself as a thing unable to achieve performing any good ever under any circumstance) (but still refusing to actively cause harm as he isolates himself to prevent any situations arising that would lead him to do so) (ignore all that) (were yassifying him a little were allowed its fine ive already lost the plot here anyway were wildin) so a vigilanty type beat and also ~my axe is my buddy🥰 we both cry with the trees😔✊ /me & my axe will bring the devil to his knees (✿◕‿◕ )~ goes hard as phUCK

so then all that led to This new V.3 mutation where hed be actually having fun with it........ so I kinda start turning him over in my brain some more, forgetting about jink by now and at first I go Huh this is kinda. him but lucioey a lil bit. and THEN i go hm. Well this ground is awful soft n ready to dig

so with all that out of the way i can now present!: Brand New Vague Shadow of a Concept of an Idea that ill Never Do Anything with

and I really don’t know how to verbalize this very well at all mmjfdh but like. Ok bulletpoints activate

Muriel:

From a badass warrior tribe

Didn’t get booted out cuz theyre fine this time oopsie no genocide

Hes in there way chillin way awesome way good at fighting everybody loves him

Hes like. Way himboey in this one. SO jock. Smiles a lot <3 <3 <3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3

Like okay if i was actually serious about writing this I think id need a fucking lucio consultant because I really know zilch about that bitch but like okay you know how lucios kinda all scary n cunty and cunning and fancy and seems like hes got shit figured out. Until he *starts talking*? Muriel here is like that but hes just really fucking scary until he starts talking BUT not like normally where hes adorable just has resting bitch face, its just like. that part of him that came thru in the reversed ending at the very end, yknow. but make it less depressing ihjhsrfbjs hes like full letterman jacket highschool bully core total kurt & ram vibe, like ok youd see him on a battlefield ABsolutely WRECKIng some fools into a pulp with his bare bear hands and immediately after that he turns around like WOOOOOOO THAT’S what im TALKIN ABOUT LETS GO GUYS WHO WANTS A BEER *cut to him chugging an entire keg over his head with da boys around losing their minds* like think college frat but they raid villages for fun and profit. Pretty orc coded. Kinda thor coded. Actually exactly thorcoded wow that really is what I was going for. I was wondering why I couldn’t help imagining him with a australian accent, I guess that’s a mystery solved. anyway

Maybe his parents got killed in some other battle im not sure how to weave around that in detail yet BUT- ok so check this I thought ill have to give him some motive to wanna reach the devil somehow for,,.,,… something right. to make him fill an antagonist role So this might be stupid a lil I just thought of this and it needs to cook for sure but what if he just rolled up into vesuvia as the magic capital or something whtver, to figure out how to get to talk to the devil, cuz he just like, really wants his parents back cuz they got valhallad in some glorious combat, and they were cool and he misses them and they could fight some more cool fights together and pillage n chill jhbsfvjgzdc beCAUsE hear me out im rolling with the swap inversions opposites motive here right, so the thing that popped up in my head was- Lucio had the “I wanna kill my parents bcause I hate them and so I can rule and get what I want” thing goin at the start right, like that is basically what started it off he got his dad he didnt get morgha SO what IF I gave murie a “i wanna conquer this place and use it to get my parents back. cuz I missem :(” like fully turned it around idk IDK IT SEEMS MESSY IDK IS IT CUTE IS IT DUMB IT MAKES ME FEEL DUMB BUT IN THAT WAY THAT MIGHT MEAN THAT ITS ACTUALLY WORKING BUT I DONT KNOW *screaming with no air*

But overall yeah hes khal drogo but more noticeably himboey but not in a likeable way cuz were switching them so I cant make him likeable for myself hnjdgfgb leaning into popular dumb jock trope

UnLESSSS i DID combo it with murdermuriel au 1.0 some more and made their tribe like. Not murdery somehow like what would be the opposite of the og scourge roaming around ruining shit. well that was the og kokhuri but now I gotta do some fucking triple axels here to make it make sense so how the fuck do I make this version of kokhuri more warriory in culture than the original but still nice like robinhoody style jhbfsvhjbs this is falling tf apart might need to scrap it bc on lucios end itd be even harder wouldn’t it. Spartan cunts but they don’t kill people that’s a nono lmao

now im thinking some more about the aspect of lucio being, you know. a pretty shitty leader right, and how to incorporate that here, because i have no idea if im following an actual set rule here regarding whats swapped and how even, theres barely a theme im straight up just

but yeah so now i figure it could be murie tryna get his folks back because they were the actual defacto leaders of their tribe, he was just kinda still following along and doin his chores in being the uhh the face, the charisma, the one to kinda like. get the people on board easier with whatever decision they made for them and hyping it up as the best possible choice anyone could ever make and maybe even actually believing it too cuz theyre actually that tightknit and he trusts them with anything aw. is this too onedimensional or can i give my boy some good nice facking family relations at least in an alternate life ghhkjkfdh hes their pride n joy and can do no wrong but yeah the point is he himself hasnt actually made any decisions without them before, isnt very good at actually leading and strategizing and planning and knowing how everything complicated works and he knows it, so he sees his only solution in bringing them back to not let everything fall apart

SEE I BROUGHT IT AROUND I CLEANED UP NICE WITH OG LUCIO SETTING OFF FROM THE POINT OF FEELING LIKE HES THE BEST AT EVERYTHING AND SHOULD B RECOGNIZED AS SUCH AND TRYING TO GET RID OF HIS PARENTS TO GET IT AND MY BOY HERE ENDING UP EXACTLY OPPOSITE. GO SHAWTY GO SHAWTY IM SO SMART am i fucking up lulus backstory i feel like i am cuz im like wait what the fuck did he kill his dad for again. demonheart. deal. thing. whatd he wish. like he wasnt already running for count n shit yet he did want to climb up the ladder in his own tribe right i have no idea yell at me in comments thank you

I also don’t know if the first (last) scourge battle wouldve happened or nah

Lucio/Montag

Oh my fucking god what if I figured out an alternative L moniker for murie so theyd get to switch letters in their namesssssssss like lucio is a made up name he made it up so like UAGHASHG L.,,,...,, Lion ofthe,... south NO he HAS to be bEAR CODED AAFYFFHG BUT LUCIO HAD LEOPARD IMAGERY N SHIT RAAHAHHGH IM FITIN FOR MY LIFE HERE

Anyway he lives in a forest somewhere cuz his tribe threw him out fully voluntarily bc he sucks ass (or at least for their standards cuz I guess he would be way younger than 18 here for this) (Like a spartan type deal ur too weak we don’t want you *drops you off a cliff*  *but theres 4 feet of snow under it so he survives*  *that’s so fucking goofy hjbsfbj kinda suits him*) so uhhhhhh i don’t know where hed be currently chilling for an mc to meet him ever but yeah hes kinda Floki Vikings™ type of vibe at least visually that’s what came to mind first to picture him lol

look at this little blond rat bastard. adorable. becoming increasingly obsessed. picturing lucio with this exact hairline. moving on

and his thing is hes still insecure as fuck but worse at ignoring it and hiding it and hes a lil nervous bundle of sticks and always talking bc of it, kinda Bruno Madrigalesque type vibe julian but a pitch more pathetic who knew it could be done yknow? opposite of The OG The Mountain The Stone Cold Silent The Muriel The Scourge The Kokhuri The Third and also me when writing and not stopped in time

oh oh what if he was totes in denial that his tribe kicked him out and in his view hes on some super intense convoluted secret mission (lasting from. age 7 to now apparently) and as soon as hes done they’ll totally come back for him kdfsgjffd I thought it could either be his own copium or he took it from some last interaction with someone who took pity on him as a kid and wanted to give him some comfort, or something he misunderstood entirely

hm. They both have canid familiars idk what to do with that. muriel with two wolves tho. thats hot shit righ there if i do say so myself

oh now im toying with the idea of taking away muriels SUPPOSED YET UNCONFIRMED AS MY VERY CONTROLLED ACADEMIC STUDY HAS SHOWN COUGHCOUGHJHBSRGJBHF talking to animals buff, i dont wanna just take it and give it to lucio tho, but like. what the fuck else do i give him. astral projecting to tie into his ghost era? sounds dope actually alright lets do that lmao

ok its 1 30 am i hope this is comprehensible to anybody anywhere im zonking out now khbsfhbfk love u

@tetsuooooooooooo I've missed your essays, this was such a treat to log in to!!!

And WOW, thorcoded Muriel is not something I ever would have thought of on my own but oddly enough I feel like the AU you're coming up with could really work, goodness me. And the way you've inverted Lucio's character too!! I'd love to see how their interaction dynamics invert as well!

Always good to hear from you friend, hope you're doing well!

[bcofl0ve]

Hi! 😊 I'm the person doing your surprise for the HBO War Summer Exchange. I know your fic blog is shadowbanned so I didn't know where to send this ask, but first of all, I hope your day is going well! 💕 Second, here's a question for the young vets AU: is there anything that John and Gale hide from each other and think the other doesn’t know, while in reality, the other knows perfectly well? Could be negative or positive.

hi friend! im out of shadow ban jail now but will answer this on here to make sure you see it (and reblog on the fic blog just in case) putting below the cut since i do not try not to post fic stuff on here

gonna give you some negatives and some positives so you can play with what you want to :*

in positive land, i think gale is good at keeping surprises and bucky is horrible at it lmfao he can't keep a secret to save his life. less patience than gale, so it bleeds over to that type of thing too. but they're both military guys who are analytical thinkers and can guess pretty good.

if you want to go real angsty re: my stuff w/ bucky's drinking problems i think he doesn't want gale to worry, so he doesn't want him to know. does the whole putting alcohol in diff bottles thing, which gale does eventually figure out bc there's kinda only so long you can get away with that.

re: an angstier option for gale i think he's a lot more internal about his mental health struggles. but bucky knows him like the back of his hand and he doesn't mask it nearly as well as he thinks he does.

on a more positive note- the whole kids thing before they actually talk about it seriously. they know at a bare minimum that neither of them are anti children. but say theyre hangin out with a friend that has kids, bucky is on the floor w/ a little toddler and catches the way gale is looking at him and just *knows* what he's thinking. even if he real quick looks away when he realizes he's been caught. same thing vs versa.

i hope this was helpful, feel free to follow up! (and you can follow up on my fic blog now since im out of shadow ban jail)

[dateamonster]

longass monster high liveblog: season 2 edition lets gooooooo

rule school

very first thought of the new season: i want a doll of clawdeens wereruler armor so bad. also im excited for more worldbuilding lore stuff, and more varied werecreature designs! part of me gets a little irked sometimes that there seems to be disproportionate attention payed to werecreatures and the inner workings of their society over other monster species, but i cannot deny, i love a funny lil furry.

especially this side character bear dude who keeps showing up

rly feels like there should be a clause in were-society for what to do if ur wereruler is a fuckin kid. she should not have to be doing all this.

when she finally gets that armor off its gonna be like rock lee with the weights

i love these cunty old werewolf ladies ngl

damn speedreader clawdeen

that painting of foxford is soo cute clawdeen i loove u

toralei!! toralei HUG!!!!!!!! hug AND a pun!!! shes sososososo cute

oh and shes maaaad that she showed affection where other people can see lol the Dynamic.. it is unfolding before my very eyes..

oh damn the fox guy is a sneaky motherfucker? who could have foreseen this....... granted the whale plushie is unexpected

new witch in town

draculauras gay lil witch friend <333

lol is humans using monster slang a microaggression? much to think about.

im really interested in this developing plotline about draculaura being pressured to be like the model of Good Witchcraft. it works well with her established character and arc of like trying to live up to her fathers reputation and status in the monster world. poor girl never seems to be able to just fucking relax.

skelita! i love that shes trying out witchcraft, and the art-based magic is a fun angle too! i can totally see where this is going tho. drac is super serious about magic because theres all this pressure on her while skelita is just trying it out in a casual way so theyre at odds. its an interesting dilemma because i can def see both sides.

im really happy the writing seems like empathetic to both positions here. skelita deserves to try magic her way on her own terms, but its also totally understandable draculaura would feel protective over witchcraft when any misuse of it is ultimately going to reflect on her since she was the one working to legitimize it. respectability is a double edged sword fr!

play it again clawd

aw clawd is such a sweetiepie mamas boy. i def feel a little bad for him. imagine if ur little sister became the queen of ur entire society and ur just like. hangin out there.

oh were doing a groundhog day? im not a big timeloop plot person but ill try not to be too biased

this is also how me and my roommate act when theres a fly in the house

aw im rly glad they acknowledge that selena had like a whole life in beheme that she had to leave behind when she came home.. idk if theyre planning to actually do anything more substantial with that but yea when you think about its kinda fucked up! they probably had friends and stuff! clawd was *born* there! i get why theyd choose to stay here with their family and all even if they could easily go back, but like, its gotta be sad at times!

ok not bad as a timeloop ep goes. still not my fav but like clawds so cute and its so nice seeing him do stuff with his family <3

thats all for tonight i think! see u next time!!

[mojaves]

💋🌵🍴🍄🏹🎤🎮🏡🪐🗝️💈💔❤️‍🔥💞 + seb ^_^

💋 KISS MARK: What’s their signature look, if any? Do they have a gesture or piece of jewelry or something else that acts as a calling card for them?

always silver jewellery. Always. thats a lie sometimes it's rose gold if it's like. a super extra special occasion. big black boots. grey or black long sleeve shirts with the sleeves rolled up + a good chunk of the buttons undone. the boobs are saying hello.

🌵 CACTUS: What are some reasons someone might not like them? What are their personality flaws?

he can be a little too bitchy. thats the best way i can describe it. a little too overconfident and snarky, which really overshadows the rest of his personality. he can also very easily shut himself off from the world when getting too overwhelmed, which can be extremely difficult to deal with, even for those around him who love him very much. especially because of how stupidly stubborn he is to a very detrimental degree, to the point it has caused a lot of permanent damage to his health, his body, And his relationships. seb is a LOT to deal with, because of all of the baggage that he comes with, and it would understandably be just. entirely too much for someone to want to deal with.

🍴 FORK AND KNIFE: Do they have good manners? Were they taught to be that way, or are they just polite?

seb grew up with a very. strict father. to put it lightly. he HAD to have good manners, or he would otherwise be punished for it. even without that as an incentive, he's a generally very polite person anyway, always treating others with the respect he would expect to be treated with too. he can use it to his advantage when dealing with annoying clients or just. people who are dicks in general. where he can turn the politeness up to 11, into a passive aggressive manner. generally he will straight up just tell you to fuck off if you're annoying him. but if youre REALLY annoying him. he is going to make it worse for EVERYONE involved.

🍄 MUSHROOM: Would they ever experiment with psychedelics? How would it affect them?

he's insane he'll try just about anything. needs to find a balance though [which he often fails at. which makes things significantly worse for him] as he's a very tall guy. very large. so it would take quite a bit to kick in, but his brain and nervous system is extremely volatile and WILL go into overdrive if the experience is even slightly too much, which can make him go into his Passive Combat Mode. where the slightest movement could set him off. if he manages to get the balance just right though?? he's just hangin out. he's sludge. he's on the floor. don't worry about him.

🏹 BOW AND ARROW: What’s their preferred weapon, if anything?

KNIVES!!!!! theyre primarily what he trained with growing up, and theyre very versatile, perfect for both close and ranged combat. evey more fun if theyre dipped in poison. he sometimes crafts his own knives in his spare time, engraving very intricate and beautiful designs into them,,, and if he makes one for you?? well then you're basically the single most special person in the world to him.

🎤 MICROPHONE: What does their voice sound like? Do they have a notable accent? Can they sing, and if so, what would they sing at a karaoke night?

deep, a little rough and raspy, spanish accent with a hint of a night city twang in there, with a strong mechanical tone to it on account of his neck cyberware [which got even stronger when the voice module got damaged, which he never bothered to get fixed]. he can sing VERY well! it's something that's always been a passion and a talent of his, and he's always wanted to be in a band,,, at karaoke he would sing something either very soft, or something with a Lot of passion behind it, that you want to scream at the top of your lungs

🎮 VIDEO GAME: Do they play video games? What kind of games do they prefer?

sl/ime rancher. and m/inecraft. those are the only games he understands. the controls of every other video game will never make sense to him. even if theyre generally the same across the board. dont make him try to play anything else he'll get scared.

🏡 HOUSE WITH GARDEN: Where do they live? Do they have a house to themselves or do they live with somebody, or something else?

a small apartment in night city! where he lives with his husband and his cat [: it's a very cosy little place, just enough for all three of them, and he wouldnt change it for the world.

🪐 RINGED PLANET: How do they feel about space? Does it inspire them or make them feel lonely?

space has always been one of his special interests, and he will go on and on and ON about it given the opportunity. all of it stemmed from his little brother, luci, reading a book to him about planets one day, and ever since then it's something they've both had in common. he things it's beautiful, if not a little scary, but that just adds to the beauty,,, however he has been up there once. and he would very much like to never do that again. hasn't changed his love of the topic. but good lord.

🗝️ OLD KEY: What do they always keep in their pockets or purse?

his phone, a lighter, a pack of cigarettes, a couple of knives, small gun in case of emergencies, a wallet, and some fidget toys. the essentials for any man about town. he ALWAYS forgets his glasses though. the only way he'll remember is if he's wearing them before he leaves the house. but even that happens rarely.

💈 BARBER POLE: How particular are they about their hair? Do they prefer to do it themselves or get it done professionally, if they care at all?

he's not all too picky about it, and would let anyone cut it if he trusts them enough, and can otherwise just shave it all off and start again. his style is short sides and longer on the top. beyond that he's not really fussy about how it looks.

💔 BROKEN HEART: What would break their heart? What’s the worst thing a significant other or a close friend could do to them?

cheating. any sort of betrayal, really. but cheating is definitely the biggest thing that can send him spiralling. a lack of trust... he's been through that one too many times and if it happened to him one more time, he wouldn't make it to the next morning is all im saying.

❤️‍🔥 HEART ON FIRE: What really gets them going? What’s their favorite thing for a significant other to do?

hrgrhgfhhhfjhf he's a little freak. almost anything can get him in the zone if he's in a good mood. hugs? kisses? biting? even so much as just smiling in a certain way. listen. he loves his husband SO much. ok. that man can do literally anything and it's the single most attractive thing seb has EVER seen in his life.

💞 REVOLVING HEARTS: Do they have a best friend? What’s their relationship like?

he's got a few but for the sake of brevity. i'll talk about cassidy. his husband cassidy. YOUR OWN OC NO LESS!!!

it's a very loving and caring relationship, and VERY strong, thanks to all the things they have been through together. they're practically inseperable now. he trusts cassidy with his life, even more than he could ever trust himself. cassidy means the WORLD to him. there's so much i could say about their relationship but half of it would be me barking. you understand.

basically. no one has ever been so in love like seb is with cassidy. no one is doing it like them. and no one ever will!!!! im right

[drpeppertummy]

Pls never shut up about sunny share your rambles pls, he's a treasure I wanna eat some good food with him and just be friends ;;;

auauiuoou thankyou my bestest little guy,,,,,,,more random entirely-non-kink-related thoughts haphazardly cobbled together from discord messages (someday i will dig up some actual tummy-themed ones)

sometimes he watches a video on his phone without realizing his volumes up & scares himself. usually only happens at home or at his friends houses & if someones around to witness it theyre like Bro What The Fuck til they realize hes like dropping his phone trying to turn it off. hrs so embarrassed too hes like Im Not An Ipad Baby Im Not!!! hes like Im Not A Tiktok Baby!!!!!!!!! bc u KNOW lauries makin fun of him for it. shes like You Ipad Baby. You Tiktok Baby. I Bet You Watch Cocomelon Fortnite Compilations Loud As Hell At Applebees.

he loves sending his friends emails with URGENT!!!!!!!!!!! as the subject & itll just be some stupid shit but i think sometimes he'll do that & the email will just say "hi" . sometimes he'll do it when hes sitting like 10 feet from somebody & if they happen to be the kind of person who has notifications on & checks their emails right away theyll read it & he'll be sittin there like : - )

sometimes laurie will just pick sunny up & either shake him or squeeze him real hard or somethin of that nature & hes just fine with it. hes very light & malleable like aluminum foil

he Loves singin in the kitchen and the shower and the car and wherever etc. he sings preddy good which is a good thing bc he is Not shy about it hes putting his whole pussy into it doesnt matter if hes got the whole crew hangin around. i was pondering What sunnys singing voice sounds like bc his vocal range is Nuts & he can go high And low & i was thinking maybe he has kind of a billy joel vibe but not Quite. bc his natural speaking voice is a little on the higher side & billy joel is a smidge lower than how i imagine his natural singing voice sounding. i was like "hes somewhere between billy joel & frankie valli" & then i was like Wait Thats Just Uptown Girl. like he Can sing lower & higher if he wants to but thats like his Most Natural Singing Voice is somewhere around there. the higher end of the billy joel range

laurie loves stuffed animals i just Know sunnys trying to win her some big shitty bear at some shitty carnival game

he tries 2 be good with boundaries even tho theres def times when he freaks it. sometimes he overcompensates trying to make up for minor infractions. he likes being on good terms with people. hes one of those people whos like I Need Everyone To Like Me Or Else Ill Die. [but also he genuinely cares its not All him being self centered]. hes ascared of Being In Trouble and Being Bad [which could mean anything from making someone mildly displeased for a moment or completely & totally fucking up an entire relationship] #rsd. but then like he also cant help just totally bein a nuisance 100% of the time

tbh . i think Big Hug is his response to a lot of things. Hes A Hugger

he struggles with analog clocks he'll be trying to read one & hes like ✋Everyone Shut Up Im Focusing😤. i think left & right takes him a second too. sorry i love projecting

i think sunny says Go Piss Girl when laurie gets up to go to the bathroom & she smacks him in the head

any time hes trying to do something hes like running around in circles he always gets mixed up about what he needs to do first and what he needs to do next and where he needs to be headed and what hes supposed to be getting and hes just all over the place & hes straight up just spinning around trying to think. it takes him SO long to get started on something. once he gets going its fine as long as its a familiar task but it doesnt take much to break his focus. its like that sometimes when hes talking too. he gets sidetracked So easily sometimes it takes him like 10 tries to get a thought out before he finally manages to say what he wanted to say bc his brain keeps going on tangents & he starts rambling about other shit

he was the chattiest most outgoing little kid he would be like sittin with his mom at the dmv chattin up random nearby people he would be that kid at school who keeps sucking the sub into a conversation he wasnt shy around strangers At All but if he saw someone in like some big weird costume all of a sudden hes hiding behind moms leg. easter bunny? fuck no. mall santa? fuck no. smokey visits his school? fuck no. halloween? Good God What Is Going On Out There

ADDICTION TW - hes def the type whos gonna get addicted to something when he makes it big. & like he'll get off it before it kills him but theres no WAY hes making it through stardom without getting hooked on Somethin for a while. & he manages to hide it for a while but as soon as someone he cares about finds out he just starts Sobbing hes so ashamed. which is probably a turning point. getting out of it would probably also give him the push he needs to get actual mental health help

he may be wildly insecure about every last aspect of his personality but at least he has no doubt that hes cute. its like hes somehow never absorbed anything bad anyones ever said about short guys or big noses or hairy backs or what have you. He Knows Hes Cute its a simple fact of life

he tends to be interested in women more than men & i wonder if part of that is bc he feels less comfortable with his attraction to men bc hes been shamed for it. like he'll hook up with guys if they initiate it & he'll talk about Cute Guys but he doesnt tend to Seek Out those relations the way he does with The Ladies. part of it is simply that He Loves The Ladies but i think part of it is hes never allowed himself to fully embrace his bisexuality

sunnys the kinda guy to take a giant bite of somethin he Just took outta the oven & be like 🫢 Ih Hot ! hes like 🫢🫢🫢🫢H & lauries like Wow I Wonder How That Happened .

[bluiex]

*holds my shitty grian swap notes out shakingly*

i just meant to write a couple bullet points of key differences between the hc!grian+scar and dl!grian+scar but it is SO LONG

and its not even fully done i still need to think of a couple more things for hc!grian+scar but i think this is good enough for the moment

hc!grian:

personality:

- doesn't swear at ALL

- he also hasnt told scar he liked him but its more in a what if he doesnt like me back :(. kind of way instead of a oh fuck i murdered this dude he hates me way

- hc!scar is absolutely in love with him however so theres literally no reason theyre not together theyre just dumb

- less dumb then dl!scar and grian however

- hes a liddol guy

- knows way too much about hc!scar's face to be platonic

- will probably give dl!scar advice on how to deal with his other self

"dude you guys should just like communicate"

"says you, you and ur scar aren't even together"

"shut up ill work on that when i get back"

appearance:

- non-clipped wings, goggles, parrot wings

hc!scar:

personality:

- silly little guy

- he stays fully clothed most the time thank-you-very-much (to hcg's dismay)

- fully in love with grian, would literallly do anything for him if he asked nicely

- likes to go to hc!grian for resources he doesn't even need just to talk

- ALSO knows way too many details about hc!grian's face for a platonic relationship

- will also probably give dl!grian some advice, and so would dl!grian

appearance:

- s8 outfit even tho it doesnt match the timing of s8 and double life

- fuck u s8 solos

dl!scar:

personality:

- petty bitch

- love him for it tho

- willing to take his shirt off at any moment

- he desperately wants to make dlg happy and so tries and uses hcg as a substitute and gives him things to try and make himself feel better about not being enough for dlg (just fucking COMMUNICATE)

- he puts up a very happy front for dlg but instantly lets it fall when hes not around (everyone on double life is very confused at how dlg thinks scar doesnt care about big b)

appearance:

- regular red scar double life outfit

- extra scars, red eyes

- very dirty man, needs shower after being in 3 death games

dl!grian:

personality:

- swears like a sailor

- tired tm

- very much loves scar but is too much of a pussy to tell him so 'cheats' on him ( the whole secret soulmates thing is just him hangin out with big b but saying hes a secret soulmate to keep scar away)

- needs to fucking COMMUNICATE

- horrified of killing dls (will probably panic at watching hc!scar die)

- thinks dls doesnt even care about the big b thing so continues going to see him just to talk, big b continues on calling it secret soulmates just for funsies, dls DEFINITELY cares but dlg hasn't noticed

appearance:

- has eye patch + clipped wings

- also is just very dirty, needs himself a bird bath/j

- red eyes

- scars

dl!scar and dl!grian still share damage throughout this entire thing

so like dl!scar hurts himself in double life, dl!grian will feel it in hermitcraft

thats it for now, hope u enjoyed my ramblings, expect more - 🧨 anon

okay love that bit with them still taking dmg even across different universes, thats wild- bet they learn that the hard way

GIVE THE BOYS BATHS OML Love dl!Scar being a petty bitch- love him. BUT MY GOD TALK DL!G AND DLS (we love a misunderstanding in this household tho)

[lunanheartache]

this is babygar. young jgar & lamb.. theyve been adventuring for a little bit, known each other a smidge. theyre on watch on a job together and just hangin out. 1.9ish k

nature is loud. nightfall just means new music. sheltered in a small copse just off the road, j'gar sits with his back against a wagon wheel and admires the sound. crickets and cicadas and chatterbugs, each chirping their own recognizable chorus. it sounds like back home, like walking back from town with his family after one of any dozen of festivals with his heart warmer than summer, like staying up late nearly half out the window to read by moonlight. insects themselves don't live for long but the instinct does; there's that almost-butterfly feeling in his bones, a weird sort of comfort that these are the same sounds his momma heard growing up in the valley, same sounds her momma and every other iteration before him heard. he's looking at the same full moon and listening to the same bugsong as back in lunan, and that.

well, it's bittersweet tonight, but bittersweet don't mean not good. it's good. like a pink clay balm, it settles some itch that he knows has been growing under the skin for a while. if he closes his eyes, he can pretend he's out in the field with ruva while he talks about constellations and star stories.

but he's on a job, and ruva is not here. the stray fireflies that wander in, lost from the honeysuckle vines and windy fields, are familiar but new to him. the starlight through cracks in the canopy is unnameable.

j'gar takes a deep breath.

he scans the woods in front of him again. with the full moon drenching everything in thin silver, it isn't hard to see. finer details blur and jumble, but the core is still unmistakeable. the horses are quiet standing side by side, kept in a small makeshift corral. that's a good sign. no smell or sense to frighten them means nothing to worry about. nothing moves beyond leaves in the soft breeze, almost like blessing between the sticky heat of summer. the insect chatter drones unchanged. nothing to disturb it, nothing to break it to silence like a warning.

j'gar twists at the waist, one hip pressed to the dirt, and peeks under the cart. there's a thin shape leaning against it. "lamb, you see anythin'?" he whispers loudly.

"nothing but trees," lamb returns.

"nothin' over here neither. you know how much time we got left 'fore we can wake up what's-his-name?"

lamb's silhouette shifts a fraction. "a few hours," they say.

"damn."

j'gar turns back to his side with a half-hearted sigh. watch is boring. it's easy money at least, some rich guy - a wannabe politician what with his accent but lack of official guards - asking for hired help to make sure he travels safely through the boondocks. hardly feels like honest work, but the money from his last job is down to a few copper and that ain't enough for more than a day or two's room and board at any inn. he don't have to do nothing but stay up late and scan the horizon like a starving hawk, and by the time they reach the next town, his pockets will be plenty replenished. free travel, even.

still, there's something kinda funny. sitting crosslegged, j'gar props an elbow in the meat of his thigh and his cheek on his hand. this is the third job he's handled with lamb. fifth time they've run into each other. half of those, something went wrong. that job in munelle, playing hired hands to protect a shipment of wine until lamb asked a few pointed questions and the courrier flew off the handle (j'gar still isn't sure on the details there, too busy dodging to pay attention); vanerbrook was crooked from the start too, apparently, trying to find a missing mother and child when she had rushed out by the skin of her teeth and this man just weren't going to let her go easy; with ravet, it wasn't even the job but the inn, owners using a combination of magic and sleight of hand to rob folks blind in their sleep.

like lamb spells trouble. a bad omen, but a pretty one. if he were superstitious, he might be worried.

at least they're a familiar face. he'll take that. she says hi when she notices him, stops by his table if they're at the same bar. not quite a friend but not a stranger neither. another liminal space, personhood abandoned in the rush.

insectsong drones on as he stares blankly at a patch of dirt. he hums a vague tune to himself in response. the air smells warm and wet with summer, lifted up by leaflitter, fresh growth, and honeysuckle. too hot for a fire, it stays dark beyond fireflies and the full moon, and that's fine. it's enough to see by. he thinks about taking his shirt off to sleep, but he might just have to sweat.

"hey," comes a soft voice from behind him. something touches his hip.

j'gar startles without a sound, snaps away from the cart and pivots to face it in one smooth motion. his hand claps primed to the pommel of his axe, and.

it's lamb.

lamb, lying on his stomach in the shadowed dirt under the cart, looks at him with wide eyes. her hand stays in the air where it was, where it tapped him for attention. her eyes reflect starlight, color washed away to shiny silver.

the adrenaline collapses with him; j'gar drops the held position for a comfortable slump. "shit-hell, lamb, you scared the fuck outta me," he hisses quietly.

"sorry," lamb says, ears drooped sheepishly. "i didn't mean to. i thought we had talked so. um. sorry."

"s'fine, i just needa minute for my heart to settle. woof."

"want a cookie?" offers lamb hopefully.

"what, you got cookies under there? nevermind, don't needa ask me twice, i'm comin' in."

lamb shuffles back at an angle to make room, disappearing into the dark under the wagon. j'gar crawls forward and flattens to his stomach, squinting to see better; propped up on their elbows, lamb lies halfway under, a small cloth between their arms. it smells buttery, a little floral. distinct enough that it cuts through the wood, sweat, and dirt. he's not hungry but his stomach flips.

he pulls himself to mirror lamb. like this, they can both see out the other side, can still maintain some semblance of a watch.

not that j'gar pays much attention. nothing is going to happen. travel has been uneventful and bland thus far. his attention latches onto lamb eagerly. they're hard to see in the dark but j'gar knows them well enough he can fill in the blanks: messy brown hair, soft brown eyes cracked with amber, and the faintest hint of freckles. their eyes catch with the moon, harder to read but friendly nonetheless. the laced front of his shirt is casually, comfortably halfway undone.

he's not hard to look at. much more interesting than the trees.

j'gar smiles distractedly, half crooked. it widens when lamb returns it. "so what kinda cookies ya got?" he asks.

"lavender thyme shortbreads," lamb says.

"don't think i ever had one'a those," j'gar says, reaching out to take one. "not a chocolate chip fan? i do like a good oatmeal cookie. that's probably my favorite, really. back in lunan, everybody goes to the shed barn an' they make a real good fried sage blossom but i don' think they done nothin' with herb cookies like that. oh, they do gotta herb bread though, but tha's just okay."

"the chocolate at spinner's gorge wasn't exactly high quality. i usually like chocolate."

"just not spinner's chocolate," says j'gar. he cracks the cookie in half, florals light on his tongue. "oh, shit, this ain't bad. you got this in spinner? i guess i'on't really got money to be spendin' on pastries, really, so maybe all'a spinner's got good shit."

"no, i had plenty of bad pastries there," lamb says, nudging the cloth and its contents closer to him, "but these were decent. are you looking for jobs in kaszka?"

"i mean, i look for jobs everywhere. just seemed like there weren't much left in uwlbern. i figured might be time to try a big city, y'know? you know. you from up that way, or somethin'. not from any'a these backwoods villages."

lamb almost looks embarrassed, ducking their head and mumbling grass between their fingers. "you wouldn't be wrong. kaszka can be a lot, though. you know cities have pickpockets," he says.

"i got a good eye on me," j'gar says around a mouthful of cookie.

"how many scrapes have i pulled you out of?"

"that ain't fair," he complains, goodnatured. "none'a those jobs we been on were out there wavin' red flags. they was just borin' scutwork, an' iunno how you seen through what you seen through, lamby. better eye than me, for sure."

"you're too willing to take people at their word," lamb says, not unkindly. there's something almost wistful about it, curling wry at the edges. "people aren't as good as you want them to be."

"i mean, sure, but most folk only got their word an' if i don' take 'em for it, where's that leave me?"

"safer," says lamb, "usually."

j'gar grins and takes another cookie. "i been takin' you for your word, should i not be?" he teases.

"you've taken more than my word."

"lamby," j'gar says, playfully scandalized. his face warms, but it's dark and stupidly hot anyway. he swats at her shoulder. "you taken more than my word way more than me. gettin' cocky on me jus' 'cause i rolled over once?"

ducking their head, lamb laughs, quiet. there's a sleepy sort of fondness plain on their face like this, half-obscured in shadow. like between the dark and the hour, their guard's down and they're something more like a friend than a friendly stranger. a person, if only briefly.

j'gar's heart aches. he thinks about home. thinks about lunan, and everyone he left behind, and all the people he hasn't seen in a handful of years. thinks about all the people he has, and how he don't mean nothing to them beyond a tool, a solution, a quick fix to some problem they can't handle. no connection, no care. he's as nameless and faceless as anyone, meaningless and useful in the same breath, and lamb - and everyone - is in the same stupid boat.

it's funny in a sad sort of way. lying on his stomach under some rich fuck's carriage eating cookies and joking about one night stands with someone he barely knows, and that's what means something.

ah, well. he's lonely.

"shut up. which way you headed after we get to kaszka, tough guy?" j'gar says, poking lamb's arm.

lamb bats his hand away, sticking out her tongue. "haven't decided yet. i was just in kaszka recently. not much for me there," she says.

"whatcha goin' back for then?"

"there's a good- bread i miss," he says. his eyes flicker, hesitant. "nothing fancy. it's just- sweet."

j'gar gasps exaggeratedly. "you like somethin' not fancy? hon, you down here in the dirt eatin' lavender, what's so special about this bread an' where can i try it?"

lamb lets out a little self-conscious laugh, bowing their head to his shoulder. "how about you come with me when we get there?"

"it's a date, lamby."

[my-lunaberg]

I just finally finished watching the dream smp, here are my thoughts

Honestly, it wasnt that bad. Or atleast not as bad as some of the spoilers ive read wouldve lead me to believe. I think I wouldve had more negative feelings towards it if it wasnt for the spoilers lowering my standards but whatever, whats done is done and cant be undone or somwthing or like that.

I wanna try and make this a bit more organized, so I'll start with the Syndicate finale; I loved it, no notes. Everyone was great and it felt like an actual conclusion which is more than I can say for most of the other finales which is yknow, a bad sign for the series writing but whatever

Next the Dream, Tommy n Tubbo stuff; it was split into four parts and I didnt partcularly like the first three. The third one was especially bad it was just so weird and messy for the most part. I did really like the actual ending with all of them in this new world, hangin out, I think thats a bit of an unpopular opinion but I didnt have any issues with it. I thought it made sense for the whole cycles of violence theme of this big disc saga to end with the people involved breaking the cycle. I did prefer Tubbos pov of the last stream though, its probably my favorite part of the finale. Idk, I wasnt the biggest fan of Tommys characterization/dialogue, I didnt think he was ooc I just thought it was kinda boring and I really liked cc!Tubbos performance it was absolutely wonderful. Jack was great too, I love a guy whos just so cringefail. I really wish Tommy and Tubbo couldve had a little moment at the end in the new world as well, I know these kinds of post-ending stingers kind of have to be short to keep their impact but cmon, theyre bestiesssss give them a moment together

So yeah, in conclusion: it was okay i guess. I dont think I wouldve really cared if it was any better or worse because this a very character-driven story that doesnt really need an ending. Like, now that Im done with this bullshit I can just take these lovely characters and do whatever with them if that makes sense. It kinda reminds me of being 7 years old, going through my littlest pet shop phase but not having a lot of them and then my grandparents showed up to my birthday with a gigantic plastic tub that was almost as big as me full of lps and accessoires and houses for them, except with blorbos. So yeah Im off to fanart and AU land now, will not be rewatching this in the near future

[justcourttee]

could you do one where dami and mari are dating but they havent told the waynes yet and they keep seeing hints of their relationship (like clothes around the place, dami talking to on the phone and smiling, stuff like that) but they cant figure out whats happening!!!! the ice prince is softening and theyre like wtf!!!

I’m sorry, it’s a little different. I got carried away! I hope you still like it!

Tim is Like a Genius or Something..

It was official. Tim had lost it.

At least that was the sentiment the family shared as they watched him tumble down the rabbit hole that he had sprawled out across the dining room table.

“-and then he smiled at me. At me! That has never happened before, at least not a genuine one.” He paused to catch his breath, allowing his theory to sink in.

“Timmy, don’t you think you’re giving the boy too much credit?” Jason was the only one able to voice what they all were thinking, at least the one with the best chance of not getting their head torn off. “I mean, he has trouble communicating with his own gender and now you’re telling me he’s been able to woo his female lab partner?”

Tim slammed his hands on the table in frustration before sinking back into the chair he had started in. For weeks now he had been gathering evidence of his brother’s oddities and for weeks he had been haunted by a softer and friendlier Damian.

“Think about it guys, please!”

His pleads seemed to fall on deaf ears as one by one they left the table, each offering their own look of sympathy until he was the only one in the room. It wasn’t long until he himself had given up, collecting his pictures from the table, tearing them in half one by one.

Maybe Dick was right. His hallucinations were getting the better of him. After all, even if Damian was changing, it couldn’t be because of one girl, right?

Absolutely nobody in the world could wield enough power to reign in a demon such as him. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Tim had survived another week of hallucinations. He had tried sleeping more, laying off his coffee, and even cutting his hours back from Wayne Enterprises. But as he sat in the kitchen, going through his emails, his mind remained drowning in thoughts of his replacement.

“Timmy, do you know who this jacket belongs to? The ladies say it’s not theirs and if it’s one of Brucie’s night friends, I bet it’s worth thousands.”

Tim spared a glance from his laptop to where Jason stood in front of him, his fist clenched around a small black pullover. He had half the mind to wave him off when something pink flashed from the corner of his eye.

“Jason, let me see the jacket.”

Jason tossed it, his face cautious as if Tim were about to dart with his next paycheck, but it was the furthest thought in the younger Wayne’s mind.

“The girl that Damian is always bringing over, it belongs to her. His lab partner.”

“You mean Marinette? Damn, then I probably won’t make much off of it. Guess I’ll probably give it back next time I see her.”

Tim waited, his face showcasing the perplexion he felt as Jason seemed to walk away thoughtlessly. How he could come to the same conclusion that he did? How? It felt like it was so obvious.

“No.” His voice was firm, barely above a whisper as he shook off the thought, returning to his laptop. He agreed that he would drop it and that’s what he was going to do. “Marinette was just a nice girl trying to help out Damian and he probably views as some intriguing toy, yeah, that’s all.”

Besides, it was just one jacket and why would he want to damn the girl over one jacket.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . He should have damned her. That was the only thought that plagued his mind as he listened to the conversation at breakfast.

“Did you guys know that the Demon uses his phone during patrol?”

Bruce looked up from his paper, his face a mixture of disappointment and interest.

“Can you elaborate Dick? What do you mean by uses his phone?”

“Exactly that! We took a break on a roof in our sector and right as I was about to turn around to ask him where we should check next, he was answering a phone call! We sat on that roof for an hour because he said ‘he couldn’t hang up yet’.”

Tim nearly choked on his coffee as he slammed his mug into the table earning a glance from both the men.

“Richard, who was calling him?”

“Hmm? You know, I tried asking him but he waved me off instead.”

“You mean he didn’t try to tear your head off?” Tim watched in horror as Dick shook his head in denial, a small smile tugging at his lips.

“Maybe he finally has a friend other than Jon!”

Bruce nodded as if the notion weren’t completely insane, his eyes returning the newspaper in his hands. Dick smiled, returning to his crossword as if there was nothing wrong with the world as if he didn’t drop the largest bombshell in history.

“This is so wrong, why can’t any of you see how wrong this is?”

Neither spared him a glance as they continued their morning routines with thoughtless giddy expressions.

At this point, Tim wasn’t sure he could drop it anymore. There was so much evidence piling up, so much pointing that Damian obviously liked the girl at least. Why was he the only one who could see that?

It was decided. The next time Marinette came over, he was confronting this once and for all.

.  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Tim waited and waited. Weeks passed between her last visit to the manor. Damian had left several times and random hours of the day, always giving him vague answers as to where he was going. It was as if the little demon read his mind and decided it was safer to meet her outside the manor.

He was so close to giving up when a truly diabolical thought crossed his mind. His smile was sinister as he approached Bruce’s office, his plan foolproof. He gave a slight knock on the door, two voices asking him to enter.

“Hey Bruce, Dick. I was just thinking the other day, we haven’t seen Marinette around lately. You both know that Damian is terrible at keeping up with his acquaintances. Maybe we should invite her for dinner one night! I mean, we all adore her, right? She is such a good influence for Damian too.”

It was like clockwork. Both Dick and Bruce jumped on the opportunity each pulling out their phones to let both kids know the details of when this dinner party would occur. As Tim left out the room, he couldn’t help the hysterical giggle that escaped from his lips. For good measure, he made sure to linger by Damian’s room, awaiting the reaction he was longing to hear. Surely enough, a soft ‘shit’ could be heard followed by heavy footsteps echoing as if he was pacing his room. It was the best sound Tim had heard in weeks.

Three agonizing days passed before Tim found himself waiting at the manor door to welcome Marinette into the manor. Damian had volunteered to bring her to the dining room himself, but Tim argued that it would be rude if not a single one of them were also there to greet her. In the end, Tim and Dick were volunteered to accompany one angry demon to see Marinette to the dining hall.

“Thank you so much for having me! I was surprised when I received a call from not just Damian, but you too Dick. I was under the impression that Damian hadn’t said anything yet.”

Damian’s face paled as his eyes darted to Dick’s as if Marinette said something damning. Tim caught onto immediately, his eyes also watching Dick’s face for any indication that he had realized the weight in her statement.

“Said anything? You mean about your friendship? Well, it’s impossible to pry anything from him, but we couldn’t let him keep you all to himself!”

In all of his blissful ignorance, he turned on his heel, dragging Marinette with him, chatting idly about whatever came to mind. Damian raced after him, his face a mixture of panic and hatred. It was a sight that warmed Tim to his core.

All dinner he watched as Damian stirred the conversation off Marinette only for someone to inevitably bring it right back. He relished in Damian nearly pulling his own hair out to ensure no one asked the question that Tim had been pressing for weeks now.

As the night drew to an end, Damian couldn’t rush her out of the manor fast enough. The doors slammed shut with a loud thud ricocheting through everyone’s ears.

“So, we’re in agreeance right?”

Tim turned his attention to where Jason leaned against the entryway, his lazy smirk building hope in the younger boy’s chest.

“Very much. They are definitely courting, or what is the phrase you call it now? Dating? Hangin’?” Bruce chuckled at his own joke before his gaze dropped to meet Tim’s. “It looks like we owe you an apology.”

Words never sounded more beautiful to Tim, he honestly felt like he might shed a tear. A heavy weight caused him to stumble as Dick threw himself onto Tim’s back.

“Tim is like a genius or something, right guys? I mean who would have ever guessed that Damian had a girlfriend! Hey, do you think they’ll get married? Does that mean at this point Damian is your best chance at getting grandkids?”

Tim dealt with the picking and jokes and the onslaught of fake apologies as they remained crowded in the entrance, waiting for Damian’s return. To him, none of it mattered as much as seeing his replacement’s face the minute they walked through the door.

After all, it was a large reward for a small price to pay. It all comes with being a genius.

Permanent Tag List:

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[wrestlezon]

liveblog containment post for aew rampage 6/10/22

waow its eddie (vs hager...) here is a link to their intros. they did the "no time for intros on tv!!" thing eddie!!!!!!!!!!! kill this man ...............leg hold oh hes mad now. you chopped the wrong man hager is damp. i dont like this guy. boo hager NUT GRIP eddie that was great but: please grab literally anyone else's junk next time. thanks in advance >:( do NOT pin eddie excited for the hashtag ftretta match even tho i miss chuck severely im glad eddie pops his top down for us the viewers tho. dear chuck, please take some notes for when you return yaaaaaay eddie!!!!!!!!!!! because eddie won, i will not be mad.

oh. its a britt baker segment why is she butting into the toni storm thunder rosa thing... no.... please britt baker you SAID you'd CHILL. you'd let OTHERS have the SPOTLIGHT. you SAID THIS!!! really? would heel britt baker just go and do this? go on interviews and tell LIES?

this the show th' yall be waitin on adrenaline pumpin through yer chest this is make or break. my bones are made of stone so step inside the ring, im stompin through your soul this is rampage, screamin cause damage bump you with a vengeance... the finish to make you vanish boom boom boom boom sendin' back to the amateurs bringin back for a smackin' this a takedown (takedown) chyea ready for rampage this is rampage yeah uh this is rampage chyeah chyea this is rampage (lets go)

oh! ortiz video segment... buildup for that hair vs hair match

satnam singh finally in da ring! with uh. lethal those poor jobbers... tall man in da ring being tall uh huh. ok. well he was definitely in the ring and did moves

hookhausen segment! lmao. danhausen in the golf cart lmfao. hook in the. vehicle ok i love them. they are just two funny little rapscallions having fun

red velvet vs kris statlander!!! heel vs dark... kick ass, stat!!! aaaahhh!!! we love you omg. child sign HELL YEA STATLANDER COUNTER kill her stat!!!!!!!!!!!! murder!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! sorry velvet. youre up against kris statlander and i have allegiances climbing up the ring with velvet on her. just flipping velvet down. kris youre so strong catching velvet. big lift! kris statlander!!!!!!!!!!!!!! oh no!!! knee attacks!!! every time. we get got by the rampage commercial jumpscare big lift! corner fight!! what the! kicking out of statlander's big spinny move!! THE ROLLUP TO SUPLEX... TO BIG SLAM TO ANOTHER KICKOUT???????? aahhhhhh!!! what the heck!!!!! how many times must statlander fireman carry velvet before she wins nooooo!! knees to the back of the head! velvet doing cutter moves!!! face kicks!!!!!!!!!!!?????????? AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA spinny kick: grabbed! statlander: yelling power punch! yay statlander wins NOOO BLUE KIERA ATTACKS...?? nooooo!!! violence!!!!! where is stats friends. where are her stable theres anna jay! no! theyre getting owned!! athena: to the rescue? lmfao WHAT THE!! INTERCEPTED BY EVERY OFFICIAL u_u i hope they get their revenge on the baddies someday

segment about the ethan page vs miro fight on wednesday! miro!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! oh no dan lambert alert -_- lmfao ok nevermind the camera zoomed in on ethan page and now hes off camera ethan page is cool and i like him. he has a hot bod AND charismas AND is good at talking. i wish he was not with dan lambert.

boom boom boom boom. send it back to the amateurs... this is rampage...

trent!!!!!!!!!!!! ftr!!!! backstage segment. uhh the other guys are there too ftr are so lmao @ this guy trent: yall hangin out with nerdasses

wednesdays gonna have some cool matches

oh! main event time! ftretta!!! vs aussie open! and ospreay trent and his goofy little waddle oh they too-slowed trent??? dont bully him i am missing the best friends. i am mourning. im bereft trents looking good btw. yeah i'll say it. hot a what. this is who i am now i say stuff like that. i talk about the hot men. can you believe that? its unbelievable. to just say that men are hot lmfao what is dax's little slaps here oh no! theyre beating up ftr! trents tagging himself in. is the bumpmaster going to be taking bumps oh hell!!! sick ddt from trent! he is just standing around while guys are fighting. shrug oh cool moonsault trent oh no! his ankle... no!!!!!!!!!!!!!! big corner kick from team njpw!!! look i know trent is just trent and thats ftr but could the enemy team not kill and then pin trent. please. for me and my poor heart theyre folding up trent into shapes. theyre putting him the corner and punching him. theyre chokeholding him!!! noooo trent!!! trent gets out! get em dax empire getting dismantled! triple suplex! four-- LMAO KICK TAG-IN? get em cash yesss i love tag team collab moves and ftr does them great oh no! now cash is getting murdered noooo dont pin cash!! noooooooo cutter finisher moves ! ftr do not lose against these bad guys who jump people in the middle of matches hurricarana! tagging trent in and he is on one leg. is this a good idea get em trent no his ddt got countered!! oh no!!! ospreay killing ftr NOT THE ROLL UP yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay trent got the big win! go trent woo

[muwur]

snapchat headcanons

✧ hc’s ✧ for using snapchat w ur boi toi ft. the pretty setter squad

❧ gn reader

✎ 3.1k words

a/n: kinda a combo of how they use sc and the kinds of snaps they send you! along w wat u send them, and uh... dating stuf n shenanigans? texting/snapping habits? my fantasies? IDEK ANYMORE EOFHEFJ

this was born from the recesses of my mind , which desired nothing mor than snapchats from suga , us sending cute selfies , others bein dumb n chaotic , no context videos , n him snapping me photos of some mangoes on sale he said he’ll buy for me DXX it’s too late for me now

doing research on hq bois and surfing thru sc features (im just now realizing theres quite a bit?? im hoping i address most of them at some point lolol) instead of real life tings aHHhhhHAHA

requests: open! will be working on a suga one i got, dw, requester!

sugawara

✧ sends good morning and good night snaps

✧ so he’s rlly good at keeping streaks, probs has the longest ones (one of them being y’alls streak)

✧ posts tidbits of volleyball practice on his story every once in a while

✧ snaps you pics of his sleeping teammates when they’re coming back to school after a long day of matches , adding a single ‘❤️’ as a caption

✧ he will also create colorful masterpieces on all of them

✧ gives daichi a santa beard, tanaka a squiggly stache (i imagine it to look like spongebob n patrick’s seaweed ones now that were mEN), n kageyama sum angry brows,,, wait he already has them lolol u good der kags

✧ posts a picture of you when you’re hanging out, captioning it: “🥰“

✧ has conversations with you purely via snaps

✧ ranges from casual chats and checking up on u to crackwhoring ( ** indicates the photo, while the “” quotes indicate the caption, all snaps are italicized, otherwise its regular dialogue)

✧ suga: *peace sign* “hey sweetheart, how r u?”

✧ you: *pics of homework* “ahh, drowning in school ;-; i cant wait for this week to be over fghjkl”

✧ suga: *close up with :o on his face* “let’s study together tmrw!”

✧ or

✧ suga: *complete darkness* “its 3 am n i cant sleep”

✧ you: *the top half of your head, laying on a pillow* “ ;( aw babe. do u want me to send something to help u sleep?”

✧ suga: *still in darkness* “y u still up?? go sleep. n 🥺 yes pls”

✧ you: *snaps pics of feet* “that’ll be 50 bucks, pay up” 

✧ suga: *darkness remains* “can we make a trade instead? i promise to make it worth ;)”

✧ ok now u BOTH cant sleep (im sry my crackheading be acting up around 2am eeryday, i stan a mischievous suga--)

✧ video chats (in the darkness lol) instead until you both pass out (im not in luv u r 😭)

✧ super down to take filtered selfies w you

✧ does all the silly ones with you (things like ’angry face’ or the frog one)

✧ but also rlly digs lookin cute with you using some heart crowns, y’all an aesthetic (n crakhead) duo fosho

✧ def subscribes to life hacks and tries them out himself, has a 50% success rate

kageyama

✧ doesn’t rlly use snapchat too much

✧ but when he does

✧ will either send you a picture to indicate he’s at volleyball practice (wow wat a sexi lookin gym floor)

✧ or some random picture of whatever he’s doing at the moment (*drinking milk*)

✧ this is mostly in order to save streaks

✧ he’s so bad at streaks

✧ “why does it matter?? what’s the point of sending just black screens or whatever’s in front of you at the moment??”

✧ can’t keep a consistent streak for more than 3 days and also doesn’t care (until hinata challenges him to see who can have the longer one)

✧ when you send him videos of him playing, he really focuses on them to try to improve his technique. asks you to send those vids to him (assuming u saved them, which u did)

✧ but when you look over his shoulder when he’s watching a video and give him some compliment (“i recorded at the perfect moment! that was a really good set, kageyama!”), he gets a bit flustered

✧ gets even more flustered but pretty happy whenever you post videos on your story showing karasuno winning some points with captions like:

✧ “footage of the legendary quick >.>” or “karasuno crows flyin high!” or “these bois make my heart 😭 im so proud”

✧ you WILL catch him off guard in photos, using filters that surrounds his head w/ emojis like 🥺💖🥰💘

✧ you also put these on your story (to his dismay)

✧ ppl comment on these mor than anything else (n for those who dont rlly kno kageyama, theyre kinda surprised to him like this)

✧ hinata snickers “hey kageyama you look pretty good here--”

✧ takes some selfies with you, mostly cuz you want them

✧ saves them after u send them over (n secretly cherishes them)

✧ occasionally watches his subscriptions, they’ll usually involve sports, mostly volleyball (who woulda guessed)

✧ you use his bitmoji to test out random facial expressions you would never see him wear

✧ you: “can you smile and wink like this? act like you’re the obnoxious charming guy in a shojo.”

✧ will actually attempt, but it looks so bad that you die inside and he never wants to try again cuz of ur laughing outburst (you: “😭😭 bb im sorry i couldnt help it”)

oikawa

✧ literally sends you anything and everything

✧ morning bathroom selfie to show off how good his hair came out that day, saying:

✧ “he has risen”

✧ or “i woke up like this”

✧ and my favorite, “you’re lucky you get this content for frEE”

✧ selfies with iwa, who just looks annoyed and exasperated at the camera

✧ sends you pics of his lunch and snacks (“bet u wish u had milk bread too”)

✧ always packs extra milk bread so he could convince you to stay at his practice after school--

✧ FILTERSS

✧ I CANNOT STRESS THIS ENUF

✧ will either use the filters that make him kayooottt (cute)

✧ loves the ones named ‘hearts,’ ‘soft,’ ‘peach,’ ‘butterfly cheeks,’ vsco filters LOL, etc

✧ uses ‘big mouth’ when he feelin a bit sASSY; also loves to use this one when he rants, it channels his inner valley girl

✧ sometimes he’ll be snacking or drinking something while he does so (“hey guys today im gonna eat these milk buns from my favorite bakery and this bomb orange juice and complain about this little kid who talked smack to me earlier and almost made me cry--”)

✧ takes cute selfies with you, is an aesthetic selfie king, puts them on his story to show off he’s hangin with you

✧ but on your story you only post the ones he looks bad in LOL

✧ has separate stories for his every need, some r private (and lucky you, ur included in all of them)

✧ titles them ‘mean things iwa said to me today,’ ‘ranting hotbox + mukbangs,’ ‘a day in the life of oikawa,’ ‘volleyball 🏐,’ ‘unpopular opinions,’ etc. 

✧ fitting room photoshoots lol

✧ “y/n, what do you think of this??” “and this?” “oOH WHAT ABOUT THIS??”

✧ ends up calling you through video chat so you can live critique his choices

✧ “oikawa, please no, i can’t be seen with you in public if you wear those--”

✧ also changes his bitmoji’s outfits from time to time, hopes you’ll notice, but you don’t LOL (oikawa: ;((((((( )

kenma

✧ uses sc usually just to reply to messages ppl send him

✧ indifferent about streaks, but keeps a few with ppl he’s closer to

✧ mindlessly plays the snapchat games with you, finds some of them kinda cute

✧ you both made his bitmoji for him, dressing his up in the orange cat suit

✧ you also helped make kuroo’s and put his in the black cat suit to match--

✧ snaps you every time he gets a new game, starts playing it, and once he finishes

✧ started to post some gameplays and reviews on his sc story (might as well add them to sc since he was already on other social platforms), and ended up amassing a large following

✧ follows the tech and gaming stories on sc

✧ as well as the ones with cute animals--

✧ open to selfies with you, usually wears a calm expression and holds up a peace sign

✧ even occasionally sticks his tongue out

✧ his story is occasionally heavily bombarded with candids of him w/ pretty sc filters, all taken by you

✧ but of all the filters, you love using the clout glasses on him

✧ especially when he’s just minding his own business

✧ “kenma, in his tru habitat” when hes cocooned in a blanket

✧ “kenma, on his way to steal yo manz” while on his way to the bathroom

✧ “kenma, next iron chef. watch out gordon” as he’s cooking instant ramen

✧ “kenma” n das it

✧ but he thinks it meme-y so he lets you do whatever you want, kinda digs it

✧ you end up dedicating your snap story to memes of kenma and the nekoma volleyball team. ppl are in it for the shits n giggles n hot bois

✧ you later discover someone else did the same thing with their volleyball team filled with hot bois from shiratorizawa, and you befriend tendou and share funni internet tings

akaashi

✧ 99% of his photos include either you or bokuto or both

✧ bokuto spams akaashi’s story and contact list with selfies and videos of himself using weird filters, often gets you to join him

✧ has several streaks, but will send something with more substance than a black screen or his bedroom window

✧ will usually involve smthng that just happened to him or smthing he saw, like:

✧ “a kind older lady offered me some apples in return for helping her”

-or:

✧ “how do i break the news to bokuto that the yaikniku place he’s been wanting to go to for the past week ,,, is closed today”

✧ o n let’s not leave out:

✧ “is it possible to conjure a ghost using a wooden spatula, ketchup, and a chalk drawn hexagram? bokuto’s been paranoid ever since he tried last night and i dont know what to tell him. seriously, help”

✧ looks through stories occasionally, comments whenever bokuto makes questionable decisions

✧ also comments on whatever you’ve posted. his words range from “you’re cute” to “why,” depending on the content

✧ ppl know when y’all are hanging out cuz he’ll post smthing to indicate he’s with you, usually it’s some candid and you’re not paying attention

✧ appreciation posts for you as well! esp if you got him something, like onigiri or his fav, Nanohana no Karashiae , for lunch! (akaashi: *snaps a pic of his food* “thank you y/n for feeding me”)

✧ prefers video calling over texting/snapping whenever possible tho

✧ occasionally reminisces thru his sc memories

✧ enjoys the flashback feature and will send them to you and bokuto (cuz they’re about y’all anyway lolol)

✧ also has secretly saved a bunch of selfies of himself, consists of him trying out a lot of the filters (he feelin himself)

✧ you, one day, looking thru his phone and discovering them: “akaashi, you’re so pretty wtf”

✧ akaashi: “...”

koganegawa

✧ sends you selfies of him before practice

✧ during breaks

✧ and after practice, usually makes a comment about how it went for him that day like:

✧  “i hit a decent toss today and futakuchi actually complimented me!”

✧ that, or:

✧ “i got yelled at 17 times today 😢😩”

✧ has quite a few streaks, his longest ones being with you and hinata

✧ def uses filters

✧ tries out every funny one he finds and sends you videos

✧ “look y/n im an aaaaAALlliiEEENnnNNN oo oo hoo hhhooOOh”

✧ “now im a chicky nuggy!!” (chicken nugget)

✧ also enjoys the doodle feature

✧ but he uses the filter with the clout glasses unironically--

✧ usually when smth good happens to him and he feels happy and/or cool about it

✧ “just beat the boss in this game on my 69th try B)”

✧ “kogane, that’s--”

✧ plays sc games with you and thinks bitmojis r cool

✧ kinda sad he cant find a hair option that matches him tho lolol rip

✧ you: “you hair’s just,,, unique,,,”

✧ subscribed to anything sports and fitness, as well as pop culture so he can stay in the loop

✧ also watches everyone else’s stories, pointing out whenever he sees smthing cool and/or interesting

✧ “woahh, karasuno’s at nationals right now! i wish we could’ve won, but next year for sure!!”

✧ you encourage him at all his games, hyping him up irl and online

✧ “koganegawa: best setter 😍!!”

✧ luckily you didnt record the parts he completely messed up LOL

semi

✧ before going out with you, snaps you a pic of his casual outfit like:

✧ semi: “does this look ok”

✧ you: “babe you look great, tendou was just messing with you”

✧ will make unwanted appearances on tendou’s snap and complains to you about them

✧ “i didnt consent to being part of his meme page” and

✧ “okay, but he didn’t only have to share all the moments i messed up--”

✧ also indifferent about streaks but will do them

✧ sometimes sends snaps/streaks indicating he’s practicing his music

✧ when you see these you usually ask him to send you vids or if you can come over n watch

✧ initially is a bit shy about it but he loves what he does and you and knows you’re genuinely interested and supportive so he agrees

✧ secretly rlly enjoys having you as his personal audience

✧ lowkey into asmr, like the soap cutting shit as well as chewing crunchy things

✧ also watches food porn and clips of mukbangs, then can’t resist going on youtube and watching the whole thing

✧  “y/n, can we try this, it looks so good--”

✧ will also often watch oikawa’s stories, especially his ‘ranting hotbox + mukbangs,’ and makes comments about him being an idiot

✧  “this kid he’s talking about is a savage”

✧ but admits they’re quite entertaining

✧ just looks serious in all the selfies you take with him

✧ you: “can you look like you’re enjoying yourself?”

✧ semi: “i look cooler like this tho”

✧ sc memories filled with shenanigans from you and the volleyball team, doodles, and mirror selfies with him experimenting diff looks (you: “tendou, you got him way too concerned about this”)

✧ also enjoys showing off he’s with you, taking a short video of you when you hang out

✧ you: “semi, i look bad right now”

✧ semi: “but you can never look bad”

✧ you: “🥺 bb”

✧ viewers: “aw”

✧ shiratorizawa: “can he be this nice with us LOL”

shirabu

✧ his main mode of communication with you is mostly through the regular messaging app, so he doesn’t use sc too much

✧ also doesn’t care for streaks and is bad at keeping them

✧ will answer to you or his senpais rather soon tho

✧ but lets all his other notifications pile up a bit before finally going thru them

✧ goes through the snaps he receives really fast, spending like 2 seconds each to look at them cuz aint nobody got time for dat

✧ doesn’t even rlly open goshiki’s LOL

✧ you have fun using filters on him and taking videos while he’s just doing his own thing peacefully like studying

✧ it takes him a second to notice and when he finally looks up, he just gives you an exasperated look

✧ cue you cracking up with laughter bc the filter finally shows up on his face

✧ his eyes and mouth are now on mike wazowski

✧ that, or his face becomes so disturbingly moRPhed like an alien

✧ caption: “ken-chan, my future medical man 😍”

✧ “y/n, please, this is like the 7th time in the last 20 minutes--”

✧ finally convinced him to take a study break and hang out with you

✧ which usually consists of snacking and light banter while you lay your head on his lap

✧ and scrolling through snapchat stories and showing him what everyone else is up to and cool things you’re subscribed to

✧ “loooook, dr. miami’s doing another butt job! is this the line of work you’re studying so hard for?”

✧ “no, it’s really not”

✧ is actually very soft with you and likes having the photos and vids for memories

atsumu

✧ sends you snaps where his brother looks bad, captioning it:

✧ “this is evidence that im the hotter twin”

✧ likewise, osamu sends you snaps where atsumu looks even worse

✧ like, the mans passed out, looking rekt and open mouthed, drool seeping into his pillow

✧ osamu: “u still have time to break up with him”

✧ also lucky for you, atsumu also loves to take unflattering photos of you and send them to you randomly at like 2 am

✧ you: “nani tf when did you even take this??”

✧ usually posts a snap while he’s out somewhere like at a match, the gym, outside on a run, a party, or just hanging out with you or his frens

✧ however, makes sure you look good if you show up on his story cuz he wants to show you off

✧ doesn’t really care for streaks, but has a lott

✧ but also has a tON of unopened snaps

✧ is the type to send just a black screen n call it a day, or maybe spice it up by sending a pic of the sexi gym floor (a comeback) w his shoe in the corner

✧ will, however, consistently respond to you and kinda looks forward to ur snaps (secretly hopes you show ur face)

✧ but when you dont:

*in class*

✧ atsumu: *a smirk on his face* “your content’s kinda dry today” 

✧ you: *your sexi desk* “my nudez ain’t free, i demand compensation”

✧ atsumu: *grasped his chin in thought, but angled the cam up bc he needa hide his phone in class lolol* “what if i... take you out on a romantic excursion”

✧ you: * your face but with ‘sausage’ filter* “🥵🥵🥵🥵 yessir, what u want”

✧ rlly only wants to have pics of your face wat a closeted sOFTIE

✧ likes to have content on his flashbacks

✧ usually has other social media sources to keep up to date with things

✧ actually rlly digs using sc filters, mostly ones that’ll make him look like a queen

✧ captions a selfie of you two like: “me >>>>>>> y/n”

✧ but nearly everyone who comments on it is like: “i think you flipped the sign, bro 🤥”

✧ judges ppl who are into soap cutting asmr (you will never hear the end of it if you also like it)

a/n: sc kinda dying for me, my use went from suga to an atsumu to like nearly nonexistent LOL

also o gawd i already have ideas here n there for a pt 2 so stay tuned fjxnwfesd hope it takes me less long cuz this one took me fkin foreva LOL

idk y i made semi like mukbangs but i feel like he’d be rlly into them--

[originlist]

oh oh oh i made a team for pkmn au ritsu

the eevee takes the place of their starter, though it’s not the one they’ve had the longest, which is togekiss. they’re still in their 20s in pokemon au since theyve already done a good bit of journeying. theyre from unova and just hangin out in random regions bc its all good lads the zygarde 10% is a stand-in on the card, what they actually have is a zygarde cell that hangs out with them. it can turn into a 10% if the other option is dying but mostly its just a little guy that hangs out and attracts other legendaries to come say hi. ritsu doesnt treat it any differently its just a lil guy. the snom was captured specifically to be worm pals with zygarde cell. the banette ritsu picked up in a back alley and it craves violence so bad but theyre just “aww, ur silly<3”.

i wanna make other pokemon teams for my muses so bad gimmie someone if u wanna see em poke-ified.

[cnc-hoebayb]

Dumb dad things the boys would be caught doing

Zabdiel

-super casual and simple but like

-Hed totally get caught just pushing your kid over

-Like he doesn’t know you saw so when your little boy just plops down and starts whining you just “why’d you do that?”

-And he plays it off “i didn’t do anything wym”

-“Zabdiel i literally just saw you push our son”

-He shrugs

-“I think he kinda deserved it”

-DESERVED IT

-bc he was in his bubble apparently ur kid deserved it. Valid

-probably would get caught having a full convo with your son too

-not even about fun cute kid stuff either, it’s about things he needs to remember to do, telling him a story about something douchey someone did on tour

-Thats just very Zabdi, long deep thought out talks with his bb son about life even though he can’t understand

-K but something dangerous but not really

-Zabdiel is kinda aloof sometimes rigjt

-and is big gentle man giant

-So i see him as doing something like letting your toddler climb him literally like a tree when he’s bored and while Zab is busy on the phone or doing something important and just can’t handle it rn

-example

-Hes multitasking big time while you’re gone

-He needs to be on this call right now, but has to start making dinner and cleaning some little messes here and there

-Your son is begging for attention that he just can’t give

-so he does what any dad would do and just picks him up to ease him

-And after awhile ur kid gets kinda restless, starts climbing dad like a play thing

-he climbs up and down his torso, on his head, jumping back onto him from the counter when Zabdi sets him down for a second

-Which is valid given Zabdiel can handle it and can take care of his kid, but...

-it’s not the best sight to see walking in the door to your family with your son next to a hot stove top, plunging himself off to dangle off of your baby daddies stiff arm

Erick

-Youre driving home from work/school after a long day

-You pull into your neighborhood and on the corner of your street you spot it

-Your child

-On a baby leash

-in somEONES YARD

-rolling around in the leaves

-Erick just laughing and encouraging

-and you honk at them from your view in your car and when he sees you

-He starts laughing even harder

-Totally catch him one night playing with your kid in his room

-and as you peek in you see them just hangin, playin and all of a sudden your son snatches a plastic Dinosaur rigjt out of Ericks hands

-and Erick really sadly “heeeyy- i was playing with that 😞”

-Hed start fake crying

-Your son gets sad too and starts actually crying

-“lo siento, daddy im really sorry” in between sobs (also imagine that voice and ur lil boy with a lisp)

-Erick panics

-“aahh esta bien, niño. Let’s play with the Dino together.”

-Holds your little boy in his lap and they play together

-You cry happy tears a lil bit in the hallway

-Erick is also still like a child so this is 100% truth:

-Would get caught actually genuinely arguing with your son

-Theyre yelling at each other (your son in baby toddler babbles), and Erick is heated heated

-“que está pasando niños??” You try to gauge the situation immediately

-“he stole my last ice cream sandwich i hid in the fridge!!”

-You want to yeLL

-“Erick...”

-he glares at your son, who revolts with a tongue sticking out and arms crossed

-“you think you’ll get away with it, huh? Cuz ur cute,” he argues with him and you have to actually talk him down from his stubbornness

-“i was saving it for later today :(( “ he whines as you pull him in like you would your baby for a comforting “its ok” hug

Joel

-You’d be in the kitchen

-Come out into the living room to ask Joel to get ur little baby ready to eat

-And you catch him deadass recording your baby crying on the floor, a pile of toys around her

-“bro tf”

-“She was dancing and fell into her toy box”

-“Then whY you recording ?”

-“.....bc it was funny 😔”

-Would also do your daughters hair himself sometimes and dress her

-And you know he knows what he’s doing

-But like he also forgets she’s a baby too

-You have to remind him your daughter really shouldn’t be using his grown man curl products just yet

-or that she can’t wear a shirt that says “fuck” in it

-and she is definitely not wearing a bandana like that to picture day

-teaches your kid how to thirst trap !!

-this hoe!

-catch them both in the bathroom mirror one day, he’s shirtless, lil cute baby girl in his arms

-and she’s serving !!

-Like duh she’s your guys’ kid so she’s beautiful n shit but

-she’s posing and tilting her head in the right angles in this cute lighting (bc daddy taught her to find her perfect angle)

-He shrugs like “what’d you expect, we’re hot stuff” and smirks

Richard

-Openly and unapologetically teaching your kid how to say bad words

-and recoRDING IT

- to POST on his insta

-also would get caught scripting a whole thing for her to perform for the camera

-convinces her that the reason his hair is red is bc he drank all of his juice mommy gave him instead of spilling it out for the dog to drink

-your kid chugs down that juice like her life depends on it so she can have red hair like papi too

-tells her stories that the snacks she wants to eat before dinner make you scream and that’s why she shouldn’t eat them before dinner

-convinces her by shoving his mouthful of potato chips and immediately starts screaming to prove his point

-ur kid laughs but is also kinda terrified

-gets caught reading her stories and getting reallyyyy into it

-like acting and doing dramatically different voices for the characters

-Does the Joel thing and just dresses her head to toe in ICE like the most expensive jewelry and clothes

-kinda salt bc you don’t even dress like that

-have to stop her before you send her to school bc you know she’s gonna lose one of those expensive necklaces in the sand box or something

Christopher

-Another instance where you’re driving home alone

-Whipping down the street to see your toddler running down the sidewalk a few blocks away happily

-You flip and swerve over to park on the side of the street bc wtf ! Your kid !!

-But as soon as you park you see him

-Its Chris sprinting just as fast, frantically too

-Finally catches up with your kid and swoops her up in his arms with a relieved breath

-You roll down your window slowly

-“You pretty lil things need a ride home?” You yell out and when he looks up to see you caught him he’s dEAD

-also teaches your daughter how to cuss and cackles so hard bc it’s funny to hear her call each of her uncles “puto”

-id see something happening like

-You walk out of the room for one second during dinner and when you come back it’s food fight chaos

-Chris and your kid are racing to see who can eat the fastest but also there’s food flying everywhere bc they’re trying to distract one another and win

-lil baby hits Chris in the eye with a fistful of eggs (in this scenario it’s breakfast for dinner thx) and then he counters the hit by throwing his whole pancake at her face

-also gets caught playing dress up a little too good

-You glimpse in her room and she’s painting his nails, slapping on some gross little kid lipgloss all over his face

-and all the while Chris is smiling and acting like a pretty lady, flipping his hair around and batting his lashes all nice

-they spew some chisme back and forth, sip fake tea, and do cute model walks down the room

-You take secret pictures of the event for later blackmail

[lucatorahaven]

vampire au post

4 skype convos haphazardly mixed in from very different times

[29/11/2014 4:27:51 AM] Probably Not Assorted Cheeses: Vampire au

Lucas the incompetent vampire who eats mostly animals

Duster was the one who bit him, only bc duster was literally starving n lucas came at a bad time

idk if duster should be born a vampire or not but Wes is one too and together they taught lucas how to survive.

however eventually they had to leave, they offered for lucas to join them but lucas can’t leave his family behind, the kid’s too sentimental :’(

so together they staged his death (which im too lazy to try n think of)

claus knew bout the vampire thing tho, lucas couldn’t live alone like that. He also ended up biting Boney in an accident so hey vampire dog.

claus grew up and eventually had his own family. Lucas could only really watch from afar but then the kids got his age and it was hard to see him and keep the gig up. He visited his parents funeral anonymously and afterwards him and claus stood there just

“sup” “how’re the kids” “twice your age and with kids of their own” “heh, i always thought you would be the one with kids yano?” 

it was very bittersweet, it felt like they’ve never been apart 

“it never stops feeling strange without you” "I know” 

lucas thinks of that conversation a lot

he started off the "younger uncle" then the "weird neighbourhood kid that visits grandpa claus" and inevitably the "weird kid from nowhere who goes to the cemetary every other month to put flowers on graves older than appears to be"

SO without attachments lucas traveled with boney, hoping that they find duster along the way.

eventually lucas comes back to tazmilly but it’s been a couple hundred years now and it’s completely different so he doesn’t recognize it

n lucas one day is caught outside with no shelter, it’s almost morning so he runs into osohe (which is way outta town so he assumed it was abandoned)

vampires can’t enter homes without being invited in because apparently homes are holy land but osohe is fuckn haunted so that doesn’t apply (adding on to the abandoned theory)

that’s how kumatora and him meet, she finds him exploring osohe all “wtf the fuck who are YOU...this me house”

So she gets an awkward lie explanation from lucas 

n she eventually catches on lucas is a vampire n is just DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUDE I NEVER MET A VAMPIRE BEFORE FUCKN SWEET

lucas is just UM.;;; IS IT OK IF I STAY

"oh dude it's cool!! but u gotta tell me bout yourself bc i never met a vampire before ok?? i live iN THE PERFECT GOTHIC HOME BUT THERE’S NONE!! but here you are and i’m JACKED i gotta go to work tho so brb but afterwards u gotta tell me about yourself ok CYA"

lucas is still processing everything by the time she leaves, but he’s grateful and figures a conversation is the least he can do to repay her

in this au kumatora’s into cryptology bc her house is FULL of books and it’s a common subject (also the fact her castle is filled with ghosts and there are zombies just across the moat, it’s a p convenient hobby)

when she comes back she’s super excited because he’s still there 

lucas is kinda reserved but he still answers questions bc it’s POLITE

she asks bout p much everything?? “HEY do you need that” “y-yes” “is this true?” “not that i know of” “ok experiment time” “uH;;” “wait am i keeping you up?? it’s still daytime” “no it’s okay” 

after exhausting lucas of all his Vampire Facts kuma invites lucas to live at osohe castle, it’s big enough anyways

lucas is wary af bc he doesn't wanna accidentally get close to someone who 1. has a life span and 2. is technically food

but lucas ends up sticking around anyways, boney really likes it and he lowkey enjoys her company

so they keep chillin n lucas tells her how he hunts animals n how he only takes a bit of blood so they don't die and 

IDK I GO BY THE THEORY THAT VAMPIRES HAVE VENOM bc otherwise their entire food source becomes COMPETITION n they can bite but not?? TURN THEM INTO ANYTHIng so controlled blood flow for feeding purposes

also vampires only need to eat once or twice a month? they die around 6+ months without eating from starvation. It all depends on how quickly the blood cells in their body die basically.

ALSO when they bite you it doesn’t hurt bc their saliva numbs it so (sneaky bites) but it still feels weird as shit

bUT YA SO LUCAS N KUMATORA CHAt a whole bunch...you know that “accidentally get close” thing i mentioned? it happened

(it was kinda hard to avoid when the first companion you have that’s not your dog is informed on vampires and vampire goods, that was convenient)

so they keep hangin out and kumatora unlocks his Tragic Backstory

n sometimes kumatora helps him feed? like they go out together finding animals n storing blood

n lucas is fascinated with how technology has advanced bc he doesn't really?? go into towns anymore but he fuckn LOVES it

n they play video games n general COOL FUNTIMES

kumatora let’s lucas borrow her labtop to occupy himself and he looks for other vampires or hints of them

(this is under the assumption that osohe can get electricity in a modern au while still being ignored / abandoned)

n when kumatora goes to work he cleans up the castle n tries to show how much hE REALLY APPRECIATES HEr

n lIKE i also go by the logic that vampires do not do the stereotypical “turn into ashes at sunlight” it is a slow progression that takes up to 12 hours until absolutely turned to a crisp 

so basically if he covers himself and wears a shit ton of sunscreen he can chill in the middle of the day for like...a hour or two

and bc kumatora's WORTH IT he visits her at work n she's all LucAS WHAT ARe yO U DoING??   

lookin like a modern goth kid......has a huge red burn on his cheek..

he blames it on how pale/blonde he is “my brother is ginger you know”

kuma gets super worried n he's all bruh it cool i have like..2 more hours until i need to go to a hospital   

n kumas jsuT I GET OFF IN 4 HOURS GO HOME

kumatora invites him to movie nights with her friends n shit

people start calling lucas kumatora's goth boyfriend “never call him that when he's around or i'll murder you”

theyre all rather cool with lucas and find his speech kinda funny?

"wow look at those teeny boppers" "GET A LOAD OF THIS GUY GOD I LOVE IT" “???????????????" kumas friends ask for lucas more all WHAT SCHOOL DOES HE GO TO WHERE DOES HE LIVE "oh he's......foreign B)"

eventually it comes up how lucas doesn’t really want to be a vampire anymore and kumatoras just “dude i can help you find a cure” bc maybe her hobby is a bit Excessive but live your dreams

but ya lucas is just?? constantly wants to visit kumatora n loves her night shifts!! visits all the time they go on hikes a lot n jusT? GETS SO FUCKIGN ATTACHED IT SCARES HIM CONSTANTLY

they sometimes fall asleep on the couch together n when he's all "wow shes so cute.." he realizes how fucking Deep he’s in this and he’s FUCKED

he tries to distance himself but he Can’t Fucking Do It (just like w/ his fam)

whenever he tries to push her away she looks so upset it kills him 

N HE'S IN SUCH A STRUGGLE BC HE'S JUST

SO HAPPY TO BE AROUND HER??????

N LIKE WHEN THEY CUDDLE N STUFF HE'S JUST SO OVERWHELMED BC oh my god heartbeats!! oh my god she's gonna die before me

n lucas really fucking feels the severity of how FUCKED he is when its her birthday n hes just

yes she's gonna age and he's gonna outlive her n they could never realistically be happy even if by some offhand chance she even RETURNS the feelings

N HE HAS TO HIDE HIS CRYING N STUFF BUT KUMATORA HAS  A 6TH FUCKN SENSE FOR DISTRESSED LUCAS SO SHE'S ALL bruh :( whats up

so he opens up to her about his feelings and anxiety and she hugs him through it, it’s kind of a shitty way to confess 

“idk if i can forgive you for deciding that i’m gonna die before you” “are you threatening murder” “that and no way death’s gonna get me, i’m pretty stubborn”

a lil while passes

“you know... i’m okay with becoming a vampire” lucas refuses bc dude.. you can’t even comprehend the weight of immortality.. what if she regrets it 

“to hell if i make my closest friend suffer because of a life span” “hah i guess that’s the same for me”

they drop the vampire topic for the time being and move on to other ones such as... mutual feelings :^)

they’re both romantically inclined i mean... lucas spent 300+ years being a hermit and kumatora had other things to do

so they take it slow, it’s p much the same as before except.. hey...now when i think “man i wanna hold their hand” i CAN

it'd also be really sad and/or cute if the ghosts in the castle some of them were lucas's family which might be why boney likes it so much but also imagine them kissin on the couch "kuma ghosts r there" "EH THEYRE JUst ghosts" ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) claus looks into the camera "after so long... finally my little brother gets some action :')"

but idk if that’s a thing bc it feels kinda weird i feel like kissin n shit wouldn't b very often bc as much as they both loVE IT 

IT'S NOT THAT GREAT FOR A VAMPIRE

YANO.... HEARTS R BEATING... NECK IS RIGHT THERE (lucas still adores it tho)

so back to the topic of Mortality

kuma gets attacked in an alley on the way home from work

n lucas finds her bc they were gonna meet up but he smelt the blood and when he does find her he just goes FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK n didn't know how to save her 

also thinking rationally is hard when OH LOOK AT ALL THAT BLOOD AHhaHA

SO HE BITES HER

he carries her body home n he spends the whole waiting process between DEAD and VAMPIRE crying just "hoyl shti please work please work" “what did i fucking dooooo” “what if i was earlier” “what if i was too late” so many anxieties

kuma wakes up and lucas transistions from panic to HAPPY PANIC OH THANK GOD

she’s really out of it bc of the process and he’s crying apologies “it’s okay you saved me” but he’s still crying, they cuddle for comfort

"hey atleast we did it NOW when i'm a hot sexy 19 yr old and not a wrinkly old lady” “kuma” “i’m tryna make light of the conversation”

so now that kumatora’s a vampire she only works night shifts until she eventually quits. They moved to a new town / whatever so it was easy to avoid having to meet someone in the daytime. facebook helped keep in touch with her friends while still letting the friendship die out.

it took kumatora a bit to get used to being a vampire. she threw up a lot at first and she didn’t like having to drink blood but she did eventually get used to it

idk if they find a cure bc idk what the cure would BE but they eventually find other vampires :^) they continued lucas’s search for duster and probably found him tbh

[outragedslime]

1, 6, 16, 22, and 26!! For the ask meme

tysm!!! ill put em under a cut so it doesnt take up half the dashboard dgfjkdfgj i write a LOT SORRY GKFLHG

1. if you were to have Hanahaki disease, what flowers would you cough up?

ough… ok i love. flowers. i love all flowers. but my absolute favs are speedwells? and i guess id also cough up flowers for the person im coughing them up For so id throw in some bloodroot and dogwood..   does this disease work if the love Is requited. EITHER WAY GDHKFLH

6. name five iconic quotes that make you feel things.omg ok the whole experience of all of these movies imma list is like. tremendous. these movies (and show) got a great impact that one or two quotes for the life o them cannot cover the scale of emotion it gave me so… just gdfkh the source is more important than any of the actual quotes i write here tbh. theyre amazing they All made me cry.

1. Sing Street - “Look at her. She races home every evening just to catch that last little bit of sun, have a cigarette and read her papers. She’s always talking about going on a holiday to Spain, but he never takes her. That’s all she gets. Then that tall tree blocks it, and she comes in. I often wonder what she’s thinking about.”

2. Garden State - “We may not be as happy as you always dreamed we would be, but, for for the first time let’s just allow ourselves to be whatever it is that we are.” 

3. Good Will Hunting - “No. No, no no no. Fuck you, you don’t owe it to yourself man, you owe it to me. Cuz tomorrow I’m gonna wake up and I’ll be 50, and I’ll still be doin’ this shit. And that’s all right. That’s fine. I mean, you’re sittin’ on a winnin’ lottery ticket. And you’re too much of a pussy to cash it in, and that’s bullshit. ‘Cause I’d do fuckin’ anything to have what you got. So would any of these fuckin’ guys. It’d be an insult to us if you’re still here in 20 years. Hangin’ around here is a fuckin’ waste of your time.”

4.  The End of the Fucking World - “It’s strange. A lot of the time you don’t register the important moments as they happen. You only see that they were important when you look back.”

5. A Monster Calls - “It’s okay that you’re angry. I’m angry too, and if you need to break things, by god you break them. I wish I had 100 years, 100 years I could give to you.”

ok those are all masterpieces if ur ever stuck on smth to watch i recommend these SDFGHFGJ

16. describe your ideal fantasy outfitaa honESTLY. big chunky ass boots. big chunky ass jacket. big chunky ass bag or belt with weapons and cute little satchels of herbs and whatnot. and a big fuckin floofy dress that is SUPER fancy almost like a wedding dress but it can be like a different colour than plain white. hell yeah !!

22. tell us, in detail, about a curse a witch would put on you.i guess a curse references something i Dont want to happen? bc a lot of the things that ppl might view as curses id actually love (dont mind me im still dying @ that “may your womb be barren” thing). but in terms of smth i dont want i guess an easy one would be that id never experience true content. true satisfaction. true peace.

26. tell us about an experience you’ve had that seemed unreal or supernatural. (doesn’t have to be scary)i didnt have a Lot happen to me? i guess every time i have a recurring dream, or like. dreaming about something and then experiencing it irl? i think i rly believe in dream symbolism idk how it works at All but i rly do think its got like.. some reflection onto your own personal state. the only thing i can think of rn is when once i had a dream that i wasnt myself, and i kept changing parts of myself, like cutting my hair or later turning into some weird mermaid creature (sfhfgj) but like. in that dream there was a lot of children. children in school around me. children on a beach. a baby drowning. a child curled up in a fridge. and these two children, one of whom came up to me with a fuckin Horse of all things and went “do u want penis?” and im like “what” and shes like “my horse :) this is my horse, penis” and im like Odd name but ok and i didnt reply to the kid. anyway that morning i woke up and looked into dream symbolism and children and babies stand for a part of yourself youre neglecting, and horses stand for hm. “  male sexual energy and masculinity”. anyway thats how i found out i was trans GDFHJGH

SORRY FOR WRITING SO MUCH IM RLY EXCITED AND I LOVE TALKING!! THANKS !