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nofomogirl · 6 months

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Good Omen's problem with having two canons

They're fundamentally different. That's the problem. That's my point.

For quite a while I focused almost exclusively on the new season of Good Omens, but now I am slowly delving into analysis that takes the entire show into account, and I've encountered a little obstacle. Namely, things from S1 can be really tricky to interpret.

Fair warning: this post is going to zig-zag between various points but I want you to trust me and take this scenic route with me. It will take us somewhere eventually, I promise.

The Arrangement

It's one of the core elements in the Good Omens universe and at the same time a perfect example of the issue I want to discuss. So let's have a closer look together.

In the book, the Arrangement is presented to us in two passages:

the first one, where it is first - very briefly - mentioned:

and the second one, where it is properly introduced and explained:

The Arrangement was very simple, so simple in fact, that it didn't really deserve the capital letter, which it had got for simply being in existence for so long. It was the sort of sensible arrangement that many isolated agents, working in awkward conditions a long way from their superiors, reach with their opposite number when they realize they have more in common with their immediate opponents than their remote allies. It meant a tacit non-interference in certain of each other's activities. It made certain that while neither really won, also neither really lost, and both were able to demonstrate to their masters the great strides they were making against a cunning and well-informed adversary. (...) And then, of course, it had seemed even natural that they should, as it were, hold the fort for one another whenever common sense dictated. Both were of angel stock, after all. If one was going to Hull for a quick temptation, it made sense to nip across the city and carry out a standard brief moment of divine ecstasy. It'd get done anyway, and being sensible about it gave everyone more free time and cut down on expenses.

In the show, the Arrangement is presented to us in two original scenes in the cold opening of S1E3:

(I am quoting most relevant dialogues only)

537 AD, Wessex:

C: So we're both working very hard in damp places and just canceling each other out? A: Well, you could put it like that. It is a bit damp. C: Be easier if we both stayed home. If we just send messages back to our head offices saying we'd done everything they'd asked for, wouldn't it? A: But that would be lying. C: Eh, possibly, but the end result would be the same. Cancel each other out. A: But my dear fellow... well, they'd check. Michael's a bit of a stickler. You don't want to get Gabriel upset with you. C: Oh, our lot have better things to do than verifying compliance reports from Earth. As long as they get paperwork they seem happy enough. As long as you're being seen doing something every now and again. A: No! Absolutely not! I am shocked that you would even imply such a thing. We're not having that conversation, not another word!

1601 AD, The Globe Theatre:

A: I have to be in Edinburgh at the end of the week. A couple of blessings to do. A minor miracle to perform. (...) C: I'm meant to be heading to Edinburgh too this week. Tempting a clan leader to steal some cattle. A: Doesn't sound like hard work. C: That's why I thought we should... Well, bit of a waste of effort, both of us going all the way to Scotland. A: You cannot actually be suggesting what I infer that you are implying. C: Which is? A: That just one of us goes to Edingburgh, does both. The blessing and the tempting. C: We've done it before. Dozens of times now. The Arrangement- A: Don't say that! C: Our respective offices don't actually care how things get done. They just want to know they can cross it off the list.

S2 doesn't actually reference the Arrangement. But it does reuse the dialogue about free will where the 1020 date is dropped. We will get back to it.

The challenge of adapting Good Omens

Good Omens shares a certain characteristic with all of Terry Pratchett's solo books I've read - it couldn't care less about "showing instead of telling". Which I love, just to be clear. A book is a written medium. It's made with words and one of words' major strengths is that you can use them to just tell things point blanc.

Good Omens does it a lot and it's fantastic.

Look at that second passage from the book I quoted earlier.

From just those few sentences we learn a lot about the relationships between:

Heaven and Hell (opponents and competition)

Aziraphale and Crowley (two individuals in the same position and in direct contact with each other)

Aziraphale/Crowley and Heaven/Hell (field agent and a remote HQ that are not in direct contact)

Aziraphale/Crowley and Earth (two individuals and a space they live in)

Heaven/Hell and Earth (a board where the game is played, only winning or losing matters, what actually happens on a board does not)

It's really an extra condensed worldbuilding gem sprinkled with humor, so it's no surprise it's become one of the most iconic passages from the book.

I mean, just browse through some interviews with David and Michael - especially the ones from 2019 - where they explain what Aziraphale and Crowley are about. You'll be hard-pressed to find any where they don't reference that specific paragraph, consciously or otherwise.

But it's only this neat on the pages of the book, where narration like this takes mere seconds to absorb. It's impossible to convey the same information in a visual medium with anywhere near the same efficiency.

The fact that the majority of Good Omens is like this was, in my opinion, a main challenge the adaptation faced. The book is very narration-heavy. It's full of fun facts about characters, side jokes, hilarious comments, etc. Some of that precious material was salvaged by introducing God as a narrator, but there was only so much of it you could squeeze into a TV show. The rest had to either be fit into dialogues or lost in translation from the written medium to the visual one.

Obviously, in the case of the Arrangement, it was the dialogues.

Book canon and show canon

We all know they're not the same. Neil Gaiman also pointed it out several times. But I think our mistake is that we still tend to think about them as complementary.

Look at the Arrangement again. The show canon seems to merely expand on the book canon. Add extra details and fill in the blanks. The Arrangement works the exact same way, except now we also know more about how it started.

If we compile what we know from the book with what we know from the show, we get a more detailed timeline:

Crowley first proposes the Arrangement in 537 (show).

The Arrangement starts in 1020 (book), ie. Aziraphale finally agrees to it (show - deduction); we don't know for sure if it's a "basic version" (not getting in each other's way), or a "full version" (doing each other's jobs) but we can assume it's the former.

In 1601 "full version" of the Arrangement is in place for some time (they've done it dozens of times) but Aziraphale still objects and needs convincing.

But read that description from a book once more.

Does it really fit into the version of events shown in the TV series?

The Arrangement in the book is something that just happened. A natural, and in a way inevitable result of Aziraphale and Crowley's circumstances. We are never told who came up with it first because it doesn't matter. Because it could have been either of them. Because after five millennia on Earth, they were both ready to do it. They were both of the same mind. For all we know it might have been an unspoken agreement all along!

But for the show, the creators had to come up with a good reason for the Arrangement to be discussed out loud. And what could be a more natural situation for someone to describe and explain an idea than trying to sell that idea to someone else?

For that practical reason - among many others, no doubt - the Arrangement is not only explicitly Crowley's idea, but an idea Aziraphale vehemently rejects at first. He needs to be convinced and even when he finally relents he's never entirely comfortable with it. He keeps objecting and it requires Crowley's constant effort for them to keep cooperating in any way.

The fact that Aziraphale is reluctant gives Crowley a perfect reason to keep convincing him ie. talk about the Arrangement. But the fact that he needs to explain and keep convincing Aziraphale means that Aziraphale is no longer a person who understands the same things and feels the same way.

That is a huge change.

Of course, you may say that what I've written about the Arrangement in the book is just my interpretation. It's true that technically there's nothing there that would contradict the events from the show in any way. The thing is, the events in the show aren't very compatible with the overall characterization of the ineffable duo in the book.

Evolution of Aziraphale and Crowley

You might have read that our leading pair was originally conceived as a single character that Neil and Terry eventually decided to split into two separate individuals.

My reaction when I first learned about it was: "Of course they were! That makes so much sense!" Because honestly, as a person who watched the show first and then read the book, I was surprised at how few differences there were between the two in the original text. If you squint your eyes really tight, you can see how book!Aziraphale and book!Crowley are two versions of the same character. They're far more similar than their show versions.

Most importantly, their attitudes toward Heaven and Hell are pretty much identical. Perfectly mirrored in every regard. What Hell is for Crowley, Heaven is for Aziraphale. What Hell is for Aziraphale, Heaven is for Crowley. In. Every. Possible. Way.

Allow me to present some evidence from the book.

Exhibit #1: the end of the scene where Crowley convinces Aziraphale to interfere with Warlock's upbringing

'You're saying the child isn't evil of itself?' he said slowly. 'Potentially evil. Potentially good too, I suppose. Just this huge powerful potentiality, waiting to be shaped,' said Crowley. He shrugged. 'Anyway, why're we talking about this good and evil? They're just names for sides. We know that.' 'I suppose it's got to be worth a try,' said the angel. Crowley nodded encouragingly. 'Agreed?' said the demon, holding out his hand. The angel shook it, cautiously. 'It'll certainly be more interesting than saints,' he said. 'And it'll be for the child's own good, in the long run,' said Crowley. (...)

When Crowley first points out that good and evil are just names for sides, and then insists it's something they both know, Aziraphale doesn't react in any way. That's because these aren't things that book!Aziraphale disagrees with. He does indeed know it and doesn't deny it.

Also, please note just how cynical the angel is here with his comment that influencing the Antichrist would be a more interesting project than influencing saints!

Both would be rather OOC for show!Aziraphale.

Exhibit #2: the scene just after Warlock Dowling's birthday party, when it becomes evident he is not the Antichrist

'You said it was him!' moaned Aziraphale (...) 'It was him,' said Crowley. (...) 'Then someone else must be interfering.' 'There isn't anyone else! There's just us, right? Good and Evil. One side or the other.' He thumped the steering wheel. 'You'll be amazed at the kind of things they can do to you, down there,' he said. 'I imagine they're very similar to the sort of things they can do to you up there,' said Aziraphale. 'Come off it. Your lot get ineffable mercy,' said Crowley sourly. 'Yes? Did you ever visit Gomorrah?' 'Sure' said the demon. 'There was this great little tavern where you could get these terrific fermented date-palm cocktails with nutmeg and crushed lemongrass-' 'I meant afterwards.' 'Oh.'

Can you imagine this kind of exchange in the TV series? Can you imagine show!Aziraphale being this realistic about Heaven, and show!Crowley so naive about it? There's no way.

Show!Aziraphale genuinely believes that Heaven is good at its core.

Book!Aziraphale knows Heaven isn't any different than Hell and would punish him just as ruthlessly and unfairly as Hell would Crowley.

Show!Crowley understands both Heaven and Hell on a very deep level and is highly aware of their true nature.

Book!Crowley buys a piece of celestial propaganda about ineffable mercy and actually expects Heaven to be forgiving.

Let the magnitude of that difference sink.

Exhibit #3: same scene, a bit further

'So all we've got to do is find it,' said Crowley. 'Go through the hospital records.' The Bentley's engine coughed into life and the car leapt forward, forcing Aziraphale back into the seat. 'And then what?' he said. 'And then we find the child.' 'And then what?' The angel shut his eyes as the car crabbed around the corner. 'Don't know.' 'Good grief.' 'I suppose (...) your people wouldn't consider (...) giving me asylum?' 'I was going to ask you the same thing. (...)'

This is just a cherry on top, really.

Yes, in the book, when things go pear-shaped, both Aziraphale and Crowley consider seeking asylum on the opposite side.

Do you need more proof that book canon and show canon really aren't as compatible as they may seem?

Free will

As promised, let's get back to that dialogue because while it may not be obvious at first glance it really illustrates perfectly the problem arising from balancing between two canons.

Here is the full quote from the book:

Aziraphale had tried to explain [free will] to him once. The whole point, he'd said - this was somewhere around 1020, when they'd first reached their little Arrangement - the whole point was that when a human was good or bad it was because they wanted to be. Whereas people like Crowley and, of course, himself, were set in their ways right from the start. People couldn't become truly holy, he said, unless they also had the opportunity to be definitively wicked. Crowley had thought about it for some time and, around about 1023, had said, Hang on, that only works, right, if you start everyone off equal, OK? You can't start someone off in a muddy shack in the middle of a war zone and expect them to do as well as someone born in a castle. Ah, Aziraphale had said, that's the good bit. The lower you start, the more opportunities you have. Crowley had said, That's lunatic. No, said Aziraphale, it's ineffable.

And here, for comparison, is how it was reused in S2E3:

A: There is a stolen body in that barrel! This is wicked! C: Oh, I'm down with wicked! Anyway, is it wicked? She needed the money. A: That is irrelevant. Look, I am good. You, I'm afraid, are evil. But people get a choice. You know, they cannot be truly holy unless they also get the opportunity to be wicked. She is wicked. C: Yeah, that only works if you start everyone off equal. You can't start someone off like that and expect her to do as well as someone born in a castle. A: Ah, but no, no. That's the good bit. The lower you start, the more opportunities you have. So Elspeth here has all the opportunities because she's so poor. C: That's lunacy. A: No, that's ineffable.

I'll be honest with you - I didn't like that scene in the show. It felt jarring and off. Aziraphale was acting like it was his first day on Earth and it was frustrating to watch.

Then, on one of the rewatches, just as I was rolling my eyes at "that's ineffable", a bulb lit in my brain. That line didn't work there because it wasn't created to be there! In the book and in S1 "it's ineffable" was kind of Aziraphale's catchphrase but in S2 it only appears this once. More importantly, in the book and S1, the fact that the angel would say that was all a build-up to the scene when he threw it in Heaven's face at the Tadfield Airbase. Using that word in S2 was like trying to make a running joke that has already reached its destination run again.

And just like that one line the entire dialogue didn't fit because it wasn't meant to be there. It was created for an entirely different context.

What's the difference?

Firstly, book!husbands' conviction was very shallow and it wasn't uncommon for both of them to spout slogans without meaning them. Therefore, book!Aziraphale's words didn't carry that much weight. The very fact that the conversation took place at the same time they formed the Arrangement tells us something about how serious he was. But show!Aziraphale's relationship with his beliefs is different, so when he says things like that it's a much bigger deal.

Secondly, the book explicitly states that Aziraphale and Crowley only developed free will on Earth, due to extended exposure to mankind. The show never really makes a stand on the matter but based on what we've seen so far I think we can safely assume that angels and demons are capable of making their own choices as much as humans do.

In other words, in its original context, the conversation was just Aziraphale talking about a concept he didn't fully grasp, quoting propaganda he didn't fully subscribe to. He was being ignorant and mildly obnoxious in an endearing way.

But using the same dialogue verbatim in the Resurrectionist carried a completely different meaning. Aziraphale who utters it in the show has no reason to be so ignorant about free will. Aziraphale who utters it in the show genuinely tries to defend Heaven. Most importantly, Aziraphale who utters it in the show, doesn't just idly bicker with his friend about general things but is judging an actual human individual that's right in front of them. That, more than anything else, makes it sound heartless and ignorant.

What is the problem with having two canons, exactly?

It's time to wrap things up.

In the opening paragraphs, I've mentioned that I've noticed the issue while interpreting scenes from S1, and yes, that was the case and I do believe that the existence of two canons is especially problematic for S1. That's because pretty much every scene in S1 is potentially like that dialogue about free will in S2, except subtler and harder to spot.

A grand majority of what we see and hear in S1 comes directly from the book. But while words and actions were kept, in some instances things that gave them their original meaning might no longer be valid in the show universe. Sometimes they easily take new meaning, and we don't even notice. But sometimes there's this dissonance that's not as easy to work around.

S1 deviated from the book and created its own canon. But the difference didn't seem to go very deep and it seemed perfectly reasonable to use some trivia from the book to shed some extra light on the content of the show. I used to do it in my head, even though I was aware of the changes that were made.

But S2 expanded the show canon so far beyond what was in the book that I'm really not sure it makes sense to compile them anymore.

There are a lot of things that were only explicitly stated in the book that I keep clinging to. But perhaps it's time to let go...

Thank you for your patience.

I know all of the above isn't exactly a revolutionary discovery, but I needed to get it off my chest before writing anything else.

#good omens #good omens 2 #crowley #aziraphale #ineffable husbands #good omens the book #differences between book and show #very long post #things I needed to get off my chest

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snowblack-charcoalwhite · 5 months

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There are quite a few things that worry me A LOT about the way Aegon`s character has been written in HotD so far. And one of them is that the show seems to keep pushing the audience towards comparing him to Joffrey Baratheon.

From being the firstborn son of the king to being grossly unfit to rule (there`s hope for Aegon in that department but still), from heavily hinting at Aegon`s supposed sadistic inclinations and lack of empathy to this:

(in both cases the slap was given for disrespecting (a) female character(s) in a sexual context), from Sapochnik and Condal stating that Joffrey is the closest one to Aegon among GOT characters to putting TGC and Jack Gleeson (who I have absolutely nothing against, by the way - in fact I have nothing but respect for him given the quality of his performance and the way he makes and defends his life choices) in an event together- it`s quite clear what they are trying to sell.

And the saddest part is that it`s working. TGC had to address the 'dragon Joffrey' allegations multiple times. "He is not an out-and-out psychopath. He's much more complex. His decisions are due to insecurities and confusion and rage". "...he's a confused, tangled mess of a man who doesn't yet know himself". The writers did their job so well that all this had to be spelled out to the viewers by the actor.

Aegon can be cruel, yes. But, firstly, he`s not only cruel to others but, first and foremost, to himself; and, secondly, his cruelty is not his defining trait. He doesn`t take pleasure in tormenting people, not really. In all actuality, he`s arguably the most tormented of them all.

We can only hope that season 2 will bring at least some nuance and positive development to Aegon`s character - and that Tom will continue to give his all to show the audience his different facets. And that the audience will want to see them through the veil of bias and stereotypes.

Edit (spoilers): it`s just hit me what these characters do have in common, and it`s cause of death. The comparisons are going to get even wilder, specifically from the Black part of the fandom.

#hotd critical #aegon ii targaryen #tom glynn carney

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scoobydoodean · 5 months

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what’s your opinion on “lebanon”? as it actually is in the show and how fans/fic writers interpret/approach it.

cause i’ve been binge-reading “lebanon” fics and i’ve noticed two patterns: sam might argue with john or he stays calm but regardless he preaches to dean about what a terrible father john was, and dean always falls back into his performing and just keeps defending john. now i love all that angst, really i love it so much, these fics are phenomenally written… but i’m just wondering if i’m crazy to think that dean wouldn’t actually fall back into that role to such an extent, and whether the episode actually kinda got it right by having dean feel secure with his family as it is. iirc my issue with the episode is that neither dean nor sam got to express any issues with john in an honest but civil way (and that john is too nice) but that still i liked dean’s expression of security, but tbh it’s been awhile since i last watched it so maybe i’m missing/misremembering smth… thanks!

One of the strangest things I see in fandom is how many people's sense of how Sam views John versus how Dean views John is just flat out wrong. The idea that Dean is always defending John while Sam is always criticizing him the whole show is negated over and over and over in the actual show itself—extremely overtly.

There's two issues here in my mind that lend to this fandom problem.

The fandom accepting Sam and Dean's "John Narratives" at face value in the early episodes of season 1. For example, watching 1.08 "Bugs", where Dean claims to have no resentments toward John and says Sam also was a dick during Sam and John's fight, and going, "Well there we go. Dean has no resentments and refuses to criticize John but Sam will." At this point, we already know from 1.06 "Skin" that Dean does have resentments toward John for not appearing to care about him and for abandoning him, and we get further indications in 1.11, and 1.21 in this season alone. Another example is Sam and Dean's clashes in 1.10 "Asylum" and in 1.11 "Scarecrow", which are largely analyzed by the fandom as moments where Dean is blindly following orders when they have some other, better option Sam is pushing, and Dean is just refusing to go along with Sam's much better ideas because he's too focused on believing their dad knows best... when that is not actually what is happening at all. Sam's alternative plans in the beginning of 1.10 and 1.11 are absolutely stupid. In 1.10, he wants to call the FBI on John to find him. That's his big idea—instead of following the coordinates John just sent them and seeing if he's there. In 1.11, Sam's big bright idea on finding John is to abandon some people to die on a time-sensitive case so he can go search all of Sacramento for John with nothing but an area code. His plans are dumb, plain and simple—and while we do see Dean hiding his own resentments in these episodes too, that does not remain true—which brings me to the other issue here.

Fandom doesn't leave room for the brothers perspectives on John and their outward expressions of those perspectives to shift or mature over the series. This is particularly funny because their perspectives are literally swapping over the course of season 1, and have pretty much fully swapped by 2.02.

Sam's shifting season 1 perspective on John

What actually happens in season 1, is that Sam, who starts out burning with resentment and hurt toward John for disowning him and being a smothering drill sergeant and absent, binge-drinking dad, slowly begins empathizing him because he's now suffered a similar trauma and is having extreme difficulty coping with it himself! Sam's empathy for and understanding of John (and hell—even respect for John handling it as well as Sam thinks he was capable) is already beginning to show in 1.02—where Sam asks Dean "How does Dad do it?" (i.e., deal with the same burning rage and desperation for vengeance that is tearing Sam apart) (gifset). In 1.04, he learns John was bragging about Sam's accomplishments to other people (gifset). In 1.08, when Dean tells Sam that John was never actually disappointed in him—that he was scared Sam would get hurt if he wasn't around (gifset here) a lot of Sam's anger about the Stanford fight fades. He ends the episode saying "Dad did the best he could" (a repeated quote often misattributed as coming more from Dean) and saying he wants to find him to apologize to him for the things he said (gifset). John and Sam share a heartfelt, tearful hug in 1.16—at the end of which Sam begs John not to leave, and in 1.20, John himself apologizes and explains what was going on in his head when they fought, and it ends with them smiling and laughing as they acknowledge they understand each other and they're the same. I track Sam and John's relationship through the tag, #we probably have a lot more in common than just about anyone because Sam says that during that conversation in 1.20 (gifset).

Dean's shifting season 1 perspective on John

At the same time this shift is happening in Sam, we see Dean going the exact opposite direction. He starts out believing John has their best interest at heart even if they don't understand his actions, but the resentment is there too (1.06). In 1.09 and in 1.12, Dean needs help desperately, and John doesn't answer. While Sam is learning that John actually cares about him, Dean is growing more and more concerned that John doesn't care about him (Dean) specifically. We see this resentment start to come out (season 1 compilation set here) in 1.20, when John says he wants to keep the boys safe and that's why he's ditching them, and Dean calls it "A bunch of crap". Dean begins standing up to John to his face from this episode onward—finishing 1.20 with a "Yeah well we saved your ass" in response to John saying they disobeyed him. In 1.21, John tries to get on his case, and Dean lays into him about not answering the phone and specifically about abandoning Dean when Dean needed him in 1.09 and 1.12. In 1.22, Sam tries to get his way by telling Dean that John wouldn't want them to bring The Colt to save him, and Dean yells "I don't care what Dad wants!" and then when Sam starts throwing the blame on him for everything, Dean says,

Well, you and Dad are a lot more alike than I thought, you know that? You both can’t wait to sacrifice yourself for this thing. But you know what? I’m gonna be the one to bury you. You’re selfish, you know that? You don’t care about anything but revenge.

Dean has compared Sam and John more than once during the series, and it has never ever been a compliment.

Sam and Dean in the rest of the series

Sam and Dean's interactions about John in rest of the series are... almost universally the opposite of what the fanfics you've picked up suggest. Their interactions almost always show Dean criticizing John and Sam keeping silent or defending him, or reiterating that John did what he had to/the best he could.

Gifset on Dean's whole season 2 "Fuck John Winchester" vibe here.

In 2.01, Dean shouts at John for (it appears) abandoning him to die:

DEAN Come on, Dad. You've gotta help me. I've gotta get better, I've gotta get back in there. I mean, you haven't called a soul for help. You haven't even tried. Aren't you going to do anything? Aren't you even going to say anything? I've done everything you have ever asked me. Everything. I have given everything I've ever had. And you're just going to sit there and you're going to watch me die? I mean, what the hell kind of father are you?

Sam and John have a horrible fight where John blames him for Dean's condition and Sam tells him to go to Hell only for him to make a demon deal and literally go to Hell that same day (gifset) and Sam tries to start another fight right before John dies but John refuses to engage (gifset). The result ends up being that Sam and Dean have fully swapped places on John by 2.02 with John's death as the catalyst. John's death leaves Sam with regrets that their last interaction was Sam trying to start a fight (2.02). He decides he wants to hunt in John's memory (2.02) (gifset1, gifset2) while a part of Dean desperately wants to quit the life altogether—he's clawing the walls but feels helplessly trapped (2.09, 2.10, 2.20).

Sam defends John while Dean suggests John lead them down the wrong path with a dogmatic rule book (2.03). He demands they go to Lawrence so he can place John's dog tags over Mary's grave (2.04). He spends the season regurgitating John's orders, pushing Dean to do what John told him to do (2.11, 2.14, 2.20) while Dean wants to quit the life (2.09, 2.10, 2.20) and burns with anger toward John. In 2.10, Dean says "I wish to god he'd never opened his mouth!" about John.

In 2.11 "Playthings":

SAM (shoving DEAN to face him) Dean! Dad told you to do it, you have to. DEAN Yeah, well, Dad's an ass! (SAM frowns in confusion) He never should have said anything! I mean, you don't do that, you don't, you don't lay that kind of crap on your kids! SAM No. He was right to say it! Who knows what I might become? Even now, everyone around me dies!

We see Dean seething with resentment while Sam defends John's orders and tries to enforce them on Dean, carrying the legacy of their father in more ways than one.

Over and over, we get indications that a part of John treated Dean as disposable while he sheltered Sam, and that Dean is increasingly aware of the impact that's difference has had on him—to the point he realizes his father's neglect and abuse is the reason he isn't fighting to save himself in 3.10 "Dream A Little Dream Of Me". Dean and John's relationship is intentionally paralleled with a physically abusive relationship between a father and son in this same episode (gifset, meta), and in this episode, Dean rejects his father as an "obsessed bastard", calls Bobby his father (gifset), and decides from this point forward, he's going to fight to save himself from his demon deal because fuck John Winchester.

DREAM DEAN Dad knew who you really were. A good soldier and nothing else. Daddy's blunt little instrument. Your own father didn't care whether you lived or died. Why should you? DEAN Son of a bitch! My father was an obsessed bastard! All that crap he dumped on me, about protecting Sam! That was his crap! He's the one who couldn't protect his family! He– who wasn't there for Sam! I always was! He wasn't fair! I didn't deserve what he put on me! And I don't deserve to go to Hell!

And yeah! Dean also still loves John! And more than that—he craves John's protection. We see this in 3.14 "Long Distance Call" when the Crocotta calls to Dean as John from beyond the grave, telling Dean exactly what Dean wants to hear: "I never wanted this. Never. You're my boy, I love you. I can't watch you to go to hell, Dean," and telling Dean he can save him. This is pure longing for the love and protection Dean has always desired from John but feels like he's never received. Instead, he's always felt disposable.

In season 4? Oh boy... we get this incredible bit in 4.10 between Dean and Anna:

ANNA I was stationed on earth 2,000 years. Just... watching... silent... invisible... out on the road... sick for home... waiting on orders from an unknowable father I can't begin to understand. So don't tell me that -- DEAN laughs. ANNA What is so funny? What? DEAN Nothing. Sorry. It's just...I can relate.

Then in after meeting Adam in 4.19, Sam and Dean have a fight about whether to bring Adam hunting with them or leave him to a normal life:

DEAN 'Hunting is life. You can't have connections.' Dad gave you that exact same speech, remember? It was just before you ditched us for Stanford. You hated Dad for saying that stuff, and now you're quoting him? SAM Yeah, well, turns out Dad was right. DEAN Since when? SAM Since always. Dean, when I look at Adam, you know what I see? DEAN A normal kid. SAM No. Meat. Because the demons and monsters out there, that's all he is. I hated Dad for a long time. I did. But now I think I understand. So we didn't have a dog and a white picket fence. So what? Dad did right by us. He taught us how to protect ourselves. Adam deserves the same. DEAN Listen to yourself, man. SAM You think I’m wrong? DEAN I think it's too late for us. This is our life. This is who we are, okay? And it's fine. I accept that. But with Adam, he's still got a chance, man. He can go to school. He could be a doctor.

Sam says John did right by them. Dean thinks he absolutely didn't, but they can't change who they are now—they can only keep others from falling down the same path.

At the end of the episode? Oh boy...

DEAN You know, I finally get why you and Dad butted heads so much. You two were practically the same person. SAM looks over. DEAN I mean, I worshipped the guy, you know? I dressed like him, I acted like him, I listen to the same music. But you were more like him than I will ever be. And I see that now. SAM I'll take that as a compliment. DEAN You take it any way you want.

It is NOT a compliment.

In 5.16, Dean is confronted with god's intentional absence, and burning with resentment, says to Joshua,

Forget it. Just another dead-beat dad with a bunch of excuses, right. I’m used to that. I’ll muddle through.

In 5.13, Sam takes the opportunity presented to him by young John's presence to defend their father and tell John that he forgives him (gifset).

JOHN Look, how long have you known about this...hunting stuff? SAM Pretty much forever. My dad raised me in it. JOHN You're serious? Who the hell does that to a kid? SAM Well, I mean, for the record, Mary's parents did. JOHN I don't care. You know, what kind of irresponsible bastard lets a child anywhere near—Y-you know, you could've been killed! SAM I, uh...came kind of close. SAM laughs. JOHN The number it must've done on your head...Your father was supposed to protect you. SAM He was trying. He died trying. Believe me. SAM sits down on the bench under a window. SAM I used to be mad at him. I—I mean, I used to... I used to hate the guy. But now I—I... I get it. He was...just doing the best he could. And he was trying to keep it together in—in—in this impossible situation. See... My mom, um... She was amazing, beautiful, and she was the love of his life. And she got killed. And...I think he would have gone crazy if he didn't do something. Truth is, um, my dad died before I got to tell him that I understand why he did what he did. And I forgive him for what it did to us. I do. And I just—I love him.

What Lebanon does is present Sam with the opportunity to reiterate his forgiveness toward a John who understands the context:

SAM Dad… for me? That fight… that was a lifetime ago. I don’t even remember what I said, and – I mean… yeah. You know what? You did some messed-up things. But I don’t… I mean, when I think about you… [voice breaks] and I think about you a lot… I don’t think about our – our fights. I think about you… I think about you on the floor of that hospital. And I think about how I never got to say goodbye. JOHN Sam. Son. I am so sorry. SAM I’m sorry, too. But you did your best, dad. You – you fought for us, and you loved us, and… that’s enough.

So yeah! The fanfic narrative here where Sam is Mr. "Dad was bad" and Dean is Mr. "Nooo dad did the best he could" IS ABSOLUTE NONSENSE!!!!!

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faulty-writes · 8 months

Note

Hii! I apologize if you keep getting notifications from me at such an hour but I cant get enough of your posts! I love the way you write Tenya!

So if I may trouble you just a bit longer…

Since it’s spooky season, what would your take be on vampire Tenya x f (or gn) reader? And vampire Monoma as well?

[ Oh I like trouble, trust me. Haha. Thank you. I swear I get so many compliments regarding how I write Tenya, makes me so proud of myself. One spooky season request coming up! ]

Despite being what many assumed was a "blood-sucking" creature, Tenya had a sense of elegance and self-discipline because of his upbringing. Yes, he was what most would refer to as a "rich kid" but he was not spoiled in any capacity and often adhered to his own rules which included having manners even when thirsty for blood.

Most found Tenya to be intimidating, but you found him intriguing despite initially being unaware of his true nature. The two of you met in a bookstore late at night and you recall the way he stumbled when he rounded the corner of a bookshelf to find you and the way he bowed and said "Pardon, I was unaware there was another frequenting this shop so late at night."

The two of you began to meet frequently at the bookstore after that, and although you thought it peculiar Tenya only requested to meet you at night. You assumed it was because he was busy during the day but in all truth, he was struggling to avoid revealing his true nature to you and feared that once you found out he was a vampire you'd…well you would not want to see him again.

He slipped one night, after pushing himself too far. Yes, self-control was essential. But one could only contain themselves for so long and vampires were particularly dangerous when deprived of blood. "I…I apologize I…I did not wish for you to see me as such a…monster," while initially a shock, you tried to be accepting and understanding of what he was.

Being the person you were, his vampiric world fascinated you, and he didn't hesitate to teach you about the history of his lineage or his nightly rituals which typically included performing a series of prayers, chants, and such before he drank whatever blood he had managed to obtain.

Unfortunately, Tenya also informed you of the dangerous side of his world. Mostly the rogue vampires who strayed from the societal rules of their world and killed or injured humans during their bloodlust. "I promise, I will not allow harm to come to you. Ensuring your safety is quite a priority." Yes…he would go to whatever lengths he needed to ensure you remained by his side.

To double ensure your safety, Tenya presented you with gifts frequently. Usually, these consisted of protective charms, blessed holy water, and amulets that were believed to ward off bad supernatural threats. Of course, he would never tell you the hoops he had to go through to get such gifts.

Sometimes it was hard to keep up with Tenya's schedule considering he was more active at night. But he assured you that he enjoyed your company and often insisted that you could rest when you appeared extremely tired. Waking up in his bed or falling asleep against his shoulder became a frequent occurrence for you.

His parents were hesitant to accept you and your growing relationship with their son. On the other hand, his brother, Tensei welcomed you with open arms. "It's awesome that my little bro finally found someone! And just to let you know, it doesn't matter if you're human, another vampire, or even a witch. I believe that people who look past such things are the coolest!" It was safe to assume that Tenya got his beliefs from Tensei.

"I believe with enough effort, we may eliminate the prejudice that separates our societies to coexist together in harmony," one of Tenya's deepest wishes was to break the barriers between his and your kind. Although he had not intended to feel affection for you, he did. Yet, he looked at it as the first step to uniting your kind as he dreamed.

Neito, unfortunately, was out of blood and sought to get it fresh from an unsuspecting human. That human happened to be you and he was only attracted to you because of the intoxicating scent of your blood. However, he quickly found that you were not a frail human and stood your ground far more than he expected.

While some would be embarrassed, Neito remained his ignorant self after realizing you were quite the troublesome individual. "How dare you reject me! I am Neito Monoma, and I demand you provide me with your blood!" As far as you were concerned, underneath his vampiric nature was nothing more than a spoiled child and you were prepared to discipline him as needed.

He continued to stalk you, despite finding alternative blood donors because as much as he hated to admit it, he found you intriguing. For a human that is, and used his sharp wit accompanied by playful banter whenever you caught him in his stalking efforts. "Surely you didn't think I'd leave you alone, oh no my dear, quite the opposite. I do not stop until I get what I want and what I want is your blood," and your affection, but he kept that to himself.

Your opinion of him didn't change until you were attacked by another one of his kind. Your guard was down initially because you had mistaken them for Neito, and despite your skills, you were losing the fight until he showed up and saved you. He'd be damned if he let another taste your blood before he got the chance to.

You detested the idea of letting him finally drink from you but considering his courageous actions. You allowed him the opportunity and found that he was surprisingly gentle when feeding from you. "Surely you didn't compare me to such monsters as that rouge one who attempted to take what is mine, how insulting. I pride myself in presentation and manners," he stated, acting just a touch too offended.

Despite not letting many people in, the two of you continued to spend time together, and Neito began to reveal his past. How he came from a high-class family, their rather…unbelievable expectations of him, and how he wishes to break free and prove his own worth to the world. Of course, that was a challenge given the current state of discrimination toward his kind, but he was still determined to do whatever he could to make his dream come true.

He finds himself feeling peaceful when in your presence and this was new to him and something that gave him a sense of belonging. It was almost as if being in your presence kept his demons at bay and he partially wondered if you wore any protection symbols or amulets on your person.

On occasion, Neito would still struggle with the affection he felt for you and his nature. Vampires were strong, drank blood, and didn't hesitate to do what they wanted to obtain said blood. But even though he knew you would allow him to drink from you. He found that he didn't want to cause you any harm and thus the conflict continued but he kept this a secret from you.

Eventually, Neito agreed to allow you to meet his family. Although it was immediately apparent, they detested you merely because you were human and spoke ill of Neito for befriending and furthermore feeling the way he did toward you. "Humans are meant to be our food source, nothing more," they said which caused Neito to argue with them before ultimately dragging you out the door.

Despite your unusual relationship, Neito viewed it as fulfilling his commitment to protect and cherish you for as long as you lived, and from what he understood, that was for a short time. He planned to propose to turn you but decided to wait to bring that up. For now, he'd enjoy your company.

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jellycrusher · 7 months

Text

Wolves and Lambs: Part 2

Alpha Max Verstappen x Omega fem!driver

Genre: Series, Omega verse, Enemies to Lovers, Romance, Eventual smut

Synopsis: Male Alphas are the ones who dominate motor sports all around the world, especially Formula 1. It is a well known fact. Females in general nor Female Omegas are never heard nor encouraged to join the sport since the 1950s. Well, up until now...

Word Count: 4.5k

Chapter's Premise: "It's easier this way. To hide it from everyone. Being a female alone made it hard for me to enter this sport and rise at this level. If the public knew I was a female Omega, my career is over. No team would give me a contract."

Taglist: @laura-naruto-fan1998 @fanboyluvr @giffywiffy3408 @notyouraveragemochii @cmleitora

Parts: W&L masterlist / general masterlist

In this society that we now live in, there are three "types" of humans.

The most common one, which also makes up 90% of the population are the Betas.

Then, there are Alphas, they're said to have superior characteristics which make them great leaders. Which is why most of the successful athletes are usually Alphas.

And lastly, a class that is even rarer than alphas, the Omegas. One of the pecularities of Omegas is that they constantly release a sweet scent, what we call pheromones. These affect mainly Alphas and lures them. During their heat, the pheromones they produce will be much stronger and will be more luring to Alphas.

One can take medicines to control their pheromones, especially during their heat period. Suppressants can be taken by Omegas. Alphas can also take them if they wish not to be affected by any Omega in heat.

Society has indeed taken it in to protect Omegas because of their special constitution. Sadly, there are a lot of people who thinks that Omegas are inferior and are only good for mating.

Just because someone is an Omega, it doesn't mean that someone isn't meant for greatness ahead.

It was horrifying to think that your career is now ruined when it hasn't even started yet. You choke on your own saliva, making you cough so loud that a few heads turn in your direction. You fiddle with your fingers when you closed the book. Oscar quickly noticed the panic in your voice and in your body language.

"Oh no, don't worry. I'm an Omega, as well. I thought this was public knowledge?" Oh right, bugger me, I wasn't paying attention to Megan when she told me the names of the two Omegas on the grid. You looked at Oscar with a puzzled look and he quickly adds, "Good thing that the venue was swimming with Alphas. Our smell won't really affect anyone. But you? You didn't smell of anything at all. Maybe a hint of sweetness but nothing too obvious. There were a few Omegas at the event so I think the other drivers didn't suspect you."

Realization hits you. You pull out your phone from your pocket and opened the calendar. "I must've missed my suppressants. I was so busy with pre-season testing, the gala, and extra training. That can't happen again."

Wondering if only Oscar was the one who noticed your peculiar scent. It's scary to think that if maybe somebody else has caught you, you won't even be able to continue as a driver for your team.

"It's easier this way. To hide it from everyone. Being a female alone made it hard for me to enter this sport and rise at this level. If the public knew I was a female Omega, my career is over. No team would give me a contract." You confess.

"Well, that's true. It took a lot of convincing before my teams in F3 and F2 trusted me. We had to work twice or thrice as hard to prove to people that we' can deliver the same results as others, if not better." Oscar leans back on the couch, arms sprawled on the backrest. "Besides, my heat doesn't affect my performance anymore. Not since I met Lando."

"What d'you mean?"

"Lando's my mate. I don't get intense heat ruts anymore since he gave me my mark. One time I drove through a GP when my heat came. That was scary, I almost crashed." he says, amused when you got visibly surprised at the revelation.

You felt relaxed that he was able to confess this information with you even if you just met for the first time during the gala. Maybe he was just trying to comfort you when your secret was discovered by him.

"Please don't tell Lando just yet. You didn't, right?" you ask. Oscar shaking his head at your question.

"I kinda have a responsibility to take care of you now. It's not my place to tell anybody. In our line of work, nothing stays a secret so I guess you'll tell who you'll want to tell at the right time." Oscar leans forward to you, gently placing his hand on your shoulder. "Don't worry, your secret's safe with me. We stick together."

"What secret?" You jump at the familiar voice. Lando pops up behind you two.

"Nothing. She's just telling me which of the drivers she finds cute." Oscar stand up from his seat and guides Lando to the direction of the restaurant.

"I bet it's me, right?" Lando points to himself. Oscar gently punched the side of Lando. They waved goodbye and disappeared into the restaurant.

It wasn't much of a calm air to make you continue reading your book in the lounge. Despite Oscar making you calm even after your conversation, you were still worried. You needed to let out some steam.

When you came up to your room, you took a suppressant and changed into your workout clothes. You arrived at the empty hotel gym and started pretty quickly on the treadmill.

If you weren't a race car driver, no one would bat an eye if they thought you were a track and field athlete at how fast you were going through that treadmill. Your music blasting through your headphones on maximum level when you didn't notice two men entering the gym.

You were breathing too hard through your mouth to even notice the waft of Alpha scent coming from the two men. They were cheerfully chatting and joking when they took notice of you aggressively running on the treadmill. Surprised at the unsettling scent you were giving off. You were angry, very angry.

They chose the two empty machines at either side of you. Careful to not disturb you, they quietly took their place and slowly started running.

Once you got all the frustration off your mind, you pressed a few buttons on the machine to slow it down. You take a moment to catch your breath but not long after, your nose twitched at the strongest Alpha scent you've ever smelled your entire life.

You try to hold your breath and cover your nose with one hand but that didn't help. You didn't know where it even came from. It's so strong that it's starting to make you sick and dizzy. Your limbs felt like jelly and your throat was getting dry. No scent has had this kind of effect on you before. The music blasting in your ears is not helping any bit so you yank it off.

"Hey!" Shocked at the unexpected voice, you shriek and tripped on the treadmill. Good thing it was running very slow that you weren't hurt when you amusingly slid off the machine. The man quickly paused his machine and yours, then ran to help you. "Are you okay?"

You recognized him to be Charles Leclerc. The other half of the driver pair of Ferrari. He offered his hand out to help you stand. You got a bit too close to him as you rise from the floor. You can't help but sniff him inconspicuously. He had a strong Alpha scent, similar to the one you smelled earlier but not entirely the same. The effect it has on you was not as powerful as earlier. Maybe what you've smelled was a mixture of scents? You're not entirely sure.

"Surprised you're a driver with that kind of a reaction with just a hello from Charles. Wonder how you'll do at the track." You turn on your heels at the sound of an arrogant voice behind you, and saw Max Verstappen still very much running and have not batted an eye when you fell.

"I..." You step forward in annoyance, almost about to snap back at him but your feet quickly froze. You recognize the smell. It's coming from Max. The golden boy of Red Bull. The man who dominated all of the drivers last season, and who had broken and topped a lot of records.

The salty taste of fear lingered on your lips. Your muscles screamed at you to leave, but you couldn't bring yourself to move. You were utterly frozen, your body cutting all communication with your mind. Unable to distinguish if you were immobilized in fear or in shock at how his measly Alpha pheromones have this much effect on you.

Thankfully, Charles' voice brought you back to reality when he checked up on you. You bolted to the door as soon as you regained control of your body, leaving the two men baffled at your swift exit from the gym and into the lobby.

"What's up with her?" Max stopped his treadmill and stepped down. Both of the men still looking at the direction you left.

"What's up with you? Why were you rude, mate?" Charles lightly smacked Max's head with his Ferrari cap. "You scared her off. Look, she even left her things in a hurry." They noticed your green flask still on your treadmill.

"What? I was just telling her, that kind of reaction is dangerous on track." Max replies.

"In what universe did you tell her that?"

"I did!"

"You did not. You clearly need to work on your communication skills, Max. Use your words." Charles reached for your flask and aggressively placed it on Max's hand. "For that, you apologize to the woman and return this to her."

"FINE. I'll apologize." Max scoffs as he fix his hair in his Red Bull cap. "Reserve that treadmill for me." He points at the machine you were previously using that was beside Charles.

Charles scoffs and shoos Max away. Max headed to the lobby but he was not able to locate you. He doesn't even have your number. He thought to ask his fellow drivers but surely no one have asked it yet. He spots an Aston Martin staff but when he asked where you might be, they are clueless.

"Max!" He turns at the call of his name and saw Pierre. "Why do you look so troubled?"

"Have you seen y/n by any chance? I have to give her this." Max raises your flask to Pierre as Yuki and Esteban walks up behind him.

"We just got back here from lunch outside the hotel but maybe you could send her a text to get that. Much easier." Yuki suggests.

"Yeah right, like I have her number." Max chuckles sarcastically.

"We do!" Yuki, Pierre, and Esteban answered in chorus.

"Wait, when did you get her number?" Max asks as he was genuinely bewildered at their response. He remembered that you were barely mingling with any of them during the pre-season testing in the circuit.

"Of course we got her number. Who wouldn't?" Pierre says as he scrolls through his contacts looking for your name.

"We competed through heads and tails to see who'll ask her number first." Esteban adds as he giggles.

"Lando introduced us to her during the gala. She was pulled away by Lance multiple times but when she got away from the sponsors, she would come back to the bar to chat with us." says Yuki.

"Here you go." Pierre shows Max your number and he types it in on his phone. He thanks his pal Pierre and sat down on the lobby couch to put your name in his contacts and start messaging you. The three of them bid farewell to Max and continues to walk up to the elevator.

Unknown Number: Hi! You left your flask in the gym. I'm still at the lobby. I was wondering how to give it to you.

It took almost 5 minutes before Max got a reply.

Aston Martin Y/N: Who's this? How did you get my number?

Max looks at the conversation thread and felt stupid that he didn't mention his name. Anybody would be wary in your position if they got that kind of text.

Unknown Number: My apologies, I didn't tell my name. This is Max. From Red Bull. I got your number from Pierre.

Then it took you 10 minutes to respond. You were fiddling with your hands on the screen as you think of a reply. It was supposed to be a simple reply but the fear in your body hasn't subsided yet. Fully sprawled out on the floor of your hotel bedroom.

Unknown Number: Do you plan to get it from me or do you want me to give it to any Aston Martin staff?

Another ping on your phone and you read the new text. Worried that you'll inconvenience a staff, you quickly typed in your reply.

Aston Martin Y/N: I'll get it. Going down in a sec. Wait.

You took your time to even stand up. Letting your pheromones and instincts recover from the nightmare you experienced just by taking in his scent. As you slowly walk towards the door, you changed his name in your contacts. At that moment coincidentally, you received another text from him.

HE WHO MUST BE AVOIDED AT ALL TIMES: Are you almost here? I still have to work out with Charles.

Aston Martin Y/N: Can you please wait? I'm waiting for the elevator.

Max decides to wait by the elevator when he read your text. He tilts his head up every time it opens and was starting to get irritated at how long you took to come down when finally he sees the door open with you in the elevator... with what seems to be ear plugs up your nose.

He bursts out laughing, even snorted at one point. "Still on brand, I see?" He noticed the green earplugs with a small brand logo peeking out on the side.

"You really enjoy teasing me, huh?" You say in a nasally tone while yanking the flask off his hands as he busies himself laughing his ass out. You turn back to the elevator, about to press the button.

"No, no. I'm sorry." Max fixes himself. "I apologize for earlier. Didn't mean to say those things that way."

"What do you mean?" You stop your hands from pressing the button and looked at Max.

"I'm glad you're okay. Just... maybe you could work more on your reaction time. A fraction of a second could mean winning or losing, and even crashing or not." Max mellows out his voice into concern.

"I am fully aware, not like i've just started racing this year. Thank you for the tip." You reply but as soon as you get a whiff of his scent despite there being a plug up in your bloody nose, you frantically press the elevator button.

The strength of the smell was less this time, maybe because Charles' scent is not in the mix. But nonetheless, Max's pheromones are still causing your hair on your arms to stand up even with the plug. You don't want to imagine the effect on you if you are able to clearly smell him this close without the help of suppressants.

"Do you have somewhere you need to be? You always seem to be in a hurry." Max asks in confusion. You pinch your nose to help minimize the scent.

"I just.. need.. to get out of here." You press the button a few more times and finally, it opens. "Thank you for giving me back my flask. Bye!" You ran inside and pressed the close button.

"What's wrong with her?" Max says out loud, leaving him utterly confused as he goes back to Charles in the gym.

He calls out to Charles when he stepped up on the treadmill.

"Hey! How was it?" Charles asks in between breaths.

"Do I stink?" Max sniffs his shirt and even his pits. He even lifts the collar of his shirt to prompt Charles to sniff him.

"No, mate. Why? Did somebody tell you that you stink?" Charles asks, fully focused with his workout and didn’t bother to actually sniff Max.

"No one. Just asking."

You spend the rest of your day cooped up in your room, trying to avoid Max. You try to think of ways to pass the time but all you have is a deck of cards and a television. Not really a fun way to spend your free time in the room.

No amount of Alpha pheromones have bothered you before. Not unless someone is raging mad like what you've regularly felt during races. But not like this. The combination of Charles' and Max's pheromones are dangerous for you, clearly more of Max's. Like it's enough to trigger a heat from you. Right now, you can't afford that. Good thing you took a suppressant before you met them.

A few minutes before dinner, you heard a knock on your door. You rush to get up from your bed and walk to the other side to get to the door.

"Hi Oscar!" you beam up at the presence of your fellow Omega when you opened the door.

"Hey! They want me to ask you if you're interested to play Switch and PS5 with the guys. They have food and drinks." says Oscar as he stands in front of your doorway.

"Sure. I could use some food right now. Let me get my phone." You smile and went straight for your nightstand.

"Great. I'll text..."

"Wait. Is Max there?" You halt in your steps.

"Him? He never joins us for game night. Too focused on race day." Once Oscar mentioned the absence of Max, you relax and continued to grab your phone and room key, then went back to the doorway. "Why do you ask?"

"Oh nothing. Just wondering."

Oscar didn't think anything more about your question. "They say to hurry. Almost done with the current tournament on Mario Kart. You have to join as the 4th driver." He gently pulls your hand and escorts you to the elevator.

Still, the mystery of why Max's pheromones have that effect on you continues to linger on your mind.

A steward reminded each team that the briefing was about to commence. All 20 drivers are ushered to find their own seats. As you were to take yours, you scan the room and noticed Charles and Max sitting together on the first row with either of their respective teammates beside them. As you were about to sit on the other far end of the next row, other drivers appeared out of nowhere and sat on the chairs next to you.

Oscar made sure to take the seat on your right and pulled Lando to sit next to him. As Alex was about to sit next to you, George hastily took the seat on your left. You quietly giggle at how amusing the boys look. You've gotten so close with some of them after spending your pre-race break by playing video games as a group.

The briefing started and they discussed new rules, and addressed some concerns that were brought up during the pre-season testing. Everything was on point and on time. Good lucks were thrown back and forth to all the teams and everyone bid their goodbyes before heading back to their respective hospitalities in the paddock.

You and Fernando struts back into your own room in the team's garage and came out in your white racing top with your race suits' sleeves tied to your waists and a green cap to keep your hair in place. Your trainer proceeds to work with you to test your reflexes using tennis balls.

Megan pats your shoulder and points at the far end of the Aston Martin Garage. Oscar, in his orange overalls, tries to peek his head through and calls your attention. You excused yourself from your trainer and sprinted towards Oscar.

"What's up? You need anything?" you smile at the Australian driver.

"Did you take your suppressants?" Oscar asks and you nod quickly in respond. "Good. Don't underestimate the pheromones of these guys during races. I had trouble back then when I was still unmated, especially with Lando's. They could really fuck up your races without even needing any contact with your car."

"Really? That bad?" You reply with a nervous laugh.

"Just make sure you have your suppressants with you every race week. That's a priority. Don't ask anyone else to give you or else, your secret might get out. Also, I don't bring mine anymore since Lando takes care of my heat prior to every race week."

"Okay Mom! At least somebody's getting some action." You sheepishly tease Oscar, nudging him at his side.

"Anyways, good luck out there rookie!" Oscar jokingly pulls down your cap to cover your eyes and he steps away, back to his team garage.

"Good luck to you too, Mom!" You shout. Oscar raises his hand and waves it, still walking forward.

You go back to your trainer and continued on with your training.

"Formula 1 is back, and it's time for Qualifying for the 20th World Championship Bahrain Grand Prix. 23 races in 2023 and we get underway for the 6th time in F1 history right here in the Bahrain International Circuit"

You and Fernando went to your respective corners beside your car. Like a well-oiled machine, every part was doing its job perfectly. A team of engineers briefed you of the strategy, at the same time Fernando's team of engineers did theirs.

You fix the rest of your race suit on and placed the earpiece before putting on your balaclava. An engineer hands you your helmet and hans device. Now all set-up, the two Aston Martin drivers lowered themselves into the cockpit and buckled up. Mechanics making their final checks and removing the tire blanket. The engine roared and echoed back. Music to your ears.

Driver number 13 officially representing Aston Martin for the start of the season. Time to do what you do best.

You and Fernando went to do incredibly flying laps through Q1. The engineers back at the pit wall seem pretty pleased with the pace. In Q2, it was unfortunate that Fernando failed to continue for Q3 after a Haas collided with his rear wing and puncturing his rear tire.

Your pit mechanic signals you to go out of the garage once again when Q3 had resumed, followed by the drivers of Ferrari and Red Bull. For the first five minutes, Red Bull and Ferrari had dominated the front row as Verstappen in P1 and Leclerc in P2.

In the last seven minutes, you were able to climb P3 with purples in sector 1 and 2.

You heard a familiar beep in your earpiece as Ben, your race engineer, informed you,

"P3, that's P3."

"Do I have enough pace to try for P2 on the final lap?"

"Confirm. We can try for P2."

You push flat-out on the throttle, eyes darting forward like a hawk. Concentrated on getting purple on all sectors.

Max was granted the provisional pole as he crosses the line, followed by Charles. Charles was informed by his race engineer that he's on P2 at the moment. Max was able to snatch the purple sectors in 1 and 2, while Charles got purple in sector 3. Time's up for Q3 and the remaining drivers' lap times are still to be recorded.

One by one, the remaining drivers cross the line. Max and Charles was told to wait as their race engineers inform them through the radio that you now got purple in sectors 1 and 2. You've yet to complete sector 3 and cross the line. The two men now looking back at their mirrors, catching to see a glimpse of you.

"And it's y/n on pole position for the first race of the season! Her maiden pole! What an amazing lap by this year's only rookie, and she starts on the front row tomorrow."

The two men, in awe by your performance, didn't notice their respective engineers talking through their radios.

Your PR officer guided you to the flock of reporters in the media pen for the driver interviews. Each of them congratulated you and asked about your maiden pole. You carefully answer every question while your PR officer stand beside you, before going on to the next reporter.

Charles and Max were also inside the media pen at the same time as you. Charles to your right and Max to your left. You were the first one among the three of you to finish your media duties. Your PR officer bid you goodbye as she rushes to the team hospitality while talking to someone on the phone.

Charles approached you from behind, "Hey y/n! Congratulations on your maiden pole!"

You gave a genuine smile at the compliment from the Monegasque. "Thanks Charles! You two were extremely hard to beat."

"I look forward to racing with you on the front row tomorrow!" Charles quickly waved goodbye just as how short he said his greeting.

He seems to be in a hurry as well so you just responded, "You too!"

A few seconds later, somebody came behind you to pat your back. As you turn your head, Max blurts out, "Congratulations. That was a pretty good qualifying debut."

Still wary at his presence, you vaguely took a step away from him and held your breath. "Thank you... Congratulations to you too." You try to take a sniff but relief wash over you as his pheromones today wasn't as strong as you'd think. Possibly because you did two doses of the suppressants.

"What's your problem?" Max darts his eyes at you.

"Huh?" You reply, looking confused.

"You always seem to act like I stink when you're around me. I thought it was just my imagination but you act the same every time you stand by me." Max stood tall and crossed his arms.

"No. That wasn't what I..."

"I have the same perfume as Charles yet you don't have a problem with him. Kinda rude for a rookie, don't you think?!" Max continues.

"Are you done? You gonna let me explain?" You reply, also crossing your arms.

And there it is again. That scent. But this time it smelled a bit different. Smelled stronger but muskier. More aggressive than the last time you smelled it on him. Once again, your throat starts to dry up. Your chest and legs are starting to feel weird.

Max noticed your nose scrunch and sees you slightly take another step back. Appalled by your reaction, he cursed under his breath so quietly. He was about to voice out his irritation at you when Oscar runs to insert himself between the two of you.

"Hey Max! Sorry but I need to snatch her away. It seems that y/n is needed by... her engineers! Yes, for a meeting." Oscar mumbled and chuckles as he tries to make more space between you and Max.

"Her engineers asked you to get her? You're a Mclaren Driver." Max raised an eyebrow in response.

"Oh, who minds the small details?" Oscar wafts his hands in the air before pulling you away from Max. "Sorry if i interrupted your conversation!"

Oscar pulled you away from Max's line of sight as fast as he can. Almost comical to see you two running across the paddock. He turns to a corner and lets go of your hand. You lean your hands on your knees and try to catch your breath as Oscar looks back just in case Max is still in the area.

"That was close. A photographer almost took a photo of you two and from where I was standing, the conversation didn't seem to look so friendly." says Oscar.

"Yeah, that was close-- Huh?"

When Oscar pulled you away from Max, you thought he could sense the trouble you were in. Your trouble with Max's presence.

"Wait, you couldn't smell him? His pheromones?" You ask, clearly puzzled at the reason for Oscar's interruption.

"No. Max didn't smell any different when I stood between you two. Why? What's wrong?" Oscar now looks concerned as he walks closer to you.

"Nothing. I just think my nose is busted." You dismiss the lingering thought at the back of your mind. Surely that musn't be it.

"Wait, I just remembered that you really are needed at your garage. Lance was looking for you earlier." Oscar pats your back and pushes you to the direction of your garage. You almost curse that you lost track of time as you ran back like your life depended on it.

"And it's lights out and away we go!"

Next Part: Part 3

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utilitycaster · 3 months

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@notstinglesstoo replied to your post “The thing is, and I haven't gotten a chance to...”:

I saw someone not long ago say cr has always felt like a product to them vs D20 feeling organic and I protected my peace but I did want to ask them if they were brain dead

Oh man I wanted to address this at length because I feel this. My posts have been centered, again, specifically on published journalists picking Daggerheart aprt critically and applauding themselves for doing so despite it being within a couple of hours of its release and therefore any analysis is necessarily going to be based on at best, a skim, when they just as frequently will claim D20 seasons/Kollok are flawless works of genius based on only a partial read, but man D20's got a fandom problem too. (and all of the following comes with the caveat of "I really enjoy D20, and Dropout, and while we're at it WBN and NADDPod which both are half D20 Intrepid Heroes cast, and think Brennan is a particularly brilliant GM, and also it's obvious that the D20 and CR casts are on great terms, and wish the fandom for D20 were more welcoming and enjoyable because I feel it wasn't like this when I first started watching, as a CR fan, in late 2019 and has since curdled into something really weird and bad.")

The first point is the obvious one: technically speaking these are both products. These are performers doing an art form; it is also a portion of how they make their money with which they can buy goods and services. Believing that art is inauthentic when the artist gets paid and acknowledges that is a thing that happens is a fucking libertarian position at best. Like cool, you think only people who are independently wealthy by other means can make art, because it's not real labor, my kid could paint that, etc etc.

The second point is also pretty obvious. I have pushed back pretty hard on the "uwu CR is just watching friends! it's like we're in their living room" mentality among the fandom, which has decreased, thankfully, but like...it did in fact start organically as a private home game, and they decided, when invited, to make it A Show For An Audience. D20 was created on purpose as a show for an audience. This doesn't make it bad or fake - reread the previous paragraph - but in terms of "this is an group of people who really played D&D in this world together even before the cameras were rolling," Critical Role literally is that, and D20 is not.

I think beyond that...my biggest issues with the D20 fandom are first, the level of discourse is abominable. The tag is almost always just shrieking praise and the most surface-level readings possible. I keep bringing up the "Capitalism is the BBEG" mug but it genuinely sums up so much of how I feel; people who want their existing beliefs fed to them as surface-level no-nuance takes. I mean capitalism is fucking terrible but I do not need every work I watch to have a character turn to the camera and say "capitalism is bad" to enjoy myself, and indeed it makes it harder due to the lack of subtlety and grace. For all D20 fans complain about how unhealthily parasocial CR fans can be (and some can be), I find that a lot of the most unhealthily parasocial "how dare they BETRAY my TRUST by having a ship I don't like or not speaking up about every single societal ill" ex-CR fans move over to D20 and then pull the exact same shit; it simply doesn't get called out. Every time D20 fans are like "we don't want to become the CR fandom" it's like "your toxic positivity and unhealthy parasocial behavior exceeds the HEIGHT of what I've seen in CR; the main difference is that CR started in 2015 when D&D was still shaking off the raging bigot dudebros and so in the early days it acquired more of those fans, whereas by the time D20 came around the landscape of who played D&D and watched Actual Play had shifted wildly, and you need to judge September 2018 D20 fans in parallel to September 2018 CR fans, not September 2015 CR fans."

I also feel, and I alluded to this in the post about journalism, and other people have said this better than I have, but the pedestal people have put D20 on does feel like a single...not even misstep, but just, difficult choice that doesn't capitulate to the loudest fans will bring a good chunk of that fandom crashing to the ground. And that includes the journalists. For all the fans of CR can still be obsessed with the cast to an unhealthy degree? The cast and company have put up pretty strong boundaries and have not budged. D20 hasn't, and I think the second they do - and I think it will be for their benefit as a company and a channel - a big chunk of their most vitriolic CR-hating portion of the fandom will viciously turn on them.

#notstinglesstoo #nonrebloggable bc god it's hell week for me i know i've been shooting off opinions bc that is how i blow off steam #but like. i can't have this break containment i got shit to do

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drama-glob · 8 months

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SPOILERS FOR HELLUVA BOSS SEASON 2 EPISODE 7!!!!

Let me start off by saying F*CK YOU MAMMON!!!! >:( >:( >:(

Okay now, I LOVED THIS EPISODE because as much at it broke my heart with how much of a gut punch it was that Fizz has been putting up with Mammon for years, the fact that he got his freedom at the end with the constant support of Blitz and Ozzie, who genuinely care about him melted my heart as well. ^_^

I knew going in I was going to hate Mammon (because with how he runs his ring, I couldn't see how he could have any redeeming qualities), but he seriously was a bigger abusive d*ck and was way more blatant about than I expected. >:( Poor Fizz right off the bat with his unhealthy work ethic that he's not good enough and that his value is tied into his work, something that many of us (me included) have been guilty of. I blame Cash for being the most likely factor in why Fizz thinks that way, along with his idol worship of Mammon playing into it. >:( Also, that creep getting in Fizz's head was so messed up because we come to see how genuinely nice Fizz is and he sadly let what that guy said get into his head. ;_;

I'm so glad that Ozzie from the start is looking out for Fizz's well being and mental health, which is also really sad because he has no doubt had this conversation many times with Fizz about not needing to please Mammon and that he is good enough, only for Fizz to insist everything's fine when it's not. ;_; I also had a feeling Ozzie wouldn't be a fan of the Robo Fizzes given that he loves Fizz so much and knows what people use them for, so most likely it's part of the whole blackmail deal/Ozzie can't break out of making them so long as Fizz doesn't call it quits. ;_; I'm also happy that Ozzie clearly harbors no ill-will towards Blitz (which we already saw in "Oops," but it's nice that he knows Blitz wouldn't like the state Fizz is in and needs to cut ties with Mammon). :)

Fizz is just so talented with his craft, but the further pressure that he had actual competition from Glitz and Glam just made things so much worse, but of course Mammon don't care. >:( One of the absolute best moments though had to be the sweet little deaf kid signing to Fizz and Fizz signing back as well as sign his picture, so it was sweet and it helped Fizz's mental state temporarily. It was unfortunate that flipping creep came back and messed with Fizz once again, only adding to Fizz's panic attack that goes into overdrive once he sees Glitz and Glam perform. ;_;

My sadness only built as Fizz spiraled and tried to make himself "fine," but my man Ozzie being there as soon as he hears (from Blitz no doubt) that Fizz is not okay and him not leaving until he can get to the bottom of way Fizz is so adamant about doing this while trying to comfort him was wonderful. I legit cried, as I'm sure many of you did, when poor Fizz admits that he feels like practically nothing next to Ozzie and that without his job and the fame, he'd eventually leave Fizz despite how many years they've known each other and how much Ozzie does to remind Fizz that he loves him for who he is. ;_; ;_; ;_; It's sad too that Fizz has put up with the year of abuse because he felt he owed Mammon for leading him Ozzie, even though that's certainly not true. It really brought it in home just how much trauma Fizz has suffered and affected his mental state. I can only imagine how bad it'd be if he really didn't have Ozzie in his life. O_O The sweet, honest words from Ozzie afterward just reinforced my belief that Ozzie is the best boyfriend and their song "Crooked" was so saturated with lovey-dovey sentiment, I went awwww so many times and shows how lucky they are to have each other. ^_^<3<3<3

Fizz's "2-Minutes Notice" was absolutely incredible, (especially considering this was improv ;) ) and the fact Mammon didn't realize it was about him until the end was hilarious! XD But Fizz certainly proved how amazing he is and I'm sure Ozzie was more than happy to provide the magical backup to really stick it to Mammon. ;) ^_^ <3 It was really cool getting to see full demon Mammon and Ozzie, but it was especially amazing that Ozzie announced he loved Fizz to everyone so that he could no longer be blackmailed by Mammon and so Fizz could be free of that asshole; plus, he already seemed tired of hiding it. ^_^<3<3<3 Although Mammon will definitely come back for revenge on this sweet couple, Fizz and Ozzie get to at least have their peace for now and will face the future of their relationship being outed to all of Hell together. Also, those giant nuzzles from Ozzie are everything to me! ^_^<3<3<3<3<3

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blorbocedes · 24 days

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it’s crazy that redbull use to love chopping drivers’ heads off mid season because they got the ick, but now they are just unwilling to sacrifice anyone, on top of promising lawson a seat and having another driver on the come up who’s a championship contender in f2. they don’t have solid plans for yuki, but keep extending his contracts with the sister team, they’re letting dr hoard the seat with his nasty asscheeks. checo seems to have his place secured too, but it will probably bite them in the future, because this gap between him and max will be punishing as others have been catching up

if you want 'my source: I made it up' take on it all it goes like this:

the redbull power struggle from earlier this year hasn't ended. it's merely at an impasse. redbull's thai owners stopped horner from getting fired, and max credibly threatening to leave and tying his contract to helmut's means CH can't get the old man fired either. and remember, helmut used to be in charge of who gets the seat when deitrich was alive and still holds considerable influence

if DR performed like yuki is this year, you would've absolutely seen him in the redbull car by now because he was brought in as Horner's pet project. they would happily mid season chop Checo's neck. then lawson who proved himself in the car could fill his seat in vcarb

you'll see conflicting narratives where redbull/DR sources like medland will say yuki's not in contention for redbull, yuki's shopping for other seats and he doesn't even want the seat

and then yuki himself saying he's happy to be in vcarb until he gets a shot at redbull, and helmut saying he is being looked at.

since yuki would be helmut's pick, horner doesn't want to consider him and thus lose out on the driver selection process. that's why you'll also hear so much "oh yuki goes wherever Honda will take him" yuki also has never been allowed to test in a redbull, ever. so whenever there's narratives of put DR in the car he's the fastest in the sim -- yuki hasn't ever been allowed to test for that car!!! and they've had everyone in their junior programme including f3 drivers test it!!!

so checo. the car is worse this year, and hes showing for it by being 5th in the standings rn. If redbull loses the constructors, esp with Ferrari catching up, it will be because of checo. but checo brings in the most sponsors after max and lewis, so the math horner has to justify to the board is he brings in more $ than losing first in the constructors will give us (around 20 mil). the redbull also being harder to drive means you don't want to risk an entirely new driver getting to grips with it when you have someone for the past few years who has reliably driven it where you want (checo was 2nd in standings last year).

checo getting the 1 year extension means once again he'll have to prove his worth for the team, and will be expendable after 2025. 2026 is when new regulations kick in! that changes the whole game... max allowing the merc flirtation to happen this year and redbull (horner) saying they're looking at fernando and carlos and whoever else is in chess when both sides make forward pawn moves. max is showing he's not married to redbull until 28, esp if the engines aren't good, and redbull going fine! we can look at other drivers too~ (not in their own junior programme tho 💀).

that's why they're keeping the status quo for 2025 and trying to keep EVERY driver available, cause then 2026 with new regs and Ford becomes the game changer.

#silly season #redbull racing #blorbocedes ask

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tkwrites · 8 months

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Snapshots Masterlist

Quinn Hughes x ofc

Are Quinn Hughes and Sarah Roberts fated to be together? It seems like it. Follow their journey from a spur of the moment first date to falling in love and all the good and bad in between.

These snapshots are written in whatever order strikes my fancy, but there is a loose timeline they fall into. I've listed them in both timeline and posting order. There are some timeline inconsistencies that will be edited as needed. In the meantime, let's just agree to pretend they don't exist. Also, the season the Canucks are playing in is obviously fictional and doesn't follow any actual season.

• Please be aware, this series deals with a lot of grief.

The Snapshots playlist can be found here.

Other work can be found on my Fanfiction Masterlist.

*indecates smut

In Timeline Order:

Our Heroes Meet: When Quinn and Sarah meet, they’re pulled into each other's lives in a way neither one expected.

Worth the Wait: It takes more than a week, but Quinn and Sarah finally go on a date.

Second Nature: Sequel to Worth the Wait, Quinn and Sarah have their second date. Getting to know each other in many ways is like second nature.

Love Me Gently* Early on in their relationship, Quinn and Sarah have their first really sexual encounter, and learn about each other along the way.

The Second Time is Better* Sequel to Love Me Gently, Quinn and Sarah have sex for the first time. After a disappointing first performance, they're in for an experience much deeper than either one expected.

First Fight: Quinn and Sarah have their first fight - we learn more about Quinn’s previous relationship

Better: Sequel to First Fight, Sarah meets Brady and Emma and is thrown into the world of hockey outside the rink. Jack and Luke hear about their relationship in a less than favorable way.

He's Got It Bad: When Sarah meets the team at Conor's birthday party, not only does she get to know Quinns teammates and their partners, she enters a world she never expected. At practice the next day, the guys congratulate and tease Quinn mercilessly.

I'll Be Proud For You: When an opportunity for Quinn to meet her uncle arrives, Sarah jumps at the chance and they attend a St. Patrick's Day party at her uncle's house on Salt Spring Island. On the ferry ride back home, Sarah finally explains why she had to be close to family after her mothers death, necessitating her move to Vancouver.

Messages* Missing him something fierce, Sarah sends Quinn a video of herself in his bed.

Before I meet your parents...* As Sarah prepares to meet Quinn’s parents, she’s bombarded with new feelings and situations, as well as trying to manage her own life. A very worried Quinn helps her get to the bottom of it and does everything he can to make it better.

Sarah Meets the Parents: As Requested, Sarah meets Ellen and Jim.

Happy Birthday, Sarah: Quinn is gone over Sarah’s Birthday.

Good For You* Quinn and Sarah have a discussion about and decide to stop using condoms before putting that decision into practice. A question we’ve all been waiting for is finally asked.

Private Lessons: As requested by @eyesthatroll, Quinn teaches Sarah to skate.

Shoot The Moon* The snapshot that started it all - Quinn comes home exhausted from a rough road trip. After a good night's sleep, he decides to try out some new things with Sarah.

Summer Decisions: An invitation to his family reunion over the fourth of July has Quinn and Sarah tumbling into a long conversation about their future in the off-season and beyond. Though the ensuing fight is resolved, the reality of their commitments vs. their love for each other is put to the test.

Let the Cleaners Deal With It: When Quinn wakes to Sarah frantically cleaning after unexpectedly getting her period, he insists she let the cleaners deal with it.

Elimination* When the Canucks are eliminated from the Stanley Cup Playoffs, Sarah offers Quinn a kind of comfort he didn’t know he needed.

Love, Even in the Hard Parts When his mom can't make it to take Quinn to surgery, Sarah steps in in spite of her hatred of hospitals.

I miss you.* After their longest separation of the summer, Quinn and Sarah reunite.

I miss you. - Bonus Scene* A short continuation of I miss you. Quinn and Sarah make soft, sleepy love as they doze off for the night.

Please* After they finally move in together, Sarah follows through with Quinn's request for her to edge him.

I can't believe you're here.* After a very long time apart due to bad timing, Sarah surprises Quinn on the road. Wearing his jersey, she fulfills one of his long harbored fantasies. The night just gets better when he sees what she has on underneath.

In Posting Order: