#this is NOT me taking a stance on whether jesus went to heaven or hell when he died

[aropride]

ok well we know that jesus can emit pure light as he did when he was in his tomb + i assume the light is holiness or joy or purity (considering his spirit was in heaven but his body had died in sin) (considering his body was holy but his spirit was drowning in unquenchable fire).. thinking about the version of jesus i made up in my head who's way cooler and more transgender and i think he would emit sparks and a glowing electric light if you fucked him and i think it would inspire an unfathomably intense lust

[bootyassnodt]

Nocturne - Our kind of love

An angsty, intimate, soft and vulnerable fic, featuring a very wounded Prosciutto, and fem!reader, from one of the first ideas I ever had about him, months ago. Potential trigger warning for blood and injuries. The music is Nocturne No.20 in C-sharp Minor, by Chopin

Your eyes were strained on the clock for god-knows how long. His voice was echoing in your head, as you were mentally replaying his reassuring way of saying goodbye for the millionth time. His usual, cold, cocksure promise of being home by 11 at latest, calling tonight’s hit a low-risk small job, before setting out in the night made your stomach knot to the verge of nausea. It was ten minutes past one and you already lost the sensation in your fingertips from continuously tapping on the kitchen table for the past two hours. 

You were cursing and scolding him mentally in the first hour, like an old wife, it was even comical, and if he could have heard it, you two would have had a good laugh over it. But as time passed, you felt smaller and smaller, your skin colder, your palms clammier, your throat more and more dry as the possibility of him never coming home crept into the back of your mind. It was always an option, he often reminded you despite your constant protest against the topic, this was part of dating a mafia man. A hitman, to be correct, and these times the reality bit into your heart a little harder than usual. Your lover, your partner, your sweet companion of years, the man whose arms around you were the closest thing to heaven on Earth, was killing people for a living. He was nothing more than a very professional murderer in an expensive suit, and he wouldn’t be the first to fall victim to his lifestyle. 

Half past one. He had never been out for this long without letting you know the reason behind it. Never broke a promise, never missed a date, never made you feel secondary in his life. Prosciutto was a good man, or at least good to you, and while you felt like you could kill him yourself for making you feel like this if he turns up alive, in your heart you were already bargaining with whatever god was up there, to bring him home to you safely, in one piece. 

Your mind barely registered the faint scratching coming from the front door, yet you shot up on your feet, only to fall back onto the chair, blacking out a little around the corners of your vision. The scratching became clearer, it was the sound of a key failing to find its way to the keyhole. Like those nights when you hastily tried to open the front door after making out in the taxi on the way home from clubbing all night, only to sloppily make drunken love on the couch and to fall asleep tangled into each other. This memory brought warmth into your heart and power to your limbs, so you hurried to the door with determination. It was him out there, no doubt about it, and a part of you truly hoped that he just went out for some drinks with his team after the job, and got hammered beyond the point of coming home on time. It was very unlikely, still, the most comforting option possible.

As you opened the door, Prosciutto basically fell on you with a tired grunt, his body like dead weight on your shoulders, but instead of the expected smell of alcohol, the heavy, metallic stench of blood filled your senses. As you tried to wrap your arm around his waist, you noticed the wide smear of dried blood on the white door, where he was probably leaning in the past minutes. Your hands were already getting sticky, and your face squirmed in horror when your reflection stared back at you in the mirror, with the off-red stains on your pajama shirt growing more prominent. You tried to lower yourself a bit so that you could match the gaze of your man, who was breathing heavily with his head hanging low.

- Prosciutto, is this your blood? - your voice was weaker than you hoped for.

- Some of it - he huffed, trying to straighten his stance. His right shoulder was unnaturally stiff, and as he tried to support his elbow with his left hand, he groaned loudly in pain, and leaned back onto you. - Okay, most of it.

- Jesus fuckin Christ, and what’s going on with your….

- Tesoro - he said firmly, looking into your eyes. - Bathroom. Now.

You carefully led him through your apartment, noting how his breath hitched at every step, indicating at least one broken rib. The pictures on the wall with that perfect, overjoyed couple looking back at you, seemed to be slightly judging this mess in the dim light. You tried to bite back your tears as you kicked the bathroom door open, and sat him down on the wide edge of your bathtub, carefully removing his shoes, socks and pants. At least his legs didn’t sustain any injuries, which was good news, but as you moved up to take off his jacket, Prosciutto instantly grabbed your wrist with his left hand, gritting his teeth in pain.

- Bring in the scissors from the kitchen - he growled, his voice being even deeper and raspier than usual. - You will need to cut the jacket off of me.

- Cut it off? But… - you looked all over the dark blue, well-tailored worsted wool piece, now fully soaked in blood, remembering the day he first came home in it with a beaming smile, looking like a movie star, ecstatic about his latest paycheck well spent. Tears welled up in your eyes. - This is your favourite....

- Babe - his expression softened, and he gently caressed your arm. - My right shoulder is dislocated, and I cannot put it back while wearing a jacket, and if I try to remove it with my arm sticking out in that angle, I’m afraid I will faint from the pain, or shit myself, or both. And we don’t want that, do we?

- It must be really bad if you are trying to be funny - you let out a dry laugh while wiping off your tears with the back of your hand. - I’ll be right back.

You placed a gentle kiss on his forehead, and tucked his disheveled fringe back behind his ear. The mixture of sweat and blood you could taste on your lips from his skin occupied your mind as you absent-mindedly raked through the drawer under the kitchen counter, looking for the biggest, stainless steel scissors you kept at home. It was more like a weapon and less like a tool, and you cannot remember if you or Prosciutto ever used it around the house before.

You knew all too well, how much Prosciutto loved to fix everything on his own, whether it was a dripping faucet, or a wound, or a ripped shirt, even after years of sharing his life with someone like you. Seeing him slumped at the exact same spot you left him, looking up to you with tired eyes, and a telltale expression of him fighting to hide the pain from you, was truly heartbreaking. You have never seen your man like this before, and you really thought you have seen everything from him. 

In the hopes of getting it sewn back one day, you started cutting the jacket along the seams, paying extra attention not to ruin the fabric itself, but the blood seeping out of it under your touch made this task more difficult than you hoped for. Freeing him from the heavy wool garment, you had to hold back your tears once more when you saw his graphite grey shirt also completely soaked in blood.

- The shirt too?

He nodded.

Putting a dislocated joint back in place was a way more arduous task than you have seen in the movies before, and you just did what Prosciutto said, as he seemed way too experienced in the matter. At that point, you didn’t even want to know, so you kept the questions to yourself. You put on some Chopin, as he asked, held his right hand firmly to his body from behind as he asked, closed your eyes as he asked, and kept yourself from vomiting when you heard the wet pop of the joint finding its place and felt your lover’s whole body twitch from the agonizing sensation against you. 

After taking a deep breath and acknowledging the good riddance of the tension, you ran the bath, and took the emergency kit out of the cabinet, sorting out the antiseptic, the gauze, the bandage and some adhesive plaster, before turning back to him.

- You of all people - you started while cleaning the blood off of his skin with a wet cloth. - How the hell did you manage to get this roughed up?

- Work, tesoro. You know how it is.

- Yes, I know, and this is not how it is! - you looked him straight in his ever glistening, bright blue eyes. - Prosciutto, what happened? 

- I got outnumbered - he shot his glance to the floor while exhaling sharply. - The intel was wrong, and I couldn’t use my stand. There were civilians, I had to go in.

- And I guess you were expected to show up, too - he nodded, while you uncovered more and more wounds, the water down there in the bathtub turning red. - One more question, why didn’t you go to the hospital? Or whatever is that back-alley butchery is called where you guys go after getting injured… 

- That was… not an option - he really didn’t like to involve you too much with his job, but you looked at him with an interrogative gaze, and he let out a defeated sigh knowing that he cannot escape. - That is where the job was, actually. Riz got intel that the lead doctor went rogue, giving over medical and stand info to an American gang.

- So you were sent there to clean up.

- Exactly. It seemed easy, the plan was letting Grateful Dead in while I have a cigarette outside, then burning some papers, then picking up a nice amount of cash on my way home to you.

- But there were civilians. Patients? Let’s see... children of crooks in debt, placed there as a bait to distract you?

- That’s my clever girl, give me a kiss - he pulled your chin towards him, and you couldn’t help but smile against his lips. Prosciutto was there, he was alive, and you finally let yourself relax into his presence.

- So you went in - you continued while wringing the crimson cloth into the bathtub. - Wait, where is your pistol?

- At the HQ, I had to leave it there to be repaired. Don’t ask.

- You were at the HQ and they let you go looking like this? Who was there on duty? Formaggio? Melone? I’m going to flay them alive!

- Calm down, gattina - he snickered, but held his side as the pain from the broken rib jolted through his body. - If anyone was there, they were sleeping already, I just left my stuff on the table with a note. Okay, now let me get up, I need a cigarette.

- The fuck you need a cigarette. With your blood pressure, and this kind of blood loss - you placed your hands on your hips. - Also, they were in your jacket, probably drenched too - He huffed, and shook his head, with a smile spreading on his face.

- All right, let me take a look in the mirror then - he stood up, taking a thorough look at his many injuries, some bullet grazes, some bruises, some cuts, most of them still oozing blood. - Bring in some whisky and two glasses if you may. We are celebrating.

- Celebrating? - You chuckled in disbelief, locking your eyes with his through the mirror.

- Tonight we are taking our relationship to the next level - he said, examining a particularly deep cut on the backside of his ribs. He turned to face you. - Because tonight, my love, I am going to teach you how to stitch up a wound.

It took you a second of blinking at him with hollow eyes. That was just so out of character for him, the man with a longer skin routine than yours, and the man almost ridiculously peculiar about the state of every inch of his flawless body. You decided to chalk it up for the blood loss.

- You really want me to do this? - you grazed your fingertips over his arm. - It surely will leave a scar if you let a rookie like me near your skin.

- Look how deep and nasty it is. Also, I cannot reach it properly. And you know, I actually wouldn’t mind getting a scar from you, it would be a nice change to have one worthy of remembering. Will you be a good girl and do this one for me? - He stepped closer to you, his left hand caressing down the small of your back as he pressed his forehead against yours.

- How could I say no to you - you whispered, and held his face in your hands.

You knew he was bleeding and in a considerable amount of pain, but that didn’t seem to bother any of you, at least not for that one, placid moment. You studied his face as if you still couldn’t believe he finally came home to you after those excruciating hours of waiting, and Prosciutto, well, he was looking into your eyes as if he knew exactly what you were thinking about.

- One more thing, tesoro - he leaned close to your ear to break the silence at last, in a hushed tone. - I know I made you angry. You worried about me, and I bet you were eating yourself alive waiting for me. It’s alright if you are mad at me, but please, do not think I don’t know what is at risk. I know I fucked up tonight, but I will always come home to you, as long as I am able to.

The tears you choked back in the past hours now let themselves flow without a barrier, and you buried your face into the crook of his clavicle, shaking. There was no further need for words, you just stood there, melting into each other’s embrace, trying to protect that little, perfect, safe haven you had amidst the kind of world your love was thrown into. 

Finally, you broke the hug with some gentle pats on his hip, and for a split second you could have sworn that you saw Prosciutto wiping away some tears too. God, he was beautiful. Beautiful, but bleeding, a matter that needed immediate assistance from your end.

- All right carino, let me patch you up - you said in a cheerful tone, turning to the emergeny kit. - I put on that white satin bedding you love so much, and if you bleed through that, I’ll have to kill you in cold blood.

He let out a hearty laugh, as far his ribs let him.

- As you wish, my love.

[sharingshane-blog]

Why the Bloody Hell a Christian!?

I am religious, self-identifying Christian.  This part of me has had significant influence in whom I am today.  It is not something that I discuss often; yet, it is also not something I keep secret either.  It does usually take people by surprise to learn this fact about me.  I just finished writing a blog post about one of my idols, Emma Goldman, who was a staunch atheist.  I am transgender and bisexual, and I believe it is okay for me to live fully and authentically as myself.  I have date men, women, and non-binary folks happily and without remorse.  I am a steadfast leftist and a large critic of the church not just in the United States but around the world too.  I am also a critic of organized religion in general. I usually advice against looking for savior figures.  That is in part how dictators come to power.  I have extremely close atheist and agnostic friends.  I also have Muslim, Jewish, and even Satanist friends. I have also suffered abuse and ostracization from my church growing up which contributed to a lot of the psychological issues that I possess today.  I do also agree that the Bible does contain homophobic, ethnocentric, sexist, and genocidal content.  It also contains slave apology, human sacrifices, and rape defenses.  So, the question that may be running through your head at this point may be, “Why would you identify as a Christian?”

Well, let me start with why I do not talk about my Christian faith that often.  It is rooted solely in the way people perceive me when I talk about my faith than what I say about my faith.  Since Christianity is so mainstream in the United States, there is already widespread knowledge about the basics of the religion.  When Christians give out little booklets saying, “Did you know Jesus—?” it comes off like they are insulting the intelligence of anyone who is not perceived to be with the “in-group.”  I think sometimes many Christians lose sight of the fact that anyone outside their small group of other think-alike Christians are just as human and capable of cogitative reasoning as them.  Many people outside the realm of Christianity know the basic tenets of the Christian faith, and many even know and understand the Bible better than most self-identifying Christians.  Evangelism in the sense of educating people about the basics of the faith is essentially unnecessary in the United States, and I want to avoid coming off as an evangelist to other people.  When I speak about my faith, I do not want others to perceive me as that evangelist.  I want to communicate that I believe they are intelligent individuals with their own interpretations of spirituality that are completely based on valid perspectives of the world.  It is demeaning and degrading the way most Christians interact with others outside their little Christian in-group.  

Furthermore, there is a level of stigma growing against Christians on the left.  I am a leftist and potentially communist even.  Most of my friends are self-identified as atheist or agnostic.  Also, many of them have dealt with real abuse from the church in the past.  This is also true of my LGBTQ+ friends.  Unfortunately, in these groups, sometimes I must minimize my references to the Bible because it could potentially trigger traumatizing memories.  I can empathize since have also experienced trauma from the church, and I have a difficult time with Christianized language and contemporary worship music. I rather speak of Christianity in a deep philosophical way or in an extremely pragmatic way.  Enough with the bullshit abstract concepts with no explanation redundantly displayed in every single church!  I get that Jesus loves me, a basic tenet of Christianity.  But what does it mean for him to love me? What is love?  Does his love have limits?  But back to the trauma stuff.  Since the church has hurt these communities quite repeatedly in the past, it is absolutely understandable that individuals in these communities have built a stealthy resentment towards Christianity as a whole.  I have been an agnostic twice and sometimes I really do doubt whether I want to be associated with the label “Christian.”  I do possess strong convictions despite minimizing how much I discuss it.  It does still play an instrumental role in my life.

Back to the original question, “Why the bloody hell am I still a Christian?”  Before I move forward, I will not and cannot give objective evidence for the existence of God and specifically the Christian God.  I am aware that many of my views are dogmatic and originate from anecdotal observations rather than factual content.  Many intellectuals cannot agree on a solid argument for the existence of God, so do not expect such an unrealistic feat from me.  If you were to go down the route of a strictly logical path I would say that agnosticism is probably the most reasonable conclusion based on factual evidence.  The best arguments from the perspective of theism are abductive arguments, arguments that attempt to give the best possible explanation for a phenomenon.  Occam’s Razor, the simplest explanation taking into account all the facts is the best explanation, is the method in which to find the best possible explanation for a phenomenon thereby strengthening an abductive argument.  For example, our ability to comprehend and discover science is one such phenomenon in which arguably the best explanation could be the existence of God or at least intelligent designer.  However, there are also many evolutionary explanations for the phenomenon as well.  Next is figuring which is the simplest explanation that also takes into consideration of all known facts.  Abductive arguments never prove that something is objectively true but merely most likely true.  The conclusion is subject to change based on new data that may arise every day.  Only deductive arguments if the premises are true and the conclusion necessarily follows from the premises can give objectively factual conclusions. (Example of a Deductive Argument: If A then B; if B then C, therefore, if A then C).  All of scientific reasoning exists outside of deductive argumentation even scientific discoveries that are blatantly true.

Sorry, I was once a philosophy student, and I hope to return to school again at some point soon (which, by the way. much of my philosophical curiosity stems from my religious background).  My reasons for being a Christian are not objective and not reasons for which you should become a Christian yourself if you are considering the possibility. They are merely justifications for why I consider myself a Christian.  For starters, I deal with intense abandonment issues and chronic feelings of loneliness due to my extensive history of trauma.  The belief in a loving and caring God who will never abandon me has helped fill those gaps.  Of course, that does not mean that I don’t question the reason I have experienced so much evil if such a God exists unless I potentially deny his omnipotence.  That is a valid question.  I remember though, years ago, I was dangerously suicidal and was taken to the hospital. While waiting for a bed to open in the psychiatric hospital, the doctors put me in a secluded room with no intellectual stimulation, just blank white walls, for about 22 hours.  About maybe 16 to 18 hours in and eventually someone gave me a magazine that I would normally not have expressed any sort of interest in except under dire circumstances such as that.  My friend who dropped me off at the hospital is Catholic (one of the good ones) and she gave me a rosary as a source of strength.  I hid it under my scrubs so as the cameras that were watching my 24/7 would not pick it up.  In the room next to me, there was an older man who was belligerent and violent against the nurses.  He made quite a ruckus all night, and it was frankly triggering and disturbing.  I thought I was losing a sense of myself. I clutched tightly to that rosary all night long.  After an ambulance transported me to the psychiatric hospital the next day, two nurses stripped searched me which of course meant that they took the rosary from my hands.  I cried profusely because I felt like that was the only part of myself that I had left. So, there is definitely a sense of identity and strength I get from being a Christian; it is at the very least useful or practical for me to identify as a Christian.  Christianity, particularly the scriptures involving Jesus, is also the reason why I am a leftist today.  It is also surprisingly the reason I became more accepting of the LGBTQ+ community after my extremely conservative upbringing.  Acts describes the early church, pre-Constantine’s conversion in 312 A.D., as being strongly communally based.  People shared food, shelter, and clothing with one another and no one went without.  This strikingly sounds like an anarcho-communist utopia.  The understanding of Jesus as the Son of God was of the upmost importance, and Jesus’ denouncing of the ethnocentric ideology of Jewish religious leaders telling his disciples to go out and tell the world about him brought the gentiles into the community with him.  One of the first recorded converts in the Bible was a eunuch from what is modern Ethiopia.  It was not only a gentile but also a sexual minority.  Jesus had a strong message about community and non-judgmental stance towards others.  He rebuked people who valued power and wealth over other people.  This particularly included the rich, religious leaders, and other people of power.  He told a rich man to give away all his possessions to enter the Kingdom of Heaven which the man left distraught.  He healed the servant of the Roman centurion and it is highly likely according to Biblical scholars that they were in a homosexual relationship given the historical precedent of that time.  Jesus is crucial and central to the Christian faith.  Christianity does not exist without him.  Why else would it be call CHRIST-ianity?  And of course, modern-day Jews and Muslims at the very least recognize Jesus as a great prophet (The Koran also states that Christians and Jews will also be rewarded in heaven alongside Muslims).  What sets Christianity apart is that one of the most basic tenets of Christianity is the belief in the divinity of Jesus Christ.  When looking at Christianity, what is essential is looking through the lens of Jesus when interpreting the rest of scripture, what is human-informed and what objectively divine.  I believe that much of the Bible is divine to an extent but at times grossly misconstrued by human beings.  Christianity has been interpreted in ways in which have wielded immense good and immense harm today.  In other words, it is easy to imagine that this would be true for the history of the Judeo-Christian faith.  It has been used today to justify genocides, but it has also been used to build free clinics for people who do not have access to healthcare (the church I have been attending).  Religion can be extremely dangerous if interpreted in a grotesque way with self-interest plaguing one’s reasoning.  I do not think; however, it is something necessarily intrinsically wrong with religion.

I will probably do more blog posts on this topic, specifically on queerness and the Bible.  With how I interpret the Bible, I can easily justify living openly queer.  I will give a brief synopsis in how I justify the way I live in light of being a Christian.  Most of the verses which speak against homosexuality are in extremely specific sections with absurd rules such as never defend your husband in a fight by grabbing other man’s penis or washing yourself three times after a nocturnal ejaculation.  Maybe, the most substantive verse would be from Paul in Romans and Corinthians; however, Paul has also said that women should never speak in a place of worship which even by most conservative Evangelical Christian standards is too sexist.  We are talking about an extensive history of patriarchy and ethnocentrism, wanting desperately to separate their culture from other cultures by committing genital mutilation and refraining from homosexual acts plaguing the society for many centuries.  The Bible was exclusively written by men in this context trying to interpret something divine.  I do not believe the Bible is inerrant.  The Bible gives little insight in terms of varying gender identities.  It speaks against transvestitism a “crime” one cannot commit if they identify with the gender that they are attempting to express. Transvestitism does not equal transgenderism and equating the two would be an invalidation of a person’s gender identity since you are insinuation that a transgender man for example is really just a woman presenting as a man instead of a man in his own right.  But furthermore, with the increased greater understanding that sexual orientation and gender identity is rooted in one’s being and not a lifestyle which someone follows by their own volition, one must consider the idea of whether anyone could be excluded from Jesus’ community based on some uncontrollable trait.  The obvious answer to this is no, and most conservative Christians would agree with the premise.  However, they either deny queerness is an innate trait, or that it is a mental illness, or a trait that must be suppressed.  The third is absurd, because you would never tell someone to be a specific race in order to be accepted in the Christian community.  It a trans-woman is a woman, then there is no way to change the fact that she is a woman.  Even if she dresses masculine and never medically transitions, she is still a woman. She would actually be cross-dressing technically!  Since gender has to do with one’s internal identity and not necessarily one’s presentation, no matter how much she tries, even if she comes off as a man is not a man. Telling people to suppress their identity has only led to a mental health crisis in the queer community and high suicidal rates.  Is a God who tells people to suppress a portion of themselves that he presumably created for no other purpose but the prospect of getting to heaven one day truly loving?  I would argue not.  I would go as far to say that if you do believe that queer people should suppress themselves, there is the insinuation that God wants to make certain people suffer unnecessarily (unnecessarily is key here, not that we should never have challenges, but we should never have to suffer unnecessarily) and does not truly love certain people.  That last bit is a heretical statement.  

Phew!  That was a lot and thank you for bearing with me through all of it.  Thank you for your time and your patience when reading all of this.  Sorry if it mostly sounded like a bunch of thoughts loosely stringed together.  That is essentially what my life is at this point. I hope from this you may have been able to get a different perspective of what it might mean for someone to be a Christian or why I am still a self-identified Christian.  I also hope that you have been able gain a better understanding of me.  Maybe you have more respect for me or maybe you have lost all respect for me.  Either one is fine.  You may have whatever opinion you want of me.  I have heard it all: delusional, deceived, misled, crazy, etc. That is okay.  It is sad though in the midst of trying so desperately to fight for a completely egalitarian society.  I am comfortable for the most part with the label.  I have found a church that accepts my gender identity using correct name and pronouns.  I had the fortune of being in the church when I came out, so most of the parishioners knew my birthname but still switched out of respect for me at the very least. The official church directory has my preferred name there.  Not every individual is accepting, but the vast majority are including the priest who defended me when someone made some transphobic comments using scripture.  The church has been a source of slow healing for me from all the abuse and trauma I have experienced, and they have helped me during some dark times such as when I was homeless and hungry.  That is what the church is meant to be, a place of safety and love.  I have broken down in tears before during some of the services out of being so overwhelmed by the kindness and acceptance I got from them as opposed to people in my past. In fact, they were more accepting of me than my job who just cut my hours more and I eventually lost the job soon after coming out publicly.  After my abusive ex-boyfriend from back when I thought I was cisgender and straight became a full-blown fascist, I decided to dedicate my life to loving others. This is where it has brought me so far, a staunch Christian leftist.   

[giftofshewbread]

The Slippery Slope of Pseudo Faith

  By Grant Phillips Published on:

October 10, 2017

Have you ever tried walking up hill on packed, slippery ice in the winter time? It’s even worse going downhill. Winter time will be here in a few months or so and we will have the opportunity to test that out.

My son-in-law loves snow, the more the better. I am not fond at all of winter. It’s cold, dead, messy and often quite slick for walking and driving. Another thing I have noticed as I get closer to the upper end of the aging scale is that, at least for me, I pretty much stay cold all winter. You may laugh now, but consider this well-known saying that was supposedly engraved on a tombstone.

“Pause, stranger, when you pass me by: As you are now, so once was I. As I am now, so you will be. So prepare for death and follow me.” An unknown passerby scratched these additional words on the tombstone: “To follow you I’m not content, Until I know which way you went.”

I’ve always liked that, but the funny thing is, it is often true of more than just death; being cold all winter for example.

Any time we walk on snow and especially ice we’re always taking a chance of falling and possibly hurting ourselves. Have you ever wondered why falling down doesn’t hurt a small child as much as a grown adult? My guess is, they’re closer to the ground and don’t have as far to go before they land.

When we were in grade school (that’s what we called it back then) we would slide standing up down a steep slope on our school yard. No fancy sleds. Didn’t even use a shovel or cardboard, just stood up and went for it. It’s fun when you’re young.

One thing that isn’t fun or funny is being duped by Satan about our stance with Jesus Christ. I fear that Satan has many professing Christians thinking they are saved and they are not.

Jesus said, “… when the Son of man cometh, shall he find faith on the earth?” (Luke 18:8)

As of 2012 the polls tell us that 71% of the American population claims to be Christian and 33.4% of those in the world claim to be Christian. I’ve also seen percentages as high as 75-80% for America. These numbers don’t surprise me. Although the percentage rate for Christians throughout the world is probably a truer figure for this country.

I’ve always stated that many will be shocked at the Rapture or upon their death (whichever comes first). Many today, thinking they are a Christian, will be rejected. I am reminded of the following Scripture passages.

“Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it.” (Matthew 7:13-14)

“Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but only the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. Many will say to me on that day, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name and in your name drive out demons and in your name perform many miracles?’ Then I will tell them plainly, ‘I never knew you. Away from me, you evildoers!’” (Matthew 7:21-23)

Why is it that only a few find the narrow gate? There can only be one answer. “… I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.” (John 14:6) Most prefer the wide gate because it allows them to be religious and have nothing changed in their lives. They really don’t want to be “of Christ” since that involves a personal relationship with Him and obedience to His Word. Religion is much better … they think.

Also, Jesus is not saying that works save us. To the contrary, to do the will of the Father is to believe on His Son.

“For my Father’s will is that everyone who looks to the Son and believes in him shall have eternal life, and I will raise them up at the last day.” (John 6:40)

Once real faith is placed in Jesus alone for salvation, he/she will be born again and will produce good works; some 30, some 60, some a 100 fold. Human works are not welcomed prior to being saved. It is by faith alone. But after salvation, works will eventually come forth because the Holy Spirit has taken up residence in the new believer.

True faith will produce works in the Christian life. Will the Christian still sin occasionally? Of course, we still have the sin nature within us (See Romans 7), but no true Christian can remain in sin and not be miserable.

“What good is it, my brothers and sisters, if someone claims to have faith but has no deeds? Can such faith save them? Suppose a brother or a sister is without clothes and daily food. If one of you says to them, “Go in peace; keep warm and well fed,” but does nothing about their physical needs, what good is it? In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead. But someone will say, “You have faith; I have deeds.” Show me your faith without deeds, and I will show you my faith by my deeds. You believe that there is one God. Good! Even the demons believe that—and shudder. You foolish person, do you want evidence that faith without deeds is useless?” (James 2:14-20)

The true Christian will grow in faith and make an honest effort to obey the commands of our Savior and Lord (John 15:14), not legalistically as the scribes and Pharisees, but out of love and gratitude for His mercy.

Most of us in this country are just like many of the Jews in Jerusalem. We’re all in if there is something in it for us, but count me out if it means getting serious about Jesus.

“Now while he was in Jerusalem at the Passover Festival, many people saw the signs he was performing and believed in his name. But Jesus would not entrust himself to them, for he knew all people. He did not need any testimony about mankind, for he knew what was in each person.” (emphasis mine, John 2:23-25)

In the 23rd verse the Scripture says they, “believed in his name.” The Greek word for “believed” is “pisteuo.” In the 24th verse the Scripture says that, “Jesus would not entrust himself to them.” The Greek word for “entrust” is “pisteuo.”

Many “believed” when they saw the miracles, but Jesus knew their “belief” was not real. Both “believed” and “entrust” are the same Greek word. Their faith was false and Jesus had no faith in them. He knew their public acknowledgement of Him was not true faith. It was only a pretense. Read the 24th verse and the 25th verse again.

This is where we are today. Many people are saying they “believe,” but their belief is not real. They’re like a butterfly that lands on a flower for a few seconds, and then it’s gone. They only stick around long enough to please their sweet tooth. They really don’t want to commit to Jesus for the long-term. They’re faith is not real.

These dear folks are the hardest to talk to because they think they’re “alright.” They go to church. They own a Bible. They’ve been baptized. They’ve memorized some religious verbiage that makes them sound holy. They’re okay … they think … but they’re not. They’re on the slippery slopes of pseudo faith. They’re sliding into hell, and don’t even know it. None of these things will save anyone. Only real faith that is committed to Jesus will save anyone.

If we are one of those who say we “believe” in Jesus, are we sure that He “entrust” Himself to us? We may fool each other, but we can’t fool Him.

I will close with the following Scripture, praying that we all take heed. Let us examine ourselves upon against God’s Holy Word and nothing else.

“Examine yourselves to see whether you are in the faith; test yourselves. Do you not realize that Christ Jesus is in you—unless, of course, you fail the test? And I trust that you will discover that we have not failed the test.” (2 Corinthians 13:5-6)

Grant Phillips

[romancatholicreflections]

12th February >> Sunday Homilies & Reflections for Roman Catholics on the Sixth Sunday in Ordinary Time, Year A

Sixth Sunday in Ordinary time, Year A Gospel reading: Matthew 5:17-37 vs.17 Jesus said to his disciples: “Do not imagine that I have come to abolish the Law or the Prophets. I have come not to abolish but to complete them. vs.18 I tell you solemnly, till heaven and earth disappear, not one dot, not one little stroke, shall disappear from the Law until its purpose is achieved. vs.19 Therefore, the man who infringes even one of the least of these commandments, and teaches others to do the same, will be considered the least in the kingdom of heaven; but the man who keeps them and teaches them will be considered great in the kingdom of heaven. vs.20 For I tell you, if your virtue goes no deeper than that of the scribes and Pharisees, you will never get into the kingdom of heaven. vs.21 You have learnt how it was said to our ancestors: You must not kill; and if anyone does kill he must answer for it before the court. vs.22 But I say this to you: anyone who is angry with his brother will answer for it before the court. vs.27 You have learnt how it was said: You must not commit adultery. vs.28 But I say this to you: if a man looks at a woman lustfully, he has already committed adultery with her in his heart. vs.33 Again, you have learnt how it was said to our ancestors: You must not break your oath, but must fulfil your oaths to the Lord. vs.34 But I say this to you: do not swear at all. vs.37 All you need to say is ‘Yes’ if you mean yes, ‘No’ if you mean no; anything more than this comes from the evil one.” ************************************** We have four sets of homily notes to choose from. Please scroll down the page. Michel DeVerteuil : A Trinidadian Holy Ghost Priest, Specialist in Lectio Divina Thomas O’Loughlin: Professor of Historical Theology, University of Wales. Lampeter. John Littleton: Director of the Priory Institute Distant Learning, Tallaght Donal Neary SJ: Editor of The Sacred Heart Messenger ******************************************************* Michel de Verteuil Lectio Divina with the Sunday Gospels – Year A www.columba.ie General comments MountThis Sunday we have the third of the extracts from the Sermon on the Mount. I would advise that you stay with the full passage for this Sunday, even though a “shorter form” is allowed; we never know which section of a passage will touch us or the people with whom we are sharing. The passage lends itself to moralising reading: “Jesus is telling us to…”. We must therefore make a special effort to start from our experience, as always in lectio divina. We ask ourselves the question: when did I experience Jesus telling me these things? The reading then becomes a celebration of moments of grace, teaching through experience. As always, you can remain with one section of the passage, or try to discover – with the heart, not the head – a thread running through the entire passage. Like the whole Sermon on the Mount, this passage describes a conversion experience, “going deeper than the virtue of the scribes and Pharisees”. We need therefore to retrace our spiritual journey, from a “scribe and Pharisee” attitude to one that is “deep” – from a “single-issue” approach to one that is radical and holistic. The rest of the passage celebrates the kinds of implications we become aware of when we experience radical conversion. Our spiritual journey will affect our commitment to Jesus and the church, but also our other commitments – to our families, neighbourhoods, social or political movements we may be involved in. A recent statement by the late St Pope John Paul II is an example of the church’s conversion in its pro-life stance: “To choose life involves rejecting every form of violence, the violence of poverty and hunger, the violence of armed conflict, the violence of criminal trafficking in drugs and arms, the violence of mindless damage to the natural environment.” By giving a broad interpretation to the text, we experience it as wisdom teaching, as Jesus intended it to be. As always in Jesus’ teaching, the language is metaphorical, inviting us to enter it from experiences which we remember with emotion. The sequence of thought may seem haphazard to our Western way of reasoning, but it has its own inner logic. Textual comments The passage can be divided as follows: – Verse 20 is the centre peice of the passage; it explains the verses which precede and follow it. – Verses 17 to 19 are an emotional celebration of “the Law” (here, the term can be taken to mean any noble cause we feel committed to) and of those who uphold it. – Verses 21 to 26: a first series of implications, concerning those with whom we have quarrels. – Verses 27 to 32: a second series of implications, concerning marriage relationships. – Verses 33 to 37: a third series of implications, concerning the taking of oaths. Scriptural Prayer Lord, we thank you for those wonderful moment when something we believed in half-heartedly and from the surface of ourselves suddenly touches us deeply. We move from head to heart conviction, feel passionately committed, see the implications for every aspect of life. Sometimes it is a teaching of Jesus: – we must forgive seventy times seven times – our neighbours and ourselves are linked in a common destiny – the gentle will inherit the earth – only those who mourn will be comforted. At other times it is traditional wisdom: – the importance of family and friendship – love is more powerful than selfishness – we can trust the future. At other times we recognise the full implications of a cause we had given ourselves to: – democracy, feminism, ecology, human rights, non-violence. It is a conversion experience, sudden, unexpected. We are touched, as Jesus was when, in a burst of emotion, he celebrated the greatness of the Law of Moses, exclaiming that not one dot, not one little stroke, would disappear from the Law until its purpose is achieved. Like him, we feel tremendous gratitude for the great people who kept the vision alive and taught it; we feel sad that anyone could think of infringing one of the least of these commandments and teach others to do so. How sad it is, Lord, to see a noble, idealistic enterprise fall into the hands of scribes and Pharisees who follow the letter of the law but go no deeper, so that the enterprise loses its savour, is no longer a city built on a hilltop, ushering in your kingdom. The sign of this happening is that people start being content with the minimum, playing it safe, avoiding evil rather than doing good, concerned mainly with being respectable and making a good impression. In Jesus’ day is was not killing, not committing adultery, not breaking oaths; but Moses’ law, like all authentic renewal movements, intended to do away with – anger and contempt in any form whatsoever, calling one another fool or renegade, – looking at other lustfully, seeing them as objects of conquest who will satisfy our ambition, or compensate for our insecurities, – acting because we feel bound by an external force, in heaven, on earth, in some holy city, even in ourselves, rather than from our inner conviction, our own yes or no. We remember when our virtue too went no deeper than that of the scribes and Pharisees. We thank you that we experienced a conversion, and our priorities are now quite different from what they were. We realise how much we used to be concerned with external rituals. helping othersNow, if brothers or sisters have something against us, we leave our offering on the altar, go and be reconciled with our brothers and sisters first, and then come back and present our offering. We feel a new urgency about living according to our beliefs, it becomes a matter of life or death. We are like litigants who come to terms with their opponents in good time when they are still on the way to the court, for fear that they will be handed over to the judge and be thrown into prison until they have paid the last penny. We thank you that we feel fulfilled and have no problems giving up things we had thought we could not do without: – being popular or surrounded by a group of friends, – making a lot of money, – having our name in the newspapers. We had thought it would be painful to give up these goals, almost like tearing out our right eye or cutting off our right hand. We thank you for the grace of seeing that they were causing us to betray our integrity, that we are better off without them than having them and living empty lives, like people having their bodies intact and being thrown into hell. Lord, we thank you for that person you sent into our lives, that Jesus who brought us to conversion. We pray that we in our turn may bring his meassage of conversion to those we live and work with – our church communities, the great renewal movements of our time, our families, neighbourhoods and schools. ************************************************** Thomas O’Loughlin Liturgical Resources for the Year of Matthew www.columba.ie Introduction to the Celebration The word ‘religion’ conjures up for most people, and indeed us Christians also, two great images. The first is that system of moral ‘do’s and don’ts’ — whether one thinks such rules are a good thing or not. The second is that there are various religious practises that have to be followed: like the rule that we have to go on Sundays. But the message of Jesus, brought out in the gospel, is that we must go beyond these appearances: our actions must be following but must be inspired love; our religious observances cannot be merely formal must open us to mystery of love that is greater that the univ yet which enters every detail of the creation. God's love Homily notes 1. We tend to think of the contents of today’s gospel as a series of little pieces: a rule on this, a rule on that, a bit of theology on some other point. Apart from the fact that this ‘chop-up into sentences’ approach to the gospels is not good exegesis but a variant type of fundamentalism, this approach misses the whole point of the sermon by Jesus. The central point is that the message of the gospel is greater than the sum of its parts. It is not a new rule about this, a change in the rules about something else, and so forth; rather, the message is that God’s love is greater than all, and we are called to respond that love in a complete loving way, not simply by a formalistic fulfilment of regulations. Love always must go beyond ‘box ticking’ or it is not love. 2. This has an effect on how we preach: if we turn the gospel into a series of new regulations, and preach them as such, our preaching is reversing the very point of today’s gospel. This is also the fundamental reason why the shorter form of today’s gospel supplied in the lectionary is so inappropriate. So how can we reflect on the message that love and faith are more than ‘box ticking’? 3. The first point is to state just that: love and faith are more than ‘box ticking.’ We can keep all the rules, but if our lives have not got that spark of love and laughter, then we are not fol­lowing the God of love but the’ great policeman in the sky’. golden rule4. That sparkle of love is what makes the difference between the saint and the intense rule-keeping boor. That sparkle is the ability to see beyond the rules, to glimpse a mystery that is greater than the universe, to glimpse the love of God beck­oning us. 5. But while attention to detail and discipline can train us in keeping the rules, we can only discover how to love through forgiving those who have hurt us irrespective of whether they ask for forgiveness or not, or are repentant or not. We can only discover how to love by helping those in need, whether they ‘deserve’ help or not. We can only discover how to love by standing with those who are oppressed ever if it is dangerous for us. We can only discover how to love by asking the Holy Spirit to enlighten our minds with wisdom. 6. Love is the sparkle of the good news, the joy of being a disci­ple, but it is never the easy option. *********************************** John Litteton Journeying through the Year of Matthew www.Columba.ie Gospel Reflection Golden rule 2People frequently refer to the Sermon on the Mount as being the New Law, replacing the Old Law, and the impression given is that, with Jesus, the rules have been somewhat loosened. Now it can be said that it is love that counts and that the rules take second place. But the error of this opinion is quickly evident when we check the eight Beatitudes at the beginning of the Sermon. Far from making life easier, the Sermon is even more demanding than the Old Law. As God gradually revealed himself to the Chosen People, they began to understand that he loved them and wanted them to enjoy life in the land that he had given to them. In order for this to happen, they were to heed the warnings of the prophets and be faithful to God’s commandments. Therefore, they must not kill. They must not steal. They must be faithful to their spouses and they must not envy their neighbour. Contrary to what some people suggest nowadays, the Chosen People understood that God wanted them to keep his laws because he loved them, and not because he wanted to make them wretched and unhappy. We know this from God’s revelation of his loving nature in biblical texts such as the beautiful story of Hosea, whose love for his prostitute wife was analogous to the love that God had for his headstrong and sinful people. Through the prophets, God continually reminded them of his love, even as he pulled them back from the brink of destruction on many occasions. Indeed, in chapter 5 of the Book of Deuteronomy, we read that it was from God’s love that the Ten Commandments sprang. Before listing the commands, God reminded them: ‘I am YHWH your God who brought you out of the land of Egypt, out of the house of slavery’ (Deut 5:6). During the Sermon on the Mount itself, Jesus told his listeners that he had not come to destroy the Law or the Prophets: ‘Do not imagine that I have come to abolish the Law or the Prophets. I have come not to abolish but to complete them. I tell you solemnly, till heaven and earth disappear, not one dot, not one little stroke, shall disappear from the Law until its purpose is achieved’ (Mt 5:17-18). To understand the implication of this key statement of Jesus, we might reflect that he sought not the end of the Law, not its destruction, but its perfection. Hence in the Sermon, Jesus taught that it is no longer sufficient not to kill one’s neighbour. In future, his disciples would be required to control their anger so that their thoughts were purified and perfected. One by one, this extension of the Ten Commandments to thoughts and motives as well as actions, is found throughout this unique Sermon. Jesus reinforced the idea of Christian perfection by linking it to the worship of God. If his followers desired to approach the altar and, while there, remembered friction with another person or people, they would be expected to leave their gifts at the altar and go to be reconciled first. The lesson for us is clear. This is how seriously God views our human relationships. We cannot hate our neighbour and purport to love God. That is not possible. A much overlooked exhortation in the Sermon concerns prevarication in speech: ‘All you need say is “Yes” if you mean yes, “No” if you mean no; anything more than this comes from the evil one’ (Mt 5:37). The Sermon on the Mount, then, especially each of the Beatitudes, provides us with a rich mine of spiritual treasures that give us much food for meditation. For meditation For I tell you, if your virtue goes no deeper than that of the scribes and Pharisees, you will never get into the kingdom of heaven. (Mt 5:20) *************************************** Donal Neary SJ: Gospel Reflections for Sundays of Year A: Matthew www.messenger.ie The heart of religion This list of some of Jesus’ sayings give an indication of what is important to him. He states the religious tradition of the people when he says that he has not come to abolish the old religion, and that religion must go much deeper and be an affair of the heart. He asks for forgiveness and reconciliation when he speaks about leaving a gift at the altar to go for reconciliation. He com­mends marriage, and faithfulness in marriage, in his views on divorce. He believes in the respect for sexuality that is shown in not using a person. This collection of Jesus’ sayings form a background to how he lived his life himself. He lived out these sayings in many of the events of his life, which we hear about on other Sundays. The Sermon on the Mount, of which this is part, is the backdrop to much of Jesus’ life and mission, a sort of vision statement for his life and ministry. Much of this went against the religious practice of his people, which was centred mostly on externals. He saw the ritual and the law of religion as important only if it came from the heart. This is the challenge always to religion – to live heartily what it enthusiastically believes. Practices in ritual and in religious custom and laws may change with different cultures and times; what is important is the way we live our lives, following Jesus and knowing that all our efforts to live like him are praised and rewarded. Pope Francis says, ‘It is not enough to just respect the commandments and do nothing more. Christian life is not just an ethical life: it is an encounter with Jesus Christ’ (9 May 2016). Repeat a favourite gospel phrase as you breathe in; your outbreath is your thanks for this help in your life. Lord, your will be done each day in my life. discipleship sacrifice 3 9