#this is the happiest ive ever been in terms of art

[spiced-wine-fic]

Twenty Questions for Fic Writers

Thank you so much dear @nocompromise-noregrets 🤗

1. How many works do you have on Ao3?  45

2. What’s your total Ao3 word count? 

2,842,840

3. What fandoms do you write for? 

Tolkien. The Silmarillion. 

4. What are your top five fics by kudos? 

Fragments of Fate and Fire (This one, I don’t tend to count, as it’s mostly art. It’s much easier to look at an image than devote time to reading).

Dark Prince, 

Magnificat of the Damned Book III: Fire.

A Far, Fierce Sky

Magnificat of the Damned Book II: Resurrection. 

5. Do you respond to comments? 

Of course. 😊 (I am grateful for them).

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? 

Magnificat of the Damned Book IV: Anvil. 

And I got some incredible comments on the last chapter that I still cherish. (It was not the end, but it was the end of that series).

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? 

I don’t believe in endings. Stories always continue and mine are mostly part of an ongoing series. But I have written a couple of one-shots and Requital did have a much more positive ending.

8. Do you get hate on fics? 

Never have, no. Or if I have it must have been mild and I’ve forgotten. But then I moderate my fics on AO3 and people usually can't be arsed to type a raging comment that won’t get published. Also I’m just not read that much. I write a lot of OC’s and people tend to scroll past, I’m sure.  (I never had negative comments on LOTRFF.com or Faerie, either, and one couldn’t moderate, but again, I think it was because that kind of person just didn’t bother with them and the atmosphere was more polite on those archives).

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? 

Sometimes. M/M. These days, it’s when it comes up, which is not so often. I find (after a particularly horrible fandom experience) that it’s like salt: you don’t need to pour it over everything. Anyhow, I’m interested in stories which have everything in them, not just sex. 

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written? 

No. 

11. Have you ever co-written a fic before? 

I wrote Dark Prince and Dark Lands with Annwyn (back in 06/07) who I’m still in contact with but is no longer in fandom. She was lovely to write with. 

13. What’s your all time favorite ship?

Fëanor/Fingolfin. 

14.  What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? 

I want to finish A Far, Fierce Sky. I was writing that in tandem with one of the Magnificat stories and as A Light in the East and A Far, Fierce Sky, it’s sequel, were AU’s to my main arc, I had to drop one of them when I became self-employed. 

I no longer have the time to write very much so I hope to survive long enough to retire and be able to do much more 🥺

15. What are your writing strengths? 

Probably perseverance. I can hack through blocks and I completely ignore fandom fads so I can concentrate on my writing without dashing after the next hot take. If I get an idea I’ll follow it through. 

16. What are your writing weaknesses? 

Take your pick! 🤪

17. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? 

If used sparingly it can be effective. 

18. First fandom you wrote for? 

Tolkien. I’m monofandom. 

19.  Favourite fic you’ve written? 

I think of fics in terms of how I felt when I was writing them, and if I was in the ‘zone’ so it is a tie between Dark Prince and  Summerland.  Tagging @cycas @ettelene @nuredhel @naryaflame @pinksiamese @crowandmoonwriting @jane-ways @antares0606 @independence1776 @lucifers-cuvette @minquelie @grundyscribbling @thenookienostradamus @swanfloatieknight @geneeste @auntieaugury @blue-istari-stars-of-the-south @feedthefandomfest and really anyone who sees this and would like to do it.

[agentarcadia]

hello friends! i just discovered that i gained like 120 new followers the last couple of weeks so i wanted to say hi and thank you for putting a smile on my face!! apparently my askbox and messages were closed so yeah now they’re not!

[whoop-de-fuking-do]

Okay tbh, I have no idea what my identity is. I'm debating on dropping all labels and just. Be consumed by the void.

Because like

I havent felt "like a girl" since like 7th grade. like when I came out in freshman year of highschool (9th grade, US) to my friends, they werent surprised? Like they knew before even I did?

I had to get my hair cut due to a lice issue, and it was just above shoulder length when I finally got rid of them. I looked in the mirror and went "Huh, I kinda like short hair." so a few weeks later, my mom took me to a professional hairstylist, and I got a pixie cut- my first actual hairstyle that was different than I ever had before, and I'm the one who picked it out. I was so happy. Then it started to grow out. It was at my shoulders again when I was at my aunts house hanging out, and literally on impulse, my aunt and my mom went "Hey, do you want a haircut?" And of COURSE because I liked my short hair so much I went "HECK YEAH" and so we all went upstairs and basically gave me a buzzcut on the sides and back, but shortned the top. (Don't worry, they checked in with me a lot during this, just to make sure I was happy with the outcome.)

So there was my mohawk.

It was bad, and I could never get it to stand up right, but I was happy. And looking in the mirror with my short as fuck hair, rubbing my hand over the centimeter-length hair, with a big smile on my face, I realized that I looked like a boy and I was much happier with the idea of being called one.

Now, at the time, I was REALLY into Hetalia, and the 2P! characters that the fandom made piqed my interest. I read fanfics. (one that was based off of the Angel beats anime has stuck with me, and made me c r y) I made art I found on google my lockscreen and homescreen. I memorized little facts and designs from the 2p! FACE family. (and typing this, i remember another fanfic with 2p!Canada, where he takes y/n to a hotel and yall are on the run, which in hindsight could have kicked off that one dream I had... anyway.)

I remembered their names. At least the ones I cared about. I never really did care about 2p!France. (although ive fallen for the rest, and his 1p! counterpart.)

Allen Jones. (America)

Mathieu Williams. (Canada)

Oliver Kirkland. (England)

Now, those who know these characters, know what their whole deal is. I don't know why, but I still fall for these types of fictional characters. But that's not important.

I came downstairs, all giddy and happy, and I wizzed around the corner with a smile. Getting ready to leave, they were making remarks like "You're a boy now!" and the like. Now, it was honestly all in fun and games, and they never meant any ill harm, they could see how happy I was. So, while we were gathering our things, I was making remarks like "Haha, I guess you guys can call me Allen now." That got me informed that that was the middle name of a close family member, so oops, can't use that. "Well... call me Mathieu?" Nope, that was a first name of another family member, who I later met a month or two down the road. Different spelling, same pronounciation. I nervously laughed it off, keeping the last name to myself.

Soon after, I realized that I was attracted to boys and girls, when I got asked out by my close friend, and I said yes. She could tell that I liked both from the way that I acted, but I had no idea there was even a term for it.

So, I now identify as a girl(?) and bisexual.

Upon research upon this "Bisexual" term, I learned about others.

Transgender.

Lesbian.

Demi.

Genderfluid.

Genderfluid.

Genderfluid.

That had a nice ring to it, and it fit pretty well what I was feeling at the time.

So.

I wasn't a girl, and that's why I was uncomfortable with she/her pronouns at some times and not others. I liked the idea of having he/him pronouns, and I loved they/them pronouns. Those made me the happiest, and they still do.

I had my girlfriend over for the weekend, and that was in a time of my life where I was out to my friends at school, and I have notified them of the name I liked, Oliver. They were all surpportive, but I never enforced the name change until about two years ago, or halfway through my 11th grade year.

Anyway, it was also a time where I couldn't stand my birth name or pronouns, and I actually physically flinched whenever I got called them. I wasn't out to my grandmother at the time, who I had been staying with for the weekend, so my girlfriend and I went up to my room later on the day and we talked. She brought it up, and I explained just the extent of how it affected me.

1/?

[the-trth-untold]

now its ur turn. do all of the sweetheart asks.

god jsjsjhdjk im just letting u kno these answers r gonna be BORING but hhhh THANK U 

1. Talk about your first love.

i’ve never been in love, never been in a relationship before. BUT i can vaguely remember my first crush back in 2nd grade. all i can remember was that his name was kyle and he was the only boy who ever spoke to me and my brain just went !!! 

2. What’s the most beautiful song you’ve ever heard in your opinion?

Break My Heart Again - FINNEAS or What Was Our Love All About - Adrian Milanio and Marylou Villegas 

these are just two that i can think of there are A LOT of beautiful songs

3. How’s your heart feeling right now?

fine??

4. What kind of self care is your favorite to do?

i dont really do any self care things?? 

5. What’s your skincare routine?

i dont do any skincare routines either... ik im a monster

6. How did you get to be so beautiful?

u must be blind if u think that 

7. Do you have any stuffed animals?

i used to have over 50 stuffed animals, i would always place them all over my bed neatly but i got rid of them now :( 

8. Best trip you’ve ever been on?

Myrtle Beach, SC because it was my first vacation spot and i was so happy seeing two dolphins close to the shore

9. Favorite thing about your room?

the color of my walls and blankets lol mint green and peach colors

i dont have anything cool in my room

10. Opinion on love?

i mean, it’d be nice to experience it some day and i hope i do but right now im content being by myself

11. Are you affectionate?

if i know you very well i can be, if not im very awkward and will barely make any eye contact with you

12. Who do you look up to?

i look up to people who have struggled a lot in their life, people who can be optimistic in any situation

13. Favorite poet?

i dont read much poetry, but i loved reading some things Emily Dickinson has published

14. Song that makes you happy? How about one that calms you down when you’re in a bad place?

honestly any disney song makes me happy! im a huge disney nerd and listening to any of those songs makes me feel nostalgic.

when im in a bad place, any slow, ballad sounding song can calm me down

15. Do you play an instrument?

i played the flute in middle school but dropped it after less than a week LOL

16. Do you do art? Using what (pencil, watercolor, etc)?

i like doing digital art but im not good at it and i dont have adobe illustrator anymore so i haven’t done anything recently

17. Do you dance? What style of dance?

i cannot dance and no one will make me

IM TOO EMBARRASSED EVEN IF IM ALONE HAHAHA

18. What’s your zodiac sign? Do you believe in astrology?

im a libra

i somewhat believe in astrology, i know there’s more to it than just your sun sign and there are different placements that make you different from the stereotypical traits people use for each sign

a lot of the “things about each sign” can be used for anyone because the responses can be very vague and many people can relate to 

19. Favorite old film?

too many

the shining, the breakfast club, carrie, pretty in pink, etcetcetc

20. What’s your hairstyle?

idk its a mess

curly/wavy and i have hardcut bangs 

21. What weather is the most beautiful, in your opinion?

fall weather, where its like 50 F (or 10 C for all u weirdos out there), cold enough to put on a flannel and boots

22. What upsets you most about the world?

i only have two hands but there are so many cats and dogs. i cannot pet all of them. (IM SORRY THIS WAS UR ANSWER DASHA BUT IM KEEPING IT ITS SO CUTE AND FUNNY AND I RELATE)

23. Are you in love right now?

no

24. Do you have a crush? If so, talk about them!

i dont have a crush lol

25. Do you have pets? Talk about something sweet about them!

yes!!! i have two gorgeous puppies!!! if u wanna check them out u can follow my instagram i post them all the time @ the.moon.atomic

they’re such dorks but they fit my household idk how to describe it they just belong in my house hahha

26. Do you have a lucky number?

i dont really believe in lucky numbers 

27. Have you ever wished on a star? What about on a fallen eyelash?

no, and i never heard about wishing on a fallen eyelash haha

28. Do you believe emoji spells to work?

no???????? i dont even know what that is

29. Do you believe in magic in general?

no

30. What’s the most beautiful thing in life, In your opinion?

when people finally stop hiding their true selves, show their real smiles, and laugh so hard they snort 

idk i just love people, well, most anyway sjsjhzjdsk

31. Opinion on the color pink? What about baby blue?

love them 

theyre such pure colors and they just remind me of newborn babies hahaha

32. What instrumental sound is your favorite?

piano definitely

33. Do you like the sound of wind? What about the sound of rain?

yes! yes to both! i love rain more though, sorry wind

34. Who makes you happy?

my friends, family, and my mutuals 

35. What makes you happy?

listening to music

36. Imagine your ideal life, the life you wish to make, what will that look like?

ohh well i’d be living on germany for starters hahaha

id like to have my own house, maybe living with a best friend

definitely like 5784538902 cats and dogs, i love them 

at some point id like to have a relationship LOL

37. Do you wear makeup? If so what’s your favorite type of makeup or specific makeup product? Favorite store to buy makeup? 

only on rare days ill put on makeup, i only use eyeshadow, liner, and mascara and ive never gone to a store thats just for make up, i just go to a pharmacy lol

38. Do you wear dresses? If so what’s your favorite dress you own?

only if i absolutely have to, the dress i wore for my senior pictures is my favorite

39. Ever been heartbroken? How do you deal with it?

noo, ive never been in a relationship 

40. Who’s your closest friend? What do you love about them?

i kinda really dont have one, not irl anyway

@neo-bangtan @mini-pretzel are my closest friends online, i love everything about u guys

41. Introvert or extrovert?

introvert

42. Do you like MBTI? What’s your MBTI?

im isfj

43. Would you be a fairy, a mermaid, a vampire, a siren, or an angel?

uh idk?? i wouldnt want to be immortal so 

44. What’s the best song a friend has ever introduced to you?

acid jazz singer - the fratellis 

45. Parlez-vous français?

no my french sucks

46. Most beautiful place you’ve been to?

honestly i cant think of any place pennsylvania sucks ahhaha

47. Where/when do you truly feel at home?

home...... my bed...... LOL

48. Does smiling put you in a better mood? Try it right now, you’re smile is gorgeous!

only if im not looking at myself lol

49. Favorite shoe you own?

slip ons or my new balance 

50. Can you walk in stilettos? Do you like them?

N O i am so accident prone i can barely walk barefoot without tripping 

51. Do you feel loved?

kinda? sometimes?

52. How do you express love to those you care about?

just giving them a hug lol or saying i love you

53. Favorite term(s) of endearment?

no ones ever called me any but i like baby, im a simple girl 

54. Most romantic thing someone’s ever done for you?

nothing?

55. When is the happiest you’ve ever been?

meeting new people who share the same interests 

56. Are you happy right now?

im pretty neutral atm

57. What makes you smile?

really awful jokes that ARENT EVEN FUNNY AND TALKING DASHA AND KARINA 

58. Do you laugh a lot?

i guess??

59. What’s your favorite kind of aesthetic?

soft vibes i guess haha

60. Do you want to marry for love or for some other reason (like money)?

i dont see myself marrying but if i would it would definitely be for love

61. What would your dream wedding look like? Do you want to get married?

i dont really want to get married, most of the time it ends in divorce and theres just a lot of paper work and its a hassle i dont see a point in it 

62. Favorite flower?

hydrangeas 

63. Favorite artist?

edgar degas

64. Favorite music artist?

bts lol

65. How kind do you think you are? Is kindness important to you?

i try to be kind to everyone, i dont know if others perceive me that way but i think kindness is very important to me

66. Ever made a playlist for someone?

once and i loved it, pls ask me to make a playlist for u

67. Do you have anything you do to physically comfort you when your sad? Such as a favorite blanket? Or a relaxing bath?

music and a soft blanket 

68. Early bird or night owl?

early bird

69. Morning routine?

wake up, look in the mirror, look away from the mirror, go back to bed. (AGAIN THIS IS UR ANSWER DASHA BUT IM KEEPING IT HHAHAHAHA)

70. Night routine?

shower and watch netflix until i fall asleep

71. What is the most lovely quality a person could have in your opinion?

being humble

72. Do you cry often? Does crying help you get the emotions out? Do you feel better after?

yes yes and yes

im such a cry baby i will cry at everything if u yell at me or if disappoint u im so sensitive 

73. Do you like hugs?

yes but i dont receive many hugs

74. When was the last time you kissed someone?

never

75. Are you small or tall?

small, 5′4 or 164cm

76. Do you like wholesome memes?

who doesnt

77. Favorite thing about the past?

anything that makes me feel nostalgic 

78. Do you ever wonder about the future?

yes

79. Have you ever lived in a different country than you currently live in?

nooo

80. Do you like plane flights? Airports?

ive never been on a plane

81. Sunrises or sunsets?

sunsets

82. The beach or a forest?

beach

83. What time of day do you tend to be in the best mood?

when im sleeping lol

84. Do you push yourself to act together and in a good mood even when you aren’t?

i try to 

85. Favorite kind of tree?

what kind of question is this i dont know anything about trees

86. Do you care about the health of the Earth?

i want to but i dont do anything for it

87. What did you like most about your childhood, if anything?

fieldtrips in school

88. Do you read a lot? What’s your favorite book?

i try to read more, my favorite book is more happy than not 

89. What are you most nostalgic for at the moment?

disney, i just put my christmas tree down and the ornaments are disney characters

90. What’s your favorite personality trait you have?

honesty i guess?

91. List at least ONE thing you love about your appearance.

my eyes

92. When was the last time you truly felt calm, without much of anything to worry about?

after i bathe 

93. Do you worry a lot?

yes all the time

94. The dazzling lights of the city or the relaxing countryside?

dazzling lights of the city

95. Ever changed the shoelaces on one of your shoes? For what reason?

no 

96. Favorite pastry?

??????????? i dont know??????????

97. Do you like doing little acts of kindness?

YEAH

98. How’s your day/night going?

fine so far, i dont have to work today so im just chillaxing 

[werewolfwilds]

i redid an ask meme that i had originally done ~3 years ago to see the comparison so for archiving purposes im putting it in a lil journal entry here ! i wanna start doing small journal entries again it was fun when i did that

new answers bolded

1) what images do you have set for your desktop/cell phone wallpapers?

my desktop bg is literally just…. a collage of kageyama manga screencaps a h a,,,, and my cellphone bg are drawings some gay drew me like 74724 years ago :v // my desktop rn is actually a background from one of the dmmd routes LMFAO..... idk which one it is but i’ve always liked those bg pics!! my cell lock screen is p5 art and my bg is leopika

2) have you ever had a crush on a teacher?

nooooope // nah

3) what was your last text message?

my phone is dead so i wouldnt be able to tell you lmfao i dont even remember // it was a gif from kelly lol

4) what do you see yourself doing in 10 years?

hopefully working a job i enjoy and making costumes and being happy!! // god i have no idea and it freaks me out... hopefully working,,

5) if you could be anywhere else right now, where would you be?

hoommee ((or at katsucon tbh)) // at the beach with friends maybe

6) what was your coolest halloween costume?

a white cat probably lmao // i dont think ive ever had a particularly exciting halloween costume but one year i was sharpay from high school musical and i think i peaked then tbh

7) what was your favorite 90s show?

uhhhh….. i didnt really… start watching tv until like… the 2000′s so i really cant tell you man lol // spongebob started in 1999 does that coUNT,

8) who was your last kiss?

(answer redacted) // :/ someone should kiss me so i can change this answer lmao

9) have you ever been stood up?

nope //  nah

10) favorite ice cream flavor?

vanilla w/ vanilla oreos ok u need to underst a n d // this hasn’t changed i haven’t had this particular ice cream in a long time but i still stand by it

11) have you been to las vegas?

nahh // nope

12) your favorite pair of shoes?

idk i have these black ones i wear everywhere lol // i have a pair of white sneakers that i refuse to stop wearing now

13) honestly, have you ever cheated on your significant other?

i wouldnt even consider it. // no bc i’m not a piece of shit lmao?

14) what is your favorite fruit?

hmmm…. pineapple orrr…. strawberries but only if they’re the really good kind like they have to be perfect // pineapple!!

15) have you talked to anyone on tumblr that you could see yourself  dating/having sex with? if possible?

….. ye s… yes. // in the past apparently so but thinking about it now nah lol

16) are you into hookups? short or long term relationships?

hookups arent my thing eh i prefer long term relationships altho i cant really say ive been in a “long” term relationship pffff // i don’t think hookups will ever be my thing, emotionally long term relationships are what i’m here for but i’m also a Very Impulsive Person so i cant tell you if this will stay a fact :’)

17) do you smoke? if so, what?

nope dont wanna // no thanks

18) what do you do to get over your anger?

usually talk to people or shout into word // i have to vent about it to someone probably a thousand times even months or years after it happens tbh

19) do you believe in god?

nahh // nah

20) does the person you’re in love with know it?

i aint in love with anyone rn so no? // i’m not in love with anyone.

21) favorite position?

………….. for w hat………. // oh honey lmfao... N/A

22) what’s your horoscope sign?

virgo/ox ovob // Virgo/sun, Aries/moon, Libra/rising and Cancer/midheaven

23) your fears?

literally everything i already named a few so ill name some others… ghh anything in… the ocean or lakes and stuff frightens me and i really dont know why bu tlike…. fish and crabs and jellyfish and seaweed cuz it’s evil and stu f f basically anything that’s not a mammal or turtles or penguins…. lo l im a baby // uncertainty is a big fear of mine and also people being mad at me lmao... as far as physical fears though i have debilitating fears of almost all insects/arachnids and lobsters/shrimp/crawfish :^)))))

24) how many pets do you have? what kind?

two cats and a dog!! // one cat one dog

25) what never fails to turn you on?

i dunno,,/////// // lol neck biting/kissing oof

26) your idea of a perfect first date?

im okay with mostly anything i just really like spending time with the person ; v ; // i’ve never really had an answer for this? thinking about dates has always made me so anxious for whatever reason but i’ll be happy to just spend time with them doing whatever honestly, i’m a super indecisive person aha

27) what is something most people don’t know about you?

i dont really know tbh lmfao // i’ve considered in the past looking into mental conditions (anxiety/bpd/etc) to see if i might have one or two but i never want to say anything about it because i don’t want to self-diagnose anything.

28) what makes you feel the happiest?

nice weather and nice conversations w/ best people u//v//u // nice weather and hanging out with people who are fun and easy to talk to

29) what store do you shop at most often?

does….. arda wigs count or… // does arda wigs still count bc mood lmao but truthfully now it’s probably target

30) how do you feel about oral? giving and/or receiving?

kkdkjsfkjkjfj??fsfj/// go for i t??? i have no problems with i t??? i dont think ill ever be willing to put a dick in my mouth though // these random sexual questions thrown in here are something aren’t they lmao. not going to disclose much but i will stand by the fact that i will not put a dick in my mouth lo l

31) do you believe in karma?

sometimes ye // i believe that people will eventually get what’s coming to them but i don’t believe in karma as a solid concept if that makes sense? like i don’t think it’s guaranteed

32) are you single?

yup yup // yeah it’s been wild lmao

33) do you think flowers or candy are a better way to apologize?

i think being sincere is the best way to apologize– if you truly mean it the person will know. you dont need to buy your forgiveness. // the best way to apologize is just to apologize sincerely and change your behavior if it’s applicable.

34) are you a good swimmer?

ehh??? im ok i guess– i took swimming lessons as a kid but i havent done legit swimming ever since then lmao,, ive always been best at the backstroke tho yea // i mean i have the ability to swim but i’m not olympic-worthy or anything lmao

35) coffee or tea?

ehhh im not big on either tbh // chocolate milk and you can fight me

36) online shopping or shopping in person?

depends what your shopping for i guess?? online is more relaxed i guess // online probably because shopping in person Gives Me Anxiety

37) would you rather be older or younger than your current age?

ehhh im happy where i am tbh // older

38) cats or dogs?

do not make me choose // cats and dogs* there i fixed it for you

39) are you a competitive person?

ahaa,,,,, oh god yeah,, // OOF yeah

40) do you believe in aliens?

i believe there’s life on other planets somewhere?? so i guess?? // i believe in aliens in the sense that there’s no way we are the only living life forms in the universe but not in the science-fiction way you feel me

41) do you like dancing?

i do but i suck at it lmao // i do but i: A- suck, and B- have no stamina

42) what kind of music to you listen to?

nearly everything tbh // i’m not picky when it comes to music but imma be real w u. almost all of the music on my phone is kpop. seventeen is my favorite group along with astro, and i also enjoy super junior, shinee, red velvet, etc among so many others,,, im pretty wide spread !

43) what is your favorite cartoon character?

i will never be able to pick just one // i’ll literally never be able to answer this

44) where are you from?

philadelphia uvu // philly!

45) eat at home or eat out?

hmmm at home. // at home

46) how much more social are you when you’re drunk?

i never plan on being drunk tyvm // i’ve never consumed alcohol in my life and to be Quite Fucking Honest i want nothing to do with it

47) what was the last thing you bought for yourself?

bracelets ! ; u ; // uh... excluding food and music... earrings i think

48) why do you think your followers follow you?

uhhhhhhh lmfao i have no idea i think… a good amount are for my cosplays at least?? or id like to think so lmfao but i really dont know pfft // my followers have just accumulated and hung around over the years... i know i gained a good amount from my snk days as arlert-the-troops and then through my haikyuu phase, whether it was for my cosplay or other posts that i made... whenever someone follows me now im not entirely sure what its for but i appreciate everyone who’s stuck around!

49) how many hours do you sleep at night?

it’s never regular man // 6-9 (lol) hours is pretty normal for me

50) what worries you most about the future?

everything tbh // the future as a concept worries me lol

[golden-teddie]

I’m a little nervous about posting this here coz its going to be quite a bit of personal stuff being said, and I know that sort of thing is frowned upon so I apologise but this is something ive wanted to get off my chest for a while now so here goes.

I’m going to admit… These past few months have been the best in my entire life and I am the happiest I ever have been for years.

About 6-7 months ago, I was extremely miserable and listless, no confidence in myself, no confidence in my art; i actually hated drawing coz i was so demotivated, and drained of energy because of the dead end job I was in at the time. I didn’t even want to get out of bed half the time, that’s how crappy I felt.

But now I’m a lot more positive about things , have much better self confidence, I’m hell of a lot more happier with my art and actually WANT to draw, and i have a job that has a promising future and it never gets boring once. I have a few people/groups to thank for this and I’m going to list them below with reasons why (going clockwise from the drawing but saving the actual first one of them til last :P)

1. FNAF fandom - Now some of you may groan at this, but this was the first ‘proper’ fandom i was in back when it was super popular, and it was real good fun and i felt accepted! Most of them are lovely people and its got some pretty sweet artwork.

2. Jacksepticeye - This loveable Irish bean is so energetic and positive regardless of how he feels and i respect him so much for that and his content is always entertaining and keeps me company sometimes when I’m home alone or finishing work early, kind of tried to ‘adopt’ his mentality from him (in terms of being more positive not screaming at games lol) The community for the majority is super nice and friendly almost all the time too!

3. Itsmellslikehonor and his fans/subs - This awesome guy is really cool Youtuber, despite being mainly FNAF related and GMOD content, but he always finds time play with his fans and subs on GMOD and that’s really awesome, and its so much fun! It keeps me company whenever I feel lonely at night too, takes my mind off things. If you’re a BIG FNAF or GMOD fan I’d recommend subscribing to him :)

4. FinestElite, Pocket-the-time-lord, and Xiamtheferret - These amazing artists are the main reason I took up drawing again, their individual and unique art styles are so inspiring and motivating and they’re all really nice people too, go follow them if you’re not familiar with them already! FinestElite is both on Tumblr and FA (his FA is FinneyFox though I believe) Pocket-the-time-lord has Tumblr as well, and Twitter (by the name @lpsoneill) and Xiamtheferret has FA (don’t know about anywhere else)

And finally, each and every single person on the Amino groups I’m a part of, specifically the Furry Amino. The communities are so welcoming and supportive, and everyone’s art and I MEAN everyone’s is really good and inspiring to look at! When I made my first post about requests on the Furry Amino I was seriously shocked and completely overwhelmed over the amount of responses I got within a day of posting it, I wasn’t even expecting to get 1 person asking let alone 10-20! And the compliments I got from people really made me feel like my art mattered and it’s given me the encouragement I needed to draw at a more consistent basis.

To wrap this all up, I don’t think I can ever say this enough; Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Each and every single person/group I’ve mentioned mean the absolute world to me for getting my life to a point to where I’m actually happy with it. Honestly, thank you from the bottom of my heart.

(Well done if you read this whole thing xD sorry i know it’s a bit rambly and some of you may think “ew. A furry.” especially in the JSE, ISLH and FNAF communities, but I wanted to make sure I voiced my sincere and genuine thanks to everyone <3 Thank you for reading and I hope you have a lovely rest of your day/evening/whatever)

[shipsthatcouldshowyouthestars]

1-98 coward

Talk about your first love: bet ok my first crush was my cousin’s best friend but like my first real love>>> i love i love i love you so much

What’s the most beautiful songs you’ve ever heard in your opinion?: bright by echosmithhhh

How’s your heart feeling right now?: really light for once, which feels nice

What kind of self care is your favorite to do?: just writing with my feelings

What’s your skincare routine?: god fuck i dont take care of myself

How did you get to be so beautiful?: IM NOT well probably the drugs

Do you have any stuffed animals?: yes oh my god

Best trip you’ve ever been on?: honestly my trip to georgia was so nice

Favorite thing about your room?: so rn im residing in the basement and i love having the cat there

Opinion on love?: love is so good

Are you affectionate?: YES

Who do you look up to?: my nana

Favorite poet?: uhhhhhhh i dont know

Song that makes you happy? How about one that calms you down when you’re in a bad place?: happy: climate change from firebringer. calm down: i just put on the rogues medley and pray that i can calm down at this rate

Do you play an instrument?: no

Do you do art? Using what (pencil, watercolor, etc)?: i cannot draw or art to save my life

Do you dance? What style of dance?: i do what you call bad dance

What’s your zodiac sign? Do you believe in astrology?: im a taurus , kind of believe

Favorite old film?: TKAM TKAM TKAM

What’s your hairstyle?: my signature is actually a ponytail, but i do a half up half down quite often

What weather is the most beautiful, in your opinion?: sunny summer mornings

What upsets you most about the world?: fuckin hate and bad people and mean parents

Are you in love right now?: y e s 

Do you have a crush? If so, talk about them!: well u see my crush is actually my boyfriend and i adore you so much

Do you have pets? Talk about something sweet about them!: i have 2dogs. emily is so fuckin soft and she hides under my bed whent hings get loud or she misses me. pepper literally climbs on top of me when i get home. and i have 1 cat, cash , who lies in bed with me

Do you have a lucky number?: 524 or 624

Have you ever wished on a star? What about on a fallen eyelash?: yes and yes

Do you believe emoji spells to work?: i dont know

Do you believe in magic in general?: a little bit

What’s the most beautiful thing in life, In your opinion?: love, happiness

Opinion on the color pink? What about baby blue?: pINK I LOVE PINK and baby blue is pretty

What instrumental sound is your favorite?: wind wind wind soft sind

Do you like the sound of wind? What about the sound of rain? wild: es rain: no, it makes me really upset?

Who makes you happy?: ollie, cam, my friends irl, my family 

What makes you happy?: im so easy to make happy,,,,i love getting good grades

Imagine your ideal life, the life you wish to make, what will that look like?: god,,,,i’d have a little farmhouse, in sort of the country, i’d have a couple kids and some dogs, id be married, i’d have some fruits i grow,,,,

Do you wear makeup? If so what’s your favorite type of makeup or specific makeup product? Favorite store to buy makeup?: i very rarely wear makeup. my fave is red lipstick, i get from ulta a lot

Do you wear dresses? If so what’s your favorite dress you own?: my fave dress is this red one ive got, it’s super pretty, but i dont have it anymore

Ever been heartbroken? How do you deal with it?: ive been heartbroken, but not in the romantic way..i didnt deal with it very well

Who’s your closest friend? What do you love about them? my closes friend is my friend abby. shes been my best friend for 8 years now. i love how energetic and friendl she is. she doesnt care what others think. 

Introvert or extrovert? ambivert

Do you like MBTI? What’s your MBTI? kind of, im an ENFP

Would you be a fairy, a mermaid, a vampire, a siren, a or an angel? FAIRY

What’s the best song a friend has ever introduced to you? it’s gonna sound so funny, it was the schuyler sisters

Parlez-vous français? a little bit, i can read simple stuff and kind of understand

Most beautiful place you’ve been to? my cousin’s town. everythign about it makes me happy.

Where/when do you truly feel at home? camp.

Does smiling put you in a better mood? Try it right now, you’re smile is goreous! i just smiled thank you

Favorite shoe you own? my crocs

Can you walk in stilettos? Do you like them? god i cannot walk in refular shoes how am i expected to walk in stilettos

Do you feel loved?  i think so

How do you express love to those you care about? it’s all i can express, love--i try my hardest to express it through everything

Favorite term(s) of endearment? baby, love, honey, sweetie

Most romantic thing someone’s ever done for you? literally,,,,love me for me? and also to calm me down if i was spirallng

When is the happiest you’ve ever been? i think it was this summer, i won an award at camp and it made me happy.

Are you happy right now? yeah

What makes you smile? a lot

Do you laugh a lot? i do

What’s your favorite kind of aesthetic? soft soft soft

Do you want to marry for love or for some other reason (like money)? love.

What would your dream wedding look like? Do you want to get married? i wanna get married. i never thought about my wedding.

Favorite flower? red roses

Favorite artist? van gogh

Favorite music artist? i dont know,,,

How kind do you think you are? Is kindness important to you? i think i can be kind. it’s really imprtant to me.

Ever made a playlist for someone? i have i have

Do you have anything you do to physically comfort you when your sad? Such as a favorite blanket? Or a relaxing bath? physically? if im with friends, i just want hugs,,,,but if im alone, idont really have anything

Early bird or night owl? early bird

Morning routine? coffee

Night routine? procrastiate sleep

What is the most lovely quality a person could have in your opinion? kindness

Do you cry often? Does crying help you get the emotions out? Do you feel better after? i dont cry often i hate crying crying makes me anxious

Do you like hugs? i love hugs

When was the last time you kissed someone? ive never had my first kiss

Are you small or tall? i am tiny

Do you like wholesome memes? yes

Favorite thing about the past? what i looked like

Do you ever wonder abou the future? yes yes yes

Have you ever lived in a different country than you currently live in? no

Do you like plane flights? Airports? i havent flown since i was 9, but yeah

Sunrises or sunsets? sets

The beach or a forest? beach

What time of day do you tend to be in the best mood? morning

Do you push yourself to act together and in a good mood even when you aren’t? yes, i try

Favorite kind of tree? pine!!

Do you care about the health of the Earth? YES

What did you like most about your childhood, if anything? god i was so,,,,motivated

Do you read a lot? What’s your favorite book? i used to read a lot, but as ive gotten older, ive struggled, i love little women

What are you most nostalgic for at the moment? summer

 What’s your favorite personality trait you have? i honestly, truly hate my personality.

List at least ONE thing you love about your appearance. my hair color

When was the last time you truly felt calm, without much of anything to worry about? honestly like an hour ago

Do you worry a lot? yes, my anxiety is all worry

The dazzling lights of the city or the relaxing countryside? country

Ever changed the shoelaces on one of your shoes? For what reason? no

Favorite pastry? tiramisu

Do you like doing little acts of kindness? yes

How’s your day/night going? todays been one of the best days in a long time.

[moonprincessvhstapes]

word vomit -read if you please i guess

I hate being surrounded by people who probably think I’m a nuisance and can’t do anything right. I think one of the worst things for my self confidence has been becoming a drum major, and yet it’s afforded me some things I couldn’t live without. I’ve had people be down my back from day one criticizing my every move, and it’s never been people “I shouldn’t care about” it’s always the people who I thought would support me most. I thought things would be different from last year with how horrible a singular person treated me but now things are bordering on worse. At least last year there was a “villain” somebody with clear cut malicious intent that could be blamed and you could go “yep it was them” but its different this year. People who were supposed to come out of the dark with me ended up pushing me farther in while it feels like they get to leave. I get nagged on for everything. everything. I don’t understand. I’m one of band directors favorites, or at least I tell myself that because he’s also one of my favorite people and has helped me through a lot so i think i just want to think that. I’m president of my music honor society, I get nagged about that all the time even though im doing better than last years president. and a drum major, who is inept at being a leader i suppose. the one my band director used to go to all the time. Now I feel like ive been pushed out of the frame and i do nothing! And i think a lot of its in my head but my fellow high leadership nag me so much about every little thing and its like!! I guess i can’t do anything. Im a child incapable of individual thought and agency. And the worst part is theyre my friends. They arent bad people, they take care of me. Which is why i can’t and probably never will say anything.It feels like a circle of debt. How can i be unhappy with them when they buy me snacks, or drive me places. They’re more like extensions of parents at this point because i just get nagged so much. They argue everything i do or say. Im always wrong. Ill always be wrong, when am i not wrong? Ill never know. I make them laugh so they keep me around. Im like a court jester who they drag around and when im not making them laugh at a time that suits them im a fucking dipshit! That’s all I am.

And ive been pushed out and away from the one person who made my four years of high school bearable. It’s dumb but im super sad I dont hang out with my band director like i used to. Theres always so many people in his office all the time and i can never get a moment, but when I do it always boosts me up and im my happiest ever when im just hanging out with him. I feel empty when I make other people laugh, but my comedic qualities never feel soul sucking around him. Im happy to make him laugh!! He’s the true mentor I never had growing up. My parents christened themselves as examples of what not to do, though they still inspire me and have positive qualities and traits ill pick up. But my bd (band director) was the person I saw and said “I want to be like him when I grow up” and now it feels like im not special to him anymore. Like its stupid, hes a teacher ill stop talking to in essentially a month when i graduate but the thought of not having him around is unbearable. My band room used to be home but its not very much like that anymore. My bd is the best ever because I feel like he believes in me. He always tells me I need more confidence because he says he knows i can do more and be more. That means the world to me. I just couldn’t hurt him or break his heart though by telling him that the reasons my confidence is an empty shell of what it was because im in band right now and the people surrounding me. I just cant do anything right. I dont mind criticism, it is necessary, I understand it is, but everything. Everything is argued. I cannot do anything right, no good is done by me. 

And my friends can be under the guise of “we just want to help/we care/etc.” all they want but every time. every time i say or do anything. im never right. its grating and draining. theyre grating and draining. I bet if they saw this right now theyd just correct my grammar and disregard everything else, despite my writing this fervently with hot tears, because thats pretty symbolic of how things are for me right now. I think im not as effective of a leader as i used to be anymore either because theyve pushed me out of my spot. Not literally or even in the context of my band/clubs leadership. Like mentally and emotionally. Like i dont do things like i used to because im so used to being wrong or argued or something. I dont trust myself like i used to. WHich is why my bd always tells me to  be more confident but he doesnt know why im not. I cant do anything right. I dont want to hang around them anymore. 

They also make fun of me for my interests. theyre into cool and worldly shit like space and science but i like music. Music is the one thing im good at. Im of the best in our band and dammit i am fucking better then them at music but they still argue me on my music. i tried to give a presentation in english class about music in poetry one day and my one friend tried interjecting with music shit that they thought they knew but i ended up correcting them back DURING my presentation because i was talking to inexperienced people and i didnt want to spread misinformation. And yet they didnt interrupt anybody elses presentation. And like I cant like my anime or my art stuff without it being written off as stupid all the time. Like i use the term weaboo/weeb all the time and it never really bothers me except from them because anytime at all i mention something about anime/manga its immediately “Lol weeb” so i just dont talk about a very big thing that makes me happy. But they never shut up about space or science, and i listen because its noble, its cool to be into space and science, but the arts are just wholly less important i guess. I just live my life around them written off, useless. They “take care of me” so i dont talk back but if they knew how i really felt which theyll never understand, theyd know im just floating along. Its their world and i live in it i guess. I can feel them peeling away from me and just being friends with each other, and im not even mad about it. I hope it happens, theyre probably better for each other than they are with me at all and i hope i find people in college who will listen to me. 

i know its unfair to blame them for not understanding when i also say im not going to tell them anything, but theyve set a precedent in the past for not listening, its not like i havent tried. I just think things have run their course. 

I love music, my bd is the main reason i want to be a music teacher like him, the kids i teach at the middle school are also reasons i want to teach music. I just want to leave school already and then maybe i can start rebuilding myself into what i used to be. Just a humorous person who loves music. 

[catastrophic-creation-blog]

love?

lately ive been seeing lots of osts about staying strong in times of hardships but not man about my more hippie followings and i just saw a post and it basicly said that if you keep puting out love into the universe it will eventually find its way back to you even if not in the time frame you thought to begin with and this made me think today i went swimming and had a great day with my teacher and and friend from school we do small group outings and we went to the ymca my teacher and i were talking and she has a phycoligy degree and i told her about when i was younger than nine how i had a swimming party at the ymca and how theyre was a boy nick who came to my party and he couldnt swim he brought his swim stuff but had never been taught to swim and i would swim for a while then check on nick and be like nick if you want to come swim you can id stay in the shallow end with you and maybe i could teach you some strokes swimming has always been my happy place and ive always wanted to share that happy place with people today my teacher lets call her E E said finn not many kids that young would take time out of their day to help another kid and ive been thinking about it for a while but all ive ever put out into the world is as much good as i could no matter how many people threw my niceness back in my face i always had hope for another person ive only had one friend that stayed long term his name is jonathan and he has autism mental retardation and fragile x sydrom the more i think about life the more i see how the universe tested me and pushed me i was the “ happiest kid alive” from the day i was born until about age 11 and from the day i was born i wished the best for every one i remember wishing on birthday candles and wishing flowers for love love was the big thing i wanted even when i was the happiest kid alive when i was about 11 i started slowing down rapidly my depression was setting in more and more by the day by age 12 my psychcatrist doctor ordered that i do not attend school i didnt go to school from age 12 to 15 when i was 15 they found my miricale drug but very quickly i realised what had been happening when i wasnt really there within a month of finding my miricale drug i was put into foster care and i gave nothing but kindness to everyone there theyre were all kinds of kids some days wed have 3 fist fights break out and id have to take the little kids and lock us in the art room so no one would try and take their anger out on and 11 year old having a panic attack i just kept putting love into the air putting light into the world with every breath i get out and witin 2 years of getting out im sexually assulted i have trauma from it still but i dont think hes really that bad of a person and i find a silver lining as i always do now i can help other people who have been sexually assulted too i am soon 17 and i work from the moment i wake up to the moment i go to bed because i live with my mom again i wake up go to school until 2-2:30 get on the bus until 2:30-3 then start my shift at my job making money i dont have many people who treat me human there but greatly apprecaite the ones who do i just keep pumping out all the love i have to offer into the world one day a coworker and i message and she says you remindme of my cousin her cousin and i date for about a week we dont click at all then his sister messages me and he says dont talktoher shell tell you things i dont want you to know i say fuck that i talk to who i want and start talking to her and make a connection unlike ive ever had with anyone ever in my life she just gets it i break up with brother and date huntyr for so long ive been trying to pump out enough love for some to cirule back to me to have someone cherrish me half as much as i cherrish every person i meet vaulue me highly respect me and for a long time i didnt think i was going to live to be 18 my 18th birthday is in 18 days and im still a little bit confused how i got here how i got the girl of my dreams and she just turned 17 and i am about to turn 18 she is the first time ive invsioned the future every timebefore her in my life i saw my self ending by my own hands before i would be a man now ihave the kind of feeling that only fears death because theyres just not enough time i want to spend every moment with her ive spent so much time with her over the last 11 months and i have been faced with so many hte fulled people who tried to teach me how to full my heart with hate and then every spot that feels a little bit empty using hate like duct tape sealing over any cracks so i wont crumble but isntad i chose to let the weak spots be extra fausets to let my love drip out of every vulnerable part of me exposed to let more people feel this contagious feeling of happiness and love and i think im to a point in life where its not “i will be genuinly happy finally IF “ and have finally found the reason i have needed to shine so brightly when people are in our own fogs and funks of life we need to have a lighthouse to guide us to each other so when i let the rays of my inner love and happiness seap out of me and grow into someting beautiful she can see it too i feel like ive been in a forest for a long time just going you know how if someone drops you off in the middle of the forst without anything you just keep going one direction because forest doesnt last forever you dont know what will great you when you reach the edge you just know that forests will not go on forever thats whatlife has been for so long not knowing why i keep moving why when that i have enough energy to shine like a light house i do and why i wake up in the morning i think this feeling is what ive been waiting for i feel like i could live with out everything excet her i feel like selling everything i own to make more room for her more roomto hold her more room to dance when no ones watching more room to kiss her softly and make her know she is the true one for me . when you make a scientific mind belife in soul mates thats a great task in itself but making her believe in soul mates AND that your her soul mate is something beautful 

[theo-ramsay]

theo

BASIC STATISTICS

FULL NAME: Mateo Olivier Ramsay NAME ORIGIN: Ask my mom, bruh...oh wait. NAME MEANING: “gift from God” NICKNAMES: Theo, it’s what I go by. Almost no one knows that it’s short for Mateo. NICKNAME ORIGINS: A neighbor, actually. I came home from the hospital and she couldn’t remember my name so she just kept calling me Theo. SEX: Male AGE: 24 BIRTHDAY: March 26th, 1990 PLACE OF BIRTH: Seattle, Washington ETHNICITY/NATIONALITY: Caucasian SEXUALITY: Bi, preference is men. RELATIONSHIP STATUS: Single and definitely mingling. POLITICAL ALLEGIANCE: Liberal CRIMINAL RECORD: I once was hauled in for vandalism when i was but a teenager. spent one night in jail then my mom came and got him

PHYSICAL APPEARANCE

HEIGHT: 6′0″ WEIGHT: 190 lbs EYE COLOR: Blue NEED GLASSES/CONTACTS? Yes HAIR COLOR: Blonde DISTINGUISHING FEATURES: Jaw SCARS: I has one on my back from falling on a skateboard and a couple on my arm from a hospital visit after a terrible terrible IV experience. TATTOOS: ‘my oh my’ written on his back in a mariners logo, I has a couple others I’ve designed for Barry and Alex.  WHO DOES S/HE TAKE AFTER?: I'd like to think my mom but I got my hair color and jawline from my dad. LEFT OR RIGHT-HANDED?: Right

EVERYDAY BEHAVIORS/HABITS

ADDICTIONS: Erm. Adrenaline maybe. MORNING ROUTINE: I wake up at 5, showers and primps for the day, goes into the shop to assist his baristas during peak, does the order and calls in any mechanical problems AFTERNOON: eats lunch, paperwork mostly and other behind-the-scenes things he has to do for the shop EVENING ROUTINE: gets the evening crew set up, goes home to Barry SLEEP HABITS: I cuddle anything within arm’s reach when I’m sleeping DOES THIS CHARACTER SNORE? surprisingly, no. ANY SPECIAL TALENTS OR SKILLS? I'm an artist over a few mediums but my favorite is definitely visual. painting, spray-paint, shit like that. WHAT IS S/HE PARTICULARLY UNSKILLED AT? Math HOBBIES: I fucking love baseball and i’ll pick up his guitar every now and again when i finds time

LIFE

CURRENT ADDRESS: Manhatten, New York DOES S/HE RENT OR OWN? Rent DOES S/HE LIVE WITH ANYONE? IF SO, WHO? Barry, Alex, Boo BRIEF DESCRIPTION OF HOME: Tiny and packed with everyone’s things, it’s a   jungle in there WHAT IS THEIR BEDROOM LIKE? I share one with Barry and the bed takes most of the room. DOES S/HE DRIVE? IF SO, WHAT CAR? i’ve never learned how to drive. SPOUSE/PARTNER: ....Barry CHILDREN: None. WHAT IS THIS CHARACTER’S RELATIONSHIP WITH HIS/HER CHILD(REN)? N/A PETS: does the toddler count? OCCUPATION: Owner of the Mudhouse which right now kind of feels like a glorified barista JOB SATISFACTION: It’s...very hard owning a small business right now. You gotta want it and god damn it, you gotta work around the clock for it. INCOME: Enough to get by. GENERAL HEALTH: I have diabetes but don’t worry ya’ll, I still have all my toes and shit, PAST HEALTH PROBLEMS, IF ANY: other than problems managing my diabetes when I was younger? not really much.

FAMILY OF ORIGIN

FATHER: Anthony Burke FATHER’S OCCUPATION: Lawyer? Accountant? I dunno man, he wears a suit I think? Whatever, go ask him. MOTHER: Cassidy Burke MOTHER’S OCCUPATION: She was an art teacher. DID THE CHARACTER’S PARENTS RAISE HIM/HER? IF NOT, WHY? My mom raised me. Why? Uh, because my dad’s a coward? ARE THE CHARACTER’S PARENTS STILL TOGETHER? IF NOT, WHY? No, because he’s a dick and she’s dead. DOES THE CHARACTER LIVE WITH HIS/HER PARENTS? No DOES THE CHARACTER HAVE SIBLINGS? No HOW HAS THIS CHARACTER’S RELATIONSHIP WITH THEIR SIBLINGS CHANGED SINCE CHILDHOOD? N/A DESCRIBE HIS/HER FAMILY LIFE AND DYNAMIC WHILE GROWING UP: I remember it being pretty fun but real tough sometimes when money got tight, my mom had me when she was 17 and essentially raised me alone but she never really let me know we were in any trouble when I was really young.  I spent a lot of it just kind of running around Seattle causing trouble with neighborhood kids. My dad sometimes would pop in and out if he was feeling guilty about leaving but surprise, he’d always leave again.

THE PAST

HOMETOWN: Seattle, WA DESCRIBE HIS/HER CHILDHOOD: I’d say it was pretty fun. EARLIEST MEMORY: I remember the opening for a news broadcast when I was toddler-age. HAPPIEST MEMORY: Not sure I have one. Not that my life is sad or anything but I think that the best is coming so I don’t wanna commit. SADDEST MEMORY: When my mom died, I would never wish that 48 hours on my worst enemy. MOST EMBARRASSING MEMORY: I bought the Mudhouse when I was off my face and I straight-up forgot for like, a week. MOST IMPORTANT EVENT IN THE CHARACTER’S LIFE THAT STILL AFFECTS HIM/HER AND WHY/HOW: Once I was on the plane to Florida after my mom’s funeral, I kinda knew that it was like, the start of a new life. It was a very hard 48 hours. my life in Seattle feels so far away now HOW MUCH SCHOOL DID S/HE ATTEND? DOES S/HE LIKE SCHOOL? I, um, got into NYU’s visual art program but I couldn’t afford it...never considered going back. WHAT IS THE WORST THING THIS CHARACTER HAS EVER DONE? I’d rather not say.

EMOTIONAL CHARACTERISTICS

MORAL ALIGNMENT: Chaotic Neutral FOUR TEMPERAMENTS: Choleric. SPONTANEOUS OR STRUCTURED? Spontaneous HOW HAS THIS CHARACTER MOST CHANGED FROM YOUTH? A little more focused when it’s time to be and he’s better about being honest about his emotions. HOW HAS THIS CHARACTER REMAINED THE SAME? Still incredibly impulsive and doesn’t always consider consequences. Still kinda reckless.

RELATIONSHIPS WITH OTHERS

WHO IS HIS/HER BEST FRIEND? Barry and Alex ANY SECRET ATTRACTIONS/CRUSHES: None FIRST CRUSH/ROMANTIC LOVE: Can’t remember CURRENT GIRLFRIEND/BOYFRIEND/SPOUSE: ....BARRY! PEOPLE S/HE DISLIKES: No one, really? I don’t know man, it’s hard holding a grudge. HAS S/HE LOST TOUCH WITH ANYONE SIGNIFICANT IN HIS/HER LIFE? IF SO, WHY? People move, people change. HOW MANY PEOPLE HAS S/HE DATED? DESCRIBE EACH RELATIONSHIP. Okay, FIRST OFF, we’re absolutely not doing this because I would literally be talking all fucking day. I’ve slept around a bit.

SEX/ROMANTIC LIFE

WHAT DO THEY CONSIDER TO BE A ROMANTIC DATE? Art gallery showing or a gig. Anytime I open up my art. HOW DOES A NORMAL DATE GO FOR THIS CHARACTER? Normally I just goes with someone to a bar and then fall into bed with them. Not really a dater. HOW WOULD THEY LIKE TO PROPOSE OR BE PROPOSED TO? I’d make a huge fucking deal out of it. I can be a little, as the kids say, dramatic. VIRGIN? hahahahahaha no. DESCRIBE HIS/HER SEX LIFE: Man, the man is non-stop. HOW OFTEN DOES THIS CHARACTER HAVE SEX? Once every couple of days at the absolute least. HOW LONG CAN S/HE GO WITHOUT SEX? Like a week. Or else I get cranky. HOW DOES THIS CHARACTER FEEL EMOTIONALLY AFTER SEX? Normally I try to slip out after sex but most of the time I’m just relaxed. DOES SEX PLAY AN IMPORTANT ROLE IN HIS/HER RELATIONSHIP? Not as much as I thought. TOP OR BOTTOM? Flexible. Most times I’m with dudes I like being a bottom. DOMINANT OR SUBMISSIVE? I find myself being more submissive lately. WHAT WAS HIS/HER FIRST SEXUAL EXPERIENCE? IS IT A POSITIVE OR NEGATIVE MEMORY? It was painfully average. HAVE THEY EVER IMPREGNATED SOMEONE, OR BEEN IMPREGNATED? Not that I...know of. HAVE THEY EVER HAD INTERCOURSE OR A SEXUAL EXPERIENCE WITH THE SEX IN WHICH THEY ARE NOT ATTRACTED? No.

MENTAL ATTITUDES/PERSONAL BELIEFS

MYERS BRIGGS PERSONALITY TYPE: ENFP ANY PSYCHOLOGICAL ISSUES?  ENNEAGRAM: #7 - The Enthusiast KNOWN LANGUAGES: English SELF-CONFIDENCE: I’m the hottest piece of ass in any room and I damn well know it. OPTIMIST OR PESSIMIST? Can be a little pessimistic...is there a word for kinda both? EXTROVERT OR INTROVERT? Extrovert. EMOTIONAL OR LOGICAL? Very emotional. PATIENT OR IMPATIENT? Impatient. COMPASSIONATE OR SELF-INVOLVED? Self-involved. WHAT DOES S/HE LIKE MOST ABOUT HIM/HERSELF? Confidence. WHAT DOES S/HE LIKE LEAST ABOUT HIM/HERSELF? Recklessness. WHOM DOES S/HE REALLY LOVE BEST? Barry and Alex. WHAT IS HIS/HER GREATEST FEAR? Becoming nothing. CHARACTER’S GREATEST STRENGTH: My confidence and ability to handle situations as they come. CHARACTER’S GREATEST FLAW/WEAKNESS: I’m so all-systems-go and charging forward that I don’t...consider consequences. My recklessness is my worst flaw. SEVEN VIRTUES: Diligence SEVEN SINS: Slut? BIGGEST VULNERABILITY (NONPHYSICAL): It’s very easy to get me to do things if you rile me up enough. BIGGEST REGRET: Ooh, maybe not going to college? BIGGEST ACCOMPLISHMENT: Getting accepted into NYU. WHAT IS/ARE THE CHARACTER’S BIGGEST, DARKEST SECRETS? (He sometimes has suicide ideation and it’s stronger than he’d like to admit) WHO ELSE KNOWS, IF ANYONE? No one. SHORT TERM GOALS: Pay rent. LONG TERM GOALS: Have the Mudhouse survive in the economy and become something to the neighborhood. WHAT EVENT OR OCCURRENCE DOES S/HE MOST DREAD OR FEAR? Losing everything on this stupid coffeehouse. WHAT DOES S/HE ACTIVELY WORK TO GAIN, KEEP, OR PROTECT? That stupid coffeehouse. WHAT IS THIS CHARACTER’S DREAM JOB? I always wanted to be like, a real artist. But this is a cool second. RELIGION: Agnostic DOES THE CHARACTER BELIEVE IN A GOD OR GODDESS? No IS RELIGION OR SPIRITUALITY AN IMPORTANT PART OF THIS CHARACTER’S LIFE? Nah SUPERSTITION: None CHINESE ZODIAC: Horse ASTROLOGICAL ZODIAC: Aries ELEMENT: Fire

LIKES AND DISLIKES

COLOR: Royal blue FOOD: Crab DRINK: Black-eye BOOK: Ha. I don’t read. THEME SONG: I will rock out to that Orange is the New Black song for my entire life. MUSIC GENRE: Alternative PLACE: Seattle PERSON: Barry MOVIE: Trainspotters TV SHOW: Parks and Rec SUBJECT IN SCHOOL: Art ANIMAL: Cat LEAST FAVORITE ANIMAL: Goose WHERE DOES THIS CHARACTER LIKE TO HANG OUT? A blues bar by where we live. WHERE IS THIS CHARACTER’S DREAM PLACE TO LIVE? Moving back to Seattle but only if Barry and Alex can come with. WHAT SORTS OF BOOKS ARE MOST LIKELY TO BE FOUND ON THEIR SHELVES? Ha. MODE OF TRANSPORTATION: Transit. SEASON: Fall. HOLIDAY: That month between Thanksgiving and Christmas is cool. FLOWER: Erm. Ones that smell nice? POSSESSION: I still have a baseball jersey that belonged to my mom and it’s literally the last thing I have of her.