#this should be intuitively obvious to the most casual observer

[lewstherintelescope]

death of the author says wheel of time is a good chaste christian fantasy 👍

[uuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh]

When banned from using "trivially" in a proof...

“Hello all. In a fellow mathposter's topology class they were not allowed to use the word "trivially" or any synonym thereof his proofs. The person presenting his work then crossed out "trivially" and wrote instead "indubitably." This inspired him to write a program that will insert condescending adverbial phrases before any statement in a math proof. Trivially, this is a repost. Below is the list--please come up with more if you can!

Obviously

Clearly

Anyone can see that

Trivially

Indubitably

It follows that

Evidently

By basic applications of previously proven lemmas,

The proof is left to the reader that

It goes without saying that

Consequently

By immediate consequence,

Of course

But then again

By symmetry

Without loss of generality,

Anyone with a fifth grade education can see that

I would wager 5 dollars that

By the contrapositive

We need not waste ink in proving that

By Euler

By Fermat

By a simple diagonalization argument,

We all agree that

It would be absurd to deny that

Unquestionably,

Indisputably,

It is plain to see that

It would be embarrassing to miss the fact that

It would be an insult to my time and yours to prove that

Any cretin with half a brain could see that

By Fermat’s Last Theorem,

By the Axiom of Choice,

It is equivalent to the Riemann Hypothesis that

By a simple counting argument,

Simply put,

One’s mind immediately leaps to the conclusion that

By contradiction,

I shudder to think of the poor soul who denies that

It is readily apparent to the casual observer that

With p < 5% we conclude that

It follows from the Zermelo-Fraenkel axioms that

Set theory tells us that

Divine inspiration reveals to us that

Patently,

Needless to say,

By logic

By the Laws of Mathematics

By all means,

With probability 1,

Who could deny that

Assuming the Continuum Hypothesis,

Galois died in order to show us that

There is a marvellous proof (which is too long to write here) that

We proved in class that

Our friends over at Harvard recently discovered that

It is straightforward to show that

By definition,

By a simple assumption,

It is easy to see that

Even you would be able to see that

Everybody knows that

I don’t know why anybody would ask, but

Between you and me,

Unless you accept Gödel’s Incompleteness Theorem,

A reliable source has told me

It is a matter of simple arithmetic to show that

Beyond a shadow of a doubt,

When we view this problem as an undecidable residue class whose elements are universal DAGs, we see that

You and I both know that

And there you have it,

And as easy as ABC,

And then as quick as a wink,

If you’ve been paying attention you’d realize that

By the Pigeonhole Principle

By circular reasoning we see that

When we make the necessary and sufficient assumptions,

It is beyond the scope of this course to prove that

Only idealogues and sycophants would debate whether

It is an unfortunately common misconception to doubt that

By petitio principii, we assert that

We may take for granted that

For legal reasons I am required to disclose that

It is elementary to show that

I don’t remember why, but you’ll have to trust me that

Following the logical steps, we might conclude

We are all but forced to see that

By the same logic,

I’m not even going to bother to prove that

By Kant’s Categorical imperative,

Everyone and their mother can see that

A child could tell you that

It baffles me that you haven’t already realized that

Notice then that

Just this once I will admit to you that

Using the proper mindset one sees that

Remember the basic laws of common sense:

There is a lovely little argument that shows that

Figure 2 (not shown here) makes it clear that

Alas, would that it were not true that

If I’m being honest with you,

According to the pointy-headed theorists sitting in their Ivory Towers in academia,

We will take as an axiom that

Accept for the moment that

These are your words, not mine, but

A little birdie told me that

I heard through the grapevine that

In the realm of constructive mathematics,

It is a theorem from classical analysis that

Life is too short to prove that

A consequence of IUT is that

As practitioners are generally aware,

It is commonly understood that

As the reader is no doubt cognizant,

As an exercise for the reader, show that

All the cool kids know that

It is not difficult to see that

Terry Tao told me in a personal email that

Behold,

Verify that

In particular,

Moreover,

Yea verily

By inspection,

A trivial but tedious calculation shows that

Suppose by way of contradiction that

By a known theorem,

Henceforth

Recall that

Wherefore said He unto them,

It is the will of the Gods that

It transpires that

We find

As must be obvious to the meanest intellect,

It pleases the symmetry of the world that

Accordingly,

If there be any justice in the world,

It is a matter of fact that

It can be shown that

Implicitly, then

Ipso facto

Which leads us to the conclusion that

Which is to say

That is,

The force of deductive logic then drives one to the conclusion that

Whereafter we find

Assuming the reader’s intellect approaches that of the writer, it should be obvious that

Ergo

With God as my witness,

As a great man once told me,

One would be hard-pressed to disprove that

Even an applied mathematician would concede that

One sees in a trice that

You can convince yourself that

Mama always told me

I know it, you know it, everybody knows that

Even the most incompetent T.A. could see,

This won't be on the test, but

Take it from me,

Axiomatically,

Naturally,

A cursory glance reveals that

As luck would have it,

Through the careful use of common sense,

By the standard argument,

I hope I don’t need to explain that

According to prophecy,

Only a fool would deny that

It is almost obvious that

By method of thinking,

Through sheer force of will,

Intuitively,

I’m sure I don’t need to tell you that

You of all people should realize that

The Math Gods demand that

The clever student will notice

An astute reader will have noticed that

It was once revealed to me in a dream that

Even my grandma knows that

Unless something is horribly wrong,

And now we have all we need to show that

If you use math, you can see that

It holds vacuously that

Now check this out:

Barring causality breakdown, clearly

We don't want to deprive the reader of the joy of discovering for themselves why

One of the Bernoullis probably showed that

Somebody once told me

By extrapolation,

Categorically,

If the reader is sufficiently alert, they will notice that

It’s hard not to prove that

The sophisticated reader will realize that

In this context,

It was Lebesque who first asked whether

As is tradition,

According to local folklore,

We hold these truths to be self-evident that

By simple induction,

In case you weren’t paying attention,

A poor student or a particularly clever dog will realize immediately that

Every student brought up in the American education system is told that

Most experts agree that

Sober readers see that

And would you look at that:

And lo!

By abstract nonsense,

I leave the proof to the suspicious reader that

When one stares at the equations they immediately rearrange themselves to show that

This behooves you to state that

Therefore

The heralds shall sing for generations hence that

If I’ve said it once I’ve said it a thousand times,

Our forefathers built this country on the proposition that

My father told me, and his father before that, and his before that, that

As sure as the sun will rise again tomorrow morning,

The burden of proof is on my opponents to disprove that

If you ask me,

I didn’t think I would have to spell this out, but

For all we know,

Promise me you won’t tell mom, but

It would be a disservice to human intelligence to deny that

Proof of the following has been intentially omitted:

here isn’t enough space in the footnote section to prove that

Someone of your status would understand that

It would stand to reason that

Ostensibly,

The hatred of 10,000 years ensures that

There isn’t enough space in the footnote section to prove that

Simple deduction from peano’s axioms shows

By a careful change of basis we see that

Using Conway’s notation we see that

The TL;DR is that

Certainly,

Surely

An early theorem of Gauss shows that

An English major could deduce that

And Jesus said to his Apostles,

This fact may follow obviously from a theorem, but it's not obvious which theorem you're using:

Word on the streets is that

Assuming an arbitrary alignment of planets, astrology tells us

The voices insist that

Someone whispered to me on the subway yesterday that

For surely all cases,

Indeed,

(To be continued)

[shoichee]

hi ! <3 I Absolutely luv your scenarios!:) Can I request for the pregnant s/o scenario with Midorima & Murasakibara ? :o Thank you :D

HELLO <333 wahhh tysm for reading, and i hope you’re still around lurking here to see this, my anon <33 also, i did write these in headcanon formats but please PLEASE let me know if you wanted scenarios and i’ll whip up scenarios :>

Pregnant S/O with Midorima, Murasakibara

Note: I am also writing this hc under the premise that the S/O has been dating with them for quite some time and is practically settled with them

Part 1 here

Midorima Shintarou

How He Found Out

i would believe for him to always, always use protection whenever he ends up having sex with you, and make sure you’re on birth control to prevent such an occurence

for a pregnancy to even happen, these conditions need to happen: 1.) he needs to be 100% sure that the two of you will be together for a very, VERY long time enough to not freak out about contraceptives or at least toy with the idea of not use any in the back of his mind and 2.) you somehow riled him up so much that he let it slide once/twice and go condom-free (whether you were on birth control or not that’s up to you, but he’d assume you were)

well, it turns out that during one of those rare moments of unprotected sex, you got pregnant, and now here you are with a positive stick in your hand squinting at it and scratching your head that you were either incredibly lucky or unlucky to get pregnant out of those few times you two went raw

how were you gonna tell him? well, he was a traditional man, so you simply set up a small, cute surprise for him when he gets back home

y’know, balloons in the living room and a little wrapped gift on the cleared table… it would send the message across… you think

hours passed and you were on the sofa twiddling your thumbs like a preschooler on timeout LOL and you didn’t want to go anywhere in case Midorima comes home early

your instincts were right because an hour later, he comes home utterly exhausted, immediately thinking about being roundabout in asking to snuggle with you

but then he freezes when his shoe stepped and POPPED one of the balloons you scattered around prior, and it scared him SHITLESS

he almost dropped his lucky claypot. almost.

“(y/n), what is going on?!”

he thinks it’s one of your antics and pranks as usual, and he immediately sighs exasperatedly at the thought of cleaning the mess up

“Seriously, I can never leave you alone in this house, nanodayo…” and as he shuffles through the floor, trying to avoid the rest of the clutter you caused, he notices you sitting primly on the couch (and giving him a poorly-concealed smile)

“Shintaro! I didn’t know you’d come home so soon~”

“Well, everyone was being annoying as usual, and most of the work has been done for today. I might as well come home to spend the rest of the day with you… obviously.”

you were so obvious, your eyes flitting back to the gift on the table and back to him, and Midorima doesn’t know whether to roll his eyes or laugh

“I’m assuming this is all for me,” he sighed, trying to hide his smile. “I don’t recall any special occasion for today, though.”

oh, your face just grew the biggest shit-eating grin at his words

“Is that so?~” you feigned with a sing-song voice

at your insistence on him opening the present right now, he swiftly pulls the ribbon apart and opens the box to see your positive test

MIDORIMA.EXE has stopped working

“W-W-W-What is that?!”

“A pregnancy test.”

“Whose?!”

“... Mine?”

“Wait, how?! With who??”

“Uh…” You stared at him incredulously. “You?”

MIDORIMA.EXE is failing to reboot

you were pointing at yourself and Midorima to further try to get the POINT ACROSS to this poor man who’s trying to process this OFBEJDIWHRIE

but you stopped your hand motions when you see the purest smile slowly growing on Midorima’s normally stoic face

YOU.EXE has stopped working

he brings you into a tight embrace and for a while you two hug in silence, enjoying each other’s company

“So uh, I’m pregnant,” you said, your words slightly muffled by his shirt

“Yes, I am quite well aware now,” he replied dryly, but his eyes are quite affectionate

“I hope you realize that this is a huge responsibility, (y/n).”

“Hey! I know that it’s a big deal! Come on, who do you take me for?”

“... Right.”

During Pregnancy

the first thing he does was take you to the doctor’s just to find out when you were going to deliver

“What? Why?” you asked him

“I must know our child’s horoscope sign as soon as possible,” he said seriously. “We have to make sure they’re born with no misfortunes attached to them.”

“Are you fucking serious?”

“Why wouldn’t I be?”

MIDORIMA PLEASE-

okay, but he’d also ask the doctor diligently on what you should be doing and what he should be doing to ensure a successful delivery

Midorima is deadass budget-version doctor at home

it’s that one meme where you go:

“Hey mom can we have a doctor?”

Mom: “We already have a doctor at home.”

Doctor at home: Midorima Shintarou

JOKES aside, he really is knowledgeable on this entire ordeal, which is a blessing and a curse

you could always come to him to rely on him when you’re unsure of something or for him to deal with your moodiness

but at the same time, you can’t get away with snacking on abhorrent things because he’d SNATCH them off your hands and scold you for being irresponsible LOLOL

you could NEVER sneak off unhealthy food because he’s ALWAYS somehow there to catch you or he eventually finds out later and still give you an earful

you still try to do it again anyways

then there’s that side of Midorima where he’d stuff the entire house with bundles of lucky items because he insists on buying two lucky items for you and the kid every day during your pregnancy… all so you can “maximize” your chances of having a successful delivery

you’re sobBING, it’s so CUTE BUT SO DUMB

did I mention that he’s already started on building the nursery and decorating it in ALL sorts of lucky charms and adorable plushies under the guise of “being safe and making the room lucky”

he rarely lets you step out of the house, but if you have to, he’ll always make the time for you so he can accompany you and just glower at anyone who looks at you the wrong way

surprisingly, he’s a lot more lenient on the PDA during your pregnancy: LOTS of hand-holding, chaste kisses on your head/forehead and maybe cheeks, and he does often hug you from the side to protect you

if you bring it up to him though, he’ll deny it to the VERY end and insists that he only does it so you don’t get moody and snap at random strangers passing by, and then it’ll be a hassle to deal with them

yeah right, Midorima

Murasakibara Atsushi

How He Found Out

when you first found out, you decided to hide it from him until you can figure out how to go about your pregnancy

1.) he didn’t seem like the type who can handle kids, let alone even like them

2.) you’re worried about how he’d react considering that he has a “devil-may-care” attitude and has quite a languid view on most things, even to this day

you underestimated Murasakibara though because when you first initially excused yourself to the restroom the first few times, he assumed that you were having too many sweets and barred you from consuming them until you got better

but you didn’t… in fact, you looked even sicker as the days progressed

that was when Murasakibara got suspicious and started paying attention to you and your behavior

when he gets serious, he’s incredibly sharp and intuitive

even still, he doesn’t know if he should confront you or wait until you tell him, because you’ve always been the “big pants” in the relationship, for lack of better terms

so he waits and observes, but he still acts just as normally as any other day, and you, on the other hand, thought you were able to successfully hide this from him

still, when you keep up this sneaky behavior around him, he slowly doubts himself about if he did anything wrong, if he forgot anything important, or if you’re doubting this relationship ???

but he’s not going to admit it to you, so he’s going to casually call Himuro and voice his concerns in such a roundabout way

Himuro immediately understands what he’s trying to ask and simply tells him to talk it out with you

ofc, Murasakibara just huffs and complains about it being so troublesome, but Himuro, smiles, knowing him better that he was going to do it despite his verbal complaints

when asking you if he did anything “wrong” and such, you immediately shake your head and deny it all to ease his worries, and you tell him that it wasn’t anything like what he imagined

at your words, Murasakibara was relieved but at the same time, if these weren’t the problems, why were you acting so strange?

like when you kept oversleeping, kept rushing to the bathroom early mornings, or when you even turned down his offer of going to the grocery store, bakery, and the confectionery store together multiple times simply because you said that you didn’t have the energy

he finally confronted after a few weeks of dodging on your end, draping his entire body over you from behind and placing his chin on top of your head

“Chibi-chin…” he mumbled. “You’ve been acting really weird for the past few weeks. Talk to me.”

you only sighed as you turn around and embrace Murasakibara, and then separated from him to put distance between the two of you as you make eye contact with him

you resigned yourself to tell him the truth because he was going to find it sooner or later, considering that you’ve developed a small bump… so far, you’ve passed off your stomach size as a “food baby” and “gaining weight, I guess,” but you knew you couldn’t use that excuse forever

but before you can utter out a single word, dizziness hits you like a truck, making you completely lose balance before you legit fainted on the spot

poor Murasakibara expresses one of his rare moments of absolute distress as he lunged forward to catch you before you fell to the floor

he’s dialing Himuro because he has no idea what to do and he’s absolutely PANICKING and thinking of the worst-case scenarios of what happened to you

Murasakibara was READY TO CALL THE AMBULANCE AND EVERYTHING but Himuro managed to calm him down enough to reason that it’s better to bring you by car

after all, Himuro had an inkling of an idea of what happened to you, but like a little shit, he’s not gonna tell Murasakibara because seeing him so openly expressive like that was a guilty pleasure for him

POOR MURASAKIBARA

he’s constantly holding you in the car like his life is on the line, and Himuro is just driving and looking straight ahead mentally cackling and wondering how he’s gonna escape his wrath if Murasakibara ever finds out that he knew but didn’t tell him

imagine a distraught giant busting through the doors carrying an unconscious you with a model-like guy trailing behind and pushing the giant to the side to try to coherently talk to the disoriented receptionists

what a life

the doctor merely just says that you fainted and it wasn’t serious, and Murasakibara doesn’t believe them ONE BIT

but he notices Himuro walking over to the doctor’s ear and whispering something, before they had an “ah-ha!” moment, and then right on cue, they had you moved to a different room for testing

poor giant is so agitated, constantly shaking his leg on the floor while he’s sitting in the waiting room, jeez HIMURO PLEASE GIVE HIM A BREAK

“Congratulations! She’s pregnant!”

“Huh.”

“Aren’t you her special someone?”

“Indeed, Atsushi is!” Himuro answers for him with a wink

Murasakibara needs to p r o c e s s this

after a while, you groggily stroll out the room like nothing happened, but still you had a frown on your face because you didn’t want Murasakibara to find out about your pregnancy this way

the car ride home was so AWKWARDLY SILENT

when you both get home, he gets SO PETTY AND CHILDISH AND HUFFS AWAY AND REFUSES TO TALK TO YOU

you try to coax him with kisses, hugs, and tickles, but he’s not budging one bit

even snacks didn’t move him… even though he did eye them for a bit before he turned away

“Atsushiiii,” you whined. “Talk to meeee, I’m sorry.” and there you go pouting and trying to squish his cheeks to get him to give up

he looks at you with an uncharacteristically serious look when he asks, “Why didn’t you tell me, Chibi-chin?”

and here you are, reluctantly explaining your reasons, and Murasakibara is just frowning because he’s thinking about how he needs to get his shit together so you don’t ever think that you can’t rely on him again

lots of wholesome cuddling to make it all up to him

“So… Chibi-chin.”

“Yeah?”

“I’m… gonna be a dad?”

“Yeah.”

and he gives you the brightest smile he’s had since the game against the Jabberwocks, except it was much more intimate and sweeter

During Pregnancy

does Murasakibara have any idea on how to deal with pregnancy? no, but to be fair, most people aren’t prepared anyways

he keeps forgetting that he can’t just give you sweets and snacks willy-nilly anymore because that’d be horrible for the you and the child

but he’s always giving them to you out of habit LOL, but of course, usually you turn his snacks down and remind him that you can’t eat them anymore

except when you have ungodly cravings and just accept his offerings without a complaint

and then Murasakibara feels like something feels off before he realizes you’re tearing off the packaging and ready to shove the entire biscuit into your mouth—

from that point on, he’s a lot more diligent in keeping the processed foods away from you

whenever Himuro stops by to help you out, Murasakibara REFUSES to forget what he did before and he glares daggers at him with every chance he gets, and both you and Himuro ignore him and are having your own conversations about the child AND MURASAKIBARA JUST SULKS IN THE CORNER ALL ANGRY—

he’s so petty and he’s so pouty, and honestly he is the one that becomes clingy during your pregnancy

whenever you shop for baby essentials to prepare, he’s always tailing after you like a lost puppy and trying to learn and understand the baby basics(????), while also doubling as your bodyguard

I mean, who would want to mess with you while there’s a purple titan RIGHT there?

still, you get a huge kick when you see people’s shocked expressions at seeing this gigantic man in the baby sections/aisles following around

you noticed, especially during your later trimesters, that he’s even gentler in how he handles and touches you, and it’s super cute that he’s so conscious about his size and strength around you

your heart is LITERALLY melting

you don’t think he even realizes that himself

but still, Murasakibara has to literally grit his teeth to stop himself from glaring/snapping back at you when your mood swings get really bad

how much do you want to bet that Murasakibara makes you buy extra baby food just to try it?

he’d probably even make you taste test it with him

he says it’s so the baby can eat the best brands out there and doesn’t have to eat the shitty food, but you think that he’s just eating it for fun and you tell him not to spoil the baby so early like that

he leaves the decorations and actual planning up to you though, even though he’ll be right behind you as you do it… he just finds it tiring and too complex sometimes

if you send him on grocery errands and things like that, he’d actually get up and do it without a complaint

if it was all for you and his child’s sake, he’ll do anything… after all, it’s the least he can do to be a dependable father

[whatifyoulivelikethat]

You mentioned that you find it difficult to get into Hoseok’s head about how he thinks in an intimate situation, and that made me curious; how do you think the other boys think in an intimate situation? Like what’s what do you think their thought processes are when you’re writing scenes with each boy? (I feel like I’m just repeating the same thing but idk how else to explain it! Also I apologise if you’ve answered something like this before and I just missed it! :])

I don’t think anyone is prepared for my response to this LOL (you asked for it...). I’m about to get kind of philosophical / psychological / theoretical so uh... if you want to read more, then click. XD

I am the kind of person who thinks multiple trains of thought at once, and I do so when writing intimacy - from the situation the member is in (and the background leading up to it) to the person they’re with (the reader) to the relationships mentioned in the story, because all these things shape reactions and thoughts. Believable intimacy with people the reader is already familiar with (aka BTS) is a hard thing to write (I don’t know these guys, duh). I struggle with it. Sometimes I feel I miss the mark, but again, I don’t know for sure.

Core Concept: I believe everyone has a base personality (the predetermined self you are born with) and that base personality is shaped by the environment, or a learned personality (the self that develops from constant interaction with others). Some people are more influenced than others and the same experience can impact two different people in different ways with differing levels of severity. Not going to get too into it; you get the idea. Also, this theory probably already exists but I am too lazy to look it up. XD

So, this is me detailing base personality, but it will be different in every story, because every situation I write is different (even my PWP - everything I write has underlying emotions, even if it’s only the most carnal, primal need being satisfied; I think it’s boring / not fun to read otherwise). I’m not gonna say “I think” anymore; you’re reading this because you’re asking me what I think. These are not facts. I don’t know BTS on the personal level. This is also why I tend to write AUs over idol!BTS. 

This is just my brain when writing. Okay? Okay.

Kim Namjoon: Would constantly communicate, thus doesn’t get jealous easily. Acknowledges and questions his own judgements. Not afraid to say what he likes / wants, which probably leads to a more dom personality. He does have a ‘leader’ quality to him after all. Able to move in and out of that headspace easily because he is self-aware and attuned to himself due to his introspectiveness. Willing to have prolonged discussions / researching before doing something he hasn’t done before and confident in guiding another once he’s done so. Could have sex with no strings attached (for research, to comfort another, or just to blow some steam)

Kim Seokjin: Takes a while to become intimate. Can be childish at times when communicating and will say things without fully completing the thought (leading to immaturity / jealousy / etc). More likely to want to be led at first so he can feel more comfortable with the other person, but is willing to lead after some experience. Feels that he needs to show his affections with action rather than talk about them and would do so quietly, such as preparing meals (and will remember your preferences and favorite things). Maintains a positive front to avoid causing discomfort which could lead to miscommunication. Playful during nonsexual interactions and becomes more serious during the act.

Min Yoongi: Intuitive. Good at reading people. Doesn’t get involved unless intrigued and feels that the other person is worth knowing (not maliciously, in a curious sense). Like water, adapts to his partner while also still being himself. Doesn’t talk much during sex but is able to read the situation well and communicates nonverbally. Leans more towards dom (the feeling of being in control is important to him), but can sub if his partner is aware that he is the one dictating what happens. Doesn’t easily say “I love you” but it’s obvious by his actions. Pays attention to his partner and is very observant.

Jung Hoseok: Sex is not that important, but rather the other things - matching outfits, cuddling, kissing. A lot of foreplay. Doesn’t like to inconvenience others. Naturally more dom than sub because he doesn’t know how to subdue his desires (but not domineering, if you get what I mean). Needs to be told twice sometimes, gets carried away, can be pushy, but genuinely cheerful most of the time. A long talk can go a long way and is willing to have them if partner initiates. Wise once he becomes serious.

Park Jimin: Fun, playful, kind of a little shit (XD), but can also be shy and unsure if the other person is older / more experienced. Switch, really depends on who he’s with (I’m just more of a dom, so he’s usually written as sub in my stuff). Very much appreciates things being done for him and reciprocates tenfold. Sensitive to wards when serious. Very sexy when asked to be but defaults to cute on a regular basis. Enjoys pushing the limits when he can.

Kim Taehyung: Introspective and careful, although it might not seem that way because he can seem calm / chill. Could have casual sex because he decides how much he wants to care about things. Wants praise from people. Wants to do the things he likes more than trying new things, leading to dom tendencies (but will become interested in stuff on his own). Territorial in the sense that he thinks things should be a certain way but can be talked to change his mind. Pursues what he wants (within reason) and doesn’t ask anyone. His sexiness comes from his confidence in himself.

Jeon Jungkook: Becomes what he thinks his partner wants (and can be wrong). Shows affection by focusing on the other person. Wants to be told he’s wanted which leads to sub tendencies. Dom tendencies when he wants things and can be immature about it (he usually gets what he wants, he’s the youngest after all). The desire of the other person has to be obvious otherwise he gets discouraged. Actions > words, thus can be bad with words. Likes learning from those more experienced. When he loves something, he really loves it (a little obsessive but not malicious). Doesn’t want to reveal everything at once but can be figured out through his actions and body language.

[margarethelstone]

Our Sleeves Were Wet With Tears | Chapter 9

Chapter 9 / Read on AO3!

So it was true.

He hadn't misheard her.

Just...

"What on earth?" he asked no one in particular, his eyes raised to the sky and his hand pressed against his forehead. "How could she do that? Why would she? And now, when it's her last chance to participate in the school tournaments, when she was so determined to compete with the Queen for the title... Just what is that idiot thinking?"

He inhaled deeply, trying to think of anything that might have been the cause of Chihaya's decision. Again, if he'd been his normal self, he would have solved that riddle in an instant – now, however, his mind was blank, all rational thought shoved away by the astonishment that had fallen upon him just now.

Life was just becoming too easy, wasn't it?

"Are you sure she meant it?" he turned back to Kana again after a short while. "You said it was because of her studying, but I really can't imagine Chihaya changing her priorities like that. Not for good, anyway."

"I know it seems absurd but she was serious about it. In fact, I don't think I have ever seen her so determined in my life, as difficult as it is to imagine," the girl in front of him answered dejectedly. "She kept reassuring us that she still loved karuta and that she would always come back to playing it. She made us promise that we would still work hard during her absence and then in turn she swore that she would always be there for us, whenever we might need help or advice, or even just someone to encourage us when things will seem too hard. But even with all that, she wouldn't let us convince her that her being our Captain – or even just a regular member of the club – had always been of more meaning than any advice she might give us. She just wouldn't budge.

"And we all knew that she had every right to do so. We know what her academic skills are and that she needs to put more effort than some to just score decently. It's only natural that she might want to shift her focus a little so close to the exams, even if it's not something you would normally expect of her. Only..."

"Only what?" Taichi asked eagerly, even though he felt like he already knew what Kanade was going to say.

"Only that no matter how much she talked about it and how good her arguments were, it still seemed like all of this was an excuse rather than a reason for her to leave."

For once, his intuition was on point.

Because of course it was nothing but an excuse. Even if he still wasn't ready to guess – to admit that he had guessed from the start – the real reason for Chihaya's decision, it was obvious that the justification she had used to explain it was a fake one. Even if he hadn't known all that he did, even if he hadn't known her for as long and as well as he had, there was one thing that he was he was utterly, absolutely sure of:

Ayase Chihaya would never have left the karuta club if her bad grades had been the sole reason for it.

No way in hell that she would.

And now, he actually did know quite a lot.

On one hand, he felt arrogant believing that it really might have been because of him that she had made up her mind to leave. For so long he'd lived his life convinced that karuta was the one thing Chihaya cherished the most, to the degree where she had prioritised it not only over her duties, but her social life and even relationships, as well. The talk they'd had a little more than a week ago had surely corrected some of his views, however, it still was a week of enlightenment against a lifetime of belief... A lifetime of thinking that she simply couldn't care about him enough to make a sacrifice this grand, especially when it was of no use anyway.

On the other, all the clues he'd got were just too unambiguous to think of it as just a mere coincidence.

Besides, the useless part of it was exactly what made it probable in Chihaya's case.

"Did she say anything else?" he asked wearily at last, channelling all of his determination into this one simple question, much in the same way Kana had while answering his previous one. "When you tried to persuade her to stay, did she respond with anything other than what you just told me about?"

Again, Kanade denied with a firm shake of her head. "No. She just continued to assure us that this was a decision she'd made and that it wasn't a hasty one. She said she knew it was sudden and that for that it might seem rash, but that she really had thought it through... Though when exactly she might have found the time to do that was a mystery. Still, she repeated that, over and over again, until we had no choice but to accept it. She kept apologising, too, for not letting us know in advance."

"Didn't she though?" Taichi wondered out loud. "Were there really no signs that she might be thinking about leaving?" he added somewhat desperately.

"Nothing she would say. She came to the meetings as always until one day, she didn't. Or rather, she did come, only to say that she was resigning."

It was the first time during this conversation when Taichi heard a hint of irritation ringing in Kana's voice in addition to the sadness present in it almost from the start. Or perhaps it wasn't irritation but disappointment that he discerned now? A quiet reproach Chihaya had earned not by handling things poorly, but by refusing to share her troubles with those meant to be her friends?

An edginess that could only have grown so strong because of the care and devotion behind it.

Was this how his former club members felt about him, too, and only chose to hold back so that they wouldn't hurt him further?

Well, even if, it wasn't the time to be worrying about it.

Right now, he needed answers.

As many as he could get.

"This isn't right," he said, his words muffled by his hand that was once again pressed against his face. "And it doesn't make sense. There must have been something... Something that would suggest she was preparing to leave. Something in her behaviour or her tone, or... I don't know. But if she really had been thinking about it earlier, like she said she had, then surely, it must've affected her somehow."

His brow furrowed under his fingers, the tips of which he now dug into his skin unwittingly. The cogs in his brain were turning, too, as he tried to imagine Chihaya's conduct during those few meetings that she had attended. There couldn't have been many; there simply hadn't been enough time for it between his own resignation and hers.

And he simply couldn't create a vision in which Chihaya would not act suspiciously.

She had always worn her heart on her sleeve, whether it was excitement or worry or fear that she felt. To think that she would come to practice while considering her retirement and behave casually...

That just didn't match her character at all.

"You're an observant person, Oe-san," he muttered after another moment. He knew she was still watching him and he also supposed that she could easily guess what exactly was going through his mind right now, and therefore, he didn't even try to hide his confusion this time. "If Chihaya behaved any differently than before, as I'm sure she did, you certainly didn't miss it. You've picked up on lesser hints," he added, a weary smiled curling his lips again. "So please, don't hide it from me. Unless it's something she asked you not to tell directly-"

"She didn't say anything like that," Kana interrupted him. "But as I said, she didn't really say anything more than what we've already talked about. She wouldn't talk about it."

"Then please tell me what you saw."

Kanade didn't answer him immediately. She looked down again, instead, although this time Taichi noticed that it was neither abashment nor cautiousness that had prompted this little action of hers.

Rather, she appeared thoughtful, as if she'd been trying to recall her own memories from a little less than a month ago, and perhaps to decide which of her observations were actually worth speaking of. He didn't rush her. He didn't tell her to just share everything with him, either, allowing her to pick the parts she deemed valuable and dispose of those she found harmful or futile.

As much as he yearned for all the information he could get, he still had enough reason left in him to understand that he didn't need all of it.

If there was one person that knew what he should hear, it was Kanade.

"I saw her lose her drive," she uttered at last, her eyes still firmly at the ground under her feet. "I saw her come to practice and follow the usual routine with none of the enthusiasm she normally would have shown. I saw her play matches against the first years and nearly lose, because her mind was clearly on other things. They thought she was going easy on them and we let them believe that, but all of the older members knew that she would never do that purposely. And then I heard-"

She stopped short in the middle of the sentence. At this point, Taichi thought his heart would jump out of his chest from the suspense, now only made worse by the barely commenced phrase; but again, he managed to hold himself back, only silently praying that his companion would finish her thought eventually.

After all, she wouldn't have cut herself off like this for some meaningless news.

"I actually heard her say something, too," she chose to finish in the end, a decision for which Taichi was exceedingly grateful. "It wasn't anything she said to me – or to anyone else really – so I probably wasn't supposed to hear it in the first place. In fact, I don't think she even realised that she was saying it out loud, so it feels sort of unfair to focus on it, much less to relay it to you now... But I think you should know!" she exclaimed unexpectedly, raising her gaze to meet Taichi's, her eyes sparkling with resolve. "Maybe I'm wrong and shouldn't tell you after all. Or maybe it doesn't even mean anything and I'm just making a big deal of it unnecessarily. I certainly don't know what Chihaya-chan might have meant, but... but..."

"But maybe I will," Taichi concluded the statement for her. "Is that what you're trying to say?"

Kana nodded firmly.

"Alright. Let's hear it then."

And so she told him. No longer sparing the details, she recalled the one time in the clubroom after the practice was done and the team was getting ready to leave. When they all cleaned and put away the cards and when the first-years showered them with questions, the excitement shining in their eyes as they jumped from one to another, unable to decide whom of their seniors they should ask first and what their inquiry should be about.

She told him how Chihaya had been the only member that had been asked none, simply because she was still kneeling on the mat.

How she had stayed that way for a long while after her match had come to an end, leaning over her cards as if she'd been revising her game, motionless and focused and successfully fooling everyone that this was exactly what she'd been doing. How they let her be, waving a hand at her dismissively at first, deciding to shift their attention to the inquisitive youngsters instead.

And then she told him about the one thing that interested him most. One to which Kana evidently was the only one privy.

"She said that all the cards were black to her," she said straightforwardly. "No, not said. More like, she mumbled it under her breath, so quietly that I wasn't even sure at first that I'd heard her correctly. But she repeated it once, and then once more. They are black to me too, now. And then I knew I hadn't misheard."

It was Taichi who kept silent now, although unlike Kana, he did not look away while doing so. Quite the opposite: his eyes had not left his friend's face since the moment she'd started her tale, and he surely wasn't going to shift his gaze now. Although she didn't know it, she was an anchor to him now. With her kind, supportive expression, with all the care he knew she had for him, he used her as a pillar now, too, while his mind reeled with images of what Kanade had just described. The implications her story had brought.

The hard truth he didn't think possible and yet one that he had no choice but to accept.

It was all so ridiculous.

Really. It was absurd and wrong, and surreal. It fit perfectly with the rest of the puzzle, the one missing piece that confirmed and added meaning to all the rest, while at the same time it screamed crazy and unbelievable and nuts. It was the knowledge she'd shared with him that appeared absolutely ludicrous, and yet he still couldn't think of it as anything but natural. It was insane.

And he didn't feel particularly lucid, either.

He felt like squatting on the ground, or maybe downright falling onto his knees, with his hands buried in his hair as he pondered over the foolishness of it. He didn't know whether he wanted to groan or sigh, or maybe rock with laughter, that due to its obvious mirthlessness would only have been seen as hysterical.

Perhaps Kana had been wrong after all, and had made a mistake by telling him that last part, for as of now, he surely wasn't ready to deal with it.

"Damn it, Chihaya," he grumbled eventually, as he closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose with his fingers. "All of these years of playing with poems and you still can't come up with your own metaphors. And you want to be a teacher?"

He took a deep breath before lowering his hand and turning sideways, his eyes fixing on the horizon beyond the glass door next to him. He could sense Kana's stare on his countenance, but didn't respond in kind.

"Of all the girls that walk this earth, all the airheads and maniacs and pretty-faces I had to fall for the one who's all three at once," he mused quietly instead. "Of all people I care about, I need to let go of the one that's most difficult to release. The one girl I couldn't forget if I tried."

"Mashima-san," Kanade countered. "I don't think the qualities you've just mentioned have anything to do with it. You don't love Chihaya-chan for her looks, do you? And it's that love that makes it difficult."

"No, you're right, I don't. But all they are a part of who she is," Taichi replied without missing a beat. "All of the qualities I mentioned are. And of course, there are a lot more, too. Still... I feel like it might have been easier if her personality was a little different in those particular aspects, you know?"

"How so?"

"Because then I wouldn't feel like I need to look after her," he said, his eyes shifting to her. "Look, I know she's strong. I know she can take care of herself and doesn't really need me in the way I wished she did. Even with all that, however, I can't help but worry about the times when she does need someone. Even just in high school, there were so many situations when her attitude could have been disastrous, because she couldn't be bothered to consider it from more than one angle, or because she didn't even know that she should.

"It's just... you don't know how difficult it is to stay away from her now," he added in a voice that cracked just a little. "To keep my distance when I see her struggle with something. Only today I had to restrain myself from walking over to her during the lunch break, because she seemed to be terribly under the weather, and I really might have done it if Nishida hadn't got to her first. Even though I know it's not what I should do or what she wants... It's just hard."

The gulp that he took was painful against his tightening throat, but Taichi paid it no mind.

"And it's only going to be worse now that I know about her leaving the club," he continued stubbornly. "Even right now, all I can think of is how I want to run to the library and see her, if only to tell her what I think of that decision of hers. It's stupid, so I won't do it. Still, it won't change the fact that I will want to, and that it won't fade away with time."

"But what does it have to do with Chihaya-chan's character?"

"Only that if I were used to thinking of her as a rational, responsible human being, then maybe stepping aside and letting her live her life wouldn't be this difficult. I wouldn't feel the need to interfere, because I wouldn't be used to doing it. And then it would be easier to reconcile with the fact that I'm not as indispensable as I once thought."

He chanced a glance at her then, a small, sad smile tugging on his lips. He knew what Kanade was going to say next, how she was going to contradict his words; and he didn't mind. After all, the few times when he had actually allowed himself to be vulnerable had always been shared with his (now former) co-members, and it was thanks to them being as helpful and trustworthy as they were.

Yes, that was exactly the word he would use to describe them.

Even with all his fears and all his barriers that he had raised along the years, he still had faith that they would not let him down or reject him, no matter what mistakes he might make.

The only people in the world that made him feel safe.

"Chihaya-chan surely wouldn't say that about you," he heard Kanade answer, much as he'd expected of her. "You are important to her. Even if not in every field, she does need you. And I think you understand that, too. You’d better."

Taichi's smile turned a little warmer.

"I do now," he replied, mindful to emphasise the last word properly. "It wasn't always obvious, but I suppose I'm wiser now, so that's something to be glad about. Even if it still doesn't seem like enough. Maybe it never will."

"But?" Kanade asked. "There's a but coming, isn't there?"

"But it's nothing to be worrying about now," he said, straightening up. "It won't change anything. I know what I must do now, even if it seems nearly impossible at times. Even though it never seems appealing. It's the right thing to do, however, and the only one I am actually certain of at the moment."

The look Kana gave him was sceptical, to say the least. "And by the right thing, do you mean staying away from her?" she asked. "Do you really believe that's the path you should choose?"

"It's the best I could think of and trust me, I've thought about it a lot. I need time. We both do, I think. And... since Chihaya is actually staying aloof... it seems best to use that opportunity and test out my hypothesis. Heaven knows it would be even harder if she did look for my company."

Kanade's gaze only turned more disbelieving, but she said nothing. And Taichi was glad, for he knew that whatever she might say to him now, no matter how wise or logical, would be disregarded by him in an instant. Not because he was free of doubt, like his words might suggest, but because the uncertainty was still there, and he couldn't let it take over him.

Although, there was also one thing he had no doubts about.

Whatever it might have looked like, however much he might have appeared to crave Chihaya's interest, he really didn't want her to come after him again, much less if it were to ask him to come back.

After all, the only reason why their talk last week hadn't gone south immediately was because she wasn't trying to do that.

Not like when...

"Anyway, as I said, there's no point in thinking about it now," he added resolutely, stubbornly refusing to accept this new direction his mind had shown. "Whether I'm right or wrong, only time can tell now. What I do know for sure, though, is that I've kept you long enough, so I won't anymore. Go to Chihaya, and then go to the practice. Tell everyone I say hi," he threw in as casually as he could, too. "And that I, too, am expecting them to work hard. Who knows, maybe if everything goes right, I'll come to cheer for you at the nationals."

"The regionals, you mean?" Kanade asked with a weak, resigned smile.

"I mean what I say," Taichi persisted. "And I say what I mean. You guys can still do it, especially now that Hokuo's best players have graduated. I don't think they even have an A-class player anymore... And you have two, right?"

"Yes, we do. I wasn't aware you knew. How?"

"Let's just say that Nishida was pretty shaken by seeing Tamaru Midori in the clubroom for the first time."

Taichi was happy to see Kanade let out a chuckle, even if she was clearly trying to stifle it. Then she sighed, her eyes shifting towards the wall clock opposite of her and then back to him. He gave a little nod. He understood.

"Really, go to her," he urged gently. "I have my own business to take care of, too. Thank you for the chat though, I really needed it."

"Same here. I'm happy we could talk."

She gave him one final smile and turned, waving her hand sheepishly in the process. Taichi returned the gesture and the expression alike, and then turned around himself, setting off towards the teacher's office, where he'd been supposed to show up much earlier no doubt.

He was not going to forget his task this time.

He only hoped that Taeko-sensei was still waiting for him there.

[unsettlingshortstories]

The Murders in the Rue Morgue

Edgar Allan Poe (1841)

What song the Syrens sang, or what name Achilles assumed when he hid himself among women, although puzzling questions are not beyond all conjecture. --SIR THOMAS BROWNE, Urn-Burial.

THE mental features discoursed of as the analytical, are, in themselves, but little susceptible of analysis. We appreciate them only in their effects. We know of them, among other things, that they are always to their possessor, when inordinately possessed, a source of the liveliest enjoyment. As the strong man exults in his physical ability, delighting in such exercises as call his muscles into action, so glories the analyst in that moral activity which disentangles. He derives pleasure from even the most trivial occupations bringing his talents into play. He is fond of enigmas, of conundrums, of hieroglyphics; exhibiting in his solutions of each a degree of acumen which appears to the ordinary apprehension preternatural. His results, brought about by the very soul and essence of method, have, in truth, the whole air of intuition. The faculty of re-solution is possibly much invigorated by mathematical study, and especially by that highest branch of it which, unjustly, and merely on account of its retrograde operations, has been called, as if par excellence, analysis. Yet to calculate is not in itself to analyze. A chess-player, for example, does the one without effort at the other. It follows that the game of chess, in its effects upon mental character, is greatly misunderstood. I am not now writing a treatise, but simply prefacing a somewhat peculiar narrative by observations very much at random; I will, therefore, take occasion to assert that the higher powers of the reflective intellect are more decidedly and more usefully tasked by the unostentatious game of draughts than by all the elaborate frivolity of chess. In this latter, where the pieces have different and bizarre motions, with various and variable values, what is only complex is mistaken (a not unusual error) for what is profound. The attention is here called powerfully into play. If it flag for an instant, an oversight is committed, resulting in injury or defeat. The possible moves being not only manifold but involute, the chances of such oversights are multiplied; and in nine cases out of ten it is the more concentrative rather than the more acute player who conquers. In draughts, on the contrary, where the moves are unique and have but little variation, the probabilities of inadvertence are diminished, and the mere attention being left comparatively what advantages are obtained by either party are obtained by superior acumen. To be less abstract --Let us suppose a game of draughts where the pieces are reduced to four kings, and where, of course, no oversight is to be expected. It is obvious that here the victory can be decided (the players being at all equal) only by some recherche movement, the result of some strong exertion of the intellect. Deprived of ordinary resources, the analyst throws himself into the spirit of his opponent, identifies himself therewith, and not unfrequently sees thus, at a glance, the sole methods (sometimes indeed absurdly simple ones) by which he may seduce into error or hurry into miscalculation.

Whist has long been noted for its influence upon what is termed the calculating power; and men of the highest order of intellect have been known to take an apparently unaccountable delight in it, while eschewing chess as frivolous. Beyond doubt there is nothing of a similar nature so greatly tasking the faculty of analysis. The best chess-player in Christendom may be little more than the best player of chess; but proficiency in whist implies capacity for success in all these more important undertakings where mind struggles with mind. When I say proficiency, I mean that perfection in the game which includes a comprehension of all the sources whence legitimate advantage may be derived. These are not only manifold but multiform, and lie frequently among recesses of thought altogether inaccessible to the ordinary understanding. To observe attentively is to remember distinctly; and, so far, the concentrative chess-player will do very well at whist; while the rules of Hoyle (themselves based upon the mere mechanism of the game) are sufficiently and generally comprehensible. Thus to have a retentive memory, and to proceed by "the book," are points commonly regarded as the sum total of good playing. But it is in matters beyond the limits of mere rule that the skill of the analyst is evinced. He makes, in silence, a host of observations and inferences. So, perhaps, do his companions; and the difference in the extent of the information obtained, lies not so much in the validity of the inference as in the quality of the observation. The necessary knowledge is that of what to observe. Our player confines himself not at all; nor, because the game is the object, does he reject deductions from things external to the game. He examines the countenance of his partner, comparing it carefully with that of each of his opponents. He considers the mode of assorting the cards in each hand; often counting trump by trump, and honor by honor, through the glances bestowed by their holders upon each. He notes every variation of face as the play progresses, gathering a fund of thought from the differences in the expression of certainty, of surprise, of triumph, or chagrin. From the manner of gathering up a trick he judges whether the person taking it can make another in the suit. He recognizes what is played through feint, by the air with which it is thrown upon the table. A casual or inadvertent word; the accidental dropping or turning of a card, with the accompanying anxiety or carelessness in regard to its concealment; the counting of the tricks, with the order of their arrangement; embarrassment, hesitation, eagerness or trepidation --all afford, to his apparently intuitive perception, indications of the true state of affairs. The first two or three rounds having been played, he is in full possession of the contents of each hand, and thenceforward puts down his cards with as absolute a precision of purpose as if the rest of the party had turned outward the faces of their own.

The analytical power should not be confounded with simple ingenuity; for while the analyst is necessarily ingenious, the ingenious man often remarkably incapable of analysis. The constructive or combining power, by which ingenuity is usually manifested, and which the phrenologists (I believe erroneously) have assigned a separate organ, supposing it a primitive faculty, has been so frequently seen in those whose intellect bordered otherwise upon idiocy, as to have attracted general observation among writers on morals. Between ingenuity and the analytic ability there exists a difference far greater, indeed, than that between the fancy and the imagination, but of a character very strictly analogous. It will found, in fact, that the ingenious are always fanciful, and the truly imaginative never otherwise than analytic.

The narrative which follows will appear to the reader somewhat in the light of a commentary upon the propositions just advanced.

Residing in Paris during the spring and part of the summer of 18--, I there became acquainted with a Monsieur C. Auguste Dupin. This young gentleman was of an excellent --indeed of an illustrious family, but, by a variety of untoward events, had been reduced to such poverty that the energy of his character succumbed beneath it, and he ceased to bestir himself in the world, or to care for the retrieval of his fortunes. By courtesy of his creditors, there still remained in his possession a small remnant of his patrimony; and, upon the income arising from this, he managed, by means of a rigorous economy, to procure the necessaries of life, without troubling himself about its superfluities. Books, indeed, were his sole luxuries, and in Paris these are easily obtained. Our first meeting was at an obscure library in the Rue Montmartre, where the accident of our both being in search of the same very rare and very remarkable volume, brought us into closer communion. We saw each other again and again. I was deeply interested in the little family history which he detailed to me with all that candor which a Frenchman indulges whenever mere self is the theme. I was astonished, too, at the vast extent of his reading; and, above all, I felt my soul enkindled within me by the wild fervor, and the vivid freshness of his imagination. Seeking in Paris the objects I then sought, I felt that the society of such a man would be to me a treasure beyond price; and this feeling I frankly confided to him. It was at length arranged that we should live together during my stay in the city; and as my worldly circumstances were somewhat less embarrassed than his own, I was permitted to be at the expense of renting, and furnishing in a style which suited the rather fantastic gloom of our common temper, a time-eaten and grotesque mansion, long deserted through superstitions into which we did not inquire, and tottering to its fall in a retired and desolate portion of the Faubourg St. Germain.

Had the routine of our life at this place been known to the world, we should have been regarded as madmen --although, perhaps, as madmen of a harmless nature. Our seclusion was perfect. We admitted no visitors. Indeed the locality of our retirement had been carefully kept a secret from my own former associates; and it had been many years since Dupin had ceased to know or be known in Paris. We existed within ourselves alone.

It was a freak of fancy in my friend (for what else shall I call it?) to be enamored of the Night for her own sake; and into this bizarrerie, as into all his others, I quietly fell; giving myself up to his wild whims with a perfect abandon. The sable divinity would not herself dwell with us always; but we could counterfeit her presence. At the first dawn of the morning we closed all the massy shutters of our old building; lighted a couple of tapers which, strongly perfumed, threw out only the ghastliest and feeblest of rays. By the aid of these we then busied our souls in dreams --reading, writing, or conversing, until warned by the clock of the advent of the true Darkness. Then we sallied forth into the streets, arm and arm, continuing the topics of the day, or roaming far and wide until a late hour, seeking, amid the wild lights and shadows of the populous city, that infinity of mental excitement which quiet observation can afford.

At such times I could not help remarking and admiring (although from his rich ideality I had been prepared to expect it) a peculiar analytic ability in Dupin. He seemed, too, to take an eager delight in its exercise --if not exactly in its display --and did not hesitate to confess the pleasure thus derived. He boasted to me, with a low chuckling laugh, that most men, in respect to himself, wore windows in their bosoms, and was wont to follow up such assertions by direct and very startling proofs of his intimate knowledge of my own. His manner at these moments was frigid and abstract; his eyes were vacant in expression; while his voice, usually a rich tenor, rose into a treble which would have sounded petulantly but for the deliberateness and entire distinctness of the enunciation. Observing him in these moods, I often dwelt meditatively upon the old philosophy of the Bi-Part Soul, and amused myself with the fancy of a double Dupin --the creative and the resolvent.

Let it not be supposed, from what I have just said, that I am detailing any mystery, or penning any romance. What I have described in the Frenchman, was merely the result of an excited, or perhaps of a diseased intelligence. But of the character of his remarks at the periods in question an example will best convey the idea.

We were strolling one night down a long dirty street, in the vicinity of the Palais Royal. Being both, apparently, occupied with thought, neither of us had spoken a syllable for fifteen minutes at least. All at once Dupin broke forth with these words:-

"He is a very little fellow, that's true, and would do better for the Theatre des Varietes."

"There can be no doubt of that," I replied unwittingly, and not at first observing (so much had I been absorbed in reflection) the extraordinary manner in which the speaker had chimed in with my meditations. In an instant afterward I recollected myself, and my astonishment was profound.

"Dupin," said I, gravely, "this is beyond my comprehension. I do not hesitate to say that I am amazed, and can scarcely credit my senses. How was it possible you should know I was thinking of --?" Here I paused, to ascertain beyond a doubt whether he really knew of whom I thought.

--"of Chantilly," said he, "why do you pause? You were remarking to yourself that his diminutive figure unfitted him for tragedy."

This was precisely what had formed the subject of my reflections. Chantilly was a quondam cobbler of the Rue St. Denis, who, becoming stage-mad, had attempted the role of Xerxes, in Crebillon's tragedy so called, and been notoriously Pasquinaded for his pains.

"Tell me, for Heaven's sake," I exclaimed, "the method --if method there is --by which you have been enabled to fathom my soul in this matter." In fact I was even more startled than I would have been willing to express.

"It was the fruiterer," replied my friend, "who brought you to the conclusion that the mender of soles was not of sufficient height for Xerxes et id genus omne."

"The fruiterer! --you astonish me --I know no fruiterer whomsoever."

"The man who ran up against you as we entered the street --it may have been fifteen minutes ago."

I now remembered that, in fact, a fruiterer, carrying upon his head a large basket of apples, had nearly thrown me down, by accident, as we passed from the Rue C-- into the thoroughfare where we stood; but what this had to do with Chantilly I could not possibly understand.

There was not a particle of charlatanerie about Dupin. "I will explain," he said, "and that you may comprehend all clearly, we will explain," he said, "and that you may comprehend all clearly, we will first retrace the course of your meditations, from the moment in which I spoke to you until that of the rencontre with the fruiterer in question. The larger links of the chain run thus --Chantilly, Orion, Dr. Nichols, Epicurus, Stereotomy, the street stones, the fruiterer."

There are few persons who have not, at some period of their lives, amused themselves in retracing the steps by which particular conclusions of their own minds have been attained. The occupation is often full of interest; and he who attempts it for the first time is astonished by the apparently illimitable distance and incoherence between the starting-point and the goal. What, then, must have been my amazement when I heard the Frenchman speak what he had just spoken, and when I could not help acknowledging that he had spoken the truth. He continued:

"We had been talking of horses, if I remember aright, just before leaving the Rue C--. This was the last subject we discussed. As we crossed into this street, a fruiterer, with a large basket upon his head, brushing quickly past us, thrust you upon a pile of paving-stones collected at a spot where the causeway is undergoing repair. You stepped upon one of the loose fragments) slipped, slightly strained your ankle, appeared vexed or sulky, muttered a few words, turned to look at the pile, and then proceeded in silence. I was not particularly attentive to what you did; but observation has become with me, of late, a species of necessity.

"You kept your eyes upon the ground --glancing, with a petulant expression, at the holes and ruts in the pavement, (so that I saw you were still thinking of the stones,) until we reached the little alley called Lamartine, which has been paved, by way of experiment, with the overlapping and riveted blocks. Here your countenance brightened up, and, perceiving your lips move, I could not doubt that you murmured the word 'stereotomy,' a term very affectedly applied to this species of pavement. I knew that you could not say to yourself 'stereotomy' without being brought to think of atomies, and thus of the theories of Epicurus; and since, when we discussed this subject not very long ago, I mentioned to you how singularly, yet with how little notice, the vague guesses of that noble Greek had met with confirmation in the late nebular cosmogony, I felt that you could not avoid casting your eyes upward to the great nebula in Orion, and I certainly expected that you would do so. You did look up; and I was now assured that I had correctly followed your steps. But in that bitter tirade upon Chantilly, which appeared in yesterday's 'Musee,' the satirist, making some disgraceful allusions to the cobbler's change of name upon assuming the buskin, quoted a Latin line about which we have often conversed. I mean the line

Perdidit antiquum litera prima sonum.

I had told you that this was in reference to Orion, formerly written Urion; and, from certain pungencies connected with this explanation, I was aware that you could not have forgotten it. It was clear, therefore, that you would not fall to combine the ideas of Orion and Chantilly. That you did combine them I say by the character of the smile which passed over your lips. You thought of the poor cobbler's immolation. So far, you had been stooping in your gait; but now I saw you draw yourself up to your full height. I was then sure that you reflected upon the diminutive figure of Chantilly. At this point I interrupted your meditations to remark that as, in fact, he was a very little fellow --that Chantilly --he would do better at the Theatre des Varietes."

Not long after this, we were looking over an evening edition of the "Gazette des Tribunaux," when the following paragraphs arrested our attention.

"Extraordinary Murders. --This morning, about three o'clock, the inhabitants of the Quartier St. Roch were aroused from sleep by a succession of terrific shrieks, issuing, apparently, from the fourth story of a house in the Rue Morgue, known to be in the sole occupancy of one Madame L'Espanaye, and her daughter, Mademoiselle Camille L'Espanaye. After some delay, occasioned by a fruitless attempt to procure admission in the usual manner, the gateway was broken in with a crowbar, and eight or ten of the neighbors entered, accompanied by two gendarmes. By this time the cries had ceased; but, as the party rushed up the first flight of stairs, two or more rough voices, in angry contention, were distinguished, and seemed to proceed from the upper part of the house. As the second landing was reached, these sounds, also, had ceased, and everything remained perfectly quiet. The party spread themselves, and hurried from room to room. Upon arriving at a large back chamber in the fourth story, (the door of which, being found locked, with the key inside, was forced open,) a spectacle presented itself which struck every one present not less with horror than with astonishment.

"The apartment was in the wildest disorder --the furniture broken and thrown about in all directions. There was only one bedstead; and from this the bed had been removed, and thrown into the middle of the floor. On a chair lay a razor, besmeared with blood. On the hearth were two or three long and thick tresses of grey human hair, also dabbled in blood, and seeming to have been pulled out by the roots. Upon the floor were found four Napoleons, an ear-ring of topaz, three large silver spoons, three smaller of metal d'Alger, and two bags, containing nearly four thousand francs in gold. The drawers of a bureau, which stood in one corner, were open, and had been, apparently, rifled, although many articles still remained in them. A small iron safe was discovered under the bed (not under the bedstead). It was open, with the key still in the door. It had no contents beyond a few old letters, and other papers of little consequence.

"Of Madame L'Espanaye no traces were here seen; but an unusual quantity of soot being observed in the fire-place, a search was made in the chimney, and (horrible to relate!) the corpse of the daughter, head downward, was dragged therefrom; it having been thus forced up the narrow aperture for a considerable distance. The body was quite warm. Upon examining it, many excoriations were perceived, no doubt occasioned by the violence with which it had been thrust up and disengaged. Upon the face were many severe scratches, and, upon the throat, dark bruises, and deep indentations of finger nails, as if the deceased had been throttled to death.

"After a thorough investigation of every portion of the house, without farther discovery, the party made its way into a small paved yard in the rear of the building, where lay the corpse of the old lady, with her throat so entirely cut that, upon an attempt to raise her, the head fell off. The body, as well as the head, was fearfully mutilated --the former so much so as scarcely to retain any semblance of humanity.

"To this horrible mystery there is not as yet, we believe, the slightest clew."

The next day's paper had these additional particulars.

"The Tragedy in the Rue Morgue. Many individuals have been examined in relation to this most extraordinary and frightful affair," [The word 'affaire' has not yet, in France, that levity of import which it conveys with us] "but nothing whatever has transpired to throw light upon We give below all the material testimony elicited.

"Pauline Dubourg, laundress, deposes that she has known both the deceased for three years, having washed for them during that period. The old lady and her daughter seemed on good terms-very affectionate towards each other. They were excellent pay. Could not speak in regard to their mode or means of living. Believed that Madame L. told fortunes for a living. Was reputed to have money put by. Never met any persons in the house when she called for the clothes or took them home. Was sure that they had no servant in employ. There appeared to be no furniture in any part of the building except in the fourth story.

"Pierre Moreau, tobacconist, deposes that he has been in the habit of selling small quantities of tobacco and snuff to Madame L'Espanaye for nearly four years. Was born in the neighborhood, and has always resided there. The deceased and her daughter had occupied the house in which the corpses were found, for more than six years. It was formerly occupied by a jeweller, who under-let the upper rooms to various persons. The house was the property of Madame L. She became dissatisfied with the abuse of the premises by her tenant, and moved into them herself, refusing to let any portion. The old lady was childish. Witness had seen the daughter some five or six times during the six years. The two lived an exceedingly retired life --were reputed to have money. Had heard it said among the neighbors that Madame L. told fortunes --did not believe it. Had never seen any person enter the door except the old lady and her daughter, a porter once or twice, and a physician some eight or ten times.

"Many other persons, neighbors, gave evidence to the same effect. No one was spoken of as frequenting the house. It was not known whether there were any living connexions of Madame L. and her daughter. The shutters of the front windows were seldom opened. Those in the rear were always closed, with the exception of the large back room, fourth story. The house was a good house --not very old.

"Isidore Muset, gendarme, deposes that he was called to the house about three o'clock in the morning, and found some twenty or thirty persons at the gateway, endeavoring to gain admittance. Forced it open, at length, with a bayonet --not with a crowbar. Had but little difficulty in getting it open, on account of its being a double or folding gate, and bolted neither at bottom nor top. The shrieks were continued until the gate was forced --and then suddenly ceased. They seemed to be screams of some person (or persons) in great agony --were loud and drawn out, not short and quick. Witness led the way up stairs. Upon reaching the first landing, heard two voices in loud and angry contention-the one a gruff voice, the other much shriller --a very strange voice. Could distinguish some words of the former, which was that of a Frenchman. Was positive that it was not a woman's voice. Could distinguish the words 'sacre' and 'diable.' The shrill voice was that of a foreigner. Could not be sure whether it was the voice of a man or of a woman. Could not make out what was said, but believed the language to be Spanish. The state of the room and of the bodies was described by this witness as we described them yesterday.

"Henri Duval, a neighbor, and by trade a silversmith, deposes that he was one of the party who first entered the house. Corroborates the testimony of Muset in general. As soon as they forced an entrance, they reclosed the door, to keep out the crowd, which collected very fast, notwithstanding the lateness of the hour. The shrill voice, the witness thinks, was that of an Italian. Was certain it was not French. Could not be sure that it was a man's voice. It might have been a woman's. Was not acquainted with the Italian language. Could not distinguish the words, but was convinced by the intonation that the speaker was an Italian. Knew Madame L. and her daughter. Had conversed with both frequently. Was sure that the shrill voice was not that of either of the deceased. "--Odenheimer, restaurateur. This witness volunteered his testimony. Not speaking French, was examined through an interpreter. Is a native of Amsterdam. Was passing the house at the time of the shrieks. They lasted for several minutes --probably ten. They were long and loud --very awful and distressing. Was one of those who entered the building. Corroborated the previous evidence in every respect but one. Was sure that the shrill voice was that of a man --of a Frenchman. Could not distinguish the words uttered. They were loud and quick --unequal --spoken apparently in fear as well as in anger. The voice was harsh --not so much shrill as harsh. Could not call it a shrill voice. The gruff voice said repeatedly 'sacre,' 'diable' and once 'mon Dieu.'

"Jules Mignaud, banker, of the firm of Mignaud et Fils, Rue Deloraine. Is the elder Mignaud. Madame L'Espanaye had some property. Had opened an account with his baking house in the spring of the year --(eight years previously). Made frequent deposits in small sums. Had checked for nothing until the third day before her death, when she took out in person the sum of 4000 francs. This sum was paid in gold, and a clerk sent home with the money.

"Adolphe Le Bon, clerk to Mignaud et Fils, deposes that on the day in question, about noon, he accompanied Madame L'Espanaye to her residence with the 4000 francs, put up in two bags. Upon the door being opened, Mademoiselle L. appeared and took from his hands one of the bags, while the old lady relieved him of the other. He then bowed and departed. Did not see any person in the street at the time. It is a bye-street --very lonely.

William Bird, tailor, deposes that he was one of the party who entered the house. Is an Englishman. Has lived in Paris two years. Was one of the first to ascend the stairs. Heard the voices in contention. The gruff voice was that of a Frenchman. Could make out several words, but cannot now remember all. Heard distinctly 'sacre' and 'mon Dieu.' There was a sound at the moment as if of several persons struggling --a scraping and scuffling sound. The shrill voice was very loud --louder than the gruff one. Is sure that it was not the voice of an Englishman. Appeared to be that of a German. Might have been a woman's voice. Does not understand German.

"Four of the above-named witnesses, being recalled, deposed that the door of the chamber in which was found the body of Mademoiselle L. was locked on the inside when the party reached it. Every thing was perfectly silent --no groans or noises of any kind. Upon forcing the door no person was seen. The windows, both of the back and front room, were down and firmly fastened from within. A door between the two rooms was closed, but not locked. The door leading from the front room into the passage was locked, with the key on the inside. A small room in the front of the house, on the fourth story, at the head of the passage, was open, the door being ajar. This room was crowded with old beds, boxes, and so forth. These were carefully removed and searched. There was not an inch of any portion of the house which was not carefully searched. Sweeps were sent up and down the chimneys. The house was a four story one, with garrets (mansardes). A trap-door on the roof was nailed down very securely --did not appear to have been opened for years. The time elapsing between the hearing of the voices in contention and the breaking open of the room door, was variously stated by the witnesses. Some made it as short as three minutes --some as long as five. The door was opened with difficulty.

"Alfonzo Garcio, undertaker, deposes that he resides in the Rue Morgue. Is a native of Spain. Was one of the party who entered the house. Did not proceed up stairs. Is nervous, and was apprehensive of the consequences of agitation. Heard the voices in contention. The gruff voice was that of a Frenchman. Could not distinguish what was said. The shrill voice was that of an Englishman --is sure of this. Does not understand the English language, but judges by the intonation.

"Alberto Montani, confectioner, deposes that he was among the first to ascend the stairs. Heard the voices in question. The gruff voice was that of a Frenchman. Distinguished several words. The speaker appeared to be expostulating. Could not make out the words of the shrill voice. Spoke quick and unevenly. Thinks it the voice of a Russian. Corroborates the general testimony. Is an Italian. Never conversed with a native of Russia.

"Several witnesses, recalled, here testified that the chimneys of all the rooms on the fourth story were too narrow to admit the passage of a human being. By 'sweeps' were meant cylindrical sweeping-brushes, such as are employed by those who clean chimneys. These brushes were passed up and down every flue in the house. There is no back passage by which any one could have descended while the party proceeded up stairs. The body of Mademoiselle L'Espanaye was so firmly wedged in the chimney that it could not be got down until four or five of the party united their strength.

"Paul Dumas, physician, deposes that he was called to view the bodies about day-break. They were both then lying on the sacking of the bedstead in the chamber where Mademoiselle L. was found. The corpse of the young lady was much bruised and excoriated. The fact that it had been thrust up the chimney would sufficiently account for these appearances. The throat was greatly chafed. There were several deep scratches just below the chin, together with a series of livid spots which were evidently the impression of fingers. The face was fearfully discolored, and the eye-balls protruded. The tongue had been partially bitten through. A large bruise was discovered upon the pit of the stomach, produced, apparently, by the pressure of a knee. In the opinion of M. Dumas, Mademoiselle L'Espanaye had been throttled to death by some person or persons unknown. The corpse of the mother was horribly mutilated. All the bones of the right leg and arm were more or less shattered. The left tibia much splintered, as well as all the ribs of the left side. Whole body dreadfully bruised and discolored. It was not possible to say how the injuries had been inflicted. A heavy club of wood, or a broad bar of iron --a chair --any large, heavy, and obtuse weapon have produced such results, if wielded by the hands of a very powerful man. No woman could have inflicted the blows with any weapon. The head of the deceased, when seen by witness, was entirely separated from the body, and was also greatly shattered. The throat had evidently been cut with some very sharp instrument --probably with a razor.

"Alexandre Etienne, surgeon, was called with M. Dumas to view the bodies. Corroborated the testimony, and the opinions of M. Dumas.

"Nothing farther of importance was elicited, although several other persons were examined. A murder so mysterious, and so perplexing in all its particulars, was never before committed in Paris --if indeed a murder has been committed at all. The police are entirely at fault --an unusual occurrence in affairs of this nature. There is not, however, the shadow of a clew apparent."

The evening edition of the paper stated that the greatest excitement continued in the Quartier St. Roch --that the premises in question had been carefully re-searched, and fresh examinations of witnesses instituted, but all to no purpose. A postscript, however mentioned that Adolphe Le Bon had been arrested and imprisoned --although nothing appeared to criminate him, beyond the facts already detailed. Dupin seemed singularly interested in the progress of this affair --at least so I judged from his manner, for he made no comments. It was only after the announcement that Le Bon had been imprisoned, that he asked me my opinion respecting the murders.

I could merely agree with all Paris in considering them an insoluble mystery. I saw no means by which it would be possible to trace the murderer.

"We must not judge of the means," said Dupin, "by this shell of an examination. The Parisian police, so much extolled for acumen, are cunning, but no more. There is no method in their proceedings, beyond the method of the moment. They make a vast parade of measures; but, not unfrequently, these are so ill adapted to the objects proposed, as to put us in mind of Monsieur Jourdain's calling for his robe-de-chambre --pour mieux entendre la musique. The results attained by them are not unfrequently surprising, but, for the most part, are brought about by simple diligence and activity. When these qualities are unavailing, their schemes fall. Vidocq, for example, was a good guesser, and a persevering man. But, without educated thought, he erred continually by the very intensity of his investigations. He impaired his vision by holding the object too close. He might see, perhaps, one or two points with unusual clearness, but in so doing he, necessarily, lost sight of the matter as a whole. Thus there is such a thing as being too profound. Truth is not always in a well. In fact, as regards the more important knowledge, I do believe that she is invariably superficial. The depth lies in the valleys where we seek her, and not upon the mountain-tops where she is found. The modes and sources of this kind of error are well typified in the contemplation of the heavenly bodies. To look at a star by glances --to view it in a side-long way, by turning toward it the exterior portions of the retina (more susceptible of feeble impressions of light than the interior), is to behold the star distinctly --is to have the best appreciation of its lustre --a lustre which grows dim just in proportion as we turn our vision fully upon it. A greater number of rays actually fall upon the eye in the latter case, but, in the former, there is the more refined capacity for comprehension. By undue profundity we perplex and enfeeble thought; and it is possible to make even Venus herself vanish from the firmament by a scrutiny too sustained, too concentrated, or too direct.

"As for these murders, let us enter into some examinations for ourselves, before we make up an opinion respecting them. An inquiry will afford us amusement," (I thought this an odd term, so applied, but said nothing) "and, besides, Le Bon once rendered me a service for which I am not ungrateful. We will go and see the premises with our own eyes. I know G--, the Prefect of Police, and shall have no difficulty in obtaining the necessary permission."

The permission was obtained, and we proceeded at once to the Rue Morgue. This is one of those miserable thoroughfares which intervene between the Rue Richelieu and the Rue St. Roch. It was late in the afternoon when we reached it; as this quarter is at a great distance from that in which we resided. The house was readily found; for there were still many persons gazing up at the closed shutters, with an objectless curiosity, from the opposite side of the way. It was an ordinary Parisian house, with a gateway, on one side of which was a glazed watch-box, with a sliding way, on one si panel in the window, indicating a loge de concierge. Before going in we walked up the street, turned down an alley, and then, again turning, passed in the rear of the building-Dupin, meanwhile, examining the whole neighborhood, as well as the house, with a minuteness of attention for which I could see no possible object. Retracing our steps, we came again to the front of the dwelling, rang, and, having shown our credentials, were admitted by the agents in charge. We went up stairs --into the chamber where the body of Mademoiselle L'Espanaye had been found, and where both the deceased still lay. The disorders of the room had, as usual, been suffered to exist. I saw nothing beyond what had been stated in the "Gazette des Tribunaux." Dupin scrutinized every thing-not excepting the bodies of the victims. We then went into the other rooms, and into the yard; a gendarme accompanying us throughout. The examination occupied us until dark, when we took our departure. On our way home my companion stopped in for a moment at the office of one of the dally papers.

I have said that the whims of my friend were manifold, and that Fe les menageais: --for this phrase there is no English equivalent. It was his humor, now, to decline all conversation on the subject of the murder, until about noon the next day. He then asked me, suddenly, if I had observed any thing peculiar at the scene of the atrocity.

There was something in his manner of emphasizing the word "peculiar," which caused me to shudder, without knowing why.

"No, nothing peculiar," I said; "nothing more, at least, than we both saw stated in the paper."

"The 'Gazette,'" he replied, "has not entered, I fear, into the unusual horror of the thing. But dismiss the idle opinions of this print. It appears to me that this mystery is considered insoluble, for the very reason which should cause it to be regarded as easy of solution --I mean for the outre character of its features. The police are confounded by the seeming absence of motive --not for the murder itself --but for the atrocity of the murder. They are puzzled, too, by the seeming impossibility of reconciling the voices heard in contention, with the facts that no one was discovered up stairs but the assassinated Mademoiselle L'Espanaye, and that there were no means of egress without the notice of the party ascending. The wild disorder of the room; the corpse thrust, with the head downward, up the chimney; the frightful mutilation of the body of the old lady; these considerations with those just mentioned, and others which I need not mention, have sufficed to paralyze the powers, by putting completely at fault the boasted acumen, of the government agents. They have fallen into the gross but common error of confounding the unusual with the abstruse. But it is by these deviations from the plane of the ordinary, that reason feels its way, if at all, in its search for the true. In investigations such as we are now pursuing, it should not be so much asked 'what has occurred,' as 'what has occurred that has never occurred before.' In fact, the facility with which I shall arrive, or have arrived, at the solution of this mystery, is in the direct ratio of its apparent insolubility in the eyes of the police."

I stared at the speaker in mute astonishment.

"I am now awaiting," continued he, looking toward the door of our apartment --"I am now awaiting a person who, although perhaps not the perpetrator of these butcheries, must have been in some measure implicated in their perpetration. Of the worst portion of the crimes committed, it is probable that he is innocent. I hope that I am right in this supposition; for upon it I build my expectation of reading the entire riddle. I look for the man here --in this room --every moment. It is true that he may not arrive; but the probability is that he will. Should he come, it will be necessary to detain him. Here are pistols; and we both know how to use them when occasion demands their use."

I took the pistols, scarcely knowing what I did, or believing what I heard, while Dupin went on, very much as if in a soliloquy. I have already spoken of his abstract manner at such times. His discourse was addressed to myself; but his voice, although by no means loud, had that intonation which is commonly employed in speaking to some one at a great distance. His eyes, vacant in expression, regarded only the wall.

"That the voices heard in contention," he said, "by the party upon the stairs, were not the voices of the women themselves, was fully proved by the evidence. This relieves us of all doubt upon the question whether the old lady could have first destroyed the daughter, and afterward have committed suicide. I speak of this point chiefly for the sake of method; for the strength of Madame L'Espanaye would have been utterly unequal to the task of thrusting her daughter's corpse up the chimney as it was found; and the nature of the wounds upon her own person entirely preclude the idea of self-destruction. Murder, then, has been committed by some third party; and the voices of this third party were those heard in contention. Let me now advert --not to the whole testimony respecting these voices --but to what was peculiar in that testimony. Did you observe anything peculiar about it?"

I remarked that, while all the witnesses agreed in supposing the gruff voice to be that of a Frenchman, there was much disagreement in regard to the shrill, or, as one individual termed it, the harsh voice.

"That was the evidence itself," said Dupin, "but it was not the peculiarity of the evidence. You have observed nothing distinctive. Yet there was something to be observed. The witnesses, as you remark, agreed about the gruff voice; they were here unanimous. But in regard to the shrill voice, the peculiarity is not that they disagreed --but that, while an Italian, an Englishman, a Spaniard, a Hollander, and a Frenchman attempted to describe it, each one spoke of it as that of a foreigner. Each is sure that it was not the voice of one of his own countrymen. Each likens it --not to the voice of an individual of any nation with whose language he is conversant --but the converse. The Frenchman supposes it the voice of a Spaniard, and 'might have distinguished some words had he been acquainted with the Spanish.' The Dutchman maintains it to have been that of a Frenchman; but we find it stated that 'not understanding French this witness was examined through an interpreter.' The Englishman thinks it the voice of a German, and 'does not understand German.' The Spaniard 'is sure' that it was that of an Englishman, but 'judges by the intonation' altogether, 'as he has no knowledge of the English.' The Italian believes it the voice of a Russian, but 'has never conversed with a native of Russia.' A second Frenchman differs, moreover, with the first, and is positive that the voice was that of an Italian; but, not being cognizant of that tongue, is, like the Spaniard, 'convinced by the intonation.' Now, how strangely unusual must that voice have really been, about which such testimony as this could have been elicited! --in whose tones, even, denizens of the five great divisions of Europe could recognise nothing familiar! You will say that it might have been the voice of an Asiatic --of an African. Neither Asiatics nor Africans abound in Paris; but, without denying the inference, I will now merely call your attention to three points. The voice is termed by one witness 'harsh rather than shrill.' It is represented by two others to have been 'quick and unequal' No words --no sounds resembling words --were by any witness mentioned as distinguishable.

"I know not," continued Dupin, "what impression I may have made, so far, upon your own understanding; but I do not hesitate to say that legitimate deductions even from this portion of the testimony --the portion respecting the gruff and shrill voices --are in themselves sufficient to engender a suspicion which should give direction to all farther progress in the investigation of the mystery. I said 'legitimate deductions;' but my meaning is not thus fully expressed. I designed to imply that the deductions are the sole proper ones, and that the suspicion arises inevitably from them as the single result. What the suspicion is, however, I will not say just yet. I merely wish you to bear in mind that, with myself, it was sufficiently forcible to give a definite form --a certain tendency --to my inquiries in the chamber.

"Let us now transport ourselves, in fancy, to this chamber. What shall we first seek here? The means of egress employed by the murderers. It is not too much to say that neither of us believe in praeternatural events. Madame and Mademoiselle L'Espanaye were not destroyed by spirits. The doers of the deed were material, and escaped materially. Then how? Fortunately, there is but one mode of reasoning upon the point, and that mode must lead us to a definite decision. --Let us examine, each by each, the possible means of egress. It is clear that the assassins were in the room where Mademoiselle L'Espanaye was found, or at least in the room adjoining, when the party ascended the stairs. It is then only from these two apartments that we have to seek issues. The police have laid bare the floors, the ceilings, and the masonry of the walls, in every direction. No secret issues could have escaped their vigilance. But, not trusting to their eyes, I examined with my own. There were, then, no secret issues. Both doors leading from the rooms into the passage were securely locked, with the keys inside. Let us turn to the chimneys. These, although of ordinary width for some eight or ten feet above the hearths, will not admit, throughout their extent, the body of a large cat. The impossibility of egress, by means already stated, being thus absolute, we are reduced to the windows. Through those of the front room no one could have escaped without notice from the crowd in the street. The murderers must have passed, then, through those of the back room. Now, brought to this conclusion in so unequivocal a manner as we are, it is not our part, as reasoners, to reject it on account of apparent impossibilities. It is only left for us to prove that these apparent 'impossibilities' are, in reality, not such.

"There are two windows in the chamber. One of them is unobstructed by furniture, and is wholly visible. The lower portion of the other is hidden from view by the head of the unwieldy bedstead which is thrust close up against it. The former was found securely fastened from within. It resisted the utmost force of those who endeavored to raise it. A large gimlet-hole had been pierced in its frame to the left, and a very stout nail was found fitted therein, nearly to the head. Upon examining the other window, a similar nail was seen similarly fitted in it; and a vigorous attempt to raise this sash, failed also. The police were now entirely satisfied that egress had not been in these directions. And, therefore, it was thought a matter of supererogation to withdraw the nails and open the windows.

"My own examination was somewhat more particular, and was so for the reason I have just given --because here it was, I knew, that all apparent impossibilities must be proved to be not such in reality.

"I proceeded to think thus --a posteriori. The murderers did escape from one of these windows. This being so, they could not have re-fastened the sashes from the inside, as they were found fastened; --the consideration which put a stop, through its obviousness, to the scrutiny of the police in this quarter. Yet the sashes were fastened. They must, then, have the power of fastening themselves. There was no escape from this conclusion. I stepped to the unobstructed casement, withdrew the nail with some difficulty, and attempted to raise the sash. It resisted all my efforts, as I had anticipated. A concealed spring must, I now knew, exist; and this corroboration of my idea convinced me that my premises, at least, were correct, however mysterious still appeared the circumstances attending the nails. A careful search soon brought to light the hidden spring. I pressed it, and, satisfied with the discovery, forebore to upraise the sash.

"I now replaced the nail and regarded it attentively. A person passing out through this window might have reclosed it, and the spring would have caught --but the nail could not have been replaced. The conclusion was plain, and again narrowed in the field of my investigations. The assassins must have escaped through the other window. Supposing, then, the springs upon each sash to be the same, as was probable, there must be found a difference between the nails, or at least between the modes of their fixture. Getting upon the sacking of the bedstead, I looked over the headboard minutely at the second casement. Passing my hand down behind the board, I readily discovered and pressed the spring, which was, as I had supposed, identical in character with its neighbor. I now looked at the nail. It was as stout as the other, and apparently fitted in the same manner --driven in nearly up to the head.

"You will say that I was puzzled; but, if you think so, you must have misunderstood the nature of the inductions. To use a sporting phrase, I had not been once 'at fault.' The scent had never for an instant been lost. There was no flaw in any link of the chain. I had traced the secret to its ultimate result, --and that result was the nail. It had, I say, in every respect, the appearance of its fellow in the other window; but this fact was an absolute nullity (conclusive as it might seem to be) when compared with the consideration that here, at this point, terminated the clew. 'There must be something wrong,' I said, 'about the nail.' I touched it; and the head, with about a quarter of an inch of the shank, came off in my fingers. The rest of the shank was in the gimlet-hole, where it had been broken off. The fracture was an old one (for its edges were incrusted with rust), and had apparently been accomplished by the blow of a hammer, which had partially imbedded, in the top of the bottom sash, the head portion of the nail. now carefully replaced this head portion in the indentation whence I had taken it, and the resemblance to a perfect nail was complete-the fissure was invisible. Pressing the spring, I gently raised the sash for a few inches; the head went up with it, remaining firm in its bed. I closed the window, and the semblance of the whole nail was again perfect.

"The riddle, so far, was now unriddled. The assassin had escaped through the window which looked upon the bed. Dropping of its own accord upon his exit (or perhaps purposely closed) it had become fastened by the spring; and it was the retention of this spring which had been mistaken by the police for that of the nail, --farther inquiry being thus considered unnecessary.

"The next question is that of the mode of descent. Upon this point I had been satisfied in my walk with you around the building. About five feet and a half from the casement in question there runs a lightning-rod. From this rod it would have been impossible for any one to reach the window itself, to say nothing of entering it. I observed, however, that shutters of the fourth story were of the peculiar kind called by Parisian carpenters ferrades --a kind rarely employed at the present day, but frequently seen upon very old mansions at Lyons and Bordeaux. They are in the form of an ordinary door, (a single, not a folding door) except that the upper half is latticed or worked in open trellis --thus affording an excellent hold for the hands. In the present instance these shutters are fully three feet and a half broad. When we saw them from the rear of the house, they were both about half open --that is to say, they stood off at right angles from the wall. It is probable that the police, as well as myself, examined the back of the tenement; but, if so, in looking at these ferrades in the line of their breadth (as they must have done), they did not perceive this great breadth itself, or, at all events, failed to take it into due consideration. In fact, having once satisfied themselves that no egress could have been made in this quarter, they would naturally bestow here a very cursory examination. It was clear to me, however, that the shutter belonging to the window at the head of the bed, would, if swung fully back to the wall, reach to within two feet of the lightning-rod. It was also evident that, by exertion of a very unusual degree of activity and courage, an entrance into the window, from the rod, might have been thus effected. --By reaching to the distance of two feet and a half (we now suppose the shutter open to its whole extent) a robber might have taken a firm grasp upon the trellis-work. Letting go, then, his hold upon the rod, placing his feet securely against the wall, and springing boldly from it, he might have swung the shutter so as to close it, and, if we imagine the window open at the time, might have swung himself into the room.

"I wish you to bear especially in mind that I have spoken of a very unusual degree of activity as requisite to success in so hazardous and so difficult a feat. It is my design to show you, first, that the thing might possibly have been accomplished: --but, secondly and chiefly, I wish to impress upon your understanding the very extraordinary --the almost praeternatural character of that agility which could have accomplished it.

"You will say, no doubt, using the language of the law, that 'to make out my case' I should rather undervalue, than insist upon a full estimation of the activity required in this matter. This may be the practice in law, but it is not the usage of reason. My ultimate object is only the truth. My immediate purpose is to lead you to place in juxta-position that very unusual activity of which I have just spoken, with that very peculiar shrill (or harsh) and unequal voice, about whose nationality no two persons could be found to agree, and in whose utterance no syllabification could be detected."

At these words a vague and half-formed conception of the meaning of Dupin flitted over my mind. I seemed to be upon the verge of comprehension, without power to comprehend --as men, at times, find themselves upon the brink of remembrance, without being able, in the end, to remember. My friend went on with his discourse.

"You will see," he said, "that I have shifted the question from the mode of egress to that of ingress. It was my design to suggest that both were effected in the same manner, at the same point. Let us now revert to the interior of the room. Let us survey the appearances here. The drawers of the bureau, it is said, had been rifled, although many articles of apparel still remained within them. The conclusion here is absurd. It is a mere guess --a very silly one --and no more. How are we to know that the articles found in the drawers were not all these drawers had originally contained? Madame L'Espanaye and her daughter lived an exceedingly retired life --saw no company --seldom went out --had little use for numerous changes of habiliment. Those found were at least of as good quality as any likely to be possessed by these ladies. If a thief had taken any, why did he not take the best --why did he not take all? In a word, why did he abandon four thousand francs in gold to encumber himself with a bundle of linen? The gold was abandoned. Nearly the whole sum mentioned by Monsieur Mignaud, the banker, was discovered, in bags, upon the floor. I wish you, therefore, to discard from your thoughts the blundering idea of motive, engendered in the brains of the police by that portion of the evidence which speaks of money delivered at the door of the house. Coincidences ten times as remarkable as this (the delivery of the money, and murder committed within three days upon the party receiving it), happen to all of us every hour of our lives, without attracting even momentary notice. Coincidences, in general, are great stumbling-blocks in the way of that class of thinkers who have been educated to know nothing of the theory of probabilities --that theory to which the most glorious objects of human research are indebted for the most glorious of illustration. In the present instance, had the gold been gone, the fact of its delivery three days before would have formed something more than a coincidence. It would have been corroborative of this idea of motive. But, under the real circumstances of the case, if we are to suppose gold the motive of this outrage, we must also imagine the perpetrator so vacillating an idiot as to have abandoned his gold and his motive together.

"Keeping now steadily in mind the points to which I have drawn your attention --that peculiar voice, that unusual agility, and that startling absence of motive in a murder so singularly atrocious as this --let us glance at the butchery itself. Here is a woman strangled to death by manual strength, and thrust up a chimney, head downward. Ordinary assassins employ no such modes of murder as this. Least of all, do they thus dispose of the murdered. In the manner of thrusting the corpse up the chimney, you will that there was something excessively outre --something altogether irreconcilable with our common notions of human action, even when we suppose the actors the most depraved of men. Think, too, how great must have been that strength which could have thrust the body up such an aperture so forcibly that the united vigor of several persons was found barely sufficient to drag it down!

"Turn, now, to other indications of the employment of a vigor most marvellous. On the hearth were thick tresses --very thick tresses --of grey human hair. These had been torn out by the roots. You are aware of the great force necessary in tearing thus from the head even twenty or thirty hairs together. You saw the locks in question as well as myself. Their roots (a hideous sight!) were clotted with fragments of the flesh of the scalp --sure token of the prodigious power which had been exerted in uprooting perhaps half a million of hairs at a time. The throat of the old lady was not merely cut, but the head absolutely severed from the body: the instrument was a mere razor. I wish you also to look at the brutal ferocity of these deeds. Of the bruises upon the body of Madame L'Espanaye I do not speak. Monsieur Dumas, and his worthy coadjutor Monsieur Etienne, have pronounced that they were inflicted by some obtuse instrument; and so far thesegentlemen are very correct. The obtuse instrument was clearly the stone pavement in the yard, upon which the victim had fallen from the window which looked in upon the bed. This idea, however simple it may now seem, escaped the police for the same reason that the breadth of the shutters escaped them --because, by the affair of the nails, their perceptions had been hermetically sealed against the possibility of the windows have ever been opened at all.

If now, in addition to all these things, you have properly reflected upon the odd disorder of the chamber, we have gone so far as to combine the ideas of an agility astounding, a strength superhuman, a ferocity brutal, a butchery without motive, a grotesquerie in horror absolutely alien from humanity, and a voice foreign in tone to the ears of men of many nations, and devoid of all distinct or intelligible syllabification. What result, then, has ensued? What impression have I made upon your fancy?"

I felt a creeping of the flesh as Dupin asked me the question. "A madman," I said, "has done this deed --some raving maniac, escaped from a neighboring Maison de Sante."

"In some respects," he replied, "your idea is not irrelevant. But the voices of madmen, even in their wildest paroxysms, are never found to tally with that peculiar voice heard upon the stairs. Madmen are of some nation, and their language, however incoherent in its words, has always the coherence of syllabification. Besides, the hair of a madman is not such as I now hold in my hand. I disentangled this little tuft from the rigidly clutched fingers of Madame L'Espanaye. Tell me what you can make of it."

"Dupin!" I said, completely unnerved; "this hair is most unusual --this is no human hair."

"I have not asserted that it is," said he; "but, before we decide this point, I wish you to glance at the little sketch I have here traced upon this paper. It is a fac-simile drawing of what has been described in one portion of the testimony as 'dark bruises, and deep indentations of finger nails,' upon the throat of Mademoiselle L'Espanaye, and in another, (by Messrs. Dumas and Etienne,) as a 'series of livid spots, evidently the impression of fingers.'

"You will perceive," continued my friend, spreading out the paper upon the table before us, "that this drawing gives the idea of a firm and fixed hold. There is no slipping apparent. Each finger has retained --possibly until the death of the victim --the fearful grasp by which it originally imbedded itself. Attempt, now, to place all your fingers, at the same time, in the respective impressions as you see them."

I made the attempt in vain.

"We are possibly not giving this matter a fair trial," he said. "The paper is spread out upon a plane surface; but the human throat is cylindrical. Here is a billet of wood, the circumference of which is about that of the throat. Wrap the drawing around it, and try the experiment again."

I did so; but the difficulty was even more obvious than before.

"This," I said, "is the mark of no human hand."

"Read now," replied Dupin, "this passage from Cuvier." It was a minute anatomical and generally descriptive account of the large fulvous Ourang-Outang of the East Indian Islands. The gigantic stature, the prodigious strength and activity, the wild ferocity, and the imitative propensities of these mammalia are sufficiently well known to all. I understood the full horrors of the murder at once.

"The description of the digits," said I, as I made an end of reading, "is in exact accordance with this drawing, I see that no animal but an Ourang-Outang, of the species here mentioned, could have impressed the indentations as you have traced them. This tuft of tawny hair, too, is identical in character with that of the beast of Cuvier. But I cannot possibly comprehend the particulars of this frightful mystery. Besides, there were two voices heard in contention, and one of them was unquestionably the voice of a Frenchman."

True; and you will remember an expression attributed almostunanimously, by the evidence, to this voice, --the expression, 'mon Dieu!' This, under the circumstances, has been justly characterized by one of the witnesses (Montani, the confectioner,) as an expression of remonstrance or expostulation. Upon these two words, therefore, I have mainly built my hopes of a full solution of the riddle. A Frenchman was cognizant of the murder. It is possible --indeed it is far more than probable --that he was innocent of all participation in the bloody transactions which took place. The Ourang-Outang may have escaped from him. He may have traced it to the chamber; but, under the agitating circumstances which ensued, he could never have re-captured it. It is still at large. I will not pursue these guesses-for I have no right to call them more --since the shades of reflection upon which they are based are scarcely of sufficient depth to be appreciable by my own intellect, and since I could not pretend to make them intelligible to the understanding of another. We will call them guesses then, and speak of them as such. If the Frenchman in question is indeed, as I suppose, innocent of this atrocity, this advertisement, which I left last night, upon our return home, at the office of 'Le Monde,' (a paper devoted to the shipping interest, and much sought by sailors,) will bring him to our residence." He handed me a paper, and I read thus:

Caught --In the Bois de Boulogne, early in the morning of the --inst., (the morning of the murder,) a very large, tawny Ourang-Outang of the Bornese species. The owner, (who is ascertained to be a sailor, belonging to a Maltese vessel,) may have the animal again, upon identifying it satisfactorily, and paying a few charges arising from its capture and keeping. Call at No.--, Rue --, Faubourg St. Germain --au troisieme.

"How was it possible," I asked, "that you should know the man to be a sailor, and belonging to a Maltese vessel?" "I do not know it," said Dupin. "I am not sure of it. Here, however, is a small piece of ribbon, which from its form, and from its greasy appearance, has evidently been used in tying the hair in one of those long queues of which sailors are so fond. Moreover, this knot is one which few besides sailors can tie, and is peculiar to the Maltese. I picked the ribbon up at the foot of the lightning-rod. It could not have belonged to either of the deceased. Now if, after all, I am wrong in my induction from this ribbon, that the Frenchman was a sailor belonging to a Maltese vessel, still I can have done no harm in saying what I did in the advertisement. If I am in error, he will merely suppose that I have been misled by some circumstance into which he will not take the trouble to inquire. But if I am right, a great point is gained. Cognizant although innocent of the murder, the Frenchman will naturally hesitate about replying to the advertisement --about demanding the Ourang-Outang. He will reason thus: --'I am innocent; I am poor; my Ourang-Outang is of great value --to one in my circumstances a fortune of itself --why should I lose it through idle apprehensions of danger? Here it is, within my grasp. It was found in the Bois de Boulogne --at a vast distance from the scene of that butchery. How can it ever be suspected that a brute beast should have done the deed? The police are at fault --they have failed to procure the slightest clew. Should they even trace the animal, it would be impossible to prove me cognizant of the murder, or to implicate me in guilt on account of that cognizance. Above all, I am known. The advertiser designates me as the possessor of the beast. I am not sure to what limit his knowledge may extend. Should I avoid claiming a property of so great value, which it is known that I possess, I will render the animal, at least, liable to suspicion. It is not my policy to attract attention either to myself or to the beast. I will answer the advertisement, get the Ourang-Outang, and keep it close until this matter has blown over.

At this moment we heard a step upon the stairs.

"Be ready," said Dupin, "with your pistols, but neither use them nor show them until at a signal from myself."

The front door of the house had been left open, and the visitor had entered, without ringing, and advanced several steps upon the staircase. Now, however, he seemed to hesitate. Presently we heard him descending. Dupin was moving quickly to the door, when we again heard him coming up. He did not turn back a second time, but stepped up with decision and rapped at the door of our chamber.

"Come in," said Dupin, in a cheerful and hearty tone.

A man entered. He was a sailor, evidently, --a tall, stout, and muscular-looking person, with a certain dare-devil expression of countenance, not altogether unprepossessing. His face, greatly sunburnt, was more than half hidden by whisker and mustachio. He had with him a huge oaken cudgel, but appeared to be otherwise unarmed. He bowed awkwardly, and bade us "good evening," in French accents, which, although somewhat Neufchatelish, were still sufficiently indicative of a Parisian origin.

Sit down, my friend," said Dupin. "I suppose you have called about the Ourang-Outang. Upon my word, I almost envy you the possession of him; a remarkably fine, and no doubt a very valuable animal. How old do you suppose him to be?"

The sailor drew a long breath, with the air of a man relieved of some intolerable burden, and then replied, in an assured tone:

"I have no way of telling --but he can't be more than four or five years old. Have you got him here?"

"Oh no; we had no conveniences for keeping him here. He is at a livery stable in the Rue Dubourg, just by. You can get him in the morning. Of course you are prepared to identify the property?"

"To be sure I am, sir."

"I shall be sorry to part with him," said Dupin.

"I don't mean that you should be at all this trouble for nothing, sir," said the man. "Couldn't expect it. Am very willing to pay a reward for the finding of the animal --that is to say, any thing in reason."

"Well," replied my friend, "that is all very fair, to be sure. Let me think! --what should I have? Oh! I will tell you. My reward shall be this. You shall give me all the information in your power about these murders in the Rue Morgue."

Dupin said the last words in a very low tone, and very quietly. Just as quietly, too, he walked toward the door, locked it, and put the key in his pocket. He then drew a pistol from his bosom and placed it, without the least flurry, upon the table.

The sailor's face flushed up as if he were struggling with suffocation. He started to his feet and grasped his cudgel; but the next moment he fell back into his seat, trembling violently, and with the countenance of death itself. He spoke not a word. I pitied him from the bottom of my heart.

"My friend," said Dupin, in a kind tone, "you are alarming yourself unnecessarily --you are indeed. We mean you no harm whatever. I pledge you the honor of a gentleman, and of a Frenchman, that we intend you no injury. I perfectly well know that you are innocent of the atrocities in the Rue Morgue. It will not do, however, to deny that you are in some measure implicated in them. From what I have already said, you must know that I have had means of information about this matter --means of which you could never have dreamed. Now the thing stands thus. You have done nothing which you could have avoided --nothing, certainly, which renders you culpable. You were not even guilty of robbery, when you might have robbed with impunity. You have nothing to conceal. You have no reason for concealment. On the other hand, you are bound by every principle of honor to confess all you know. An innocent man is now imprisoned, charged with that crime of which you can point out the perpetrator."

The sailor had recovered his presence of mind, in a great measure, while Dupin uttered these words; but his original boldness of bearing was all gone.

"So help me God," said he, after a brief pause, "I will tell you all I know about this affair; --but I do not expect you to believe one half I say --I would be a fool indeed if I did. Still, I am innocent, and I will make a clean breast if I die for it."

What he stated was, in substance, this. He had lately made a voyage to the Indian Archipelago. A party, of which he formed one, landed at Borneo, and passed into the interior on an excursion of pleasure. Himself and a companion had captured the Ourang-Outang. This companion dying, the animal fell into his own exclusive possession. After great trouble, occasioned by the intractable ferocity of his captive during the home voyage, he at length succeeded in lodging it safely at his own residence in Paris, where, not to attract toward himself the unpleasant curiosity of his neighbors, he kept it carefully secluded, until such time as it should recover from a wound in the foot, received from a splinter on board ship. His ultimate design was to sell it. Returning home from some sailors' frolic on the night, or rather in the morning of the murder, he found the beast occupying his own bed-room, into which it had broken from a closet adjoining, where it had been, as was thought, securely confined. Razor in hand, and fully lathered, it was sitting before a looking-glass, attempting the operation of shaving, in which it had no doubt previously watched its master through the key-hole of the closet. Terrified at the sight of so dangerous a weapon in the possession of an animal so ferocious, and so well able to use it, the man, for some moments, was at a loss what to do. He had been accustomed, however, to quiet the creature, even in its fiercest moods, by the use of a whip, and to this he now resorted. Upon sight of it, the Ourang-Outang sprang at once through the door of the chamber, down the stairs, and thence, through a window, unfortunately open, into the street.

The Frenchman followed in despair; the ape, razor still in hand, occasionally stopping to look back and gesticulate at its pursuer, until the latter had nearly come up with it. It then again made off. In this manner the chase continued for a long time. The streets were profoundly quiet, as it was nearly three o'clock in the morning. In passing down an alley in the rear of the Rue Morgue, the fugitive's attention was arrested by a light gleaming from the open window of Madame L'Espanaye's chamber, in the fourth story of her house. Rushing to the building, it perceived the lightning-rod, clambered up with inconceivable agility, grasped the shutter, which was thrown fully back against the wall, and, by its means, swung itself directly upon the headboard of the bed. The whole feat did not occupy a minute. The shutter was kicked open again by the Ourang-Outang as it entered the room.

The sailor, in the meantime, was both rejoiced and perplexed. He had strong hopes of now recapturing the brute, as it could scarcely escape from the trap into which it had ventured, except by the rod, where it might be intercepted as it came down. On the other hand, there was much cause for anxiety as to what it might do in the house. This latter reflection urged the man still to follow the fugitive. A lightning-rod is ascended without difficulty, especially by a sailor; but, when he had arrived as high as the window, which lay far to his left, his career was stopped; the most that he could accomplish was to reach over so as to obtain a glimpse of the interior of the room. At this glimpse he nearly fell from his hold through excess of horror. Now it was that those hideous shrieks arose upon the night, which had startled from slumber the inmates of the Rue Morgue. Madame L'Espanaye and her daughter, habited in their night clothes, had apparently been arranging some papers in the iron chest already mentioned, which had been wheeled into the middle of the room. It was open, and its contents lay beside it on the floor. The victims must have been sitting with their backs toward the window; and, from the time elapsing between the ingress of the beast and the screams, it seems probable that it was not immediately perceived. The flapping-to of the shutter would naturally have been attributed to the wind.

As the sailor looked in, the gigantic animal had seized Madame L'Espanaye by the hair, (which was loose, as she had been combing it,) and was flourishing the razor about her face, in imitation of the motions of a barber. The daughter lay prostrate and motionless; she had swooned. The screams and struggles of the old lady (during which the hair was torn from her head) had the effect of changing the probably pacific purposes of the Ourang-Outang into those of wrath. With one determined sweep of its muscular arm it nearly severed her head from her body. The sight of blood inflamed its anger into phrenzy. Gnashing its teeth, and flashing fire from its eves, it flew upon the body of the girl, and imbedded its fearful talons in her throat, retaining its grasp until she expired. Its wandering and wild glances fell at this moment upon the head of the bed, over which the face of its master, rigid with horror, was just discernible. The fury of the beast, who no doubt bore still in mind the dreaded whip, was instantly converted into fear. Conscious of having deserved punishment, it seemed desirous of concealing its bloody deeds, and skipped about the chamber in an agony of nervous agitation; throwing down and breaking the furniture as it moved, and dragging the bed from the bedstead. In conclusion, it seized first the corpse of the daughter, and thrust it up the chimney, as it was found; then that of the old lady, which it immediately hurled through the window headlong.

As the ape approached the casement with its mutilated burden, the sailor shrank aghast to the rod, and, rather gliding than clambering down it, hurried at once home --dreading the consequences of the butchery, and gladly abandoning, in his terror, all solicitude about the fate of the Ourang-Outang. The words heard by the party upon the staircase were the Frenchman's exclamations of horror and affright, commingled with the fiendish jabberings of the brute.

I have scarcely anything to add. The Ourang-Outang must have escaped from the chamber, by the rod, just before the breaking of the door. It must have closed the window as it passed through it. It was subsequently caught by the owner himself, who obtained for it a very large sum at the Jardin des Plantes. Le Bon was instantly released, upon our narration of the circumstances (with some comments from Dupin) at the bureau of the Prefect of Police. This functionary, however well disposed to my friend, could not altogether conceal his chagrin at the turn which affairs had taken, and was fain to indulge in a sarcasm or two, about the propriety of every person minding his own business.

"Let them talk," said Dupin, who had not thought it necessary to reply. "Let him discourse; it will ease his conscience. I am satisfied with having defeated him in his own castle. Nevertheless, that he failed in the solution of this mystery, is by no means that matter for wonder which he supposes it; for, in truth, our friend the Prefect is somewhat too cunning to be profound. In his wisdom is no stamen. It is all head and no body, like the pictures of the Goddess Laverna, --or, at best, all head and shoulders, like a codfish. But he is a good creature after all. I like him especially for one master stroke of cant, by which he has attained his reputation for ingenuity. I mean the way he has 'de nier ce qui est, et d'expliquer ce qui n'est pas.'"

[thesinglesjukebox]

HAIM - SUMMER GIRL

[7.92]

We think it’s fly when these girls stop by for the summer...

Nellie Gayle: I'm not exactly the least biased observer when it comes to Haim's music. I owe a good portion of my close friendships and my longterm relationship to the Twitter fandom they cultivated around the time of their first release, when I was a tiny baby in college. But, still, I think my respect and affection for them doesn't disqualify me from having a valuable opinion on them. In this case, I can especially appreciate "Summer Girl" as the rare Haim song celebrating longevity and long distance in all of its pangs and nuanced happy moments. Written for Danielle Haim's partner during a serious illness, Summer Girl is a painfully sweet momento of that moment when we realize exactly what we are to other people and walk toward that version of ourselves. There's an easy breezy quality to the song that's underpinned by the fear and trauma that can visit a relationship. To be a summer girl, here, is less about wilding out for yourself in global warming record highs (still an admirable pastime), and more about how we can find strength by viewing our own selves -- malleable, fragile, messy -- as the strength and release someone else needs. This shift in perspective creates love for both ourselves, and the vessels of care and affection in our lives *collective 'awwwww'* [10]

Joshua Minsoo Kim: Lou Reed knew how to make these sparse, simple songs that felt content with life despite knowing its many shortcomings. "Summer Girl" feels imbued with that same gritty hope, not least because its "Walk on the Wild Side" influence is patently obvious. The backstory of this song -- that it was written for Danielle Haim's partner Ariel Rechtshaid after he was diagnosed with testicular cancer -- makes this feel all the more heartfelt. But really, it's there in the music itself. This is the sort of song that feels like the product of a jam session between friends, where repetition and marginal changes in dynamics are a reflection of lazy summer days and a desire to just do something with the people you care about. Danielle Haim grounds the song with her vocals, but it's the music -- ever-loping and easy-going -- that signals the message here that everything will be all right. I'm reminded of Pavement's "Gold Soundz," specifically the notion of a mutual emptiness. What Malkmus spoke of was a romanticized ennui, but any emptiness I sense here is of a different sort: a willingness to empty oneself completely, to be filled with nothing but the love of another. [7]

Katie Gill: Thankfully, the four minute long showcase for a saxophone riff features a REALLY GOOD saxophone riff. [6]

Michael Hong: Haim may have described "Summer Girl" as an attempt to emulate "Walk on the Wild Side" by Lou Reed, but its aesthetics also seemed to be partially informed by Danielle's recent stints across Vampire Weekend's Father of the Bride, especially, the jazzy-vibes of "Sunflower" and "Flower Moon." And similar to Vampire Weekend, Haim have a strength for distilling decades of influences to make their music sound simply like the present. On the surface, "Summer Girl" sounds exactly like a summer breeze, but it's deceptively chill. The burden of forced positivity leads to a sadness and the feeling that the group is holding back that creep into the track's breezy atmosphere. That sadness and restraint should be worrying; however, Danielle's reassuring vocals flip any anxiety into peace, and everything else disappears in the meditative way she repeats the line "I'm your summer girl." [7]

Ashley Bardhan: I love how soft Danielle's vocals are and how the saxophone peeks out from behind it, like the twinkling of an ice cream truck on a sticky July night. I feel the heavy summer breeze passing when she says "You walk beside me, not behind me/Feel my unconditional love." It's a whispered command breaking into love and heat, opening the grey clouds to see the "angels coming now." As the song ends, amidst steely drums and saxophone swelling, you reached the beach in your favorite town. [8]

Wayne Weizhen Zhang: Songs about summer love take place at the beach, on bright sunny days, end at parties; they are flirtatious, playful, even dangerous; they sound like the rush of falling in love at an irresponsible pace, but being too young and dumb to give a care about the eventual season's change. To be sure, these songs are great, but "Summer Girl" is so arresting and gorgeous precisely because of its subversion of this formula. It begins after the thrill of the chase has already subsided, and focuses instead on the emotional intimacy and complexity that percolates afterwards. When Haim whisper, "I can see it in your face/I'm relief/I'm your summer girl," it's the portrait of romance so intoxicating that pillow talk doesn't require talking at all in order to understand connection -- no matter how brief. The meandering saxophone soundtracks this all sublimely, tinged with bittersweetness as if to ruminate on the nature of love that, by definition, has an expiration date. I know I'm young and supposed to be at some club hooking up to whatever song of the summer dominates the airwaves, but this year, all I want to do is lay in an open field gazing at stars, surrounded by nothing but the sound of crickets chirping, the crackle of bonfire, and this song playing in the background as I fall asleep in a stranger's arms. [9]

Josh Buck: An unexpected and disarmingly smooth four minute swerve that makes a compelling case for Haim's longevity. [8]

Alfred Soto: A minute before the "doo-doo" hook I knew the drum pattern and sax were drenched in "Walk on the Wild Side," and it fits: Danielle Haim on a casual stroll across Hamptons dunes, cheering herself up with the musical memories competing in her head. [7]

Kayla Beardslee: An absolutely perfect summer song, "Summer Girl" would work best when played on a lazy August weekend, sitting on a screened-in porch or sprawling on a wooden dock, watching the sun slowly dip below the horizon and turn the sky pink and orange -- but I'm listening to it at a dining table on a Tuesday afternoon, and it still sounds wonderful. Danielle Haim is restrained, voice gliding smoothly over the bass with a contentment that matches the lyrics, but her emotions break through on the stellar bridge, where she describes her memories of earthquake drills and tears behind dark sunglasses. These images, which in a vacuum would seem sinister, are instead imbued with a surprising nostalgia, and the best lines in the song follow moments later. Danielle sings, "Walk beside me/Not behind me/Feel my unconditional love," and you can feel a lifetime's worth of emotions -- infatuation, frustration, longing, respect, happiness -- wrapped up in those ten seconds. And behind it all are the joyful bursts of saxophone, echoing like they're coming from just around the next street corner: the instrument, like the song as a whole, blissful, content, and yet always in motion. [8]

Jacob Sujin Kuppermann: Summer in Southern California is, perhaps counter-intuitively, a dreary time. As a kid in the vast suburbs below Los Angeles, summer was mainly characterized by the absence of things -- of the structure of the school day, of the friends you picked up (gone away to various sleepaway camps), of the will to do anything that would risk your leaving the cool darkness of your room. The weather the rest of the year was good enough to be summer, and so the season itself became a sort of filler period, a tone-setter lost in the tone. "Summer Girl" is a song that captures the feeling of an endless Southern Californian summer perfectly, its lazy backbeat and drifting saxophones rattling around in my ears until the track's disparate parts melt together. For a band that's tended towards studio perfection even in their jammiest moments (c.f. "Little of Your Love"), the move towards chill is almost disconcerting. But afternoons spent waiting out the sun deserve soundtracks as much as any of the more kinetic times of summer, and "Summer Girl" fits that bill better than anything I've heard in a while. [8]

Kylo Nocom: "Summer Girl" hearkens back to weird memories of hazy 6th grade school buses playing Kendrick Lamar on the radio and 9th grade memories of looping Radiohead by myself thinking about all of the memories I was going to make in high school. It obviously doesn't resemble the former two artists at all past any invented superficial resemblances (well, the outro does resemble "Separator" a little...) but it captures something specific that I haven't felt in a long, long time. Much of this is like one long blur of looped familiarity, but the bridge is a sweet moment of lucidity quickly whipped into yet another river of pure daydreaming music. Summer's been rough on me; it's my last summer before graduating and I'm still so confused by what I want to do. This, in all of its reassuring and affirming glory, is a pleasant reminder that I've got all the time I need. [9]

Vikram Joseph: "Summer Girl" derives much of its power from the pull and tension between the crisis of health and love that inspired the song (hinted at when they sing about "the tears behind your dark sunglasses") and their determination to present the season as an airy, carefree thing nonetheless. The minimal, pastel tones of the production are impossibly classy -- there are shades of Broken Social Scene at their most light-handed here, and a saxophone part that suspends the song a few feet off the ground, like a balloon perpetually on the verge of carrying the whole thing off into the stratosphere. [8]

[Read, comment and vote on The Singles Jukebox]

[ahmortentia]

MBTI as people i know

INFP The INFPs I know are probably the people who know the most about me? They can be judgy at times, but when they know it’s serious I trust them the most to not give me a look. Would I go to an INFP before my mother? probably. They’re really bad about eating regularly—sometimes they’ll send a text at seven pm that says “oh i forgot to eat?” Which makes me worried. They’re very sensitive to noise and surroundings, more so than other types. They tend to get really deep into something when they like it; they aren’t casual about their favorite things. They check in on people and really don’t like to burden others with their problems. At low points, they’ll wish someone would check in on them. Really good at focusing on one thing, but tends to struggle with five things at once. Negative side is that sometimes she gets so wrapped up in things/her feelings that she can’t really pay attention to her surroundings.

ISFP She’s kind of mysterious; I know bits of her past because we’ve been friends for a long time, but I wouldn’t know otherwise. She takes humor and throws it into her life; she tells great, hilarious stories, but seems too spaced out to really use that as a function. Sometimes she rambles off, almost lost in thought. She seems careful to not interrupt other people, she’s very polite. Sometimes, though, she can be really present in a conversation and it’s almost scary. We both find the same things funny; the most random words and phrases will pop into our heads and we’ll start laughing our asses off. Hufflepuff vibes, cares about other people but can be awkward in showing it. Doesn’t really know what’s going on, but is along for the ride. Never self-deprecating but never, ever arrogant. Kind.

INFJ The two INFJs I know really like mbti and I talk about it with them a lot? I don’t know if this is common within the type. The INFJ has strong moral code. Kind, cares about others. Very polite, seems to know what to say when. Has dreams and then also has an idea of how to get there; it’s not as strictly planned and straightforward, but it’s there. Somehow a soft voice (or maybe buttery?), regardless of what they’re saying. Has a good sense of the world, of how the world is; likes classifications, categories in the world. Unafraid. Negative side is that it’s hard to argue with INFJs because they have such a deeply rooted sense of self, and can take things very, very seriously.

ISFJ This is someone I’m placing here based on my semester’s observations. He loves telling stories about his life; when we talk, he’ll always be reminded of something that happened recently or even a long time ago. Gives advice in the form of a good story. Has a warmth about him, always smiles and waves. Gentle. He asks how everyone is doing, makes sure there’s a good group dynamic; will move and push things aside for people. Gives off huge Hufflepuff vibes, big suburban dad vibes. Will tell you how he feels and isn’t afraid to express his affection in words; an open book with all his life. Loves what he does and loves learning, isn’t afraid to be wrong and acknowledges when he doesn’t know. Downside is I fear people take advantage of his goodness.

INTP Gentle, but has his opinions. Stubborn as hell; likes to debate about abstract theories and things. Enjoys chasing the why. Private, takes a while to open up. Loves his planner but more for doodling and writing his thoughts than actually planning. Never sees his opinion as the way---is cautious to never assume he’s always right---but he’s right a lot of the time. It’s possible a tiny part of him knows it.  Patient, willing to let me ramble for years on end before saying his bit. It’s like he tastes his words, swishes them around in his mouth before saying them. He’s sweet.

INTJ Sees things in black and white with little to no grey areas. Sometimes corrects my jokes, which is…. Ouch. Takes things very seriously, but never seems to be driven by a passionate feeling. Loves learning, but isn’t interested in being a part of academia. A nice nerd. Makes you feel like you know him, but then he’ll tell you he has a dog and you never knew that. A really good person in the sense that he keeps to the rules and tries to do the best for everyone. Very private. Likes routine, sticks to similar outfits and the same colors. Jokes may not be laugh-out-loud like some people’s, but they’re always clever and smart. Enjoys indie music. Can be a little awkward or uncomfortable, especially if it’s a new situation. Not the best at thinking on his feet.

ISTP Always has a good time; laughs loudly with his friends. Thinks well on his feet--writes limericks and jokes on the spot as opposed to doodling. Never really plans things but is open to hanging out whenever, is laidback, doesn’t really try but manages to do well in everything. He’s somehow both put together and a total mess. Clever, witty. Can be a little bit of a showoff, apparently, but I’ve never seen that side of him. Makes a lot of self-deprecating jokes, but easily transitions into insult humor with his friends. He doesn’t really seem to change much around different people. Terrible at chess. Somewhat understanding, I think sometimes he can get stuck in his head a bit.

ISTJ I sit across from him on the couch and I ramble to him, he tells me stories in such a concise manner. He tends to focus on what people say and what really happens in the story. Rational, straightforward. He sees things more in black and white: this happened, this didn’t happen. Really good at debating and arguing things. I always lose. He’s sharp and so funny. He doesn’t mind so much making fun of people at their expense; in fact, most of his friends are the same way and they all have a good time. Unafraid to tell me when to shut the fuck up, especially when it’s needed. Clever, analytical, very good with numbers. Somewhat impatient.

ENFP I love her so much; energetic, balanced, she has a laugh that makes my heart flutter. When she finds things funny, she’s unafraid to show her feelings. She lives vigorously. She’s really funny; there’s a wit that lives in her. She goes by her feelings a lot. Knows there’s something in her gut and follows it through; gives sound advice because her gut is always, ALWAYS right. Sometimes doesn’t trust herself even though she really should. And when she goes back on herself, it turns out badly and she gets confused and insecure. Another ENFP I know is so gentle and warm, and very, very good at making and keeping connections. She’s soft, but in the best way: she loves and loves and you can feel the warmth spreading from her fingertips into the air. I worry she takes on too much; both are unskilled in the saying no department.

ESFP I used to know her relatively well as a kid, but we’ve split up since then. She’s so energetic and loud. The two words that are most apt are social butterfly: she flutters from person to person, bright and passionate, dragging everyone along to the next adventure. She can’t control her excitement--she stands up when she gets excited. She offers to drive her friends places, especially if they don’t have a car (it’s on the way or she’s got time). Popular, well-liked, always smiling. Will walk up to someone she hasn’t seen in years, or maybe someone she barely knows, and has this skill of making them feel known. Her energy, sometimes, can be too much, though.

ENFJ She feels things deeply. Looks out for everyone in a situation. Makes lots of jokes to help others feel comfortable, or to make herself feel more comfortable (usually self-deprecating jokes). Good at understanding what you say even when you speak gibberish. Bold. Talks with everyone, and is very cool. Chill. Doesn’t really change drastically in different environments; she is who she is. Smart, especially in a practical sense: also has a real gut intuition and just Knows what’s right emotionally. Decisive, trusts her feelings and sticks to them. Stands up for what she believes is right—she makes me proud to be her friend. Negative side is that sometimes she feels like the way she sees things is the only way; if something is obvious, then it should be obvious to everyone.

ESFJ Another one of my closest friends. Goes on coffee runs for people, is willing to go way out of her way to get people home safe. Knows what she wants and gets it. Is unafraid of talking to people, asking for help, or even texting people she doesn’t know. The glue of a group, consistently checks in. Well known throughout, but doesn’t strive to make her name known; it’s just who she is. Very popular, good-hearted. She enjoys calling and FaceTiming people—what more can I say about that extroversion? Spreads love and joy wherever she can. Negative side is that she can get absorbed in her feelings and sometimes she doesn’t see how she’s affecting other people with what she’s saying. 

ENTP So, so cocky. The one person I know of this type is someone I’ve placed here myself. Sharp, cutting…Biting sense of humor that makes the room come alive but never feels bitter. Tends to mock the people he likes the most. Very blunt: doesn’t dwell on the past but thinks about what he can do next. Can’t really listen for the sake of listening, he needs a purpose. Enjoys attention. Thinks well on his feet but terrible at planning; leaves things vague and doesn’t feel specifics are necessary. Tendency to make observations and translate them into analysis, but without any feeling or personal input involved. Intimidating. Maybe, maybe cares under 78 layers of doesn’t give a fuck; will never say how he feels.

ENTJ She never understands my complaints because there’s always a simple solution: just do x, y, z. She’s supportive, but not in a cheerleader way. She’s quick, good at getting things done; smart and tries hard even when she makes it seem like she doesn’t care. She sticks up for her friends and isn’t afraid to call someone out on their bullshit to their face. Uses reason and logic to get her way; great at debating and arguing, and seems to always hold herself together even when she jokes about a mental breakdown she had earlier. Has a nice laugh and always has interesting facts in her head. Knows her shit about music. She jokingly adopts a holier-than-thou attitude about some things, but everyone knows it isn’t to be taken seriously (and if you don’t know that, then you definitely aren’t friends with her). She can do impulsive things, or get dragged into impulsive things. Can think she’s always in the right and that other people are wrong.

ESTP Electric. I’ve never known her up close, so I can’t say much, but she has this energy that makes you look up when she enters a room. Knows how to have a good time. Can be a bit cutting or rude, especially to people she doesn’t know; doesn’t really care about who someone is, she has to say what she thinks is right. You primarily have to earn her respect. She’s the type who will walk up to a stranger to compliment their shirt. Enjoys being in the spotlight to the point that the spotlight naturally rests on her, it’s attached to her. Seems absolutely fearless, even though she may have doubts inside. Has taken her identity and made it into a badge of honor. Doesn’t plan things herself, but falls off that metaphorical cliff and lands in a catlike way, defying gravity. She maneuvers life having perfected improvisation.

ESTJ She, like the ISTJ, thinks so logically. But there’s something else to it: whereas the ISTJ is more independent and sticks to their own, the ESTJ wants to go-go-go. Always has a plan or an idea in her head, always wants to go out and do things, regardless of what. Loves making plans almost as much as I do. She sticks to her facts and has a tendency to forget feelings in the equation. She thinks in such a linear manner, going from A to B to C. Thorough. Bright, cheery, and loves her everyday. Negative side is that she latches onto facts and outside opinion wherever she can: instagram likes, the people who respond to her texts, her reputation according to others. She doesn’t consider how she should feel, especially internally.

[xiakha]

The Races of Hyltorea

It is said that Goblinkind all originated from the Desert of Origins after the utopia that had once existed in its center collapsed. Goblinkind have ruled the lands of Hyltorea in one way or another since the beginning of recorded history. They have conquered and been conquered many times over, often times squabbling to divvy up the land under whoever thrust themselves to the world stage and dared rule. It has never lasted long. Whatever advantage commanded the throne at the time would nevertheless prove transient, a bubble of stability in the frothing turmoil of history. They have held a common bond that the other races of Hyltorea often do not share and are more willing to work towards mutual benefit, but these alliances have seldom proven permanent. All the Great Noble Houses sort themselves into Orc, Goblin, or Hobgoblin, even if their members are not all of that race. Goblinkind can be distinguished as having an olive-greenish sheen to their skin. Their eyes are large with vertically slitted irises, their noses tend to be flat and wide, their ears come to a point, and their mouths house more or less prominent tusks and incisors. Overall, they give an impression of having somewhat felid facial characteristics.

  GOBLINS

The City-State of Mauze'fel is the only explicitly Goblin-run city-state. Its ruler, Mikhael Mauze, is a typical Swiftfinger Goblin with a chip on his shoulder. He and House Mauze alone hold the secrets to Airship technology that now churns the trade winds. It is no exaggeration to claim that he may be the most powerful man in Hyltorea.

 Small yet ungainly, Goblins look like large house cats on two feet that have a bit too much limb for their body sizes, but they still carry themselves with unnerving grace and accuracy. They rarely stretch taller than 4 feet, though their arm spans often extend further than that, and usually weigh no more than 65lb. They tend to have yellow or orange eyes. Their clothes are generally practical and they prefer simple, muted blues and yellows.

Goblins are inherently technically suited, their minds work in practical, problem solving ways to the point of exaggeration. Their lanky limbs have quick purposefulness to them and their nimble fingers are as at home working on large farming engines as on the intricate internals of a watch. Goblin Noble Houses primarily busy themselves with the husbandry of machines and technology. Their greatest tend to be scientists and knowledge seekers, searching for whatever truths may lie beyond. But all the greatest architects and artists and writers that Goblinkind has produced have also been Goblins with few exceptions. Goblins group these artists into the category of knowledge seeker, as they look for the greater truths within themselves.

However, Goblins generally do not like to bring much attention to themselves. They would rather be observers, and perhaps manipulators, in the background, keeping the machines ticking and the engines of the greater world running on time. They have never openly ruled much of the world, preferring instead to be the subtle backing or the subtle knife in the back. An Orc with a Goblin's backing can conquer much, and a Hob with a Goblin's backing often gets away with more than otherwise possible.

Goblins typically venerate Bargriv'yexh, a god of creation and design and the patron god of Goblins. Bargriv'yexh's symbol is a triangle inscribed in a square inscribed in a circle and can be found in the top left corner of all Goblin printed works. Shrines to Bargriv'yexh can be found in every Goblin firm, and temples are often simple affairs of elegant work full of prayers for inspiration and tributes that resulted from said inspiration.

Their aesthetic resembles that of Classical Islamic/Persian design, with Mongol Empire influences.

Goblins take Halfling traits and characteristics with these changes:

Ability Score Increase: Dexterity score increases by 2.

Age: A Goblin is considered an adult at the age of 16 and will generally live for just over a century. The oldest Goblins have lived to 120.

Alignment: Most Goblins have a chaotic bent, with the many projects and ideas that they pick up and drop at a moment's notice. They tend to be insular and self-centered, but they will not stand for obvious and blatant injustice.

Size: Goblins average under 4ft tall and weigh about 65lb. They are Small.

Speed: Goblins have a base walking speed of 25 feet.

Lucky: When a player playing a Goblin rolls a 1 on a d20 without advantage or disadvantage, he or she may reroll that die if they justify the reroll in roleplaying terms. If he or she does so, the second die result must be used instead. (Ex: "I'm going to try to convince the shopkeeper to give me a discount." Rolls for a persuasion check, gets a 1, goes for the reroll. "I try to flirt with the shopkeeper by saying 'What's a cute girl like you doing in a place like this?' but when he turns around, I realize he is a very male Orc and very offended." Reroll is a 14, still a failure, but not a catastrophic failure. "I say, 'Why, you're so good looking I thought you were a woman!' as a smooth recovery, and he glares at me, but doesn't kick me out of his store.")

Quickfingered: Goblins have advantage on all Dexterity based d20 checks that they can justify using only their fingers and hands for (but not arms).

Goblin Nimbleness: You can move through the space of any creature that is of a size larger than yours and any machine that is of a size two categories larger than yours.

Analytic Mind: Goblins have a knack for invention, and often specialize in a specific field. Upon creation, a Goblin character selects either Steamworks, Clockworks, or Magiworks. Goblins can intuitively understand machines of the chosen kind and have proficiency on skill checks they can justify when working with that chosen kind of machine.

Languages: Goblins can speak, read, and write Common and Goblintongue. Goblintongue is tonally very similar to Common, but is based in Dwarvish runes instead of Common Script, rendering it largely incomprehensible to those that know Dwarvish or Common. However, with a successful insight check, a Dwarvish reader or Common speaker can figure out what the Goblintongue says, and vice versa.

Subraces: There are two main kinds of Goblins, Resolute and Swiftfinger. These are not so much hard and fast subraces as ways Goblins tend to specialize.

Resolute

Resolute Goblins are the more common type of Goblin and are tougher than their size would indicate. They're the kind found clambering all over an engine or cranking and assembling contraptions onto sprockets.

Ability Score Increase: Constitution score increases by 1

Ironclad Resilience: Resolute Goblins have advantage on saving throws that involve machines if the player can justify it.

Swiftfinger

Swiftfinger Goblins are more likely to be dreamers and inventors. They often spend their days indoors at drafting tables and typewriters than in front of heavy machinery. They do difference engines, not steam engines. That isn't to say that every Goblin in the field is Resolute and every Goblin in academia is Swiftfinger.

Ability Score Increase: Intelligence or Charisma score increases by 1

Naturally Ignorable: Swiftfinger Goblins just kind of fade into the background when they're in an environment where they're expected to be. They may attempt to hide in any situation in which they're among other friendly or neutral Goblins or in any other place where they may justify being expected.

  ORCS

The City-State of Gi'am'fel has always been the seat of military power in the history of Hyltorea, and it has always been occupied by Orcish forces. The ruling party always takes the name of Gi'am, Reckoner, and Lu'i has not chosen to break from that tradition. It is by his word and sword that the other city-states wage war or peace, and, after the calamity that befell Prosperity, he is wise enough a man to be of few swords and fewer words.

 Orcs were said to have been bred and born for combat, once upon a time. That Force has been lost to the mists of times, but the results of their experimentation are clear to see. Orcs are the bulkiest of Goblinkind, even the smallest and lowest ranked individual would easily overpower a Hobgoblin of equal stature. They usually stand 6 to 7ft tall and weigh 200 to 250lb at full maturity, which they reach at age 20 to 23. Their faces resemble those of big cats with flat, low noses, though they do not have a snout like projection. Their bodies, though humanoid, are covered with light fur though some males have heavy fur on their bodies. They have pronounced cuspids, but rarely are they so overgrown that they emerge from an Orc's mouth unless they will it. Much of their clothing revolves around military garb worn with reckless casualness, in navy blues and olive greens and desert tans.  Some factions have traditions of ritualistic scarring and tattooing, others of war paint and colored livery, still others of medals and braided oaths. Whatever the case, these Orcs proudly present their House or family sworn displays at all events, formal or non-formal.

The martial prowess of Orcs should not be discounted, but despite their perceived destiny, they have found other uses for their militaristic habitudes. When they aren't at war, Orcs are builders of infrastructure. Most, if not all, roads on the face of Hyltorea were paved by Orcs, and Orcs were the first to introduce the concept of clean, running water and separate waste streams in cities. If Goblins discover, Orcs apply. From irrigation to public transport, engineering projects are often helmed by Orcs. Orc Noble Houses center around such facilities, and only three of the many houses deal directly with war. The Ruling House of Gi'am is not hereditarily resolved. Once the Head of House abdicates, whether due to age, politics, or death, challengers from all other Houses meet to test their strengths and wits in ritual combat. The victor becomes the next Head of House, and they nominate their lieutenants from competitors that they have personally defeated. So far, every Head of House has been an Orc, though many non-Orcs have vied for it.

Orcs are the shapers of the world. Their prevailing philosophy is not to observe and plan, not to convince and persuade, but to act and react. Opportunities present themselves most often when one goes to create them. They openly make themselves large and mighty, because they know that draws attention, and thus their enemies and allies alike will be forced to make themselves known. Subtlety is not beyond Orcs; they just have little chance to practice it, and only the most careful observers would recognize it.

Orcs traditionally post tribute to Gruumsh, a god of war and wisdom. Gruumsh's symbol is that of his mystical eye, a gift from his wife, Maglubiyet. Orcs salute by positioning their right hands diagonally over their right eyes, and pledge oaths by covering their right eyes, in deference to the sacrifice to wisdom that Gruumsh had made in order to win over his queen. Temples to Gruumsh are rare, but tributes to Gruumsh can be found on most public utility projects headed by Orc foremen, as the Mystic Eye is posted on all crevices that may be out of easy view.

Aesthetically, their art and design resembles that of Classical Indian design with Greco-Roman influences.

Orcs take Half-Orc traits and characteristics with these changes:

Ability Score Increase: Strength score increases by 2, and Constitution increases by 1.

Age: Orcs mature slightly slower than their cousins, only reaching maturity by ages 20 or 23, at which point they have mastered a weapon and a discipline and used both in a coming of age ritual. They live to 140 regularly, but rarely older than that.

Alignment: Orcs are generally lawful with the rigid systems that they grow up with. They trend to doing what is best for the greater good, but as it pertains to themselves.

Size: Orcs stand 6 to 7ft tall and weigh 200 to 250lb, though older Orcs will often weigh more. They are still considered Medium sized.

Speed: Orcs have a base walking speed of 30 feet.

Darkvision: Orcs excel at nighttime operations, and their work days have traditionally extended well beyond night fall. They can see 60 feet in front of them in dim lighting as if it where bright light, and they can see in total darkness as if it were dim light. However they cannot accurately discern color in complete darkness, only shades of gray, depending on the heat of their surroundings.

Menacing: Orcs don't really need to try to be intimidating. They just need to smile wide enough to reveal their large cuspids. They gain advantage on Intimidation checks as long as they're actively putting effort into being intimidating.

Weapon Familiarity: An Orc chooses and trains with a weapon from an early age. Though he or she may eventually adopt other weapons, their first weapon will always hold a special place for them. When an Orc character is created, choose a Weapon of Choice from longsword, greatclub, battle axe, rapier, warhammer, crossbow, longbow or shortbow. That character cannot get disadvantage while rolling to use a weapon of that kind, if they've used that specific weapon before in at least one previous encounter.

Public Utility Apprenticeship: The other rite of passage for an Orc is completion of an apprenticeship of a certain public works project. When an Orc character is created, choose a single public infrastructure (ie. roads, bridges, sewers, aquifers, etc.) of choice. That character gets proficiency any skill checks made with regard to that public infrastructure if it can be justified. (Ex: "With my knowledge of water mains, I try to intimidate the store owner by hinting at a possible water main break in his store unless I can check out his basement with my crew. I should get proficiency and advantage.")

Survival Instincts: The combat training Orcs undergo from a young age hones acutely their ability to not die. Whenever an Orc would be reduced to 0 hit points but not killed outright, they can choose to drop to 1 hit point instead, once per long rest.

Brutal Efficacy: Whenever an Orc scores a critical hit with a melee weapon, he or she may roll one of the weapon's damage dice one addition time and add it to the extra damage of the critical hit. If the Orc is wielding a weapon that would get the Weapon Familiarity bonus (a Weapon of Choice), instead they may re-roll one of their damage dice once, and choose a preferred result, and then, if the Weapon of Choice is melee, roll one of the weapon's damage dice one additional time and add it to the extra damage of the critical hit. (Ex: A Critical Hit with a longsword with no other bonuses is 2d6. With Brutal Efficacy, the Orc can roll an additional d6. If the Orc's Weapon of Choice is longsword, the Orc may roll one of the original dice again, taking which ever result is higher, and an additional d6.)

Languages: Orcs speak, read, and write Orcish and Common. Orcish sounds significantly different from Common, but is written in Common Script. With a successful insight roll, a Common speaker can figure out written Orcish and pronounce the words on the page without understanding what the words are.

  HOBGOBLINS

For the last eight hundred years, the Hyltorean Hobgoblin Xhaga'nate held a mighty grip on the main continent and extended its reach from the Goblin Colonies in the west to the Northern Mountains in the east. Now it is shattered, and Xhan Arth'uria sits on a broken throne in a broken empire, plotting a broken revenge.

 Hobgoblins are the middle race, not as tall and bulky and Orcs, but not as lanky and small as Goblins. They stand roughly 5ft to just under 6ft and weigh from 110lb to 180lb. They have cat-like ears on their head and their limbs are furred to match. They tend to wear intricate layered outfits, and formal garb almost always consists of a loose cloak or tunic draped over a double breasted tailor-fitted inner layer.

Hobgoblins value community and diplomacy over everything else and their lives are steeped in tradition. Legends tell of a world united in harmony under a Goblinkind flag, and much of Hobgoblin cultural identity revolves around recapturing this lost era, or any of the many that came after it. The last Xhaga'nate was the most recent and most successful attempt to bottle lightning. Almost every Hobgoblin has a plan or an opinion about how to best rebuild their empires, and most do what they can to advance that agenda. The Hobgoblin Houses not dedicated to diplomacy and management usually involve understanding and interpreting history and tradition. Indeed, one could say that Hobgoblins are the most traditionally founded of Goblinkind. That's not to say that they are less forward thinking than their Orcish or Goblin compatriots, as Hobgoblins use their understanding of the past and tradition to inform their decisions and spur on the movements they helm with unerring confidence.

Hobgoblins thus are all about connections, compromise, networking, and bridge building. This often manifests itself as persuading others to take the course of action that is most optimized for the Hobgoblin. That doesn't mean all Hobgoblins are master planners, they're just convincing and good at cultivating ideas. Few operate that well outside the short term. If Goblins are all about subtle workings and Orcs are about the obvious or ostentatious, Hobgoblins draw a happy medium between the two extremes, as they are oft to do.

All Hobgoblins have at some point in their lives prayed to Maglubiyet, goddess of ambition and cunning. Her symbol is her Iron Throne, and every one of her many temples has this uncomfortable device at its centerpiece. People come to worship the Patron Goddess of Hobgoblins in pairs or groups, never alone. Almost all rites and prayers require at least another to join in, whether it be in chorus, response, or round. Outside of her temples, Maglubiyet and her symbols rarely appear save in the morality stories taught to children.

Aesthetically, Hobgoblins use an interplay of Mongol Empire and Greco-Roman design.

Hobgoblins take Half-Elf traits and characteristics with these changes:

Ability Score Increase: Charisma increases by 2, and two other ability scores of choice increase by 1.

Age: Hobgoblins come of age in mass ceremonies at 18. Most live about 150 years, but there are claims that some have lived to see their second century.

Alignment: Hobgoblins come in all stripes, and do not necessarily veer more lawfully or chaotically, though individuals will obviously have explicit preferences.

Size: Hobgoblins are 5 to 6 feet tall and weigh 110 to 180lb. They are Medium sized.

Speed: Hobgoblins have a base walking speed of 30 feet.

Darkvision: Hobgoblins retain this throwback to some ancient time, and Hobgoblins that live in the city generally only find use of this trait in the unlit Temples of Maglubiyet, as it is believed the darkness improves one's spiritual connections. They can see 60 feet in front of them in dim lighting as if it were bright light, and they can see in total darkness as if it were dim light. However they cannot accurately discern color in complete darkness, only shades of gray, depending on the heat of their surroundings.

City-State Heritage: All Hobgoblins know more than they realize about the places that they grew up in. Choose one of the marked geopolitical points of interest on the Hyltorea world map west of (and including) Prosperity and south of the northern reaches of the Spine of Hyltorea as a region of origin. Hobgoblins have advantage on all skill checks made with reference to that region of origin if it can be justified.

Skill Versatility: Hobgoblins have proficiency in two skills of their choice. Hobgoblins that hail from a city-state choose an additional proficiency in a skill that uses Intelligence checks or Charisma checks. Hobgoblins that hail from a non-city-state choose an additional proficiency that uses Wisdom checks or Charisma checks.

Languages: Hobgoblins speak, read, and write Common primarily, Goblin or Orc as a secondary. City-state based Hobgoblins tend to learn Elvish as a third language, and non-city-state based Hobgoblins tend to learn Dwarvish. Common tongue is also known as Hobtongue or Hoblish.

  ELVES

The Moon Elves and Sun Elves have always danced in complementary cycles, even before their gods united as one being. The uneasy truce they brokered in their many wars was planted in trees, and the lofty tops were used as a neutral ground, forcing the Elves to rise up, metaphorically and physically. The pale Moon Elves have been hunters and sailors since antiquity, living nomadic lives in the frozen north. The god they worshipped, Corellon, was a mighty hunter and trickster who could disappear with a twist. His traveling cloak was the Moon. The tanned Sun Elves have always been planters and herders, and settled in the rich fields of what is now the Xham'bel Fielfdom and Luran Forests. Their goddess, Larethian, is primarily seen as a nurturing mother too beautiful and vindictive to look at directly, liable to kill with the very power that feeds. Her chariot was the Sun. As the myth goes, the romance that never could be was struck and consummated when Corellon used his traveling cloak to disappear not just himself, but Larethian's chariot entirely. And from that unity emerged a new being, Corellon Larethian, a deity of dualities, both Sun and Moon, both male and female, both life and death. They have remained this way ever since, traveling in the Chariot of the Sun by day, and the Cloak of the Moon by night.

Luran Forest was planted, nurtured, and filled with all manners of beasts as a symbol of this new unison, and was one of the first places Moon and Sun Elves intermingled. Within the treetops, the city is symbiotic structures woven out of the living branches of the canopy. The Elven retreat from Luran Forest and the Xham'bel plains eastwards lead to the Unification of Sylvanian tribes, a response to the increasing grasp and power of Xhan'fel. But even Unified Sylvania eventually signed away power to the Hobgoblin Empire in treaties that have since been negated and neglected as Xhan'fel no longer has any ability to enforce them. In Unified Sylvania, years of intermarriage between Moon and Sun Elves have lead to progeny that claim themselves "Dawn Elves."

Moon Elves take aesthetic cues from Norse and Mesoamerican designs.

Sun Elves take aesthetic cues from Egyptian and Mesoamerican designs.

Dawn Elves are largely super organic Art Nouveau.

Elves retain the same stats except as follows:

Ability Score Increase: Dexterity increases by 2.

Age: Elves reach physical maturity slightly later than Hobgoblins, at about 25, but most Elves are not treated as full adults until they reach 75 years of age, because of cultural traditions and the experiences they have to master. Elves age slowly after that and do not seem to age after 150 years of life. Arguably, an Elf could potentially live forever, and the oldest Elves are record to be over a thousand, but most die long before then.

Alignment: Sun Elves tend to be a bit more settled in their ways, and Moon Elves are continuously in flux. Thus in general, Elves tend to be neither overly chaotic nor lawful on average, but individuals may vary wildly, especially among citizens of Sylvania.

Size: Elves are 5 to nearly 6 feet tall and are slender to skinny looking. Their size is Medium.

Speed: Elves have a base walking speed of 30 feet.

Darkvision: Elves see in the dark, potentially because everyone else can see in the dark too. They can see 60 feet in front of them in dim lighting as if it were bright light, and they can see in total darkness as if it were dim light. However they cannot accurately discern color in complete darkness, only shades of gray, depending on the heat of their surroundings.

Keen Senses: Elves have proficiency in the Perception skill.

Trance: Elves don't technically need to sleep. Most adult Elves do not, choosing to meditate or "Trance" instead for four hours a night. This comes easily to Dawn Elves, and even children grasp this naturally. Sun and Moon Elves need to train to do this, and some Elves just never learn how.

Elvish Knowledge: Elves that are considered adults have proficiency in Intelligence checks when dealing with Elvish history, tradition, religion, or artifacts.

 Subraces:

Dawn Elves

Hailing from Unified Sylvania, Dawn Elves have a certain mystical quality to them. It might be magic. Their skin tones tend to fall in the average between the warm, saturated tones of the Sun Elves and the cold, desaturated tones of Moon Elves, though some are as tanned or as pale as their ancestors. Their somewhat unearthly eyes tend to be silver-blue, purple, yellow-green, or red. Likewise, their hair tends to venture into the "unnatural" ranges of purples, bright reds, greens, and blues.

Ability Score Increase: Intelligence increases by 1.

Fey Ancestry: It is said that the union between Corellon and Larethian and their children was blessed by the Fey. At least, that's what Dawn Elves claim their natural resistance to charm and sleep is. They have advantage on saving throws against being charmed and magic can't put them to sleep.

Elf Weapon Training: Dawn Elves have proficiency in two of the following: rapiers, shortsword, shortbow, and longbow. Adult Dawn Elves have proficiency in all four.

Elvish Diplomacy: Dawn Elves have proficiency in Charisma checks when dealing with other Elves.

Cantrip: Dawn Elves can cast one cantrip of choice from the wizard spell list. They use Intelligence for spellcasting ability.

Languages: Apart from Elvish and Common, many Dawn Elves also pick up at least a smattering of Sylvan. Dawn Elves of at least 75 years of age are usually fully fluent in Sylvan, and most also pick up a fourth language.

 Moon Elves

Moon Elves come from the icy north and have spent most of their time raiding the coasts and following the herds of dire caribou and dire buffalo as they migrate up and around the spine of Hyltorea. This activity brought them in contact with both Sun Elves and Goblinkind, often in less-than-civil engagements. They have colder, less saturated skintones that reflect their environment with eyes and hair to match, though red hair and eyes may appear in fiery defiance of the hoar frost.

Ability Score Increase: Constitution increases by 1.

Frozen Heritage: Moon Elves have resistance to cold damage and have proficiency on Wisdom checks related to cold or oceanic environs or hunting prey in those environs if the link can be justified.

Elf Weapon Training: Moon Elves have proficiency in two of the following: shortsword, trident, shortbow, longbow. Adult Moon Elves have proficiency in all four.

Elvish Diplomacy: Moon Elves have proficiency in Charisma checks when dealing with other Moon Elves and Dawn Elves.

Light of Foot: Moon Elves have a base walking speed of 35. When a Moon Elf passes through snow and ice or similar difficult terrain, they may attempt a Dexterity check to pass through the difficult terrain without trace. Whether or not they succeed, they still take no penalty to movement speed, and they can move at a steady pace without slowing while working through the terrain. They may do the same with rocking surfaces.

Languages: Moon Elves learn Elvish, Moon dialect, and Common. When learning other languages, they often pick up either Sun dialect Elvish, or Goblin. Elvish speakers can intuit what is said in Moon dialect Elvish with a successful Insight check.

 Sun Elves

Sun Elves are native to the hot and flat plains of the south, and have long lived a pastoral life based on grains and herd animals. They are more friendly and amendable to Goblinkind, as they have been in constant contact and trade since time immemorial. They have a warmer, more saturated complexions, eyes, and hair. Every so often, there's one with white to blonde hair and light eyes, but they are rare.

Ability Score Increase: Wisdom increases by 1.

Pastoral Charm: Whenever a Sun Elf is in a position to talk about their culture or spin a yarn about their life on the plains, they gain advantage on all justifiable Charisma checks. They also have proficiency for Wisdom (Animal Handling) checks and Wisdom (Survival) checks when in prairie.

Elf Weapon Training: Sun Elves have proficiency in two of the following: longsword, shortsword, longbow, shortbow. Adult Sun Elves have proficiency in all four.

Elvish Diplomacy: Sun Elves have proficiency in Charisma checks when dealing with other Sun Elves and Dawn Elves.

Cantrip: Sun Elves can cast one cantrip of choice from the druid spell list. They use Wisdom for spellcasting ability.

Languages: Sun Elves learn Elvish, Sun dialect, and Common. When learning other languages, they often pick up either Moon dialect Elvish, Goblin, or Orc. Elvish speakers can intuit what is said in Sun dialect Elvish with a successful Insight check.

  DWARVES

Dwarves believe their race was cast from iron and hammered into shape by Moradin, a sentient Godhammer. Before the metal cooled, the detail work was done by Moradin's spouse, Kalavin, a sentient Godsickle. Together, they raised the Dwarvish race from the depths of the earth to the favorable place underground they find themselves now. But it has taken much hard work and sacrifice to reach the position that they are currently at, and Dwarves know better than anyone else that a community often must move with conviction and coherency.

Underground, the Dwarves are super utilitarian and put the needs of the community before their own. Dwarves traditionally mask themselves literally to honor the agreement they made with Moradin to metaphorically treat all other Dwarves as the same, that no Dwarf is below or above any other in the dark. They wear their beards long and braided, one braid for every bond, pact, and allegiance that they have.  All receive what they require and all give what they can. Any Dwarf putting self before others is stripped of her beard and removed from society, left to wander the Underdark eternally, or until they reach the surface.

Above ground, then, are the Dwarves that were ejected from that perfect state and their descendants. Some still wear masks and braids in keeping with Moradin's ways. Others have turned to Kalavin, expressing and emphasizing the details the Godsickle granted them. Most farm or herd, and the ones in the mountains mine. They have taken to recreational use of explosives in very small quantities, high boots, and outsized floppy hats.

Yes, Dwarvish vaquero.

Above ground Dwarvish aesthetic take cues from Chinese design with Wild West influences.

Dwarves have the same stats as stated in the Player's Handbook with these additions:

Tool Proficiency: Dwarves gain proficiency with one of these artisan's tools: smith's tools, gunsmith's tools, brewer's supplies, mason's tools, or leatherworker's tools.

Persuasive Professionalism: Dwarves gain advantage on all Charisma checks when discussing the trade they work in or subject matter related to the trade they work in.

Blend In: A masked Dwarf can attempt to hide in a group of other masked Dwarves even without anything else obscuring her. In an area with ten or more other masked Dwarves, a masked Dwarf has advantage on this hide check.

Languages: Dwarvish is written in pictographs that have been formalized and standardized as runes.

  GNOMES

Gnomes primarily hail from the southeastern islands, and most can trace roots back to Gnometown. Little is known about their origins, save that they seem to be oddly in sync with the Fey, which tolerate their presence better than any other race. Are they Fey that lost their access to the Feywilds? Are they reject-Dwarves from Moradin's first casting? Are they the result of forbidden Elvish experimentation? Are they counterparts to Goblins? Who knows. The fact remains that they have tunnels everywhere in their cities, they tunneled into the mainland, and they are intensely curious.

Gnomes take the same stats as stated in the Player's Handbook with these additions:

Sylvan Connections: Gnomes have advantage on all Charisma checks relating directly to the Fey.

Gnome Connections: Gnomes always know a guy, and with an Intelligence check, can always figure out how to reach that guy, even if that guy is trying very hard not to be reached.

ANIBORN

The Aniborn are humanoids with animalistic traits, as would suit those of the Anima lineage. In that respect, they have even more variation to how they look, and some even have ears resembling those of an animal that extend past the tops of their heads and antlers they may grow and shed like deer. These traits are usually rather benign and do not change their silhouette dramatically. Wings grown are generally small and useless, hands still include thumbs, digitigrade feet still allow for typical bipedal locomotion, tails are nuisances and not prehensile, faces do not get snouts, and for the most part, the Aniborn are only as hirsute as the other mortal races. There are some exceptions, but those are rare and often live as hermits, shut away from even other Aniborn. They have an affinity for nature like the Anima they resemble, and have natural magical ability like the Fey. Though they most likely have origins in the Great Spirits that sunk into the earth, they readily interbreed with most other mortal races; however, their offspring are never hybrid.

Aniborn generally live in villages on their own, near Fey conclaves, and rarely interact with the other mortal races. When they do, they often come across as cunning and charismatic, in an uncanny manner. As they generally have a good relationship with their Anima brethren, it isn’t unheard of Aniborn living among the Fey and Anima themselves, serving as liasons between the more animalistic of the Anima and mortals. Some even work with the Unseelie. However this disconnect with modern society and a lack of social graces in comparison to their suave Lumi cousins, has given the Aniborn a somewhat undeserved reputation for being awkward and naive. City Aniborn do not lack these graces but the reputation still precedes them, much to their chagrin.

The Aniborn use stats for Tieflings. DM fiat for changes to resistances and Infernal Legacy replacement spells

LUMI

The Lumi clearly have some kind of elemental matter running through their veins. They may have hair of a mottled brown, a fiery red, a wispy blonde, or even no hair at all. Their skin likewise range from a coppery tan to an ethereal pale. Their eyes are invariably an unearthly yellow or purple. In general, most Lumi take form very similar to that of very large Luminal influenced Fey, so oddly they resemble Elves more often than not. Their variability means that short Lumi may only be slightly taller than Dwarves and tall Lumi tower over Hobgoblins. They also have some aspect of control over the elements they resemble, and it is not unheard of Lumi without magical training unleashing gouts of flame or sparks or controlling boulders or ponds. As Luminal are generally incompatible with the usual methods of mortal reproduction, it is often said that the original Lumi were creations by the Great Spirits that ascended to the skies, potentially by fusing Luminal with mortals.

The Luminal in them give the Lumi strength and a dazzle that other mortal races find oddly compelling. As they have no homeland and their Luminal “brethren” are generally wary of them, they instead integrate themselves among the other moral races, and it is not odd to find them working closely with Hobgoblins or Elves. Though they may take lovers of different races, the Luminal have difficulty conceiving even among themselves (half-Elf half-Lumi are basically unheard of), making Lumi society rare. Only in the Luminal city-state of Xhor'Ruvula is there a significant Lumi population, and even that, subservient to the Luminal that rule the city-state, could hardly be called a thriving society of its own right.

The Lumi use stats for Dragonborn. DM fiat for breath weapon replacement and other details.

[emeraldwaves]

Title: A Sweet Break For @spiral-desuladesu! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! <33 I LOVE YOU!!! & Thank you @lainaraquel for betaing <3

Pairing: Teshima/Aoyagi (T2) Rating: G WC: 2,394

AO3

Summary:

Teshima pushes himself, and Aoyagi knows he needs a break.

Aoyagi could always tell when Teshima was stressed. It was an easy thing to notice, since Aoyagi was always the observer, and he admittedly spent most of his time observing Teshima specifically. He noticed the tension in his body in class, the way he was hunching his back over the desk, staring at the paper in front of him. Sometimes he'd tap a pencil against his lips, looking pensive, lost in thought, and Aoyagi knew he was concerned about the team.

He'd been appointed captain, and Aoyagi couldn't imagine anyone better for the position. Teshima was organized, calculated, and he worked harder than anyone Aoyagi had ever encountered. The worst part of it all, was Teshima couldn't seem to see these things about himself; he only viewed himself as average. This, in turn, often made Teshima overwork himself, and Aoyagi had definitely noticed.

It wasn't that he didn't understand where it was coming from. The two of them were most likely going to be participating in the inter-high, something they'd wanted to achieve for the past two years. On top of that, they'd be doing it without Tadokoro, who had always been a vital part of their training and improvement. Plus, they had the weight from last year bearing down on their shoulders. They were the number one team now, and everyone wanted to keep their position. Sohoku had to stay on top.

And though Onoda carried a large amount of the pressure, as the new Captain, Teshima was pulling some of the pressure himself.

It was the worst at practice. Teshima's riding was far more intense than normal. Riding next to him, Aoyagi could feel how hard Teshima was pushing himself. Sweat dripped down his brow, his wavy hair looking damp as it blew in the wind. He wasn't talking much either, mostly looking ahead. It was Aoyagi who pushed to keep up with him.

"Junta," he panted. "Don't overdo it."

Teshima turned to look at Aoyagi, the first time during this particular practice. Normally, he was constantly checking in with the occasional glance here and there, but Teshima had kept his eyes facing forward the entire time they had ridden together today.

"Overdo it?" Teshima choked out, his breathing labored.

Aoyagi nodded.

Teshima smiled, though Aoyagi could tell it was forced, his lips twitching as he curved them upwards. "I'm fine," he chuckled. Purposefully turning his eyes back to the road, he kept his eyes hidden from Aoyagi's view. "I'm bettering myself. I have to work hard."

He was already overdoing it, Aoyagi wasn't stupid. He knew Teshima was practicing in the morning before school, and though he pretended as though he wasn't staying after practice to work for longer than the rest of them, Aoyagi knew the truth. He also knew Teshima was slowly reaching his limit. Training was good, but if he continued to overwork himself, it was possible he would burn out from exhaustion, and risk the possibility of an injury.

"Junta..." he warned, his voice low. It was his job to worry about Teshima, since Teshima never seemed to worry about himself. They were a team, and with Tadokoro gone, if he didn't look out for Teshima, no one was going to.

"You don't have anything to worry about, Hajime," Teshima spat, his voice carried some anger, and Aoyagi recoiled, surprised Teshima had spoken in such a sharp manner.

He wanted to tell him he wasn't going to improve if he kept over-striving for something. He wouldn't reach the goal he wanted if he kept pushing, pushing, pushing. But Aoyagi knew Teshima-his mind was made up, and he was going to keep doing this until he learned on his own.

Still, Aoyagi wanted to something to alleviate the stress.

"Good job everyone! We can call it here, I think everyone is working hard," Teshima nodded. His eyes fell upon all of his teammates minus Aoyagi, and he knew why Teshima was avoiding his gaze. "See everyone tomorrow! We'll continue to strive for the top."

Aoyagi walked his bike past Teshima without saying a word. He of all people knew it would be impossible to force Teshima to speak of his concerns. Aoyagi wanted to help carry Teshima's burdens, not make them worse.

"Aoyagi-senpai!" Onoda's voice called out from behind him, and he stopped, turning to stare at the wide-eyed younger boy. "I-I, uh, wanted to speak to you about...Teshima-senpai," he said quietly. He glanced around nervously, obviously not wanting to be heard.

Aoyagi stared at Onoda, waiting for him to continue. He didn't wish to speak on his own concerns, knowing his ran far deeper than he could really convey with simple words.

"Right, well...he seems tired lately. I saw him practicing before school one morning, and I think he's been staying late too. D-Do you think he's working too much?" Onoda asked. "He's doing a great job as Captain, but..." Onoda trailed off, his gaze falling to the ground.

It made Aoyagi feel a little relieved. He wasn't the only one then who had noticed. He knew he had the uncanny ability to pick up on small signals Teshima gave off, but apparently Onoda had caught on too. Unsurprising. Onoda was oddly intuitive.

"Yes," Aoyagi muttered, turning away from the younger boy. "He's doing too much."

"Can...you stop him? I think you're the only one that can," Onoda said quietly. He wasn't wrong, there was no way Teshima would listen to anyone but Aoyagi, and even then it seemed he was so caught up in his own thoughts and worries...

Sighing, Aoyagi shrugged. "Maybe."

"I think you should try!" Onoda quickly bowed multiple times. "I'm sorry! I maybe am...overstepping, but he's our Captain, we need him."

"Mm," Aoyagi nodded once, agreeing something needed to be done.

Perhaps if he couldn't get Teshima to stop altogether, he could at least get him to take a break.

Walking back to the shed, he found Teshima, checking over the supplies in the club room. It was a rather obvious cover, as he waited for the others to vacate the area so he could begin to train more on his own.

"Junta. Let's go," Aoyagi said, staring him straight on.

"Eh? Go where? I'm finishing locking up the club room," he explained, glancing around the room as though he had many tasks left to complete before he could leave.

"I'll wait."

"You don't have to-"

"I want to," Aoyagi stated, still staring.

Teshima's eyes narrowed, and his shoulders sagged, knowing Aoyagi wasn't going to give this up. He was about as stubborn as Teshima was, and so he knew there was no way Aoyagi was going to back down. He sighed, shrugging. "Alright, if you really want to," he hummed.

Aoyagi nodded. He did want to. He wasn't going anywhere, and he wasn't about to let Teshima leave either.

He took a seat on the bench waiting for the other to finish his tasks, which to no surprise, did not take very long.

"Well, I'm done," Teshima said. "So, uh, let's go." His arm rubbed at the back of his neck, and he let out a small sigh. Aoyagi could tell he was frustrated, but he didn't care. Teshima needed a break, and even if Aoyagi had to force him, he was going to make him stop.

"Good," Aoyagi muttered, grabbing his bag as he began to walk out.

Another audible sigh left Teshima lips, but Aoyagi was happy when he heard the other boy's footsteps behind him.

"Hmmm, you still haven't told me where we're going," Teshima hummed. He walked next to Aoyagi casually, eyes closed, his bag slung over his shoulder.

And Aoyagi chose not to answer, walking down the hill away from the school.

Teshima sighed, "I know you're frustrated with me." Aoyagi had to resist the urge to grunt angrily in response. Teshima did have a knack for reading Aoyagi's moods. It was only fair, he supposed, since Aoyagi could always do the same for him. "But I need you to understand," he said softer. His voice trembled, as though it were about to crack. "I have to do this. I don't have a choice."

Aoyagi's brown eyes glanced towards Teshima as the other ran his hand through his long wavy hair. Whenever he did that, Aoyagi could feel the slightest rush of blood creep onto his cheeks-it reminded him how attractive Teshima was. And even with the frustration, Aoyagi cared for, and respected Teshima more than anyone.

But he did have a choice, and he was choosing to be far too intense. The inter-high was important, this race was important. Hell, it could potentially be their last race together (Not that Aoyagi would ever let that happen). But Teshima's sanity was also important.

He sighed, and began to walk ahead of Teshima, turning into the park a little ways down the street from their school. He looked at a bench, setting his bag down, and he pointed.

"You wanted to take me to the park?" Teshima asked, raising his eyebrow, but Aoyagi only pointed again. "Alright, alright." Teshima caved and plopped down on the bench, waiting.

Grabbing his wallet, Aoyagi made his walk to a small ice cream cart, down the main path. He glanced back at Teshima. The boy had pulled out his notebook, and he was flipping through slowly, his eyes darting back and forth as he read over whatever he had jotted down in there. Probably notes about the inter-high.

Aoyagi turned away glancing back at the variety of flavors. He was going to buy Teshima an ice cream, and they were going to sit and relax, if even for a moment. Teshima normally liked vanilla ice cream, something plain, but today, after a long practice, Aoyagi had a feeling he'd prefer something a little bit more refreshing. So, instead he picked out mint chocolate chip for Teshima and strawberry for himself.

Returning to the bench, he handed Teshima the cup and took a seat next to him.

"Hajime?" Teshima blinked, glancing from one scoop to the other. "You...wanted to get ice cream?"

"A break," Aoyagi said, staring at Teshima. "Take a break."

Leaning his head back against the bench, Teshima began to laugh. He covered his eyes with his arm. "You wanted me to take a break, so you bought me an ice cream?" he leaned forward, his laugh ending on a sigh. "It was the perfect idea," he whispered, taking a small bite. "And good flavor choice. How did you know?"

Aoyagi just smiled.

"I know you're right," Teshima sighed finally. "I can't keep this up. I'm no good at this." He took a large spoonful of the ice cream and shoved it into his mouth.

"Junta. You're wrong," Aoyagi said, lowering the cup of ice cream into his lap.

"Wrong? Hajime...you know I'm not as good as most of the people on our team, and I'm the Captain It's fine if I don't race in the inter-high, but I have to continue to put in my best effort."

"You are good at this," Aoyagi muttered.

"I'm not!" he retorted quickly. "I have to work twice as hard as everyone else and-"

"No, you don't," Aoyagi said, slowly shaking his head back and forth. "You already do enough."

"I...I don't," he continued. "We have to win at the inter-high, we can't let Tadokoro-senpai and the others down. If Hakone wins... it will be my fault, for not uniting us more. I know Onoda is taking it hard too, he's putting so much pressure on himself to win again, thinking he has to. I need to set an example for everyone and that means working harder." Teshima was panting by the time he finished talking.

"I knew you felt this way," Aoyagi said, speaking the truth. He had known, he'd just wanted Teshima to say it out loud.

"I figured you did..."

Aoyagi dipped his finger into his strawberry ice cream and gently wiped it onto Teshima's cheek.

"Hajime?" he said, his cheeks turning pink. He lifted his finger and wiped off the sweet, putting his finger in his mouth to lick it off with a pop. "I guess I deserved that."

"Mhm. You deserve a break," Aoyagi said quietly. "Don't push yourself. You're doing a good job."

Teshima smiled, laughing a bit. He knew whenever Aoyagi spoke for longer than a sentence it meant he was serious about whatever he was saying. "It...doesn't feel like I am. I think about what an amazing Captain Kinjou-senpai was and...it doesn't feel like it's enough."

"Junta..." Aoyagi began. "It is enough. You are two different people. You will do things differently. And you're doing a good job. You're a good Captain. Stop overworking yourself. If you don't, you'll burn out, and then we won't have a Captain." He took a deep breath, closing his eyes, as though talking so much had worn him out.

"I know...I know you're right," Teshima sighed.

Leaning over, Aoyagi brushed his lips against Teshima's cheek. "Rely on your Vice Captain more."

Turning to him quickly, Teshima's face was bright red. Cute. Aoyagi enjoyed taking him off guard. "R-Right..." he said, swallowing.

"You're not alone."

Smiling, Teshima placed his hand over Aoyagi's, giving it a gentle squeeze. He knew. Aoyagi had always been there for him, in more ways than he could ask. "Thank you...for forcing me to do this. If you hadn't… I probably would've kept practicing. I've been staying after and coming early in the morning to... work at bettering myself."

"I know."

"Figures," Teshima chuckled. "Can't get anything by you."

"Nope."

"I'll try and cut back," Teshima groaned.

Aoyagi nodded, taking the last bite of his ice cream. Already he could tell Teshima was calmer, his shoulders seemed less tense, and the way their hands were locked together was relaxed. He much preferred Teshima this way.

"We...should do this more often. Ice cream dates in the park," Teshima smirked, giving Aoyagi a wink. He quickly turned his head, not wanting Teshima to see him blush. Though he heard Teshima laugh, and Aoyagi silently cursed himself for giving Teshima the upper hand in the end.

"Okay," he whispered anyway, squeezing his hand. If it helped Teshima relieve stress and kept him smiling, Aoyagi would've done anything.

[gotstory]

My 20 Year Old Idol Husband - Day 13 [ You Make Me Begin]

20 yr old Jungkook, at the top of his idol boyband career, has a secret only he & his bandmates know – An underground relationship, with you, a girl he met at a fanmeeting. Things get a little out of hand and you find out you’re pregnant.

Read: Day 1 / Day 2 / Day 3 / Day 4 / Day 5 / Day 6 / Day 7 / Day 8 / Day 9 / Day 10 / Day 11 / Day 12 / Day 13 /

The ride back to the dorm was a quiet one while Jungkook held your hand firmly in his.

There he was, squished in the middle of the back seat between you and Namjoon, keeping his eyes on Jimin. The pink haired boy however, was silent as he stared out of the window.

It was nearly midnight and the streets were quiet.

Finally, the taxi arrived at the basement of their dorm and Jimin thanked the driver before hooding and masking up again.

Namjoon was quick to get your carriers from the boot as Jungkook observed the surroundings, making sure there were no lurking fans. He’d usually walk around with a mask and beanie at the very most, hardly bothered by public eye. But now that things were a little different, he became more wary and protective the moment he set foot in home ground.

“You go ahead with Namjoon-hyung.” Jimin whispered to Jungkook, “I’ll take her up a little later after you guys have a word with the rest. She’s probably hungry too.”

Jungkook smiled gratefully at Jimin, awed once again that he was so reliable at every point of need.

Jimin turned to you, “let’s leave the labour to the tall guys, how does some hot chocolate sound?” It was that warmly irresistible smile you hadn’t seen in some time.

You nodded and Jungkook smiled with a sigh of relief, “don’t worry, everything’s gonna be fine. Get me a cup too okay?”

——————————————————

Jimin walked along the familiar streets to the convenience store, unsure what to say. As he walked slowly, with his hands stuffed in the pockets of his jacket, you knew he had a million questions.

“Okay. Just ask me 3 questions, I promise I’ll answer them HONESTLY no matter what they are.” You blurted out making it sound like a random game.

He looked at you under his hood, almost smiling.

“Really?” he asked.

You jumped at the opportunity to break the ice, “that’s the first question - Yes.”

Jimin laughed in disbelief, crescents forming in his eyes, “You can’t play cheat like that!”

Laughing along, you were glad that it was always easy to talk to Jimin. He was just so kind, gentle, full of considerations for others, and the kind of best friend you’d always wanted. It helped also that you were both of a similar age, that made him even more comfortable joking around with you even though you were a girl.

“Okay.” He furrowed his brows and started slowly but surely, in his rants, hands coming out of his pockets as he made all sorts of gestures.

“I know this is going to sound strange but… man! I mean… You’re a grown up, how could you have made such a huge miscalculation?! Just HOW MANY TIMES did you both… you know… to become pregnant, really? we’re of the same age but… at times like this you’re a little sister, just like Kookie.” he had an expression of pure bewilderment as he sounded more like he was talking to himself than judging you. “From the first time you passed out cold I should have known.” He laughed, looking to you.

You stopped in your tracks in all seriousness, “Jimin, there’s something you need to know. You won’t believe it but…”

Bracing yourself to let out your innermost private thoughts to Jimin, whom you now had to get used to seeing on a daily basis, you decided to confess.

“It was just ONCE. And it was my first time - and Jungkook’s too.”

Jimin jaw dropped in surprise, and he lifted his hoodie to reveal more of his rarely wide-opened eyes.

“You’re definitely kidding.”

“I’m not! And so, I’m every bit as shocked as you are. Maybe a little more since it’s happening to me.” Unintentionally, you revealed a little more of your emotional state of mind; the fear, uncertainty and some regret.

Jimin followed your steps as you started walking again . He was unsure of what to say.

He sat you down once you both reached the convenience store and grabbed a ramen for himself, a drink and a snack for you. He sat back leaning against the glass, while you swung your legs over the stool, looking out of the store and onto the street. He watched you sip the warm drink, both your hands cupping it as the temperature dipped low into the night.

“Are you scared?” he asked, eyes barely moving from slurping his ramen so it wasn’t obvious that he was trying to read your expression.

You thought about it for a moment, “I was.” You confessed, “I never expected things to turn out this way and I admit, I should have been more careful… This, really isn’t how a healthy relationship should work.” Putting away your drink, you sighed.

Jimin put down his bowl, giving you his full attention as you continued.

“Aside from the duration we’d known each other, this whole intimacy thing… happened too fast, too soon. I just wished I held it off a little more until we were able to sort out more plans for the future. Not that we can’t now but, I know it’s gonna be hard with his status.” You sighed, worried at what the next steps would be.

For the first time that night, Jimin put his arm around your shoulders. He had been keeping a distance since the airport and seemed to think the spot in front of a large glass panel was ‘safe’ enough.

“Don’t worry.” He said, echoing what Jungkook had been reassuring you daily. “Things will work themselves out. Besides, there’s more of us here and you’re never going to be alone. Coming here IS the best decision you have made and will ever make. It will be tough, but hey - we’re not Bangtan for nothing.”

Your eyes stung a little at his comforting words, you swore it was because of the preggers hormones.

“Thanks, Jimin. I can see now why they can’t do without you.”

He pulled away and ruffled your hair in a friendly way, “you’re one of US now.”

————————————-

Namjoon walked wordlessly into the dorm, lugging both Jungkook and your luggage.

The noise brought Jhope to the door, wondering why they were together. All the members had come back from their individual breaks earlier today except the youngest.

“Yah, Jeon Jungkook! I heard you didn’t go to Busan?” he questioned the youngest casually, eyeing him up at down for any trace of suspicious activity.

Taehyung at this time also emerged from the room, glad to have his game buddy back.

“Yo seagull! Time for some overwatch! ”

Jin and Suga who had been collapsed on the sofa, observed the commotion from a distance.

“Oh?” Taehyung pointed at the unfamiliar luggage, “that’s not yours.”

Namjoon kicked off his shoes and slumped his long torso onto the sofa with the 2 oldest members, fatigue overcoming his face. He hadn’t had one night of peaceful rest ever since the call.

Jungkook lay down his belongings, took off his cap, and quietly walked to the centre of the room, where he could address everyone at the same time.

“Ahh…” he rubbed a hand on the back of his neck and all eyes fixed themselves on him as he looked like he was about to say something important.

Jin sat up, frowning instinctively, knowing that something was seriously amiss. “MWOH? MWOH? MWOH?”

Taehyung scooted closer to Jhope, completely curious now.

“You guys remember Chae-rin, right?” he started off, making light eye contact with each hyung.

Jhope being most responsive as usual, was the only one who gave him an audible response. “Of course, what are you talking about, I think you’ve made us talk to her more than I talk to my mom.” Referring to the video calls he made over the last few months that were hugely featuring his members in their most normal state of life.

“Yea so, I flew over secretly, without her knowledge, to surprise her during the break.” he finally admitted.

“JINCHA?” Taehyung’s face stretched into a happy smile. “Ohhhhh, Jungkookie~!” he teased.

He continued, “but I was surprised instead.” For some reason, your face appeared in his mind and the corners of his lips picked up into a smile.

Suga was pure genius as always and had an intuition for things without needing to know too much. He leaned over to Namjoon who had his eyes shut for awhile now, whispering to him, “She came back here with him, isn’t it?”

Not bothering to open his eyes, he nodded once.

Suga smirked, satisfied with his sharp deduction.

Just then Namjoon’s leader’s instincts spoke up, while his eyes were still closed, “just tell them Jungkook, there’s no time for long story telling now.”

Jungkook chewed on his lower lip, acknowledging how the breaking of news was indeed much harder than he thought.

“So… we flew back together because I needed her to stay here, with us.”

Jhope, Jin, and Tae expressed their shock physically, either by taking a step back, or standing to their feet, and verbalising their surprise.

The youngest held out his hands in a bid to calm them.

“There’s a legit reason for it and you guys just need to chill for abit first.” He allowed them some moments to compose themselves before he spoke in a very low and hushed tone, as if he didn’t want the walls to hear.

“She’s having a baby.”

This time, it was the most unexpected hyung that made the loudest noise, causing everyone else to jump in shock.

“MWOH?!?!?!” came the voice from the ground.

Suga slid off the sofa and landed on the floor but the impact was hardly anything compared to the news from the maknae, causing him to frown intensely with a shriek.

Jin, whose eyes were widened spoke up as well, “don’t tell me… it was YOU?”

Jhope and Tae were still stunned and could only blink, watching the hyungs make sense of the situation.

The air in the room stood still at the moment, reality of the news hitting all of them at once. This wasn’t at all the kind of trouble they were used to dealing with.

Jungkook knew he had to do what he had to, and dropped to his knees.

“I’m sorry.”

Speechless, his 5 older members watched and waited to hear what else he had to say. With his eyes wide and sincere, he looked every member in the eye, pulling on every heart string he could.

“I had no other choice and there was no way I could leave her there, alone, after I found out she was going through this. I know it’s going to be very inconvenient but at this point in time, this is the best solution.”

He let out a soft sigh, “I’m really sorry to break the news this way but I can’t give up either of the 2 things.” Referring to BTS, which was pretty much his all, and now the newfound love of his life. “I want her to know I’m a man of my word too.”

Jin’s heart went out to the youngest, seeing how torn but resolute he was. It was true that his impulsiveness had gotten him to places but this was just about the furthest things could possibly get.

Shelving aside his urge to reprimand him, he stood up, walked to Jungkook, and knelt down in front of him, pulling him into a hug.

Whispering into his ears in the most comforting way an older brother would, they made Jungkook’s tears find their way out of his eyes.

“You did the right thing.”

Jhope too, stepped forward and put his hand on Jungkook’s back, saddened to see his precious youngest on his knees.

“I’m proud of you Jungkookie.”

Taehyung simply knelt beside Jungkook and rested his head on his shoulder, telling him repeatedly that it was okay.

Before the boys got into an emotional crying mess, Suga stood up and turned to Namjoon.

“So, when can I meet my sister-in-law?”

==============================

[professor-it-tech]

CRITICAL MENTAL SKILLS FOR SMART CODING.

Computer Science » 10 Skills Necessary for Coding

10 Skills Necessary for Coding At its heart, coding is expression and problem solving. You can focus on its applications, on programming languages, but no matter how you practice it, you’ll cultivate these two essential skills, which will help you in all aspects of life. Besides existential value, learning to code proficiently will offer you myriad job opportunities, the ability to create your own schedule/work from anywhere, high wages for less hours of labor, eager to please clients that need/search for your help, and much more. Coders have more time to work on their passions, side projects, and enjoy a sense of self-reliance most workers don’t. They spend their time making websites, applications, and systems work, while building real solutions, and improving experiences for end users and employers alike. Coders have enhanced focus, because the issues they tackle require sustained, concentrated effort. This leads to greater productivity in all sectors of life. One of the greatest benefits from coding is consistently entering a state of flow, in which time, distraction and frustration melts away, allowing the coder to form a union with the task at hand. For all these reasons, coding casually or professionally can improve your life. So how to begin? Here we’ll examine ten skills that every coder needs.

1) Self-Reliance

This one is huge. When you start out coding, it can feel completely overwhelming. Should you focus on front end or back end? What programming languages should you use? Where to begin? Keeping in mind that the only way to eat an elephant is a bite at a time, pick something and start. There are infinite resources where you can learn to code, but it’s up to you to seek them out, and engage with them. There will be times where you want to give up, or have someone else show you how to do something, but the more you resist those urges and try and fail on your own, the greater your longterm success. To have any success in coding, you’ll have to master impatience, frustration, distraction and the dependence on external forces to solve technical problems (something we’re all increasingly reliant on). In order to combat these obstacles, there are several things you can do. The first is accepting responsibility.

You have the greatest influence on where you are, what you know, your capabilities, and how to change all of them. It’s never too late to recognize this and change your approach and efforts. Once you’ve taken responsibility, the information you consume and how you apply it, (your interest, study and effort) will dictate your ability to transcend your limitations (in this case, not being able to code vs. learning how to). It’s important to have a goal in mind. Why do you want to code? What problem do you want to solve, or what project are you hoping to manifest? Knowing the answers to these questions will help you narrow down where to focus your efforts, what languages to learn, etc. Finally, self-reliance boils down to the choices you make. You can’t just put in work blindly. The same way you need to have goals the work is aimed towards, you need to choose a path that will bring you towards them, independent of what others have done, or leaving it up to chance.

2) Language

It may seem obvious, but in order to write code, you’ll have to learn at least one programming or scripting language. Some resources for beginners include the completely free CodeAcademy, which has helped 24 million people begin their coding experience, edX, founded by Harvard and MIT, which offers 60 schools and GitHub, which gives you access to 500 free programming books that cover 80 different languages. Experts suggest trying to become proficient in one language rather than trying to learn very little of a few, the same way you would take French, Italian or Spanish rather than all three at once. So which language to begin with? That has a lot to do with what you’re trying to accomplish, but there are three that stand out for their multi-faceted applications, consistent utility and accessibility to beginners. These three are Python, Ruby and JavaScript.

Python, developed in the 80’s, is considered one of the easiest coding languages to learn. It’s free, open source, and most often classified as a scripting language (meaning it doesn’t require an explicit compilation step). It’s one of the most ubiquitous programming languages today, and used by the likes of Google, Yahoo! and NASA. Ruby is a similar beginner-accessible, extremely prevalent scripting language. It’s dynamic, object-oriented scripting language used to develop websites and mobile apps. Ruby was designed by Yukihiro Matsumoto to be easy, logical, and not require advanced knowledge of commands. Ruby on Rails, helped expand its usefulness for the web, and is used to make the framework for Twitter, Groupon and GitHub. It’s also often used for backend development. JavaScript (not Java) is most often used as aclient-side scripting language for front-end development. It’s the most frequently used programming language to make websites and games for Internet use, much of its syntax comes from the programming C Language. JavaScript is universal, running on all platforms and is in your browser (no installation required). Anything you want to build on the web will require some knowledge of JavaScript.

3) Logic

Were you a master of Geometry in high school? Love proofs? Live to assess the facts at hand and come to useful conclusions for problem solving? You may have a skeleton in one of the most important skills for coders. There’s a reason so many people that study math and physics end up as coders. Figuring out what mistake/bug/bad line of code led to an issue in a project is partially intuitive, but often an exercise in logic. So how do you build up your logic skills? Treat them like muscles, and exercise them. There are tools like Dcoder which gives you challenges/problems that will develop your reasoning. Another way to build logic skills is through conditional thinking, which essentially means, if this, then that. For example, let’s say if you climb more than halfway up the mountain, you’ll get a nose bleed. If you stay below the halfway point, you won’t. In programming, this style of thinking is used to test variables against values, and order action based on what conditions are met. It can be understood like this:

if (a condition evaluates to True): then do these things only for ‘True’ else: otherwise do these things only for ‘False’.

Simple mechanisms can’t do this. It’s these conditional statements that let the program take on an analytical life of its own and not just follow one set of instructions to its end. It’s important to use conditional thinking or statements to your benefit, but not live or die by them. They’re a tool to help expand the abilities of what you’re creating, but shouldn’t box you in in your ability to troubleshoot. Take the previous example. It’s important to realize just because someone’s nose is bleeding, doesn’t mean they went halfway up the mountain. Nose bleeds happen for all kinds of reasons. Removing yourself, and your subjective experiences from the situation at hand will be helpful. What you’ve encountered, or think you know, should be used as a suggestion, but not an end all. Be open to being proven wrong. Observe any problem or task as it is, and let that dictate how you approach it, doing so so from a what, how and then why progression.

4) Attention to Detail

Many programmers and coders don’t go to school to learn their trade. There are different ways to measure aptitude for coding, but nothing can substitute the effort a person makes, on their own. It’s one of the few areas in the world where self-taught hard work can lead to a lucrative, highly demanded career. What you won’t NEED to have learned, or have prerequisite abilities, will be mitigated by how closely you can pay attention to details. The understand of the interconnectivity in commands, general awareness and lingual precision are all extremely important parts of a coder’s toolkit. One way to do this is through organization. Instead of hammering yourself each time you overlook an important detail, build a game plan from which you can assess, review and improve your work. Maybe taking laps through the code you write, or promising to reread pertinent information at different times of the day, while working intermittently. Whatever works for you, just make sure you have a system beyond, “I will pay attention to the small stuff.” Scheduling your time leads to more productive, efficient work.

Improving your attention to detail has a lot to do with knowing what to look for. Towards that end, make lists. When you learn something that you know will be useful again and again, write it down. When you have work, research, new skills or languages to do or learn, list what you’re hoping to accomplish, and how you do it. When you achieve something on the list, put a check mark next to it (don’t cross it off, you may need to come back to it). Another way to improve your prescience is maintaining a schedule. You may not going to be as sharp after big meals, or first thing in the morning. You’ll figure out best when you’re most on point, but take note of it, and do your programming or coding work when you’re on top of your game. Another time-honored way to improve focus is meditation. Even focusing on your breath for 10-20 minutes a day will pay dividends in the rest of your life. Another surprising way to improve concentration? Exercise. At least 30 minutes a day leads to a marked improvement in focus. Most importantly, be gentle with yourself. Develop a sense of when to push through despite wanting to break, but also make sure to give yourself brief breaks when you’re feeling unmotivated or having trouble paying attention to details. Then when you come back you’ll be fresher and get better use of your effort.

5) Recognition of Stupidity

This could also be “understanding how computers think.” We’ve all been told not to make assumptions, but assuming common sense on behalf of a computer while programming or coding is a recipe for disaster. Computers are dumb, and ruthless. Their strength is their processing power, not independent or creative thought. They’ll do exactly what they’re told to, even when it might seem obvious to gently tweak instructions, or not follow the same ones again and again. People like Bill Gates and Stephen Hawking have warned about artificial intelligence leading to the apocalypse. Nick Bostrom, a student of super intelligence and the director of the Future of Humanity Institute at Oxford University, laid out how the world could be destroyed by artificial intelligence under instructions to maximize the number of paper clips in the world. If that AI was able to invent technology and build manufacturing plants…look out. “How could an AI make sure that there would be as many paper clips as possible?” asked Bostrom. “One thing it would do is make sure that humans didn’t switch it off, because then there would be fewer paper clips. So it might get rid of humans right away, because they could pose a threat. Also, you would want as many resources as possible, because they could be used to make paper clips. Like, for example, the atoms in human bodies.” So when you’re coding, make sure what you’re inputting is what you expect to be output, no more, no less. The program can’t make adjustments or improvements that it’s not told to do first.

Some of the greatest achievements in programming have been creating algorithms that get computers to think in more independent, brilliant and productive ways. Look into algorithms like Quicksort, Huffman Compression, the Fast Fourier Transform, and the Monte Carlo method to see what I mean. All of these have helped develop a major goal for coders: getting computers to do more of the heavy lifting through artificial intelligence, yet doing so in a way that is useful, focused and doesn’t lead to our species’ destruction. So when you’re coding, try to think the way a computer does, and use your attention to detail skills to make sure you specify exactly what you want, without leaving anything to chance or adaptation. You won’t have to specify EVERYTHING, some calculations will be made automatically to free you up to directing the program. But maintaining a mind frame where you don’t trust what you’re working on to do anything it wasn’t explicitly told to is extremely important.

6) Abstract Thinking

Abstract thinking is thinking done without the object of the thought present, or even physical. It’s a foundation of coding. Because the written code, and what it produces can never be observed and measured physically, successful coders have to develop an ability to think abstractly, in larger, more comparative ways than they may be used to. Abstract thinking is also the ability to think about a subject, object or project on many levels at once. Being able to balance different symbols, commands, and processes that are in place, running automatically, vs. those that you need to more directly oversee/renovate is an important, often overlooked part of coding. Abstract thinking is often improved through discussions with others. It involves a willingness to see things from a different angle, or to draw analytical conclusions from what might seem straightforward.

Let’s say for example that you told someone to go buy a pizza. That would work out great if the person automatically knows how to get to the pizza store, what money to bring, the pizza you’d like ordered, and even smaller, more minute calculations like how to drive, walk, or continue breathing. You might even bring back a pizza that I wouldn’t think I’d enjoy. But perhaps after eating it, I learn to love it. An abstract thinker could recognize something in my newfound reaction to a previously undesired pizza that speaks to the ability to change our feelings and desires even when we don’t think we will or want to. Being able to separate, create and visualize what a program knows, what it can know, what it’s compartmentalized already and how these factors interact are all essential to coding.

7) Patience

On horribly hot days, you have the choice to rebel against the heat, huffing, puffing, and letting agitation overheat you even further. Or you can give in to it. Accept that you’re cooking in the sun, picture yourself melting into the pavement, erasing separation from the heat in your mind. Coding is extremely difficult. Nothing that you’ve read here, or read somewhere else should be interpreted differently. At all stages, but especially when beginning, you should expect to feel extreme frustration. However, your ability to withstand that frustration, and move through it, without letting it discourage you will serve you in all that you do. Look at your frustration as a tool to develop your patience. When you’re coding, you’ll likely go through this experience: you write something. You’re extremely confident in it. You double and triple check it, and it still doesn’t work. You have no idea why it doesn’t work, what you did wrong, how to fix it, etc. It can be a crushing weight. You can feel useless, or like you’ll never be successful, not just at this project, but in life. Take comfort in the fact that countless people have felt this way before you. How you deal with this feeling is all that matters. If you believe in your ability to overcome, find a new route, or even start from scratch and improve, you can and will (or at least you’ll have a way better shot than those that give up completely).

Paying attention to details goes hand in hand with taking time to let their meaning develop. “Details matter,” Steve Jobs said. “It’s worth waiting to get it right.” Recognize that when you’re struggling, what you’re dealing with is uncomfortable, but not intolerable. Repeating that to yourself until it becomes ingrained will be very helpful. Let the pain you feel from frustration push you to find solutions. Solutions rarely come from desperation, or the quickest, wildest approach. A big part of patience is talking to yourself. When you hear the voice of, “you’ll never do this, this is impossible, just give up,” be ready to counter it with a more determined, softer, kinder voice that represents your deeper, persevering core. One of the best ways to build patience is through reading, or really any sustained activity that requires focus. The longer you can do one thing, despite the temptation to quit, or go do another, the better your ability to overcome the frustration of coding will be.

8) Strong Memory

Innovation and improvisation are extremely important to coding. In many cases you’ll find yourself completely baffled, or faced with a problem, project or situation you think you know nothing about. Sometimes you’ll be right. Often, if you think hard enough through your experiences, you’ll realize something you’ve already encountered may prove useful again. It might be from direct coding experience, or it might be an abstract, unrelated memory that somehow seems pertinent, or just through recalling it makes you think of something useful for the moment at hand. While working with the same languages, you’ll internalize syntax, and it will feel less like using memory and more second nature to recall important commands.

When it comes to long term memory, you’ll be aided by infinite manuals, websites and tools that will help you recall important information. As you develop your abilities (and want to complete projects faster), memorizing more information will be useful, but it’s not something to worry about immediately. However, when it comes to short term memory, you’ll want to do whatever you can to cultivate and improve your natural faculties. Coders need to be aware of many different pieces of information at once, and know how they’ll all react to each other. Being aware and able to visualize design, data flow, algorithms, data structures, and how they effect each other will separate you from the average coder. At first it can feel like juggling herring with ravenous dolphins jumping all around you, but it gets easier. This is where memory and flow coincide. The more you can lose yourself in the project, the less it will seem like a struggle to remember different aspects of the work. Meditation techniques and memory exercises can help with this as well.

9) Scientific Method

The problems/challenges of coding can seem infinite, daunting, and impossible to begin. That’s where using the scientific method to break down obstacles and projects themselves can become extremely helpful. In most jobs, you develop and learn many ways to solve problems in the first year or so, then apply them from there on, occasionally developing new solutions as well. But in programming, a good deal of your time will be spent developing solutions to problems that have never been solved (at least not in the exact way you’re encountering them). You won’t have information on how to go about solving them, you’ll have to use trial and error. Seeing coding as research or experimentation will be extremely useful. It’ll also aid you in terms of deadlines. Because you’re doing something new, you can honestly expect leeway because it’s unclear how long it will take to properly solve a problem. Following these steps will help you with whatever project you’re working on.

Start with a hypothesis. What do you think the program you’re writing will accomplish? Or, what do you think a program look like that could solve a particular problem? Next, you outline how you will write the code, either on paper or in your head. Then you take a crack at it, and see what you came up with. That’s followed by comparing what you created, and the control, or what the program was supposed to do. It’s also aided by showing the program to others and getting their input on what you’ve done. Does the program you created match what you expected? Does it serve the function it’s supposed to? Finally, you begin debugging, or bringing the program closer to the ideal you’d imagined.

10) Communication and Empathy

Perhaps the most overlooked aspect of programming has little to do with the manual and mental labor of writing code. Coding is an insular world that effects our lives more each day. Coders need to be able to work with, and explain what they do to employers, clients, consumers and coworkers that don’t understand what they do. Writing clean, effective code is great, but when you pair it with strong empathy and communication skills for beginning coders, end users, you become the rising cream. Anyone can say, “this is how we’re doing it,” or, “you just don’t understand.” Elite coders listen to feedback and adjust, even if those providing it don’t understand the ramifications of their words. An effective coder can manage expectations, interpret vague desires and honestly assess and communicate what is, and isn’t possible. Coders are known for their egos, but those willing to patiently give and accept advice and direction are far more respected than snarling programmers that only relate to their desktops.

Empathy is the art of comprehension, awareness, sensitivity and sharing of other people’s emotions. When coupled with the ability to express and prioritize others’ priorities and feelings, it’s extremely potent. Communication and empathy breeds positive, actionable accountability, and will make your job far easier in the long run. You’ll better understand others’ needs, feelings, and how your behavior and work are received and interpreted. And irregardless of coding, or work life, better communication and empathy will make you happier, more convincing and more durable to the negativity of others and hardships of life. These are skills that require proactive, consistent development, with the same level of focus and commitment you’d apply to learning a language or working on an important project.

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[funkymbtifiction]

Annie Hall: Alvy Singer [INTJ]

OFFICIAL TYPING BY: mysterylover123

Introverted Intuition (Ni): Alvy sees connections between everything. He’s a conspiracy theorist, a neurotic, and constantly fixates on some specific goal to the exclusion of altering factors. He needs everything to fit in with his grand vision of how the world works. He sums up most people easily on first meeting them, such as his first wife Allison Porchnik, quickly creating a complete idea of his own about who they are. His imagination is quick to spin off possibilities for the world around him, such as the famous fantasy of what to do when stuck in a movie line behind a pontificating hyper-analyst. He anticipates many events before they occur, and seeks to prevent any kind of negative outcome, overthinking even his first kiss with Annie.

Extroverted Thinking (Te): Alvy’s opinions are very decided and he doesn’t care to filter them, insulting people to their face almost casually, as if their defects and failures are just matter-of-fact, obvious truths. He’s usually very practical and logical, expressing a need to attain as much information as possible in order to best handle a situation. He uses big words and complex terms for the simplest of concepts. He comes across as bossy and authoritative, instructing others on what they should do with their lives.

Introverted Feeling (Fi): Alvy processes his feelings internally; the film follows him trying to understand his breakup with Annie in hindsight. His values are rigid and unyielding; his morals refuse to bend for anything or anyone. He generally keeps his real emotions hidden, trying to maintain a cool facade. He strongly disparages emotional excess of any kind. He usually expresses his emotions through his actions rather than through direct expression.

Extroverted Sensing (Se): Alvy is more than a little bit uncomfortable in physical environments. He’s constantly dissatisfied with his surroundings, complaining about the slightest thing that doesn’t go as planned. He usually expresses his physical needs at the worst possible times. He’s very anxious about physical situations, and doesn’t even drive because of his difficulty with his environment. His observations are usually connected to his Ni, as he constantly channels them into bigger observations.

[liberaldesignnidap-blog]

What is Design thinking?

Sahithi Kavili writes a brief summary of a famous article on Design Thinking, originally written by Tim Brown. Tim Brown is an accomplished design thinker, who has been the CEO of IDEO, a world-renowned design consultation firm. The original article was published in the Jun 2008 issue of Harvard Business Review. Link: https://hbr.org/2008/06/design-thinking

Design thinking transforms the very strategy used to create and develop products, services and processes. During Thomas Edison’s time, the electric light bulb was revolutionary, but as a good designer he knew that one brilliant invention without subsequent context to support and render it truly useful to the masses was little more than a shot in the dark. His foresight to develop a working marketplace around the light bulb is what set in motion a wholesome and human-centered design thinking model for aspiring designers to follow.

Another interesting aspect of Edison’s design thinking is that he surrounded himself with diversely gifted thinkers and experimental thinkers. He introduced a team-based approach to innovation along with endless rounds of trial and error. He believed not in creating out of an echo-chamber of one’s own validations but a culmination of experiments and many failings. Moreover, aesthetics and brand perception should not be separate from the functional value of a product or service. Rather than making already designed products more attractive to consumers, designers should aim to strategically incorporate all aspects of the design from the very beginning of the design process.

A short case study on the heath care provider Kaiser Permanente is an example of strategic design thinking to enhance the quality of care given to the patients as well as the experiences of the practitioners. By teaching them the design theory, they could then themselves propose and implement solutions to impending problems in the workplace. This sort of innovative environment encouraged the workers to explore potential solutions to better their service through rapid brainstorming and prototyping. They achieved a convenient shift-management system in which they logged the details of their shifts into a database and had more time to be productive with the patient, increasing their own work satisfaction as well as the quality of their patients’ stay.

Prototypes should not be a burden for an excited, quick thinker. It shouldn’t be expensive or require complex attention or extensive resources which would hinder the fast-paced trial and error process. Prototypes should only take as much time and effort required to generate ample feedback and proceed with a refined prototype going forward. The goal of a prototype isn’t to have a “finished” product but a malleable manifestation of ideas.

Tim Brown strongly believes that people have a natural aptitude for design thinking, which is only developed further with the right design training. Design thinkers should be able to envision the impact of their creations from various viewpoints by taking a people-first approach, dramatically improve existing alternatives by taking into account both the obvious as well as the obscure aspects, maintain a positive outlook despite failed attempts, pose questions that lead to evoke new ideas and have significant experience in more than one discipline while employing thinkers from different educational backgrounds.

The design process is not a series of milestones that one must cross to successful come up with a brilliant idea but rather a systematic set of stages that together form a cycle of creative thinking and implementation of those ideas. The process must ultimately cycle through the stages of “inspiration” which may arise from a problem, a demanding situation, or opportunity which motivates the search for solutions. The next stage would be “ideation,” the testing of ideas, and last but not least “implementation,” for the execution of the vision and paving a path to the market. Projects will particularly run through the first two spaces more than once as original ideas are refined and improved upon multiple viewings.

Another short case study of IDEO and Shimano’s team worked on a market of high-end casual bike that appealed to the older generation. They came up with a simple, fun coasting bike that was made for pleasure rather transport. They achieved this by spending time with all types of customers and understanding which particular qualities of the present bike market was repelling its customers. This human-centered exploration through surveys and detailed questioning is what precisely urged a smart and far-reaching innovation that paved the way to a widely untapped and neglected market.

Many of the world’s most successful brands are renowned for their products and services due to their empathy and sensitivity towards the consumer’s needs. Parallel to their human-centered approach, they also make good use of the design principles to innovate uniquely and garner value to their product/service.

A good application of design thinking to overcome socioeconomic constraints is India’s Aravind Eye Care System which might even be the world’s largest eye care provider. In one year, Aravind served an approximate of 2.3 million patients and preformed more than 270,000 surgeries. Its aim was to eradicate avoidable blindness among Indians, including its rural population. Aravind’s holistic approach of not only providing ophthalmic service but creating a system of eye care that would reach India’s poorest areas is reminiscent of Edison’s human-centered agenda. Since 1990, Aravind has held ‘eye camps’ in India’s rural areas, taught eye care, established a bus system, screenings, and free service for those who cannot afford it. It even built its own solution to the problem of extremely expensive intraocular lenses from $200 per pair to $4 per pair through a manufacturing plant in a hospital basement. In this way it created an attainable and accessible solution to a social and medical problem.

A successful design thinker must aim to have a cumulative portfolio of short-term ideas as well as long-term ones. They must invest effort in both ends of the spectrum and expand their ability to work with both ideas that are still in progress and ones that are closer to entering the market. They must be able to re-track their funding process if circumstance demands it. Hiring from various disciplines will allow them the experimental advantage of diverse ideas and innovations. It is beneficial to construct and encourage the design thinking process so projects can go through the three stages efficiently.

Many times, the products in the market that appeal to the consumers are not the ones that are the very first of their kind but the ones that attract through both their emotional appeal and functionality. A new savings account service called “Keep the Change” was widely successful because it was founded on an emotionally satisfying aspect of human behavior of saving money without even trying. Once the savings account was a success among the public, it naturally acquired a value in the business world as well.

All around us exist problems that can only be solved in a creative and efficient way though the design thinking process. Ideas must be brainstormed, prototyped, tested, observed for potential changes and tweaks, brainstormed again, prototyped again, refined, and then implemented. Each solution that is borne as a result of smart and intuitive design thinking allows it to be specifically concerned with its effect on the people it aids without compromising on aesthetics, therefore encouraging more functional and emotional solutions and innovations to complex issues in the future.

[sempiternalsandpitturtle]

How to write a product description that sells (+ 11 examples)

A product description is copy that tells customers about the features of an offering. Its purpose is to help buyers understand why they should purchase the product. Effective descriptions generate sales by explaining the product’s unique value proposition as well as how it solves a frustrating problem.

Why are product descriptions important?

The buyer’s decision-making process initiates long before he or she arrives at your product pages. Whether you’re selling consumer products or business services, your target customer has likely encountered a problem and is looking for a solution.

Marketing assets like traditional advertisements, social media campaigns, blogs and videos generate awareness of your brand and drive readers to your ecommerce website or store. At that point, your product descriptions take over and perform the heavy lifting. It’s the product description’s job to get the buyer over the last hurdle.

A weak product description can be the Achilles heel of a marketing campaign. All of the other assets can work perfectly, but an uninformative product description can derail everything at the last minute. In fact, 98% of shoppers have stopped mid-way through a purchase because content on the page was incomplete or inaccurate.

Your marketing campaigns should increase interest in your offerings, while your product descriptions reinforce trust in your brand. Missing information, spelling errors, bad product photography and similar blunders can quickly erode trust in your brand. On the other hand, polished product descriptions make your company look legitimate and professional. You need that trust to make sales.

How service descriptions support B2B marketing

Marketers who are in the business of selling intangible services face a unique challenge. How do you describe something that has no physical form? What type of imagery do you use to showcase a service with little to no observable features?

Service descriptions can be more challenging to write, but they follow a pattern similar to descriptions of products. Namely, their purpose is to help buyers make a final decision.

If your organisation has a sales team, there’s a good chance you already have everything you need to craft effective service descriptions. It’s best practice to align your descriptions with your sales pitch. This creates consistency for your buyers and ensures your sales team isn’t thrown off guard by an unfamiliar claim.

Service descriptions help to convert customers by showing them the solution to a challenge. For example, if buyers are looking for accounting services, they may want to know things like what types of reports the firm can produce or how frequently they will be available for consulting.

Many of the best practices described below will apply to service descriptions. Always keep in mind the customer’s goals when describing the products or services you provide.

11 product description best practices that increase sales engagement

Effective product descriptions not only give customers information about the offering but also deliver psychological triggers. According to Harvard Business School professor Gerald Zaltsman, 95% of purchase decisions take place in the subconscious mind.

As you write product descriptions, pay close attention to the types of words and phrases you use. Action verbs and active phrasing are key to driving buyer behaviors. In addition, you’ll want to write unique descriptions for each of your products to avoid getting penalised for duplicate content on your site.

Measure your descriptions against these 11 best practices to ensure they lead to the results you’re looking for:

1. Write with your ideal buyer in mind

To write a persuasive product description, you must understand your target audience. Refer to your buyer personas as you develop the marketing copy that will go on your product and service pages. This will help you understand which features and benefits appeal to the people who are most likely to buy from you.

Ask yourself these questions about your customers as you develop your descriptions:

How will our customers find this product page?

What problem are they trying to solve?

What do they already know about our product?

What benefits and features will they find most interesting?

As Seth Godin explained, one of the main goals of your marketing efforts is to help your loyal customers learn how to talk about your products with their friends and acquaintances. How can your product descriptions help them to spread the word about your offering?

Example: KitchenAid

KitchenAid demonstrates its understanding of buyer challenges by highlighting key benefits in the description of its stand mixer. Several of the bullet points describe use cases that the reader will easily relate with.

2. Avoid obvious statements

An effective product description should certainly contain a description of your product – but try to avoid the obvious. If you sell shoes, for example, you probably don’t need to explain that your products are garments designed to protect the customer’s feet from the ground.

We call these “water is wet” statements. They’re obvious facts that the reader should understand intuitively. If someone reading your product descriptions doesn’t understand these essentials, they probably aren’t yet ready to buy. You can use other types of marketing content like blogs and infographics to get them up to speed before they return to your product pages.

Example: Police Dog Pet Costume

This description for a police costume for a dog describes the costume as resembling a police uniform. It’s a bit redundant, don’t you think?

3. Be careful with superlatives

If your product is the easiest, the most advanced or the best in the world, then by all means tell your customers about it. But make sure you can back up your claims. If your claims are overly bold, skeptical readers will likely roll their eyes and walk away.

You could walk from Manhattan to Brooklyn and see half a dozen or more pizza shops that claim to offer the best pies in the city. Some even claim to be world famous. Not only are these types of statements unverifiable, but they’re also easy to refute. Ask anyone in Iowa City if they’ve ever heard of Di Fara Pizzeria and you’re likely to get more blank stares than salivating mouths.

If you’re going to claim to be the best, the most intuitive, the most affordable or any other superlative, make sure you have the data to back up your claim.

Example: Titleist

This product may be simple, but Titleist knows it’s speaking to dedicated golfers, not just casual enthusiasts. Its description uses strong, evocative language because it’s claiming to be the best on the market.

4. Appeal to your buyer’s senses

Creative writing helps buyers to imagine themselves using the product before they make a decision to buy. Evoke the five senses in your writing to spur these leaps of imagination. Expressive language elevates your product descriptions from bland characterisations to enticing depictions.

For example, clothiers selling to the fashionable crowd may describe how their outfits hang comfortably from the wearer’s frame. A maker of handcrafted fountain pens might describe how smoothly the nib distributes ink across the paper.

Spend some time using your product and make notes about the sensations you experience. How does the product make you feel? Which of your senses are involved in the experience? Work these impressions into your copy.

Example: David’s Tea

In a photo, dried tea leaves don’t look like much. David’s Tea uses product descriptions that prompt readers to imagine themselves taking a sip and inhaling the delicious aroma.

5. Tell your brand story

Every piece of marketing collateral you produce has a place within your brand story, and your product descriptions are no exception. Like any good story, the narrative of your brand should evoke an emotion in your customers.

Within your product descriptions, your brand story will likely relate to the overcoming of a challenge. As customers near the point in their journey when they’re ready to make a purchase, they’re likely anticipating how the product will make a change in their lives. Your marketing copy should confirm that feeling and add to it.

Remember, you are not always the author of your brand story. Your customers are just as responsible for the direction your business takes. Find ways to include the customer in that journey and you’ll have a strong product description.

Example: Red Wing Shoes

Red Wing Shoes has been around since 1905, and the brand injects all of its marketing with those decades of experience. This product description calls on the craftsmanship of a bygone era to describe this modern product.

6. Align your descriptions with other marketing efforts

Product description writers shouldn’t work in a bubble. In fact, everyone working in marketing and sales should be on the same page when describing product benefits.

Look through your recent marketing campaigns and pull out the appeals that have worked well. Your product descriptions should confirm the findings laid out in your blogs and conform with the data you present in your infographics.

Customers will likely encounter your brand several times before they decide to purchase. If they see discrepancies between your ad campaigns, they may think twice about handing over their hard-earned cash.

Example: Squarespace

Squarespace aligns its traditional advertising messages with the copy found on its product pages. In the ad example, Squarespace claims that its websites can help businesses stand out in the marketplace. In the description example, the brand extends the claim by showing how its SEO tools increase brand awareness.

7. Provide social proof

When customers see how other buyers have benefitted from a product or service, they’re more likely to make a purchase. Including social proof such as testimonials and case studies in your product descriptions can nudge customers in the right direction.

For example, you could include customer snapshots of their purchased products in addition to your polished imagery. This can help potential buyers to imagine themselves using your product. In addition, some customers will always take marketing copy with a grain of salt. Social proof helps these customers see how your offerings perform in the real world.

Example: The Bullet Journal Method by Ryder Carroll

This example follows a tried-and-true method of social proof that book sellers have leveraged for decades. Above the description, in bold text are those coveted words: “New York Times bestseller”. Clearly, many people have already benefited from the advice within the book.

8. Optimise your text for readability

The length of your product description will depend on the offering and the assumed level of knowledge possessed by your target audience. Whether you need just a few sentences or a couple of paragraphs, you should ensure your descriptions are scannable.

Use bullet points, short paragraphs and bolded words to help potential buyers find the information they need immediately. If you need to go into detail about several aspects of your product, then consider writing a brief summary followed by more detailed paragraphs.

Example: GreenWorks

It’s just the facts in this scannable product description. Potential buyers are probably comparing several different mowers based on price point and features. This description clearly lays out the most important details to help customers make their purchase decision.

9. Don’t forget about SEO

Written product descriptions have two audiences: humans who will buy your products and search algorithms that will help humans find your product pages. Placing keywords in your product descriptions can help them to rank higher on search engine results pages (SERPs), as well as site-specific search results, such as on the Amazon marketplace.

Try to include one keyword in your product titles and one or two more in your bullet points. Think about the search queries that users might use to find your product and use similar language.

Check out our complete Amazon SEO guide to learn more.

Example: Bose

The product title for these headphones contains several keywords that potential buyers might search on Amazon. This way, a single description can capture buyers looking for Bluetooth-enabled products, noise-cancelling devices or headphones equipped with digital assistants.

10. Use a mix of media

Effective product descriptions are accompanied by enticing imagery. Use high-definition pictures and videos to support the claims made in your copy. For instance, if you can claim that your product makes a process more efficient, show this advantage in action.

For many shoppers, seeing is believing. The more concrete proof you can provide to support your claims, the better. This is also a great opportunity to repurpose some of your other marketing materials. For instance, if you have recorded a product demonstration, cut it up into short clips or gifs to display on your product page.

Example: Milk Bar

Milk Bar uses a combination of photography, high-definition gifs, illustrations and text to describe its birthday cake offering. Each piece works in tandem to appeal to the reader’s senses as well as their need for a quality product. Potential buyers have everything they need to make a decision.

11. Conduct split tests

Even the best marketing writers don’t create perfect copy the first time around. There is simply too much to know about your target audience. No matter how much prior research you conduct, you’ll likely miss something important.

So what happens when you have two or more great ideas, but you don’t know which will drive the most sales? That’s where split testing comes in. Using a tool like Google Optimise or enterprise email marketing platforms, you can test multiple versions of your copy and measure the results of each to determine which is best. You might find that a certain turn of phrase leads to more conversions than another. But you won’t know until you test them both.

Repurposing descriptions as marketing collateral

Product descriptions should fit nicely into your content repurposing workflow. If you follow the best practices above, each of your descriptions will be a highly optimised summary of everything customers want to know about your offerings.

The next time you’re stuck for an appeal when creating new content, you can turn to your product descriptions for inspiration. In addition, the alignment between your product pages and content marketing will help steer potential buyers in the right direction.

By repurposing your product descriptions, you can extend the reach of your content and ensure that new buyers are exposed to your products’ features and benefits.

from http://bit.ly/36XjuMM

[hellotechsgeeksfan]

Verdict

A colour display, connected GPS, water-resistance, heart rate sensor and great battery life make the Xiaomi Mi Band 4 the best cheap activity tracker available right now. 

Pros

Super-affordable

Waterproof

Lasts nearly a month on a single charge

Touchscreen display

Cons

Syncing to Google Fit is buggy

Limited notification functionality

Key Specifications

Review Price: £34.99

20-day battery life

Waterproof up to 50m

24/7 heart rate monitoring

Connected GPS Automatic

Sleep tracking

The Xiaomi Mi Band 4 is a fitness tracker that everyone can afford at £35, and it’s one of the best to boot. It easily matches the quality of the £90 Fitbit Inspire HR, even outdoing it with better battery life. It works with Android smartphones and iPhones.

The Band 4 packs in a heart rate sensor, GPS when connected to your phone, and plenty of watch faces. If you’re happy to use Xiaomi’s Mi Fit app to view your fitness data, then it is hands-down worth the insanely low asking price. Xiaomi Mi Band 4 screen and design – Far from an exciting look

There have been three versions of the Mi Band prior to the Mi Band 4, and all have improved upon the winning formula of a slim, surprisingly well-featured fitness tracker at a killer price to arrive at this latest version. The Mi Band 4 is the best of the bunch, and certainly worth every penny in terms of what’s on offer.

What you don’t get is a particularly exciting design. The Mi Band 4 is as plain as they come, with a black silicone band into which the small pebble-shaped tracker sits. This allows you to buy additional straps and charge the tracker in its proprietary charging cradle.

That tiny tracker packs in a 0.95in capacitive colour touchscreen, a heart rate sensor, home button, 5-ATM water-resistance, 512MB of RAM, an accelerometer and a gyroscope. Once you’ve charged up the device and snapped it into the strap, it’s a tracker you can put on and will likely forget you’re wearing since it weighs just 22.1g.

Related: Best fitness trackers 2019

The tracker unit pops out of the silicone strap

The one thing to note about the Mi Band 4’s display is that it can be difficult to read in direct sunlight. And that’s it – there isn’t much else to say about the Mi Band 4’s design. That’s to its credit, however. You simply put it on, forget you’re wearing it, and it will go about its business of tracking everything. Xiaomi Mi Band 4 activity and exercise tracking – Trustworthy tracking

The Mi Band 4 has you covered with step tracking, calories burned, distance travelled, heart rate and sleep tracking. That’s a fair amount, and it will collect all of this data without you even interacting with the device.

In addition, it has workout modes that you must manually trigger; there’s no auto-workout detection of the type you find on more expensive fitness trackers. But having the ability to start workouts on the Mi Band 4 itself is an upgrade on previous generations of the device, where you’d set them off from the Mi Fit app.

For an outdoor run, stick your phone in your pocket and start the run from the Mi Band. It will connect to your phone’s GPS to track your route, which you can view in the app after your run is complete alongside stats on your pace, average heart rate, stride and cadence and split times.

Also included are reminders to move, if you’ve been at your desk too long, plus alerts when your heart rate is higher than normal (I didn’t get this warning during my testing, even after workouts).

There are modes for treadmill, cycling, walking, weights and, thanks to the Mi Band 4’s 5-ATM water-resistance, swimming too. Putting the Mi Band 4 through its paces, I was incredibly impressed with what it could achieve for the price.

Testing the device against the Samsung Galaxy Watch Active 2 and the Polar Vantage V watch to compare stats, I found the Mi Band 4’s figures pretty accurate. I’d advise that you always connect to your phone’s GPS for runs, since this results in far more accurate distance and cadence readings. Without GPS data the Mi Band simply has to guess, resulting in less accurate readings – although this is also true for rivals products without built-in GPS, and actually includes every Fitbit except the Fitbit Ionic.

The bottom line here is that I trust the £35 Mi Band 4 to accurately record my workouts to the same degree as a device such as the £199 Fitbit Versa 2, backing up Xiaomi’s irresistible pricing. Xiaomi Mi Band 4 Mi Fit app and notifications – The Mi Fit app has some limitations

A downside to the Mi Band 4 is the Mi Fit app, which is less than intuitive at the best of times. Like Google Fit, Samsung Health or the Fitbit app, it collects data from the Mi Band and displays it in different sections.

Think of it as a very basic overview of your metrics. You can drill down to see historic workouts and walks, but it isn’t obvious how to find them – and neither is it clear what is interactive and what isn’t. It’s a bit of trial and error to actually find all the stats you’re after.

When you do eventually find the stats you’re after, readouts can be useful and detail several metrics of a workout.

When the whole point of a fitness tracker is to be able to view your health data, the Mi Fit app can be a tad frustrating. If you’re a relatively casual observer of your steps and workouts, however, you shouldn’t have a problem.

Mi Fit is meant to be able to link to Google Fit to share and display data, but in testing I couldn’t get this to work properly.

Thankfully, selecting different watch faces is easy and there are plenty from which to choose. However, they’re all much of a muchness on a screen that’s less than an inch wide.

The Mi Fit app is unintuitive, but offers plenty of information

One thing the Mi Band 4 can’t do is interactive notifications – not that you’d want to try to type a reply to a message on the tiny display. The device can notify you of incoming calls and texts, and selected app notifications (you can pick them in the Mi Fit app), which is handy if you don’t want every ping from your phone delivered to your wrist. The vibration motor in the Mi Band 4 is surprisingly good for its size, but is a pretty basic buzz.

There’s also a raise to wake the display option hidden in the Mi Fit app settings, and you can set a “do not disturb” mode on the band if wearing the device to bed. Add to that on-watch alarms, a stopwatch and music controls for what’s playing on your phone, and you can really appreciate just how much tracker you’re getting here. Xiaomi Mi Band 4 battery life and charging – Impressive endurance

Xiaomi quotes a battery life of 20 days; I found that to be accurate and then some. I charged the Mi Band 4 to 100% on my first day of testing, and after a week of constant use it was at 75%. The battery will run down noticeably faster when you’re using the connected GPS modes for workouts.

Even then, I’d confidently say you’ll get at least 10 days of charge if doing workouts every day – and it will likely go for longer on most occasions. It doesn’t seem like the Mi Band 4’s 24/7 heart rate monitoring kills the battery either, which is great.

A slight annoyance – but not one exclusive to the Mi Band 4 – is the proprietary USB charging cradle. Even £500 fitness watches usually come with a product-specific charger, but it’s frustrating at any price point if you lose it.

The proprietary charger included in the box should I buy the Xiaomi Mi Band 4?

If you want to see if a fitness tracker will benefit you in any way, but don’t want to break the bank, the Xiaomi Mi Band 4 is a no-brainer. For £35 you get many of the same features found on trackers costing three or four times the price – and in a product that doesn’t itself feel overly cheap.

The Mi Band 4 is a good option if you don’t want to fork out for a more expensive Fitbit, and I’d even recommend it to casual runners for tracking runs, so long as you’re happy to take your phone with you to use connected GPS.

The one downside is the slightly frustrating Mi Fit app, plus the fact that syncing to the Google Fit app didn’t work in my testing.

Overall, though, the Mi Band 4’s colour display, connected GPS, water-resistance, heart rate sensor and great battery life make it the best cheap activity tracker available right now.

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