#though the past few years have been so weird after laughter doesn't feel that long ago

[thechildisgone]

NEW PARAMORE TECHNICALLY TONIGHT WELL MIDNIGHT IM SO EXCITEDDD

[octarianstrength]

It's late at night in the domes, not that there's much of a noticeable difference between that and daytime. Normally Yulia would be asleep right now, being the diligent Octarian soldier she is, but tonight is a rare exception.

The sound of quiet laughter can be heard from an otherwise silent restaurant near the exact center of a dome, far away from the upper areas where Yulia lives. She's inside, along with a shorter octoling that has long, bright pink tentacles and dressed in greasy tank top with baggy cargo pants, a rather typical look for a lot of engineers.

"I remember that like it was yesterday!" The shorter octoling exclaimed with a chuckle. "Otto's tentacle was flattened for like an entire week afterwards!"

Yulia smiled, looking down at them. Her goggles had been removed some time ago so she could let her friend see her eyes, and also to prevent them from fogging up thanks to the steamy noodles they had been eating.

"Yeah... He was kind of an arse though, so... deserved."

"Yeah! But hey, that's enough about the past! I wanna know how you're doing now! What's going on in the world of the awesome Octarian general?"

"Oh... well not a whole lot lately. The army has been back to just making sure things don't fall apart and preparing for our next operation ever since... well. Ya know."

"Right..." The octoling looked downcast, like she regretted bringing up something painful.

Yulia noticed this almost immediately and felt the need to comfort her friend. "Don't worry about it, Chip. We might have suffered another loss, but we'll come back from it." She doesn't suppose that's very reassuring, but she has to try.

Come on, think Yulia. THINK!

OH! I got it!

"Ya know, around the same time we lost it, those mysterious disappearances stopped happening. I might have to look into what was going on since I was busy with other stuff at the time, but we might make progress on figuring out what was actually happening with all that soon."

Come to think of it... is this actually helpful...?

Apparently it was, at least to some degree, as Chippy's bright smile returned.

"Really? After all this time?"

"Yeah. The last unexplained disappearance was quite a few years ago. Some young girl. Don't think she had even finished training... Hopefully it's all over now."

"Yeah...!" Chippy hesitated to speak up further, but the feeling of having that burning question in the back of her mind persisted. "But um... what about you? Are you still alright after the incident?"

Yulia looked off to the side for just a second. She doesn't like the idea of lying to such a close friend, but what choice does she have?

"Yeah... I'm fine. Felt weird afterward for a little while, not gonna lie, but..."

"Sorry. I'll drop it. I've just been worried about you since then-"

"Oh no, you're fine! You're just trying to make sure I'm okay, right? It's all good. I appreciate it." Yulia smiled at her. She can at least be glad about that not being a lie.

"Yeah... I always did care a little too much I guess..."

Yulia stood up and pulled Chippy of her chair to wrap her in a loving hug. She had intended for it to only last a few seconds, but it seems as though neither party is interested in having it end quickly.

"Sorry I was there for it... and sorry we only get to meet up like this every few weeks if we're lucky."

"Oh, don't you worry about it! I couldn't be more proud of you! I'm sure everyone's sick of me talking about how awesome my Kraken class sister is!"

Yulia let out one last quiet chuckle and finally let go, happy that the night had ended on a much more positive note. "Yeah... but you're right."

She set some money on the counter for the lone worker that had been tending to the store this late at night and gave Chippy one of her signature, firm handshakes.

"We'll talk again soon, okay? Hopefully without as much of a wait as this time."

"Alright, I'll see you around. And you better stay safe!"

The pair went their separate ways soon after, heading in opposite directions to get back to their homes. It was a nice night to be sure, Yulia just wishes it hadn't taken so much of an emotional toll on her. It's nothing a good sleep won't fix up though... hopefully.

[god1ngs]

━‎ ghost of a memory

synopsis; the ghost of a man comes back.

contains; pogtopia wilbur spoilers, yandere themes, mentions of death, implied death, swearing, mentions of stalking, wilbur is a creep in this

yandere c!wilbur soot / reader, 2.8k wc

note; this is the longest thing i've ever written >:)) very proud of this

masterlist

‎ ‎ ‎it was snowing, like it usually was. the layers of snow piled up on the floor only to get crushed down by your boot. you were on your way back to your house, ready to lay down and relax. days were hard now, especially since having moved away from the dream smp and l'manberg.

‎ ‎ ‎it was easy at first, but you were more lonely now. there was no tommy to come greet you in the mornings, or no tubbo to show you his new bee portrait done by someone else. it was lonely, only your presence to comfort you when days got too lonely.

‎ ‎ ‎you lived near techno, phil, and ranboo, but you never really talked to them. while you could hold your own, the angel of death and blood god striked fear into your heart. phil, although somewhat of an intimidating man, had been much different after the explosion of l'manberg.

‎ ‎ ‎you hadn't been there to know what happened, but it was something severely detrimental from what you've heard. and you haven't even heard that much. you heard of how l'manberg was exploded, but didn't know much else. there was a way people looked whenever you asked about it though.

‎ ‎ ‎you set down your things as you came inside your house, tired from the long day of venturing out from the snowy area. you had been trying to find some more resources, having been slowly running out of some minor ones, but wanting to have them nonetheless. sighing, you tiredly looked down at your hands.

‎ ‎ ‎you never went a day without thinking of what you had done with those hands. blood splattered along the calloused palms of them, rough from gripping swords and bows. you regretted your previous decisions, having worked alongside l'manberg. while you didn't regret meeting the people, the experiences would plague you for years to come.

‎ ‎ ‎a knock on your door brung you out of your mind, gentle and soft. it was unlike any of the loud banging from the war. you shook away your troubles, wanting to block out everything from your past as a soldier. you opened the door, hesitantly bringing your hand to the sword rested on your side.

‎ ‎ ‎it was ranboo. he stood at the door, taller than your doorframe, and looking down at you. "oh," you said, retracting your hand from the hilt of it. "hello ranboo. what brings you here?" you were curious, never having really been close to ranboo during your time at l'manberg. you two had become closer since you lived in each others radius, but had never talked for a long time.

‎ ‎ ‎"uh, i just.. i just wanted to ask if you've seen ghostbur. i haven't seen him in a while and was wondering if you have?" the dual boy asked, tugging at his shirt collar. ghostbur? your brows furrowed, a nervousness piling in your stomach. did he mean wilbur? he seemed confident about what he had said though.

‎ ‎ ‎you cleared your throat before speaking again, leaning against the doorframe. "who's ghostbur?" you asked, confused. maybe it was just a mess up with his name, ranboo was very forgetful after all. realization crossed his features, eyes wide. "you don't know who ghostbur is?"

‎ ‎ ‎disbelief coated his tone, shining in his eyes as well. the boy stammered, trying to figure out what to say. "oh boy, uh..." he exhaled harshly, scratching at his neck in nervousness. "do you know what happened when l'manberg was blown up?" you hadn't known much, but you did know what mainly happened ─ l'manberg had been blown to the smithereens.

‎ ‎ ‎"not really, i guess. i mean, i know l'manberg was blown up, but i don't know much besides that." you told ranboo, being confused as to why this was even important. he stayed silent for a minute, cautious as to what he should say. does he just tell you outright that wilbur had been killed and that ghostbur was his ghost?

‎ ‎ ‎he exhaled again, nervous. "well, wilbur is the one who blew up l'manberg and.. phil killed him after." he said, pausing between his words to see your reaction. your eyes were wide, throat dry. there was a deep pit in your stomach, a neverending bad feeling. "he's dead?" your voice trembled as you spoke, brows furrowed.

‎ ‎ ‎ranboo nodded, sucking in a breath awkwardly. "i'm sorry i had to be the one to tell you." he said shortly, hands clasped behind his back. you tried to shake it off, laugh and tell him it was fine, but no words could come out. "so," you spoke once you had finally grasped your words. "is ghostbur his.. ghost?"

‎ ‎ ‎he nodded again, rocking on his heels. "he doesn't act anything like from what the old wilbur used to, from what i've heard." he tried to confide you, however it didn't do much to help. you smiled weakly at the male, not exactly knowing how to deal with the information as of now. "thank you, ranboo, and uh, no i haven't seen.. ghostbur. i hope you find him though."

‎ ‎ ‎with that, he thanked you and left you alone for now. you shut the door gently before breaking down. you grasped your hair, sliding against the wooden door. he was dead? while you slid against the door, you began laughing. he was dead. you were gleeful. you laughed and laughed and laughed. god, he was dead.

‎ ‎ ‎you didn't know you would ever celebrate a mans passing, but wilbur was different. wilbur was.. obsessive. not only with control, but with you. you always got a weird feeling from him too. he was always with you somehow, always greeting you wherever you would be. he was highly protective of you and, while he passed it off as it due to you being a citizen of his country, you suspected otherwise.

‎ ‎ ‎your gleeful laughter masked the sound of the rustling bushes.

‎ ‎ ‎ranboo hadn't known you didn't know of wilbur's passing. he thought maybe phil or someone else would've told you, not him having to break the news to you. you seemed awfully upset, he hoped you would be okay. as he walked, head down with a friend, there was a thought nagging at the back of his head.

‎ ‎ ‎recently, ghostbur had been acting different. he couldn't put his finger on it, but something was off. he tossed the thought when there was a sudden shout of his name. he turned, quickly, seeing the man of the hour. "hello ranboo!" ghostbur said, smiling warmly at the other. "oh, hey ghostbur." he replied, a soft smile painting his face.

‎ ‎ ‎the two talked for a little while, catching up with each other and seeing how the other was. "well actually, i think i left friend at phil's house, do you mind go getting him for me, ranboo?" ghostbur asked, tilting his head at the half and half boy. ranboo's brows furrowed, wondering why he couldn't go get the sheep himself. it was his sheep after all.

‎ ‎ ‎ranboo glanced back at his house, rubbing at the back of his neck before answering him. "uh, sure, yeah. i can do that! why can't you go get him though?" he asked, confused. he didn't mind going to go get friend, liking to help out his friends, he was simply curious. "oh, i just have something to do! it's nothing really, but thank you again ranboo!" the airy tone of ghostbur coated with delight, he smiled at the man.

‎ ‎ ‎ranboo nodded, wishing him a farewell, before walking away to get more food for the trip. finally. ghostbur smiled, turning to the wooden house you had gone in a few minutes prior.

‎ ‎ ‎he would have you.

‎ ‎ ‎you didn't think that today would be the day you celebrate a dead man, but you learned new things everyday. you didn't celebrate per say, you were just happy the british man wouldn't bother you anymore. he had creeped you out when he was alive, but in death he couldn't do anything.

‎ ‎ ‎knocking at your door had interrupted your moment, brows arching at the door. hadn't ranboo just left? maybe there was something else he had to tell you. as you got closer to the door, hand nearly on the doorknob, you hesitated. why would ranboo come right back? it didn't make sense.

‎ ‎ ‎you put your hand on the hilt of your sword, once again preparing you for if you were to get attacked. yet as you opened the door, there only stood a man ─ a man who looked exactly like wilbur soot. from the hair, to the clothes, to the face shape; it all reminded you too much of wilbur.

‎ ‎ ‎"hello! i'm ghostbur!" the man happily introduced himself, smiling warmly at you. this wasn't how wilbur acted? ranboo had told you that ghostbur acted different from him. "uh, hey. why are you here?" awkward and a tad rude, you asked, narrowing your [color] eyes at the brunette. he only smiled.

‎ ‎ ‎translucent, nearly grey in color hands rose up to wave you off. "i just wanted to come meet you! ranboo had said you were a good person! here, do you want some blue?" fishing in his pockets, ghostbur pulled out a small clump of blue. royal blue in color, it made you somewhat happy to look at it. the corners of your mouth twitched.

‎ ‎ ‎you accepted the blue, gently getting it place in your hand, his fingers brushing against yours as he did so. you squished it some, finding a certain fondness in the way it felt. maybe he wasn't bad. "may i come in?" the ghost asked, tilting his head quizzically. could you trust this guy enough to let him inside your house?

‎ ‎ ‎you pondered the idea, considering the worse case scenario ─ which would really be just takes all of your things or killing you. you doubt he was able to though, he seemed way too nice to even think about it. he seemed trustworthy and so, without another thought, you let ghostbur inside of your home.

‎ ‎ ‎he thanked you and took a look around, complimenting your interior design with a warm smile. he had that aura, the one that makes you feel comforted in his presence. kind and gentle, he was the type of man to be gentle with anything and everything. he seemed rather innocent as well, a child like enthusiasm in the way he carried himself.

‎ ‎ ‎you didn't mind, you actually found it quite admirable. before the war, you had been like that as well. bubbly and warm, smiles that could outshine the sun ─ and now, you were alone, although of your own accord. you had to admit, it was better for it to be like this though. the war and other experiences you shared with l'manberg still haunted your nightmares, causing you to wake up in a cold sweat everytime.

‎ ‎ ‎"[name]," the ghost murmured, looking over the paintings on the wall. "these paintings are quite lovely!" you smiled, agreeing with him. the paintings were nice, as they had been given to you as a president from ranboo. he had magnificent taste, the paintings holding such beauty. you sighed softly, glancing towards ghostbur.

‎ ‎ ‎"hey ghostbur? do you remember anything.. before you died?" you asked, cringing at the question yourself. you assumed it was a question he got a lot, being the ghost of a man who was loved by many, but you couldn't help the curiousity arising in you. he only smiled at you, he always seemed to be smiling.

‎ ‎ ‎"only the good memories! i don't remember any of the bad memories wilbur has!" he answered, still staring at the paintings. he seemed to take a liking to them. you nodded, humming in thought as you glossed over the paintings. "you know," you murmured. "i never really had fond memories with wilbur."

‎ ‎ ‎you had never told anyone of your past experiences with the man, being too scared of being called a liar or saying that you were wrong. wilbur was a man of great charm and charisma, traits he knew how to use to gain what he wants. you knew this first hand, having been on the receiving side of the anger he never showed the public.

‎ ‎ ‎ghostbur was quite for a moment, causing you to look over at him. he seemed deep in thought, eyes nearly wide with a nearly upset look crossing his face. "are you alright?" you asked him, concerned. it would be understandable if he didn't like talking about wilbur, having been the ghost of said man.

‎ ‎ ‎"oh yes, i'm fine! can you tell me about your memories with alivebur?" he asked, looking over at you questionably. you nodded, sitting down on the couch, to where the ghost followed. he sat beside you, almost a little too close for comfort, but he did seem obvious so you chose to let it slide.

‎ ‎ ‎you told ghostbur everything. about how wilbur was a creep. how you suspected he was stalking you. how he had been possessive of you. how you saw a side of wilbur that was never shown to the public. how you never liked him. how wilbur was a deranged man.

‎ ‎ ‎he listened to you quietly, not talking as he stared down at his lap. as you were finished talking, going to ask him if he was okay, he sighed. he shook his head, tsking at you. this was different. confused you scooted away from him, brows furrowed. he only looked up at you, grinning.

‎ ‎ ‎"was my disguise that good?"

‎ ‎ ‎your mouth ran dry. your hands trembled, trembled with fear of the danger lurking in his voice. the madness glinting in his eyes. was this ghostbur? no, this couldn't be. as you stared at him in disbelief, shock coating his features, something started happening. he was melting?

‎ ‎ ‎the grey skin, along with the yellow sweater and beanie, melted off of him. it was like slime dripping, coating your couch in the gooey substance. it disgusted you, how it melted into a puddle of grey just below him. but that was the least of your problem, as the disguise had melted, something sinister lurked below.

‎ ‎ ‎it was wilbur.

‎ ‎ ‎unmistakably, it was wilbur soot.

‎ ‎ ‎the brown hair that bunched up, the dull red beanie atop his head, the brown trenchcoat that coated his features. you backed away, horrified. standing up, you tried to run, yet he only laughed. a sickening laugh that made you stop in place, eyes wide with fear. your feet were glued to the floor, unable to move despite your door beckoning you to run.

‎ ‎ ‎the crazed look in the mans expression would be one you would never forget. he laughed maniacally, grin wide with unmasked enthusiasm. "you really thought it was ghostbur!? that little punk, yeah? you thought wrong, sweetheart!" he shouted, his voice bouncing off the walls, surrounding your every direction, making it impossible to escape.

‎ ‎ ‎who knew you would be trapped inside your own house?

‎ ‎ ‎you could hardly find the words to talk, the phrases getting stuck in your throat as you simply shook your head. it couldn't be wilbur. why was he here? how was he here? the man, who you previously believed to be ghostbur, had been inside your house. you had ranted to him on your troubles with his alive state, unaware he was the one you were speaking to.

‎ ‎ ‎"you- how? how are you - how are you here?" you mustered out, your voice weak. you could barely make them out, quiet and frail. he laughed once more, throwing his head back with unfiltered euphoria. he was so joyous, so content with watching you fall apart in front of him. watching you break down was what he wanted.

‎ ‎ ‎"i always come back, sweetheart, you should know this." he said, smirking devilishly. he walked to you, triumph yelling with every step he took. you backed away as he came closer, fearfully backing away from the brunette until your back hit a wall. alarm coursed through you, desperately trying to look around for a way to leave, a way to escape the misery that would soon come.

‎ ‎ ‎he stalked up to you, stopping in front of you. he was even more terrifying up closer. the broad shoulders and the looming shadow over your figure terrifying you more than anything ever had. "sweetheart!" the pet name rolled off of his tongue, almost in a sing song tone. you hadn't even noticed the tears running down your face until he wiped them away.

‎ ‎ ‎"don't cry, don't cry," wilbur muttered, pulling you closer to him, bringing your scared form into his chest. you tensed, worry clear in your figure as you tried to fight back. you tried to pull away, muttering how you didn't want this. you didn't want wilbur to touch you, to hold you as if he was someone special to you. "why do you keep trying to pull away from me?"

‎ ‎ ‎once you had finally pulled away from him, you looked at him in the eyes. you were still backed up against a wall, knowing your end was nearer than you thought. you glared at him one last time, choosing to pick fight over flight, and spit in his face.

‎ ‎ ‎"fuck you, wilbur soot."

‎ ‎ ‎blood splattered on the walls seconds later.

[shadowsinger11]

You, The Stars And I

Pairing: Fred Weasley x Reader

Word Count: 3.8k (oops)

Requested by @amira3113: Can I request a fic abt the reader seeing Fred and George comforting a kid after Umbridge punished him and the reader helps them and Fred thinks it's so cute what she is doing and she does the same and extra mega fluff, pls?🥺 you don't gotta do it if u don't want to btw.. so no pressure ;)

Warnings: A bit more angst than intended, Fred being a soft boi™️

A/N: I don't know how to feel, I just roasted myself hardcore with this and I'm feeling even more single. I'm sorry for not being able to use a 'keep reading' tab

Masterlist

The sun fell asleep behind the endless hills, enveloped by dense, opaque darkness. Its golden rays no longer shone through the wide windows of the castle and instead let shadows creep into the long, empty hallways, revealing the ugly truth about what the school had turned into over the past few months.

The naked walls stood tall, towering over you and inching closer with every step you took, and you hung your head low, aiming to block out the singular buzzing thought in your head.

Hogwarts was no longer home.

Your heart ached at the memory of hundreds of students chattering and laughing all day long, freely walking around the school grounds and simply being children. You so terribly missed being careless and having fun without the fear of potentially facing a life-threatening punishment.

But now there was no laughter, only your footsteps echoed in the hallway.

You were headed straight to your common room, determined to go to sleep early. The curfew and the dozens of new restrictions prevented you from meeting your friends, and you hoped that sleep would at least somehow distract you from your worries for a couple of hours.

The deafening silence nearly caused you to miss the muffled sobs and quiet whispering, coming from a turn not far away. It seemed as though there were more than one voice speaking, and your chest clenched with dread.

You hurried your pace until you reached the source of the noise, and peeked from behind the wall.

The sight most definitely surprised you, but the pain in your chest only sharpened.

There, on a bench, Fred and George were sitting, hunched over a small boy, probably no older than a second year. You could tell by his green robes which house he was in, but his red, tear-stained face was what alarmed you.

You immediately approached him and fell to your knees. George was on his left, rubbing slow, soothing circles on his back, while Fred was on the other side, holding his small hand in his, on the back of which a few words glistened with fresh crimson blood.

I must not ask questions.

You sent the twins a questioning look, but Fred dismissed it by shaking his head; clearly that was not the time for an explanation, nor was one necessary to begin with.

You placed a hand on the boy's knee to make your presence known.

"Hey. How are you feeling?"

This only caused the child to sob harder and you internally cursed for having to go through this routine.

"It hurts…" he whimpered, "I thought Hogwarts was fun. I met friends last year and it was great. But now… Now I really want to go home."

Your jaw clenched and you swallowed hard, furious about seeing innocent children slowly losing faith and joy in life, turning into hollow shells of the amazing people they could have grown to become.

The horrifying experience would inevitably have a massive impact on them and unexplainable guilt twisted your stomach. And even though the long-term damage had already been done, you could at least take care of the temporary pain.

"It's not going to hurt for long, I promise," Fred whispered, tenderly playing with the boy's trembling fingers. "Ours are already fading."

"That's true, see?" George showed the back of his hand on which you could make out the faint, bloody words 'I must not cause trouble.', and you felt sick. "Soon you won't even remember it was there."

Tears stung in your eyes, but before you gave them a chance to fall, you turned to the redheads.

"I can heal the wound. Well, to an extent. If anything, I can lessen the pain," you began. "But I need to grab something from the Charms classroom."

Fred frowned, confused, "Wouldn't you need a potion for that? Why Charms?"

"Snape isn't the only one armored with potions for just in case things go wrong. And we can't risk going to the dungeons at this hour. It's not wise to tell Madam Pomfrey yet either."

The twins nodded. George said.

"It's not a good idea for all of us to go at once. I suggest one of us returns and covers the others up if necessary."

"I'll go with her," Fred stated without a second thought. "I can get them safely where they need to be, let her do her thing and bring them back."

Fred's eagerness to help filled you with warmth and for once that night you had the strength to smile, even for just a second.

"That sounds like plan then. But you should really take the map," George added, already pulling out the neatly folded Marauder's Map from his backpack. "Don't wanna risk getting caught by the ugly toad, you know."

"As if she'd be strolling down the hallways late at night. Doesn't she have hobbies?"

"Does hanging creepy pictures of cats on pink walls count as such?" you commented and the second year giggled, which made you feel slightly better as well.

Fred took the map from George and you grabbed the boy's hand.

"Good luck, guys. And, like, don't die."

"Woah, greatly encouraging, Georgie," you replied sarcastically, but appreciated it nonetheless. "You sure you'll be fine?"

"Absolutely. I got the route memorized like the back of my hand. I'll be careful."

And with that, George headed towards the Gryffindor Tower while you, Fred and the boy went in the opposite direction - the East Towers.

The night was eerily quiet, only the footsteps and shuddering breaths of the three of you keeping you sane. The soft light, gleaming at the tip of your wands, didn't do much to brighten the empty hallways which now seemed like endless voids of darkness.

Occasionally Fred would warn you about Filch's cat approaching, or Peeves causing trouble nearby, but fortunately, you reached the classroom sooner than expected.

"Alohomora," you whispered, but the door didn't bulge when you tried to open it.

Fred grinned, "Surely a Charms professor wouldn't let such a cliché unlock his own classroom."

"Shut up," you grumbled. "Aberto!"

The door opened. Fred's eyes widened in amusement and you flashed him a charming smile on your way in.

You placed the boy to sit on a desk as you and your friend rushed to look through drawers and chests for something useful. Most of them were full of basic items such as old books and quills, half-full jars of salamander blood, pearl dust and gillyweed, and after long fifteen minutes of not having found anything, you slid your back down against the wall, sighing in frustration.

Sleep-deprivation was kicking in, but your anxiety was getting stronger.

You needed to do something. Fast.

"What about this chest right here?" Fred asked from the other side of the classroom, pointing at something under Flitwick's desk.

You shook your head, "Doesn't open, already tried. Even if the cure is there, we can't get it."

"I take it your brilliant spells don't work anymore?" the redhead teased and you so badly wished to slap away the cocky smirk on his face. Or kiss it. There was something oddly attractive about the way he'd set your nerves on fire, and you hated yourself for enjoying it. Fred seemed to love it too.

"If you're only here to be annoying, just leave."

"I'm here to help too. I can multitask."

You nearly jumped from the ground to strangle him, and he clearly saw through your intentions because his toothy grin almost split his face in two. That bastard.

That super annoying, devilishly handsome bastard.

"Are you gonna keep staring at me, or are you coming? Not that I mind the attention," he shrugged.

You rose to your feet and made your way over to where he was standing, not granting him the pleasure of facing him, "Don't flatter yourself, Weasley. Your stupidity is simply impossible to be unnoticed."

Fred laughed, "Oh, so I was annoying and now I'm stupid too? Make up your mind, woman."

You pulled out your wand and smirked at him over your shoulder.

"You said it yourself that you can multitask. Aberto!"

Nothing.

Fred squinted his eyes as he stared at the wooden chest. What spell could the professor have possibly used? Could you have even heard of it? The chances of ever finding the precious item were becoming grimmer with each passing second and the inevitable sense of dread had started to settle in.

After a minute Fred finally spoke.

"I think your problem is that you're using spells that only work on doors. You need a charm which unlocks containers."

"You might be right. What would that be then?" you enquired, glancing at the redhead. He took his own wand out of his robes.

"I know a spell that's come in handy before. Hopefully it will work now," he wettened his lips and said. "Cistem Aperio!"

Blinding light caused you to cover you eyes,  and the chest opened with a loud thud which could have easily alerted the entire floor of your presence if it wasn't for the silencing charm you were lucky to have used when you first entered the classroom.

You finally dared to open your eyes and kneeled on the ground, carefully rummaging through fancy-looking boxes and vials sparking with liquids that seemed to be quite important.

"What are we looking for?" Fred asked as he crouched next to you.

"Wound-Cleaning Potion. Purple."

It was weird having Fred stand this close to you; sparks of electricity would pierce your heart every time his shoulder brushed against yours, or his fingers would accidentally graze yours. And when they did, they had you longing more and more for their touch, for their warmth.

But this warmth did not belong to you.

You swallowed down the disappointment and instead attempted to focus on the task at hand.

Just as you had expected, the precious crystal bottle was carefully wrapped in sparkling cloth and placed inside a box that was hidden deep in the corner of the chest. You breathed a sigh of relief and got on your feet, determined to stay away from Fred. For his sake and yours.

"Here it is," you smiled at the boy as you walked over to him. "Fred, can you get me some bandages from the drawer in the back?" you asked, pointing right behind him, and he did as he was told.

You took the hand of the young Slytherin and examined it closely - the wound was sure to leave a nasty scar, one that would never heal.

"Can you make it disappear?" he asked, fearfully.

Your heart dropped. But you replied with all the courage you could muster.

"I can try."

Fred was soon by your side and placed the medical items on the desk; a half-full packet of cotton, some bandages and a small box of bandaids. You muttered a 'thanks', not even looking at him, and opened the middle-sized bottle. It spread a characteristic smell of ashes, mint and lemon when you lifted it towards your nose - it was ready to use.

"So what now?" Fred asked.

Not granting him a reply, you simply took a small piece of the cotton and dipped the opening of the bottle into it, soaking it with a generous amount of the purple, dense liquid. The smell grew stronger.

Fred could only watch as you yet again gently grabbed the boy's hand and carefully dabbed the back of it; a thin steam of smoke soared from the contact of wet cotton and wounded flesh, purple mixing with red, and the kid hissed in pain. You worked attentively but quickly, with measured gestures and a straight face, and you missed the way Fred's eyes seemed to soften at the sight of you helping a small kid.

But one thing baffled him - why did you suddenly start acting so emotionless? Even towards the youngling who didn't know a thing. And though your expression seemed calm and collected, the Gryffindor noticed your tensed jaw.

What he wasn't aware of, however, was the racing speed of you heart, increasing each second. He wasn't aware of the short, shallow breaths you were taking because if you had allowed yourself to breathe freely, you'd certainly let out tears along with the deeps sighs.

Every move was calculated, every word and breath.

You pressed a fresh piece of cotton against the now cleaned wound and kept it there as you began to roll the bandage over it, securing it in place. When you were done, you placed a gentle, lingering kiss on the hand.

"There. It should do the trick."

The boy's face lit up and he hugged you, not giving you another choice but to wrap your arms around his small body. At least you had managed to bring him back some of the lost warmth.

"We should get him to his dorm," you told Fred and despite not facing him, he knew the words were directed towards him. That still didn't prevent the stinging pain in his chest from being so effortlessly avoided by you, and he frowned, bewildered by your unexpected coldness towards him.

Had he accidentally done anything to upset you? Were you mad at him? What for?

The boy jumped to his feet, visibly less burdened despite the present tear stains on his puffy cheeks. You hoped he'd be able to get some sleep that night regardless of the circumstances.

The three of you left the classroom as quietly as you had entered it and went in the direction of the dungeons. Fred, as usual, did his job at looking at the map and keeping track of the names, moving on the yellow-ish piece to old parchment.

Fortunately, you reached the Slytherin common room without any disturbances along the way, and the boy went inside, eager to crawl into bed and not think about the ugly lady who had punished him so unfairly just a few hours ago.

The door closed without a sound, leaving you and Fred on your own.

His soft voice broke the burdening silence.

"Are you going to bed?"

If you were being honest, you hadn't even thought about sleep during your secret adventure and though your body was on the verge of giving out, your restless mind was sure to wander all night. And the idea of being alone with your thoughts scared you.

"Actually… I don't think so," you began, fiddling with your fingers in hopes to not let Fred see how much they were trembling. "I doubt I'd be able to get any sleep now."

"Me too, I admit," Fred scratched the back of his neck, uncertain as to how to make the situation less awkward than it was. Trying to get you to talk was hard enough as it was, but your sudden avoidance wasn't helping either. All Fred wished for was to witness the hopeful spark in your eyes, the spark that he had noticed diminish on the first day of school when the unsettling news was announced.

Fred was determined to bring the light back and see your joyous smile again.

Without skipping a beat he said.

"Come with me."

Your eyes shot up in surprise, meeting Fred's for the first time that night. You expected to see the ever-present playful mischief in them, but instead they glistened with something you could not quite recognize. The corners of his mouth had formed a smile, one that didn't intend to mock or provoke in any way, but still contained his usual boyish charm. It was humble and sincere, and along with the anticipating look in his eyes it read.

Trust me.

Your mouth went dry, any and all reasoning to stay vanishing in thin air as you tried to make sense out of your inner conflict. Fred surely wouldn't care if you said no, would he? It's not like he'd be offended that someone like you refused to go with him; why would he even be interested in you in the first place?

But the idea of spending some time alone with him did sound very tempting - you desperately needed some positivity in that moment, feeling exceptionally drained of all your energy after having to witness the emotional and psychological impact of Umbridge's dictatorship. And if there was someone who could lift your spirit even in such dark times, that would be Fred.

Screw the idea of a potential relationship, you needed a friend right now.

"Where to, Weasley?"

Fred grinned at the nickname and shoved hands into his pockets.

"The Astronomy Tower. Are you coming?"

You smiled at him.

"Sure."

It was indeed a brilliant idea to spend the night at the place where anyone rarely ever set a foot. Regardless of it being crowded during classes all day, the Tower wasn't a common choice for students to meet, them much preferring locations like the common rooms, the Great Hall, the school grounds or even the Black Lake. But the Tower did possess a magnetic, obscure charm which many people failed to comprehend and appreciate; charm only meant to lure the wandering souls seeking peace under the stars.

Fred approached the iron railing, breathing in the cold, early spring air, and sat cross-legged on the ground. As he saw you standing a few feet away from him, he patted the empty spot next to him.

"Come on now, don't leave me sitting on my own like that," he joked and his face lit up when he noticed the ghost of a smile on your lips for a brief moment. You joined Fred on the ground, settling on a polite distance from him, and though he was slightly disappointed by the gesture, he was grateful to be in your presence nonetheless.

Silence fell over both of you like soft velvet while you stared off into the horizon; the view reached the Forbidden Forest, the outlines of which had melted into the pitch black sky like ink, the lines between the two practically nonexistent in the dead hours of the night as they blurred into one endless void.

"I don't remember the last time I saw stars on the sky," Fred addressed your ever-listening companions above in a low, hushed voice that caused warmth to blossom within you regardless of the cold surrounding you.

"Me neither," you agreed, nostalgia creeping into you, but you decided you'd welcome it this time. "Such a shame we can't see the moon though."

Your friend nodded, lips pursed into a thin line, "That's because it's currently new moon. We'll need to wait for awhile until it's visible again."

You turned to Fred and the air was knocked out of your lungs. All you could do was silently admire the way the starlight was softening his sharp features and giving his usually flaming red hair a calming shade of copper. His eyes seemed to glow in the dark, and you found yourself coming to the conclusion you had realised long ago.

He was such a beautiful man.

Those glowing eyes landed on yours and you felt your face heat up.

"How are you?" he asked abruptly and you choked out in bafflement.

"Y-You mean, right now? Or in general?..."

"How are you coping?" he rephrased. "You know, with everything going on. I noticed Umbridge bothering you recently."

A shuddering breath.

"I like to think that I'm doing better than others," you nodded hesitantly, finding it hard to sort out your emotions. "I'm more worried about the most vulnerable among us, the youngest students. They're just children. They're the ones that are most terrified. I really hope Dumbledore will be able to do something about it… no matter where he might be right now."

Fred was watching you intently; he did not miss your expression, darkened with concern, nor did he miss your slumped figure, slightly hunched over for a reason he believed was other than exhaustion. Your friend moved closer and nudged your foot with his.

"I don't want you to talk to me about the rest. I want to hear about you. I can clearly see you're being tormented by her."

"As if you're not."

"That's not the point," he insisted and placed a hand on your knee, causing you to face him. His smile was gone. "I need to know how this madness is affecting you."

"I couldn't care less about what that toad puts me through," you shook your head dismissively and shrugged. Why was he getting so worked up about it? "It doesn't matter."

"Of course it does! It matters to me!" Fred hissed in frustration. "Do you think it doesn't hurt me every time I see Umbridge picking at you or calling you for detention? Because it bloody does and you have no idea how horrible it feels to not be able to help you."

He gave your knee a squeeze.

"For once, just for one time, please. Please, stop trying to be the hero of everybody. Believe me, we see- I see how hard you're trying to keep your chin up despite all the shit you're facing, and that's admirable, but right now it's not necessary. Let go. It's just me."

A way too familiar lump formed in your throat and your chest constricted painfully before it harshly dilated, letting out choked breaths. Fred was quick to envelope you in his long arms before your tears even rolled down your cheeks, and when they did, they met his shoulder. Your hands flew around his neck, body falling into his and soaking up his warmth. Fred pressed his soft lips to your temple, calming the racing pulse as you cried freely and unapologetically. Darling, you feel too much.

It's just me.

Your friend didn't let you out of his hold even when your heart-wrenching whimpers were reduced to weak sobs. He continued cradling your exhausted body which was on the verge of completely giving out. But Fred didn't mind, finding astonishing strength in your vulnerability.

After what seemed like hours, you forced yourself to timidly whisper, lip quivering, "I'm scared... And confused."

"Me too, sweetheart," Fred hummed into your ear. "Me too."

You wiped away the trails of dried tears lingering on your face.

"There's just too much going on. Too much that I'm not ready for."

Realization flashed in Fred's brown eyes and they looked down at you with so much longing, sincerity, but also sympathy and understanding.

You weren't angry at him. You were afraid.

And that was alright.

There was enough time, not need for a rush.

Fred had been waiting for years to find out whether his burning feelings for you were reciprocated, constantly suppressing them in fear of scaring you away and losing you. And now that he knew your heart belonged to him like his did to you, all the stars above couldn't contain his untamed happiness, pure and hopeful.

Surely he could wait a little more for you to grow comfortable with your own emotions.

Fred tightened his hold around you and pecked your cheek tenderly, the subtle touch sending a shock throughout your body and subsiding your need for sleep.

"That's alright," he whispered. "Rest now."

@self-ship-love @susceptible-but-siriusexual @hufflexpuff @neovannii

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Masterlist

[dracowars]

forbidden | draco malfoy

pairing: draco x slytherin!reader

word count: 3,6k

summary: where y/n and draco have to endure a very special type of detention

a/n: welcome to my first ever one shot. i hope you enjoy it! please let me know if there are any mistakes.

warnings: none

universe: harry potter

Honestly you weren't really surprised that Professor Snape gave Draco, Harry and Ron detention for nearly blowing up the whole potions classroom when fighting over the ground unicorn horn, an important ingredient for The Antidote to Common Poisons.

But what you weren't expecting was that Snape gave you detention as well, just because you sat in the center of it. Any attempt to convince him otherwise was useless.

And now here you were, in front of Hagrid's hut, the moon shining bright, the only light coming from the hut and your dim lanterns. You'd rather be in any other place you can think of. Everywhere except here. The sooner it ends, the better.

Yet the three idiots next to you still yelled at each other for what already feels like hours. Not even Filch nor Mrs Norris, who escorted you here after curfew, could bear their stupidity any longer, so Mr Filch knocks against Hagrid's door and runs off with a malicious giggle, but not before wishing y'all good luck, of course. You, for your part, could really need it.

"Can't believe I have to spend detention with you again, Potter", Draco spat, his voice full of disgust. The whole day he'd told you about how Harry and him already had detention in their first year at Hogwarts. That time they were lead into the Forbidden Forest and since you are now at Hagrid's hut in the middle of the night, you can already imagine exactly what your detention consists of this time.

Goosebumps spread all over your skin when you only think of the Dark Forest. Yes, you were sorted into Slytherin but that doesn't mean that you can't be afraid. You were, in fact, scared of many things but going into the Forbidden Forest was definetely very high on that list.

Draco noticed your change of behavior while listening to his story of his 11 year old brave self and suddenly had fun frightening you. Not that you were already scared enough of only the thought to go into that damned forest.

Even though he promised to protect you all the way, you were sure that when they were in first year Draco was the first to run and leave the others for death. But he would never admit that and maybe, just maybe, he actually grew up a little bit since then.

You've actually known him since you can remember. Your families, both pureblood, are very close, they even went to Hogwarts together in their time, which let to you and Draco being childhood friends. So when you went to Hogwarts yourself, you were happy to have your best friend by your side and when you got sorted into the same house, Slytherin, you couldn't have been any happier.

Eventually these long years of friendship turned into something more in your fourth year. (Maybe already earlier, you weren't quite sure.) Neither of you wanted to admit it at first but you were meant to be. Anyone could see it from a far. Everyone shipped you since first year and now, in sixth year, you are a happy couple for nearly three years with just a few minor disagreements here and there.

"Ah. The usual suspects", Hagrid mumbles as soon as he spots you after opening the heavy door, Fang, his over-sized Boarhound dog, directly running in Harry's direction. "I don't know why I thought it would be someone else. Feels just like yesterday that we went into the Forbidden Forest, right?"

Hagrid's mention of the Forbidden Forest makes shivers run down your spine right away. This reaction of your body didn't go unnoticed though and you feel the warmth of Draco's body as he scoots closer to you.

Despite Draco's cold demeanor outward, he has a very pleasent warm body temperature. You found out about this feature when you started becoming 'more than just friends' over the years. And now it is hard to imagine life without this warmth.

"I thought getting into sixth year would finally safe us these kind of detentions", Ron whines which Hagrid only response to with a laugh. "No matter what year you are in, Ron, there is nothing more beautiful like an adventurous walk through the forest in the middle of the night. Trust me", Hagrid smiles proudly. "What do we have to do this time?", Harry asks, also not very fond of the idea to go into that forest again.

Even though you were friends with Draco for so long, you actually liked the golden trio. You don't have much to do with them, only a few courses together, but you don't hate them at all. In your opinion they are actually very kind, which Draco, obviously, doesn't approve of.

"Not much, in fact. A creature was hurt last night and I really don't know which one it is. All we have to do is to find the injured creature", Hagrid explains while taking a huge crossbow, leading you right to the entrance of the forest. "Not very challenging, is it?"

"But you do know that there are werwolves in there, don't you? Besides all the other.. dangerous animals that thirst for our blood", Ron complains, while Draco seems to have laid eyes on the crossbow.

"What weapon do we get to defend ourselves?", he interupts Ron's expressed thoughts and points to the weapon, which Hagrid answers to with a sigh.

"You're a wizard. I don't think you need any other weapon than your wand, Malfoy", Hagrid scoffs and goes past him. "Now. Since I'm able to learn from my mistakes, not like others..", he mumbles the last part. "Harry and Ron, you will go this way. Draco and Y/N take the other direction. Please make sure to not hurt anyone or anything."

"A-Anything?", is the last word you hear Ron mumble as you started walking in the different direction. Or more like Draco pulling you behind him into the Dark Forest.

You tighten your black cloak around yourself as you shiver. The Forbidden Forest seems to be even scarier in the night. Even scarier than you expected it to be in general. The only sounds you can hear are your footsteps on the mud, caused by the rainy weather these days, and here and there something that sounds like a very aggressive raven.

"Snape should have just deducted our houses points and not let us go into this dumb forest again", Draco mumbles in front of you while leading the way, not really knowing where to search either. The dim warm light of the lantern he holds up makes his hair shine bright and is the only thing that makes you feel at ease a little bit. Something familiar.

A sudden crack behind you, sounding like a branch that has been stepped on, makes you stop in your tracks abruptly. "What was that, Draco?", you ask, the fear in your shaking voice clearly audible.

"Don't worry about it, love. I'm sure it was just a stupid animal. Let's go on", your boyfriend responds and takes your cold hand in his again.

As you kept going through the tall trees for a few minutes you realize that you've gotten very far into the Forbidden Forest already. All you can see now are trees and not even the moon shines through the dense leaves over your heads anymore. The thick layer of fog around you doesn't make the weird feeling in your stomach better either.

Draco keeps strolling around, searching for any evidence for an injured creature and you turn around, still feeling anxious of someone - or something - following you two.

Your heart stops as the lantern, that Draco held up seconds ago, falls to the ground with a loud crash. Your whole vision goes black and darkness surrounds you. A few bats, startled by the noise, fly away.

"Draco?!", you shout and don't dare to move a single muscle. Your breath is so slow, you don't even know if you're still breathing at all. Another sound is heard from your right and you turn around, only to face more darkness.

"Draco Lucius Malfoy! This is not funny at all! Do you hear me?!", you yell again while getting your wand out of your pocket. Pointing it forward, you quietly say: "Lumos."

As soon as the light erupts from the tip of your wand, blinding you for a brief moment, a white, light-lit face appears right in front of you.

"BOO!", the face shouts directly at you.

You let out a scream, stumble back a few steps in shock and rest your hand against your fast beating heart. The next thing you hear are the echoing laughters of your boyfriend.

"You should've seen your face!", Draco laughs and throws his head back. You swallow heavily and take a few moments to calm yourself down, a tear on the edge of falling. "I hate you so much!", you yell at him and hit his shoulder a few times as anger replaces your fear. "You know exactly how scared I am, dumbass!"

"I could not not take this opportunity, love", he giggles, making the blood in your veins boil. But before you can scold him any further, he stops laughing all of a sudden and his suddenly widend eyes are locked on a point directly behind you. "Y/N.. Don't turn around, okay? Don't move", he whispers and points behind you with a slight head movement.

"I'm not that pathetic, Draco. I'm not gonna fall for that again", you roll your eyes and cross your arms over your chest while turning around. As soon as you did, it feels like all life left your body at once.

Two round yellow eyes, emerging from the sinister undergrowth, are directly fixed on you. A small cone of moonlight falls through the rustling leaves as a slight breeze passes and the creature in front of you turns out to be a werewolf.

Your breath gets caught in your throat as the wild creature comes closer, snarling. "RUN, Y/N!", Draco's loud shout makes you flinch and he grabs your hand, knowing that it is too late to not make any noise, pulling you closely behind him. You nearly stumble over all the sticking out, large roots on the ground but the adrenaline that rushes through your body makes you run as fast as you can.

"Stupefy!", Draco casts the Stunning Spell and shoots it at the creature while running. A jet of red light emerges from his wand but misses the werewolf by a few centimeters. It is now catching up with you even faster than before. "Damn it!", Draco curses.

Your legs already start hurting from how fast you were running. You see a dim light between the trees in front of you and a glimmer of hope runs through you. As you get closer by every second you realize that it's not Hagrid, as you hoped, but none other than Ron and Harry. The confusion is clearly written on their faces.

"RUN!", you tell them, grabbing their hands as you pass them to pull both of them with you. It doesn't take them long to realize what you were running away from.

"Bloody hell!", Ron whimpers beside you and lets the lantern fall to the ground. By now the four of you lost every sense of direction and the only thing that keeps you from giving up is to not get torn into pieces.

Again you take a look back over your shoulder to see how close the wolf has come and in this exact moment of unwariness, you trip over and fall to the ground with a cry. Immediately you try to straighten up but a sharp pain runs through your body and leaves you whimpering in pain.

"Stupefy!", Harry now attacks the beast and actually hits it this time. The wolf falls back a few meters through the air and lands on the ground with a thump, motionless.

"Y/N! Stand up, come on!", Draco helps you up and notices your pained expression. From that moment on your fear is reflected in his eyes. He bends down and frantically picks you up in his arms. Unfortunately, the werewolf has recovered from the spell quickly and is running towards you again, growling and barking dangerously.

But before you can escape this time, another creature that you can't really make out because of the darkness at first, suddenly throws itself on the wolf, fighting a bitter fight with it. You can only stand there and watch in shock.

"Buckbeak!", you can hear Hagrid's voice from the distance and the majestic hippogriff lets go of the much smaller animal, which is now also winzing in pain and then finally leaves you alone.

"What did you do?! How did this happen?", Hagrid scolds you as soon as he arrives, his eyes fixed on Draco immediately. You bite your lower lip to hold back tears as you let yourself sink down from Draco's arms and onto the ground with his help.

"The werewolf attacked us out of nowhere", you explain with a quiet voice and touch your ankle, regretting it right away as you hiss in pain. "It was noone's fault, Hagrid."

"This is exactly the reason why students shouldn't go into the Forbidden Forest, you-", Draco aggressivly starts but you pull on his sleeve, making him look at you. His facial expression softens at your action.

Buckbeak stands close behind Hagrid and observes the situation curiously. Hagrid sighs loudly, his breath becoming visible in the cold air of the night, and pets Buckbeak gently.

"Fine. Let's get you out of here first and then we will look at the damage", Hagrid suggests and Draco and Harry help you stand up again. "I c-can't walk", you hiss after placing your injured foot on the ground, withdrawing it straight away.

"Come here, Y/N. Buckbeak will help", Hagrid waves you over to him and before any second thoughts could cross your mind, you were already seated on the hippogriff's back. While you're still busy with getting comfortable on the creature you unexpectedly feel a pair of hands sneak around your waist closly from behind. Draco had jumped onto Buckbeak as well, with Hagrid's permission of course, and whispers an apology in your ear.

Finally you are able to relax a little while you feel Draco's chest against your back. A cozy warmth emanates from him that has always made you feel at ease and the cold air surrounding you makes it even more comfortable.

With a whistle from Hagrid Buckbeak sets itself in motion and leads you out of the forest, directly back to Hagrid's hut. You had completely lost every sense of time while you were in there. While to you it seems like several hours have passed, it was probably just one.

Draco jumps off in front of the hut and helps you get down, his grip very strong on your hip. You gently stroke over the soft head of the hippogriff and smile weakly at it.

Draco doesn't waste any time and takes you to the warm hut, where he seats you down on one of the chairs and carefully places your leg on his thigh. While watching your boyfriend take care of you so caringly and gently - a side not everyone knows of him - you don't even notice that a few tears finally found their way over your cheeks, which you were able to hold back before. Everything that happened tonight hits you all at once in this moment.

Eventually, Draco's gaze meets yours and he immediately pulls you into a warm, firm and loving hug. "I am so so sorry, love. I shouldn't have scared you. If I hadn't been this stupid, then we wouldn-", he stumbles over his words but you place your index finger on his lips softly. "I'm okay, Draco", you smile at him, even though your ankle doesn't feel anywhere near okay.

"I told Madam Pomfrey what happened and she will be able to heal it quickly, and even though she wasn't very happy that I asked for her help at this hour, she would like to see you at the Hospital Wing", Hagrid tells you as he comes back into his hut, Ron and Harry curiously looking past Hagrid and at you. The guilt is clearly written on Hagrid's face.

"I'm sorry I couldn't help but somehow I just couldn't come up with the right spell!", Ron rants while he and Harry approach you. "How about we help you get into that hospital wing?", Harry offers their help with a smile, which you gladly agree to. Draco on the other hand throws a disapproving look at him, his protective boyfriend instincts very active after what happened today.

Still, he lets Harry help him get you out. Your arms are each wrapped around their shoulders so that you can at least hobble and not have to be carried.

"I will talk to Professor Dumbledore about getting rid of these kind of detentions", Hagrid utters, looking to the ground in shame. Buckbeak senses Hagrid's sadness and lays his head on his arm. Releasing your arm from Draco purposely to tap Hagrid's shoulder soothingly, Draco holds you tightly at your waist in an instant, still afraid that you could lose balance any second and fall again.

"Please don't worry, Hagrid. It's not your fault", you try to cheer him up. "Thank you and also you, Buckbeak." At the mention of his name, Buckbeak turns to you and it almost looks like he actually understood what you said, lowering his head a little as if he would bow.

"I hate to admit it but I guess I have to thank that.. chicken of yours as well, Hagrid", Draco clears his throat. "Thank you for rescuing us."

You know exactly how difficult it is for Draco to thank someone. He rarely does, only because he never really learned how. However, the few times he actually does, you can't help but feel warmer inside. This is what distinguishs him from the evil guys.

With these last words and a nod from Hagrid's side, Draco leads the way into the building and they help you to the first floor, Ron opening the doors for you. You arrive at the Hospital Wing, where Harry and Ron seperate from you and go back to their common room.

Madam Pomfrey treats your sprained ankle and only half an hour later you are dismissed from the Hospital Wing. It feels like you've never hurt yourself in the first place, but Madam Pomfrey still wants you to rest and take care of yourself. Your boyfriend clearly agreed to that and insisted on carrying you back to the Slytherin common room, where you arrived only seconds ago.

It is already so late in the night that not a single soul is in the faint green room, everyone fast asleep for hours in their comfortable beds. You feel exhausted after this eventful night and tiredness is slowly overcoming you.

"Where do you think you are going?", Draco's determining voice asks you with a hint of reproach when you were just about to make your way to the girls' dormitories. "To sleep?", you deadpenned.

"You won't go anywhere except my prefect room. Oh, and you will most certainly not go", he commands and before you know it, you're in his strong arms again and on the way to his room. If the way wasn't so short though, you could have fallen asleep right there in his arms, your cheek on his shoulder and one hand against his warm chest.

Despite telling him that you are fine for the tenth time now, he still insists on taking care of you. He borrows you your favorite sweater of his - although you don't quite understand how it found its way back into his closet because the last time you checked it has been in your room - and softly puts you to bed under the thick dark green covers out of silk.

What you don't know, however, is how much he actually blames himself for what happend tonight. He feels guilty because it should have hit him and not you. After all, he accidentally lured the werewolf into your direction by frightening you. He knew you were scared, you told him before. Nevertheless he thought it was funny to scare you. And now you got hurt because of him.

He climbs in beside you and pulls you closely to him, your arm wrapped over his waist and your head on his chest. He gently runs his fingertips over your delicate skin and through your hair. You feel his steady heartbeat beneath you, softly inhale his scent and close your eyes.

"I love you so much, Y/N. I'm sorry for everything", Draco whispers barely audible and places a kiss on your forehead, then another one on your temple. "I love you too, Draco", you absently smile and put your hand on his jaw, lift your head slightly and then give him a kiss on his chapped lips. "And please stop apologizing, alright? It was not your fault."

You can clearly see that he thinks about whether or not to reply but you beat him to it. "Listen. I don't blame you at all. It was a misfortune, nothing more and nothing less. All I need is your company right now. I need you by my side, Draco. Always", you explain and give him a genuine smile in hopes to make him feel better and to finally stop blaming himself.

He replies with an equally genuine smile and gives you one last kiss before he pulls you even closer, as if he's scared of losing you. Still, after your kind words, he actually feels better now and he smiles to himself when noticing your quiet snoring.

And that night Draco definetely made sure you wouldn't have any nightmares at all.

[soyeahitsmiddleearth]

Multi-Dimensional Pt. 5

 In which you have a genius idea to take these suckers out, you accidentally do something you’re not supposed to, and you take the taller bit of your friends out. 

----

And then, you realize, that it's getting deeper into October.

As it got deeper into October, the dwarves and hobbit remain in your house. It's been a total of 2 1/2 weeks, now, and you can tell they're getting antsy from staying in one place for so long.

Like, around halloween time.

An idea strikes you in the head like a bag of bricks, and right away you realize that you're a genius.

You're sitting on the couch with Bilbo, Oin, and Bofur when the lightbulb goes off in your head suddenly, and once it does you hop to your feet and run upstairs at top speed, successfully baffling everyone idly watching the nature documentary you put on.

You pass Dwalin and Balin while you zoom to your bedroom, and when they see you run past them like freaking Speedy Gonzales they're both super confused.

Right away you grab your laptop off your bed and pull up a window.

The keys of your compute clack softly while you type in your town as well as 'Halloween Festival' and the first few results as well as images on the Google engine prove your theory.

Every year here people dress up in advance and celebrate throughout the duration of the week leading up to it. Of course, the trick-or-treating only happens on the day of, but there are a plethora of other things for people to do during that week.

People dress up, children go on field trips, there's a festival, and even the grocery stores have little events they put on to promote their business.

You've never really gone before since crowded places aren't the most comfortable for you, but you actually feel a little giddy about taking them all to see the town with you.

Right away you know you're going to have to buy them all costumes, but for the last week you've been pet sitting this rich couples Rag-doll cat, Princess, and your going rate is $18/hr for a week... Do the math ;).

You're going to get paid later in the day today after you drop her back off at their house, and that's not even accounting for the other animals you've been watching for varying amounts as well.

So, essentially, you're gonna be perfectly fine financially.

Anyways, as soon as you're done doing your little bit of research there on your computer you close it and leave your room again, hopping down the stairs with a big bright smile on your face.

When you reenter the living room, everyone is gathered there and looking at you expectantly.

At first, you don't do or say anything since you're super confused, but when the silence begins to drag on for too long you ask hesitantly, "Uh... Is everything alright? What's going on?"

"Well, you left to your room very quickly." Bilbo comments, standing up from his spot on the couch, "But from the smile on your face, I'm assuming it wasn't because of anything bad?"

You nod your head and sigh, leaning down to pet Mittens who is rubbing herself against your legs, "Yeah, everything's fine. It's great, actually." You pause for dramatic effect, then add, "I just figured out a way to take all of you out! Like, to see the town and stuff!"

"You have?" Thorin asks, raising an eyebrow skeptically.

"Mmhm!" You stand up straight and nod your head quickly, bouncing on the balls of your feet, "See, I figured I'd probably be able to take you and maybe Kili, Bofur, and Dwalin out at some point... like, if some of you were to groom yourselves different or wear hats...," once more you stop your speech and realize that may be offensive, "N-Not that I think there's anything wrong with how you look-"

"Nobody is offended, I'm sure. Go on." Thorin urges, amusement present on their faces from your sudden frantic backtracking so you don't offend them.

"R-Right, uh... anyways, you guys are taller so I knew I could probably bring you along sometime, but I wasn't sure how to get everyone else to come along, and then I realized that this next week is the week leading up to halloween!" You say it like it will answer all their questions, forgetting that they probably don't know what halloween is.

Silence passes by for a few seconds as they wait for you to go on, and when you don't Kili asks, "What's 'halloween'?"

"Oh, yeah, it's like, a holiday where children dress up and go to peoples houses to get candy. And when I say dress up, I mean in costumes." You rub the back of your neck while you explain and add, "In my city, the place we are now, we celebrate throughout the whole week. There are games, festivals, and lots of events... and there are people running around in masks all of the time. So I can get some of you costumes and then I can bring you all along!" Your smile returns as you pick apart the details, and it seems your excitement is contagious.

"Wait, so we will get to walk around the town and see other things?" Nori questions, looking over at his brothers with a smile.

"Yeah, but I gotta get you costumes first. Like, ghosts and some masks of different things. But if we wanna make the most of our time then I should probably go now."

You turn after that and go to the counter to grab your purse, pausing when Balin asks, "So it's a holiday where people run around in disguises, getting candy, and playing games as a community?"

Once again you nod your head, turning around to look at him with the same bright smile on your face.

"So, anyone can be anyone?" The older dwarf asks, furrowing his eyebrows.

"Yeah, pretty much." You look down and go through your purse, making sure everything you need is in there before walking over to put on your tennis shoes.

"Even the man who was here the week before?"

Now that certainly gives you a pause.

Before you were never worried about it, but now with what's happened with him, you aren't so sure that it's so safe anymore.

"Um... yeah, I guess." You'd rather not think about it, so you start to tie your laces up. "I'm sure it'll be fine."

"Well, you already said that you can bring some of us, so why not do that now? Just to make sure?" Balin asks, though it's more of a 'you should really do it cause we're gonna freak out if you don't'.

You don't respond and instead finish tying your shoes first, thinking over his request.

When you're done doing up your shoes you turn and see that they're all looking at you with similar expressions of worry, and it makes you sigh, "Okay, fine. But whoever goes can't wear their normal clothes cause people will be weirded out. The halloween thing doesn't start for another day."

There's a moment of silence while some of them exchange looks before Thorin speaks, "You mentioned Kili and myself first. Surely that should be fine."

"Um..." You look between the two and tilt your head to the side thoughtfully, arms crossed over your chest. "Sure. But your hair is definitely going to stick out, Thorin."

He nods his head in understanding.

"And what about me?" Kili asks eagerly. It seems he's really excited about finally being able to leave your property.

"You're fine, I think. Am I taking both of you?" You inquire with furrowed eyebrows, walking a few steps forward.

"You might as well." Kili says with a big silly smile.

Well, you can't argue with that logic.

You shrug your shoulders and head up the stairs again, "Alright, go get changed into some of the clothes I gave you."

---

Once they're dressed in t-shirts and sweatpants (you didn't know their sizes so you got whatever would fit at the time) you observe them both with narrowed eyes while rubbing your chin.

"Hm... On a scale of 1 to 10, I give Kili a 9 and Thorin a 6." You say after a moment, turning to look at everyone else and get their opinions.

"What is the scale referring to?" Fili pipes up suddenly, looking up at you.

"How convincing they are."

"Why do I get a 6?" Thorin grumbles, looking at you pointedly.

"Your hair." You reply simply, walking over with a hair tie stretched between your fingers, "Hold still."

You gather his hair over his shoulders and pull it back, putting his hair through it and wrapping it around until it's nice and tight.

As soon as you're finished, you step around him and look to see if it's made a difference, and when you've determined that it's good, you smile, "Okay, now it's at least an 8." You turn towards Kili and ask, "Your hair is fine, right? Or do you want me to put it up?"

He doesn't say anything and neither does anyone else, and when the silence persists you raise an eyebrow, "Hello? Earth to Kili, I just asked you a question."

"Uh, no, you don't have to, thank you." He shakes his head and seems to come to some sort of realization since he starts to smile at his uncle in that big teasing grin you've, unfortunately, become accustomed to.

You nod your head and skip back over to the counter, swiping your keys off of it before heading to the front door.

"Come out whenever, I'm gonna get my car started."

Once you're out of the house some of the dwarves begin to laugh, and Kili pokes fun at his uncle, "Thorin, you have quite a red face, are you sure you can go?"

Thorin glares at his nephew and replies coldly, "She meant nothing by it."

"Right, but is that disappointment I hear?"

The glare he throws his nephew is so withering it could suck the life right out of a flower, but Kili is no flower, so he only laughs more.

"She offered to do yours too, you know." Fili adds when he begins to feel bad for his uncle.

Kili pauses his laughter and glares at his brother, "But she didn't do it."

"She would've."

"Oh hush, you're just upset that she didn't ask to do your hair." Kili shoots back, glaring at his brother.

"I am not, because unlike everyone else, I knew she meant naught by asking." He shoots back with a smirk.

Kili huffs indignantly and glares at his brother, saying no more as he heads out the door after you.

Thorin turns to everyone before following and states, "Try not to destroy anything while we are gone." His voice is firm and he waits until he gets nods from them all before leaving after you.

---

Once you're all in the car you put it into drive and go, turning up the radio so the car won't be completely filled with silence while you drive.

Occasionally, you'll glance at Thorin in the passenger seat or Kili in the back, and each time you do they're looking out the window at the passing scenery with awe.

"If you're impressed now, wait until we get into the big city." You comment suddenly, smiling to yourself while you watch the road ahead.

And when you do arrive in the city, they are impressed indeed.

The gasp that leaves Kili when you drive through the first big street draws a giggle from you, and when he presses his face against the window as you pull into the parking lot of the seasonal halloween store, your smile grows even bigger.

Even Thorin is impressed by all the wonderful things around, and when you turn off the car after parking you turn to look at them, "Thoughts so far?"

"It's wonderful." Kili breathes, looking at the bright, moving signs and huge stores all around.

"Yes, I don't believe I've ever seen anything so grand before." Thorin agrees, looking over at you with a smile of his own.

"Well if this impresses you, wait until we get inside the store. Try not to get scared."

---

The three of you eventually make it inside, and when you do they are in awe once more.

The seasonal store is dark with black painted walls and bright white florescent lights, and there are various halloween and horror things everywhere.

When you walk in there is one of those electronic jump-scare things, and while you were expecting it, the poor dears behind you weren't.

The witch thing pops out and cackles loudly, saying one of her many phrases, and as soon as she does both Kili and Thorin freak out. And when I say freak out, I mean 'pulled out some small weapons they decided to bring and screaming' freak out.

Luckily there is no one around at the moment, so you step between them and the witch and laugh nervously, "Put those away please. We're gonna get kicked out if anyone sees you with those."

They look between you and the electronic woman a few times before slowly putting their knives away and relaxing their stances.

"Thank you..."

"What is that?" Kili asks, glaring at the ugly jump-scare machine while you walk past it.

"It's a halloween decoration designed to scare people. And it seems like it worked too." You reply easily, looking back at them with a more mischievous smile.

Kili looks around slightly nervously and grumbles defensively, "I wasn't that scared... Uncles screams are what startled me."

"My screams? Kili, let's not lie now, clearly you were horrified." Thorin says disapprovingly, shaking his head.

"Aw, you guys are cute." You purr jokingly, waltzing up to the kids costumes isle.

They stop arguing after that.

You browse through the messy shelves quietly for a little while, trying to find the best ones, when you see a doggie in the cutest ghost costume.

A squeal leaves your lips when you see the cutie pie and you cup your cheeks as an adoring expression comes onto your face.

Without hesitation you hop over to the owner and ask excitedly, "Where did you get that?"

The man with the dog looked up quickly upon hearing your excited yelp and when he saw your exuberant form he smiled too, "I bought it a week ago here. They're near the back."

His answer fills you with joy, and you continue to stare at his pupper for a moment before he says, "You can pet her if you want, she doesn't bite."

He doesn't need to tell you twice.

You kneel down right away and scratch behind her ears, and her tail begins to wag wildly at the attention.

It seems that she likes you just as much, because she takes a seat and leans into you when you scratch her all over like you do with your dogs. It's at that moment when you begin to wonder if she'll fit in your purse.

Before you can finish your calculations and plans on stealing this mans dog you hear someone clear their throat and you realize then that you forgot all about Thorin and Kili.

You turn your head and see the two of them standing there with amused expressions on their faces.

Upon realization that they're watching you, and have been for a little while now, you jump to your feet and feel your face heat up. "I-If you make fun of me I'll leave both of you here." You threaten very unconvincingly, crossing your arms over your chest.

Kili starts to laugh but he doesn't say anything about it, looking at his uncle who also releases a few chuckles of his own.

You glance back at the man and see that he's looking at them, and you realize he probably thinks Kili's short stature is a little odd.

"U-Uh, thanks for letting me pet your dog!" You say quickly, heading back over to the two of them with a blush on your cheeks.

You turn back to the shelves of costumes and the man and his dog walk away, and once their gone you glare at the two of them half heartedly. "You guys are total meanies." There is faux bitterness in your voice when you speak as well, and it only brings more laughter from them.

"I only find it cute." Kili states, smiling good naturedly before continuing, "Every time you see an animal you get very excited."

"Cause I love animals."

"Yes, we can tell." Thorin muses, stepping up next to you to look at the spiderman mask in your hand.

You tap your foot against the ground a few times before putting the mask back.

A ghost costume for Bilbo; check.

That is all.

You literally don't have anything for anyone else, and honestly you're beginning to think that it's impo-

And then another idea hits you.

Class of middle/high-schoolers in a fantasy club. It's farfetched and barely believable, but most people won't say anything about it out of fear of being offensive, so it's perfect!

You don't have to buy them costumes at all (minus Bilbo), all you need is stuff to make them look less like dwarves and more like children pretending to be dwarves.

It sounds easier than it actually is, but you think you can pull it off. All you need is some netting, makeup, wigs, and nose and scar wav and you'll be set.

Once you get this idea you run away from the kids section with the ghost section and head toward the halloween makeup isle, seeking out the items mentioned previously without hesitation.

You find what you're looking for in minutes, and once you've got everything you zoom to the checkout since you're going to need to look up some tips on how to pull this off.

You're so excited you nearly forget to make sure Kili and Thorin are still with you, but once you see them you smile in relief and pay for everything.

Once you're all back in your car, Thorin asks, "I thought we were going to get masks?"

"Well, we were. But then I had an amazing idea consisting of pretending you're all students or something who invested in really expensive dwarf costumes. It's perfect, 'cause no one will ask and we'll get lots of compliments."

Thorin nods his head slowly and puts his belt on like you showed him, but before you go you turn and look at Kili expectantly.

The young dwarf doesn't say anything at first, but when your staring consists he asks slowly, "What...?"

"Put on your seatbelt."

There's more silence until he puts it on, raising an expectant eyebrow at you, "Is that better?"

"Much."

[fbfh]

Connor Stoll dating headcanons

1.1k words

Gender neutral reader

I'll add the read below once I'm off ~mobile~

I might reference my dating Travis post a little so if you haven't read it yet here's the link

Since Connor is the younger brother he's obviously gonna have more of that 

What's the word

Crackhead energy

He also has a little more of a baby face

Which is just fucking adorable

His hair is shorter on the sides too

Like go much shorter and it's basically an undercut

They practically have their own language of inside jokes and references and stuff

The longer you're around them the more you start to pick up

Connor's so proud when you get references without having to explain 

He absolutely will not date someone if Travis doesn't like them

Thankfully Travis sees how much Connor likes you and goes easy on you

Connor is a non stop bad idea machine

I hope you're ready to act as 60% of his impulse control

He likes climbing trees with you

"I will never be to old for this"

Just sitting

Existing together in the foliage 

Will absolutely make "y/n and Connor sitting in a tree" jokes as an excuse to kiss you

An absolute imp of a man

Like if you didn't know better you would think he's some sort of trickster fairy boy like Puck

Constantly on the verge of pulling some bullshit

Speaking of Puck

I feel like he likes a midsummer nights dream a lot

He doesn't talk about it much though

[John Mullaney voice] that's the thing I'm SENSITIVE ABOUT

Like he’s seen all of the film adaptations 

And has very strong opinions on all of them

When he found out that fairies and nature spirits were real he almost shat himself 

Quotes it under his breath sometimes 

He doesn't bring it up for a long time

Like he barely even talks to Travis about it

But when you've been together for a while you'll eventually find out how much he loves it

You quote it back to him sometimes 

It always makes his heart happy 

Loves going thrifting with you

Please look at anything from the blog shifty thrifting 

Because that's the kind of weird shit you two find together 

Make sure to hold his hands a lot

It helps with the whole accidental theft thing

This goes without saying but like

Prank🗣wizard🗣

The last summer before Travis started college 

Connor grabs you at like 9pm and shoves you into the bathroom

You're like woah there tiger

He holds up a shopping bag and has that look on his face

"I got wind that Travis is planning to dye my hair green as an end of summer prank, but I'm beating him to it"

You're about to point out that dying Travis's hair green days before he starts college is probably not the best retaliation

Before you can he rips open a box of platinum blonde dye and hands you a pair of gloves

"He can't dye my hair green if I beat him to it"

You spend like two and a half hours getting his hair from his warm chestnutty brown to Billie Eilish neon green

You can hear the laughter and yelling from Hermes cabin past midnight when Travis pulls down his brother's hood

And Connor, without opening his eyes, whispers

"Too slow, man"

The camp fucking riots over that for the next week

Easily one of his most legendary pranks he's ever pulled

He has a lot of that "your cool wild free spirited manic pixie dream boy boyfriend from high school" energy

Expect a lot of rooftop picnics

Mostly with takeout 

And lots of kissing 

But who's complaining 

"Take out and make out" - Connor probably

He finds stuff that makes him think of you 

And he wants to give it to you

But he is the most awkward gift giver e v e r

He usually just tucks presents here and there and waits for you to find them

Like an affectionate raven

“That’s a nice necklace,” 

“Yeah thanks, it’s one of my favorites”

Neither of you bring it up but you both know how much it means 

So Travis is at college learning psychology 

And Connor's really proud of him

But it sometimes gives him this bad feeling in the pit of his stomach when he remembers his brother has it all figured out and he doesn't 

It makes him feel bad about all the goofing off he does

He brings it up to you at one point 

His head is on your stomach and you're watching the stars 

Your fingers move to play with his hair while you take a second to collect your thoughts

"I mean, you can't really hold yourself to that standard, Con. He has had three more years to think about this stuff,"

"I know, I feel like I'm just so far behind,"

"You're not behind, you're younger. That's not a bad thing. Plus, that youthful glow you still somehow retain makes you so good at connecting to the younger kids at camp. That's really important."

He breathes out a laugh as he realizes you're right

"I mean, just last week I saw Emma and Harley trying to short sheet Nyssa's bed!" 

"Seriously? Emma and Harley?"

He laughs more at the idea of Nyssa getting short sheeted 

Emma had been so shy and withdrawn since she'd come to camp

It was really hard to get he to participate in camp activities and training, and Chiron was a little worried 

Something kind of clicked for Connor that night

A few years later when he would have aged out, he talked to Chiron about being a year round councilor 

Chiron agreed enthusiastically, and the number of little demigods coming out of their shells faster and faster rose every year

He sometimes lets younger kids call him Connie, which never fails to make them giggle

He kissed you once in front of a group of elementary school aged kids practicing with wooden swords and you couldn't help laugh at the chorus of "EEEEEW"s that errupted

You both sometimes go eeeew! After you kiss and it never fails to make you laugh

Tldr; Connor Stoll is so sweet?????

How did he get to be such a loving boyfriend????? 

We may never know

But we'll have fun on the way

You always do with him

[simpcircus]

Broken Promises

Warning(s): Angst, character’s death, squint for fluff Word count: 4.8k A/N: First JJBA content let’s goooo ♡ ♡ I hope it’s decent and feedbacks are appreciated!

Drops of rain carrying shattered hopes and promises streaked down your skin to your quivering lips as you stood under the gloomy clouds, alone with your memories of him;

Kakyoin Noriaki.

How long has it been since you last saw him? Counting the days of his absence is something too painful for a mere human like you to do. You remember the way his lips stretch into a sickeningly sweet smile everytime he sees you. You remember how his stunning amethysts-for-eyes were rimmed with long dark lashes that would brush his cheeks everytime he closed his eyes. Suffering, longing, loneliness; his eyes held all those deep seated emotions despite how bright his smile looked like every time he’s with you. 

No matter how hard you tried to understand him and how he truly feels, there always seems to be an invisible wall blocking you from doing so. You tried. You really did - but it was useless. Beneath his polite smiles and warm gaze, there seemed to be a hidden layer that you couldn’t reach. 

“Hi! You’re Kakyoin Noriaki right?” The voice of your younger self echoed in your head as you recalled an old memory. The day was postcard perfect outside when you first approached Kakyoin. You still remember how shut off from the world he was back when both of you were younger. 

Everytime you saw him in your class, the red haired boy was always sitting at the back, his mind elsewhere as his gaze drifted outside through the window. Unlike the other kids in your class, there was oftenly a gloomy aura surrounding Kakyoin as he sat with his own company. You will always find the boy with his head tilted down as he avoided eye contact, his lips tightly shut. 

You were only met with silence as a response from the redhead after attempting to start your first conversation with him - but that doesn't mean you're going to give up on trying to befriend Kakyoin. Call it sheer will and child naivety, you didn't even feel discouraged when he barely showed any interest in pursuing a friendship with you at first. If anything, it only motivated you to try harder and at some point, he started warming up to you. 

“Good morning Kakyoin!” You would cheerily greet him every morning in class just to see the small sparkles in his eyes as he looked at you, dumbfounded. Volunteering to pair up with him for assignments when no one approached him has become the norm for you and sitting beside him during lunchtime was something that you would do out of habit. 

As time passed by, your friendship with Kakyoin was eventually established and you were glad that he wasn’t as distant as he was before around you.

One of your most memorable moments with him was when you discovered his love for cherries. It was a fine day under the radiant sun, gentle warmth from the brilliant rays hitting your skin as you sat near Kakyoin, a small box containing a slice of cherry flavoured cake sitting on your laps. 

It was a simple looking slice of cake, with alternating layers of cherry curd and vanilla buttercream, and then decorated with frosting and a cute red cherry to top it off. He was eyeing the little fruit that was left untouched on your cake the whole time you were eating and you were quick to offer him the cherry.

“You can have it if you want, Kakyoin” As soon as you said that, Kakyoin’s facial expression brightened and it was the first time you’ve ever seen him being genuinely happy about something. His lips broke into a grin as he thanked you before indulging himself with the cherry, his eyes sparkling once again. 

From that day onwards, you always reminded yourself to bring a small box of cherries to school for him.

Another moment with the redhead that you would never forget was when you dragged him to your house to play video games together. Your father had bought a new video game for you and knowing how much Kakyoin loves to play video games, you just had to invite him to join you. There’s no way you’re going to play the new game without him. 

The evening was filled with delightful laughters, and fun childhood memories with him were made. When the day almost came to an end, Kakyoin fell back into silence but this time, it wasn’t unpleasant. A warm smile graced his lips as he looked at you, his mouth uttering two sentences that made your heart flutter.

“Thank you for being my friend, (y/n). Let’s stay together forever.”

It was so sudden and the sincerity in his words caught you off guard, causing your little heart to pound wildly in your chest as a light blush covered your cheeks. It was at that moment when you truly noticed how stunning his violet eyes are. It was at that moment when you realized why his presence was so magnetic for you. It was at that exact moment when you finally understood your own feelings;

You have a crush on Kakyoin Noriaki.

Things weren’t the same for you anymore ever since that day. You began stealing glances at him during class, your face would blush at the smallest friendly gesture made by him and the teacher would catch you daydreaming about your little crush in the middle of a class which then resulted in you getting sent to detention - though Kakyoin will always be there to voluntarily accompany you by purposely getting himself into trouble. 

Keeping your cool in front of him became harder the more you spent time with him. However, you kept telling yourself that it was just a silly little childhood crush that will eventually go away as you grow up.

You were wrong though. 

The feelings won’t go away no matter how hard you tried dismissing them. You ended up having to transfer school due to personal reasons and lost contact with Kakyoin, never hearing from him ever again. It was painfully hard for the both of you at first, but you eventually grew out of it - or at least that was what you kept in mind for false comfort. ‘Kakyoin probably has gotten over our friendship by now..’ you thought, a bitter smile showing on your lips as you moved on with your life.

Years passed by rather quickly and you’re now a highschooler.

News of having a transfer student in your school has been spreading around and it was the only thing everyone was talking about for the past few days. They were all so curious about the new student and a few girls who claimed to have seen him before were completely head over heels for him.

While everyone was excited to welcome the transfer student, you, in particular, paid no attention to the hype. However, your indifference towards the transfer student’s arrival immediately changed as soon as you found out that it was actually Kakyoin Noriaki; your long lost best friend and childhood crush.

Kakyoin has grown up to become a handsome young man. He was truly mature for his age - his composure was always kept together and his naturally reserved demeanour has made him seem more level headed than his peers. The redhead was much more confident to be compared to his younger self, but there was something about him that had bothered you. 

He was behaving distantly around you when you approached him, as if he barely knew you and it made you feel like you’re back to square one.

“Kakyoin?” Your voice wavered. Both of your hands were clasped while your heart beat wildly, just like how it did years ago when he thanked you for being his friend. Your legs almost gave out when the redhead finally turned his head towards you and met your gaze. You were scared, but you couldn’t pinpoint what you’re actually scared of. Was it rejection? Or maybe you’re just nervous because you haven’t seen each other for a very long time.

His white scarf swayed lightly in the cold breeze, his eyes still held the same brilliance from your childhood memories of him - but there was something that made his gaze appear colder than before as he looked at you instead of the canvas in front of him. 

His lips were formed into a thin line as he kept staring at you in silence, and you started to feel uncomfortable under his gaze. Was he angry that you left him? Did he hate you now? Does he even recognize you? You couldn’t tell.

“It’s been a long time, Kakyoin. I miss you- and our friendship, of course.” It would be a huge, pathetic lie to say that you don’t miss him. Your heart was aching for him every second ever since the day you were separated from Kakyoin. Everyday, you have this hope where you’ll get to reunite with him by fate - be it stumbling across each other in a random street or perhaps meeting him at a cafe as an employee. 

You’ve always told yourself that you would confess about your feelings if life gave you the chance to meet Kakyoin again but now that he’s right here standing in front of you, you’re tongue tied.

God, you desperately wanted to tell Kakyoin how much you love him but something in your mind held you back. ‘Do I even have the right to confess about my feelings after not seeing him for years? Won’t it sound weird?’ You knew it wasn’t your fault that you had to transfer schools and you’re probably being overdramatic at the moment but you couldn’t help it. 

It felt like forever before Kakyoin finally responded, his facial expression was quick to change as he flashed you a polite smile. “Nice to meet you again. You’re (y/n). Aren’t you?” Kakyoin’s voice was just as charming as it was years ago, but deeper, and it caused a wave of nostalgia to wash over you. His reaction was as calm as you’d expected him to be. However, something felt off about him. 

‘Maybe I’m overthinking it..’ You shook off your thoughts before proceeding to try and spark a conversation to catch up on your lives. 

“As much as I would love to talk, I’m afraid I don't really have the time (y/n).” You had no idea that he could effortlessly break your heart with just a few words. It was a challenge to hide your disappointment as you forced out a smile for him. You can tell that he’s truly apologetic with the way he looked at you so you forced yourself to temporarily put your disappointment aside.

“It’s alright. We can always catch up later when you’re free right?” You noticed the way his gaze was immediately directed towards someone a few feet away behind you, his eyebrows slightly furrowed as if there was business to be done with whoever he was looking at. Out of curiosity, you turned your head to follow his gaze and saw Jotaro Kujo walking with a bunch of heart eyed girls tailing him. “That’s Jotaro Kujo. He’s in my class. Do you know him, Kakyoin?”

Kakyoin shook his head before returning his gaze back at you. “No, I believe I don’t. I’ll get back to you once I’m free (y/n). See you later.” He flashed you his usual polite smile before walking away towards the same direction Jotaro took, leaving you to stand by yourself. 

You were left speechless after the encounter with your long lost best friend and disappointment began seeping back into your chest as you quietly turned to look at Kakyoin’s back. You had to admit that you’re a little mad at your best friend for just simply dismissing you after years of not seeing each other. 

‘Calm down, (y/n). He told you that he’s busy. He surely didn’t intend to offend you or anything.’ You let out a small sigh before shaking your head to calm down. Kakyoin did tell you that he’ll be reaching out later, so you’ll just have to wait. Waiting shouldn’t be hard, right?

You didn’t see him for the rest of the day and there was an attack in the nurse’s office - which had forced students to stay in class. The teachers assumed that there was an unknown gas explosion but no one can really tell the true cause of the incident. It was a relief to hear that she was still alive regardless of her severe injuries. You would even call her lucky, even, since most people would’ve died if they got the same injuries as hers. 

By instinct, your gaze drifted over to Jotaro’s empty desk at the back of the class and you couldn’t help but to wonder where he went. ‘I thought he was on his way to school this morning..’ A small voice echoed in your head as curiosity began filling in your mind. Jotaro was well known for being a delinquent in the school and you knew for a fact that him skipping school is old news. 

However, it was a little odd that he wasn’t in the class after seeing him near the school this morning. ‘Maybe he changed his mind and ended up skipping.’ you quietly hummed to your own conclusion, hoping so that your classmate wasn’t harmed wherever he was.

The next day, you decided to walk the same road you took yesterday just in case you're lucky enough to see Kakyoin again. Much to your disappointment, the redhead was nowhere to be seen and you were once again let down by your own hope. You subconsciously bit your inner cheek out of slight frustration and was about to walk faster to school before a hand caught you by the wrist, causing you to instinctively pull your hand away by force to hold up your trusty pepper spray out of defense.

“Whoa calm down (y/n)! It’s me, Kakyoin” Your childhood best friend quickly held both of his arms up, slightly backing away for you to maintain a safe distance from your deadly spray. It took you a few seconds to get back to your senses and recognize that it was Kakyoin, and your mood instantly improved for the day. 

Your lips stretched into a bright grin but it didn't stay for long when you saw the bandage wrapped around his forehead. “What happened to your forehead?” The obvious worry in the tone of your voice caused him to smile gently before shaking his head as a response.

“I got into a small accident yesterday. Sorry for worrying you, (y/n).” Kakyoin sounded slightly different today. His tone was gentler and warmer while his gaze was soft as he looked at you rather fondly. The change of behaviour caused your stomach to flutter, reminding you of your feelings towards him. 

“You really should be more careful Kakyoin. I just don’t want to see you get hurt that’s all.” Your hand brushed over his bandage, careful enough to avoid hurting him by accident. At that moment, Kakyoin was silent as he stared at you - as if he was contemplating on his next words. There was a subtle nervousness in his gaze that was still on you while you pulled away your hand. 

“What is it Kakyoin? You looked like you got something to say.” Your words managed to bring him back to reality and you could almost imagine the gears in his head turning to muster up a response. It took a while for him to consider his words, but Kakyoin reminded himself to not take too much time since he didn’t want to cause you to be late for school. 

“(y/n), I’m sorry if I acted distant yesterday. I wasn’t in the right mind.” A small frown was visible on his face and you only proceeded to shake your head. Sure, he disappointed you yesterday but at least he was really apologetic about it.

“Hey it’s alright. Don’t worry about it.” You let a smile show up in your facial expression as an attempt to assure him that you’re fine. It’s not that you could stay mad at Kakyoin for too long anyways. His frown changed into a small smile and he was back to being silent. The both of you kept staring at each other, not uttering any word as you got yourselves lost in each other’s eyes. 

It took months for Kakyoin to finally realize his crush for you, and it was a shame that you already left by the time he figured his feelings out. The redhead recalls how he practiced hardly to confess to you years ago. 

The boy envisioned a perfect day for his confession - delicate cherry blossom petals gently falling to the ground around the two of you as he tried his best to avoid stuttering in his words while struggling to hold back his blush in front of you. It was the perfect scenario, but his hope crashed and burned when he remembered that he probably would never get to see you again. 

Now that he was standing right in front of you, he was just as tongue tied as you are, especially after seeing how breathtaking you have grown to be.

For now, Kakyoin has to put aside the plan for his confession - much to his dismay.

“I won’t be at school for a while.” He finally broke his silence, shocking you with the sudden announcement. It was only his second day, yet, he was already skipping school. 

“Where are you going?” 

“Egypt. There are important things that need to be done.”

Egypt? His answer only opened the door to more questions, leaving you in complete confusion. “Alone?” You were filled to the brim with your own curiosity and Kakyoin shook his head to your question.

“I have a couple of friends with me, so, no. I’m not alone.” 

Suspicions and theories began swirling in your head, and one of them happened to slip from your lips - which only caused him to widen his eyes in surprise at how you managed to catch up on so quickly. “Is it stand related, Kakyoin?”

You knew nothing about how these so called stands work, but something tells you that whatever Kakyoin’s about to get himself into, there’s a high chance that it won’t go too well. Your eyebrows slightly furrowed when he looked away, somehow confirming your suspicions. Your heart desperately wanted to stop him from going, but you simply couldn’t bring yourself to do so. You knew your place and you’re aware that you’re not in the right position to tell him what to do for many different reasons.

One of them is that he’s a stand user, unlike you.

You remember how he opened up to you about his inner conflict years ago. The sole reason for his loneliness was because no one could see his stand and truly understand him - and this includes you. 

Despite how hard you tried to make him feel fully understood, you knew that your efforts probably wouldn’t do much for him because just like most people, you couldn’t see his stand. However, everytime you apologize to him for not being able to make him feel less lonely and understood, Kakyoin would just shake his head disapprovingly and remind you that everything you had done for him is something that he will never forget.

He will always try to prove you wrong whenever you feel like you’re not enough.

“Jotaro too?” Another question left your lips as soon as your dark haired classmate entered your sight, walking towards your direction with his hat concealing the upper part of his face. He made sure to maintain some distance just so that he didn’t interrupt anything personal between you and Kakyoin by accident.  

“We’re leaving now Kakyoin.” Jotaro spoke, disinterested with whatever your discussion with Kakyoin was about. At least he’s considerate enough to wait a little bit longer instead of just pulling your bestfriend away from you.

Kakyoin quietly looked at you and he was taken aback at the supporting small smile on your face. He could see the pain in your eyes but your smile has become his motivation to win this upcoming war in Egypt.

“I would be lying if I say that I’m not worried about you, Kakyoin, but this is important and personal for you so I won’t get in your way.” You pushed yourself to restrain your tears before reaching out for his hands and hold them up in a supportive manner. “I trust you. I know you’ll return safely.” 

“Thank you, (y/n). I’m thankful that I have you in my life.Truly.” Kakyoin spoke softly, his grip on your hands were tight, yet gentle - as if he was afraid that he would break them if he held too tightly. 

A small part of your anguish for having to be separated from him for the second time was soothed with the way his thumbs caressed the skin of your hands to comfort you. “Once this all ends, I’ll return immediately and there’s something I’ve been meaning to tell you for so long. Please wait for me (y/n).”

“Of course I will. I’ll always wait for you, Kakyoin.” Always. 

Kakyoin looked less troubled after listening to your reply, before his eyes widened by a fraction upon remembering something important. “Another thing, please don’t tell anyone about this no matter what happens. Alright?”

Letting out a light chuckle, you let go of his hands and showed him your pinky finger. “Sure, but only if you could promise me three things.”

“Elaborate?” It was his turn to become confused.

“One, promise me that you’ll take good care of yourself while in Egypt. Two, don’t be too hard on yourself if things don’t go the way you wanted them to be. Three, stay alive.” 

“Deal.” Memories of your childhood rushed into his mind when Kakyoin linked your pinky fingers together. The two of you used to do this whenever a promise was made, and to remember about it made his heart feel warm. “I’ll keep my promises” The way he grinned was so assuring and none of you were suspecting the tragedy that will soon befall on him.

Weeks became months and you kept waiting for Kakyoin’s return. You got more anxious the longer you wait, various thoughts of negative outcomes haunted your mind every second while you’re awake. What if he didn’t come back? What if something bad happens to him? It was hard to think positively and remain hopeful for his safe return but you didn’t give up. Despite how scary the whole situation was, you kept holding onto your feeble hope that he’ll be back in one piece.

Instant relief entered your chest when you saw Jotaro back in school - but there was nothing more horrifying for you when your classmate stayed in silence after you asked about Kakyoin. The look of grief in his face and the way he tilted his hat downwards to hide his eyes said it all - Kakyoin didn’t make it.

It almost felt like your heart had stopped while the world around you collapsed, crumbling into dust. 

You wanted to cry, scream and punch someone to let it all out, but you can’t. Your body was frozen from all the sudden intense grief and despair that have washed over your senses. Every inch of your body was in pain, desperately rejecting the horrible news despite knowing that it is, indeed, reality - and there was nothing for you to do to change it. You couldn’t rewrite reality no matter how bad you wish you could.

“No..” It was the only word that you could utter at the moment due to your current state, your voice cracked while your throat burnt. How cruel can life be? All you wanted was just to be with Kakyoin again and create more meaningful memories together. Is that too much to ask for? What did you even do to deserve this?

A painful chuckle left your lips after another long moment of silence, your eyes brimming with tears that were threatening to spill out. This can’t be real right? This must’ve been a terrifyingly realistic nightmare that you’ll wake up from soon. This can’t be real. 

You’re not ready to lose Kakyoin yet.

Shaking your head, you immediately pinched yourself as hard as you could, your fingernails digging into your skin only to leave bruises and fresh wounds. “This must be a dream. A really bad one..” Those words were the only thing you repeated on your lips as you kept pinching yourself as an attempt to escape this atrocious fate - yet there you were, still trapped in the living nightmare and your fingernails were covered by your own blood.

It was at that moment when light became shadows - your mind desperately called out for him but it was useless. Kakyoin was truly gone.

You didn’t step out from your room for days to mourn over his death. Your pillows were soaked with tears and your limbs felt heavier than they usually did. You kept crying until there was nothing left inside, but a raw emptiness that nibbles at your consciousness. The sun still shone in the vast sky but not for you as there was no beauty left in the world after Kakyoin had taken his departure.

The faint sound of thunder brought you back from your endless trail of memories, raindrops have completely soaked you from head to toe. It was cold, but you couldn’t bring yourself to step forward and find yourself a shelter to protect yourself from the heavy rain. It’s not that you cared much if you’ll get sick from being under the downpour for too long. It has been almost two weeks since you last stepped outside, but you don’t even realize how fast time flies.

‘Will the rain wash my pain away?’ A thought crossed your mind as you closed your eyes, your head tilted upwards to face the grey sky. Life seems to hate you that much, huh? 

“E-excuse me miss” A childish voice grabbed your attention and you looked down to see a little boy in a raincoat holding an umbrella. His huge eyes sparkled with curiosity as he stared at you, probably wondering why an adult like you were standing in the rain without any protection from the rain. Crouching down to his level, you mustered out what energy you had left for a small smile before letting out a gentle questioning hum.

Now that you could see him better, you started to take notice of the boy’s luscious red hair and violet eyes. Whoever he is, the boy strikes a resemblance to Kakyoin but you were quick to shrug the thought off.

“My mom told me that you’ll get a cold if you stand in the rain for too long.” There was a hint of worry in his eyes as he spoke and his concern for a random stranger like you caused your lips to stretch into a wider smile. Maybe there’s still a little bit of kindness left in life despite how cruel it could be.

“I have a raincoat on me and uh.. Y-you can have my umbrella instead!” That was completely unexpected. Your eyes widened as you stared at him in disbelief. ‘Is this kid for real..?’ You had to take a few moments to process his words just to make sure you weren’t hearing things. 

“It’s fine miss! My mom said that it’s always good to be a hero and help people in need. I wanted to help you!” There was pure innocence in his face as he spoke excitedly. “So please accept my help! Mom’s gonna be so happy when she finds out that I helped someone today” He was grinning brightly at you and it was hard for you to say no - but at the same time, you wouldn’t want to cause trouble to a child.

“H-hey it’s alright. You don’t have to-” Your words were cut off by him grabbing your hand and shoving the umbrella towards you before running off, not giving you the chance to even thank him. You were left alone with confusion, the umbrella shielding you away from the rain. “He’s surely an odd one..” You murmured under your breath before a small sigh escaped your lips. Though you can’t say that you’re ungrateful for the umbrella.

The little incident with the random child has managed to bring you back to your senses and you figured that it was time to go home. Just when you got up and started walking, a small chiming of some bells attracted your attention. ‘Huh?’ 

There weren’t any bells around you - or that was what you thought until you saw two small cherry shaped bells attached to the child’s umbrella. Words couldn’t explain how overwhelmed you were after seeing the cherry shaped bells, a tear unknowingly streamed down your cheek. 

Perhaps Kakyoin hasn’t completely left, and there was indeed, a part of him that’s still living inside your heart until the day when you can finally reunite with him again.

[xxisxxisxxis]

Gateway Drug | Part Seventy-Two

Hey, guys!! This shit is a LONG chapter so buckle up. I decided (y'all are tired of me doing this I know) to explain Viv's tripping on edibles in the next chapter (posting Monday night) so this chapter takes place after she trips balls, but don't worry, you guys will see that hot mess Express in a few days in flashback form.

Also, @sharon6713 makes youtube videos (here's her masterlist [my favorite of her's is this gem right here for obvious reasons]) anyway, she's been supporting me and my story for a loooooooooooooonnnnnnnnnngggggggg time and I need to return the favor so if you guys have any motley crue, the dirt cast, or any other fandom requests for video content, she's the plug.

If you are interested here is her request form

Again, thank you guys, I love you, and please enjoy the chapter!!

Words: 8.1k

Warning(s): Explicit language, mentions of Drug abuse, violence, explicit sexual situations

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I press my lips to Duff's cheek, then his jaw, then his neck, his chest, his abdomen…

He groans, his eyes tightening a moment as he stretches, his hand in my hair as my lips press just below his navel and he looks at me. 

"Good morning." I say to him, giving one last kiss to his skin before he's pulling me up to peck at his lips. 

"Good morning." He replies as I lay beside him, my leg swung over his waist, my cheek against his left bicep. 

"Did you sleep good?" I ask him next and he nods. 

"Did you?"

"Yeah." I reply, kissing his cheek again, and he grins.

"Okay, if you're gonna be all lovey, I'm gonna go brush my teeth." He goes to sit up but I stop him. 

"No." I whine, keeping him to the bed with my leg. 

"Viv, I probably taste like vodka and cigarettes." He complains with a chuckle. 

"I don't care." I insist and he looks at me. "What? It doesn't bother me." 

He shakes his head a little, brushing my hair out of my face before he kisses me again, and I push my tongue past his lips, sighing when he wraps his arm tighter around my waist.

When we pull away, I notice an abnormality in his right bicep, a wedge shaped scar, and furrow my brows a little. 

He notices and looks at his arm.

"It was a water skiing accident at this lake when I was like 13. I was pulled under and the muscle was stripped from here," his fingers grazing from his elbow to his shoulder, "all the way up here. I almost drowned." He informs me, and I look at him, the thought of him drowning at age twelve is hard to think about. "I saw the light and just felt the warmth of people that had passed on that I knew...it was weird, but, like, it wasn't scary. It happened really fast." He adds. 

"Are you scared to die, now?" I ask him out of curiosity and he shakes his head a little, his fingers brushing against my cheek. 

"No. I'm not. After that experience I decided it's gonna be a good place I go when I die." He states and I smile. 

"I can't imagine you going anywhere but some place good, Duff. You're too kind to go anywhere else." I assure him and he chuckles a little, before kissing at my hand. 

"What about you?" He asks and I let out a breath. 

"I'm not scared of death in the sense of where I'm going afterwards, I know where I'm going and it's no place to be scared of...it's just how I'm going to die, when I'm going to die, and the effect it will have on my loved ones. That's what scares me." I explain. "But at the same time I wouldn't want to know how I'm going to die, or when, or what happens to everybody after I go." 

"Well, no, because that would be a bummer looming over you constantly." He points out. 

"Exactly." I agree. "I'll go whenever God's decided my work here is done, but if he can just let me pass peacefully in my sleep, I won't mind." 

"No strokes, no getting shot, no weed brownie…" he trails off starting to laugh and I try not to laugh. "...overdoses." he manages to get out through his laughter.

"It's not funny." I tell him, biting my cheek to keep from chuckling.

"Or crab infestations." He adds. 

"You are so funny. Wow." I cut my eyes at him. 

"Hey, look, I coulda told ya not to eat brownies from Stevie and Slash's room and not to sleep in the same bed as Stevie after a night of him hooking up with several different girls, but I thought that was common sense, Viv." He attempts to speak with a straight face, failing miserably. 

"It took me years to grow hair down there, Duff, and now I look like a thirteen year old all over again, and I had to be fumigated. It's not funny." I finally laugh with him and he rubs his face that's turning red with how funny he finds it that the same night I got stoned shitless off edibles, I slept in the same bed as Steven and woke up with pubic lice. 

"Vivian, c'mon, it'll grow back." He tries to make me feel better. "There wasn't that much down there to begin with, so it's not like--"

"--Shh! I didn't say that so we could have an in depth conversation about my situation down there." I tell him, my face turning red. 

"Viv, baby, I've had my face down there, okay? I've been all up in your situation."

"Duff--"

"--You've been all up in my situation, too, it's nothin--" 

"--Ahh!" I squeal a little, covering my ears and burying my face in my pillow. 

"Hey, you came in the other night talking all types of dirty, and then last night when you were tripping on those brownies you had me blushing pretty freaking bad, and now you get all embarrassed when I'm just stating a fact: we've both had our faces all up in each others'--"

"--Okay, okay, I get it, I get it." I'm blushing so badly I feel the heat of my blood in my face. 

"Alright, alright, I'll stop." He tells me. 

"Thank you." I uncover my face and take a breath, snuggling closer against him.

"...I never noticed you have, like, three cute little freckles down there, though, until there was no hair covering them up." He says next.

"Duff, hush!" I put my hands over his mouth and he bursts into laughter again.

"So, what? You have freckles everywhere. It's cute, Viv." He tells me when he gets away from me and catches his breath. 

"Yes, a higher risk of developing melanoma is cute." I reply sarcastically as he sits up and swings his legs over the side of the bed, about to get up. "Where are you going?" I ask him as he stands up and stretches. 

"I've got rehearsal in an hour." He tells me. "Remember?"

"Oh...right." I mumble.

"C'mon, Viv, don't sound so enthused." He steps to the bathroom and turns on the shower. 

"C'mere really quick." I tell him, and he sticks his head out of the bathroom. 

"What is it?" He asks me as I go to the foot of the bed.

"Just come here for a second." I repeat and he does, raising his brows. "Do you have to go?" I ask him blinking up at him. 

"Yes, I do, and you do too because if neither of us goes that's gonna get people to thinking." He pokes the tip of my nose. 

"Okay." I roll my eyes. 

He kisses me for a split second before going to take his shower. 

I didn't want to go to the bands' rehearsals, I didn't want Duff to go anywhere, I just wanted the both of us to stay locked in that room together and the rest of the world to go the hell away.

He comes out in light wash, lace-up jeans, his Billy Idol tshirt, and his chain that he has around his neck with the small lock hung on it the way Sid Vicious used to wear. 

He's sitting on the edge of the bed, pulling one black cowboy boot on, looking around for the other one that I stole so he can't leave. 

"Viv, have you seen my other boot?" He asks me while I've got it hid under the covers, glancing at the nightstand to remind myself my crucifix is still there.

I stand up on the bed and slip it on my right foot before walking as best I can to him on the mattress before slipping my leg over his shoulder, my foot adorned by his boot resting on the top of his thigh. 

He looks down at it and then up at me, speechless when he sees I'm not completely naked, wearing nothing but his boot and his cream colored cowboy hat. 

I look down at him innocently, knowing exactly what I'm doing and he knows it, but he doesn't call me out on it. 

He just looks at his boot, slowly pulling it off my foot before pressing his lips to my knee before he turns to completely face me, kissing at my inner, lower thigh, and inching higher. 

Right before he can reach his target I'm plopping to my knees on the mattress, his hat nearly falling off of me, making me giggle as my hand flies up to keep it in place for a second, before he's leaning down to kiss me again, his hand grabbing at my bare ass, using that as leverage to pull me completely against him. 

I feel him through his jeans and have to rub my thighs together, eager for him to be in me, before I'm pushing at his chest, causing him to fall back on his back with a little laugh as I crawl over him, the junction of my thighs resting on the tent in his jeans, making him curse under his breath when I lean forward and kiss him, rocking my hips, delicious friction causing a hunger to snake up through my core. 

"I, uh, see the use of the hat now." He gets out through little breaths as I grind against him again, my teeth teasingly pulling at his bottom lip.

"Mhm." I grin, my fingers beginning to untie the string of his pants.

"Before you do that," he starts and I raise my brows, resisting the urge to moan when his finger tips run up and down my spine before giving my thighs a nice squeeze. "I was wondering if you could ride something else first…" he suggests and I'm confused for a millisecond before he slyly runs his tongue along his bottom lip. "...you know, just to get good and broken in, first." He adds and I bite my lip, leaning down and kissing him, again, my tongue dancing with his.

"I will ride anything you want me to." I reply, my lips brushing against his. 

Duff was slowly becoming accustom to the fact that I wasn't sweet innocent vanilla Vivian he had suspected I was...although I'm not sure how the hell he thought Nikki survived sex with me all those years if I didn't adapt to or like the same stuff he did, and Nikki was (and still is) into some weird, nasty, debauched shit, so learning to get into what Duff was in to was a lot easier to do than Duff trying to get in to what I was in to.

"Ah!" I giggle out with a moan laced around it, my thighs tensing as Duff's tongue continues to lap against my clit, holding me to his mouth with his hands at my hips as I can't help but grind in rhythm with his tongue, my hands palming at my chest, adding to the heat spreading in my core. "Duff, tha--oh fuck." I gasp out when he softly nips at the sensitive bud, and I can feel his smile at the sound of my pleasure. "That feels so good." I assure him, my head leaned back, my hands bracing on his chest that's beginning to have a thin sheen of sweat over it and I can't help but to lean down, my tongue running across his skin for a moment before I'm reaching for his cock, nearly drooling at the beading precum. 

I run my tongue across the slit of his tip and he jumps in his skin, not expecting it, making me chuckle to myself before he's sliding two fingers into me, my eyes rolling back at the combination of him finger fucking me while eating me out and I bite my tongue to keep from calling him "daddy" because I remember it freaking him out the other night when I was stoned and called him that.

I moan when I wrap my lips around him and slowly bob my head up and down, enjoying the feeling of him tensing up and trying to keep concentrated in pleasuring me. 

My tongue snakes against his length with each thrust, my tongue savoring every bit of his taste because he sure as fuck is savoring every bit of mine. 

He nearly jumps again when my hand gently massages his balls, making him moan into me. 

I take him out of my mouth, keeping my other hand at his base, jacking him off while I catch my breath before I'm spitting on him, taking him back into my mouth, picking up my pace. 

His grip on my hips tightens when I deep throat him, trying to relax to keep from gagging, but I end up doing it anyway, and I hear him curse under his breath. 

I try one more time and manage to get his entire shaft down my throat to the hilt without gagging, and his hand comes down onto my ass cheek, hard, making me cry out around him as he starts hammering his fingers into me, the wet, sloppy sounds of my sex being played with filling the room and I catch my breath when I pull him out of my mouth, moving my hand up and down his cock at the same speed he's moving his fingers into me. 

My pussy tightens around his fingers while his tongue swipes across my clit a few more times before my cum is wetting at his mouth as "Duff" cracks through my lips while I'm gasping for breath. 

He lets out a hum as he drinks it all in, swiping his tongue from my cunt to my clit, making sure none of it goes to waste. 

When he's done, he's pushing at my waist, moving me off of him.

I roll onto my back, coming down from my high, my chest heaving with heavy breaths as he moves to hover above me, his pure, genuine smile nearly melting my heart. 

I grin at him, leaning up and kissing him as he runs his hand down my side and reaches between us to align himself with my entrance. 

We watch each other as he slowly pushes into me, the feeling of him filling me as much as he can causing my toes to curl, and my legs to wrap around his hips. 

"Are...Are you okay?" He asks me, his forehead against mine and I lick my lips and nod. 

"Yeah." I tell him. "Are you?" 

"Yeah." He replies. 

"Are you gonna move or…?" I ask next and he takes a nervous breath. 

"Duff, I'm fine, I promise." I assure him. 

"I know you are but--" I cut him off, pulling his lips to mine, my tongue moving with his as I tighten my legs around him, causing him to move against my cervix, making the both of us let out moans. 

He pulls out of me before pushing back in, slowly, taking a few more thrusts before he picks up his pace, taking my moans and whimpers as cues that he's doing good. 

"Harder." I say in his ear, and he looks at me for a second. "You're not gonna hurt me, baby." 

He nervously licks his lips before pushing into me more frantically, his prick being forced into me to the hilt, which sends a deliciously painful shock through me, causing me to arch underneath him, my nails clawing down his back, making him groan out, only resulting in him going harder into me. 

"It feels so good." I say, whimpering, my fingers in his blonde hair as his tongue and lips are on the skin of my neck.

"You feel so good." He tells me and I bite my lip.

"Can you do something for me?" I ask him, trying to concentrate on my words as he fucks me, the eagerness on his face to please me making me confident that he'll play into my suggestion. 

"Yeah?" He slows down some, purposefully rooting himself balls deep in me, and I have to keep my eyes from fucking crossing. 

I take his hand and put it around my neck, my hand closing over his fingers to manually tighten them around my throat. 

"You're not gonna hurt me." I assure him, seeing his hesitant facial expression. "Even though I wouldn't be mad if you did." I add, moving my hand from his, and he slowly squeezes at my throat little by little, until it's a comfortable pressure, not as extreme as Nikki's, but enough to make me feel like I'm being completely dominated.

"So wet." He says, and I can already feel a puddle forming under me. 

I hum, taking my index and middle fingers and reaching down, gathering some of my slick juices, holding them to his lips and he doesn't slow his movements as he sucks my fingers into his mouth, cleaning them off, before he leans down and kisses me, allowing me to taste myself on his tongue. 

"Duff." I say, my stomach knotting up, his hand around my throat, his pounding into me, his eyes watching every moment of my oncoming orgasm, welcoming the the pressure building up before it's releasing, my walls contracting around him.

"Oh, jesus, Viv." He groans out, and I smile, kissing him, the taste of vodka and cigarettes on his tongue, but I don't care. 

I can feel that he's about to finish, too, and when he's about to pull out, I'm mustering up the energy to flip us over.

"Just come in me." I say, pressing a small kiss to his lips, moving my hips down so he goes to the hilt in me. 

He lets out a moan when I lick up his neck as he unloads into me, a soft hum slipping past my lips at the feeling. 

I take deep breaths and roll off of him when he's finished, pulling the covers up to my chest as he glances at me, trying to catch his breath. 

"We really gotta start using condoms or something, Viv." He tells me, his knuckle brushing against my cheek before he turns on his side to face me. 

"Won't make a difference." I let out before I can think about it, and he furrows his brows. 

"If you get knocked up, it will." He replies.

I don't answer, sitting up and going to the bathroom to shower off. 

He follows right behind me, and when we're done, we're coming back into the room to the sound of the phone ringing off the hook. 

"Hello?" I answer it without a thought, realizing this isn't my room. 

If it would have been anyone other than one of the members of Guns, or Fred, I would have been screwed.

"Hey, um, not to be rude or anything, Viv, but um, where the fuck is Duff at?" Slash asks me and I remember their fucking rehearsal. 

I look at the clock and see we're an hour and a half late for it. 

"Holy shit." I say.

"And Doc's running around trying to find you, too…" he adds as Duff quickly gets his clothes back on. 

"Just stall, okay? We're coming--and don't mention that me and him are with each other right now." I plead.  

"I won't, but Duff's gonna get his ass chewed: Axl's fucking pissed." He informs me.  

"It wasn't Duff's fault, tell Axl he can get on to me all he wants, but leave Duff out of it. We'll be there in a few minutes. Bye." 

"Bye." 

We hang up and I rush to put clothes on, Duff and I not saying a word to each other as we finish getting ready--but I can tell he's pissed. At me or himself is to be determined. 

One of the most admirable traits Duff possesses is the fact that music is so important to him, he made it a standard that he'd never allow anything to interfere with his effort put forth towards his responsibility in bands he's a part of. 

He was never late to a rehearsal unless there was a good reason, and if he was going to be late he called ahead, he was never too drunk or high to play at a show...he never put anything else he had going on before his band. 

Guns N' Roses, even back when he was drinking and drugging heavily, was no exception. He might not have remembered a bit of the shows played at the peak of his addiction, but he played them well enough that nobody could hear him and say, 'he's really out of it'. The closest he ever got to playing messy on stage was during the Freddie Mercury tribute concert at Wembley, when he was so messed up that when artists gathered to sing "We Are the Champions", he couldn't walk, so Elton John had to practically drag him up on stage to the 50 person chorus line and he took full advantage of the shoulders on either side of him to keep himself upright while Liza Minnelli sung lead.

That was possibly the straw that broke the camel's back in terms of deciding maybe Monroe didn't need to witness his father spiraling as much as he had been. 

He had plenty of his own issues that were at risk of getting before the band, but women getting in the way of his duty to his band? Never happened. 

Except on the tour with Mötley Crüe, and that was what caused Axl and the guys to realize we weren't just hooking up if Duff was willing to let me get in the way of his commitment to the band.

"Where the fuck have you been?" Axl snaps at Duff as he steps to the stage and I take a seat in one of the audience chairs, Sparkie glancing between Duff and I from where he's at standing up, his eyes cut slightly, while Tansy's asleep in the chair closest to him. 

"Axl, I know, man, okay?" Duff replies, knowing he's fucked up. 

"We're talking about this later, don't fucking think this is over." He warns him before glaring at me. 

Fred makes a beeline for me, his brows raised. 

"What the hell, Viv?" He asks me under his breath. 

"Are the gu--" he cuts me short. 

"--Nikki's so fucked he doesn't even realize we're running behind and Tommy and Vince are screwing around with some chicks they picked up on the way over here, Mick's drinking…" he trails off, disappointment all over his features. 

"I know, Fred, I know I messed up." 

"You can't possibly be serious about carrying on with him on this tour without telling anybody." He refers to Duff and I let out a breath. 

"I can't tell Nikki or he'll be pissed and might kick the guys off the tour." I say. 

"So you're just gonna screw someone else without thinking to tell him?" 

"He did it to me." I point out. 

"If he finds out from anyone else--"

"--Which he won't." 

"But if he does, Vivian, I don't want him to take that out on you." He explains. 

"He won't find out, okay?" I promise him. "We'll be more careful, Fred." 

He lets out a breath and relents. 

"Fine, Viv. Fine." 

The moment Guns finishes up and let's Mötley Crüe take over, I see what Fred means about Nikki.

His eyes are completely void, his shell being taken over by heroin, only able to play through muscle memory.

He's so fucked up. 

Apparently I'm not being subtle, and he catches me looking at him, completely stopping his playing altogether in the middle of "All In The Name Of…" 

"The fuck are you staring at?" he snaps at me. 

"Nothing." I mumble, standing up to walk backstage. 

I don't have the energy to argue with him and if he spends what's left of his energy arguing with me, he'll pass out. 

When I get backstage, I hear Axl's muffled voice in what's set to be their dressing room...and I realize he and Duff and the guys are in there.

I press my ear to the door out of curiosity, but I end up regretting it as I hear Axl bark out:

"She's a fucking problem!" 

"I know I held everybody up but it's not her fault, it's on me." Duff explains.

"If anybody was paying enough attention to realize you two had to have been off together, they can tell somebody and we're fucked, Duff, do you fucking realize that? And if they kick us off this tour and talk shit to the press it's gonna take us longer to get to our goal and you're gonna be responsible for letting a piece of ass get in the band's way." Axl states. 

"I know." Duff replies, not arguing. He sounds too embarrassed and disappointed to argue. 

"And if this happens again, I'll tell Doc so he'll keep a tighter leash on her so she won't get herself or you into anymore fucking trouble on this tour." It's his final promise, and I hear him stepping to the door, making me scramble to hide behind the corner of the wall as he snatches the door open and stomps off in the other direction. 

Duff being late for that rehearsal kickstarted Axl's personal vendetta against me that started small but grew when Steven was kicked out the band and I raised hell over it. Then got bigger when Tansy relapsed in 1990 due to the stress of Guns N' Roses beginning to implode and Axl's ego getting bigger than God--especially to her in particular--and I told him it was his fault. Then even more when he found out I was the one that suggested suing the band to Steven's mother and came to our house in the middle of the night with a fucking shot gun which didn't scare me because I'd been shot before and was perfectly fine so if that cocky bastard wanted to shoot me again, in front of my fucking kids and be an asshole, then so be it, but it really pissed Nikki off. Then our feud finally came to a head in 1993, when Slash and Duff were Shanghaied into signing a contract relieving the name "Guns N' Roses" to Axl, and solely to Axl, if something were to happen to either of them--quitting, fired, or "death" (although the contract said nothing about death, their manager just used it as a cover up when confronted by Duff over it.) 

Their share of the band remained the same, meaning what Duff was leaving to me and Monroe upon his death in terms of equities and royalties wouldn't be touched, but I was beginning to realize it wouldn't have been much longer before Axl tried to take that, too, just like he had fucking done to Steven. So when Duff explained what had been done, I got on a plane and flew to their next show just to kick Axl's ass once again because Duff and Slash weren't confrontational enough to do it, they just tried to keep the peace as much as they could, but Axl wasn't my fucking lead singer and my kids were too young to know what exactly was going on.

I had nothing to lose. 

He sued--when I kicked him so hard the heel of my stiletto went right through his calf--and ended up with $100,000. 

$100,000 didn't sting me or Nikki as hard as a couple million must've stung him when Steven won his lawsuit against the band, and the prick deserved it. 

They all did in that situation. 

After being sued, though, Nikki wouldn't let me be around him anymore.

If Tansy wanted to hang out, I couldn't go to their house, and I couldn't take Monroe out to see his dad unless they were off the road or there was a guarantee I would be kept separated from Axl at all times.

I guess I really ended up being a "problem" to Axl, after all.

Duff goes out that night, leaving some money for me to get room service but not saying a word to me before he leaves, resulting in me going to my room incase someone tries to come find me and isn't suspicious as to why I'm in Duff's room. 

I'm getting out of my shower after washing my hair when a knock on my door sounds, making me believe it's the room service I ordered…

I put on my robe and open the door, revealing Sparkie. 

My face falls and I'm about to slam the door shut, but he stops it, stepping inside, shutting the door behind him. 

"What the hell do you want?" I ask, crossing my arms and he shrugs. 

"Just to talk." He tells me, smirking. "Ya know, catch up on each other, I feel like we aren't as close as we need to be." He adds and I raise a brow. 

"Because I don't want to be close to you." I state. 

"Well, you're pretty close to Duff with no issue." He voices and my heart nearly stops. "I figured you'd be keeping his bed warm while he's out."

"I don't know what you're talking about." I tell him.

"You two are practically joined at the hip, you were both late for rehearsal, you share a room...just because none of the other guys notice it, doesn't mean I don't." He adds and I roll my jaw. "I already caught you, now we just need to talk about what you're going to do for me, to help remind me not to let it slip to Nikki…" he takes a step closer to me and I back away until my back is against the wall, and he takes advantage of it, his hand going over my mouth before I can yell, causing a line of shock to roll up my spine as he stares down at me, evilly. "I know one thing you can do." He goes on, his free hand teasing at the belt of my robe, before pulling it out of its tie, opening it. 

Tears of anger swell in my eyes as I try to shake off the initial shock so I can fight back. 

"Why don't you show me exactly what was so good about you, that it made Nikki want to marry you, and is making Duff put his own band aside for you?" 

He opens the robe a little more, eyeing my chest, and before he can touch me, a knock on the door and "room service" sounds on the other side of the door.

I use it as an opportunity to get away from him as he lets out an angry sigh for being interrupted before I open the door. 

My food is delivered and I thank the woman who brought it up, grabbing some cash that Duff had left for me for food, from my dresser, and tipping her.

"Thank you." She tells me and I make a point to motion for Sparkie to leave, in front of her, that way if he refused there was a witness.

He doesn't take any chances, giving me a sarcastic smile, stepping to the door, stopping in front of me and getting in my ear and threatening me.

I tried to sleep that night but the eminent risk of Nikki finding out about Duff and I was starting to eat at me. 

With Nikki as bad off as he was, I was scared he wouldn't have been able to handle it, and our relationship was already in shambles, I didn't need him to have more reasons to scream my head off.

Part Seventy-Two -- Part 2

[joyisntyoj]

04: LETTERS TO NOBODY OR MAYBE MAYARI

Seal stamps, stamps with whatever designs, papers and pens, stickers, pictures, dried flowers, heartwarming messages, and a lot more.

When was the last time you wrote something on a literal piece of paper for someone?

Have you ever personally given someone a handwritten letter or sent it from the post office?

Is writing a letter still a thing today, or you just use whatever app you have because what is the point if other ways are more convenient, right?

Maybe, you are more the vocal type of person and, you just say what you feel instead of writing it down?

Perhaps, you are none of the above because what is important is your presence in their lives and, that is more than enough?

Still, how lovely it is to keep something that has sentimental value. It unnecessarily means that you are hoarding something because what's to not treasure from precious memories in a small piece of paper in an envelope?

This story is for those who never get tired of expressing themselves in whatever form they know, but most especially to those who write.

May you never run out of papers, inks, and thoughts to compose. to more unforgotten memories preserved in letters.

^^^

To: Mayari.

How are you? I wish things were getting better, just like what I always pray. These days, sleeping at night suddenly became serene as well as waking up in the morning. Sometimes my days are dull and typical...I believe? But most of the time, it's either I'm feeling blue or extra sad, or was that the same? I kept on blaming the pandemic, but for real, I'm just a mess. Silent battles are truly tough. I wish I had the courage and strength just like yours. Be safe. Stay sane. I'm really trying my best to be legit all right.

With so much love and kindness always and all ways,

Liway.

Liway is the name, exhausted with life. Mayari, someone out there, maybe a supreme being or plausibly not always receives Liway's letters. Sometimes Liway writes 10 messages at once and sometimes none at all. Mayari is the only recipient of such letters that even Liway never knew they were received by the random recipient it thought was just nobody. It all genuinely started on having a recipient written on the "To:" part at the post office. Though seriously, it doesn't even have any home address. It's super weird that it's for Mayari and no address, and were received.

HOW?

^^^

To: Mayari.

The night has come. This time, it feels heavier than usual. Tears are suddenly falling. I noticed that an unwelcome visitor came. The familiar pain is hugging me again, so tight that breathing is getting harder. I hate everything. Yet, I came to realize a lot of things. Afterward, I'm feeling blessed and grateful. Am I getting crazy? Before I went to bed, at the dinner table, I felt uncomfortable with the conversation we had, my family, about myself back then. I really hate it when they keep on bringing up what happened in the past. I already moved on... I think... so can they stop mentioning those moments? Honestly, whenever anything from the past is introduced again and remembered, I tend to feel like it just happened yesterday. Everything is coming back so fresh and new; fun, pain, sweats, and tears. I hate it.

PS. Mayari, can you send me some courage? Preferably in capsules, So I can have it in my intakes and be sure I'll be really having it in my system literally.

With so much love and kindness always and all ways,

Liway.

Continues writing so many letters filled with how living is like. Liway felt tired and exhausted. A few days ago, it was super overwhelmed that crying is unavoidable. Then this morning, Ms. Walmy called for a little chat and checking up because it's never too bad to check up on somebody, most especially when you're a counselor. It's your job, so uh? Anyway, though Liway was out of focus on the call, it was able to be accomodating and warm in return. It reciprocated the thoughtfulness with a sweet smile.

^^^

To: Mayari

Hey! Today I was mad because firsthand, I experienced that thing I usually hear from other people. The "don't-post-something-revealing-on-social-media-but-love-yourself-but-that's-not-appropriate". Well, I don't even know why I'm reacting super outrage towards it. Because knowing that my family is just concerned for me since the internet is frankly scary. I mean, I did nothing wrong, so why? Maybe deciding to be confident on the internet is not necessary for them. But for me, it is! So how should I deal with this? A friend consoled me, and I feel better. Still tho, my mood is already ruined. Oh gosh.

With so much love and kindness always and all ways, 

 Liway.

Welcoming a new week, the usual Liway is busy with the household chores. Some may find it stressful, but this one is pretty different. Scrubbing the floor, washing the dishes, brooming on the side. Later on, folding the clothes, fixing the bed, and a lot more things. It looks like it'll be tiring its body out until the nose bleeds, and passing out is the last resort to rest. How come it's easier to clean an actual mess than the one inside the head and heart?

^^^

To: Mayari.

Beloa visited me today. My childhood and the only friend left I have up to this day from elementary school. If you get what I mean? It's been a long time since we had a chat, especially that things are super complicated these days. She's doing really well, and I couldn't be more proud. I'm still amazed at how we manage to be friends because we both don't like each other to begin with. It's so funny that we even pulled each other's hair in the 4th grade while the class is taking the annual picture for the school year remembrance. What are the odds in this even, right? HAHAHA. Today was warm and bright.

With so much love and kindness always and all ways,

Liway.

Dates suddenly don't vary in these letters. Even the concept of time is somehow gone. What's important is regardless of not having these "important details" like the usual, Liway can keep up and be consistent in sending its letters. Liway never missed a chance to send a letter to the address less recipient, which left the post office staff to ponder with it. But as time goes by, Alle, the clerk, is no more surprised 'coz she's used to everything now. The envelopes unfailingly vanished the moment it was dropped inside the mailing box. Indeed, a magical mailbox.

^^^

To: Mayari.

I never knew how amazing pretending could be. You know that thing where someone usually says I'm okay, but really not? The inner saboteur that was triggered by their trauma is real-real-real. A car is useless when it's not moving if you wanted to travel to faraway places. Does that make sense?

PS. It sucks that our bathroom is the only "semi-safe space".

With so much love and kindness always and all ways,

Liway.

Polar bears are really fascinating. They get to hibernate. Then, after the time being, back on hunting and living their lives. Ligaya was one of Liway's hero. A lot knew Ligaya for being a superhero, although she does not have that fantasy powers. Just like the polar bears, too, Ligaya has been hibernating for quite some time but kept on saying that she was not. Liway saw it all. Maybe a bear's hibernation is different from a human-being, hmm?

^^^

To: Mayari.

IDK what to say, but I just wanted to be consistent at the very least in sending you letters.

PS. The radio was broken, but in my head, it's working. It kept on playing nonstop music. Is this a poetic way of saying I'm overthinking things?

With so much love and kindness always and all ways,

Liway.

^^^

To: Mayari.

A lot happened lately. Somebody lost a precious one, and here I am, having a renaissance moment. It's a crazy ride, but for all it's worth, the pea has grown into a beautiful plant. Hope it made sense coz finally, everything is making sense to me now. Little by little, slowly and surely.

With so much love and kindness always and all ways,

Liway.

^^^

To: Mayari

Hey!! I hope you are doing great!!! These days, everything felt surreal. I get to be active everywhere. It's draining, yet I feel so alive than ever. I had this thought that time is indeed just a concept, hmm? I mean, anytime is the right time to do what you want and whatever it is. Nothing is too late, most especially when it comes to growth. OH, being late in class still counts but FOR REAL RIP TO THE ONLINE CLASS SETUP -_-

PS. May we never run out of time to be the best versions of ourselves. LOVE WHOEVER YOU WANT. fck the situation, but SOON, GO ANYWHERE YOU WANT. SPEND FOR YOURSELF AND FOR YOUR LOVED ONES. FEEL EVERYTHING.

PSS. May we leave this world with fewer regrets and more amazing memories.

With so much love and kindness always and all ways, 

Liway.

Quite a lot of letters were already sent. The post office is getting more and more letters, as well as Mayari. Still, NO REPLY. Maybe some other, Liway will be able to hear Mayari's words.

^^^

To: Mayari.

*here's an envelope just in case you want to write me something*

With so much love annd kindness always and all ways, 

Liway.

'Tis the season to be jolly. LOL Nah. Liway has been out for the past weeks. By out, means on a hibernation mode. A L O T R E A L L Y happened. It's hard to put it into words. I guess Liway will end these letter-sending shenanigans or just lazy and trying to give out some excuses //

^^^

To: Mayari. 

Ever since I was taught how to move around the kitchen, I've been assigned to be Mom's assistant while cooking for the feast every event/occasion we'll be celebrating. It's tiring but super fun. Getting your fingers bleed and while unaware is cool LOL~ 

PS. Why does it feel so good to overthink things while doing the dishes? What's with that scenario.........

With so much love and kindness always and all ways, 

Liway.

Tireless hands, heart, and mind with countless thoughts and feelings, papers, and pens everywhere—WRITING; it surely is one of the best ways to vent. Though letters can’t hug and wipe one's tears, witness waves of laughter, ease the pain, and such, the comfort from every word written is more than enough.

Suddenly time barge in and reminded me that this is enough. THIS IS ENOUGH FOR 2020...

A new chapter has arrived, and maybe it's time to move forward. Maybe this is where it all gonna stop for a while. I mean, writing is somehow tiring, literally. Probably, Mayari might reply with the number of letters sent anytime soon, so maybe waiting is all that needed.

No rush in moving on.

MAY YOU GET THE REPLY YOU LONG FOR SO LONG.

PRIORITIZE YOURSELF AND HAVE COURAGE.

BE KIND ALWAYS AND ALL WAYS.

💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜

Little did nobody know, Liway is writing a letter to her "ideal" self.

The letter-sending-to-nobody thingy of Liway is really mind-boggling, right?

Mayari is Liway. Liway is Mayari.

The things that Liway wanted to say but cannot articulate well were always sent to Mayari. Mayari is the version of Liway it wishes to become in the future. 

The weak Liway longs and hopes to have "that" someone by her side to look up to. That's why she always writes letters and keeps them in the memory box.

The post office thingy was actually her shared room at home: the table at the corner with no lights but so much mess. It's that post office.

It's pandemic, so how can a post office be open and how brave she is to go out, right?

That saying, "be the hero you wanted to have when you were little", is the best explanation of Liway's way of venting and expressing.

Nobody knows when Mayari will come to life because it's no certainty that we can be the ideal self we all wanted to happen. 

For now, Liway is fighting her battles and screaming louder to the universe,

UNTIL WHEN DO I HAVE TO FEEL THIS WAY?

To be continued...

Happy New Year, Mayari. ✨💜

This is like an excerpt from my quarantine shenanigans for 2020 LOL.

[elizabethrobertajones]

not to play devil's advocate bc fuck that anon, but i don't think they were bitching about the destiel scene per se so much for the context of it, and the big romantic implication that we were waiting for was just a throwaway sex joke from a demon that we've heard the likes of so many times and it.. doesn't really move their relationship anywhere. i hope you understand.

Yeah, I do, when you’re not aggressive about it (thanks

I just feel like that anon’s aggressiveness was entirely about the sense of being promised an entire scene and then lashing out and blaming me/the fandom/the show?? for promising them something huge and taking their generalised disappointment/overall anger at the show and bundling it all into using this as the scapegoat for their anger. If they had just taken a mo to read those tweets again it came across fairly clearly to me that it was a single line and also one that was in the category of whoops and cheers and laughter from Jensen rather than “awww”s and other less bawdy reactions. The thing is that those spoilers weren’t hyping it up as anything more than what it was, and knowing now full well that it was a single line, re-read those tweets and it’s very clear that they were reporting faithfully on the moment while trying not to spoil it. Especially all 4 together in that post, which was the most popular I saw circulating, and I feel like anon in particular seemed to have been waiting for an entire scene and somewhere or other got very hyped up for something that no one had promised them from any of these 1st hand reports. Seeing the tweets again reminded me I had the anon in my inbox and I got pretty pissed off that they got so annoyed about it when I was taking another look at the spoilers with all the context… I just, like, really hate speculation and spinning enormous narratives like gold out of straw. 

I didn’t really talk about the moment itself, but, yeah. It isn’t anything new - Dabb has even written 3 years ago an almost identical scene with the angels taunting Cas with the implication he and Dean are boning, but this one made the connection absolutely clear for the audience, with no leaps whatsoever to connect what he was saying to Destiel, vs it being Dean’s phonecall that set that angel to threatening to cut off Cas’s junk. And we’ve gone a pretty long time since that level of taunting. I’ve always liked that 7x23 was the last time we got a “he’s your boyfriend” for a pretty hefty stretch of Carver era… I’m actually struggling to remember if there ARE any direct implications in seasons 8 or 9, and then in 10 we get the “Deastiel” moment in 10x05, and the deleted boyfriends argument in 10x14, and overall Carver era is extremely low on these implications and ‘jokes’ compared to Gamble era. I DO think the direct implications without any actual representation or canon sucks especially because these heap up and up and up in the ongoing annuals of Dean n Cas implications which are starting their 10th full year now. Like, interesting as they are on a meta level and for rolling along with the story having fun etc, cumulatively they suck when that’s as visible as it gets. 

I do think, though, that in general this line would have been treated with a lot more fun if it hadn’t been spoiled at all because even sensible people like yourself can build up an expectation that the line might not be another one of these, just out of hoping for the best/giving the show the benefit of the doubt. Like actually maybe it could be someone calling Cas on his feelings (like 13x04 and the Empty accusing him of having some secret love, which was profound rather than teasing and a whole other category of this stuff minus the whole har har it’s funny that you might be gay together thing which for me hands an enormous amount of leeway to the snide comments from bad guys as it creates the weight to the relationship which makes it more than something spun from nothing but needling from villains who think its a joke, whether they seem to believe it or not). So I do get the hope that you can build up that it might have been something else, even against the spoiler than Jensen absolutely cracked up at it (which to me, knowing how he laughs at these things in general, was really the thing that made me guess it was going to be pretty much what we got but I know I apply a lot of lowest possible expectations to thinks just to protect myself). 

Being bitter and cynical about it without proper mental upkeep in the direction of positivity can be really wearing. *I* can be cynical because I don’t mean it as wank and I know I still love the show etc etc so I’m prepared for the event without it coming across as disappointment… But that’s a strong mental wall I made and I know not everyone wants to/can/thinks we should have to do that. I sort of feel ALL media can be disappointing or not what you were after and basically only stuff you make yourself and a rare few creators will scratch the exact thing you want without issues. So I don’t feel it’s weird to allow SPN leeway to do sucky things so much as it’s the thing I’m most invested in so I have to be a lot more clear about them, while if other media lets me down in some way I am way more casual and roll with it easier to start with. And with SPN being heavily invested for so long, I’ve weathered SO MUCH outrage over these things and worse and less that something like this is very easy for me to soak with my mental armour and take on the chin and see it for what it is in the first place and so on without having particularly bitter thoughts when I immediately divine what type of line it will be from the spoilers. It’s not a “oh it will probably be garbage gay teasing” it a much more gentle reaction, knowing that I’ve already watched this far knowing the show does it so one more instance is just another for the record books. 

I mean there’s a feeling of collecting the show’s sins and weighing its heart when all is said and done in the future when the show ends. But that’s extremely morbid so I don’t linger on that part of this sort of disassociative permissiveness to the show’s nonsense :P

Anyways. It’s good to be excited about the show but when it comes specifically to wild destiel spoilers I do think this fandom seriously needs an overall better filter to decide what will truly happen, and there’s no one person to blame, it’s a mindset and we very easily get carried away, and I’ve had to learn the hard way that I need to set myself as a rock in that river and let it wash past me. And not make hard lines of saying not to get enthusiastic for ANYTHING because oftentimes spoilers about Dean n Cas working together or chilling together DO turn out to be really good and in no way should we approach the episodes like we’re going to be attacked, because that’s where bitter stan fandom factions come from. It’s so complicated, and I really was trying not to say anything about it but then I got frustrated and it’s hard to be completely perfect about keeping quiet on annoyances… :P 

I don’t know what the tl:dr is here.. I don’t blame people for getting excited, for sure. But maybe just for lashing out at others when they don’t get what they want and are really incautious. The original anon conjured a whole scene up they wanted, not just a line, and that to me is the perfect example of fandom spinning straw into gold with hype, and something I really can’t stand and at that point I start to say there IS a personal blame/responsibility. Peeps who weren’t THAT irrationally expectant and then proportionately furious after are cool and I wasn’t blaming anyone else >.> 

[lifeisdabubbles-undersalmondean]

La Pomme ~ Chapter 12

Pairing: Sam x OC (eventual Dean x OC and Dean x Castiel. And I mean eventual.)

Series summary: George is a casual French-Mistake-universe Supernatural fan living in no-COVID 2020, who's life is upended when she's suddenly launched between realities, two years into the boys' past (S13E22). What begins as an insane, immersive fan experience turns into more when Jack goes missing and George offers up her AU information to help track him down. Soon it's discovered that she and Sam may actually have history. But that's impossible, right?

Word Count: 5,500

Warnings: {smut, fluff, angst, show level violence, swearing, mentions of suicide} ***Detailed warnings will be tagged for specific chapters.

A/N: Following the events of my prequel Paradise and second story From My Eyes Off. Reading those first gives context but isn’t necessary to start this one.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

George was lounging in the warm bath water, trying to use breathing exercises to clear her mind and calm herself. It had been a long day, capping off a long almost-month inside the Supernatural Universe. There were so many questions she couldn't answer and she wished she could turn her brain off; focus on anything else.

"George?" She heard Dean's muffled call from the other side of the bathroom door. "You OK in there?"

"Yea," She answered quietly. "Just humiliated," She added with an eye roll.

"Don't sweat it," Came his unusually sympathetic reply. "We've all been there, or somewhere similar… or somewhere worse," He added off handedly, taking another bite of pie. It occurred to him suddenly that the two of them were alone and Dean had a thought. After a moment's hesitation, he swallowed his bite of pie and called timidly, "George?"

"Yea?" She responded curiously, her voice raised slightly to compensate for the sound barrier. There was such a long pause with no answer that she wondered if it had just been her imagination. As she was about to call out again, she heard him finally.

"Can I ask you something?" Came an inquiry so quiet she almost didn't hear it. He sounded uncharacteristically troubled and… nervous?

"Yea, sure," She answered gently.

"What do you know about Michael?"

"Michael who?" Came her quick, confused reply.

"The archangel? Asshole that's been wearing me as a suit the last few weeks?" She was suddenly reminded of the fact that she was living inside of a TV show and it stunned her into silence. "That Michael? Has he not been on the show or...?" The nervous huff in his reply shook her out of her stupor. She realized this must be a hard topic for him. Unfortunately, though, she didn't have any insight to give.

"Oh fuck, right, Michael," She swallowed and gathered her thoughts before replying with a sigh, "I'm sorry, Dean, I don't really know much. I hadn't started this season yet," She finished apologetically.

"Thanks," Came a sarcastic reply.

She frowned and defended, "Look, I have a life, dude! I get behind, I can't always tune in every Thursday! Trust me, no one is more sorry about that than me right now. Maybe if I had, I could have done something to prevent this insane situation." A heavy sigh dotted the end of her sentence pointedly. Then she had a strange, disconcerting thought:

Would you really have prevented this from happening if you had a choice?

The thought startled her and she guiltily refused to answer herself.

A welcome distraction for her was noticing the silence that followed her answer to Dean; George could tell he was still concerned. Reaching over and grabbing the door handle, she cracked it just enough to spy Dean sitting on the edge of the mattress, holding a take out box. He glanced at her almost imperceptibly and she could tell her eyes weren't exactly welcome, so she turned her head away but left the door open.

"Here's what I've heard/seen on accident," She started, pausing to think and then saying carefully, "He comes back somehow," She heard him bristle but kept going, "And you do something to trap him. Some kind of box… or maybe a walk-in freezer?" She was trying to organize the spoilers she'd seen and identify what was related to Michael and what wasn't. "I know that doesn't make a lot of sense and I'm sorry, but that's all I've got."

Dean sighed and shrugged, "It's alright, George. I'm just… feeling lost. Was hoping for some clues, but it's not on you to save my bacon." George gave a wry smile to the bath water and sat quietly for a moment.

Finally she turned her head to look at him and asked, "You want to know what I do know, Dean?"

Slowly, he turned to look at her with an intrigued eyebrow, "I don't know, do I?"

With an amused eye roll she spoke, "I know this--right now--this story line with alternate Michael? It's two seasons behind where you and your brother end up in my reality. And--at least as far as I remember--this alternate Michael isn't a starring role for very long."

Dean furrowed his eyebrows at her in consideration, "Meaning?"

She shrugged and offered, "Meaning, you figure this out. Like you always do. You will figure this out and you will beat Michael and be onto the next big bad, whomever that is. Which, don't even ask because I really have no idea. Haven't watched those seasons at all yet… I think there's one episode where you meet Scooby Doo?"

Dean smirked and rolled his eyes, telling her matter-of-factly, "We already did that."

"No shit?! That already happened?" When he nodded in confirmation George 'ughed' loudly, rolling her eyes, "Damnit, that must have been one of the ones I just watched. What was it like?! Was Shaggy really high? Was Daphne really hot? Was Scooby just adorable?!"

Dean chuckled and answered, "Uh, yes, hell yes, and duh! It's Scooby Doo! Of course he's adorable!"

"Was it weird to be animated?"

He shrugged a little, "Eh, kin-"

She cut him off with a gasp, "Wait! Was all of you animated, like.. did you have all your-"

He shook his head and proclaimed, "That's none of your business!"

"Sorry!" George apologized defensively, then begged, "Tell me you and Daphne-"

"George!" Dean admonished with feigned offense, "I don't kiss and tell."

She scoffed and guessed, "Struck out, huh?"

Dean frowned and simply said, "Her and Fred are an item. I didn't want to break that up," to which George laughed in disbelief.

"Yea, I got it. I think things are starting to come back to me now," George teased him and he shrugged in defeat, unable to deny the fact that he definitely struck out with Daphne. When her laughter died away, she looked at him again and said, "I'm sorry I can't be more of a help. I know, I know, it's not my job to save you but that doesn't mean I enjoy not being able to." They were quiet again for a minute and she sighed, "If I could just call Ryan."

"Who's he?"

"She is my Winchester Wiki," She explained very matter of factly and Dean stared at her with an annoyed expression. With a smile she continued, "She's my friend and she's also a fan of the show; Got me back into it later in life and, well lets just say, she pays closer attention than I do. She'd be able to help you with this whole Michael problem without breaking a sweat. Oh and she's gorgeous," George tossed on and Dean raised a curious eyebrow. She caught his curious expression and asked, "You don't happen to have a phone with trans-universal long distance coverage by chance?"

Dean snorted and shook his head in bemused defeat, "Not on me." He was frustrated that she didn't have more insight on Michael, though somewhat comforted by the fact that-at least in her reality-he wasn't dead yet. That was something, he guessed.

"So," George smirked at him, glee in her eyes, "American's Next Top Model, hmm?"

"What, are you surprised? A house full of attractive models?" Dean gave her an obvious expression.

She shark-mouthed understandably and nodded, "Fair point. Allison cycle 12? Ooof. Hello!"

Dean considered her assessment for a moment, then nodded agreeably but offered, "Mercedes, cycle 2."

George had to remember who that was for a minute but then nodded emphatically, "Yes! Gorgeous and she was good. She ended up top three, right?"

They compared notes for a few minutes, until he finished the last bite of pie in the container he was holding. Then he whipped out his phone and muttered in her direction, "Finish your bath. I'm gonna text Sam for more towels."

When Sam got the text he snagged a pile from a housekeeping cart on their way back to George's room. They had also stopped by the car and brought up a few bags, per his request. Dean carefully handed George the towels through the bathroom door, so as to not accidentally see any bits, and then turned to Sam for a room update.

"Bad news: no adjoining rooms. The best I could do was five doors down. Even more bad news: only one queen bed." Sam held up the room key with a feigned wince. "But listen, I don't think we should leave George alone, so I'll just crash on the floor in here and you can take the room."

"Wow, what a sacrifice," Dean chuckled knowingly at his brother and snatched the key from him. "Shouldn't we have Cas handle it, though?"

"No, why?" Sam protested a little too fast.

"Because he doesn't need sleep. He can keep an eye on the little deserter. Make sure she doesn't do it again?"

Sam frowned, "She's not going to. And if she does, I think I can handle it. How is she supposed to get any sleep with Cas staring at her all night?"

"I don't stare at people when they sleep," Cas interrupted. With a huff he clarified, "I stare at the wall."

Dean looked at the offended angel and shrugged, "It's not that bad. He's quiet. Honestly, it's kind of comforting when you think about it." There was an awkward pause and Dean added, "Sometimes he'll sing for you if you ask nice-"

"Dean," Castiel admonished him for sharing something so intimate. Cas only did that for him.

Sam looked between the two of their sheepish faces and then assured sarcastically, "Yea, a singing angel staring at the wall in the dark. Totally not creepy."

George came out of the bathroom wrapped in the clean towels from Dean. She was now looking a little sheepish as well, "Hey, sorry about earlier. All of it. I jus-"

"Ah, ah, ah!" Dean held up a hand to her. "Save it for the morning. You can spill your guts over breakfast. We couldn't get adjoining rooms, so Cas and I will be just down the hall; Sam will stay with you tonight. On the floor," He said pointedly with a 'behave' look toward Sam, who rolled his eyes in irritation. George nodded, barely listening, and let out a tired sigh.

Then she had a startling thought and groaned, "Shit. I'm going to have to put those crusty clothes back on."

Dean grinned proudly, "You're not the only one with surprise gifts." He took the bags that Sam and Cas had retrieved from the car and set them down on the wooden table.

"What's this?" She asked, grabbing one of the handles and peeking into the bag where she spotted the Friends logo hoodie she'd picked out at Target. "My clothes? My deodorant?! Oh Dean! Thank you so much! I would kiss you but you have pie like… all over your face, but thank you!" As she dug into the bags to search for the PJs, Dean looked questioningly at Sam and Cas who nodded in confirmation.

"Why didn't you say anything?" Dean grumbled, moving over to the sink to wipe his face. Sam shrugged in feigned innocence, laughing internally at his idiot brother.

"How did you get all the clothes I picked?" She asked, impressed.

"We got lucky; Sam happened to hear one of the employees complaining about a nutty woman who'd run from the store like a bat outta hell and abandoned all her stuff," Dean gave her a pointed stare.

She looked first at Sam, and then Cas and Dean, with immense gratitude, "Thank you, thank you, thank you!" Her spirits had been lifted a little. The fresh underwear alone was going to make her feel a thousand times better.

"They mentioned they'd already put back one or two items when we asked about it, so hopefully we got the right replacements." Sam warned her.

"I don't care! I can apply deodorant and brush my teeth; I'm sure I can put together at least one clean outfit with what's here! So I'm hap-" She suddenly stopped and froze, having discovered a strange item in one of the bags. "Wha?" In one swift motion she pulled out a pale pink lace bodysuit and held it up for them to see. With an annoyed, yet curious expression she looked at Dean and asked, "Someone care to explain this?"

Dean held his hands up in innocence and Sam inspected the garment in confusion.

"It looked nice on the mannequin and the Target associate who helped me pick it out said it was bold, yet feminine. Perfect for the new woman in my life," Castiel happily explained, sounding as though he was reciting someone else's words.

George blushed a bit, looking at Sam and Dean like 'is he for real?', unsure how to respond. Both men shrugged unhelpfully, avoiding eye contact with the item she was still holding, and remained quiet. Cas seemed so proud, she didn't want to ruin it.

Finally, she stuttered out, "Wow. OK, well… thanks. Very thoughtful of you, Castiel…"

"If you wanted to provide me with your exact measurements, the sales associate offered to help me pick out a 'matching bra and panty se'-"

"OK, why don't we quit while we're ahead, eh Buddy?" Dean grabbed up four of the remaining takeout boxes and motioned for Cas to do the same. He then reached for the pink, lacey material in George's hand, jokingly trying to take it from her.

She swatted him with it and held it out of his reach, "Hey! You're the old woman in his life."

He couldn't help but laugh in response, though he shook his head in annoyance, and then headed out the door with the angel in tow, "See you crazy kids in the morning!"

When they left George looked at Sam curiously, "Is it wrong that I kind of want to give Cas 'my measurements' and then watch him try to pick out lingerie?"

Sam smirked in amusement but nodded, "Yes."

"Oh, you're no fun," George chuckled and tossed the teddy back into the bag.

"Perhaps the wrong audience?" He suggested with a chuckle.

"Yea, that's fair," She agreed. While she rifled through the bags and grabbed out some black PJ pants, a light blue, short sleeved t-shirt, and a pair of underwear, Sam watched her quietly. To say he was relieved to find her safe and unharmed was an understatement. He'd also been thrilled by her admission that she liked it here, but, like Cas, he was curious what it meant. And what it could mean for him.

Does she like it enough to stay maybe? He cursed at himself for even thinking it.

"Uh, George?" He finally pushed through the nerves and forced himself to speak.

"Hmm?" She responded curiously, not looking up from her bags just yet.

He tried to adopt a nonchalant, yet comforting tone and asked, "When you were saying earlier that you felt… comfortable here? Like you belong? What did you mean?"

Pausing her rummaging, she glanced over at him, caught off guard by the question. Truthfully, she didn't know if she could answer it. She was quiet for a long time, trying to decide how deep she wanted to get into this.

Finally, she turned to him and said, "Back home I… I've always had this strange, out of place feeling. Major dysphoria my whole life and kinda irritatingly painful too, like... full body restless leg syndrome. I've always imagined it similar to how a trans individual might experience feeling like they were born in the wrong body, ya know?" Sam made a noise of confirmation and she continued, "Except, my body is fine--well, it's not the cause of this problem anyway," they chuckled together.

"It's more… my whole being was wrong somehow, like I didn't belong. Anywhere. I had trouble connecting with people and making friends; even my own family seemed so different from me. I felt like I was on a different wavelength than other people, and not in a snooty, I'm-better-than-anybody way but like a sad, I-have-hardly-any-friends-because-I-can't-relate way, so it sucked. Hard. My family wasn't much help; though they tried to help by testing me for every 'disorder' you could think of. Nada. I was just… inexplicably different and no one could explain why. I could barely explain what I was feeling. They--my parents--were surprisingly relieved when I came out after college. For them, my 'struggle with the fact that I liked boys and girls throughout my childhood' explained everything away so perfectly, that they wrote it off right then and there. But it never had to do with that; my sexuality was nothing I ever struggled with, I just didn't feel like I needed to tell them. And since I'm still queer in this reality..." She trailed off her point, allowing him to fill in the blanks, with a chuckle.

Sam nodded with a sympathetic smile, clearly reading on her face how painful her experience had been. Gently he asked, "And now, being here, i-in this reality, you feel...?"

Her head tilted to the side and, looking at him wide-eyed, she sighed deeply, "Now? God, now, I feel… normal? Or, at least what I can only assume normal people feel like." Suddenly her voice was heavy with deep emotional relief, "I don't know how to explain it… and I don't know why, maybe I don't even care why, but I feel so good for the first time in forever. Emotionally, spiritually, physically... The constant restless buzzing is mercifully just gone. Sometimes I think I feel it again--that terrible, agonizing discomfort--and my heart skips a beat. But then my brain registers that it really is gone and I still feel good! And that feeling is almost better than the best sex I've ever had."

Sam shark-mouthed in surprised appreciation and teased kindly, "So, I guess you did know how to explain it?"

George let out the breath she hadn't realized she was holding with a chuckle and nodded, "Yea, I guess so. Honestly, I'm a little scared to go back," A few tears that had welled up as she was proselytizing spilled down her cheeks uncontrollably and she reached up to wipe them away, blushing lightly.

As George contemplated her admission in the silence, the guilt she felt over leaving them earlier was back. Why the hell did she leave if she'd felt so damn good here? She also felt like a stupid, impulsive child running away from the only people who seemed to care about her, at least insofar as they didn't want her to die. She felt especially guilty that Sam had stuck his neck out for her with Dean and she'd basically stomped on it.

Sam stood awkwardly, watching her with an empathetic grimace. He nearly leapt over to comfort her but… Christ, was this situation complicated. Maybe if things were different, maybe if she wasn't safer in her old reality, maybe if they hadn't handcuffed her to a chair and interrogated her, maybe if she hadn't spent the last few hours crying through an existential crisis, maybe if he wasn't terrified she would push him away in disgust? Maybe if she wasn't practically naked right now... maybe then he wouldn't feel so torn about walking over and wrapping her up into a bear hug.

After a moment of nervously wringing her fingers, George met his eyes and took a deep breath, apologizing, "I'm sorry I ran, Sam. I don't even really know why I-"

"Hey, you don't have to explain anything to me," Sam shook his head definitively, taking a few small steps toward her, now within arms reach. "I understand what you're going through-sort of, and you know, in reverse but still-I get it. Don't worry about it," He reached over and took her hand, squeezing it, "I'm just happy I found you."

At his touch, her heart skipped a beat and she felt her whole body flush, goosebumps forming on her skin. The sincerity in his voice and the look in his eyes nearly made her physically swoon. Was that an admission of something or just a subtextless statement of forgiveness? Staring into his eyes made her feel like she was on the downswing of the world's tallest roller coaster. She had to force herself to break eye contact before she could breathe again. He squeezed her hand once more before slowly letting go and as he did she had a realization.

"Thank you." Mustering up a smile through her butterflies, she clumsily grabbed the clothing she needed. "Anyway, I'm suddenly very, very aware of the fact that I'm naked-oh and have been since the three of you got here," She realized, blushing again. Jesus, I took a bath with Dean Winchester in the next room. Her legs felt like jelly as she tried to remain cool, calm, collect, walking toward the bathroom, "Uh, so, I should probably go put some clothes on, now."

Sam nodded understandingly and said with an earnest expression, "Hopefully not on my account." When George froze mid step and jerked her head towards him, burning red from head to toe, he faltered, "Er-uh-I just meant, you don't need to feel uncomfortable naaak-err-without-I mean you aren't making me uncomfortable while-without… clothes." George was relaxed by his shy, adorable stuttering, although at this point 'shy' surprised her. He'd been just as bold back at the bunker, more than once. He sighed and gave her a meek smile, "Uh, somehow this sounded less creepy in my head."

With a chuckle she put him out of his misery, "Relax, Ravenclaw, I understand. It's not on your account, it's on mine," She assured him, to which he nodded thankfully, a relieved expression on his face. She turned back to the door of the bathroom, pushing it open and stepping in.

When she exited the bathroom again, now fully clothed, the only light in the room was now the small, soft light above the bed. At first, the room seemed empty and George wondered if she'd scared Sam away with all her emotions. She was about to call out for him when she finally noticed a pair of big old feet sticking out from along the side of the bed near the window.

"Sam? What are you doing?" She walked over and found him lying on the ground on top of one solitary blanket.

"Just relaxing." He shrugged boyishly.

"On the floor?"

He clarified, "On my bed."

"Sorry, this tissue paper is supposed to be your bed?" She asked for clarification.

"Standard issue motel comforter. And, yea, it's perfect," He reached down on his side and pulled the right side of the blanket over himself. "See, you just fold the top over and it becomes a mattress and a blanket in one!" He seemed genuinely pleased about his makeshift accommodations, as though he was sharing a trade secret with her.

"Wow," she tried to sound impressed, "clever." She hopped onto the bed above him complimenting a bit sarcastically, "Quite the boy scout, aren't you?"

His head jerked up to look at her. There it was again. Another line direct from his dream falling familiarly from her lips. Hearing the pet name conjured images in his mind of the dream woman saying it. It felt identical.

But, how? That dream wasn't real. It was just Gabriel. George is a different woman, it's just a coin-

"Hey, can I ask you something?" George cut into his internal panicking with a soft voice suddenly.

"Yep?" He tried to seem nonchalant.

"Well… OK, I'm just going to say this because fuck it, I have nothing to lose at this point," She wasn't looking at him but sensed his nervous curiosity right away. Ignoring her own butterflies, she said, "Seems to me that the Sam I met at the bunker would have committed to that earlier 'unintended' innuendo." She raised a sideways brow at him, checking out of the corner of her eye to make sure he understood what she was referencing. When she could tell he did, she finally turned her head to meet his eyes and with a shy smile asked, "So, what gives?"

Sam considered her question for a minute; he wasn't sure where to start. Finally he folded his hands in his lap and shrugged sadly, "Actually, uh-about that, I feel like I owe you an apology."

Oooh, that doesn't sound good, George tried to hide her grimace. Her stomach started twisting in painful knots. What's that you were saying about nothing to lose?

"Por que?" She was trying to stave off a cold sweat.

"For… Well, I guess, how about handcuffing you to a chair and interrogating you for starters? For allowing you to be sexually assaulted by a demon? For letting you risk your life to come with us on this hunt? For hitting on you when you were obviously going through a difficult time? Take your pick."

She let out a breath of surprised relief and smiled curiously, "Oh… well in that case, let me just say: one, your brother was the one who handcuffed me to the chair--and it was understandable. Two, it's not your responsibility to protect me from the likes of Tim. He wasn't the first creep and he won't be the last." He seemed thoroughly unsatisfied by that response, so she tried to lighten it up by continuing, "And three, you didn't let me come on the hunt. Clearly I strong armed you." A tiny snort of amusement emitted from him and she smirked, then added curiously, "And, lastly, just to be clear… you were hitting on me?"

He huffed in humiliation, running his hand over his face, unable to look at her, "God, I feel like a real jackass." A blackhole was growing in the pit of his stomach. "Your world was literally turned upside down and you needed help not--not some weird, bunker dwelling asshole making advances."

"Uh, Sam," At first George laughed; the absurdity of the hottest man on television apologizing for hitting on her struck her funny bone. However, when it registered just how sober the tone of his voice was, the reality of the situation hit her again like a ton of bricks. She realized that part of her was still anticipating Jared to break at some point and reveal all of this had been an elaborate set up. It hadn't occurred to her yet that, for Sam, this was all real. His sincerity touched her.

She swallowed down the rest of her laughter, along with her typical smartass response, and smiled kindly, "Thank you for the apology and I appreciate the thought, I really do, but it's not necessary. You had no idea, considering I lied to you--which I'm also sorry about if I haven't already said that." That last part came out quickly upon realizing she might not have apologized yet. He gave her a kind smile and waved her off gently, so she continued, "So, please don't feel guilty. And I'll let you know if your advances are ever unwanted. Promise."

The deja vu hit him again so hard it knocked the wind out of him. His eyes snapped up to meet hers from his spot on the floor. A blush creeped across her cheeks as he stared curiously. She was back on the roller coaster, butterflies tumbling in her gut, but forced herself to keep eye contact, allowing him to conduct his search. She wasn't sure what he was so determinedly looking for but she hoped he was finding it.

A mix of emotions wrestled within him at the moment. Though he knew logically it made no sense, he was having a harder and harder time denying that he knew this woman, intimately--in every sense of the word. But, how?! And, holy shit, was she saying what he hoped she was saying? He could feel his hopes skyrocketing while he struggled to hold them down in self-preservation.

A huge yawn broke out on her face, ruining the moment and snapping Sam out of his stupor.

"Whoa, Jesus," She laughed a bit, surprised by the force of the yawn.

"Time for bed?" Sam tried to mask his disappointment at the disruption. She nodded agreeably.

"Listen, could you at least take a pillow, please? One pillow? For me?" Pulling the sheets back, so she could climb in, she yanked a pillow out and tossed it over the edge of the bed. She heard it land with an audible POOMPF right on his face. "Oops," she said with a snicker, reaching over to turn off the lamp on the table while he adjusted the pillow behind his head.

Sliding up under the covers, she settled down on her back. The deafening silence in the room allowed her mind to wander freely while she stared up at the ceiling. After a moment she rolled onto her side and peeked over the edge of the bed, surprised to find Sam's beautiful hazel eyes staring intensely back at her in the dark.

She whispered, "Sam?"

"Yeah?" Came a soft, low rumble, as he continued to stare back.

"How did you find me?" She wondered.

"Uh…" He turned away from her quickly and shifted nervously. He felt compelled to be honest with her; luckily the shroud of darkness made him bolder than he would have been in the harsh light of day. "We tracked you through the cab company mostly. Lost your trail at the diner and then… I'm not really sure. We were driving around and when I saw the sign for the motel I… uh, just had a strong feeling that you were here?"

"...uh huh." His answer surprised her. So much so, that she had to break eye contact and lay back down. She stared at the ceiling in shock.

What did that mean?

Though even as she asked herself the question, she had a feeling that she already knew. It was a feeling that didn't exactly put her at ease; raising more questions than it answered. She mulled it over for a few moments, before deciding she was too tired to pull at that thread.

She finally shrugged a little and said, "Good instincts?"

"Yeah… that must be it," He trailed off, having a nearly identical conversation with himself, and they fell silent again.

"Sam?" She said, choking back a nervous laughter. When she heard him respond with a curious grunt she hesitated. Finally, she blurted in a quiet, definitive whisper, "Samgirl. No question." When she could hear the smile behind another, practically silent--as though he was trying to hide it--grunt of confirmation she smiled wide, adding quickly, "And just so you know, that is the first and last time you will ever hear me utter that silly term of my own volition."

"Understood," He murmured in a teasingly serious tone, making her laugh quietly.

With another big yawn, she forced herself to stop engaging. Before rolling over, she tossed over her shoulder, "And don't tell Dean. He'll be devastated and we have a job to do." The sound of his joyful chuckling was the last thing she heard before sleep overtook her.

[ktrsss1fics]

Concept: a drunk Georgiana ends up in Niall's bed and is insistent on cuddling with him he tries to resist her "not wanting to take advantage" even though cuddling isn't scandalous. This results in a blushy Niall that night and a flustered Georgiana the next morning who for some reason stays in Niall's arms after she wakes up and doesn't have the heart to leave. But what she doesn't know is Niall is awake too and knows she enjoys his warmth. 😂😂😂

YES!!!! This times 1000.

Niall wakes up first and like has an out of body experience almost in the form of Casper’s “There’s a girl…on my bed…”moment. But he realizes who that girl is and he has a near panic attack trying to figure out what happen. He knows he wasn’t as drunk as she was but he slept so hard that his brain is nowhere to be found and he’s trying to remember something from the night before. It slowly comes back to him as she’s starting to cuddle deeper into his body and he thinks it’s the cutest thing ever. He then starts to go through scenarios in his head of what could happen when she wakes up. A lot of them end up with her punching him in the face or her chewing him out so he decides he only has two options: stay awake and creep her out or pretend to be asleep allowing her to control the situation.

By the time little drunky Georgie wakes up, it’s like late morning. She feels her head moving slightly but she credits it to the hangover that was definitely going to be present after the amount of rum she drank the night before. She opens an eye slowly but gives up quickly until she realizes something. The color of the walls around her aren’t the weird shade of avocado green that they are supposed to be. She opens her eyes and is met with a large stretch of chest hair. Panic starts to set in as she tries to remember the night before but the only thing she remembers is watching Mags and Jenna fail at limbo in the backyard and she danced a bit too much with a certain someone. She didn’t know where she was or who she was on. She didn’t think she left the house but who knows.

She looks up slowly, praying to God that it wasn’t Keith’s body beneath her. When she sees Niall’s face a small sigh of relief escapes. But it’s not long before alarms are ringing in her head.

She was asleep on Niall’s naked chest. She shared a bed with a half naked Niall. She was wearing the shirt she planned to steal from him before they left Aruba.

She knew she needed to leave. She should be in the queen sized bed in her avocado colored room with an eye mask over her eyes. But he was keeping her warm. And he was kind of really comfortable and he smelled good.

And… he was awake.

That little fucker was faking it. She could tell by the way he was breathing. If this was a ploy to get her to stay in his bed longer, she wasn’t with it.

But then there was that little piece deep down inside of her that wanted to give Niall that moment. She’d been too mean to him in the past. She couldn’t just up and leave. What if something had happened the night before and she wasn’t there when he actually woke up. He would be devastated. She didn’t have the heart to reject him like that. She knew she had a few more minutes in her.

Meanwhile, Niall could feel her shift on top of him and that was a sign that she was awake. He knew he had about maybe less than five minutes of uninterrupted cuddle time before shit hit the fan. His heartbeat stars to speed up because he feels like she’s on to. He tries his hardest to stay asleep but something inside of him wants to see her reaction because he just knows the look on her face will be priceless. She’ll be pissed but that’s when he thinks she’s the cutest. And okay maybe his plan of pretending to be asleep wasn’t the brightest idea he’s had but he didn’t have the heart to move and wake her up.

As he tries to think of some fun fact about plants to ease the tension that was bound to appear once they both woke up, he notices something. She’s starting to play with the hair on his chest and it’s doing things to him. Like really good things. And that’s the last thing he needs right now.

Like fuck not only does he have to pretend to be asleep but now he has to prevent his little friend from waking up and joining the party.

Cold showers. James Corden dressed as Mary Poppins. That scene where Mufasa dies. Nothing’s working.

Her fingers delicately dancing across his skin is making him start to get hard. And he can’t handle it. The first time he gets to spend the entire night cuddling with the girl he’s fancied for over four years is about to be ruined by his selfish penis.

Just when he least expects it, three hairs are ripped from his chest and the jig is up. A very manly yelp escapes his lips sending her into a fit of laughter.

He looks down to find her watching him smugly. Before he can get anything out, the look on her face changes and he knows he has to explain but he kind of doesn’t want to. He just wants to relish in the moment for one more second.

Georgina just lets out a sigh and cuddles into his neck knowing he’ll tell her when he’s ready.

[warnerbro]

can't keep my hands to myself.

Boo: [So Boo's walking. FINALLY. He feels like he can run. He can, but he's supposed to take it easy. RigHT. He's out and about. Buying groceries. Cleaning his parent's house, working on the plants outside. I guess it's summer? Cilla's apparently has been around, and I'm sure they've agreed to hang out, which is what they are doing??? She walks up. There is a grin. Because it never fades okay. And somehow they've never touched upon that last conversation at lunch right? right. But I'm sure like Celine Dion it all came back, and yeah, Boo's totally remember why, how and exactly when he fell in love Cilla all over again. And it's painful, because he knows he should stay away but fight him, he won't. So she's walked up, Boo gives her a ~Hey, and crossed his arms over his chest.]

Cilla: [Cilla's walking a veRY thin line right now, heading over to Boo's parents' place again and again, especially with her fiance not knowing that that's what she's doing, but now that it was the position she'd put herself in, she couldn't imagine wanting to change it. It wasn't like she was doing anything wrong. They were just friends again, that was all. Donnie would freak out over just that, but that didn't make it wrong. Just friends. No big deal, right? None. So, she comes up to the house, and sees Boo, that big grin on his face as usual nowadays, and she gives a soft smile back.] ~Hey back.

Boo: So, i'm gonna need you to change your shoes. [he looks down at her feet.] No holes in my grass. Fresh new, nice grass. [There's a sigh and an ulterior motive. An idea in mind-- because member that one lake? they gOIN.]

Cilla: [She looked down in confusion, then right back up to Boo.] You say that like I bought an extra pair of shoes with me. [GOD THE LAKE I DIE.]

Boo: Well I'll just have to carry you then. [because when isn't he carrying Cilla at this point?]

Cilla: [And, as I'm sure it has multiple times in these past few months, her face heats up.] You're supposed to ~take it easy~, Boo.

Boo: [he shakes that big head of his,] Nope. Don't believe in that. Plus, I'm sure I could run a mile right now. But I did have some plans in mind. [ ... for us.......... to hang out.... only.... no other ideas... i swear. ]

Cilla: [She doesn't care, she still feels concern. Like, geez, dude. R E S T.] Plans, huh~? [There is a /hint/ of innuendo in her voice, but honestly, she doesn't mean for it to be that way.] Alright, then. Just don't hurt yourself.

Boo: [So he makes her cover her eyes the whole way fyi, though I'm sure she's been here reCENTLY WITH DONNIE IRPRIp, and I don't know how they get there. maybe cil just walks like a normal person, maybe boo carries her, maybe they take a car because i'm sure it's not actually walking distance but either way Cilla has a blindfold okay. And they arrive because fastFORWARD. ]

Cilla: [Her eyes are still covered I'm presuming, and she's getting this air of deja vu, because this has totally happened before, and she's being lead by Boo, I suppose. She has an idea of what this might be, because, okay, Boo. I see you. But not really, I'm blindfolded.] Can I take this off now?

Boo: HOld, on. Just a minute, Cil. [ so he hurrieS AND CIRCLES THE CAR, OPENS HER DOOR.] now. [REMOVES THE BLINDFOLD. AND LET'S SAY THERE IS A NICE SUNSET LAKE In FRONT OF HER GDI.]

Cilla: [The blindfold drops, and YUP, it's the lake. Good deja vu instincts. She gets this REALLy big smile on her face, because, no, she probably hasn't been here in awhile. Take that. Then she turns her smile from the pretty sunset, back to Boo.] You dweeb.

Boo: [car door slam.] Says the one who was just wearing a blindfold...............................

Cilla: [And she's just gonna INFORM HIM of the fact that it's been awhile.] I haven't been here in ages.

Boo: [So i'm gonna say they are walking towards now? he picks at some plants along the way sure.] Before I moved back home, I would have said the same thing. [ NEW YEARS EVE ] I had forgotten how great it is. How pretty the sky gets, when you're gone for so long you just lose a certain appreciation for some things [THINGS AND YA MAYBE HE MEAN SPEOPLE. OR ONE SPECIFIC ONE WHO IS RIGHT NEXT TO HIM MHM.]

Cilla: Yeah, it's gorgeous. [And she's nodding in agreement with him, and though Parrish sees that double meaning, Cilla does not.] It's like practically nothing's changed. Like, all this time, and it all feels-- looks the same.

Boo: [did i mention he's carrying a blanket, because he is. and they are gonna sit. okay. well he does at least. he leaves room for her. let's watch the sunset k. he nods at her words, though, I'm sure he disagrees to much of an extent. Things are completely changed. And somewhere along all of that time spent away from Cilla and the lake, it's almost too much of a memory that once was. It's something he definitely wants back, but he doesn't press.] It feels the same... [he agREES to tHA TFINE.]

Cilla: [Yup. And that's really all she meant. That it feels the same, but she backtracked on herself yikes. So, she takes a seat on the blanket, almost wearily, because, sitting on a blanket at sunset together? Yikes again. There she is, looking at the pretty sunset, contemplating what the hap is fuckening. She's gonna contemplate and enjoy the view. Sorry bro.]

Boo: [fine we can do silence. we can do painful silence. Because Boo can just sit on with her while contemplating ALL of his horrible life choices especially where they all started... which was ThanKSGIVING A LONG TIME AGO.]

Cilla: [Cilla is now growing tense under thIS WEIGHTY SILENCE, because silences... never good, man. Sometimes worse than screaming. Yup. She shifts a little uncomfortably, throwing a side-glance at Boo who doesn't really seem all that fazed by the fact that they are /just sitting there/. 12 years ago this would have been no problem; normal even. Now it spoke volumes more-- because was he in the middle of thinking too hard too? Geez. More silence growing on.]

Boo: [he feels said side glance, k, he chooses to ignore it for awhile, as his eyes are pressed on the sunset in front of him, but he's having his quiet time. Contemplation runs wild, because yes, he is thinking way too hard, as I'm sure he has been since he tore his god damned acl, and so finally addressing Cilla's side glace he speaks.] What..? [there's a half smile half laughter because stop being weird]

Cilla: [She's torn away from her hap fuckenings because of Boo's voice, and so she turns to him, shifting yet again so she's angled towards him fully.] I'm just-- thinking. I don't know.

Boo: Oh. [he sighs a little too contently because nothign can ruin this moment for him. okay. he's happy. watching the sunset with his old best friend.] Penny for your thoughts?

Cilla: [She sighs, not so contently, because she's SO LIKE, WTF TO EVERYTHING, AND SHE CAN'T GET OVER IT.] I... don't know, Boo. I don't know. I'm thinking about too much. I don't know.

Boo: So... stop thinking? [ya because life's so easy when you're boo warner.]

Cilla: [Nothing but a straight up look of 'are you joking'?]

Boo: [he laughs.] Fine. [retract because bad advise.] What are you thinking about?

Cilla: [She pauses. What exactly does she want to divulge about her thoughts? Geez.] I don't know. This. Right now. Everything. I don't know.

Boo: [it doesn't occur to him, any one of her thoughts. They do not occur to him, because all this time it was one sided. His resurfacing memories-- it was just his guilt, his regret all coming back.] I... [hopefully it was.] I feel it too. [ he picks at some grass at the edge of the blanket I'ms ure.]

Cilla: ... What do you feel? [that's what you get. just that.]

Boo: Just... Memories. [there's a shrug.] That's it. [downcast look. he goes quiet because that's what you get.]

Cilla: [She sighs, because she thought maybe she was getting somewhere as far as him explaining why she was suddenly someone he wanted to see after all of this time, but, of course. No dice. So, maybe she needed to be more straightforward?] Boo... It's not like it was. That's-- clear. What-- What changed? [she didn't even look at him asking this question. I'm sure the sun's down by this point. I guess, so like, harder to see facial expressions now.]

Boo: ["What's changed?"] Ha. [There's a chuckle, a silent one, and maybe only air comes out of his mouth, as that question completely baffles him.] I think that's the thing. [he stares off into the sunset, as I'm sure they are avoiding eye contact.] Nothing ever changed for me, Cilla.

Cilla: [She shakes her head at that, too quickly. Way too quickly, like she's trying to press the escape button on the metaphorical computer of life, yes.] No, don't... Don't say that. You--... [she paused, taking in a breath. and suddenly she became much more serious. more allie on a dock in the rain kind of serious.] Then why? Why didn't you try to fight for me? Why didn't you say something-- other than-- other than how much you couldn't stand me. I know I didn't make it easy, but--... but that didn't change anything for me either! [we are the epitome of allie rn.]

Boo: You didn't make it easy??? You didn't make it easy? Ha. You made it really god damn hard, Cilla! [gives her an ARE YOU SERIOUS look because?!?] You'd made up your mind about me based off of one stupid mistake. [hands in his hair old boo warner is coming because omg he's gonna puLL HIS HAIR OUT ALL OVER AGAIn.]

Cilla: You don't have to remind me of the things I did. I remember. And I know all the things I said, and I know all the things I did, Boo, but... Just because I said one thing, it didn't mean that it was over for me. And it wasn't. It wasn't over for me! And I waited for you for /so long/. But now it's-- [she glances down at her engagement ring and then back to Boo.] it's too late. [she shrugs, probably holding back patented Cilla tears.]

Boo: Well guess what, Princess, it wasn't over for me, either. [deADPAn.] If that wasn't completely obvious. No matter what you did, no matter how much I tried to... No matter which Rocket got in the way...[ his weight on his now shakey palms bcs hearing this is, let's be completely honest, is music to Boo's ears. Not her tears-- though, he sure was used to them by now, but GDI, that was all he needed to hear for what was to come next.] It's not too late. [ shaking his HEAD BCS NOPE, and just to show her that is completely undeniably not over, he's gonna grab that stupid pretty face of hers and kiss those god damn lips.]

Cilla: [The back of Cilla's mind was screaming, but there was an even louder screaming coming from the front of her mind, blocking the things in the back that were saying 'stop while you're ahead'. Because, honestly, all she'd wanted to hear all these years were those words coming from him. She was ready to respond, but before she could realize what was going on, Boo was kissing her. And as much as she wanted to tell herself that she should stop, she couldn't. She just pressed further into him, because it'd been 12 years too long, man.]

Boo: [HERE WE GO AGAIN. With his hands in Cilla's hair there is some much kissing going on. and on a blanket, in front of the lake and the sun is going down. She's pressed all to close, and his heart is beating so hard and loud in his chest, that the only way to silence it, was too pull her closer. Yes, he'd die happy, there, and then, rolling around on a blanket and kissing the love of his life RIP.]

Cilla: [THERE IS BLANKET ROLLING AND SO MANY KISSING, and yes, all thoughts except for the ones about book warmer are all gone from her mind, just like that. She's weak, swooning even. But, nope. We can't continue this here. Because book warmer needs to do some lifting in this situation. SO. She pulls back, almost a mirror from Christmas, minus the snow. But that same ~look~ is there.] Take me back to your house.

Boo: [and as much as Boo wants to go on, as much as he wanted to continue everything good that was going on there on that goddamn blanket. He doesn't. All he needed was that one kiss to prove Cilla was right, and he got it, right? And maybe that oNE just so happened to turn into more than a kiss, and maybe she WAS looking at him with those big beautiful eyes, so just like normal old Cilla Dodgeson always had-- she left him breathless, weak, and completely under her spell. Huffing for air, and trying to still his heart, he nodded. So he stopped. He shook his head, he pulled away, and let out an inaudible groan and himself sure. He stared at her. His lips on a raging fire because they had been deprived of something so great, but rose to his feet, and held out his hand for her. like come on let's go find a kitchen table instead.]

Cilla: [So, without another word, she grabbed his hand and stood from the blanket. Logic, at this point, is all but turned off for Cilla, as it tended to do when it came to *coughcough* physicality with Boo Warner. So, she waited for him to lead the way, breathin all heavy, and all excited for the kitchen table. Yup.]

Boo: [So he leads her to the car, holding her hand all the way there. He stop to open the car door for her, but I'm just gonna say before letting her step in he gives her one more kiss. just becAUSE HE CAN. So the car ride I'm sure is going to be painfully silent, and so they arrive back home. Boo pulls into the drive way, and ya he's going to sit there and stare at her again. Keys out of the ignition. He sighs and plants them eyes on her, and gives her a look, like are we doing this.]

Cilla: [She doesn't ALLOW herself to turn her thinking back on, even while she's just sitting in the car. That would be far too dangerous. But, when the car stops, and Boo just looks at her, she reads that unspoken question, and with the biggest sigh, she says nothing, but she just grabs him by the shirt and pulls him towards her, pressing lips together, and holding that kiss for at least twelve long, hard seconds. Then she pulls back, raising an eyebrow like, 'dOES THAT ANSWER YOUR QUESTION']

Boo: [Boo Warner had never felt so in over his head in his life, that was until Cilla kissed him once more. Just as a car ride was easy to calm him, there were her lips to remind him of everything he had missed out on. And as cruel that reminder happened in a car of all places, the look in her eyes sealed his fate. So she pulled away, and he pulled on the car door handle, and he was out in a matter of seconds, because there was no more waiting. they weren't kids anymore, there wasn't time to waste. He had a lady to kiss, even more, so when he circled back around the car to meet her, he pressed his lips so hard against hers, that sure she was raised up, and sure he was definitely lifting her up and it wasn't BEFORE LONG UNTIL makING OUT against the car got old, so there they go ACROSS THE ThreSHOLD OF HTE WARMER RESIDENCE, and torn acl? NOPE, against, the car, against the front doorway, and YEP.]

Cilla: [Again, everything seemed to be calling back to when they were teenagers. The car, the way she felt, the way she was being lifted up into Boo's arms, the fear that something was going to interrupt them. Everything was the same. She was no longer in control. Every action was a reaction to Boo, and yup, she was against a doorway. Was she now trying to get clothes off? You guessed it. Difficult, given she's pressed against a door. But she's trying with all of her might to get some form of clothing off. Oooooooh boy.]

Boo: [Where were his clothes? Mostly gone, yep. Her's? Surely, some were being ripped off now? And where were they? It was hard to keep track from all the bumping into furniture, and into hallways and out of them. There weren't words to express 1. how passionately, 2. how carefully, and 3. how intensely that boy-- or rather full grown man was handling that lady. There were too many emotions boiling over and he'd be cruel to stiffle any of it from that woman, so he didn't. With every kiss, with every touch, with every breath, he made sure that she was aware of how exactly he was feeling, felt, and would always feel. As there were so many emotions for her in the past- he'd admired her, he loved her, he hated her, but in every moment of his life, he'd always just wanted her. He was thankful that there on that kitchen table she was giving herself to him, or rather-- just her clothing, sh, in returen and surely if she wanted to she could take his heart and lock it away in that old locket of hers, seal it shut, and toss away the key. Just like their first time, just like every other time they had spent together with their bodies entwined it would never be enough to fully express how much that wonderful human being meant to him. So he placed careful nibbles at the nape of her neck as the wooden table served as a pillow to his head, I GUESS>]

Cilla: [Her head was swimming. With what? Too many things, and all of them about how she was feeling in this moment. Emotionally, that is. (Though...) She couldn't keep track of where they were, where various pieces of clothing had fallen, when the last time she took a breath in was... She was lost; one hundred percent, completely lost. And, really, it all felt too much like a dream. (One that she'd had-- too many time over the past 12 years.) But it had to be real. It had to. Because while it felt like a dream, it also felt too /real/ to not be reality. The dreams never felt like this; never had this much pure emotion. Because, suddenly, she was sixteen again, and every touch Boo gave felt like the first one all over again, and it was like she was floating. Because, everything made her remember just /how much/ it had never been over, or would ever be over. It made her realize that this was an inevitability. So, when his lips moved to her neck, giving her a chance to speak, though completely breathless, here we go--] I want to make you-- forget you've ever /ever/-- been with anybody else. It's just me.

Boo: [She spoke, and her words sent tingles up his spine. TINGLES. HELP. BUT Little did she know that it was already just her. Or it would be, from now until he was old and dead. Nail in the coffin, as he nodded, because, Princess, go on, and make me forget, k. so in between breaths his lips found their way back to hers, and his hands surely pinned hers against that stupid dumb kitchen table-- until finally he scooped her back up in his arms and they were moving again, and headiNG toWARDS THE BEDROOM. with her legs wrapped tightly around his waist, help bye. ican't]

Cilla: [Ups-a-daisy she goes, wrapped up around him again in a lovely quick trip to the bedroom, with lots of kisses along the way. Then she's on a bed, and now that she's not pinned down somewhere, she's going to take this opportunity to roll herself on top, and this is where the forgetting starts, because boy howdy, she's not a little sixteen year old anymore, damn it. She is a GROWN-ASS WOMAN, and she knows what she's doing. So, her hands are going to his hair, and her lips are going to his neck. And forget chaste pecks, son. That's not happening here. Nope. The goal here is to leave Cilla marks. M a n y Cilla marks. This is her territory. Deal with it.]

Boo: [So, sure, there they went, crashing down into the soft mattress, or rather-- there went Boo. He was joined,of course, and in her natural state, Cilla Dodgeson was driving Boo Warner completely insane. Mark after each and every mark, he grew restless, and it probably showed as his fingers were completely tangled in her hair. So he dealt with it. Yeah, because he had to, but it wasn't for long, as he was determined to rip the remaining clothes off of that woman. And once they were, he kissed her once more. It was a peck of a kiss, and he pulled away to catch his breath, but somewhere in between, his eyes landed on hers, and even more so, it all came flooding back. The memories. That feeling inside of him, that juvenille, young feeling of complete happiness-- the one feeling he'd lost so long ago, when he lost her. It came back. So he stared for as long as patience allowed, until he finally kissed her, tenderly as he pressed her closer to him and definitely rolling them over and definitely bye]