#thoughtsfromwithin

[marsog993]

Your environment and the people you choose to surround yourself with are essential to your growth, progress, success, peace, and sanity. Experiencing this first hand was a complete trip all on its own. I had to meet the worst of me just to want to meet the best of me. It wasn’t easy and every day is still a struggle. I had help, don’t be afraid to ask for or be too prideful to receive help if any kind. But never stop learning. Never stop maturing. Never stop loving. And if you do, it’s okay. But keep going. I promise it does get better. Never stop. Never settle. How do you plan on overcome your biggest struggles? #evolving #thoughtsfromwithin #brainatmaxcapacity #avoidinghomework #byreevaluatingmywholelifelol https://www.instagram.com/p/Bp3m2UDgUO-/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=cemmcjr20n70

[alyssayawn27]

don’t compete, just love

i’ll never be able to compete with someone so beautiful. she is beautiful and i am not. my soul, however, is the most beautiful part about me. what i lack in outer beauty, i make up in my humor. my kindness. my awkwardness. my joy. as much damage as the world has done to me, i won’t let it touch the deep parts of my soul. i can’t promise you that i’ll be beautiful like her, but i can promise to stay up with you and talk about what bothers you, what interests you, what keeps you up at night. i can promise to always be dorky with you, and watch cheesy movies and make fun of each other with you. i can promise to cook with you and dance around the kitchen to music with you. i can promise to cry with you at your hardest times, and smile with you at your greatest times. you see, i promise to be your best friend. i’ll always be there for you, even if you do choose beauty. that’s what the world is all about, outer beauty. but if you ever want what’s inside, i can guarantee it’ll still be there.

[vibrantlifelover-blog]

[spanish-star]

In the end all that will matter is if we have the courage follow our heart, to listen to the voice of our soul and if we are able to stand up and live authentically for ourselves, and the ones we love. Don't be afraid to be your best self, to live your best life, to live your truth and chase your dreams. ❤ #thoughtsfromwithin

[lovercomeoverx]

Thoughts...

Some times when I look at my self hard enough in the mirror I actually think I'm pretty hell even beautiful. But not the times when I'm all dolled up with make up and when my hair is flawless . Because let's be honest that's isn't the real me . That isn't the me when I'm late at night so trapped in a novel or when my hair is all tangled from late night cramming . That's the me I find so beautiful so peaceful , so naïve about the world around me . Some times I wished people saw me as that girl not the one wearing all the makeup trying to hard to fit In , in a town where she doesn't belong .

[exo-stranger]

Well

Being a Pisces sucks sometimes..

[exo-stranger]

Pen Pals

I’m learning Finnish and I want to find a pen pal from Finland. To aid in my learning and such. How would I find one?

Sigh..

[exo-stranger]

Absence

Something is missing in me. I don't know what it is though. Like a piece to a puzzle that is missing. Without it, you will never be complete. You can look everywhere for that piece, but still no luck. Unsure of where to look next and feeling more broken grows. *sighs* I'm lost.

[exo-stranger]

It's Been Awhile..

I haven't been feeling like posting thoughts from within for a bit. I've been sorta battling a darkness. (Everyone has their own battles to fight. Inner demons, etc,.)

Anywho, you finally get hit in the head telling  that you have a sickness and it's effecting your life around you. Your family, love life, school, etc,.

It's hard trying to come to terms with it but eventually you just have to accept it. Next comes explaining and asking for help. Asking for help is harder than it seems. Especially if you're the type of person who never asks for help instead you help others around you. 

I didn't realize that this was happening around me. I just got smacked in the face. So I ended up being dropped from 3 of my classes. I just got to the point where I didn't want to get out of bed and face the day. I did get up to tend to my son but that was mainly it.

Anyways, I might write more later about how it was for me. Instead now, I need to start cleaning and picking up things in my path so I can start to overcome this. 

-Dee

[exo-stranger]

Oh.

Oh..you're back again. That feeling. Long time, no see my old friend. *Sighs* ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I just don't know. I.. Well.. *runs fingers through hair* ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Tyhjyys

[exo-stranger]

I didn't know..I'm sorry..

Oh how a soul can ache..

[exo-stranger]

Within

I have all of these emotions swirling around inside. All swirling and molding into this heavy, empty feeling inside. It feels like the sound of dead quiet. When there is no noise at all, it’s so quiet that you can hear your own heartbeat quiet. That’s the feeling inside me. The quiet, emptiness pounding and pulsing, radiating through my entire chest. It makes me tired. Always feeling this way; I just need rest. No matter how much sleep I get, I’m still tired. I just..I don’t know.

[exo-stranger]

Gandering

*Helen Jane Long plays softly in the background*

I've been searching for a tapestry to hang up on the back sliding glass doors of my house. I'm not having any luck finding the one I'm looking for. It seems like I'm picky. Honestly, it's a "you will know it when you see it" type of feelings. I know when I do find it, I will love it. When I look at it, its colors will be so rich and vibrant. With warm reds and dark purples mixed with some sliver. I hope to come across what I'm looking for soon. If it had a voice it would yell "hello! I'm over here!!'

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*sighs*

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Maybe I am just too picky. It feels like it's more of it choosing me instead of the opposite way around. Maybe that's weird put it feels right to me. I guess that's all that matters. If it feels right and makes you happy,if it matters to you then why should anyone one else's opinions matter? I guess what I am trying to say is that if it makes you happy then acquire it. 

Does that even make sense? It does to me, but the more I re-read wrote I said it gets more and more confusing....

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I'm getting lost in my head. 

*sighs*

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*rubs eyes*

I think I will retire for the night. Goodnight.

-Dee

[exo-stranger]

Making Sense

No matter how hard I try, the feeling never goes away. No matter how much drugs I take or how much alcohol I drink. (I've stopped doing both so don't jump to conclusions.) It's still there. Gnawing away at me. I'm tired of fighting it. It's winning more and more each day. I have a loving husband and a beautiful baby boy, but yet not even they can make the feeling go away. And that breaks my heart more. I wish feelings didn't exist or that I could just shut them off whenever I wanted. I know expressing my thoughts on here may seem like I'm wanting attention or such, but honestly, it's nice just getting some of the crazy out of my head, for just even a little bit. I haven't posted anything personal in a while, due to working constantly and being a full time parent. Am I selfish for feeling this way? I have so many things on my mind that I constantly worry about and then the more I think, the more I worry. Worry, worry, worry. I'm always getting told to "stop worrying all the time." I just reply with, "I know." But in my mind I'm screaming, "Do you know how hard it is for a person with a mind like mine to not worry about every single little thing?!" 

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*sighs* 

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This whole post makes no sense. Even as I reread it, it still made no sense. But nothing that I say or think makes sense. Oh well.

-Dee

[exo-stranger]

...

I'm going to die by my own hands. My fate is already set in motion.