#tinder nightmares

[agentmarcuspike]

this is me giving up on dating forever

that’s his first message to me. whatever happened to hello. his profile showed up and i was like “oh nice finally someone who looks like a cool dude” and he immediately sends me this lmao

[im-just-that-gay]

When a girl from tinder accuses you of ghosting for failing to text her for a day, so you text her everyday for a week and then try to set up a date but then she stops replying and ghosts you...

[its-tortle]

go on tinder, they said. i met my boyfriend there, they said

[cats-and-cacti]

Tinder wrapped

You ghosted 53 people!

You went on 3 really awkward first dates and 1 kinda ok second date… Slay queen!

You were ghosted by 35 people: 20 on the app and 15 after getting their contact info. Better luck next time!

You swiped left on 192282 straight men even though you explicitly set your settings to not see them

You were asked to be a third 14 times… way to go!

[catboymoments]

must we fend off your besotted followers with sword and shield, my liege

Nay. I fancy the jest

[eosphorusss]

literally what is the point of pickup lines through text. irl they can help break the ice but when you’re texting… what am i supposed to respond.

[lesvieuxjoursart]

Distinguished Cockney gent seeks companionship

[mercurytrinemoon]

Venus entered Libra and my sister is making weird allusions to me finding a boyfriend through tinder or something. Not only that but she says maybe I should make myself more digestable to potential love interests

I mean.... excuse me??????

[agentmarcuspike]

ugh ziggy, men can be so GROSS. the absolute WORST. i wouldn’t even know where to begin telling you about all of the ✨colorful✨ messages i’ve received on dating apps (though i will give some of them points for creativity, i wasn’t aware my wheelchair could be so provocative 😂)

i wish i had more words of wisdom but i feel you, babe 💛

god, you're so right..... i imagine with something as visible as a wheelchair the comments can be....... even wilder (negative). thank you for the empathy, i extend it back to you ♡ stay strong and safe out there

also, one time this guy just said "can i tell you a secret? promise you won't be mad" and then proceeded to confess he's masturbated to my pictures, which he reeeeeally didn't need to share with me :') idk what i'm still doing on there to be honest, hahaha

[merobot]

The only way I know how to flirt is by talking slightly differently and that doesn’t work online lol I’m also very bad at taking hints I’m pretty dense sometimes and it can take me a while to get used to a new person

[its-tortle]

where do men get the AUDACITY

[spiderteeths]

most insufferable person on tinder award

[obstinatebird]

The number of Zach/ks on tinder is, frankly, unreal

[girl-bateman]

I've been having a lot of dreams where im in secure and loving relationships, holding hands with my girl and cuddling and being generally wholesome, and its just......... nice but so weird bc im just waiting for the other shoe to drop and for my dreams to return to their usual gore-torture 😐 like this little lovey dovey fantasy is nice but it kinda feels like a trap ngl

[mejomonster]

I gotta. Learn how to date again ;-;

[tinightmares]

You better watch out,

You’ll definitely cry,

Run don’t pout,

I’m telling you why,

Santa Pat is coming to town…

and your chimney isn’t the only thing he’s trying to slide down.