#to her the ends (purifying the Shikon Jewel and living a normal life with InuYasha) justified the means

[mustardyellowsunshine]

Kay I’m very curious about your opinion on this but I hadn’t read the manga in like quite some time and I’m rereading it, and many in the fandom talk about how kikyo actually wasn’t bad or people just misunderstand her, but now that I’m rereading she tried on multiple occasions to kill Kagome or leave her for dead. I guess I just don’t understand if kikyo is so good why she tried to kill kagome or leave her to die with no real reason other than what seems like petty ones

'Nony, your timing is honestly amazing. I had literally just finished reading the chapter with Kikyo's final death scene, and I was sitting in my thoughts and feelings about her character, and then this popped into my inbox. Synchronicity! Freaky.

Anyway, I've been an on-again, off-again active participant in the InuYasha fandom since 2002 (20 years?!! oh crikey, existential crisis incoming). In that time I've seen the Opinion Pendulum™ swing from absolutely villainizing Kikyo's character to the other extreme of dismissing people who are insufficiently effusive about how much they love Kikyo (the sentiment being, "if you say or imply anything even mildly critical of Kikyo's character then you're a Kikyo hater and it's not a good look, you should really grow up").

Which is to say, the Kikyo discourse has always been annoying. In my opinion, there hasn't been nearly enough nuance brought into discussions about Kikyo's character, or enough honest recognition that she simply is morally ambiguous for a good chunk of the series (and that it's indeed okay to find a fictional character's moral ambiguity off-putting, but we gotta whisper that part apparently).

I mean, I'll be honest off the bat: I've always been pretty apathetic to Kikyo's character. I don't hate her, I don't love her: she's there, and I could take her or leave her. 🤷🏼‍♀️ That said, I've never read her as evil. If pressed, I'd summarize her character this way: she's morally gray until she isn't.

Kikyo certainly starts off as an antagonist (there are few other ways to read a character who tries on several occasions to kill the two main protagonists), so you're not wrong to see her character in that light, especially if you're still in the early series. But as the series progresses, Kikyo slowly becomes more of a gray character, still motivated by self-interest and bitterness over her (unquestionably tragic and shitty) lot in life, but less antagonistic to Kagome and InuYasha. (She actually tries to stay out of their way for a good chunk of the middle series, which bothers InuYasha at some points, but anyway.) She then disappears "off screen" for arcs upon arcs at a time, and when she does pop back in, we often see her helping out random villagers or other side characters; by this point, her motivations are noticeably less self-driven (less resentful, less angry), and her focus is largely on defeating Naraku. By the end of the series, Kikyo has become an ally to our main protagonists, in that she's trying her best to take out their mutual enemy. Regardless of one's opinion on her methods of defeating Naraku, her intention is clearly to take him out with as little collateral damage as possible (e.g., her efforts to spare Koga and Kohaku while still trying to collect their Shikon shards). Now, I personally do think her methods are morally suspect, but what's interesting is that by the end of the series, so does she—Kikyo has second thoughts about her plan to defeat Naraku precisely because it could hurt others. It's a far cry from the Kikyo we see immediately after her resurrection.

And that disparity between intention and results? That's another reason Kikyo feels morally gray. Her ultimate intentions may be "good," but her methods often aren't. And that sort of disparity is both realistic (I think most people have experience with good intentions that went astray, y'know?) and interesting. It gives layers and colors to a character.

I've always thought Kikyo's modus operandi throughout most of the series represented her biggest character flaw: she thinks the ends justify the means. She isn't actively malicious, but she's not afraid to cause harm (specifically to Kagome, and to a lesser degree InuYasha) if it'll get her closer to her goals. Again, that changes at the end of the series when she starts to doubt her plans, but for the majority of the series I think "the ends justify the means" accurately describes her motivations and behaviors.

I.e., Kikyo is morally gray until she isn't.

When it comes down to it, her character development isn't much different from other antagonists in the series, like Sesshomaru, Kagura, Koga, etc. I actually think Kikyo and Sesshomaru's respective character arcs are remarkably similar, in that their progression is essentially: obvious antagonist -> extremely morally gray -> slightly less morally gray -> unlikely ally.

(I also happen to be pretty apathetic to Sesshomaru as a character — I'm sensing a pattern here.)

Anyway, I personally think people who want to classify Kikyo as "evil" have it wrong, and people who want to classify Kikyo as "good but misunderstood" have it wrong too. She's more ambiguous and complex than that. She's selfish. She's tragic. She's a victim who suffers something unimaginable. She herself victimizes innocent people (mostly Kagome). She can't really be pigeonholed.

And I also think it's perfectly fine to dislike her. 🤷🏼‍♀️ She is a fictional character, her feelings will not be hurt if you just don't like her. Her antagonism in the early series makes it hard for a lot of people to like her. If her character leaves a bad taste in your mouth, and her changed behavior in the middle/end of the series feels unearned/poorly developed, then just keep disliking her. Who cares? You can feel however you want to about a fictional character.

My personal feelings about Kikyo are much the same as my feelings for side characters like Sesshomaru: she's there, she's more interesting in the beginning of the series than she is in the middle/the end, I think her character wasn't developed especially well, her presence in the story was dragged out too long and it felt like Rumiko Takahashi didn't really know what to do with her....

And I also try to keep in mind that InuYasha was a weekly, monster-of-the-week shounen series, that Rumiko Takahashi wasn't necessarily concerned with long-term narrative or character development, and then I try to modify my expectations accordingly.

[wolfylady]

Bonds

Disclaimer: As this is a work of fanfiction, I hold no claim to the characters that belong to their beloved and recognized creators. I am nothing more than a humble fanfiction writer.

Summary: A Bon and Kagome kind of story. Where they both like each other, but the secrets Kagome keeps may scare him away. And with her at the Academy things might go a little differently.

Pairing: Kagome/Bon, one-sided Mephisto/Kagome, suggestive Kagome/Rin, possessive/abusive/one-sided Sesshomaru/Kagome, and past Inuyasha/Kagome.

~Story Time~

A yellow glow poorly lit the room, while sunshine streamed in through the aged windowpane further brightening the darkly designed room. The tile on the floors were done in a chess-like fashion of black and dark crimson. Harsh gold decorated the fixtures of the room while deep forest green colored the wall with crimson accents. A large overused chalkboard sat at the front of the room just beyond the teacher's desk that rest on a raised platform. Throughout the room were pale wooden tables meant to seat two to three students at a time.

The room was empty of life besides a single student who currently was going over the days materials. Raven hair fell to frame a heart-shaped face that currently looked at the book in front of them in a bored scowl. Her youthful figure dressed in a girls uniform. The pale pink skirt fell to her mid-thigh while black socks came up just two inches below the skirt, covering the pristine white of her shirt was a cream colored blazer with pale pink lining the hem of the collar and sleeves while golden buttons held it closed. Finishing the outfit was a black girlish bow with thin red stripes that matched the emblem adorning her blazer identifying that she was a student of True-Cross Academy.

While she was a student at the infamous school, where she currently sat was in one of the many classrooms of the exorcist cram-school. The cram-school was an interesting place, full of interesting people who either were, or wanted to be, exorcists. Everyone had their reason to be here, Kagome was no different, although hers could be considered less than honorable. After all she had been consorting with demons, ones who desire the eradication of the Vatican order and currently were in the process of manipulating the order to their will.

Sapphire eyes sparkled with shades of amethyst streaking across her vision, the young miko had started at True-Cross Academy and it's special cram school a week after her journeys amongst the feudal era ended. 

Her quest had ended within five years of her jumping back and forth through time. The jewel had been completed with the aid of her friends, their revenge satiated, and the world a better place without the evil half-demon Naraku. With her goodbyes in order Kagome had then been abruptly sent back to her birth-time, where she discovered no time had truly past. It was her fifteenth birthday, she thought herself insane, but there waiting for her at the shrine steps were the few friends that could survive the 500 years that separated them.

What she learned, in the years given back to her, was that time was a fickle being who's amusement came with a price, good or bad depending on who you ask.

Ginta and Hakkaku, and even Kouga, welcomed her in a rush, their arms engulfing her in a group hug while crying over their pack sister's return. Following them was Ayame, she hugged the younger woman with a soft greeting of welcome.

Next was Inuyasha, he grumbled at the wolf demons, saying they overreact before hugging her just as fiercely. Although his appearance was no longer that of silver hair and puppy-dog ears, those having been replaced by a facade of soft black hair so as to pass for human, he was still the same half-demon who had become her best friend and protector.

Shippo and Kirara than greeted her. The two-tail neko perching herself on the young woman's shoulder to nuzzle her cheek. Where as the now teen kitsune kissed her face and hugged her, all while “crying”. She giggled tearfully while he spouted about missing her, that he should have greeted her first as he loved her the most.

Then it was Sesshomaru, even with his demonic markings hidden, and silver mane now black as it fell to the nape of his neck, the daiyoukai was as intimidating as ever. Even so she hugged him at the waist, his clawed hand caressing her hair to show that their reunion meant just as much to him.

From there on she was welcomed back into the strange pack they created.

Sesshomaru insisted she attend True-Cross Academy, and her mother agreed thinking it was a type of scholarship- having no memories of Kagome's adventures. Only when in private did the daiyoukai tell her of the extra curricular classes she'd be joining. And that's how Kagome; the miko who transcended time, and embodied the Shikon no Tama, ended up at the academy as a spy.

Of course the school was splendid, most of the students belonging to richer families, so it made sense that the education she was receiving was immaculate and extensive. By the time she completed her studies, there wouldn't be a university that could deny her entrance.

The only problem she was finding with the cram school; their information on demons was biased, sometimes completely wrong, and focused only on the destruction of said demons. That no doubt steaming from the Vatican which controlled the school, their goal was to create hate for demons and destroy them. Little did the exorcists know that the demons they despised so much were already infiltrating their precious order. Demons were everywhere, in every rank, strong ones that looked, acted, almost felt human, if not for her abilities she would believe them to be too. From everything she'd witnessed it looked like the demons were effectively overtaking the Vatican and exorcist order.

Soon the world would be as it once was. Without the order, the demons could live as they once were; free. Kagome wouldn't have to hide her powers anymore, if the order found out they'd try and use her as a weapon. She was the embodiment of the jewel, housing the powers and abilities of both demons and mikos, and in this world controlled by the order she would never be safe. Only when the order was gone could she and all demons have the freedom to live as they were without consequence for simply existing. 

Such thoughts of freedom and peace made her happy and hopeful for the future.

“Hey Kagome, what you smiling about?”

Turning Kagome looked up into the warm chestnut eyes of her closest friend at the academy: Ryuji “Bon” Suguro. Ryuji had a beautiful mind, and spirit, but one look at the delinquent-looking adelence would have anyone walking in the opposite direction. Several piercings marked his ears, while his brown hair was styled shaggily atop his head, a small amount of facial hair graced his chin and jaw. He looked like a punk, and perhaps he did it on purpose, but she could feel the gentle pulse of his soul and witnessed his absurd brilliance when they spoke.

She beamed happily at the taller boy. “I was just thinking about my family,” it wasn't exactly a lie. Kagome often thought of them, her demonic and human family, it was hard being without them but at least she had Kirara.

As if sensing her thoughts, the neko purred from her place on the girl's shoulder, gently butting her head against Kagome's jaw.

“Breaks about to start, and then we'll be starting high school,” he grinned, hand falling to scratch behind Kirara's ears, making the feline purr loudly in greeting.

They both had entered True-cross's cram-school about the same time, while he would be coming to the school as a high schooler. Because they were always in the same class it made sense that they became at least civil with one another but Kagome had been the one to change that to friendship. They were the others only friend while in school.

“You said your friends will be joining you this year,” even though she was happy for him, to be with his childhood friends, she feared that their friendship would fade because of it, they were only cram-school friends after all. Kagome had left behind her human friends, not wanting to pull them into her complicated life, which made him her only friend outside her pack.

He nodded. “Konekomaru Miwa and Renzo Shima, they've been my friends since I was little,”

She offered a small smile. “And they'll be joining the cram school?”

He smiled back. “Yeah, though I doubt they know what they want to be,” The boy was brilliant but had held off on much of his schooling so that the three would become exorcists together, he only went to the cram-school part-time leaving him as a temptaint-less page. So to him, Kirara was a cat, not a familiar, he couldn't see her demonic attributes. 

She laughed nervously. “Unlike you Bon, I still haven't decided on what Meister I am going for,” her eyes going to the book in front of her. Today in class they would be going over the five Meister categories. There were several that she could do and that would come naturally to her (Doctor, Dragoon, Knight, and Tamer), but had yet to make a decision -probably need to talk to Sesshomaru- unlike Ryuji who was going for Aria and Dragoon.

“I'm sure it will come to you. Personally I think you'd make a good doctor. I swear you can heal people with a touch,” he praised, taking the seat next to her. 

Kagome blushed, a nervous laugh escaping her. It only seemed that way because it was true. The young priestess technically had almost six years of training, five in the feudal era, and her miko powers gave her the ability to heal and purify with a literal touch to a person. “You give me too much praise,”

“Not at all,” without her notice, heat rose into his cheeks, giving them a pink hue. “You deserve it, and besides we'd make a good team no matter what you pick because I'll always have your back,"

Both teens were now blushing, even as they continued on as usual, completing their normal homework before going over their extracurricular schoolwork for the day.

Time passed quickly, and soon class was in session. It being the last class before break the teens were forced to say goodbye when it ended. Next time they saw the other they'd be in their first year of high school. 

Turning away Bon went home while Kagome went to her private dorm, no one knew as Mephisto pulled some strings to do it upon Sesshomaru's request; so he and their pack could come and go as they please.

Arriving at her room, Kirara riding her shoulder, Kagome was surprised to find not only Sesshomaru but Mephisto. The first sat in her chair, regal even in such an everyday setting, while the other sat atop her desk with his legs crossed.

“Hello Kaggie-chan,” Mephisto greeted cheekily. Kagome growled lowly at the demon, a fang spilling over her bottom lip.

Before she could reprimand the Demon King of Time, Sesshomaru raised his hand, stopping the fight before it could begin. “Now is not the time for your bickering,”

“It's more like a lovers-quarrel,” Mephisto sighed dramatically, again Kagome growled.

“Enough,” raising his voice, Kagome froze while Mephisto wilted in his position taking on a pout.

“My apologies, what can I do for you, Sesshomaru?”

“You will be taking the exorcist exam,” Golden eyes narrowing. “Tonight,”

“What!? Why?”

This is where Mephisto piped up. “I'll be requiring you as an exorcist rather shortly, and it would make things much easier for me Kaggie-chan to have an exorcist I can trust. I'll be able to use you as a spy on top of already being a spy! A double spy!”

Her brow twitched, a hand coming to cradle her forehead already able to feel the beginnings of a migraine. “Please explain,”

“As an exorcist, you will have more privileges, and be trusted with high-security information,” a glimmer spread across his emerald eyes making her nervous at the maliciousness they held.

“And because I order you to,” Sesshomaru added, eyes hard showing she had no choice.

With a dejected sigh, Kagome nodded. “Can I at least have a real answer Mephisto? What's so important you could only trust me-" she made a quick gesture to herself and Sesshomaru "-us?”

Kagome shivered at the look in his eyes; it was dark and foreboding, inspiring deep feeling of dread within her stomach. She swallowed thickly at the coy but equally mischievous smirk twisting his face. For as much as she disliked the demon, this was the first time he had even inspired fear in her. “The son of Satan will need a friend and teacher,”

Her eyes grew to the size of saucers, her shoulders trembling. There wasn't a real satan, not in the biblical sense, right?

“You'll test as a doctor, and a Knight for the Exam,” Wide blue eyes narrowed, pulling herself from her shocked state. A fanged smirk challengingly her with gold eyes beaming mirthfully back at her. “That is if you remember your way around a sword,”

She smirked, eyes alit with matching mirth. Whatever the challenge she would face it head on to protect her family.