#to the people who follow me for blasphemous content: all you can expect from me is shitposts and cute fanarts

[taonpest]

The Miracle is in retrograde which means that I shall shitpost tomorrow

[geladaacomics]

A proposal for a sequel to Hidetaka Miyazaki´s masterpiece; Bloodborne.

People that have yet to earn the "childhood´s beginning" ending of said game might have a hard time following.

Continued from the video: M(other) is the first "other"

Motherhood is one of the core themes the original game revolves around; I wanted to continue to build upon the haunting images that beautiful game hosts. Bloodborne combined fears surrounding the mystery of motherhood, the shady links between females and nightly powers, with the general fear of the unknown, and the other “others” that may lurk within.Aliens are also "others "in the writings of Lovecraft. They are associated with savages and immigrants, with exotic foreign cultures.

Along with their more grandiose, fantastical counterparts, these “aliens” were perceived as a great threat, mainly because of the ideas and viewpoints, the alternative religions they played host to, assaulting the European perspective with their undeniable allure, assaulting Christian values and morality. In a way, Lovecraft was afraid of people different than him because he felt they were valid, and potential agents of mighty, secret, powers. I have to say I much prefer this to the bigotry of low expectations that permeates our culture today.

Dolls are humanity itself. The human body can feel quite "alien" when you look at it under the microscope, or if, instead of a pristine surface of etiquette and makeup, you perceive savage, foreign, beast-like insanity in a fellow homo sapiens, instead of an affirmation of commonly maintained narratives and customs. My version of “the doll” acts as a metaphor for this contrast between simplified, stylized, civilized surface and complex, messy, eldritch innards. Brief Commentary on each panel:

First picture: The Doll stands triumphant above a recently defeated (and consumed) foe; a lycanthropic inhabitant of the nightmare labyrinth. She appears to have used ectoplasmic fangs to suck out the creature´s blood, in order to feed the developing child within her. Jacques Derrida proposed "language" to be the core of our world (replacing old favorites such as "History" "Man" and "God"). Derrida, as I understand, understood language not to be composed of two different pieces (word and meaning) but rather, word referencing word, in time, one. My pictures are all meant to place pressure on the distinction we make between form and content, inviting people to reflect on that tired old antagonism that, in my opinion, has wrecked enough havoc on our world.

Second picture: The squid-like child repairs her mother´s body from within, using a mold to produce a replacement for some lost body part. Many elements are placed in relation to each other, as a sort of equation. Compare and contrast; Moon, mirror, water, blood, vase, container, broken container, the idea of Aquarius(which is featured prominently in the original game), gaze, inner gaze, mold, wave, darkness, depths, phallic tower, time, Christianity, England, movement, sperm, menstruation, womb, broken body/head etc

Third picture: The Doll sings (or perhaps screams) a magic attack spell, producing a Moon-like light source. She has lent one of her eyes to her child, who stared out into the world; a mundane crystal orb now host to an otherworldly gaze. Two being find blasphemous harmony with each other, to the point where it´s hard to say where one ends and the other begins. Saint Peter´s cross is a symbol I find very beautiful because of how ambiguous it is, and how it exposes the contradictions within Christian morality. The desire to humble yourself becomes the desire to outdo as well, two martyrs in competition, a shadow of a shadow of a shadow.

Fourth picture: A wider view of the previous moment, it brings me great joy to integrate the famous ruins so often seen in the works of Caspar David Friedrich´s works. Sound and light; two kinds of waves, bring destruction down upon a group of would-be rapist/predators. The famous idea that 0.999(etc) equals ONE is referenced. In videogames strings of nines necessarily represent the idea of "maximum" I find that to be very beautiful. Here a mix that concept with the "number or the beast" idea. This picture integrates a variety a Christian elements to produce a decidedly un-Christian vision.

[queen-of-confusion13]

Why do I always find trouble?

As always. everything in this post is IMO.

The search for truth sometimes gives you more than expected. Such was my summer of 2022. Fox had quit live Trump rally broadcasts because he was so unpredictable. He's about as stable as a gang of monkeys at the zoo with THE button just tapping away entering numbers until they come up with the launch codes for WW3. So, I keep my eyes on him. Or at least I did.

David Pakman carried live rallies, but I wanted something where the speech could be heard uninterrupted. So I did searches to find a Trump rally being live streamed. That's how I discovered RSBN (Right Side Broadcasting Network) and NEWSMAX. And they had chats like David did. The only chat I was ever in before was in a game, and that is a story in inself, but that's how I connected to the leader of the NEWSMAX. I had known him for a couple years. He loves Jesus, just like I do.

Trump rallies were sponsored by Mike Lindell and he along with a lot of MAGA politicians would be there for hours before the main event was scheduled. RSBN would carry pre-rally coverage and get a lot of people interviewed, but it was the anchors who caught my attention.

RSBN has a chat, and that chat is extremely pro-Trump. I started to share the information that I had about Trump in the chat to try to enlighten others to the truth as I know it to be. The anchors said there was a "troll' in the chat. I figured it had to be me since I was the only voice that had a differing opinion. Lot's of salt shaker emojis came my way, I suppose maybe like killing a slug? Who knows. I'm to old to know about trolls, clones, bots, and all that doo doo. Alas, I have been educated a bit now.

The fact that they were aware of the chat content was quite interesting. Father Frank Pavone was doing some religious programming at RSBN and it was all pro Trump. I found out that he had been defrocked. And yet he continues to use Jesus when he claims to be spreading the gospel and faith and instead spreads lies all the time. I started commenting on Pavone's live stream chats. One time they actually changed the thumbnail for a video because of my comment in the preshow chat. I said that the picture of Trump they were using with a very ferocious pose didn't match the message of peace the words promoted or something like that, and they axed my comment and changed the thumbnail immediately. RSBN finally banned me from their chats. No freedom of speech. The only danger i posed was in exposing the truth.

I am really tired of people lying to good trusting people and taking advantage of them. This is exactly what Hitler did. Some Nazi's were horrid, evil monsters, but many followed him and believed the lies that the Jews caused all the problems and were being rounded up and sent to camp where a job and housing awaited them. They would all be together there. For their benefit.

Really good people think others are good too, so they tend to be more trusting. Whereas really evil people assume everyone else is like them. They don't believe people really are good but instead are wearing a mask like they do. It is the division. And it seems like "they" are trying to divide our country. Saying the word "god" and claiming righteousness works to fool a lot of people. And telling lies about the other side incites feelings of hate. It works very well. How to make a country go to into civil war 101.

I can have all the opinions I want in the blog, and it may only be read by my uncle or by anybody else, but the people i wanted to talk to were the ones who still believed in Trump. Even against all evidence. I figure half are fooled by him, and the other half are somehow have a vested interest. It may be money, but it may be the destruction of the USA. I am trying to reach the good people who were taken advantage of and used and grifted for hundreds of millions of dollars. He lied to you. I am sorry. The reason I was chatting on the channels was to try to figure out how to talk to those I was closest to before the escalator descent into hell. (2015 Trump announcement).

I want my people back. And I want them to know the truth. There is an effort to get the USA into a civil war and it is being led by MAGA. Trump is the leader for the GOP 2024 nomination.

Search out the truth. If not now, then when?

Wake up AMERICA!!

The cause for wanting a civil was comes from many different directions.

Some are angry at the alphabet soup mix of gov't agencies. The FBI and Waco siege was a really a horrible thing and watching the buildings burn on live tv knowing that there were children in them left a mark on my heart in 1993. Then in 1995 Timothy McVeigh paid back the debt with the Oklahoma City bombing. Being pregnant with my first child and seeing the photo of the fireman carrying the dead toddler so gently out of the rubble of the day care shredded any sense of safety i thought day cares could bring.

I can understand people's anger and frustration at government. Just the corruption discovered regarding J6 was appalling. And it continues. We must demand better from our govt agencies. We must know who we are voting for and what the represent, not the smoke and mirror images that a reality star gets to put forth.

The way to change things is at the ballot box. If you cannot stand to listen to politicians speaking, then you need to listen anyway. Figure out which ones you don't like and why. Is their personality, or their stand on the issues. Where did you get your information from, because we have seen that all media leans. ALL OF IT. You just must learn the lean. Get your info from multiple sources. And if somebody has a different view it would be good for both of you to work together to try to discover the truth. Know your elected officials, and if you are at all interested please run. There are some really crazy people out there right now that need to be voted out of office.

[serpentstole]

Luciferian Challenge: Day 25

What is the most valuable lesson you have learned from this path?

Speaking specifically about Luciferianism or similar practices: you can be adversarial, heretical, and defiant against aspects of your previous religion without being a dick about it. 

Blasphemy is absolutely an aspect of my religious practice. I venerate a fallen angel. I incorporate the mother of mankind, who is recognized as a saint in some branches of Christianity, into my Luciferianism. I celebrate the Original Sin (as it’s understood within the context of Christianity), I want to make devotional jewelry and prayer beads out of chains from antique rosaries, and I refuse to surrender my appreciation for a blasting pipe organ or some stained glass. The reversal of my baptism, by nature, also has to be a very heretical rite. Part of the reason I say that my Luciferianism cannot be divorced or even distanced from Christianity is because if it was, none of this would matter. You can’t be a heretic or blasphemous if you don’t on some level acknowledge the laws and rules and expectations of that faith.

But I try not to rub it in anyone’s face, you know? It’s personal to me, not performed openly for the sake of making a statement or purely to offend.

Yes, there might be people who come into my house and take issue with the origins of the beads I used, or the cathedral architecture in my banner. However, they’re just as likely to take issue with the fact that I’m a Luciferian at all. For the rest, I strive not to be confrontational or publicly self indulgent about it. I get no joy from making others uncomfortable, or from shock value, or from offending people. My use of the heretical is my own, my adversarial nature is reserved for those that truly deserve it, and being nasty for the sake of it seems to me like it’ll do more harm than good. 

I’m not going to wring my hands and pretend that here in North America, Christians are oppressed. In both Canada and the United States, Christianity continues to be the dominant religion, and the way it exists within our culture absolutely impacts things like education and lawmaking despite claims to the contrary. I also won’t say that everyone who faces hostility from Christian individuals should meet it with perfect grace and poise, and that losing one’s temper in the face of such abuse is a failure. When someone else is initiating a confrontation, it can be very stressful and we can react how we might not have with a clearer head and a little distance. I know I’ve fallen victim to this in my life.

What I think is that sometimes it’s better to just disengage, to ignore, to block, or to otherwise distance oneself from those who have no interest in learning. They won’t walk away from the exchange feeling thoroughly owned, and you aren’t likely to sway their followers, as those are the fans of their content and message. They’ll walk away thinking Luciferians and Satanists are edgy assholes whose only religious purpose is to try and own Christians with sick burns on the internet. I also think those that seek out Christian bloggers or communities just to insult them or troll them are wasting their time and doing far more harm than good, regardless of what the blog in question is saying. Yes, even if they’re an Evangelical fundamentalist.

This might seem like a strange stance to take as someone who believes so strongly in social progress and empathy, but please remember what some of these communities can be like. That they might have grown up being told anyone unlike them won’t understand the way their church and family does. That people who don’t hold their specific ideals are worse off for it, and that Lucifer, Satan, and the devil is synonymous with evil and that anyone who venerates such beings are monstrous and trying to harm them.

Reinforcing those existing biases and assumptions will not help anyone. Everyone likes to escalate. To champion their cause, and get flustered and worked up over it. Don’t give them the enemy they crave. Do what is right for your beliefs and your practice, but in whatever sacred and personal space or corner of the internet you’ve set aside for it, and leave them to fester alone with their thoughts.

And if their posts only have like three or four notes, you’re only broadcasting those talking points to a wider audience, including those whose days might be ruined by having harmful ideology plastered all over their dash. Let them holler into the void. No one was reading it anyway.

Also, as a side note, way more occultists/people within the witchblr community are Christian than you might think, and you kind of just look like an stupid asshole if you’re taking pot shots at the concept as if you think every Christian is a funeral picketing turbo bigot.

[actualbird]

nobody asked but here i analysed polygon’s “unraveled” and bon appetit test kitchen’s “gourmet makes” and i think they are similar and use three key story elements to their success | a 1.9k word long analysis by an unhinged creative writing fresh grad trying desperately to use their degree to connect two dots

If you asked me who my favorite internet celebrities are, I would not hesitate for a second to answer. Brian David Gilbert from Polygon and Claire Saffitz from Bon Appetit Test Kitchen. They’re awesome! They both host popular YouTube webshows about video games and cooking respectively, two things I am terrible at and don’t do very often. And yet I am enraptured by every episode of their shows. Why? How?

My thesis is this: Polygon’s “Unraveled” and Bon Appetit Test Kitchen’s “Gourmet Makes”, while wildly different shows on many levels, are extremely similar in how they use three key story elements very, very, well.

These three story elements are 1) Plot, 2) Character, and 3) FAWWIEOT (it’s an acronym, I’ll explain it later, I promise)

Let me start with the first and most basic story element these two shows wield amazingly: Plot.

Plot is, in simplest terms, what “happens” in a thing. This is what you’ll find on a movie’s Wikipedia page summary, the details of what went down, the events that took place, the things that occurred. There are many different types of plots because there are many different types of stories, but one of the most basic kinds of plots is very clearly illustrated by something called Freytag’s Pyramid.

Freytag’s Pyramid is a very simple plot that is moved forward by a non-negotiable in many, many stories: conflict. All is well, the line is straight, then a challenge arises and things start to escalate. At the climax, a decision or a group of decisions are made that leads to a de-escalation of the conflict, bringing things down until we are back at a flat line and the conflict has been resolved.

Every single episode of Gourmet Makes can be plotted onto Freytag’s Pyramid

Nearly every single episode of Unraveled can be plotted onto Freytag’s Pyramid too (with the exception of some, like a number of the categorization episodes, the Kojima name generator)

I know what you’re thinking. “So what if Gourmet Makes and Unraveled fit on some funky pyramid? What does that mean?” Well, dear reader, it reveals to us just one of three reasons why these shows are so enjoyable.

Freytag’s Pyramid is basic as shit, and yet it is one of the first plot structures taught to fictionists because people, up to this day, like it. Why? Because Freytag’s Pyramid fulfills two very important desires that we, as humans, love. 1) The desire for there to be a problem and 2) the desire for that problem to be resolved. It scratches our eternal itch to want to watch shit go down but doesn’t leave us up on a cliffhanger, it gives us our catharsis.

Gourmet Makes gives you the entertainment of watching Claire struggle with her task. Then Gourmet Makes shows you Claire slowly and surely rising above the challenge (notable in literally every episode of Gourmet Makes). Unraveled makes you watch BDG work himself up into a frenzy trying to do something stupid, but then Unraveled shows the payoff of...of watching BDG do something stupid, but this time towards some kind of resolution (very notable in the latest Unraveled “How to increase your stamina with terrible video game tactics”).

It is clear to me that Gourmet Makes and Unraveled both use plot in a way that gives viewers satisfaction. But what keeps them coming back for more?

Well that leads us to the second story element: Character.

People love Claire Saffitz and BDG.

Don’t believe me? Look through the tags of literally any gifset of either of them. Here, I did it for you. Here’s some tags for Claire:

And here’s some tags for BDG:

It’s pretty obvious to see that these two are well loved, but why? It’s not just because they’re both good looking, it’s because Claire Saffitz and BDG, with how they are presented in their shows, are good characters.

Claire Saffitz in Gourmet Makes isn’t scripted. She brings her own human frustration, determined hard work, and joyous glee to the show and it makes watching the show all the more enjoyable. BDG in Unraveled, however, is scripted, but he brings to the table his chaotic performance and ‘off the shits’ lecturer energy that brings the viewers in. Regardless of their differences, Gourmet Makes and Unraveled are similar when it comes to character because of one thing: they actually have characters.

What am I talking about? Well, for a period of time on the internet, people in the cooking media sphere and the video game media sphere settled for video content that was divorced from who was presenting the information. Videos like the ones from Tasty where everything was filmed top down and you only saw two hands perfectly putting ingredients into a bowl. Videos like the myriad of video game walkthroughs or video essays that are presented only by a disembodied voice who also seems allergic to actually having fun. This is content that hinges on the fact that people like seeing cooking or video games and that the presenter will mostly just be a background thing.

Bon Appetit Test Kitchen and Polygon both did not want to succumb to this style of presenting information. They both made the decision to bring their presenters into their video content, highlighting their respective presenters’ personalities, quirks, and styles. This is evident in all of Bon Appetit Test Kitchen and Polygon’s video content, not just Gourmet Makes and Unraveled. Do I watch Bon Appetit's show It's Alive because I want to actually make foccacia? No, it's because I love how Brad Leone  mispronounces words and makes me laugh. Did I watch "Fixing Anthem’s boring mech’s with ballsy design" because I actually give a shit about video games? No it's because I love how Pat Gill jokes about fake testicles and also I think he's hot.

The fact that there are actually characters for us on screen to see, makes Gourmet Makes and Unraveled good shit. We’ve got a plot with clear conflict, but that means nothing if there are no personas for us to root for. Gourmet Makes and Unraveled gives us these personas. They give us Claire Saffitz whom we want so desperately to see smile and succeed. They give us Brian David Gilbert whom we want so desperately to see go a little bit crazy. They give us people to connect to, and that often bridges the gap to viewers who honestly don’t give a shit about cooking or video games. Viewers like me who just keep coming back to Gourmet Makes and Unraveled because of the fact that these are characters I care about, these are characters who I want to see smile after finally nailing the recipe or slowly take off their suit as they tell me shit about Zelda I don’t understand.

Gourmet Makes and Unraveled utilize plot in a way that makes these webshows satisfying, and they use character in a way that makes these webshows accessible and keeps people invested.

But they go further.

This brings us to our last story element, not exactly a common or rudimentary one, but an important one nonetheless: Fucking Around With What Is Expected Of Them.

(I know there’s probably a legitimate literary term for this, but sue me, quarantine has kept me stuck in my house since March, so I may have forgotten the exact words I learned in class. FAWWIEOT will have to suffice.)

The gist of FAWWIEOT is that stories have been around for fuckin ever, and because of that, there are clear patterns and tropes that stories follow. FAWWIEOT is the recognition of those patterns and tropes, using them, but finding a different outcome or flair to make themselves special, to make themselves stick out. Kinda like when you’ve got a fic on AO3 tagged with ‘friends to lovers’ but also tagged with like, I dunno, something completely random like ‘character is also a dragon’. Use the tropes, but do something different. Give the audience something they already know, then throw in something new to make them remember your content specifically.

Gourmet Makes and Unraveled FAWWIEOT (I’m using the acronym like a verb now, this is my post, I’m allowed to) very purposefully using an important technique: Flaws.

The standard trope of a cooking show is the chef easily talking to the camera as they perfectly put the ingredients together. All the food comes out perfect on the first try and everything is heavenly and wonderful. Classic cooking shows like Barefoot Contessa (hosted by Ina Garten) and Everyday Italian (hosted by Giada de Laurentiis) followed this pattern, and it made for good television.

But who fucking watches television these days? Everything is online now, and the internet is vicious. If you aren’t interesting, the internet will throw you out to the gutter. So how did Gourmet Makes set themselves apart?

By showing you that things aren’t perfect after all. Gourmet Makes shows you every trial that Claire tries, they show you her successes, but also her failures. They show you when she gets tired and hopeless, they show you when she bounces back and tries again. Gourmet Makes made a cooking show that was flawed, and people loved it.

And what about Unraveled? The design of Unraveled, from BDG’s suit and mug to his presenting style, key us in to the fact that we are watching some sort of lecture. Some kind of educational performance. Personally, this makes me think that Unraveled is FAWWIEOT-ing academia and basically any other media where an “expert” talks at you.

The standard pattern of experts talking to you are basically like TedTalks. You have somebody very well versed in the topic trying to explain to you something, showing you their hypothesis, their process, and their findings.

Unraveled FAWWIEOTs expertise by making BDG research the most crazy shit like OSHA regulations or the Geneva Convention, make the wildest hypotheses like ‘Monster Energy in the morning will be a good idea’ or ‘Sonic is blasphemous’, and then, ultimately, completely unravel himself. The expert in Unraveled isn’t an all knowing being who is always right, he is flawed (and loses his marbles, more often than not.) And we love it.

FAWWIEOT-ing is key because of how it gives us a pattern we know, and then does something new. Novelty is important on the internet, and Gourmet Makes and Unraveled have made a name for themselves on the unique way they Fucked Around With What Was Expected Of Them.

Gourmet Makes and Unraveled are two of my favorite webshows on the internet as of now, and there are many reasons why, many reasons I didn’t include in this post. What I wanted to do here is to highlight how these shows use story elements to be good content because at the core of these videos, even if they aren’t literary fiction, they are good stories. Good stories with a plot that satisfies us, with characters we can see and love, with new twists that keep us on the edge of our seats.

Good stories make for good content, and Bon Appetit Test Kitchen and Polygon have me as a subscriber for as long as they continue on this road.

Thanks for reading!

(Read my other Polygon-adjacent analysis essays at actualbird.tumblr.com/tagged/nobody-asked-but

If you have any suggestions or ideas for more Polygon-adjacent analysis essays I can write, send me an ask!)

[ahs-source]

Happy Friday! Welcome to this week’s Fanfiction Friday! Thank you to those who submitted these fantastic works for this week’s Fanfiction Friday. Let’s celebrate these wonderful works that you can all read while in quarantine! Please stay safe!

As Above, So Below (Completed) by 7_wonders (AO3) Relationships: Michael Langdon x Female Reader | Tags: Hades & Persephone au | Completed (23/23 Chapters) | 71441 words

Your average, mundane life as a college student is flipped upside down when the man you thought you knew as your next-door neighbor turns out to be the God of the Dead. When Michael lures you down to Hell, everything that you thought you knew about the world is proven wrong.

Headache (Completed) by heramew (AO3) Relationships: Fiona Goode x Myrtle Snow | Tags: Abuse, Hurt/Comfort, young Fiona and Myrtle | Completed (1/1 Chapters) | 2098 words

1971, Fiona and her friends sneaked up to a party in town, but things didn't go as planned.

Headfirst for Halos (WIP) by @hellish-ramblings-of-an-emo​ (Tumblr) Relationships: Tate Langdon x Female Reader | Warnings: allusions to both physical and emotional abuse from a family member, actual physical abuse between a freshman and a senior, allusions to mental illnesses such as depression, student v. student violence. A certain way an event was phrased could be considered an allusion to molestation. strong language. a reference to homophobic slurs (none were used) | Completed (1/? Chapters) | 1240 words

I truly believe there isn’t a sound as horrible as the sound of my alarm. The repetitive chimes shoot straight to the center of my brain. It’s horrible. My bones crack as I attempt to get out of bed, a groan instinctively leaving my throat. I was dizzy, the light peeking through from between my blinds making my head throb. My shitty alarm clock read 6:27AM. 15 minutes until my ride gets here.

Love Like Winter (Completed) by @dailylangdon​​ (Tumblr) Relationships: Winter Anderson x Female Reader | Warnings: Oral sex, alcohol use, fingering, lack of plot | Completed (1/1 Chapters) | 549 words

How did you end up like this?

You hadn’t seen her in god knows how long. She was just a girl you knew from school. It was Christmas break from college and by chance you ran into her on your first night back in town.

She took you to her place and you split a frozen cherry lime wine cooler. The two of you talked about old times and dissolved into giggles. Next thing you knew, every piece of your clothing was hastily peeled off your body.

Resistance is Futile (Completed) by Sojourne (AO3) Relationships: Michael Langdon x Female Reader | Tags: Dubious Consent, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Demons, Bondage, Begging, Size Difference, Size Kink, Dirty Talk, Oral Sex, Vaginal Fingering, Fingerfucking, Hand & Finger Kink, Overstimulation, Choking, Hair-pulling, Demons, Demon Summoning, Spanking, Rough Sex | Completed (1/1 Chapters) | 5355 words

Soon after moving into your new apartment, you realize that something isn't quite right. It's constantly cold, you always feel like someone is watching you, and things start moving around on their own.

Turns out, one of the past tenants summoned a demon and then trapped him here, and now he's upset with you invading his territory. Uh-oh.

Demon AU

Run Rabbit Run (Completed) by @maso-xchrist​​​​ (Tumblr) Relationships: Michael Langdon x Female Reader | Warnings: PURE SMUT. Non/dub-con, chasing, violence, mimicry, knifeplay, cutting, stabbing, choking, hanging, & blood consumption. In other words, not for the faint of heart! | Completed (1/1 Chapters) | 6k+ words

A single heart beats in the outpost.

Security Blanket (Completed) by @mxnstersarehuman​​​​​​ (Tumblr) Relationships: Kai Anderson x Female Reader | Prompt: Hey could you write something maybe for a softer Kai Anderson x reader idc what I’m sorry I know this isn’t really specific just softer Kai thanks if you can! | Completed (1/1 Chapters)

You hear the slam of the door and immediately know Kai is home. Things had been so hectic as of late and he was always so busy with his cult so you always made sure to stay up for his return home just so you could see him. Even if it was only for a few minutes before fatigue took over and you both fell asleep.

Kai was a terrifying person, mean and vindictive and manipulative and cruel, all things that he had never been towards you. Everyone in the cult had thought you were crazy for accepting his proposal of a date when he had offered a year ago, but you saw something in his eyes when he asked you. His request wasn’t demanding like you would’ve expected, rather polite and genuinely inquisitive as to whether you actually liked him romantically.

So of course you had said yes.

thanatos (Completed) by SophieGraceJ (AO3) Relationships: Michael Langdon x Mallory | Tags: Immobilisation kink, Smut, Rape/Non-con Elements, Creepy, Blood and Gore, fairytale!au, Snow White!Au, dark!millory, this is dark, Death, cosmic horror kinda | Completed (1/1 Chapters) | 2537 words

“There’s something in these forests.” “Something … something venomous. It’s been killing me since I arrived here. It is what drains me of life, what keeps me bed ridden.” “But I cannot leave. I protect the people. Now I pass this onto you, this destiny is yours now Mallory.”

She fell, fell deep into the grave, body unmoving. At first, she suspected it was sleep. But it wasn’t. No.

Her eyes blinking again, vision clear. She could see, hear, smell … but not touch. Couldn’t move a finger, couldn’t wriggle her toes, couldn’t open her mouth to gasp when time passed.

He met her gaze, and his eyes widened. Only just discovering an intimacy. He smiled some more. This time, it reached his eyes, although they wept with tears, copying her own.

The Devil Incarnate (Completed) by jeromevaleska​​​​​ (AO3) Relationships: Michael Langdon x Female Reader | Tags: POV Second Person, Eventual Smut, Banter, Slow Burn, Family Drama, Lots of plot, Reader-Insert, Explicit Language, Slow Build, Sexual Tension, it starts off when miriam brings michael into her home, there will be smut ya'll already know, Reader-Interactive, Eventual Sex, there's some tension between you and michael, you don't trust him at all, Porn With Plot, i'll add tags as the story goes on, Love/Hate, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Dysfunctional Relationships, Explicit Sexual Content, Developing Relationship | Completed (23/23 Chapters) | 142022 words

You're Miriam Mead's daughter, and you two have a complicated relationship to say the least. You think she's more than a little bonkers with her religious beliefs, and no matter how much she has tried to make you follow the same dark path, it's in vain. But when Miriam welcomes Michael into your home, you start to question everything and you just might become a believer.

the love that discovered the sin (Completed) by @lvngdvns​​​​​ (Tumblr) Relationships: Michael Langdon x Female Reader x Timothy Howard | Warnings: Fingering, oral sex (fem. receiving), threesome, rough sex, double penetration, anallingus, anal sex, vaginal sex, degradation, choking, cum eating, religion kink, biblical allusions/perversion of scripture, all things blasphemous and unholy. Literally just sacrilegious PWP. (+ crack ship pairing) | Completed (1/1 Chapters) | 4.4k words

“Bless me father,” she breathes into Timothy’s ear as she crawls astride his lap, slipping a finger underneath the rim of his collar and pulling it free in a single, effortless motion, “for I have sinned.”

Untitled pt. 2 (pt.1 here) by @writerforprompt​​ (Tumblr) Relationships: Kai Anderson x Female Reader | Warnings: Oral Sex, Manipulation, Mention of Drug Use, Vaginal Sex, Dark Themes, Pregnancy | Completed (1/1 Chapters) | 2350 words 

You were kneeling in between Kai’s legs, head tilted towards the sky, arching your throat into his grip. You brought your chest forward to make sure it was directly within his line of sight. Based upon the number of hungry glances he shot down your plunging neckline, you’d say it was.

Thank you to those who sent in these works! Please continue sending submissions to ahs-source.tumblr.com/submit or through the Tumblr mobile app to continue celebrating the writers in the community!

Previous FF Fridays: 1 | 2a + 2b | 3 | 4a + 4b | 5 | 6

[bronanlynch]

(bi)weekly media update

apparently I just. do these every two weeks now huh. sorry to the tuesday again no problem extended universe crew for being unable to keep to a consistent schedule

listening: Curses by The Crane Wives, a band that I just started listening to but I like their sound, nice and fun and folksy, lots of songs with ominous lyrics that are good on fanmixes

honorary mention to the new Lil Nas X song because we are all love the new Lil Nas X song, it’s a bop, it’s been stuck in my head on and off ever since I heard it, and I am not immune to sexily blasphemous music videos

reading: finished Smoke & Ashes, the most recent book in the Kate Kane series that I talked about last week, and I enjoyed it a lot but there sure is a cliffhanger and afaik no set release date for the next one. it’s pretty angsty but does have lots of nice moments of hope, and some discussion about recovering from both depression and alcoholism that I appreciated.

also read more romance novels, and I appreciate that Cat Sebastian, like KJ Charles, knows how to write about rich characters while making it incredibly clear that hoarding wealth is morally indefensible. it’s like the “wow, cool robot” thing where I want to be told that I’m right for disliking capitalism/imperialism/the military industrial complex, but also I do very much want you to show me the cool robot (hot rich prettyboy in nice clothes)

also finally started Harrow the Ninth today, so I’m sure I’ll have more to say about that next time

watching: speaking of “wow, cool robot,” watched a little bit more Turn A Gundam, which sure does have some cool robots. also some gender. the main character crossdresses to like, hide their identity for fun complicated spy reasons and it’s not treated as a joke or anything? it’s just a thing that they do? and no one comments on it beyond when they were like “hey you have to wear a dress to this event because the people from the moon think our mech pilot is a woman and they can’t know it’s actually you because they still think you’re working for them”

absolutely hate that the guy on the right is just wearing a normal boring suit though like. c’mon man

Zan and I have been watching The Falcon and the Winter Soldier aka the sambucky show each week and my review so far is. well it’s about what I expected. the first episode was incredibly slow and kinda disappointing (Sam and Bucky never interact! the fact that Bucky might maybe miss Steve is never brought up, not even by his therapist, who tbh gives me incredibly bad vibes! if my best friend and the only person I knew from my past fucked off and left me alone to deal with my trauma in favor of ruining the life of a woman who’d moved on from him, I’d be pissed!) (for the sake of not being angry all the time I pretend Steve died instead of did That).

the second episode was more fun, more happens, there’s some incredibly heavy-handed corporate queerbaiting mixed in with some actually nice emotional moments (this article and this thread by the same person have a pretty good summary of All That). the handling of race, uh, could be better tbh. I appreciate what they’re going for, and to be fair the whole show isn’t out yet so it could get better (since some of the problems are tied to, y’know, the overall political problems, i.e. the fact that the villains are a group of people, led by a Black woman, who hate borders and illegally deliver medication to refugees which is somehow a bad thing, I kind of doubt it). but there is something about the way they’re making a Black man the mouthpiece of American imperialism, and the way that the new (white) Captain America who takes the shield when Sam doesn’t want it has a Black girlfriend and a Black best friend who, so far, have mostly just given him motivational pep talks, that doesn’t really inspire confidence. (this article and thread are a good overview of that aspect of the show)

also, I think it’s very funny when people are like “well you can’t say anything about the show yet, only two episodes are out” like. first of all lads it’s a six episode show, a third of the content is a decent chunk to use to form an analytical opinion, and second of all, if something strikes you as Not Great, you’re allowed to feel that way and say that, you don’t have to wait to see if there might be some twist or context that makes the thing you didn’t care for great and fine, actually,

that being said,

(when we watched the first episode, the immediate next thing we did was watch Winter Soldier and I was pleasantly surprised how well it holds up. not perfect obvi but still a solid movie, and the music does fuck)

also watched this very neat little video essay on Victoriana costuming and like, why so much media is set in the Victorian era, and started the c-drama Word of Honor which I’m sure will either be in a future post or just. something I start blogging about normally

playing: the weekend before last was the Beam Saber season finale, which I’ve already posted about quite a bit because it was fun and I love to play games with my friends. played a very fun game of Things, Eldritch and Terrifying by S. Gates this past weekend. it’s a very fun game, with very easy-to-follow rules and lots of helpful adjectives and scene starters, and also just conceptual it slaps (one person is an eldritch terror, the other person is the human that they’re courting. there’s a variant where you play as a vampire. it slaps). we made it uh, more of a rom-com than a horror story but I had a very good time, we told a very cute love story, and we’re gonna try again to make it more horror-y next time.

also I finally started Brigmore Witches and it’s very good and fun. my one complaint is that I want the Whalers to have names, because I enjoy the bit at the beginning where you can eavesdrop on them and some of them are concerned for you and some of them are fucked up about the Overseers invading their home and some of them want to fucking betray you. also, I didn’t realize that the very beginning when you fight Corvo is a dream sequence so I spent the whole fight being like “wait why does he get a gun and I don’t, where are my powers, wait aren’t I supposed to lose this fight for Plot Reasons why is he dead.” also, fucking love the favor that lets you dress up as an Overseer to get into the prison. I do love a good disguise mission

making: citrus chicken (from a cookbook so no link), plus some citrus-y root vegetables. very good if you like orange.

writing: nothing I can share yet for ~zine reasons. yes I have several fandom event weeks coming up that I want to participate in, no I haven’t written anything for any of them yet

[karajaynetoday]

at the going down of the sun and in the morning, we will remember them | ashton irwin

Hello lovely people! Because I’m apparently far too emo and angsty to function when it comes to my writing, I’ve decided to explore Part 2 of the first ever 5sos writing piece I posted on tumblr “it’s not the pain they’re getting over, it’s the love”. 

I’ve based part of this part 2 concept on the ode, which is a poem that’s recited at ANZAC and remembrance day celebrations here in Australia (is it blasphemous to use that as writing inspo? Soz if it offends you, I just love the ode so much). The poem is 4 lines that I’ve split into two parts and incorporated into the piece.

More writing here | send feedback/thoughts/suggestions here

Read part one here, part three here

Trigger warning for death of a loved one following an illness (non-graphic). 

(This is a fem reader insert)

Word count: 1.6k 

You thought you’d have more time. Even though you knew the clock was ticking on your mother’s mortality, you just thought you’d have more time. But then again, no amount of time would ever truly be enough. Ashton had stayed around for the weekend, and you’d found each other’s arms again as you sat in the backyard and watched the sun set, but it turns out he had press and meetings in the city on Monday (the only way he could wrangle the sudden trip home was to coordinate at least some work things) so you tried to embrace it, despite knowing his company would be short-lived.

Your mother had loved her birthday party and seeing the faces of those she cherished the most, but it had also exhausted her, and come Monday morning you couldn’t convince her to move from her bedroom into the lounge where she usually spent her days, but you just figured she was more tired than usual. You managed to get your siblings out the door and out of your hair so you could tidy up after yesterday’s festivities, but deep down you could feel yourself becoming more and more unsettled about what was yet to come. It’s there, in the pit of your stomach. Every time you swallow, you feel it. But because you’ve got no choice other than to go on, that’s what you do. Push forward with your life, and push the feeling away.

Around lunchtime, your phone chimed with a text message from Ashton that simply read “Neverland?”, which had you grinning like an idiot. Neverland was what you called one of your teenage hideaways, a codename to stop your parents from figuring out where it was, and in your mind it was still a magical place where your hopes and dreams lived, and where your love for Ash and his kindred spirit grew and grew. In reality, it was a gathering of really old trees along a dried up creek bed behind your house, with a ripped and torn old couch you’d managed to push in from your backyard, but there was a part of your soul there, and you knew part of Ashton’s was there too, amongst the whispering leaves and the bark scratched deep with words.

You tried not to think too much about it, tried not to get too attached to the idea of spending more time with Ash, because you knew eventually he’d leave again and that distance would rip your heart into pieces once more. But you wanted to hope for more. A message here or there, or a phone call to hear his voice, or maybe one day a trip to see the world he told you about with bright, shining eyes all those years ago. Maybe with his hand holding yours, and those hazel eyes meeting yours, and just… more.

You were stuck in your daydream at the kitchen sink, idly scrubbing a cake dish from the party, when a loud beeping snapped you out of it. What was that? You’d never heard it before. Where was it coming from? You rushed out of the kitchen into the hallway, and then as you neared your mother’s bedroom the beeping got louder and louder until it was the only thing you could hear, and the only thing you could feel was the bile pushing up your throat. Opening the door, all it took was one glance and you knew. She was gone.

They shall grow not old, as we that are left grow old:

Age shall not weary them, nor the years condemn.

You don’t know how, but you’d managed to dial the numbers of the people you needed to call. First, the doctors, who needed to come and make it official with their paperwork and time of death. Second, your siblings, so they could come home to you. Third, your mother’s best friend, who answered the phone on the first ring and came straight over to hold you in her arms while you bawled like a baby. Fourth, you thought about calling your mother’s best friend’s eldest son, but you couldn’t bring yourself to press the button. You’d only had him back for a day and a half. What a cruel universe it was, to put this scenario upon you. Instead, you sent a text. “She’s gone. Neverland at 6pm x”.

The next few hours passed in a blur of tears and paperwork and soothing cups of tea. Because it wasn’t an entirely unexpected event, soon enough family friends were showing up on your doorstep, offering warm casserole dishes with hushed tones and sad eyes, and you willed yourself into strong big sister mode, thanking them for their kindness and trying your best to soothe their grief. Your siblings sat quietly in different parts of the house, not quite knowing what to do with themselves. No one wanted to eat anything quite yet, and honestly you still had that sick feeling in your stomach. With a splash of cold water to your face and a few deep breaths, you pulled on a warm jacket before stepping out the back door into the cool evening air, and slipping through the gate unnoticed.

You hadn’t been to Neverland in almost ten years, but somehow your feet knew exactly which path you needed to take. Shuffling towards the familiar trees, you could just make out Ashton’s figure in the twilight, his head in hands as he sat forward on the dusty old couch that had somehow survived years of turbulent weather outdoors. He looked up when he heard your footsteps, and you could see the puffiness in his eyes. Fuck, would everyone look at you with such sadness for the rest of your life?

You felt the tears prick in your own eyes as you neared closer, and Ash stood and opened his arms to you. You throw yourself at him and like just a few days ago, you feel the warmth and the safety and the security and you feel the part of your soul that is set on fire whenever his skin touches yours, but before you can get any words out, the sobs come hard and fast. You’re babbling incoherently, and he’s whispering sweet reassurances into your ear, and pulling you down onto the couch so he can pull you into his side and rub small circles into your back. He’s using your nickname as he tries to calm you, and slowly you feel your tears start to slow and your breathing regulate. Sniffling, you settle your head onto Ash’s chest and close your eyes.

“What is it with this place and me crying my eyes out? Last time we were here, you told me you were going to London.”  You said quietly, wiping your eyes.

“That’s right… and you told me you hated me and that you never wanted to see me again.” Ash whispers, brushing your hair out of your face with a gentle hand.

You snorted, rolling your eyes. “Yeah, and that lasted all of 7 hours until I sat next to you on the bus the next morning and copied your homework.”

Ash laughed, and the sound brought warmth to your heart. Sounds cheesy, but you wanted to bottle it and hear it every day for the rest of forever. You were both silent for a moment, taking in the peacefulness of the night sky, and the hushed whispering of the trees that surrounded your little hideaway spot. You close your eyes, and breathe in. Breathe in the moment, breathe in Ashton, breathe in and breathe out all of the stress and anxiety and anguish and fear that was trying to push its way to the front of your heart and soul.

“We’ll remember her. I promise. We won’t ever forget.” Ashton says quietly, ducking his head down to meet your eyes. You smile sadly, reaching up to cup his cheek and brush your fingers over the dark circles under his eyes.

“I know. It’s okay. It’s just a lot, even though I knew it was coming.”

“Just because you expected it, doesn’t make it easier. Doesn’t mean you can’t be sad and confused and just be yourself for at least a little while. My love, you’ve had the weight of the world on your shoulders, but I need you to remember that you matter. So much. To your family and to me and I know that I’ve been gone and shit at keeping in contact and I’m so fucking sorry that I – “ You lean in and silence Ashton’s words with a soft kiss. He’s shocked at first, and then relaxes into, before pulling away and resting his forehead on yours.

“Are you trying to seduce me? Out here, on this couch?” He asks, wiggling his eyebrows.

“You wish, Irwin. Just wanted to shut you up. I know my mother just died, but we don’t have to have emo hour every hour.” You chide in response, tapping his nose and earning a laugh.

You push yourself up off the couch and step over to the big tree beside it, reaching out to run your hands over the words carved into the trunk. Your siblings’ names, and Ash’s, his initials and yours in an arrow heart, and the word “remember” in the centre of it all.

You feel Ash step up behind you, and his head rests on your shoulder and kisses your neck softly. It’s another moment, like you had in the kitchen, where your heart breaks and bursts with love and a feeling of content at the same time, but for now, it’s enough. Enough to commit to memory, and enough to get you through until the sun rises for another day.

At the going down of the sun and in the morning

We will remember them.

More writing here | send feedback/thoughts/suggestions here

Read part one here, part three here

[amratsu]

alright these girls have haunted me for about a whole month now time to break it all down for anyone vaguely interested in them

hololive/vtuber 101 below the read more

THE FUCK IS HOLOLIVE?: An idol agency except all of its roughly 20 or so girls are youtube streamers who have their identity protected by a live2d avatar. They recently had a very fun live concert and all of them have or will have 3d models, but the majority of content is just them streaming whatever's their fancy at the time. (As of 2/17/2020 a lot of them play a lot of ARK, thank Coco for that) Therefore, they're part of the new form of niche culture called Vtuber.

THE FUCK IS A VTUBER?: Virtual youtubers. Like a normal streamer but, again, live2d portrait instead of their actual face. That's basically it. Content is about as varied as any other youtuber.

ALRIGHT, WHO WE GOT?: Hololive's split into OG Tokino Sora, the girls alongside her who are also primarily 3d, and then 'generations'. Just plug in their names and you'll find their channel easy. Again, variety differs between all the girls, but expect a lot of Nintendo games, chat streams, karaoke, and Minecraft across the board.

-Tokino Sora OG mom slash idol, debuted all the way back in 2017. Probably the only proper idol in all of Hololive. Warm, friendly, relaxing. She mostly does 3d variety streams and song debuts so she's hard to follow without advanced japanese.

-Roboco(-san) Pose happy killer robo with a notably smokey voice and calming demeanor. Plays a large amount of minecraft and first-person games in general; recent streams include ARK, Pokemon Mystery Dungeon remaster, Apex, and Fortnite.

-Sakura Miko ELIIIITE MLG miko idol with a tendency to swear a bit. High energy, fully embraced 'press f', gives herself sunglasses during streams, great friends with Pekora. Also notably into eroge. Did a full playthrough of Papers Please lately and is one of the most addicted to ARK (21 streams at around 4-5 hours each.)

1st Generation -Yozora Mel Sleepy vampire with the occasional killer instinct. Soothing, gentle, kind of lewd. Very much into nintendo games with Smash, Ring Fit, SwoSh, and Mario Kart being her latest content, but she's a little slower with the output. Part of the lewd blonde club with Aki, Haato, and Choco, who were demonetized until recently.

-Aki Rosenthal Cyber elf with detachable twin tails. Pretty similar to Mel in disposition, though less sleepy and more...I want to say 'fantastical'. Recently gained popularity due to her buck naked superhuman beefcake character in ARK, with Kerbal, Go Home, and some ASMR rounding out the rest of her content.

-Natsuiro Matsuri Eternal 17 year old cheerleader from the class next door, Matsuri is a high energy raging lesbian who's also a complete sweetie. Her infamous bandaid clip is what got a lot of western fans into Hololive. Plays a wide variety of games but also twitcasts at random times of the day like when she's in bed or in the bath, just to chat with her viewers about what's on her mind. Well loved.

-Akai Haato The ESL transfer student, girl next door, Haato is, well, exactly that. Commonly traveling for studies, Haato is a bubbly girl with a fine sense for aesthetics; you'll catch her making elaborate builds in Minecraft or playing visual novels during streams, along with a smattering of other games. Notable in that she's the only girl that'll do purely English streams, likely to help with her own education. Also kind of a baka.

2nd Generation -Minato Aqua Disaster masochist maid who's actually stupidly good at video games sometimes. She's both mischievous and hard working, massively popular in China, and, again, stupidly good at games. Soulsborne speedruns, PUBG, ARK (also one of the most addicted), Minecraft (seeing a pattern?), League if you catch her bilibili streams...but she's also the one who will spend a stream calling the other girls and asking them to bully her. Wild card gremlin.

-Murasaki Shion Genius mage who doesn't do a lot with her magic. Pretty well known for her 'neeeeeee', with a distinctly smug avatar/voice. Pretty good at games too, with a variety of Pokemon, retro games, Minecraft, Smash, horror, Mario Kart, etc. Excellent singing voice too, would recommend her covers.

-Yuzuki Choco The totally-not-a-succubus demon nurse at your highschool, Choco embodies :sweating:. Obviously she's lewd, but there's also a silly and petulant side to her that's fun to watch too. ASMR is her specialty. She's also, surprisingly, really into Dead By Daylight, so if that combination sounds fun to you hit her up.

-Oozora Subaru If Haato is the girl next door, Subaru's the bro next door. A very down to earth but energetic and sporty tomgirl, she recently spent three streams and sixteen hours on trying to take down Sans. Other recent things include Live A Live, The Witch's House, and GTA. Refreshingly easy to relate to compared to the other girls sometimes.

-Nakiri Ayame Hello, honored humans~ Hololive's millenium old oni. Has a peculiar way of speaking, especially in her pronouns, which lends a certain charm if you can got on board with it; happy go lucky, easy to like, and really cute on top of all that. Recently recovered from sickness (as of 2/26) so was the last to get on the Ark craze, she's actually very fond of multiplayer games as a way of 'getting to know mortals'. Apex Legends, Mario Kart, Splatoon, etc.

GAMERS: A sort of generation on its own, and also a kind of weird designation when all the girls game so frequently. Oh well!

-Shirakami Fubuki Fox. Not a cat. Super cheerful, makes a lot of weird noises that people turn into youtube poops (that she encourages), and also a helluva gamer. Plays plenty of battle royales, ARK, and of course Nintendo/Minecraft stuff. Infamous for her absolute feral hunter instincts in Project Winter, where she commonly massacres the entire map on her lonesome when she's the traitor.

-Ookami Mio Mom wolf who has to play tsukkomi (straightman) to basically all of Hololive sometimes. Which makes it all the more hilarious during her semi-common charisma breaks, like during Haato's recent English Exam stream. Has been into EDF, Pokemon, Ghost Trick, and Splatoon lately.

-Nekomata Okayu The sleepy smug cat with the most chill personality. Notably very, VERY close with Korone, and in general kind of a playboy in general. Never denies it or any of her myriad transgressions though. Her Mother 2 run has been fun recently, but really you could just tune into her frequent chat streams and relax that way.

-Inugami Korone Dog. An oddball who kind of just goes at her own pace, playing all sorts of weird games like Nyanpo (the pokemon prototype) and weird PS1 retro games. Shows a disturbingly violent side sometimes; her ongoing Blasphemous run and recent RE4 runs have shown how much she's into that kind of stuff. But also she's still a dog, so really don't worry.

Inonaka Music: -AZKi AZKi is closely associated with Hololive but is really more of her own thing, being even more idol than Sora is. Doesn't stream much if at all, has her own album out, does music collabs more than anything else, etc. Helluva singer though.

-Hoshimachi Suisei The vtuber idol who's totally not a psychopath, and totally a goddess at tetris. Like Fubuki, made a name for herself with her psychotic rampages in Project Winter, and also very much unfazed by horror games. Really fucking good at tetris too, doing 98v1 streams lately in Tetris 99, and a godly songstress too. Her karaoke streams are to die for.

3rd Generation: Also known as Hololive Fantasy. These girls are particularly close to each other. If you can find translated clips, I definitely recommend their host club streams where they compete in seducing other Vtubers. (Yes. That's serious)

-Usada Pekora AH^HA^HA^. You'd think she was a cute rabbit, but no! It's a Tewi level shitposter combined with some legit video game skills. She likes playing the heel deliberately just for shits and giggles, like when she nearly walked off with Miko's Nether Star. She's in fact very close to Miko, their relationship being both great friends and great rivals. Definitely one of the most addicted to ARK too; she's been making headway in conquering the ocean.

-Shiranui Flare Handsome half-elf archer, Flare's the designated tsukkomi of the third generation. She's definitely the most down to earth of them, charismatic to boot, and does as she pleases with a relaxed personality and husky, smokey voice. Very very VERY close to Noel. You'll find some really fun playthroughs of various action games like Dark Souls, Bayonetta, and Sekiro on her channel, and thanks to her picking up game mechanics fast they're fun to watch for anyone.

-Shirogane Noel Knight Captain of the Shirogane Knights, Noel's...kind of an airhead, actually. But she's definitely a pleasant, softspoken sort of person who's incredibly relaxing to listen to. Also a big eater, you'll hear her talk about beef bowls and muscles a lot. Just try not to stare too much at her 'pectorals.' As mentioned, VERY close to Flare (they just had a two day long date to a ryokan). Plays whatever with no focus in particular.

-Uruha Rushia The cute, soft, innocent apprentice necromancer, Rushia occasionally comes out of the gates roaring with rage filled screams before chilling out. An absolute cutie though, who loves her fans very much (though really every Hololive member does), her attempts to be cool and reliable lend to some great comedy. She's got a great singing voice if you can find one of her bilibili streams, and otherwise plays a wide variety of things.

-Houshou Marine A~hoy~. The completely safe for work, modern, not-cosplay eternal 17 pirate...and everything I just said was a lie. Most of it anyways. Marine's a riot of a lady with an incredibly dirty mind and dirtier motor mouth, great voice acting ability, and knack for art that she'll happily show off (among other things). Definitely one of my favorites, you'll find plenty of chat and art content on her channel, along with some of the most Ark addiction and a full array of Touhou game playthroughs.

4th Generation: Hololive's newest five girls, it's been a month and change since they debuted. They're notable for working together on some of the most wild content Hololive's put out so far, all helmed by a certain dragon. But we'll get to that.

-Tokoyami Towa The little devil that does whatever she wants, Towa's known for a couple of other things at this point: refreshingly honest personality, Pokemon playthroughs with an eclectic choice in team comp, and her charmingly atypical tomboy voice (though her mic's not amazing). Great singer, super funny if you can find the rare translated clip of her, and was an absolute menace at the recent Hololive werewolf/mafia game. How she managed to fake being a Seer from day one and nearly win, I'll never know.

-Tsunomaki Watame Hololive's bouncy sheep. Ram? Something like that. A very girly, friendly, lightly ara-ara personality, she's an honest and open with her feelings sort of girl. Earnest laughter at chat and games, real emotional tears while watching the live concert with her generation mates, Watame's a total sweetheart who streams a bit of music everyday as the pre-show to Coco's Morning Shitposts (official name). She's also gotten very close to her senpais in some regards...but above all she likes singing, chilling out in Minecraft, and recently playing through a couple Kirby games.

-Himemori Luna If you want to see a completely innocent cinnamon roll looking character say things like 'ass' and 'don't f*cking take crystal m*th', Luna's your gal. Her high pitched, almost childlike voice takes a bit of getting used to but she's a sweetheart that just has fun no matter what she's doing. But she'll also say a bunch of really funny shit while doing it just from sheer juxtaposition of her voice/appearance and the vocabulary. Surprisingly good at video games too.

-Amane Kanata PP Tenshi. Perfect Pitch, Powerpoint...Kanata's a bit of a sheltered honor student sort of girl who has an incredible vocal range, so much you'd be forgiven for thinking she was a professional voice actor or singer. She loves playing along with jokes even if she doesn't get them some times, and is really close with Coco. If not for said dragon she'd be the biggest memelord in the 4th generation, but alas; her channel has lots of collabs with fellow members and a series of cute 'research' videos on the various generations of Hololive. Unfortunately untranslated though.

-Kiryuu Coco The one, the only, the President of Nishinari herself, Coco has been a force of nature since she debuted. Her vulgar sense of humor, rapid fire jokester nature, fluent English speaking, and complete conversion of Hololive to the wonders of dinosaur taming in Ark has made her one of the most subscribed girls in a matter of weeks. Every day at 6am JST or 1pm PST, she does a quick 20 minute gig called Coco News (officially translated as Coco's Morning Shitpost) where she reports on the various ongoings in Hololive. This ingeniously brings attention to the silly crap everyone's been up to, really fostering a sense of community between the girls you don't see elsewhere, while also being a riot to watch as she roasts everyone for their silliness (with full permission). Other notable memes include her stalwart boycotting of Nintendo Switches, her desire to fund a Hololive house, and her recent Hitman 2 run.

[inorganicone2230]

Purity (Part 1) Yandere!Overhaul x Fem!Reader

Part 2

Summery: Overhaul meets a quirkless foreigner who holds some very interesting views on his way of thinking. The more time he spends with her, the more he wants to keep her and her purity for himself. And he has no problem with falling to the depths of obsession if it means getting what he wants.

Warnings: None for this chapter.

Kai Chisaki certainly considered himself to be, above all else, a visionary, a Messiah meant to save the world from itself. He saw the world for what it truly was. A vile, rotten cesspool, filled to the brim with filth and ugliness, and plagued by a disease called quirks. Despite possessing a powerful one himself, he never considered it to be the blessing that other people did, not that he felt above using it to achieve his goals of course. He was going to be the one to set the world right again, and rule the underworld with an iron fist, so he begrudgingly realized that he would need the power of his quirk to accomplish said goal. No matter how much it sickened him.

Some might call him insane for his beliefs. That quirks were a sickness, infecting the populace with Hero and Villain Syndrome. But he knew the truth that they were all just blind to, that’s why they needed him to be their guide and show them the way to purity.

Perhaps that’s why he found you, you were meant to be his reward for all the good he was doing. It’s only been a few weeks, but he’s sure that it’s a day he won’t ever forget. Not ever, he thinks, gazing down at your form spread out over the sheets in sheer, manic glee as he recalls the all too vivid day…

—————

In hindsight, pulling you out of the way of that moving vehicle could be seen as the starting point to the chain reaction that sent him down this long and winding road of obsession. Not that he would change it for anything in the world.

He had merely acted without much thought when he reached out his white gloved hand to pull you out of the way, touching you as little as possible. He simply wasn’t in the mood to get himself soiled with your blood that would go flying everywhere should you get hit. Touching your shirt seemed like a small price to pay if it meant avoiding being covered in bodily fluids.

You turned around, your (e/c) blown wide in shock and blinking up at him stupidly. Your features were obviously that of foreign descent, not that cared enough to guess what country you came from. It was far too beneath him.

“Umm… thank you. That definitely would have been horribly messy.” You said, your Japanese was relatively decent, if a bit too formal.

He glared, noting with quiet contempt that you didn’t seem affected by it, probably because you were too stupid to know when to be afraid. “The only reason I did it was because I’d rather not get covered in blood and gore. If I could have avoided it, I wouldn’t have bothered.”

You seemed more amused than perturbed by his attitude, and he was beginning to wonder if you were very brave or just hopelessly stupid. “Well thank you for the assistance nonetheless, even more so considering what a hassle it was for you.”

If there were just a few less people out and about he might have decided to use his blasted quirk on you, consequences and mess be damned. Instead he turned on his heel. “Perhaps next time, whatever filthy quirk you have will be able to save you.” He fully intended to walk away and never think about this incident again, however, what you said next was more than intriguing enough to make him stop and give you a second glance.

“That would make sense, if I actually had a quirk. I’ll be sure to ask for one in my next life.”

He turned around to look at you, you were already walking away, but it looked like you were lost, you kept looking at your phone and then back to the street signs and buildings as if you were trying to translate the writing.

“You were born quirkless?” He’d never actually met someone who was genuinely born quirkless, only those that had lost their quirks due to his drug. He could only imagine what it must be like to feel so clean and pure.

You only gave him a brief glance as you continued to scrutinize your surroundings, more than likely surprised that he was still standing there, let alone talking to you. “Yup. No special power for me, unless you count my extraordinary ability to walk a straight line in platform heels while drunk a quirk that is.” You chuckled, the sound not nearly as annoying as he thought it might be.

“Then you’re one of the lucky ones.”

It seems that was the comment that got him your full attention, your head lifting up to stare wide eyed at him. “Lucky? That’s certainly not the word most people would use when describing a quirkless individual. Do you have something against them by chance? You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to, but now you’ve got my curiosity peaked.”

Kai thought about it, why he was still here, why he was still talking to you, and the only answer he could come up with was that he was interested to see what your reaction would be to learning his views. Would you agree? Look at him like he was insane? He wanted to know, so he figured there couldn’t be any harm in enlightening you.

“Have you ever heard the theory that quirks were caused by a strain of virus carried by rats?” You gave a quick shake of your head, (h/c) strands bouncing around your face as he continued. “Quirks are a sickness, they ravage humanity with Hero and Villain syndromes and people seem content to go along with it. It sickens me that the world has fallen so low as to rely on abilities and deformities that we were never meant to have in the first place. It’s unnatural and disgusting.”

He was expecting some kind of reaction from you, he didn’t think you’d jump right into agreeing with him, that would have been too perfect. His best guess was that you were going to think he was crazy, most outside of the Shie Hassaikai thought he was, why should one quirkless girl be any different. The reply you gave him definitely didn’t fit into either of those categories.

“That’s certainly an interesting way of looking at it, from an evolutionary standpoint at least. I’ll admit that when looking back on human history and development, quirks are definitely not what I would have expected human evolution to progress towards. So perhaps your rat theory does have some merit. Almost like a second coming of The Black Death or something.” You said, having moved closer to the wall of a building while the two of you spoke.

“You don’t think I’m crazy for thinking this? Most people would have stopped listening after I used disease and quirk in the same sentence.”

“No.” You chuckled. “There’s nothing wrong with having an opinion that differs from the norm, sometimes it’s what we need to progress and move forward. Culture and society are constantly changing and adapting to new things as time goes on, but we wouldn’t be able to do that if it wasn’t for someone else stepping forward and saying that something needs to be done or fixed if we are to ever move on from the ways of the past. Your views may be a bit extreme, but definitely not crazy. After all, no one ever said passion was a bad thing.”

You couldn’t have possibly known how pleased he was by your words as you looked up into his eyes, eyes that even his underlings flinched at when attempting to hold his gaze for too long, but you just stared right at him, unflinching with a small smile tugging at your lips. It set his pulse racing pleasantly, and if he didn’t already know that he was in top physical health, he might have thought something was wrong with him.

“You looked as if you were lost, perhaps I can help you find your way.” He honestly felt like taking apart his own brain when the words left his mask covered mouth, but it was too late now, you were already agreeing.

“If it’s not too much trouble, that would be amazing! I can speak Japanese fairly well, but reading it is another story entirely.” You said pulling out your phone to show him an address for a local hotel, he took note of how soft and clean your hands looked, not a speck of filth to be seen. “I’m here on a study trip with a group of classmates and I went wandering off to look around, ended up getting lost along the way and was too embarrassed to ask for directions.”

“It’s three blocks away, follow me.” He ordered, turning on his heel. He didn’t bother to see if you were tagging along behind him or not, he knew you would obey.

The walk was kept silent and he was pleased that you didn’t seem to want to fill the time with pointless chatter as most people would have, but a small part of him was a bit disappointed as well, he wouldn’t have minded hearing you speak more of those intellectual views of yours. He wondered what else you might have to say about his views on the world. He might have even asked if the two of you had not just reached your destination.

There was someone rushing over, a blonde girl with blue scales around her yellow eyes was marching over to you. “Where in the Nine Circles of Hell did you run off too?! We’ve been worried sick! Don’t you ever scare me like that again.” She said, pulling you into a tight hug.

He wanted to obliterate the annoyance as soon as she touched you. It was blasphemous that this piece of garbage would even think to touch someone as clean as you with their dirty hands. He was even more annoyed that you didn’t seem bothered by this, just reached up to pat her filthy head.

“Sorry Nell, I went for a walk and got a little turned around. But this guy helped me out!” You turned around, to say thank you one last time and maybe get his name, but he was already gone.

Nell just gave you a look, like you had lost your marbles. “What guy (Y/N)? Don’t tell me your seeing ghosts again like you did in elementary school. Was this one at least hot?” She jeered with a barking laugh, bumping her shoulder against yours and motioning for you to follow her towards the hotel entrance.

“That was one time! And you know it was only because Mike was hiding in the attic of that old house to purposely try and scare us. What ten year old wouldn’t have been terrified.”

“Right… sure that’s all it was.” She teased.

“I swear to God, he was right there not even two seconds ago!” You were amazed he managed to slip away in so short a time span. “But he did seem pretty antisocial so he probably didn’t want to hang around longer than necessary. Still though,” You look back over your shoulder one more time to see if you can spot that green jacket. “kind of cliche to just up and leave like that without a word.”

“You didn’t answer my question though, was your mystery man easy on the eyes?”

You did have to smile a bit at that. “He did seem pretty handsome from what I could see of him. He was wearing a black dust mask over his mouth and nose, so all I could see of him were his gold eyes. It’s a shame I didn’t get to find out his name, he was interesting to talk too.” You sighed. “But oh well, it would be a miracle if I ever ran into him again in a city this big.”

From up on the roof of another building, Kai watched and listened, a plan already forming in his head. He had to agree with you, it was a shame you couldn’t have spoken more. He found himself pleased with the sound of your voice and wondered what his name would sound like rolling off your tongue, the thought had him shuddering in pleasure. He was not one to question himself on anything, if he wanted something or had a goal, he would find a way to accomplish it. And he most definitely wanted to interact with you again.

“I’ll come find you again soon (Y/N), then we will both get what we want.”

This was my first time writing for Overhaul, so please let me know if you thought I did his character justice! Thanks and please enjoy!

And a special thanks to @talpup for helping me brainstorm this and all my other stories!

[claraeuterpebaudry]

A Playlist for a Friend: The Ashley’s 

( @ashlee-inperfection @ashleigh-inyourdreams @ashle-intheknow @ashley-incharge )

Bitch - Meredish Brooks

I'm a bitch, I'm a lover I'm a child, I'm a mother I'm a sinner, I'm a saint I do not feel ashamed

For this playlist, I tried to get a mix of the 90′s/early 2000′s and more modern songs because Recess aired during that time, and then these ladies have been given a contemporary spin on them, which I’ve adored following. So, of course, this iconic song must be added because it’s just listing off all the things a woman is and can be. All of these girls are complex individuals in and outside of their friendships. They all have their differing personalities that have all meshed together between one another to form this strong bond. Each one showcases that a girl can have a complex character and story! 

Countin’ Up - Rico Nasty 

When I walk up in the mall, they be turnin' and lookin' No race, I went easy 'cause the pace I been pushin' In the stew, I'm like a chef, they like, "Rico, what you cookin'?" Probably one of these bitches' heads, I'm better than all the rest

Not only does the content of this song apply to these gals, but the style also falls into a mix of the new and old. It’s just about her talking about how great she is lol. And good on her! Why can’t women sing and create about the things they have and the things they have accomplished? Men do it all the time to compensate. Women can do it just as easily. So that’s why I included it in for their playlist, I don’t think these girls are very shy about showing off their accomplishments, and especially not to one another! Which is great, we love women supporting women and uplifting one another. 

No Scrubs - TLC

Well a scrub checkin' me, but his game is kinda weak And I know that he cannot approach me 'Cause I'm looking like class and he's looking like trash Can't get wit' a deadbeat ass 

I feel like this song speaks for itself lmao. They literally have a tier list of the kids in school and have a standard for the kind of people that they associate themselves with. No Scrubs, thanks! 

Smile - Maisie Peters 

Did I, did I, did I finish? They are my girls, and it's us who's deciding It's our door, did we say you're invited? Leave your name and we'll call if we like it

A song about shedding all the politeness that’s expected from girls and just embodying the power that she creates for herself. I think this is a very Ashley song since, to them, they run the show. No one else has control of the steering wheel besides the four of them. And they don’t really care if they’re nice about it, obviously. They don’t exactly default to Nice and Polite. Which I love, I love that they are mean and they do burn bridges and run the place with a heel on everyone’s throat. 

Lights Out - Danity Kane

Turn off my lights And see if you wanna get into my dark side You ain't never, ever Had a nothing better

Personally, I think this is the one of the most underrated girl groups and it’s such a shame because they have some great songs. Like this one, aah!! It’s a little raunchy, I’m sorry, but I’m going to interpret it for it being about the duality of someone lol. All of these girls are different! Obviously! Ashley is super harsh with a silver tongue, but she’s also sort of soft around Roo and, of course, her girls. I don’t know how she will be to her baby, but I’m excited to see!! Then we have Ashleigh who the lyrics can have a more literal meaning for, talking about having a dark side when the lights go out. Literally haunting people’s dreams as opposed to what she presents to be in regular life. Ashlee is different since she isn’t like the other Ashley’s, she is not necessarily going to bully people just for the fun of it. Ashlé has her different side of having the gossip blog and stirring up drama with it, even if that means having to talk about her friends, too. (And yes, maybe I do imagine her at her computer with the lights out looking at all the mail roll in like an internet troll lol, but she does it with poise and in good taste). 

I Owe You Nothing  - Seniabo Sey

I don't have to walk for you I don't have to talk to you See, I'm not on display Never was, never will ever be for you

Again, a song about how women don’t have to be a certain type of way in order to simply exist. They can just be who they are and that is enough. And I think that, to one another, they are a reminder of that fact. To have surrounded themselves with these girls and to have that support group for one another but to also have three other complex, intelligent, and capable individuals that they can look at to see that women are great! There shouldn’t be any shame in being one just because society has given them those standards. 

You Gotta Be - Des’ree

Time asks no questions, it goes on without you Leaving you behind if you can't stand the pace The world keeps on spinning You can't stop it, if you try to

Another iconic song, and this one is about finding yourself. All these chickies have graduated and are about to get out of the world of Swynlake Secondary and into the bigger one beyond it. They’re growing up! Time is coming for them, I mean Ashley is going to be a mother pretty soon!! I don’t know what the future holds for the four of them, but they’re going to be figuring it out! Hopefully together, because I love reading all of their interactions, but who knows! The world of university and adulthood could give them a different outlook on their lives....or they could just become adult versions of their high school selves without changing at all! 

Promise - MUNA

Mean-hearted girls will kill their loves to hurt themselves They can’t believe that they deserve anything else And even if you said you know that I’m sorry I don’t know if I could ever forgive me 

I know a lot of the songs on this album are more positive and me praising them, but I also thought this song was good to throw in because they have caused pain and humiliation to others through their actions. Which, as characters, I really admire because we love a good antagonist. Love the drama, intrigue, conflict. This song is about causing harm and not being able to stop for one reason or another, which I think can be applied to all of them since they do cause damage to others. 

Do It - Spice Girls

Come on and do it It's time to free what's in your soul You've got to get it right, this time Come on, freak and lose control

Of course we had to include the Spice Girls, I feel like it would be blasphemous to not. It’s just about sticking it to the man and Doing It! I think that’s a lot of what the Ashley’s are about. They don’t pay attention to the rules and instead write their own. They held their very own prom because they didn’t like the schools prom, like that’s just iconic behavior. Even in their individual lives, they’re achieving their own goals. Whether that’s defying their mother, haunting people, dancing, or spreading rumors, they’re out their living their best and not really letting anything hold them back from getting what they want. 

That’s My Girl - Fifth Harmony

Destiny said it, you got to get up and get it Get mad independent and don't you ever forget it Got some dirt on your shoulder, then let me brush it off for ya If you're feeling me, put your five high That's my girl

Ending it with a banger about girls supporting girls!! Because that’s what these four are all about! Even at the expense of other people !! 

[miyu-hyperfixates]

The Untamed and MDZS appreciation and recommendation post

Okay so fair warning to my small amount of followers, this blog will probably be full of MXTX contents starting from now, because I’ve fallen into MXTX’s hell and I don’t see myself climbing out any time soon.

I’m not even kidding in the span of three months, I’ve watched CQL (like 4 times), watched the special edition, watch the MDZS donghua, read the novel, read the manhua, read a fair amount of fics, discovered the SVSSS’s characters through a few crossover fanfics, started to read SVSSS, then TGCF (as well as their respective manhua up to the last translated chapters) and well generally immersed myself into the fandoms. And I LOVE it! And I have so, so many feelings and thoughts about the characters, the plots, the relationships, everything, that I don’t even know where to start! 

Okay so for those who don’t know what the hell I’ve talking about. MXTX stands for Mò Xiāng Tóng Xiù who is the author of three amazing novels: Mo Dao Zu Shi (MDZS) [also called Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation], The Scum Villain’s Self-Saving System (SVSSS) and Tian Guan Ci Fu (TGCF) [Heaven Official’s Blessing]. The Untamed or Chen Qing Ling (CQL) is the chinese drama adaptation of her most well known (as of now) novel MDZS.

I am going to talk about CQL/The Untamed and MDZS (novel version) in this post... But it will probably be followed by posts about TGCF and SVSSS too.

I’ve tried to be pretty vague on several points so that should keep the spoilers at minimum, in case you didn’t watch CQL yet.

[More under the cut] 

Okay so as someone of Asian descent who was born and raised in an European country and spent her formative years watching wuxia and xianxia, The Untamed/CQL is the kind of representation that I really didn’t know I needed and I am so, so glad that I gave it a chance. (Big, big thanks to @shit-happens-bitchachos for reblogging so much CQL contents that the frequent presence of it on my dash got me curious  enough to start watching it).

Watching The Untamed for the first time feels like coming back to a home that you once thought would be frigid but actually became very warm and welcoming without you noticing because you have been away for so long. And it feels both nostalgic and new, in the best possible way. It’s a wonderful feeling, really. 

Where to find it?

You can watch the drama english sub version on Netflix, Viki or Youtube, just typed “The Untamed” and you should find the episodes easily.

To be honest, though I am very thankful for the existence of such platform, I have a slight [read huge] dislike of Netflix’s choice of translation for any Asian movie/tv shows. I mean I’m not going to go off on a debate about official translation vs fan translation, nor westernization and how doing so not only take off a huge layer of subtle/or not so subtle communication but also participate to erase part of the culture. [Because I have opinions about this and I am still very much so cringing about all the “Yanli”s, it is really not the point I’m trying to make right now. ]

So out of the three version, I’d lean more on the Viki version. To be clear though this choice isn’t based on the accuracy of the translation, but strictly on the choice of naming and title convention.

As for the novel, you can find  here a complete english translation made by the Exiled Rebels Scanlations group.

The plot

I’m not going to go into detail about the plot, because I’m sure a lot of people out there managed to do so in a way more articulate way that I ever could.

So basically CQL is about Wei Wuxian, aka the Yiling Patriarch. The Yiling Patriarch is like this huge urban legend that everyone warns their children about, except he actually existed. Why such a reputation? Well, in a Cultivation society where people used spiritual energy to fight and exorcise creatures full of resentful energy (such as ghost, ghouls and other things), the Yiling Patriarch is actually the guy who decided that he was going to use resentful energy to fight resentful energy. What he is doing is called “demonic cultivation” and if you want a western equivalent it would be quite close to using necromancy. And if you want an idea of how blasphemous such method of cultivation is deemed, it would be the equivalent of going to a Christian exorcist organization and yelling loud and clear to all the people there that you’re gonna desecrate the tombs of all holy people and use their corpses to fight ghost and other dark creatures.

So the legend/story of the Yiling Patriarch goes as follow: The Yiling Patriarch and his army of corpses were actually quite useful to turn over the tide of a war that shook the foundations of the Cultivation World, annihilating the strongest Sect of the five Great Cultivation Sects (that lorded over the cultivation society). But some time afterwards the Yiling Patriarch revealed his true colors, and killed more than 3000 cultivators (among them his elder sister and her husband - orphaning their one month old son) before finally ended up being killed by his own little brother.

And now sixteen (or thirteen in the novel) years later, Wei Wuxian’s soul got called back because of a dark ritual. The ritual involved giving up their own soul and offering their body to summon up the soul of a dead, evil, person. The soul summoned would have to accomplish the task the summoner wished for, or the soul would be forever destroyed without being able to ever reincarnate. And so, Wei Wuxian woke up in the body of Mo Xuanyu, a young man who was abused by his family and wished for revenge. While trying to work out what he is supposed to do, Wei Wuxian quickly realized that the Mo family is actually being targeted by fierce corpses that are acting way more aggressively than they should. Turns out that it was because of a possessed spirit sword [a cut out arm in the novel].

Afterwards he encounters Lan Wangji, an esteemed cultivator, one of the strongest of his generation, coming from one of the most righteous Cultivation Sect. And the thing is, Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji appear to have quite a complicated history that dates back to their teenage years. And CQL/MDZS is not only about how they decided to investigate the mystery of the possessed sword/arm (which ended up digging up a lot of secrets and conspiracy ), but also about Wei Wuxian’s past, starting from when he was 15 and meeting Lan Wangji for the first time.

The few things that you’re probably going to feel/think while watching the few first episodes

Confusion I think I’m not even kidding when I say you’re supposed to be in a state of perpetual confusion for the first two episodes... There’s this huge info dump, in the first five minutes of episode 1, then you’ll have to navigate this new world feeling as confused as dead-for-sixteen years Wei Wuxian... You’ll meet dozens of characters and if you can’t remember their names or who they are it’s normal don’t worry. Each character has a birth name (Wei Ying, Lan Zhan) and a courtesy name that (Wuxian, Wangji)... And so if you see Wei Ying or Wei Wuxian just know that it refers to the same person. And to complicate things further some characters also have a title (Yiling Patriarch, Hanguang-Jun)  other people might use to refer to them. So really, if you want to understand what is going on, you might want to note the name, title and relationship down... But it’s kinda tedious?  I promise it is unnecessary as those characters will all be introduced properly in the flash-back starting at the end of episode 2, and you’ll fully be able to get used to them and keep track of them. Of course, if you managed to remember a few names, once the character is being introduced in the past, you’ll get a “ Oh so at some point, this is going to happen to them” sort foreshadowing/foreknowledge, which is neat, I guess. [I recommend going back to watch the first two episodes, once the flash-back is over, to fully grasp what was going on there].

What the hell am I even watching? Okay so this one might only just be me but I was pretty hooked by the story by episode 3... and then I reached episode 8 and 9 and I kid you not, I went “Oh boy... that’s.... yeah okay... *cover face with hands*”... So I was cringing pretty hard for those two episodes out of second-hand embarrassment at the extras actors acting level... Like woah... It was supposed to be scary and threatening and all but I couldn’t just take them seriously? (You’ll know what I’m talking about when you get there)... That with some plot points made me seriously consider stopping right there.... But thankfully I didn’t. So you really just need to pass the first two episodes [which are really good] and cringe your way through the two most abyssal episodes in the show (in my opinion) and everything will go smoothly afterwards.  Though to be fair, it might be explained by the fact that no one expected that CQL would have the highest number of reviews of Chinese drama, nor that it would be the highest earning drama of 2019 and certainly not that it would accumulate 8 billions views on Tennent by May 2020. Where am I going with this?  Well it was certainly no Game of thrones in terms of budget... That’s what I’m trying to say. It had a low budget production... and well in a fantasy world where everyone and their grandma use supernatural power to fight each other and demonic creatures, special effects are a must. Choices had had to be made [and while I am very thankful for the aspects they decided to use the money on] the special effects were very touch and go.

Okay but are they going to be together or is this another case of queerbaiting? So if what you’re asking is “will we ever get a kiss, a love confession or definite proof of their relationship?”. The very short answer is “No.” You’ll never see any of those on screen for the very simple and good reason that there are censorship laws in China regarding queer relationship on screen. “So it’s basically queerbaiting?” Again no. CQL was adapted from a BL chinese novel. In the novel there is absolutely no room for doubts that they are together. But because of the censorship the producer teams had to remove all definite and obvious proof of romance, but it also means that they had to be creative and anything in the subtext or subtle areas was a go. Like really they crammed more homoerotic text (like at this point is this even subtext) in the show than in all other kinds of adaptations (including the novel, where we get kissing, sex and eloping). It got the point that contrarily to the novel, donghua and manhua where the whole Cultivation world thought Lan Wangji hated Wei Wuxian and that they couldn’t stand each other,in the show everybody and their dogs knew that the two were very close.  Also, while I absolutely hate that those censor law exist and am very disappointed that such homophobic mentality still exist and that we won’t get a full adaptation and explicit of their love story, I must say that because of this my demisexual ass absolutely love the depiction of their love in the show. I mean, when you don’t have the “easy way out” of kissing and sex and so all to show that they is definitively romance material going on here... You have to get creative, you have to convey it with all other gestures... touching, gazing at each other and so on... And it creates such a soft but intense  and intimate environment around them...By the way I’m not trying to negate their sexual relationship in the novel (#LetWangxianFreelyExpressTheirSexualLives)... I’m just saying that I’m not sure the producing teams would have gotten to such a length in the show if they could just have adapted the explicit romance scenes. Now if somehow they’d had managed to keep the same level of intense subtext and be able to adapt the romance scenes too, that would have been the best, but well...

The reasons you should still absolutely watch/read it? 

The plot

The way all those character journeys and stories are interwoven in such a cohesive picture is nothing short of amazing. And the way that Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji unravel events that happened more than a decade ago piece by piece [or rather body part by body part] is so very well done. And of course half way through, you think that you’ve got the full pictures, and you’re sort of gloating all the while because you see it coming from miles away and how can the cast be that stupid... And well you are not wrong. Watch out for the canary though.   The show chose to move a few things in term of timeline (character appearing and events happening way before they were supposed to... )... They also added a few original plot points in the past.... So as a results it feels slightly less cohesive and coherent than in the novel. Anyway I won’t go into details here because I’ve got this super long post planned where I’d detailed all the differences between the novel and the show and why some things worked in my opinion but not other. CQL and MDZS are what a properly balanced plot-driven and character-driven show/novel look like.

The relationships

Of course, Wangxian (Wei Wuxian/Lan Wangji) should absolutely be mentioned. Because throughout the story in the past, you watch as young, wild, ingenious, thinking-out-of-box Wei Wuxian meet an equally young seemingly inflexible, impassive, following 3000+ rules in his daily lives Lan Wangji, you watch how their personality clashes before finally acknowledging each other skills, you watch how they hurt during the war, how quickly they had to grew up, you watch how one of them had to watch the other walking down a quickly crumbling path, being alienated by the world without being able to help, you watch how they lost each other, before finally finding each other again after sixteen/thirteen years. And then you can finally watch how soft they are with each other, how in-sync they are, the trust, the devotion, the willingness to stand by each other against the whole fucking world. And as I already mentioned before, because of the censure law in China, you’ll never can’t and will never get to see Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian say “I love you” to each other on the show. It still manages to convey “I love you” in every other possible way without having them actually say the words. I mean at this point it can’t even be considered subtext... It’s plain text written in bold underlined font that can be read in every single one of their interactions, and sometimes even when the other isn't even there, [It's basically subtitles! Hah! Okay getting out of there].

It helps that the chemistry between the two actors is absolutely mind-blowing. And the acting is nothing short of amazing. If you’ve been in the spn fandom then you might know that Jensen is king of the micro-expressions ... well I’m afraid that he has been dethroned by Wang Yibo (Lan Wangji’s actor) in my mind.

But really, wangxian is not the only relationship worth mentioning in CQL/MDZS. One of the other huge highlight in my opinion is the several siblings dynamics. There are about seven sets of siblings among the whole cast and because shitty, shittier and shittiest parents were apparently the norm for their generation, we get to see the trope of “eldest child basically raised their younger siblings” in five different flavors. Of course the main focus is on Wei Wuxian and his siblings, but it doesn’t mean that you can’t see the sheer care and protectiveness oozing out of the other four sets of siblings. As someone who loves family bonding (and especially found families), I really appreciate the fact that among those sets of siblings, there are some that are related by blood, some who are half-siblings and some who are not related biologically but consider themselves siblings regardless. And while all their relationships are different - because they are different people - they all do share the same love for their siblings.  “How far are you willing to go for your siblings?” “How much are you ready to sacrifice for them?” The show answers those two questions in various all throughout the story in a more or less oblique way, and right there lies the motivation behind a lot of the characters’ actions, good or bad. Their relationship with their siblings is actually one of the major driving force of the characters (Wei Wuxian among them). And I love it, because it shows that love comes in a many, many forms.

  The overarching themes

“What’s right, what’s wrong? Who’s good, who’s evil? Who’s strong, who’s weak?”

In such an elitist society who will judge you at the drop of a hat (especially if you have the bad taste of coming from a more unfortunate lineage), how can you define the difference between “right” and “wrong”? Wherein the midst and the aftermath of a blood thirsty war, the distinction between “good” and “evil” more often than only lies on where you were born and/or your family name rather than where you actually stood or what you did in the war. This right here is the very huge underlying theme that is being woven throughout the show/novel. Not only are we, the viewer/reader, invited to think/judge for ourselves based on the actions of the characters... But our main character, Wei Wuxian verbalizes those doubts and questions explicitly a few times and implicitly in the stand and choices that he decided to take. And due to Wei Wuxian’s influence, Lan Wangji who is used to follow his 3000+ rules on a daily life basis without ever questioning them, starts to do so. (“Do not befriend evil.”, “Be righteous.” )  What does it mean to be righteous? Must the notion of righteousness always align with general opinion? How do you define the ‘evil’ that you are not supposed to befriend? Is my definition the same as yours? Is my definition the same as the rest of the world? And if it is not the case, does it necessarily means that I’m in the wrong?  And the very obvious answer to those questions is “No, there is no visible line between ‘right’ and ‘wrong’, ‘good’ or ‘evil’... Nor is there any universally agreed on way to act in order to fit in one category or the other...” And this answer is illustrated in all the ways those numerous characters are depicted: their love, their hatred, their fear, their pain, their joys, their tears, their motivations, their frustrations, their shortcomings, their hidden or not so hidden agenda, their flaws... All of them are depicted in such an awesome and wholesome human way.  They are not fully good or fully bad, they are human, with all that it entails... Main characters and main villains included (or rather, I’d say especially them) [Though the show tended smooth and cover this aspect a little bit more than the novel in my opinion]  

“Don't you understand? When you’re standing on their side, you’re the bizarre genius, the miraculous hero, the force of the rebellion, the flower that blooms alone. But the second your voice differs from theirs, you’ve lost your mind, you’ve ignored morality, you’ve walked the crooked path.” (Jiang Cheng)

Another theme that is strongly address here is the matter of “Public Opinion”. Despite (or rather because of) how fickle it is, public opinion, rumors (no matter how unfounded) could so easily ruins your reputation, your standing. And if you loose their favors than all your previous actions (no matter how praised it had been in the past) would be seen with a blackened lens. I remember feeling as frustrated as Wei Wuxian at the lack of logic, the rhetoric employed and the sheer hypocrisy that had been portrayed by the mass. I think that there is one character that can be easily recognized as the pure personification of “Public Opinion”, he is without a doubt meant to be the “voice of the mass, of the bystanders whose opinions shouldn’t really matter but actually does a lot”. I won’t tell who it is, it’s pretty obvious if you watch the show... And I think that we are meant to feel annoyed at such characters. I think we are meant to be as frustrated as that one character who at a mass gathering tried to make a stand, tried to do the right thing, but was quickly shut down with dubious rhetoric and blatant disregard because their voice didn’t carry enough power. And last but not least, the show/novel broaches the issue of how social standing is considered very, very much dependent on your circumstance of birth. Like I said before the cultivation world in CQL/MDZS is inherently elitist. In order to be able to cultivate you must learn the proper techniques and at a quite young age. But it is not something that you could do on your own unless you’re some kind of genius or prodigy. Which means that you must attract the attention of a nearby sects or begs them to take you in as a disciple. It means though that you’ll probably start a little later than the disciples that were born directly within the sect [inner disciples], meaning you’ll probably end being weaker. However even if by some truly dedication and perseverance you manage to the same level as the inner disciples, you’ll still only be seen as an outer disciples, nothing more than cannon fodder in the eyes of society. In all the major sects, there is a distinctive mark, objects that only disciples coming from the sect family line are allowed to carry, as an irrevocable sign of their high standing in society and their inherent privileges. There are some exceptional circumstances though where someone of low birth status might reach this elitist sphere. But no matter how high they reach, how outstanding they are, in some way they will always be reminded (sometimes behind their backs, sometimes subtly, sometimes right in their face) of the stigma of their birth. There are three characters in particular, whose journeys mirror and foil each other a lot.   And I think it is very interesting to see this “son of a prostitute” or “son of a servant” or “street rat” or “bastard” advanced through society. They all received very different upbringings, despite all starting more or less at a low point. And I liked that the way they decided to live later on and how they tackle/handle the cultivation world  is very much reflected and influenced by their upbringings rather than the circumstances of their birth. It brings up this very strong message that, if they are the way they are it is not because of who their parents are, but rather how the people around them reacted to them. The way they are right now is not the fruit of their birth but a direct consequences of the rejection/acceptance of society. And so when you look at them, you can’t help but see their journeys as a three forking road paths reflecting the other like twisted mirrors. You look at their actions now, then back their different circumstances and you can’t help but think “Ah, that is what might happened if things were different.” [There is a reason that canon-divergence and time travel fix-it are my favorite tropes... my bias is really showing here... haha] And it really, really hammers on the importance of kindness in the face of misery and discrimination. Kindness  and acceptance at the right moment, no matter how small can change everything. Sometimes, something even as small as a candy.  

The movie sets and props So I mentioned before that the budget of CQL really wasn’t that high and they had to make choices. And I could only applaud their choices, because really, wah! Just look at the main sects locations, the scenery, the backgrounds. It’s so beautiful!! [Had I had any gifing talent I would have included them so that you could get the full mind-blowing experience... so I’ll just send you to @gusucloud​ blog, where all the gifs and edits are amazing, (Cloud Recesses here and Lotus Pier here) and in this post  have my lame-ass screenshots instead.]

The fine details, the workmanship in most of the props in the background, the swords!!! *Incoherent flailing*

[I didn’t manage to get any close-up of the swords... but believe me, they are piece of arts!]

The music

The soundtrack of the show is absolutely amazing and beautiful.

You know how in movies and tv shows couples always seem to have “a song”... like “Oh! Look our song is playing!”... Weeeeeell...

Wangxian do too and it’s literally their song, as in their actors are singing it. You can of course hear it in the ending, but... but! I think the way it was used within the episode was very striking. It’s one of the many ways the producer teams managed to convey the romantic aspect of their relationship. And it was very well done.

Wuji, by Xiao Zhan and Wang Yibo

Wuji, instrumental piano + flute + Zither version

Just imagine, dude just resurrected from his 16 years of deadness and you see him moping at night by playing this beautiful tune with a freaking leaf... just because he saw some cultivators wearing the same uniform as Lan Wangji... So at this point you know that this song might means something but well, you don’t really get it...

The second time you hear this tune, we are on a mountain, and it’s through a bamboo flute that Wei Wuxian used to appease and calm down an agitated corpse [who he apparently knows]... He is luring ‘it’ out to a safe place, so he is playing the song while slowly moving back one step at a time. Then his back suddenly bumps into someone... This person catches his hand. The flute playing abruptly stops and the full instrumental version with piano+flute is suddenly blaring out in the background. And then it’s as if the whole world stops as they gaze at each other, while the music keeps playing. And really, you might fully understand the weight of their gazes, or their history, but you know that it’s there... That’s the moment where you look at them looking at each other, grasping at each other wrist, where you can still hear their song in the background... and can only go “Oh. Oh.”  [Then of course a purple ball of pure anger just had to come and interrupt them. Excuse you, they were quickly having a moment there. Kidding aside, It was such a nice scene, it’s hand down one of my favorite scene of the whole show, and the music played a really huge part in my opinion.]

And if it wasn’t enough to hammer it down. The third times will definitively do it. So both of them are fifteen years and meet each other for the first time, when Wei Wuxian goes to study at Lan Wangji’s sect. Of course there first impression of each other is disastrous, what’s with Wei Wuxian insisting to come inside despite having lost his invitation and Lan Wangji clearly stating that no one is allowed without invitation. Of course it doesn’t help that after running back to fetch his lost invitation, Wei Wuxian snuck in after curfew (breaking a protective ward on his way), while smuggling two jar of alcohol. All of the above are forbidden in Cloud Recess, by the way. So our boy just casually broke three rules and then who catch him, right when he is climbing over the wall? Lan Wangji, who’s on patrol, of course. [Like I said, disastrous first impression]...And so after frostily listing all the rules Wei Wuxian broke not even five minutes in , Lan Wangji tries to bring Wei Wuxian to be disciplined. Wei Wuxian, of fucking course, resists. And the two proceed to fight (sword and all).

Cue their song playing as they cross swords on the rooftop of Cloud recesses, under the light of a full moon night.

If that is not a meet-cute I don’t know what it is.

Anyway this song is played many, many more times in the show and I’m not talking about them because I don’t want to spoil anyone.

Also as an aside, they don’t appear in the show... But there are character songs that have been recorded. Some of them sung by the actual actors and other not. And while all of them are really good, if there is absolutely one that you must listen to, it’s “Bu Wang” by Wang Yibo the actor of Lan Wangji.  Make sure to watch the official MV only after watching the whole show (because it’s spoilery) and to activate the cc for the lyrics translation. It’s such a beautiful and painful song; and a very insightful reflection of Lan Wangji’s character.  I love it.

Lan Sizhui and A-Yuan

No argument or explanation needed, you’ll see when you get there. I dare you not to like those small fluffy cinnamon rolls! 

The Junior Quartet

Okay those ducklings deserve a whole sub-section on their own. Not only because they are all amazing kids but because of what they represent.  

What is really great here is that since the story takes place over the span of 16/13 years, you get to see three different generations at various stage of their development. In the past you get to see the parents generation at their sum-up while there child, the following generation [Wei Wuxian, Lan Wangji etc] from their teenage years to young adulthood. Then in the present you see the teenagers reaching the age their parents were (more or less, probably slightly younger) and the next generation (the ducklings) about the same age as Wei Wuxian’s generation were at the beginning. And the juxtaposition between the two pictures is just so, so very telling because the differences are glaring.

I’m going to borrow the words from qrbat who wrote this wonderful fanfiction, “tell some storm” on ao3.

The parents generation was a generation of Pride and Greed, it was a generation that lauded standing your ground no matter what and refusing outsider help. They were the generation which raised their children as a “generation of War”. A war that they started and that their children, teenagers, had to fight and end for them. And in comparison the junior generation seems so unexperienced so soft... and that’s a good thing, because it means that those children hadn’t had to experience the hardship of war, hadn’t had to grow up so fast because they basically didn’t have any decent parental figures to help them. Instead of perpetuating the cycle of hate and war started by their elders, the generation of War raised the next generation as a generation of peace, as a “generation of Love” and acceptance.

And it is amazing because the juniors, simply by being who they are, are embodying  this  message from Wei Wuxian’s generations to their parents “See? This is what it means to parent. I had to sacrifice my childhood and innocence to fight your war and I still managed to raise such amazing and kind children, what was your freaking excuse? I will not be like you. Times are changing and they are changing for the better.”

.

.

*Look at length of the post* *snort* Right. Okay, would you believe me, if I told you that in the beginning this post was supposed to be an appreciation post for all three of MXTX’s works and not just MDZS because I was afraid it would be too short? Yup so turned out I had a lot more things to say than I thought.  Please feel free to react or just message me about anything MXTX’s fandom related... I am desperately in need of friends to discuss with about MXTX’s stuff!   

[catholicartistsnyc]

Meet Ontario-Based Artist Laurie-Lynn McGlynn

LAURIE-LYNN MCGLYNN is a painter (oils and acrylics) living in Caledon, Ontario, Canada. (http://g1313.org/portfolio/laurie-lynn-mcglynn/)

CATHOLIC ARTIST CONNECTION (CAC): Where are you from originally, and what brought you to your current city?

LAURIE-LYNN MCGLYNN (LM): I was born in the city of Toronto - have lived all over Canada and parts of the United States when growing up, and later traveled abroad to Scotland, England and France. Both parents are from the Maritime provinces (Nova Scotia and Newfoundland), so I was fortunate to have spent many summers by the sea.

CAC: How do understand your vocation as a Catholic artist? Do you call yourself a Catholic artist? 

LM: Although I do not claim to be a Catholic Artist per see, I do not hide it either. However, my practice of art making is not confined to being a reflection of my faith. In my opinion, the two go hand in hand, and cannot be separated. This gift I have, to express myself and to communicate my thoughts about the world around me in a visual way, is completely from God. No argument there. But how I choose to use this tool of communication has been left up to me. I can hone this ability in any way I choose. 

Some artists will deny the origin of their gift and continue to make work that pleases the world. Others may choose to build their practice upon the premise of their faith and will advertise it in such a way. Personally, I feel that as long as the work I create is true to who I am and conveys what I want to say, then I have been sincere to my craft and to my Lord for giving me this gift in the first place. 

I am in awe of artists who can successfully depict a Christian experience. I say successfully because there are artists who can create religious art with technical proficiency that is reminiscent of early Christian art. However, does this reflect the true nature of the artist and their innermost desire to communicate the sacred? Or is it an imitation of religious art from the past? 

What excites me the most as a Catholic artist are those moments when I am creating something with my own hands and an inconceivable joy fills my heart, nudging me to continue. To me that is a true expression of faith. 

CAC: Where have you found support in the Church for your vocation as an artist?

LM: Our parish priest, although now retired, has always been a supporter of visual art, especially that which inspires people to open their hearts and be brave...perhaps to share their own talents and gifts with others. There are many people in our communities who have not had the privilege of attending an art school, or any post-secondary institution for that matter. Whenever I am asked to discuss my work or share it for a fundraising activity, I am honored to do so.

CAC: Where have you found support among your fellow artists for your Catholic faith?

LM: Now, this can be a tricky question but I am glad you asked! As a Canadian emerging visual artist, I can honestly say that many of my peers have decided to keep their faith separate from their practice. The reason is mostly due to the nature of the public gallery and how the curator or director feel it will be perceived. It really depends on what the context is, and how the artist chose to frame their faith within that context. For example, when Chris Ofili exhibited The Holy Virgin Mary (1996), there was a huge uproar within the gallery scene, with the public and with the Mayor of NYC threatening to cut funding to the gallery. Many considered this work to be blasphemous and saw it as a purposeful stab at the Catholic church. Yet, the artist himself claimed that the work was not meant to be taken that way ... perhaps not to be taken so seriously. Either way, it certainly brought a lot of attention to the artist and his practice, which is fine if you can handle that type of publicity.  I feel this is why many emerging artists stay clear of that kind of attention, especially in the early stages of their careers.

CAC: How can the Church be more welcoming to artists?

LM: There was a time when the Church was a patron of the arts, just as the rich and powerful were and still are. In 1999 when Saint Pope John Paul II wrote his Letter to Artists, he brought a lot of attention to the arts and encouraged the faithful to embrace their gifts and talents with the world, for the sake of beauty but also for the glory of God. I feel there is a gap somewhere in how we perceive artists, their status in the Church and what impact the arts can still have on the faithful. Perhaps this needs to begin in the parish, where the simple act of commissioning an artist to create a piece for the Church. The parishioners will all see the work, some will like it, others may not. But the artist will have contributed to parish life, to worship etc. There are plenty of other ways in which the Church could embrace the arts as a vital link in the community, but I fear it will take over the interview!

So far, I have come across a great deal of support from the Orthodox Church in our area. Unfortunately, I have yet to find the same support for the arts in our local parishes.

CAC: How can the artistic world be more welcoming to artists of faith?

LM: Another brilliant question! It depends on how important this is to the artist and how they perceive their practice. As stated earlier, I do not include my faith as part of the description of my practice. The process of creating is what is sacred to me, and forms a bond between my soul and my God. However, if I were creating work that was meant to be taken in a religious or faith based context (iconography for example), I would most likely work within that paradigm and hope that my parish could help promote my work to other parishes. I would not expect public galleries to be open to accepting my work unless it was within the theme of an exhibition. But that is just my experience, and it could be quite different for others depending on where their art is exhibited and how it is promoted.

CAC: Where do you go to get inspired?

LM: Having formed my own collective, may be an answer here! I was weary of not being able to share my faith with my cohort in art school, so I decided to put a small group together. Our goal is bring together talented artists from a variety of disciplines, and perform together. We are called MOTUS and we are dance, music, choral vocals, libretto, and digital technology...and we all have faith. We come together in a welcoming environment which allows each of us to relax in the knowledge that we are all there because of God. Now where do we go from here?

MOTUS is a great example of how my visual and written tools of communication are also expressions of my love for God, for Christ and for God’s people. The prose I write is sacred and honours our Lord in every way imaginable ... from the tiniest breath of spring to the turmoil we humans face each day. The only way I could do this, or find an audience for it, was just to get a few people together with similar ideals and it went from there. If it is Gods will, nothing will stop it.

CAC: What is your daily spiritual practice? And if you have a spiritual director, how did you find that person? If you go on retreats, where do you like to go?

LM: My retreat experience has been group-based, but I am currently preparing for a monastic contemplative retreat in another province. The abbey is located outside of Montreal, Quebec, and follows the Benedictine rule of monastic life. My spiritual director is a retired parish priest and long time friend of the family. I look forward to engaging in a solo retreat, and speaking with one of the cloistered sisters about a call to be an Oblate. This is something I have been discerning for many years, and I feel now is the time to be proactive.

CAC: What is your daily artistic practice? And what are your recommendations to other artists for practicing their craft daily?

LM: Researching an idea or concept. Writing out my thoughts and feelings. Sketches may or may not come as part of this process. Then the rest will either manifest in the studio or it will phase into something else. Either way, it’s never a lost cause, as everything means something to an artist.

CAC: Describe a recent day in which you were most completely living out your vocation as an artist. What happened, and what brought you the most joy?

Right now! Sitting here writing these thoughts out for you is a reminder of my vocation and how important my contributions are to the world around me. It’s the smallest things that help build the foundation for the big things. There was a time years ago when I was so uncertain about my future as an artist. I worried that unless I studied medicine, became a doctor or nurse, or worked with the marginalized, the poor, children, elderly etc...then how could I possibly be giving back something to God...to His people? But a very good friend reminded me that one does not need to lead a life of service to serve. My gift from God is in many ways a mirror that reflects back the beauty He creates for us. And that is good enough for me.

CAC: How do you afford housing and support yourself as an artist?

LM: My husband is very supportive of my work and we work together to be able to afford what we need in life, and my practice. I receive grants, bursaries, and artist fees from exhibitions. I also work freelance on the side as a content writer.

CAC: What other practical resources would you recommend to a Catholic artist living in your city? LM: Any way to network is a great way to get started! Joining a local gallery and volunteering a few hours...social media...websites. Attending exhibitions, talking to other artists, entering calls for entry, submitting proposals.

CAC: What are your top pieces of advice for Catholic artists post-graduation?

LM: Know your audience, which means you first must know what type of work you are creating. I dabbled in printmaking while in art school and I will often combine a few lino-block prints in an exhibition. But my medium is paint and I do not enter printmaking calls for entry. 

Know what you are good at, and work on that. If you feel called to create work that is meant to enlighten your viewers within a religious context, then make sure you source out your market. Otherwise, you could become disappointed fast. I find that in the very early stages of building an art practice, it is best to take some time to work on your portfolio...make the stuff you love, now that the assignments are over! 

Take time to utilize your new skills and apply them to what feels truly you. If you are honest with yourself, and let the work be a true reflection of what you are called to create, not what the art world insists is the next hottest item, then you cannot go wrong! Praying always helps by the way!

A huge thank you to Catholic Artist Connection for opening up this ongoing discussion for artists. I pray that every artist reading this interview will at least take one small thing from it and apply it to their own practice. God Bless.

[we-pay-for-everything]

Hopefully fun challenge: can you talk about three things you love more about TVD than BTVS and three things you love more about BTVS than TVD? You can pick more than three if you come up with more!

This is fun!

Things TVD did better than BtVS:

1. Kept the show fun, interesting, and consistent. I know seasons 4 to 8 of TVD are messy, but they’re still better, funner, and more consistently engaging than seasons 4 to 7 of BtVS. I love TVD seasons 5 and 6, but I’m bored by the correspondent BtVS seasons. Even when TVD was a giant mess, it was an entertaining mess that didn’t assassinate its characters quite as badly as BtVS did. The TVD lore also makes more sense than the BtVS lore. Anything can happen on TVD, and with that in mind, it’s easy to go with the flow and enjoy the story no matter how crazy it gets. But BtVS is more grounded and when the story became very dramatic, “dark”, and complicated, the show lost its charm. 

2. Kept the characters true to themselves. BtVS changes a lot each season, and the latter seasons are so relationship oriented, that the characters become strangers sometimes. It’s not that TVD didn’t ruin its characters at times, but, in general, my opinion of the characters doesn’t vary wildly from season to season. I know who the characters are, and they change accordingly to the progression of the show. The characters remain recognizable to me, which is comforting and natural. Also, some characters on BtVS look dead inside in the latter seasons while the TVD characters are always bursting with feelings, ambition, desires…

3. The relationships. I love Bangel and other BtVS relationships, but the TVD relationships are just more. It’s not just Delena, or Klaroline either. It’s Stefan and Damon; Alaric and Elena (who are cuter than Giles and Buffy); Jeremy and Elena (who are more realistic than Dawn and Buffy); Bonnie, Elena and Caroline (who, in a way, are more organic than Willow, Buffy and Xander); Katherine and Nadia, etc. Damon, Elena, Stefan are a better “love triangle” than Angel, Buffy, Spike; and, Damon, Katherine, Stefan are a better “love triangle” than Angel, Drusilla, Spike. I don’t love every single TVD relationship, but, in general, they make more sense to me, and I’m more invested in them.

4. Mystic Falls vs. Sunnydale. Mystic Falls feels so much more like a real, albeit abnormal, quaint, little town than Sunnydale does. Mystic Falls is a huge part of TVD. We know how it looks; we know its history; we know the council, the founders, the police, the residents. The characters interact with the town in a real way. I care about Mystic Falls because the TVD characters love Mystic Falls and want to make it better. But the BtVS characters are “stuck” in Sunnydale and feel obligated to keep it safe. 

5. The aesthetic of the show. I really like the late 90s look of the first BtVS seasons, but TVD has prettier sets, wardrobe, props, even music sometimes. 

6. Emotion. I know it’s blasphemous to say this, but TVD has a much tighter hold on me and my emotions than BtVS does. Most of the strong emotions BtVS inspires are sad, or Bangel related. TVD makes me cry sometimes, but it also makes me feel complex emotions. The characters and their relationships stir things up deep within. I love the show, and the characters, and I think of them like they’re friends or loved ones. I know a lot of people feel this way about BtVS, but I never did. In the end, I love TVD more than BtVS because of how TVD makes me feel in comparison to BtVS. 

Things BtVS did better than TVD:

1. Morality. BtVS follows a clear moral code, and systematically upholds it. Things mean something on BtVS; the characters’ actions and ideals mean something. And as a result, the show stands for something which is timeless and universal: the complexity of life. TVD has a moral code, but it’s easily broken or contoured. Almost everything is permissible on TVD, and it’s very hard to care, or keep track, of who kills who, and who is in love with a murderer. In the end, it doesn’t matter. 

2. Longevity and innovation. 20 years after it first aired, BtVS is still a unique show, which has inspired countless other shows. Its approach to vampires is still different from any other vampire show out there. Its female characters are still better than most female characters out there. Its LGBT credentials are still better than lots of other shows’ credentials. BtVS is timeless. Its themes are timeless, its characters are timeless. TVD ended two years ago, and it still holds up, but will its legacy be like BtVS’s? Hell no.

3. Themes. BtVS is about growing up, identity, relationships, depression, life in general... Life is truly the big bad in all seasons. It disappoints, it takes, it kills. Reality is our biggest enemy, and more than anything, BtVS is a show about reality, told with metaphors and symbolism. TVD isn’t about much in particular. It’s also about relationships, growing up, life, family, etc. but it’s not meant to be relatable or teach us anything. 

4. Acting. The acting in TVD isn’t bad, but it’s what you’d expect from a series: unimpressive, uninspired. The BtVS characters truly come alive with genuine acting. Not all of the actors are amazing, but they sell their characters well. 

5. Stand out episodes. Most TVD episodes are similar in structure and content. The show is pretty consistent. But BtVS has many episodes which stand out in terms of writing, structure, acting, direction, music, etc. Episodes like The Body and Hush were game-changing. 

6. Better arcs. TVD is all over the place in terms of arcs and pacing. But BtVS is much better structured. There’s always a turning point in the story when the Big Bad is revealed, and another one when the odds are upped. BtVS builds up to the climax of the story much more satisfyingly than TVD. 

And let me end this by saying: BtVS is better than TVD. I enjoy, and in a way, love, TVD more than BtVS, but I’ll defend and love BtVS forever. I might be over TVD is a few months for all I know...

Thanks for the ask!

[badluckcllub]

verse | dnd + meridian campaign  ch | shardia auvryana + veldrin auvryana  summary | the quickest way out of lannercost involves a tense familial meeting.

just some basic backstory building for my dnd oc!  cc: @egosumdivina for reasons. 

The heat of the midday sun beats down over Shardia’s cloaked figure as she sweeps through the streets as inconspicuously as possible, staying close to storefronts and back alleys and away from the crowds that move and shift through the city like a rolling wave. If this were up to her she would wait until nightfall for this meeting, but time is not on her side and her luck has run out.

It has only been a week since she was outed as a spy by the city council of Silverstone, and a single day since Kelhorn ever-so-politely informed her that her services would no longer be needed by him and the Lannercost council and that she had, for all intents and purposes, never worked a single day for them. She was promptly escorted to the city gates like a common criminal and shoved out with nothing but the clothes on her back and the little money she had left from the return journey here.

She waited until nightfall before sneaking back into the city, shielded by the darkness of the clouded sky, and spent the night in a seedy inn drinking in a dimly-lit corner, hoping upon hope that the only plan swirling through her head would get her far from here - perhaps across the coast if she was lucky enough.

The night was spent tossing and turning, the morning much of the same, and now she stalks through the bustling streets to meet with someone she has not seen in months.

Someone she is not even sure will bother extending a helping hand.

She comes upon him at the market, bartering with a homely looking human over some meats with a supply cart parked off to the side. The drow is tall and holds himself with a confidence that reeks of arrogance. His sharp features and deep violet skin tone mimic Shardia’s, hinting at a familial relation that only a blind individual would miss.

Shardia waits until he collects the meat and loads it up into the cart before crossing the street over to her brother.

“Veldrin,” she whispers in greeting, pulling the hood of her cloak back enough to let the sun shine across her face for a second. Recognition flashes across his face followed by the surprise of seeing his sister, but no familial joy follows. Veldrin’s expression returns to one of disinterest, the smallest of sighs escaping his lips as he rearranges supplies.

“Shardia. It’s good to see you,” he says blandly. It’s obviously a lie. 

Her jaw clenches underneath her hood, willing herself to refrain from snapping at his dismissiveness and get to the point.  

“I need your help, Veldrin. I need to get out of the city.”

“I’m sure your surface-dweller friends can help you with that,” he says cooly, barely paying any attention to her as he attends to his business. “I have things to do today.”

“You must know someone,” she presses on, stamping out the flames of irritation threatening to crawl up her throat and burst outwards like a raging firestorm. “People come and go from this city every day. You must know someone going far from here. It doesn’t matter where.”

This catches his attention, and he stills, his gaze turning towards her studiously and her cloaked appearance begins to fit into the narrative of this strange and abrupt meeting. 

“Why are you hiding, Shardia? Is this not your home?” He spits out the last word as if it’s blasphemous to say. “Do you no longer have surface-dwellers to turn to?”

Her hands come up to her hood, tugging nervously at the fabric before smoothing them down the front of her cloak. “It is. It was. Something happened, it doesn’t matter. All I’m asking is for you to point me in the right direction.”

Amusement at her plight dances behind Veldrin’s eyes as he turns to properly face her. She can’t help but think that if she never left home it would be her looking upon him with such arrogance and not the other way around. “Oh? So you’ve finally been discarded of, is that it?” The glee shimmers in red eyes that reflect her own. Veldrin waggles his finger in front of her face, chiding her with a smug smirk tugging gently at the corner of his lips.

Shardia pulls herself to her full height which isn’t much to speak of, but her brother has always made her raise her hackles over one thing or another. “Like you’re better off than I, Veldrin. Stuck ferrying supplies to and from the Underdark for people who would sooner spit on you than treat you like an equal.” His eyes narrow darkly, his amusement snuffing out like a candle deprived of oxygen.

This has been the greatest point of contention between them. All those years ago he agreed to help sneak her out of the Underdark, but he chided her then, too. He told her she would be nothing more than fodder for the surface-dwellers to use on the frontlines of whatever battles they fought. She told him that he was nothing more than fodder for his own family considering the way the men are treated below. It’s known well enough between the two that it’s not something they will ever resolve, but bring it up whenever the opportunity presents itself just to push the buttons of the other.

“At least I was making decent gold. At least I have freedom.”

Veldrin scoffs. “You call your life a free one? You did not work with them, you worked for them. Never forget that, Shardia.” He pulls himself up onto the carriage, forcing an abrupt ending to the uncomfortable and escalating argument. “I don’t know what mess you’ve gotten into nor do I particularly care, but someone owes me a favour and it’s likely she can help you. I can take you to her now granted I get something in return.”

Her jaw clenches again, knowing he wants coin and she has so little left, but what other choice does she have? She rummages around in her coin purse for three gold, leaving her with nothing but two gold left for her troubles. Slapping it into his gloved hands, she then pulls herself up onto the carriage, tugging once more at her hood.

“Don’t take this to mean I’ll come help you any old time you need it,” he says, leading the horses out of the market.

“Oh, believe me, sweet brother. I never expect anything from you. This is just a pleasant surprise.” Shardia focuses her eyes forward, hoping to blend into the background of the city, chewing on her bottom lip. Truth is, her relief at this turn of events is palpable, muscles unwiring with the tension that’s been stringing her up for a week.

She’s close to escape, and that’s all that matters, her brother’s admonishments be damned. 

[xthebirdofhermesx]

Hellsing: The Return - Chapter 2

Chapter 2! Oh Section XIII... what you do’n?

(∩｀-´)⊃━☆ﾟ.*･｡ﾟ WHAT WILL HAPPEN NEXT?! ｡ﾟ･*.｡ﾟ☆--c(`-' ∩) 

MATURE CONTENT FOLKS. There’s violence, strong language, smut, and gore cause... well Hellsing. No warnings beyond that currently (no sexual violence or anything like that), so have at thee if ya like. All Chapters compiled here, but I’ll be posting inline for anyone who just tumblrz.

Chapter 2 - Divine Intervention

“Chief Makube,” Integra said walking into the foyer of Hellsing Manor by herself, “To what do I owe the pleasure of you staying in the lobby today, unlike yesterday?”

The older man was tall, Italian, and bore a scar over his right eye that stretched from forehead to jawline. He smiled and spread his hands gracefully, as if to indicate he was also alone. “Today I have no children to entertain,” he smiled. “S’cuzzi for not being able to conclude all business yesterday, Sir Hellsing… but I’m afraid the Vatican does not know that today, I am here.”

Seras, having been leaning against the banister with crossed arms and a dower expression, raised an eyebrow and looked to her human master. That… was a fishy statement from the head of Section XIII, Iscariot Division. Integra was no less impressed or concerned, but her expression remained stoic.

“Well, you have my attention,” she said and turned. “Please, follow me. My office will be more comfortable.”

Up the stairs and to the only door visible from below, Integra lead the way to her office as Makube and Seras followed. The Knight repressed a smirk as she was the only one to see Alucard’s smile fade into the shadows before she opened the curtains behind her desk. “I can assure you, Chief Makube,” Integra said and nodded for Seras to close the door. As she did so the room flashed with black and red energy, Pip securing the room at Seras’s will. “This room is secured from eavesdropping,” Integra finished with a small smirk.

As she sat behind the desk, Makube sat in front, crossing his legs and weaving his fingers on one knee. “I apologize for dropping in unannounced, Director. Unfortunately the nature of this visit is… sensitive.”

“Not to be indelicate, Chief Makube,” Integra said, lighting a cigar, “But shall we cut to the chase?”

Makube smiled patiently. “Of course. There is a leak, a potential traitor to The Vatican and specifically Section XIII within our ranks. I would like to enlist the aid of the Hellsing Organization to investigate and hopefully find this mole.”

Well. That… had not at all been what Integra, Seras, or even Alucard would have predicted coming from this conversation. As Alucard’s deep laughter began to echo around them, Makube’s expression fell from pleasant to concerned, and eventually to slightly upset when Alucard manifested from the shadows in the corner.

“Oh this is quite the welcome home present,” the ancient vampire chuckled.

“When did this occur?” Makube frowned at Integra.

“Last night, actually. I fear you came to call before any official statement could be released. I’d barely finished breakfast when I was alerted of your arrival.”

“He has a plane to catch,” Seras stated of Makube, Arms crossed and standing now near to her vampiric master.

The Chief swallowed audibly, but regained his composure rather quickly. “Well then this may be all the more swift a resolution. Though I must request as few casualties as possible?”

“We’re not murderers, Makube,” Interga’s tone was flat and unforgiving. “We’re monster hunters.”

“Of course, I was not implying anything. Allow me to explain.” Spreading his hands, the Leader of Section XIII went into detail about a few investigative missions that had gone deadly unexpectedly approximately six months prior. At first it had not raised any concerns as these thing happened occasionally. However it seemed that the number and frequency of these events had been slowly increasing, and it was not until a single survivor confessed with in intensive care that the attackers who’d killed them all were not of the original investigated threat. He was then assassinated that night in his hospital room in Vatican City.

“This has happened now outside of Roma, as well,” Makube pressed the tips of his fingers together, elbows resting on the arms of his chair. “Not only does there seem to be a white clad figure leading an attack against the Vatican, but one of our own is giving them information on where to find our people to take them by surprise and murder them all.”

Integra twisted her cigar between two gloved fingers as she thought. Makube was not his aggressive predecessor Maxwell, nor his embittered subordinate Heinkel Wolfe. Neither was she a fool, and an olive branch from the Vatican could still be a trap. The Vatican as a whole had made no bones about believing the Protestant Knights to be blasphemous, and specifically the Hellsing organization, Integra herself in fact, to be the worst of them. She wasn’t entirely certain if she’d been officially declared a witch in the eyes of Rome or not.

And yet intuition told her Makube was sincere. How frustrating.

“With all due respect, Chief Makube, and I mean that sincerely,” the knight said, tapping ashes from the end of her cigar into the ashtray, “I have a far greater respect and appreciation of your methods and approach than I could ever have for your predecessor. But what guarantees do I have that this is not an elaborate trap for my organization?”

“Outside of my personal word and promise that if it is, I have been kept in the dark and know nothing of such a plot?” he sighed and spread his hands. “None. But if this is a trap for Hellsing, it is not the act of Section XIII or an openly sanctioned operation from the Vatican.”

“How delightfully dangerous,” Alucard chuckled, his grin upsettingly wide.

“I also can guarantee you that even if it is a cu,” Makube added, eyeing the elder vampire, “They might, at best, be prepared for you and Ms. Victoria. No one at the Vatican knows of Alucard’s return, clearly.” Meeting eyes with Integra, the chief smiled. “And I don’t intend to enlighten them at this time.”

That… pushed Integra’s eyebrows up.

“Noted,” she said, keeping all other surprise from her response. “If we agree, what would be expected of us in this endeavor?”

“Discretion. Once we leave this room, I will deny any knowledge of this conversation. I merely came by to apologize  for any offensive comments Agent Heinkel Wolfe made yesterday.” Makube sighed and shook his head. “The most recent attack happened this morning in the wee hours. We received the briefest of communications in the form of a video message from one of ours before they were killed and the phone destroyed. The White Cloaked figure was seen for a brief second. Does it not, to you, seem as if a supernatural threat in Scotland, where this occurred, would be reason enough for Hellsing to investigate?”

“Will the Vatican let us onto the site?” Seras inquired.”

“By the time you arrive, they will not have yet. The scene is being held for their investigation, but you can arrive first. I will… waylay them as long as I can. Heinkel and my assistant have not yet been informed, or Agent Wolfe would very much want to go. However, I will handle that.”

“I see. So we are to go as soon as now, then?” Integra grumbled.

“I know we are not… friends, Sir Hellsing,” Makube started, leaning forward in his chair. “I know that the Vatican sees the Protestants of your Council of Twelve and the Hellsing Organization as heretics, and in the past has been an open enemy. However, we want the same thing - safety of the people, and the end to monsters. And this… has potential to threaten us all.”

“I doubt greatly that a single other member of your organization would agree that we have the same goals,” Integra sighed and stood, snuffing her cigar out. “However I agree that if there is someone hunting the Iscariot, it is at least prudent to make certain that they will not turn their aggression toward Hellsing, The Council or The King once they are done.”

Makube gave a partial smile and nodded, standing to take Integra’s hand as Alucard’s chuckling began to grow in volume. “I will accept that, Sir Hellsing.”

“Should we find this mole along the way, how should we be in contact?”

“A phone call to my mobile will suffice. I should think we can communicate in such a way that anyone near would not decipher the information exchanged.”

With a nod, Integra watched as Seras escorted the man out. When the door was closed she closed her eyes and shook her head. “I do not like this.”

“Oh come now, my master,” Alucard purred in open amusement. “This, will be fun. ”

Integra sighed and cut her eyes to Alucard. “Your definition of fun differs greatly from mine.” Standing, she tilted her head to one side and cracked her neck in the attempts to relieve a newly growing tension. “I will get my things together. Yours are in your rooms below,” she explained and turned to him with a look of narrow suspicion. “Have you been down there yet?”

With a wide grin, Alucard stepped back towards the shadowed corner of her office. “Why look at some dusty old stones, when I have such a lovely view of angels from up here?” But any retort Integra might have had she kept to herself. It was no fun to say it to the wall, and Alucard was gone.

***

“I don’t like it, Master,” Seras grumped from the wall of Integra’s bedroom. She leaned, much as she had downstairs, with arms crossed against the wall. It was a good way to tell when Seras was unhappy about something. She hadn’t pouted in years, not in sincerity. But when she was displeased about something, her face tilted down and she crossed her arms. Everyone had tells, if one knew for what to look.

“I don’t either, Seras,” Integra sighed and tucked the neatly folded change of clothes into her small overnight bag. It was never a poor idea to bring a change of clothes to a murder investigation. Better to not need it than need it and be caught without. “But we won’t know if it is a trap until the trap has been sprung, and if it is not, and Makube actually came to us for help, then perhaps that is a bargaining chip we can use in the future.”

“What could we possibly bargain with the zealots and fanatics for?”

“For them to stay the hell away from us.”

Seras wobbled her head back and forward at that in consideration. “Alright, you have a point there. Want I should get my things?”

“No, I want you to stay here. The men trust you, and as much as these words are foul tasting to fall from my lips, Makube is right. They will not be prepared for Alucard.” Integra sneered. “I hope I never have to say that again.”

“Yeah, that statement physically hurts me to hear from you, Master.”

“ I think I threw up a little myself, ” Pip chimed in.

“EW GROSS NO THROWING UP INSIDE ME!”

“ WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO? Dégueuler all over Integra’s floor?!”

“Children, please,” Integra sighed, zipping her bag. “Seras, I must go purchase plane tickets for myself and Alucard. Would you please call Sir Gregory? I’ll need to speak with him.”

“Why Sir. Gregory?” Seras and Pip asked in unison.

Integra just smiled. “Because, he will agree to help me.”