#tom+chee

[kooldewd123]

honestly the biggest boon that the final animorphs arc has is that the lack of secrecy and shift to more open warfare really lets the supporting cast shine. toby and eva are super fresh and interesting additions to the war council, the rest of the parents (especially naomi) have a fun dynamic both amongst themselves and with the actual team, james is just such a super solid guy that it's hard not to root for him, the existence of the auxiliary animorphs (plus their allies in the national guard and the mountain taxxons) enhances the wargame feel of the finale by giving the team more breadth of strategies, and tom finally gets to evolve from a fairly straightforward roadblock into a proper villain with his own plans and motivations. plus, erek is as solid a character as ever once he finally shows up, but the notable absence of him and the rest of the chee throughout the majority of the final conflict after having spent the rest of the series as the animorphs' closest allies dangles this giant sense of helplessness over everything that you can just feel every time the team convenes. really my only complaint is that i wish the yeerk peace movement had a more visible role, although i get why it would be difficult to narratively fit them in.

[thollandsgirl2013]

Hi there, have you had a good day/night? I have this idea for a Tom Holland x fem wife reader, Tom steps into the house, tired from work, but immediately his eyes soften when he spots Y/N asleep on the couch, her bump slightly exposed as she’s sprawled comfortably. He smiles to himself as he kneels beside her, placing a hand on her pregnant bump. "I bet our little one is already dreaming too," he murmurs, running his hand gently over her belly.

Hi!! This was such a sweet request! I loved it! Thank you for requesting. Enjoy!

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𝐂𝐨𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐇𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐘𝐨𝐮

Parings → Tom Holland x Reader

Warnings → Fluff, Pregnancy, Domestic Bliss.

Summary → Tom comes home exhausted but finds peace in cuddling with his pregnant wife, sharing tender moments with her and their unborn baby.

Tom let out a long, exhausted sigh as he stepped through the front door, shutting it softly behind him. The day had been long—shoots running late, back-to-back interviews, and barely any time to sit down. But all of that melted away the second he stepped into the house, the familiar warmth of home wrapping around him like a comforting embrace.

He dropped his bag by the door and toed off his shoes, rolling his shoulders to release the tension coiled in them. His first instinct was to call out for you, but the quiet of the house made him pause. That’s when he saw you.

You were sprawled out on the couch, a blanket half-draped over you, your body turned slightly to the side. One hand rested beneath your cheek, the other just barely touching your belly. Your sweatshirt had ridden up slightly, exposing the gentle swell of your bump.

His heart clenched.

God, you were beautiful.

A slow smile tugged at his lips as he approached, his movements careful, as if afraid to wake you. He knelt down beside you, resting his forearms on the couch as he took in the peaceful rise and fall of your chest. His fingers reached out instinctively, grazing over the warm skin of your stomach.

"Hey there, darling," he whispered, his voice thick with fondness. His hand splayed across your belly, rubbing gentle circles as he leaned in closer. "I bet our little one is already dreaming too."

As if on cue, a tiny movement fluttered beneath his palm. His eyes widened, lips parting in awe.

"Oi—was that a kick?" He let out a breathless chuckle, his thumb stroking the spot where he felt the movement. "Are you saying hi to me, bub? You know, your dad had a long day. But this—" he let out a soft laugh, shaking his head, "this just made it a whole lot better."

You stirred then, a sleepy hum escaping your lips as your fingers twitched against your belly. Tom froze for a second, watching as your lashes fluttered before your eyes finally peeked open.

"Tom?" Your voice was groggy, thick with sleep, and it sent warmth coursing through his chest.

"Hey, love," he murmured, pressing a quick kiss to your exposed belly before looking up at you. "Didn’t mean to wake you."

You blinked at him, your lips curving into a soft, drowsy smile. "S’okay. What time is it?"

"Late." He glanced at his watch before shaking his head. "You should go back to sleep, darling."

You stretched slightly, wincing as you shifted. "Mm, couldn’t if I wanted to. Baby’s started to be a little active."

Tom’s grin widened as he rubbed his hand over your belly again. "Little one just gave me a proper kick to say hello."

Your brows lifted in amusement. "Yeah? She’s been at it all day. I think she missed you."

"Missed me?" He scoffed playfully, his eyes twinkling. "I was only gone a few hours!"

You huffed a laugh. "That’s a long time when you’re waiting on your favorite person."

His teasing smirk faltered, something softer, more tender, settling in its place. He reached up, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. "I missed you too, sweetheart."

Your hand slid over his, pressing his palm against your cheek as you nuzzled into his touch. "Was it a rough day?"

Tom sighed, his thumb grazing over your cheekbone. "Busy. Just... long. I kept thinking about coming home, though."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah." He leaned forward, resting his forehead against yours. "Thinking about you. About this little one." His other hand resumed tracing idle patterns on your belly. "Kept me going."

Your heart swelled at his words, and you turned your head slightly to press a kiss to his palm. "You’re here now."

"I am," he murmured, then pulled back with a grin. "And I come bearing gifts."

Your brows shot up. "Gifts?"

He reached into his hoodie pocket and pulled out a small, paper-wrapped package. "Picked up those chocolate bars you were craving."

Your eyes lit up instantly. "Tom!"

He laughed as you sat up, excitement overriding your grogginess. "Knew that’d wake you up."

"You’re the best husband ever," you declared, unwrapping the package with eager fingers.

"That I am." He winked. "Now, move over. I wanna cuddle."

You scooted to make room, and Tom wasted no time climbing onto the couch, maneuvering himself so you were tucked perfectly against his chest. His arms wrapped around you, one hand resting protectively over your bump.

"Mm," you sighed, melting into him. "This is nice."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah," you whispered. "You, me, and our little peanut. Just like this."

Tom tightened his arms around you, pressing a lingering kiss to the top of your head. "Just like this," he echoed.

And for the first time all day, he felt truly at peace.

°:. *₊ ° . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ° .•

[bell-swamp-fitzjames]

Oops all Women! for Terror (2018) playlists

I'm still reeling from today's 2 Hickey playlists and in honor of that here are the ladies of the Terror! Plus Tuunbaq! <3 I really have been enjoying making each one of these ones & I didn't think I'd make a tuunbaq one but that one came together almost like a dream. I must thank all of those who have allowed me to bounce ideas off of them and generally for anyone who listens to the playlists or looks at the post. <3 I love this event so much, it truly is every Sunday a dream come true.

Silna [LINK]

ataataga by Riit || Immutaa by Beatrice Deer || Deeper Than Love by Colleen Green || Embody by Frankie Cosmos || Waniska by Kym Gouchie || OK Indicts by Leanne Betasamosake Simpson || Gravity by The Blasting Company || Easy by Thao & The Get Down Stay Down || Tuttukasik (Bonus Track) by Nive Nielsen & The Deer Children || Don't Touch by Norma Tanega || Someday We'll Linger In The Sun by Gaelynn Lea || Tuattiaq by Joey Ammaq & Terry Uyarak || Happy Phantom- 2015 Remaster by Tori Amos || Beautiful Mother by Dirty Projectors, Bjork || Ghosts in My Heart by Mariee Sioux || Breaking Down by Florence + The Machine || House of Spirits by The Veils || House of 1982 Built Like A Ship by Driftless Pony Club || Words That Stay by Tele Novella || Ghost of a Boy by Rae Spoon

Tuunbaq [Link]

Song For A Dying Planet by Joe Walsh || The Planets Op. 32 VII. Neptune, The Mystic by Gustav Holst || Last Morning Watch IV. by Marcus Fjellström || Uninhabitable Earth, Paragraph One by Dirty Projectors, David Longstreth, stargaze || Nekton by Cosmo Sheldrake || Nocturne for Bassoon and Marimba by Connor Chee, Jacqueline Wilson, Christopher Wilson || Pollution by Tom Lehrer || Winter Saltings by Laura Cannell || Polar Sirens by David Bickley and Tom Green || Coyote, My Little Brother by Pete Seeger || Buzz Run by Heloise Tunstall-Behrens & Auclair || Sea Organ by Wonderfulsound || Better by The Honeysticks, Ricky Montgomery || The Firebird Suite (1919 Version): The Firebird and its Dances- 2017 Remastered Version by Igor Stravinsky, Leonard Bernstein, New York Philharmonic Orchestra || Pohjanpalo- Polar Night by Tuuletar || Normalization Blues- demo by AJJ || Pandemonium by Silla and Rise || Wolf Quartet - Original Mix by Matt Berry || All Fell Down by Jason Steele || Birth of Liquid Pleades by Tangerine Dream

Lady Jane Franklin [LINK]

Girls Just Want To Have Fun by Cyndi Lauper || Water Me Down by Vagabon || Queen of the Night Aria (Der Holle Rache) by Mozart || 3 O'Clock Things by AJR || Just LIke Jesse James by Cher || Kokomo by The Beach Boys || End of the Party by The English Beat || Leather and Lace- 2016 Remaster by Stevie Nicks, Don Henley || Don't Stop Me Now by Queen || Honky Cat- Remastered 2017 by Elton John || I Feel So Good by Jukebox the Ghost || Keep on Loving You by REO Speedwagon || Hole In My Pocket by Sheryl Crow || Anything You Can Do by Bernadette Peters, Tom Wopat || Night Waltz by Terry Trotter || Dancing in The Moonlight by King Harvest || Turn The Light by Karen 0, Danger Mouse || Everything's Coming Up Roses- Remastered Version by Linda Kirk || Anything Goes by Patti LuPone || I Still Believe by Tim Cappello

Sophia Cracroft [LINK]

Being In Love by Wet Leg || Sophisticated Girl by The Pezheads || Only You Know by Dion || Manhattan by Cat Power || You and I by Caribou || Hunter by Becca Mancari || Strawberry Jam by FIZZ || Dog Days Are Over by Florence + The Machine || You Shadow by Sharon Van Etten || Everything Now by Arcade Fire || Slip Away by Perfume Genius || Big Time Nothing by St. Vincent || Kyoto by Phoebe Bridgers || Ich küss dich tot by Schnipo Schranke || Burn Your Life Down by Tegan and Sara || Angel! Wild! Superstar! by Ha Vay || Lily by Mamiko Suzuki, Rachel || Strawberries by Asobi Seksu || Your Dog by Soccer Mommy || Deep Sea by Snail Mail

[imaginesforeveryone]

The Big Fight (Part 2)

Pairing: Bonnie Gold x Y/N Warning: Smut, fluff, swearing Summary: It was the day after your found out your brother had been killed, and Bonnie tried to make you feel better in a special way. 

It was the day after your brother had died, and Bonnie stayed with you the entire time. He woke up in the middle of the night when you woke up crying and you couldn’t be more grateful for him because he did that for you, even thought you barely knew each other. You woke up finally in the morning around 10 am. You felt as if you slept on something hard. You opened your eyes to see a naked chest under your head. Knowing it was Bonnie, you sat up slowly seeing him sleeping soundly. You turned in the bed and put your feet on the cold ground, trying to be as quiet as you could be not to wake him knowing he was up very late with you. You stood up and adjusted you’d night gown as your crossed the room to go into the bathroom. 

“Hey, you okay?” You heard and groggy Bonnie behind you. You turned to see him sitting up in your bed rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. 

“Yeah, yeah I’m fine. Go back to sleep. You were up late.” You told him. 

“No, I’m okay I got plenty of sleep.” He said getting out of your bed only wearing his pants. 

“You were sweating last night so I took my shirt off to make you more comfortable.” He said looking down at his body. 

“Thank you.” You said to him with a small smile.

“Well go ahead and get ready I have something planned for us today.” He said grabbing his shirt and putting it on. 

“Bonnie, I’m really not in the mood for anything, besides laying in my bed.” You told him. 

“Come on, love. It’s nothing big, just trust me. Let me help you.” He said closing the gap between the two of you. 

“Fine.” You said rolling your eyes and going to your closet to get clothes. You grabbed your favorite cozy button down, along with a cozy pair of pants. You went to the bathroom, and changed. 

“This good enough?” You asked Bonnie walking out in the attire you really didn’t try with. 

“Perfect.” He said with a smile. He grabbed your jacket off the back of your door and held it open to help it onto you. You walked to him and put your hands in either arm holes. 

“Alright, let’s go.” He said taking your hand and leading you out your bedroom door then to the front door. 

“Where are you two going?” You heard Polly say from behind you, sitting at the table with Tommy. 

“I’m taking her out to hopefully Chee her up a bit, Miss. Grey.” Bonnie said turning around. 

“You got a gun, son?” Tommy asked standing and walking closer to you two. 

“Yes, Mr. Shelby. She will be safe. I promise you that.” He said. 

“Good, watch for Italians.” He said. 

“Tom, I’m also a Shelby, Remember that.” You said before walking out if the house. Bonnie followed behind you, he walked passed you to open the door to the car for you and then went around the get into the driver seats. He started the car and drove away. 

“Bonnie, Where are we going?” You asked about 20 minutes into your drive. You were now in the fields, just trees and fields all around you. 

“We are almost there. Just hang on a bit longer.” He told you with a smile. You rolled your eyes and looked back out the window, taking in the view of just calmness. Way different then small heath, and London. All of sudden you turned off of the road you have been on for what felt like hours. 

“We are here.” He said with a smile on his face as he parked on the dirt road. You looked out the window and saw a carriage with, a horse. Something you missed from your childhood. You smiled at Bonnie and jumped out of the car so fast. 

“You did this? For me?” You asked rounding the car to look at him .

“Of course I know how gypsies are, and I know what helps them. You need to travel. It’ll help you.” You smiled jumping into his arms and hugging his so tight. After a moment of that, you jumped down. 

“Thank you.” You said smiling up at him. 

“Anytime, love.” He said with a smile. 

“Well should we go?” He asked as you just stood there. You just smiled and ran to the carriage and the horse caught your eye. Beautiful black horse, huge hooves and beautiful hair. You went over and pet it down its back. 

“It’s Tommy’s. He let me take her today.” Bonnie said walking up to you. Well, now you feel like an asshole the way you talked to him before you left. You’re brother actually cared how you were feeling. You two got into the carriage, Bonnie took the reins and you two were off. 

“So where are we going?” You asked looking over at him 

“Its a surprise.” He said with a little giggle at the end. You rolled your eyes and averted your eyes back to the forrest that you rode through. Taking in the beautiful scenery, and remember back to when you were a kid, your brothers all beside you, in the carriage. Before you knew it, the bouncing of the carriage, and the clacking of the horses hooves, soothed you to sleep. About 20 minutes later you felt the carriage come to a halt waking you from your nap. You were leaning up against Bonnie as you awake. 

“Sorry, I don’t know how I fell asleep.” You told him sitting up and stretching. 

“Its no problem. It would put me to sleep to if I hadn’t been on the road as long as you have been.” He said setting the reins down. You looked around and you were in a big field, that had a river running through it. You were posted up right in front of the river. You heard the water splashing up against the walls of the river and the current quickly moving. 

“Gosh, did I miss this.” You said getting out of the carriage and breathing deeply the open, clean air. 

“It looks good on you.” He said looking over at you as you went to pet the horse that pulled you two to the beautiful destination. 

“What does?” You said smiling but not taking your eyes away from the beautiful beast in front of you. 

“This destination. The traveling. The calmness it brings you.” Bonnie said walking up behind you and petting the main of the horse. You smiled as your turned around to look at him. 

“Well, it’s because of you I’m able to do this today.” You said smiling up at him not much space between the two of you.

“Well, I like you y/n. I don like you seeing upset, and I know as a gypsy that hasn’t been on the road in a long time, that could help me through hard times.” He said placing this had on your cheek and rubbing it softly with his touch hands. You closed your eyes relaxing into his hand. 

“Thank you, Bonnie.” You said opening your eyes again slowly, even closer to him than before. 

“Anytime, anywhere, love.” He said before he placed a kiss on your lips. As he started to pull away, you wrapped your arms around his neck and pulling him into the kiss again, deepening it. As panting started between the two of you trying to gasp for air between kisses. He took your legs and wrapped them around him and began carrying you. He set you on the opening of the back of the carriage and not detaching his lips from yours. You pulled his jacket off of him and threw it on the ground behind him along with his hat. You moved back further into the carriage to allow him to get in. He hoped up into it, and crawled over to you. 

“You sure you want to do this?” Bonnie asked inches from your face. 

“I’m very, very sure.” You said with a smile. He smiled back at you and quickly helped you out of your jacket. You grabbed ahold of his suspenders of took them off his shoulders and ripped the buttons off his loose white button down exposing his torso to the cool air that blew from the outside into the back of the carriage. Bruises, and cuts, peppered his skin from the fight the day before. Pushing you out of your thoughts, he attached his lips to yours once again and fell back into the pile of pillow and blankets. He ran his hands up your shirt causing goosebumps to form all over your body in ecstasy, not of being cold. You hadn’t been touched in you rodent even know how long. But, Bonnie. Bonnie, made you feel different then just a fuck like you have only ever had. 

As he ran his hand up your torso he removed your shirt and threw it to your side exposing your naked chest to him. He sat up on his knees between your legs to take you in. You smiled at him, and rolled your eyes, sitting up and unbuttoning his pants and pulled them down along with his boxers as far as they could go. After that, you did the same for yourself, but taking them off all the way. Now laid, completely naked and exposed to Bonnie. 

“Fuck, you’re beautiful , Love” He said holding each side of your hips and squeezing. 

“Yeah? Then show me how beautiful I am. Ey?” You said smiling up at him. He grinned down at you and quickly attached his lips to your hard nipples, causing a soft moan to escape from between your lips. You ran your hands through his thick curly hair. After a few moments of him attacking your breasts with his amazing mouth you pulled his lips back yours and attacked his tongue with yours. 

“Fuck me, Bonnie.” You told him as you held eye contact with him. 

“Yes ma’am.” He said before grabbing his cock between the two of your and lining his self up with your entrance. Looking back up at you for confirmation. You just shook your head at him with a smile. As you did so, he slowly slid into you causing a loud groan to exit the both of you. 

“Fuck, Bonnie.” You groaned out lowly. 

“Yeah, you like that love?” He asked looking into your eyes and keeping a slow pace. 

“Fuck yes.” You said arching your chest up to him and he attached himself too your buds. 

“Bonnie. Fuck me harder.” You groaned out as your wrapped your arms around his neck and putting your fingers through the hair on the back of his head. 

“Yeah? You want that love?” He said looking at you. 

“Yes, please Bonnie. Please.” You cried out. As you said he got up on his knees and grabbed ahold of your hips to keep himself steady and to pull you hard into him. He began to pump faster, and faster causing you to grab ahold of his forearms and squeezing. 

“Fuck ‘El, Bonnie. I’m going to cum.” You yelled out feeling a knot form in your stomach. As you spoke those words, Bonnie lifted you up, he still in his knees, his cock not leaving the inside of you, you planted your feet on either side of him now in a squatting position. He began again pouring up into him. You wrapped your arms around his neck, helping you stay upright, but he also had a hand planted right between your shoulder blades, and the other hold one of your ass cheeks. 

“Go ahead love. Cum.” He whispered into your ear and softly kissing your neck and pouring even harder into you. At a lose of words, and breathe you mouth just hung open as your pussy pulsated around his cock. 

“Fuck love. I don’t think I can hold on any longer either with the pussy of yours.” He said. With that you pushed him back so he was on his back, and his head just on the edge of the door to exit the carriage. You sunk deeper onto him now and began rolling your hips on him. 

“Go head, Love. Cum.” You told him. With that he grabbed ahold of your hips and pounded up into you very hard causing another wave to overcome your body. 

“Fuck. I love that cock Bonnie. Your going to make me cum again.” You cried out. 

“Cum with me love.” He said licking his finger and rubbing on your clit causing electricity to pulsate through your body and your walls pulsate around him. 

“Yes, love. Yes. Cum inside of me.” You cried out and with that he did as you did along with him. 

“Fuck.” You said as you fell back onto the pillows and blankets. Feeling Bonnie, climb next to you, and laid down now with his pants pulled back up. He pulled you into him and covered you with a blanket. You laid your head on his chest and closed your eyes. 

“Thank you.” You said lowly. 

“For what Love?” He asked running his fingers up and down your arm. 

“Helping me feel better. Doing all this. Never have had anyone go through this much to just help me feel better.” You said still with your eyes closed. 

“Anytime. Anywhere.” He said kissing the top of your head. Wit that you slowly drifted to sleep.

[halogenwarrior]

I posted this as a reply to someone else's post but I want to make it its own post because the original didn't get any likes or reflags, maybe because it didn't show up in the tags.

My take on the hate for Cassie Animorphs that you see a lot is that the perception is that Cassie makes decisions that are questionable or flawed but always turns out to be right in the end because of author fiat/favoritism, which I don't think is accurate when you analyze things deeply though I can see why people say so.

The thing is, how it usually works when the Animorphs are having an argument about morality is that the "failure mode" (the consequences of the action if it doesn't work out) of Cassie's suggestion or decision is that the war is completely lost and all of humanity is enslaved or killed by the Andalites, while the "success mode" is that a small amount of beings are saved and/or there will be a long-term ripple effect that leads to benefits for a lot of beings, both in terms of making the war more winnable and benefits that extent outside the war entirely. For example, letting Tom have the blue box would have led to the loss of the war if the gamble didn't pay off, and does have negative consequences for the war that could have easily led to them losing, but its positive impact is in both Yeerk and Taxxon defectors helping the Animorphs in the war and in, from a "humanitarian" perspective, Yeerks and Taxxons being offered a better choice besides war and conquest or the personal consequences of having to live in their standard bodies.

Meanwhile the "failure mode" of following the plan of someone like Marco can also sometimes be that the Animorphs will just lose the war, or sometimes that they will be back where they started (which is still a difficult and hopeless position with the Yeerks' greater numbers and more advanced technology), while the "success mode" is that they get that much closer to winning the war, such that if they continually forego opportunities like this they will have no chances of winning at all.

And for this reason, it is true that generally, when the others decide to go with Cassie's decision despite those risks, or Cassie acts on her beliefs anyway without the permission of the others, she turns out to be right and they don't all get killed or become Controllers. The plot armor and narrative conventions that they can't have the main characters just lose there, which is usually what will happen if they listen to Cassie and she is wrong. BUT the narrative shows the balance between Cassie's perspective and someone like Marco's both having their places in a different way; by showing the situations where the others don't go through with Cassie's plan, and Cassie is unable or unwilling to do her own thing or sabotage them. Such as blowing up the Yeerk pool in #52, which she explicitly opposes morally. But the others don't agree with Cassie and do it anyway, and it works, and it's clear they would have just lost the war there if they had sided with Cassie. Due to the restraints of the narrative, Cassie being wrong is usually indicated not by the others listening to Cassie or failing to stop her from taking action and her failing, but of them doing the opposite of what Cassie wants and succeeding. It's not as flashy and obvious, the other Animorphs don't sit there and say "wow we are so glad we didn't listen to Cassie or we would all be dead and humanity would be enslaved, isn't she dumb", but it's clear from the consequences of the narrative that she was wrong in that case.

The only exception where they were able to illustrate Cassie being wrong in the opposite way, where they take her side and do what Cassie wants and it's wrong, is with regards to throwing away the device to reprogram the Chee (initially what Cassie wanted and the others did not). This leads to consequences in the last book where it forces Jake to get the Chee's participation by threats and force instead, leading directly to Rachel and Tom's death and the escape of Tom's ship. And this comes down to the consequences happening in the last book of the series, meaning that while it doesn't lose them the war the narrative isn't as restricted to keeping all the main characters alive that it can't demonstrate permanent consequences to following Cassie's idea. But in other cases, Cassie isn't always right but her being wrong is demonstrated by the implications of what would have happened if they listened to her rather than what did happen when they did.

Overall I think her character is treated in a pretty balanced way between her perspective being right and wrong, although the narrative framing (out of necessity due to having to write within the constraints of not having the main characters lose and be killed/enslaved) drawing more attention to the times when she is right makes it look otherwise!

[thejakeformerlyknownasprince]

What is being referenced with the Cassie hologram in that cut Eleutherophobia bit you linked earlier? I don't recall any "onscreen" use of the Chee duplicating anyone but Marco+Peter

Oh yeah, that's Erek's role in the endgame. Jake is technically pulling a triple-cross (quadruple cross?) on Visser Formerly-Three in the final battle, using Visser "Seventeen" (the yeerk in Tom). Visser Seventeen thinks the plan is:

V17 doesn't tell V1 the andalite navy is approaching Earth, or that James's big damn attack on the Pool ship is a ruse.

V17 "captures" an Animorph, and brings her on board the Pool ship. In reality he's bringing all 6 Animorphs with him, sneaking them past security.

The Animorphs plan to demorph on the Pool ship and take it from V1. Meanwhile V17 takes the Blade ship, waits for the andalite attack, and fucks off amidst the chaos to go conquer some other planet.

However, Jake's version of the plan accounts for V17 being untrustworthy, and goes more like:

The "captured" Animorph isn't Cassie; it's Erek. Cassie thus isn't in danger from V17. Marco and Ax really are riding "Cassie" through security, but Rachel’s in Tom's hair.

When V17 inevitably announces to V1 that all 6 Animorphs are with "Cassie," Erek pretends to be eaten by taxxon. Tobias makes sure he's the closest "taxxon" on hand when V1 gives the order, to sell the ruse.

The 5 Animorphs on the Pool ship sneak away, remorph in a back room, and take the Pool ship. Rachel rides to the Blade ship on Tom, and makes sure V17 can't get away with it.

Of course there are even more moving pieces than that - James and General Doubledday on the ground, the Hamees hidden on the Pool ship, the hosts they loop into the fight, the taxxon rebels, the way they get Erek's help - but that's why Tom knows the Animorphs can do something hinky with hologram tech.

[companion-showdown]

Showdown 2k24: Round 2

Everyone has been split into groups of 16 roughly by how well known they are and seeded within those groups to determin matches. There will be 16 polls posted every day (so two of the groups) except Friday. At the end of the round groups will be paired up and re-seeded ready for next time

the submission form for contestant propaganda is still open, you can find it here.

ROUND 1

Day 4

Mary Shelley vs Ikalla

Claudia Winkleman vs Cinder

Hector vs Sibling Different

Ruth Leonidas vs Susan Who

Alan Turing vs Peter Summerfield

John Lennon vs Dorothy (The Wonderful Doctor of Oz)

Tom Campbell vs Barusa

Peter Cushing vs Alison Cheney

Brian the Ood vs Penelope Gate

Hattie Munroe vs Gabby Gonzalez

Splinx vs Grayla

V.M.McCrimmon vs Patience

Andy Davidson vs Dormouse

The Squire vs Weeping Angel (Origins)

Cindy Wu vs Guinevere Winchester

Child Master (The Then and the Now) vs Koschei

previous and future days under the cut

Day 1

Jamie McCrimmon vs Sergeant Benton WINNER: Jamie McCrimmon

Vicki Pallister vs Zoe Heriot WINNER: Zoe Heriot

Barbara Wright vs Steven Taylor WINNER: Barbara Wright

Victoria Waterfield vs Sarah-Jane Smith WINNER: Sarah-Jane Smith

Jo Grant vs The Brigadier WINNER: Jo Grant

Ian Chesterton vs Leela WINNER: Leela

Liz Shaw vs Polly Wright WINNER: Liz Shaw

Dodo Chaplet vs Susan Foreman WINNER: Susan Foreman

Charley Pollard vs Mark Seven WINNER: Charley Pollard

Cass Fermazzi vs Molly O'Sullivan WINNER: Molly O'Sullivan

Oliver Harper vs Liv Chenka WINNER: Liv Chenka

C'rizz vs Lucie Miller WINNER: Lucie Miller

Iris Wildthyme vs Anya Kingdom WINNER: Iris Wildthyme

Erimem vs Bliss WINNER: Bliss

Hex Schofield vs Helen Sinclair WINNER: Helen Sinclair

Tania Bell vs Evelyn Smythe WINNER: Evelyn Smythe

Day 2

Bill Potts vs Nardole WINNER: Bill Potts

The TARDIS vs River Song WINNER: The TARDIS

Wilfred Mott vs Jack Harkness WINNER: Wilfred Mott

Amy Pond vs Martha Jones WINNER: Martha Jones

Clara Oswald vs Rory Williams WINNER: Clara Oswald

Ruby Sunday vs Rose Noble WINNER: Rose Noble

Kate Stewart vs Canton Everette Deleware III WINNER: Kate Stewart

Missy vs Donna Noble WINNER: Donna Noble

Bernice Summerfield vs Marie (Alien Bodies) WINNER: Bernice Summerfield

Chris Cwej vs Business Woman WINNER: Chris Cwej

Roz Forrester vs The Mortimer family WINNER: Roz Forrester

Rosie Taylor vs Compassion WINNER: Compassion

Fitz Kreiner vs Serena WINNER: Fitz Kreiner

Badger vs Wolsey WINNER: Wolsey

Sam Jones vs Claudia Marwood WINNER: Sam Jones

Homunculette vs Anji Kapoor WINNER: Anji Kapoor

Day 3

Ace McShane vs Mags WINNER: Ace McShane

Romana I vs Nyssa WINNER: Nyssa

Romana II vs Ryan Sinclair WINNER: Romana II

Graham O'Brien vs Mel Bush WINNER: Mel Bush

Vislor Turlough vs K9 WINNER: K9

Chang Lee vs Tegan Jovanka WINNER: Tegan Jovanka

Inston-Vee Vinder vs Grace Holloway WINNER: Inston-Vee Vinder

Peri Brown vs Yasmin Khan WINNER: Yasmin Khan

Frobisher vs ARC WINNER: Frobisher

Duh vs Josie Day WINNER: Josie Day

Ssard vs Chantir WINNER: Ssard

Gus Goodman vs Izzy Sinclair WINNER: Izzy Sinclair

Rose-the-cat vs Abslom Daak WINNER: Rose-the-cat

Majenta Pryce vs Maxwell Edison WINNER: Majenta Pryce

Kroton vs Ly-Chee the Wise WINNER: Kroton

Fey Truscott-Sade vs Destrii WINNER: Destrii

[bongaboi]

Brisbane Lions: 2024 AFL Premiers

THESE will forever be Brisbane's kings of the pride.

After last year's heartbreak, a 0-3 start to the season, five season-ending knee reconstructions, missing out on the top four, three finals on the road, a semi-final win for the ages and storylines everywhere you looked, Brisbane is the premier for 2024 after a Toyota AFL Grand Final dismantling of Sydney.

In the redemption cup – the Lions looking to go one better than their four-point loss to Collingwood and Sydney hoping to overturn its disastrous 2022 decider – it was Chris Fagan's men who saluted by 60 points in an MCG masterclass in front of 100,013 fans.

The 18.12 (120) to 9.6 (60) win delivered the Lions their first flag since 2003 and 12th through its Fitzroy history as Fagan lifted the cup in his eighth season at the helm.

This was a rough welcome to the jungle for the Swans – everywhere Sydney turned, Brisbane was there. Every way the Swans looked, the Lions had them covered.

It would have been a terrible case of deja vu for the Swans, with the club now losing its past four Grand Finals since 2012. Three of them have been thrashings.

Where to start with Brisbane's band of heroes? It was a Lions' share: Lachie Neale, carrying an ankle injury, was sensational as he saluted with a flag in his third Grand Final attempt with 34 disposals and nine clearances.

Kai Lohmann lit the fuse early and finished with four and Callum Ah Chee kept the flame alive throughout with four majors. Will Ashcroft, having missed last year's decider with his knee injury, was superb and showed again he is a champion in the making with 30 disposals and a goal. Joe Daniher is considering retirement but showed he is at the top of his game, with only inaccuracy potentially costing him a Norm Smith Medal.

But where the Lions were hot, Sydney brought the cold. It was difficult to find a winner for the Swans, who had their star-studded midfield nullified, their forward line shut down and their back half picked apart.

Katy Perry started the day with a roar, but the Lions added a mighty to it. Sydney struck first with the opening two goals, the first from Will Hayward and the second a superb snap from Tom Papley. But that mini lead didn't quite sum up the contest after the Lions' early inaccuracy.

Lohmann quickly changed that. The eye-catching Lion kicked their first, and then their second a minute later on his left foot to give Brisbane the energy it needed, his tongue-out celebration a spirit boost to match his side's ascendancy.

They continued to control the play with their uncontested marking game as Hugh McCluggage cruised into a third goal, with the gun midfielder tallying nine opening-quarter disposals.

James Rowbottom's long set shot was a steadier for the Swans, who were preferring their shorter forward targets than their key position options, but Charlie Cameron's snap from the boundary – and subsequent bow to the crowd – restored Brisbane's eight-point lead at the first change.

Brisbane's premiership was won in an exhilarating second quarter. The Lions kicked seven goals to one for the term and they came from everywhere as the Swans, for the second time in three years, were pounded.

Lohmann kicked his third from the pocket, Cameron spotted Daniher cleverly for another, Ah Chee's brilliant finals series continued with two for the term, Jarrod Berry capitalised on Nick Blakey's turnover to slot a long goal and Eric Hipwood kicked one of the great Grand Final goals from the boundary line after dodging Dane Rampe, slotting the goal and reprising three-time Lions premiership star Jason Akermanis' pseudo shocked celebration afterwards.

When Logan Morris booted their 11th, the Lions had leapt to a 46-point lead for half-time as their youth, speed and hardened run into the flag decider proved beneficial.

Where the Lions' big names and lesser lights all stood up – from first-year player Morris to champion two-time Brownlow medallist Neale – Sydney couldn't find a winner as its midfield was battered, its defence under siege and forward line ineffective.

Party time started early as Neale continued to dominate the midfield battle in the third quarter, with Daniher also showing up the Swans defence. If it is to be Daniher's last game of an enigmatic career – the 30-year-old is weighing his future – then he went out on a high, kicking 2.4 but proving pivotal to the Lions.

His forward presence, as well as important around-the-ground ruck efforts, helped a fleet of smaller Lions capitalise time after time.

Lions fans spent most of the second half rejoicing, as more highlights came their way: the Cam Rayner hanger, Ah Chee enjoying a day out, one last Lohmann flying grab and, of course, a Daniher left-foot snap to close things out. The pride of Brisbane town – and beyond.

SYDNEY 3.1 4.3 5.4 9.6 (60) BRISBANE 4.3 11.7 16.11 18.12 (120)

GOALS Sydney: Parker 3, Warner, Rowbottom, Papley, Heeney, Hayward, Fox Brisbane: Lohmann 4, Ah Chee 4, Morris 2, Daniher 2, Rayner, McCluggage, Hipwood, Cameron, Berry, Ashcroft

INJURIES Sydney: McDonald (ankle) Brisbane: Nil

SUBSTITUTES Sydney: Braeden Campbell (replaced Logan McDonald in the third quarter) Brisbane: Conor McKenna (replaced Logan Morris in the final quarter)

Crowd: 100,013 at the MCG

[killappeal]

What are some of your favorite books?? I want to branch out and I trust your judgement

Wow, first of all thank you for trusting me! This is a hard question for me because I'm not much of a favorites person, especially with things aren't easily revisited, and I don't do a good job of keeping track of the books I read. That being said, my go-to get-to-know-me favorite books are The Bonfire of the Vanities* by Tom Wolfe, which is about New York City in the 1980s, and The Haunting of Hill House.

Off the top of my head, some other books that have stuck with me over the years are:

Omon Ra and Chapayev and the Void/Buddha's Little Finger (Victor Pelevin)

Embassytown (China Miéville)

If on a Winter's Night a Traveler (Italo Calvino)

Mapping the Interior (Stephen Graham Jones)

Ghost Wall (Sarah Moss)

My Dark Vanessa (Kate Elizabeth Russell)

Dare Me (Megan Abbott)

Less than Zero** (Bret Easton Ellis)

White Noise*** (Don DeLillo)

Miss Lonelyhearts (Nathanael West)

A Time to be Born (Dawn Powell)

The Three-Body Problem (Cixin Liu)

The Winter Prince (Elizabeth E. Wein)****

The Man in the High Castle (Phillip K. Dick)

Blood Meridian (Cormac McCarthy)

I'm also currently reading Edinburgh by Alexander Chee and really liking it.

*also has a bad movie adaptation

**has a bad movie adaptation that's actually a pretty good watch because it has a great soundtrack and James Spader

***has a movie adaptation that I haven't seen but have heard from people I trust is actually pretty good

****THEE MOST INSANE book I've ever checked out of the children's section of a library--make sure to read the very R-rated prequel too if you like it (I've actually been meaning to upload that to a drive or something...)

[heldflesh]

TALES OF SABRY — FAIRUZ IBRAHIM.

──  (  tamino.  genderqueer,  he / they.  )  recently  seen  trapezing  across  a  lone  stage,  spotlights  dancing  off  beaded  sweat  –  audience  a  crowd  of  one,  half - asleep  or  otherwise  dead,  spirit  rising  from  still  body  in  a  chant;  encore,  encore!  bravo!  at  verve:  enter  FAIRUZ  IBRAHIM  SABRY.  twenty  six  years  old  &  a  scorpio,  usually  observed  in  tits  out;  slivers  of  chainmail  barely  concealing  loving  shark - bites  alongside  rib,  fishnet  your  only  true,  loyal  companion  –  starfish  spurs  against  heeled  boots;  aquamarine  could  never  ;  fairuz  is  a  devotion  visitor  known  within  their  circle  as  MADCAP  +  GRANDIOSE,  a  perpetual  hum  of  knife  prty  by  deftones  on  salted  mouth.  something  of  the  HUBRISTIC  +  CAVALIER  follows,  regardless  …  something  to  do  with  an  incessant  need  to  entertain  and  please,  for  oneself  and  for  others,  one  complete  theatrical  act  ,  perhaps  ?  strange,  what  a  SIREN  can  get  up  to.  they’ve  been  heard  waxing  lyrical  about  a  dream  they  had  recently,  a  strange  tale  of  lightning  against  stark  red  sea;  no  tell  of  morning  from  night  –  only  fools  dare  to  cross  the  threshold;  scaled  body  wrapped  around  splintering  wood,  ichor  flowing  from  lip  and  chest  –  harpoon  a  stake  upon  self  .  pay  no  mind  to  fanciful  star  -  gazing,  though:  rather,  mind  the  tangible.  focus  on  defense  being  a  performance  in  itself,  accusatory  points  towards  a  faceless  jury  and  judge  in  the  checkout  line  of  a  mini  mart  –  i'm  innocent,  your  honor!  hear  my  pleas,  hark  my  –  cue  one  dragged  away  by  smoothed  heels,  threats  brimming  lips  /  insatiable  hunger  and  the  habit  of  playing  with  ones  food  –  thoughts  bubbling  mid - air,  tom  and  jerry  sequence  of  cat  and  mouse,  mallet  to  head  –  cuckoos  circling;  almost  as  satisfying  as  the  kill  /  and  bone  an  accessory  –  so  sustainable  chic!  –  fish  spine  piercing  cartilage,  ribs  lining  lobe  –  cuffs  of  mysterious  vertebrae,  drilled  and  filed  and  –  .

... mentioning themes of IMPLIED MAN - EATING, SLIGHT BODY HORROR, INJURY, DEATH, and RESURRECTION. proceed with care.

with palms held out.

full name — fairuz ibrahim sabry.

nickname(s) — ruse, in a poor attempt to give himself a nickname ( did not stick ); pretty boy; puck ( perked up chee– ); narcissus, after method acting too hard– austin butler who?; others yet to be seen.

date of birth & age — october 29th, 19xx, physically twenty6.

gender / pronouns — genderqueer; he / him & they / them preferred, all welcomed.

sexuality — bisexual.

typing — siren, slut of the sea ( affectionate ).

occupation — unfortunate thespian; one man act; professional ( ? ) clown; cashier at oracle & oddysey.

astrology — scorpio sun, aries moon, leo ascending.

interests — cheap thrills. spotlight - induced sweat. anything that gleams or sheens, skin included. red meat & red wine & red lipstick in a very real, very french way. fishnet for more reasons than none. garnering attention. burlesque clowns. being a burlesque clown. six seas, don't bring up the seventh.

aversions — "deep" feelings. "deep" conversations. forced intellectualism, you can be pretentious and stupid! skeptics & nonbelievers. taxes. tax collectors. attention seekers, there can only be one ( it's them ).

next in queue — girls on film, mindless self indulgence; pain, boy harsher; slow, depeche mode; talking in your sleep, the romantics.

notable features — what's not to notice? knife - like teeth and an old scar where they nip into bottom lip every too - wide grin & lazy clown make - up; a triangle beneath every eye ( only two, for now ).

general disposition — too grand and generally delusional, but they wear it very well.

last known location — lifting himself back onto the rocks in a siren - dwelled cave like a baywatch wannabe, only to slip upon the surface and back into the water. hasn't emerged since out of hurt ego and deeply hitting embarrassment.

scrying mirror & kindred — mercutio ( romeo & juliet ), dorian gray ( the picture of dorian gray ), oberyn martell ( game of thrones ), theodore laurence ( little women ), emma woodhouse ( emma ).

what lurks in the past...

time is trivial beneath the ocean's surface; light no longer refracting, only vast blue encasing the young. first memory - first consciousness, an array of bubbles; thrashing and struggling, god mother's serpentine body wrapping around and around until all is still once more, until only bone is left to drift further down the depths.

their behavior is pack - like, school of sirens circling coasts like sharks, symbiotic and one; homes made of shipwrecks and reefs, underground caves and trenches, close to docks and ports and harbors, convenience - store runs for sailors and captains. it's rare that they break surface, walk among humans - entertainment best between selves and their food; happy meals best accompanied by toys.

fairuz is both alike and unalike them; a penchant for the finer, rawer things in life, metallic tang behind each sharp tooth, and a growing boredom, tree - like in their sternum. branching, rooting - blooming dissatisfaction with each coast they distance from. the sea felt stagnant, while every breach of ripple upon surface revealed new buildings - years meaningless to them, but everything to land dwellers.

curiosity, was all it was; curiosity all that killed them. separating from pack, intrigued by talks of a circus near - shore, a different sort of spectacle than drama between sister sirens ( they gave a mermaid's purse to you? but they gave one to me! you slu - ); fairuz became enthralled with the faeries who spun from silk, the witches who swallowed fire only to shoot fireworks from tongue - the ringleader whose smile pierced through every one of fairuz' hearts.

their visits upon land became more frequent, trailing the traveling troupe whenever able; need an incessant itch beneath their scales, a match against their ever - growing hunger. quick snacks became one, then two - doubling with each town or city swam across.

fairuz never heed the warnings of a red sky, human paranoia no toll upon their body; still broke surface, that fateful day, lightning serving them well - ship an oyster cracked wide, ready for taking. their hunger barely satiated when a whistle sung from behind; not a warning, but the sound of air tearing as a harpoon spit from its gun and ripped into their scaled flesh.

the sky was no longer red; no longer anything, the ocean's pressure luring them into their endless slumber; reminiscent of their youth, when they welcomed the sea's warm embrace like their own mother's. comfortable. warm. safe. do you wish to live, siren?

voice clear as day; like a whisper into their ear, soft and urging. you can live forever, if you please. if their consciousness was still awake - fairuz would've found the humor in being siren - called; instead, their spirit stirred inside them, hands pressed upon their former living shell. let us save you. let us free you. just say yes.

sirenkin, their family: the choice to leave was no one's but fairuz', one of their few regrets in life; visiting sirens of devo, do you know this fucker?

righteous fishermen with penchants for revenge: slow your rolls - fairuz' is just a little guy, a little fella! and they should be dead! right? ... right?

...comes to light in present...

five years resurrected, five years given to delphinium's traveling, theatrical circus troupe and one would've never guessed; a puzzle piece fitting just right against an entirely wrong picture, the epitome of a live, laugh, love sign hung crooked against a contemporary farmhouse kitchen wall - fairuz dazzles all. or pisses them off - either, or - all of the above; attention is attention, and fairuz craves it almost as much as they crave fle-

they awake the same everyday; a life - rattling exhale of breath, gasping and hoarse like the first time they reopened their eyes; almost comedic, hand trailing to the star - like scar upon their chest - a tale better left unsaid, in accordance to delphinium. they know best - better than fairuz, at least; knows what secrets are best kept, while fairuz spills open at any given moment, at any curious glance.

he's all emotion; nothing cool, nothing collected - only extravagant, demanding; eyes on them at all times. dramatics started at the blink of a single one of those eyes - constantly performing for an unknown audience, never caring if others are swept up by his current. takes good intentions and swallows them for his own benefit; you wouldn't trust a god, would you?

the circus settled in devotion just short of a few months ago; no signs of leaving yet - performances weekly, each and every weekend and occasionally wednesdays, if audience demands then who are they to gatekeep? fairuz lurks beneath the sea's rippling surface some days - sleeps behind the counter of oracle & oddsyey's other days; a siren needs a little spending money, after all; especially him, pockets usually barren and closets overflowing. otherwise can be found wherever there's a crowd.

traveling circus troupe [ menacing voice from behind, hey sis- ]: fairuz' found family. faeries and witches and humans and sirens and nymphs alike, all welcomed as long as they harness talent. don't ask why fairuz' is there; only delphinium knows.

a horde of angry lovers: a necessity in every town, devotion no different. fairuz is more wrong than right, would rather end up in a second grave than admit it.

...and carries into the future.

how long can a corpse walk for, before their magic runs out? before they've stolen all the energy left inside, until blood is shed once more - theirs and others, and others and theirs. prophecies tell of moon falling back into sea and never - rising once more, fallen on unwilling ears - fairuz' mostly, forever pig - headed, too busy gazing upon reflections.

how many enemies, can one make? scorned lovers of lovers, scorned friends betrayed for the slightest whim, abandoned on impulse. scorned family - sick of antics, of fairuz' thoughts that only revolve around himself.

fairuz never worries of the future. but perhaps they should.

prophecy - spewing nymphs: they heed not their warnings, demise be damned - you'd think fairuz would know better by now.

friends to enemies: a eventual happening, slow at first, but like all fire - the more it grows, the farther it spreads.

[444namesplus]

Aal Aam Aan Aar Aas Ala Ale Ali Alo Alu Ama Ame Ami Amo Amu Ana Ane Ani Ano Anu Ara Are Ari Aro Aru Asa Ase Asi Aso Asu Baa Bal Bam Ban Bar Bas Bee Bel Bem Ben Ber Bes Bii Bil Bim Bin Bir Bis Bol Bom Bon Boo Bor Bos Bul Bum Bun Bur Bus Buu Chaa Chal Cham Chan Char Chas Chee Chel Chem Chen Cher Ches Chii Chil Chim Chin Chir Chis Chol Chom Chon Choo Chor Chos Chul Chum Chun Chur Chus Chuu Daa Dal Dam Dan Dar Das Dee Del Dem Den Der Des Dii Dil Dim Din Dir Dis Dol Dom Don Doo Dor Dos Dul Dum Dun Dur Dus Duu Eel Eem Een Eer Ees Ela Ele Eli Elo Elu Ema Eme Emi Emo Emu Ena Ene Eni Eno Enu Era Ere Eri Ero Eru Esa Ese Esi Eso Esu Faa Fal Fam Fan Far Fas Fee Fel Fem Fen Fer Fes Fii Fil Fim Fin Fir Fis Fol Fom Fon Foo For Fos Ful Fum Fun Fur Fus Fuu Gaa Gal Gam Gan Gar Gas Gee Gel Gem Gen Ger Ges Gii Gil Gim Gin Gir Gis Gol Gom Gon Goo Gor Gos Gul Gum Gun Gur Gus Guu Iil Iim Iin Iir Iis Ila Ile Ili Ilo Ilu Ima Ime Imi Imo Imu Ina Ine Ini Ino Inu Ira Ire Iri Iro Iru Isa Ise Isi Iso Isu Kaa Kal Kam Kan Kar Kas Kee Kel Kem Ken Ker Kes Kii Kil Kim Kin Kir Kis Kol Kom Kon Koo Kor Kos Kul Kum Kun Kur Kus Kuu Ola Ole Oli Olo Olu Oma Ome Omi Omo Omu Ona One Oni Ono Onu Ool Oom Oon Oor Oos Ora Ore Ori Oro Oru Osa Ose Osi Oso Osu Paa Pal Pam Pan Par Pas Pee Pel Pem Pen Per Pes Pii Pil Pim Pin Pir Pis Pol Pom Pon Poo Por Pos Pul Pum Pun Pur Pus Puu Saa Sal Sam San Sar Sas See Sel Sem Sen Ser Ses Shaa Shal Sham Shan Shar Shas Shee Shel Shem Shen Sher Shes Shii Shil Shim Shin Shir Shis Shol Shom Shon Shoo Shor Shos Shul Shum Shun Shur Shus Shuu Sii Sil Sim Sin Sir Sis Sol Som Son Soo Sor Sos Sul Sum Sun Sur Sus Suu Taa Tal Tam Tan Tar Tas Tee Tel Tem Ten Ter Tes Thaa Thal Tham Than Thar Thas Thee Thel Them Then Ther Thes Thii Thil Thim Thin Thir This Thol Thom Thon Thoo Thor Thos Thul Thum Thun Thur Thus Thuu Tii Til Tim Tin Tir Tis Tol Tom Ton Too Tor Tos Tul Tum Tun Tur Tus Tuu Ula Ule Uli Ulo Ulu Uma Ume Umi Umo Umu Una Une Uni Uno Unu Ura Ure Uri Uro Uru Usa Use Usi Uso Usu Uul Uum Uun Uur Uus Vaa Val Vam Van Var Vas Vee Vel Vem Ven Ver Ves Vii Vil Vim Vin Vir Vis Vol Vom Von Voo Vor Vos Vul Vum Vun Vur Vus Vuu

[sshbpodcast]

Bottom Five Star Trek VOY Episodes

by Ames

Star Trek: Voyager gets a lot of flak for not always capitalizing on its unique circumstance, as a show about a cumulative journey meant to take a lot of time. Some of that is the episodic nature of the show: audiences needed to be able to tune in randomly and not feel as lost as the crew were. But some bad episodes just had no excuse. And you’ll see a lot of that in A Star to Steer Her By’s picks for worst episodes of the show. 

We’ll miss all our Delta Quadrant friends, enemies, and alien races, sure. We’ll miss the ship and the crew. But there’s also a lot that we won’t miss, as there were a good deal of missed opportunities, clunkers, and just plain offensive episodes along the way. Good riddance to those! Scroll on to see what we mean in our bottom five episodes of Voyager below, and/or listen to our coverage over on the podcast (series review starts at 1:29:20) with some audio-exclusive picks from guest star Liz! It’s finally time to self destruct this ship.

[images © CBS/Paramount]

“The Fight”: Ames I’m pretty clear on my stance on dream sequence episodes, but for those of you sitting in the back: I hate them. They’re contrived, they’re convenient, they’re too literal. Just ugh all around. Which is a shame because there’s something in this episode that could have been interesting for Chakotay to do for a change, but it got lost somewhere in boxing metaphors and some Native American spiritualism. Talk about a bad dream!

“Tattoo”: Chris Speaking of Native American spiritualism, this episode is just plain uncomfortable and it all comes down to the one line of dialogue that goes too far: “Forty five thousand years ago, on our first visit to your world, we met a small group of nomadic hunters. They had no spoken language, no culture, except the use of fire and stone weapons.” Oh writers, you done screwed up to imply that the only reason Native Americans have culture is because aliens. A-koo-chee-moh-no.

“Alice”: Caitlin Caitlin surprised us a couple times in her series picks by opting for episodes she hadn’t even included in her season-by-season lists! So welcome, “Alice,” to the bottoms list. The femme fatale ship was just too tropey and icky and really brought Tom’s character down a few pegs. It’s episodes like this that make us wonder how on earth Torres stayed with him throughout the show.

“Ex Post Facto”: Jake Tom did some more suffering in this early-seasons dud of an episode. We’ve seen Star Trek do film noir to a slightly better effect in something like DS9’s “Necessary Evil,” but this one just whiffs hard at the style. It doesn’t help that the Baneans’ hair feathers are distracting as hell and that the conclusion that the damn dog helps solve stretches credulity to its very limits. Have the writers never met a dog before?

“Concerning Flight”: Caitlin You’d think John Rhys-Davies playing Leonardo da Vinci would elevate an episode to something greater, but somehow this baffling episode proved to be a waste of time. We spent most of it confused by pretty much everyone’s motivations. Why did Tau keep da Vinci around? How did da Vinci not notice anything was out of the ordinary on this planet? Does the sun always set in the same place on this planet? Who knows!

“Body and Soul”: Ames I’ve clumped a bunch of really gross, sexist episodes together if only to rile myself up because I hate these kinds of episodes so much. But how can one not get riled up when Seven tells the Doctor that he violated her and his response is to blame her? What should be a fun romp watching Jeri Ryan get to pretend to be another character is horribly tainted by that “she was asking for it” attitude. And then for Seven to be the one to apologize while the Doctor never sees what he did was wrong: VOMIT!

“Retrospect”: Chris Oh look, more violating Seven of Nine! This show really couldn’t help itself sometimes. What else was there to do when you had an attractive woman on the cast but to exploit her? If this episode was trying to debunk false memories, it failed hard by making it about a violation of a woman character because then the only thing you can see is the allegory for fake rape allegations, and that is not the message you want to send. Plus the doctor suddenly peddling pseudoscience is just nonsense.

“Blood Fever”: Ames Here’s another gross sexual act that I’ve never been quite okay with. Pon farr as a plot device was fine enough in “Amok Time.” Weird and kind of illogical, but fine. But when Vorik goes and sexually assaults Torres and everyone tries to sweep it under the rug because it’s some weird Vulcan bullshit, that’s not fine. And when Tom makes it clear that it would not be consensual for him and Torres to bang it out but Tuvok insists they do, I am all the more disgusted. No means no, Vulcans!

“Sacred Ground”: Ames, Jake We’ve got some overlap in our remaining bottom picks, starting with this absolutely nonsensical debate between science and faith that just boils down to: believe everything you’re told without questioning it and maybe magic is real. There’s a reason this franchise usually shies away from addressing religion in this kind of way. It’s one thing for a character (or a person in real life!) to have faith; it’s quite another for miracles to just happen for plot convenience (unless you’re part wormhole alien or something).

“11:59”: Caitlin, Chris, Jake The hatred for Henry Janeway is strong in this room (though that might be because Chris skews the curve a bit). But he’s just a wet blanket of a character who’s just taking his son and his whole damn town down to his level through sheer obstinance. Add to that the fact that he seriously has no chemistry with Shannon – like really, he could be her father – and you’ve got a massive clunker of an episode on your hands.

“Fury”: Caitlin, Chris, Jake The series as a whole wasted Kes as a character, which was quite the shame to watch, but the one thing it did do was give her a poignant and powerful farewell in “The Gift.” But Voyager can giveth and Voyager can taketh away, and this return of Jennifer Lien as the hardened, hellbent, furious Kes basically attempts to ruin her character. This was not the Kes we knew and loved, and damned if we even understand how she got there. How dare they do this to our sweeting!

“Elogium”: Ames, Caitlin, Chris, Jake Finally, the one we all agree on is some other weird sex claptrap. The Vulcans may have their pon farr (which I hate enough on its own), but the Ocampa have elogium, which somehow makes even less sense! Biology aside (blegh), the rest of the episode is confused in its messaging: these are people who are not ready for a baby, but instead of really exploring what that means for them, we’re stuck with this weird Ocampan heat thing. This whole episode has lost its sex appeal!

—

See also: our Top Five Star Trek VOY Episodes list! And why not: here’re all the seasonal tops and bottoms from seasons 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, and 7!

We’ll still miss the Voyager and her plucky crew of misfits… just not when they were being racist or misogynist for no reason. And while I’d love to say we’re glad all those bad episodes are over, there’s always more bad ideas to go around. Let’s see how our next show in the rotation compares as we prepare ourselves for our next watchthrough: Star Trek: Enterprise! We’d love for you to watch along with us on SoundCloud or whatever podcast platform is your favorite, to hang out with us on Facebook and Twitter, and to really brace yourself because we know more pon farr action is on the way. Ew.

[siryouarebeingmocked]

...Huh.

[biggoldbelt]

Behind the Glamour of 'Dark Winds' Season 3 with Bruce Greenwood

Bruce Greenwood Interview by Big Gold Belt Media with @GothamGeekGirl Bruce Greenwood (“Tom Spenser”)–Synopsis:The expanded third season, featuring eight episodes, picks up six months after the events of Season 2 and follows Lt. Joe Leaphorn (Zahn McClarnon) and Jim Chee (Kiowa Gordon) as they investigate the disappearance of two boys, with only an abandoned bicycle and blood-stained patch of…

[thejakeformerlyknownasprince]

Firstly, I love all of your writing. Secondly, I swear to god that there’s a scene in eleutherophobia where Jake and Marco are obliquely discussing erek and the Chee and Tom gets mad at them for not telling him about the chee but on my life I cannot find it. Would you be so kind as to point it out (or point out that I’ve hallucinated it)?

Oh yeah, it's not in Eleutherophobia per se! I posted it here on my tumblr, because I cut it from the fic it originally belonged to.