#ttyd has always been one of my favorite games of all time so to see the remake actually acknowledge vivian as trans

[magnecalliope]

In the original Japanese version of The Thousand-Year Door, Vivian was written as a transgender woman, but that element of Vivian's identity was removed in the English localization, where instead of bullying Vivian about her gender, Beldam called her ugly. Now, when Vivian is traveling with Mario in Chapter 4's Twilight Town, it's revealed that her original backstory is intact: "Truth is, it took me a while to realize I was their sister... not their brother," Vivian tells Mario. "Now their usual bullying feels heavier."

🎉🎉🎉 diversity win! this game's minor antagonists are now transphobes in english as well as japanese.

[bahamutgames]

Paper Mario: The Thousand Afterthoughts

Game: Paper Mario: The Thousand Year Door (May 23, 2024)

Console: Nintendo Switch

It's that time again!! If you had told me not too long ago that I'd have to give my thoughts on 2 different Mario RPG remakes on Switch (and an upcoming brand new M&L) so close to each other, I would've laughed you out of the room. But here we are. And now I look quite foolish, don't I?

My mood is kinda in free fall and I only want to write about these Mario RPGs when I'm in a good mood, but I think I'm okay right now. So I'll capitalize on it. Similar to the Super Mario RPG Remake I'll try to focus on what makes this such a lovely remake rather than gushing about why I adore TTYD. But if you're curious, it has some of the best characters, writing, and combat in the series. While I also think it's a really padded out game. That's my micro review of the original. Okay? Okay.

As always, this isn't a review. Just me throwing up my thoughts. Go play Thousand Year Door RIGHT NOW. Either the original or the remake. I'll wait.

Now that they're gone-

SPOILERS FOR THOUSAND YEAR DOOR AHEAD, YOU'VE BEEN WARNED!!

Opening

I feel like I've given you my long, tragic backstory with Mario RPGs a billion times but if you somehow missed it. These were my favorite games of all time, they fell off, I get sad, so on and so forth. Thousand Year Door is one of my favorite video games ever, in the trio of greatest Mario games ever made you have Super Mario RPG, Bowser's Inside Story, and TTYD. And, yeah, needless to say. I was bummed when Paper Mario started to go in its new direction. But I'd like to not give that the oxygen of attention at the moment.

So when they were like "Oh there's one last thing" in that direct, the MILLISECOND that first note hit I was like "HUH???" And I flipped my fucking LID, I couldn't believe they were ACTUALLY gonna remake TTYD. And not only that, it was looking good! And then it came out and I couldn't afford it lol.

But thankfully my good friend (Idk if they want me to name them here so I'll avoid it for the time being) bought it for me. Which was so so so nice of them and I genuinely appreciate it cause this was such a wonderful experience. So this review is sponsored by my friend :)

And again, I'll skip the suspense. This is another WONDERFUL remake that's a total love letter to the original and understands what made it so good.

Stuff I liked

I think the best place to start would be with how faithful this is to the original. It doesn't change pretty much ANYTHING. If there's any major changes to stuff that was in the original (not counting new content) I can't remember it. Not that I was expecting them to change it but still, it's nice that they didn't like, butcher it or something crazy. It's the same good plot, pretty much an identical script (with any changes being for the better imo.), and the same wonderful gameplay.

But of course, what makes a remake interesting is what ACTUALLY gets changed. And I think pretty much right out the gate you'll notice the MASSIVE graphics overhaul this game got. It takes a more papercraft approach like the secondary Paper Mario Trilogy (SS, CS, OK) but applies it to the worlds from the original game. And it looks AMAZING! This is basically exactly what I wanted ever since we got to see the SS Flavion in Smash 3DS lmao. In addition to that there's SO many new sprites in this game for each character. It's actually crazy just how much new animations there are for everyone. Not just teammates, who now have back sprites and TONS of facial expressions and reactions, but even enemies and NPCs have TONS of new things that can do. Sometimes enemies will laugh at you if you get fucked over, people will change to match the mood of what they're saying. It's actually crazy, I had to stop playing every 5 seconds to look at all the new sprites and details. One of my personal favorite new expressions is Mario tipping his hat in respect when death is brought up. It's small but it's such a Mario thing to do and I actually flipped out when I first saw it.

Then there's the redone soundtrack. OH MY GOD it's SOOOOO GOOD. This might be a better OST than the original, and may be one of my new favorite Mario RPG OSTs in general. Every song is lovingly redone and they all sound SO NICE. In particular the battle theme, which changes for each chapter, is SUCH a treat. I adored that. All the boss remixes are great (Cortez in particular was a big shock that I loved) and I believe the teammate themes are actually new. This was also a lovely addition. Bobbery (not biased because he's my favorite partner) probably has my favorite theme. And some of my favorite songs, 'Happiness and Sadness' + 'We're Counting On You, Mario' were both SO well done!! And it's changes and upgrades like these that REALLY add to the experience and make it even better in my opinion! Or at least, wonderful to reexperience!

Then of course there's the combat, which is pretty much completely unchanged as far as I can recall? But they did actually add new super bosses which was really cool! You can fight Prince Mush which is neat, and Whacka which is AWESOME! This actually gives a reason to do the Pit of 100 Trials a second time (fun fact, this remake was my first time ever beating the pit! And I did it without dying. You can retry a floor if you die in this remade version of the pit, just as an fyi).

And the game over all is filled with nice little changes like that. Stuff that's maybe not ground breaking, or giving you a brand new reason to try it like the changes to Super Mario RPG's combat. But in my opinion, these small quality of life improvements are just as good. A much easier to access quick travel room to warp to each chapter is added in the sewers. Saving is instant, similar to Origami King and such. Most of the backtracking that people complain about has been cut out with simple pipes and springs in convenient locations. They even add more stuff to collect like letting you unlock CONCEPT ART WHICH IS SO FUCKING COOL, I still haven't looked through it all but it's actually amazing they did this and I'd KILL for Mario Art Books from every Mario game please just release more Mario concept art UGH. And of course there's the changed dialogue to confirm vivian being trans which is so nice, and I'm honestly shocked they actually did it. It feels almost un-nintendo of them to do. But I'm so happy they did it! It's a real remake, baby!!

In general, yeah, this game is perfect. It's filled with clear love for the original, without being afraid of acknowledging where improvements were made in future titles. Like, again, instant saving or the really nice graphics or music changing for each chapter. And while there aren't any WILD changes like brand new cutscenes in the Super Mario RPG remake, I'd say what they add and ultimately didn't add makes this such a wonderful remake all the same. I had a blast playing it and it felt so good to just, genuinely no coping love playing Paper Mario again!

Stuff I didn't like

But of course no game is perfect. And I do have some nit picks. Like, why don't they use Mario's official new signature when he signs up to join the Glitz Pit? No but seriously, folks-

There's not much wrong with this remake, there's some small stuff like them not fixing EVERY bit of fluff from the original. You still have to mash 100 times for the 'I Love You' scene. Which is funny! But like, no one complains about THIS but you all complain about a little backtracking? Amateur hour. I also think the Prince Mush fight isn't as cool as everyone says it is. I'm not huge on fights where you have to play 100% perfectly but I know that's just a me thing. And I wish SO badly they could've done a tiny bit more to have teammates interact with each other more. Although I do love that everyone comes out whenever you stand on the altar in front of the door. But like, I think everyone should've come out when the Crystal Stars are gathering everyone's wishes... OH MY GOD I FORGOT THEY MADE THE CRYSTAL STARS UGLY IN THIS REMAKE OH NOOOOO GAME RUINED-

But really, I think my big main complaint is that this remake feels a little... Too easy? Compared to the original. In the original the game is MASSIVELY padded out by having you get constantly fucked over by the stage elements. But this time I swear I got hit by a stage element maybe 2 or 3 times. But my enemy was CONSTANTLY getting fried or slammed to death in every fight. It's too common on the enemies, but feels like it's massively toned down on you. I think in the original you can get fucked over a bit much, but this doesn't feel like a compromise, if that makes sense?

Final Thoughts

But WHO CARES!! This remake is SO good! Genuinely, if you love Thousand Year Door, if you hate Thousand Year Door, if you've never played Paper Mario in your life. I think you owe it to yourself to finally experience this wonderful video game. It's truly one of my favorite video games ever and I think it's such a fantastic entry into the RPG genre.

From small changes to big changes, this is a wonderful remake. I don't know if I'd say it's a replacement to the original, personally. I actually think the original's more simple graphics have a GREAT and cartoonish feel to them that's lost a little bit with the papercraft look. And obviously nostalgia is a hell of a drug, but if someone told me they prefer this version? It's absolutely a no-brainer why. I'm so happy I loved this game so much...

Sooooo, how about that Paper Mario 64 remake, guys-

===

And that's that! Once again, I know I've said this a million times. But even though this remake was amazing and made me fall in love with Paper Mario all over again. I'm still waiting patiently for them to do a new Paper Mario in this style. I'm only so impressed that they made an amazing game amazing again. I want to know if they have what it takes to make something BRAND NEW with such a wonderful plot, characters, and combat. I'm very excited for the potential of future Mario RPGs regardless though, and I can't wait to see what's in store for us with Brothership. But Intelligent Systems, I AM wait for a new Paper Mario in this style. You've been warned.

That's all I have for now. Go out and play a game you adore!

[ask-dimentio-the-jester]

((Artist's Update))

(( I wont be speaking in character what so ever. Just me. Some may know me as @ag-piers , some as @ask-dimentio-the-jester , however, behind the artists between roleplaying as those 2 characters, it's just me. Firby It's been a while, maybe even years huh? I love this blog not gonna lie, but I wanna explain stuff in 3 points! Let's start shall we? ^^

(( So..much...stuff.. Lately, I have been drawing a lot of other things, being more into the Kirby community. I took a break from the SPM community due to seeing how much drama existed and in reality, Kirby has always been my #1 favorite and SPM my 2nd. Don't worry, I miss drawing Dimentio and I want to draw him again, just need ideas on how to draw him since...well I drew him in so much ways through the ask blog I cant think of new ideas for him haha.

Streaming - Something I have been doing for at least 2 years! I would Roleplay as one of my characters I've made years ago. I am always roleplaying as him in the streams. Yes I know. I'm female and he's male, yes I change my voice for him.

-@AG_Piers' Stream Link-

I also enjoy roleplaying with people there! Currently, I'm streaming TTYD Remake, and roleplay that my viewers are characters from the game! It's so fun, I'm enjoying it a lot. Perhaps one-day SPM Remake?!?!?

Yes Vtuber, I promise I'm family-friendly & not..."weird"...like the other ones out there.

I even draw in streams on Saturdays! (not rn cuz of ttyd remake)

((Of course i do! I'm too addicted to art to stop... Art - I cant stop drawing so still doing art! Simultaneously rping that my character AG_Piers is drawing. Have I ever told ya that I love my character I've made? Kirby art mostly, some original art, and hopefully Dimentio again! @ag-piers is the main account with all the arts! You can ask questions in that blog too. I may or may not draw it in the style I have been doing it in this blog! (Making my own kirby fan merch and original characters merch and hopefully soon I can sell them! Maybe a dimentio sticker even in the future-)

(( I'm even trying to do more animations as you can see! Simple, but something!

"It Has been a while~"

(( We've had some fun, silly, serious, and depressing moments with this Dimentio ask blog. It was fun, I enjoyed it a lot actually! I still have that Dimentio plush, I still love Dimentio a whole lot. Still my favorite Mario character of all time. I do miss drawing him and hope I can draw him again, not as an ask blog but just casually in my main account for now. Don't worry tho! I won't quit this blog, just a long break is all. Who knows how long at the moment because I'm doing so many projects right now wanting to do more stuff like making fan merch and making my characters something more than just drawings. I guess...and then work, but, rest assured, I will NOT completely quit/abandon this blog. I just need a very very long break. when I ever do come back, I will decide what to answer and when to answer, like whenever I have free time and wanna draw a question! As for now, taking a break! If you just enjoy the things I make, art I do, etc. You look into my main account. All links are in the above that I've mentioned. This is NOT a goodbye, but a "To Be Continued..?"

[molsno]

I’m skipping the middleman on that trans ask game and just answering all the questions myself <3

this is long so it’s under a read more

1. How did you choose your name?

in senior year of high school, while I was in french class, I was thinking about the word vivre, to live, and how it conjugated. I forget what tense it is, but one way of conjugating it is “nous vivions”, and it dawned on me that the name vivian is based on the word vivre (or its latin origin). of course, I already liked the name due to the character from paper mario ttyd, but knowing that it means life really spoke to me, as I think the ability to live is a precious thing that shouldn’t be wasted. I decided pretty much then and there that I would name my daughter vivian some day. well... then I got the chance to play a character in my friend’s danganronpa killing game, and I thought playing a girl would be interesting. granted, I also already knew I was an egg and saw this as an opportunity to try out my favorite name, so I created vivian tamochi. as you might have guessed, I loved being her so much that I made vivian my actual name

2. What gives you the most dysphoria?

um, hearing recordings of my own voice probably. I always think that I sound very feminine but then I hear a recording of myself and it sounds like a bad impression

3. Do you have more physical dysphoria or more social dysphoria?

more social I guess? actually yeah I think all of the dysphoria-induced breakdowns I’ve had have been because of social things

4. What do you do to perform self-care when you’re feeling dysphoric?

something that helps a lot is shaving, especially when it’s a fullbody shave

5. What was the first time you suspected you were transgender?

this is a bit embarrassing but it was honestly christmas eve 2018. I saw my little cousin (I think she was 8 at the time) wearing a pretty dress and I felt sort of jealous that I never got to do that when I was her age. I was so confused about this feeling that I told my trans friend kyra about it and after asking me to clarify what I meant she linked me to the egg_irl subreddit. that was the first time I seriously considered it

6. When did you realize you were transgender?

I told my friend amanda how I’d been confused about my gender and she offered to take me to goodwill to try on some clothes. I was extremely nervous about it while we were there and I really had to work up the courage to not only pick out some clothes to try, but also take them to the fitting room with me. but once I put on a skirt for the first time I stood there for like a solid 5 minutes just looking at myself in the mirror with the biggest happiest smile on my face. in that moment I finally understood what gender euphoria was. I couldn’t deny I was trans any longer, it was just a matter of working up the courage to tell people

7. What is your favorite part of being transgender?

um, probably that I feel like a person now. also the little things, like seeing my hips get bigger or looking at how long my hair has gotten. just little things to smile about!

8. How would you explain your gender identity to others?

um, I’m girl <3

9. How did you come out? If you didn’t come out, why do you stay in the closet? Or what happened when you were outed?

I mean it depends on who, but I decided to do it on national coming out day 2019, in my discord server with friends. basically I commented on it being national coming out day and reposted my intro in the introductions channel with my new name and pronouns. everyone there sorta saw it coming I’m pretty sure

10. What have your experiences been with packing or tucking?

I’ve tucked a few times in public. it’s uncomfortable for sure, but not terrible once you get used to it. the idea of it made me squeamish at first, I’ll admit. but since I haven’t had much excuse to go out in girlmode the past year or so, I haven’t tucked much

11. What are your experiences with binding or wearing breast forms?

the closest I’ve ever gotten to wearing breast forms is wearing a bra every day for..... almost a year now? it doesn’t serve much purpose other than letting me feel something there, though that is changing since I’ve been on hrt for several months

12. Do you pass?

I mean... probably not? I feel like I’m very visibly trans. there have been like two times where I’ve been gendered correctly in public (one in girlmode, one not) but those are extremely rare

13. What (if any) steps do you want to take to medically transition?

well I’ve been on hrt for 8 months now so that’s one thing. I want to get laser hair removal for my facial hair because that’s one of the biggest sources of dysphoria for me, but yknow. that’s expensive! according to my understanding my insurance supposedly should cover bottom surgery, but I’m honestly in no rush to get that. I don’t really have much bottom dysphoria, but it would be nice to get surgery some day

14. How long have you been out?

it’s been about a year and two months now...... time flies

15. What labels have you used before you’ve settled on your current set?

up until I was like 17 I was incredibly insistent on being cis and straight despite very obvious (in retrospect) signs to the contrary. around 18 I was very confused why all my friends were lgbt in some form and also I kinda started realizing I don’t mind dick, and I thought it would all make sense if I was bi. I identified as cis and bi for like 4 years or so but the longer it went on the more wrong it felt considering I had never once during that time been attracted to a man

16. Have you ever experienced transphobia?

surprisingly not really? the most transphobia I’ve experienced has been a result of automated processes like proctored testing or emails. of course, I’ve seen all the nasty shit that terfs say about people like me, but I’ve never been a victim of it directly

17. What do you do when you have to go to the bathroom in public?

if there is a universal restroom that I can lock from inside then I use that. if not, I sigh dramatically and sadly use the men’s room

18. How does your family feel about your trans identity?

truthfully I don’t know. my mom seems accepting enough, but with the pandemic going on I haven’t talked to her much. I know my sister is aware, and shockingly she seems supportive too, but we haven’t talked about it in depth

19. Would you ever go stealth, and if you are stealth, why do you choose to be stealth?

if I could go stealth I would. I’m sorry but I don’t want to be visibly trans

20. What do you wish you could have shared with your younger self about being trans?

the sooner you start transitioning the happier you’ll be. by denying this part of yourself you’re just making yourself miserable

21. Why do you use the pronouns you use?

she/her makes me happiest. I’ve (against my will, mind you) used they/them and been called molsno in a group that I wasn’t out in, and..... it made me feel..... distant, I guess? it was better than he/him, but it felt much less personal

22. Do your neurodivergencies and/or disabilities affect your gender?

I mean...... yeah? as a trans lesbian it’s very easy for me to hate masculinity given how it’s instilled nothing but negative feelings in me literally my entire life, and being autistic makes it harder to understand how the things I say about gender negatively impact the people around me

23. What’s your biggest trans-related fear?

the fear that I may never be able to believe I can be loved as a woman, probably

24. What medical, social, or personal steps have you already taken to start your transition?

coming out nearly everywhere and getting on hrt!

25. What do you wish cis people understood?

I desperately wish cis people understood even the basics of trans issues. still to this day many cis people don’t even know the right terminology to use for trans people. they think “trans man” and “trans woman” mean the opposite of what they actually mean and that’s just so goddamn frustrating. many of them think transitioning is just bottom surgery and that’s it. like, they don’t know anything about hrt. cis people please educate yourselves on trans issues I’m begging you

26. What impact has being trans had on your life?

it’s affected many aspects of my life but I think the biggest one is that I feel like a person now. I always felt like a robot, or like someone putting on a performance before, but I feel like a human being now

27. What do you do to validate yourself?

ummm... not much really. I guess one thing that has helped is making my character astrid trans? because if I ever think something bad about myself I can stop myself and ask if I would think the same thing about her, and of course the answer is no.

28. How do you feel about trans representation in media?

it’s bad. trans women very rarely get any positive representation. like the only transfem characters that come to mind that I think were handled well were lily hoshikawa from zombieland saga and vivian from paper mario (although even that’s debatable given the english censorship about her gender and the way beldam abuses her in japanese). meanwhile nonbinary representation consists almost exclusively of aliens, shapeshifters, robots, etc. and trans men get literally nothing. like. trans representation is just so abysmal it’s not even funny

29. Who is your favorite trans celebrity?

umm....... I don’t really care about celebrities lol. if I were to answer this question it would be “oh yes I’ve heard of these people”

30. Who is the transgender person who has influenced you the most?

gosh, how could I ever decide? most of my friends are trans so it’s hard to say but if I had to answer.... my friends kyra and modeus were probably the most helpful when I was figuring myself out

31. How are you involved with the trans community, IRL or online?

mostly online

32. How do you see yourself identifying and presenting in 5 years?

I’ll almost certainly still be a woman, and hopefully my transition will have gone well enough that I’ll be able to pass

33. What trans issue are you most passionate about?

healthcare. the difficulty so many people face with getting access to trans healthcare is ridiculous and discriminatory. I’ve written essays for school about this topic and they were the easiest essays I’ve had to write because of how passionate I am about this

34. What advice would you give to other trans people, or what message would you like to share with them?

pick your head up queen/king/royal, your cat ears are falling down

35. How do you feel your gender interacts with your race, disability, class, weight, etc. from the perspective of intersectionality?

well I’m white, able bodied, average weight, and I’m about to get a degree in computer science, so I have a lot of privilege that other trans people don’t have. I fully recognize that. it breaks my heart that so many less privileged trans people, particularly trans women of color, are murdered and never even get the justice they deserve. I wish there was more I could do to stop it, but privileged as I am, I’m only one person. I want everyone to be aware of who the major victims of transphobia are. look out for black trans women especially, they need your protection and support most of all

36. What, if any, is the difference between your gender identity and your gender expression?

not much. I’m a woman with a very feminine gender expression, when I’m free to be. the biggest feminine thing that I don’t do is makeup, but that’s more due to dysphoria rather than a distaste for it

37. Do you feel more masculine, feminine, or neither?

feminine uwu

38. What is your sexual and romantic orientation, and what are your thoughts on it?

I am a lesbian and that is very epic of me. I love girls and seeing girls in love makes me happy and imagining myself as a girl in love with another girl makes me even happier

39. Is your ideal partner also trans, or do you not have a preference?

I always hate admitting this, but due to personal reasons, my ideal partner is cis. this is mostly because I very much want to have biological children, and that’s simply not possible with another trans woman. I wouldn’t rule out an afab nonbinary person entirely, it just really depends on how comfortable said person is with femininity and also how they feel about dating a lesbian. if not for my desire to have kids (which is not something I’m willing to compromise on since it has been my lifelong dream) I would have a lot more options. truth be told, cis women kind of scare me, and it would be so much easier to date someone who fundamentally understands what it’s like to be trans. but biology is cruel unfortunately

40. How did/do you manage waiting to transition?

it was incredibly difficult. thankfully, it didn’t last very long. I only had to wait about 6 months, and most of that time was spent waiting until I was able to bank sperm because I didn’t want to risk becoming permanently infertile after starting hrt

41. What is the place (blog, website, forum, IRL space) you get most of your info on being trans or on trans related things?

ngl...... reddit. the trans boards have many, many helpful resources for transfem people. I don’t really go there anymore but it was immensely helpful in the early stages

42. Do you interact with other trans people IRL?

I mean..... yeah, but not very much anymore on account of the pandemic. I made a few trans friends junior year of college and we still talk occasionally, but it’s been several months since I last saw them all

43. Are you involved in any trans-related activism?

not really 😔

44. Free space! Answer any question you want, or make up your own question to answer.

“Wow Vivi how come you’re so epic?”

I was born this way <3

[falcon6]

Learning to Create

It’s really difficult for me to admit that I’m an artist of any capacity. A lot of times, I consider that sort of term to be dedicated only to the working artist. You know, the ones who actually get paid for their work. The ones who end up creating things for everyone. The ones I admire greatly, to the point that I consider them to be living on Mt. Olympus while I’m stuck at a temple waiting for a chariot up a very steep road.

The place I work at now is a place where I don’t get to really create for myself. I create for other people. When I’m done there, I seldom get to make things for myself at home. There is an effort, of course, when I’m able to do so, but it’s hard to be that focused after toiling a retail job for 7 hours a day. You end up taking the opportunity to decompress and that ends up becoming an 8-hour decompress and you need to go to bed. That’s how it is for an adult, I guess. Don’t recommend growing up.

And that “9-5 Job, Now Do Nothing For Hours” mindset is something I need to work on, to be sure. In my mind, I see myself as someone who needs to be able to do something. I can’t make art to decompress, because art is supposed to be something important. I toil and toil, thinking about the process I need to decide on doing. “How do I become an artist like my favorite artists?” “What is the correct methods of learning it?”

How do I climb the mountain and join the greats?

In my monthly stint of introspection, I was watching a friend play Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door. To this day, it may still be my favorite game. Watching it again brings back a lot of genuinely good memories, both inside and outside of the game. The charm that filled the game’s varied and interesting world and cast has still yet to be matched for my personal tastes. And for years, it was the game I played whenever I needed a good pick-me-up.

Watching him play it for the first time and getting to hear the same sort of reactions I had to it 14 years ago ended up bringing an...odd memory back to me. And it involves this image.

Low-Quality Vivian For The Low-Quality Needs

Perhaps not this specific image in particular - the internet could have phased out that one- but something similar to it.

See, back in 2004 I was just getting in on the whole Internet thing. This was back when people used what was called an “internet forum”. This was a place where people can post their thoughts on a wide range of topics, such as: “How do you jump in Metroid?”, “This game sucks”, and “Do you think Kingdom Hearts 2 will be on Gamecube?”.

I was part of one forum for a good part of my teenage life. I started at around January of 2004, in fact. I suppose I consider that a turning point in my life if I remember it to that degree.

I was fairly active in that forum. And as I began to make my posts, I began to notice something. At the bottom of every post was what you called a signature.

Copyright Falcon 2018, filed under the Trademark of Best Girl 2004

They were a cute little way to signify that you were the one who was making the post. It was one of the small creative outlets this particular forum had given users, though you still needed it to be both 45-ish pixels tall and kept at a low file size to help those with 56k modems.

Typing that out makes me feel really old.

There were people who were making these small images underneath their posts and the cool, hip guy I was as a teenager was like “OH BOY I WANNA DO THAT TOO!”. Of course, in order to create this sort of stuff I had to be...sneaky.

Back then, I found a pirated copy of Paint Shop Pro 7. It worked decently enough for me, but as I was a young lad with strong moral values - I didn’t even curse until well into my later teens, the frickin’ twit - I felt extremely guilty doing this. So for my birthday that year, I ended up getting a legit copy of Paint Shop Pro 8. It was at that point, I suppose, that my desire to create stuff was ignited. I was thrown into the wide world of graphic design, making sigs for myself and others.

I eventually upgraded to Photoshop 7 - after throwing away all of those moral values and growing the confidence to say the fuck-word - walking even further into this new world for me. I started making signatures for people in flashier ways, abused lens flare to the point of blinding half of Nintendo fanboys, and even dabbled in creating wallpapers for people to use. This was back when 1024x768 was the norm, if you can believe that.

I talk about this because when my friend was playing TTYD, I decided to look up art of some characters again, and found Vivian - one of the party members in the game - once more. Only, this time, in a way higher fidelity than I had 14 years ago.

Best Girl in A Good Resolution.

In general, I’d consider TTYD as the game that first got me encroaching into graphic design. This was not due to the game’s art, which is still fantastic, but because of so many people suddenly wanting signatures of their favorite new party members in that restrictive 48 pixel height.

I would get private messages in the forum asking for sigs with Mario, Goombella, Koops, Yoshi, Vivian, Bobbery, the X-Nauts, Bowser, Peach...Rawk Hawk a few times...even had Zess T. the cook in there. It was wild.

So imagine my surprise going through Google Image Search for a post about Vivian and finding an image of her that was extremely close to the kind of art I had to work with back then. I worked for a long time trying to figure out how to deal with the blur of the pisspoor scan with its low resolution and JPEG artifacts. Back then, finding official art was pretty difficult alone, and official art that actually looked like it was scanned with proper care? You were basically stuck with what you had and needed to figure out how to hide it. The people who could find clean concept art became our dealer providing the good shit while we provided our services to others.

Otherwise, you just worked with what you had. This was problem solving. Back then, you didn’t have access to as many tutorials as you do now. You absolutely didn’t have as much access to tablets. Those were from Wacom only and they were expensive. So you were essentially on your own, only getting help from the occasional artist who decided to make small tutorials on the forum.

Thankfully most of the people for signature requests were also teenagers as well, who just thought you were amazing for doing this for them.

I suppose all this reminiscing got me thinking about that mountain again. The paths up the mountain are long but they’re rarely ever getting longer or shorter, just easier to traverse. Nowadays, tablets are so much easier to acquire and art programs have gotten a lot more manageable. Art you want to look at or study or even use for your small projects are readily available, with services that makes buying personalized art easy and supporting artists even easier.

The knowledge about art programs and processes is nigh-infinite at this point. You can get a young artist’s commentary about their own virtues of art in a single tweet at lunch and get an experienced artist’s commentary at dinner. You can get atelier-level art lessons for free on Youtube.

Almost anything you want to learn is feasible now. Climbing the mountain is easier than ever.

So naturally, with my inferiority complex in full swing, I always have to ask myself why I haven’t started climbing the mountain yet. Why haven’t I just started the trek up the mountain pass already towards becoming a technically-skilled artist?

And the answer is, I am.

It’s just at my pace.

When I was a kid playing make-believe with others in the playground, I was making steps. Throughout all my teenage years of making signatures for people, making wallpapers for others, and even making a properly-awful sprite comic, I was making steps. When I was getting people stealing my sketchbook and making marks over my drawing of a Sonic character at lunch in high school, I was still making steps. When I was being critiqued by people for my skills in ways I felt were unfair or spiteful, I was still making steps. Every time I open Photoshop or SAI and stare at a blank canvas and will myself into making a mark on there, I’m still making a step.

Every step further from the start point, which is far and away from where I am now.

In my mind, I still can’t help but feel like where I should be is as some sort of master of art, but it’s really not fair to me. In hindsight, if I had drawn something every single day with intent, I could be a technical genius with knowledge of all the principles of design lodged firmly in my mind. It sounds amazing, but that’s not something I did.

Considering “what could have been” ignores what I am now. I am someone with knowledge in these various programs for over 14 years. I’ve dabbled in multiple projects, some in my own design. I can consider those things invariably shit, but the stuff I did there was stuff I did on my own terms, which I learned from. I wrote fanfics, did signatures for people, made wallpapers and webcomics, designed websites, did roleplaying, made a storyline based on friends’ characters in an MMO, and played tabletop games creating characters that became some of my favorite creations in my lifetime.

I would never want to trade that away for some sort of technical skill level-up. I’ve made too many great friends because of all of this. I am who I am because of how I’ve gotten here.

Learning how to create is all about taking the opportunities as they come along. Even this post is, essentially, me seeing one image online after a game session with friends and getting a nostalgia blast for something completely unrelated to the game itself.

The act of creating is simply doing. If you do, you create. If you create, you create art.

If you create art, you are an artist.

Don’t let your inner thoughts dissuade you from that fact, ever.

Thanks for reading.