#turn this into a silver fan account lmao

[audditea]

The sword ⚔️

[super-paper]

A bit of a vent, if that's okay; I think one of the most frustrating things regarding this chapter has been the overall behavior from the fandom, and this sort of mandatory love for anything from the manga. I get it, when we love something we can't bear other people talking bad about it (I'm the same way with some things), but it's annoying how a lot of us haven't been allowed to criticize or show any anger/disappointment about the chapter. It's upsetting, especially as an Izuku stan, to see other accounts (famous accounts too) claim that if we're disappointed with Izuku then we hate his character. That we're too stupid and cynical to think Izuku did anything wrong at all and wasn't allowed to defend himself. That we can't read if we think Izuku and Bakugo killed Kurogiri, or that Izuku wasn't able to save Shigaraki because after all he did free him from his abuser and made him recognize that he was in fact a crying child. And to each their own I suppose; but putting interpretations of arcs and narratives aside, this overall superiority of "there's nothing wrong with this chapter, you just don't get it so shut up" and the undermining of how a lot of fans feel is seriously infuriating. (Maybe this is how people felt when I'd argue that Armored Might wasn't character assassination lol). I'm just tired of getting called every name in the book for having my own criticisms, and getting accused of hating Izuku, or seeing Shigaraki stans undermined as if they weren't aloud to feel sad about it. Because it's exactly why people loved those characters and arcs so much that they feel such a strong reaction to 423. I'm upset with the weird ooc behavior and lack of introspection from Izuku because I love his character so much. And I'm upset with this chapter because I love this manga and wanna see a well written conclusion for the characters and story.

Nah, I definitely feel the same. So many fans have been taking the words of upset Tenko and Izuku fans out of context (or even outright twisting their words around) and using it as an excuse to be bullies. I'm sorry if folks have been harassing you.

At any rate, I think you have every right to criticize the chapter. Like, I'm very much a silver-lining-look-on-the-bright-side type of guy-- and even I'm having trouble finding anything to like about it lmao 😭. Basically, I liked AFO's conclusion... on the surface, at least. But then my mind goes right back to thinking about Tenko and how AFO's conclusion/treatment is yet another thing that ultimately contributed to his death, and I get mad all over again lmao. Like, an ending where Tenko gets turned into a "cautionary tale" that "everyone learns from" is pretty much the last thing I wanted for his character. It's basically ~*~building a better society~*~ on top of his corpse. And what exactly is his life/death cautioning against exactly? Grooming?? Stranger danger??? Being kidnapped by literally the worst guy alive when you're five years old and getting brainwashed into believing you were born evil???? LARPing????? Like.... it just feels like all of Tenko's suffering was ultimately just used as a stepping stone in order to finally rid the world of AFO-- and like, rationally, I know this isn't the case and I'm oversimplifying things, but like.. the way the rain stops and the sun starts shining as Tenko evaporates... uuuuoohhhgh---

*cough* Anyway! I'm also a staunch Iron Might defender, but like. In that particular case it was very obvious to me why Iron Might was necessary + a fitting end to Toshinori's arc. In Izuku's case, I simply cannot see how chapters 420-423 ultimately do right by his character. Since chapter 1, Izuku becoming "a great hero"/"more heroic than anyone else" was always tied to his drive to save when no one else is able (or willing) to. So these chapters being framed as the "climax/finale' of his character arc-- these chapters where he doesn't stop to think about saving Tenko at all and just focuses on wiping AFO out-- betray the very core of his character while also betraying the very premise of the series. Like. This is bad. This is bad bad and I sincerely, honestly want to believe Hori has something up his sleeve that'll somehow fix things. 😭But even if it is a fake out, and even if Hori reveals Izuku had some sort of plan all along... I don't think it'll undo the damage to the readers' trust atp, sadly.

(Like...! So many of Izuku's defining moments involve him standing up to abusers on behalf of their victims. The moments that define him as a hero have him encouraging those victims to fight back and reclaim agency over their bodies/powers-- but even though Tenko ultimately did fight back, it feels disingenuous to give Izuku any sort of actual credit in this situation bc, again, Izuku wasn't thinking of Tenko at all while he was beating Tenko's body AFO into dust lmao. Like I've been saying, so much of 423 is just indefensibly bad writing and Izuku and Tenko's characters deserved better than this).

[beevean]

The reason I haven't watched Prime yet, other than the fact the trailers fully failed to catch my interest and everything in there honestly looked really ugly and oddly stretchy, is basically because Sonic allegedly is presented as an OOC idiot and all his friends as needless dicks. It makes me fear watching it is going to be one big They Would Not Do That teeth-grinding endeavour, which I know I am not going to enjoy in the slightest. I had the exact same in Boom RoL, with Sonic randomly bailing his friends out of a fight they could have easily won (but clearly asking them to turn tail because he was worried)... and his friends then suddenly becoming all aggressive and accusatory when shit hit the fan despite the fact that 1. Sonic was trying to help (even if it clearly was not necessary in a more meta player sense, but still, it's nice he was worried, I suppose) and 2. Sonic could not have known he would lead the party right to Lyric, yet everyone fully blamed him for Lyric's escape anyway without taking that detail into account at all. Prime seems to be doing the same with that shattered crystal, and it truly comes off as unfair towards Sonic.

But I must say, the more people are abuzz about Prime, the more my curiosity is piqued... in a "I wonder just how bad it actually is" kind of way, but still. Now I really am heavily debating if maybe I should give it a watch after all, but I just truly don't like how it appears as if the characters got completely stripped of everything that makes them likeable and Sonic gets the short end of the stick because of it😅

And of course the fact Silver is not in it, but we can't have everything. But still :<

You nailed it lol. It's exactly that: trailers and blurbs both failed to convince me it would be a good investment of my time. I mention Boom because I felt the same way when the trailers of RoL started to drop: I watched them, thought "wow this looks very unappealing" and simply never followed its development - and this was long before it turned out to be a glitchy mess lmao.

I still have zero interest in catching up. I have watched a few clips from my friends who did subject themselves to it, and I'm sorry, but every frame simply repels me. I don't like the overly stretchy animation, Sonic has some truly cringy lines, everyone's OOC, the concept alone is just wasted IMO - I don't care about a Jungle AU or a Pirate AU! The Eggman AU could have been great, showing on-screen what Forces didn't, but nooooooo we have to have the Chaos Council 🙄 yeah thanks, that's exactly what i needed in my life, gen z eggman.

Doesn't help that the praise I keep seeing feels rather shallow, about how cute characters are (first it was Nine, now it's Apple Metal or whatever the name is) or how funny the shipteases are. And sure, nothing wrong in enjoying mindless entertainment ofc, you do you. But again, I still think I'd be wasting my time. It's not even interesting in the same way IDW sparked some interesting conversations about Sonic's personality and morals in the games. Yeah, Sonic's a dumbass here. People like him being a dumbass. Okay.

Anyway, if you want to hatewatch, I recommend doing so with a friend lol. You could both make fun of it and seriously discussing about what works and what doesn't :P

[larrietalk]

About this, the situation with Harry's team is so disappointing tbh, leaving aside all the stunts, how they are handling tour is honestly insulting, also they haven't given him a break since 2019 when FL dropped he's done Grammys, tour, Pleasing and now Coachella. There's an argument to be done here that maybe is Harry's choice, cause he's a workaholic or whatever, but his team should know anyways that overexposure is never a good thing and that he should lay low for at least a year, if the rumors are true and he's gonna drop an album next month I fear gp is gonna get tired of him and find the littlest thing to cancel him. And going back to the tour situation they are not gonna need to dig deep cause honestly holding your fans money for 2 years and never mention it again is good reason to cancel him, God knows others have been canceled for less lol. As a last thought, I wouldn't put it past Full Stop to want Harry to be canceled as some sick and twisted PR strategy honestly

Oh, are we going to talk hshq? Because we can go all day lmao.

Harry's team is a bunch of nepo kids who got everything handed to them on a silver plate and rely on their connections, Harry's name and bare minimum to get by. They created the illusion of being Harry's saviors, when in reality, they would be nothing without him. Their laziness and conceit have been more visible in the past year especially and I don't think they expected the harries to start turning on them too. Glenne literally deleted her twitter account after she got ratioed one (!) time and Jeff only updated on the tour for America after people called him out in the replies.

The tour situation has been insulting to every fan and when it comes to merch, it's not better. They have been keeping their fans' money hostage for MONTHS or in tour's case YEARS, lowkey bordering on theft now, considering fans cannot get any update on what's happening to their money despite begging for it. They don't know any other way to promote Harry if they're not unnecessarily pushing his het image and I can already feel hs3 promo will be a mess. And the worst thing is, they know that in press, it will all fall down on Harry's back, as nobody cares about Jeff the manager, despite him desperately trying to make himself relevant.

As for the workaholic argument, see, in my eyes, Harry is doing exactly what he was doing in One Direction - working constantly and never having a break, but back then no one was calling him a workaholic and they were 5 boys. Now he is one person who didn't get to have a break since 2019 and I'm not sure hshq ever wanted to assure his longevity - they are 1dhq on steroids, milking Harry dry while they still can (can we talk about how they dropped Pleasing and just expected people to buy it? Their accounts haven't posted since December) and I don't expect them to manage any crisis since those geniuses were all in for holivia and we all know what that trash is doing to Harry's image right now.

I wish he could just disappear for a year but with what we already know 2022 has in store, welp, good luck to us and him.

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 277: Go Go Child Soldiers

Previously on BnHA: Horikoshi was all “hey guys I’m going to kill off Aizawa” and we were like “no you’re not” and he was like “watch me, I’m really gonna do it!!” and we were all “DO NOT” and he was all “okay okay geez.” I don’t know if he thinks he’s being cute or what, but we will probably have to have a little talk after this. Anyway, so other stuff that happened included the obligatory news copter showing up to record the carnage so that All Might and Eri can watch; Tomura activating some Approximately High End Noumus to serve as cannon fodder to distract all the hero extras; and Gran dropping off Kacchan and Deku a little ways away from the battle and being all “stay here”, which was IMMEDIATELY and PROFOUNDLY ignored as they just FLEW RIGHT BACK OVER TO THE BATTLE anyway to save Aizawa. Yep. Kacchan really wants to lose that quirk.

Today on BnHA: Tomura, Deku, Kacchan, and Endeavor all take turns flinging each other into the ground and launching fire and explosions and stuff, all of which is impressively violent and doesn’t really get anything accomplished. The grown-ups all collectively decide to shrug off Deku and Kacchan joining in on the fight as though they’re teenagers sneaking into an R-rated film as opposed to CHILDREN on a BATTLEFIELD, and I can’t help but feel like this very nonchalant decision will have some serious consequences! Tomura has a moment of self-awareness in which he’s all “is AFO possessing me lol” before deciding “NAH THAT CAN’T POSSIBLY BE TRUE” which, haha, okay. The chapter then ends with Mt. Lady unsettlingly taking on Gigantomachia ALL BY HERSELF??! which seems like a REALLY TERRIBLE IDEA?? and had better not result in anything bad happening to her though or I SWEAR TO GOD.

ooooooooh!

preview of the final battle, anyone? and I feel like this panel is deliberately drawn to resemble All Might and AFO’s iconic battle at Kamino as well, which ramps up the intensity all the more. very nice

and shout out to Aizawa for making this moment possible with his quirk! I have to assume this isn’t something we’re gonna get the chance to see too often moving forward, unless he decides to chaperone all future battles from here on out, which would be good for the kids but also very stressful for me

anyways, so... lol

it really is almost as though Gran asked them this question and then Deku was like “OOH! I KNOW!” and then just leaped into action to demonstrate. “this!! him getting ahold of me, right?? this would be so much worse.” good job Deku

although

he’s not wrong, though. dammit. I mean, I’ve already tacitly endorsed their involvement by approving of them saving Aizawa’s life. you know, for that brief span of time after Aizawa showed up and before we knew how powerful Tomura would still be even without his quirks, I really thought that Aizawa losing his own quirk was all but an inevitability. now, though, it kinda feels like they absolutely wouldn’t stand a chance without him?? hahaha

honestly it’s a little uncomfortable to think about the fact that the Child Soldiers That We All Agree Should Under No Circumstances Be A Part Of This War have so far a) saved Hawks’s life and b) now saved Aizawa’s, and by extension c) saved the entire world. I mean but don’t get me wrong, you still won’t see me writing the HPSC any thank you cards any time soon

anyway now that I’ve said all that, watch Aizawa just immediately lose his fucking quirk right afterwards though. WE’LL SEE

...sigh

why is every last one of the pros so utterly goddamn useless. sorry, was that a bit harsh. I’ll try to phrase it more gently. what I meant to say was, why is every single non-Mirko adult person on this mission about as useful as a RoseArt crayon. why do they all SUCK so HARD. why are they BAD. bad!! they’re just bad!!!

anyways but back to Deku

I’m torn between SOBBING FREELY at this and banging my head against a wall lmao. help please my green son is so loving and brave and so tremendously stupid, just

this is true! and by the way though Deku, just remind me again, I spaced it out just now, what was the reason Tomura was out here to get ambushed by Aizawa and the others in the first place? he was after... something? one for... the road? one for the money? one flew over the cuckoo’s nest?? damn what was it

damn it Aizawa stop dumping your feels in the middle of my sarcastic rants

bro. I know, right?? listen I’m proud of him too don’t get me wrong! the unfortunate thing is though that right now he’s not just your student; he’s also -- and it’s not your fault you don’t know this yet though -- The Thing That Tomura Wants Right Now, On A Silver Platter. so yeah. hence why I am concerned

oop no time to talk though cuz my boys are doing a ~*~COMBO THING~*~ ooooooooh yeahhhhhhh

look at that. “okay Deku you just hold him there and try not to get shot.” truly dazzling teamwork there

LISTEN, YOU!!

THE DISRESPECT?? ooh man and look at his face. this is the happy reunion I’ve been waiting oh my god oh my god

LOL

YEAH HE CAN DO THAT NOW HAHA. while you were off getting all transcendent he was mastering his BLOOP now what huh take that

...sob he’s just yanking Deku along behind him as if he weighs nothing. it’s like that one fancomic of the entire Bakusquad trying to stop an angry Kirishima --

-- HOLY SHIT I SAID “WHOA” ALOUD

MEEP THAT’S CLOSE. whew. okay. breathe. breathe

OH IT’S YOU AGAIN

you guys, is it just me or has this entire battle so far just been one long loop of -> Deku tries to fight Tomura -> Kacchan goes with -> Kacchan almost dies -> an adult intervenes at the last possible second -> Endeavor tries to fight Tomura -> Endeavor almost dies -> Deku tries to fight Tomura -> repeat ad infinitum

anyway so Tomura’s actually going flying into the ground now. that probably came within a hair’s breath of actually nearly almost mildly hurting him! way to go guys keep it up!

and Endeavor’s now echoing a question which many fans have been asking these last few weeks, “where’s Shouto?” where indeed. off somewhere not being a dumbass like these two, one hopes. maybe sticking his arm down some Not Quite High Ends’ throats and making them hibernate

lord help us Tomura’s actually stopped fighting for two seconds to monologue. is this good or bad??

is this a deliberate tactic? are you trying to buy time?? I don’t like this lol. why did they stop fighting you now that they’ve finally almost sort of got an edge on you

wow we’re really just... letting the kids fight, huh

just letting them be right there in formation with Endeavor. no one stops to think “are there any actual adult people we could try and swap out in place of these two high school freshmen?” because they already know the answer is “no there are not” SIGH

EVEN AIZAWA OMG

AND WHAT HAPPENS AFTER THAT?? “la la la we’re not gonna think about it.” goddammit I liked it when you guys were at least trying to pretend like the sixteen-year-olds shouldn’t be here fdslkfjlk

anyway. for what it’s worth, at least we’ve got the only three people in the world who ever tried to surpass All Might standing up here ready to take on the guy whose strength and toughness is approximately the same as his. that’s something. I guess this really is our best shot

YES WE GET IT

“I GUESS IT CAN’T BE HELPED” should be the goddamn chapter title. either that or “SHRUG, CHILD SOLDIERS, I GUESS!!!”

anyway so he’s telling Deku and Kacchan not to ask for direction in one breath, and then giving them orders right away with the next

djsalfkj. welp. you heard him Kacchan. guard Deku no matter what. this will definitely end well

KLDSKFLKSHG MEANWHILE!!!

DON’T MIND HIM HE’S JUST POSSESSED BY A LITTLE BIT OF AFO-SOUL. NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT

oh man he actually looks freaked out??!

like he has no idea what happened just now. I’m sorry, up until this point were you thinking that having echo-y “wooooo... One for All... go get it~~” voices inside your head was perfectly normal?? lol boy he’s been playing you this whole time and he’s still playing you. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU IGNORE YOUR DEAD FAMILY’S EERIE DREAM WARNINGS. YOU GET POSSESSED

meanwhile!! both Deku and Tomura reacting at the same time! DO YOU BELIEVE ME THAT THEY SHARE A MENTAL LINK YET. hmm hmm hmm anyway

so now Tomura is straight up in denial!

sadly I’m growing more and more convinced that he’s wrong on all three accounts there. you may think it’s your power and your body...

and wait though, because this is the first time that the idea of him not being in control of his body has actually been brought up, isn’t it? so that’s a nice big red flag there! up until now the argument could be made that even if AFO’s will is manipulating Tomura from behind the scenes and influencing his decisions, there was nothing to indicate that AFO could potentially take over his entire body. but now that Tomura has brought it up as a possibility -- even if he’s in denial about it -- I’d say it’s not only possible, but extremely likely! so that’s a nice big thing looming on the horizon there

and it also in turn gives us a potential solution to the question of “how can this battle possibly end without all of the heroes dying and/or Tomura losing?” because one has to assume that Aizawa’s quirk is going to be taken out of the picture at some point, whether it’s because of him blinking at the wrong time or being shot with a bullet or what. at which point Tomura would basically become unstoppable again and be free to just destroy everything like he wants. but now this introduces the possibility of him potentially taking himself out of the picture for the time being. like if he realizes that he’s in danger of being outright possessed, I could see him leaving them for now and running off to go wage mental war with himself for a while, giving the heroes some time to regroup and lick their wounds. so that’s interesting to think about

holy shit!!

okay so just a couple of things I want to take note of here before we read on

“I don’t want to become like you” -- I think we can take this as confirmation that Tomura will fight against AFO if and when he realizes he’s being manipulated. his loyalty to him isn’t completely blind. so that could have some potentially huge implications moving forward

this image of Tomura being on the inside of AFO’s body, in what looks to be the same mental landscape from chapter 270, though. ...yeah. just who is really in charge, here

anyway so his next thought on page 11 is “I want to be even greater than you”, echoing Deku (and Kacchan’s) desire to be even greater than All Might, which is yet another nice parallel between them

and he’s basically telling the AFO voice inside him to shut up now, as if it will actually listen

yep. you want to go after One for All for your own deeply personal reasons. not following your master’s whims at all, nope. you are your own man

so now finally Gran is getting in on the action!

no idea why he want after the arm though. as if a broken arm ever stopped anyone in this fucking manga

OOOH NANA NAME DROP

???? um??? your dead grandma??? remember???!! don’t tell me you don’t at least recognize your own fucking last name there?? that is significant and don’t try to tell me otherwise! and in a chapter about you being rebellious and trying to defy AFO’s will, besides!!

holy shit

1. THE GRAN/TOSHINORI FATHER/SON FEELS I WASN’T READY!!, and 2. HOLY SHIT THIS OLD MAN IS RIPPED, THOUGH

AND HERE COMES ENDEAVOR NOW TO RUIN EVERYTHING SOMEHOW, PROBABLY

I DON’T KNOW WHAT THAT FACE MEANS BUT IT SURE AS HELL ISN’T A GOOD FACE I CAN TELL YOU THAT

OH NO SOMEHOW DEKU GOT INVOLVED AGAIN LOL

DIDN’T I TELL YOU IT WAS A NEVERENDING LOOP OF A FIGHT. SO NEXT UP IS KACCHAN JOINING IN AND THEN ALMOST DYING AGAIN

OH MY GOD

NEVER. ENDING. LOOP oh god oh god. next time don’t loudly shout “HE’S JUST THE BAIT” before launching your surprise attack you dingus!!

HOLY MOLY

OKAY BUT

I don’t know about you but I am hella impressed that he managed a blast like that without blowing his own fucking arm off

with the exception of that one time he got all excited and tried to vaporize Todoroki during the sports festival, we have almost never seen Katsuki go all out against anyone, and the possibility that we might be about to see it now is THRILLING. I AM THRILLED

NOW WE’RE CUTTING TO ENDEAVOR AND HE’S FLASHING BACK TO THE SHORT SPEECH ALL MIGHT GAVE HIM WAY BACK WHEN ABOUT THEM BEING DIFFERENT AND ABOUT HOW ENDEAVOR SHOULD FIND HIS OWN PATH RATHER THAN TRYING TO BE THE SAME KIND OF SYMBOL AS ALL MIGHT. AND I DON’T KNOW WHAT THE SIGNIFICANCE OF THIS IS OR WHY IT’S BEING BROUGHT UP NOW BUT OH GOLLY!

(ETA: I guess it might be because Endeavor -- unlike All Might -- isn’t facing Tomura alone but is working together with the kids to do this combo? like it’s a teamwork thing? I don’t really know lol I’ll think on it some more.)

LOL WHAT

WHAT IS HAPPENING. lol everything is either being exploded or on fire

KFFLSLLK “MEANWHILE”?????

OH NO OH GOD

SIGHING OUT LOUD AGAIN!! not because I’m disappointed to cut away from the Kacchan Loses His Quirk Battle (in due time!!), but because this means that yet again I’m going to have to spend a chapter worrying about Horikoshi killing off one of the TWELVE remaining living female pro hero characters he has, of which one is a healer, another is retired and working as a secretary, yet another only seems to do TV commercials, yet another another currently has... I want to say two limbs?? but I’m not even sure anymore, and lastly two more yet anothers are currently WHEREABOUTS UNKNOWN and MAY ALREADY BE DEAD. so if you’re counting, that’s a full HALF of what was already maybe only a fifth of the total pro hero population in general

all of which is to say that IF YOU SO MUCH AS LAY A FINGER ON MT. LADY I WILL FUCKING END YOU HORIKOSHI. we are NOT HAVING THAT. you hear me?? YOU CAN’T SPEND ALL OF YOUR FREE TIME DRAWING MIRKO ALL OVER THE PLACE AND BEING ALL “I FUCKING LOVE GIRL POWER” ONLY TO GO AND BE ALL “OH BUT I KILLED MT. LADY THOUGH WHOOPS”!! DO YOU HEAR ME?? THIS AIN’T IT

sigh. and yet why do I have a very bad feeling about this. hopefully I’m just overreacting. please don’t sully this amazing arc!! MANGA GODS, I OFFER YOU THIS PRAYER

[shijiujun]

“you know you’re singing to your headphones out loud, right” au for moshang plz sqh singing modern songs that mbj doesn't know and being hella confused 🥺

Featuring karaoke-loving Shang Qinghua who gets a bit too drunk at a Cang Qiong mountain gathering, and he goes all out. 

Or when Mobei Jun wonders why Shang Qinghua is singing about another man called Liang Shan Bo.

---

Sometimes, he thinks about his old life before he ever had the misfortune of landing in a world of his own creation, with an annoying gaming AI system of sorts hounding his every move (in the beginning) or turning up at the most inopportune times just when he thinks it’s finally gone and left him alone (more recently). 

Shang Qinghua remembers not having many friends when he was still Shang Qinghua, when ‘向天打飞机 Airplane Shooting Towards the Sky’ was still merely his writing Weibo account moniker and when he had millions of people looking up to him for his crucial contributions in writing this amazing story about his son Luo Binghe and the way he overcame all odds to become a success with a harem of gorgeous women at his feet (damn you, Peerless Cucumber bro!).

Back in those days, he lived off cup noodles and instant coffee. If he didn’t have to leave the house, Shang Qinghua would simply curl up in front of his laptop, either writing for his novel or watching shows (clears his throat) - actual shows! Chinese period dramas were his favourite, where a skilled and intelligent consort in the harem would outwit all the other women to be with her one true love, the Emperor, who falls irrevocably in love with her.

And when he got bored, he switched from the laptop to his television to engage in his second most favourite hobby - Chinese karaoke. Going out to a karaoke bar would require some level of socializing, and also a few friends so he gets more bang out of his buck from what he pays for the room, but at home? 

With advanced technology and a tiny ass microphone in either shining gold or silver, Shang Qinghua’s home entertainment system was his very own personal karaoke room, His tiny mic even had that echo-y effect on.

Shang Qinghua has a thing for classic Chinese songs - ‘The New Butterfly Dream’, ‘Liang Shan Bo and Juliet’, The Moon Represents My Heart‘ - and contemporary karaoke must-haves, like Wang Fei. For an embarrassing few days, the Chinese version of Baby Shark was a veritable earworm as well.

After transmigrating into his own story set in ancient times, where he lives without technology, Shang Qinghua would be lying if he said he didn’t miss the Internet. Laptops would be incredibly handy, and so would switches for lights, definitely indoor plumbing for toilets, and induction stoves. Phones too, that would be nice, rather than having to ‘send word’ with letters. 

Of course, there is no karaoke bar or machine for him.

Not all is bad though. At least he transmigrated to Shang Qinghua in this world as a baby, so it’s not as if he was surviving on Internet and technology one day and left to do everything manually the next day since someone was always taking care of him. Peerless Cucumber bro, of course, wasn’t as lucky, but the man has definitely taken to this world (and his son!!) like a fish to water.

And as for himself, Shang Qinghua does not need to envy Shen Qingqiu and Luo Binghe either, because somehow, he has gotten the man of his dreams too, even if said man was a little cruel and rude to him in the beginning.

He has the love of his life (coughs coughs) and they’re stuck in this world for the rest of his life. What more is there to want? Not to mention how his cup of instant noodles betrayed him at the last moment, resulting in his death! It is slightly safer, ironically, to be in this world instead.

All is good except... well...

===

Shen Qingqiu marvels at the sight before him, torn between wanting to step in to stop Shang Qinghua, or watch this farce unfold. 

He sometimes forgets where he, or where Shang Qinghua, who has been in this world longer than he, came from. They don’t always talk about the past when they meet, and aside from the occasional meetups, Shen Yuan is a part of him that doesn’t surface, not when he is with Luo Binghe. 

Shang Qinghua, on the other hand, grew up here, and aside from referring to Shen Qingqiu by his Weibo account name, he seems otherwise well-adjusted, no hint of modern online writer Shang Qinghua in sight. It doesn’t feel as if he misses their original world either.

This evening, however, memories of modern times slap him in the face, quite literally.

“Shizun!” Luo Binghe calls, frantic, tugging him back into his embrace out of Shang Qinghua’s way. Once Shen Qingqiu is safe in his arms, his eyes narrow at the bumbling, drunk idiot causing a scene in the dinner hall, “Shang Qinghua...”

Shang Qinghua stops where he is, and then before any one can stop him, he picks up a pair of chopsticks, brings it to his mouth, and begins bellowing his way through-

-Jay Chou’s Hair Like Snow.

“Shizun, are you alright?” Luo Binghe fusses, his hands coming up to cup Shen Qingqiu’s face when his Shizun doesn’t so much as respond to him. “Were you hurt? Did he hurt you? How’re you feeling? We’ll go back home now-”

“What is he singing?” Qi Qingqi frowns in disgust.

They all wince when Shang Qinghua attempts to hit a high note, but fails miserably.

Fuck me, Shen Qingqiu thinks, his eyes impossibly wide, who knew Airplane bro was such a karaoke fanatic?

“... maybe he is possessed by a malevolent spirit? Or perhaps this is an unidentified curse?” asks Ming Fan. 

“Or is this some new form of cultivation?” asks Ning Yingying, curious.

Yue Qingyuan, seated at the front of the dining hall, cannot help but be concerned for him as well. “Shall we call Mu-shidi to take a look at him-”

They’ve gathered for their annual meeting - a condition that Yue Qingyuan has set in place a few years ago after Luo Binghe ‘stole’ (married!) him away from Cang Qiong Peak - and although Shang Qinghua said he didn’t mind that Mobei Jun was unable to accompany him today, he spent most of the dinner drinking alcohol while in a melancholic state instead.

Who knew that Shang Qinghua was a singing drunk?!

Hence their current predicament.

At the Sect Master’s words, Shang Qinghua suddenly turns around and looks at Shen Qingqiu. HIccuping twice, he then beams, “Cucumber-”

Shen Qingqiu has never moved that fast in his life. Within a fraction of a second, he has his hand pressed over Shang Qinghua’s mouth, holding onto him from the back.

“Cucumber?” everyone choruses in confusion.

“I believe your Shang-shishu has had a little too much to drink,” Shen Qingqiu clears his throat, nodding at everyone else. “We should... send him back to Mobei. Isn’t that right, Binghe?”

His disciple, his husband, still has on an affronted, murderous look for how Shang Qinghua almost brained Shen Qingqiu with his flailing arms in his drunken fit. The moment Shen Qingqiu asks, however, his expression morphs into something so soft and full of love that everyone who sees it chokes.

“Of course,” Luo Binghe smiles, devotion apparent in his eyes. “Anything Shizun wants.”

===

The words that are tumbling out of Shang Qinghua’s mouth are entirely incomprehensible, and so are the tunes he’s humming into his ear.

Mobei Jun thought he had gotten used to Shang Qinghua’s eccentric mannerisms, and also thought he knew everything about his husband, so many years later. Shang Qinghua is mumbling Chinese alright, but none of the characters put together make any sense.

Who is Liang Shan Bo? And who the hell is Juliet?!

His mood taking a turn for the worse, Mobei Jun hoists Shang Qinghua up further on his back.

After getting so drunk, the idiot had the gall to demand for a piggy-back from the throne room to their bedroom. Mobei Jun has never once suffered such indignity in his years of living. A bridal carry? Of course, anytime. A piggy-back? As if he was some beast to be tamed? 

Well this definitely has to be a first.

While he was stewing in his thoughts, Shang Qinghua switches from that song to another one, and a stream of ‘du du du lu du lu’ emerges from his lips... AND something about... a sha yu? What the hell is that?!

Shang Qinghua lazily lifts his right hand as they approach their room, balls it into a fist and puts it to his mouth, as if he’s holding something, and whatever monstrosity Shang Qinghua is singing, his voice gets even louder.

Mobei Jun tosses Shang Qinghua off his back unceremoniously and onto the soft bed. Interrupted, Shang Qinghua blinks, his vision blurry, and is about to catch his breath and start singing again when his husband climbs in after him. Trapping Shang Qinghua with his entire weight, Mobei Jun seals his lips with a kiss.

“... My king...” Shang Qinghua murmurs in a daze, when Mobei Jun pulls back a few minutes later, his breaths coming out as short, harsh pants. “My king...”

“That’s right,” he says with a glower. “I’m your Da Wang, your husband.”

Mobei Jun doesn’t know who Liang Shan Bo is, but he’s going to make sure no other man’s name ever leaves Shang Qinghua’s lips again when they’re together.

And when his husband finally sobers up, he’s going to have a lot to answer for.

---

Songs Mentioned (YouTube Links in Comments):

The New Butterfly Dream 新鸳鸯蝴蝶梦 － A Chinese classic, sung by Huang An but done beautifully by legendary god of singing Fei Yu Qing and singing partner for the song A Yun Ga

Liang Shan Bo and Juliet 梁山伯与朱丽叶 － A Taiwanese contemporary classic of sorts by Genie Zhuo, most Chinese millennials would definitely have sang this at a karaoke once in their lives - Song is inspired by Liang Shan Bo and Zhu Ying Tai, the Chinese version of Romeo and Juliet to some extent - They both die in the end and become butterflies, so they’re also called the Butterfly Lovers.

The Moon Represents My Heart 月亮代表我的心 － ANOTHER CLASSIC CLASSIC!!!

Baby Shark (Chi. Ver) － ˆThe baby shark hype did move to China, and it’s pretty hilarious LMAO and in Chinese, shark is 鲨鱼 (sha yu) but I’m assuming that in this world, there isn’t a shark kind of animal of sorts? So Mobei Jun and everyone else except SQQ wouldn’t know what a shark is or looks like?!

Hair Like Snow 发如雪 － By Jay Chou, another classic that all Chinese millennials would have sang in a karaoke bar 

Wang Fei 王妃 － Jam Hsiao’s version is known best, and it’s pretty epic, not that anyone can reach any of the high notes in the chorus, but does that stop us from trying?!! Hell no!!!

---

Notes: My first Moshang?!! That didn’t really have a lot of Moshang time?! But thanks anon, hope this sort of works?!

[purplesurveys]

1274

Department One: Apparel And Jewelry

What are you wearing today?  Just a white duster dress. Very loungewear-y, hahaha. I didn’t feel like wearing shorts today.

What does your favorite shirt look like?  At the moment I’m obsessed with my Vante shirt. It’s fanmade but it was made tastefully; the designs aren’t too loud and I love the cute little shoutouts and tributes to his past paintings, so it had been a ridiculously easy decision for me to want to buy it.

What kind of underwear do you prefer wearing?  Eh I don’t really have a preference as long as I don’t find them uncomfy.

What are your favorite kind of jeans?  I’m definitely still stuck in my mom jeans phase. Idk man, I just love how they match nearly all kinds of tops.

What do the last pair of shoes you wore look like?  They were adidas sneakers. Not a big fan of chunky shoes but it’s an Ivy Park and it was on a big discount HAHAHA so I didn’t hesitate to get them.

How many shoes do you own?  A little more than 10. I love shoes and wanna collect them someday...just not today, hahaha.

How much jewelry do you own?  Not too big on jewelry; most, if not all the ones I wear are just borrowed from my mom since we share the same style anyway.

Do you own any real diamonds or other expensive jewelry?  Yeah, the ones I would borrow from my mom are pretty pricey.

Has anyone ever gave you jewelry as a present?  Yes, I received rings and necklaces from my ex. One of my aunts also gave me a necklace when I turned 7.

Do you like diamonds or gemstones better?  I just stick with diamonds...which is...also a gemstone too, if I’m not mistaken.

Silver or gold?  Silver.

Department Two: Electronics

Do you have a DVD player in your car?  Not in mine, but we do have one in the family car. I used to watch movies on there often but after one grueling road trip where my motion sickness acted up, I haven’t wanted to use it since.

If you have one, what does your camera/camcorder look like?  I just use the camera in my phone but back in the day I used to have a DSLR; that was when I thought I wanted to take up photography, heh. It was a Nikon D3100.

How much did it cost?  I’m not sure since my dad gave it to me as a present, but a quick search told me it would’ve cost him around P20,000 which issssss wow more expensive than I thought.

What kind of cellphone do you have?  I have an iPhone 8 with an LCD screen that’s deteriorating by the day HAHA. I really need to get a new phone.

How often do you send texts?  I text just for work purposes now, so it really depends on how busy my accounts are. Some days would require me to send out more texts than usual.

Do you have your own computer or does your family share?  I have my own laptop. My workplace also provided me with what’s supposed to be my work laptop, but they had it sent to me when I was already a couple of months into my job and all my needed files and programs were already in my personal laptop. Since I was too lazy to start everything all over again, I’ve never actually used the work laptop haha.

How many computers are in your house?  We have three laptops in total - my siblings and I each have our own. Kind of a necessity these days.

Do you still have a VCR?  I don’t think so.

How many DVDs do you own?  We probably have around 30-50 but most of them are movies from like the 2000s that we just haven’t thrown out. Personally, I have about five DVDs of old films like Gone with the Wind, Rebel Without A Cause, Breakfast at Tiffany’s, etc, and recently I’ve been buying BTS merch so DVDs are part of that mix too.

Does your car have a GPS?  No. I use Waze on my phone instead.

What kind of iPod/MP3 player do you have? Haven’t used an iPod in like a literal decade. I use Spotify for my music.

How many songs are on it?  Spotify doesn’t work that way since it’s technically a database of songs.

What size is your TV?  Never bothered to ask/check.

How many TVs are in your house?  Four. Living room, dining room, master bedroom, my brother’s room.

What video game systems do you have?  We have a PS3 and PS4. 

What about handhelds?  Switch. I believe my sister also still has her DSi stored somewhere.

How many video games do you have?  Probably somewhere around 50-60. My dad and brother are content with repeating their games lol.

Department Three: Home

What kind of shampoo do you use?  It’s a Dove variant but I’m just blanking out on the specific name/what it does.

Soap or shower gel?  Shower gel.

What does your comforter look like?  It’s pretty colorful and has geometric shapes and lines.

Does it match your pillows?  Yep, they come in a set.

What size is your bed?  Twin.

Do you or your parents like to decorate the house with various things or is it plain?  My mom puts considerable effort in decorating the house but it’s nothing overboard that it feels tacky. There’s enough decor in enough spaces.

Does the furniture in your house match?  Sure. I imagine my mom would be very irritated if she felt something was uncoordinated at home.

What does your couch look like?  It’s a gray L-shaped couch. Gabie broke a portion of the couch’s springs when it had only spent its like first two weeks at home but surprisingly my mom has not noticed it yet; probably because she barely sits on that side.

How many does your dining room/kitchen table seat?  It has six chairs, though since we’re five one of the chairs is almost always unoccupied.

Do you have any fancy china?  No, my mom isn’t the type to collect those.

Do you have outside furniture?  Yeah we have a table and chairs up on the rooftop, if they count.

What do your curtains look like?  My siblings and I have pull-down blinds. The other rooms have these pulled-back gold curtains that’s accompanied by white sheers.

Department Four: Grocery

What kind of bread do you get?  Sliced white bread, always. Sometimes my mom will pick up pan de sal, but she gets those from a certain bakery and no longer the grocery.

What is your favorite kind of cake?  CHEEEEEEEEEESECAAAAAAAKE.

Do you get a lot of sweets from the grocery store?  Eh, nah. Not a big fan of sweets.

What kind of soda is your favorite?  Don’t like soda.

Do you drink juice? What kind?  I can take it or leave it. I wouldn’t buy it for myself.

What is your favorite chewing gum?  Doesn’t matter to me. The flavors last for only like a minute anyway.

Do you usually get candy from the check-out aisle?  Nah. Those are far more accessible so who knows who could’ve touched or tampered with them. Plus, I mentioned I don’t like sweets.

What is your favorite soup?  Miso or cream of mushroom.

Have you ever had soup when you were sick?  No. I don’t enjoy hot beverages/liquids very much so I doubt I would feel comfort from soup when I’m sick.

What are your favorite canned vegetables?  Not sure if it’s a cultural difference thing but canned vegetables kind of sound gross and I don’t think I’ve encountered those (I actually had to look it up lol). My parents always buy fruits and veggies as is.

What do you eat for breakfast?  Fried rice is a constant but my mom switches up the set of viands every time. Some of the meals she serves would be hotdogs, eggs (either scrambled, omelette, fried, or sunny-side up), corned beef, dried fish, hashbrowns, luncheon meat, tapa, and Vienna sausages. Poptarts or toaster strudels?  Poptarts. I’ve never had toaster strudel and I’m honestly not sure what that is.

What salad dressing do you prefer?  Spicy mayo.

Ketchup, mayonnaise, or mustard?  MAYONNAISE. I can live without the other two.

What kind of cookie do you like best?  I only ever eat chocolate chip.

What kind of snacks do you get at the grocery store?  Salted egg chips or Pringles. Not a big fan of snacks either. This survey is making me realize I’m way more into full meals than anything else.

Do you get the meat from the deli?  Er, we don’t have delis here. Too fancy a concept lmao. If we have them, they are most likely in those extremely upscale, boujee neighborhoods.

What is your favorite frozen dinner?  I mean my dad buys frozen meat, fish, etc, but the frozen dinner sets that I see in American culture, which I’m guessing is what’s being referred to in this question, are not common here.

Do you prefer frozen dinners to actual cooking?  I honestly can’t imagine how it’s filling, but then again I’ve never tried it. Personally, food made from scratch is still the best.

What is your favorite kind of pasta?  Fettuccine.

Do you eat meat? And if not, do you eat vegetarian meat?  Yes, I eat meat. I get vegan options if they’re accessible and affordable, but those choices are hard to come by here.

What is your favorite fruit?  Avocado is really the only one I’ll give a pass to. Everything else tastes horrible.

What about vegetable?  Broccoli, bell peppers, green beans.

Department Five: Health And Beauty

What kind of makeup do you normally use?  None. If I absolutely have to put on makeup, I will begrudgingly put on foundation, maybe some eyeliner, and lip gloss. And they will all most likely be borrowed from my sister.

Do you wear more makeup on special events?  Not necessarily.

What is your favorite makeup brand?  I wouldn’t be the right person to ask because I would just say none of them.

Do you use any acne products?  Mmm no, I just splash water on my face, really. I actually got into a conversation about skincare with my co-workers yesterday and besides the usual shocked experessions I get when people find out I don’t use products, they recommended I at least get moisturizer and sunscreen. Idk, let’s see but historically it’s been hard to convince me to invest in skincare haha.

What kind of perfume do you use?  I have one of Beyoncé’s perfumes, Heat Rush. I don’t actually know if that’s still in production but it’s been my staple for like a decade or so now.

Have you ever been on a diet?  No. I never really had to be on one.

What products do you use in your hair?  Shampoo and conditioner.

How often do you brush your hair?  Only when I have to leave the house or have an important virtual work meeting.

What do you take when you have an upset stomach?  Nothing. The toilet usually solves that for me lol.

Do you take any prescription medicine? Nope.

Department Six: Movies, Music, And Books

What is your favorite movie of all time?  It’s been Two for the Road for a solid nine years and it doesn’t look like anything’s on its way to dethroning it anytime soon.

What genre of movie do like best?  Drama. The more realistic it is, the better.

What was the last movie you watched?  It’s a Korean film called Be With You. I liked it and I cried waterfalls, but the ending was so rushed it was kind of disappointing.

What was the last movie you purchased?  I don’t buy movies. If I wanted to see a film I’ll check if Netflix has it, then if they don’t I just try to scour one of those illegal movie streaming sites that always happen to have thousands of pornographic ads hahaha.

What is your all time favorite band? Paramore. Do you still buy CDs?  Only from artists I’m an extremely huge fan of. Right now that would be BTS, so I’m catching up on all the albums they’ve released in the last eight years.

What was the last CD you bought?  I got the Butter album set, if that counts. If it doesn’t, the last full-length album I purchased was Dark & Wild.

What was the last song you listened to?  I think it was Permission To Dance.

What is your favorite book?  I haven’t found it yet.

Do you even like reading?  I used to love it a lot more, to the point that back in grade school I was known as always having a book in my hand. I just don’t know where that passion went.

How often do you read?  Nearly never. I mean...I do read fanfics, I guess; but I won’t count those.

Department Seven: Sports And Fitness

Do you own a bike/scooter/skateboard/etc.?  We do have a bike at home, but that doesn’t mean I know how to ride it. We don’t have the other two.

How old were you when you learned to ride a bike w/o training wheels?  I still don’t know how to last on a bike without training wheels heheh.

Have you ever been camping?  Nah.

How often do you work out?  Nope but at work my boss just started another fitness challenge, so I’ll probably have to get back on working out soon just because I would want to accomplish the challenge.

Are you in good shape?  Sure, I think so. I’m not like fit fit because I neveeer exercise haha, but I also don’t make it a point to constantly eat unhealthy foods or have an unhealthy lifestyle to the point that it affects my body.

Do you go to a gym?  I do not. I thought of getting a membership at the start of the year but I’m glad I didn’t push through with it because all the gyms are still closed anyway.

Have you ever been fishing?  No. Idk if it’s my kind of pastime or not.

Have you ever been on a boat?  Yeah. My country has like 7000 islands so I was bound to get on a boat at some point in my life haha.

Can you play golf?  Never seemed interesting to me so no. Even on Wii Sports I barely picked golf.

Ever rode on a golf cart?  Yeah, in resorts where we had to ride them to be taken to our room.

Would you ever go hunting?  That’s an easy no.

What is your favorite sport?  Pro wrestling or table tennis.

Ever played on a sports team?  No, my school didn’t have a table tennis varsity.

Department Eight: Toys

What was your favorite toy as a child?  Cash registers because I liked the buttons. Also Play-Doh sets that had those contraptions that would squirt out the clay in various shapes.

Do you still play with toys?  Well, no.

Do you collect any toys?  I don’t, but I’m not opposed to start buying Funko Pop figurines of people or characters I’m interested in.

Did you ever have building blocks?  Sure, but I was never creative enough for them.

Did you play with dolls?  No.

Barbies or Bratz? Which were better?  BRATZZZZZZ

What is your favorite board game?  Scrabble.

Do you like to do arts and crafts?  Hell no.

Do you think that kids now have it better than when you were young? For sure, but isn’t that kind of the goal?

[silverselfshippingchaos]

[dorky-self-shipper] 🎫 here’s a gush pass :3 feel free to gush about whichever f/o you want, however much you want, then send this ask to 3 other selfshippers

Oh, my friend!!! Ahhh thank you so much for sending this in!! I have been a bit iffy because some things in my life have been piling up, but!!! I am so excited to dig into this!!! I really need a good gushing session haha!

Today's target for gushing hours with your girl Ash is none other than Yaag Rosch!

This ended up being pretty long, and is a mix of lore, screaming, keyboard smashes, his gorgeous design, and more screaming.

Saying that this man lives in my head rent free is an understatement. He is all I think about it. Honestly, I think it's funny considering Yaag's role in FF13. He's only around in the first game, and shows up in like five cutscenes.

Also. We get crumbs of him in the novels. More on that later. Back to the game.

All he does is "hey yall suck" "your lives don't matter" "uhh i need to kill you guys" "oh wait no i'm not evil" "*dies*"

But!!! He's very cool!! His character is so interesting to me. He's so driven to do whatever it takes, but beneath his actions, there's always an edge of hesitation. He seems like he comes off as so sure of himself, but... I'm not sure about that. Now, I can't say anything for sure because the writers hate him, I really liked those few moments where we get to see his actual thoughts.

For example, "Do you think we want to Purge our own people?!" And things like that where you see him question his orders. I feel like there's a lot of underlying hatred, distrust, and overall fear of the system.

Also, his development from "They aren't people, they're targets." to "I'll trust in your humanity." Gets me every single time.

Also don't get me started on his "if this is my punishment... i accept it." when he's bleeding line.

I am here to gush, not analyze. But both are happening anyway.

I feel as though he puts a lot of thought into what he says and how he acts, and I really do admire that.

For context, Lieutenant Colonel Yaag Rosch is this military higher-up guy. I remember seeing him for the first time and my jaw simply dropping. I know that these games have a history with hot villains. After all, I am an FF7 fan. I have seen the SOLDIERS, I have seen the Turks, I've seen Rufus. They're all hot.

There. I said it.

This intro scene gave us some damn good food. Like??? The silver hair??? The ponytail??? The scar on his forehead??? The overly dramatic speech about how the protagonists need to be eliminated??AJKLFNAWKJFNAWKLJFNWILEN.

(Also, I'm beginning to see the resemblance he has to Felix. I am a very predictable woman, aren't I?)

I am actually going to scream. He’s so handsome!!! His jaw!! His eyes are such a pretty color too!!! I wanna give him a kiss ahhh!! Especially on his forehead scar!!! He's so... woah.

Also, he has a really, really nice voice. Like??? WOW. I want this man to like. narrate my life. Here, lemme find some clips of him talking.

Here. Enjoy.

This one is a fan favorite as well.

It's not a Rick roll. I promise.

..... Unless?

Anyways, as time went on, I realized that he's actually such a deep and interesting character?? He gets done dirty by the writers and the game, but the potential he has makes me so excited!! There's so much material to work off of!!! Truly one of the more interesting villains the trilogy has to offer. Honestly, it's kind of difficult going through the second game knowing that he isn't there.

However, it's also difficult going through the second game because I??? Can't beat?? The goddamn boss fight??? I'm also playing on easy mode. I didn't struggle this much during the first game either. What the hell, Ash.

Back to the actual topic.

I'm gonna start off with his design before we delve into s/i lore and fun tidbits.

(His coat is so cool... Do you think he'd let me wear it? I'd probably waddle around in it because he's pretty tall and I. I am not.

He's around 6'2 (around almost 188 cm..? I think?), but take into account his boots too. Which means that normally he's slightly taller. That means that he's about a foot taller than me. That means that I'm pretty much the perfect height to bury my face in his chest. *screams*)

Talk about a kickass design. He's really cool to look at. Not only, uhm, *blushes*, but because of how cool his outfit is too! It does a really good job of portraying that "heyyy i'm super importtanntttt" energy that he has. He carries himself like he's the shit. And you know what? He is.

He's pretty professional. Minus the times he gets kinda pissed. The novels say, and I quote,

"They said he was the most straitlaced man in PSICOM - if you put serious and stubborn in a military uniform, you'd get Colonel Rosch."

And yeah. That basically sums it up.

Also, there's this scene where he gets all pissed and pulls out his sword and I'm over here like *insert debby ryan hair thing here*. I'm telling you, it's always the sword boys that get me. I'm sure you've noticed that by now. I don't know what it is but. It's a thing.

Oh!!! Oh!!! Speaking of the *tucks hair behind ear*, there's this one scene where he's chasing the protagonists. And he goes, "Clever, aren't you?"

*SCREAMS*

That scene is truly a masterpiece. Thank you for the good food, Squeenix. I remember having to take a moment to just pause and regather myself. Actually, I had to do that the first time I saw him too-

I wasn't alone at the time when he was introduced so I was just silently like "ohmygodhellosir ajrfnaklwenjklwenjklrn" but oh my GOODNESS.

My s/i works with him! She's pretty much his right hand woman. She always has reports and intel on all their missions ready to go! I find it cute how well they work together, be it for mission-related matters, or just when they're relaxing together.

Just like pretty much all of my other s/is, she's a raging academic and total nerd. In the first game, they basically live on this human paradise called Cocoon. It ends up not being so great because the gods want to murder humanity but anyways! Education is pretty much free and you can study whatever you're passionate about. That's why she has studied just so many things.

She's not exactly the type who aspired to join the military, but alas! Things happened. I like to think of it as a "heyyyy y'all needed my help once and then once turned to twice and twice to thrice and then i never left" type thing.

Oh, and then she fell in love with Yaag while she was there.

Her cheery attitude is a direct opposite to his, but they're also able to have some very serious conversations with each other. I love their dynamic so much! Also, he can get a bit softer when he's opening up to her and,,, Soft Yaag??? Hoo boy.

Her motives and beliefs tend to align a bit more with the Cavalry branch, but i feel as though she fits in better with PSICOM. Also, the book describes the soldiers to be a bunch of dumbass dorks and just the thought of her smiling and cracking jokes with all of Yaag's men make me super happy.

Oh and she gets a cool uniform too! Because I said so.

Now, they've known each other for years by the time the end of the first game rolls around. They're happy together, maybe even engaged! It can go one of two ways here. He either dies or he doesn't.

I like adhering really closely to canon with my ships (*laughs in genesis angst*) but I also think it would be a blast if he were to survive.

In the novels after his death, some recordings of his are found. It's basically him talking about how the government sucks from the inside. A character finds these and reveals them to the public to get rid of the old government and an invite a newer one that actually cares about the people. However, it's never quite stated how he got those recordings. And that's where Ash steps in.

She brings them to his attention and helps him out, but then returns to live with the rest of the remaining soldiers in that camp they set up in the second novel. They all look up to her as a leader-type, which I find is really funny because she doesn't exactly have the qualifications? She worked with PSICOM, but was never exactly a soldier. But hey, it's right after the world (quite literally) fell apart, I don't think that anybody cares about that.

Also, there's another chapter where Snow ends up visiting, and she has a friendly chat with him!!! She helped out the protagonists a little bit near the end of the first game, so they have a slight idea of who each other are, but that doesn't exactly change the fact that she fell under the category of villain for a lot of it, despite not actually being a bad person. I also think that their dynamic would be fun. Snow also just makes me really happy LMAO.

I think that this version of Ash is really fun just because of how much the experience hardens her? She spends a lot of time grieving. Also!!! Whether or not she makes a cameo in 13-2 (maybe near the ruins early game?) is totallllyyyy up to you hehe! I think it would be neat for her to talk to the protagonists of that game, especially since Yaag was the one who orchestrated the Purge and at the ruins, there's a huge monument of the names of people who were killed there.

Also, whether or not she has a son here is up to you. I like to think of all my ideas all happening in alternate timelines so everything I want can happen without stepping on other events? I imagine their child to have Yaag's pretty silver hair with Ash's brown eyes.

Also, 13-2 is about time travel so like. The protagonists meeting their child in the future when he's all grown up? Good stuff.

But hey, in the main timeline she's alone after Yaag's death. She helps the other characters. I also think that in time, she does work for the Academy? I mentioned that she's pretty nerdy earlier, so that definitely helps out. She's super cool!!! Such a badass!!!

Now, on the flipside of things, what if he survived? Then what happens? shameless self promo

Yaag still has those recordings, and they do still reach Captain Rygdea. They both live in the small village that the remnants of PSICOM created. It's a sweet life. Are fankids a thing in their future? Yeah, probably.

I feel like Yaag would be a really good dad. I headcanon that he has a very strong relationship with his own father as well. He's caring and stern, but also knows when to turn down the serious scale. The novels also say that he likes kids!?!?!? I know I've screamed about this point like 24892 times on my blog. But.

It's so cute??? Who would expect this super serious and mean man who quite literally says that the protagonists aren't people, they're targets to like children of all things???? It really is my favorite thing ever just because of how cute it is. I also have a few tiny cousins in my family, so him playing with them makes me very soft too.

("Would you please stop tugging on my hair- Ash, this is not a laughing matter!" "Oh, but it so is.")

I think that detail really helps hint at him having a more gentle side? And I adore that.

Also, I mentioned how Snow pays a visit to the PSICOM camp after the events of the first game? I think that would be very interesting with Yaag there because before Yaag dies in canon, Snow says, "Stay alive. We'll see you when it's over."

And now he finally gets to see him. The conversation would get surprisingly deep and definitely dive into Yaag's motives and real thoughts about his actions in the game. I really enjoy the few interactions those two have in the game.

Anyways, now that we've gotten that out of the way, let's dig into the meat and potatoes of this ship.

In 13-2, they get a separate dlc side story just to themselves. Because I said so. I'm not sure how the plot of this works, but it's basically them exploring Gran Pulse together. Maybe to map things out? Maybe to get better acquainted with the world they thought was a hell their whole lives? Maybe there's some sort of big mission they have to do? We'll figure it out.

Basically, it's a whole side story of them exploring and kicking monster ass together. The combat is regular 13 combat.

Yaag has his sword along with some explosives (we see him carry some grenades at the end when he blew himself up). And Ash also has a sword because I like swords.

In the game, usually only l'Cie, or magic god slaves, can use magic. However, after the fal'Cie (magic gods) go poof at the end of the end of the first game, some normal humans can use magic? It makes no sense and exists only for plot convenience, but I'm not complaining because it makes my plot easier too.

My point is, Ash can use magic! Because A) she's quirky mage material B) we need a balanced team C) Every single version of Ash so far has been a mage. D) I like magic a lot. Would be my go-to as well.

Also, if you're interested in how they work in battle, roles divide up very nicely between them.

Yaag has: -Commando (physical attacks) -Sentinel (beefy tanks) -Sabuteur (debuffing enemies)

Ash has: -Ravager (magic goes brrr) -Medic (i think you know) -Synergist (buffing allies) -Commando (physical attacks)

Maybe Yaag could get medic too to balance off the load in battle? They're a blast in combat because they really do compliment each other.

Anyways, back to the adventure.

It's the two of them traveling around. The main focus of it is their conversations as they travel. There's a lot of fun banter. Ya know how like when you're walking around in Naughty Dog games and your characters are just chatting? Yeah. That.

Their conversations are super random and they cover pretty much every single topic ever. They go from really serious to them just being stupid. I love their friendly banter.

Also, when they set up camp and are about to sleep, we get to see sleepy Yaag in action. And do you know what that means?

It means we get to see Yaag with his hair done a bit looser, maybe even down!!! Yaag with his hair down is all I want to see. It's what we deserve. It's what we need. The day that I see Yaag with his hair down is the day i achieve true happiness LMAO.

It's what we need.

Ash playing with his hair??? Yes, I most definitely think so.

Oh and there is totally a "Yaag, I'm cold." "Allow me to help remedy that. *pulls her closer*" type moment because they're cute like that.

All in all, their travels are really fun. Maybe somewhere around there they run into the protagonists? Either from the first game or the second game. I think that would be a fun mess.

I feel like Yaag can show a softer side of him around her and that makes me really happy. He deserves to be happy and I love him very much.

I think about him all the time, and just the thought of him holding me makes me so happy. He really is just adorable.

Before I wrap this up, I have a few more things I want to speak about! Firstly, allow me to share one of my favorite pictures of him because oh. my. god.

*screams*

The urge to backhug him!!! Ahh!!! He's so cute!!!! I just wanna hold him aelajflanef.

One of my favorite pre-relationship moments from them is this one time where Yaag is pretty down in the dumps, and Ash is talking to him about it and offering her advice. And as she talks, she gently places a hand over his (they're seated side by side btw). He looks up at her in shock, and she takes back her hand is like, "O-oh! I'm so sorry, I should've asked first, I just thought tha-"

And then he just snatches her hand back and gently holds it. You can see the tips of his ears burning red haha! I think that they're pretty cute ajfwnjklef

She always tries her best to take care of him, too! He needs a hug, and she is more than happy to provide. She always tries to remind him to eat his meals on time and such, even if she can be questionable at following her own advice at times. She can also be a bit of a tease sometimes, so he can get pretty annoyed (not really, he thinks it's cute) sometimes.

However, he also does his best to take care of her. Would he pull the "that's an order." card after she refuses to rest, pulling several late-nighters for work? Yeah. Probably. He's very caring, even if he can come off as very serious and scary sometimes.

To wrap things up, I love Yaag Rosch.

Thank you for your time.

[naivesilver]

31, 56, 19, 78, 20, 16, 11, 12 , 10, 4, 1, 21, 36, 39. Sorry if this is too many 😅

Guys it’s NEVER too many you’re giving me the chance to talk nonstop about Sonic it’s the best thing that’s happened to me in days

also I had planned to answer them in the order you asked for but it was driving me crazy so I sorted them out thematically sorry alfhjkhljshja

I answered 1 here!

100 Sonic Questions

21.) Tell us a funny Sonic-related story.

This one comes from the depths of my very first months as a Sonic fan. Basically, I had watched Sonic X upon its first Italian release as a very very smol bean. By the time I got obsessed again in middle school, though, I had forgotten everything about it except a few shots from the Italian opening theme and ONE scene from a season three episode, where Sonic and Knuckles played chess on a spaceship and then Sonic began running around and fell into space.

The “friend” that had introduced me to the show again (not a nice person and source of about 25% of my trauma, I’m glad to say I haven’t seen her in years) didn’t believe me and accused me of lying. Repeatedly. Unkindly. For months. How could such a stupid scene be in such an amazing cartoon? I must be trying to fuck with her.

Fast forward to the end of the year. I’m minding my business and I see a Facebook message from this friend, and another, and another. I click on it wondering what she’d be going ham over, and BAM. This girl had been watching Sonic AMVs on Youtube and had caught a glimpse of that scene at the beginning of a video and was fucking losing it over the fact that WOW, I HAD BEEN TELLING THE TRUTH ALL ALONG?!

Now, you have to understand that I wasn’t the kind of kid that swore, back then. I had been brought up to think that swear words would send you to hell straight away. And while not a delicate little flower, I was much, much cuter and more proper than I am now because I couldn’t live out my butch dreams quite yet. But I needed to express all the frustration gathered in those months.

So please imagine this baby-faced, straight A student 13yo wait for her friend in front of their school and bellow at the top of her lungs “BITCH, WHAT DID I FUCKING TELL YOU?”

I still remember that scene fondly, though.

31.) Tell us a Sonic-related story that will give us feels.

Related to the experience I just mentioned, the problem I had in my first years in this fandom was that this person who had dragged me into it was obsessed with the thought that people would mock us for it. She said it was for kids, and when she got over it she gave me shit for clinging to my passion while she’d “grown up”, and she had me enjoy Sonic in secret and yelled at me for saying anything even vaguely related out loud where other people could hear us.

It got into my head so much that for a long long time I didn’t dare share anything Sonic-adjacent on any social media, long past when I’d broke away from her. I thought no one would ever take me seriously again. I felt ashamed a lot.

It got better, though. Slowly, I broke out of my shell and started interacting with this amazing fandom, and I found lots of people who didn’t give a damn about what the world thought of their passion. And I know tons of wonderful people outside the fandom, too, friends who encourage me to talk about Sonic even though they don’t know anything about it. Chats where any mention of Sonic has someone saying “wait we must tag naivesilver into this she’ll love it”. It’s - it warms my heart every day. Tumblr is a shithole, but it helped me in feeling free to do what I love in the fandom that I love most.

Thank you. To everyone that got me through that, thank you. You have no idea how helpful you’ve been to me.

19.) Favorite soundtrack

KNOCK KNOCK IT’S FUCKING KNUCKLES

20.) Least favorite soundtrack?

None I think???? There are some I don't listen to much, either because I haven't played the game or I just don't vibe with them, but there isn't any song that I particularly dislike. Almost all of them are genuine bops.

16.) (if you read fanfic) What are some fic tropes you love? Ones you hate?

FOUND FAMILY!!! Adoptive parents, siblings, friends taking care of each other, I want a shitton of fluff in my life. And kid!fic. I could read (and write!) kid!fic every day for the rest of my life and never get tired of it. That's why I enjoy Chaotix and Sonic Movie fics so much. Let's raise them boys well.

As for hating...I don't like high school AUs lmao I wrote one when I was younger but I never dared touch it again and I haven't read any Sonic one since 2014 at most. And most time travel fics. Sorry, Silver, I love you a fucking lot but time travel shenanigans are only funny in the two or three specific settings my mind lets me enjoy.

11.) Top five stages.

In no particular order:

-Press Garden (Mania)

-Casinopolis (Adventure)

-Casino Forest (Forces)

-Studiopolis (Mania)

Anddddd I haven't played much else so I'll have to get back to you on this ajshfkjfahlljha

12.) Worst five stages.

-IMPERIAL TOWER

-IMPERIAL TOWER

-Jesus Christ I died 78 times in that stage alone

-I'm bad at being fast and not falling off stuff and it required me to do both at the same time

-Also the Shadow DLC levels. Fuck me up a bit more will you

56.) In your opinion, what’s the weirdest thing any character has ever said?

I'm a simple girl, I see this panel and I lose my shit

10.) What do you like best about your favorite animated adaptation?

I only finished my Sonic X rewatch yesterday and I’ve been meaning to make some final comments about it (tho it’d probably be me rambling at thin air bc I doubt I can say anything that hasn’t been already said over and over and over) but the most compelling thing for me is and always will be the music.

Don’t get me wrong, what I’ve seen of the OG Japanese version had wonderful, heartfelt music, but the upbeat themes I grew up with still have me vibing day in and day out. I can dance to the Italian opening sequence at any given moment - no, you know what, here it is. Watch it and feel the serotonin drip into your veins.

(Some people will come at me for this, but I didn’t watch this show in 2019-2020 to make an in-depth analysis about it. I did it to have a dance off while Knuckles beat up some robots.)

78.) Post a scene that always gives you feels.

Sonic 06:

13yo me about to see her first ship torn apart:

4.) The last Sonic game you played is now your life. How awesome is this adventure gonna be?

Sonic Adventure - which means it’s a pretty cool life, unless it runs like SA does on my laptop and it turns slow and glitchy and grinds on my nerves even more

36.) C’mon now. How many ships do you have? :P

A FUCKING LOT my main ones are silvaze, vecpio and sonadow but I have many medium or small ones that I enjoy finding content for, like tikaze or knouge

39.) Which game is your golden standard?

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, I’m not the greatest game fan as in I’ve only been actively playing for the past 2/3 years. Before that it was just gameplays on Youtube, so you should not take my opinion into any account since it’s not very informed.

However there was something about Sonic and the Black Knight that just felt...new? Peculiar? I know jack shit about the technical side of gaming but I remember being extremely pumped every time I logged in to see more of it. I'd like to feel that again, when a new game drops.

[oddcoupler222]

Akskdkdk I’m not crying I just got some tww feelings in my eyes and to the rest of tww fans you’re welcome (I’m the biggest one of them all) let it be multi chapter 🤲🏻

did i take one person asking for something and turn it into a spinoff semi romance novel? i… may have.

Eliza -

Colleen -

(for funsies)

 Fall 2018

Eliza wouldn’t say she loved her work study job in the registrar’s office. But she had friends with various other jobs throughout campus, and she knew because of their tales that her job wasn’t the worst.

Would she love to trade with her new friend, Sara, and have the job in the printing lab in the library, where she would just have to un-jam the printer and restock it with paper, then sit on her laptop? Of course. But she was also nosy as fuck and she got a lot of insider info from her supervisor here. Plus, she got all of the registration codes early. So who was the real winner?

Still Sara.

“Hello? Hi. I’m sorry, are you busy? I’m - I’m not trying to be obnoxious, but I really really have to get into a class, and I have nowhere else to go to ask. I’ve tried the professor, I’ve tried her TA. I’ve asked all of the upperclassmen I know. And this is the final stop before I may very well have a breakdown.”

A frantic, pleading voice interrupted her IG scrolling. It was technically one of her two fifteen minute breaks that she got during her five hour shift. She intended to tell the interloper that she would have to wait until the other side of the office didn’t have a line, because where her desk was, was technically closed.

But Eliza had never seen an angel in real life before. And she was such a simple, simple lesbian.

Never in her life had she ever been struck like this, though. The tousled blonde hair that she could see was usually nice and orderly. The clothes that screamed an upper-middle class (at the very least) background, though trendy.

Blue eyes crystal clear but starting to brim with tears.

“I’m not busy. What can I do for you?”

“Thank the gods! In order to graduate on time with my major and both of my minors, I need to double up on some courses. Which means I have to take some courses before I’m technically supposed to. So, I got permission to take Ethnicity and Identity with Dr. Oakhart next semester, even though it’s a semester early. Because I need to take Cultures of Essos the semester after, and it’s a prereq. But it took forever to get permission to take Oakhart’s class early; I had to basically camp out in her office,” a little laugh fluttered out, anxiously. “And now? She gave me permission but told me she wouldn’t let me jump the waitlist. I just. I really need to get into that class. Can you even just tell me how long the waitlist is, maybe? Please?”

Someone was wound extremely tightly. It wasn’t usually something Eliza, as a laidback person, enjoyed. But she was already charmed.

“Let me check.”

She typed in her credentials into the system as she surreptitiously glanced up at the girl. Her cheeks were flushed and seven hells. She was cute.

“You really camped out in her office?”

“Huh?” A fleeting smile flashed over her face, and it warmed everything inside of her. “Oh. Well, I know it sounds crazy in retrospect. I can just sometimes get very focused.”

“I gotcha.” Eliza did not, in fact, relate. But her pretending to put this girl at ease.

She pulled up Oakhart’s Gender and Identity class for the spring – and yikes, there was a waitlist a mile long.

“That’s not a good face.”

“Ouch.” She kidded.

“Gods! No, your face isn’t -”

She stopped her before she could ramble anymore. Especially because she wasn’t sure she could handle some sort of mangled compliment from this gorgeous creature without stumbling over herself. “It’s cool. Uh, yeah, no the waitlist isn’t bad.” She lied through her teeth.

“It’s not?” The could-be model’s voice was as incredulous as it should be, as she tried to lean over the counter to see the computer. Like she had to see to believe.

And Eliza quickly turned the computer more toward herself, “Uh, you can’t - against policy-” once again, the lies.

“Sorry. That was probably crossing a line.” She blew out a deep breath and her shoulders deflated. “I guess, can you just put me on the bottom of the list?”

“Yeah,” she lied, fully intending on breaking the rules, as she clicked the top of the waitlist to flag her into the class. “I just need… your name.”

She very much wanted to learn her name.

“Colleen Durand. D-U-R-A-N-D,” she spelled it, and Eliza could very easily see that she’d spelled her name or heard it spelled just so in order to get places in life many times.

She typed her name into the first place on the wait list. “I imagine you will probably hear about this class sometime soon. Don’t fill this block on your class schedule.”

An all too brief, but brightly blazing smile stole her breath. “Thanks so much.” Colleen checked her wrist, a nice looking silver watch glinting in the light coming in from the window. “Gods, I have to go. All right. Thanks again.”

“You’re welcome!” She called after her.

Colleen Durand. She loved the registrar’s office.

Spring 2019

Approaches to Comparative Literature… was a joke.

Colleen rarely thought of classes like that, because all she had in her head was her mother’s voice, saying, “If I’m paying for you to go to a public institution“ - even though it wasn’t in the top 5 universities in the nation (god forbid she go to a public university, even if it was ranked as one of the top ten colleges in the country) - “You’d better be bringing back nothing short of straight A’s.”

She was a junior in college, was on track to graduate at the top of her class even with having two minors - she took 6 classes a semester, not counting the summer and winter semester courses she took. And she took all of them seriously - took color coded notes by hand, sat in the front of the class.

But this course… she just couldn’t. She tried for the first two weeks, learned that the professor left much of his job up to the TA, and then said TA had hit on her in an extremely slimy way and she - well, after that she started slipping into the back row. Just this one class wouldn’t hurt.

She was the only one in her row and sitting in the back gave her a whole new perspective.

It especially gave her a perspective on the girl she’d only known as Nice Girl at the registrar office who doesn’t think I’m crazy before now, and now she knew her name - Eliza.

Eliza, she’d learned from sitting in the front, types vigorously during every class on her laptop and occasionally makes very funny commentary.

It was only in switching her seat to sit behind Eliza that she realized she isn’t taking notes on her laptop, but was instead just being very active on various social medias. Mostly twitter.

@elizathesapphicSCREAMING my TA just announced that some of our earliest lgbt writers were great friends and roommates. i could teach this course better lmao

She wasn’t wrong.

@elizathesapphica limerick -there once was a TA from hellwhose hair is rock solid from gelhis voice is nasally and gratinghis ignorance is so fucking frustratinglet’s not forget he’s smarmy as well

Colleen had genuinely had to smother a laugh from that one. And, it turned out, from many others. The semester passed in a blur of moments - her twentieth birthday, an intense and stressful visit from her mom, juggling 6 courses and her first practicum - but Eliza stands out.

They don’t talk, because… well, what would they even talk about? They seem like really different people and Eliza is super lively, but she learns a lot about her.

If it wasn’t obvious from her twitter handle (obviously), she’s a lesbian. Who very much loves Margaery Tyrell - someone Colleen vaguely knows is a recently out politician - and Sansa Stark - who Colleen is very familiar with, because of the writings she’d done and the classes she’d taken that Sansa had TA’d for before she’d finished her master’s - and their very public relationship.

As well as many, many other lesbian celebrities and television shows that Colleen does not watch or follow, but is still entertained by because Eliza is entertaining.

At the end of the semester, she follows Eliza’s twitter on the account she never uses that is basically untraceable to her. It has her name on it, sure, but nothing else. No pictures. No retweets.

But Eliza’s twitter is good for a laugh and sometimes she needs that.

Fall 2019

“Ohhhh my godddd, Sara. Can you believe it’s her?” Eliza wrapped her arm around her best friend’s shoulders, pulling her close - as if they could shrink back against the wall behind them.

They were going home the following day for winter break and so it seemed like everyone who had an off campus apartment was throwing a party. Which was great because Eliza hadn’t gone out this semester much at all. There had been too much work and too much - uhhh well, being lazy and not wanting to leave her dorm when she could binge watch shows with Sara.

Sara elbowed her in the side accidentally as they fell back against the wall. “It’s who?”

She pointed across the large living area full of tipsy-to-drunk college students, to the front door. “Colleen! She - I don’t think she ever comes out? Why do you think she is right now?”

Sara’s eyes rolled before she jostled their shoulders. “Oh you mean your cruuuush. I don’t know, it’s the end of the semester. Everyone’s out. It’s not a big deal.”

Eliza ignored her and stared at Colleen as she and a friend Eliza recognized didn’t know the name of - she was a master social media creep but that didn’t help when someone didn’t have social medias - chatted and made their way across the room.

And her heart started racing. “Oh my gods. Oh. She’s coming over here. Do you think she -”

“We’re right next to the drinks, why do you think she’s coming over?” Sara’s retort quickly popped her rapidly inflating hopes, and she trained a critical eye on Colleen-Gorgeous-Durand. “That is dream crush girl?”

Eliza spun so quickly to face Sara that she nearly sloshed her vodka cranberry over the rim of her cup. “How can you say it like - like that? Look at her!”

“I mean. She is pretty. In a buttoned up way.” Sara turned to face her, having to tilt her head up just enough to quirk an eyebrow. “Is that your type? You haven’t dated much in our eight month friendship tenure.”

Eliza scoffed. “No! No. I don’t have a… type.” She started slapping Sara’s arm, “Ohhhh gods, she’s coming, she’s coming, she’s -”

Sara caught her hand and held it tight, hissing, “Calm down, you look insane.”

Colleen approached them with a nervous looking smile. “Hey. Can I ask where you got your drink?” She surveyed the table in front of her, dubiously, “I just don’t really see the mixer I want -”

It was like an automatic reaction. Eliza’s hand shot out and offered her cup, “Take it! Still full. Just made it. Made tons of them. See?” She held it up so the rim reflected the dim light. “I didn’t take a sip yet or anything. I can go make another cup.”

Those sky blue eyes were so brilliantly light and she gave the slightest twitch of an eyebrow as she accepted Eliza’s drink. “Um… thanks?”

“Yeah. No prob. Enjoy.” She grinned, knowing it was too bright for the moment, but whatever.

She felt triumphant, even when Sara collapsed against her in a fit of giggles as Colleen walked away. “Holy shit. I see now why you haven’t dated.”

“Um, what is that supposed to mean? She sought me out.” Now that she replayed the interaction, though, she could… sort of… see where she’d gone wrong.

Oh, fuck.

Sara only laughed harder, letting Eliza’s hand go and wrapping it around her waist in a hug. “Listen.” She tried to calm her laughter. “Listen. What I just witnessed means one of two things: your crush is an absolute idiot who took a drink from you, a weird ass stranger at a party. Or she actually somewhat recognizes you, too, and doesn’t think you’re a creepy stranger.”

“Oh, fuck. Now I need to find more cranberry juice.”

Spring 2020

“Who’s that girl over there? She keeps looking at us.” Colleen’s friend and flatmate, Natalia, commented. They were in the dining hall, which is a rarity since they hadn’t lived on campus since they were freshmen.

“What girl?”

“Pretty, dark hair, dark eyes. She has like 4 piercings up her ear. She has a rainbow pin on her backpack. Seems gay.”

Pretty with dark hair and eyes, the earrings, and the dead giveaway rainbow pin already tells her it’s most likely Eliza Harlow, even before she turns and looks. Colleen rolls her eyes. “How does she seem gay? Besides the rainbow pin,” she adds on, even though she knows - of course Eliza Harlow is gay.

Her still very active twitter is still hilarious and very, very full of lesbian pop culture. It’s gotten almost kind of frustrating, the fact that Eliza never really posts anything about herself on her twitter. Colleen definitely knows she is a lesbian more than anything - she posted something just last night about a pro soccer player and proclaimed that her lesbian heart wasn’t going to survive her coming out.

But she never posts anything about her own life. It’s not like Colleen cares? But she can’t help but be intrigued. It’s weird. But maybe that’s just the culture they live in these days.

She still turns and looks where Natalia is pointing, anyway. Sure enough, Eliza is sitting - backpack perched on the table next to her bagel, rainbow pin on display - with her ever present friend whose name Colleen knows is Sara (thanks, twitter). Pretty with her dark hair curling, as usual, over her shoulders.

And, Natalia was right. She’s throwing looks over at them.

Eliza had spoken to her for the first time, without having to do so for a class project, last week. She’d tossed her backpack over her shoulder super casually - Colleen had noticed out of the corner of her eye, as she’d packed up her own bag - and approached her.

“Can I borrow your notes?”

Colleen was always loathe to part with her notes. She took pride in them - even color coded them - and she doubted that strangers would take as much care with them as they deserved.

But Eliza… well, she didn’t really know her. But she didn’t feel like a stranger either. Especially with her eyes looking all hopeful and nervous. She wondered if Eliza had fallen behind in class with all of the work she was doing on her social medias. Or on her work for the internship she had at the Red Keep (thanks, twitter).

She’d handed over her notebook with a smile that was genuine.

“Whatever. The rainbow pin is why she seems gay, fine. But she’s coming over here.” Natalia brings her back to the moment, making a face at the meatloaf she’s eating before she pushes the tray away. 

Colleen sat up straighter, dropping her own fork. “That’s Eliza. We’re in Valyrian Lit class together.”

Eliza walked even closer, looking… apprehensive. Her big, expressive eyes were downcast, as she worried at her generous bottom lip. Which was weird because no, she didn’t know Eliza personally. But she kind of did know her personality. And she was not apprehensive.

It took a moment for Colleen to notice the notebook in her hands. And that it wasn’t the same green one - always green notebooks for lit classes - she’d given Eliza three days ago.

“Hey! Colleen! Hey. Uhhh. I have… your notebook.” Eliza held out the notebook toward her, shifting back and forth on her feet. “Your notes were - great. Such a help.”

“No problem, but…” Colleen eyed the notebook - a mint green as opposed to her hunter green. “That’s not mine.”

“No, it is! I - it is.” Eliza cleared her throat and slid it down onto the table. “It’s definitely yours, now. Um. The thing is. My obnoxious roommate  - I didn’t choose her? I was supposed to live with my friend, but then housing got all messed up and. It’s a whole thing,” she waved her hand, and Colleen, despite being so anal about what the fuck happened to her notebook, couldn’t help but be entertained. “The point is, she spilled her coffee all over your notebook.”

“What?!” All the gods, her notes. All her time and color coordination. And that had all of her handouts and - fuck. Dr. Lannister was not an easy professor to pass, his exams were notoriously difficult -

“Ohhhh, shit,” Natalia whispered.

Eliza quickly flipped the notebook open, frantically pointing at the pages. “No! Wait. I, I dried out your notebook and spent all last night re-writing your notes. I tried finding a matching notebook, but this was the only green one they had at the store. And I bought colored pens, because I figured out the color system, too. It’s all there. I swear. And I made copies of all of the handouts and put them in the back. Thanks. For the notes. I’ll never ask again, I swear.”

She hitched her backpack over her shoulder without another word and spun on her heel.

Colleen leaned over the table to peek at her notes and… wow. Eliza really did figure out her color coding system, even down to the obsessive tonal color changes for different types of literature. And. She skimmed her eyes quickly over the page - Eliza definitely left some insightful notes in here that Colleen herself had missed.

She turned her head to see if she could even call out her thanks to Eliza, but she was too far away. All she could see was the other girl slapping her palm against her forehead as she turned to leave the hall.

It made her smile.

Fall 2020

Professor Stark tapped her hands on her desk, “And as much as I know group projects aren’t everyone’s favorite thing, the sad reality is that we have to work with people in real life that we don’t get to choose. So, you will all individually document what you do in this project and then evaluate each other’s contributions at the end. You have your groups, the rubrik, and some examples to start with. Even though the project isn’t due for over a month, I would highly recommend starting it early.”

Eliza wouldn’t say she loved group work by any means, especially when the groups were assigned.

Colleen caught her eye and asked, “You want to come to my place this weekend to get started? I really don’t like to wait until the last minute for these kinds of things.”

Eliza was pretty sure she was going to write Sansa Stark a thank you letter.

[parkaiur]

Final Thoughts on YGTB/The Lineup

... well let’s just jump right into it shall we?

ok.. this show was a waste of time and a waste of all my fucking emotions. the only reason i put up with YG’s bullshit is because I thought team a+jihoon would debut, but yg is too fucking stupid to do that so : )

anyways, let’s get into the reason why this show is trash :)

first of all, the emotional trauma all the boys have been put through?

there are 28 trainees, they all thought that the debut group was going to be 5 members... imagine how stressful and scary that must be for all of them. once they split from their respective teams, they were all heartbroken they were being split from their friends? seriously... what was yg doing breaking such strong teamwork in ALL the teams...

the reason why ikon was, and is, so popular is because of their strong teamwork. people are connected to the bond between the members and it shows when people have been through a lot together 

moving on, there are literally 13&14 year old kids in this show... like c’mon, what i was worrying about at 14 was if my friends had the same lunch as me.. :/ and on top of the trainee life, they’re forced to be split from all their friends... these poor dudes 

AND THE EDITING, OH GOSH THE EDITING

for the ENTIRE show, YG depicted team a as the “bad guys”. first from when yoonbin and yeongue lost the 2:2 battle. so many people got upset, saying that it was a popularity battle when in reality, they had the smallest gap out of all the teams... hah . 

they also edited out byounggon’s rap in the Im Not Sorry performance which caused ppl to think that only Seunghun controlled that stage, when in reality, both of them chewed up the stage. 

im not even going to mention how initially Yoonbin x Keita’s rap battle was edited out before they were hella popular cuz yg is a fucking snake and there are SO many examples as to which this happened so i’ll only name a few 

next, THE FINAL GOING CRAZY PERFORMANCE. the focus was SO obviously on Jaehyuk when Hyunsuk started to rap ... like cameraman... the rapper was Hyunsuk, not Jaehyuk... pls ... also, when jihoon was singing, the cameraman panned to junghwan... i think im starting to predict something :   )

anyways, Doyoung and Jihoon were both edited out of their FINAL PERFORMANCE ON THIS SHOW??? WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK. Doyoung choreographed that dance YET his solo in Earned It was edited out?? and Jihoon was just edited out completely??? i thought we would FINALLY get to hear both of their stunning vocals and ... nothing .... it’s obvious only yg’s favorites gets aired 

now, mentioning all of team a+jihoon being mistreated, i kept up with this fucking show because i thought yg was just trying to rile up fans and would debut them later.... I WAS WRONG. 

all silver boys can either write songs, produce music, and choreograph... yet he chose some members that cant... im not saying that Haruto and Junghwan are untalented, when I think they’re very good at what they do, but theyre just so young and have so much more room to grow. YG chose these members because of their potential .. but he refused to debut boys who already have honed their potential ... wtf

YG obviously only used Silver Boys as a way to gain popularity for this show, and it’s not sitting well with me. tons of fans have been waiting s o l o n g for these boys to debut, especially last year in the Stray Kids survival show and Mixnine. they had fans who were dedicated and saw their talent, and were waiting for them (i am one myself). and when YGTB was released, it seemed like the perfect show because it had all my favorite boys ! (ok most im looking at you jeonwoong, raesung, and noa) 

but then yg turns around and pulls this ... this on us... 

seriously come at me for saying this cuz im going to delete my account soon :/ 

ALSO ive seen so many posts telling Silver Boys stans to like calm down ?? and to not hate on the members... let me get this straight, IM NOT HATING ON THEM. Simply saying someone is too young and inexperienced to debut is NOT hate. 

Also, yg expected this happen. he knew junghwan (and even haruto) would get hate and backlash and he debuted them anyways... seriously if that isnt the definition of cruel. he just wants to stir up the public and honestly idk if it’s going to work this time since so many people are upset. yg SAW the online voting which, if you didn’t know, had 300K votes for the Silver Boys, yet he still didn’t choose to debut them... wow 

if yg’s target was younger fans... he got them. but im just saying this now, all yg groups have older, more mature fans, and what i’ve seen from this fandom is not that. yg just lost a veteran yg stan but he doesnt care does he now 

also , dont console SB fans when you’re just trying to defend your faves. and when i say console, dont say “omg just support the group! you have to stan forever or else you’re fake>:(” like... NO. you actually dont have to stan a group you dont like ??? i have freedom ?? LMAO 

plus raesung coming to the final show made all of us VERY emotional and we wanted a happy ending for our boys, and we didnt get one. which obviously crushed us, so just,,, back off for a moment and dont try to make us feel worse about what’s happening right now 

anyways, yg basically debuted a group with visuals (as of right now) and it’s making me sick. i didnt think he was taking the visuals things seriously but seeing this lineup? he obviously was. and no, im not saying that visuals dont have talent just to be clear. im just saying that there are people who are “not visuals” who are just as talented. 

my predictions for the next three members? It’s Yoonbin or Hyunsuk, Mashiho, and Jaehyuk. why? they’re all yg’s favorites and are visuals. 

im not in the mood for discussion just come in my inbox if you’re going to talk about Silver Boys or about how nice your day was cuz i need to either distract myself or mourn ;-; 

also the immense guilt that silver boys stans feel right now is uncontrollable... we tried so hard for so long yet our efforts have fallen through... and not only do we have a bond towards our boys, but we have a bond with each other. Us Silver Boy stans have also been through a lot together and when you solo stans were running around, we were getting shit done. we fight for the SB boys and we fight for each other, dont think we are going to stop now <3

[bebecue]

Black Bean Noodles

Anonymous said: “Can I request a scenario where you have a crush on Jooheon but he doesn’t know and he likes you back? […] you think he’s in a relationship but he [isn’t]? Thanks! x Love your writing.”

A/N: This is a series in the works. I’m not sure how many parts there are going to be, but hopefully I can wrap it up quite soon ^^ (Also, I’ve tweaked the request a little bit to make it more inclusive. I hope you guys can enjoy it anyway!) ((also lmao but some of the titles for my pieces are food-derived. you can see how food is quite literally always on my mind))

Jooheon | Fluff | 1551 words

Working at Starship Entertainment is both a dream and a nightmare come true for you. While some may assume that your job is super exciting, getting to work with several artists and all that, you know better. It is long hours at the office, mostly at your desk, and your days are filled with meetings, phone calls, and administration work. You barely get to see or meet with artists at all. Even if you did, it is mostly in passing. You would say a polite hello, and they would nod back, cool and aloof. Other than that, you are mostly invisible. That’s why it baffles you when Lee Jooheon, a member of Starship Entertainment’s most popular group, tries to make conversation with you in an elevator.

It is almost 9 pm, and you are done for the day. You work at one of the top floors of Starship’s building, and you are making your way down to the basement parking lot via the elevator. You look at yourself in the reflective surfaces inside the elevator. Your hair is slightly greasy, and dozens of baby hairs stick out in different directions. You try to smooth them down, but your attempts are in vain. There is a little bit of black bean sauce left over from dinner on the corner of your mouth, and you are thankful that no one has since you since you had eaten your meal. You quickly wipe it away with your thumb, when the elevator dings, indicating that you have stopped at a floor. You move into the corner of the elevator, making way for the person about to enter. A silver haired man gets in, and by his hair color, you assume that he is an artist. He looks at you, and you give him a small, polite smile. He returns it, and turns towards the elevator doors as they close. He looks familiar, and you try and remember which group he is from. What’s his name? Ah, that’s right. Lee Jooheon. From Monsta X. One of their rappers. 

You’re quickly going through his profile in your brain, something you have been trained to do since your first day at this job. Born in 1994. 177 cm tall, blood type O. Likes tteokbokki, gets scared easi-

“Done for the day?”

Your thoughts are interrupted by Jooheon’s question. He is looking at you, and you blink in response, initially unsure of how to answer his question. Eventually, your brain catches up, and you manage to reply.

“Yeah. You?” You wince, unsure if you should use honorifics while talking with him. Was he your superior? Your elder? Your senior? Luckily, he doesn’t seem to mind.

He chuckles, and turns away from you again. “I’m just getting started.”

Your brain stalls again, but fortunately, the elevator gives another timely ding. Jooheon steps out onto the floor, and he smiles at you briefly.

“See you around,” he says, leaving before you can respond. 

You’re not sure why, but you find your heart racing, your stomach doing small flips, and your palms slightly sweaty. You groan to yourself as you realize that you are developing a crush silver-haired rapper Lee Jooheon, someone who hasn’t even said twenty words to you.  

The work days go by slowly for you, but never slow enough that you actually catch up on the work that you’re far behind on. Late nights at the office are a common occurrence for you, as are dinners of delivery black bean noodles at your desk. You start to wonder if you’ll ever see daylight again, as report after report, sandwiched between meetings, are assigned to you. You’re busy finishing up an email during one of your late nights when you hear someone enter your department. You hear one of your co-workers give someone a surprised sounding greeting, and your name is mentioned somewhere in their quick banter. 

“Oh. Uh, over there,” you hear your co-worker say.

You hear footsteps approach you, softened by plush carpeting. 

You freeze in your cubicle, quickly racking your brain for anyone who could possibly want a meeting with you this late at night. Your supervisor had already gone home from the night, and the intern you were co-ordinating with from the accounts department shouldn’t be staying in the building this late. Before you can deduce any more possibilities, a shock of silver suddenly flashes into your vision. You see Jooheon’s face pop up above the wall of your cubicle behind the screen of your PC. 

“Hey,” he says, giving you a dimpled smile.

You blink at him, wondering if staring at a screen the whole day had made you start to hallucinate. You’re at a loss for words, once again. What on earth was he doing here at your desk?

Jooheon frowns at you. “Um, sorry. I don’t think I’ve actually introduced myself. My name is Jooheon.”

“I know who you are,” you reply, and you realize that it may have sounded a little bit too abrupt. “Sorry,” you continue, after a small pause. “I mean, it’s part of my job to know who you are.” 

There is a moment of uncomfortable silence between the two of you, neither of you sure of how to continue the conversation.

You decide to break the silence, speaking cautiously this time. “How… can I help you?”

“Oh, uh…” Jooheon comes around to the side of the cubicle so that he stands next to you, instead of being behind your screen. He’s holding a baseball cap in his hands, and he fidgets with it while he talks to you. “I saw you in the elevator the other day, and I was just thinking about how I haven’t seen you before. Are you new here?”

You push your chair away from your desk, and you stand up, straightening out your clothes. You give him a slight bow and introduce yourself. 

“I’ve been working here for about four months now,” you say, standing upright again. “I kinda monitor your SNS accounts, to see what works and what doesn’t.”

Jooheon raises his eyebrows. “So, are you the one who gives the final approval as to what we can post up?”

“No,” you laugh. “I don’t have that kind of power. I just look at retweets, likes, comments, replies, that kinda stuff. I try to find out where in the world your fans are interacting with your SNS from, and what kind of content gets the most interaction.” 

“Ah,” Jooheon replies, his eyebrows furrowing. “So… what kinda stuff do our fans like?”

You grin, amused at his curiosity. “Well, anything with you guys and animals or little kids gets hella likes and retweets. Also, selfies. Your fans love selfies.”

Jooheon nods, his lips slightly pursed. He glances at your screen, then turns his attention quickly back to you. “Can I know what you’re working on now?”

You frown. “We’re trying to see how you can interact with your international fans more. They always seem to feel left out when your SNS accounts post up about local events and fanmeetings. I was just proposing that you guys post selfies with cute little captions in English. It may seem like something small, but I’m sure your international fans will appreciate it. You guys have a huge international following.”

You turn your attention back to your screen. “I was just actually about to send an email. Was there anything else?”

Jooheon smiles at you again, and you feel your breath catch in your throat. You internally scold yourself and tell yourself to calm down. He was just a guy who could spit out words really fast from his mouth. His beautifully shaped mouth, with plump lips that you were so sure would feel soft against your own-

“Yeah,” Jooheon replies, yanking you from your involuntary daydream. You shake your head slightly, cringing at your own thoughts. What the hell was that?

“I was wondering if you had dinner already.”

You motion to an empty bowl in your desk. All that was left in it was some remnants of black bean sauce and a pair of used wooden chopsticks. “I have, thanks for asking.”

“Oh.” Jooheon pauses for a bit. “Is it okay if I drop by here once in a while? I need a break from the studio sometimes.”

“Um, sure,” you reply. “This place gets a little too quiet at times. It would be nice to have a little bit of noise.”

Jooheon grins at you and your heart starts to race again. “I’ll see you tomorrow then? I’ll bring dinner. And the noise.”

Before you can say anything, Jooheon turns away from you and heads towards the exit. “Sorry, I gotta go now! Dance practice starts in ten minutes.” 

You watch as he leaves, past your co-worker’s desk, who raises his eyebrows at you. You shrug back, and sit down at your desk again. Your hands are still shaking as you finish the email. You hit the send button, then sigh, reclining back into your chair. You then sit up again, and grab your sticky note pad and a pen from the corner of your desk. You smile to yourself as you quickly scribble down a note, reminding yourself not to order your usual dinner of black bean noodles with a side of pickled radish tomorrow night. 

[thedateranalyst]

Interchangeable Bae

On a national level I was devastated to leave the single market. On a personal level I am even more devastated to be re-joining it. If the future of this country is bleak, the future of this single market looks even bleaker. No longer will we be able to suggest the fail-safe first date option of wine and cheese. “BUT”, I hear the fervent Brexiteers amongst you cry (of which I can’t imagine there are that many but this blog is nothing if not apolitical), “you can still have British cheese and wine”. This is true. Whatever your political affiliations though, there is a reason that French, rather than English is universally known as the language of love.

You can’t help but fancy someone as they order a bottle of Chateau Neuf du Pape, as happens frequently on my first dates. The same cannot be said as they ask the waiter for a bottle of Court Garden Ditchling Red which legitimately sounds like the grapes were grown in an underwhelming dyke. Similarly, I am as strong an advocate of a Wensleydale or a Double Gloucester as the next gal. but they don’t sound quite as seductive as Epoisses or a Comte. I’m afraid it only gets worse; not only are we to be done out of the dairy-based and drinkable delights the continent has to offer, we won’t have the thickly accented, tanned and toned men to discuss them with. We must say au revoir to Antoine, arrivederci to Angelo and adios to Alberto. Shit! Or merde! Time is of the essence. As I rejoined one single market, I realised I better make the most of the other whilst I still had the chance...

So there I was, back in the game and back on the apps. I am thrilled to report that little has changed in my two-year absence from the world of Hinge, Bumble and Tinder. Using them is rather like riding a bike - even if you’re a little rusty, the fundamentals remain the same. It wasn’t long before the matches started trickling in. Given the previous paragraph, it would be fair to assume I kept things strictly continental but age has taught me the benefit of an open mind (plus beggars can’t be choosers). Thus I ended up agreeing to a date with the distinctly un-exotic sounding Angus.

I’m still not entirely sure how much of his original date suggestion was a joke and how much of it was a genuine invitation but during our cyber small talk he mentioned that he was spending his afternoon prepping for a dinner party (or DP as he referred to it) and asked if I would like to join. I mulled this over - on the one hand, after a fair amount of time out of the dating game, a dinner party of strangers would definitely be throwing myself back in at the deep end. On the other hand, it could have the potential for great blog fodder. Well, there was no question really was there. “Sure”, I replied.

It was only at this point that he divulged who the other guests were: his brother, his brother’s fiancee, his brother’s dog, his cousin, his cousin’s husband, their baby, his other cousin, her husband and their baby. What kind of a psychopath invites someone to meet their entire extended family on a first date?!? I suggested that maybe a pre-cooking drink would be more conventional and a safer bet.

Then came the logistics. He lived in CJ but had to head into town to pick up a jacket. This took a while to decipher; it transpires, for those of us not in the know, that CJ is Clapham Junction and ‘town’ refers to central London, specifically Piccadilly in this instance. I mean, alarm bells should have really gone off at this point - I am all in favour of an abbreviation, I can ROFL, LMAO and get DTF along with the best of them, but assuming that a stranger would immediately know what a DP and a CJ were suggested that old Angus moved in fairly narrow social circles. I had committed though so I had to follow through. He said he didn’t know central London too well so I suggested meeting in a fairly non-descript pub in Soho. It was mid-afternoon on a Saturday so I felt it was not quite the time for wine and cheese. 

There were further alarm bells when I arrived to find him wearing brown suede loafers, a signet ring and a jumper that only zipped down half way. I might as well have been back at one of our interchangeable singles dinners! Still, don’t judge a book by its cover and all that - we got chatting. It transpired that the jacket he was purchasing was a tweed one from Charles Tyrwhitt that he needed for just general drinks and things, naturally. I quickly steered the conversation on to less ridiculous territory. Hoping that podcasts would be a safer bet I said that I had been listening to Desert Island Discs on my walk there. He seemed surprised by this, saying “Really, I always thought it was just boring people being interviewed for old people to listen to?” I mean, there aren’t many things that I hold sacred but Desert Island Discs is definitely one of them. I will admit that this was pretty much a deal breaker there and then but by this point I had a pint in my hand, I couldn’t just walk away.

We moved on to the safer ground of what we did for work. Angus told me he was a stockbroker. This is one of those professions that, for me, just falls under the general umbrella of ‘adulting’ - I always try to make noises that suggest I am both impressed and fully informed on what this entails but in actual fact I don’t have a scoobies what on earth a stockbroker does. I assumed it was something suity though so asked if he worked in the City, a safe guess. “No, no,” he said, “I’m based in Oxford Circus”. Hang on a second. Earlier that day he had been unable to suggest a place for us to meet in Soho, the area next to Oxford Circus. It was slightly worrying that he worked in Oxford Circus and didn’t know a single pub in the vicinity. 

I thought that maybe food might be more of his cup (and saucer) of tea so asked what his usual lunch spots were. No points for guessing the response to this one - he was a regular Pret or M&S soup kind of guy, I asked if he had ventured as far as the Berwick Street food market. “Ooh, no, I’ve never even heard of it. What sort of food do they do?” I gave him a stall-by-stall account of the set up - the delicious gyros, the exotic salads, the stall selling what is arguably the best falafel wrap in London. “Hmm, might not be quite my sort of thing”, he pondered, “I’m not much of a fan of foreign food”. I was beginning to think this opinion may not only relate to Angus’s culinary tastes, so much for a continental embrace of all things and men European!

From there we moved on to what my plans were for the rest of the day, given that I was both unable and unwilling to attend his family reunion. I told him I was heading up to Old Street to help a friend with some DIY. He didn’t know where Old Street was. When I said it was in Shoreditch he clocked on, “Oh yes, in that direction?” In a similar manner to the date as a whole, he was entirely off the mark and pointing in totally the wrong direction. Well it is a long old commute from CJ to OS, with the latter providing little opportunity for him to take his new jacket for a spin.

To be fair to the guy, the date wasn’t entirely negative. Angus and I shared similar views on the stomach turning potential of a runny egg white and to give him his due, conversation was flowing and relaxed, if a little ridiculous. This may or may not have been helped by the fact that I had barely touched alcohol for over six months so by the bottom of two pints I was bother rather lively and a little bit slurry. He was a really nice guy though, it not fairly sheltered in both his life experience and London geographical knowledge. It wasn’t a resounding success of a first dip back into the dating pool but it wasn’t shockingly frosty enough to induce brain freeze or wind me. This arguably isn’t setting the bar particularly high but I’m really trying to find a silver lining here!

Eventually Angus had a lasagne to get making and I had a toilet seat to get attaching so we went our separate ways. To my earlier point, Angus couldn’t have been less continental if he tried. He was about as British as they come and did a great deal to prove my point of the need to make the most of those Europeans whilst we have them - a far better deal than any other that may be currently on the cards!

[lupismaris]

For the tv series ask: Black Sails!

Oh boy oh boy oh bOY

1- favorite character of all time?

James Flint McGraw. 100%. Granted, John Silver is so close behind him that its a tricky choice. But James is without a doubt my favorite character. Both because of his story, how well i relate to it, and because hes just an over dramatic shit who has never had an ounce of chill. I love him.

2- character i used to dislike but now love?

I never outright disliked him, but Charles Vane really grew on me through seasons 2 and 3. I think seeing him grow as a person, become himself, and stand for something greater than just gold made him a really wonderful character in my mind. Im in denial, at the very least.

3- character i used to like who i dislike now?

Dufresne. Like holy fuck dude you rip out a mans throat with your teeth and im thinking youre gonna be so much fun and then you turn into a weasly little shit who throws slurs at disabled people and betrays his crew. Like nah boy. Nah.

4- character im indifferent about?

Honestly i think eleanor, while being fascinating, interests me the least. I cant pinpoint why exactly, but while i respect her struggle and her various victories, she kinda exhausts me at times.

5- character who deserved better?

Miranda Hamilton and Mr Scott. Both get picked because they were such phenomenal people and their endings, while serving plot, left me feeling a tad bitter. Ill add Charles Vane as an aside, because im still in denial.

6- ship i cant get into?

Eleanor and Vane. To me, it seemed too toxic and too manipulative to be healthy and truly love. But thats just me.

7- ship i wont get over?

FlintSilver and FlintHamilton, aka the two canon ships that will haunt me until i die.

8- cute lokey ship?

Idk i like the idea of Ben and Billy. Its cute. Also Vane joining the poly trio of jack/anne/max because he needs love. And ot4 madi/silver/flint/thomas.

9- unpopular ship i enjoy?

Eh, i cant think of one?

10- ship that should never have been?

Im not crazy about eleanor and rogers but tbh i think youre not supposed to enjoy that one so idk. Not a fan.

11- favorite moment or story line?

YOU EXPECT ME TO CHOOSE??

Aaauuugghhh ok uhm well fuck, the entire “finding out about thomas” plot line like holy fuck, the “flint and silver carrying each other through the darkness” plot, the “max anne and jack figure out how to be happy” plot, every moment that flint cannot contain his sass, blackbeard being the king of no chill, jack rackham judging the world and woodes rogers, madi just existing, flint being violent against people who wronged him, flint being shook by powerful women like all the time, flint being 100% dad and 100% done, silver killing duresne after being called half a dozen slurs like goddamn i am still recovering from that, silver being a delightful little shit every five minutes, every monologue that flint has, know no shame-

Literally there are too fuckin many

12- plot you think should never have been written?

Its not something that shouldnt be written, but something i wish we saw more of, and thats madi and silver’s relationship. We dont get a lot of time to see them fall in love, and id have liked to see more of their growth together.

Also im in denial about charles so theres that.

13- first thoughts?

I had expected Black Sails to be like every other gritty, dark show about white dudes on tv. I had heard tidbits of good things but wasnt willing to be impressed. I mean, i love pirates, the whole aesthetic and idealism of pirates, i enjoy period pieces, and i enjoy a good bit of well choreographed violence. But the likelihood that it would be just like every other show on tv made me wary at first, so i put it off for a while. But when my boyfriend binged seasons 1-3 in as many days, i caved, expecting to be disappointed.

14- my thoughts now?

I have three Black Sails tattoos planned. I have “Know No Shame” in the bio of almost every social media account i use, i have been adding all the books mentioned in the show to my library, i have been telling everyone i come across to watch this show, i dragged my girlfriend into the abyss with me. I have cried more for this show than i have cried over any other media, and that includes any superheroes or harry potter or books.

The story morale, of love being our guiding principle, of fighting for who you are and your place in the world- the fact that the lead protagonist is an emotionally vulnerable bisexual man, that there are multiple queer characters and poly amorous arrangements, disabled characters who are strong and treated with respect, that the notion of liberation and freedom and the darkness being a home when civilization casts us aside-

This show has effected me in ways i would have never in my life anticipated or prepared for. I dont think i will ever be able to fully express the impact this show, this story, and most importantly these characters, have had on me as a person.

The simplest way to say it- it has made me braver, more willing to face the world as i am.

And maybe thats ridiculous. But what the show has given me, the lessons spoken by the characters, has given me footing, something to look to when im afraid.

Lmao so yeah thats black sails im gonna go hide in my pit of pirate despair now