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munson-blurbs · 1 year

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Single Dad!Eddie x Fem!ReaderSeries

1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6

Summary: Conflict arises with Harris's new teacher, filling Halloween with more tricks than treats. But it's nothing a visit with Ms. Sweetheart can't fix.

Warnings: allusion to Reader and Eddie's one-night stand, panic attack, Reader's grandma has dementia.

WC: 5.6k

Chapter 6/20

Scruffy!Eddie edit credit to @eddiemunsons-missingnipple Divider credit to @saradika

Guns N’ Roses t-shirt: check. Goodwill jeans with makeshift holes in the knees: check. Bandana tied snugly around his forehead: check. Arms littered with an assortment of temporary tattoos: check.

Eddie grins as he assesses his son’s costume, reaching into the thrift store bag as he pulls out the pièce de résistance: a denim jacket, only two sizes bigger than Harris would usually wear. It was a bit over what he’d been hoping to spend, but he’d reasoned with himself that it could also be worn after Halloween. It was an investment, he’d decided, not a splurge.

His smile falters when Harris indignantly stomps his foot, crossing his arms over his chest. While Eddie had hoped his son would go with more badass tattoo options, perhaps a skull and crossbones or even a snake, he had insisted on a Sesame Street theme. Cookie Monster munches on his signature treat as Harris pouts.

“No, Daddy!” he whines, twisting away when Eddie holds the jacket closer to him. “I can’t wear that!”

“C’mon, Har,” he tries, scouring his brain to come up with a convincing enough lie. “Axl Rose wore jackets all the time!”

Harris doesn’t just shake his head; he swivels his entire body back and forth in protest. “I don’t care! No one’s gonna be able to see my tattoos!” He holds out both arms in front of him; nearly every square inch (besides the section blocked by his cast) is covered. Eddie had spent most of last night diligently applying them precisely where Harris had asked, lest there be a tantrum. There was, unfortunately, a headless Elmo from when Harris had asked–no, demanded–that he try by himself. Still, Eddie figured that only one casualty was a win.

“Those are some sweet ol’ tatties,” Eddie muses, biting back a laugh at the two-dimensional Big Bird on his son’s forearm. “But wouldn’t it be cool if you wore the jacket into school and then–BAM!--took it off and surprised everyone with them?

Harris appears to consider this, mouth tucked into his cheeks. “Can I show Ms. Sweetheart?”

“Sure, bud. We’ll stop by her classroom when I pick you up.” Whatever gets us out of the house in weather-appropriate attire. “But first, show me your most metal pose.”

The boy opens his mouth wide and sticks out his tongue as far as it extends, scrunching his face dramatically until the corners of his eyes crinkle. His middle and ring fingers press into his palm, thumb crossing over them, with his forefinger and pinky raised in the quintessential rock ‘n roll symbol.

Eddie swoops down and smacks a wet kiss to Harris’s cheek. “That’s my boy!”

Standing among the crowd of parents at pick-up, Eddie opts out of making banal small talk and instead chooses to look at the bulletin board. The previous art project that had been hanging against the faded blue paper–”self-portraits” that the students had made on the first day of school–have been replaced by finger paintings of orange blobs that vaguely resemble pumpkins. There wasn’t one for Harris because he was in Ms. Sweetheart’s classroom then, so it’s his first art project in his new class. He eagerly scans the board for Harris’s, frowning when he can’t find his name.

Maybe it’s still drying, he tries to convince himself, imagining his son over-saturating the paper with globs of paint. It wouldn’t be entirely out of character.

Ms. Marion’s classroom is a sea of costumed children. A boy dressed as one of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles stands by his mom. A Cinderella, a black cat, and a Thomas the Tank Engine surround Ms. Paula. As soon as Eddie spots Harris, he smiles and waves him over, hurriedly scribbling his signature on the sign-out sheet.

He expects Harris to zoom past the other kids, fueled by the standard Halloween diet of sugar and chocolate, but he just kind of…mopes to the doorway. His shoulders slump dejectedly, and though he keeps his gaze low, Eddie can still see the film of mist staining his innocent eyes.

“Har, what’s wrong?” He waits for an answer, and when he doesn’t receive one–an oddity for his perpetually chatty son–he tries a new tactic. “Wanna show me where your artwork is? I must be gettin’ old, because I couldn’t find it on the board out there.”

“‘S not there,” Harris mumbles, scratching off a flaking piece of the Rosita tattoo on the back of his hand. “I didn’t get to finish.”

Eddie watches as the tears start to slip down his cheeks, and he brings him into the hallway before Ms. Marion or Ms. Paula sees what’s going on. He can’t be certain, but his paternal instincts tell him that they’ve contributed to Harris’s sad state. “Why not?”

“I-I t-tried, but M-Ms. Mar-Marion and Ms. P-Paula got m-mad at me.” The words come out between choked sobs. “‘C-Cuz I c-couldn’t sit d-down.”

“What do you mean?”

“I k-keeped st-standing up, ‘cuz m-my legs wanted to st-stand.” The explanation tumbles out of him so quickly, as though he’s trying to beat the clock. “And they s-said if I did-didn’t sit down, I c-couldn’t do art. But I k-keeped f-f-forgetting, and th-they t-taked away my pay-pay-paper and said, ‘sit in the c-corner!’”

Eddie’s breath hitches, and he has to clear his throat before speaking again. “Did…did that happen in Ms. Sweetheart’s class? The legs thing?”

“Mhm,” Harris manages, “b-but she let me stand and d-do ju-jumps to get the wig-wiggles out. She just t-t-telled me not to do ju-jumps with s-s-scissors, ‘cuz of s-safety.” His breathing increases to a rapid pace, face flushing red as his chest heaves. “B-But Ms. M-Marion ye-ye-yelled at me!”

Eddie’s brows pinch together, and he gently presses his calloused palms against Harris’s narrow shoulders, desperate to prevent him from hyperventilating. “Harris, you gotta calm down. I can’t understand you when you’re crying like this!” Despite his efforts, his frustration bleeds into his tone, and he winces when the latter sentence ends with an unwanted snap. “Shh, it’s okay. It’s just an art project.”

“Harris?”

The sound of your voice draws the attention of both Munsons. You let out a small oof as Harris flings himself against your legs, and though he practically flew the five foot distance between his father and you, now is not the time to remind him about using his walking feet.

“Hey, hey, what’s going on?” You crouch down, taking his hand in yours, and notice his quick, shallow breaths. “We’re gonna breathe together, okay? Eyes on me.” You demonstrate inhaling for three seconds, holding for three seconds, and exhaling for three seconds. “Now let’s do it together.”

He hesitates but ultimately follows your lead, and you guide him until his breathing slows enough for him to sputter, “I t-tried to sit, b-but I c-couldn’t.”

You haven’t the slightest idea what he’s referring to, but Eddie fills you in. You feel the heat of anger creeping through your body, not just for the way your co-worker treated the sweet boy, but for her insolent approach to teaching as a whole.

“We can go to my classroom,” you offer, silently sighing in relief when the boy nods in agreement. “I don’t know if I have the supplies to make the same project as Ms. Marion, but if you have a few minutes, you can draw something now. I bet Mr. Will would love to help you; he’s a super-duper artist.”

Just as you’d predicted, Will jumps at the opportunity to help Harris with his impromptu art project, encouraging him to draw something that makes him happy. While he does that, you comb through the mess left behind from the Halloween party you’d thrown. You’d sooner toss one hundred cupcake wrappers in the trash before attempting a conversation with Eddie Munson. He’s simply too unpredictable; kind and thoughtful one day, harsh and guarded the next.

One of the wrappers in your hand drops to the floor and you reach forward to pick it up, pinching the pleated material between your pointer and middle fingers. You can feel Eddie’s eyes on your form, the way the backs of your thighs are slightly exposed when you bend over, and you stand up quickly.

“Are you the Magic School Bus lady?” He takes in your lavender dress with planets and stars stamped all over it. Oh. He wasn’t checking you out; he was just trying to figure out who you’d dressed up as. Good. Anything else would be inappropriate.

So why does a twinge of disappointment radiate through you?

You glance at your costume; with all of the commotion, you’d forgotten you’d even been wearing one “I mean, would I even be a teacher if I didn’t jump at the chance to be Ms. Frizzle?” You motion over to Will, decked out in green from head to toe with two yellow horns glued to a headband atop his mop of brown hair. “Have you met my trusty sidekick, Liz the Lizard?”

Eddie laughs. “Yeah, Byers actually used to play in my D&D club back in high school. Made some pretty sick art pieces to liven up that dingy excuse for a room.”

You look between the two of them, trying to do the mental math. “Will, didn’t you say you’re twenty-four?” And if Eddie is thirty, that means…

“I, uh, had a little trouble graduating,” Eddie sheepishly admits, ruffling the back of his hair and offering a tight grimace. “But I got there eventually. Class of ‘86, baby!”

“Worked out for me,” Will shrugs with a grin, looking up from Harris’s drawing. “You were the best DM Hellfire ever had. Although, rumor has it that Erica Sinclair gave you a run for your money.”

Harris picks up a yellow marker, furiously scribbling a circle in the left-hand corner of his paper. You try peering over to see the whole drawing, but he presses his whole body against the table, successfully thwarting your plans. “No peeking!” he warns, not putting his feet back on the ground until you’ve averted your gaze. “‘S a surprise.”

You put your hands up in surrender. “All right, all right. I’ll be surprised.” You raise your eyebrows at Eddie, who shares a similar response in return.

“Dunno when he got so bossy,” he snorts before calling out to his son, “Har-Bear? Five more minutes. We gotta get home to trick-or-treat with Grampa Wayne.”

“Ooh, that sounds like fun!” you echo as Harris grabs a purple marker from the box. “What’s your favorite candy?”

“Hmm.” Harris uses his free hand–the one with the cast–to tap his chin, continuing to color with the other one. “M&Ms. But only the plain ones. Daddy doesn’t let me have the peanut ones ‘cause he says I could choke.”

You shoot a sly, knowing look at Eddie. “I’m sure that’s the only reason. Such a selfless father.” You cross your arms over your chest and cock your head innocently. “And what do you do with all of these confiscated peanut M&Ms, Mr. Munson? Donate them?”

Eddie tucks his lips into his mouth to mask his grin. “Listen, the jig is gonna be up at some point,” he mumbles out of the corner of his mouth, loud enough so you can hear but soft enough that Harris can’t. “Let me enjoy my free candy while it lasts.”

“No judgment here,” you say with a small laugh, “they’re one of my favorites, too.”

“TA-DA!” Harris shouts, startling you, Eddie, and Will. He holds up the construction paper and smiles widely. To anyone without kids–or who didn’t teach preschool for a living–it would look like a bunch of colorful scribbles. But you can tell that he’s drawn a group of people standing by a tree (or a really, really tall flower) underneath the sun.

“Wow, Harris! That’s amazing!” you clap your hands together to punctuate your enthusiasm. “Who are all those people?”

Harris’s pointer finger travels left to right across the paper as he names each person: “That’s me, Grampa Wayne, Daddy, you, and Mr. Will!” The stick figure that represents you has a purple scribble on it, which you realize must be the costume you’re wearing. “An’ we’re all smiling because we’re happy!” Sure enough, each person has a curved red line at the bottom of their face. But there’s something else that catches your eye.

All of the people have a small space between them, except for you and Eddie. The circle that Harris drew to represent your left hand overlaps with the circle that is Eddie’s right.

You glance at the real Eddie, and if he notices, he doesn’t give any indication. “I love it, buddy.” He takes the drawing and inspects it closely. “Yup, this one’s definitely going on the fridge when we get home.” He flicks the paper for good measure. “Go clean up the markers so we can head out, Axl Rose.”

Among the noise of markers clattering back in the bins, you lean in to Eddie, inadvertently inhaling the scent of his cigarettes and cologne. For a brief moment, you’re transported back to the night fate had led you to cross paths; the thought of his lips on your neck in the stairwell has you clenching your thighs and swallowing thickly as you murmur, “I can ask him to make a new one with just you, him, and his grandpa.”

Eddie shakes his head. “N-No. I like this one.” He lets one hand drop to his side and it grazes yours. His rings brush your knuckles, and you instinctively draw back at the sensation of the cool metal and the zing of heat that pulses at his light touch. “Sorry,” he mumbles, not making eye contact.

“S’okay.”

He blinks a few times and redirects his attention to his son. “What do you say to Mr. Will and Ms. Sweetheart for letting you do your art project?”

Harris’s little chest swells as he inhales deeply, storing up as much oxygen as he can fit in his lungs before bellowing, “THANK YOUUUUUUU!”

Eddie brings his palm to his ear canal, rotating his forefinger as though trying to repair a punctured eardrum. “Love the enthusiasm,” he says through gritted teeth. “Seriously, though. Thank you both so much.”

“Of course,” Will says warmly, picking up the marker bin and placing it in its space on the shelf.

“Anything for Harris.” You smile, motioning towards the little boy already by his father’s side. “Have fun trick-or-treating tonight, bud! I can’t wait to hear about all the yummy candy you got.”

Harris scrunches his nose in contemplation. “Are you going trick-or-treating, Ms. Sweetheart?”

“Nah,” you laugh, “I’m gonna stay home and give candy to all the kids who come by.” And pray that Grandma doesn’t curse them out, you silently add.

“Oh.” Harris pauses, grabbing his dad’s hand. “Okay, bye!”

Eddie chuckles as his son pulls him towards the door. “That’s my cue. Um, Happy Halloween,” he adds awkwardly, waving once before disappearing down the hallway.

There’s so much more that he wants to say: you’re the best; you saved the day; you should be my son’s teacher instead of that old, bitchy bat. But he didn’t have time. Maybe another day. At least, that’s what he tells himself.

Wayne arrives just a few minutes after Eddie and Harris get home. As soon as his gruff voice comes over the intercom, Harris excitedly buzzes him in. “Grampa Wayne’s here!” he yells, even though Eddie’s standing right next to him. He grabs the pillowcase from the couch; it was originally white, but after Eddie accidentally threw in a red sock with the white laundry, it’s tinted light pink.

No sooner does the older man cross the threshold into the apartment, Harris is trying to drag him out again. “Let’s go, before all the good candy is gone!” he whines. His eyebrows pinch together and he drops his grandfather’s hand. “Oh, wait, I gotta show you something.” He scampers off into the kitchen, and Wayne winces when he hears the rattle of magnets falling to the floor.

“I’m okay!” Harris calls out, running back with a piece of paper in his hand. “Look what I drawed at school today!” He gives Wayne the rundown of who’s who.

Wayne analyzes each person in the picture, stopping at the overlapping circles between you and Eddie. “This is great, Har-Bear,” he muses. “Are, um, are Daddy and Ms. Sweetheart holding hands?”

“Mhm,” Harris casually confirms, taking the drawing back. “‘Cause they’re married.”

Eddie chokes on air as Wayne does a double-take. “Congrats, Ed,” he jokes, clapping a hand to his nephew’s shoulder. “Gotta say, I thought I’d at least get an invite.”

“Shut up,” Eddie grumbles, rolling his eyes. “Harris, why do you think that Ms. Sweetheart and I are married?” He wracks his brain for answers, but he can’t come to a logical conclusion. Did I talk about her in my sleep? Oh, shit, what if it was when I had that dream—

“Because you gived her a present,” Harris says, eyes innocent and wide. “And when grown-ups love each other, they give each other presents.”

“Oh, he gave Ms. Sweetheart a present, huh?” On the surface, Wayne’s words are as innocuous as Harris’s, but Eddie hears the teasing buried just beneath.

Harris nods. “Mhm. He gived her a tape!”

“It was the Toni Braxton one that she came into the shop for…that day that, uh…” Eddie raises his eyebrows at his uncle, who nods in acknowledgment. He brings his focus back to his son. “It doesn’t mean that we’re married. People have to go on dates and fall in love before they get married.”

The young boy absorbs this information. “So you should go on dates and fall in love with Ms. Sweetheart!” His face lights up at the idea of it, and it breaks Eddie’s heart to let him down.

So, he doesn’t.

“Why don’t you hang that back up so we can get outta here and get you some candy, huh?” He forces a smile and watches his son scamper into the kitchen before turning back to Wayne and shaking his head.

Harris peels a magnet off of the fridge, the one Eddie bought him on their Daddy-Son day. It has a sea lion balancing a beach ball on its snout, with HAWKINS ZOO printed in bolded letters along the bottom.

Lowering his voice to a whisper, he speaks directly to his drawing. “When Daddy and Ms. Sweetheart fall in love and get married, I’ll finally have a mommy.” He presses his hand flat against the paper as though he’s sealing in the wish. He stays like that for a moment until his dad calls his name, and he clutches his pillow case as they head out the door.

Eddie assumes that the love and marriage talk is done for the evening, but the feeling of relief doesn’t last long. The trio of Munson men is halfway down the stairwell when Wayne starts instigating. “Hey, Har, is Ms. Sweetheart pretty?”

“WAYNE!” Eddie grits his teeth and shoots a sharp look at his uncle. The last thing he needs is for Harris to get his hopes up about a blossoming romance between his dad and his former teacher.

“Oh, yeah!” Harris gleefully agrees, oblivious to the mounting tension. He grips the railing and jumps from the second to last step onto the tiled landing below. “Super pretty! Like a princess.”

The eldest Munson turns to Eddie. “Didja hear that? Pretty like a princess.”

“I heard him,” Eddie replies tersely.

“Daddy?”

No. Don’t ask me. Harris Wayne Munson, do not ask me what I think you’re going to—

“Do you think Ms. Sweetheart is pretty?”

Although he anticipated the question, Eddie still freezes. If he disagrees, Harris will inevitably want to know why not. And if he’s being honest with himself, he can’t name a single ugly thing about you.

He does think you’re pretty. He thinks you’re beautiful. Gorgeous. Stunning. And even though he’s literally seen you naked, fully on display for him–a memory he revisits more often than he’s willing to admit–it’s the thought of what you did today that solidifies your beauty. The way you’d effortlessly calmed Harris down without Eddie even having to ask. The frown on his face almost instantly became a smile, the flow of his tears ceasing and turning into the giggles that brought sunlight into Eddie’s life. You did that.

Any woman can be sexy, but you? In that moment, you were perfect.

Fuck.

“Daddy? Hello?”

At the sound of Harris’s voice, Eddie realizes that he physically hasn’t moved from his spot on the stairs. His hand is gripping the banister so tightly that it leaves an imprint in his palm. “Yeah, buddy,” he manages through his Sahara Desert throat. “I think Ms. Sweetheart’s pretty.”

“Like a princess?” Wayne’s eyes twinkle mischievously. It’s been a long time since he’s been able to tease his nephew about a crush, and he’s not passing up this limited opportunity.

“Yeah. Like a princess.”

Education outsiders might think that Halloween is one of the worst days to be a teacher. The lethal combination of sugar and excitement barely contained in tiny costumed bodies seems like a recipe for disaster. But any teacher worth their salt will tell you that there is a day far, far worse than Halloween: November 1st.

On Halloween, there is the expectation for fun. There’s a costume parade, classroom trick-or-treating, and even a little party. The kids are out of control, but who cares? It’s Halloween.

But on November 1st, there is work to be done. And you’re expected to teach the months of the year to 10 four-year-olds who are suffering from candy hangovers and won’t stop asking why they can’t go trick-or-treating again today.

You and Will are preparing for battle as students trickle in, excited to show off the candy stashes they acquired the night before. Abby Carver cries because she ate her Reese’s cup and now she’s sad that it’s gone. Joshua Harrington is continuing to “sling webs” at the other kids despite your incessant reminders that he is no longer Spider-Man. A fight over a KitKat bar breaks out not even five minutes into the day, and you confiscate it before someone causes serious bodily harm.

Two fingers lightly tap on your shoulder—too high up to be a kid—and you whirl around with an irritated, “what?”

“Whoa,” Eddie says, concern etched into his otherwise soft features. He takes a small step back, nearly tripping over a rogue Lego that somehow made its way out of the toy area. He stumbles but catches his balance easily. “Everything okay?”

“‘S a warzone out here,” you try and joke, but you feel it fall flat. You’re too tired for humor. Grandma may not have yelled at the trick-or-treaters like you’d feared, but she did get increasingly angrier with each knock on the door. After the fifth time of her snarling at you to “shut the hell up” (like you could simultaneously be on both sides of the door), you’d relented and just put the candy bowl on the welcome mat, scribbling “TAKE ONE” on a yellow sticky note, adhering it to the plastic container.

Two decades earlier, Halloween at Grandma’s house had a completely different connotation. She’d have a little pizza party all set up for you, and she’d buy a big bag of your favorite candy, in case you didn’t get enough during your door-to-door quests. And she’d always let you watch whatever spooky movie your heart desired, regardless of your parents’ rules.

“That’s what grandmas are for,” she’d said with a wink, and the two of you curled up to watch Little Shop of Horrors. Her demeanor matched the hokey magnet on her fridge that read, If I knew how fun my grandkids would be, I would’ve had them first. You’d stay like that until you both fell asleep, only being roused by your parents arriving to pick you up. The good old days, before Grandma waking up involved watching the confusion in her eyes as she tried and failed to place you.

“C-Can I help you with something?” Your guard goes up immediately when you notice that Harris isn’t with him. The time you’d spent together after school yesterday had been nice, fun, even, but you couldn’t trust that today would be the same. Not after what happened a few short weeks ago.

“I, um…I just swung by to give you this.” He reaches into the inner pocket of his denim jacket; it’s the same one that he lent to Harris when he’d forgotten his at home. A flash of yellow paper catches your eye, and he unfurls his palm to reveal a small bag of peanut M&Ms. “You said they were one of your favorites, right?”

You look at the treat, not willing to reach out and grab it. What if it’s a joke? An elaborate ploy to reel you in, just to shout “gotcha” when you finally let your walls come down?

“Are they poisoned or something?” you quip, crossing your arms over your chest. “Did you spike them with Ex-Lax?”

Eddie’s lips part in surprise before he collects himself. “Guess I deserve that,” he mumbles. “But, no. They’re not. I swear on James Hetfield’s life.” He drags his fingernail over his heart in an X-formation.

You take the bag, inspecting it for any sign of tampering, but you come up short. The edges are sealed, and there are no pinpricks as far as your eyes can see. “Dipped into Harris’s stash for me?”

“Hey, these bad boys are technically mine for the taking until he figures out that he can eat them without dying.” Eddie chuckles lightly, peering at you through impossibly long lashes. “But, yeah, I was hoping you’d accept these as part of my apology. Or apologies, I guess. For, uh, for not calling when I said I would, and all of the awful shi—awful things I said to you.” His voice is barely above a whisper as he steps closer and says, “I am so fucking sorry.”

You make a small tear in the bag, tapping it against your palm until an M&M falls out. Popping the blue candy in your mouth, you allow the shell to start dissolving on your tongue before crunching on the peanut, hoping you can process what he’s said by the time you’re finished chewing.

This is what you’ve been waiting for—an actual heartfelt apology. His brown eyes reflect nothing but shame and remorse, and you can tell by the way that he’s fidgeting with his rings that he’s anxiously awaiting your reply.

His vulnerability softens you slightly, and considering you haven’t keeled over after ingesting the candy, you throw him a bone.

“This fun size bag covers the ‘not calling’ part, but I’m gonna need a lot more candy if you want me to forgive you for what you said at the music store.” You keep your tone light; teasing, even, but there’s a layer of truth to it. He can’t merely waltz into your classroom with a gift and expect you to forget his hurtful words.

Eddie nods, his frizzy curls brushing the tops of his denim-clas shoulders. “I know. I’ve said some pretty terrible things in my life, but that might’ve been the worst. And, um,” he fumbles his words, desperately searching for the right ones. Semantics has never been his forte. “You didn’t deserve that. It’s not true; your grandma didn’t want to forget you. And…neither do I.” When you raise your eyebrows, he starts to backtrack. “Because you’re so great with Harris; like, you understand him and stuff. He’s always talking about you.”

Daddy, do you think Ms. Sweetheart is pretty? The question replays like a song he can’t shake from his head, its melody familiar but the notes still keeping him on edge. Pretty like a princess, only instead of saving her, I’m the one who needs to be rescued. So much for Prince Charming, huh?

The M&M melts in your mouth while you formulate a response to his candid admission. Sweetness seeps into your taste buds as you try to straddle the line between careful consideration and overthinking. Speak too quickly and you might say something you’ll regret. Take too long and you’ll make this even more awkward.

“W-Well, I’m glad to hear that.” Short, simple, to the point. Your words are slightly slurred by the candy obstruction, but what else is there to say? You could add that you forgive him, but you’re truthfully not sure that you do. His words scarred, had taken your already mangled self-worth and snapped it into pieces, and so did his reasoning for hurting you. Despite the love and kindness you’d shown his son, Eddie had fully believed that you were responsible for spreading personal information that would wound him. It was exactly as Jeff had said: Eddie struck below the belt at the first sign of conflict, so determined to protect himself that he didn’t even realize that he was attacking the people on his side.

The sound of books clattering to the floor snatches your attention from him, and you whip your head to your little classroom library to see two kids standing over a pile of fallen books, guilty looks stamped on their faces. “I’ve gotta go,” you blurt out, dashing off to assess the damage. You’ve never been so grateful for your students causing mischief.

The hour hand crawls to the number two; at one point, you swore the clock was moving backwards. The chaos of the morning was only a preview of the rest of the day’s fiascos, but you and Will had navigated as best as you could.

“Jesus,” he murmurs once the kids have all been dismissed, gingerly rubbing his temples, “that was brutal. I can handle the day after Halloween; I can handle Fridays, but when they coincide? Nope, never again.” He slumps into a chair dramatically, letting his arms drape over the sides.

“Gonna have a glass of wine when you get home?” you joke, wiping Play-Doh residue from a tabletop.

Will nods. “Or a whole bottle.” His focus shifts to your desk, and he nods his chin in that direction. “I see you have something to look forward to tonight, too.”

You follow his gaze, widening your eyes when you see the object he’s referring to. A bag of peanut M&Ms–much bigger than the one you’d inhaled this morning–sits on top of your desk calendar; resting next to it is a cassette. You walk over, curiosity getting the better of you. The cassette is Guns N’ Roses’ Appetite for Destruction; you recognize the iconic cover as soon as it comes into view. It’s not your usual music choice, but you’ll listen to almost anything.

There’s a piece of paper taped to the giant yellow M&M bag, folded in equal triads. Messily scrawled across the front in black ink is Ms. Sweetheart. You gently pull the adhesive loose and open the letter, nervously running your forefinger across the irregular edge where it was obviously torn from a composition notebook.

Fun size mistake=fun size bag of candy

Family size mistake=family size bag of candy

I’m really good at fucking things up, but really bad at fixing them. I wish I could say that I didn’t mean to hurt you, but we both know that I did.

You don’t have to forgive me, but I need you to know how sorry I am.

-Eddie

P.S. Not sure if hard rock is your thing, but I saw this at work and it reminded me of the kindness you showed our favorite little Axl Rose yesterday.

“Who’s it from?” Will asks, breaking into your thoughts. “A secret admirer?” He brings his clasped hands to his cheek in mock dreaminess.

You manage a laugh as you fold the note back up and tuck it under the calendar. “If it is, he’s really bad at it, because he signed his name.” When did he even sneak in here to do this? Kind of scary that someone could walk in and you didn’t even notice.

“Aha! So it is a guy!” Will pumps his fist triumphantly, though you’re not quite sure what he thinks he’s won.

“Just Eddie Munson, thanking us for letting Harris draw here yesterday.”

It’s not a total lie, but Will sees right through it. “Uh-huh. Thanking us? So that note is also for me? Can I read it?” He starts towards your desk, outstretched hand reaching towards where you’d tried to hide it, but you playfully swat them away.

You glance at the clock and frown. “If you leave a little early, I won’t tell anyone.”

Will flips you off; over the last two months, you two had developed a sibling-esque relationship that came out more once the kids had left for the day. He grabs his backpack from the supply closet and slings it over his shoulders. “You’re lucky I’m exhausted, or I’d stick around and keep bothering you.”

“Yeah, yeah.” You roll your eyes, knowing full well that he’s itching to leave regardless. “Gotta save up your energy for when Marshall visits.”

Will blushes at the mention of his long-distance boyfriend’s name. He still wasn’t out to many people, but when you’d casually mentioned the date Jess had with a girl named Robin, he’d felt comfortable opening up to you. “I can’t wait!” His grin is so wide you swear it’ll stretch right off of his face. “Thanks again; you’re the best.”

That leaves you alone with your gigantic bag of candy, a Guns N’ Roses cassette, and an apology that you have no idea what to do with.

Once again, Eddie Munson has given you more questions than answers.

taglist:

@kelsiegrin @lma1986 @munsonology @stuckontheceiling @avobabe87 @eddapwinchester @peachysink @browneyes8288 @jeremyspoke-inclasstoday

@breezybeesposts @wednesdaymunson @feltonswifesworld87 @take-everything-you-can @bebe07011 @krahk @81rain @dylanmunson @oscarisaacwhore @eddiesguitarskills @everheart12 @etherealglimmer @hollster88 @wh0re4life @siriuslysmoking

@bibieddiesgf @theactualf0ck @winchester-angel @starlitlakes @avalon-wolf @hazydespair @josephquinncore @daydreaminglisa @sidthedollface2 @eddiebaemunson @mandyjo8719 @daydreaming-mood @aol19 @corkadymu @starcourtnights @eggo-segual @rockstarmunsons @metalhead-succubus @boinkybarness @oohworldofpisces @costellation-hunter @toobsessedsstuff @meadow20 @theweasleyskettle @lost-in-the-stars03 @elizabethmidnight2017 @aysheashea

@chamomileh0ney @dream-a-little-nightmare @emma77645 @kurdtbean @sheneedsrocknroll92 @tlclick73 @luceneraium @lolly-in-a-strange-land @dylanmunson @bakugouswh0r3

@strangerthingsstories5255 @imaginexred @haylaansmi @adaydreamaway08 @itsalltaken @harmfulb1tch @mimischaos @averagemisfit03 @steddiegarbage @vigilanteshit @ellendemeyer152 @sierrahhh @stevesmunson @hiscrimsonangel @ffrvtvt @mrsjellymunson @idkatee @quentinswife

#eddie munson #eddie stranger things #eddie x reader #eddie x you #eddie munson x female reader #eddie munson x f!reader #eddie munson x you #eddie munson smut #eddie munson angst #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson fanfic #stranger things fanfic #fanfic #eddie munson stranger things #stranger things #tui

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draconesmundi · 9 months

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Dracones Mundi infographics to explain some of the dragon design features in my project :3

Image IDs in alt text or below the cut:

A labelled diagram depicting a dragon’s head. Labels are: ear slit. Wattle on horn that looks like an ‘ear’. Dorsal finlets made of thick skin. Overlapping osteoderms like Vancleavea (accompanied by Vancleavea fossil photo). Overall appearance inspired by pseuedosuchians, including extant crocodiles (accompanied by skeletal mount of Prestosuchus and a photo of a baby Nile crocodile). Smoother scales on belly for sliding though mud into bodies of water. ‘Beard’ or jaw wattle of thick skin. Rear venom fang, full of cytotoxic venom. The dragon can ‘spit’ like a spitting cobra, and the cytotoxins are similar to those found in puff adder venom. Lots of different snakes inspire dragon venom (accompanied by diagram of snake skull).

A dragon family tree accompanied by a paragraph of text. Text reads: There is a lot of morphological diversity in Dracones Mundi – dragons all evolved from a type of pseudosuchian, and had a basic ‘four legs and a long tail' body plan. Many families have atrophied their hind limbs, many have small legs and more serpentine shape. Dragon wings are not limbs, but patagium spread between osteoderm spokes, so there is a diversity in wing size and function (display, thermoregulation, camouflage) beyond gliding (only the flying serpent family really use them for gliding…). Flight is achieved by magic.

The dragons on the family tree are: turtle dragons, such as the cucafera. Firedrakes, azhdar and long are in one family. ‘Beast dragons’ such as the tatzelwyrm. ‘Feathered serpents’ such as coameh. Wyverns and cockatrices. Flying serpents or ‘amphitheres’. Wyrms and serpents. Sea serpents and lake monsters.

#Dracones Mundi #Dragons #Speculative Biology #Speculative Evolution

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maniculum · 4 months

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Bestiaryposting Results: Hraetnug

We've got a good variety of results here, so I'm just going to run through the usual stuff and get to them.

If anyone isn't sure what this "bestiaryposting" thing is about, you can find an explanation and previous entries at https://maniculum.tumblr.com/bestiaryposting.

All of the art below is based on this entry:

If you want to participate, next week's bestiaryposting will be based on this entry:

And the art is below the cut:

@silverhart-makes-art (link to post here) decided something with wings that doesn't fly might well be a flightless bird, and has drawn a very good penguin/auk/thing. I really like how it's posed against the starry sky; it's evocative. For additional details, check the linked post.

@ectocs (link to post here) thought of sea turtles instead -- which I can totally see. I've had the good fortune to witness a few sea turtle hatchings, and the description of the eggs in the sand absolutely tracks. However, there's the issue that the idea of wing-shaped fins is not compatible with "its feet are like those of a camel" -- hence the very cool shell design. I like it; it's quite clever. The linked post contains some additional discussion of the thoughts and inspirations behind this design, go look at it. (Also, thank you for providing alt text.)

@cheapsweets (link to post here) has taught me a new word with this post -- xerocolous. Also, we have a medieval-style dragon here, complete with that ubiquitous wavy-eared head -- it does fully fit the description, too. Always appreciate a little medieval styling; those damned ears made me smile. There's additional explanation in the linked post -- also, thank you for providing alt text.

@sweetlyfez (link to post here) has laid out a brief but excellent explanation of their design process. It seems to have gone like this:

"What animals do this with their eggs?" "Snakes do that." "But snakes don't have wings or camel-like feet." "This one does."

Brilliant. Love it. No notes. (Also thank you for providing alt text.)

@pomrania (link to post here) also went with "flightless bird" and admits the inadvertent resemblance of their design to Big Bird -- it does have a certain Muppet-like quality, I must say. For additional information, please see the linked post. I particularly like the note that giving it a "no thoughts head empty" facial expression was fully intentional.

@coolest-capybara (link to post here) also thought of sea turtles and then questioned how this could be compatible with the camel feet. Their solution, which I think came out extremely well here, was to simply draw a camel/turtle hybrid. I kind of love this design -- and, of course, the stylized art.

@strixcattus (link to post here) has drawn a very charming flightless bird. I really like the sort of shaggy design, which I assume is indicative of kiwi-style feathers. As is normally the case, Strixcattus has also included a modern naturalist-style interpretation of the animal, which I, as usual, recommend reading via the linked post.

To the Aberdeen Bestiary...

Once again, this is basically the same bird we see in a bunch of these, with the exception of its (surprisingly accurate) camel-like feet. However, this is in fact the ostrich. (I have no idea why one of them appears to be eating the eggs.)

I honestly don't have a lot to add here. Bit surprising to see a different set of myths about the ostrich rather than the "head in the sand" thing.

#maniculum bestiaryposting #hraetnug

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otterloreart · 13 days

Note

Art Prompts:

1-TV Headed Men

2-Moth Dolls

3-Planet Themed Mermaids

4-Milkshake Dragons

5-Ice Cream Themed Superheroes

6-More Magical Pony Art (I Love Them!!)

7-Ocean Themed Space Aliens

8- Sea Snakes (They’re awesome! Here’s a link to an article about them: https://blog.padi.com/sea-snake-facts/)

9-Snakes With Prosthetic Arms

10-An Otter With A Cute Little Bow In Her Head

I got way inspired by the sea snake prompt apparently and spent way more time than I meant to on them! I included the whip snake (highly stylized) as an example of a "land snake" (opened up one of my herp books to a random page).

If they were toys like the other snake designs they would include stands to represent the fact theyre "swimming" whereas the land snakes would have slightly more flat bottoms so they can "stand". The sea kraits have round bodies with flatter tails while the seasnakes have vertically oval bodies.

These designs are not 100% accurate to real snakes, obvi, they're artistic reinterpretations of the snakes design. For ex: the whip snake has a stripe, but also has very distinct scales, so I made them diamonds. And the eyelash shapes are just for cuteness.

ok facts about sea snakes I want to add to clarify some things stated in that article (just adding my own knowledge/clarifying things (PLEASE do not take offense to this i am glad to read facts about snakes i just have brain worms when it comes to snakes))

put under cut because it was getting too long

"to keep things simple" isn't... right: theyre split into different categories because they're separate evolutionary lines! And there are a handful of other differences (although the article does go into those later, but ngl thats why i dont like lists organized this way). Anyways, it makes it sound like these categories are not relevant to the evolutionary history imo

I would have clarified that while they all do have paddle like tails, the kraits actually have bodies more similar to land snakes, whereas the true sea snakes have vertically elongated bodies to make swimming easier and are bad at being on land.

Okay so this is true mostly EXCEPT we built a huge canal through panama and there have been sightings of sea snakes on the "wrong" side of the panama canal, specifically yellow-bellied sea snakes which live on the pacific side. There are no breeding populations, but due to human intervention there's potential risk of them being introduced.

See this is why I was like the categories aren't for "simplicity", the sea kraits are separated from the other sea snakes because of their many differences: a major one being that they come on land to lay eggs! A number of snakes all over the world give birth (though yes, not in the ocean) to fully formed (not "nearly") babies!

I would just add that this is part of why they can't cross over to the Atlantic! here's a paper!

...all snakes are carnivores (hence, weird thing to say)? unless you count eating eggs as being "not a carnivore". in which case this would be untrue because the turtle-headed seasnakes (genus Emydocephalus) eat primarily fish eggs!

and this one isn't quite right because of turtle-headed seasnakes again! They have almost no teeth except tiny fangs and as far as I can find are either mildly venomous or nonvenomous. since they dont hunt their venom glands are vestigial.

Sea snakes and kraits are elapids, which include other highly venomous snakes like cobras, coral snakes, and all of the highly venomous Australian species!

While doing research on realistic snake plushies, sea snakes made by WildRepublic were one of the major clear attempts at a retailer trying to be scientifically accurate.

Kraits DO actually look like cartoon animals

and yeah the olive sea snake does really look like that:

(although the olive one has apparently been taken off their website?)

although the way they title and tag their products continues to piss me off to no end, like this is an EEL not a SNAKE, they're just out here spreading misinformation and confusing things.

they completely rebranded in like 1999 because their wildlife plushies took off so personally I think they have a responsibility now to scientific accuracy since they took on that mantle. but i digress.

#sea snakes #my art #snake art #snake facts #ummmmm that was a lot im done now #reptiblr

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eternal-moss · 6 months

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MY MORAX DRAGON PLUSH WAS UP AGAINST THE RADIATOR AND NOW HE’S SO WARM AND LOVELYYY. Hm… actually…

I wonder if his dragon form is an endotherm or not… I suspect Neuvillette’s is, he seems primarily mammalian based (he still has horns and a tail). I don’t know whether or not Zhongli is, I think the consensus for more reptilian dragons is that they’re ectothermic, like Apep & Ourobaxi, but for Chinese dragons I’m not sure.. he has some reptilian features like his main snake-like body having scales, and his claws are probably reptilian not avian. He also has antlers and a beard/mane which are features that endotherms would have, and whiskers which are probably most similar to fish (ectotherm) whiskers (sometimes called barbels)

Dvalin too is one that’s confusing, and I think he actually might be even more bird/mammal based. His body is covered in fur and feathers, and only really has scales at his head and feet. I originally imagined him to be like typically European dragons (ie. probably an ectotherm that reptilian like) but if anything he seems to be mainly bird-like, especially his tail. The material of his wings though is so confusing! It’s hard to tell whether there’s feathers or if it’s even butterfly-esque wings!! I’m tentatively putting him as warm blooded.

Azhdaha is probably cold blooded, although his body is heavily affected by the elements, and he even has a tree growing out of his tail… the designers of Azhdaha said he was inspired by many things (being crocodile-like, as well as based on a ‘quadruped toad’, Komodo dragon, alligator snapping turtle and stegosaurus) but they all are ectotherms.

Both Ursa the Drake and Durin (though he seems to have had a very damaged body even when he was alive) are much more based on typical European dragons than Dvalin, and appear to both be cold blooded too.

So my guess is this:

MOST LIKELY TO BE WARM-BLOODED

-Neuvillette (there’s a chance he might be more like a serpent, but he’s also designed very similarly to Fontaine otters. His ladle- very presumably based on his dragon- doesn’t give us many details either. He has horns & a tail that looks like a fluke (aquatic mammal tail) rather than a fish tail (caudal fin). So my guess is warm blooded!)

-Dvalin (bird/mammal/potentially insect type)

-Morax/Zhongli/Deus Auri <- this might be his oldest title, it precedes him being the Geo Archon by several thousand years. (Chinese dragon- 龙/龍 type. If anyone knows whether they’re official warm or cold blooded please tell me!)

MOST LIKELY TO BE COLD BLOODED

-Ursa & Durin (European reptilian type)

-Azhdaha (mixed reptile/amphibian type)

-Apep & Ourobaxi (fully serpent types)

???

-Elynas (probably cold blooded, Rhine seems to make that kind. Melusines are confusing biologically, but how similar he is to them is unknown. His projected spirit looks like one, but his corpse/skeleton is like Durin. Melusines look potentially mammalian but also have rhinophores… then again they sometimes have small wings. Real life melusines are a mix of human & sea serpent. So like. I really don’t know what category to put them in)

#Genshin impact #Long post #Hahaha loong post. Get it. Cause… 🐉….#Zhongli #Azhdaha #钟离 #Dvalin #Durin #Elynas #Apep #Ourobaxi #Ourobashi #Ouroboros #Ursa the Drake #Neuvillette #Morax #Biology posting #Yeah. Putting my autistic post about dragons and not revising for my actual Biology a level. Smart.#If you’re wondering why I like dungeon meshi. And why I relate to Falin and Laios. Can you tell why now.

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ac3-76 · 5 months

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Cole Brookstone Headcannons

warnings: slight cussing? mentions of racial stereotypes/discrimination

General

He was the sexiest man alive 3 years in a row

He also dabbled in modeling

he didn't even try either, a modeling agent saw him and gave him a business card

Cole went to one interview, the next thing he knows he's walking down the runway with Bella Hadid

he's a thought son

does a lot of stuff on social platforms to spread awareness for racial discrimination, politics, and cancer reaserch

if they were to have BLM protests in Ninjago, he would throw tear gas back at cops

He has the BIGGEST resting bitch face ever

obviously he loves cake, but he loves brownies with caramel drizzle and a sprinkle of sea salt on top even more than he loves cake

he really loves Dolly Partons Carmel Turtle mix

He loves Dolly Parton in General

He only drinks water

He HATES those "make my water of the day with me" videos

like JUST DRINK WATER THROUGH OUT THE DAY!?! HELLO?!

Gossip/debrief sessions with Nya are a weekly occurrence

the reason Nya was so confused abt Jay vs Cole in season 3/4/5 is because of how close Nya and Cole already were

But after she stepped away from both of them and thought about her relationship with each of them, she realized Cole was like a sister to her

And I mean sister

She's never had a sister before but her relationship with Cole is exactly how she imagines sister relationships

Nya introduces him as her sister and he's chill with it

He works out with Kai

but unlike Kai, Cole LOVES rest days

he goes to yoga 3 or 4 times a week and is besties with his yoga instructor Andy

Andy and her girlfriend got married and he went to the wedding, that's how close they are

I feel like he's friends with a lot of lesbians

idk they just kinda gravitate towards him

Cole is 6'3

he's also black

he has snake bite piercings

his mom's favorite tree was a maple tree, so he got a maple leaf tattooed behind his right ear

his mom would always tuck his braids or dreads behind his right ear.

he also has a hand tattoo that looks something like this:

I'm not saying Ninjago has a lot of racial stereotypes or discrimination

but, when they see 6'3, muscular, tatted, pierced, black. resting bitch face Cole walking down the street people tend to label him as scary or dangerous

because of this he's always afraid of coming off as creepy or weird when he tries to talk to someone

Dating

His body is so large, solid, and muscular and it's perfect for hugs and cuddling

He doesn't care about cuddling position- if you guys are comfortable and can fall asleep, its perfect

his favorite place to kiss is your forehead and your shoulders

his love language is acts of service

"my room is too bright in the morning, even with my blinds shut" the next day he has blackout curtains installed

"I always hit my head on that one cabinet" idk how but thanks to his handy work you no longer bump your head on that cabinet

"I wish my kitchen had sodalite counters" You have sodalite counters now(the good thing is, it was mostly free too, he just used his earth powers to find enough sodalite for your counter)

You guys met when the ninjas went out to a restaurant to celebrate whatever victory they had just had

and because he's used to being stereotyped as scary or weird for the way he looks, when you approached him to ask for his number he was shocked and supprised

he was happy about it tho because he had been glancing at you the whole time the team was at the restaurant

You're first date? Mini golfing.

He's been thinking about the perfect first date FOR. YEARS.

why is mini golfing the perfect first date?

Public setting for both parties feeling safe

mini golfing is fun and fairly inexpensive

mini golfing provides plenty of time to talk and chat, but if an awkward moment arises there's something to do

done golfing and now we're hungry?

cheap and decent food inside

done eating but don't want to end the date?

most mini golf places have arcades

AND most arcade games are meant for 2 people

want to take some cute photos?

Most arcades have photo booths for taking cute pics

Cole has been planing a mini golfing first date for years, and just needed someone with the right energy to do it with

Romcom type relationship

You guys meet in a cute romcomy way, have a cute romcomy first date, then you have some sort of romcomy problem, then work things out and live happily ever after

I feel like the romcomy problem wouldn't be very romcomy tho, maybe you guys met before he was a ghost, and him being a ghost was the problem you worked through?

he would keep 1 flower from every boquet he gives to you so he knows when the bouquet is dying, then he gets you fresh flowers

You always have fresh flowers from him, for the entirety of ur relationship

he's a thought son so you would stay up talking about what you guys want your future to look like

He's used to you waking him up in the middle of the night because he was snoring

He gives great advice, but before he gives it he asks if you want comfort or advice

he's also really good at comforting you

he just knows exactly how to make you feel safe and understood

you'd go to yoga with him, Andy and her girlfriend(now wife) would love you

if you guys did want kids, Cole would be the perfect dad

Physical touch is his 2nd love language, but he doesn't rlly like PDA

most touches in public are pinky or hand holding(he would do the thumb thing), putting his hand on the small of your back when going through crowds, maybe a peck on the temple here and there

but in private he can't get his hands off you

he just wants to touch you in any and every way possible

he's infatuated by you

he sends you tiktoks of an orange cat(him) and some other cat(color/type depending on ur personality) and says us

he sends you couple trends and says "we should do this"

"if I every won the lottery, oh wait, I already did" yeah. he did that, first 2 slides were him, and the other 30 were pics of you

"oh that's pretty, imma take a picture" yep.

he has life 360 with you

not in a weird way, obvi, in like a oh this fun way

You're like the parents of the team

Jay and Nya are the uncle and aunt

In another universe the four of you are drinking wine and talking about how annoying some coworkers have been recently

#ninjago cole #cole brookstone #ninjago #ninjago headcanons #cole brookstone headcannons #ninjago cole headcannons

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a-book-of-creatures · 11 months

Note

trick or treat :3

Why, it's one (1) turtle-headed sea snake!

#trick or treat #snakes

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shuttershocky · 6 months

Note

actually this is a good chance to get to know you a bit better. top 3 animals, top 3 colors, top 3 games

Top 3 Animals

1) Crocodiles — There used to be many saltwater crocodiles back in my mom's province. These are the largest reptiles in the world so just seeing them (from a very far, safe distance away) is pretty awe-inspiring. One of these was so gargantuan we put a replica of its skeleton on display in the national museum in Manila, hung over the lobby. We also have Philippine Crocodiles which are endemic to the country, but I've only seen juvenile ones at a zoo since they're endangered and all.

2) Turtles — There are very few experiences like being on the beach and seeing a sea turtle in the wild. One time we were on a fishing boat and someone screamed, I thought for sure it meant someone spotted a shark, but when I leaned over to look, there was a sea turtle poking its head out right above the coral reefs to watch us. There's not many perks to living in the tropics, but this is one of them.

3) Kulasisi — These are very tiny parrots (I think the smallest in the world even?) that aren't common, but can be found virtually anywhere. One of my favorite classes back in college was birdwatching, where one of our sessions found a couple nesting pairs right outside one of the buildings. It was because of that class that I realized it was a Kulasisi that was making the bird calls I would hear when getting up in the morning to go to class

Top 3 Colors

1) Purple — My grandmother's favorite color, and mine eventually. I used to be a blue person until I shifted to darker purple and violet as I got older

2) Blue — I still like it

3) Black — I really liked the Matrix

Top 3 Games

I'm a big gamer (enough that I went into gamedev for a living despite everything) so this is probably the most malleable list. I'm not difficult to please and generally like a lot of stuff, so a top 3 favorite games list could look very different each time, barring one game.

1) Dota 2 — I have over 5000 hours in my favorite game of all time. Picked it up in 2012, and then it was all over for me. I can go stretches of up to 6 months without touching the game, but when I reopen it, the hype comes flooding back.

2) Devil May Cry 5 — I continue to hold the opinion that DMC5 hit the platonic ideal of stylish action game design, V's lack of depth notwithstanding. The game has been out for 5 years and people are still uploading new runs, finding all these tricks and secrets in the game just as they did with DMC3 and 4 before it. If Dante only got wall running and Wild Stomp back from 3, it might be as close to perfect as you can get. Devil Trigger and Bury The Light are also among my favorite video game songs of all time, among the likes of Killer Instinct's or Metal Gear Rising's

3) Metal Gear Solid 4 — MGS3 is the better game, MGS1 and 2 are more iconic, but MGS4 rescued the PS3 from irrelevancy before Uncharted 2 made it big. Holy shit that game looked unbelievably good when it first came out. The way Snake would lie still and camouflage into the floor while bullets sprayed the ground right in front of him while mooing mechs and soldiers were mere feet away blew my mind.

Games like Resident Evil 4 three years earlier really popularized making cinematic cutscenes that were rendered in-game rather than pre-rendered, but I didn't realize the possibilities behind it until MGS4's Raiden vs Vamp. A complex action scene where Raiden and Vamp had a sword duel would always be cool, but what pushed it over the top was that you kept playing the whole time it was happening. MGS4 would split the screen, playing the cutscene in one half, while in the other you had to carry on with your mission, and goddamn that sure was a moment of thinking "Wow this really is next gen"

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neonponders · 1 year

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Part 36 for @wrecked-fuse ‘s pocketverse ~

( A special honorable mention to @akioukun for this one 🦈 )

Part 35 (main plot)

Part 31 & 32 (werewolf!Billy chapters haha)

( pt. 7′s art 🎩 ) ( pt. 9′s art 👀 ) ( pt. 14′s art 💨 ) ( pt. 19′s art 🦇 ) ( pt. 20′s art 🍳) ( pt. 27’s art 🦦 )

~ on ao3 ~

• • •

Little Steve slumped against Billy’s shirt pocket, giggling himself into a stupor as they made their way through the sea lion exhibit. Small Billy looked up at his bigger self and worried, “Is he brwoken?”

“Yeah, what’s going on, chipmunk? Don’t lose your nuts.”

Big Steve’s brows stitched together at that, but then his little gulped air to say, “The sea wions look wike you, Biwwy. So sweepy and handsome.”

The bigger Steve’s eyes blew wide and he put a finger over his lip. “It’s the mustache. I get it.”

Billy’s features flattened, making him look like an annoyed sea lion in the headlights while his smaller self laughed but scratched his hairless upper lip.

They saw everything the aquarium had to offer - minus the crabs. Chrissy grabbed Eddie’s hand and marched right through that exhibit. Little Steve and Billy cooed and awed at the various dark tunnels with brightly lit enclosures. It was less easy to keep small Eddie confined when some of the rooms were designed to look like enclosures themselves.

“Is this wreal?” he asked, flying up to touch a wall that looked like rock and moss. “Metal! Firwst goth shawrks, and now we’wre the animals! This place rocks!”

Bigger Eddie’s nostrils flared, but Chrissy gently intervened, “Eds, can you sit on my bun? It’s gonna be a while before we have lunch.”

He swooped through the darkness to use the topknot on her head like the back of a chair. With Eddie mollified, he could better focus on small Chrissy. He cupped his hands, lifting her up to better see various animals. It didn’t take long for small Eddie to join the higher vantage point, but he seemed just as pleased to flutter his wings behind him, feeling the air without exhausting himself.

They arrived to a room with walls of fish as well as a central pillar of glass and tropical fish. Steve walked a lazy lap around the room before approaching Billy with the idea to give their littles a similar, higher view, but as soon as his mouth opened, he went quiet. Billy held a hand over his pocket as he silently gazed up at the pillar of colorful coral and striped fish. Little Billy and Steve held onto his forefinger, but the latter had an arm around small Billy, brown hair nuzzling blond.

Steve smiled softly, watching the blue veins of light wander over the little guys before he saw how the same light glowed in Billy’s water-blue eyes. Long lashes blinked sharply when Steve stroked the back of Billy’s other hand. “You want to hit the gift shop and grab some food?”

“Yeah. Take the guys, though. I’m gonna buy an overpriced coffee from concessions.”

“Make it two?”

Billy smirked in his sleepy way at him. “Six sugars?”

“No,” Steve groaned as the littles switched from Billy’s pocket to his own. “...Just two. And a cream.”

Billy snorted softly. “I know how you take your coffee. See you in the gift shop.”

Steve and the others meandered to the contrastingly bright shop while Billy went to the small cafeteria. Steve expected the little ones to be dozing in his shirt, but upon arriving at shelves upon shelves of animal plushies, they proved very much awake. The gasp from his shirt made Steve look nervously down.

“They’wre - they!” small Billy exclaimed, head swiveling between the turtles, snakes, and whales.

“Hold on,” Steve stymied. “We’re not taking all of these home.”

“Why not?” small Steve clipped.

“Because they’re not all for us, and frankly, I can’t afford all of them.”

“But otterws! ” his little argued, pointing to the shelf of them in various sizes.

“I know. This is where I got the one you sleep with. Let’s just relax and breathe for a second. We’re not grabbing anything until we take a lap.”

“What for?” small Billy interrogated.

Thankfully, Chrissy came to his rescue. “So we can see everything and make sure you’re getting the best thing.”

By some miracle, the store clerk was elsewhere, possibly on lunch break. So when small Eddie pulled out a shark plushie and the ensuing shelf following suit, he had a small audience. The weight of the shark pulled him right down, but he had a soft landing.

Eddie might be the rigid one in the pair, but he proved surprisingly gentle as he picked his smaller self up and supported his wings. “Hey, butthead. You okay?”

“I think I pulled a wing.” His tiny bottom lip pushed up like he might cry.

“Nothing Wayne’s bacon mac can’t fix. Just take it easy.”

“The mac ‘n’ cheese with the stawrs?”

“I don’t know if we have the star pasta, but we’ll get some on our way home.”

“And Coco Puffs?”

“You’re milkin’ me dry here, man.”

Chrissy giggled. “I’ll cover the Coco Puffs.”

On Steve’s side of the store, Billy arrived and handed him a small coffee. He eyed the menagerie of toys on the floor. “What’s going on?”

“Just a minor injury,” Steve said as he risked sipping the hot coffee. “Thanks.”

“Biwwy.” The man looked at little Steve, who posed, “We’wre taking a shawrk home, right?”

Billy blinked and clarified, “A toy one. Not a real one.”

The small guys stared at him and then pivoted to murmur to each other as if that hadn’t even occurred to them -

Steve interjected, “Not a real one. We’re not putting a shark in the pool.”

Steve didn’t realize he might have walked into a trap until little Billy pointed and said, “Then that one!”

A shark plushie about the size of their otter hung off the shelf, almost a victim of little Eddie’s mess. Steve picked it up and tested the soft, pliant toy. But right next to them were much smaller versions of animals that could fit in his hand. He held two sharks in his hands and reasoned, “You already have the otter to sleep on. Do you want a shark you can hold or a shark that can hold you?”

This was not the right thing to say.

The littles went very quiet. Steve peered down at his shirt and saw his littler self with big, sad eyes and confused, upturned brows. Like he couldn’t understand why they had to make a choice.

Little Billy was silently having a meltdown. The whites of his eyes went pink as they slowly filled and filled with tears.

Steve quietly interpreted, “Both. Okay, okay. You’re not in trouble. I’m just trying to not take home the whole store. You can have both.”

He looked to large Billy for input or just plain help, but the man stayed quiet. If anything, he looked uncomfortable and ready to leave -

“Stevie?” small Billy asked.

“Yeah?” small Steve answered.

“Would you sweep with me on the shawrk? Or stay on the otterw?”

Big Steve’s eyes flicked between them, trying to understand what the real question was.

“I’wll sweep with you anywhere, Biwwy. Shawrk or otterw. You’wre my Biwwy.”

The tears slipped over his chubby cheeks and he said. “I want the smawll shawrk. I wanna hold him. Stevie can hold me.”

Big Steve stood frozen in place, unsure what just happened and totally overwhelmed. Billy finally did something and took the larger black-tipped reef shark out of his hand and carried the smaller version to the register. Steve mutely followed, busy trying to get a tissue package out of his jacket pocket to clean up small Billy...

A loud clatter jerked his eyes up to a small, bronze-looking otter figurine keychain. Billy looked around at the vacancy of a store clerk and said to nobody in particular, “Should we shoplift?”

Steve didn’t answer that and instead asked, “I thought you’d have gone something shark-themed, too.”

“I already have one.”

“One what?”

“A shark.”

“Really?” Steve puzzled. “Where? I didn’t see anything in your room.”

For a moment, he wondered if he’d said the wrong thing again, because the muscle in Billy’s jaw bulged. “He was in the laundry room when you were over. He doesn’t get to come out all that often.”

A cashier finally arrived, speed walking behind the counter. “Hi! So sorry, I hope you weren’t waiting long.”

“Slow day,” Billy said indifferently, but promptly ripped the tags off. “I don’t need a bag.”

They got out of the way for Eddie and Chrissy to make their purchases, and Billy opened his jacket to insert the shark into his breast pocket in front of the littles. “Tuck in, Snorkels.”

“Snorkels?” Steve overheard with a snort.

“That’s Mr. Snorkels to you.”

“Mr.,” he blurted but then recoiled at the severity on Billy’s face. “Wait, really?”

Billy didn’t answer. He prowled his way out of the aquarium, into the balmy afternoon after so much air conditioning as Steve followed behind him.

“When can I meet him?”

“Excuse me?”

“You know my stuffed animal. Why can’t I know yours?”

A smile cracked on Billy’s face. “Oh, you want to meet my shark?”

“I already met him. I want to meet Mr. Snorkels.”

Billy made a pfft sound as he worked on putting his new keychain on his keys. Whatever the attitude he gave Steve, the small brass otter had to be a good sign...right?

“You promised me food.”

Steve took that for what it is, an end to the conversation. Rolling his eyes, he surrendered, “Sandwiches or burritos?”

#harringrove #wrecked-fuse #neonponders #akioukun #pocketverse #pocket!au #like magnets

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aliciavance4228 · 2 months

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Here Are Some Things From Greek Mythology That Are Purely Nightmare Fuel

Note: Long post because Greek Mythology is completely fucked up.

-Many of the monsters:

The Lernaean Hydra (a serpent with nine heads, that can continually regrow severed heads).

The Chimera (a hideous amalgamation of a lion, a goat and a dragon)

Cerberus (a vicious three-headed dog that in some myths had a back covered in living serpents).

Orthrus (Cerberus's two-headed, serpent-tailed little brother), and various other creatures definitely count.

Perhaps the worst is Typhon — father of the above along with the Mother of All Monsters, Echidna — Typhon is described by some writers as being as tall as the sky itself, and having a hundred dragon-like heads, all of which screamed and breathed fire. It's not hard to see why almost all the gods had a collective fear when he appeared, and fled Greece, leaving Zeus to face the creature by himself.

And then there's creatures like Scylla and, even worse, Charybdis, once beautiful women turned into eldritch things of pure horror. Scylla we at least know is horrifying to observe, looking like a giant, beautiful women from the waist up, with a scaled tail below, and the heads of six rabid wolves snapping at her waist.

Medusa, whose face was apparently so frightening that anyone who saw her turned into stone. Much like Scylla and Charybdis above, she also used to be a beautiful woman before the Gods transformed her, except when she was a monster from the beginning.

-Prometheus' fate of being chained to a rock and having an eagle peck out his liver each day. He endured it for hundreds of years before being released.

-Similarly, the fate Chiron faced before he sold his immortality: living forever, with the maddening poison of the Hydra eternally burning through his veins.

-The fate of mortals unfortunate enough to piss off the gods:

Actaeon, a man who accidentally walked in on a bathing Artemis, who turned him into a deer and had him killed by his own dogs.

Erysichthon, who chopped down one of Demeter's trees, was infected with eternal hunger and eventually ate himself.

Phineas, son of Poseidon, was randomly gifted with the ability to perceive past and future. This access to knowledge threatened the gods so Zeus struck him blind and further punished him with starvation by being attacked by Harpies every time he tried to eat. It’s a good thing that Jason came along and, with the aid of the Argonauts, was able to kill the Harpies so Phineas could eat again- some depictions have him so starved that he’s horrifically thin.

So, you're friends with Aphrodite, and she want to marry you, eldest son of Nereus, old man of the sea. That's good, right? Well, dad says no. You tell your girlfriend that, and even though it's not your fault, she turns you into a polyp.

-Ephilatus and Otus tried invading Olympus. They eternally drown in the center of a waterfall, tied by snakes to a pillar, while Fate watches them as an owl. Ouch!

-Some of the evil people whom Theseus defeated:

Procrustes, who tied his victims to a bed and either stretched them on a rack or chopped off body parts if they did not fit.

Sinis who bent down two pine trees with his great strength, tied the hands of passer-bys to the tips of the two trees, and then let go.

Sciron, another bandit, was tame by comparison, but still pretty terrifying—living on a cliff overlooking the sea, he posed as a kindly old man and asked travelers to help him wash his feet. If they accepted, he'd wait for them to kneel...then he'd kick them off the cliff. Depending on the version, they'd either fall to their deaths or be devoured by a giant turtle that lurked in the waves below. Either way, Sciron very clearly did this for fun.

Phaea, who terrorized Crommyon, had a gigantic man-eating sow for a pet that accompanied her on her raids on the eponymous town. Sure, Theseus killed her, but the fact that this old lady had a big-ass pig for a pet should say something about her personality.

-The Minotaur's young victims were imprisoned in the labyrinth and force to run for their lives until the beast catches and devours them or they drop dead of exhaustion, hunger and thirst. It's like the first teen slasher flick.

-The future Olympians were able to live and grow in Cronus' stomach. How exactly? Squick indeed.

-Antaeus the giant, who was building a temple using human skulls.

-A non-mortal prisoner of Tartarus was Arke, Iris' lesser known sister. It was said that during the Titanomachy, Arke had betrayed the Olympians in favor of the Titans and became their messenger. When the Olympians won the war, Zeus not only cast her into Tartarus along with the Titans, he also tore her wings off for good measure.

-Princess Elera was impregnated by Zeus abd then hidden. She gave birth to a giant named Tityos... and died during chilbirth.

It is written that once he came of age he tried to force himself on Leto. Fortunately, Artemis and Apollo heard their mother's cries of distress and killed Tityos by raining arrows upon him. As his afterlife punishment he gets sent off to Tartarus to be forever eaten alive by eagles not unlike Prometheus but without anyone freeing him.

-King Diomedes, who fed humans to his flesh-eating horses. In a Karmic Death and/or Ironic Death twist, he himself was fed to them.

-Oedipus; Imagine marrying your own mother and unknowingly having intercourse with her! Horrible! Then, to top it all off, Oedipus gouged his own eyes out after he discovered all of this. Honestly guys put the blame on Freud for all the "Joe Mama" jokes.

-The rape of Callisto. She was raped (once she realized who her attacker really was and what he was going to do she fought), by Zeus disguised as his daughter Artemis. Callisto was a follower of Artemis and one of the goddess’s favorite companions.In other words, Callisto was raped by a god in the form of her best friend. Callisto is cast out, turned into a bear, separated from her son for 15 years, and upon seeing him after those 15 years, is almost killed by him. (In some versions they are only spared by one killing the other or killing each other by Zeus literally invoking Mama Bear in turning the son into a bear cub, upon which all fighting ceases).

-Athena's birth. The clanging produced when Metis forged Athena's armor gave Zeus a massive headache, and he was willing to do anything to stop the headache...ANYTHING, including go to one of his least favorite people in the world, Hephaestus, and have him split his skull wide open. Then, Athena burst out of Zeus' bleeding skull, fully grown and armored, and letting out a battle cry.

-Her mother, Metis, was fated to give birth to a son more powerful than Zeus. So he turns her into a fly and swallows her whole.

-The Graeae. Dear Gods, the Graeae! Spooky old witches who only had one eye and one tooth among them. They shared both items among themselves and even fought over both! Even worse, some versions say that they were half-human and half-swan.

-Medea. Where to start? First, she killed her brother and threw his diced up corpse into the sea bit by bit to make sure she and her boytoy Jason escaped her father, the king of Colchis. When Jason dumped her for a princess, she then decided to murder the princess with a cloak that instantly turns the wearer into a fireball. She also kills Jasons' future father-in-law, and finished this up by killing the kids that the couple had together. She makes her get-away by flying into the sky on a chariot driven by Dragons. Finally, Medea manages to make peace with her father afterwards by killing her uncle, who had deposed the father as king. She is Nightmare Fuel for anyone who goes through messy divorces with psychopaths.

-Lycaon. He (or his sons, depending on the version) knew full well that Zeus makes a habit of dropping by in disguise to see if kings and hosts behave as they should, so when the big guy did show up, they suspected he might actually be Zeus. So what do they do to put him to the test? Why, kill a child from the next village over and serve him up as food. So Zeus turns them into the first werewolves, in some versions even noting that nothing about their behavior changed.

-The myth of Hades and Persephone has many interpretations, but the original, ancient tale is pure horror at its finest from both the perspective of Demeter and Persephone. Persephone is out picking flowers with her friends and strays from the group when she spots a narcissus, which is really a trap laid out by Hades to ensnare her. When Persephone plucks the flower Hades bursts out of the earth in his chariot and pulls her in while she is vainly attempting to fight him off and screaming for help, but they plunge to the earth before anyone can come to the goddess's aid. Hades arrives in his kingdom with his justifiably terrified bride-to-be and drops the bomb that they're getting married on her while the poor girl is still trying to process the fact that she was just snatched from her home, her beloved mother and everything else she's ever known, and is about become her abductor's wife and queen of his kingdom.

-Hera was a notoriously jealous goddess. While Zeus's infidelities were hardly admirable, her responses to them were nothing short of horrifying. She would wreak cruel vengeance against the women he slept with, including those who didn't know their lover's true identity and even women her husband raped. Not only that, she's incredibly malicious to his children, even though it's obviously not their fault they were fathered by the King of the Gods.

-In the Dionysiaca, we have Typhon spelling out to Zeus all the lovely things he plans on doing to the Olympians when he takes over.These include, but are not limited to...

Chaining up Poseidon with the same chains that Iapetus is bound by.

Sending a bigger, stronger eagle (possibly Typhon's own offspring) to peck out Hephaestus' liver to avenge Prometheus.

Trapping Hermes in a jar forever.

Forcibly marrying off Artemis, Leto and Athena and letting their husbands rape them.

Forcing Hera to marry him (Typhon) specifically.

-Think about what poor Leto had to go through when Hera found out she was pregnant with Zeus' twins—Hera basically tells Leto she's banned from giving birth literally anywhere on Earth, starts spying on her as she desperately searches for someplace to give birth and in some versions sends a freaking dragon to chase Leto as she wanders. And just when Leto finally found a haven (sometimes provided by Poseidon at Zeus' behest) to give birth, a massive storm happens and the Goddess of Childbirth (sometimes Hera, sometimes her daughter) refuses to help her, leaving poor Leto to desperately cling to her patch of land and give birth, hoping that the storm doesn't wash her away. Fortunately, she succeeds.

-Hades has a helmet that makes him invisible and according to some even intangible (meaning he can go through walls while wearing it). While he IS one of the nicer ones, that does beg the question... How does someone know that he's down where his job is and not, uh, right behind you?

#alicia vance #greek gods #greek mythology #nightmare fuel

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