#tw // dysfunctional family

[crookedkryptonitebeliever]

It Was Only Supposed to be a One Night Stand (part 8)

Tw: Yandere, Montgomery came from a dysfunctional family, fat shaming, like bullying from parents

LOOK AT MY NEW SERIES THAT COMBINES YVES AND MONTGOMERY TOGETHER

Part 9

After four long days and three steamy nights, you finally reached the homestead that Montgomery was raving about.

It is massive. Lively too.

Even during winter, the animals were kicking up a fuss inside their respective barns. The main, open fields didn't seem to be growing anything, but you can see a couple of greenhouses side by side. The silos tower all the nearby buildings. Everything seems all over the place yet organized at the same time, perhaps you're not well versed in the art of farming, you wouldn't get it.

He drove further down to a large, two storey farmhouse. The wooden planks worn with age and memories, plants creeping from under the sheet of powdery white. Montgomery parked right next to five other trucks that clearly saw better days. You turned your head to see that there is another living quarter, this time with two cars, but four vacant parking spots.

Typical of him, he gets out of the car first to open your door.

You held onto his hand as your boots flatten the snow below you. He has a protective arm around your waist, making you sure that you won't fall.

"We made it home." He pulled his scarf down to give you a kiss on the forehead. "Praise lord, we made it safe and sound." Montgomery rubbed your back up and down.

Praise lord? That's new. You never pegged him to be religious, seeing how he is behind bedroom and motel doors.

He struck his knuckles against the sturdy door that's protected by a metal gate. You eyed the rust coating them, wondering how old their properties are.

With this much resources, they should have been filthy rich. Why is everyone cramped into these two houses?

The door swung open to reveal an older male, with greying hair and a baseball cap. He is a lot shorter than Montgomery himself.

"Monty, my boy!" He exclaimed and excitedly opened the gate. Both men flung themselves onto each other and had a hug fest.

"I missed ya, pa." The older gentleman lets out a hearty laugh.

"Missed ya too, Ugly."

Ugly? That's... an odd thing to call your son. You can see that Montgomery's smile faltered a bit.

"So? Gonna introduce me to this beauty here?" His father smiled at you.

"This is (name), my partner." Montgomery clasped his hands on your shoulders and pulled you closer to him. "Born n' raised in the city." He shot his father a look, as if hinting to not make you too uncomfortable with the countryside lifestyle.

"Huh. Now how did ya' get to meet my son? I know y'all city dwellers have sky-high expectations for lovers, especially in the looks department ." He guffawed and slapped Montgomery on the back. "I guess his heart of gold won ya' over."

Your boyfriend looks uncomfortable.

You changed the subject, asking if you could come in due to the freezing weather.

"Come on in! A friend of Monty is a friend of mine, I ain't have much from his side. So, I'm excited to get to know ya!" He steps aside to let the both of you in.

It definitely has a rustic aesthetic. Cushions and rugs worn and tattered. There are three German Shepherds sleeping on the couches. A fluffy grey cat sits atop one of them, eyes serenely closed.

The hearth is crackling loudly and its heat is warming the house up. You looked around to see numerous framed pictures of his family on all sides of the walls.

There are a dizzying number of different faces that you can identify. You wonder if he had a thousand siblings or these are including his cousins and niblings.

"Do I hear that Monty the Ugly is home?!" A high pitched voice rang from another room.

"Ya' sure did, Sugar! Our boy is home!"

A woman of similar age to his father, came rushing in. In her arms held a large wooden bowl filled with what looks like batter of some sort.

She set the bowl down on a table somewhere and hurled herself to Montgomery. She gave him a bone-crushing hug, it was so tight that your boyfriend had the air knocked out of his lungs. That's where he gets his habit from.

She whipped her head towards you, her eyes lit up even more and you could almost feel her gyrating on the spot.

"Oh! Who's this little sweet thing right here?" She let her son go before skittering towards you. His mother reminded you a lot of a hyperactive mouse.

"That's Monty's lover, can you believe it?!" His father replied with great enthusiasm.

She let out a squeal and squeezed your cheeks. "No! I can't. Praise Jesus, he finally found someone who loves him past his outside!"

"That's enough now, ma." He forcefully pried her away from you. She stumbled backward a little, her husband came to her aid but before he could defend her, she had something to say.

"What? I'm just showin' our guest how we welcome folks like them!" Whined his mother. Montgomery ignored them, preferring to inspect your face instead, he caressed your cheeks as he whispered, "I'm sorry about them."

"And I raised ya' better than to put your hands on your mother like that!" His father had a sudden change of tone, his face contorted into something a lot less friendly.

"I know that's right, Monty! The city corrupted your values, ya' should have stayed back and helped with the family business." His mother spat with malice.

"Really!? Right now? In front of my sweetheart?" Montgomery retorted with equal offense. He stood in front of you protectively.

They snapped their head towards you and took a moment of silence. Their animosity dropped as fast as it arrived, they returned to their smiles and giggles.

"Silly ol' us, where are our manners? You ain't even know what to call us!" The father hooked his arm around your neck and gave you a noogie. You wince at the sudden touch and pain.

"You can call me 'ma', and him 'pa'. Forget about the Mr and Mrs crap, we're all family here!" His mother clapped her hands excitedly.

"Hands off!" Montgomery's digits curled around his father's wrist, yanking it away from your head. He shoved him away from you and pressed you close into him. "Don't fucking touch them!" He shouted.

"What the hell has gotten into ya'? We're your parents, for god's sake! You don't get to talk to us like that!" Retaliated his father.

"Precisely, Monty! The city's no good for you. If only you listened to us and pastor--"

You interrupted their potentially disastrous argument, asking to meet the rest of the family. Like before, they immediately forget about their anger and go straight to being lovingly sweet again.

"Yes! I'll call those lazy bones down right now." The mother took a deep breath and began screeching their names, she moved towards the staircase and continued yelling. You had to plug your ears with your fingers, it was as loud as the train. Maybe even louder.

"While my wife's callin' them down, c'mon, I'll teach you their names." His father wanted to put a hand on your shoulder, but Montgomery growled at him. He rolled his eyes and let his hand drop to the side.

You stood in front of the second biggest framed picture in the living room. You let out a sigh of relief, at least you only need to remember the faces and names of 10 people, as opposed to 70 in the largest family picture.

All of them wore the same flannel shirt and type of jeans.

"That's Noel, our youngest. He's turnin' 25 this Christmas. Be careful with him, he's the softest among all of us. He just can't take a joke!" He pointed at the boy who had his hair bleached, his roots were showing. You took note of his rainbow shoelaces.

"That's Baby-Ruth. She's sweeter than chocolate, she's the only one showin' willingness to help out around the farm. Unlike a certain someone who decided to abandon us." He narrowed his eyes at Montgomery, and his father received a mean glare back. Baby-Ruth is the only glowing one in this picture who genuinely looks happy to be in it.

"Ah! Rufus the dog! He's a lean, mean machine, lemme tell ya that. He does all the heavy liftin', he could carry a full-grown cow across the field and not break a sweat! Just hopin' he would lay off the moonshine." Rufus looks horrendous in this picture, eyebags, tousled hair, and sunken cheeks.

"And that's your loverboy, Monty the Ugly!" He pointed at a younger-looking Montgomery.

You said that he looks handsome in this picture, you didn't understand why he's being assigned the title. But truth be told, he just looks average.

Upon hearing that, Montgomery felt his heart swell and he became bashful. But the moment was ruined when his father decided to laugh in your face.

"I guess big places like the city have some big variety of tastes. Not here, though."

You tried defending your boyfriend, feeling upset that he's unfairly treated in this family. Or maybe you felt offended when he implied that your standards are low. You said that he was well sought after in the city, people liked how strong and rugged he was. There is no way he's considered unattractive here.

What you said is not necessarily true in Montgomery's experiences, but it made him melt nonetheless.

You fully expected a shouting match with his father like earlier. But he only brushed it off and took it as a joke.

"Stop yankin' my chains, ain't no way the majority prefer... this-" He gestured towards your boyfriend. "-Over, this!" He pointed to the next family member.

You wouldn't admit it out loud. But whoever his father is pointing at is definitely a hunk. He has a million-dollar smile and striking hazel eyes. The man has his hair slicked back into a neat fashion, you can see his muscles peeking out of his flannel. He knows how to flaunt his good side.

"Our poster boy, Beau! All the ladies in town and out of town is chasin' after him. That's why, he's the face of our products. Shame that he married a woman that didn't quite match his level."

You asked him if he's calling his wife hideous.

He shrugged nonchalantly. "Somethin' like that. You're a much better fit for him, but I guess to each their own."

You shot Montgomery a look, your mouth agape. Is his family always like this? He looked away shamefully, starting to regret visiting home.

"Next! Betty the fatty! She could never seem to shed that weight." He chuckled. "I guess Mama's fried chicken's too good for her to resist! Breaking a chair or five never stopped her from getting seconds or thirds or fifteenths during Thanksgiving!"

You brought your hands to your head. You told him that they must be insane, Betty may be chubbier than the rest of them, but she looks normal. Perhaps even thinner than you are, given her height. Either way, She doesn't deserve to be talked about like that.

"Ah, don't you worry. I was just kiddin'. She only broke four chairs with her fatass. Plus, she can take a joke. Unlike a certain wannabe blondie." Before you could even argue about anything else, Montgomery squeezed your shoulder gently. You turned your head to see him shaking his head, pleading with you to drop it. So you did.

"We got the other end of the spectrum, Emerson the Skeleton!" Horrified, your eyes trailed to the end of his fingertips. He's pointing to an emaciated woman who has a scarf tied to her head, it looks like she's trying to cover up part of her hair. She didn't appear to be smiling and her eyes looked vacant.

"She's lazy. Barely helping out with the farm and always sleepin' in. Always spendin' her hard-earned check at the hospital, I wonder what's so interestin' over there."

You cannot tell if he was joking or if he truly did not understand she was suffering from some sort of illness.

"We worry for her, she's nearly 40 and unmarried. I reckon it's cause she ain't have no meat on her bones. Men like to go for something with a little more substance, ya' get what I'm saying?" He nudges you in the rib using his elbow.

Montgomery was about to jump in, but you raised a palm to him. Telling him that it's fine.

"And finally, our oldest. Mary-Grace. Can't believe she's turnin' 50. Time has gone by so fast." He has a wistful look on his face. The oldest looked... tortured. She seems so angry yet so trapped. Her deep wrinkles show you unseen expressions.

Interestingly enough, he has nothing much to say about her.

"Then, there's us! Me, Robert Yeller and my lovely wife, Anna-Mae Yeller. We've been married for 50 long years. She's just a couple months older than I am, but she acts just like my mother!" They both look the happiest. Everyone except Baby-Ruth looked like they were attending a funeral in comparison.

You asked how old are they now.

"We turned 66 this year." The gears started turning in your head. You rather not think about it in the end.

"-meet the new addition to our family!" Your ears perked up at the voice of Anna-Mae. You turned around to see Noel, Emerson and Mary-Grace Yeller. Your eyes rolled down to see a gaggle of children, excitedly chattering among each other.

The children squealed when they saw you and Montgomery. They were like high-speed bullets the way they came running. They latched onto you, their weight making you lose your balance and fall to the ground.

You groaned as they laughed and hugged you close.

"I know y'all are excited to meet your new pibling. But guys, git off them, you're going to scare my Sweetheart away!" He shooed them off you, they shrieked playfully as Montgomery exaggerated his stomps, chasing them around the room until they slipped off to somewhere else to play.

Montgomery seems to get along with the children well. You wondered if he wanted children later in life, that may be a problem given the economy is on a downward trend.

Your boyfriend helped you up, checking you for any injuries sustained.

You turned your face to look at his siblings. They're... nothing like their parents personality-wise. They stared at you cautiously, a conflicted look rested on their faces as soon as their eyes landed on Montgomery.

There was tension in the air, Mary-Grace furrowed her eyebrows, looking at Montgomery. Then he turned to you, and an unreadable expression emerged.

"Welcome. Make yerself' at home." She was curt. She turned around and walked away.

"Hello." Emerson rasps. She gave you a small wave and a polite smile. She too, left the room promptly.

Noel looked you up and down, seemingly judging you.

"How was life like in the city?" He ignored you, asking Montgomery.

"Show my partner some respect, if you know what's good for you." Seethed Montgomery through his gritted teeth.

"Sup." He gave you an upward nod. You mirrored his behavior.

"Were you happy?" Asked Noel, treating you like you're invisible. "Were they any less 'sensitive' than me?"

"Noel." He snarled. "Not now."

To your surprise, Noel didn't inherit any of their Southern accents. He almost sounds... Californian.

Noel snorted. "Welcome to the Yeller household. I can tell you're going to love it here." The sarcasm dripping from his tone definitely didn't go undetected. He went back upstairs, you heard a loud slam shortly after.

"Heh, guess someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed, amirite?" The couple laughed in unison.

Montgomery rubbed your arm up and down. "Let's go." He whispered.

He excused himself needing to set the luggage down in the bedroom. You followed him to the car, not wanting to be in the same room as the unstable elderly couple.

What have you gotten yourself into?

[jellsrants]

George Stacy VS Jefferson Davis - a glaring parallel

Something I have been thinking about quite a lot (to the point where I made a video edit about it) is the difference in how Mr Stacy and Mr Davis reacted to a very similar situation. And, with a seeming uprise in posts defending George Stacy on Twitter, now is as good time as any to talk about it.

Let's start with the story of George Stacy. He had a preconceived notion about the actions of Spider-Woman. When he saw Spider-Woman kneeling over the body of a kid who was, by all means, a very close family friend, he assumed the worst. Then, he found out that Spider-Woman was a kid. Not just any kid - his own child, Gwen. However, despite her pleading with him to hear her out, not only did he keep his gun in his hands, but he actually fired it at her. If it wasn't for mere luck of them not being alone there, she would have been killed that night.

Now, let us turn our attention towards the first movie, where Jefferson Davis went through a fairly similar situation. He as well was shown to have preconceived notions about Spider-Man, with almost identical complaints that Mr Stacy made. He saw Spider-Man kneeling over the body of not just a close family friend, but his own brother. He assumed the worst as well. However, that is where the two stories take drastically different directions. When Mr Davis realises, that Spider-Man in question is a kid, and sees him fighting an adult villain, he understands the situation. Moreover, despite the danger to his own life and safety, he encourages Spider-Man to not give up, which is just the push that Miles needed to save the day, instead of succumbing and being defeated. Even without knowing that the child he encouraged was his child, Mr Davis did his best to be understanding and open-minded, which didn't just save the life of his own child, but saved their entire dimension from crumbling because of Kingpin's actions.

Quite a few George Stacy defenders argue that he is a cop, and acted accordingly to his job. But Mr Davis is a cop too, and he somehow managed to not get trigger happy with a child.

The real and true main difference between those two stories, in the end, was the ability of the father to, well, be a father. And just this simple parallel makes me believe, that if Gwen agreed to let Miles explain her situation to his parents, they would have been incredibly accepting and understanding, if a bit skeptical. But the way Gwen's and Miles' actions, fears and personalities are incredibly defined by their family dynamics is a theme for a future, much longer rant. Or even a series of rants.

[creaturecomplications]

TW: mentions of death(we all know who), analysis and acknowledgement of familial dysfunction in the TMNT 2012 narrative

-

TL;DR immediately under cut

TL;DR: The 2012 turtles grew up in a dysfunctional family system created by Splinter and the poor writing accidentally gave a really good inside look to what real dysfunctional families are like. Also I still like this version, so I analysed it.

-

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Thought I'd share a thought I've had about the 2012 TMNT series for a WHILE. This is based on a mix of my own, admittedly somewhat limited, engagement with the series as well as what I've heard others say about it's writing quality and the particular issues it creates in the series.

TMNT 2012 unintentionally became a REALLY good look at what a dysfunctional family is like from the INSIDE. I say this as someone who grew up in a dysfunctional family system, though my parents were not physically abusive like Splinter was shown to occasionally be mostly to Leo but sometimes he dragged the whole family along for the ride. Regardless, let me give a couple examples.

People often complain how Mikey's character growth is just plain ignored by the writers repeatedly throughout the series(really anyone who isn't Leo or Raph, but Mikey's the focus for now). While this IS bad writing on their part, it's also something that ACTUALLY HAPPENS in dysfunctional systems like this. Mikey's role in the family is clearly the jokey, happy little brother. In families like this, you are not allowed to grow outside your role. No one will outright SAY it, but the family's reactions to such things will usually be enough for most people to shove themselves right back in their box. That said, some find spaces and people outside the family to explore these parts of themselves, and from what little I've seen Mikey seems to have done this with the likes of the Mutanimals, then, once he's back with family, everything deemed outside his role gets neatly tucked away until next time.

There's also their friends who, even those who've been accepted as family, don't get to see the full extent of the dysfunction. Everyone knows Raph and Leo fight, they'll yell at each other in the main room after all, but no one gets to see things like what I've watched of Splinter's and Leo's talks in the dojo, and most of Splinter's talks with Raph about his anger. Actually, a lot of Splinter's not-so-great actions are hidden, not just from their friends, but from a good chunk of his sons too. Then, once someone like April shows up, he's the loving, if some what strict, father that pretty much everyone in this community the turtles have built respects greatly. This respect isn't entirely without merit, I'll admit, but the point still stands that he acts better when people from outside their immediate family are around then he does when their not. I also wouldn't say he's the greatest towards any of his kids, but he's better to some then others with Raph and Leo getting the brunt of it, though even Raph seems to experience more warmth from him in the show then Leo does. He also seems to treat Raph and Leo better if Donnie and/or Mikey are around, though not as much as when friends stop by.

I know I've just spent an entire paragraph essentially sh*tting on Splinter, but I would like to point out that IS clear he loves his sons dearly. It's also clear he's a deeply flawed and traumatized character who I plan on exploring more. Regardless, it doesn't excuse his behavior and the toxic system he's created as a result of it. I think even more of an explanation could have been found if we knew more about his upbringing and the Hamato Clan outside of Tang Shen and Oroku Saki, but he actually doesn't seem to talk much about them which is FASCINATING to me considering how much pride he holds in his culture and in BEING Hamato. Quite frankly, I'd bet money he's recreated something very similar to what he grew up in, hence why he sees no problem raising the turtles the same but now I'm just speculating and making head cannons 😅. Either way, as much as he loves them, he was NOT the best dad.

Back to the main point, while the writing, again CLEARLY unintentionally, creates a really good narrative look at the inner workings of a dysfunctional family, there IS hope for them at the end from what I've seen. An interesting detail I've noticed is that the boys all seem to start getting along better and finding better ways to cope and work together whenever Splinter is out of the immediate picture for a significant chunk of time, like when their in space or at the farmhouse. It takes time, sure, but it's there. They also seem to do better and get closer as they get older, which is something my sister and I found in our own relationship. While Splinter's death is certainly hard on them, I imagine they'll stay close and things will only get better between them as time goes on. Maybe they'll realize how Splinter handled certain things wasn't great or maybe they won't, but either way I see room for them to be happier and more real, present, and honest with each other post series. Please feel free to respectfully give your opinion and your own observations, I'd love to see some other takes if possible! Also please keep in mind that I haven't watched the full series, mostly just clips with some episodes sprinkled in through the years so please feel free to tell and send me stuff so I can watch and learn more about these guys because I love them even if they're not my favorite iteration!

[there-will-be-a-way]

Sometimes I think that my family is not that fucked up, then I remember that as a child, as a form of punishement, my grandma was tied to a chair and locked up in a room full of mice which she was phobic of and that it's a funny dinner table story that my great-grandfather used to mure his pets into the walls of his house and that my mother doesn't want to know what else he bricked in

[nychthemeron-rants]

Single Mom AU pt. 4 ( 1 2 3 )

Chilchuck's Timeline

Age 5: Met her future wife, Faydan, at school. This was well before Faydan realized she was a trans woman, and at the time both Chil and Fay were ostracized from their peers for being too gnc, as Chil was a tomboy and Fay was a very fem “boy”. The two quickly became very close friends.

Age 8: Faydan comes out and begins her transition. Chil helps her pick out the name Faydan (she briefly considered Meijack and Flertom, but ultimately decided against it even though Chil loved those names.) 

Age 10: Chil realizes she's gay… in large part because of her developing a crush on Fay as she transitions.

Age 12: Chil begins an apprenticeship with a locksmith. Fay begins fantasy HRT

Age 12 cont.: Chil and Fay begin dating on Fay's 13th birthday

Age 13: A critical misunderstanding of how Fantasy HRT works leads to Chil getting pregnant with the twins. After a long and difficult time weighing their options, Chil and Fay decide to make it work and get married. Chil attempts to hide her pregnancy for as long as possible as she was scared of losing her apprenticeship. When she cant hide it she begs to be allowed to continue, but is kicked out.

Age 13 cont.: Mei and Fler are born, and while she is ecstatic about the births of her daughters, she begins to spend every moment not dedicated to her daughters dedicated to studying and teaching herself about locks and traps. This leads to the first spat of her marriage as Fay feels Chil is focusing too much on her career instead of their new family. Chil argues they have two new mouths to feed and Fay's job as a seamstress isn't bringing in enough.

Age 14: Gets a new apprenticeship in Kahka Brud, this one paid. So the family moves from their hometown. 

Age 15: Discovers this apprenticeship supports maternity leave so Chil and Fay decide to have one more child. However, after Puckpatti Chil gets her tubes tied. 

Age 16: First trip into the dungeon, discovers she was going to be used as bait and fed to monsters and flees. Returns home horrified. This leads to the first major fight in their marriage as Fay wants Chil to find a safer job for the sake of their kids, but Chil wants to make this job better for other half-foots. 

Age 16 cont.: Agrees to take a break from going into dungeons, and instead focuses on trying to make dungeon diving more safe and fair for half-foots while continuing to study locks and traps.

Age 18: Gets antsy and begins to dungeon dive again, much to Fay’s disdain. 

Age 20: Fay and Chil have another big fight about Chil's work, specifically how she's gone for weeks or months at a time and comes back thinner, injured, and then refuses to talk about it in any meaningful way. Also while she focuses on ensuring she's a good mother while home, she doesn't really spend any time focusing on being a good partner to Fay. Chil feels bad and agrees to try to be better.

Age 24: Chil begins working on the island and meets Dandan who helps her form the half-foot guild, meaning she's spending even more time away from home. As a last ditch effort to save their marriage Faydan insists the family moves to the island too. Chil reluctantly agrees as she enjoys the physical distance separating her work and home. But ultimately she does enjoy getting to see her wife and kids more often.

Age 25: The fateful dinner with Chil's party at the time happens. This breaks Fay and she leaves. As their kids are 12 at the oldest, she takes the kids with her, much to Chil's dismay. However, she does leave Chil a note saying that while she's leaving her, she can visit their kids at their old home in Kahka Brud if she wants. 

Age 25 cont.: She is DEVASTATED by her wife leaving her, and doesn't understand why she left her, even though it was because she wasn't feeling valued as Chil's wife and was sick and tired of constantly worrying about her.

Age 26: Meets Laia and joins the Touden party. 

Age 26 cont.: Finds Laia weeping over a letter from Lind and goes to comfort her. When she learns that Laia’s crying because she misses her daughter and feels guilty for not being able to be with her due to work, Chil mentions she understands because she's in a similar situation with her daughters. Mentions little else and tells Laia not to tell anyone else that Chil even has kids.

Age 28: Gets a surprise visit from all three daughters who are clearly distressed. While she has been visiting them and writing to them, this is the first time they've all come together to visit him. They tell her that after Puckpatti got her first job selling dragon dung, Fay disappeared and none of them have heard from her in over a week. Being blindsided by the emotional distress of her ex-wife (who she's still low-key in love with) disappearing and her daughters being panicked, she handles it the same way she always does, which is by not handling it and instead focusing on work. So she promises her daughters that she will completely financially support them while they look for their mom so they can put all their energy into that. She also makes an effort to contact her kids as much as possible.

Age 28/29: Plot Starts. She agrees to go help Laia save Fanil because she needs the money they paid her in advance for her daughters (and not at all because she cares about Laia, Marcel, and Fanil…) though she writes them in advance explaining what she's doing with some extra money and the key to her house quickly before they return.* 

Pt. 1 Overview

Pt. 2 Name Guide

Pt.3 Laia's Timeline

[vibeechecker]

tw// child abuse, somewhat vent like

Shio makes me so depressed to think about. This poor child lived her life in an emotionally, physically, and financially fucked environment. She was sweet, and acted in the care of others. She acted with the care of helping others and fixing their problems. With her mothers, and then satous. And then Satou made that worse. And something about that just hits so hard. Being a child in an unsafe environment with abused people that end up abusing you. And all you can think of is how they’ve been abused and helping them and so forth. Always their abuse and never your own. Pushing aside the pain they’re causing you, and trying so hard to fix their life and make them happy. And breaking yourself so much when you can’t. Bc you’re just a child. Too naieve and dumb to fully see the situation at large. And too young and too kind and too deep in this toxic environment to realize, a older individual’s problems and trauma are not you’re responsibility. Because you’re just a child. And no child should be given such a responsibility a child can’t even fathom to understand. And I’m not calling Shio or children dumb or that they can’t understand anything. (And no ones has this ‘responsibility,’ regardless of age) But im just trying to explain the pain I feel with Shio as someone who has been in a similar situation. And the pain of looking back at my younger self, and the situation i was in. Because its painful. And its just hard to explain the realization that you’re just a child, and are not responsible for fixing their life, when you should be happily and freely learning about your own instead. And idk. It’s just hard to put into words.

[runelocked]

william has always shown his emotions very physically. this goes double for his positive emotions !! always humming whenever he's in a good mood, sweeping his wife off her feet in a dance to show his love, spinning his kids round when they were young just because it made them giggle and he couldn't help but laugh in return. he annoyed henry into adding custom dumb little songs to the diner just so he could perform them.

this doesn't change when he begins to lose himself either ! because of course i have to make this fucked up and sad like i do with everything i write ever. -- sometime after losing liz he found an old cassette tape he used to play when laughing with his children and when he rediscovers it, the house is almost never quiet. constantly playing, the only pause it takes is for him to reset and begin again - humming along whenever it's not playing. michael grew up in a house alive with music and emotion and then a house rotting with the corpses of both, and sometimes william will still dance, or play music, or seem just as animated as he had back then: but there's always an air of something wrong, something too tightly strung. movements not right, voice different. an overwound clock. there's just something so incredibly twisted and sad about william and dance and music to me ok

[queeresthellhound]

My mother always loved Jesus more than she loved me

And my mother hears me say I was drafted into a holy war I never wanted to be in

Expected to ostracize myself with joy because if the other children hated me it’s because they were Satanic

And sees nothing wrong with it except that I defected.

And she reads the essay I wrote in the third grade before I even knew where babies came from

Saying that if I were president abortion would be illegal everywhere

Because I had been groomed to be a Christian Nationalist ready to ruin lives for the lord

And thinks not that it is horrific a child of not even 12 would write that but rather how horrific it is I do not believe it anymore.

My mother always loved Jesus more than she loved me

And if she was called to do as Abraham, and if I was called to become her Isaac she would have done it

And on the long walk home she would have told me that it was god’s will and that he had a plan that’s bigger than all of us

And at one time I would have believed everything she said on the long journey home, nodding my head silently

Because if she loved Jesus more than me, he must know something that I don’t.

And when my very life was saved by EMTs and doctors and nurses and so many others

Who worked their asses off to make sure my mother’s only begotten son would not be lost

My mother thought of a different only begotten son, the son of John 3:16

And when I survived she praised him for saving her wayward, rebellious child who had hardened his heart to her precious Jesus

Instead of the sinful humans who did all of the work.

And when I had finally gotten up the courage to sit on her bed, bawling my eyes out, a river spring up from the spot I occupied

Telling her that her darling Jesus made a mistake, that I was a mistake,

She decided that god had not made a mistake but that my sinful existence was a part of his holy plan

And then days later shoved me back in the closet with the force of a summer thunderstorm

Because the mouthpieces of Jesus decided that I could not decide for myself what a life of joy looked like

And after all she always loved Jesus more than me.

And my mother still thinks that I will come back to the flock

Despite the fact that I have a crisis every time I step in a church

Despite the fact I see myself as chewed gum, licked cupcakes, dirty duct tape for being alive

Despite the fact that at lectures which remind me of sermons I feel trapped behind a window in my brain

Despite the fact that her church would vote me out of existence tomorrow if given the choice

Despite the fact that her church friend’s “love” for me is predicated on me coming back to their cult

Because my mother has always loved her abusive, manipulative, absentee, deadbeat son Jesus more than the son standing right in front of her

Because Jesus can be anyone and anything she needs him to be

And I can only ever be a goat standing in a flock of sheep, hoping no one ever looks close enough to notice the differences.

[lil-miss-bearhug]

Lol..My family is dysfunctional asf

Kinda gotten used to the yelling and arguing tho.

[thexie-and-stars]

my mum is fucking laughing at me

i'm about to shutdown and she's laughing

how can she do this

[slaughterlocked]

@bravevolunteer / from here.

MICHAEL EARNS LESS OF HIS FATHER’S SYMPATHY WHEN HE CRIES.  When he’d been a boy,  William might have held him close  ( if he’d been around to even see him cry ),  dust off his cheeks,  firmly promise him he would be alright.  As it stands,  William stares at his son now,  the monster,  the wolf,  and feels nothing but a very distant sense of pity.  Michael looks pathetic,  sniveling and bloodied,  figurative tail tucked between his legs.

“ Christ. ”  Is all he mutters at first,  and,  luckily,�� there’s a bucket on hand.  Without another word,  he pushes it towards his eldest,  eyeing him with the air of a disappointed teacher.  They’re similar  –  bloody and violence and monstrous  –  and somehow Michael finds new ways to make William stifle the urge to roll his eyes or yell.  You’re alive and you’re special and you’re helping me more than you ever did before.  Isn’t that something ?  Shouldn’t Michael be on his hands and knees, fucking groveling in gratitude to him ?

A wave of irritation washes over him,  but William permits his son the dramatics.  He moves back,  crouches to his level.  As a child, he’d loved a street dog,  a scruffy thing that whined more than it fought and bit more than it befriended.  Dealing with wild animals is more natural to him than fathering.  In a way,  he loves Michael more when he’s transformed:  at least the wolf is easier to deal with than the wreck his son is now.

“ You’re alright. ”  It’s a pointless platitude.  Surely Michael knows that.  William’s hands raise,  almost pacifying,  keeping his voice low and level.  If Michael can’t find calm,  then William will demonstrate it,  guide him to steadiness.  A lifeboat for a drowning man,  if the lifeboat had also been the one to hold him under the waves in the first place.  “ It’s only a natural progression of things,  Mike.  You must have known – ”

For once,  he cuts himself off,  saving his science and his explanations for later.  Instead,  he sighs,  and very,  very slowly  ( he’s not afraid,  he tells himself,  not of Michael )  inches closer to his son.  “ Shh,  there you go, ”  he murmurs,  “ just breathe. ”  The vials of remnant clink gently together in the bag slung over his body,  as he brushes it aside to crouch awkwardly low next to him.  Ignoring the vials for now  –  though excitement stirs deep in his gut at the reminder of the progression in his work –  William does his best to exude something akin to comfort. He supposes it’s the least he can do.  " You're not hurt, are you? "

[thebisexualwreckoning]

Logically I know my parents are never getting divorced because they’re too Indian for that but it’d be soooo funny if this, the day of their 25th marriage anniversary is when my mom finally asks for a divorce. Because the way this is going shit only ends in two ways: divorce or murder

[theautumnriverleaves]

i know we are halfway thru the year but i think my 2024 goal is going to be to internalize the idea that if the rest of my family were actually as good at handling the stress of my father/family as they claim (with the idea being im the weakling that can't handle stress) that we would probably have fewer alcoholics and fewer "anything below 80f is the artic zone and i only sleep 3 hours a night and youre weird if you think that's weird" people.

[d0llyxtears]

I feel like I was born cursed… doomed from the start.

I look at myself in the mirror, i look at at the places where his hands touched and I remember their words about my body… about how blessed I was to have it .

I was not blessed to have comments thrown my way about my body at 11 years old …about how well I’ve developed in “that” area or that I have a perfect “ bubble butt” … about how I have to be careful or the boys will be all over me .

I was not blessed to be sexualized on the internet at 15 by men older than me that had bad intentions and manipulated my naive mind to get what they wanted

I was not blessed when my gross disgusting brother took it upon himself to SA me because he was “ helping me with self esteem “ because he knew my problems at school and knew I was to shy and anxious to really fight back or say “no “ because he’s been doing this since I was six anyways

I was not blessed when I realized at 20 that I don’t really fit in this “girl” box I’ve been born in and to have both my parents say well you’re body and biology defines your gender so we’re always going to see you as something you’re not … worsening my dysphoria

I am not blessed… my body is not a blessing to me …. I look at myself in the mirror and remember everything that has been said about me and has been done to me and …….. I think …

I think I might just be cursed ….

[runelocked]

if you’ve ever wondered about william’s relationship with his father, all that needs to be said are two things: that his father’s only disappointment is that he was stupid enough to get himself killed; and that this singular disappointment far outweighs any respect he’d ever have for his son’s other actions. so yeah he gets his parenting style from his dad 💀

[lavend3r-stardust]

I just need to be held rn. fuck everything, its so loud and everything's pissing me off (read: family dysfunction) and I just want them to hold me. Want their hands around my back and holding my waist as I lay against their chest and they give me room to cry. I really need that right now.