#tw heterosexuality

[iguessweallcrazyithinktho]

YESSSSSS

[dingledraw]

“One heck of a gal”

Silly fanart of @chernozemm ‘s beautiful fanart, because their designs are so pretty 🤩

[sharpth1ng]

Sidney and Billy are a REAL SHIP!!!!!Write fics about them please. You’re a great writer, do something for the heteros. It’s starting to seem like you hate Heterosexual People. DO YOU HATE THE HETEROSEXUAL COMMUNITY??? SidneyBilly are the ship we all deserved. Can you write smut with them please? 🍭🍭🍭🍭

Oh actually I already wrote smut for them! Check out chapter 13 of debaser 🫶👌👍

And of course I’m not heterophobic, I have a straight friend. They even said I’m allowed to say the c word (cisgender)

[augustpoem]

really into this guy but he doesn't teleport to me everyday to give me a forehead kiss so idk what he means with that:/

[yasminhananis]

[sar3nka]

Thinking of licking my period blood off his lips.... wait who said that...

[dieletztepanzerhexe]

Stop h*ving hetero s*x. You're younger than me wtf. Also its very cringe that you make a thousand posts aout how you won't accept less than you deserve and then you admit to performing dwgrading s*x acts you don't enjoy. Do you want me to laugh qt you or what?

[boudiccamoment]

i need u to know that one time i had a post on my dash that was nothing but a compilation of that star trek mfs mouth and it was "liked by terf-hands" and every time i get him on my dash i know its cuz of u. and i could turn that feature off but i wont. ur thirst for him is truly off the roof, an impressive feat

TUMBLR HAS BETRAYED ME

[cparen]

You know how they have those tv rating subcategories, like "alcohol references" or "cartoon violence"? I really wish they'd warn for typical straights bullshxt.

[fillejondrette]

the guy who plays dodi on the crown is like objectively average looking and also looks like he's on the verge of going bald which is a major drawback for me but somehow i'm still really attracted to him. um good casting i guess bc i totally get how diana would have been into him.

[thearsonistofarland]

Hello all two Loop8 fans

[arian-archivist-11]

I CANT DO THIS ANYMORE🙃

Male gamers take every opportunity they can to unnecessarily sexualize every female character they see. It's obvious they don't even think women are people, and they are even less considerate of the stories of female characters. In their minds woman are just there to be sexualized nothing more. Also wtf is with their obsession with these atteus sex jokes when it comes to the female characters he interacts with cus' when people have problematic ships its obviously a healthy expression of of Fandom interests with full understanding of right vs wrong. But with these guys it un-ironically gives off predator vibes. The amount of "I would hit that, don't care about her age" comments I hear from guys in gow Fandom spaces is really freaking creepy.

[sar3nka]

All my life I thought I was cursed to never finish during sex and was fine with it but now I unlocked my pussy chakra and can be done in 30 seconds. Writing a self help book asap this is amazing

[dieletztepanzerhexe]

I need to rub my face against someones unshaven cheek or i will go insane

[boudiccamoment]

osa is hell as a woman bc I'm pining after this dude while completely aware what a pathetically unremarkable thing he is. no lips. NO LIPS. why am I like this.

[shut-up-danny-kun]

“Tell me about your ideal career.”

You underestimate the absurdity of my ideals. Sit down.

I want to live off of a baroness' patronage. I lead a humble and lonely existence in an old house in a forgotten village. I take obscenely long walks around the fields and forests. The townsfolk regard me a harmless curiousity, but still, I am often at the centre of ill rumours: satanism, vampirism, lycanthropy...the children are certain I am some sort of hellbound being, and each imagine I am something different.

I have not found much sucess in the public eye, but my patron always appreciates my writing. Once a month, I am invited to her manor to present my work. My subject matter is often considered too unsavoury for respectable women, so the readings tend to occur in private - only me, her, and her maid. We sit in the overgrown gazebo in the spring and summer, and in the winter - in her dressing-room. My stories are dark and my poetry is gloomy. I write of murder, monsters, strange worlds and things that seem to go against the will of God. Sometimes, humanity triumphs over them; sometimes it doesn't. My patron is fascinated by my imagination. The room becomes drafty; the manor is crumbling and no one dares to admit it. We sit all evening and well into the night. I make my way home by feel.

Do I wish I could earn a living without my mistress? Sometimes. I think about it when it's freezing cold and I don't want to go ask for more money to buy firewood. But I would lose this strange intimacy I have with her. She says she sees herself in my works, that the only time she finally feels like herself is when she's reading them. It feels like my world is hers. The monthly meetings are not enough, of course: I send letters almost weekly. They're sealed with a special seal, letting the butler know to bring them directly to the lady of the house and not show them to anyone else.

She's trapped. I know she is. Her marriage, her status keep her whithin a set of rigid rules she can never escape, and even if she could, she would not know how to live outside them. My twisted world is her only glimpse of freedom. That is the artist's sacred duty: to give a different life to those wishing to escape theirs.

But I, too, would not be free without her. It is her donations and commendations that keep me afloat; without them, a ruined man like me would need to work so much I would have no time to think, much less write. That is the patron's sacred duty: to let the artist live in a world that seems hostile to art.

Sometimes she shuffles closer to me and looks at me with dark eyes, and holds my cold fingers in her soft hand, knowing that that is all she can do. We can't risk to ruin this arrangement with something this...pedestrian. But in those times, I still wonder whether it's simple romantic desire that draws me to her, or whether it's the ancient love of the artist and the patron, the purest love of them all.

I wrap my quilt tighter around my body, light a candle and begin writing.

...or, you know. Plumbing is probably fine too.