What are some of the weirdest stories/books/movies etc you've encountered in your Arthuriana journey? Whatever weird might mean to you (good/bad/unsettling/unexpected/surreal/goofy)
Hi anon!
This is honestly a tough thing to answer because what even constitutes a weird Arthurian retelling? They're all pretty weird haha! But I definitely have a few that come to mind
The French film Perceval (1978) is super weird in a great way! It's shot on a stage with painted backgrounds and metallic trees and structures for the set. Real horses are brought on. A troupe of bards provide diegetic music, playing instruments and singing a narration of events on screen while also acting as characters in their own right (such as the jester Kay throws into the fire). Perceval and Gauvain narrate their own stories in third person at times too. It's surreal! It's as if Perceval's world is "fake," since his mother has kept him isolated for so long, it's a distorted view of reality. This is the closest adaptation of Chrétien de Troyes's Story of the Grail I can think of, it's nearly word-for-word, BUT! They removed the racism and antisemitism. Two thumbs up! The ending is bananas. There's no describing it, you just have to watch. You can download this movie from my MEGA drive or it can be watched for free on Tubi! (Content warning for nudity and some gore.)
The film Unidentified Flying Oddball (1979) is my favorite adaptation of Mark Twain's A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court. The main character Tom works for NASA developing an android named Hermes. Through a comedy of errors, both Tom and Hermes end up launched into space at the speed of light, traveling through time, and crash land in Camelot, 508AD. Mordred mistakes Tom for a monster (due to his space suit and orb-shaped helmet) but Tom quickly wins Arthur's trust and allowed to hang out. He meets Sandy, a girl who thinks her dad has been transformed into a goose, and together with her and a page named Clarance, works to return home. It's exceedingly silly. I much prefer the character Tom (and Hermes, who is identical in appearance to Tom and jousts for him) to Sir Boss in the Connecticut Yankee film from 1949 with Bing Crosby. Tom's gun is funnier than the original as it's more like a science-fiction laser that blows things up. He also has a magnet ray he uses to draw armored knights where he wants. Not a good film, but goofy and fun. You can download this movie from my MEGA drive! (No content warnings, it's a family movie!)
The film Excalibur (1981) obviously has to make this list. Coincidentally, it's mostly for Percival again. The Grail Quest segment accounts for just 20 minutes of the entire film, but it feels like eons. And it's So Weird. It's safe to call it horror. Percival meets struggle after struggle, encountering many dead comrades along the way, raving mad townspeople struggling to survive, Morgan and Mordred attempting to steer him wrong. He's eventually hung from a tree and has a vision of God's voice. (Hallucination or real?) The dead knight dangling above him sways and his spurs cut Percival free. From there he runs into Uriens and holds him as he dies, struck down by miscreant knights. Percival eventually achieves the grail, obviously, but it's not until he's pushed the absolute limits. It's probably one of my favorite sequences in film ever. 11/10. You can download this from my MEGA drive! (Content warning for nudity, rape, gore, and incest.)
As for books, I recommend The Modern Arthur Trilogy by Peter David. The first one is Arthur running for mayor of NYC, the second one is President of the United States, and the third one he sort of becomes a god. It's wild. Other characters include Guinevere, Lancelot, Morgan le Fay, Mordred, Percival, Merlin, and of course the Lake of the Lake. The sequels randomly add Gilgamesh and Enkidu (and later Noah, like the guy with an ark in the Bible??) and it's all very strange indeed. The first book is definitely the best but Gilgamesh/Enkidu were pretty freaky (affectionate) so I did enjoy that, although the whole premise of book two is...meh. I listened to the graphic audio books which were awesome, the sound effect of Arthur falling down the subway stairs in full armor is worth every penny. (Content warning for incest, murder, cannibalism, racism, and terrorism)
(according to wheels, who definitely spent a normal amount of time on this)
EDDIE MUNSON
The Sword in the Stone. He's probably a Peter Pan enthusiast too, but the one where the gangly orphan is found by a bad-ass wizard who takes him on adventures and teaches him magic, and he eventually becomes king? That's the stuff fantasies are made of. Eddie Munson's fantasies, to be exact. Bet he totally had an owl obsession at some point because of Archimedes.
Deep Cut: Not that I think Eddie has a thing for knights or anything, but Unidentified Flying Oddball. Obscure movie about a nerd in a spaceship accidentally landing in Camelot? Time travel, fair maidens, and weird humor? Eddie would eat it up.
Billy, Ralph, Tom, Leonard and Enjolras below the cut!
BILLY KNIGHT
Dumbo. He calls it his comfort movie, but the poor boy cries during "Baby Mine" every single time. And when Mrs. Jumbo gets locked up. (She was just trying to protect her baby!) And the ending, but those are different kinds of tears. Will also cry if anyone considers killing a mouse instead of doing a catch-and-release. Think of Timothy!
Deep Cut: Follow Me, Boys! It's a feel-good found-family movie about a musician who falls in love with a small town that learns to love him back. Minimal trauma, son of a drunk gets a loving family and an ideal father figure, happy endings for everyone!
RALPH PENBURY
Mary Poppins. It's fun, it's magical, Ralph wishes he had a nanny that cool. He loves the mixture of live-action and animation, and never stops wondering how they did it. "Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious" is one of his favorite words, and he WILL try to work it into everyday conversation. And you know what? He can kind of pull it off.
Deep Cut: Babes in Toyland. It's dramatic, it's romantic, it has epic musical numbers, and it ends with a fabulous wedding. It's everything Ralph wants in a picture!
TOM GRANT
The Lion King. It's a classic story told with awesome animals and unforgettable songs. Tom's love of this movie has nothing to do with the fact that Simba reunites with his childhood sweetheart and gets to keep her and rule the kingdom and whatnot. No projection here. Just a good guy enjoying a good movie. Shut up.
Deep Cut: Swiss Family Robinson. A family on a deserted island fends for themselves against tigers and pirates and the elements, oh my! And that treehouse? He's definitely spent a bit of time fantasizing about building one of those for himself.
LEONARD BAST
The Great Mouse Detective. I know this feels like a Literary Nerd Cop-Out, but this movie is so clever and full of adventure. Offers a new perspective on a great many subjects - not just the giant toys that aren't freaky at all. Len has no comment on the mouse hookers.
Deep Cut: Darby O'Gill and the Little People. Those effects? In the 1950s? CINEMA!
ENJOLRAS
Robin Hood. Vigilante steals from The Man to give to The People? C'mon.
Deep Cut: The Scarecrow of Romney Marsh. A vicar in a scarecrow mask leads a gang of smugglers on nighttime missions to evade taxes and the king's goons, thwarting tyranny with street smarts and help from the community at every turn.
...images from the lost continent of cult films, b-movies and celluloid dreamscapes
Pat Roach fantasy/sf films
A Clockwork Orange (1971) Unidentified Flying Oddball/The Spaceman and King Arthur (1979) The Monster Club (1981) Raiders of the Lost Ark (1981) Clash of the Titans (1981) Conan the Destroyer (1984) Red Sonja (1985) Willow (1988) Kull the Conqueror (1997)
(also Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom (1984), indiana Jones and the Last Crusade (1989)).
From the day I entered kindergarten until I graduated from high school Disney released 50 movies (animated OR live action)
How many have you heard of?
Robin Hood
Superdad
Herbie Rides Again
The Bears and I
The Castaway Cowboy
The Island at the Top of the World
The Strongest Man in the World
Escape to Witch Mountain
The Apple Dumpling Gang
One of Our Dinosaurs Is Missing
The Best of Walt Disney's True-Life Adventures
Ride a Wild Pony
No Deposit, No Return
Treasure of Matecumbe
Gus
The Shaggy D.A.
Freaky Friday
The Littlest Horse Thieves
The Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh
The Rescuers
Herbie Goes to Monte Carlo
Pete's Dragon
Candleshoe
Return from Witch Mountain
The Cat from Outer Space
Hot Lead and Cold Feet
The North Avenue Irregulars
The Apple Dumpling Gang Rides Again
Unidentified Flying Oddball
The Black Hole
Midnight Madness
The Watcher in the Woods
Herbie Goes Bananas
The Last Flight of Noah's Ark
Popeye
The Devil and Max Devlin
Amy
Dragonslayer
The Fox and the Hound
Condorman
Night Crossing
Tron
Tex
Trenchcoat
Something Wicked This Way Comes
Never Cry Wolf
Return to Oz
The Black Cauldron
The Journey of Natty Gann
One Magic Christmas
From the nadir of Disney filmmaking comes yet another spin on Mark Twain’s Connecticut Yankee, this time featuring Dennis Dugan as a NASA engineer accidentally sent back in time with his android twin Hermes. It’s not the worst movie we’ve covered for the show—the supporting cast of English comedians as Arthur’s court are fine—but it’s not exactly Bedknobs and Broomsticks.
Starring Dennis Dugan, Sheila White, Kenneth Moore, Ron Moody, and Jim Dale. Written by Don Tait and directed by Russ Mayberry.
This is a preview of our latest episode from Hollywood Avalon. Join the Mary Versus the Movies patreon for $3/month to hear this entire episode and the series Hollywood Avalon, where we watch Arthurian films: https://www.patreon.com/maryvsmovies.
The title is quite bad, though admittedly, this is a very odd movie - a porno mag is a fairly important plot device in the first half of this Disney movie, and there's a character who firmly believes her father to be a goose. It is also unexpectedly quite funny, though, and Jim Dale is, as usual, an excellent villain.