#vector perkins

[k00ldino]

so, for one of my finals we were tasked with coming up with a mock apology video script. naturally, i knew exactly who to write about and thought you all would appreciate it.

please enjoy my fake vector apology video script!

            The video opens with Vector setting up his camera and then taking a few steps backwards into position, this is to prove how genuine his emotions are, the rawness of his words. He is very clearly on the Moon with Earth visible behind him. Don’t ask how he was able to post this when there is, famously, no Wi-Fi on the Moon; something about science and his mad genius or whatever.

            The man is currently being criticized online for stealing the Moon, and seemingly everyone in the world is upset. News articles and commentary breakdowns of the situation are being published left and right. So, naturally, Vector needs to clear his name of these accusations! What is possibly worse than being viciously mocked and flamed on the internet for something you didn’t even do?

Vector: Hey… it’s me, the world’s number one most evil supervillain with both direction and magnitude. I don’t normally make videos like this, but I think there are some things that need to be addressed.

First of all, I wanted to confirm that I was, in fact, the one behind this epic moon scheme. I take full responsibility for any repercussions this may have caused. I personally apologize for stealing the moon, I see now that a line was crossed and I promise it will never happen again. I’m turning over a new leaf and I humbly accept any and all punishment that awaits me back on Earth.

Ignoring the blatant lie, the poor guy actually seems upset, but the video is nowhere near over yet.

But I mean, if you think about it, being banished to the moon is a pretty good sentence already. I’ve had a lot of time to think about what I’ve done up here, and I am seriously sorry, guys. There is really no excuse for my actions even if they did make sense within the context.

I’m asking you to have some compassion for my situation. If you were in my shoes, stuck in space like this with limited oxygen and no way home, wouldn’t you be rethinking your life choices too? Being faced with your own mortality really makes a man want to change.

He nods sagely and adjusts his glasses.

I’ve learned my lesson and I’m ready to come home now.

A pause…

But honestly, if anybody deserves to be punished, it’s that no-good copycat Gru! He totally stole my idea! That sorry excuse for a villain was just jealous at how much publicity my pyramid heist was getting and tried to sabotage me! Him and those stupid girls…

Up until now, Vector was getting off completely Scott-free for the pyramid thing. He just admitted to something he was never even accused of doing.

Let me be clear, the moon thing was my idea, 100% concocted by yours truly, and when Gru found out he sicced his children after me! Shouldn’t there be some sort of consequence for such a sorry attempt at plagiarism and child labor? I certainly should think so. My plan would have gone without a hitch if only Gru didn’t get involved. Your precious Moon would be safe and sound within my fortress, but nooooo, they just had to go and mess it all up! Typical.

His hand movements become more erratic, trying to emphasize just how wrong this whole situation is.

Gru sent his kids to my home dressed as Girl Scouts in order to spy on me! I’m not at fault here.

He points an accusatory finger at the camera.

Tell me you would pass up the offer of novelty cookies delivered directly to your doorstep. You can’t. You can’t expect me to ignore my natural human desire for overpriced, mass-produced cookies. I’m only a man, after all.

Now, he feigns distress.

I feel so… violated! How could someone be so cruel as to use an innocent baked good for their own twisted agenda. Between this, plagiarism, and theft, he and his menagerie of infantile crooks really had it coming. All this being said, it would only make sense for the next step to be enacting my revenge.

Kidnapping is a strong word, I would much prefer to call it “karma”.

Nobody said anything about kidnapping…

An eye for an eye, the moon for Gru’s offspring. If justice refuses to be served by our current political system, then matters are to be taken into my own hands. And, like, even if these kids were totally innocent, which they aren’t, wouldn’t you agree that this teaches them a valuable lesson in minding your own stinkin’ business? An important thing to be taught, indeed.

There is a cut in the video and Vector’s expression has shifted from that of frustration to overtly enthusiastic.

Today’s video is sponsored by BetterHelp! BetterHelp strives to make therapy affordable and accessible for all, on Earth and otherwise. With thousands of licensed therapists, BetterHelp is the perfect option for those struggling to find services in their area! Mental health support is just a click and a phone call away.

Use the link in the description or code VEC10 to receive a full month of appointments for free and a 10% discount for every appointment afterwards. Don’t let the stress of making an appointment keep you from taking the steps to improve your life, allow BetterHelp to take the hard parts of mental health treatment off your plate.

Now, back to the video!

We return to our regularly scheduled programming. Vector’s face has gone all red and he looks on the verge of tears. It almost makes you feel sorry for him…

Almost.

Why don’t you go steal dentures in the nursing home, old man!?

I demand that Gru face some sort of repercussion for everything he’s done. It’s not fair!

I already said I was sorry! Remember that? How I said I wouldn’t do it again? I’m sorry for stealing the Moon, I’m sorry for stealing a pyramid, even though it really was just sitting there and it’s not like anybody was using it. I’m even sorry for letting my shark attack people in the sewers.

He’s getting desperate.

What do you want from me? I’ll pay you! I will give $1,000 to whoever gets me off this stupid rock. In cash.

That’s all it is! A rock! Do you realize how utterly insane you all sound, pressed because someone took your favorite rock. If the moon never reverted back to its original size, I can assure you that everyone would get over it in, like, a month tops. Dramatic much?

After actually being on the moon, I can proudly say it’s a 4 out of 10 at best. I’ve been to more appealing places on Earth. Have any of you been to Egypt lately? Beautiful weather, wonderfully preserved culture, and the pyramids are just- oh. Right. Ahem.

In any case, the moon’s not all it’s cracked up to be. It’s kind of lame up here. I miss my Wii and there are weird aliens floating around. You guys should really get that checked out.

He looks off-screen, seems to notice something, and readjusts.

So, yeah. All that stuff, I’m very sorry about it. Thank you for forgiving me, I’m just glad we could come to an agreement. It’s really not that big of a deal.

Please send someone to rescue me, okay? Soon. Very soon. I don’t know how much longer I can stand to be without a phone charger.

Vector out.

The video ends and is miraculously uploaded to YouTube titled simply “i’m sorry.” As expected, it doesn’t tide over very well and a team of astronauts are eventually sent to retrieve him. Vector is brought back to Earth in handcuffs. The end.

[kermahillway]

Finished Squid Game season 2 recently and saw someone mention that Gru and his Minions would fit perfectly into the setting, and then my hand then proceeded to slip...

[kekreker]

I couldn't draw the eye. But a rich kid and always handsome. Thank you for letting me draw in your style, sis

[big-bad-wade]

[atricosa]

He's not your boyfriend, he's not your son. he's an egg.

[jaredbipka4536]

[enrickp]

[vampyriclykoi]

i really like these guys

sidenote i fucking hate drawing bratt, i live his design but actually drawing it takes many years off my life. so many years that i may as well end it everytime i pick up that pencil to draw him

hes wife though so its fine 🫶🫶

[unknownartperson]

WHITEBOARD DOODLES!! 💥

Last three are collabs w/ my friend, @hyperch1ptune!! :]

I like drawing hehehe

[vectorwife]

updated Vector itabag + look what some folks got me from Universal :)

[k00ldino]

HAPPY 3 YEARS TO THIS LOSER!!! my favorite orange guy of all time <3

[kermahillway]

I love when movies do crossovers like at the end of DM4 because that means I have a canonical reason to put them together in wacky situations and conversations. And those are my favorite!!!

[paint-tinner]

Whiteboard doodles ft some headcanons (Trans Vector + fat overkill) and also a younger macho

Bonus

[big-bad-wade]

I was chatting with my friend and he came up with the idea of ​​"four villains becoming a band and trying to conquer the world together" and I liked the idea so I drew this

This huge moving stage was designed by me

There are four electronic screens in the middle of the stage, corresponding to the four villains and with their own independent designs

I also designed the villains' clothes, but I don't have time to draw them in detail right now

but you should be able to see that Vector's clothes are a little different.

Thank you for reading this.

[bagelbun-art]

I don't remember when I made this. help

[jaredbipka4536]