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clowncroccharms · 7 years ago

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Klance Worry Send Help

I asked this of a friend, but I’d also like to hear a lot more opinions on it! I ask, as usual, please do not comment or message saying you agree with the problem, answer negatively saying the problem is happening, add your own fear to the problem, or in any way add to the anxiety that already exists. I ask only for solutions, helpful thoughts, etc.

Alright so here’s the dealio. I’m dying. And I’m dumb and awful at explaining my feelings so here goes nothing.

I am very worried as far as klances emotional scenes and such as compared to everyone else’s, especially allura and lances. I am worried about allurance, but that’s not what I’m worried about right here.

Okay, so, this season allura and lance got a lot of emotional scenes between them. Lance died and Allura brought him back, queue soft looks and emotional shit. Lance gave a speech about how much he cares about allura, then the most emotional of all, a tear filled full body hug after a break up. Then the scene that should have been klance, allura comforting lance over Shiro. Even though lance and allura aren’t together, they still got these emotional scenes.

Now, here’s where I’m worried. Klance hasn’t really gotten anything like this, and they aren’t together either. Sure we have the bonding moment, that kinda cancels out the near death allurance moment in emotional capacity, but it feels like aside from that, klance hasn’t gotten anything emotional, not as emotional as allurance. Sure, we had the black lion talks, hey man, leave the math to Pidge, but idk, were they really emotional? As much as the allurance scenes?

I’m worried that they won’t ever get scenes as emotional as allurance because it’s not straight or some bullshit like that. Sure, they’ve had some kinda emotional scenes, but no crying and comfort (which allurance has had twice in one season). It feels like the writers really are saying klance won’t get that emotional scene shit or emotional bonding that strong because it’s not straight. If klance becomes canon but has non of the big emotional scenes, then what’s the point? It won’t feel right. Even korrasami had the letters, and wheelchair stuff, etc. I’m terrible at explaining myself ugh.

Even korrasami got these emotional scenes (the letters, wheelchair, so many more tbh), yet with klance their emotional scenes haven’t really seemed, idk, super emotional? Besides the bonding moment of course and the hand on the shoulder was a little, but it wasn’t like, confessing love to a gang of mice, or sobbing into the others arms after a loss, etc. I’m fully aware Keith’s been gone since season 4, but a lot of the “semi-emotional” klance scenes happened before then.

I mean part of me thinks, okay allura is more emotionally outright, expressive, and accepting then Keith was (before mama kogane Bc he’s probably better now) and lance already liked her, whereas he probably hasn’t realized feelings for Keith yet, but allura and lance aren’t together, neither are Keith and lance, so I ask why haven’t Keith and lance had these equally emotional scenes as friends as well (real emotional hugs (Shiro and allura), And shit like that). I am worried it’s because it’s lgbt+ and the producers or DW know it’s lgbt+ so they won’t get as in depth with it, show the same level of emotion, or something similar. I want to be positive and hopeful, but I’m stuck on this and it’s really ruining it for me.

It feels as though every other set of characters has gotten emotional scenes (allura and lance, Shiro and Keith) but klance, which is most likely to be canon and is also lgbt+ has gotten so little? Maybe I’m underestimating the scenes they’ve gotten, but they don’t seem to harbor the same amount of emotions between the characters as lance and allura and Keith and Shiro (Not romantic she/th).

Anyways I guess what I’m trying to say here is we’ve seen other pairs get these huge ass emotional scenes that bring them a lot closer, for klance it seems like mildly emotional scenes but not really (besides the bonding moment) or it’s been turned into humor (I CRADLED YOU IN MY ARMS). Idk, it feels cheap I guess, it feels like we won’t ever get any sort of super emotional scene with klance that we’ve gotten with allurance. Even Keith and Shiro hugged it out, lance and allura, Keith and allura (awkward as fuck tho), but klance has gotten nothing. It doesn’t feel like they’re doing this for slowburn, or because it will come later, it feels like we won’t get it at all. Probably because it’s gay. Sorry, this was really long, but I’m really devastated right now and it hurts.

I think a big part of this ties into the worry that klance won’t be explicit. By explicit I don’t mean nsfw explicit, but I mean outright canon, not ambiguous like korrasami, but like it being clear and stated they are together, like any other hetero couple would be. For example, makorra was explicit. They stated their feelings aloud, kissed, held hands, I mean it was literally stated they were a couple. Lotura was explicit, they fucking kissed for gods sake. Korrasami was ambiguous because it wasn’t really affirmed they were a couple until the comics. They could have been seen as good friends. They never stated feelings, or did anything that was explicity a couple thing. I’m worried that because voltron is a “kids show” and run by dreamworks that we will get another case of ambiguity, Perhaps slightly more explicit than korrasami, but not much. It’s a big fear of mine that ties into the rest of this long ass post. I know they have Netflix but dreamworks is still I charge here.

Another point is Jeremy said the klance dynamic would be back in s7... but isn’t that dynamic the one where they have the not super emotional emotional scenes, does that mean they won’t develop further? I guess I’m probably reading too far into this one point here, but it still bothers me so I’ll put it here for your critique.

I know it’s very long, but this is seriously bothering me. I don’t know what to think of it, I’ve explained my feelings as best as I can. Again, please don’t respond with “I totally agree it’s awful”, add to the worry by bringing up more examples, etc. I ask that you help relieve this fear because it’s ruining my otp for me and I’m so saddened because my anxiety ruins everything good like this.

#klance #this is the worst anxiety ive had over klance #i cant get past it #please feel free to comment #or send an ask #or pm me #personal

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jokocraft · 8 years ago

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[long meta] the hidden depths of voltron S1 E6

part 1: lance’s literal awakening and keith’s metaphorical one

(if you already know where I’m going with this, you might find part 2: an entire subtextual plot in S1 E6? - in this same post - more interesting)

I’ve been rewatching season 1, and I got to episode 5 with the bonding moment and was like yeahh but then I got to the beginning of E6, with everyone waiting for lance to be released from the healing pod, and I was like wait. I never really thought twice about the scene before, but this time around I was like...hold the phone.

what is keith’s reasoning for being impatient in this scene, anyway? like, if everyone else can wait a few ticks for lance to wake up, why can’t you?

is this just your Personality, to be an impatient nuisance sometimes, haha queue comedic intro? well, while keith is often impatient, it’s usually during situations involving life or death decisions. and since lance isn’t about to die, and the timing of his release from the pod doesn’t put anyone else’s life at risk...

since i trust the vld writers enough at this point (at least with keith, i guess...?) to not make characters do shit for no good reason, i don’t think keith was being impatient for the hell of it, especially to do with someone he’s made a point of *Shrug* Not Really caring about -- that is, until shit went down in E5 and keith dropped that pretense like it was hot and didn’t hesitate to initiate the famed bonding moment.

my point here about this scene in E6, is that it’s directly linked to E5′s bonding moment, like 100%. maybe you’re like DUH OBVIOUSLY - and you’d be right, cause it’s obvious to me now and I was probably just being really slow on the uptake - but nevertheless, i don’t think we should hang up the the phone there...

i think that - well, with the “cradled you in my arms” line, we all kind of know - that keith took that bonding seriously to some extent. but to what extent? just seriously enough to be annoyed with lance’s response? personally, I think keith took it seriously enough that he truly believed a major shift had occurred between them - a shift, if my thoughts here are on the right track, he’d probably been hoping for (perhaps only subconsciously) since this scene:

it’s from the tail end of S1E2, after they successfully form voltron for the first time. i referred to this frame as “first time keith realizes that lance is actually kind of cool”. the way I interpreted this was that now, keith can no longer see lance as >insert stereotypes here< and predictable, but rather as someone interesting and possibly full of surprises and definitely worth paying attention to after all. but in this episode, keith’s still too closed off emotionally to acknowledge at maybe his new perspective of lance is making him wish things between them were different - not so they could be BFFs like lance and hunk are, but something else....something he can’t yet put into words (space ranger partners).

god they r all 3 uber-dorks okay

anyway

back to E6, I’m now imagining that keith has spent the last 24 hours secretly relishing the idea that he’s finally (for the first time in his life??) got himself a friend that is both a peer and someone that he feels instinctually closer to compared to other peers. (shiro is of course someone he feels instinctually closer to, but he is not quite a peer in age or maturity. the stuff can you do with a mentor/idol is definitely not the same stuff you can do with another shitting teenager like yourself).

buuuut we all know keith’s about to be disappointed when reality rears its ugly head and lance says some bullshit to allura again. “classic”. and so, from keith’s perspective, the reality is this: despite any shift between them that lance definitely felt (he saw it with his own eyes dammit), lance must have nevertheless interpreted it in a way did not put them the same page. fukin sux

poor keith. don’t we all hate when we hype something up in our minds and it turns out we were totally off the fucking mark all along? I imagine right now that he’s busy mentally burying his disappointment six feet deep. (note to remember for later: you can also see in the image above that shiro has the highest tolerance for lance’s shit.)

((((((( also eye-narrow worthy, but....perhaps...meaningless........hm:

when coran presents the ticker when the topic of ticks vs seconds comes up, hunk and pidge come over to look instantly. allura is shown walking over to the group moments later at 22:00 into the episode. shiro is shown watching from where he stands a few feet away. and keith is just ... ... ... absent from this exchange for 4 seconds before he’s briefly shown finally walking into the frame at 22:04. for four whole seconds he was just...what? staring, I guess? at lance, waiting, probably feeling determined to Be There when lance woke up. but not so determined that he’d risk someone calling him out for it. (but shiro is likely an exception for him: shiro doesn’t have his back turned, and so keith must trust him not to raise an eyebrow if keith kinda wanted to, you now, Be There.) )))))))

anywaaaaaay

we know that burying disappointment not so simple as pushing it away and never feeling it again. because like keith, when present reality doesn’t match our perceived reality, we’re like, “wtf? where did i go wrong? how did i misinterpret this? was I delusional?” and sometimes we’re like, “no, fuck you reality, I was not delusional, not this time, I was not wrong.” And voila, here you see keith in all that frustration: he’s planted himself as much in lance’s line of sight as he can without just straight up taking the yellow mouse’s seat right in front of the bowl of goo. keith clearly intends to be acknowledged. or at the very least, to glean some clue from lance’s behavior as to why he’s being Capital-I Ignored.

keith stays quiet during the conversation at the table until lance make a quip about the mice besting them all, and keith makes his salt known:

BITCH WHAT HTE FUCK? DID U NOT SEE HOW VALIANT I WAS PROTECTING YOUR ASS? I WAS THE SHIT! NOW STOP SPOONFEEDING THOSE FUCKING MICE I SWEAR TO

lance goes onto totally dismiss what keith did and this is....honestly not what keith expected

lance isn’t even making a dumb joke, he’s just being an asshole, plain and simple. keith now is like *softly* bitch what the fuck. “We had a bonding moment. I cradled you in my arms!” keith says, trying to look indignant, because alternative emotions are supposed be buried six feet deep.

but it’s no use, he’s stonewalled and subject-changed. and while we the audience know that the overly-defensive tone of lance’s stonewalling practically confirms that he remembers, we can only hope that lance realizes this too and is able to feel a pinch of salty relief.

it’s my conclusion that the whole point of these beginning scenes is not just to have some character interaction and a bit of thrown-in development, but to provide legit exposition and rising action to the fully-fledged subtextual plot of ep6. Read part 2 below, an elaboration of what I mean by this.

part 2: an entire subtextual plot in S1 E6?

(apologies to anyone else may have posted similar conclusions and I just totally missed them)

so here i get into are more circumstantial stuff. maybe my reasoning is clouded by ship-goggles, or maybe it’s the opposite, when armed with the interpretation lens that season 3 is all but dreamworks-signed confirmation that Keith and Lance’s relationship is intended to be something more than BFF friendship, and always has been, and everything about their relationship from S1E1 to S3E7 is very deliberate in order to make their future endgame as believable, nuanced, and in depth as is possible for a younger audience show.

assuming that this interpretation of S3 is not totally mistaken, then I contend that S1E6, in its entirety, is a far more momentous step in their relationship than all previous S1 episodes combined, including the bonding moment.

basically, hunk wants to fulfill his promise to save his girlfriend shay, but allura decides a new incoming distress beacon needs to be looked into first. they arrive, and very unlike shay’s introduction (S1E5), characterized by dull colors, distrust, and caution....

E6′s introduction to rolo and nyma is characterized by brightness colors, camaraderie, and repose. some quality irony here. tbh, It’s a fantastic way of fLipPing The ScrIPT if you ask me Hunk.

also I suppose it should be mentioned that shay is meant to be noted for her tattered clothes, androgyny, and lack of traditional beauty (but we aren’t fooled, shay is perfect) while rolo and nyma are clearly typed to be MUTHAFUCKIN SEX BEASTS. nyma is very overtly feminine and rolo is equally masculine.

as expected, lance swoons and does his gig. even says “Name’s Lance” which uh, de ja vu anyone ahem episode uno? as the episode progresses, it becomes clear that lance is going hella overboard, b/c even shiro (who, remember, has the highest tolerance for lance’s shit) is like for the love of fuck-

that night, there’s a bonfire, and rolo starts getting into his backstory. it’s worth noting that that besides space parents shiro and allura, keith is the only other paladin there listening. anyway rolo mentions sendak, immediately acknowledging him as a major threat. the point of that: considering just earlier in the episode, keith mentioned sendak’s threat to lance and lance promptly didn’t give a shit.....

even from profile view, keith’s expression in this frame ^ is distinctly similar to his expression from before (last frame from part 1), e.g. wide eyes revealing vulnerability, small frown, etc. i would take a gander that this is the moment that keith decides to...let things play out, rather than support hunk’s suspicions.

(why? maybe because he sees lance being a dipshit and if hunk’s right, and these people are liars and cheats, then lance is going to get what he deserves. but, i admit, such a theory has no basis in canon.)

meanwhile lance is being a dipshit and lets nyma inside the castle while the others aren’t looking. she plays him like a fiddle to get to the lions specifically, and at this point, the keen viewer is really starting to wonder why he’s being so dumb.

and this is important: I do not believe the writers were making him dumb because that’s his Personality. Just like keith’s impatience with the healing pod, there’s gotta be a reason behind his behavior beyond “that’s just how he is, that’s just what’s happening right now, don’t look into it too hard”.

I believe - going off of lance’s highly defensive refusal to acknowledge the bonding moment with keith earlier - he’s in a rather delicate emotional state right now, whether he consciously realizes it or not.

regardless of what keith might believe at this point, I think the reality is that lance sure as hell did remember. and although lance’s interpretation was probably different, it was different in the opposite way keith probably imagined (i.e. an even more dramatic and sentimental interpretation than keith’s). but the real divide between them at the beginning of E6 is their reactions to their own interpretations of the bonding moment:

keith reaction: omg a real friend?? for me?? maybe jesus does love me

lance reaction: lies jesus lies i have never had a gay thot in my entire life nope

one of the big reasons I’m fairly confident I’m not just making lance’s reaction up totally with ship-goggles is because of this slap-in-the-face parallel:

of ALL the things that could have been done, nyma is cradling lance in her arms, the very thing lance wants to deny even to himself ever happened with a certain someone else.

if you’re followin my theory, i think it could go like this:

because of the bonding moment, keith’s mind promoted his relationship with lance from we’re-both-in-voltron to F IS FOR FRIENDS, but i think from what can be seen of lance’s vastly exaggerated womanizing behaivor all E6, lance’s mind promoted his relationship with keith from grumpy-voltron-frenemy to ...

...

... something he can’t yet bring himself to put into words (space ranger partners, italicized coughcough)

honestly, the frame of lance in nyma’s arms is a little depressing when put in context with the beginning of the episode. what is lance thinking, in this moment? or trying not to think about? is he telling himself on repeat: this is what I want, this is what I wanted, this is how it’s supposed to go, this is who it’s supposed to be -- he’s 100% blushing when she asks him to take her on a ride around moon, holding him like this.

this post is cancelled if keith’s explicitly mentioned cradling is somehow not intended to be totally parallel to this scene right here with lance blushing.

(sorry little baby cuban, but it is not mindless bromance that is in your future.)

immediately after this, lance seems to check back into reality, and shows some resistance to nyma’s request. but then:

TRIGGERED

chances are, nyma made an educated guess that lance - like any hopeless romantic douche (psa i still love lance with my whole soul) - would react stupidly and competitively when threatened to be bested by another suitor. but there is a smidgen of possibility that she’s smart as FUCK (which there’s plenty of evidence of) and she knew that there could be only ONE1 reason lance could be overcompensating so obsessively. and out of other TeenPaladins, keith’s the hottest. i wouldn’t put it past this chick to put 2 and 2 and 5 together to get 69 and be correct.

bonus: she mentions how the minerals of the kinetic spring “reflect off the water, making a rainbow”. Also, I’m almost certain someone has pointed this out before, but I guess I’ll do it again - the bisexual flag colors are pink, lavender, and blue, and this background..!.............but that’s just whiteboard conspiracy silliness, surely. surely.

necessary? i think not

((((((( also on a related note, i’ve watched this clip below like eight times because I have a feeling that this sequence is some kind of subtle parallel or reference to something as well. on the surface, lance appears to be surprised and blush when nyma rests her head against his armpit side and starts laughing.

it just caught me off guard like, why would this bit be included? we already know that lance is infatuated with her, so what’s the point? why waste time and frames to keep making the same point? ... oR is there some other point that’s trying to be made and I am blind to see it? right now I can’t come up with anything, but if you have any ideas, definitely let me know. )))))))

meanwhile...

keith stap.

and so lance’s massive fuck up comes to a peak, and he’s so desperate for this thing with nyma to work (so desperate to prove to himself that nothing’s changed, he’s still the same, a beautiful girl is still what he wants, what he needs) that for one sad moment he’s actually willing to believe nyma’s a dominatrix before he’s willing to believe that she’d been playing him all along...

(how can I be mad at this boy?)

the others start the pursuit to save lance, and i think that it’s clever how keith was given the spotlight in the blue lion’s recovery via navigating the asteroid belt. that pursuit scene was very flexible in its requirements for how it needed to go, technically keith’s role doing that was interchangeable, and so the whole sequence could have been designed in a way to cater to another lion’s strengths. but.

“This kid can flat-out fly,�� says rolo. the title of this episode is “Taking Flight”. why would the title of this episode, in which, tbh, keith hardly does anything for a majority of it, be dedicated to this relatively predictable space car chase?

A: because it enables keith to say that he got is lion back. I saved your ass AGAIN and this time you can’t deny it!

and because of this experience, lance now has come to understand (to at least some extent) that there’s no point in wishing that he’d had his Magical Moment of Connection™ with some cool and pretty girl like he’d always imagined.

maybe, very very deep down, he’s begun to realize that the moment was only magical in the first place because it was with keith.

keith, who keeps coming through for him when it matters most.

the episode comes full circle, and - going along with my theory so far - the real conflict has been resolved. One might argue all that this “subtext” was just a subplot to the main plot of learning their lesson with the bounty hunters and always listening to hunk because he’s right and shay is 1000% more pure than rolo and nyma combined, tattered clothes be damned.

Or like me, one could argue that all that non-subtextual stuff (not counting the interspersed, juxtaposed scenes of Overarching Plot, Starring Your Hosts Haggar and Zarkon) was just an external plot chalk full of thematic parallels tailor-made to accommodate the true purpose of the episode: for lance and keith to come to terms with each other in the aftermath of the subtle but major shift that’s occurred between them.

lance took a big step in this one episode by going from total denial to verbal acceptance (for everyone to hear) of a bonding moment, in fact, existing.

and keith did good by accepting lance as he is and choosing not to continue resenting him for how he first reacted. its safe to say that keith progressed in character even more than lance, which I think is why he wins the focus of the episode title, because what he learned was that if he wants a deeper friendship with lance, fate’s not going to hand it to him in a healing pod. he has to do his part developing it. he has to work for it.

knowing keith, that’s a pretty tall order. but at least this time, keith got to Be There for lance after all.

Here is a follow up post: link

#klance #vld #voltron meta #meta #keith kogane

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spacemcclain · 8 years ago

Conversation

Matt: Hey Pidge, get your brother a milkshake yeah?

Pidge: Ok

Matt, seeing Pidge walk right by him with said milkshake and give it to Lance: ...Pidge?

Pidge: Last time I checked Lance didn't leave coordinates for where to find him on a grave in the middle of pieces of a dead planet with obscure messages of said coordinates in the grave that I probably would not have found if I hadn't been crying my fucking eyes out because I thought you were dead so...

Matt:...

Lance:...dude

#Lmao #vld s4 #I'm dead #pidge holt #matt holt #lance mcclain #the holts #dream meme team #we had a bonding moment... i cradled queue in my arms

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mariequitecontrarie · 8 years ago

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Mother Knows Best: Rumbelle 6x17 fix-it

Summary: Post 6x17 “Awake,” Rumple returns to the shop to tell Belle that the Black Fairy has Gideon’s heart, and Belle can’t keep silent any longer. Rating: T WC: 3294 A/N: Because I needed Rumple to talk to Belle about the Black Fairy having Gideon’s heart, and for Belle to confront the Black Fairy. Thanks to the wonderful @rowofstars for looking this over.

{On AO3}

This conversation wasn’t going to be easy.

Rumplestiltskin slowed his stride as he approached the front door of the shop, pulling out his pocket watch. It was nearly midnight, and he turned the key in the lock with a leaden heart. He wasn’t anxious to reveal what he had learned to Belle. The truth was, he’d been bluffing when he confronted his mother about holding Gideon in thrall. It had been a lucky guess based on magical intuition, and in her surprise, the witch had admitted her guilt.

He opened the door and hung his overcoat on the rack inside the door, pausing to light a few candles that dotted the tops of the display cases. Stop stalling, fool. He ran a hand through his hair and sighed, then dragged his feet toward the back room. Belle would yet be poring over magical texts both light and dark, as she had been every night, until the wee hours.

It was one of several areas on which they’d come to a compromise. They would pursue any and all possible ways of bringing their son back to them; nothing was declared off limits so long as they agreed to it together.

His wife was stretched out on the cot when he pulled back the curtain leading to the workroom, her favorite place in the shop to conduct research. Now that the Blue Fairy was convalescing at the convent, the back room was much less crowded. Belle was lying on her stomach like a child, feet in the air and crossed at the ankles, a collection of heavy, dusty tomes strewn about the mattress and the floor. The one she was reading was propped up on her pillow, and she flipped the pages, scanning each one at a furious speed as she searched for a solution.

No, this wasn’t going to be easy. Not that any of their conversations were anymore. How he longed for those idyllic days when they planned picnics, spent afternoons in bed, or when the most difficult decision they made was what kind of cheese to order on their hamburgers at Granny’s. He snorted; he could count those perfect moments on one hand.

“Rumple, you’re back.” Belle looked up from her studies. She closed the book and offered him a tentative smile, then her eyes narrowed in concern. “Are you all right?”

He shook his head with a rueful smile. Earlier today, Gideon had called that woman his mother, yet Belle’s primary worry was his welfare. It was so like her—unselfish, caring, forgiving. Suffering in silence while she bled through on the inside. “I’m fine, Belle.”

Shadows flickered across the walls, creating deep hollows in her face, and it dawned on him how pale and gaunt she was. The circumstances of Gideon’s birth and the events in the days that followed had taken a terrible toll on all of them.

Hot tears stung his eyes as he regarded her, small, lost, and alone, and he staggered a bit, leaning against the doorjamb for support. How long had it been since Belle had smiled a true smile, one that lit up her entire face with joy? He supposed it was the day in the Underworld library, when he told her she was pregnant. Then he’d spoiled their happiness with his revelation about the dagger, crushing her faith in him once more.

Every good and beautiful rite of passage had been stolen from her; her youth, the joys of being a bride, a normal, healthy pregnancy. Now even motherhood itself had been stripped away. And he—the one who had sworn to love, honor, and protect her for the rest of his days—he was the thief.

He closed his eyes and made a rare plea to the gods. He needed strength, strength and the words to tell Belle about Gideon’s heart. All he wanted to do was curl up and sob until sleep finally came, just as he had done the evening he shed the Blue Fairy’s blood. That night, Belle had been the one to comfort him; now it was his turn to be strong. Besides, they had promised each other total honesty, no matter what. It was another one of their compromises.

“Belle, sweetheart, there’s-there’s something I need to tell you.” He pushed a few books aside and sank down on the cot next to her. He enveloped her small, cold hands in his and took a deep breath. “The Black Fairy has Gideon’s heart.”

“I know.” The reply was a whisper.

“You do?” He stared at her, astonished. He supposed it was the inexplicable bond between mother and child that told her something was wrong, but he wondered why she hadn’t shared her revelation with him. “How?”

Her lower lip wobbled and she leaned toward him, resting her head on his shoulder. “I can’t explain it,” she said in a quivery voice. “Somehow, I’ve always known, but today when she came here and taunted you, that confirmed it. Those times when our son came to me in dreams, playing the part of Morpheus to twist my feelings, claiming you were going to tear us apart—it wasn’t Gideon or you. It was her. And I believed it. Every word. I didn’t even question it, didn’t ask for your thoughts or feelings. I’m so sorry, Rumple.”

She turned her face into his neck, and her cool mouth vibrated against his skin. “What have I done?”

When she pulled away, her face was crumpled in anguish. “Oh, Rumple. What have I done to our son?”

The demand was always the same, the same as it has been on that terrible night when they’d discovered that their newborn son had vanished without a trace. Had it really been only been a week ago? It seemed like he had lived another three lifetimes. Belle’s eyes brimmed with tears as she pleaded with him; for answers, for absolution, for hope.

He floundered, the right words eluding him; no response was good enough. No soothing phrase or sweetly crooned lullaby would make this nightmare go away. He pulled her close, tucking her head under his chin, rocking and shushing her as she sobbed.

Betrayal—it marked a person for life. How many promises had he made and abandoned? How often had he chosen the selfish path, only to leave Belle standing alone among the ruins, paying the price? The scars of his betrayal had crept around her heart, squeezing out her hope, and this once joyful, vibrant woman had shattered under the weight of his sins.

If she was ever going to trust him again, he needed to fix this mess and pick up the pieces.

Feeling helpless, he fumbled for his pocket square and began to mop at her wet eyes with trembling hands. “Belle, sweetheart, this isn’t your fault.”

“Don’t do that,” she said on a hiccup, shaking her head.

Stung by the rejection, he stilled, then moved his hand away from her face. “What, the handkerchief?” He tucked the damp silk back into his breast pocket.

“No, that thing where you blame yourself for everything.” She snorted a humorless laugh. “I can tell, you know. I feel you retreating inside yourself. Rumple, you’re not responsible for sending our son away. I did this.”

“Let’s not queue up the band for my Hero Parade just yet, all right?” he said wryly. “None of this would have happened if I hadn’t gone to such lengths…trapping you in that elevator, threatening to speed up your pregnancy. I’ve no excuse. If I’d given you any reason to trust me, I would have been there for his birth, holding your hand, guiding you through the delivery. You never would have needed to send him away or asked that gnat to play fairy godmother. We would be in our bed at home, and our son would be asleep in the nursery down the hall.” He choked on a sob.

She sighed. “We’ve both been absolute beasts, haven’t we? Now Gideon is paying the price.”

“Seems we all are.” He dropped to his knees beside the cot, cradling her hands once more. “But we will get Gideon’s heart back, Belle. I promise you that we’ll fix this. The Black Fairy will not destroy our family, I swear it.”

“I know,” she said, cupping his cheek. “I know because I believe in you.”

He tilted his head to lean into her touch, allowing his eyes to drift closed. He felt the brush of her lips against his, the sensation no more than a whisper, and he blinked in surprise. Her blue eyes were huge and uncertain in her pale face. He brushed her lower lip with his thumb, then he leaned forward, sealing her mouth with his, the taste of her salty and wet with tears. It was a kiss born of mutual comfort, not passion, or so he told himself, but his breath was ragged when he raised his head. “Belle?”

“Yes?”

He wiped the remaining tears tracking her cheeks with the pads of his thumbs. “Don’t doubt in the dark what you know to be true in the light. You’re a hero, sweetheart, and our son wants to be a hero because of your example. Never forget that.”

xoxo

Belle lay in bed, worrying her empty ring finger as the grandfather clock in the parlor beneath the floorboards of their bedroom tolled three o’clock. Her fingers moved to the chain around her neck, the metal and stone of her wedding band a comforting weight against her heart. Rumple’s arms were wrapped around her waist, his warm, even breath caressing the back of her neck.

Since the night Rumple had darkened his soul to keep Gideon from harming the Blue Fairy, they had begun sharing a bed again. Not to make love—they were too raw yet for that—but to offer hope and comfort. Falling asleep and waking up beside Rumple was a constant that helped her believe better days were ahead, that they could get their boy back and be a family again.

They’d clung to each other and cried that night, clawing and trembling in their anguish, unable to let go. Rumple had magicked Blue to the convent to recover, and they’d collapsed together on the cot and slept until sunlight streamed through the blinds. After that, it seemed natural for her to move back into the old salmon Victorian they had once called their home, and Belle transferred her things from Granny’s that day. She’d volunteered to claim one of the guest rooms, but they decided against the idea. Why clutch at straws after all they’d been through?

Sending Gideon away had choked out her bravery until there was nothing left. It felt like her own heart had been torn from her ribcage, and she was wary, snappish, questioning everything she had ever known to be true. But Rumple had been her strength and her hope. He still had faith in their happy ending. The trust they were rebuilding together was like spun sugar, fragile and beautiful. It was a delicate gift, a reminder to love one another better this time.

Though she was safe tonight in Rumple’s embrace, Belle couldn’t close her eyes. Each time she did, the waking nightmare returned. She saw her precious Gideon, cold and alone without his parents to hold him tight. Disturbing images of their boy being imprisoned, starved, and beaten, tortured her mind in a continuous reel. If it wasn’t Gideon’s face tormenting her, it was Rumple’s. Yet another lost boy, abandoned again and again, even by her—the one who had promised to love him even in the darkness.

Belle shifted onto her side to smooth the hair at Rumple’s temples, grateful that he slept peacefully. Deep grooves had settled around his mouth and eyes, and he’d looked bone-weary when he returned from confronting the Black Fairy tonight. When the Black Fairy had come to the shop to announce her arrival in Storybrooke, Belle had listened to her twisted promises and saccharine speech about a happy family with gritted teeth and clenched fists.

Talk about the mother-in-law from hell.

Carefully, she unwound Rumple’s arms from her middle and eased out of his embrace. Feeling her way in the dark, she slipped out of her nightgown and put on her clothes. She cast a wary look at the bed where Rumple slept undisturbed and rifled through his nightstand for paper and a pen. She dashed off a note and padded downstairs. If he awoke to find her gone with no explanation, he would fret and come looking. He might in any case when he knew where she was headed.

Restlessness beat in her breast like a drum, beckoning her to the woods north of town. She had words for that conniving witch, things that needed to be said tonight.

Brambles cracked and popped beneath the tread of her boots as she wound her way through the maze of trees. She stopped when she reached the valley where the Black Fairy had killed the field of pixie flowers. But in an act of defiance, their Gideon had kept one bloom alive. There was still hope.

“I know you’re here!” Her breath was a white burst in the frigid air. “Show yourself!”

The Black Fairy appeared in a swirl of black smoke, a cruel smile stretching her face. “Belle, darling, how sweet of you to pay me a visit.” She clasped her hands. “I was so hoping we would have a chance to chat and get to know each other.”

“I didn’t come for tea,” Belle said, fisting her hands at her sides. “I’m here with a warning.”

She stared back, and for a moment Belle was mesmerized by those haunted brown eyes. How could those eyes be so like Rumple’s and yet so different? His were filled with light and love; love for her and his children. Hers were dark and cruel, a barren wasteland.

“A motherly tête-à-tête?” Her smile was sly. “I’m touched.”

Belle trembled from head to toe, but she squeezed her knees together to still their knocking. Now that she was here, she was terrified, but she would never show it. “Don’t flatter yourself,” she said. “You’re not a mother. You’re vile, depraved, and barely human. I feel sorry for you.”

“You, sorry for me?” She pursed deep red lips. “You’re nothing but a vessel for the child of the Dark One, dearest. I’ve waited centuries for Gideon to be born. If it hadn’t been you, it would have been some other unsuspecting chit. Anyone could have done what you’ve done. Pushing out a baby doesn’t make you special.”

“What you did to Rumplestiltskin haunts you, doesn’t it?” Belle crossed her arms. “That’s why you’re demanding this sick, Oedipal version of a happy family now. You gave him away for the same reason you stole our son. Because of your lust for power. And you regret it every day.”

She cackled, the sound harsh and ugly in the still night air. “I regret nothing. Power is life—it’s all that truly matters. Life with Rumplestiltskin should have taught you as much. That same darkness that you claim to loathe in me rules your husband’s heart. You cannot have it both ways, dear. Dark or light. There is no in-between.”

Belle shook her head hard. “You’re wrong. If there’s anything I have learned, it’s the folly of seeing the world in black and white. There are gray areas. My husband uses dark magic, yes, but he uses it for good. Rumplestiltskin is a strong, courageous man. He has beaten back the darkness and chosen love while you’ve embraced hatred.”

“How sweet,” she simpered. “You’ve fooled yourself into believing that he loves you more than his precious dagger and he’s clever enough to make you fall for his lies over and over.” She cocked her head. “Like mother like son, perhaps.”

“No, he’s a good man with a loving heart and you can’t take that from him. No matter how hard you work to destroy him, you will never rip the love out of his heart. He’s nothing like you. He is good and kind and honorable and he loves his children with everything he is. Anything he’s done wrong he has done to protect us.” Belle inhaled the sharp, cold air. “Stay away from my family…or else.”

The Black Fairy laughed. “Or else what? You have no magic. You are nothing but a pretty face and a big brain filled with clever words. You’re a foolish girl who was tricked into giving away your baby, and now he’s mine. And soon, Rumplestiltskin will choose me, too. Then you’ll have nothing.”

Belle smirked, displaying a confidence she didn’t feel. Do the brave thing. “I might not have spells and potions and smoke and mirrors, but I have something more powerful and rare, something you’ll never have. True Love. And from what my husband has taught me, there’s no more powerful magic in all the world.” She narrowed her eyes. “We’ll get Gideon back and bring him home to us for good. And nothing you do will stop us from being a family.”

“Threats…from a hero?”

“You see, that’s just it.” Belle gave her a nasty smile and took a step forward. “I’ve never been very good at being a hero. Give me back my child’s heart. Now.”

“Mother!” In an instant, Gideon was standing between her and the Black Fairy, his eyes wild and dangerous. Belle didn’t know if the title referred to her or to the Black Fairy. “You shouldn’t be here,” he told her, his voice low and urgent.

Before she could speak, Gideon whisked her away, and deposited her on the front porch of the Victorian. Dizzy from the unexpected trip, she pitched forward, catching her hip on the porch banister.

She regained her balance and smoothed her hands over her belly, looking at her son. “You protected me,” she said softly.

“It was the right thing to do,” he said. “A hero’s duty, just like your book taught me.”

Belle reached for him, but he ducked away. His jaw was set in a hard line, but the twitch of his nose gave him away. She saw herself in the dungeon of a castle in another world, its master determined to send her away. Because of love. Because of fear. And a mission she couldn’t yet understand. Belle bit back a sob. Oh, Rumple. Our boy is so much like you.

“Gideon…” Belle swallowed. “We—”

“Mother, listen to me.” He settled a hand on her shoulder, his gaze warm and loving. “Do not come at the Black Fairy again. Please…I don’t want to see you hurt. I can live with anything but that.” He was shaking, his dark eyes wary as they darted toward the second story of the house. “I won’t say anything to Father about this.”

“It’s all right if you do, son.” She smiled sadly, then lifted her chin. “We don’t keep secrets from one another. Not anymore.”

He looked as if he wanted to ask what she meant, but then he stiffened, his face a hardening into an impenetrable mask. “Fine.”

Belle knew he would say no, knew there was no use in asking so long as the Black Fairy held his heart, but she could no more stop herself from speaking to her child than she could stop the tide from crashing against the beach. With or without his heart, she had to let him know he was wanted, needed, that there was a place for him, with her and with Rumple, whenever he chose. Always.

Belle moved toward the door and opened it wide, then stretched out her hand, meeting Gideon's now cold gaze. “Come home?”

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#rumbelle #rumbelle fic #rumbelle fix it #rumplestiltskin x belle #the gold family #the black fairy #gideon gold #mqc writes #mother knows best

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