#we're very sorry for the slow start but we're getting there!

[cinnasalmon]

→ Zevlor SFW Alphabet

Various SFW relationship (mostly romantic, but some platonic too) headcanons, one letter at a time! Very long. Sorry not sorry. I have a lot of thoughts

NSFW Alphabet coming soon !

→ A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

Doting to the mf MAXIMUM. It's almost sickening. He's not super into PDA, but he will always have a hand on the small of his partner's back and be the first to open doors so he can hold it open for them. This has a risk of other couples in public to start arguing because “how come you're not like that with me?” 

For real though he is so affectionate, and it's always the little things, too. Like if he's on his way back from the temple and a food cart is offering a free sample of something, he asks for another to bring to his sweetheart.

→ B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

Mom/Dad/Parent friend. Overly responsible, always offering to help, and it's one thing when someone comes at him sideways—he can take the heat (begrudgingly)—but it's an entirely different thing when it's one of his buds. He has an extremely small friend circle, and he considers them family.

Friendship progression is slow and really only happens if he sees them regularly: a regular at the temple or they work together there, they're his neighbors, etc. He's got trust issues out the wazoo, though (thanks Avernus/Elturel). So be very, very patient. 

→ C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

YES goodness gracious yes. He loves cuddling, or any kind of physical touch. Big spoon, little spoon, it does not matter to him so long as he's in physical contact with his partner. 

Though, he prefers as much of his body flushed against theirs (the more skin-on-skin contact, the better); we're talking arms holding each other, legs tangled, heads buried in the other's, etc. If his partner is also a tiefling, their tails will be intertwined as much as possible. If his partner is a non-tiefling, his tail will be coiled around one of their legs.

→ D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

He's been wanting to settle down for decades. But, a Hellrider is for life. His career was always to be his priority: even if he had a family at home, even if his own life was in danger. 

But the moment he can finally settle down, soldiering days behind him, you can bet he'll be pitching in happily to the household chores. He may not be the greatest cook, but he'll tease he can chop the hell out of a vegetable.

→ E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

Oh this is a nightmare scenario for him. He'll exhaust every possible option of salvaging the relationship before resorting to this. Once he commits to his partner, he doesn't let go easily. But if it comes down to it, he'll plan it out and whip out the ‘ol “We need to talk.” 

From being a commander in the past, he's not afraid of confrontation, but he'll still be gritting his teeth as he bites the bullet to end it. 

→ F = Fiancé (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

As stated above, once he commits to his partner, he's locked in; he dates with marriage as the end goal. Whether he's been married before or not, at his age now, this is it. So, he'll take his time before deciding to pop the question. Buuut he doesn't wait forever, though. He's a classic romantic, so no games or leading someone on. If his partner reciprocates with the same enthusiasm? Well he'll be down on one knee in no time.

→ G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

Paladins who swear to an oath of devotion follow a set of tenants, one of these is to aid others, protect the weak, and punish those who prey upon them (labeled under Compassion). A sturdy and strong hand to slay enemies should also be capable of being soothing and with great care to those the paladin is sworn to defend. Zevlor is no exception to this. Even if his oath is broken, it's still in his nature to be like this.

As far as emotions? Much as he may try to appear stoic and calm, he wears his emotion on his face. And despite having the flames of Hell sat on onyx for eyeballs, they show a lot. I personally love the headcanon that the flames will brighten or dim depending on his emotions and I will stand by that proudly.

→ H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

As stated before, physical touch is something this man wants at nearly all times. So it's no surprise he gives great hugs. They're so gentle and calming, and even if the person he's hugging is taller or bigger than him, they'll feel enveloped by his touch. And being a tiefling, his body temperature runs higher, so his hugs are nice and toasty. 

He'll embrace his partner often, and he particularly loves hugs from behind (both giving and receiving). People hug from the front all the time, so coming up from the rear is quite a bit more intimate. He craves closeness in every sense of the word.

→ I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

He'll want to say it much sooner than he finally does. This is sooo cheesy, but he'll be staring at the side or back of his partner, feeling that wave of nerves, butterflies in his stomach, and the swells in his chest, but those short little words are caught at the top of his throat. His partner will notice him and curiously ask, “What are you looking at?” and he will say, “Sorry, I… was drifting in thought,” until one day his partner will once again curiously ask with an accompanied chuckle, “What are you looking at?” to which he will blurt out “I love you.” 

→ J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

This man will  n e v e r  admit he's jealous. But boy does it show. His words are short, blunt. He won't look his partner in the eye. They'll have to coax it out of him. Simply asking “Wait, are you jealous?” will not work. In fact, it will likely send him further into painfully obvious denial.

Since his oath and faith were broken and lost, his ego is um… quite fragile, moreso when it comes to things in his life he believes he doesn't deserve. Like his partner. Especially his partner. 

→ K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

His kisses are so sweet your blood sugar levels will skyrocket. 

So, so gentle and loving. He can certainly be rough when the time calls for it, but overall he's slow and even methodical a bit; he kisses like each one could be his last.

In public, he'll give a peck here and there, but at home? Showers his partner in kisses. Everywhere. It's one of the easiest and simplest ways to show how much he truly adores them.

He doesn't really have a preference where he likes to be kissed, but he blushes a bit and feels soft and mushy when it's anywhere on his face (especially cheeks, temples, and forehead) or any of his infernal features on his body. If his partner kisses the back of his hand, he'll freeze for a moment, then the bashfulness comes out.

→ L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

He loves kids! I'd like to think that if asked what he would be if not a Hellrider, he would answer a schoolteacher (shout out to Early Access). He sees children as limitless potential with an insatiable curiosity; they are the future. And of course, he's always wanted children of his own, and perhaps a part of him still wants to try…!

→ M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

Slow and easy. Decades of being a Hellrider waking up before dawn to report for duty? He is over it. Now he can finally take his time and savor the mornings.

If he's up before his partner and isn't helping out at the temple that day, he'll stick around and read a book until he hears them stirring awake. Once they're awake, it doesn't take much coaxing to get him back in bed. 

If both end up sleeping in, they're not leaving that bed for at least an hour after they wake up. Just cuddling and chatting, enjoying each other's company. Afterwards, they always make breakfast together.

→ N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

Evenings are typically relaxing. After dinner, he'll read or write a bit (he loves his poetry), have a glass of wine or two with his partner, or any other similar winding-down type of activity. 

He has insomnia and frequent nightmares, and no matter how many nights his partner will be adamant to stay up with him, the warmth radiating from his body as well as the soothing baritones of his voice guarantee that will never happen.

→ O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

He harbors a lot of secrets and stress within him. He's very wise, but oftentimes wisdom is formed from hardship. He's reluctant to share much aside from surface-level tidbits until the relationship matures and he feels safe and secure enough to let his guard down. Even then, he's definitely someone who will still reveal things about himself years into a relationship or friendship.

→ P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

He has a temper for sure, especially if a soft spot was hit. That being said, he's also quick to calm himself. Being a leader—a leader in the military, at that—he cannot let himself get caught up in the heat of the moment; he has to catch himself before it gets to that point, even if his anger is justified (see: the confrontation with Aradin).

→ Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

He's got a pretty good memory, but when it comes to his relationship? Almost nothing will need to be repeated to him. Hell, he'll write it down on scrap paper and tuck it in one of his journals if he has to. 

If his partner works at a busy place in the city, he'll remember every co-worker his partner complains or raves about. Our man stays on top of the work drama: “Had a long day, darling? Was it that Galawyn again?”

→ R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

I think Zevlor's favorite moments in a relationship would be the little moments. Hearing his partner's fits of laughter, how peaceful they look asleep next to him, the way their eyes light up when they see a poster that their favorite traveling bard will be performing in town soon. 

And of course, it goes without saying his all-time favorite moment would be the classics: the wedding day and/or the birth of their child!

→ S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

HAh this man is a guard dog. Even before they become a part of his oath, he's adamant to protect his person, his one and only. During the budding/honeymoon stage of the relationship this will be extremely obvious. Lots of, “Dear, please be careful with that,” or “Would you like me to accompany you?” As if they didn't personally kill the Chosen of the Dead Three along with a Netherbrain. 

But for Zevlor to be the protected one? On the outside, he'll insist he's fine and that he can hold his own just fine, he's a grown man, etc. And he is right. But on the inside, he'll be so relieved to be tended to. So relieved, in fact, that he actually feels a bit guilty (but that's a whole other can of worms).

→ T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

Oh he'll remember. He keeps track. Never will need to be reminded of something. He's someone who has that uncanny ability to bring his partner a random gift and they'll respond “How did you know I wanted this?!” and the bastard will shrug and smirk. He knows. He just knows. 

→ U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

His biggest one is he will easily and nearly automatically put himself down at every opportunity. Early in the relationship it's to the point he doesn't even realize he's doing it until it's pointed out. He's always had this mindset to a degree, but even still, he was a much different person in Elturel as a Commander vs. now. The trauma from Avernus combined with the aftermath of being blamed for it (and then subsequently exiled), as well as the events of the Shadow Lands, all did a number on his psyche.

I'm also not gonna lie—he can be a little codependent, especially if the relationship is new. It's easy to fall down that slippery slope when you want to serve others, especially loved ones. He may occasionally have to be reminded he can be “selfish” and accept the fact his partner can do things for him that he doesn't need to reciprocate!

→ V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

Not terribly concerned. Well, not terribly concerned unless his partner is young and/or considered attractive by others (though he will always believe they are the hottest in all the land), then he'll feel very self-conscious and in need of some validation and reassurance. 

He does like to maintain good hygiene and prefers to wear simple, clean, and comfortable clothes. 

→ W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

He's a sappy romantic at his core, so once he finds his person, he will absolutely say they complete him.

While he had his comrades in the cavalry, all who were extremely close-knit and loyal to one another, they couldn't fill all his wants and needs. When they were able to take some leave, many of them had spouses and children waiting for them to come back home, and Zevlor had always lamented that.

→ X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

We got a nail biter over here! I recently saw this front-view of an idle animation as he stood over the map of Elturgard, and while it very well could be a generic idle animation not specific to him, imo, the shoe fits perfectly I'm afraid. 

He holds his hand over his mouth somewhat nervously, and you could say he's just pondering but I don't care! He's biting his nails okay!!!

→ Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

In a partner: if they're non-committal. No guessing games, wishy-washy, flaky nonsense. However, he is willing to wait if they want to take it slow and work through some stuff (and he'll be happy to assist them in any way he can). He just doesn't want to be with someone who treats him as a backup or if he feels like they're just settling for him.

In general: I have 0 evidence for this but I think he doesn't like tight spaces. Claustrophobia, if you will. Perhaps it's a lack of an easy escape or is limited in his movements, but he haaaates it. Even being in a crowd makes him uneasy. 

→ Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?)

After canon events, he takes naps frequently. All that stress and his nervous system stuck in survival mode for the past several months will catch up to him, and to try and recover, he'll feel sleepy a lot. Known to begin to drift to sleep while embracing his partner, even while standing (he will deny this if confronted).

He also snores. Not loudly by any means, but it's a dead giveaway that he actually made it into a nice, deep sleep, as he's normally a light sleeper and has some gnarly insomnia sometimes. Almost always falls asleep after his partner and wakes up before them in the morning.

———

If you made it this far congrats! Also I encourage you to fill out this alphabet too, for Zevlor or whoever!

[dp-time-police]

Danny: "Do we give you a codename too?" Clockwork: "I don't need one." Danny: "What about Cogswort-" Clockwork: "No."

[barrymccaulkinem]

did yuo know: The Talos Principle is the best video game ever made? in terms of artistic quality AND puzzle design.

now you know!

[jareaul0ver]

Save a Horse, Ride a Cowgirl

Summary: A night out with the girls leads to an even better night at home with your girlfriend.

wc: 1.3k warnings: SMUTTY, touchy!nika, dom!nika, reader riding nika's abs, breast touching, slight fingering (?? i wouldnt even call it that, but i cant think of a better word), nika speaking in croatian because its hot as fuck pairings: nika muhl x fem!reader

UConn had just beaten Southern California, and they wanted to celebrate. They were moving onto the final four and they couldn't be more ecstatic. They wanted -- needed -- to celebrate.

Paige had told everyone about a bar that isn't too far from campus, and the team decided to go. You weren't on the team but as Nika's girlfriend you obviously were invited. All the girls loved you, and you loved them.

You sat on the couch of your dorm, waiting for Nika to finish getting ready. The theme of the bar that night was wild west. You were surprised when Nika said she had the perfect outfit, you never expected her to own anything country.

She finally left the bathroom and looked at you with a smile. "You ready?"

You looked up at her and raised your eyebrows. She looked good. She had a white cropped button up on, a pair of light wash jeans, a pair of cowboy boots, and a tan cowboy hat. A sliver of her stomach was showing, revealing her toned abs and belly button piercing.

You stood up and walked over to her, placing your hands on her waist. "God, you look.." You just laughed and shook your head. She blushed a little and took your face in her hands.

"You don't look that bad yourself." You were wearing an orange cropped tank top, a very short pair of jean shorts, and a pair of sneakers. You didn't own anything country.

She pulled your face close to hers and pressed a soft kiss on your lips. She pulled back and let go of you. "We don't want to be late."

A low groan was heard from behind her as she turned around to leave. She looked back and shot you a small glare. "Sorry." You mumbled before the two of you left.

The entire night, you couldn't keep your hands off each other. If Nika needed another drink, you went with her. If someone called you over to talk to you, she went with you. The sexual tension was thick, you were practically walking through a cloud of smoke when you were next to each other.

A guy dressed in full cowboy attire went onto the small stage and spoke into the microphone. "Alright, y'all, we're bringin' out the bull!" The entire bar cheered as another guy rolled out a mechanical bull.

Paige came in between you and Nika and put her arms around your guys' shoulders. "If one of you can stay on it for 45 seconds, I'll give ya twenty bucks."

Nika immediately shook her head no, but you shot Paige a daring glance. "Bet." You said, the alcohol you ingested had given you the confidence.

You waited in line for your turn on the bull. Once you finally got up there, you straddled the machine. It started slow at first, but quickly picked up speed.

At one point you glanced over at Nika, and the look she was giving you sent chills down your spine. You knew you were in for it later.

To everyone's surprise except nika's you lasted more than a minute on the thing. Once you finally fell off, Paige came over to you with a 20 dollar bill in her hand, reluctantly placing it in yours. You pocketed it and gave her a smirk.

You went to turn around, but felt a pair of hands on your waist. Nika leaned into your ear and whispered. "You're gonna pretend to be sick and dizzy after that, and we're going back to the dorm." The tone in her voice was easy to determine, and your body shuddered.

"Okay," you said breathlessly. You did as she said, both of you playing off your departure as your sickness.

The two of you walked into your dorm, and you shut the door behind you. Nika wasted no time in pressing her front against your ass, pinning your front against the door. You gasped and your eyes fluttered shut when you felt her placing hot kisses on your neck.

Her hands came around to your front, one slinking up the bottom of your shirt to massage one of your tits, the other moving to unbutton and unzip your shorts. "Nika." You breathed hastily.

"Hm?" She hummed against your neck, her breath making goosebumps rise.

"Where's-" She slipped her hand down past your underwear and ran a finger through your already soaked cunt. You groaned, leaning your forehead against the door. "Where's this coming from?" You made out between breaths.

"You looked so good riding that bull, baby. I can't help myself." She husked. She gathered up some of your slick and rubbed small circles against your sensitive clit.

A low whine escaped your lips at her touch. She pulled her hands away from you, but before you could protest, she was already carrying you over to your bed. She set you down and laid down on her back next to you.

She pulled you onto your lap and hooked her fingers in two of the belt loops on your shorts. "Off." She tapped your hip and you quickly obliged, slipping the shorts off and tossing them onto the floor.

She brought her hands up and lifted your top over your head, discarding it somewhere. This left you in only a pair of white, lacy panties.

Your chest heaved as you stared at her, watching her deep brown eyes flickering from every part of your body. She bit her lip and put her hands on your hips, pulling you up to rest on her stomach.

"So wet for me, I can feel it through your panties." She was right. You were soaked. It was almost funny how quickly she could turn you on. There wasn't much time to process her words, however, as she used the grip on your hips to start grinding you back and forth.

She took the hat off her head and placed it on top of yours, in true "save a horse, ride a cowboy" fashion.

"Fuck-" You groaned. You felt her toned abs underneath you. You started moving your hips on your own accord, creating a rhythm that felt perfect against your core.

You ground yourself against her, the same way you had to while riding the bull. "Been thinking about this since the second you got on that machine." She said lowly, keeping one hand on your waist, and bringing another up to knead the skin of your breast.

You threw your head back, and the hat slipped off. "Yeah?" You somehow managed through your pants. You rolled your hips further, and hit a spot just right. Her belly button ring had brushed against your clit. Her name spilled out of your lips in an ungodly sense.

Nika caught onto what you were doing, and dropped her hand back down to your waist, speeding up your motions. Your juices soaked your panties and covered her stomach. She didn't care how messy you were, she was loving this.

"That feel good?" She licked her lips as she watched you. You nodded your head frantically, but couldn't manage any words. "Speak, baby."

"Fuck.. yes, Nika-" she thrusted her body upwards, making your back arch. "Shit- I'm close, baby." You whimpered.

She helped you speed up your pace. She felt your movements become more sporadic as you neared your orgasm. Sweat coated your body and you felt the knot tighten in your stomach. Nika could tell you were about to cum. "Cum for me, ljubavi."

Her speaking in her native tongue was enough for you to finally break. A string of curses, followed by her name left your mouth. Nika slowed the movement of your hips, letting you ride out your high, but trying not to overstimulate you.

You climbed off her lap and laid down next to her. She quickly got undressed, went to the bathroom and cleaned herself off, and laid back down, turning on her side to face you. You were laying on your back, your chest heaving. She gently cleaned you, trying to be careful around your sensitive area.

"Holy shit." You breathed out.

"Holy shit." She chuckled, wrapping her arm over your stomach and pulling you into her. You turned onto your side, tucking your head against her neck.

[mingtinys]

" i already have the world "

pairing : jeon wonwoo x gn!reader

"13 ways to say "i love you" with seventeen"

warnings : none

word count : 0.5 k

a/n : unsure if i'm happy with this , but the writers block was BAD and so i ended up falling victim to the gamer!wonwoo trope

You truly wonder how Wonwoo still finds it in himself to wake up as early as he does to make his various schedules. Especially when it's already two in the morning yet he's still locked in on his computer screen, furiously clicking away. Meanwhile, you're walking a very thin line of consciousness.

If it weren't for the giant glowing monitor and the voices shouting through Wonwoo's headset, you probably would've lost your battle against sleep by now. And judging from the increasingly irritated shouts of Seungcheol and Jihoon for Mingyu to "go left," it sounds like Wonwoo's team is losing theirs.

"Your other left, idiot," You just barely make out Jihoon's exhausted words. "Wonwoo, please help him, you're closest."

"Yeah, I'm already on it. Someone cover me–" There's a pause, then a sad tune plays and you force your eyelids back open just wide enough to catch the giant "LOSE" written across the display. "Never mind, good game."

"It was most definitely not," Seungcheol complains.

"One more round?" Mingyu asks, even though this is their fifth "one more round."

"Yeah, just give me a minute and we can start," Wonwoo says before promptly muting his mic. He nudges you with his shoulder, earning a very unamused groan back in response.

"You can go to bed if you want," he chuckles.

"Alone?" You whine, which only makes him laugh more.

"You're right, what a ridiculous idea," he teases. "This is the last one for real this time, promise."

You're head falls to Wonwoo's shoulder with a sigh. He readjusts, allowing you to rest more comfortably. With your newfound pillow, sleep easily consumes you.

Your breathing slows down to a steady pace almost instantly and Wonwoo glances down with a soft chuckle. "I'm sorry I kept you up," he whispers, placing a feathery kiss on the top of your head.

He unmutes his mic. "Hey, sorry guys, I'm gonna log off for the night."

"What? Dude, we're just about to start. Please don't leave me with Seungcheol and Jihoon!" Mingyu urges. Wonwoo contemplates it, a match would only be around twenty minutes. But one more look at your sleeping form and that thought is gone as soon as it comes.

"Sorry, it's late, good luck though."

"Wait!" Mingyu tries again. "What if I buy you lunch tomorrow?"

"Goodnight, Mingyu."

"A coffee? Your favorite pastry from that bakery half an hour away? The world? What's it gonna take?"

"Mingyu, stop being dramatic and let the man go to bed." Seungcheol chastises.

Wonwoo secures his arm around your waist and pulls you against him when he notices your head slipping from his shoulder. An action that makes you snuggle further into his side in your unconscious state. Perhaps his heart has gone a little soft, but no offer could possibly amount to the moments like these he gets to spend with you.

So while lunch and a coffee is a tempting offer, it simply doesn't compare. "Besides," he says in a last goodbye into the mic. "I already have the world."

taglist: @matchahyuck @dontwannaexsist @minnieminshi

[woso-dreamzzz]

Outburst

Leah Williamson x Jordan Nobbs x Child!Reader

Summary: You want hugs

The breakup with Jordan went fairly smoothly where the feelings were involved. Where it got a bit gritty was with you.

At three years old the travel between London and Birmingham was hard going and you didn't quite understand why you had to do it or why Mummy moved in the first place.

"Come on, bug." Mum tries to feed you, nudging a fork loaded with pasta against your lips. You turn you head away stubbornly.

Arsenal isn't as fun without Mummy here and you refuse to let Mum lighten your mood. So, you stay stubborn and ignore her.

Leah, for her part, is very confused at your change in attitude. She knew that there would be an adjustment period for everyone involved and she knew it would probably hit you the hardest.

But you'd had an attitude with her the whole week as soon as you got back from Jordan's and Leah can't quite work out why. She wondered if she'd been mean or rude to you but she knew that she hadn't so your change in mood is very disconcerting.

She's not getting very far with you so drops the fork and checks the time. There's still a full day of training to get through but Jordan hasn't got any so she's been driving down from Birmingham to pick you up for the week.

Leah sighs deeply at your stubbornness as you push your lunch plate away and sullenly pull at the table cloth.

"She'll come around," Lia says, reaching out to offer some comfort," It's just a hard adjustment."

Leah huffs. "Yeah, I guess so but-Bug! We don't hit!"

It was almost in slow motion that Leah watched you slap Lia's hand where it's holding hers.

"No!" You screech, not paying any attention to your mum as you scream at Lia. "No touching! She's mine! Mine! Not yours!"

You climb from your seat and grab Leah's arms to force them around you in some semblance of a hug.

"Hey," Leah forces her arms away. "No. We don't hit, bug! Say sorry!"

Your bottom lip wobbles as Mum stops hugging you, leaning away from you as she looks at you with a stern expression. "Hugs!" You whine," Hugs for bug!"

"No," Leah corrects," No hugs for bug until you apologise."

Your face turns stormy and your expression mimics Leah's perfectly. "Hugs!" You insist," Hugs! Now!"

"Say sorry," Leah continues," And then say please and you'll get hugs."

"No! Want hugs now!"

Leah squeezes her eyes shut for a moment to draw herself together before she moves. She hoists you up onto her hip and walks you over to the corner. At first, when you think that she's giving in, you go limp but as soon as you see where she's going, you start kicking and hitting.

"No! No! No!"

"Yes," Leah says firmly," We don't hit and we're not rude, especially not to me. Five minutes in the corner and then you can say you're sorry and we can have cuddles."

"No!" You bite out," Don't want cuddles from you! You're mean!"

Leah tries not to take it to heart. She knows that when she's angry she says things in the heat of the moment but you look so certain of yourself and so angry that it looks like you're being serious.

You fight being put in the corner but once you're there, you know to stay and Leah always makes sure to sit closer so you don't feel like you've been abandoned.

"What's going on?"

She hadn't even realised Jordan's arrived until she speaks.

Leah doesn't look away from you. "Bug hit Lia and she's demanding things again when she knows she needs to use her manners. She's having some corner time."

"Leah." Jordan sounds a bit worried. "She's only little. She doesn't understand."

"If she's old enough to hit and demand things then she's old enough to know that being rude and mean has consequences. It's not like I'm overreacting, Jordan."

The look Jordan gives her kind of makes Leah feel like she doesn't agree. In fact, Jordan approaches you, tapping your shoulder to let you know you can turn around.

"Hey there, bug," She says," What's going on?"

"Want hugs!" You yell, looking between her and Leah," Both! Want hugs from both!"

"Hey!" Leah says sternly again," You need to say please!"

You look at her in rage, like you can't believe that she's denying you again. Mummy never denies you cuddles. She's always touching you and giving you kisses and holding your hand.

She never makes you say please.

"Hug!" You turn to Mummy to show Mum what she's supposed to be doing. "Hug! Now!"

"Jordan!" Leah complains when Jordan immediately hugs you.

She rocks you back and forth for a moment and you instantly deflate.

You reach an arm out to Mum. "Hugs, now," You say, infinitely calmer but a lot more determined," Like Mummy."

"Bug," Leah says," You have to say please."

"Leah," Jordan interrupts," Just give her a hug. She'll stop screaming if you hug her."

Leah shifts closer but doesn't hug you. "You need to say sorry to Lia," She says again," Because it's rude to hit."

You huff. "Lia's not family," You respond," Doesn't need to be touching you."

"What?"

You shuffle out of Jordan's arms but take care to keep holding one of her hands. "Don't need to touch you," You insist. You grab Leah's hand and she lets you because you're trying to explain your feelings and she doesn't want you to be discouraged and shut down like earlier this week.

You pull Leah's hand and connect it to Jordan's, wrapping around both of them so they can't pull away.

You seem proud of yourself, puffing out your chest. "Hugs now!"

"Hey, wait, no," Leah says quickly," Manners, bug. We've talked about this."

"Mummy doesn't make me use manners when I want cuddles." You shrug. "Just have to want one."

Jordan, at least, has the sense to look a bit embarrassed.

Leah never likes to critique Jordan's parenting skills. She's a great mum but there are things that tend to grind Leah's gears. It's not that she thinks that she's better or her way is best (Leah knows that she's not the perfect parent) but giving in to your every want when you're being rude about it is one thing that really annoys her.

"It makes her happy," Jordan defends," And it saves all the tears and tantrums."

"Jordan," Leah groans," She can't just demand everything."

"Leah," Jordan says back," You haven't even scratched the surface of her tantrums. She's always been your perfect little angel." There's a hint of bitterness in Jordan's tone that makes Leah feel a bit bad.

She's right, of course. Before the breakup, you were nothing short of a little angel for Leah, following her like a shadow and lavishing in her company. Jordan had always had to work a little bit harder to gain your approval, even going back as far as the day your care worker brought you home to them.

Leah sighs deeply and pulls you a little closer.

"Bug," She says, a lot gentler than earlier," You need to go and apologise for hitting Lia." You make a face but Leah continues on. "Thank you for explaining with your big girl words but I think big girls like you understand when they've been a bit naughty."

You nod sullenly, your bottom lip jutting out in a pout.

"And then, if you still want cuddles, you need to say please, okay?"

You shake your head. "No! 'Cause Mummy's here now! Can't have Mum cuddles!"

Leah and Jordan exchange confused looks.

"Why can't we cuddle now Mummy's here?"

"'Cause I've got to go home with Mummy! Can't cuddle with you if I'm with Mummy!"

You look close to tears, tears of sadness rather than the tears of anger earlier.

Leah's face softens. "But do you still want cuddles with me?"

"Please!"

"Okay," Leah says," Here's what we're going to do. Mummy's going to take you over to Lia and get your lunch. You're going to say you're sorry for hitting Lia and then we'll all sit down together, have some cuddles, finish your lunch and we'll get you on your way with Mummy. How does that sound?"

You nod. "Yes, Mum."

"Okay." Leah presses a soft kiss to your temple. "Let's get started then."

[arsenalfanf1]

can I request a smut? if you don't wanna do it you can just ignore me ig, but i'd like something where lando is the one that always gives, he'd rather be the one to give than receive, but one day we're desperate so we basically beg him to sit down and let us suck him up, and when we do that he just becomes a mess, he ends up thrusting into our mouth while whining

You were desperate, you had saw photos of Lando on your timeline and how hot he looked and now all you could think about is pushing him onto the bed and sucking him off until he saw stars.

“Baby I’m home” you heard a voice say, you didn’t even realise the time, he had been out on the track today and had an early morning so this was the first time you would see him. “Hey love” you said meeting him in the kitchen, he had a tight fitting shirt showing off his abs. “I missed you today” you complained “I missed you too but I’m here now” he replied “Saw you showing off on twitter today looking all hot, made me horny” you complained “Sorry love” he kissed your mouth, before moving down to your neck thank god you wore a oversized top today.

He unbutton your jeans but before he could get any further you stopped him “please let me suck you off, all I’ve been thinking about all day please” you didn’t care how desperate you sounded you were desperate “Please sit down let me pleasure you for once” you very rarely got to give him head he would always been the one to pleasure you, he was never a selfish lover.

“I’m never going to say no” he unbuttoned his own jeans pushing them down to his ankles before sitting down on the seat, you had never done anything in the kitchen before thank god you spent the day cleaning it.

You got down on your knees and you pulled down his pants and took out his dick before you started stroking him, he was always hard “I can’t wait to put your cock I’m my mouth” after a couple seconds you felt he was ready, you licked the tip first licking his pre cum, moaning while doing so.

“Fuck we should have done this sooner” you complained. You took as much of him as you could in your mouth, playing with his balls. Lando was a moaning mess, he was so use to being the one giving head, he forgot how much he liked receiving it.

You could tell he was desperate, grabbing your hair and putting it into a ponytail gripping on it. “Fuck you take me so good pretty girl” he moaned out. “As much as I love it if git to fuck your mouth you would like that would you?” He asked already knowing your answer, you just nodded too focused on sucking him off.

He kept a hold of your hair and held you in place so he could thrust into your mouth “Fucking hell baby” he moaned, you had never been so turned on before, you wish you did this earlier.

“Look how pretty and desperate my girl looks” he said all matching with his thrusts. You couldn’t care how desperate you looked you were, you had been thinking about it for so long, he went too deep at times making you gag over his length.

“I’m gonna cum” he moaned out “where do you want it? Tits? Or mouth” he asked letting you reply “mouth” before he thrusted back into your mouth.

He cummed right in your mouth, slowing down his movements, talking about how good you did and how you would definitely do that again soon. “You taste so good baby” you moaned, trying to give him a kiss “no kisses till you brush your teeth I don’t want to taste myself” he complained, instead of fighting it you got up brushed your teeth and even used mouthwash before making your way back over to him to give him a big kiss.

—

Sorry it’s a short one trying to get my requests out I’m struggling a bit

Tag list @ur-fave-ave @nickxcorpse @may7460 @babyprofessorsharkpalace @kennysimp101

[withleeknow]

i think you'll do well with requests bc they seem to be popular in the fanfic side of tumblr! but even if it doesn't take off that quick, at least that'll be less overwhelming bc some ppl can be so demanding....anyways, i hope the best for you in this new journey haha 💝

me personally, i'm not very creative so i'll leave the details to the professionals (aka you) but i'd like to req something from minho's pov. i think those type of stories are SEVERELY lacking in the lee know fics department lol 🥲 it could be a childhood friends to lovers where he is pining for oc but he has a lot of self esteem issues and thinks she's not interested in him. also a big softie and just all around head over heels for her. you can add your magic! (if this is even remotely interesting enough to write lol i just want a minho pov tbh shsjjfjdjdj 😭)

light years.

summary: three times minho bites his tongue, and one time you don't let him.

pairing: minho x f!reader genre/warnings: childhood friends to lovers, fluff, angst; kissing, cursing, so much pining i could hurl. could this have been more edited? oh absolutely lmao but i actually don't hate it sooo this is what we're going with :p word count: 4.2k note: to the first anon, thank you so much for your kind words! :') and i'm sorry that this took me longer than expected. i was trying to figure out what i wanted to write for your prompt but then i got the second request with the song and i thought they would go nicely together hehehehe i hope the both of you enjoy thissss

as always, i’d appreciate any thoughts or comments you may have, and please drop a like and/or reblog if you enjoy reading ♡

navigation / request masterlist / ko-fi

I'm not sure what it means to love But I blink kind of slow around you I'm not sure what it means to love But I'll grow wherever you do What that means, I don't have a clue

I'm Not Sure - Margeaux Beylier

One.

Minho is 18 years old, and he doesn't know what love is, doesn't really care for it at all.

While his friends are out there wrapped in the clutches of young love - the kind that blooms with stolen glances in classrooms and sticky notes passed in secrecy, Minho finds it simply unnecessary. He doesn't understand it whenever Hyunjin whines about not having a girlfriend because they're still young, they've got all the time in the world for romance later down the line. It's not the end of the world like Hyunjin laments it is.

Minho has his own life to prioritize. College is starting after the summer and he still needs to figure out how he's going to cope with the absence of his cats once he moves away. He's got dancing and he's got his other hobbies to keep him fulfilled and occupied.

And above all, he's got you.

You're getting ready for your sister's wedding when it happens for the first time. Or rather, when it doesn't happen.

You step back into the room where Minho is waiting for you on the sofa, his gaze resting idly on the screen of his phone, scrolling absentmindedly through his friends' group chat even though he has no interest in whatever they're talking about. You cough lightly to indicate your return after disappearing into the bathroom minutes prior to change into your dress. He looks up upon your soft announcement, and when his eyes settle on you, he swears it feels like an invisible force has collided with his chest and knocked all of the air from his lungs.

Throughout all his years of knowing you, inseparable from childhood until now, Minho has never seen you like this - all dolled up with your hair falling over your collarbones, cascading over your shoulders in soft waves that beckons him to run his fingers through. The light blue dress hugs you beautifully, the silky material catching the light from outside the window every time you shift on your feet under his steady gaze.

"So...?" you ask, moving your arms awkwardly behind your back like you're not sure what to do with them. "What do you think?"

What does he think?

Minho thinks you might just be the prettiest girl in the world. He thinks he must have been an idiot his whole life, to have spent most of his waking hours beside you and not once has he noticed how truly breathtaking you are. He thinks about the feeling that spreads in the pit of his stomach, sends warmth throughout his body and makes his heartbeat race a million miles an hours.

Your best friend blinks slowly as he savors the warmth that he's never experienced before. It's similar to the feeling you get when you're sitting under the shade of a big tree on a summer's day. It's comparable to the satisfied tranquility you get after you've just finished a hearty meal. A little hazy in your contentment.

It's not until you probe with a pointed Well? that Minho realizes he's been staring at you in silence for a few minutes now. He swallows thickly, willing away the words that he wants to say but they get lodged in his throat. He reckons it's weird to verbalize them, because it's not how the two of you function. You don't often utter that kind of sentiment out loud and he doesn't either. Never have and likely never will.

In the end, he bites his tongue. "You look presentable," is what he settles on.

You roll your eyes, then reward him with a laugh.

Minho doesn't care about love. He only cares about you.

Two.

Minho is 21 years old, and he's gotten used to his heart beating erratically whenever he's in your presence.

Three years flew by in the blink of an eye, and graduation is just around the corner. You've always done well in school, straight A student with a track record that most could only dream to have. You put in the hours, you do the work. You deserve everything that you've achieved.

But it's been a challenging few months for you both, being seniors and all. He's had to watch you struggle to stay on top of your classes while also having to slave over a thesis 24/7 until you were sure it was perfect. It reduced you to tears a few times, and Minho was there to hold your hand through it all.

He held you in his comforting embrace when you wanted to give up. He made you dinner when you were too immersed in your schoolwork to notice that you'd forgotten to eat. He was your biggest support system; if it weren't for him, you don't know if you would've made it through.

It's hot outside today, a little unbearable but not uncharacteristic for June. Minho waits in a familiar hallway, the same hall that he's walked past for hundreds of times over the past few years, the same hall that he won't see again once he holds a degree in his hands in only a few weeks' time.

As he sits on an old wooden bench, he bounces his leg as if he's one of the people in the classrooms that line the hall. He doesn't have to be on campus today, but here he is regardless because you're scheduled for your thesis defense this morning. You're in one of those rooms, probably also bouncing your leg from the overwhelming nerves. Minutes feel like hours; you went in there a while ago after he had sent you off with a pat on the head and an encouraging Godspeed.

He's nervous for you, but he's sure that you'll do great. Years of hard work accumulating in what must be the most important moment of your academic journey. You even stayed up all night last night, refusing to sleep a wink just to revise your arguments and talking points.

Minho's head snaps up instantly as he hears a door creak open, the sound of it reverberating throughout the empty hallway like a gong announcing your return from battle. It takes you a few seconds to step out of the room and into his line of sight. He can't see you very well with all this distance between you, but he can still make out the way your frame is visibly shaking with every step you take. He rises to his feet, and you break into a sprint.

He opens his arms wide - a hug of consolation or congratulations, he doesn't know yet - but he still can't seem to brace himself for the collision. You run straight into his embrace, your warms wounding around his middle tightly. Minho feels your tremors, hears your sniffles from where you're pressing your cheek against his shoulder.

"How did it go?" he asks gently.

You start crying then, and he doesn't know if the tears that his shirt is soaking up are those of joy or of grief, but he holds you through it anyway. He swears he can feel every single beat of your heart, hammering so wildly as you're pressed against him like you could sink into him if only you'd push just a little bit more.

"I passed," you say in between sobs. "I got an A."

Minho heaves out the breath that he's been holding ever since you entered that classroom, but it's not like he had any doubt about it to begin with. He hugs you tighter than he's ever had before, and he loves you just the same.

You two must look so dramatic, all wrapped up together in your own little bubble, but who the fuck cares? Although, when another student passes by and coughs, you do break away from him, a little embarrassed for a second.

Even with your hair all mussed up and your flushed cheeks stained with tears, he still thinks you look the same as you did when you were 18 at your sister's wedding. The prettiest girl in the world.

Minho wipes away the wetness on your face with his sleeves, then swipes with gentle thumbs at the moisture that's gathered along your lash lines.

"Holy fucking shit," you breathe out, your shoulders sagging with evident relief, so much more relaxed now that you've done it. "I can't believe it's finally over."

Your best friend can't entirely agree, because he's always believed in you. He's had faith in you since the beginning, since you were mere children laughing and crying together on the playground. You were meant to do great things, this was always crystal clear to Minho.

I love you, he thinks as he smooths a hand over your hair, his chest swelling with nothing but pride and fondness for you. You did so well.

But it's not what he ends up telling you. He swallows it down, washes it away with a dose of regret and longing. He's still not the type to express sappy sentiments, and he's grown accustomed to adoring you only in secret.

"Let's go," he says softly. "I'll buy you dinner."

Minho is still young, he's still got his whole life ahead of him, but he knows what love is now. He knows that it's you.

Three.

Minho is 24 years old, and he finds it hard to make peace with the fact that you're starting to get out there, that you're finally going on dates now that academics aren't taking up most of your time anymore.

To be fair, none of the guys you've seen have been graced with a second date, and Minho thanks his lucky stars whenever you return from a night out and text him a simple Not it. He knows that it wasn't your decision in the first place, that your mom and your sister have been setting you up on blind dates because they want to see you bring a boyfriend home.

You complain about it all the time, whining about how you're not interested but your family is adamant on it. Minho is well aware, and yet, there's a part of him that's a little shaken, because what if? What if the universe miscalculates and the stars misalign just enough in his misfortune for you to cross paths with someone who's absolutely perfect for you? Someone who's a good man that can give you what you've always deserved to have.

He really doesn't know what he would do if that happens. When it happens?

He doesn't know why you're here tonight either, sitting on a chair on the other side of his kitchen island in a pretty dress when you're supposed to be going on a date in half an hour. The guy apparently works for a big record label, some producer that your sister knows through a friend of a friend.

You look indifferent, kind of bored, as you watch Minho makes dinner for himself. "You seem miserable," he comments, taking a quick break from chopping vegetables to glance up at you. You do look a bit miserable, but you're still the most beautiful in his eyes.

You throw your head back and groan loudly, "Because I am. God, I don't know why they keep making me do this. These guys always give nothing."

"Please elaborate."

"They're all boring suits with tedious routines." you say, and as absentminded as your tone is, it sounds a little pointed to Minho's ears. "They don't make me laugh."

Do they not make you laugh, or do they not make you laugh more than I can?

"Then don't go," he snickers, though there's no humor in his voice at all. "These guys sound like duds. Just tell your sister to fuck off."

"Do you mean that? Do you really think I shouldn't go?"

And there's something in your gaze, something so suddenly expectant in the way you're looking at him that makes Minho wonder. If he says yes, would you listen? Would you stay here with him? Would you stay here for him?

I'm serious. Don't go. You can have this and I'll make myself ramyeon. Just be here with me.

You both stare at each other on either side of his kitchen island for an infinite stretch of time. He feels like your eyes are trying to tell him something that he can't decipher, as if they're sending him signals in a language that he never learned how to read.

For a second there, he indulges himself. He pretends that you're only asking because you want to hear him say it. That you want him to put up a fight and not let you go.

But he bites his tongue because it's become a bad habit. A habit that he can't shake because he simply doesn't have the courage to do so. Because if you stay here tonight, looking like that under the cozy lighting of his living room, he might just spill his secrets and he wouldn't be able to take it when reality comes crashing down and you end up telling him that you've never felt the same way.

"I'm kidding," he musters up the words, and tries to plaster on a smile for your sake, even though he's not sure if you really believe it. "You're dressed up anyway. Go and get a free fancy dinner, if anything."

Minho knows what love is, but his love has always lived in the shadows, his longing has only existed in the dark that it terrifies him just thinking about it meeting the light.

Four.

Minho is 26 years old, and he's been a coward for the better part of a decade.

Maybe he's loved you for even longer, but he has spent the past eight years head over heels in love with you, and not once has he done anything about it. Never been able to gather enough courage to ask you out, never even hinted at his feelings for you. He loves you from his place by your side and yet, you've never known.

He loves you the most, but he loves you in the worst way that a person can love another - he loves you in silence.

You're the prettiest girl in the world, and Lee Minho is a pathetic coward.

All these years, he's kept quiet and for what? There's always a spot reserved for him right next to you and yet, it feels like he can only watch you from the sidelines, far away from where it really matters, because he doesn't think he can fit into your life the way he truly wants. You taught him what love was, and love, to Minho, is unattainable. Something he can spend the rest of his life yearning for but won't ever have.

Love hurts. Sometimes, all love does is hurt.

"I would've taken you to a nice restaurant if you asked, you know," he says, putting a chocolate cupcake on the coffee table in front of you before he sits down next to you on the fluffy carpet of your living room. He pulls out a candle next, placing it right in the center of the sweet treat.

Your gaze follows his hand has he lights the candle, your eyes glinting with excitement as though you're a child again and your favorite day of the year is still your birthday. The tiny flame curves and bends, dancing to a rhythm that looks like only you can hear. You watch the candle like it's magic, while Minho just watches you, thinking the same thing.

He watches as you close your eyes and clasp your hands together for the theatrics, then you blow out the flame seconds later with a swift breath.

You turn to him with a smile, "I don't need a nice restaurant. This is perfect."

He blinks, and there's that warmth simmering in his belly again. He first felt it when he was 18, and he feels it now. He feels it almost every moment that he spends with you, and he reckons it's only reasonable, because you're his home personified and love can still be beautiful even when it hurts. There's his heart racing again, but that's nothing new to Minho.

He muses over your words. Perfect. Just one simple word is enough to get his hopes up in a way that it really shouldn't.

Your definition of a birthday well spent is in your cozy apartment, eating takeout pizza with your best friend. Perfect, to you, is him baking you a singular chocolate cupcake upon your request and being with him within these four walls, where his fingers occasionally brush yours when you sit next to each other.

Oh, Minho would follow you to the ends of the earth if you asked him to.

He clears his throat lightly, breaking away from your gaze that's full of gratitude and childlike wonder. "What did you wish for?"

"I'm not gonna tell you. It won't come true then."

Wishes don't come true anyway, he thinks, but obviously he won't say it out loud to you, and on your birthday no less. Instead, he diverts his attention to the cupcake, subconsciously tonguing his cheek as he takes a small chunk of the sweet and offers it to you.

You let him feed you even though your eyes are narrowed. "What was that look?" you ask.

"What look?"

"You had a look."

"No, I didn't," Minho insists.

"Yes, you did. You wanted to say something, didn't you?"

He shrugs, popping a piece of cupcake into his own mouth. The answer is yes, he did want to say something, but if you want to get technical about it, then he's wanted to say something for years now. He asks you the same thing every birthday, What did you wish for?, and you would refuse to tell him every time.

"Wishes don't come true," he verbalizes it this time, with a voice that's lighthearted on purpose despite knowing that you wouldn't take it that seriously either way.

You roll your eyes. "Now you're just being pessimistic."

"What? I'm speaking from experience."

"You've never had a birthday wish come true?"

"My birthday wishes haven't come true since I was 18."

Minho feels your eyes on the side of his face, and when you remain quiet for a beat too long, he turns his attention back to you. "What?"

"How do you know they didn't come true?"

"Because..."

Because you've been my wish for almost a decade now. I didn't use to believe in wishes but I always believed in you. Every year, I wish for you to look at me the way I look at you, but it never comes true. Every year, I wish that you would love me back, not just as a friend, but you never do. You are my wish, but you're also the very reason why I know wishes don't come true.

Then he's laughing, but nothing is remotely funny about this. It's your birthday and suddenly all he can think about is how much it stings to be reminded that you're the only thing he'll ever wish for, and still, maybe this simple wish is absurd enough that the universe will never grant him what he truly wants.

"Never mind," he says. "This whole thing is silly."

There he goes, biting his tongue again. Coward.

"No, what were you going to say?"

"You're so bossy today," Minho pretends to complain.

"It's my birthday. Tell me," you press on, and suddenly he can't find any appreciation for your stubbornness that he's adored all his life. You keep your eyes fixed on him when all he wants to do is hide from you.

What is he supposed to say to you? What can he even say? That he's spent more than a third of his life hopelessly enamored with you? That the second he utters any of this out loud, he knows it will be the end of your friendship?

And Minho can't afford to lose you. Even if it hurts, he would rather let love hurt than live in the absence of you.

"Eat your cupcake," he says instead. "I'll get some ice cream."

He makes a move to get up, and the bad habit further cements its place in his subconscious. He's always running away from you when you're supposed to be the person he can be the most open with. This is how he knows he doesn't deserve you.

But you reach for his wrist and it makes him still, the feeling of your hand sliding downward to hold onto his fingers. He's used to the feeling of your smaller hand in his, used to how he can hear his heartbeat in his ears whenever you lace your fingers together.

What he isn't accustomed to, is the look on your face this very second, akin to the one you wore two years ago as you sat on the other side of his kitchen island, asking him if you should go.

Expectant and hopeful; you're holding something back too.

The words that slip from your lips are ones that he never imagined you would say to him.

"I've waited for you long enough."

His poor excuse of retrieving ice cream is all but forgotten as he stares at you, doe-eyed and despairingly confused. "What is that supposed to mean?"

You take a breath, and Minho wonders if this is how he looked every time he wanted to say something only to back down in the end.

Then it all comes rushing out.

"For a while, I thought there might've been something between us, something more than just friendship. I don't know why I thought that, I just had a feeling. On the day of our graduation, I thought you would finally kiss me or at least say something, but you didn't. Whenever I went on dates, I wanted you to tell me not to go, that I was wasting my time with those guys that couldn't make me laugh because they weren't you. You never said anything, you never did anything. I waited every birthday just like I waited tonight. You're still holding it over me and I'm starting to wonder if you really love me too or if I imagined everything this whole time."

Your voice gets smaller toward the end, almost as if the uncertainty takes over you the longer he remains silent. He doesn't have the words for it, doesn't really have the mental capacity to process all of what you just professed. Years and years of longing, of hoping that you would come running into his arms the same way you did on the morning of your thesis defense, and it turns out that you were always the one waiting for him to reach you.

If you really love me too.

Your fingers start to loosen around his but Minho doesn't let you get away, not now and not ever again. Not when he finally knows that he's burnt up enough of your time just because he was too stuck in his head to see that you were holding a hand out for him all along.

He pulls you into his orbit and he likes to imagine that somewhere out there in the infinite universe, two stars collide when he kisses you for the first time, long overdue but still heavenly nonetheless.

He's crying but you don't seem to mind the tears. You're kissing him back and it's really all that matters. He can't think straight but he adores you to the point that his lungs ache.

"I love you," he mumbles against your lips. The sentiment comes out clumsy, half coherent but wholeheartedly sincere. "I'm sorry. I love you, I love you, fuck, I love you."

You're the one who breaks the kiss first, with your hand on his chest gently pushing him away. Panic instantly shoots through him like a lightning strike. These are the words he's been holding back for years, did he not even say them right? Did he fuck things up yet again?

You brush the tears from his cheeks, your voice so impossibly soft when you ask, "Do you mean it?"

Minho splinters into a million pieces, of course he does.

Your name falls from his lips, sounding like a prayer, like the most tender plea that's ever been uttered, "I love you the most. I'm so in love with you that it hurts. I've been yours for so long and I never said anything. Fuck, I-I'm sorry. I love you so much. I'm sorry. I-"

You bring his face to yours once more, shushing him with a kiss that makes him putty in your hands. You tell him that it's okay, and you kiss him like you forgive him. The world could be ending right now, and he doesn't think that either of you would even care very much.

Because you're the only wish of his life, and you kiss him as though you want to make up for the lost years. Because Minho feels like he's 18 again and you're the most beautiful girl in the world, wearing a smile that leaves him breathless in the most wonderful way possible.

all rights reserved © withleeknow. reposting, translating and/or modifying is not permitted by any means. [posted 06.05.2024]

[sv5hive]

too little, too late. | lh44

pairing: lewis hamilton x fem!reader

content warning(s): angst, swearing, lewis is a bit of a dick in this sorry, unhappy ending because i love being miserable 🫶🏻

word count: 1,763

note: thank you so much for all the likes and reblogs on my first work a few days ago!! i didn't expect all the love so it is very, very appreciated :) this is a bit long so get comfy! and i also listened to you're losing me by taylor swift while writing so... yeah.

(psst! part 2 is here!)

(masterlist!)

memories from the night you two met flashed through your mind as you stood alone in the dim kitchen. the hangover from the next morning meant most of the night was a blur of shots, flashing lights and sweaty bodies but those deep brown eyes and endearing smile remained sharply in focus.

you stared at the two cold plates of dinner abandoned on the table and a bottle of wine nearing the end.

where had it all gone wrong?

six years.

six years of supporting him through everything.

and you loved being with lewis no matter what. seeing him in his element while racing was just as exciting for you as it was for him. but when would it end? you couldn't keep your life on pause forever.

back in 2017 when you first started dating you discussed a life of peace. a life with a big family and a nice house in england where your children could grow up normally like the both of you did. and you weren't foolish. you would never truly have peace when you were in a relationship with lewis hamilton, the face of formula 1. but you were willing to give up any sense of normality if it meant you could be with the love of your life.

or so you thought.

years passed as you watched all your friends get engaged and married, settle down and start their own families. at every bachelorette party, wedding reception, baby shower, family event you would be asked the same questions.

"when is he going to pop the question? you two have to get married! i bet he's planning to do it soon."

and every time you would have the same response.

"oh we're just taking it slow. he's pretty busy with racing and we both agreed that it wouldn't be fair for him to be away so much."

and you really did believe that at first.

either you didn't notice the stares of pity or you ignored them to convince yourself that everything was ok. it was only when you brought up the idea of finally having kids that you started doubting yourself.

"hey, lew. i've been thinking."

"hmm, yeah? what about." he replied absentmindedly, still searching netflix for a good movie to watch.

you passed him the bowl of popcorn to hold while you got under the blanket.

"i was thinking that we're finally ready to start a family."

he stilled. that was the last thing he thought you would bring up.

"lewis?"

"i want a family too, you know that. but i can't retire without getting that eighth championship. we're almost there. besides, i don't wanna leave you at home with a kid and not be there for every step of the way."

both of you knew at the rate mercedes was going, lewis would need a miracle and a half to win another title against red bull and their rocket ship.

he avoided your eyes and clearly thought that was the end of the matter so you accepted that when he was ready he would tell you. right?

you tossed and turned that night, unable to get the way he brushed off the topic so coldly out of your head. did you imagine it? that flicker of hesitance on his face? a pit of uneasiness settled at the bottom of your stomach as you desperately tried to reason with yourself. no. everything is fine. you had already waited a few years. what was a couple more?

so you tucked away your dreams of a family into the back of your mind for the time being and just enjoyed your relationship with lewis. every date felt like the first and you never wanted your love to end.

"lewis...this is too much!" as you stared in awe at the lone table in the middle of a completely empty restaurant.

rose petals led you two all the way from the entrance to a table with a single rose stood in a vase in the centre as candles flickered softly.

"for you? never."

staring at him in the golden light, you couldn't help but blush at his romantic gesture. he was making up for being away during a triple header and you hated to admit it but you could get used to this.

racing. you smiled at the thought of seeing lewis race. it was like seeing an artist produce a masterpiece every time pencil hit paper. he truly was an incredible sight to see.

you were there for each of his championships since 2017. you witnessed the joy of 2020 and the heartbreak of 2021. you were there, celebrating each win with him and consoling him after each loss, every time. you had fallen in love with the sport you once had no knowledge of just as hard as you had fallen for lewis. you knew how much of a toll each season took on him and you were always going to be there to pick him back up. his world became yours as you met his team and soon enough you were a familiar sight in the mercedes garage.

wasn't seven world championships enough for him?

you would never ask him to give up his career for you. and he would never ask that of you. but after years of waiting for the next step you couldn't help but wonder whether he still wanted that with you.

he was more than an hour late now. both of your schedules had been almost completely full for the past few months and you thought it would be nice to catch up over homemade dinner.

apparently he didn't think the same.

you hadn't bothered calling or texting. he always turned his phone off while at work anyways. as you finished off the last mouthful of wine the jingle of keys and the door unlocking brought you back out of your thoughts.

heavy footsteps trudged through the hallway.

"hey baby, i didn't think you would be up- what's all this?"

"dinner. i've been waiting for two hours now." you turned away from the counter to face him.

"shit. i am so sorry. i just got so caught up at work. we've been trying to improve the car to-"

"-to beat red bull. i know. i know."

"i promise i'll make it up to you. what about dinner next week? at that chinese restaurant you really like?" he walked towards you and went to wrap his arms around you before you pushed him away.

"stop, lewis. just stop. i can't keep doing this." you couldn't look him in the eyes.

a pin drop could be heard as lewis' blood ran cold.

"what?"

the change in atmosphere almost made you wish you had never said anything. almost.

"i can't keep waiting on you, lewis. i'm sorry."

"i said i would make it up to you." the look of pure confusion on his face would be amusing if it weren't for the fact that you were on the verge of tears.

"it's not just about dinner, lewis."

"then what is it about?"

"everything. god, we've been together for eight years and we're not even engaged and nowhere near starting a family. we have nothing to show for it. i knew i would have to wait and i was fine with that but i just can't anymore. this isn't what i imagined for us."

"so what? you're just going to leave? you know how i feel about having kids."

"and i get that, i do. but are you even planning on retiring in the near future? we're not getting any younger and i've been ready for a while now. i just don't think our ideas of our future are the same anymore."

"am i just meant to drop everything for you then? give it all up?"

"fuck, of course not, lewis. i would never ask you to do that. never. but sometimes it feels like you choose your career over me. and i know what it takes to be in formula 1 to win, i know you need to give it your full focus. i just, i need you to choose me for once. choose us."

"no, you don't know what it takes because if you did, you wouldn't be doing this to me right now. in the middle of the season."

you blinked. once. twice. you couldn't believe what you were hearing.

"are you fucking kidding me, lewis? i'm ending our six year relationship and you're thinking of how it's going to effect your season?"

"yes! fuck, this is my whole life. it always has been and it always will be."

there it is. confirmation from the man himself. you stumbled on your words trying to convey your anger as your blood continuously boiled at his miserable attempt to fix his mess.

"have you ever even thought about how i've felt all these years? giving every excuse in the book to our families and friends about why we haven't taken the next step in our relationship and defending you when they said i was too good for you? you may get to avoid them by going to the races but i don't have that privilege."

your throat was dry at this point as you gasped for air and still, he was stood almost unbothered at the fact you were hopelessly clinging onto the last remaining threads of your relationship, willing him to fight back.

"so that's it? you're not going to stop me?"

tears pooled at your eyes as you realised this was really happening.

"well clearly you've thought this out pretty well."

you didn't know whether to laugh, cry or throw the empty bottle of wine at his head.

"you are fucking unbelievable, lewis. i thought this meant something to you but clearly not."

you stormed towards the door and opened it. you paused while silently hoping he would beg you to stay. hoping he would risk everything for you.

but it never came.

you wiped away your tears and tried to at least sound somewhat assertive despite your voice wavering.

"let me know when you're not at home and i'll come get my things."

you slammed the door shut with a resounding bang and walked away from the place and person you had called home for so long.

he sighed and rubbed his face with his hand. as he moved to get a beer out of the fridge his gaze fell on the calendar stuck to the front. there was a red heart around today's date with "anniversary!" written in your handwriting.

fuck.

note: yikes. i hope you aren't too sad because of me. any feedback is appreciated!! let me know what else you wanna see :)

[beanthesprout]

Something New

Bucky Barnes x fem reader

Summary: You and Bucky had been dating for awhile, but had agreed to take things slow as it had been a long time since he'd been in a relationship. One night, things get a little heated.

Warnings: grinding, cursing, cunnilingus

Sorry if it's not very good lol, my first time writing smut

You were snuggled up together in his bed, your laptop balanced in his lap playing a movie. But you weren't paying attention to the movie.

All you could think about was Bucky. His eyes, his jawline, his hair, his arms, everything. You adored that man so much.

You looked up at his face, he was relaxed, focused on the movie. His thumb stroking your shoulder absently.

"Buck." You whispered.

"Hm?" He looked down at you.

Your eyes were pleading, "Can I kiss you?"

He smiled softly before leaning in to press a kiss to your lips, you reached a hand up to cup his face and kissed him back. Bucky deepened the kiss, nipping at your bottom lip.

You outright whined when his tongue slipped into your mouth, which made him groan. His metal hand moving to rest on your thigh.

The kiss got heated fast, and the next thing you knew, Bucky had pulled you up onto his lap so you were straddling him. You felt a tinge of excitement at this new position. You two had made out before, but not like this. You just hoped it wasn't too fast for him.

His fingers slipped under your shirt, brushing where the waistband of your pajama shorts met skin. The difference between warm fingers and cool metal sent shivers up your spine.

You twined your fingers through his hair, giving it a small tug, which made him let out a small moan. You felt heat begin to pool in your underwear.

Bucky was such a quiet person, so you loved that he made little noises when the two of you were kissing, like the very touch of you drove him crazy. But you'd never heard him actually moan. It made you want to hear it again.

You gently rolled your hips into his, he paused and pulled back.

"Shit Bucky I'm sorry was that too much?"

"Do that again." He commanded.

"What?"

"Do it again." His hands had come to rest on your hips.

Experimentally, you ground against him again. A little harder this time. Bucky sucked in a breath.

"Do you want me to keep going?" You asked quietly. Bucky nodded.

So you rolled your hips against him again. Grinding against him, drawing out moans not only from you but from him as well.

Moments later he was rolling his own hips into you, clothed cock grinding against you in all the right ways. Curses began to fall from your lips. Mumbles of how good it felt like blessings to his ears.

You dropped your head to hide in his shoulder.

"No. No I want to see you," he growled out, "I want to see the face you make."

So slowly you lifted your head back up locking eyes with him as you ground against him again.

"Fuck." He whispered.

He leaned forward, his mouth attacking your neck, determined to leave marks on you. You'd been moaning his name, Bucky, this entire time. But when his mouth hit that one sensitive little spot, you couldn't stop yourself.

"James." You gasped out.

His fingers dug into your hips, dragging you down, making you grind against him harder.

"Keep saying my name like that baby."

And so you did. You gasped and moaned his name over and over as the coil in your belly grew too tight until suddenly, you snapped. You cried out, trembling against him as he kept dragging you over his crotch until you were done. And then he let out a loud moan, lifting his hips into you a few more times before stilling.

"Shit Bucky." You panted.

He lifted his face from your neck, also panting lightly.

"We're doing that again. Soon."

You nodded in agreement, shifting and wincing at the mess you'd made of yourself. Bucky likely wasn't very comfortable either.

You lifted yourself off of him, noticing the large wet spot on his crotch.

"I'm gonna go clean myself up." You chuckled, starting to slide off the bed.

His arm shot out to grab yours, "Or you could let me do it." There was a nervous smile on his face.

"You sure? I don't want to do too much too fast."

"I'm sure."

"Ok."

He got up, gently pushing you back down on the bed before kneeling between your thighs. His fingers rested on the waistband of your shorts.

"It's been awhile doll, so forgive me if I'm not very good."

With one pull he took off your shorts and underwear, dropping them on the floor and staring at your heat.

He licked your thighs first, cleaning off the slick that'd made its way on them earlier. Biting and sucking along his way, leaving purple marks all over.

You were propped up on your elbows, watching him closely, heart pounding.

He glanced up at you when he came to your pussy before licking a stripe up your folds. You gasped.

His mouth came to rest over your clit and he began to suck, his tongue coming to swipe over it. You moaned loudly, your thighs trembling.

He moved, tongue swiping through your folds before slowly pushing into you. You gripped the sheets, praises and curses spilling from your lips.

He groaned when you said his name again, the vibrations delicious. He began to tongue fuck you, delving in as deep as he could before pulling out again and then pushing right back in. His thumb coming up to rub circles on your clit.

You panted, hips desperately grinding against his face as he worked.

He was already pushing you so close to the edge.

"M close James. So close. Please. Please." You cried out.

Bucky moved faster, trying to drive you off the edge. It wasnt very long before you snapped, cum covering Bucky's face.

He pulled back, licking his lips. His cheeks and chin were covered in your slick.

"Seems like you just made an even bigger mess." You grinned, still coming down from your high. He wiped his face on his tshirt

"Fraid so doll." He grinned back before moving to kneel over you and press a kiss to your lips. You could taste yourself on him.

"Stay here." He murmured when he pulled back, and left the room to return with a wet washcloth, wiping you up.

The two of you changed clothes before you went back to Bucky's room and snuggled up together to watch another movie.

"I love you." He said as he kissed your head.

"I love you too Buck." You replied, snuggling closer into his side.

He smiled before hitting play on the movie.

[minisugakoobies]

Paradise | JJK - Fifteen

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader

Genre: smut, neighbors to lovers (not quite friends but not quite strangers), slow burn, love triangle, Stripper!AU

Rating: M (18+)

Warnings: we finally get a JinKook showdown in the most ridiculous way possible, the tiniest bit of angst, CONFESSIONS!!, followed by post-confession sex, JK hits it raw, OC in lingerie, fingering, oral sex (f receiving), lots of talking about feelings, I'm sorry but this gets a little soft because I love these two

Word Count: 6.3k

Disclaimers: NSFW, obviously I don’t own BTS - they just inspire me

Summary: That sexy man on stage - the one currently giving your friend the lap dance of her LIFE - is your super shy neighbor, Jeon Jungkook?!

A/N: We're back and we're nearing the end! Thank you to everyone who has been waiting patiently for the next chapter - I didn't mean for it to take so long, but, well, life 🤷‍♀️ Anyway, I'm very excited to share this chapter with you finally - I hope you enjoy!

Unbeta’d as usual. Please don’t be a silent reader, I’d love to hear from you!  💕

Previous Chapter ♦️ Paradise Masterlist

Despite his words earlier, Jungkook is in fact one of the first people on the dance floor when it opens. And of course, you’re right there with him. How could you say no when he holds his hand out and smiles at you like that - like nothing else would make him happier right now than you in his arms?

After all the time you’ve spent admiring Jungkook’s moves when he dances for you, it’s a whole new perspective to get to experience them when you’re dancing with him. Part of that difference is due to the deejay keeping it wholesome with the song selections, since Jennie and Yoongi’s family members are the majority of the revelers surrounding you. So there’s a lot less grinding and a lot more distance between the two of you.

You don’t really try to keep up with him - it’s not that you’re a terrible dancer, it’s just that he’s so fucking good. His every movement is so natural, like he’s not even trying. He does show off just a little bit, when Jisoo eggs him on, slipping into a freakishly accurate robot that has a small ring of guests gathering around to cheer him on. The giant grin on his face tells you he’s enjoying the attention just as much as the faint blush on the tips of his ears tells you he’s just a little bashful about it. 

After a few songs, the music finally slows a little, the crowd thinning as only couples are left. Jungkook draws you close, one arm sliding around your back as the other clasps your hand, holding it to his chest. The room around you falls away as he takes the lead, swaying with you around the floor.

“Are you having a good time, jagi?” he murmurs after a moment. 

“I am, Kookie.” Lifting your head from his shoulder, you gaze into his eyes, feeling that familiar warmth overtake you when he returns your smile. “Thanks for coming with me today.”

“Like I’d turn down the chance for free food and drinks,” he teases, laughing when you huff and try to pull away, tightening his grip to keep you locked in place. “What? I’m just being honest.” 

“Ass,” you mutter, but you can’t stop smiling, and neither can he. He lifts his arm, hand pressing lightly on your back to guide you in a spin, then brings you back into his embrace. You spot Rosé across the room, watching you and Jungkook dance, and she politely claps as you shake your head, grinning. 

The beat picks up again, and your friends surround you and Jungkook. Rosé, Jisoo, and Jin all dance together as Lisa introduces Yi-Jeong to the group. Even Jennie and Yoongi join in, and it’s true what Jennie told you yesterday - her man definitely has moves. Everyone’s happy and laughing, and you’re so full of joy you could just burst.

Jin suddenly twirls, facing Jungkook with an intense look on his face. The younger man takes a step back in surprise as Jin starts to rock his body back and forth, like he’s about to bust out a breakdance move. Is he seriously about to - 

“Ooh, dance battle!” Jisoo cups her hands around her mouth, yelling. Your other friends start whooping, forming a circle around Jungkook and Jin. Jisoo pulls you next to her from where you’ve been standing, so you’re not between them anymore. “Get it, Bambi!” 

While the others around you are shouting encouragement, you just gaze silently between the two men, unsure if you should be joining in. Unsure if this is a friendly competition or if the tense vibes you feel radiating between them is something more. From the expressions on their faces, it’s clear that they’re going to do this, so you just sigh, bobbing along to the beat, waiting for the show. 

Jungkook stops gawking at Jin and begins bedrocking, swinging his hands as he faces Jin with a fierce look. Jin glares back, sticking his arms out as he undulates in a rather impressive wave, rolling his long limbs from left to right. 

It’s not until you hear clapping behind you that you realize that more people have joined the circle, crowding in behind you, shouting Jin’s name. Jungkook hears it too, his brow furrowing slightly. It’s clear his competitive nature’s kicked in when he peels his suit jacket off. You hold your hand out for it automatically, feeling a swoop of heat in your stomach as he gives it to you with a wink. 

The tip of his tongue slips out as Jungkook suddenly throws himself towards the ground, landing on one hand like he’s doing a handstand, and then kicks his legs out in a cartwheel kick. He’s so smooth with it, inverting himself like it’s nothing, that you actually gasp.

It’s like he cranked the volume up on the crowd, and someone - Rosé, maybe? - starts chanting Jungkook’s name. You can’t help but add your voice to the mix. 

Jungkook lands back on his feet and motions for Jin to go. Jin also takes his jacket off, jaw clenching firmly. He rolls his body a few times before bouncing into the Roger Rabbit, feet stepping quickly, arms flapping at his side like wings. It’s surprisingly loose and funky, two words you don’t typically associate with Jin. 

Lisa yells, “Go chef!” and the crowd divides itself into two chants. Jin ends his turn with a little flourish, dusting imaginary dirt from his broad shoulders. But you know from Jungkook’s smirk that he’s undaunted, and without a second’s hesitation, he swiftly dives to the floor, launching himself into a windmill.

Your friends explode into cheers, watching Jungkook roll round and round the floor. As he picks up speed, he tucks his arms up onto his stomach, doing the trick with no hands. Then he comes to a stop with a freeze, legs hanging in the air. 

The crowd chants Jungkook’s name only as he rises to his feet. He straightens his tie, then gestures to Jin. Jin rocks for a few beats, a strange look in his eye. 

Then he throws his hands out in front of him, holding one steady while the other mimics winding a reel. 

“Is he - is he fishing for Jungkook?” 

You don’t answer Rosé as there’s no need to. Jin’s clearly doing the fishing pole move. One by one, the voices around you grow quieter. Jungkook blinks at Jin for a few seconds, obviously thrown by this decision.

Then he grins, flapping his hands by his face like fins.

“Oh, wow, they share a brain cell,” Lisa says. “Did not see that coming.” 

Jisoo groans. “Well, this is anticlimactic. I was promised bloodshed.” 

“Who promised you that?” you ask, laughing. Feeling a tiny bit relieved. 

The crowd departs, but the two men keep dancing. Jungkook pretends he’s been hooked, thrashing from side-to-side before dropping to the ground in his signature dolphin kick. Always a performer to the end, you think, as he hops back to his feet, and he and Jin take turns bowing to one another. 

The smile on his face gets wider when Jungkook sees you clapping for him. He reaches for his jacket, and you impulsively press a kiss to his cheek, biting back a laugh as his eyes widen slightly.

“If those are the moves you pull out for a dance-off, I can’t wait to see what you’ve got planned for later,” you whisper. Jungkook’s arm grips your side as he tilts his head to look at you. His touch is warm, but it can’t match the heat in his eyes. 

“Careful what you ask for, jagiya,” he replies, gaze dropping to your mouth so briefly that you almost miss it. “I need some water. Do you want anything?” 

You shake your head, and he disappears towards the tables. As soon as he’s gone, you feel someone brush your arm. 

“Okay, I’ll give it to the kid - he’s got moves,” Jin declares, holding his hand out in an offer to dance. You silently take it, letting him pull you close as the deejay cues up a ballad. 

Jin’s quiet for a few beats, leading you in small circles around the dance floor. It strikes you that this is the first time the two of you have really been face-to-face since yesterday, that weird standoff in the hallway earlier notwithstanding. You haven’t had a chance to talk to him alone since - 

“So what’s up with your boy?” 

You meet Jin’s gaze with a raised eyebrow. “Jungkook? What do you mean?”

Jin shrugs, the movement jostling your hand where it rests on his shoulder. “I mean, he looked like he was ready to throw hands when he introduced himself earlier. Like he was just itching for a fight.” 

“And you’re not?” You snort when he blinks in exaggerated confusion. “Oh, come on, all those snide little comments you were making at the table? Arguing with him about who has it worse? What was that all about?” 

Jin maintains his affronted expression for half a minute longer before he starts to laugh. “Okay, fine, I admit I was just pushing his buttons at dinner. In my defense, he made it too easy!” He laughs harder when you roll your eyes and start to pull away. “Okay, okay, I’m sorry. But I had to do something to cheer myself up. It wasn’t easy for me to sit there and watch the two of you together, to see the way you look at him.” 

Your curiosity tampers down your annoyance for a moment. “How do I look at him?” 

Jin smiles, but it doesn’t reach his eyes. “Like there’s no one else in the world.” 

You glance away, unsure what to say to that. Your gaze flits around the room until it lands on Jungkook, finding him at one of the tables, chatting with Lisa and Yi-jeong. His nose crinkles as he laughs with your friend, tattooed hand coming up to swipe away the hair that falls into his face, and you hear Jin sigh. 

“Yeah, that’s the look,” he says, shaking his head. He shifts his arm from your back, leading you into a gentle spin. “I was honestly surprised at how easy it was to antagonize him. Figured nothing I could do or say would bother him, knowing he won your heart.”

When you don’t respond to that, staring at Jin’s bowtie instead of meeting his eye, he hums. 

“Oh, I see. You haven’t told him yet.” 

Without warning, Jin dips you. You gasp, clutching his bicep to steady yourself.

“Are you having second thoughts?” he murmurs. His hand grips yours tightly, arm cradles your back, keeping you in place while his face hovers a mere breath above yours. 

It’s an intimate pose, the way he holds you now, yet just like yesterday, you feel nothing.

“No. No second thoughts.” You’ve recovered from your momentary shock, voice steady as you reply. “I’m sorry, Jin, but like I told you yesterday, it’s Jungkook I want.” 

Immediately, you’re back on your feet. 

“Yeah, I didn’t think so.” Jin grins a crooked grin. “Had to ask, though.” 

You roll your eyes. “I’m starting to regret this whole ‘let’s be friends’ idea.” 

He ignores your jibe. “Can I ask you a serious question?” 

You take a moment to study his face before answering. All traces of humor have vanished as he waits for your response. Slowly, you nod. 

“What are you waiting for?” 

The rooftop garden glows softly in the night air, lit by tiny lights strung along the trees and flowering plants. Hidden speakers strewn around the open space bring the music from the reception outside, providing a gentle soundtrack for a beautiful summer evening. 

“Where are we going?” Jungkook asks, hand clasped firmly in yours as you lead him out of the reception and across the garden. 

In the corner of the roof, there’s a small nook carved out between two potted cherry blossoms, their branches obscuring the two of you from any of the other guests milling about. Right now, you need a little privacy.

You also need a moment to gather your thoughts. Your stomach’s jumped into your throat at the thought of what you’re about to do, and your anxiousness makes it hard to think straight. It doesn’t help that you’re slightly distracted by the sight in front of you. 

Although the sun’s long since set, the air is still warm. Jungkook’s shed his jacket, has his tie loosened, sleeves rolled to his elbows, hand still in yours as he looks at you expectantly, patiently waiting for you to speak. You can see the moon reflecting in his bright eyes, and for a moment, you’re back in the elevator at your apartment, staring at your handsome neighbor, that shy man with the sweet smile.

It wasn’t that long ago that he was a total stranger. Someone you saw occasionally at the mailboxes, someone who regularly ran away when you tried to talk to him. You didn’t know anything about him back then - what he did, what he liked, what made him laugh. What his kisses felt like. 

It wasn’t that long ago, yet it already feels like a distant memory. One that you never want to return to. Knowing everything you know about him now, feeling everything you feel - you can’t go back. There’s only one thing you need to do now - tell him. 

No reason to wait a second longer. 

Taking a deep breath, you squeeze his hand. “Jungkook, I brought you out here because I wanted to tell you something. I’m… ah, I’m not very good at this kind of thing, but I’m gonna try because I don’t want to drag this out when I don’t need to.” 

Jungkook’s eyebrows twitch slightly, but he doesn’t say anything, so you go on. 

“You know how I went to Jennie’s yesterday? Um, Jin was also there, with Yoongi. He pulled me aside and told me that the job Wendy asked me to interview for is actually his show for Nosh. And then he started talking about the two of us working together and traveling and -”

“Choose me, jagiya.” 

“Huh?” 

His interruption throws you off from the rambly mess you were attempting to say. Jungkook reaches for your other hand, holding both against his chest, and gives you a shaky smile. 

“Choose me, jagi. I know I don’t have a career like Seokjin does, or his money, or - or even a guarantee that I’ll ever have either of those things. I probably can’t promise you most of the things he can.” He pauses to draw a long breath, like he’s trying to slow himself down and not rush over his words, and oh, you want to kiss him so much right now. Even if this isn’t how it’s supposed to go. “But I can promise y-”

“No no!” It’s his turn to look surprised as you raise your hands to his mouth, muffling his speech. “Jungkook, stop! I was trying to tell you that I ended things with Jin yesterday. You don’t have to say another word because it’s over.” 

“Mmt’s omer?” he mumbles against your fingers, eyes widening. 

“Yes, it’s over,” you giggle, uncovering his mouth, and suddenly all of your nervousness floats away on the evening breeze. “Come on, Kookie. Don’t you know? I’ve already chosen. It’s you. It’s always been you.” 

Jungkook continues to stare at you with those big doe eyes as your words slowly sink in, and you can’t help but smile, fondly, so, so fondly, that familiar sensation of warmth surging up from your chest, and you know now that it has a name, that buzz, that elation, that euphoria, and it’s on the tip of your tongue, just waiting for you to breathe it to life. 

So you exhale. 

“I think I’m falling in love with you.” 

For just the slightest of moments - a fraction of a second, a single heartbeat - when he doesn’t do anything, doesn’t so much as blink or breathe, you’re scared you’ve said too much. It’s too soon, too fast, too everything. 

But then he wraps his arms around you, holding you close enough that you can feel his own heart thumping wildly within his chest, and puts your fears to rest with four simple words, whispered softly against your lips.  

“Jagi, I’ve already fallen.” 

He kisses you, soft and slow, every touch so full of tenderness that you could cry. You tangle your fingers in his hair, desperately seeking something to hold onto, to keep you from floating right off the roof. He’s fallen for you. Jungkook’s fallen for you. 

You never knew your heart could hold so much. 

All your nervousness from before has dissipated. Now the only reason your pulse races is the nearness of him.

“Are you in any hurry to get back in there?” he asks, tipping his head towards the party.

You shake your head. 

He smiles. “Good.” 

He takes your hand again, locking his other arm around your back. You lay your head on his shoulder and close your eyes, listening to him sing along lightly with the music drifting across the rooftop. Even when the song changes to something more uptempo, he doesn’t let go, just laces his fingers through yours and continues to sway with you beneath the stars. 

Many songs later, when the two of you finally return to the party, you find that it’s already winding down. Jennie and Yoongi are making their rounds to say goodbye, needing to go home  and pack for their trip to Jeju Island in the morning. 

Jennie grabs your arm and pulls you away from Jungkook, waving the other bridesmaids over. “I’m gonna do it tonight!” 

Jisoo pinches her cheek. “Babe, you’ve already done it. That’s why you’re late, remember?” 

“Ha, ha.” Jennie smacks her hand away. “I mean I’m gonna tell Yoongi I’m pregnant, smartass.” 

“Ah, I’m so excited for you!” Lisa gives her a hug, and then you’re all hugging. 

“Have you all had a good time tonight?” Jennie asks, not waiting for an answer. “This has been the most amazing day! Thank you for everything, I couldn’t have done this without you.” 

“Yes, you could have,” you grin. 

“Okay, true, I could have. But it wouldn’t have been as much fun without you all. I love you so much!” 

“We love you too. Now go celebrate with your husband!” Rosé giggles, emphasizing the last word with an energetic wiggle of her eyebrows. 

“Yeah, get out of here. Some of us have plans tonight but we can’t leave until you do.” Jisoo declares. 

“She makes a good point,” Lisa chimes in, glancing over her shoulder at where Yi-jeong sits alone, clearly waiting. 

“Wow, okay,” Jennie laughs, but she’s flying too high to really be mad. “I’ll see you all in a week!” 

It’s as you turn to walk back to Jungkook that you remember. 

“Oh! Lisa!” 

Your friend glances at you as you back away with a giant grin. 

“Pay Rosé her fifty bucks.” 

“Why are your friends screaming like that?” Jungkook asks when you rejoin him. 

You just smile and press a soft kiss to his cheek. “Ready to get out of here?” 

Riding Jungkook’s motorcycle is a much more pleasant experience tonight than it was on your way home from your first date. The sky is clear above you as Jungkook expertly weaves through traffic, and you’re warm and dry sitting behind him, wearing his suit jacket, arms tight around his waist. You spend most of the ride hugging more than holding on to him. 

Every few blocks, he releases the hand grip to let his palm rest on your thigh for a moment, squeezing gently. You think he means it as a reassuring touch, knowing how shaky you are with the entire concept of motorcycles to begin with, how just the thought of riding one still makes you nervous, but the actual effect he's having on you is far from comforting. It’s driving you insane.

By the time you reach your apartment door, you’re feral with need. You toss Jungkook’s jacket onto the floor and Jungkook lets out a surprised yelp when you tug on his arm as he’s closing the door. He barely has a chance to turn the lock before you’re pulling him down, passionately kissing away his confused noise. 

“B-baby,” he finally manages to stammer out after a few minutes of intense making out, “baby, do you wanna move to the couch?” 

You shake your head. “Need you now.” 

“Yeah?” His eyes are so dark that it makes you shudder when he catches your gaze. “Always so needy for me, huh? Just like the first time?” 

You remember that night, the way he’d fucked you against the hallway wall, both of you too desperate to even make it another ten feet to your bed. That same greedy desire burns through you now. 

Thank god for the slit in your dress. Hitching your leg up, you wrap it around his back, guiding him back down on top of you. 

“Just like that,” your voice trembles, back arching as Junghook’s hand snakes between you, rubbing at you through your dress. “Ahh, fuck, just like that!” 

You grasp at the side zipper on the dress, fingers fumbling too much to yank it down as quickly as you want. Jungkook has to do it for you, helping you sit up long enough to shed the entire gown. 

He sucks in a sharp breath. “Jagi.” 

If you weren’t already dying for him, the expression on his face when he sees you in the lingerie you’re wearing beneath your dress would do it. 

“Does it look better in person?” you ask, running your fingers over your chest, thumbs pressing in slow circles to wake your nipples, feeling them swell beneath the lace. 

With a pained groan, Jungkook starts hurriedly tearing at his suit, throwing the items nearly halfway across the open space of your living room in his urgency, not stopping until he’s completely naked, cock already hardening between his legs. 

“Yeah,” he grunts, biting his lip to let his hands do the talking. They travel over your torso, up across your breasts, squeezing your hands so you grip yourself harder. He laughs at your little gasp, and then he’s swallowing your sounds with his eager mouth, knocking your legs apart with his knee so he can press his body to yours. 

Your own impatience has you hooking your calves the backs of his thighs, bending your knees to urge him nearer. But no matter how close he is to you, it’s not enough, an itch you can’t scratch no matter how much you try. 

“I think this is going to have to come off now,” you frown, tugging at your bodice. You need to feel him, skin-to-skin. 

“Oh, not yet,” Jungkook says, voice near enough to be a growl. “Please, jagi, keep it on a little longer. For me.” He looks at you with such a lustful gaze that you find yourself nodding, immediately caving to his wish. If he wants to fuck you in your lingerie, fine. There will be more time to feel him later. 

There will be more time for everything you want with Jungkook. 

His mouth reconnects with yours. You sigh into him as his fingers find the snaps at the crotch of the teddy. He’s not gentle with them, practically ripping them open, but he’s more delicate as he slides his finger into you, finding you just as wet as always. He plunges two fingers in, and you know he’s trying to take his time and make sure you’re ready, but you’re too impatient for his consideration right now. 

“Come on, Kookie,” you plead, cupping his chin to draw his gaze away from his work, “I’m ready. I need you now.” 

“Shit,” he mutters, clearly reading your frustration. “Are you sure?”

“Yeah. I wanna feel you.” 

He reaches for his pants, which have been flung over the back of the couch, and you stop him.

“No, I mean, I want to feel you.”

Jungkook swallows hard, his Adam’s apple visibly bobbing. “Jesus Christ, jagiya, you’re going to kill me.” He kisses you again, before his expression turns serious. “Can we? I mean, are you on something -” 

Laughing, you grab his face again, pulling him back to you for another kiss. 

“I have an implant. And I haven’t been with anyone since you and I have been…” you trail off, unsure what to call it. Dating? “Not since the last time I was tested.” 

“No one?” He doesn’t say the name, but you know what he’s asking. 

“No one.” You and Seokjin never got that far.

“I haven’t been with anyone either.” Jungkook strokes his thumb along your cheek. “It’s just been you. You’re the only one I want.” 

“Then have me.” With another sigh, you lift your hips, rolling against him. 

Jungkook groans, and you barely have a second to breathe before his lips take yours again. There’s some shifting, you spreading your legs while he’s propping himself up on one elbow and lining himself up with his other hand, and then he’s sinking in, slowly, filling you up hot inch by hot inch, until he’s completely sheathed. 

You got your wish. You can feel all of him. It’s a new sensation, and it’s intense, but you can tell it’s even more so for him. 

“Oh, goddamn, jagi.” Jungkook presses his forehead to yours. His chest heaves as he holds himself completely still. “You’re so - fuck.” 

“Yeah? Is it that good?” 

He nods a little, eyes squeezing shut, and you run your fingers through his hair, trying to impart some comfort. As much as you want him to rail you through the floor right now, you don’t want to rush him anymore. 

“Does it really feel that different?”

Jungkook shakes his head. “It’s not that. That’s part of it - you feel so fucking good, baby - but it’s - it’s…” He huffs out a short breath, shaking his head again. “I don’t know how to say it. It’s everything.” 

And you understand exactly what he means, not by whatever he’s trying and failing to say, but by the look in his eyes. 

“Oh,” is all you can say, feeling your own words slipping away from you, as he starts to move. 

His cock drags slowly, so slowly at first, his head bowing as he concentrates on the feeling of you, the way your cunt seems to suck him back in eagerly, walls clenching when he snaps his hips experimentally. He observes every breath that escapes you, every mewl and whimper, and adjusts his pace, the strength of his thrusts, all the while drowning in his own perception, the tight heat and wetness of your core making his eyes roll back in his head with each pump. 

Neither of you speak after that, but you don’t need to. Your bodies communicate everything you’re feeling, punctuated by the unrestrained noises you both make. Your nails rake down Jungkook’s back as he fucks into you, drawing whine after whine from him, broken cries of desire, of wanting you to hold him, claim him, just as he’s claiming you. Mine, your fingernails declare, inscribing his skin with scratches. Yours, his hips answer in return, powerfully driving into yours, connecting you again and again, faster and faster. 

His hand clutches at the thigh you’ve wrapped around his waist, fingers twisting around the garter straps, and you can tell from his unsteady panting that he’s close. Your own pleasure is nearing the precipice, but you know he’s going to reach his first. Which he confirms with a strangled whimper.

“Jagi, I’m - I’m gonna come,” he grits through his teeth, brow furrowed, like he’s focusing all his energy on not coming right then and there. “‘M sorry, I can’t stop, I can’t - “

“Don’t stop, Kookie, don’t stop!” You don’t care if he finishes first. This isn’t about just sex anymore. All you want is for him to feel as good as he makes you feel, all the time. “Come on, cum inside me. Give me everything, fill me up!” 

“Fuck!” he grunts, moaning your name, and with only a few more thrusts, he follows your command. His hips jerk wildly as he gives in to the burning need beneath his skin and fills you with his hot release. It seems to go on and on, until he’s gasping, sagging against you weakly, too wrung out to hold himself up any longer. “Holy shit.”

You just hum, stroking his sweat-soaked hair, until he finally lifts his head. 

“I’m sorry,” he says. “I got caught up in the moment. Too much going on in my head and - and, fuck, you felt too good.” He gives you a sheepish smile.

You shush his apologies with a laugh, wrapping your arms around him again, urging him to lay down, so his head rests on your chest. “You don’t have to explain. It’s been… it’s been a long time since I’ve felt anything like this.” 

He sighs, moving slightly so he can leave light kisses over your covered chest. “Me too.” His hand trails lazily down your torso, following the swirls in the lace’s pattern. “I’m glad you said what you did. On the roof. I wanted to tell you before how I felt, but I was afraid you’d think I was rushing things.” His voice gets quieter. “It wouldn’t be the first time.” 

There’s a sadness in his tone, a naked vulnerability that makes your heart ache, so you squeeze him a little tighter. You know exactly what he means. 

He raises his head a little, starts kissing his way down your stomach. “Are you still…”

“Am I still what?” You bite your lip as he reaches the apex of your thighs, gently nudging them further apart so he can lie in between. 

Jungkook presses soft kisses to your inner thighs, one side, then the other, before he looks up at you. “Was that enough for you or are you still wanting more? You were so needy earlier, jagiya.” 

Of course you still want more. You don’t think you’ll ever get enough of him. 

“Yeah,” you say, your fingers combing his hair out of his face so there’s nothing hiding him from you, just as there’s nothing hiding you from him, “I want more. Please, Kookie.” 

The smirk that spreads across his lovestruck face sends your heart racing. Your back arches off the floor when he coaxes the first orgasm from you with his tongue, feels like it might snap in half by the time he pulls the second one with his fingers. 

You melt into his embrace afterward, so thoroughly satiated, so utterly content, that you nearly fall asleep. But Jungkook coaxes you off the floor and into the bathroom, to wash his back in the shower before he tenderly scrubs yours, and then into bed, where the last thing you see before closing your eyes is the smile on his face as he whispers good night. 

“What does this one mean?” 

It’s late. Very late, sometime between midnight and early morning, when you should be asleep. You’d awoken in need of some water, slipping out carefully, trying not to wake Jungkook, only to come back to find him up and waiting for you to return to bed. He wasn’t just awake but up up, and you couldn’t resist, climbing directly into his lap for a slow, lazy ride. 

Now, you’re lying together, back pressed to Jungkook’s chest, with his arm draped beneath your breasts, as he gives you a tour of his tattoos. He tells you that most are symbolic, but a few have stories behind them, and you listen raptly to each one. Even though he’s probably tired, he’s indulging you, answering all your questions without so much as a single yawn.

He tilts his head to look at where you’re tapping on a striped snake. “That one? That’s supposed to represent growth. You know, shedding my skin, like a snake.” He flexes his forearm and the snake moves as if undulating on its own. “Do you like snakes?” 

“I like them a lot more than spiders, I can tell you that,” you reply, giggling. 

He laughs, watching silently as your fingers roam over his skin. There’s so much ink covering him, and you’re dying to know about all of it, filled with a buzzing curiosity despite the late hour. 

“What about this one?” Gingerly, you trace over the orange tiger lily etched onto the inside of his forearm, as if afraid that pressing too harshly will cause the petals to crumple. It’s gorgeously vibrant, the glowing color popping vividly against his skin. 

“Ah, that’s my birth flower.” Jungkook laughs a quick laugh. “That one was actually Taehyung’s suggestion. Do you know what the flower is supposed to represent?” 

“Uh-uh.” 

“Self-confidence.” He laughs again, shaking you a little as his chest vibrates. “He said it’d be a good reminder when he’s not around, that I still need to be confident.”

“Taehyung’s a good friend,” you remark, and Jungkook hums in assent. He rubs mindlessly at the flower with his other hand, fingertips bumping against yours. 

“You know, there’s another reason I got this one. A hidden meaning that tiger lilies are meant to express.” 

“Ooh, a hidden meaning?” You tilt your head to peer at him. “And what’s that?” 

Even in the dim light from your bedside lamp, you can see the tips of Jungkook’s ears turning red as he smiles bashfully, his eyes crinkling when he answers. “Please love me.” 

It’s impossible to resist kissing him, kissing that shy bunny smile that you’ve adored all this time, so you don’t even try, cupping his cheeks gently while you brush his lips with yours. When you pull away, his face is flushed, and he laughs, dipping his head in embarrassment even as he whispers, “Keep going.” 

You giggle, and kiss him again, and then stop. “Oh! Wait a minute.” 

Jungkook lets out a small grunt of displeasure when you leave his embrace, but you return quickly, handing him a small frame from your desk. 

“Jagi, you framed this?” He stares through the glass at the tiger lily sketch he’d drawn for you, back when he asked you out on your first date.

“Well, yeah. It was too pretty not to.” 

You take your place between his legs again, his arm automatically sliding around your waist while he gazes at the picture. “But it was just a quick little drawing. It’s not my best work.” 

“So? I think it’s beautiful. And… it’s from you.” You can feel your neck warming as you speak. “I like to keep it on my desk when I’m working. Every time I get annoyed by something, I look at it, and it calms me down.” Your lips quirk in a little smile. “So you can imagine that I look at it a lot,” you say, half-joking, half-not. Because it’s true, you do stare at it a lot. The drawing always brings you peace. Because it reminds you of Jungkook. So fiery and bright, but also so lovely and delicate. 

“Jagi,” Jungkook says again, swallowing thickly. His arm squeezes you closer.

You take the frame from his hand, placing it on the nightstand, before shifting to face him, legs straddling his as you loop your arms around his neck. “Be honest - were you sending me a hidden message with this?” 

His ears are burning red again. “Maybe. Guess it worked.” 

You surge forward, kissing the cheeky smile right off his face. His hands settle on your hips, holding you tightly, as if right now there’s any danger of you leaving. There’s nowhere else you’d rather be, with no one else. 

But you’re also wondering something you’ve been wondering for a while now, and since he’s been so obliging so far, you decide to ask him one more question. “Can I ask you something?”

“Jagi, all you’ve been doing is asking me questions,” Jungkook grins. 

You roll your eyes at his teasing tone. “Yeah, okay, I just mean, can I ask about something that doesn’t have anything to do with your tattoos?” 

He nods. 

“If I hadn’t come to Paradise with my friends that night, would you ever have made a move?”

He clearly wasn’t expecting that question, judging by the look on his face. His eyes fall out of focus as they stare unseeing at you, and you know he’s lost in thought. You give him the time to find his way to an answer, running your fingers through his hair soothingly while you wait.

“I don’t know,” he finally admits. “I’d like to think that yes, I would’ve gotten up the nerve to talk to you. But it might’ve taken a while. Seeing you at Paradise kind of gave me an opening.”

“I think this still would’ve happened,” you tell him, suddenly filled with an unusual amount of confidence, bolstered by his hands on your waist, his eyes locked on yours, “all of this. I think we would’ve ended up just like this.” 

“How do you know that?”

“I would’ve worn you down at the mailboxes,” you grin. “At the rate we were going, it probably would’ve taken a decade, but we’d get there eventually.” 

He laughs, hands locking behind your back as he holds you close. “Or maybe I would’ve shown up at your door one night and danced for you. Maybe that’s what I did in another universe.” 

“I’m sure it worked,” you murmur, leaning closer to his lips. “I think in any universe, we end up like this. We’re just lucky that we got here so fast.” 

“The luckiest,” he agrees, closing the space between you. 

When you finally fall asleep again, you dream of falling through other universes, following the same dark eyes and wicked smirk through each.

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© 2021-22-23-24 by sunshinerainbowsbts/minisugakoobies. Crossposted to AO3. Please do not copy or repost.

[wingedtyger]

How to Buy a Computer for Cheaper

Buy refurbished. And I'm going to show you how, and, in general, how to buy a better computer than you currently have. I'm fairly tech-knowledgeable, but not an expert. But this is how I've bought my last three computers for personal use and business (graphics). I'm writing this for people who barely know computers. If you have a techie friend or family member, having them help can do a lot for the stress of buying a new computer.

There are three numbers you want to know from your current computer: hard drive size, RAM, and processor speed (slightly less important, unless you're doing gaming or 3d rendering or something else like that)

We're going to assume you use Windows, because if you use Apple I can't help, sorry.

First is hard drive. This is how much space you have to put files. This is in bytes. These days all hard drives are in gigabytes or terabytes (1000 gigabytes = 1 terabyte). To get your hard drive size, open Windows Explorer, go to This PC (or My Computer if you have a really old OS).

To get more details, you can right-click on the drive. and open Properties. But now you know your hard drive size, 237 GB in this case. (this is rather small, but that's okay for this laptop). If you're planning on storing a lot of videos, big photos, have a lot of applications, etc, you want MINIMUM 500 GB. You can always have external drives as well.

While you've got this open, right-click on This PC (or My Computer). This'll give you a lot of information that can be useful if you're trying to get tech support.

I've underlined in red the two key things. Processor: it can help to know the whole bit (or at least the Intel i# bit) just so you don't buy one that's a bunch older, but processor models are confusing and beyond me. The absolutely important bit is the speed, in gigahertz (GHz). Bigger is faster. The processor speed is how fast your computer can run. In this case the processor is 2.60 GHz, which is just fine for most things.

The other bit is RAM. This is "random-access memory" aka memory, which is easy to confuse for, like how much space you have. No. RAM is basically how fast your computer can open stuff. This laptop has 16 GB RAM. Make sure you note that this is the RAM, because it and the hard drive use the same units.

If you're mostly writing, use spreadsheets, watching streaming, or doing light graphics work 16 GB is fine. If you have a lot of things open at a time or gaming or doing 3d modeling or digital art, get at least 32 GB or it's gonna lag a lot.

In general, if you find your current laptop slow, you want a new one with more RAM and a processor that's at least slightly faster. If you're getting a new computer to use new software, look at the system requirements and exceed them.

I'll show you an example of that. Let's say I wanted to start doing digital art on this computer, using ClipStudio Paint. Generally the easiest way to find the requirements is to search for 'program name system' in your search engine of choice. You can click around their website if you want, but just searching is a lot faster.

That gives me this page

(Clip Studio does not have very heavy requirements).

Under Computer Specs it tells you the processor types and your RAM requirements. You're basically going to be good for the processor, no matter what. That 2 GB minimum of memory is, again, the RAM.

Storage space is how much space on your hard drive it needs.

Actually for comparison, let's look at the current Photoshop requirements.

Photoshop wants LOTS of speed and space, greedy bastard that it is. (The Graphics card bit is somewhat beyond my expertise, sorry)

But now you have your three numbers: hard drive space, RAM (memory) and processor (CPU). Now we're going to find a computer that's better and cheaper than buying new!

We're going to buy ~refurbished~

A refurbished computer is one that was used and then returned and fixed up to sell again. It may have wear on the keyboard or case, but everything inside (aside from the battery) should be like new. (The battery may hold less charge.) A good dealer will note condition. And refurbished means any flaws in the hardware will be fixed. They have gone through individual quality control that new products don't usually.

I've bought four computers refurbished and only had one dud (Windows kept crashing during set-up). The dud has been returned and we're waiting for the new one.

You can buy refurbished computers from the manufacturers (Lenovo, Dell, Apple, etc) or from online computer stores (Best Buy and my favorite Newegg). You want to buy from a reputable store because they'll have warranties offered and a good return policy.

I'm going to show you how to find a refurbished computer on Newegg.

You're going to go to Newegg.com, you're gonna go to computer systems in their menu, and you're gonna find refurbished

Then, down the side there's a ton of checkboxes where you can select your specifications. If there's a brand you prefer, select that (I like Lenovos A LOT - they last a long time and have very few problems, in my experience. Yes, this is a recommendation).

Put in your memory (RAM), put in your hard drive, put in your CPU speed (processor), and any other preferences like monitor size or which version of Windows you want (I don't want Windows 11 any time soon). I generally just do RAM and hard drive and manually check the CPU, but that's a personal preference. Then hit apply and it'll filter down.

I'm going to say right now, if you are getting a laptop and you can afford to get a SSD, do it. SSD is a solid-state drive, vs a normal hard drive (HDD, hard disk-drive). They're less prone to breaking down and they're faster. But they're also more expensive.

Anyway, we have our filtered list of possible laptops. Now what?

Well, now comes the annoying part. Every model of computer can be different - it can have a better or worse display, it can have a crappy keyboard, or whatever. So you find a computer that looks okay, and you then look for reviews.

Here's our first row of results

Let's take a look at the Lenovo, because I like Lenovos and I loathe Dells (they're... fine...). That Thinkpad T460S is the part to Google (search for 'Lenovo Thinkpad T460s reviews'). Good websites that I trust include PCMag, LaptopMag.com, and Notebookcheck.com (which is VERY techie about displays). But every reviewer will probably be getting one with different specs than the thing you're looking at.

Here are key things that will be the same across all of them: keyboard (is it comfortable, etc), battery life, how good is the trackpad/nub mouse (nub mice are immensely superior to trackpads imho), weight, how many and what kind of ports does it have (for USB, an external monitor, etc). Monitors can vary depending on the specs, so you'll have to compare those. Mostly you're making sure it doesn't completely suck.

Let's go back to Newegg and look at the specs of that Lenovo. Newegg makes it easy, with tabs for whatever the seller wants to say, the specs, reviews, and Q&A (which is usually empty).

This is the start of the specs. This is actually a lesser model than the laptop we were getting the specs for. It's okay. What I don't like is that the seller gives very little other info, for example on condition. Here's a Dell with much better information - condition and warranty info.

One thing you'll want to do on Newegg is check the seller's reviews. Like on eBay or Etsy, you have to use some judgement. If you worry about that, going to the manufacturer's online outlet in a safer bet, but you won't quite get as good of deals. But they're still pretty damn good as this random computer on Lenovo's outlet shows.

Okay, so I think I've covered everything. I do recommend having a techie friend either help or double check things if you're not especially techie. But this can save you hundreds of dollars or allow you to get a better computer than you were thinking.

[nexysworld]

Chapter Summary: Leon wasn't sure what to do after your last encounter, he knew he messed up. He'd do anything to get you back to him, even if it meant more scheming under the guise of helping you get better. Pairing: Yandere!Leon x Fem!Reader Tags: NSFW, Dead Dove, Dubcon, Kidnapping, Stalking, Smut, Unprotected Sex, Pet Names, violence, gore, MDNI, masturbation, murder, slow burn. Psychological manipulation, abuse of power, etc. no use of y/n. WC: 6.5K

A/N: Thanks so much everyone for the support on this story. I'm sorry this update took forever, but we're back swinging and I've already started chapter 6. Hope you like it! (tag list at bottom :) )

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He was stunned, absolutely stunned. He expected you to warm up to him again, what he hadn’t expected was the way you were looking at him like that, how quickly you fell into his touch, his kiss. Your skin felt electric under his fingertips, your mouth heaven.

He had waited so long for this very moment that he lost control of himself – he knew this was too soon. Knew you needed to be coddled longer, doted on, cared for until you were finally his. But he couldn’t help it, the sadness in your soft voice, begging him to make you forget, to make you feel better. It was too much even for him. Countless years of government training down the drain the moment you pleaded for him. But then – then you’d scurried out like a startled rabbit, and he knew he fucked up. That was too much for you, especially after such an emotional day. It left him with only two choices now, to play another long game or to force you back to him. Sighing, Leon leaned back into his couch, cock now softened and brain clear. He ran a hand through his bangs, pushing them out of his face, the image of your sad expression burned into his retinas. If he was being honest with himself, he wasn’t sure he had the mental fortitude to play another long game, he needed you, and that outburst of emotion showcased how badly you needed him as well.

And speaking of said outburst, should he go to you now, try to offer comfort? Or is space what was best for you? He pondered on that thought for a few minutes, knowing the next move was crucial in making everything come together. He settled on not wanting to push you, but at least letting you know it was alright.

Lifting himself off his couch, Leon made the short journey from his apartment to your own, feed padding against the scratchy carpet of the hallway. He stopped just outside of your door, fist ready to knock when he heard your soft voice sobbing icing him to his core. Regardless of what was necessary, you being so sad never left him with a good feeling – it was like an ice pick slowly cracking at his heart every time he heard it. He pushed that feeling aside, focusing on the task at hand, knocking against the door. “Hey.” He said. “Hey, can I come in?” There was an unintelligible response from the otherside, a mix between a muffled sob and an attempt at coherent words. “Look, I’m not upset.” He called again through the door. 

When no clear response came, he tried the knob, unsurprised to find it unlocked. He twisted the brass, the door creaking open loudly as the sound of your upset became louder. He found you on the floor, slumped against the wall, not far from the door. Kneeling over you, he cupped your face in his hands. Your glassy eyes looked exhausted, face swollen, red, and tear stained – it didn’t bother him though as he held you there, locking his gaze with yours. “It’s alright.” He said assuringly. “S’not.” He watched you croak out from your puffy lips, gasping between tears to get some of the air back into your lungs. “It is.” He moved from kneeling, to sitting, coming completely down to your level. “I know things don’t seem that way right now. But it’s going to be alright – whatever happens.” “I can’t do this.” You exclaimed, clutching at his shirt, bunching the cotton fabric in your hands. He moved his own over yours, patting them gently against his chest. “Can’t do what?” He gave you a second to formulate a reply. “This!” You said, as if that would clear things up for him. “You…I can’t. I can’t keep doing this with you Lee. This isn’t right… things aren’t right. Maybe we should stop seeing each other entirely – I’m not stable. And I can’t keep using you to bail me out, or to alleviate my feelings. It’s not fair to you, and it leaves me feeling… god I can’t even describe it. I’m sorry.” 

Those were not the words he wanted to hear. He knew you were still emotionally delicate, but hadn’t he shown you time and time again that things were better with him? Right with him? He felt his knuckles twitch at your words, squeezing your hand a little tighter, but not tight enough to hurt you. He resisted the urge to snap, swallowing down the lump in his throat, trying to maintain a sense of steeled calm as you let it all out before him. ‘You don’t even know what you’re going on about, saying this shit to me while you cling to me for dear life? Oh baby…’’ He thought  to himself, trying to de-escalate his own brewing internal storm. 

His mouth twitched slightly before he relaxed again and smiled at you. “Hey, don’t say that.” Releasing his hold from your arms, he pushed closer to you, wrapping an arm around your back before pulling you into his lap, tightening you into a bear hug. He buried his nose in your hair for a moment, taking in your scent, just holding you there like he always does, before finally speaking again. “I’m a big boy. I can decide what’s fair for myself, you know? I’m here because I want to be.” He felt you relax into him as he stroked your back, running his hand up your shirt to make more skin to skin contact as he soothed you. 

“But I left you blue balling over a psychotic break. I’m hung up on someone who –” “It’s alright.” He said again. “ There’s worse things in the world than being blue balled, like knowing someone you care about is hurting.” He didn’t entertain your second point with a response, instead he kissed the top of your head. “Don’t worry about earlier, you were emotional, it wasn’t cool of me to let things go that far. You needed a distraction for sure, but not like that.” Leon leaned back a bit to run his fingers through your hair softly. “You’re too good to me.” You said softly, not moving from your spot, keeping buried into him. “I’m just as good as you deserve, baby.” He said with a soft chuckle.

“I’m still sorry.” Your voice was low, but more stable now, the quivering gone. He studied your face as you pulled away just enough to look up at him. “Would it help if I said I forgive you?” Leon, tucked a stray strand of hair behind your ear. “Maybe a little.” “Well then, I forgive you.”

You leaned back fully now, resting against the wall again. “Thank you. I feel like all I do lately is cry and lose my mind, you know?” “Sometimes that’s just what you need to do, until you process things.” “I don’t know what there is to process. No matter how much evidence slaps me in the face, a part of me just can’t let go of the idea that he was real….that he is real.” He didn’t answer immediately, not liking how this conversation was going at all. It seemed like a rollercoaster, one moment you were slowly inching towards where he wanted you to be, so close to being his, before torpedoing back to this fucking topic. It was infuriating to him, boiling rage bubbling just beneath his skin. ‘Just forget about him already, I’m right here!’ 

“You know I don’t have an answer for that.” He said flatly, hoping you didn’t pick up on his change in mood. He leaned back, resting on his hands as he thought. He didn’t want to have to go down this path either, but he felt you were leaving him no choice. “I think I know someone who could help.” The way you perked up immediately was adorable, that’s the type of reaction he would never grow tired of seeing. “Who?”

“A doctor I know through work. His name’s Anthony Birkin.” He’d had the man’s number on speed dial since the last incident. A familial connection of the late William Birkin, he’d been working as a psychiatrist handling those who were testers of experiments for neo-umbrella. Of course with enough cash, pretending to be a personal psychiatrist made a decent side-gig too, and a biased one at that. Though it was true Leon had met him via his work connections – you didn’t need to know the other details. It’s not like you’d even be able to understand the necessity of it anyway. “A doctor? Leon you know why I –” “Yeah, I know. It’s scary, you don’t want them to think you’re crazy or hold you there, right? That wouldn’t happen.” “How could you know that?” “Like I said, I know ‘em from work. I could pull a few strings, make sure that doesn’t happen. You’d be surprised how many politician’s kids are allowed outpatient treatment when they likely should’ve been committed…not saying you should be at all.” He backpedaled a little, realizing the way that came out. “I’m just saying, maybe it could help.” He studied your face, intently watching every muscle movement, the way you bit your lip in thought, trying to get a read on you. If you agreed, everything after would go so much smoother for the both of you. “Maybe.” It wasn’t the answer he was looking for, he wanted something definitive, something he could really work with. “Maybe?” “Yeah, I’ll think about it.” You said quietly, rubbing at your sore cried out eyes. “You’re probably right, I think I just need a little time…” Close, so close – then you had to go and ruin it. ‘What the hell does she mean she needs time?’ The disaster that was this conversation was almost making him wish he just stayed on his couch for the night, but he would never be so selfish as to not tend to his bunny. “Of course, take all the time you need!” 

An awkward silence washed over the pair, Leon didn’t avert his gaze, but dug his fingers into the rug as a way to relieve some sort of tension. Your eyes darted around the room, looking like they wanted to land anywhere but on him, just one more thing that added to his already soured mood. He let out an awkward cough to clear his throat before speaking again. “So uh,  are you going to sleep here tonight … alone?” “Yeah, I think so. I think it’s time I learn to be a little more self-sufficient.” “Alright, just call me if you need anything. Don’t worry about the time – or feel free to let yourself in.” He reached out to gently stroke your cheek again. “I mean it. Please don’t feel bad, I’m here for you.” “Thank you.”

He nodded, leaning forward and pressing a quick kiss to your forehead. He didn’t want to leave you alone at all, ever again. If he had it his way you’d be curled up in his bed already – or better yet miles away in your own little corner of the world together, free from all of this. Despite that, he wasn’t going to push his luck tonight. He pushed himself up and off the ground, stretching for a moment, letting his joints  pop and crack from the awkward way he had been sitting. He reached a hand out towards you, to help you off the ground, another pang of irritation swept through him at your mild reluctance.  “Come on, it would make me feel so much better if I could at least help you to bed. Your ankle is still hurt after all.”

Despite the lingering negative feelings, his heart still fluttered the moment your hand made contact with his and you let him pull you to your feet. He wrapped an arm around your back to help support you in the short trek to the bedroom. 

Once he made sure you were safely deposited on your bed, he lingered for a bit taking in the sight. The way you looked tucked into those covers, your slew of stuffed animals on the shelf, some scattered onto the bed. It was so very fitting for you and so much better than witnessing it through a small camera – like seeing an animal in its natural habitat for the first time. 

“Is everything alright?”

The soft sound of your voice pulled him back to the moment, ironic how he’d caught you staring so many times before but now it was his turn to be caught off guard for a change. “Oh yeah. Everything’s good.” “You’re staring?” Your face held more amusement and confusion than anything else. 

“Sorry, I just realized it’s the first time I’ve seen the inside of your room while you’re in it.” The words left his mouth on auto-pilot, escaping the filter that should have told him not to implicate himself. He hoped you hadn’t picked up on the specific words he used, but it was too late. “What?” “Nothing, just that it’s the first time I’ve seen your room, that's all.” “That’s now what you said.” “That's what I meant.” He added a short chuckle to the end of his words hoping you wouldn’t push the subject further. He walked over kissing your cheek. “Have a good night.” He made his way out of your room and apartment as fast as he could after that. 

Leon collapsed down into his own bed, heart pounding from the entirety of the interaction with you. It hadn’t gone well, and it left him reeling a little. Letting out a sigh, he opted to try and sleep it off, just hoping you’d reach out to him soon just like you always did. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In the days that past he kept a close eye on you like he always did – there wasn’t a place in the world you could be where Leon wasn’t close behind both physically and metaphorically. Even technically being there didn’t help that the remaining  gap between you two still felt like a chasm of despair within him. He couldn’t believe how much you stuck your guns about “needing space,” as he watched you waste away. Work. Home. Sleep. Rinse. Repeat. 

‘That’s not my bunny!’ He thought to himself, as you slumbered on your couch for another night. The fact you hadn’t even eaten dinner made him queasy, you weren’t taking care of yourself. You weren’t acting like yourself. All of this was wrong, so very wrong. Each time you twisted and called for him in your sleep, a nightmare reminding you of things you were better off forgetting, he wanted to go to you. None of this was right – this was exactly why you needed him, and he still couldn’t have you yet. 

Leon tried to check in a few times, his texts were spurned with simple one word answers, and his in-person meetings at the door were kept brief, so brief he wasn’t able to work in the soft touches that he was so used to. The feeling of your skin ghosted like a phantom pain on his fingertips. The sound of your voice a lingering whisper in the distance. 

He hated it. No mission or distraction was enough to help the overpowering and ever consuming thoughts he had of you, nothing could abate his need or his worries. Leon wasn’t sure what his limit was, but he knew you were close to it. All it would take is one more push for him to snap. 

Luckily for him, and his slowly diminishing psyche his phone finally buzzed. There you were, a matching picture to his,  hands tossed hip in the peace sign with your tongue stuck out making a silly face. It sent his heart soaring.

‘Hey are you up?’‘Of course :)’‘Can we talk?’

‘Always. When?’‘Now?’ He could hardly contain the excitement as he slammed the green button down, dialing your number. He felt giddy for the first time in a while, like all of the pent of feelings he was harboring faded away at the very notion of you wanting to speak with him.

“Leon, hey.” The sound of your voice was like raindrops on the window. “It’s been awhile. Everything alright?” He sat up from his couch, alert in case he needed to head over to you.

“Oh yeah, I was just thinking about everything.” There was some shuffling and movement on the other end before you finally continued. “I miss you, for one.” Those words alone set Leon’s heart rate skyrocketing. “I miss you too.” He replied, doing his best to keep his composure, not wanting to sound too giddy. “I’m glad.” Despite your words there was a slight mellowness to your voice he picked up on. “Are you sure everything is alright?” “No. No they’re not… listen could you put me in touch with that doctor you were talking about? I think, you were right, I really need to talk to someone.” “Yeah, yeah absolutely.” He confirmed, tilting the phone to a more comfortable position between his neck and ear. “I’ll give him a call today and put you in touch.” “Thank you Leon.” 

The conversation wasn’t everything he’d been hoping for, expecting at least a request for reconnection, but he’d take it. It was close enough to what his was pushing towards, and it reinvigorated  him to know that he was again inching closer and closer to having you right where you belonged – with him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Another call, another mission a world away. Leon wished he could’ve been there in person, wish he could’ve watched through the double sided mirror as you spoke with Dr. Birkin, seeing all those minute little facial expressions you always displayed. Watching how you reacted and responded to each question, hearing your voice crystal clear again instead of through the low speaker of a phone or a hidden microphone. 

As he sat on the bench outside some official’s office, he pulled his phone close to his face, turning up the volume, headphones already in. He watched on the small fingerprint smudged screen as best he could – the video feed black and white, hard to see in the sunlight. 

There you were in all your glory, relaxed back  on the little couch. The audio wasn’t as clear as the mics he had placed in your apartment, but he could still make out the conversation still. 

The good doctor sat across from you in his chair, notepad in hand. “Mhm. Mhm.” He nodded in reply to something you’d said. “So you say you’re having false memories of this … Derek? You said he was your long term boyfriend, until he passed away under mysterious circumstances?” Leon cringed at the name. “Yeah…yeah that’s right.” You said, a somber lilt to your voice. “I swear I remember everything. But it’s like he’s a ghost. I went to his job, his parent’s house. Everywhere I could think of just to prove he was real, and they all acted like I was insane.” Dr. Birkin scribbled a few more notes down. “These memories, how vivid are they? And are they continuous, for example do you have any large gaps in your recollection?” You readjusted in your seat, picking at the arm of the couch you were on. Leon could see your leg shift and bounce as you tried to decide how best to answer the questions. “Extremely vivid. I can remember his face, the smell of his cologne, his voice. I can remember the way the air smelt and the rain against my face the last time we took a road trip – I wanted to get out and take pictures when it started pouring.” Your face contorted into one of pain, grabbing a tissue from the box on the side table before dabbing it at the bottom of your eyes. Leon wished he could’ve been the one wiping them away again. “As for gaps… there’s none. I could tell you about every major holiday, every birthday, the first time I met his family. Our first date, our anniversary, I can tell you what I saw when he – I’m sorry. I can even tell you what happened when he –” Dr. Birkin leaned forward to put a hand on your shoulder. “When he what? Take your time, deep breaths.” “When he died.”

Dr. Birkin gave you a moment to collect yourself before continuing. “You had mentioned at the start you recalled witnessing his death. Can you tell me what you remember from that?” For a moment you looked like the wind was knocked out of you despite your spot on the couch. Leon wanted to keep watching, wanted to hear more, but like always the video feed cut to Hunnigan’s name ringing in to him. “You have the worst timing, you know that Ingy?” “Well you know my favorite part of the job is getting to hear your annoyed voice at the other end of the line.” She said with a laugh. “Anyway, we need to talk about details. We just received intel that –” The sound of her voice slowly drowned out for Leon, he found himself replying with the usual responses, only taking in the most important information being fed into his ear. He was more focused on wanting to get back to your session, desperate to know if there was any important detail he should know about. Desperate to see the outcome of everything, and of course to make sure Dr. Birkin was holding up his end of the deal.

The call continued and he tried to appease that inner anxiety and boredom by bouncing his leg rapidly and looking around, taking in the trees and the now cloudy sky. The smell of rain was in the air from the morning, and the shuffling of people nearby was a decent enough ambient noise that it helped keep him from being entirely on edge. “Yeah, yeah. Warehouse….later today…..yeah I hear you. I *am* listening.” He insisted through the little speaker on the phone. 

He wasn’t sure how long the call lasted but the moment Hunnigan’s voice quieted, he slammed the red end button as fast as he could before pulling up the video app again. “Come on….come on…” He said frustrated as the video feed took forever to load again. Finally, the small black and white view appeared on his screen again, you were sitting up on the couch, legs criss crossed as you blew your nose with another tissue. “Good work today.” Dr. Birkin said, setting his notebook down on the table next to him. “I know that was hard and a lot to go over in such a short time, but you did very well.” Leon watched you nod before speaking. “So uh….do I have a diagnosis or I guess, where do we go from here?” “We’ll talk more about that in our next session. A case like this is quite complicated, to say the least. I need to go over my notes and discuss with a colleague of mine before offering a diagnosis. I want to make sure you have the best and most accurate care.” Leon sighed as he cut the video feed, realizing he’d missed the rest of the session for the day. His watch buzzed indicating that he needed to get going, sighing he pushed himself up off the bench to make his way inside the giant white bricked building for what would be a boring meeting.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This mission had taken longer than usual, longer than Leon had wanted. What was supposed to have been just a two day warehouse stakeout wound up becoming an entirely new situation. A bio-disaster so big it could’ve rivaled Raccoon City. While nothing he hadn’t handled before, it left Leon exhausted as  he collapsed into the hotel room bed – despite the luxurious rooms provided to him by the D.S.O nothing was as restful as being at home in his own bed, and definitely not as restful as the nights he got to spend with you in his arms.

He checked the clock, it was only around 5pm, if his timing was right your next session with Dr. Birkin should have started already. Sitting up for a moment, he began to tug all his work gear off, leaving only his boxers and tshirt before settling back down one more time. He grabbed his phone again, opening up the video app and sure enough the feed was live again and to Leon’s delight, it was near the start of the session. “Thank you for coming again Miss. Please take a moment to relax and get comfortable. I know our last session was quite intense.” Dr. Birkin brushed some of the blonde hair away from his face and adjusted his too-big glasses against his nose before taking his seat. “At the end of the last session I told you I wanted to discuss with some colleagues before issuing a diagnosis. I was able to make a few calls over the past two days and I think I can say with certainty that I’ve reached a conclusion.” “Really?” You asked, looking up at the doctor, almost excited but still reserved. 

Dr. Birkin nodded before continuing. “I believe what you have is called False Memory Syndrome. It can be caused by a traumatic event – of course given the nature of your memories, we don’t quite know what the trigger was in this case yet. Regardless, we can still manage the symptoms.” He pulled a few papers out of the folder on the side table before handing them over to you. “These are some printouts with more information, if you want to check it out.” “Thank you.” You said quietly, quickly scanning over the information before tucking them into your bag. “What's the treatment like?” “Like most things with therapy and medication. But for something like this we also want to make sure you have a support system, someone you can trust, rely on. With conditions like this, some of the things you see or remember can seem so real, having someone who can tell you the truth can really help keep you focused.” “Right, that makes sense.” You looked to the side out the window, zoning out. The doctor spoke a bit more but you weren’t replying to anything. Leon’s brows furrowed watching it play out. ‘Bunny, come on now….’ “Miss? Miss, are you alright?” “Oh yeah, sorry. It’s just a lot to take in.” “I understand. Why don’t we move forward, let’s talk about some things that might help.” Readjusting on the couch, you sat up and nodded at the doctor. “Alright, I think that sounds good.” “I’m going to prescribe you something to help you sleep, it should also help with general anxiety.” He scribbled something on what looked like a tiny notepad before handing it over. “Now, I’d like to talk about your support system next. You mentioned before that you were having trouble with friends, but there was someone who you do connect with and trust, Mr. Kennedy?” “Yeah, Leon. He’s been a huge help. He’s kind and out of everyone doesn’t directly accuse me of being crazy, even though I know he probably thinks it too.” Leon’s heart burst with warm love as he heard you speak about him. “It’s good to have someone you can depend on. How much do you trust Leon?” You paused for a moment before smiling. “A lot. He’s never given me a reason to doubt him, and he’s always there for me. Like my own personal super man, you know?” “Would you trust him if he told you when something wasn’t true?” “Yeah, I think I would.” “Do you trust Leon to keep you safe, including safe from yourself?” “Definitely.” “And lastly, do you think he would be alright being your support system?”

There was another pause in response. ‘Come on baby, you know me. You know I would say yes. Come on . . .’ he repeated to himself as if it would speed up your reply. ‘Don’t disappoint me baby.’

“You know, I can almost guarantee he would say yes and do it. Even if he didn’t want to, because he’s just a nice person like that. The best person actually.” 

“That’s good, that’s very good. I’m glad to hear that. Not everyone comes in with someone who can support them like that. Next, we’re going to make a short list of rules to follow with Leon, just as a reminder or affirmation, to help keep you grounded.” He grabbed the notepad and pencil from the side table before handing it over to you. “It’s best if you write them as we go along.” “Ok, I’m down with that.”

“First – remember that Leon only wants to help you, he has good intentions. Second – let Leon ground you, what he’s saying is true. Three – it’s ok to lean on him as much as you need, in fact it’s encouraged. Four – he knows what’s best, listen to him.” “Alright, got it.” You said, penciling down each of the reminders. “But the last one…I mean, I understand the others, but he knows best? I was hoping to still be independent at least as much as I can. That one just feels… I’m not sure how to put it into words.” “I can understand the hesitation. Giving up control can be the hardest part of these conditions, but sometimes false memories can lead to irrational thinking, emotional decision making, etc. It’s important to have someone not only to ground you, but who can act as a caretaker when needed, a guardian even.” “Am I going to be giving up rights to him or is it just something I should keep in mind? I guess I’m just confused, it’s a lot to grapple with.” “Well, I was going to ask if you’d be comfortable signing some consent forms just in case anything ever has to happen. It would allow Mr. Kennedy the right to decision making – but realistically, it shouldn’t come to that. Any inpatient treatment or conservatorship is something I use as a last-ditch effort for my patients. I prefer to work with my patients towards having as much autonomy as possible, but having back ups will always be my recommendation.” Taking in that information, you let out a sigh. “Gotcha… alright. I think I can be ok with that, but I’ll need to think on it more..” “Of course, take your time. Once you’re ready, make sure both you and Mr. Kennedy sign the forms. For homework, I want you to practice repeating these to yourself each day. If you can, also repeat them to yourself when you’re unsure of something.” 

“Noted, Doc.” Leon was ecstatic, making a mental note to add a bonus to the good doctor’s salary for that session. Every moment of it got him his money’s worth, and sunk you further into his grasp, just where he needed you to be. ‘Such a good girl, baby.’ He cooed at you in his mind, lovingly looking at you through the small handheld screen. It was enough to help him sleep easily that night.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The return home from the mission was uneventful, same as it always was. He wrote his report on the flight back, gave his debriefing in front of some officials with Hunnigan at his side, and then he was off on his way back home. 

This time though, his lead foot was in action, slamming the jeep’s so fast it nearly squealed out of the D.S.O building as he barrelled down the highway, wind tossing his blonde locks back. All he wanted was to get home to you, see you face to face again after everything that happened. Were you alright? How were you doing after therapy? Leon had a million questions running through his head as he made that drive back.

The moment the jeep was parked, he hopped out of the side, not bothering with the door. Booking it to the elevator, he stood in the confined metal enclosure, squeezing the hand railing tightly with anticipation. He felt like a cat gearing up for a chase, he was antsy ready – and the moment the silver doors slid open he was off down the hallway, careful not to move too fast, not wanting the neighbors to hear him thudding down the hall. Leon checked the time on his watch twice as he stood outside your door, just to make sure before he knocked that you’d be there. Knuckles itching he beat his hand against the door. “Hold on!” Your voice on the other side of the door was soothing for him, especially after the past few days he’d spent apart from you. 

“Hey.” He said with a smile as the door opened revealing you there, pajama clad. You looked simply exhausted in a way Leon couldn’t quite understand. No bags under your eyes, or physical showcases of it, but something about you just screamed tired. “Hey Lee.” You replied softly, opening the door for him to step inside. One of the first times you’d done so in a long time – he could smell butter and garlic wafting through the air into his nostrils.. “What’s up?” He walked inside, following you to the small kitchen, leaning against the counter while he watched you cook. “I just got back from a work trip.” He said plainly. “Wanted to stop by and check in, make sure you were alright while I was gone and all that.” “Oh yeah, I think I’m doing better, all things considered. I had  a few therapy sessions too.” 

Leon grimaced at how you were holding the pot handle, no holder while stirring the pasta up a bit. Another reminder to him that you weren’t safe even when it came to the smaller things. “That’s good.” He said with a nod. “How did that go?” “They went well. Doctor Birkin is really nice – I owe you one for hooking me up like that.” And there, for the first time in who-knew-how-long was a smile on your face. Small, but there.

“Glad to hear it. Are you going to be seeing him regularly?” “I think so – some of the stuff he said left me feeling a little strange.” “Like?” “Just… he told me I had something like false memory syndrome? I’ve never heard of it before, but I guess it makes sense. He told me I should listen to you, since I trust you, to tell me what’s real and what’s not…” “I don’t think I’ve ever heard of it either – but it’s good to have an answer.” “Yeah, I guess that’s true. But it’s a lot you know? Feeling something so real and having to accept it’s not.” “I can understand that, for sure. Not exactly the same, but I’ve had my fair share of realizations about things I thought were true but turned out not to be.” “Really? Like what?” Leon froze in response to your question, he’d blurted the words out to connect with you, offer sympathies. He hadn’t directly thought about an answer too it. So many things ran through his had at a rapid pace. He considered explaining Raccoon City, or as much of it as he could. He considered just saying working for the government taught him much of the safety civilians expect is a lie – that he learned being a good person wasn’t enough to protect others. Then again, now wasn’t the time for all of that. He tried to come up with an answer but was left empty handed, he was about to stumble out an ‘ummm’ when you spoke instead, much to his relief. “Oh before I forget, there was something else I needed to talk to you about. Oh shit –” You said, turning to the pasta that had now boiled over. “Fuck.” You yanked your hand away from the bubbly mess to turn the stove off, quickly ripping the lid off the pasta letting the white mess return to normal liquid. Sticking a fork into the hot mix you let out a disappointed sigh. “Damn, turned to mush.”

Leon chuckled, putting an arm on your front and gently pulling you back from the stove. “Careful now before you light the place on fire too.” “Oh shut up.” But there was that smile on your face again for a brief moment, a steady reminder that this was all worth it again. “There goes dinner I guess.” “Don’t worry about it. Let me order something instead.” “You sure?” “Yeah, of course. When was the last time we watched a stupid movie and ate junk?” “Good point.” You conceded, following him over to your couch. You laid down, legs draped over his getting comfy in your spot while he opened some delivery app on his phone. “How’s your ankle?” “Much better, still a little sore if I put too much pressure, but I don’t have to wear a cast anymore. Just a brace and I can walk without crutches at least.” He nodded, putting in your regular order. “Chinese alright?” “You know me too well.” You sat up supporting yourself on your elbows for a moment. “Hey Lee? I know it’s been awhile, but would you mind staying the night? I’ve missed you.” “Sure. Would never turn down that offer.” He went to look back at his phone, surprised by how you sat up to move closer, resting your head on his shoulder, wrapping an arm around him from the side. “I’ve really missed you.” You said more firmly. “I’ve missed you too.” He tossed the phone to the side, order now placed before wrapping his arms around you, pulling you down on top of him. He looked up at you, waiting, giving you the chance to decide how you wanted things to go. “Can I kiss you again? I don’t know if I want to do more, but…” “Go for it princess.” Your lips were soft just like he remembered, plush and warm against his own, like they were just meant to meld together. He could feel you relax in his embrace and it was as if the past several weeks were erased from the fabric of time. He knew better than to push you this time around, instead, he let you linger there above him, head resting on his chest as he rubbed your back – the moment only being ruined by the sound of door being knocked on and his phone buzzing to indicate the food was left outside. “Sweetheart?” He called softly, but you hardly responded, lulled nearly to sleep in that awkward spot on top of him. He didn’t have the heart to move you, nor the want. He shrugged mentally deciding the food could wait awhile, having you here and close to him was enough for right now. You were where you belonged, with him, and soon that’s where you’d be permanently. “Good night baby.” He said softly before adjusting just slightly to make the positioning less uncomfortable himself, upcoming plans drifting through his own mind as he did his best to fall asleep.

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Tag List (if i forgot anyone I'm sorry it's been a while 😭: @explorevenus @gigabyte-flare @okayiamkassandra @fouyumixuri @yumeneji @dollfacefantasy @elfven-blog @kaitkatme @tosuckmyweenis

[honeyhotteoks]

this night together - chapter one (j.yh + s.mg)

chapter one: a safe place to land

summary: you're finally getting your dream job, working with some of the best dancers in the business, but a job change means a break in your healthcare coverage and suppressants these days are expensive. going into heat at the studio pretty much seems like the worst case scenario, but you find yourself in the care of two alphas who won't let you go through it alone. note: reader and the boys are not idols in this fic, but instead are part of the bb trippin dance crew. the idol group mentioned in the fic's name is 'new world' which was one of the early options for ateez's name, and i just thought that was cute. overall though, i know very little about dancing and choreography. i did my best to research what that field might be like, but please know there are likely inaccuracies. also.... i have no idea how healthcare coverage with jobs work in korea and my research wasn't too helpful. we're going with what i know which is often a ninety day waiting period before you get health coverage at a new job, which means reader here cannot afford her medication out of pocket. go with it, for me ♡

warnings: just.... so much smut including: heat, nesting, knotting, fingering, oral sex (f receiving), rough sex, big dick yunho, implied breeding kink (it's omegaverse so ya know), gratuitous praise to make reader feel better, lots of pet names, lots of heat symptoms like cramps, slick, and insatiable horniness.

pairings: alpha!yunho x alpha!mingi x omega!reader

genre: smut, abo/omegaverse, angst, fluff, romance, polyamory

word count: 13.6K

next chapter | AO3

The first sign is the headache, a low, dull throb at the back of your skull. It’s not a full-blown migraine yet, but it might become one and that’s your first indication that your heat is close. You’ve done your suppressant rationing and your bargaining and your plotting and planning, but in the end it’s going to come down to luck if you can make it through the recording. 

You had asked the company about their heat leave policy in the most casual way that you could, still new enough to KQ that it seemed natural for an omega to be asking. You don’t know why you were surprised, but as always the policy is disappointing. Full health coverage only after ninety days of employment, and until then not only are your suppressants not covered any heat leave is fully unpaid. 

You had studied your cycle calendar in detail and tried to map out the dates, but no matter how you drew it or cut up the last of your suppressants to try and extend the effects, your heat was going to fall on or around your first real performance. And it’s not like you’re an idol, it’s not like the camera will be focused on you, but the idea of letting your new crew down two months into being here  is too fucked a thought to entertain. 

Your throat feels dry after the first run through of the routine, unnaturally so, a tight cough building in the back of your throat as you try to hold it together. The minute the music fades you’re falling out of formation before anyone else and covering your mouth with your elbow, coughing dryly into your sleeve. 

“You good?” San asks from his place next to you. 

“Mhm,” You nod tightly, but the cough is lodged in your throat, “I just need to,”

A bottle of water is pushed into your hand and you nod in thanks, unscrewing the cap fast and knocking it back, letting the cold water soothe your throat. 

“Are you sick, y/n?” San crosses his arms to appraise you better, ducking his head and getting a good look at you. 

“No, no,” You take a deep breath now that you can and shake your head, “just dry, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to slow us down.” 

“Let’s take five,” Yunho announces from the front. 

You take another sip of water and the group starts to break apart. The cool bottle keeps you grounded and as far from anxiety as you can possibly get with the knowledge of this hanging over you. 

“You good?” Yujin, one of the few other female BB Trippin dancers, asks, her chest heaving as she jogs up to you. 

“Yeah, yeah,” You assure her, “I just need a minute,” 

She squeezes your shoulder before moving past you, and you lean back against the wall nearby before taking a deep breath. Your eyes go unfocused towards the mirror as you collect yourself, drinking more water and hoping that no one’s upset with the delay. You’re still new here, but so far you’ve been accepted into the fold well, only a few of the dancers more aloof, so focused on the work you haven’t had a chance to try and make friends. You hope they aren’t upset at your sudden need for a break right on the first run through on the big day. You feel hot eyes on you, and you focus, catching Minseok in the mirror. He’s always pleasant and polite, but never overly friendly, and when you catch his gaze momentarily you see that his jaw is tight and his throat jumps like a spasm as he swallows and averts his eyes from yours. 

Your brow knits in confusion, but Yunho appearing next to you breaks the brief moment of concentration and you turn towards him. 

His eyes are soft, but his face is still serious and wired into work, “You sure you’re good?” 

“Definitely,” You protest, “really,” 

He chews the inside of his lip for a moment before adjusting the cap on his head and holding out a little bottle of pills, “Your head?” 

“How did you know?” You thought you were good at concealing it. 

“You keep wincing when I put the high lights on,” He nods up towards the fluorescents, “migraine?” 

“A little one,” You assure him, you know he’s got to be worried about you dropping out of formation right before recording, “but I got this,” 

As the lead choreographer and director of today’s stage performance, he’s been on edge this week. He’s so incredibly focused on the finer details down to every precise placement, finger extension, facial expression. You’ve been a dancer for a long time, and you’ve worked behind idol groups before, but not like this. The atmosphere here is different, and working with New World doesn’t feel like backup dancing at all. And for Yunho, it’s become clear to you over the past couple of months that while he isn’t the boss, he is the leader here and he takes that responsibility incredibly personally. 

But despite all that pressure and responsibility, he surprises you when he smiles at your admission, “I get them sometimes. Do you get auras?” 

You shake your head.

“I do,” He offers you the bottle again, “it sucks, but you know, the light sensitivity is always the worst thing,” 

You take the bottle and tip the migraine medication out into your palm, “Yeah,” 

“Are you sure you don’t need to tap out?” He offers, voice a little softer so that it’s a conversation just between you, “I know you don’t want to, but I can’t have you falling on stage,” 

“No, honestly, I wouldn’t put the team in that position,” You look up, trying your best to convey with your eyes that you can make it, even though the low throb in your skull says otherwise. 

“Okay,” He nods once, “I just had to ask. Are you ready?” 

“Ready,” 

“Alright,” He takes a step away and moves back towards the main part of the room. This time he doesn’t adjust the lights, he keeps the room low lit and calm and he claps as he turns back to the room at large, “Let’s run it again. We have an hour before the van gets here, and then from there it’s go time. We ready?” 

A chorus of yes echoes back, and you lend your voice to the mix, shaking off the pounding in your brain. You can do this. You can. Wooyoung punches your arm softly as he walks by you to get to his starting position, flashing you a smile and an encouraging nod. With a deep exhale you let it go, and you get to work. 

By the time you finish the third run through, your muscles are screaming, but you’ve managed to hold the rest tightly in. The migration medication seems to be helping, and though you can sense Yunho continuing to glance at you in the mirror he seems pleased that you’re keeping up. You just need to make it through this day, and then you can let it all fall apart.

With a glance at your watch, the hour now up, you realize just how much more time there is to get through. It’s only six in the morning, the earliest you’ve had to get up and be ready for this job yet. You’ve been told that if you’re ever a supporting dancer for a comeback stage it will be even earlier, two or three to accommodate pre-recording time. For this though, you’re not filming a comeback stage. You’ll get to the studios alongside New World at around seven-thirty, spend at least an hour or two getting ready in the green room, and then from there it will be a waiting game, and you don’t really know how a show like this will go. Music shows are a well oiled machine of time management, but this type of larger long program for their survival show stage is something you just aren’t used to. 

You just have to, without question, make it back home, but that might be eight hours from now or twelve, and that level of uncertainty makes your stomach churn. 

On the bus you take stock. Sore muscles, dry throat, ever so slight cramping in your back, bubbling migraine, fatigue. You’re not yet feeling the waves of hot flashing blush or deep, burgeoning cramps, but it’s not too far off. It feels like at the very least the quarter suppressant you choked down this morning might be doing just enough to mask the scent of your pre-heat, and that’s the best you can do. At least for now, no one’s noticed how close you are to the edge. No one, except possibly Wooyoung. 

“Here,” He says from his seat next to you, offering you a lozenge from a bag, “for your throat,” 

You stare for a second at the offering before your brain fires and you accept one with quiet thanks. Omegas often keep cooling lozenges around for their heat and pre-heat, something to take the edge off the soreness and dryness and it doesn’t surprise you that the only one attuned to your slight discomfort is another omega.

“You can keep the bag,” He places it on your lap, “if you need it,” 

“I’m good,” You pass it back, not wanting to admit how close you really are, “like I said, just dry,” 

“Okay,” He nods, and then he lets the subject lie, “are you ready for today?” 

“Yeah,” You swallow tightly, “nervous, but yeah,” 

“Mm,” He grins, relaxing back into his seat, “it’s fun, I promise,” 

“Yeah?” 

“When you see it all come together on the monitors,” He nods, “it just makes it all worth it,” 

“All the work, you mean?” You can’t help but glance up the length of the bus, to where Yunho sits alongside San and Mingi, all talking quietly and seriously amongst themselves. 

“Yeah,” He nods, “you’ve been working a lot of nights too, catching up,” 

“I just don’t want me being new to be the reason it’s not perfect,” You reply with ease. 

“That’s good,” Wooyoung says, “and I promise if you weren’t nailing it, you’d know by now.” 

“Would I?” 

“You wouldn’t be sitting here,” Wooyoung nods towards the front, “Mingi would have cut you ages ago,” 

“Mingi?” He’s been nothing but nice, flirty, and funny. He’d been helping you out at night to get better, you thought so that Yunho and San didn’t have an inkling that you’re behind. 

“His opinion is the one that matters,” Wooyoung laughs, whispering to you so the rest of the bus can’t hear, “have you not picked up on that yet?” 

You shake your head slowly. 

“y/n,” Wooyoung smiles as he realizes just how clueless you are, “Yunho would recommend we all stop drinking water if Mingi said it was a good idea. Mingi trusts his gut, and Yunho trusts Mingi,” 

“Oh,” You breathe. 

“Yep,”

“What about Jaemin?” You ask softly. You’ve only met the actual crew leader a few times here and there, but most of the time he’s not at the studio itself. 

“He keeps the work coming and the doors open,” Wooyoung says, “but they keep us moving.” 

You let his words sink in, the reality that for weeks you’ve been working side by side with Mingi and confessing all your fears of inadequacy, that he was the person who had to approve of you all along and you never knew it. You sigh, “Are you just trying to hype me up, or are you being serious?” 

“I don’t lie.” He says, full stop, no room for misinterpretation. 

The menthol lozenge burns a little on your tongue, but soothes the cut feeling in the back of your throat when you swallow and you find that finally for the first time all night you’re able to really exhale. With a soft nod you turn to him, “Okay,” 

“Okay?” 

“Let’s fucking do this,” 

He grins, “After this stage you’re officially one of us, you know,” 

Your eyes narrow, “You said that after my first week,” 

He rolls his eyes, “Okay, maybe I lie a little,” 

For the afternoon, with the lightness of Wooyoung by your side, you forget about your headache. The day happens fast, even with all the sitting and waiting in green rooms. There’s so much to remember, from camera positions to where the light is coming from, to how to adapt to the stage floor being just a little smaller than what you were working with back at KQ. The members seem suddenly focused in a way you’ve never experienced, you know what this means to them. To all of you. By the time it’s filming, you’ve had at least six lozenges and taken two more painkillers for your migraine to keep it at bay, and you're starting to feel exhausted. You film it twice, from two angles. Wide for choreography and tighter close ups on the members for cinematic facial expressions and intricacies of movement. 

When it’s all over and you pile back into the van, your legs feel heavy and disconnected. If you can just make it back to the studio, you can change and call an Uber and get inside before it knocks you sideways. 

Someone suggests drinks, someone else suggests a celebratory meal. 

You want nothing more than for the van to speed up. 

You grip your hand tight and breathe through the tight sensations in your body and no one ever notices a thing, not even Wooyoung who seems caught in the euphoria of the performance, your quietness blissfully overlooked for the moment. 

At the studio, it takes time for the locker room to clear out after the show, everyone else riding on the high of the performance too and slow to pack up for the night. It had gone so well, despite the way you had to push through the pain.  As the pain worsens, you’re not sure how you’re going to get home, but you know you need to figure it out soon. You can maybe call one of your roommates, but on a Friday night it feels unlikely that they’ll be available or sober enough to get you. 

A cramp ripples through you, and you grip down on the wooden bench, your leg bouncing to try and distract you from the waves of sensation washing over you. It’s been years since your last heat, and you can already tell this is going to be hard and heady. Sweat is collecting on your brow, waves of uncomfortable warmth passing through your body, and you can feel the way your breath is tightening. You really don’t have long, a matter of hours maybe, but it’s obvious to anyone who looks at you what’s going on. 

You fish your phone out of your bag and scan through your contacts, blinking hard to try and clear your blurring vision. The phone keeps ringing, first one of your roommates, then another, and when you hit their voicemail boxes for the second time, your phone slips from your fingers in frustration. Tears prick the back of your eyes, your hands shaking. You really thought you had more time. 

A noise across the locker room startles you, the heavy metal clang of a locker closing and you realize someone’s still in here with you. You’re trembling, a mix of abject panic and pain, your omega surfacing inside you in a way that you can’t control. Footsteps come closer, and though you’re still shielded by a row of lockers and can’t see him, you can smell him. Rich, cocoa and cinnamon. 

Mingi walks past your section of lockers, and you hope he won’t notice, but you’re never, ever that lucky. 

“Hey,” He says when he catches sight of you, “you did good tonight,” 

You keep your eyes away from his, curling down further to tug at the laces of your shoes and hope that he doesn’t notice the way you’re clenching your jaw to keep from crying, “Thanks,” 

“Yeah,” He says, and you hear his steps shift and then pause. 

Your eyes press closed as you hide behind the curtain of your hair. 

“y/n,” Mingi asks, “are you okay?”

“Mhm,” You pull your laces tight, your insides cramping painfully as your body registers the presence of an alpha. 

“Are you sure?” He asks. 

Biting down on the inside of your cheek you steady your voice, “Yeah, I’m good, just tired.” 

Mingi doesn’t answer, doesn’t move, and there’s really only so long you can pretend to tie your shoes. You tug your other laces taut and then do your best, leaning back up into a normal sitting position despite the pained pressure inside you. You grip down on the bench again and breathe slowly through your nose. 

“Are you hurt?” Mingi asks, concern evident in his voice, “Did you pull something?” 

You shake your head, you can’t trust your words. 

“Something’s wrong,” Mingi takes a step forward and you jolt back, sliding off the edge of the bench with a tight sound, your back connecting hard with the lockers behind you. His eyes widen at your sudden movement and you hold a hand out to keep him right where is. 

“Stop,” You plead, body shaking, “don’t,” 

“You are hurt,” He can feel your fear, and his eyes are panicked as he scans your body, “what happened?” 

“It’s not,” You sigh, shaking your head, another hot flash making your cheeks light up with blush and cutting your words. 

When he takes another step forwards you watch his face change, the way his breathing settles low into his chest as he regards you and comprehension starts to relax his face. Your eyes press closed as another cramp ripples through your abdomen, and suddenly you feel the first rush of slick. 

“Fuck,” Mingi says, “what are you doing here?” 

“Working,” You groan, opening your eyes again. 

“You should be on heat leave,” He shakes his head, “you should be home,”

“I know,” You nod, your throat growing tight and tears bubbling back up, “I-I asked, but it would have been unpaid, and with the performance… I couldn’t afford to not be here. I thought I had a little more time,” 

“Okay,” He steps a little closer and you shake your head, pressing your body back further against the lockers as if that will do anything, “it’s okay, I’m not going to hurt you.” 

“I know that,” You laugh humorlessly, “but right now your scent is making this harder,” 

“Oh,” He swallows hard, “I didn’t mean to,” 

“Mingi,” You meet his gaze and his eyes soften, “I need help,” You wish you didn’t have to ask. You wish you had just stayed home, not rationed your suppressants, and just handled this on your own. 

He nods, straightening up and swallowing hard, “Okay, let’s go,” 

“Go?” You watch as he picks up your bag and slings it over his shoulder with his own. 

“Can you walk?” He holds a hand out to you, an offering and nothing more if you want it. 

“Yeah,” You stammer, pushing yourself off the lockers, but one step already has you shaky and you grip his hand and let him hold your weight to keep you standing. 

“Alright,” He shakes his head, “I’m sorry, just hold your breath or something,” 

His arm wraps around your back, pulling you up and supporting your weight with a sure hand on your forearm and with his help, you take a step. His scent is dizzying, equal parts calming and arousing, and tears roll down your cheeks as you try to keep quiet and hold it together. Slick pools between your thighs and you’re sure he can smell it, but he’s doing a good job of saying nothing about it to you. 

“W-where are we going?” You manage as he pushes the door to the locker room open and steers you out into the dimly lit hallway of the dance studio. 

“We need to get Yunho,” He says with ease, like it’s obvious and poses absolutely no problem. 

At the thought of him, your body clenches and you bite down to keep a tight, pained sound inside. “No, Mingi, he can’t,” 

“We’re past that point,” Mingi is all but dragging you now, “I need his help, I can’t get you home by myself.” 

Yunho’s the only one with a car between them, not the mention a driver’s license. Mingi typically hitches a ride with him or using the subway, and at this stage in your heat, it’s not safe to take public transportation or put you in a taxi. There are too many variables, too many people you don’t know, and you need someone you trust to get you to a safe location to ride this out. The idea of Yunho tears your body in two, caught between the feeling of wanting him and never wanting him to know about this, but you know he’s safe, that safe place. 

There’s a light still on in the office at the end of the hall where you know Yunho is going through footage from the day and making notes while things are still fresh in his mind. When you’re close enough to the door but still safely in the hall, Mingi calls out, “Yunho!”

“Yeah?” He shouts back, and you can hear the distraction in his voice, a clear picture of him writing something down as he calls over his shoulder. 

“I need your help,” Mingi adjusts his grip on you, holding you close as your body trembles in his arms, “like right now,” 

“Uh,” Yunho trails off, “yeah, okay, yeah, I’m coming.” You hear Yunho jump up from the chair in the office, his quick footsteps, and another wave of fear flutters through you. 

“Mingi,” You grip down on his hand. 

“Right, fuck,” He remembers himself, tucking you closer to his chest, “slowly,” 

“What?” Yunho’s voice comes from the office but you can see his shadow on the floor in the hall as he gets closer to the door. 

“Yunho!” Mingi’s voice is deep, clear and firm and you let your head rock back on his shoulder, “Slowly, seriously,” 

He’s not distracted anymore, he’s incredibly alert. Yunho steps into the hallway slowly, just as directed when he hears the tenor of his best friend’s voice, and it takes him seconds to size up what’s going on. 

“y/n,” He takes a half step forward and stops himself, arm outstretched, “oh no,” 

His soft tone soothes you instantly but it doesn't help the emotional live wire you feel like you’re walking, and a little sob bubbles out of you, “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry,” 

“You’re in heat,” He says, shaking his head, “it’s not safe for you to be here, why are you here?” 

Your omega shrinks and more tears spill over, the wave uncontrollable now, “I’m sorry, please,” 

Yunho’s eyes flick to Mingi’s before he comes closer, reaching out for you, “I’m not upset,” 

Relief washes through you, “You’re not?” 

“No,” He assures you, his voice dropping to a warm and even tone, “I’m just worried about you, I want you safe. Come here,” 

You comply instantly, stepping out of Mingi’s hold and straight into Yunho’s arms, letting him tuck you close into his chest before he adjusts his stance and brings your face up to the crook of his neck. His scent washes over you like a salve, nothing but warm rain and fresh cut cedar. 

“Shh,” He soothes you, running a hand down your back, “there we go, take a deep breath,” 

For a minute, it feels like your cramps have passed, your head clearing. He grounds you and brings you back into your body with his touch and you breathe low and slow, your hands gripping his shirt. 

“Okay,” Yunho murmurs, “what’s your heat plan? We can take you and get you there safe,” 

You shake your head into his neck, nuzzling closer to his skin, “I don’t really have one,” 

“What do you mean?” He asks, clearly not understanding. 

“You can take me home,” You tell him, eyes drifting closed, “I usually can take care of things myself,”

“That’s insane,” Mingi says from behind you both, and you feel Yunho’s hands tighten on your back. 

“Who’s there with you?” Yunho asks, “Don’t you have roommates?” 

You nod, resting on his shoulder, “Mhm,” 

“y/n,” He prompts you, “what are their designations?” 

“Mm,” You’re feeling so warm wrapped in his scent, “Ari and Hyejin are betas, Hyunwoo is an alpha but he’s probably out tonight,” 

“Tonight,” Yunho shakes his head, “you go through heats like this with an alpha home?” 

“Not like this,” You mumble into his chest and he shifts you in his arms. 

“What did you say?” 

“Not a heat like this,” You manage, “I’m normally on pretty heavy suppressants,” 

“She can’t go home like this,” Mingi says, “this is still just pre-heat,”

“I think so,” Yunho’s voice sounds far away, and you sink into the steady sound of his heart and the feeling of his hand smoothing a comforting line up and down your back. When he finally speaks again, his voice is so tender you almost don’t recognize it, “Can we bring you home? Let me help, you can’t go through a heat this hard by yourself,” 

“Yunho,” You shudder against him, “we can’t,” 

The thought of his cock inside you flashes through your brain, and you imagine the feeling of his swollen knot locking in, your body full and sated and the cramps dissipating. Your core throbs at the idea and you feel another rush of slick rush through you. 

“You’re in pain,” He murmurs, dropping his head a little lower, “you need an alpha. Let me take care of you, let me take you home,” 

You should say no, you should take your chances in your apartment with your box of toys and a bottle of lube, but you keep breathing in his steady scent and all you can do is say yes. Yunho’s been kind to you since the beginning, taking care of you for weeks even if he didn’t really know it, and he can take care of you now too if you just let him. 

“We’ll take care of you,” Mingi cuts in, offering his help softly, “and make sure you’re safe until it’s over,” 

“Are you sure?” You pull back from Yunho’s neck, leaning heavily on his chest still. 

He cups your cheek in his broad hand, bringing your eyes up to his, and nods, “Positive, and if you don’t,” he swallows hard tries to find the right words, “if you don’t want to have sex we can figure something out, but you need a place that’s private, and you need to be with more experienced alphas who know how to keep their hands to themselves.”

They’re not wrong. You just have to trust them. You just have to let go. 

Your body makes the decision for you, the way your aching and throbbing is soothed just being between them, and you let your mind follow. 

“Okay,” You sigh, leaning into his hand, “yes,” 

“Alright,” He sighs, “don’t worry about a thing, okay? We’ll get you home.” Yunho’s thumb rubs a soothing pattern into the soft gland at your wrist and it relaxes you further. He looks over you for a moment, “Mingi, I need you to take her for a minute, I’ll get the car.” 

When Yunho steps away, just to try and pass you back to Mingi, the lack of contact strikes panic through you and you shake your head, “No, no, don’t go,” 

“It’s not for long,” He assures you, his hands sliding down your arms as he separates from you slowly, “I’ll be back in 5 minutes,” 

A panicked whine leaves your throat and your mind spins, “Don’t leave me!” 

“Hey,” He soothes you but you don’t respond, all you know is he’s leaving and you’ll be without him and the thought makes your body clench. “y/n, hey, y/n,” He tries again but you’re shaking your head. “Omega.” His voice roots you to the spot. 

Mingi’s hands close over you gingerly from behind, and Yunho nods as your panicked noises stop, “Okay, see?” He says, “Listen to me, omega, I’m not going far. You won’t be alone, Mingi’s right here. I’ll be back in five minutes, and then I won’t leave you again, okay?” 

“Okay,” You lean back into Mingi, and let his touch keep you warm. 

Yunho nods and then keeps his eyes on you as he moves back to the office, darting out of your eye line for a moment. You can hear him grabbing his things; the zip of his bag, the jingle of his keys, and the lights flick off before he jogs back out. 

“Here,” He says, holding out his jacket, “put this on,” 

Mingi takes it from his hands, and eases it onto you. When you pull the jacket up, his scent washes over you again and you sigh. 

“Better?” Yunho asks. 

“Mhm,” You murmur, and tucked into the warmth of Mingi’s chest with their combined scents easing you, you can breathe. You keep your eyes closed, but you hear when Yunho walks out the front door and your body clenches a little, but you take a deep breath in.

“Mingi,” You finally say, looking up at him, “thank you for not leaving me,” 

“Hey,” He shakes his head, “I was never going to leave you there,”

You nod, twisting in his arms so you can tuck your face into his chest and let his arms wrap fully around you, “I’m sorry,” you sigh, “I’m not usually such a touchy person,” 

He chuckles, smoothing your hair with his hand, “It’s okay, I like it,” 

“And Yunho?” 

“Oh,” Mingi laughs, “he’s a cuddler, don’t worry.” 

Your stomach cramps and you groan into his chest, “God,” you grip him, “I forgot how much this hurts,” 

“How long has it been?” Mingi shifts his grip so that more of your weight is supported, “You know, since your last real heat?” 

“Years,” You tell him honestly, “they’ve been so much easier on suppressants,” 

“Mm,” Mingi nods above you, “when this hits it’s going to be intense,” 

“Have you helped a partner through heat before?” 

“I have,” Mingi says, “but Yunho hasn’t,” 

“Oh,” You have no idea why Yunho offered himself up immediately like he had done it a thousand times before if he’s never shared a heat with someone. The sure, practiced tenor of his voice when he called you omega rings in your ears. 

“Don’t worry,” Mingi assures you, “I know what I’m doing, and Yunho’s got a handle on himself. He won’t touch you if you don’t want him to,” 

“I’m really, really not worried about that,” You sigh. 

“Good,” Mingi’s phone starts to vibrate in his pocket, and he adjusts his arms around you so he can find it, “We’ll take care of you - Hey? Are you out front?” 

You can’t hear Yunho’s side of the conversation but you just wait, held against him. 

“Okay, I got her,” Mingi says, and you smile. 

You forgot the way that heat takes over every physical sensation, every little thing heightened until you feel like you’re on a razor’s edge. In a matter of hours you’re going to be a writhing mess, in so much pain you might be delirious - you might ask anything of them, beg for anything.  You have to reconcile with your shame now, and let them help. After weeks of dancing around Yunho, what you really want is to ask him out for coffee, not this. Mingi is no stranger to being flirtatious, those sparks between you already evident, but it always felt like a little inside joke between friends, not a step towards anything more.  

“Alright, just a little further,” Mingi urges you as he slips his arm under yours. 

It takes time to get to the car, but when you get there, Mingi slides into the backseat with you instead of taking the front with Yunho like he normally would. Enclosed in the warmth of the car, you relax into Mingi’s arms and find Yunho’s eyes studying you in the rearview mirror. Their scents settle you a bit, more than any other alpha’s ever has. 

“I’m okay,” You assure them, “it’s coming and going,” 

“We don’t live too far,” Yunho smiles, “so just try to relax and we’ll be inside soon, okay?” 

“Yeah,” 

Mingi eases you against him, feeling your exhaustion, until you’re nestled in his lap with his fingers softly carding through your hair. Yunho’s eyes flick back to you again and again as he drives, but for the first time since the locker room, you’re not in too much pain. 

“Yunho,” Mingi murmurs and his friend hums a noise of acknowledgement, “we need to pick up a few things for her,” 

“What do you mean?” 

“She needs to eat before this really starts,” Mingi says quietly, “I think we have water bottles at home and ice packs?” 

“Yeah we do, I went to the store a couple days ago,” Yunho glances back at you again. 

“Okay,” Mingi’s fingers keep up their soothing brushes on your scalp, “and we need condoms, in case.” 

“Oh,” Yunho blinks and opens his mouth to say something but you get there more quickly. 

“We don’t need them,” You twitch as a cramp ripples through you, “I’m on birth control,” 

“If it would make you feel more comfortable though,” Mingi offers. 

“No,” You groan a little and shift on the uncomfortable back seat, “really, I’m good.” 

The car is quiet for a minute, the reality sinking in that they won’t just be keeping you safe tucked away in a room in their apartment, but they will be helping you. Yunho clears his throat, “Then we’re good, let’s get you home and in bed, and then we can order food? Do we have time?” 

“Mhm,” You assure him, “I’m okay now that i’m with you both,” 

“Exactly,” Mingi soothes you as your fists tighten, eyes closing as you breathe through another small cramp, “your alphas will take good care of you,” 

You release a shuddering breath, the word sinking into your chest and keeping you whole. 

“Almost there,” He murmurs, “just breathe, omega,” 

Getting you upstairs to their apartment proves a little challenging, moving through the lobby of the apartment building and ferrying you into an elevator. They stay close to you, keeping you firmly tucked between them as they walk you in, and you do your very best to seem in control and not draw any unnecessary attention. 

The minute their apartment door closes though, your legs give out and Mingi scoops you up, “You did so well,” he assures you, and it’s evident now that he is the one with the experience here, knowing exactly what the primal part of your brain needs to hear. 

“I’ll order food,” Yunho says, giving you a small smile. 

“Get her some meat,” Mingi directs him, “broth too, and lots of rice,” 

“You are good at this,” You sigh. 

“We got you,” Mingi grins, acting like this is second nature, “now… I can put you to bed, or would you like a cool shower before you lay down? I know that helps,” 

“Mm, yes please,” You nod. 

“Alright,” Mingi nods and looks up, “get the food going, and then meet me in my room with some water and the ice packs.” 

“Right,” Yunho looks at you, “are you okay with just Mingi?” 

“Yeah,” You smile, “I’m feeling okay,” 

“Good,” Yunho smiles back and pulls out his phone to order the food, “then I’ll meet you there.” 

Mingi sets you up in the bathroom with ease, making sure you have towels and everything you need. Your heat is coming, building inside your body with every cramp and rush of warm blush, but their combined scents keep things calm enough for you to take care of yourself a bit. He asks you to keep the door unlocked in case you need help, and leaves you to your moment of peace. You let the cool water settle your body, taking solace in this dip of your pre-heat before things get worse. 

When you’re done, wrapped up in fluffy towels and feeling decidedly less sticky from the combination of sweat and slick, you make your way out into the hall. There are three bedrooms, an empty one you assume is Yunho’s, one that’s been converted into an office, and then one larger room at the end of the hall that you know must be Mingi’s. 

He appears in the doorway before you make it too much further and smiles, “Feeling better?” 

“Yes, thank you so much,” 

“Mhm,” He reaches for you, “come on in, we got everything ready for you,” 

His bedroom smells overwhelmingly like cinnamon when you first cross through the door and you feel a tense flutter in your core. His room is tidy, clean and organized well, which feels surprising for Mingi given how chaotic and busy he can seem at times. The bed is made, but the covers are pulled back for you and you see a folded shirt and thin sleep pants at the edge of the bed. Yunho is sitting in a chair in the corner by the foot of the bed and waiting, the dresser adjacent to his side equipped with almost everything you’ll need. Water bottles, pain killers, and ice packs, an unfilled bowl with a few washcloths stacked inside. 

“How do you know all this?” You catch Mingi’s eye. 

“My girlfriend in college went through terrible heats,” He explains easily, directing you towards the bed, “I remember what used to make her feel a little better,” 

“Ah,” That explains so much of him, and his easy reaction to finding you in the locker room. 

“Do you need help getting dressed at all?” He asks. 

“No, I just really want to lie down,” Your limbs are starting to feel heavy and achy. 

“We’ll leave you be then,” Yunho offers, “and when the food gets here we’ll bring some in,”

“Mhm,” You sigh, sinking down onto the bed, “thank you both again, so much,” 

When you’re finally alone in Mingi’s room, you start to take stock of your body and how it feels, getting a sense of how far you are from the real thick of your heat. Judging by the intensity of your cramps and the fact that you’re starting to produce slick, you know you’re not too far off, maybe a few hours at most. The onset of your heat is normally much slower than this, a long few days of light pre-heat into a couple of days of uncomfortable cramps and extremely high arousal. On suppressants it feels easy, off them everything is unpredictable. 

You pull on the clothes they left you, but they smell like stale lavender, artificial like laundry detergent and it’s not helping. You find the hamper in the corner and toss off the top, digging through Mingi’s clothes until you find a hoodie and you bury your face in it before taking a deep inhale and letting the warm smell of him pass through you. It might be crossing a line, but you don’t really care, you need them.

A pulsing wave passes through you and you collapse back into the bed, tugging on the hoodie and curling yourself up in the covers. The bed smells like him too, and you gather a pillow to your chest and take a deep inhale. Your neediness is starting to build up again with every passing minute, flushing heat through your chest and where you were cold a moment ago you’re suddenly overheated. You kick off the covers, but keep them close, and pile the pillows around you too so you can better inhale his scent. 

Slick rushes forwards again and you bite your inner cheek to stifle a moan and keep things in check. You push off the sleep pants they had given you, and fish through your gym bag until you find a clean pair of underwear and some wipes. You clean yourself up a bit, and change your underwear for the third time today, before deciding that there’s no point in putting the pants back on. Mingi’s hoodie falls low over your shorter frame, dragging along your thighs. 

You bury yourself back in his bed, and do your best to get a little rest before what’s to come. 

When you wake, it’s to Mingi pushing back his hoodie so he can see your face a little better, “Hey,” he murmurs, “how are you feeling?” 

“Tired,” You sigh, “and sore,” 

“Okay,” He smiles and tugs lightly on the strings of his hoodie, “is this helping?” 

“Mm,” You nod into his palm, but nervous knots start to curl up in your belly, “where’s Yunho?” 

“I’m here,” Yunho’s voice comes from the opposite side of the bed, and you twist in the sheets to find him, a cramp pulsing through you as you do and you groan, gripping onto the bed sheets beneath you. 

“Easy,” Mingi scolds you softly, “you need all the rest you can get,” 

Yunho finds your eyes and smiles, “What’s wrong?” He asks gently, noticing your nervous fidgeting. 

“I don’t know, I thought you left,” You manage. 

“I’m an idiot,” Mingi sighs behind you and his hand that rests on your hip shifts away, “stay with her a second,” 

“Mhm,” Yunho’s eyes don’t leave you, and he reaches out to rest his hand on yours, “we’ve got dinner, and then once you eat you can rest, we won’t go anywhere.” 

You watch his face as he studies your features, his breathing slow and steady, when you hear Mingi come back into the room behind you. “Here we go,” He says, and you feel a large, soft blanket draping over you. The smell of wet earth and rain in the air fills your senses again and you drag the blanket up and around you with a sigh. 

“You’re nesting,” Yunho observes, his mouth dropping open, “of course,” 

“She couldn’t smell you in here,” Mingi explains with ease, “she needs you to relax,” 

You nod, your cheek pressed against the blanket, “You smell like a thunderstorm,” 

Yunho sits slowly on the bed by your side, brushing your hair back behind your ear and smoothing his thumb along your cheekbone, “Is that right?” he smiles. 

“I love thunderstorms,” Your eyes drift closed. 

Mingi chuckles, “I think she’s found herself a heat partner,” 

“Only if she wants one,” Yunho presses, “and only after she eats,” 

Your eyes reopen, and you push yourself up to your knees, dropping the hood of Mingi’s sweatshirt and running your hands over your warm cheeks. “We need to talk now,” You blink hard and take a deep breath, “before I get too far into this,” 

“Let’s eat then,” Mingi gestures for you to sit back more comfortably and you watch as he and Yunho both produce boxes of take out from bags on the dresser, “what are you thinking?” 

“Well,” You shift up the bed to lean against the headboard, dragging Yunho’s blanket with you, “I haven’t gone through this in a while. I’m not sure how it’s going to be, but you said you wanted to help. What did you mean by it?” 

Yunho looks like he’s not sure exactly what to say or where to start and Mingi cuts in smoothly, “I’m willing to help with all of it. If you want me gone, I’m gone. If you want help to come to take the edge off, I can do that, and if you want me to actually knot you,” he gestures for you to fill in the blanks. 

“Right,” 

“But,” Mingi cuts in and your eyes shift back to him, “You seem to want Yunho,” 

His eyes flick down to the way you’re rubbing his blanket between your thumb and forefinger and you drop it instantly, not even realizing what you were doing. Mingi smiles softly and adds, “I think you prefer his scent,” 

“No!” You exclaim, wincing at the way your body tenses up, “No, it’s not that, at all.” 

“Earlier,” Mingi takes a seat on the edge of the bed, “you said my scent was making it harder, that’s not what I want to do for you.” 

“Mingi,” You shake your head, “I meant because it’s good, both of you. So, no I don’t have a preference.” 

“Oh,” Mingi smiles, and then turns to Yunho, “how are you feeling?” 

He clears his throat softly and nods, “The same as you, I’m all in.” 

“Okay,” You exhale slowly, “then so am I,” 

Mingi passes you a take out container and a pair of chopsticks, “Eat this, okay?” 

“Mhm,” You’re caught between exhaustion and adrenaline, but you stay focused on the task at hand. You all eat quietly, the atmosphere a little awkward now that you’ve all agreed. 

As you finish the container of food, Yunho smoothly passes you another and he says, “So, you feel comfortable with us?” 

“I do,” You nod, shifting a little at a slight pain in your back, “I like you both, and if I can trust you in the studio, I can trust you with this.” 

“And if you ask us to knot you?” Mingi prompts. 

“Right,” You swallow, resting the container of food on your lap, “I guess there are some things we should say now,” 

They look at you, waiting expectantly. 

“People say things during heat,” You start, imagining all the things you might beg them for for the next few days to come. “It’s not like I’ll be out of my mind or anything, you know that,” You nod to Mingi. 

“Mhm,” 

“But it’s still hard to control,” You explain, and Yunho listens intently, “I don’t know what it’ll be like for me. It’s been a long time, but you have my permission to do whatever we need to. If I ask you to knot me, knot me.” 

“Okay,” Mingi nods, “it’s good that we’re clear.” 

You feel another flush up your chest and you breathe slowly, “But no matter what,” you hold their gazes, “if I ask you to claim me, don’t. Don’t do it, even if I tell you I’m sure.” 

“Absolutely not,” Mingi’s brow furrows, and he looks shocked that you’d even have to say it, “there’s no way.” 

“I know you know,” You swallow and reach for a water bottle on the nightstand, “but Yunho, you’ve never done this before.” 

“That might be true,” He shakes his head, “but I know you wouldn’t mean that, it would just be the heat talking,” 

“Exactly,” You nod, “I might sound like I want that or like I need that, but I don’t.” 

“Understood,” Yunho nods, “I wouldn’t, I swear,” 

You sink back into your pillows and tuck back into your box of food, “I just want you to be prepared,” you explain, “and before I start crying and begging you to give me a pup, I wanted to say it,” 

Mingi laughs into his food, choking a little, “Sorry, no, not funny,” 

You smile, the mood a little lighter now, “It’s kind of funny.” 

Yunho smiles, shifting further onto the bed as he all but inhales his noodles, “You seem a better, I thought it was going to just get worse,” 

“Oh, it will,” You shrug, “but the food is nice, and you’re both here with me. When Mingi found me I was scared and alone, which always makes it worse,” 

Mingi’s hand rubs a comforting line up your shin, “You’re very safe now,” 

“I know,” You nod. 

“Eat some more,” Yunho notices that you’ve taken too long of a pause, and he gestures for you to keep going, “and then what would be nice? Some sleep?” 

“Maybe,” You dip back into your rice, “would you stay?” 

“I’ll stay,” Yunho murmurs. 

“Me too,” Mingi adds. 

They keep on you to eat, making sure you’ve had your fill. Afterwards, you rest between them watching some television, keeping your mind off things as best you can while you’re still feeling somewhat okay. They’re careful of you though, every shift of your body and soft hiss through your teeth drawing their attention. Mingi is still cool and evenly calm, but surprisingly Yunho is too, and you wonder what they talked about while you were in the shower. Did they discuss what to do at all? What the night and the next few days would be like? 

You’re so exhausted, slipping further down into the bed, nestled in pillows and wrapped in Yunho’s blanket. They naturally gravitate closer, their hands finding their way to your skin, and you’re not sure if it’s just their alpha nature or if it’s them, but you’ve never been more grateful for it. 

The cramps start to become unbearable again soon after they start to hold you. You’re not sure if their presence is making things move more quickly, let alone being with two alphas, but within the hour the pain sets in. 

You curl into Mingi’s chest as tight pain cuts through you, “Fuck,” you pant against him, “it hurts,” 

“I know,” Mingi soothes you, scooting down the bed until he’s eye to eye with you, “but you’re not alone,” 

A sharper, biting pain rips through you and a flood of heat washes over you. You grip down hard on Yunho’s hand, curling into yourself with a taut moan, “It… it hurts,” 

“Shh,” Yunho kisses your hair, running his hand up and down the expanse of your abdomen, “I know it hurts, jagiya,” 

You whine at the name, desperate to hear him call you anything and everything. Your omega thrums inside you - every touch telling you just how much closer your heat is than you realize. “Please,” You plead, but you don’t know exactly what you’re pleading for, “I can’t breathe,” 

“Yes, you can,” Mingi tries to sooth you, his hand on your cheek, “look at me, y/n, come on omega,” 

Tears well in your eyes, heat flooding through your veins and a pulsating need fluttering through you. If they don’t touch you, you might wither into nothing. Your hips tuck back into Yunho’s and you groan, “I can’t,” 

“She’s burning up,” Yunho murmurs from your side. 

“Let’s take this off then,” Mingi tugs on the sleeves of his hoodie slowly, coaxing your arm through. He can see your rising panic at the idea you won't be wrapped in their scents, but he shakes his head slowly, “easy, love, let your alphas help,” 

As the heavy sweatshirt is pulled away, you drop back on the bedding between them. The thin t-shirt they gave you is all but soaked through with sweat, sticking to your curves. Your head is aching, waves of feverish heat washing over you again and again, and you whimper, your legs twitching as you try to find a somewhat comfortable position. 

“Hey, hey,” Yunho’s thumb settles over the swollen gland in your neck, and he strokes it soft and slow, “just breathe,” 

It settles you, just a bit, and you let your eyes drift shut. With a sigh you reach for Mingi just to feel a bit of his skin on yours, “I’m not even properly in heat yet and I feel like I could crawl out of my skin,” 

“Hot?” Mingi brushes the damp hair back from your forehead. 

“It’s like my skin is tingling,” You murmur, “like a nerve,”

“Okay,” He nods. He shifts off the bed and your eyes flutter open. Mingi soothes you with a gentle hand, before moving towards the dresser, “Yunho, get those clothes off her,” 

Yunho’s eyes lock on yours, “Can I?” 

You nod, your head feeling full and pained. 

Yunho’s hand slips under the edge of your damp shirt, coasting up your stomach as he pushes the fabric up and the drag of his hot hand sends a pulse through your body. You moan, head dropping back into the bedding, and you feel another gush of slick. 

“It’s okay,” Yunho soothes as you he drops your shirt to the side of the bed, “there’s nothing to be embarrassed about,” 

You huff, a light laugh as you shake your head, “Easy for you to say, you’re not falling apart whenever I touch you,” 

“Yet,” He smiles. 

“Who are you kidding?” Mingi returns to your bedside with a bowl of cool ice water and a damp washcloth. He throws a smile at his friend before ringing out the washcloth over the bowl, “The minute you saw us in the hall you were all alpha protection mode, scenting her and everything,” 

“Shut up,” 

You grin, but Mingi sweeps a cold line up your body with the cloth and you shudder, “Fuck, that’s nice,” 

“Good,” Mingi murmurs, passing another wet washcloth to Yunho. When Mingi presses a firm line up your chest, and sweeping a little too close to your neck your body arches and your nipples harden into painful peaks. 

You blush hard and drop a hand over your face, “I can’t believe we’re doing this,” 

“Why?” Yunho asks gently, wiping your brow with the cool cloth. 

“We work together,” You sigh, “closely together… I probably should have made you take me home or something but,”

“Do knotting dildos even really help?” Mingi asks bluntly. 

“I mean,” You shrug, “they get the job done,”  

“Hmm,” Mingi shakes his head, “not with a heat like this,” 

“Maybe,” You sigh. 

“y/n,” Yunho asks, “have you had a heat partner before? Have you been knotted?” 

“A long time ago,” You nod, “it wasn’t a great experience, but you know, it is what it is.” 

Yunho passes the cloth down your chest and you shudder, but he keeps the conversation going, “Why in the world are you off your suppressants then?” 

Your eyes flick down, and you swallow hard, “I can’t afford them right now,” 

“Wait,” Mingi shakes his head, “what?” 

“The brand I’m on is the only one that works for me,” You explain, “they’re not priced like the generics, and I don’t have coverage yet. I’ve been rationing them out, but,” 

“You should have talked to me about it,” Yunho shakes his head, brows knit together in concern, “we could have done something for you,” 

“Yunho,” You meet his eyes, “I appreciate that, but I’m still kind of new here. I’m just trying to prove I belong here, and I didn’t want a reason to need a special exception.”

He looks like he wants to say something, but settles on nodding, “I can understand that.” 

“I’m,” You tense up as your cramps intensify, “I’m glad to know I can talk to you, I’ll do it in the future, I just couldn’t come to you about this.” 

“Alright,” He nods, his voice shifting to soothe again as your eyes clamp tightly shut. 

“Are they worse?” Mingi asks. 

You can’t answer, not yet, your muscles are locked up in crippling pain and you feel like you’re drowning in a sudden wave of hot air. You gasp as you feel your body produce more slick, your thighs surely sticky now, and you’re suddenly hyper aware of their hands and where they rest on your body. 

“I think,” Your hips jerk as Mingi slides the washcloth just an inch up your side, “oh God, I think,” 

“Okay,” Yunho pets your hair gently, “okay, just breathe,” 

Your fingers tighten in the sheets beneath you and an overwhelming ache between your thighs reminds you just how empty your body is. You press your thighs together, feeling a throb in your core, and you can’t stop the whimper that bubbles from your lips. 

“Let’s get these off too,” Mingi murmurs, his hands settling on your hip and tugging at your underwear to slowly peel them off.  

Things are spinning around you, tense and painful suddenly and no amount of cool washcloths or gentle touches are going to help you now. Your vision feels blurry, and you curl into yourself, tucking your body into Yunho’s chest with a pained hiss. 

“Oh, come here,” Yunho tucks you close, “I’ve got you,”

“Alpha,” You feel like crying suddenly, your stomach tense, “alpha, please,” 

“What, jagiya?” Yunho murmurs against your hair. 

You can’t explain what you need, all you know is that you can’t feel him close enough and you push the edges of his shirt up to try and find more of him, “Please,” you whine as you try to feel more of his skin on yours. 

“Whoa, whoa,” He tries to catch your hands but it just makes you more tense. 

“K-knot me,” Your stomach cramps, your cunt feeling swollen and sensitive, “please,” 

“y/n,” Yunho tries again to pull your hands away but you drive forwards, pressing your cheek against his bare chest where his shirt is ridden all the way up and you sigh into his skin, pressing frantic kisses along his body. 

“Please,” You beg again, “I’ll be so good for you, so good,” 

“I know you will,” He manages, but he can’t deter you, and you feel the moment his body responds to yours. His hands tighten pleasantly on your hips, and you hear the change in his breath. He releases your hands and swallows hard, “Alright, alright,” 

“No,” Mingi interrupts, “not yet,” 

“Why?” You sob. 

“You’re not ready yet,” He soothes, shifting closer behind you and placing a warm kiss on your bare back, “and Yunho and I are not going to hurt you tonight,” 

“I don’t care,” Your hands slide down Yunho’s chest, searching for his waistband. 

“Mingi’s right,” Yunho groans, attempting to disconnect your hands from him. 

“Omega,” Mingi’s voice is firm, and your hands fall away, “be still.” You’re sure you’re shaking like a leaf, and he sighs, “You need a little sleep,” 

“I can’t sleep like this,” You shake your head, “everything hurts so much,” 

“We’ll help with that,” Mingi pulls you away from Yunho’s chest, ignoring your tense whine at being pulled away from him, and slides a hand down your thigh to press your legs open, “we’ll help you sleep,” 

Yunho rests his hand on your inner thigh, bending your knee to open you up for Mingi’s hand, “Let your alphas make you feel good,” 

You’re shaking in their grip, Yunho’s hand feeling like a lead weight, and Mingi settles down low by your side so that you’re almost nose to nose, holding your gaze as his fingers gently sink into your wet folds. 

“P-please,” The sound in your throat is tight, “I need you to fuck me,” 

“Mhm,” Mingi nods, unfazed by your sudden shift in demeanor as your heat finally starts to build, “we will, but not yet,” 

You stifle a groan and turn your head away from him, tears gathering in your eyes as Mingi’s middle finger flattens out over your clit and starts to rock. All it does is stoke heat inside you and your vision blurs, the empty pocket inside you aching like never before. “Alpha,” You sob, “it’s not enough,” 

You expect Mingi to respond, but instead it’s Yunho, cupping your cheek and drawing your face towards his, “Shh,” he shakes his head, a gentle expression on his face, “we have you, sweetheart,” 

Something in his face calms you for a moment, the feeling of his warm gaze filling you and you want nothing more than to know he likes you. Approves of you. Your breath is slight, just a whisper in your throat. 

Seeing your response he slides forwards, pressing his mouth to yours in a warm, tender kiss. His hand slips down and he brushes over your gland again to keep you at ease, “Be patient for us,” he kisses you again, “and you know we’ll knot you nice and full,” 

With a desperate pant you catch his mouth again, moaning against his mouth when Mingi finally, finally sinks a finger deep inside your aching core. 

“You’re still so tight, omega,” Mingi murmurs. He pushes a second finger inside and starts to pump them in and out, and it’s not enough, nowhere near enough, but little blooms of pleasure spark up your spine and you fall back from Yunho into the bedding once more. 

“More,” You widen your legs and cant your hips, “please, Mingi, please,” 

He presses his lips to your forehead, nuzzling you softly until his mouth is close to your ear, “You’re so beautiful, omega. Did you know that?” 

A wash of pleasure crashes through you and his fingers speed up, pushing into you more firmly, his thumb catching against your clit to heighten every thrust. You moan against him, gripping hard on his shirt and jutting your hips into his hand. 

“And so good for us,” Yunho kisses your shoulder, traveling down until lips close around one of your stiff nipples. 

“Ah,” You arch into his mouth, “ah, god,” 

“Close already, omega?” Mingi teases, shaking his head despite the smile across his lips, “Are you that sensitive?” 

“D-don’t tease me,” Hot pleasure sparks up your body and your head twists back, your body tight and stiff. 

“Then come,” Mingi bites down on your earlobe gently and you whine. 

“Do as your told,” Yunho urges you, sucking hard on your nipple and pressing your leg open wider, “our sweet little omega,” 

You come so hard your brain whites out, your ears ringing and your body trembling. After an entire week of build up to your heat, and hours of feeling like your body was being stretched out long like a rubber band, snapping apart in their hands hits you so much harder than you ever could have imagined. 

Your brain reconnects when you feel Yunho’s soft blanket tucked around your naked body, and you’re too exhausted to open your eyes, but you feel them cuddle close before you drop off into sleep drowning in cedar and cinnamon. 

You have no idea what time it is when you wake again, your brain is too foggy and pained to even check the time. All you know is desperate need, all consuming emptiness and aching. When you reach out in front of you, the bed is empty and you stifle a sob. You’re alone, they’ve left you alone. You’re alone and you’re in heat, and you thought they wanted you, but all you can feel is shame. The primal part of your brain tells you that you’re not good enough, that if you had been a better omega for them they would have stayed. You’d be good and knotted by now. 

Curling into the sheets you try to push yourself up, but find the effort even harder than before. You’re soaked in sweat, trembling uncontrollably, and the throbbing pulse of your cunt is so heady that you find yourself seeking any friction at all, squeezing your thighs tight and grinding against the balled up comforter. 

You feel a body roll behind you, shifting closer, and when you hear his groggy, sleepy groan, you almost cry in relief. “A-alpha?” You can’t move too much, too it’s too painful, but you reach back for him. 

“Hey,” Yunho’s voice is a little hoarse, and it takes him a minute to realize what’s going on, but in the early morning faded light he watches the way you’re struggling. “Oh,” he breathes, “it’s really started,” 

You nod desperately, “I need help, alpha, please,” 

“Okay,” His voice drops, and he slides across the bed to slot himself perfectly behind you, “I’m going to take care of you now,” 

“Y-Yunho,” You squeeze yourself further back into him, “I’m so empty,” 

His face is above yours now, studying your expression to try and determine if this is really it, and you don’t know where Mingi is to guide the situation but at the feeling of Yunho’s body behind yours, your will to care is fading away into nothing. He’s not touching you fast enough, and with a whimper, you twist your head in the sheets, bearing your neck and submitting. 

“Oh,” Yunho’s hands tighten on you, “oh,” 

“Please,” You press again, “it hurts, alpha,” 

His cock stiffens behind you, and you almost cry in relief, rolling your hips back against him. “Fuck,” His face drops against your hair, “oh my god,” 

“Inside me,” You beg, reaching back and tugging at his shirt, “now, please,” 

He moves so much more quickly this time, pushing down his sweats and reaching between your thighs to check you, finding you soaked with slick and aching for him. You moan when you feel the press of his cockhead against your entrance, and in one fluid motion he slides home, fully seating himself inside you. 

You’re shaking in his arms, the feeling of being this full making you almost delirious with joy. Yunho doesn’t move though. He has you pulled as close as possible so that your back is flush with his chest, arms wrapped around you and keeping you perfectly still. His forehead rests against the top of your head and you can hear his shaky breath. You need him to move, to fuck you, to fill you with pups and never leave you, but he doesn’t. 

Slowly, his hips draw back just a little before sinking forward again, thrusting inside your tight channel experimentally like he’s trying to get a feel for you. Despite how your body prepared you for this, making you wet and relaxed to be able to accommodate an alpha’s knot, the feeling of his cock stretching you open is almost enough to make you come right then and there. 

He thrusts again, slowly, and you whimper against him. You need more, and fast.

Yunho groans as he holds himself deeply inside you again, caressing your body with his free hand, “You are the best thing I’ve felt in my entire life,” 

Your brain spins, pleasure flooding you and distantly you can hear yourself asking him to knot you. You’re not prepared for what he’ll feel like fucking you in earnest. 

“Is that what my girl needs?” Yunho pants, and hand locking down over your hip to help pull your body back against his hard thrusts. 

“God, please!” Your eyes close, falling apart into the sensations of him inside you. 

He groans against you, “Tell me what you need, omega,” 

The low tenor of his voice is nothing but alpha now, his instincts guiding him just as much as yours. You’re never going to last, not if he’s going to talk to you like this. With a taut moan you beg him, “Fill me up, alpha please, knot me please,” 

His hand slides up your chest, up your neck until you’re shaking with need, and closes his fingers on your jaw until he draws your face up so he can watch your eyes. His hips shift their pace, no longer driving into you with frantic need but instead firm, deep thrusts of his cock. His eyes are blown wide with desire, his mouth falling open as he watches you falling apart on his cock, “You’re all fucking mine,” 

You nod, hot tears gathering in your eyes from the overwhelming sensation and you cry out desperately for more. 

“All mine,” He repeats and surges forwards to lock his lips on yours, “you belong to me,”

“Yes!” You choke, “I’m yours, only yours,” 

“Good girl,” He angles his hips, and on the next thrust you’re spinning fast into the crest of your orgasm. With his face pressed against you, his lips at your ear, his next words snap you open. “I’ll give you perfect pups,” He pants, his knot swelling, “I’ll breed you so full,” 

There’s nothing now but the feeling of him, all encompassing as your orgasm crashes down over you, muscles spasming around his hard length. You’re a babbling mess, but so is he, so close to coming that the first sensation as your eyes reopen is his knot pressing hard at your opening. 

He’s so large already, larger than any partner or knotting dildo you’ve ever used, and you scramble a little in his hold, “Y-Yunho, I can’t,” 

“Shh,” He holds you against him, “you can, I know you can,” 

Pushing your hips down with his broad hands, he angles himself upwards until you feel the pressure of his knot pushing past your entrance and finally slipping inside you fully. It burns, your body aching to accommodate him, but with the way he’s holding you and the throb of his cock inside you, none of that matters. 

He grinds his hips desperately into you, his knot swelling further inside you, and when he comes, releasing hot with a shuddering groan, you finally feel sated. Your body melts into him, pleasantly foggy and at ease, his knot no longer uncomfortable but essential. 

You’re finally, finally full. 

It takes time for Yunho to come back to his senses, his hands still locked on your skin and breathing shaky as he tries to regulate it. You realize now that you have a little clarity that it was his first time. Deep, instinctual need had guided him, but the longer he stays quiet, the longer you wonder if you did well for him. 

After another minute or two you find his hand and lace your fingers together, “Yunho?” 

“Yes?” He murmurs from behind you, his forehead still against your hair. 

“Can you hold me please?” You murmur, squeezing his hand. 

“Come here,” He sighs, shifting slightly to spoon you properly. As he does, the knot locked inside you shifts and you make a startled hum at the sensation. He smooths your hair back and tries to get a good look at you, “Does that hurt?” 

“No,” You shake your head, adjusting so that you’re resting on his bicep, “I just feel full,” 

“Mm,” He kisses your temple, nuzzling your skin with his nose as he breathes in your scent, “you’re perfect,” 

Warmth blooms in your chest, “So are you,” 

“I want you like that again and again,” His hand slips out of yours so that he can coast it over your body, feeling your warm skin under his hands. 

“You can have me like that again and again,” You smile, “I’ll be in heat for days.” 

“Days of this,” He sighs, his hand dipping down over your hip and settling over your stomach. He inches his fingers down, passing over your sensitive nub and feeling the place where your bodies connect, locked together. 

“Does it feel good for you too?” You murmur, a little breathy as his hand slips back over your clit. 

“I’ve never felt anything like this,” He presses closer to you, “it’s incredible,” 

You chuckle, kissing his arm and relaxing further into his touch. You’re about to agree, to say more, to confess that in truth it’s your only experience in heat that so far hasn’t been terrible, but the door to the bedroom opens and Yunho tenses. 

Mingi opens the door slowly, and Yunho pulls you close, his hand closing over your stomach and his other arm wrapping around your shoulders. It’s just Mingi, but Yunho’s brain must still be fogged with the intrinsic need to protect you and in the presence of another alpha, he can’t see that it’s just his friend. 

“Mingi,” You shake your head, feeling how tense Yunho is behind you, “give him a minute,” 

“You’re okay?” He checks, staying rooted to the spot at the door, knowing that Yunho could hurt you if he stops thinking straight and tries to defend you against the imagined threat of another alpha. 

“I’m perfect,” You assure him, “I promise,” 

“Is he?” Mingi looks anxious. 

“He’s fine,” You nod, smoothing your hand across his arm to try and relieve some of his tension, “but we need some more time.” 

Mingi nods, “Come find me when you’re done,”

“We will,” 

Mingi’s eyes flick to Yunho, “Be careful with her,” 

“I got it,” Yunho’s voice sounds strained. 

Mingi nods once, and then disappears, leaving the door open, and you suspect it's so he can hear things a little better should you need him. Yunho’s muscles unlock slowly, his thumb unconsciously rubbing a steady line over your abdomen, and he exhales heavily into your hair.   

After a while, you expect his knot to have gone down, but he’s just as locked inside you as ever. The overwhelming alpha quality though has started to fade, and you rest lazily in his arms as he plays with your fingers and waits it out. 

“Does it normally take this long?” He asks finally. 

“Not usually,” You shake your head, “but it’s your first time knotting someone properly, so it might just take a little bit.” 

“I’m sorry,” He murmurs. 

“Why?” You tug him a little closer to your back, “This is exactly what I need,” 

“Everything felt right?” He pushes himself up onto one elbow so that he can look down at you a little better, propping his head in his hand. 

“Mhm,” You assure him, “Better than right,” 

He smiles, his eyes flicking over you appreciatively. 

“What about for you?” You bring him back to center, rubbing a circle into his palm with the pad of your thumb. 

“It wasn’t what I expected,” He says honestly, and your mouth drops open. “No, no,” He cups your cheek, “I meant that it was just… much more intense than I expected. I said a lot of things to you, and I don’t know, I guess I thought that type of thing was just played up in porn,” 

“Oh,” You grin, delighted a little by the way his ears run red. 

“Yeah,” He smiles, blush creeping into his cheeks now, “I just couldn’t stop myself,” 

“Mm,” You nod, “I get it, completely. This is why I wanted to talk before I was in heat,” 

“Was it too much?” He checks in. 

“No,” You assure him, “It was just what I needed to hear, and it doesn’t mean anything outside of my heat, it’s just instinct.” 

He nods and sighs, dropping back to the bed and cuddling you close again, “Good,” he murmurs, “then don’t worry about how clingy I’m about to get,” 

“You? Clingy?” You giggle against his chest, “I don’t believe it,” 

“I’m a softie,” He shrugs, “I don’t know what to tell you,” 

“But you always seem so serious at the studio,” You murmur, “and I’ve seen you go out with a lot of women,” 

“Ah,” He laughs, “well the studio is work, and I’m responsible for a lot there. And as far as the dates,” he corrects, “I am trying to appease my mother because she desperately wants me to find a wife, which I’m not really focused on right now, but she’s pretty obstinate.” 

“Such a mystery, Jeong Yunho,” You prod him lightly. 

“Not really,” He kisses your hair, sighing into you, “I’m just a guy,” 

You hum and let your eyes drift closed as he holds you. 

He yawns and sighs again, “So, forgive me if I cuddle you to death while you’re here, like I said, softie,” 

“I’m not complaining,” You sink into his touch. 

He groans a little, his knot finally softening but he stops you when you shift your hips, “Go slow, I don’t want to hurt you,” 

“It’s okay,” You assure him, feeling the way his knot fades down into being barely there. His cock starts to soften, and you slowly ease your way forwards while he shifts his hips back, disconnecting you both with a soft wet sound. 

His release floods out of you, leaving you messy and sticky, but Yunho kisses your shoulder and shifts away, “Hold tight, I’ll get a towel,” 

He seems incredibly unembarrassed about the messy state of heat sex, which you’re eternally grateful for, and within a few minutes you’re cleaned up and dressed again in yet another pair of clean underwear and one of the largest shirts of Mingi’s that you’ve ever seen. 

“How are you feeling?” Yunho asks as you finish cleaning your face up in the mirror of Mingi’s bathroom.

“A little sore,” You tell him honestly, “and cramping a little again, but it’s not too bad yet.” 

“You want to come see Mingi then? Get out of this room for a minute?” He brushes his fingers down your back as he watches you in the mirror. 

“Perfect,” 

In the living room, Mingi is waiting. He’s pouring over with nervous energy, his leg bouncing and his fingers fidgeting with his phone, refreshing his social media feed over and over again. The television is on, but he’s clearly not watching, and instead you see him perk up at the first sounds of you emerging from the bedroom. 

“Hey,” He twists around on the couch, looking a little relieved when he sees you completely fine and cleaned up wearing one of his t-shirts. 

“Hey,” You smile, moving towards the couch, “can I sit?” 

“Of course,” He gestures towards the couch, but that’s not exactly what you meant. The sight of him waiting for you, and the palpable taste of his anxiety in the air makes you feel needed, and you push his arms open to settle in his lap. 

“Oh,” He adjusts his legs to give you a better seat and winds his arm around your back, “is everything okay?” 

“Mhm,” You take his hand, rubbing your thumb gently over the gland in his wrist to soothe him, “you can relax, I’m perfectly fine,” 

Yunho takes a seat on the opposite end of the couch, chewing the inside of his cheek as he watches you and Mingi together. With a nudge to his friend’s thigh he gets Mingi’s attention and shakes his head, “I’m sorry I snapped at you,” 

“It’s cool,” Mingi shrugs, “I know the feeling.” 

“Where did you go, anyways?” You ask, leaning into his chest. The familiarity between the three of you should feel strange, before last night you really were only coworkers to each other. You might have even become friends, but now you’ve pushed so far past that you don’t know what you are except to accept that their hands on your skin feels right. 

“I shouldn’t have left, I could feel you were getting restless,” he explains, “I went to make you some broth and get cold water, just putting a few things together, but by the time I got back you were both in it,” 

“Ah,” You blush looking down at your hands, “sorry,” 

“Don’t be sorry,” Mingi’s broad, warm hand rests on your bare thigh and gives you a subtle squeeze, “I’m glad Yunho could help. I just didn’t think it would be smart to interrupt you,” 

“Good thinking,” Yunho adds, running a hand over his face and sighing, “you were right,” 

“I told you,” Mingi nods, “it can be intense,” 

Yunho passes a hand over your shin before pushing himself back up to stand and he stretches long and tall before groaning, “Alright, I’m starving.” 

You clap a hand over your mouth, chuckling into your palm, “Classic,” 

“Can I make you something?” He asks, “Either of you?” 

Mingi shakes his head, “I’m good,” 

“Me too,” You agree, “I should be hungry, but I’m really not,” 

Mingi’s nose crinkles, “You should still eat,” 

“Maybe in a bit,” You try to appease him. 

“In a bit you’ll be jumping our bones again,” Mingi counters. 

“I know,” You sigh, “but really, I’m okay. I feel pretty good,” 

“This is really just because it’s day one right?” Yunho asks, a little less joking than before. 

“Yeah,” You nod, “day one and two are never as bad, and you definitely have more lucidity as long as you’re managing the spikes well. Day three, four, and sometimes five if it lasts that long, are usually a lot harder.” 

“How much is a lot?” Yunho asks, stepping close and running his hand over your hair, “You were already in a lot of pain,” 

“I’ll be less coherent, and the fever can be worse. I probably won’t have down time like this,” You explain, “the pain isn’t necessarily worse, it’s just more consistent,” 

He frowns, “Then you’re eating now,” 

You sigh heavily and shake your head, “Honestly, you don’t need to, I can make myself something in a bit or,” 

Mingi cuts you off and makes a dismissive noise with his tongue against his teeth, “y/n, relax. This is what we meant when we said we’d help you through your heat. It’s more than just orgasms and knots,” 

You swallow back your words, holding his gaze. 

“Alphas are meant to provide,” He reminds you, “so let us,” 

A flutter of warmth bubbles through you, and you can only nod, no use arguing now when your mind is spinning and telling you to accept. Yunho drops a quick kiss on the top of your head, before disappearing into the kitchen. You’ve never had an alpha provide, never once. In your limited experience before going on suppressants, you were used to being knotted incredibly quickly and then left alone, or having a partner that never really knew how to fully satisfy, leaving you to feverishly deal with your needs while they slept. You’ve never experienced a heat where you felt wanted before. 

You ease into Mingi’s chest, resting a head on his shoulder and letting your muscles relax for as long as you can. They make you food, massage your sore hips, and keep you distracted with stories and memories from before your time at the studio. They hold you close, and they ease your pain, they provide.

[sanspuppet]

it'd be so funny if u wrote a fic where u tap on the tip of woos dick as if it was a mic while saying "is this thing on?"

OK SO I HAD THIS STUCK IN MY HEAD THE ENTIRE DAY-

- nsfw content (18+)

W/T: oral sex, handjob (both giving), swearing

• not proofread so sorry any mistakes

A/O: still kinda sick but i don't want you to wait longer, also im being very slow at writing lately i dunno why :/ im currently working on another req and the maknae line of the imagine "ateez when you fuck then for the first time" so yeah i have a lot to work on

ㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡ

"fuuuck y/n- please-" Wooyoung throws his head back, looking at the ceiling to concentrate only on the feeling of your hands grabbing his cock. He squeezes his eyes, his fingers tightening the fabric of the sheets. Pathetic hushed whimpers keep leaving his mouth as you rub your thumb at the base of his length, joyfully watching Woo getting desperate for more touch. A minimal contact between you and his crotch made him insanely impatient to have you work up his dick, as good as you always did: by now you had pleasured him hundreds of times, that you perfectly know which spots have Woo twitching under your touch. You giggle when you hike your hand up his length and jokingly tap the tip of it, bringing your face closer and banter right in front of his cockhead: "is thing on?" like it's a mic, your mic, you own it, using it however and whenever you want. He immediately replies with a high pitched moan: "Ah- yes! fuck it's turned on-" his voice tone is getting noticeably yearning especially when you start to slam repeatedly his tip on your lips. Without even warning him, you suddenly move your head down his pelvis, taking his cock fully down your throat, squeezing it with your lips while your tongue tries to get it even wetter. As if it wasn't enough for getting Woo's mind completely foggy, totally addicted to how warm and tight your mouth feels, you drag your hand down his balls, palming and massaging them carefully as you raise your head to lick only his tip. "Oh shit- i'm close- so fucking close-" you instinctively move your palm on his length and start to stroke it quickly, giving him the perfect last friction that could get him over the edge, to his climax, giving him another enchanting orgasm. "Yes babe, come on..." you attach your lips to his cockhead another time "... cum on my face, paint me good" he's now a whimpers and moans mess, the pleasure's dazzling his mind that the only thing he can do about is praising you and begging you to don't stop. You can't do anything but giggling mischievously while speeding your pace up and watch joyfully how his dick keeps swirling and twisting under your gaze. And then, it happens. Ropes of cum shooting right at your face, drops and drops falling down your chin, licking away what lands on your lips. You looked at him intensely, like you'd want to devour him countless of times. "Being so nice for me Woo, but we're not done yet, you know it, right?"

[pitchsidestories]

Alex Scott's daughter (1) II Leah Williamson x Reader

"Our song is the slamming screen door Sneakin' out late, tapping on your window When we're on the phone, and you talk real slow 'Cause it's late, and your mama don't know." ~ Taylor Swift, Our Song

part 2 I arsenal women masterlist I word count: 1747

Being the daughter of Alex Scott was significantly different to having any other mum. Not only had football a very important part in both of your lives, but you also were much closer than other families were. Alex had gotten pregnant with you when she was only seventeen, struggling to balance being a young mum and finding her way into a football career. You two basically grew up side by side, with the same people and on football fields all across the country. Often, you felt more like sisters than mum and daughter.

Now you were twenty-one sitting on the sofa and watching your mum slip on some heels while simultaneously putting in her earrings. “Are you sure you don’t want to come with me to this party?“, she asked for the hundredth time now.

You rolled your eyes with an amused smile; “Yes, I’ll be fine at home with my book and a hot chocolate, Mum.“ “Okay, fine. I won’t ask anymore. But you’re going to miss out.“, she warned you, holding up a finger in your direction. Satisfied, you nodded once; “Thank you and no, I don’t think I will.“

Your mum shrugged into her coat and walked over to give you a kiss on the crown of your head: “See you later. I won’t come home too late.“ You closed your book carefully, keeping one finger between the pages as a bookmark and raised an eyebrow at your mum; “We’ll see about that. If a certain redhead is there, I’m sure it will take longer.“ You knew your mum loved parties. Especially when her new crush was likely to show up.

Alex just waved your comment off; “Oh shut up. She won’t be there.“ “If you say so…“, you stated before returning to your book. “Hey, I’m not just saying it, I know it.“, your mum continued. “Mum, you need to hurry up or you’ll be late.“, you reminded her, pointing at the clock in your living room.

Hesitant the former player started to laugh:” Yeah, fine. Why do you want to get me out of the house so quickly?” “I don’t.”, you replied flushing. Despite her feeling that something was off in the way you tried to make her leave, she said: “I’ll see you later.” “Bye, I love you.”, you shouted as Alex was already at the door. With a huge smile she turned her head towards you before stepping out of her home:” Love you, too.”

A couple of minutes after your mum left the door ringed. A bright grin was on your lips as you opened the door for your girlfriend: ”Lee, come inside.” “Hi.”, Leah smiled. A loud sigh escaped your mouth:“ Hey, sorry, I thought she’d never leave.” “Couldn’t say goodbye, huh?”, the blonde threw her eyebrows up in amusement.  “Nope.” The defender admitted:“ That’s kind of cute.” “So, any plans four this evening?”, you winked at her.

In a casual tone the older woman answered:” No, I thought I’d just come over and we’ll see what we’ll do.” “Sounds good to me.” An innocent smile was showing up on Leah’s face while she showed you what the Arsenal player was hiding in her bag:” I even brought my book if you prefer to read together.” “Like in a reading date? I love that. Do you want a hot chocolate, or I think we do have a bottle of red somewhere if you prefer that.”, you informed her about the options.  “Oh, I don’t mind. I’m just here to spend time with you.” Time together, was something you rarely had, especially with the busy calendar your girlfriend had even with her ACL injury.

So you decided on the following evening plan:” Okay, let’s spend our time with reading so your physio can’t complain about the fact that you don’t rest enough.”  

“I’ve rested enough.”, Leah protested before she was lifting you up carrying you in the direction to your bedroom. Giggling you pleaded: “Lee, let me down.” Although you knew all too well about the England’s captain stubbornness. Determined the blonde shook her head: “No.” “Sofa or bed?”, you questioned her. “To read on?” “Yes.”, you nodded.

“Bed.“, Leah decided quickly. You nodded in agreement of her decision; “Good choice.“ “I know.“, the defender grinned back while following you into your bedroom. With a sigh, she let herself fall onto your bed. You immediately followed suit. With your head propped up on one arm, you opened your book; “Want me to read out loud to you?“ “Sure, why not?“, Leah agreed and turned around to put her own book on the nightstand. As you started reading, she drew her attention back to you.

However, this did not last long. You could feel her fingertips on the outside of your thigh tracing small patterns and then slowly wandering higher and under your shirt. In feigned annoyance, you slapped her hand away; “Hey!“ “What?“ Her blue eyes met yours with pure innocence. “You’re not listening.“, you scolded her. Leah shook her head in denial; “No.“ You shot her an amused look which Leah took as an invite to kiss you and finally, you gave in.

The book dropped from the side of the bed as you passionately kissed her back, running your fingers through her long blonde hair. “Now I know why you didn’t finished The Cost of Living yet even though it’s only 200 pages.“, you laughed between two kisses. Your girlfriend rolled eyes as answer and pressed her lips on yours again. You two were so absorbed in each other that neither of you heard the front door open and close. “Honey, I’m home.“, Alex’ voice echoed through the hallway.

In surprise, you two immediately drove apart but at the same moment, the door to your bedroom opened. Alex stood in the door frame, watching the scene before yelling out; “What the hell?“ “Oh shit. Alex, I can explain.“, Leah replied. She got up from the bed and took a few steps towards her friend. Your mum refused to hear any of it, looking from you to Leah with in an expression of betrayal; “No. That’s my daughter you kissed there, Leah!“ “Alex…“ Your mum turned back to you; “And you? Leah is one of my best friends!“ “Mum…“, you whispered, looking down at your hands because you could not stand to look at the hurt in her face.

“Can I talk to you for a moment, Alex?”, the blonde pleaded. Sternly Alex shovelled one of her closest friends out of the room:” For how long this has been going on, Leah?!” “Not long. Really. We just didn’t find the right time to tell you yet.”, Leah confessed. Out of breath Alex lips escaped an: “Oh wow.” “Don’t be mad at her. I started it.”, the younger woman told her, the softness in her words when she mentioned her daughter startled the older one. Devastated the former Arsenal player shouted: “You? When? How? Why?” “Because your daughter is cute.”, Leah said trying not to hurt her best friend any further while staying honest about her feelings.

Furious Alex looked at her:” I know she’s very cute!” “Alex.” Angrily the ex-defender waved with her hands:” What?!” “Calm down.”, the blonde asked her to. “So you started it?” “I did.”, the England skipper nodded earnest. “Are you serious with her? If not I swear-“, Alex began.  Without any hesitation Leah stated firmly:“ Alex, you know me. I don’t date unless I mean it.” Groaning the BBC reporter hid her face in her hands:” I know and I even told you recently you need to let someone in your heart again, that you’re ready to love again.” “And I am.”, the Arsenal player confirmed. “With her?” “Yes.”, the blonde affirmed.

Carefully you reached out to the brunette: “Mum?” “I’m fine. Sorry, I’m just being dramatic it’s what I do.”, Alex apologized.  A mild but also tired smile appeared on Leah’s face:“Only when it comes to her.”  “True.”, her friend admitted while putting the arms around her daughter into a tight hug. Quietly you said:” But mum I’m not a kid anymore.”  “I know that.”, your mum mumbled into your ear. “But?” “It’s Leah. And you. I’ve to get used to that first.”, the brunette revealed. You let out a sigh of reveal:” That’s okay, we respect that.” “You should leave now Leah.”, Alex told the younger woman. The blonde went to you and pressed a kiss on top of your head:” Oh okay, good night you two. See you both soon.”

You share on last look with Leah; “Night, Lee.“ “Good Night.“, Alex answered curtly and closed the door behind the blonde defender. Your mum turned back to you but didn’t say anything. “How was the event, Mum?“, you finally decided to break the silence. “I don’t want to talk about that right now.“, she shook her head earnestly. You bit your lip, trying to avoid the elephant in the room; “What do you want to talk about?“ “You.“, Alex replied simply. With a sigh you agreed; “Alright.“ Slowly, you sat back down on your bed.

Your mum was still looking at you with her arms crossed in front of her chest but her facial expression has relaxed a bit; “So? When did you want to tell me?“ “Soon, really.“ Alex raised an eyebrow and repeated sceptically; “Soon?“ “Yes?“ Unconvinced, she shook her head; “I don’t believe you that.“ “I’m really happy with her.“, you stated, tired of discussing with your mum.

Finally, she seemed to soften up and sat down next to you; “You really are, huh?“ “Yeah.“ “I can tell.“ You carefully tried to find her eyes; “You’ll get used to it, right?“ “I think I will.“, she answered, a smile tugging on her lips. You nodded gratefully in her direction: “Thank you.“

“Hey?“, she asked and nudged you with her shoulder. “Huh?“, you looked up in surprise. Your mum winked at you; “I don’t want to know anything about what you two are doing together, okay?“ Perplexed, you could not stop yourself from laughing; “Okay.“

After a moment of silence, Alex cleared her throat; “I’m sorry I send her away for tonight.“ “Don’t worry about it.“ Gently, she slapped you on your thigh as she got up from your bed; “Let’s order some food and you tell me about you two? How does that sound?“ A big smile on your face, you followed her; “That sounds great, Mum.“