#what a coinkydink right?

[desertsiren]

starter for: @r3m3mb3r-m3-n0t​​

Ollie had gotten this suit early on in his residency in Vegas, and to his understanding it was one of the things appropriate to wear to the celebration of a life. Observation of the city’s nightlife also implied it was acceptable attire for the later event, so he was quite pleased to be able to wear it. The shoes however, were a pain in the ass and he couldn’t wait until he’d be able to take them off at the end of the night. 

In any case, this didn’t seem to be the type of event that people would be later to, so he’d left a bit earlier than necessary. It had turned out to be a good choice as he found himself distracted by side streets along the new path. New people, new sounds, new shops, and only a single hungry siren by himself. He would be lying if he said he wasn’t tempted to snag a bite on the way, but Ollie knew better than anyone just how messy the whole ordeal would be - and he needed to be presentable!

So he’d skated his eyes past each curious face and continued his walk to what promised to be an interesting night. The call of his name in an unfamiliar voice broke his train of thoughtlessness and he paused to crane his head around for the source. Only one person was actually looking at him, so he turned with a smile and made his way over. “What a surprise,” he crooned as he racked his brain for a name to match the face. “What are you doing here?”

[felikatze]

THE ISLANDER EUPHRASIE THEORY: THE CRACK HEADCANON THAT RUINED ME FOREVER

HI. you might know me as the kingphie divorce guy. or as the guy who wrote the 6k ludonarrative essay. Today i am going to introduce to YOU @the-bitter-ocean's fantabulous ISLANDER EUPHRASIE THEORY!!!

DISCLAIMER

This post contains SPOILERS for ALL of In Stars and Time. INCLUDING THE ACT 6 SECRET!!

You have been warned.

ALSO!!!!

The original headcanon/theory is VERY MUCH Ocean's fantastic work! I am merely rehashing all the arguments for it that have been laid out across various chats into one cohesive thing people can look at. Also citations! Who doesn't love those.

WHAT IS IT?

Well, it's quite simple. It's the theory that Euphrasie, love of my life and Head Housemaiden of Dormont, is from the forgotten island, same as Siffrin and the King.

(Yes, this is why divorce AU exists.)

WHY DO YOU EVEN BELIEVE THIS?

Quite a lot of reasons, actually.

It's really funny

Let us begin with: the basics.

SUPERFLOUS AESTHETIC DETAIL

HAIR COLOR

This is Euphrasie. She's very pretty. I love her.

You might notice several things about her, like her fantabulous white hair.

Well. What other characters have white hair?

You have guessed correctly. The ONLY OTHER white haired characters with actual artwork are Siffrin and the King, both from The Island The World Forgot. Thus we can assume that it's a typical hair color for islanders. Makes it stand out very much that Euphie also has it.

(What about the beautiful one- sh sh sh he's blonde. He's blonde.) (Well, actually, considering that they are the only one who acknowledges that Vaugardians are also weird, what if he's from the island as well? Checkmate atheists.)

EYELASHES

(EDIT!!!!! FINALLY PUTTING THIS ON THE MAIN POST!!!

Turns out I was incorrect in this. Some characters (Mira, Isa) also have eyelashes on SOME portraits. The mentioned chars r still notable for Always Having Em, + the Loop lashes are like, literally intended as plot twist foreshadowing, but, hey.

That's what you get for writing essays at 1am.

IN RETURN!!! Someone pointed out to me [i forgot who sorry] that Euphrasie's capelet.... has stars on it!! It's speckled like the starry sky!! Now isn't that a neat coinkydink.)

(Original text left up because I respect my past self's artistic vision. And his lunacy.)

Correct. Eyelashes.

Going back to our portrait of Euphie, she is drawn with precisely three eyelashes. Why is this notable? Because Siffrin and Loop are.

So much so, that being drawn with three eyelashes, is specifically an element of foreshadowing to Loop's true identity.

(squints at character portraits) literally no characters besides Siffrin, Loop, and Euphrasie have eyelashes? Oh my god. What? Nobody has eyelashes? What the fuck? (okay, some moments later: Mirabelle has eyelashes in some battle artwork, but these three are the only ones specifically with eyelashes in dialogue portraits, which is still incredibly odd.)

SPEAKING HABITS

(EDIT!!! Another Point that is Kind Of Off, in that other characters [e.g. Odile] also do this occasionally. Again, keeping the text for my creative vision.

In return I get to inform you that the King makes the "not so bright, Bright One" pun TWICE in different loops, thus implying the King likes puns. Take this as you will. That's been my psychic damage, buhbyeeee~)

Hey, so, you know when you talk to people in Dormont, a lot of the NPCS will have a nametag that just says "[something] One" right? Daydreaming One, Castle-Loving One, Beautiful One?

And I've seen people wonder, are these titles? Nicknames?

And I bring you this: Siffrin addresses these people with these epithets in his head, because they have no fucking clue what anyone's name is.

So Siffrin just naturally lapses into this style of nicknaming strangers.

Which two other people also do.

Bright one... ...... Do you remember? Traveling one! Are you done talking with your companions? Yes, wonderful, wonderful!

Funny little tidbit that these three characters all speak alike isn't it :)

Okay. With aesthetics out of the way, let's move onto the next tier of this iceberg:

THE MECHANICS OF FORGETTING AND BEING FORGOTTEN

I realize in the process of writing that we must outline the nature of the curse. What gets forgotten and what gets to stay?

The particularity that's important to us right now is: what people get forgotten?

All evidence points toward this: an entire person is only forgotten if they were physically present on the island when it vanished.

I'm pulling up two example cases to prove it: Siffrin and the Daydreaming One.

The thing with Siffrin is: we know he witnessed the exact moment the island vanished. And, very notably, Siffrin was in a boat.

You can get the dialogue that proves this only in ACT 2 in a secret room most people don't find on their first playthroughs, which is both very funny and very evil. Here's the dialogue.

Siffrin: "I ran away from home once!" [...] Siffrin: "And so I took our boat! Got to the beach, rowed away from the shore a bit. I was going to come back right away, I just wanted to scare my parents a bit!" [...]

Siffrin: "I started to row back towards the shore... And then, I... I... ..." Isabeau: ... Sif? Siffrin: (Woah! What?) "Um, yes?" Isabeau: Um... You were telling us how you ran away from home? Siffrin: "I... was?" Odile: You... Were. Bonnie: DID YOU FORGET WHAT YOU WERE TALKING ABOUT WHILE TALKING ABOUT IT?!?

Siffrin is from the island, but was not physically present when it disappeared. This resulted in Siffrin forgetting their entire identity, including given name and spoken/written language.

Additionally, this is confirmed via Word of God to be the exact moment the island disappeared, so here's proof I'm not reading into it:

Shoutout to bibliomaniac's insane google spreadsheet for the easily searchable screenshot. god bless. Brinny, ily.

On the other hand, with the Daydreaming One, we have proof of a person who is not originally from the island, but was physically on it at the time of disappearance.

Siffrin: "Don't you have a sister?" Daydreaming One: I... I don't? I just said I'm an only child, silly!

(For her to forget someone like her sister, so easily... Her sister must've traveled to...)

Secondly, we know that remnants of the island were not completely forgotten immediately.

Memory faded gradually, starting with the ability to still speak and think about it with accompanying headaches, until it ramped up in intensity and everything is simply gone.

The Sparkling Diary in the library is more or less proof. Memory of the island was gone, but... people still remembered that they forgot something. People still knew what they were talking about, (an island north of Vaugarde), just without the specifics.

"Urgh. Also, Dad noticed no one can say the name of the island north of here anymore?" "I tried to say it yesterday and I got like the WEIRDEST headache for HOURS."

And Odile also remarks the following

Odile: We also know that people could remember that country clearly, before.

This will be relevant later. Moving on.

CONTRIVANCES

THE HOUSE'S OBSERVATORY

SO. The House of Change of Dormont has this funny little room on the third floor. It's an observatory. To look at stars with. When entering this room for the first time, Mirabelle says this:

Mirabelle: What...? Was there a room like this in the House? Y-yeah, I remember! Someone was working here... Studying... They looked like... ... Um... Sorry, I can't remember.

This reveals to us several things:

This room is innate to the House, and not brought here by the King's weird redecorating

Someone from the House was using it for study

All memory of who or what was studying and being studied was erased alongside the island's existence

Of course we can say, "yo, what if Euphrasie was using this room and just forgot?" but that is. a headcanon. I ADMIT! It is a stipulation

However, I find the general presence of the Island written all over the House incredibly interesting.

Inside the Observatory, there's a pile of papers with messy handwriting. You can't read these in until ACT 4. Even in ACT 4, you can't read them. But you do learn what's written on them.

(A pile of papers.) (It looks like someone was trying to write your country's name.)

Inside the observatory is also a globe. Upon repeated interaction in... act 4, i think, you get this:

(You see a spot on the globe where the paint has started wearing out, like someone kept dragging their finger on it.) (You drag your finger there too.) (Erased. You almost want to look for lightless paint.)

BOOKS

During the various quests to discover the truth of the loops, you run into a lot of books, written in the forgotten language. Now, Dormont is not close to the island. Dormont is not close to the coast.

Bambouche is. That's why Bonnie has heard about the island before and knows it was a big deal - they lived really close to it.

Bonnie (and then1): I think, I think my village was really close to it!!! My sister said it was all everyone could talk about for weeks!!! Mirabelle (anxious1): That's so frightening... I'm glad that whatever happened, she didn't get caught up in it!

As we can see in this map, Dormont is in the southern half of the country, and very centrally at that, meaning it has basically maximum distance from all waters and ports. So why does this landlocked small town have so many books in this language?

These aren't just dry books, either. In Dormont's library, there's actually a translated version of volume 2 of The Cursing of Chateau Castle.

(You take the book out again.) (You can read its title, now...) (Your heart is beating, badump, badump, badump.) (It's...) (... A translated copy of "The Cursing of Château Castle", issue #2.) (You start laughing.)

CONCLUSION OF THIS SECTION

Islanders lived in Dormont. Maybe even multiple! We've established that whoever is in Dormont when it vanished would not simply disapper, instead

they forgot where they're from.

One day, the islanders in Dormont could no longer remember being anywhere but Dormont. Being anything but Vaugardian. The observatory fell into disuse, as the person studying there gradually forgot what they used it for, even as they desparately tried to hold onto it, boring holes into the globe, and scribbling its name over and over until its unintelligible.

And, in all likelihood, eventually that knowledge was just gone forever. They simply became part of Dormont, none the wiser to their own history.

Books slipped into cracks. Rooms fell into disuse. Nobody remembered to clean out the remnants.

Now. The real cinch of this.

Why, in particular, do I think Euphrasie is one of them?

Answer me this, then.

How does Euphie know what Wish Craft is?

1. How could she read it?

Euphrasie knew specifically that Wish Craft exists, when all books on it are written in a language nobody can read.

The book in the storage room? The diary in the room behind the star door? The book in the secret library? None of them are legible.

There are no legible records of Wish Craft.

2. What about the Favor Tree?

Euphrasie knew specifically that Wish Craft is related to the Favor Tree. It's also a Vaugardian practice to make requests of the Favor Tree, but they're just that - requests. Nobody thinks they actually have power.

Only Euphrasie does. She thinks it's the key to defeating the King.

(This is... A list of people who wished to save Vaugarde!!!) (You look around her desk, trying to find out more.) (Why would she record the people who wished to save Vaugarde?) (... There!!!) (It's a little notebook, jammed between random boring paperwork...) (In it, the Head Housemaiden talks about Wish Craft... How in the days before the King attacked, she noticed everyone was wishing to the Favor Tree for the same thing:) (To save Vaugarde.) (And she started wondering if this wish could be the key to the King's defeat, somehow...) (So the Head Housemaiden knew about Wish Craft!!!)

Except, when Isabeau talks about it...

Isabeau: Well, it's just a random big tree. But when you're a believer of the House of Change, the biggest tree in a certain place is called a Favor Tree! It's like, it’s the tree with the most power, so you can ask it things? As a favor?

He struggles a little to explain it. Almost, as though the tradition came from some other culture, imported into Vaugarde, and no one can definetely remember where it came from.

To note, here, is that the Favor Tree is hugely associated with Loop, and wishes in general. Wishing on a Favor Tree is such a hugely powerful ritual when executed correctly, that it caused the entire timeloops.

And I'm not even gonna break out citations to prove that Wish Craft is associated with the island. Come on. You know that. You played the game. It's required to beat the game.

If you haven't beaten the game, what the fuck are you doing here. Go back and play it, baka.

3. Something's breaking, failing, rotting

At the end of ACT 4, when Siffrin confronts Euphrasie about her knowledge of Wish Craft, Euphrasie is distinctly aware of this: the people of Vaugarde are wishing wrong.

It's true. All of Vaugarde wished to the Favor Tree, wished for us to be saved. We wished for a savior. A way for us to win against the King. And Wish Craft gave us the means to do it, didn't it? Made sure it'd work? [...] But... But something went wrong, didn't it? Something goes wrong, every time!!! [...] The only answer I can find... Is it's because we did it wrong. I don't know what happened But we must've done it wrong!!! None of us in Vaugarde knew the exact ritual, but-- But we must have done it so wrong, it broke, and it doesn't answer to us at all anymore!!! [...] I don't know, I don't know, I don't know!!!

There's only one person who knew how to make a Wish correctly. And he made it by sheer instinct. Something they could not place even if they tried. Just... a forgotten ritual, dredged back up by muscle memory. Something he's probably been doing since he's a little kid, something that's so backed into their habits they use Wish Craft to carve figurines out of wood.

To end, I leave you with this. Dialogue you get when you try to talk to Euphrasie again, before you talked to everybody else.

If you talk to me... REALLY talk to me... It's all over. What "it" is, I have no idea... I know... I can feel that... I couldn't change whatever comes next, even if I wanted to. But I know it is the will of the Change God. Or, no, perhaps... The will of something even bigger... ... Something will end, once you talk to me.

There is a way for Euphrasie to know all of this. To know Wish Craft exists, to be aware she's doing it wrong, but not knowing, remembering quite enough to get it right.

If she knew it all beforehand already.

[hitlikehammers]

Steddie Missed Connection AU

feat. Craigslist-trawling-wingwoman!Robin + earnest-LA-transplant!Steve + rockstar!Eddie ✨ inspired by this actual Craigslist love story

It’s always about a 50/50 shot when Robin starts making her little back-of-the-throat squealing noises. Up to a certain pitch, Steve could pretend he had his AirPods on noise cancellation mode.

Once she reached fire-alarm-screeching levels, it overrode the settings and boom: he lost his fall guy.

Thanks, Apple.

But that’s where they are, and the squealing plus the screen in her hands, plus the way her leg’s bouncing against the table they’re both sitting at—which would have overrrode Steve’s AirPod excuse in about a minute because she’s gonna start splashing his glass of orange juice in a hot second—but all of it lumped together?

He’s lucky he’s retained his athletic reflexes post-high school—maybe only because of being joined-at-the-hip with this particular platonic soulmate, really—because by the time she’s swinging her iPad from its case to plop right down in front of him?

At least he’s quick enough to save his overnight oats from becoming aluminum-flavored when she drops the goddamn thing down without warning—caseless, the heathen—and makes indecipherable noises Steve thinks he’s maybe only heard at the zoo as she taps her nail with an migraine-inducing click on the screen.

Steve…supposes this means he’s obligated to look.

He sighs, fully expecting a dumb meme or a ‘cute TikTok’ because he knows who he fucking lives with; he reaches across the table and unfolds his glasses—really, assaulting him with this before he can even get his contacts in…

And it’s a…webpage. Like: just a webpage. A boring webpage, even. Definitely not matching up with the…squealing and table-sized earthquake of bouncing knees. He squints, tries to make it make sense.

Oh. Wow. He didn’t…

Steve did not actually know Craigslist still existed, let alone that people still used it. He was pretty sure the things for sale were always just kidnapping plots with extra steps, and then also that finding a person you walked past that one time was an FYP problem to solve. But.

Here, in front of him, in black and white and honestly like no other color:

Steve squints; it was posted this morning, but only just. Like 4am. So the last afternoon for there to be a one o’clock hour was—

Yesterday.

His yesterday was uneventful. Went shopping with Robs. Filled up the freezer and overbought shit again so they had a kind of massive and wholly mismatched dinner with the leftovers nearly popping open the fridge door. Can’t take the Midwesterner out of the man or woman, apparently.

Definitely nothing like the day this poor soul on a maybe-less-dead-than-presumed website had had. But Steve won’t pretend his heart doesn’t clench a little when he finishes reading because…it’s cheesy.

But Steve’s always been into that romantic…stuff.

“That’s very sweet,” he lands on commenting before passing the tablet back to Robin, who’s staring at him with frankly terrifying eyes. Like: lost-your-fucking-mind eyes.

“Steven.”

“What?”

“Steven.”

“Robin.”

He won’t even pretend he doesn’t jump with the metal slams on the wood where Robin narrowly misses flipping his bowl of sadly-abandoned oats with her iPad again when she slaps it down in from of him and points frantically yet again.

“Look at the location.”

Steve tilts his head.

Oh. He’d just looked at the time. And it’s not like the location in the title was…unique on its own.

“Huh,” he huffs with a shrug when he sees their part of the city listed in the main link up top. “Coinkydink.”

Robin’s growl starts deep, like a diaphragmatic thrum and Steve would be terrified of her if she were anyone else.

As it is: he’s only mildly unsettled. Specifically because the growl rumbles so…long.

Like at least a minute before she screams bloody fucking murder:

“My hair was in the buns!”

And the way she screeches it, and the maniacal twitch of those eyes…she’s saying more than those words, with those words.

Which means Steve has to put in effort to follow her coded message style of communicating, fucking hell. He hasn’t even eaten his breakfast.

He tries to think it through, at least manages to down his glass of OJ so it can’t be a sacrifice to flying iPads when he thinks he…

“Wait.”

Steve frowns. Robin just blinks.

“You don’t,” he shakes his head, or starts to, it’s a slow motion thing; “you don’t like honestly think,” but even as he’s saying it, the look in her eyes starts to make sense, and answers for him:

“This is not about me.”

Because: seriously.

“We were laughing!” Robin is immediate with her rebuttal, still in her screeching era. “No one else was there!”

“Because we specifically time our shopping for when people are at lunch on a weekday,” Steve counters quick, tries to cut her off at the pass; “a statistically slow window of opportunity for us to debate the list!”

“We write the list to avoid debating,” Robin answers in a more sedate, be reasonable now, dingus tone before she shakes her head and scowls and:

“Stop distracting me!”

Yep, back to the screeching.

“Why were you even on that fucking site?” Steve sighs as he crosses his arms and leans back in his chair.

“Steven,” Robin says again in that fucking tone that always means he’s missing the biggest, far-more-important point but does jack shit to help him find it.

“Robina.”

“Not my name, eww.”

“Well, now you know how I feel when you make up a middle name for me,” Steve sticks his tongue out very maturely to her scrunched up face: “they’re never even nice ones,” he adds, because they’re really not; “and I do know that was your next move so,” he smacks his hands opposite the screen on the table in front of him in victory as he crows:

“Denied.”

“This isn’t basketball,” Robin’s working her tongue around her lips inside her mouth, which is always deadly foreshadowing; “you didn’t block my shot or whatever—“

“Didn’t I?” Steve pushes because, well, one, he did, and two, the original conversation was absurd even for them.

“Maybe it was so empty because his security was there.”

Steve frowns. The tone’s too…even. No. No: too haughty.

“The fuck does that mean?”

“I said he looked like a rockstar,” she leans to grab back her tablet and poke near the top, obviously switching browser tabs: “so I did some digging.”

“Robin, what city do we live in?” Steve asks as she works, because yes, Steve remembers seeing a very hot fucking dude staring less in their direction than looking dumbstruck-lost as hell, and he’d considered walking over to ask if he needed help—Midwestern transplant to the bone—which was accompanied by the stray I’d fuck that gorgeous toothpick silly, but in the paper product aisle, like on the 48-count pack of Charmin, he looks soft under all that leather—then both thoughts were swiftly abandoned when the toothpick’s eyes met Steve’s and Steve maybe had to force himself to finish laughing at a joke he can’t remember now, that Robin told, because his skin felt like it was burning a little except the sun had poked behind a cloud, and his throat, it had like, it had just, it—

It just felt…weird.

He does remember that.

“But we don’t see rockstars every day,” which is fair, their neighborhood in particular is less music biz than others.

“Plus, look at this!”

Then she’s shoving the iPad back in front of Steve: it’s a TMZ shot or some other pap photo that’s more than half blur. It is indeed the parking lot at their Costco. And it does…feature a toothpick-esque figure looking similar to the one Steve remembers, but it’s more from the back than the side. And like, anyone can wear that much black in the summer. It’s a free country.

“And look at him!”

She split-screens to a Wikipedia article about a band even Steve’s heard of, if not for listening to them himself. It…he glances at the paparazzi shot.

Lead guitarist of Corroded Coffin Sighted Getting Groceries Just Like Normal People in Mar—

And then he looks back to the wiki: okay. Same band name. The guy with the guitar in the photo looks…

He has the same hair.

“Don’t tell me it’s just coincidence.”

Steve rolls his eyes.

“It is just coincidence.”

“Steve.”

Steve feels his face sour.

“I know that tone,” because he does. It never leads to things he enjoys.

“You’ve thought about him.”

“He was gorgeous,” Steve thinks he surprises her with his honesty but like, what does he have to gain by lying? Plus:

“LA’s is like the plastic surgery capital of the fucking world, it’d be kinda sad if a lot of people generally weren’t pretty.”

“He wasn’t that kind of pretty.”

And fuck if they don’t share a brain cell; fuck if she doesn’t see right through him.

“And that’s not why you’ve been thinking about him.”

And fuck if she doesn’t know Steve, far too well.

“I never once said I’d been thinking about,” he hears the words and knows they’re weak, goddamnit.

“You never had to,” Robin smiles a little and taps an annoying finger at the screen again, that’a somehow flipped right back to the Craigslist ad thingy.

And she’s actually not entirely right, because he hadn’t thought much about the gorgeous toothpick man with curls Steve wanted to be smothered by, suffocate in like a pillow. But when he did?

He’d thought most about how he looked soft, on the inside. Thought wild and idiotic things like maybe his soft could match Steve’s soft when no one else’s ever had and he was always left bruised for it, more than once near-unhealable, and maybe they could, like, if their softnesses matched, then like—

Something.

But Steve always comes on too strong, wants too much, hopes to hard and way too fast, though this shit might take the cake, there: so it was idiotic and he’d left that train of thought to derail on its own and—

Did that come on too strong?

His gaze snags on the words, those exact words up on the screen and he’s very tempted to start growling deep in the pit of his stomach, take a cue from Robin’s absurdity.

“Don’t you have a class to get to?” Steve asks, looking pointedly at the clock on the microwave: he knows she does. Pottery making. For self-edification.

She scowls but looks—swears colorfully because it’s later than she thought as she jumps up and goes to presumably…do whatever she does in the bathroom to get ready to leave and look her lesbian-luring best before she gets smattered in wet clay.

Steve remains unclear on whether that look’s more or less attractive to the specific ladies she’s trying to bait.

Either way: it prompts Robin to drop her one-woman campaign insisting Steve’s soulmate of the romantic flavor is calling our desperately into the void of the internet. But it also, however, has the…side-effect of making the time itself an obvious thing. 11:09.

Rob’s gonna take the car, she’s got…supplies and stuff.

Why that’s important is…lost on him.

He could debase himself and brave the bus, if he got off at Washington and—

What the fuck.

What. The. Fuck.

Steve very forcefully shoves Robin’s iPad back across the table and doesn’t think about anything, especially not the numbers, like the number 214, like two hours and fourteen minutes until—

Steve nearly chokes himself on his fucking spoon with how violently he shoves it, full of oats, between his lips. As if he can shut his brain up as easy as he can his mouth.

It…actually kinda works. He might have chipped a tooth.

——————

In the end, Steve is proud of himself for being reasonable and having standards. He doesn’t take a fucking bus to meet a stranger in a Costco parking lot, Jesus Christ. Come on.

He books an Uber.

(And yes, he and Robin agreed no solo Ubers for a month to save up to have the air conditioner looked at before it copped out on them because their landlord only gave a shit if it was dead-dead and yes, maybe she’d gone so far as to put their account on a hold you had to call and remove to avoid temptation—though of the two of them, she definitely had the bigger problem—but little did she think on the fact that while you had to link a phone number, you could just use Google Voice and make a new account and no, Steve’s not insane, or a hopeless romantic, or almost-asking-for-heartbreak-on-the-regular, thank you very much.

He is resourceful. And it’s only like $15 with tip. It’s a quick ride.)

He asks to be dropped near the back of the lot, and takes the walk up slow. Almost goes the long way, straight into the store. Almost turns back entirely.

But then he sees those curls.

And his throat does the…the weird tight thing for no fucking reason, and his feet don’t ask permission to walk in the direction of the man standing…less dumbstruck, now. Even from the back it’s clear.

Now: he’s waiting.

Steve can barely breathe, can’t fucking swallow for the state of his throat, but his feet still aren’t waiting for permission, so it’s only fucking seconds before he’s close enough to catch a whiff of cologne and then—

“Sorry,” Steve ducks around the man from behind and reaches out automatically to steady him when he startles. “Hey, sorry, you just looked like maybe you were looking for something?” Steve smiles as open, as reassuring as he knows. “Just wanted to check if you needed any help.”

Keep it casual, Steve, keep it fucking friendly and extra polite and—

“Oh my god.”

The guy barely breathes it out, his eyes so wide, and Steve doesn’t know why he hasn’t moved his hand from the guy’s arm but Steve can feel the electric current that runs through him, like the finest grade of trembling. And electricity, right, it travels. Conducts.

In case you felt your heart skip just one beat, didn’t even have to full-on stop—

And even that proximity to this man is nothing compared to hearing his voice, low and a little syrupy even as he stares in shock, in disbelief—and oh. Oh, but what was it the guy had written in his post? About feeling the earth move a little, or like, rewiring your cells just for meeting eyes?

Steve, he’s…

Yeah. Yeah.

Okay.

“You’re here.”

Steve blinks, rocked back to the moment to deal with the new tilt of the globe and the spontaneous realignment of his insides later. This guy’s looking at Steve like he’s unbelievable, like he’s miraculous, like he’s…

Sunshine.

“I’m here?” Steve asks, a little breathy, a little curious.

“I,” the guy swallows, lips shiny as he bites at them, fucking adorable; “I saw you, umm, yesterday and I maybe, well, possibly I wrote some,” he fumbles and sounds like he’s building up to eventual hysterics, so Steve acts wholly on instinct and reaches further now to catch at both his hands.

“Relax,” Steve breathes out with a smile, and doesn’t overthink smoothing his thumbs over the guy’s knuckles, just in case it soothes him.

“My friend,” Steve lets go with one hand and grabs his phone to show the page he’d loaded on the ride here; “she was convinced it was you, about me. I wasn’t, so,” he shakes his head quick when something falls in the guy’s face, something dims: oh, umm, no.

He cannot have that.

“Not trying to catch you out or something,” Steve exhales it warm, as reassuring as he can, with his whole chest as he grabs the guy’s hands in both his own again—since he seemed to not mind; “just,” and Steve shrugs even as he smiles a little, less self-deprecating with it than he’d probably have landed on if the guy hadn’t reacted to Steve’s hands on his by clinging back so tight:

“Just a little hard to believe, is all.”

The man barely lets the words settle before his jaw drops almost comically and he demands, high-pitched and somehow still rumbling, something commanding in it nonetheless:

“How?”

Like it’s unimaginable. Like Steve reading that post and walking into this lot and striding up to a perfect stranger—who may or may not be very famous but that’s actually not even a little bit of the point—but a stranger who would want to see him—

But then Steve’s meeting the guy’s eyes again; hadn’t wholly realized he’d been staring at their hands more than anything. Those eyes are like the night sky, swirling and endless and sparking in the right slant of light, and Steve feels them like a welcome, like a cushion of the stars, like a safe landing in a chaotic universe.

He doesn’t even know this man.

But he thinks…yesterday. Yesterday, his heart didn’t stop, not like this guy had written, but Steve understands now what it did do instead, the thing he did remember, the tightness in his throat: his heart didn’t stop.

It just surged upward and took up residence to pound at his trachea where it tripped instead. Which is kinda where he’s back to right now.

“Could I,” the guy’s voice is rough, shaky, and so is he, Steve feels it where he’s still got his hand gripped firm; “would it be too much to ask if I could hug you?”

And he huffs a breath, and it sounds too….too small, like he’s afraid or ashamed and it pings something hateful, but so much more protective in Steve’s blood just to hear it as he confesses on a end of an exhale:

“I just want to know if you’re real.”

And Steve didn’t grow up a hugger, but he sure as shit’s grown into one; he’d be one of those people standing in the city with a ‘Free Hugs’ sign without much convincing. But this guy.

This man in front of him who may or may not be famous, is definitely a stranger either way save that he poured out some lines on the internet that maybe exceeded the term ‘heartfelt’ by a mile, who may or may not be standing in here, inside this moment, for something like fate because…Steve did feel it.

Maybe he didn’t think twice about the immensity it could have, not in the moment, because he’d been shopping, and Robin’s story was funny and maybe he was just struck by his luck in living a life with his platonic soulmate and knowing joy; surely your heart can trip for that and just because it never had before, just because it did this one first time when he crossed eyes with a genuinely beautiful man who left Steve with half-a-second’s certainty that looking any longer would flay wide this unknown person’s soul for Steve to sift through: but Steve felt things like that easy, always had. Romanticized nothings like it was a profession.

But it never hit like this had, has—is—before, if indeed this is actually anything—

And Steve’s heart is still tripping but it’s back in his chest, and he knows it because where he’s pressed against this guy’s kinda-gasping chest, now, close and tight? Maybe Steve’s never paid attention before, or maybe Steve’s just never…touched like this before, even if all they’re doing is hugging in a fucking parking lot.

But.

He’s pressed there and his heart’s tripping in his chest and he knows it wholly and fully because he can feel this man’s heartbeat next to his own—and where it should be a battle, because it’s pounding, both of them are, one side literally against the other?

It feels like a caress. It feels like, like…

Steve closes his eyes tight because they start to sting with the single word it feels like: impossible, absurd, but…

Here he is. He’s never felt someone’s heartbeat pressed up against his own before. Definitely never felt—never dreamt—that it could feel like it fits.

He leans back when he thinks he’s got a hold on the hopelessness of his tender-hearted absurdity, but the guy is staring at him already when he does and suddenly Steve’s got a handle on absolutely nothing except his pulse jackrabbiting some more but then also feeling…like it lost something. Like it’s not complete.

And the man, he’s staring with those eyes so wide again but now it’s like he’s…it’s kinda like he knows. He knows his eyes are going to let Steve flay him wide open.

It’s like he’s begging Steve to…look. To look and less to take, and more to…have.

Maybe, maybe to keep?

And…how?

“Do you feel it?” the guy whispers, those deep dark eyes so big: just these vulnerable, bleeding hearts on main. “Even just—“ he tries to walk back, to open it all up wider, desperate and hopeful and Steve hears all of it because it’s all written in the same key as all that Steve knows, all that Steve is. Somehow.

Somehow.

So Steve blinks, too many times before he grabs the man harder and drags him in again to hold, hold, hold until the heartbeat on either side of Steve’s ribs is reaching for the other, touching. Until they’re holding on, too, and once they do, then he can whisper, warm and maybe wet in the crook of this man’s neck, this stranger who’s holding onto his heart now, unfathomable, as he speaks words he doesn’t have to think about first to know they’re going to shift the world again, this time so they both can know it in the souls of them together, all at once:

“I feel it.”

For @hbyrde36, who requested 'Missed Connection AU' at my HOBBIT-STYLE BIRTHDAY MONTH PROMPT FEST

✨permanent tag list: OPEN (lmk if you want to be added/removed): @pearynice @hbyrde36 @slashify @finntheehumaneater @wxrmland @dreamwatch @perseus-notjackson @estrellami-1 @bookworm0690 @imhereforthelolzdontyellatme @nerdyglassescheeseychick @swimmingbirdrunningrock @goodolefashionedloverboi @sanctumdemunson @theheadlessphilosopher @lawrencebshoggoth

divider credits here and here

💫 ao3 link here

[danieyells]

Could I pretty please ask for any Haru stuff you found? 🥺 I've been afflicted with the Haru simp disease and only information/content of him can cure me 🛐

HARU'S CHANGED MY FEELINGS ON HIM not that i disliked him at all before but like. . .you know how he acts like the team mom? His voicelines make this worse. I thought he was more like a meddlesome but chill guy with a lot of energy. The truth is this poor man is a single mother with two unruly kids, a house full of animals, and VIRTUALLY NO HELP BESIDES YOU. No wonder he drinks nearly every fucking night. I get why Jabberwock doesn't have ordinary students but jesus christ please get some helpers in here. My man is overworked.

I ended up putting almost all of them in because. . .he is struggling poor boy. I have officially edited this to contain all of Haru's voicelines! Sorry for the wait!!

Hello: (the first time the game is opened after that character is set as home screen NPC. Only happens once per day, unless the character is switched out and back.)

"Hey, nice timing! One sec, I've just gotta finish feeding everyone."

You've Got Mail: (whenever there's something in the inbox, usually Arena rewards)

"You've got some letters! Better open them before that goat lookalike makes a meal out of them!"

Default: (requires no affinity, has no time constraints)

"Folks are going wild over the Anomalous Animal Back To Nature Tour, and this is your chance to experience it at a discount rate! C'mon, help me hand out these fliers!"

"Everyone stuffs up sometimes. Don't let it get to you—just think of it as a funny story you can pull out later and laugh at! Gahaha!"

the only way he knows how to cope with his pain is to laugh at it. . .my therapist told me that was good actually! he's well adjusted! disregard the nightly drinking.

"You sure are fond of {PC}, aren't you, Peekaboo? You did nothing but bite me for the first three days after we met."

tbf you were from another house and it was probably fresh after the clash. . . .

"You reckon I work hard? Nah, this is nothing to write home about. All right, let's head to the next zone!"

"Hey, nice work out there today! Let's knock a few more jobs off the list then take a break, hey?"

oh my god you take breaks? or are you telling the player to take a break while you keep overdoing it. . . .

Affinity 1: (between 5am and 11am)

"Morning! Let's get this show on the road!"

Affinity 2: (between 11am and 4pm)

"Hey, {PC}! What a coinkydink! I just finished my rounds."

Affinity 3: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"Ren? He's working at that whacky restaurant again. I'll have to go pick him up later."

Affinity 4: (between 8pm and 5am)

"Towa's off to that hill again? I was gonna ask him to hold down the fort... Guess I'll have to stay put tonight."

Affinity 5: (between 8pm and 5am)

"Am I tired? Nah, don't worry, if there's two things I have confidence in it's my stamina and my bad luck!"

Affinity 6: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"The Sinostra folks are causing a kerfuffle again... I don't need any of that! You should take care not to get dragged into their mess too, you hear?"

Affinity 7: (between 11am and 4pm)

"You wanna know how to get the animals to like you? You just gotta show how much you love them, like this— Ow! Don't bite me, Peekaboo!"

Affinity 8: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"None of our critters have warmed to Ren at all, even though he spends all day with them... Guess that handsome face only works on humans."

Affinity 9: (between 8pm and 5am)

"Phew, time for a bre— Hm? That sounded like the Capybus! I'm gonna go check on her, watch Peekaboo for me!"

Affinity 10: (between 10pm and midnight)

"All right, the kids are all in bed. I'll just ask those two to hold down the fort, then I'll head out for a little walk..."

Affinity 11: (between 5am and 11am)

"I went to wake that sleepyhead Ren up this morning, but it was like he couldn't see me even though he was looking straight at me. Reckon his eyesight's bad?"

Affinity 12: (between 11am and 4pm)

"Course I eat, don't worry about that! Just earlier I pinched some of Peekaboo's veggies when I was making his lunch and had them with a piece of bread!"

Please eat food. . . .

Affinity 13: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"So much to do... Gotta take in the washing and get the shopping done... Argh! There's not enough hours in the day!"

Affinity 14: (between 5am and 11am)

"This? It's an energy drink. Don't feel like the day's started till I have one. (gulp) (gulp) Pwaaah!"

PLEASE EAT FOOD AND SLEEP. . . . . . . . .

Affinity 15: (between 5am and 11am)

"Ah man, there's soap all over the walls again! You're so good at playing with the animals Towa, if you could just learn how to clean up after you'd get full marks..."

Towa i love you but please help your mother boyfriend captain. . . .

Affinity 16: (between 11am and 4pm)

"Ah! I can't do dogs! How'd you get in here?! Towa!! Come here!! No!! Don't bite me!!"

He is terrified of dogs????? Towa absolutely electrocuted the shit out of that dog. Rip in pieces. That dog truly fucked around and found out. It will never go in the dorm again.

Affinity 17: (between 10pm and midnight)

"Thanks for helping out again today, you're a real lifesaver. Sorry I can't walk you back..."

Affinity 18: (between 8pm and 5am)

"You reckon I look like an acrobat when I'm using my stigma? Gahaha! Maybe I'll practice balancing on a ball then!"

Baby no you are not a clown please what if you break something again--

Affinity 19: (between 10pm and midnight)

"...(gasp) Crap, I fell asleep... Did you put this blanket on me? Cheers... Maybe I'll grab a few more minutes..."

Affinity 20: (between 5am and 11am)

"I swore I'd take responsibility for protecting all the lives in this park. I can't let anyone die on my watch."

Affinity 21: (between 11am and 4pm)

"I don't know where I'd be without all the critters in this place if I'm honest with you. Well, gotta be my animal magnetism that's keeping them here anyway! Gahaha!"

Affinity 22: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"Hm? There's some critters whose nails were getting dangerously long so I was giving them a clip. Come here, I'll do yours too if you want!"

Affinity 23: (between 8pm and 5am)

"Oh, off for a cheeky night out? Gahaha! I know a good place, want me to take you?"

get wasted with him and give him somebody to talk to!! he needs someone besides romeo and rui to listen to him rant sometimes!

Affinity 24: (between 10pm and midnight)

"A soft bed to lie down in and someone to chat with till I drift off... I'm really living the high life here."

He's a simple man. . .it's easy to imagine him holding your hand here while he dozes off. . . .

Affinity 25(max): (no time constraints)

"Really learned the ropes here, haven't you? Once we have a little cash to spare, I'll buy you your own Jabberwock uniform!"

they must be expensive if it takes until Affinity 25 to get you one! He's so conscious about his finances(disregard all of the stuff he buys and never uses--) that being given a purchased gift is surely the highest tier of affection from him haha. But also. . .he treats the anomalous animals and oftentimes even the other ghouls in Jabberwock like they're his kids. This is his way of saying 'you're part of this family too.' Which is very sweet.

Spring: (March-May) (between 5am and 11am)

"Today's shearing day for the fluffy squad! It's actually a pretty hefty task, so I've gotta hop to it if I want to be done before summer..."

(between 11am and 4pm)

"Bucket, check. Trowel, check. Me and Towa are heading to the mountains to pick some veggies. You wanna come?"

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"We've been getting a lot of balmy days lately, and the sun's up longer. Can't help but dilly-dally when I'm working..."

(between 8pm and 5am)

"I've gotta clean out all the sparrow nests soon or they won't be able to look after their kiddos properly. Looks like there's... 61 nests total..."

Summer: (June-August) (between 5am and 11am)

"A lot of customers have been saying they wanna stay cool in the summer so I changed up the course. Now we have a special summer-only waterside tour!"

(between 11am and 4pm)

"It's hot so I invited Ren to go fishing, but his face screwed up like a prune and he yelled at me. What's he got against fish?"

Probably the same thing you have against dogs. . . .

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"Phew... Finally finished harvesting all the feed crops for the day... Everyone's health is dependent on their quality, so now's the time to do it right."

(between 8pm and 5am)

"Lotta bugs around this time of year... But they're important for the food chain, so I've gotta take care of them... Argh!! Give it a rest with the buzzing!"

Autumn: (September-November) (between 5am and 11am)

"Hey, nice timing! I'm about to make a fire with the dead leaves I collected so I can bake some potatoes, take a seat!"

(between 11am and 4pm)

"I like the Jabberwock uniforms. They're made out of high-performance fabric that keeps you warm when it's cold out and safe when you're handling venomous critters!"

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"The hibernation squad's gonna start eating us out of house and home this month... The food bill's gonna be rough... Eeek!"

(between 8pm and 5am)

"You reckon that's a rabbit on the moon? No way, it's a toad! C'mon, look closer!"

apparently the pareidolic toad in the moon is a Chinese myth! I wonder if they mean to suggest Haru is actually Chinese.

Winter: (December-February) (between 5am and 11am)

"Rounds are quicker in winter since some of the critters hibernate. Makes things a little easie— Why's the kitchen on fire?!"

(between 11am and 4pm)

"Brr... Can't help but get green-eyed looking at the furry critters when it's this cold..."

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"Nice and toasty... Hm? I'm talking about Peekaboo! He's better than a hot water bottle in this weather!"

Haru putting Peekaboo on your tummy when you're having cramps or just in pain in general is a cute mental image, especially since Peekaboo likes you lol

(between 8pm and 5am)

"It's cold outside so some of the critters have been sneaking into our rooms at night. You heard Ren scream just now, right?"

His birthday: (September 20th)

"It's my birthday?! Oops, totally slipped my mind... Thanks for remembering!"

Your birthday:

"Happy birthday. The Capybus is all yours today—I've got a custom birthday tour all planned out for you!"

New Years: (January 1st)

"Happy New Year! How'd I ring it in? I was milking the cow and when I looked up I'd totally missed the first sunrise! Gahaha!"

Valentine's Day: (February 14th)

"You're kidding, I can really have this?! They say a little sugar helps sweeten a tired day! Thanks a million, this'll keep me going a while!"

White Day: (March 13th)

"Ta-da! I bought you some hand cream, for the chocolate you got me last month. Thanks for everything you do here."

hand cream when you do all of that manual labor and probably have to wash your hands a lot is a really practical gift actually, gg haru

April Fool's Day: (April 1st)

"Can you believe this? Ren got up early, and Towa fed everyone for me! ...Tried to make a joke for April Fools but it just made me feel empty inside..."

Halloween: (October 31st)

"Check it out! The pumpkin Capybus, in town for three days only! I sacrificed sleep and some of our budget to get her ready!"

If it's painted I really hope that paint is waterproof. . .never know when Towa's gonna make it rain. . . .

Christmas: (December 25th)

"Merry Christmas! This is a reindeer, she lives up in the mountains! And I'm Sagara Claus! Gahaha!"

just don't let romeo see it lolol

Idle: (about 20 seconds without interacting with the game) (below 13 affinity)

"Hey there, miss! Looking gorgeous as ever! ...Wait, I was kidding! Come back!"

(13 affinity and above)

"You seem pretty flat out today... Nothing for it, I'll get a few other things out of the way while I wait for you to get back."

Absent: (logging in for the first time in 2 or more days?)

"Phew, that's a relief... I was worried one of ours ate you... Glad to see you back."

Once again. . .an absolute sweetheart. And a single mother who is desperately in need of some help around the house. That April Fool's line really got me lolol poor guy. All of his have a lot of energy to them so i feel like i posted more than Haku, who's kind of a more low key guy lol. . . .

[amorganva]

Putting down my unhinged theories

I voiced all of these during my playthrough but I wanna put them down anyways Lies of P is a game of lies and I often feel like the game itself is trying to lie to us so...... Compiling Theories

Carlo and Romeo didn't die of Petrification disease I honestly believe that something else killed both of them. The Petrification disease is just too much of a convenience and would've been used as a cover up. Why else would the stalker be like "Gemini, get rid of them." "I'm so sorry....I was too late" if it was only Carlo contracting the disease. The pose the body is in to me clearly conveys DEAD. And even if he caught the disease, Mr. Geppetto, the amazing Geppetto of the Workshop Union who sends his son to the MONAD CHARITY HOUSE - Valentinus Monad: Leader of the Alchemists - surely, SURELY he would've gotten a cure for his son/be able to afford it. Hell, Geppetto knew of his daughter, Sophia, and of Simon Manus. He had the connections. Giangio cures Antonia after all and she only dies because her organs were too damaged already so the disease was the thing keeping her alive. If caught early on, Carlo would have lived and given Romeo part of his cure seeing as it's implied that Geppetto didn't very much like Romeo - worded as "a grudge." What this grudge is about - getting his son killed or something else....we don't know yet but hopefully will find out.

2. There's 2 Geminis "Gemini, get rid of them." ...How? He's a cricket guide. Or is he? I honestly think there's a cricket Gemini and a Stalker or puppet Gemini. Or it's one and the same and he's now "atoning" so to speak by helping PCarlo in his cricket form. It feels like Sophia knew Gemini from somewhere because she's like "I see they got Gemini too." And since Sophia knew Carlo as a child from their time at Monad... "Gemini get rid of them" may have been misinterpreted....and subsequently covered up since she was a famous, legendary stalker. Also his name spelled Gemini, to avoid copyright they couldn't go with Jiminy but...they could have also used any other name since most names are based on the original story or versions thereof and the cricket is only ever the cricket. Sticking with Jiminy but spelling it like the astrological twins sign is too much of a coinkydink for me. Gemini was there in the car, the car that Geppetto based his secret workshop in. Mhh..

3. If Camille acted on instinct saving a baby - something beyond her programming - then PuppetRomeo and P are 100% acting on muscle memory from their lives mixed with puppet strength/speed. Which means that Romeo and Carlo were actually pretty good stalkers-in-training. I talked about this in my Romeo appreciation post but I can totally see live Romeo doing fancy moves like that, like he's dancing, and Carlo just wanting to get things done quick and clean. This lends to my theory that something other than a disease must've gotten to at least Carlo because he'd be more skilled than that. (He took down all major puppets and a demigod thing by himself with the occasional Sophia rewind....no way in hell that's just programming, since P is awakening) Then again we don't know how old exactly he was when he died. But Geppetto made him a young adult puppet and the nameless puppet is clearly not a child (assuming it's Carlo's OG body yes?) so it's safe to think he could've handled himself in combat somewhat by that point. Something more powerful did him in and the game is lying to you and I stand by that until the series is finished and I'm either right or have to concede that it just do be like that and his origin story is just kind of "yeah he died. Nothing more than that. Let's get the plot going." But that feels very Un-Neowiz because this world and its characters are full of easter eggs and research and care that I don't think the devs would just handwave something as big as this.

4. Not so much a theory as a comment but imagine seeing the guy you had fun talks with, helped out, nerded out with, listened to music with all of a sudden just kills you and every one of your friends. The evil ending is so devastating and I feel the badest for our girl Eugenie she's so sweet. Eugenie and her country and origin will hopefully get more elaboration, maybe Carlo will sail beyond the seas of Krat. Also that literally no one at the hotel seems to realize P is a puppet. Maybe Antonia since she knew Geppetto. But since you are required to lie and P is a special puppet who can lie....easy mistake to make. Venigni would've realized Law 0 much sooner - that Geppetto can create exceptions. Which also makes the Romeo fight even sadder - because P is exempt every other puppet must attack him...he can't help himself. My bro better be revived with some ergo, we need more of him and I think the devs know by now how popular of a character he is...I think...I hope...(alongside the lords of drip - the BRBH) 5. There's not really a timeskip in the lore. Sophia was trapped for a few years...maybe? She knew Carlo and Romeo since they were children at Monad and she's maaaaybe in her late 20s? early 30s? That means that the time between Carlo's and Romeo's deaths can't have been more than a year or two from when the game started. The King of Puppets was created to cover up the true origin of the Frenzy - that's Romeo and he awakened way before Carlo - his model only looks shabby because he literally exploded into flames, not because it's decades old (if you look at the model textures they might look old and grainy but that's literally everything in this game - look at Ps sock textures).

They were created after Arlecchino - Covenant. Carlo's body proved unstable, volatile - making Geppetto spend more time on a new and improved version of a puppet which is why P looks so human and polished aside from the Legion Arm. I still commend Geppetto for giving his son freckles. He did this for us. Aside from that you'd probably recreate your child the way you knew them and the last G probably heard from his son was the Graduation which would be like 17/18. So he was probably just a little older - like early 20s.

6. Carlo's journey is that of a Heart, a Brain, and Courage. Tying in with the Wizard of Oz, if Dorothy doesn't end up as our player character, I feel like Carlo received his Heart in the first game from Geppetto and Sophia. The second game will focus on recovering more of his memories and personality - the brain. The last game, because it 100% is a trilogy, will focus on the courage to do what's needed to save....Krat? The world? His friends? Who knows - from whatever org Paracelsus belongs to. And then...we go home :)

This is probably why the game has stuck with me well after having played it multiple times. I love it when it gives you material to theorize with but also isn't so open ended that it's not satisfying, that the story is just whatever you want or gives you nothing to work with. Maybe I should do some Link Click crossover doodles mhh.

[13thdoctorposts]

What also gets me is ""progressives"" deflecting discussion of this bigotry. Its always 'stars wars fandom is worse', 'everywhere has sucky discourse', 'social media amplifies trolls'. And 'that never happened and if it did happen I didn't do it and if I did do it it was for good reason', like please. And third, because this fandom IS that bad, how about the coinkydink that this "progressive" fandom has propped up grotesque right-wing content creators with millions of views that these very believable leftists just happen to parrot, but ONLY when it comes to 13 and how dare we speak about the smear campaign against this era since day1.

👆👆👆

This is why I don’t really care what I say. If you wish to defend 13 era who you are somehow a bigot and too woke at the same time depending on which side of the fandom is criticising or ‘critiquing’ your opinion.

[ganjamonster11]

Hello Grambles. Ihope this ask finds you covered in cheese and really Happy and well. MY QUESTION: what is your favorite shirt you own. and pants i thinkj i van guess which oants but say anyways. Favorite shoes ifyou have multiple pairs. Favorite jacket... Hopefully the Concrete Jungle is forgiving to you on thus day and you find some yummy food Out side. And rice pudding. i would share my favorite Cloth from each catty gorey but id have to break it down insto Groups like favorite t shirt fav sweater favorite button down Itse too complicated. Dont think about it to heard. God bless 🏜️🏜️🏜️🏜️🏜️🏜️🏜️🏜️🏜️🏜️🏜️🏜️🏜️🏜️🏜️🏜️🏜️🏜️🏜️🏜️🏜️🏜️🏜️🏜️🏜️🏜️🏜️🏜️

HELLO SNEAKLE. Am Dripping wit cheese right nyow actually How convenient of an ask is this. What a coinkydink. MY FAVORITE SHIRT… Don’t Think i got one… I Got a couple misfits shirt I Like to blunt rotate but i usually just throw on whatever i can find And walk out da door. I wear like three pairs of pants period. I Do Not care. Horrendously unhygenic.IF IT COUNTS Am saving up to buy this new AWESOME Shirt I’ll let you see it now

This will be a real hit wit da Germs and Fleas all over me… INEED SOME FUCKING RICE PUDDING!!!!!! Please Please please Give me a rice pudding cup Cold Unforgiving fridge. I Fucking love your Shirts dude i need to come over and wriggle my feet all over them And sleep on your carpet. Also I thought you’d like to know I’ve been listening to Sex For Homework and the Tight album (mostly Pussy All Night) All freakin day man. Each time LJU says some insensitive shit I Imagine the Sneakle ‘Wat he say’ image..or one of Marc’s posts I Can’t remember which…. Da one were he say ‘jimmy you can’t say dat’. I Talk about you guys like everyone is supposed 2 know you. Like Wat u mean you didn’t see Marcs Latest reblog. Dat one had a chantal. 🍃

[icy-watch]

Hi, everyone!

What a coinkydink that right around when I’m going to liveblog, AO3 goes down? Almost as if I planned on it to entertain y’all.

Alright, we ready? Grab those smiling faces and a friend

And let’s go while the getting’s good!

[milkygothgf]

Hiiiii, drunk anon here! Not drunk currently, but I am horny, and edging, and I love love loooooooove seeing you respond to my asks (bit of an attention whore myself tbh >×<)

Anyways, I was going through your likes and only just now saw that intoxication is in there! What a coinkydink! XD

I'm actually touching myself about to get into the shower right now and started thinking about how cute you would be if I got you drunk! Absolutely loaded with fruity cocktails and hard liquor that I bought you and pressured you into taking (who needs roofies when social anxiety and manipulation do all the work for you ♡w♡)

Then, once you were nice and wasted, what if I offered to help sober you up and help your future hangover with a super secret trick I learned! It's called the Milking Method where I hook you up to a machine and put automated pumps on your low-hanging udders, then squeeeeeeeeze all the, um... "alcohol" out through your tits! Of course, it's bullshit, but you're just too sloshed to care, so you let me draw buckets and buckets of sweet, creamy milk from your big, delicious tits aaaaalllllll night. All the while I keep making up more and more nonsense about the method, like, "And actually, massaging the mammary glands helps draw the alcohol towards your nipples," and, "Oftentimes, I've found that stimulation of the reproductive organs can accelerate the movement of fluids through the endocrinal system," making sure to use lots of big words so you think I'm super smart and blindly put your faith in me while I play with your clit and finger your ass and, all around, just poke and play with your entire soft, slutty body! <3

Drunk anon, my love, I'm too high and you've made me too horny to know how to respond to this ♡.♡ Just, uh, yes. Yes please. Please.

[wwenhlimagines]

Stuck in the Middle - Part 5

Hook x Y/N x Ricky Starks

Part 4

After a few days at home, Y/N finds herself overthinking everything that happened last week and decides to call Ruby Soho to talk about it.

My mind has been running in circles ever since I got home a couple of days ago. After breakfast with Hook, I had been feeling a lot more at ease and comfortable in my position in the company. However, Ricky was so nice to upgrade my seat and talk to me to make sure I didn't think he was a complete jackass from the DMs he had sent previously. I know I should just ignore it all and enjoy my time at home with my friends, but as I try to talk to them about it, they start drooling over the two men and taking sides.

"Kelsey! I don't want to hear anymore about how yummy you think Ricky is based on his Instagram." Kelsey groaned and sat back in her seat as Gabby leaned forward, ready to defend Hook. "No... no, no. You do not know Hook. He stays off of social media for the most part." My friends roll their eyes, and we change the subject and finish up our weekly brunch date.

I've just sat down on my couch when I see a text from Ruby come in.

How is everything going, new girl? 😛

I smile and respond, asking if I can call her, which she quickly reads and calls me herself.

What's up buttercup?

Ugh, my friends have been drooling over the boys ever since I told them about the whole situation. They have even taken sides and told me what they would do if they were in my position.

Well, what do you want to do about the little live triangle you seem to have become a part of?

I just want to be friends with everyone and get comfortable with my new job without all the drama.

I'm not saying that is going to be easy, but I'll have your back no matter what. I can always get Eddie and Ortiz to knock some sense into them as well.

We both laugh and change the subject to talk about Ruby's match and my backstage interviews for the week. Dynamite is in Indianapolis this week, so Ruby invites me to stay at her place, and I happily accept before hanging up and getting ready for the week.

Wednesday

Ruby and I woke up and went for a workout before grabbing some lunch and heading to the arena. We walk in and go our separate ways as I go find Tony and get my directions for the show. Soon after, I find my way to the Glam Squad setup and let them work their magic to give me a nice purple smoky eye to go with my outfit for the interviews. Just as they are putting on the finishing touches, Danhausen walks in frantic with half of his face paint smeared. They give him some wipes to take off the paint and let him start over at one of their stations since most of the girls are ready.

Hello again, Y/Nhausen! What a coinkydink seeing you here.

I fix my dress as I stand up and walk over to him.

Why, hello, Danhausen. It is great to see you again. I should probably go find Eddie. He is my first interview tonight.

Ah yes, Edward, very nice, very scary in the ring. Good luck tonight!

We wave goodbye, and I walk out of the Glam Squad area and almost smack into Hook. Luckily, he caught my shoulders and steadied me as I jolted back when I came face first with his chest.

I'm so sorry, Y/N! Didn't see you coming around the corner. Have you seen Dan?

I balanced myself out before nodding and pointing back to the Glam area. The smell of his cologne had almost put me in a daze when I nearly collided with his chest. Hook looked me up and down to check that I'm alright before nodding and heading to go find his tag partner for tonight. I shook my head and walked away to go walk around and find Eddie Kingston.

Hey Eddie! Are you ready for your promo?

I wave at him as I walk over to him and Ortiz talking near the interview setup. Eddie smiles at me and high fives me as I approach him.

There is the woman everybody is talking about! I hope they haven't scared you too much so far. This is Ortiz, aka Monkey, and we should be your first victims tonight, right?

I nod and smile as we make a bit of small talk, and they tell me about how they have heard about my situation from Ruby but also just whispers around the locker room in general.

Don't worry, sweetheart! Just let us know, and we will put them in their place if need be. Right, Ortiz?

They do their little handshake, and I giggle lightly as I start to loosen up and feel better talking to these two. I know they are both happy with their women and would never do anything to jeopardize that, so I can count on them to be my guy best friends and tell me the truth even when I don't want to hear it.

The interview with them went really well as they had helped calm my nerves beforehand. We hugged it out after the cameras cut back down to the ring, and I went to get a drink from catering just as I heard Hook's music hit and the fans go crazy. I sit back and watch the match until Tony comes over frantic telling me I need to interview them after their match since another interviewer was sick at the moment.

I quickly make my way to the backstage area and wait for them to come back as Ricky is warming up as he is next. I internally groan as he waves at me, and I smile and wave back, hoping he is too focused on his match to think about coming over to talk to me. But, oh boy, I was so wrong. Ricky strutted his way over and looked me up and down, whistling low in approval of my outfit.

Damn girl, that dress is beautiful on you.

I try my best not to blush as I roll my eyes and fix my dress when I hear Hook's music start up again.

Thanks, Ricky! Now go out there and kick some ass.

He smirks and walks away to prepare himself to walk out. Just as I expected, Hook and Danhausen walk back and look a bit confused when they see me backstage. I smile and whisper to them to just go with it before the cameras turn on.

Wow, Hook, Danhausen, that was a great victory out there. How are you feeling?

Danhausen goes to speak, but Hook smirks before speaking up himself.

Pretty good, now that we get to see you.

I'm shocked, to say the least, so I start to stutter when Danhausen takes my mic and starts walking towards the camera.

And that's all for this week's edition of Chips or Chicks with Hook. Back to you, Excalibur!

The cameras turn off, and I shake my head in disbelief before walking away to clear my head.

Hook's POV

Danhausen and I are walking backstage when I see Ricky warming up with a smirk on his face. I try to ignore him and walk past him, but he puts his hand on my chest, making me stop in the tracks.

Good job out there, Hook. Hope your interview skills have improved since last week.

He winks before Danhausen pulls me forward, and we walk towards the backstage interview area. I get a bit flustered when I see Y/N there instead of Lexi as scheduled, but try to brush it off. She tells us to just roll with it when she sees our confused faces and the cameras turn on. I honestly can't tell you what came over me, but after Ricky's dig moments ago, I decided to shoot my shot mid interview. Y/N looks horrified, and Danhausen quickly improvises as I watch her flustered face turning pink. She walks off before I can even apologize, and I sigh, realizing how much Ricky really is playing mind games with me.

What was that supposed to be? A pickup line?

I look back at Danhausen, who has now broken character and started to scold me like my dad. I groan and storm off to find a secluded part of the arena to cool off in.

Tags: @thesupreme316 @gethooked @730hook @baybay-boom @hookedonhook @louisianalady @hooks-martin @imswitchbabemox @plentyoffandoms @730cssndr @legit9thlunaticwarrior @lclb13 @hookswifeeyy @hookhausen

[rjalker]

Did Anne McCaffrey intend to tell us that the Pern colonists are the exact sort of people who'd sing praise for the phrase "reject modernity, embrace tradition"?

No.

Is that what this world building (if you can call it that) means, though?

Yes.

[ID: The Anakin and Padme meme, with Anakin edited so he is calmly saying,

"We hate the way technology is used in our current society so when we build this new colony we're going to go back to basics."

Padme, with the text completely covering her face so it all fits, replies,

"Because the current industrialization is bad for the environment and supports capitalism and bigotry, right? You want to go back to basics so that it's better for the environment and everyone will have what they need without being forced to endlessly consume resources, right? You're doing this because you care about people, right? You're not just power hungry misogynysts who want to Return To Tradition where women and everyone else who's not a white man are penniless workers or homeless or broodmares forced to endlessly give birth to children until they die, and have literally no rights or property of their own, right?"

Anakin stares back in ominous silence.

Padme, now looking distressed, responds, "Oh for fucks sake you just hate minorities and want white men to be the only ones with power again don't you".

End ID.]

Sarcasm: What a fucking coinkydink that we know several groups of Asian people came along on the expedition but for some totally coincidental totally normal not important at all coincidance, none of their names were inexplicably passed down through generations to still be seen as culturally important and cherished.........wow I'm sure that doesn't tell us anything at all important about this setting or the author........it's totally just a coincidance, up to random chance!!!!! /Sarcasm.

[rosicheeks]

You’ve got such a nice ass and I’d love to make out in your car.

What a coinkydink I’m in my car right now!!!

[tonysaintborgi]

bear furry likes a drink that is fermented honey who knew

what a coinkydink right. would you be surprised to learn one of my favorite meals to make is salmon that's been baked in a berries and honey reduction.

i know I've mentioned it before but funnily, i was thiiiiiiiiiiiiis close to going with a shark for my sona.

[hangon-silvergirl]

Witchy!Chrissy and unaware Eddie. Guess Bewitched vibes au maybe? Lol

I dig that as a prequel to actual Hellcheer Bewitched shenanigans, but I also love the idea of Eddie being in on the secret and the two of them trying to keep her magic under wraps in mundane situations. Also a less-shitty version (non-abusive, instead just thinks Eddie's not good enough for her precious baby) of Laura as a reimagined Eudora, because long-suffering Eddie having to Deal With That is the stuff dreams are made of.

Anyway! Here's some HCs about them meeting/getting together:

Eddie meets her at her engagement party to Jason, where he's playing in the band. He thinks that it's a shame that she's about to be shackled to the world's most self-absorbed side-part. He's not gonna do anything about it though, that's not his place; but he finds her hiding when he goes out to have a smoke. He calms her nerves, makes her laugh; she opens up a bit and he finds a natural-ish segue to insisting that she can do better. Back inside, some opportune freak trip of the wires (or... perhaps a well-placed nose wiggle) sets off the indoor fire sprinklers, and Jason's True Nature is revealed as she starts going off at the staff. Chrissy breaks things off right then and there, and she winks at Eddie as she stalks out of the place. Eddie's giddy about it for like, a month after.

He doesn't actually see her again for six months, and it's by chance then; he walks up to a bus stop and there she is, tucked on a bench as pretty as you please, absorbed in reading A Secret History of Witches. He grins, plops down next to her on the bench with loud a, "Well hello," that startles the hell out of her. She smiles broadly when she recognizes him, though. They talk about the fallout from her calling off the engagement, and etc. He asks her out, and she agrees. While they're sitting there waiting for their buses, they see a mother with a stroller crossing the street, and then a car whips around a corner too fast and with no line of sight, straight at the crosswalk. Eddie's half-way to his feet in a panic, but then in a quick blink the woman and stroller are on the sidewalk on the other side of the street, out of harm's way. "The fuck?" Eddie can't believe his eyes, doesn't know what to believe. (He doesn't miss Chrissy's knowing little relieved smile, though, and he tucks it away to dissect later.)

They date for a year. It's a year full of strange little coinkydinks. Eddie actually thinks he might be going crazy. He knows that it has something to do with Chrissy, but he hasn't figured it out yet. He watched a mug put itself back together. Chrissy can change her clothes in the wink of an eye. She always has whatever food he's craving in her fridge or pantry, or cooking in the oven already. She has terrifying dexterity or some kind of premonitory insight, because she's forever catching things as they fall or before they fall, and she can finish tasks so fast it makes his head spin. Her house is always meticulously clean, but she's never home and doesn't have a housekeeper. She always seems to know what he's thinking, often answering his questions before he asks them, or anticipating things he wants or longs for without having to be told. Don't get him wrong, Eddie is ass over tits for her, is so in love with her that it's probably bordering on problematic, and would bend over backwards to make her happy, but still... there's something about her that he can't put his finger on.

It comes to a head when he proposes to her. Overcome with emotion at his heartfelt proposal, Chrissy's natural magic seeps out of her. There's a gust of wind and a display of fireworks, and everything on the coffee table starts levitating. "Uh," is all that Eddie can articulate in response to this, worried that he's accidentally ingested shrooms or something, still down on one knee on the floor with the ring box up and open. Chrissy tells him that she wants to marry him so much but she has to tell him something first. He assumes, and desperately hopes, that it will be an explanation for all the strange shit he's noticed, including the fact that the all the houseplants in her living room are now flashing like stop lights.

She tells him she's a witch. He breathes a sigh of relief. She seems amazed that he doesn't have more questions; he assures her that he does, but right now he's just settling into the knowledge that he hasn't been slowly going nuts for the last year. She hesitantly asks if he still loves her, if he still wants to marry her, and he honestly replies, "Cunningham, I'd still love and marry you if you told me you were Morgan La Fay, reborn and on the hunt for Arthur to murder the hell out of him. And I'd help."

Thanks for the ask, anon!

Request comes from this post: Send Me an AU & I'll Give You 5+ Headcanons About It.

[mlobsters]

tw suicide

supernatural s8e19 taxi driver (w. eugenie ross-leming, brad buckner)

what is this music, are we in a police procedural??? daily gripe that this show would have been so much better with a different score

all right a lot happening here. bobby's in hell??? the trial requires getting an innocent soul out of hell into heaven, well gee. what a COINKYDINK. but sam's off to do the quest by himself, dean must be freakin out

"so this is hell?" sure looks like purgatory. but that made me realize i hadn't determined if sam remembers the cage at all since castiel took the hallucinations etc away. has the show said?

SAM Wait. So you're not coming with me? AJAY Don't be ridiculous. Smuggling a mortal across the border is risky enough. But gate-crashing a Winchester into Hell seriously blows.

cute way to put it

KEVIN Just tell me when this all ends, 'cause that's the only thing I want to hear. DEAN No, like I told you before, this isn't going to end. Look, man, other guys, they got it easy, you know? It's all backyard barbecues and... bowling teams, but you and me? We got to carry a little extra weight. KEVIN I can't take it. DEAN Yes, you can. Hey, look at me. Now, this whole thing sucks. I know. But you suck it up and you push through because that's what we do. And when you get on board with that, the ride is a lot smoother. French fry?

dean channeling john winchester. also reminds me when dean was breaking down in the hospital after castiel told him he had to stop the apocalypse

from s4e16 on the head of a pin: DEAN Is it true? Did I break the first seal? Did I start all this? CASTIEL Yes. When we discovered Lilith's plan for you, we laid siege to hell and we fought our way to get to you before you— DEAN Jump-started the apocalypse. CASTIEL And we were too late. DEAN Why didn't you just leave me there, then? CASTIEL It's not blame that falls on you, Dean, it's fate. The righteous man who begins it is the only one who can finish it. You have to stop it.

just made me think about sam being the righteous man that stopped it.. anyway, what i was originally thinking about in contrast was how it continues:

DEAN Lucifer? The apocalypse? What does that mean? Hey! Don't you go disappearing on me, you son of a bitch. What does that mean! CASTIEL I don't know. DEAN Bull. CASTIEL I don't. Dean, they don't tell me much. I know our fate rests with you. DEAN Well, then you guys are screwed. I can't do it, Cas. It's too big. Alastair was right. I'm not all here. I'm not—I'm not strong enough. Well, I guess I'm not the man either of our dads wanted me to be. Find someone else. It's not me.

thought of that because it's such a similar situation. but i mean dean has been on this ride so many times... just recent iteration with frank telling him he's killing himself the way he's working after bobby died, to be professional and smile through it and fake you're fine (coincidentally it was the krissy/baby teen wolf paige episode s7e11)

oh sam. my emotional state is doing the work here for being traumatizing for sam to be wandering in, because the looks and sounds of hell here are very... xena production quality, just a little darker. though if sam doesn't remember the cage anymore, maybe there's no trauma to be had!

also, why did he take off his watch and put it on the wall, the watch specifically seems like a bad thing to remove? and what's that about hell time being different, so dean's 4 months was 40 years boop boop does that mean sam's gotta stay down there 117 days for 24 hours to pass topside? or does that only apply to being tortured. too high to logic (or my pet theory did they make that time inflation just for more dean whump and promptly forgot about it)

CROWLEY Something is going on. My Hellhound has been killed. Winchester jumbo size is trying to break into the mother ship.

low hanging fruit but i laughed

they really lean into benny talking to dean like a boyfriend

BENNY So good to hear your voice, Dean. I mean that. DEAN How you been? BENNY Oh, you know... I get by. DEAN I guess I let you down, huh? BENNY Look, I'm, uh... I'm just happy as hell to hear from you.

poor benny. so what, dean's gonna ask him to die to go to purgatory, help sam and bobby, take a ride in sam's arm back to earth? lol

oh benny. agh. feelings!

BENNY Wow. When Dean Winchester asks for a favor, he's not screwing around. DEAN Benny, sending you back there is the last thing I ever wanted to do. BENNY I know. I know. DEAN But my little brother is stuck down there. BENNY This would be the little brother who wants to kill me, right? DEAN You got access to the place. BENNY By "access," you mean "getting beheaded"? DEAN Yeah, you're right – it's too much. It's not like I've exactly been there for you lately. [DEAN's voice shakes.]

oh no. benny's gettin the ellen/jo/meg treatment too now. no wonder he's bein so charming and sweet, dean's being vulnerable..

BENNY Oh, you don't owe me nothing. Truth is, uh... I could use a break from all this. DEAN It really been that tough? BENNY I'm not a good fit, Dean. Not with vampires and, for sure, not with the humans. I don't belong. And after a while... that starts to wear on you. Right? Cry me a river. Like you need to listen to this. DEAN Well, when you get back up here, we're gonna fix all that, okay? BENNY When I get back? DEAN Yeah, you find the portal, and your ride out of Purgatory with Sam just like you did with me, okay? As soon as I send you back, I'm gonna haul my ass up to Maine, and I'm gonna be waiting there for you when you get topside. BENNY Yeah. That sounds like a plan, chief. Let's get on with it.

ok but talking like that is very... suicidal sounding. and clearly setting up that he's not going to come back. don't like it

sitting here thinking i wasn't expecting to have a sobbing breakdown over benny, why is this so much worse than jo and ellen. and i think it's because like, what he said. about not fitting in with anyone, how it wears on you. those are real life things we (i) deal with. that may also include suicidal ideation. it's not blowing up hellhounds with your daughter who died before she could set it off. yeah the supernatural aspect is what's causing those feelings, but those are very real life feelings too.

to deflect from how i am feeling, something something literally killing your ex to get your brotherhusband back. this is fucking awful.

BOBBY Dean spent a year in this place? SAM Running and fighting, all day, every day. BOBBY Must have been hell on you not being able to get him out all that time. You did try? SAM Look, Bobby, Dean and I had an agreement, okay? BOBBY I know that agreement. I taught you that agreement. That's a non-agreement.

bobby agrees it's out of character

and now benny gets to tell him that he's staying, right. like in the abyss

the abyss (1989)

least we got a hug out of it, i guess

blegh

(i'm a big bag of trauma over someone real close to me that died by suicide, combined with my own depression issues and sometimes stuff like this is a stab in the gut of all that)

[brothersonahotelbed]

omg what a coinkydink i was just thinking of fight club! i had read it right after graduating hs n like… it was the first book i had read in Such A Long Time lol

i hope u enjoy it❣️❣️❣️

!!!!!! i just finished it today and it's like. kind of an understatement when i say i "really enjoyed" something after i read/watch it because when i'm invested in something i put my whole heart, mind, and soul into it and it like. becomes a part of me because i can't ever like things a normal amount. so when i say i thoroughly enjoyed it i really mean the story will live in my bones forever and ever.