#which is personally useless to me like none of these structures should exist

[roobylavender]

If I may ask, what exactly is the issue with the Emotional Spectrum? I'm kind of mixed on the execution, but given the elements of the Green Lantern mythos, it seems like a logical extension.

i don’t think the logical extension of there being an emotional spectrum is what bothers me per se (well. with the star sapphires as a notable exception) i am just not really keen on the idea of there being multiple corps in existence bc it undermines why the existence of even one was so ill-advised and prone to abuses in power. modern green lantern lore in general is very unfocused to me like sure there are some cool ideas wrt space adventures and warring factions and different rings lining up with different life experiences but in the end what i read green lantern comics for was the critical political element and commentary and i don’t see that reflected to quite the same effect in the way johns reworks the mythos

[napolonio]

Do you accept asks? It's okay you can just delete this if you don't. So I've been detaching from ego and at times I feel at peace, then the ego is triggered and I'm back to being anxious. I think I'm expecting this "special" experience to happen like this euphoric feeling, cause I know that I'm not the ego, or whatever it thinks or feels, but I guess I'm expecting the thoughts and feelings to stop completely. And they're still here. Which makes me feel like I'm not detaching correctly lol. Do you mind sharing how you were able to let go of your ego for good? Thanks!

See, I think that many of us will continue to make use of a body, concepts and live in a world of perception, so really, ego will still be there in some shape or form. What you really need to realize is that you are not it.

To understand ego is to understand time. Through life when we operate as a body, we learn concepts, we learn rules, we learn structures, and that's how ego gets shaped. It is used to navigate life. You know that if a car is driving at high speed, you should not cross the street, that's ego. You have learned social qeues so that you can interact with others, that's ego. "If ___ happens I should do ___". It's a literal program. Now, all ego knows is illusory, because it's the past, it no longer exists. You see life through the past, you aren't really in the now, so really what does ego know? How can ego be helpful in the now if it only operates based on something that does not exist?

Say you were betrayed by a friend. What does the ego do? It feels like its sense of identity has been menaced, so it has to defend itself. It internalizes this experience, it keeps the memory and uses it as its favorite accesory. Friends are fake, you're unlucky and everyone betrays you, you need to keep your defenses up. Not only are you giving yourself this identity, but also your friend, perpetuating the whole story thinking that keeping such memory alive in the now, will bring you a different future and keep you safe in the present.

You wouldn't dare forgive your friend. They deserve your cold stare and hatred. What if you thought about forgiving them? Forgiveness not in the conventional way, but in a new meaning. Forgiveness being an act of correction. What forgiveness really is, is the realization that the betrayal was illusory, it was never real, your friend is innocent. Your ego would feel so frightened by the sole idea, it will feel so vulnerable and unprotected. But you can't really stop identification with your own identity, while also keeping alive the menacing stories you have of seeming others. They're not separate from you and how you see them, directly affects you.

As long as you keep alive your labels of this world, its people, the body, you will still continue to need that ego that created this world. It will keep you bound.

The reason why I think mentioning other people is important, is because seeming others is one of the reasons ego exists. Ego sees others as an enemy. You can let them close, but not too much. As long as you keep stories of others, it will have an effect on you. You can't get rid of your own stories and keep others' alive. Because imagine again your betrayer friend, say you think you successfully "let go of your ego" and the friend comes into frame again, you still hold their story, what will happen? What you mentioned in your ask, ego gets triggered, and what does it bring back?? Correct, your identity of being an unlucky person who has fake friends.

This applies for everything you have learned about this world, society, science, objects, history, all of it. None of it is the now. Continuing to see life through those lenses, is to keep the past alive.

So, to conclude ego=past learnings. If you realize all is now, ego becomes useless. If you trust and surrender to your true nature, you can learn to live as God/imagination/consciousness, and cease the contract with the ego.

It's not linear. Personally I'm not a huge fan of trying to rush things, I enjoy patience. Which brings me to my favorite ACIM quote "infinite patience, brings immediate results".

Also, something fun that not everyone on here might be a fan of, challenge yourself to do things you don't usually do because it's soo "out of character". Say you ask for dark coffee every day, now choose the craziest drink in the menu you can think of. Say your bed sheets are always dark colored, buy a bright colored one. Do/say something that makes you cringe. Dress in a way you would never 😈. It's very funny, I do it every day lmao. Challenge your perception of self. If you feel like you can't, start by imagining it. Imagine yourself doing out of character stuff. You'll see you'll naturally stop being the character.

Disclaimer: as I mentioned at the beginning, most likely you will continue to make use of a body, therefore don't put it in situations of danger. It still has to eat (because I've seen some people asking about eating in imagination 🥴), it can't fly, don't cross the street without looking both ways. This work is mental, so don't feel the need to prove something in the "physical", that's very foolish to do, considering that you probably are still attached to the body and your concepts of it and of this world. Meaning it can be endangered if you try to defy those concepts.

[servicetopkaradanvers]

I'm not sure if this is exactly the right place to say this, but I don't know if there is. And you're a smart person and critical thinker who has talked about this before. If this is totally weird, you can just delete it ofc. I've never properly watched Supergirl but I started reading fanfic around the time my mental health got real bad so it was a comfort thing I didn't bring too much thought to. I really identify with Lena and in the past, part of me has understood her actions-

and I know that they're wrong. The anti-alien rhetoric is obviously an allegory for racism or homophobia. She's violated people's basic human rights. And I'm scared that I'm a bad person because sometimes, I kind of get it. Which is insane because i'm a lesbian enby of color, i mean i get targeted by most of the -ist/ism actions. And I'm also too tired to think about things critically all the time. Supercorp was my comfort fic, content thing-

I knew it was problematic (the whole James thing makes me sick to my stomach, scared and sad) but I didn't know that Lena as a character was written that way. The metaphors never really clicked in my head because I never thought about it, but now I feel absolutely horrible about myself because I like and identify with Lena. I'm not really sure how to move on from here- I'm just tired. I wish there could be just one thing, one piece of media that wasn't prejudiced (granted sg is not the place to go if you want decent rep and the like) and all of those things I said earlier. Its just me somehow trying to justify how I felt and empathized with something I shouldn't have. So yeah, sorry that was really long. I hope you have a lovely day- sorry for the spam

FIRST of all, you’re fine, babe! Both in sending me this and in enjoying The Bad Media. That’s my thesis here: You’re fine. With this in mind, let’s unpack this big ol suitcase:

We’re living in a fandom moment where more than ever before, we’re thinking about the ideas we consume in fiction and how they may or may not affect us. This is a net positive! Fiction is not reality, but it undeniably impacts it, so for this and many other reasons, we should always think critically about what resonates with us and why. Does this mean dissecting every facet of something to find all the ways it might fall in line with oppressive power structures? Absolutely not.

You, as an individual, do not owe anyone an explanation for why you enjoy anything. Period. How you relate to a given character or why you like them is nobody's business but your own.

Supergirl, as a piece of media, is singularly awful in its lackluster lipservice to progressivism while simultaneously refusing to deliver any progressive themes. Socially and politically, it is a useless liberal wet dream. Kara is an immigrant from a dead culture working as the muscle for a secret FBI offshoot with zero accountability for all of the other aliens in diaspora she has rounded up and dumped into a cell without trial. Alex is allegedly a lesbian, but the key points of her endgame relationship are constantly deemed not important enough to get screen time, which is made even more absurd when examined from the angle that this series is marketed directly toward LGBT people. An embarrassing percentage of villains on this show are women of color, which is particularly loud when there are only 2 women in the main cast who aren't white. And "main" is extremely generous, given that Kelly is just there to Give Advice Good and everything M'gann says and does is as dry as toast.

My point here is that the whole show is rotted to its roots, and whatever quietly libertarian or even fascism-enabling bullshit they push onto Lena in a given week is par for the crusty, shitty course. Kara deciding that she's ok with the alien detection device because "there are bad aliens" is a lovely (read: awful) microcosm of why this show sucks so fucking hard. "People are entitled to their opinions" is for debates on whether pineapple goes on pizza, not for whether we should casually out, endanger, and disenfranchise our [insert minority metaphor here] because some of them are mean.

But what I would love for this fandom to wrap its head around, and what I hope you understand, anon, is that just because it happens on the show, doesn't mean we have to give a rat's ass about it. What the hell is The Canon, anyway? Especially in the case for Supergirl, which can't even get its own continuity right. Especially for an IP that has been rebooted dozens of times before and will be rebooted again in the future. We can just decide that Lena realized the horrible injustices she enabled through her position of power. We can even decide that they just didn't happen at all! This is all fake. It's not set in stone. Who came up with it, anyway? A network with a list of buzzwords they want included and a couple of D-tier showrunners cranking down caffeine to meet an absurdly tight deadline. It's not special. I can guarantee that you care about it infinitely more than they do, and you haven't even watched the damn show.

On a more personal level, people who are hurt, depressed, or traumatized have always and will always look for themselves in fiction. Myself included! And despite what lofty platitudes there may be on the matter, suffering does not make us kind. It does not make us better. Sometimes it's just suffering. Often it pulls us further from who we are meant to be. Often it just makes us "worse."

Trauma has made Lena emotionally brittle. A lifetime of manipulation and abuse has taught her to compartmentalize herself and lock her feelings behind a maze of doors. When she does let love in, she accepts it so wild and vulnerable that she can't see the red flags behind the rosy lenses. She latches so hard onto people she deems virtuous that she holds them to a standard none could fulfill. Her pain has to go somewhere, so it oozes out of her, into Non Nocere, into the post-reveal rift. She's a powder keg, and Kara spent 4 years shoveling more gunpowder onto the pile while holding the match between her teeth.

And despite these fatal flaws that make perfect sense through the eyes of Lena's trauma, she is so full of love. Like Kara, her suffering did not make her kind. She is kind in spite of her suffering. These are the characters we are drawn to when we're hurting. Lena’s trauma is an inextricable part of her, but it is not all of her, and neither are her mistakes.

There truly is not and never will be a piece of media that is absolutely innocent of the harmful structures thrust upon us by society, because we ourselves also participate in that society whether we are critical of it or not, whether we strive to change it or not. I'm flawed. You're flawed. Bettering ourselves is not a journey toward an ultimate destination of perfection. It is a garden we nurture in an endless labor of love because the joy that comes from seeing it flourish and change vastly outweighs the work we put into it and the weeds popping up around its unkempt edges. This is a lesson Lena herself could probably stand to internalize. Probably with lots and lots of therapy. Lots. And lots.

So, to circle back to the start of this? You're fine. You recognized the logic in a traumatized character's mistakes because our own gravest errors more often than not stem from the ways we have been harmed in the past. It's what makes Lena (or, at the very least, the many adaptations of Lena that exist in this fandom) a good character. She is, to her core, characterized proof that a crumbling foundation and poisonous soil do not define us. Which is why watching her heal and grow and learn a healthier kind of love is so, so wonderful.

In closing, I think it's worth mentioning that being critical of media does not mean that we stop enjoying the parts of it we like. There is a lot of gold to be pulled from the steaming pile of shit that is CW Supergirl, and that's why we're all here in the first place. So I really hope you can continue to enjoy it in whatever way makes you smile <3

[everyonewasabird]

Brickclub 3.5.5 ‘Poverty a good neighbor to misery’

Marius has stopped interacting with the world. He just wanders and dreams. People find him suspicious and off-putting, and he doesn’t notice, or care.

...Except that he dresses up and goes to the parties of his father’s old Bonapartist war buddies. He makes sure his shoes are shiny and presentable for them.

Which is to say: the only people whose opinions Marius bothers with are rich people whose moderate politics he likes. He’s Not on the good path here, and I really, really don’t think we’re supposed to think he is.

The narrator continues to praise without really criticizing. I don’t believe him.

@fremedon​ has pointed out that we’re discovering a new structure in this section, where the narrator praises things very highly, in grandiose terms--and then, after several paragraphs of talking up how great a thing is, he’ll introduce juuuust the slightest little caveat.

And you’re going to want to pay really close attention to the caveat.

In this case, he talks about the purity of Marius’s dreams and how “he had finally come hardly to look at anything but the sky, the only thing that truth can see from the bottom of her well.” Which sounds like a dig to me. He's seeing truth--I don’t believe the narrator outright lies, though he can be sarcastic--but it’s such a tiny sliver of truth as to be useless.

After that, at the end of this chapter, we’re presented with Marius noticing people in distress and performing a single good action by paying the Jondrettes’ rent.

I think that action is the counterargument to everything that came before it in this chapter. He’s glimpsed a tiny sliver of truth, which may even actually be the real truth! What greater thing is there?

NOTICING AND HELPING ACTUAL PEOPLE.

Marius in these post-”to be free” chapters reads to me like Valjean post-bishop. The Amis collectively hit him with a sharp shock that showed him the way he’d been living his life was wrong. They gave him brief directions for turning it around--but both Valjean and Marius can’t fully grok the revelation, so they run away and try to incorporate the new information into the worldview they already had. Marius internalized “to be free,” but he thinks that means perfect, atomized independence, not the interdependence the Amis live by.

In the new world Marius and Valjean glimpsed, the world was equitable and relational rather than transactional, and they didn’t need to be punished anymore. Both of them take it as a message on how to become more alone and punish themselves more effectively.

This second half of the book reads to me like a kind of pop quiz: the messages from part one have been remixed, can you still recognize them even when the narrator intentionally confuses you?

I think Hugo does really believe dreaming is good:

In fact, were it given to our eye of flesh to see into the consciences of others, we should judge a man much more surely from what he dreams than from what he thinks. There is will in the thought, there is none in the dream. The dream, which is completely spontaneous, takes and keeps, even in the gigantic and the ideal, the form of our mind.

I like this as another lens to view character through. With Javert we got the “men’s souls take the forms of the animals” character lens, and now we get the “judge a man by his dreams” character lens. Javert himself has “stern” dreams; Grantaire is the other person who springs to mind as having very telling dreams that tell us something important that his exterior doesn’t.

But neither of them are actually helpful people. Grantaire nullifies himself, but Javert causes immeasurable harm.

Dreams aren’t action, and that’s the point. This chapter ends with Marius suddenly being confronted with 1) other people exist 2) some of them live next door to him and 3) his next door neighbors are being evicted. Without thinking about it, he gives them 25 out of the 30 francs he owns, and it may be the single best thing he ever does.

Which is fascinating, because the absolute worst thing he does also takes the form of giving Thenardier money.

But that second time will be motivated by his stupid, awful internal system of debts and redress and owing everyone for everything. This time, for once, he simply sees and acts, out of compassion.

[lesbomatriarchy]

Hello. I haven’t been on here in a long while. Here are some updates:

- firstly, for those of you who won’t read this entire post, I’m probably abandoning this blog. If you want to keep up with my various art projects, check out @twiceshyincites...am on a bit of a music kick right now, but who knows what I’ll do in the future?

- am still a dyke, just a slightly more stable one now

- I use they/them and she/her pronouns. I’ve noticed that I seem to prefer they/them around people I feel comfortable expressing my gender presentation around, but I don’t think I feel okay saying to use exclusively they/them pronouns. This is okay. I don’t have to choose and I can change my mind in the future.

- I’ve got a girlfriend now. Fell in love through letters/letter-length messages. They’re an artist, among other things. In true lesbian fashion, I’ve entered into an extremely long-distance relationship that I would probably laugh at if it involved anyone but myself. But I can’t help it. I’ve never felt the way I do about this person, and I wouldn’t trade them for anyone in the world. It feels good. It feels right, finally. 

- I’m learning that the idea of an overarching LGBT community is functionally useless in terms of organization-based structural change. It is important to understand that LGBT people exist all over the globe, but to reduce us all as one group is dehumanizing at best. I am not in some secret club based on my gender and sexuality, nor do I want to be. I will not show solidarity to a racist, antisemite, transphobe, etc. simply because we both like women. If we are to form any organization based on a broad spectrum of identities, it must have a specific goal. Otherwise, it is inevitable that we will be distracted by what is considered the “x experience--” the ignorance of which may be distressing but ultimately meaningless compared to the literally life-or-death matters induced by homophobia and transphobia. Someone projecting bullshit onto lesbians, especially butches, is frustrating, but I will not waste time in a useless internet argument about it when my friends are homeless and dying. 

- On that same note, I don’t think it’s possible to have truly trans-inclusive spaces until we understand that women are capable of misogyny. While we should of course focus on victims of prejudice before anyone else, but ultimately all prejudice is internalized to some extent. Sexuality and gender have never determined one’s politics. Or should we pretend Roy Cohn wasn’t horrifically homophobic?

- I mention these things because I think as a young person I needed to believe otherwise. That was what Tumblr, and especially this blog, was about. Shouting I’m gay into the void. Finding a singular similarity with people because we were womenthings or gay or bi or questioning our gender or whatever. And it’s so important to find people who are like you. In a strange way, identity politics sort of saved my life. But I am no longer a scared teenager in tears over the thought that I might be something I had told myself for years I was not. I am a complex person with political beliefs, with religious beliefs, with a particular relationship to my gender that cannot be shared...with a particular relationship to me sexuality that cannot be shared. A particular relationship to myself. There are a million facets of my identity that I finally feel comfortable and confident to explore. 

- I know I have some younger followers on here. If this doesn’t make sense to you, that’s okay. I literally made this blog because I wanted a safe space after coming out as bi (oops). All I wanted to do was draw a girl in rainbow. Put pride flags all over my blog. Discuss how the TV writers were clearly trying to fuck us over. Or give us the content we deserved. Or something. Settle for poorly-written content because it was all we had. And that was what I needed. It may be what you need too. But know that there may be a time when what you need is something a little different, and this will be okay too.

- None of you are unloveable. None of you are completely alone.

- X-Ray Spex still fucks

- Also I got a vibrator. And a weighted blanket. Highly recommend.

- Goodbye

[lost-in-zembla]

Disco Elysium or: How I learned to Stop Wallowing and Love the Game

I will now review a videogame. No real spoilers. Just very vague descriptions below.

My writing this is uncharacteristic of me. I find most writing surrounding the video game industry to be repugnant. The industry (including the media surrounding that industry) relies upon the subsumption of subcultures on the fringe into the very center of the infernal machine where the dedicated and nostalgic nature of its fanbase can be exploited for capital. It’s the same process that produces Iron Man Funko Pops. Call me a jaded and pretentious pseudointellectual poseur, but in the case of Marvel the idea that this fucking billion dollar franchise with the biggest actors in the world somehow retains this guise of this ‘geek’ subculture is disturbing to me.

(If you have played the game Disco Elysium, then you can probably already see part of why I enjoy it so goddamn much.)

I don’t mean we should gatekeep. My point is the media attached to these quote-geek-unquote industries wants to milk the same cash cow (e.g. 10 AWESOME THINGS IN THE LAST OF US 2!) Coming from an academic environment of criticism, I crave at least the appearance of an honest and thorough critique of art. In my experience, you really need to go past the surface to find any reliable ‘takes’ on contemporary videogames. That being said, there’s a lot of good work being done in the form of video essays.

In any case, I play videogames relatively often. Competitive shooters, mostly. But I suffer no story in videogames. Why would I? I read the most *genius* pieces of literature in the English language. I’m too *good* for that. So when I heard all the buzz about Disco Elysium last fall, it fell on deaf ears. Detectives? Disco? Isometry? Story-heavy. Ugh. I’m interested in none of that. But about a week ago, a friend of mine bought the game. Unlike me, he is a real adult with a real job so it was just a whim on his part, I believe. I looked at the game and, with Steam’s lax refund policy in mind, I bought it. In the past week I have put approximately thirty hours into this game. This review is a way for me to explore my own thoughts surrounding the game, thoughts that I didn’t include in my steam review (See below.)

So it was devastating, sure. And this devastation was somehow positive. One thing that I would like to make clear about me talking about this game is that it is fucking useless. Disco Elysium possesses that quality that exists in all great art; it is irreducible. When I try to explain this game to my friends, I find that my words fail to describe what’s so great about the game. Let me give you the elevator review I’ve come up with. *This game has allowed me to explore the breadth of human experience*. It’s an absolutely insane thing to say about a game. The writing, the art style, the story, the world, the RPG gameplay, they all work together to create a kind of experience that I have never encountered in a piece of art before aside from those few, fleeting moments when you feel as though you truly *get* an encyclopedic novel you’re reading (and in my case I usually don’t get it.)

I will not delve too deeply into the mechanics of the game. There are probably plenty of articles and videos that describe the game already. Put simply, the game is about choices. You can choose to solve the murder however you want. You can say absolutely batshit things to people. You can say mildly bemusing things. You can speak apocalyptic prophesies, espouse communism, conservatism, Moralism. race science.. There are moments when you genuinely *feel* like you can say anything, which is quite a feat when you really only have a few dialogue options at any given moment.

As you’ve noticed, this is not a review of the videogame. Playing this game after a tough breakup was sort of earth-shattering. I mean, not only am I navigating through a strange virtual world with its own history and culture and cosmological makeup, I’m diegetically grieving over being left by my *divinely* beautiful ex while I, the player, undergo a similar process and find similar coping mechanisms. Playing this game was like knowing the funniest clown in the world, a clown so funny that you thank him when he occasionally punches you in the chest to make you *feel things*.

The plan wasn’t to make a character whose qualities reflected my own. I just wanted to play the game. I wanted to win. It just so happened that because *I* was the one playing the game, the character essentially turned into me. It doesn’t help that I, too, have had my issues with alcohol, drugs, commitment, and mental health (in no particular order). The character ended up becoming *me* in a way that I’d never experienced before. I faced ethical dilemmas. My ideology was shaken. This game achieves unbelievable mimesis.

Here’s the wild thing: this game has changed me. I feel like a thirteen-year-old white boy who just watched The Boondock Saints and got a pretty okay over-the-pants handjob at the same time. I’m thinking about my life in terms of choices. The game enforces a kind of perspective of the world that highlights its contingency and the permanence of choices. You can, of course, save your progress in the game and reload whenever, but I found myself just sort of riding out the bad choices I made unless they were game-ruiningly catastrophic. (E.g. I had a “thought” equipped that made me fail every unrepeatable *red* check during a pivotal firefight; it was a hilarious disaster. We were essentially mowed down.) I stood by most of my bad choices. After all, I made the choice using the information I had at the time.

I am not good at this game. I absolutely bungled the investigation. I was just a pawn for forces far greater than myself. Seven people died, and I know that I could’ve saved a few of those people, if not all of them. I think about it sometimes. I think about what I could have done, how I could have gone deeper to find out what’s *really* going on, how I could take control of the investigation rather than be taken control of. Maybe I’ll play the game through again, but the first playthrough is kind of magical if you know absolutely nothing about the game like I did. If not for an absolute deus ex machina at the end, I would have been taken to the madhouse. It would have been an unbelievable failure.

During that deus ex machina moment, by the way, a goddamn tear rolled down my cheek. Yeah, I’m in a rough place, personally. But I don’t *cry* over characters in art. They’re not real. But damn if that changed.  I tell you it’s changed *me*. I care more for characters. I know they’re not real but they represent something that I can relate to, no matter who they are. This game has made me think about empathy more. Maybe it’s because I dumped all my points in the emotional skills. Maybe I’d be more violent if I rolled with the physical skills. Maybe I’d feel like a superstar if that’s what I chose to pursue in the game. Disco Elysium feels open-ended enough that if you sign up for the story, the aesthetic, and the investigation itself, then you can get whatever you want out of the experience. The game, again, achieves incredible mimesis.

The mimesis is so convincing in Disco Elysium that it feels as open-ended as reality, with one caveat: you *know* it's a game. You, as a player, know that the experience of Disco Elysium is a designed one, that it was created as a sort of origami structure, that there is narrative and, god help us, *meaning*. What this game-knowledge afforded me during my playthrough was the constant sensation of synchronicity. I found myself saying “I don’t know how this element will fold into the grand structure of the game, and it almost seems impossible that it should become part of the investigation narrative.” But because I know it’s a game, I am graced with the confidence of the highly religious. Everything will come together in the end.

This is not a review for a videogame. This is a confession. I am deeply flawed and I want to change that. My worldview has been shaken because of a videogame. I don’t want to be that kind of animal anymore.

I’m trying to empower myself, to become more aware that my choices do indeed matter, have always mattered. I’m trying to be more pragmatic, to consider the things I want to do in terms of their result rather than the momentary pleasure I will derive from doing them. Now *that’s* a change for me. 

I’m trying to be more empathetic, more willing to imagine the perspectives of others. 

I am trying to give the world around me the benefit of the doubt. It is easy for me to think of the world as a random coincidence of matter, but if you look at the world with totality in mind everything seems to take on this Spinozan glow of divinity. The human mind is a meaning-making machine, I think. If I look at the world as fundamentally devoid of meaning, then that is still meaning. It is nihil-ism. It’s still an -ism. But if I ascribe to the world a kind of glowing potential, as though meaning were to be found in every speck of matter, then I feel invited to participate in this massive dance that we’re all a part of. 

I’m trying to be more adventurous, because beneath the surface of things there seems to be a vast network of relationships, causation, possibility and, god help me, *story*. Or maybe it’s not beneath the surface of things, maybe there is no Deleuzian schizophrenic depth beneath the surface, perhaps the world is a homogenous and ever-developing surface upon which I constellate meaning and, thereby, create it. I’m trying to create a story for myself that will hold a candle to my experience playing Disco Elysium. I didn’t ask for this; it was just what I needed. It was, in a word, unforgettable.

[exmcr-moved]

REALLY gets my goat when people choose math specifically to target when it comes to “things not being real”— like i know it’s an easy target. schools don’t teach it well, it’s put up on this pedistal of being a “smart person only” thing, it’s prioritized over literally every other subject save maybe science so there’s a huge pressure to invest in it when it’s taught terribly so it causes a lot of people to burn out, etc.

but there’s a part of me that’s like, alright. math isn’t some magical concept that people just simply Decided should be a thing one day. i mean, it is and it isn’t. because of course it had to start somewhere. but math exists in the world around you without having words to describe what’s happening. cuz that’s exactly what it is, describing. and i think this is the first issue with how math is taught: it’s taught abstractly. almost every other subject you can tie to a specific goal. when am i going to use this? why is this important? most other subjects can give you an answer. math, on the other hand, most people end up confounded. when am i going to use calculus? and i concede— probably never, but that’s not calculus’s fault. math, at it’s core, is an exploration of how things function. one thing i like about math is how the laws can’t actually be broken. like, yes, if you add two things together, you’re always going to have that sum of numbers. but that’s not because it was Spoken into Existence, We Agreed Those Were The Rules, and That Was That. no! it’s because we, as humans, looked with curiosity into the way the world functioned and said, oh, every time i increase this by some number, i have that number of things! if there were ever a case where that weren’t true, the law would adapt. it’s the same thing with science— the law of gravity can’t be broken, it was a law that describes a felt experience. if that experience were to change, so would the law, because the experience comes first.

it’s the same with almost everything in society. the rules we make up are only how we communicate what is already being felt. words, language, social structure, money, math, gender, all of that! they’re all collections of symbols to describe experiences to communicate. and they’re all constantly changing and adapting when society proposes new rules, or faces new situations to adapt to it.

the difference with math, i would say, is that lower level math (at least, in the way it’s taught), doesn’t change much at all. plus, it’s harder to feel that difference when it mostly occurs in specialized fields. especially since a lot of those changes happen over centuries, so, say, if it doesn’t change much in the 20 years you’ve been alive, then it must never change! but it does! people are researching math daily in the same way that people are experiencing new things daily, since math is just a specialized language to express experiences.

and at the same time, when math DOES change, there’s an uproar about how it’s supposed to be math! it’s supposed to be a fundamentally perfect and stable system, right? well, no, because again, there could be a new experience, a new way to express that. a change in language could mean a change in math, because they’re both based on expressions. so many comedians attack “new math”— while at the same time, on the opposite end, comedians make fun of “2+2 could equal fish for all i care, it could change on a dime because nothing in math matters!”

i think the most frustrating part is there is some validity to that. yes, you could redefine math that way, but you’re also redefining fish, and i know that’s a joke. but sometimes it’s disheartening, i guess. i’ll see maybe a rant on why words are just noises we choose to give meaning, which means none of it matters, but there’s some disconnect between this revelation and the revelation that We Could Just Change Math? the point is they’re social constructs! so of course they can have fluid interpretations. but that’s the beauty of it. math partially does just have meaning because we give it meaning, but we gave it that meaning born out of a drive and a curiosity to share our experiences. the same goes for words! and that’s a wonderful and beautiful thing to me, not something that’s meaningless. not something that calls for the uselessness of math. it calls for an admiration of the human experience, that nothing is too small for a human to care about, name, and share.

[ilu-writes]

Face Paint

Days and Nights (Solangelo)

Ratings: G | Warnings: none

AO3 | FF.net

Prev | x | Next

Will gets help with his costume from an unexpected source.

“I need you to make me look terrifying,” said Will, watching as Nico opened the cheap face paints. “It’s a matter of pride.”

Nico was probably the last person he would’ve considered asking for help with this, but the other boy had offered as soon as Will had complained to him about being bad at it.

Will had taken one look at the younger boy, who looked like he’d never touched a paintbrush in his life, and had said yes immediately, because he was that desperate to spend time with him.

At the very least, if the face painting went badly, he’d get to enjoy Nico’s company for a while.  

“Pride?” Repeated Nico, raising an eyebrow curiously.

“Me and Lou Ellen have an ongoing competition over who can get the scariest costume,” Will explained, trying to suppress the slight embarrassment he felt. It seemed immature now that he was saying it out loud. “Lou always cheats with the mist, though.”

“Ah,” said Nico, who didn’t sound like he thought it was immature. “I’ll do my best.”

He picked up the sponge, coated with paint, and reached forward, letting his hand hover about an inch away from Will’s face. The briefest, unreadable look flicked across his face, and Will was about to ask if something was wrong when Nico closed the distance.

“You might want to close your eyes,” he said, his voice surprising flat.

Will complied. They sat in comfortable silence for either a few seconds or a few minutes – Will really couldn’t tell – before his discomfort at the feeling of paint got too irritating.

“You should come,” he blurted out, partially out of desperation to start a conversation, and partially because he’d been wanting to ask all day. “Out with us, I mean. It’ll be fun.”

Nico didn’t respond for so long that Will cracked one of his eyes open to try and gauge his reaction. He was looking away, at the paint palette, focusing on covering one of the brushes with paint, so it was useless. Will was about to take the offer back out of panic when Nico turned towards him, and he immediately squeezed his eyes shut again. The brief image of the other boy, his face arranged in the mild, emotionless expression he was used to, stayed burned onto his eyelids.

“That’s okay,” Nico said, his tone careful. “I’d rather stay in.”

Will bit his tongue to stop himself insisting. If he would rather stay on his own, that was fine. He couldn’t force the other boy to spend time with him.

He could, however, enjoy this time he had now.

“No problem,” he said, keeping his own voice level. His mind flailed wildly for another topic of conversation. “How- uh- what-“ he paused to mentally collect himself. “So, you like Halloween, huh?”

It didn’t come out quite as smooth as he’d wanted, but Nico didn’t comment on that. “I, uh, don’t dislike it,” he said, his voice quiet with concentration. “I haven’t really celebrated it before, but-“

“You haven’t?” Will’s eyes flew open of their own accord. For a second, he was staring straight at Nico, and then the other boy averted his own gaze to the paint palette to unnecessarily recoat the brush. “Sorry,” said Will quickly, closing his eyes again. “I just- you haven’t?”

There was a beat. “No,” said Nico, his voice a little uncertain. “I don’t… I don’t think I did, I don’t remember it.”

Oh. Oh.

Will mentally cursed himself. Of course Nico wouldn’t remember celebrating Halloween. He didn’t even remembering celebrating his own birthday. And somehow, Will didn’t think the boy stopped for trick or treating while he was living homeless away from Camp.  

“Sorry,” he said, guilt leaking into his voice. “Sorry, I didn’t- I didn’t think-“

“It’s fine,” said Nico smoothly. “It’s not a- it’s fine. I don’t… think they celebrate Halloween in Italy anyway. At least… not until recently.”

They fell into silence again. This time, Will didn’t bother trying to talk again – he was clearly awful at it – and instead resigned himself to the silence. Also, to the tickling of the paintbrush on his face.

So he was more than surprise when Nico was the one to finally break it.

“I did kind of celebrate once in, um, boarding school,” he said awkwardly. Will stayed silent. “Not much, because, y’know, military school, but we were aloud to stay up a bit later and eat a lot of sweets, so… yeah.”

Will waited a few seconds to make sure Nico had actually stopped talking, and then a few more to make sure he didn’t sound like an idiot. He hadn’t actually know Nico had gone to a military school, but he decided not to address that. “The candy is the best part of Halloween,” he said, lightly. “Really, it’s the only good tradition.”

“I don’t think the costumes are that bad,” hummed Nico gently in response, and the corner of Will’s lips twitched up.

“I already told you, I’m awful at the costumes,” he reminded the other boy. “I didn’t peg you as someone who’d be into them, either.” He tried to keep his tone light, praying it wouldn’t come off like an insult. The last thing Nico needed was to feel like he was being laughed at.

“I’m not that into them,” he amended, sounding a little embarrassed, but not like he thought he was being mocked. “I probably wouldn’t wear one, but I think they look fun.”

“They are fun,” he conceded. “I just suck at them, so it’s a lot of stress.”

“Maybe it’s ‘cause you’re trying to be too scary?” Offered Nico, humour tinging his voice, and the sound was almost nice enough for Will to miss his words.

“Are you saying I can’t look scary?” He asked, exaggerating his offence.

“I’m not- I’m just saying, you aren’t exactly a scary person-“

“I could be!”

“Sure.” Nico pressed two fingers to the other boys chin to tilt it up slightly to give him a better angle, and Will tried to ignore the jolt of electricity that ran through his body at the contact. “I’m just saying, maybe you’d be better coming up with… well, not-scary costumes.”

“I cannot believe that you don’t think I could be scary,” said Will, trying to keep his humorous tone even. “My own friend.”

“I’m just saying-“

“This is disgraceful-“

“Gods,” Nico snorted, and Will suppressed the flutter that rose in his chest at the sound. “Maybe you did inherit your dad’s confidence-“

“How dare you?” Demanded Will, but his voice cracked in the middle, half a laugh escaping him.

Nico shushed him lightly. “I need you to stay still for this bit,” he said, still sounding amused.

“That’s cheating,” huffed Will. “This conversation isn’t over.”

He shut his mouth anyway, letting Nico do whatever he was doing. After a second, he cracked his eyes open slightly, peering through his lashes. The other boy had a look of concentration on his face, somewhat marred by the smile tugging at his mouth, nose crinkled up a little, his dark eyes staring intently at Will’s lips– at the paintbrush.

Will quickly closed his eyes again, trying to silently force his heart rate to slow down. He mentally scolded himself – nothing was going to happen with Nico until the other boy indicated in anyway that it could. There was no use getting flustered over nothing.

Still, when Nico announced that he was done, Will almost wished he could keep his eyes shut for longer. He opened them anyway, taking in the other boy, who’d moved back to a more comfortable distance and was watching him almost nervously.

“There’s a mirror in the bathroom,” he supplied, uncertainly. “For you to look at it.”

“Great,” said Will, surprised by his own sudden disappointment, and he pushed himself up and towards the bathroom. Nico followed a safe few paces behind.

Will nearly did a double take when he saw his own reflection. “Damn,” he blurted, which wasn’t quite as elegant as he would’ve liked, but it worked. The base coat was a pale, eerie green, with the structure of a skull brought out in different shades as a 3d form. Black and dark green had been added in certain places to create the appearance of hollows in it.

“It’ll, uh, probably look better in the dark,” said Nico, and it was definitely nervousness in his voice.

“Better?” repeated Will, surprised, and then he pulled the black hood of his robes up to complete the affect and turned towards him. “Holy Styx – this is amazing.”

Nico looked pleasantly surprised, but quickly and visibly schooled his features back into a more neutral look. “I mean, you wanted it to be creepy-“

“You’re good at creepy. Maybe you are more scary than me.”

“Was that ever in question?”

Will ignored him. “Where did you learn to do this?” He asked, curiosity leaking into his voice. “I didn’t expect you to like this kind of stuff.”

Nico shrugged, and Will was pretty sure he didn’t imagine the tinge of pink that hit his cheeks. “I, uh, used to do a lot of painting at school. I was never that good at it, but I was better at that than the other subjects, because…” He trailed off, shoving his hands in his pockets. “It was just more fun than difficult. But I could paint some stuff, especially on skin. It wasn’t too hard.”

“You could paint well.” Will got the feeling that they were entering more dangerous territory, so he shifted it slightly. “The design-“

“It’s from a Mythomagic card,” Nico admitted immediately. “I figured it was suitably scary.”

“It is.” Will grinned at him, and after a second, Nico returned the gesture. It looked almost painful coming from him, but Will took it. “You know, you could come,” he said, wistfully thinking back to their first conversation. He was pretty sure of what response he’d get, but it was worth a try. “The invitation still exists.”

“I think I’d rather stay in tonight,” said Nico, gently. “But… thanks.”

“Alright.” Will knew not to push dead conversations. Sometimes. “In that case, I should-“

“Yeah- yeah, of course.”

Part of Will wanted to say or do more, but Nico had moved out of his way and he couldn’t think of anything on the spot, so instead he just smiled and made his way to the door. He hesitated half way across the door.

“Nico-“ he paused as the other boy looked over at him. “Thank you.”

Nico shrugged. “Don’t think about it,” he said dismissively, waving it off. “It’s no problem.”

Will got the feeling he was going to be thinking about it for way too long, but he didn’t say that.

[veryfashionabledesigns]

Analyzing the Snicket Aesthetic, Part 1/5: Time Period, Technology, and Medicine

.-There are quite a few fan theories placing the main events of ASOUE in the 80’s or 90’s, which is plausible, if not quite probable, in terms of the technology present in the series and the timing of the real-life publication of the books. On the other hand, I’m a shameless hipster and I live for that retro aesthetic, so I like the ambiguity.

-The post-post-apocalyptic theory is a fun one, but it can be a little limiting—not to mention difficult—to apply too many practical implications to this universe. Realism is all well and good, but it can easily be discarded for the sake of a good yarn or a pointed bit of commentary.  

Figure 1: The Illustrations of ASOUE are mostly influenced by the woodblock prints that frequently appeared in Victorian fiction--black and white, hatched shading, realistic perspective—while those of ATWQ vaguely resemble Modernist and/or Cubist art—subtle color, solid shadows, and slightly warped perspective.

(Continued under the cut)

        -Anachronisms everywhere, of course.  One of the books mentions a blacksmith and a computer repair shop in the same sentence. Events and media from before, during, or (infrequently) after the date range are regularly referenced.

        -Personally, I mix and match from a date range of about 1890-1980, for reasons we’ll get into over the course of this analysis, although this is really quite a large range, and even then it’s rather approximate, and can change depending on which version of the story one is referencing, and even from book to book or character to character.

-Time does not pass normally like in the real world. The atmosphere of ASOUE feels a bit older (gothic, vaguely turn of the century) than that of ATWQ (noir, 1930’s-40’s), but the latter is set before the former (see fig. 1). History has been run through a blender set to puree.

TECHNOLOGY

        -It’s sort of lowkey steampunk/dieselpunk. Relatively little sci fi tech is floating loose in the world, but given the materials and time, Violet would almost certainly come up with some fun retro-futuristic inventions.

        -Violet’s inventions involve mechanical and electrical technology, but seemingly nothing digital. She’s largely indifferent (and in the books, possibly even disdainful) in response to the “advanced computer” at Prufrock Prep, which always struck me as a bit odd. Maybe she distrusts Nero’s vague assertions that it will deter Count Olaf, maybe she prefers a more hands-on approach to inventing, or maybe she has the soul of cranky old lady.

Figure 2: Prufrock’s advanced computer in the Netflix series features cameras, a CRT monitor, and something resembling an oscilloscope.

        -Computers exist in this universe, but they don’t seem to do much, and there aren’t very many of them. Smart phones, laptops, and similar devices of the 21st century are almost certainly not around.

-In the books, Prufrock’s computer can display a recognizable image of Count Olaf and is compared to a toad in appearance, meaning it was likely modeled after PCs from the 80s and 90s.

-In the series, it’s even more anachronistic. The monitor looks more or less like what was described in the books, but it also comes fitted with a built in camera, much like a modern webcam, and can recognize faces about as well as most characters (although this really isn’t saying much), implying some kind of primitive deep learning capacity.  

Figure 3: A few computers that could fit in the Snicketverse. (The Apple 1, hilariously, is the real thing.)

-If the internet exists, it’s pretty useless. The first season of the Netflix series has a few references to the internet, none of which are relevant to the plot. The internet makes everything easier, and the Snicketverse is all about inconvenience and suffering.  

-Photographs appear in both black and white and color, although the color is quite grainy. The shift to color photography occurred gradually throughout the 20th century.

-Hector’s self-sustaining hot air mobile home is really quite impractical, if not impossible. A proper hot air balloon would require quite a bit of fuel to keep the air inside the balloons sufficiently hot. Historically, airships of comparative size would have filled their balloons with hydrogen and/or helium, which, barring leakage or other damage, could actually remain buoyant more or less indefinitely. Hydrogen, by the way, is very flammable.

-The submarines in The Grim Grotto are steampunk as heck—that is, realistically impractical but really friggin’ cool—likely inspired by early science fiction such as Twenty Thousand Leagues Under the Sea. In real life, submarines rarely have portholes; in warfare or high water pressure, they could potentially be a weak point, and they’re fairly pricy for something that isn’t strictly necessary. There are a few exceptions, though, such as in subs designed for tourism or marine biology.

Figure 4: The Quequeg has a number of features solely for the comfort of its crew, such as this lovely library with paintings and antique-looking lamps. The use of brass and copper tones, as well as the warm lighting reminiscent of gas, oil, or early incandescent lights, also add to the steampunk vibes.

-Mobile phones do not appear in the books. As with the internet, they’re just too convenient. Should they be necessary to your story, however, there are a few ways to work them in. The movie featured telephones built into cars, which is actually pretty cool. In real life, portable phones have existed since at least the 1960s, although they were too large and expensive to be popular with the public until recently.

Figure 5: The Radio Common Carrier, a sort of mobile phone introduced in the 1960s.

MEDICINE

        -If Heimlich Hospital is typical of the Snicketverse, then the medical technology of the time is… not good.

        -For all the bureaucracy and paperwork depicted, there seems to be very little control over what sorts of operations are actually performed. Count Olaf can waltz in and say he needs the operating theater for a “cranioectomy,” and nobody seems to question it. It’s entirely possible that the amount of paperwork required is so massive that nobody can really keep track of it all.

        -Patients at Heimlich Hospital often ask volunteers for simple things like a glass of water—implying that the hospital is severely understaffed.

        -It is unknown what happens if a Volunteer is seriously injured in the line of duty. V.F.D. may have its own medics/infirmaries. Alternately, they may try to recruit medical professionals who will treat patients without revealing any secrets. It is also possible that volunteers are expected to lie to their doctors, or that the healthcare system is such a mess that nobody really asks questions when someone turns up with a suspicious injury.

        -There is some good news: near the beginning of The Hostile Hospital, Klaus mentions antibiotics and shots (likely referring to vaccines). From this we can assume that many of history’s nastiest plagues (i.e. tuberculosis, cholera, scarlet fever, etc.) are more or less under control. (Although I personally headcannon that Mr. Poe’s cough is an early symptom of tuberculosis, as this would be a fun little shout-out to Edgar Allen Poe.)

        -The rusty knives used in Violet’s “surgery” imply that doctors could get away with some pretty lousy sanitation. In the Netflix series, the entire hospital is filthy.           

Figure 6: The operating theater in The Hostile Hospital is similar in structure, if not style, to the one at the Old Operating Theatre museum, built c.1822.

-Public operating theaters like the one seen in the Hostile Hospital were gradually replaced by sterile operating rooms as doctors developed proper understanding of germ theory between c. 1860-1900. (See fig. 6). Notably, the set design for the operating theater in the series uses a 19th century layout with mid-20th century materials and lighting.

        -Treatment for mental health conditions is given little attention, which is troubling; sooner or later those poor kids are going to need some therapy. If memory serves, one of the patients at Heimlich is described as looking sad but otherwise healthy, suggesting depression.

        -Given how dystopian the Snicketverse is, PTSD and anxiety are probably quite common—especially among V.F.D. members, who often wind up in very dangerous situations at very early ages. In fact, one could make a solid argument that childhood trauma might be behind the neuroses of characters such as Aunt Joesephine or Hector—both of whom, despite having severely debilitating anxiety disorders, never seem to receive any treatment.

FANTASY ELEMENTS

         -There are very few of these, but it’s far from realism. Some rough rules of thumb would be to avoid things typically considered supernatural (i.e. dragons, ghosts, vampires), but things that are not quite possible (i.e. babies can bite through concrete, reptiles can be trained to imitate human speech on command), or possible but very improbable (i.e. a harmless snake being officially named “the Incredibly Deadly Viper” solely for pranking purposes, a phony surgeon convincing a crowd that decapitation is a risky but necessary medical procedure) are all well and good.

         -It should be noted, however, that at least a few characters in-universe believe in the supernatural. In the Ersatz Elevator, the Baudelaires are briefly mistaken for ghosts, and in The End, Ishmael claims to predict the weather using magic.

[oc-rehab-centre]

[HNK OC Review] Sapphire

Hey there guys, gals and other gendered pals! This account has been rather quiet as of late, wouldn’t you say? A shame indeed, although we received our first public OC review request today. While the user would prefer to be left anonymous on this post, this review is available for you and them to read through. So sit down, relax and let’s do a quick review of this Houseki No Kuni OC!

Part 1 - Biography Analysis

+ some quick words in advance!

What there was to read of Sapphire’s bio was admittedly scarce. The amount of information chalked up to about 1 page and just over 500 words. While shorter character biographies are quicker to read and easier to get through - I’m a firm believer that when it comes to telling your OC’s story and telling us about them, more is always great! I would definitely suggest adding more to this bio and there are several templates for OC bios available on platforms like DeviantART and Amino.

Also, apologies if I’m mistaken, but it looks as if this and the other piece of Sapphire sent to me were created in an avatar/anime dress-up game. I’d advise instead of doing this, perhaps drawing your OC yourself or requesting/commissioning artwork from an artist instead. It just adds something more original and personal to your art and OC, plus there’s more creativity that way!

Name: Sapphire Nicknames: Saphy, the Blue Angel, Jewel

There is already a canon “Sapphire” in the Houseki No Kuni universe. However, this isn’t a huge problem. Perhaps add a colour, shade or type into her name to distinguish her from the canon character. For example, there are various diamonds in Houseki No Kuni: Diamond, Yellow Diamond and Red Diamond. Perhaps you can distinguish your Sapphire from the canon “Sapphire”. Below is a picture of some shades of sapphire and I think “Cornflower” or “Kashmir” might fit your character the best.

Credit: SpiralMuse.org

As for your character’s nicknames, perhaps add some more context, like:

Who refers to Sapphire by these names? 

How did she earn these nicknames?

Does she like these nicknames?

I believe doing so would add some more dimension to your character. It would show the reader how she fits into the universe and can even allow them to determine things about their character before even reading through the entire bio. Also, I don’t think that the Gems would know what an “angel” is, given they don’t seem to have much of a grasp on human religion albeit mythological creatures stemming from these religions. 

Age: Between 200-250 years old

Species: Sapphire

While I can’t say a straight-up “no” to this being an answer to this question, sapphire wouldn’t qualify as your character’s species. For this category, I’d suggest writing “Gem” or “The Bone”, as those are the most common names for the species’ of the crystalline characters in Houseki No Kuni. My apologies, just a nitpick!

Strength: 9

Sexual Orientation: Straight

Appearance: Sapphire is a blue gem with long flowing hair tied up in a ponytail. Everyone likes Sapphire’s hair because it is very sparkly and shimmers a lot in battle, making them hard to miss when they fight the Lunarians. Sapphire’s eyes are also blue. Sapphire has markings on her face which appear when she’s very angry at the Lunarians, and they don’t go away until Rutile comes to calm her down. Sapphire doesn’t like these markings but Sensei says that they make her special, but it doesn’t make her like them any more though. Sapphire has large wings made out of wax and pieces of silver that were made by Rutile, which she uses to fly and cut through her enemies with. 

To begin this, in the two images that I was sent with this biography, there is very little consistency in the design, which I reckon is because the customization options varied between the two used games/apps(?). Nothing hints to this character having a wardrobe of outfits and I believe that more care should’ve gone into at least ensuring the design didn’t change so drastically and like this. Like I said, drawing it yourself or asking for art from another person can make a larger difference than you may think!

Now as for what is stated here in this portion of the bio, it is admittedly very cluttered and rather disorganized. The sentence structures are rather awkward in nature and seem to jump from one topic to the other. (eg. Rutile calming her down and Sensei’s opinion on her markings.) A few pieces of this information could definitely be removed from the “appearance” section and placed into another, like “personality” or “relationships”. Please stay true to the fact that this is an “appearance” description and not a description of everything under the sun.

There is a strong emphasis on Sapphire’s beauty and strength in this portion, which is alright, although it comes off as just slightly conceited. (Though I think I’m alone on that stance, nor was mentioning that opinion truly important lmao.) I have a slight problem with her two most apparent traits, I will confess. Sapphire’s facial markings and wings. 

What struck me as odd about the facial markings is that such things have never been seen in the canonverse, it just seems so alien and frankly unnecessary. The markings are cited as only showing up when she is angry and sound as though they serve no sense or purpose other than displaying this single fact. While there is a potential for some interesting OC lore, I would personally suggest removing this feature unless you have a logical way of explaining their presence on her face/body.

The gems also wear thick coats of powder across their bodies, remember? If these markings were anywhere, I imagine they’d exist within/on Sapphire’s crystalline body and would struggle to show up through this powder... This concept is just very confusing and I can’t think of any logical reasons/examples to give you that would make them work. 

Now for the wings, it’s obvious that this was inspired by the Greek tale of Icarus. I personally think that your concept is interesting but it brings up many questions, both for the sake of character-building and well, science.

Why would Rutile create Sapphire a set of wings? How come none of the other Gems get their own wings? Did it take Sapphire time to learn how to use their new wings? In Houseki No Kuni, the laws of physics are constantly defied, but seeing a character flying with wings made from a metal that is 655 lb per cubic foot seems like science the creators wouldn’t push against... Ahem, anyways, I believe these are questions you should explore if you plan on keeping the implemented features there. 

Personality: Sapphire is an emotionless character who is very strong and works alone whenever she can. She thinks that she is too dangerous to work alongside other Gems because she could hurt them when she gets angry or made in battle. This is why Sapphire asks to work alone. Sapphire also wants to protect her friends very much and that’s why she’s always so angry at the Lunarians for taking away the other Gems. Sapphire also competes a lot with Phos because they’re both strong Gems only Sapphire is more loyal and useful to Sensei more than Phos was. Sapphire also doesn’t like Padparashadda very much because Padparashada isn’t helpful to Sensei either when he’s asleep all the time, and because he makes Rutile really upset which Sapphire doesn’t like.

Emotionless, hm? Given the fact that she supposedly have markings that trigger as a result of an emotion (anger), I would hardly go to say she’s emotionless. In this paragraph, she’s listed as: angry, protective, competitive, loyal and passionate - all of which are emotions. 

Just like in the “appearances section”, there is information in this paragraph that would fit better elsewhere, like her relationships with the listed characters, whose affinity and history with are never explained in this bio. 

I think that there are definitely more traits you could add to Sapphire’s personality. She is rather simplistic and I believe there is a lot of potential for her to be much more. Perhaps read about sapphires and find out what they symbolize for some inspiration or even randomly generate personality traits/attributes in online generators! Spice things up a little, make this OC more personal, make them feel more real.

Likes: Sensei, killing Lunarians, blue roses, King, her wings, being strong, the night time Dislikes: Phos, Padparashadda, when the lunarians get away, seeing broken gems, getting very angry

Powers: She has wings that let her fly and attack the Lunarians in order to make sure they cannot return back to the moon. Sapphire is stronger than Phos

Another useless piece of info, but you’ve spelt Padparadscha wrong a number of times. It’s not so hard to do a quick spellcheck! I probably sound like a broken record, but the wings continue not to make much sense to me, and I think you need to revisit the concept a little more. Given how you explained them, they sound very very powerful, seemingly strong without consequence. Also, the fact that Sapphire is stronger than Phos would be more believable and intriguing if Sapphire had clearer motifs and a more developed personality. 

Her likes and dislikes are rather generic, which admittedly broke my interest a little. I’d suggest adding some likes and dislikes that reflect Sapphire’s character a little better than her love for murdering the Moon People. 

The characters she likes and dislikes also may leave the reader curious. Though you went into slight detail about why Sapphire and Phosphophyllite aren���t besties, seeing more info on relationship with Sensei, Padpa and the aforementioned Rutile would be great. 

Backstory: Sapphire was born on the Cord Shore and taken to the school by Sensei. Sapphire liked to cling to Sensei because she saw him as a father and always wanted to please him. When Sapphire was growing up, Sensei could tell that she was powerful when he saw Sapphire’s markings, which showed up when she got mad after seeing some gems return to the building broken by the Lunarians. Sensei let Sapphire fight earlier because he knew she could protect the gems with her hardness and her ability. One day, Sapphire was in battle but the Lunarians escaped too quickly, making her very angry. Rutile gave Sapphire a gift which was a set of wings made out of wax and silver so that the Lunarians could never escape her again. Sapphire’s wings were so powerful she didn’t have to use a sword anymore and could take down even more Lunarians every day with only her wings. 

*inhales*

Oh boy. 

Ok, uh, I feel as though Sapphire’s backstory makes her seem like a very very special snowflake - something you should never strive for with a character. Sensei and Rutile both seem to be out of character, as both seem to feed Sapphire what she wants with a silver spoon... She seems like a bratty chosen one and I can’t say this backstory will sit well with everyone. 

There’s so little here that it makes me question a lot, and it frustrates me that’s there isn’t more to justify the choices and thoughts of Sensei and Rutile. Why did Sensei see such potential in Sapphire? Why would Rutile craft wings for Sapphire? Why did Sapphire get away with working alone?

There’s just so much left unanswered and unexplained... Please, if you ever decide to work on this, please add more and fill in these enormous holes. Adding a timeline would help with the pacing because when all of this is happening and at what ages Sapphire was when these events happened isn’t specified, adding to the confusion. 

Fun Fact

Sapphire has never gotten broken before but she is curious about what it feels like. 

Sapphire wraps herself in her wings when she sleeps.

Haha that first piece of trivia is rather cute. It reminds me of being young, seeing a friend with a cast and wondering what it feels like to break an arm or a leg. I think that’s really cute! The second - well, you already know my stance on the wings ^^’

Notes + Summary

If there is one thing that always sucks about fandom OCs, it’s that the fandoms always impose restrictions on creativity. In the case of Sapphire, I feel that a lot of the creative choices would definitely work to her benefit, but in the world of Houseki No Kuni, several aspects of her character feel unnatural and vague. 

Anyways, here’s a reiteration of my main points from this review.

Please add more to this bio! There wasn’t a whole lot of information in this bio, certainly not enough for Sapphire to be considered a fleshed out OC. As a result of how short this bio is, there are a lot of holes and a lot left unexplained. There is a lot of potential for this OC to be bettered by filling in those holes wisely! You can look online for a template to find section headings you’re missing, like: relationships, statistics, etc.

Getting your own images would be pretty great! Artists are always better than doll maker games!

Altering her name just a little by a colour prefix (eg. “Cornflower Sapphire”, “Kashmir Sapphire”, etc.) would differentiate her from the canon blue Sapphire. 

The removal or better explaining of the facial markings and wings would definitely be beneficial if you want to make her fit better into the series. 

Sapphire is written like a special snowflake, she’s practically written like a protagonist and seems to directly challenge Phos. Perhaps tone down the amount of special features she has, there’s nothing wrong with being just average. Sometimes, looking and behaving like a wallflower can make an OC better?

Explaining Sapphire’s connections with her peers in greater detail would be beneficial, considering they seem to baby her a fair bit. 

Overall, I’d give Sapphire an overall rating of 3.5/10. There just wasn’t a whole lot to work off of from this bio and what’s there is admittedly not superb. I hope this doesn’t discourage you from creating OCs and encourages you to make some changes to Sapphire. As I said, I see a lot of potential in her, as long as you fill in those holes in her bio and correct what is flawed in a way that makes sense and seems natural. 

That’s all for this review, Ciao!

[hohbct]

A Ramble From My Assessment!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8BV3n2qKSAQ for the assessment in question! Literally just taking what I had in the description and pasting it back here since I ran out of characters to type more:

“I feel like even with double the intended time, I haven't conveyed exactly what I  mean quite yet; that shortening it as much as I already have has made it too vague, so I want to use this description area as a chance to expand on some of my points. I truly don't believe much of my personal background affects my beliefs about CT. I'm from a fairly normal middle class family, born and raised in Australia for the majority of my life, Presbyterian background, but Agnostic myself... however none of this really affects my knowledge and belief when it comes to the things associated with CT, the best I can say is that I was blessed with the chance to start loving my hobby—at first, sketching and video games—though the knowledge I gained from my own research and my own dogged practice I feel affects me more than anything else in my life. Nor do I believe why I chose BCT matters, which is why I left out this question altogether. I don't have a solid reason as to why it stood out to the other subjects I had a chance for, aside from the fact that it was the closest to the things I know with certainty that I enjoy. Overall, I noticed others were going after a very essay-like structure, but looking over the rubric, especially in comparison to Stefan's rubric for the Programming first assessment, which was far more structured with specific marks set for getting specific things done in addition to 'hidden' criteria... this one didn't have that, and overall much of what we're learning from both Introduction and Studio is flexible, there isn't one right answer, it's meant to be vague, we're meant to figure things out our own way, not the expected way. Thus, I ended up going for a rather casual blog style while there's absolutely some form of structure, it's not some grade A essay, it's a heart to heart. So, well, I'm honestly taking a gamble with this, maybe I'm completely wrong but the lesson (which I'm most certainly not writing much of this within while I listen (Sorry) while the idea's still fresh) today is just confirming my beliefs. Hopefully I'm not completely wrong and fail for it but, that's neither here nor there. Our tutor (unsure if I should really be revealing the name even if it's an unlisted video, so gonna keep using vague terms instead of names :D) claimed to avoid the 'textbook' definition of Creative Tech, which, while I understand they were saying that to avoid falling under that trap of following a structure or formula, I still genuinely believe that it's the wrong message to have given us, as if that were true, that definition shouldn't exist. While yes, CT most certainly isn't anywhere close to being the exact same as learning the several degrees that CT relates to—there's no way I'm going to learn literal rocket science or how to make a panacea in CT—there's too many parallels between the subjects mentioned to be what CT is made up of, and all of these mentioned parallels, not just the example I made about each requiring practice to properly execute, nor vaguely touched upon that they're intended to do the same thing in different mediums, this is what I think Creative Technology is. In one of the previous lessons in the earlier weeks, the tutor mentioned that differentiating these subjects on "how creative they are" is absolutely absurd; that creative arts are formulaic too, that sciences are far more abstract and creative than we give them credit for. The proof in it all being all the tools and technology that each field has, if Science wasn't creative, we wouldn't have such extraordinary tools at our disposal for it. If creative arts didn't follow a system of some sort, it'd be far too abstract for us to understand, if there weren't 'systems' and 'formulas' movements aimed towards that absurdity such as Dadaism wouldn't exist (as much as I personally dislike abstracts like Dadaism and Modernism). CT is as I said, a culmination of the arts and sciences it's from, our end goals are the fruits of labour much like any of the other fields. The way Sciences such as Chemistry and Biology find use in what's deemed too useless or too dangerous—atomic energy from warfare to powering cities, Mendel's work with genes. In fact, Mendel's work is a PRIME example of all this, nobody cared AT ALL about his work until long after he died back in the 19th century, yet what he learnt is the very foundation of much of what we know about genetic biology. What was once deemed useless and irrelevant was expanded upon and realised into a full fledged idea all of its own, and I believe things like this is exactly what Creative Technologies is about...” Further examples include the internet itself, intended as a communication system for warfare, now it’s... this weird wonderful place that has opened up communication worldwide. Other examples far simpler, like literally cheese, vaccines as a concept (inoculating someone with an inert version of the virus), and all sorts of ‘alternative solutions’ that I simply can’t list off. Overall, I believe that for Creative Technologies, the end result isn’t the end. Things that failed, things that look like they have no use, all of this IS useful, all of it IS a success, just as much of a success as a positive result for other subjects is. Creative Technologists simply look at these failures and success and think to themselves “Okay so what can I rip out of this, what can I salvage for the next step?” there’s no end goal, just checkpoints which we can expand beyond, thus CT really is many of just as much the fields that it’s built from as it’s its own unique thing. In some way shape or form, the goal of CT—that there isn’t one—is the very same goal of the other fields. We went from getting a man on the moon to going to Mars to exploring the expanding universe around us, and who knows what the next step could be from there? If that isn’t creative, if that isn’t extraordinary, abstract and almost insane to hear, then nothing possibly could be. Creative Technologies in my opinion is the very ability to turn the abstract, the insane, the ridiculous into something very much so grounded in reality, and honestly I feel like I could rant about this for far longer than even the 6 minutes I allocated to my video.

[tamikharris-blog]

Keto Trim 800 Reviews 2020 Effective Weight Loss Tips

My opinion about Keto Trim 800

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Product Description

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•             it's miles the fine to weight loss supplement with the herbal fruit extracts, therefore, it burns fats from the body certainly

•             It enhances the frame potential to bear the huge amount of the food due to the fact all the food will never stay within the belly and this Keto Trim 800 will burn it appropriately from the body

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•             it's far simply ideal to get a movie star persona without any cutting or operating the frame internally

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How does it paintings?

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Whilst to anticipate effects from this Keto Trim 800

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Medical doctor’s recommendations

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Research and surveys

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Some excellent recommendations to get higher consequences

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•             normal exercise

•             drinking clean fruit juices daily

•             keep away from addicted substances

•             Take proper sleep

•             Drink an correct amount of water

•             Do normal take a look at-up

•             accept the vegetable performance

•             keep away from overeating right now

Prison disclaimers

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Chance-free

Sure, it is chance-loose weight losing complement as you've got recognize that it is the herbal fruit which has now not any extra chemical in its components and it's miles loose from any chemical substance in it thus many labs and many portions of research approves its paintings to be proper and to be perfect for the narrow body so i'm gladly telling you that it has all the satisfactory results for the human frame. It is free from any side impact and it is an only natural cloth that works simply ideal within the frame. This Keto Trim 800 is likewise supplying you with the facility of danger-free trial because a few people require some trial to get understand correctly about the product after which after the use of its risk-free path they can get surety about its exceptional paintings of their frame and that they also can get recognize that it has no longer any chance on their health so danger-free trial possibility additionally beautify the well worth of this Keto Trim 800 product.

Guidelines and commands

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A way to use it?

Yes, it is very smooth to use it because it's miles a completely easy and simple weight reduction supplement with having all of the herbal extracts in it and it has not any local fake element so it’s the usage of pattern is also very smooth or easy. Consume its first dose after the breakfast and eat its 2d dose after the diner because it will paintings magically for your frame from day to night and from night to day, on this way, there isn't always a danger to retain any fat within the body.

Problems in this product

As I stated above that Keto Trim 800 is the particular weight loss complement with having the herbal spherical form and its HCA is very active to burn the fats from the frame then it has no longer any side results for the inner health. It may have a few troubles for some people,

•             It has not an possibility to available inside the wholesale marketplace as it has been made specifically so it also available for the particular people simplest

•             Immature human beings can not get any fruitful advantage from this complement

•             a few human beings trust on the long listing of the elements, therefore, they require to trust on an extended listing which isn't to be had on this Keto Trim 800

My final opinion Keto Trim 800

I am gladly sharing my all of the enjoy with you right here that how this Keto Trim 800 is paintings within the frame to burn the fats and calories consequently it's far my very last opinion that you can not get any beneficial effect in your frame with out this Keto Trim 800 and it is the just tremendous weight loss supplement that is unfastened from any chemical substance. I am now a very attractive women with having an attractive body structure and now i can face optimistically to my buddies and relative that turned into laughed on my duller body structure. I simply love this herbal weight loss complement.

https://1blog-gratuit.com/weight-loss/keto-trim-800/

[ceffythesquirrel]

Post Apocalyptic Sander's Sides AU

Hello! This is inspired off of @sidespart amazing art of Logan and Robot!Roman. Check notes for navigation (Poor princey.) I'm sure @sidespart had a completely different idea when they were creating that art piece, so this is just my take. If they ever do anything more with that universe, just know that this is completely separate and...yeah. XD

Warnings: Lots of death mention (nothing graphic), minor character death, explosions, terrorist attacks, let me know if theres anything else!

Roman - Backstory

M29-Ro-man was created a couple years before the apocalypse by a robotics genius. The dude just took a bunch of parts from the scrap yard, cleaned them up, put him together, and programmed him to be Roman.

He was just sitting in his garage lifeless for the longest time because he was one of the few robots with emotions that existed and the creator didn't really want him stolen or known about yet. Also he was solar powered and any contact with the sun would bring him to life.

Decided to give him as a gift to a friend/Broadway star who needed a personal companion to rehearse lines with on a daily basis. Thus the robotics genius programmed Roman with everything a robot should probably not be programmed with. He had emotions, the ability to learn and gather information, and the ability to adapt through different situations and circumstances.

When the Broadway star received Roman he acted like a human with a metallic body and an off switch. He couldnt physically feel since he had no skin. The creator also mentioned to the Broadway star that he was a little too boisterous and wasnt sure how to fix it, but once meeting Roman, he didnt mind at all.

Roman instantly took to the theatre atmosphere. He was told what to do, how to help his human companion, and practice with him.

When Roman was not on duty, he was constantly watching Broadway show after Broadway show, acting them out on his own. He would always study the one his human was performing in to the T so he could help him get his lines accurate.

So they were both pretty good friends. Roman had never experienced that robots under humans rascism until way later. He experienced it when he got fitted for a prince outfit, because the Broadway star thought he'd like it, (which Roman very much did.)

Roman can also sword fight he found out. Not because he taught himself, but part of a fencing bot's mainframe was welded inside of him.

Roman believes all other robots are stupid after seeing none that act like him. He knew he was special and had a tendency to act like it.

It all changed when the first terrorist attack of WWIII happened. Of course it happened at Broadway. There was a bombing causing most of the building to collapse.

Lots of people died including his human Broadway star friend. But, Roman would never know what had happened to him. When the bomb exploded, the roof of the room he was in collapsed and debris switched Roman off rendering him useless for a couple of hours.

This is where he meets Logan.

Logan - Backstory

He was an average kid with an average family. He had no siblings and was often left to his own devices. Its not that he didn't try to make friends, its just he wasn't that good with social cues. Some say he may have been autistic, but no one knows for certain.

He has always loved robots growing up, and wanted to be someone who worked with robots. Unfortunately, the robot industry was already deep into the golden age and it was a very competitive field.

Giving up on that dream, he went with chemical engineering instead. He still had a heart for robots though, and would always watch them work whenever he could.

He was under the belief that robots should stay machines and not advance into anything else. So when he saw the world's first emotion robot he voted and protested against it with every fibre of his being.

He read the book "I am, Robot" (book about Robots taking over the world) so it makes sense why he didn't like the idea.

He graduated as valedictorian of his class and went on to become a theoretical chemist. Not what he had planned to do, but it was interesting nevertheless.

He was in a research group of 11 other scientists who were working to develop the world's first force field. It was when they succeeded that it all went to hell.

They were presenting their work at the world fair in New York when the bombing on broadway happened. It was utter chaos as other attacks ripped through the city and people ran for their lives.

Logan acted on impulse rushing people to safety while staying a safe distance with his colleagues, until an explosion split them apart.

Because one of the scientists had a feeling this was going to happen she made the other 11 make a plan b so their work wouldn't be stolen. Of the twelve, six split up the force field plans.

Logan was one of those six and was running with the three hard drives that contained all the equations for it. In his lab coat mind you, that he forgot would make him a target. So he was running from chopper fire and was able to hide behind a building and dive under rubble.

He had no idea where anyone was or if anyone was still alive since it seemed WI-Fi and internet was down all across the world. Even television was having problems.

He was shaking with fear as chaos continued to reign outside so he went further deep into the rubble to seek some sort of shelter if he could and wait out the storm.

He took a wrong step and fell a story into the exact room Roman was in.

He saw the unique looking robot, covered in debris and was more scared of it than anything. Maybe it was another trap or a bomb, but after it didnt move for awhile Logan's curiousity got the better of him and moved it out from under the pile and get a better look at it.

It was dressed like a prince, and had a sword. Some robot.

When Logan switched it on his life changed.

Hardship to Friendship

Basically the exchange went like this: Roman sprung to action with his sword. Logan shrieked and fell over from surprise. He was already scared of what was going on outside and this did not help. Roman called out Logan on his nerdy appearance and his so-called want to steal an amazing robot like him. "Over my dead body Isaac Snoopin'!" And Logan is just too terrified for any of this so he just faints.

Roman is more confused than anything, but the impact of a bomb over head tells him something is definitely wrong. His eyes widen as he remembers his human friend and is about to go find him, when the conscious he had developed told him he shouldn't leave the scientist behind no matter how much he wanted to. Especially if he was an enemy, and in sword fighting you never take your eyes off your enemy.

So he picked up Logan like a rag doll and began searching through the ruined structure for the stage.

It was a tragic scene when he got there however. No one was alive and he couldn't tell anyone apart it was that bad. Another bomb could be heard hitting the ground nearby. Roman had never felt this amount of sorrow before so he just kind of sat on the ground rocking with his knees to his chest with sadness not exactly sure how to process the emotion, since he couldn't cry.

Logan came around about an hour later and Roman was still repeatedly doing the same movements. When the prince-robot saw Logan begin to wake up he drew his sword at him.

"YOU DID THIS!" "Wh-what?! Me!?"

"Who else could have accomplished this feat but a scientist?! You murderer!" Logan began trying to explain that he's just one person and could never pull off something this massive.

As they argued, the ceiling of the room they were in began to collapse and they dove for cover in the nick of time.

Just cue the whole scene where they are running together for their lives through the crumbling hallways somewhat screaming, somewhat Roman yelling at Logan, and somewhat Logan getting frustrated at this almost human who is blaming him for the ruining of his theatre and death of his beloved friend. Logan was in the same predicament since he didnt know if anyone he knew was alive.

Logan does take it too far when he says "This is why your kind should never have emotions!"

Roman had a temper so he wasn't thinking when he took his sword and swiped it across Logan's face. Cue Roman realizing he is capable of hurting others and shrinking back. This is not the robot he wanted to be.

"I'm sorry. That was uncalled for." Logan was more suprised that the sword had only nicked him in the cheek and not got him in the throat or anything.

The place they are in begins to collapse right after that too and Logan shoves Roman out of the way with a "You're forgiven!" when the floor begins to crumble underneath them.

The rest of it is just them talking/ introducing themselves with just a little more civility and trying to find a way out of the building. They finally do, but it caves in. Roman helps push with Logan and finds out he is soooooo much stronger than a regular human. He clears the way so easily that Logan's actually jealous of the robot.

So now they are running through the city above ground away from the commotion and start their journey as fugitives in an apocalyptic world. Logan doesn't know why Roman is sticking with him and frankly Roman doesn't either, but the robot has no other place to go. Also Logan is a scientist and Roman is still suspicious that he wants to take him apart and study him. Which isn't completely wrong but Logan is more preoccupied with running for his life right now.

They first run to Logan's apartment a couple blocks down while the chaos is still happening around them. He grabs items from his house like he's evacuating and changes from his lab coat into more casual clothes, still keeping the hard drives with him.

Logan and Roman barely escape from the place before a bomb destroys the complex behind them. Logan gets tired quickly as they run through the traffic, since he didnt really work out. So Roman just picks him and his bags up with ease and sprints off with the speed of two cheetahs combined.

That was the story of how the two unlikely friends met. Logan eventually tries to contact his other colleagues only to find out that only three of them were left, not including himself. Each of them held a piece to the force field, but the blueprints of the actual structure were lost somewhere. Roman and Logan had parted ways for a little while so Logan could go meet up with the other scientists, but found out it was a trap just to get the three hard drives he had. His other colleagues were dead when he got there.

Roman had went to find his orginal creator, but there was no sign of him anywhere. So he returned to Logan and busted him out of the trap and they went on the run again.

From there on, the duo became inseparable even if they did seem like they were at odds half the time. They were soon joined by others who found sanctity and friendship within their tribe of misfits.

Emile Picani: The Ex Vice President of the fallen United States that everyone loved more than the actual president. He had signed a secret deal with the illuminati but when New York got attacked he said "Screw it" and ran.

Virgil: A 21-year-old boy with unexplainable psychic powers the government had locked up for experimentation. He's a techie and is good at technology and hacking stuff.

Patton: An alien disguised as a human who might have accidently contributed to Virgil's psychic powers. He loves everything about Earth, except the violence and bad stuff.

Remy: A defective clone who knew he was more than just a science experiment.

Nathaniel: An ex-security officer who just wants to survive the apocalypse and the people he's with sure seem to know what they are doing.

Thomas: An old friend of Logan's with the safe house they all camp out at sometimes. He is the one with all the money and supplies they need to stock up on.

There is so much more I could do for this AU. If you want me to do Patton and Virgil's meeting or backstories let me know. I'm sorry this got so long. I just love this AU now. Again credit to the artist who made that amazing piece sidespart and hope you all enjoy!

[spideyxchelle]

here is part 2 to the angsty ffh trailer-inspired fic I wrote. enjoy and also be aware. 

The buildings in Prague are not quite high enough to web-sling, and Peter is too exhausted to run. But the screams of the festival crowd do not abate, so, he limps. Something in his knee crunches with each unsteady step he takes forward. The sharp pain comes in waves that he manages to endure, somehow. He would crawl to them, if he had to, because he was given these powers for a reason. Not to use them, he had told Tony, back before everything changed, would make him complicit. After all, Mysterio had told him, these attacks were retribution.

If people died today, it was on Peter’s conscious.

He limps faster, howling after his foot snags on a jagged piece of cobblestone.

Less than an hour ago, he had walked down some of these streets with MJ. His hand held hers and she gave him the smallest, most hopeful smile that knocked him on his ass. Two weeks in Europe with her had been too good to be true.

The city burns.  

The festival is burning.

She is here. Somewhere. She is here and in danger all because of him.

“I’ll meet you at the Festival! Go there! I’ll be there soon!”

If she is hurt, he begins to consider, and quickly banishes the thought. He can’t allow himself to even think it. Michelle is okay. He is in time. She is safe.

She has to be.

He yells out her name, but in the chaotic flurry of screaming and citizens fleeing to safety, his voice gets drowned out. He doesn’t have the energy to shout over the crowd and there is no feature on this black, useless suit that could help make his voice carry. SHIELD didn’t build this suit with the love, care and attention Tony once had.

It is a black husk, built to hide in plain sight. Stealth is not going to help him win this battle.

He feels himself shaking. “Michelle,” he bellows, struggling to push through the crowd that does not budge. “MJ!” he half sobs, fighting for another inch, another step closer to the monster.

The fire elemental hurls a meteor of molten lava at the edge of the crowd. People disperse, crying, and Peter, finally, breathes. There is no current of bodies to rage against. It is now him and the monster who has yet to notice him.

Perhaps, he concludes, a little stealth might help him, after all.

He sneaks, in the shadows, toward the monster that is howling and spitting fire at fleeing citizens. His red, melting fist is rested against the side of the Ferris Wheel. The operator has long-since run to safety. There are civilians still stuck in their cable seats. One, in particular, that he notices, helplessly dangling off the ledge.

“NED!” Peter shouts.

His friend clings to the metal side of the swinging seat, as his feet buoy in the open air. “Holy crap,” Ned squeals, “Pe—Spider-Man?”

Betty scrambles off the edge of the seat, holding her boyfriend’s arms for dear life, trying to pull him up to safety. She is not strong enough. And Peter can see Ned’s strength is fading. “Hold on!” he yells.

The structural integrity of the Ferris Wheel looks poor, at best. He misses Karin. She would have been able to assess the situation, guide his feet in the safest, most practical manner. He is blind without her.

Another voice, like a half-remembered dream, whispers in his memory:

If you’re nothing without this suit, then you shouldn’t have it.

He grits his teeth. He is Spider-Man. He is Peter Parker.

And he can do this. Peter shoots a web at the Ferris Wheel and lets himself fly. The metal ride whinnies a terrible crack. It will not hold for long. Betty falls backward in her seat when Peter is suddenly perched on the edge of the ride. “Uh, hello, miss,” he says, lowering his voice a smidge.

“A little help!” Ned bawls.

Peter curses. “Right.”

He grabs the back of Ned’s shirt and hoists him up into the seat, to momentary safety. Betty flings herself into her boyfriend’s arms as soon as he is settled. She starts kissing all over his face and he pats her knee patiently, “I’m okay, I’m fine.”

“Ned,” Peter says, forgoing his lowered voice and the illusion of not-knowing-him. He doesn’t have the time to pretend to be only Spider-Man. MJ is in trouble. She needs him. Betty can ask a million questions—hell, she can know his identity—so long as he gets to save MJ. “Where is MJ?”

Betty greys, “Peter?”

He ignores her, “Ned, please.”

Ned shakes his head, “I don’t…I don’t know. One minute she was with us and the next…wait, Peter. Peter, you were with her.”

Peter’s stomach sinks, “No, no I wasn’t.”

Ned insists, “Yes, you were. We got on the Ferris Wheel, the four of us. You two took the car after—”

“Oh no,” Peter trembles. His hands close in two, tight fists. “Mysterio.” The illusions were beginning to really get on his nerves. He doesn’t have the time to wonder if the Mysterio he had been fighting a few blocks away had been the real one or an illusion, or if the Mysterio that had shown up at the Festival, to MJ, had been real or an illusion. He doesn’t need to know. The only thing that matters is MJ.

The Ferris Wheel cries, again. It will not hold.

“Ned,” Peter grips his best friend’s upper arms, “Do you trust me?”

Ned nods, “Always.”

Peter smiles, “Good. Hold tight.” He catapults his friend out of his seat and tosses him in the air. Betty screams. And just before Ned hits the ground, Peter shoots a web and catches Ned in a pseudo-hammock made of web. He bounces twice and then rolls onto the ground, safe and unharmed.

Peter turns to Betty. She takes two small steps backward, “Oh no.”

Peter apologizes, “I’m so sorry, Betty. I don’t have the time to argue.” He projects her out the side of the cable car and her screams are like murder as she falls. She continues to scream when she lands perfectly, cradled in the makeshift hammock.

Only when Ned has her back on her feet, does she stop yelling in favor of shooting Peter the finger from the top of the Ferris Wheel.

Luckily, there are no other occupants on the ride.

Which leaves MJ.

MJ.

He shoots his web at the back of the fire monster’s head. It howls and stomps around to stare at the spider perched on the top of the Ferris Wheel. Peter yells, “Hey ugly, where is my—”

But the monster disappears. It winks out of existence. The fire that ravaged the Festival stills roars, but the cause is gone. Not dusted or dead. Just gone.

Another illusion.

And that is when Peter spots Quentin Beck parading into the middle of the square with Michelle’s upper arm clenched in his fist. She struggles against him, cursing and kicking, and Peter wants to web the stupid smirk off of his stupid face. “Spider-Man,” Mysterio yells to the top of the Ferris Wheel, “I believe you are looking for something?”

Michelle says something he cannot make out, but the corner of her mouth is pressed and furious. He doesn’t like her being used as bait as much as she does. On that, they completely agree.

Peter drops off the edge of the Ferris Wheel and before his feet his the ground, he shoots a web to glide to a safer landing. His knees still ache when his feet his the ground. His fight with Mysterio from earlier is still coursing through his tired bones. He is injured. He does not have to look beneath his suit to know he is bleeding. The where is unclear. He wants to lay down.

But when he forces himself to stand, he sees MJ and remembers his fight is not done.

“Let her go, Mysterio. Your fight is with me,” Peter wearily says.

The caped master of illusions tsks, “You look unwell, Spider-Man.”

“Well,” Peter replies, “I’ve been better. I won’t lie.” The elementals kicked his ass. He is seventeen. Too young to handle a group of supervillains without back-up. He wonders if the Avengers were still a team, this would have been the sort of thing that wasn’t below their paygrade.

Michelle notices how finished he looks, he sees her eyebrows crinkle in concern, but she does voice her worry. Instead, she quips, “You’re late for our date.”

He can’t help it, he smiles, “I got held up.”

Mysterio tosses MJ to the ground, “Enough!”

Peter sees red. It utterly consumes him. Anger. He does not consider himself a vengeful, angry person. But when Michelle hits the ground, when her hands scrape on the cobblestone and come away with blood, he knows he has a well of emotion in him untapped. His fury. He clenches his fists, “Oh no. See, we’re not going to do that.”

Mysterio cracks open his mouth to speak, but Peter does not let him.

In fact, Peter is not sure what he lets happen. His vision shifts from a violent red to black. He feels his webs fly out and he feels his muscles ache from punches and he smells the bitter iron of blood. He knows he is fighting. He knows whatever he is fighting is not an illusion, but a man of flesh and blood.

He knows that he is outmanned and outgunned, and that this war is way beyond his paygrade. He knows that men with powers like Quentin Beck once dusted half of an entire universe. He knows that he should lose. He knows that he might die.

None of that matters.

When his vision clears, when he returns to his body, it is weaker and injured and he is fading, fading, fading fast, but he is still standing. He got hit and he stood up. Again and again.

He sees Nick Fury, for some reason, who is binding Quentin Beck with some kind of spell. He sees Maria Hill, helping the wounded. He sees Ned and Betty watching him from a distance.

But he doesn’t care about anything except the girl that is running to him with bloodied palms and a striking, distressed face. She throws herself in his arms and, against all odds, he catches her.

He buries his face in her dirty, bloody hair and breathes. She scrambles for a too tight hug, she claws at his back, and he holds her just as tightly. “You’re okay,” she whispers.

“I’m so sorry,” he hiccups.

She shakes her head, clinging to him, “You’re okay. That’s all that matters.”

The sirens of foreign police officers ring in the distance. Peter startles. He will not be able to be anonymous for long. The people from the Festival all fled when the battle began. SHIELD is here now to clean up their mess, but he, Spider-Man, needs to go. He can’t be here.

Michelle seems to understand that implicitly. And yet, she does not let him go.

Instead, she rolls up the bottom half of his black mask, until it tickles his nose. “MJ,” he asks.

She shushes him. He has so many questions. He is still reeling from the fight. He wants to check her hands, the hands he had held earlier that night, to see if she is okay, but she doesn’t give him the time. She steals forward and kisses him soundly.

He is more than surprised.

And has even more questions, now.

When she pulls away, she pushes him away, playfully, “Go on. Get out of here.”

He yanks his mask down, over his mouth that still tingles from her kiss, “Wait, MJ—”

She shakes her head, “Later. Go on.” Michelle Jones smirks, “Spider-Man.”

He is weary and broken and still healing from this fight and Thanos and all of it, but this girl, this wonderful, extraordinary girl, makes him start to dream of wasted, beautiful hours where the only battle he will have to wage is not falling in love with her too fast.

[ghostmartyr]

SnK 112 Thoughts

Congrats to Eren on giving all the good people contributing to his series’ Wild Mass Guessing page a shout-out. Good on you, man. You’ve got my vote on your cult not doing anything wrong or aggravatingly stupid ever.

Also, Zeke!

It’s rare we see such a prime example of a leader in a shounen manga knowing how to delegate. Props, my man!

I hope Annie kicks both your heads off!

This is an emotional chapter.

Before we begin, I have one thing I need to get off my chest.

Thank you for your time.

First thing first!

I love how Nicolo’s entire theory is, “something shady is up with the wine and idk Zeke and spinal fluid sounds right????” This entire chapter is one long tribute to everything the fandom has ever screamed about and it is fantastic in that one aspect.

Also, hey, hope for Falco. Zeke waits until all the bottles are empty before he screams, so I would guess that he at least prefers his victims to be properly dosed. Falco should be okay. The blunt force trauma might actually be the more concerning bit for the bright and shiny little one.

Another thing I love is how every single mention of Marley somehow makes Marley come across even worse.

Sorry, that’s not fair.

I love how every single mention of Marley reminds and confirms that they are the worse, and the reminders serve to dig that knowledge deeper into all our souls until we almost don’t mind when innocent civilians are wiped off the map if it means that structure no longer exists.

“Almost” being subject to innate character and morality.

Eren does not recognize the union of “almost” and adds the asterisk of “younglings” after “innocent civilians.”

Hell though, Nicolo. At least you found yourself, even if it did come after battering a child into unconsciousness. And you kept Connie and Jean from drinking the bad juice.

I really like the interaction between Nicolo and Sasha’s dad. Nicolo’s not the man he is. He loses himself in his anger and only chance stops him from crossing a very serious line.

But Mr. Blouse is the type of man Nicolo can see the merit in, and define himself by that gap because the end of that gap is something so much better than the man who come close to murdering children.

Some people are still learning to be better, even now, because of the good people they surround themselves by.

Gabi has been surrounded by nothing but warmth (barring Nicolo and Kaya’s trauma) since arriving to Paradis. Falco is a good guy. Mikasa and Armin are good people. The family of the soldier she killed are good people.

She isn’t charging at Mikasa and Armin (and geez every time these kids get a distance shot when the other characters are standing up it fucks me up; they are too tiny for any of this). She’s been passionately defending everything she and Marley has done, but now she’s quiet, and all she can do is ask for her friend, who keeps saving her life, to not be killed. All she can do is offer up her life to make up for the crimes that she can’t imagine being forgiven.

She is so young. Killing and violence and death are the obvious conclusions to her. She’s been taught that, and she excels at that, but now she keeps finding people who are willing to stand down and not kill her.

Reiner’s character is a slow stumble into his morality breaking his mind. Slowly, the idea that these people he’s surrounded by are people encroaches.

Gabi’s thrown into the deep end and the plot keeps shoving her head down when she struggles to the surface to breathe. None of this has been kind on her. The violent assault on her sanity is the kind she’s only ever been exposed to physically.

I haven’t put much thought into what I want from the Warriors, because thoughts of anything Marley adjacent always tend to irritate me. They’re trapped in a broken cycle that they’re perpetuating, and that makes them impossible to root for.

But I think Gabi needs her cousin.

She’s always wanted to be strong for him, and he’s only clinging to life because he wants to be strong for her and Falco.

Reiner knows what it’s like to learn that your simple world is infinitely more complicated than you can bear. This is his little cousin, and she’s gone through the crash course version of his nightmare. She doesn’t need the right answer that makes it all okay (there isn’t one), but a hug and someone understanding all of the twisting moral paradoxes shattering her insides would be such a helpful thing.

Heck, it would be good for Reiner, too. Seeing all of his pain in someone he doesn’t have the heart to blame. Maybe he could find some sort of path to peace in that.

Then everything just goes straight to hell.

Despite this chapter’s... this chapter...ness, Eren stepping straight into the backroom with his hand covered in blood? Hella fucking cool. Like. That is one thing I absolutely did not see coming, and it is a great way to bring him on back in.

I thought he wouldn’t get to talk to Armin or Mikasa until his plan exploded and they needed to bail him out. I never once expected him to just walk right in and take his buddies hostage for a nice, quiet conversation.

That said, yike.

Yike, yike, and dare I say it, yikes.

Grior reveals Our Heroes’ location, and that’s... really scary in itself, because Grior tells him that he’s grown too close with Eldians, yet Grior is helping the fanatical Eldians act in accordance with Zeke’s plans.

So it isn’t that Nicolo’s gotten too close with Eldians, it’s that he’s grown close to them without the purpose of exploiting them. Which, as every Marleyan soldier knows, is a bad thing.

And Floch doesn’t mind. He’s accepting the help of Grior without any comment.

Let’s do a brief headcount: Yelena, Zeke, and Eren run a cult of fanatic Eldians under the banner of a new Eldian Empire. Paradis’ military is theoretically running Paradis but really sentenced to the whims of said cult. At least one prisoner of war sides with helping out the cult. The Anti-Marley Volunteers (or at least Onyankopon) are in the dark.

Floch is, partially, willing to let Zeke’s plans play out however they may because they can work to destabilize the current Paradis government.

It’s fitting that this chapter is called, “Ignorance.” Willful and unwillful.

And as Eren says, nothing is further from freedom.

Now let’s get to the fun happy times of EMA.

See? Eren gets out of prison and the first thing on his mind is talking to his best friends! Such a touching, emotional sentiment!

...

Yeah, do you guys know where to begin? I don’t.

This is just.

Honestly, I keep moving back to yikes?

Eren is gathering people he has no emotional attachment to to his side, and aggressively pushing his friends away. He is doing everything he can to abandon them on the roadside and make sure they will have zero desire to come crawling back to him.

The question is if he’s doing this because he believes it’s best within his own head, he believes it’s the best response to being threatened into this, or if Eren’s just gone completely haywire in the membrane and his PTSD is finally attacking people besides himself emotionally.

This kind of deliberate cruelty has like. motive.

Mikasa tries to talk to Eren by reminding him of how kind he is. The warmth is what saves her in her mind, not the violence. She’s the one to bring up the kidnapping.

Eren counters.

Nothing like kindness saves her. It’s biology. Friendship doesn’t bind them, slavery does. Happenstance brings them together and keeps them there.

Mikasa argues. She says he’s wrong, and tells him it’s because of him that she’s strong, meaning him as a person.

Eren doesn’t address that. Despite being the one to ask how he’s wrong, when he’s given an attempt at an answer, he keeps monologuing rather than respond to Mikasa’s feelings for him. He brings up her headaches.

Mikasa is dead, and a slave, and he hates her.

“Do you know who I hate most in this world? Anyone who isn’t free.”

Ignorance is furthest from freedom. Even in this script Eren has adopted, no matter how much of it is the truth, if Eren’s seeking to relieve Mikasa of her ignorance, he’s seeking to bring the slave he hates so much freedom. From him.

Funny, she might protect Eren automatically, but she doesn’t have any problem with headaches when Armin punches Eren and makes him bleed.

Armin earns a less prolonged speech before all of it, and it’s...

For both of them, this is the worst thing they could hear from Eren. Armin, as a child, always feels useless next to his strong friends. His huge moment in Trost comes from realizing they never see him that way. It’s all in his head.

This isn’t in his head. This is Eren, telling him he’s useless.

Telling him that Bertolt, who’s only in his head because Eren fought tooth and nail to put him there, is interfering with his free will.

(Also even if everything Eren is saying is the bull it feels like, can has Frieda!Eren? Memory seepage. Canonize my brotp, manga. Do it.

(Double also, lol at Eren saying that memories are part of who you are, and Armin having Bertolt’s means bad things, but Eren having... lots has no effect, he is teh free as a bird. Kiddo, you are not a good bad guy.))

Eren calls himself free before he starts talking. He’s free from his ignorance in a way they are not, and he chooses to enlighten his friends.

Good grief. And more grief. Less than good grief?

Terrible grief?

ALL the grief.

Eren’s the one who wants a peaceful talk with his friends. All so he can beat the crap out of them physically and emotionally.

Eren.

What in the fuck. What reason could you possibly have to need Armin and Mikasa that far away from you? Why do they need to be pushed out of trying to see the good in you?

I’m sure there’s a reason, because story.

But wow.

Killing younglings was one thing. Lording the high ground and your blood brother over your real family?

Your heroic sacrifice where you finally die and everyone’s crying about how you did all this stupid stuff alone but truly for a good cause had better make me cry like a damn baby kid, or you are dead to me.

Additionally, heeeey. Guess what.

Guess what Eren’s learned about important things.

And throwing them away.

Can you guess.

Can you.

It’s the family he has that isn’t pro-murder.

That’s actually of serious interest to me, because one of the things I think the story has been moving towards is an actual examination of the belief that you need to sacrifice things to change things. While Armin states that in a philosophical, hey, this seems like how we win, way, the story has, more and more, focused on the love that keeps people from making certain sacrifices.

Eren’s thrown love, the only reason Armin’s alive to punch him, away.

For as dark as this story is, that’s never been the right choice. Letting people go is understood and respected. Disloyalty is scorned and rejected.

My theory for a while has been that the true answer to these sacrifices is that if you throw away the things you care about to change the world, that world will have changed into something abominable.

The world would be a different place if Sasha didn’t care about killing children.

Sasha being Sasha is why Nicolo tries to fight Zeke’s plans.

Eren’s world without Armin and Mikasa is not going to be a better one for him, and possibly not for anyone else, either.

Then we lead into...

Things that just make me really, really uncomfortable.

I don’t mind people like Levi suggesting that someone eats Zeke, then dies in a few months when Historia eats that person. I. That’s fine. That’s a fine plan, and it makes sense for where they’re at, and anyone who agreed to that would agree, no issue.

Historia’s plotline continues to make me... uncomfortable is really the word. Not the tragic, devastating uncomfortable that Eren’s stuff is. Just... the sickening kind. The fact that people have, off-screen, come to terms with perpetuating the same kind of bloody sacrifice of their children that plagues their entire society after we had an entire arc ending with Historia going hey, actually fuck that...

A thirteen-year-old being bred to eat its mother is a disgusting concept.

I know I’ve said it before, and I realize people are probably done with my feelings on the subject, but if that is really the story being told--even if it avoids that conclusion, the fact that a scheme like that is allowed to get so far without any comment to the contrary except by the Kylo Ren wannabe at the very start--

Why in the fuck should I care what happens to these people?

You raise a child to die for you, you don’t deserve to live.

What happens if they don’t consent in thirteen years? What if they don’t want to eat their mommy? Oh well, we’re going to force you, just like every other Eldian society from the dawn of time? Or guilt you into it because thousands of lives depend on you having none?

Fuck all of you. If that’s your plan, I don’t mind Zeke killing each and every last one of you. I will naturally prefer if he dies in the process, but it’s not the prerequisite you might think.

(Repeated statement that at this point, I will be doing my fandom activities until the series ends, but yeah. This is the place where I choose to opt out, emotionally, if it’s really going down like this.)

Um. In news that actually matters to people who aren’t me, heeeeey, Levi alone in the forest with 31 titans.

This is why the SnK kinkmeme was created.

It’s also really sad.

They killed the titans inside their home.

Zeke’s bringing them back.

Annie needs to kick so many people in the head I can’t even.

[tsainami]

wip prep tag

tagged by: @hazeywrites and @omgbrekkerkaz​ ! tysm 💫

rules: answer the questions and then tag as many writers as there are questions answered (or as many as you can) to spread the positivity! even if these questions are not explicitly brought up in the novel, they are still good to keep in mind when writing.

i’ll be doing this for my wip CHEAT.

FIRST LOOK

1. describe your novel in 1-2 sentences (elevator pitch).

a random guy pops out of nowhere and starts a drug that gives people the ability to use magic. magic doesn’t exist in this world so this is very shady and a lot of people go and chase him.

2. How long do you plan for your novel to be? (Is it a novella, single book, book series, etc.)

at first i thought i’d write a standalone but realised the plot was too big. i think it’ll be a duology.

3. What is your novel’s aesthetic?

over the top gothic + renaissance + baroque architecture everywhere (the main setting is based off of prague), errr magic (duh, dasy), lots of shadowy corners. um half dead doves? necromancy.

4. What other stories inspire your novel?

well there’s two. one’s true and happened to me (it birthed this wip really). long story short i was out on a trip with my family and one summer night while we were walking, something happened that made my dad turn to me and say “you know, the people of this world have a tendency to cheat.” 

the second is from a video game called dishonored. it’s one of my favourite games and you can definitely see a lot of similar elements between cheat and dishonored’s world (like, say, the VOID to name a big one). 

5. Share 3+ images that give a feel for your novel.

i wish i could share an edit, but i haven’t made any for cheat as a whole but here’s its pinterest board.

MAIN CHARACTER

6. Who is your protagonist?

my main protagonist is a boy called jan (yahn). he’s the one running around dealing magic.

7. Who is their closest ally?

in the beginning, the con-artists he’d given magic to (long-standing customers of his lol). but none of them really trust him so i don’t think they really count. that changes later on though. there’s also another person--a middle aged, disabled lady--called britta who probably understands him the most but we see quite little of her.

8. Who is their enemy?

well, there’s this undead queen from another dimension who is hellbent on revenge and a whole other dimension also has sent hunters after him. [i guess a man-made god and semi-goddess?]

9. What do they want more than anything?

jan’s kinda... complicated. he has two personalities. one of them--the one that prevails the most at least during most of the story as a whole and can be called the OG jan--wants the system assigned to the universe (in this story, it just means the mentioned number of dimensions) to change. he wants to right the wrongs he’s made. and if he’s a little honest, he wants his life and real name before he became... what he currently is... back (but he knows this is impossible).

his second personality doesn’t want any of that. he disagrees with the system as well, but it doesn’t involve him and he thinks humans should do what they want to do even with the greater knowledge (made possible thanks to... spoilers) that it’ll just fuck them and world up. all he really wants is a very slow, lowkey manipulative revenge.

fyi: when i talk about jan, unless i specify his second personality i’m always talking about the OG jan.

10. Why can’t they have it?

sksks i made a longwinded reply to that previous question, so for here i’ll just say for jan #1 it’s because--apart from everyone being NOPE LOL--a sacrifice the size of jupiter will have to be made. for jan #2 it’s cause jan #1 exists and is thwarting all his plans.

11. What do they wrongly believe about themselves?

that he’s unforgivable. that his existence is meaningless. that as soon as he fulfils his purpose the world would be better without him.

12. Draw your protagonist! (Or share a description)

jan has black hair somewhere between straight and wavy. shorter at the back, longer in front with a length that goes past his ears. he dresses like some dude from the 20′s (sometimes he wears coats he looks like he’s drowning in though). he’s got light, yellow-toned olive skin and a mole on his neck and another one on his ear. he has two piercings in one hear and has an earring that dangles from one of them. he has hooded eyes and normal eyebrows (what are normal eyebrows), good bone structure and he's neither underweight nor overweight. he’s somewhere between 5′11 and 6 foot. he's poc. 

PLOT POINTS

13. What is the internal conflict?

spoiler memories from a spoiler time haunt him. basically he was victimised by a group of murdering naysayers. this goes hand in hand with his struggle over which personality dominates his being.

14. What is the external conflict?

magicking people out for blood and their magicking monster familiars.

15. What is the worst thing that could happen to your protagonist?  

that he gives over to his second personality and ‘dies’ (because of his circumstance death means to live through that though, watching it all). he’d rather be killed instead.

16. What secret will be revealed that changes the course of the story?

mad spoilers but it’s that you can do whatever you want with jan if you find his heart (he doesn’t have it atm and tbh nobody knows where it is). as for which side finds it first... hmmm i wonder.

17. Do you know how it ends?

yes and so far everyone who i’ve shared the ending with has hated me.

BITS AND BOBS

18. What is the theme?  

i think one of the biggest themes in cheat is in regards to time. we all have a limited amount of time on this world and it’s ultimately always up to us to decide on what we do with it. however, every thing we do always relates to something and even something so small as a thought could shape what kind of life we’ll live. no one is entirely good or bad and every one is imperfect. but jbc life can sound stressful and BIG and scary doesn’t mean we can’t face it. we all have our merits and we all have the ability to develop from the mistakes we’ve made.

19. What is a recurring symbol?  

the moon.

20. Where is the story set? (Share a description!)

a city called heidelheim. it’s made out of cobblestones and spires and huge gothic vampire buildings next to shabby small squashed houses. then there’s random marble domes with painted ceilings, bridges, an obelisk... there’s something called the outskirts too that has some hills and trees.

21. Do you have any images or scenes in your mind already?

i’ve got some.

22. What excited you about this story?  

the ending hahahahaha.

23. Tell us about your usual writing method!  

oof. my method (and the reason why this isn’t already a whole ass novel considering it’s been 2 years) is freak out! write a sentence. think about useless things (why would a pigeon be at the city square at night? that doesn't make sense? is it a normal pigeon? what is the purpose of its life?). try not to get distracted (i always do though) and write another sentence.

this story will probs be finished when i’m 89 years old. i’ve got some years to go.

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