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pomplalamoose · 7 months

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DILF Luke headcanons / story draft

🌱modern day AU🌱

A/N: It's outrageous how there is so much content for modern day dilf Anakin but basically none for dilf Luke and I'm here to fix it😤

I hope you enjoy this little collection of headcanons, ideas and scenarios <3

part 2, part 3, part 4, part 5

• think about dilf!Luke who is in his late 30s to early 40s

• he lives in a nice house together with his adult child

• before you meet for the very first time you don't know anything about him at all

• nor about his former partner for that matter

• assuming you are friends with Luke's child, you may get enough information to know that his wife/their mother is no longer in the picture

• are their parents still married but they're simply not living together anymore?

• did she leave him?

• did they have to get a divorce?

• did something happen to her?

• you don't want to pry and, of course, you are sure your friend will open up once they feel like talking about it

• there are so many other things to share and discuss anyways, so why, of all things, would you talk about their father's love life?

• (soon though you'll find you want to talk about nothing else)

• on the rare occasions your respective families do come up in conversation, it's always clear they have a really great relationship with their dad

• Luke cares for his kid a lot and wants to be involved in what they do to support them, no matter how old they are

• so naturally he doesn't mind them inviting their friends over, which is how you'd get to know him in the first place

• that's just the thing though, I think he has some kind of reputation among the people who have already met him

• there is lots of talk surrounding his person, as well as many circulating rumors

• while his immediate family always describes him as very loving, he doesn't seem to show this side of him to others very often, if at all

• nobody has ever witnessed him smile, meanwhile his family say he's very fun to be around

• he's a walking mystery

• while he is evermore polite and hospitable he keeps a careful distance between himself and anyone who may try to engage in conversation

• even when someone stays over at the Skywalker's house for a longer period of time, maybe for dinner, they don't see him again until they bid their goodbye

• he's just rather intimidating with how stern and standoffish he tends to come across

• nobody knows what he does for work but he and his family seem to be well off

• so when your friend invites you to their house for the first time you can't help but be excited

• at the same time you are pretty nervous, wishing to make a good impression

• what is going on with this man that everybody keeps talking and speculating about?

• as soon as he opens the door and you meet his eyes, you know why

• he's handsome, almost intimidatingly so

• he carries himself swiftly, his movements elegant

• he towers above you and your heart picks up speed when he shakes your much smaller hand

• he offers to help you out of your jacket, then gives you a nod and leaves you waiting for your friend as you pick up your jaw from the floor

• at work he wears dark suits and gleaming, black shoes

• though he's always nicely dressed, even at home

• he's often seen wearing soft plaid or monochrome shirts

• during the warmer days or when he's busy in the kitchen he rolls up the sleeves and leaves open a few buttons at the top

• on rare occasions he wears his shirt open or forgoes it completely during especially hot summer days

• only his family and later you will see him like this though

• during autumn or winter he adds cardigans or knitted sweaters and pairs them with neat jeans, alternatively with corduroy or cloth pants

• from time to time he puts on glasses

• of course he owns sweatpants and simple t-shirts as well, however they only make an appearance at night

• or when he's going for a jog around the neighborhood

• he does so quite often

• as expected it takes him a long while to warm up to you

• in fact you thought he never would as nobody else in your friend group managed to pull off this feat

• but depending on how you befriended his kid and how close the both of you are growing over time, it's only natural you like to share lots of your free time together

• you may have met at college or university and study together regularly

• or maybe you work at the same job and like to spend your evenings sharing stories and talking about your day

• so why would you meet at your place when their home is so conveniently close and quicker to reach?

• ultimately Luke can't avoid you, and what your presence awakens in him, forever

• eventually he stops disappearing as quickly as he used to after greeting you and instead stays around a few minutes for polite small talk

• when in the beginning it was stilted and somewhat uncomfortable, after a while it starts to feel like he's somewhat interested in what you have to say about the weather or your day, depending on what he asks you about

• so whenever you come over now you are nervous for a very different reason than you used to be

• does he like the way you dress?

• and your perfume?

• and how you did your hair?

• what's his type anyways, would he ever consider you pretty?

• never does he show his attraction to you in any way though, so you are left guessing

• he never answers your questions either, may it be those you ask aloud and those you keep a secret

• if he does respond to them then only in really cryptic ways that make no sense at all

• you have a hard time telling whether he's messing with you or not

• you do realize however that he appears to have grown somewhat fond of you

• your conversations not only grow more natural but also longer

• he seems to enjoy spending this short amount of time with you that it takes your friend to come downstairs or to get ready before they whisk you away with them

• maybe over the holidays you spend more and more time with your friend and thus at their home

• (if you get to see their father, that's just a nice added bonus)

• and at some point Luke starts to check in on the both of you while you're visiting

• unbeknownst to you he has never done so before

• he'll ask what you're doing and if he can help?

• what are you working on?

• do you need anything?

• something to drink? A snack?

• he'll bring you tea and some cookies either way

• also, how long are you staying?

• what would you like to eat?

• he often cooks in the evening and you're welcome to join him and his kid at dinner

• shortly after he starts sending his greetings through your friend

• you learn that apparently he asks about you occasionally, especially when you haven't been to their house for a longer period of time

• he mostly wants to know how you're doing

• how are your studies or work projects coming along?

• if you need help, he'd definitely take a look, he's well read after all

• he wants to support the business you work for

• would you mind if he came by some time?

• when will you visit again?

• your friend tells you jokingly that he thinks you're being a good influence on them

• you receive a warm welcome once you are able to accept one of your friends invitations again

• or at least warm in comparison to how it used to be before

• after all he's still an imposing figure, even though you've grown somewhat accustomed to his all consuming presence

• it's obvious now, even to you, that he's suddenly lingering in your vicinity, coming up with reasons to stay for longer than before

• for longer than necessary

• and slowly you see the person come to light your friend told you about all this time ago

• it's fleeting and still subdued but you manage to catch little glimpses of it here and there

• he absolutely makes dad jokes and silently smiles to himself when your friend dramatically rolls their eyes at them

• he likes to celebrate special occasions by taking your friend and you out for ice cream or a milk shake

• no, you aren't too old for that, let him buy you something nice!

• you may call him by his first name now

• (after all this time it's weird to suddenly say Luke and often a Sir slips out despite his offer)

• one evening he teaches the two of you how to waltz around the kitchen

• he starts allowing you to see him in more vulnerable moments as well

• so when you let yourself in through the back door now, you may find him taking a nap in the living room

• he looks untroubled and so much younger when he's asleep

• there is a pool in the backyard and during summer you're able to sneak a look at his athletic body while he's sunbathing or swimming his laps

• unfortunately (or luckily?) he tends to wear really tight swim shorts that leave little to nothing to the imagination

• once he caught you staring and winked at you, asking whether you liked his outfit

• (your friend yelled at him for that)

• you weren't able to look him in the eyes for a while after and have yet to recover

• there comes a day during winter when you forget the time and suddenly it's late and very dark outside

• to make it worse it's heavily raining

• you're already turning to leave saying goodbye to your friend

• they ask you to be careful and to call them when you've made it home safely

• you give your promise but before you can even start down the front steps you are stopped

• Luke is not having it

• either you'll stay over night or he'll drive you home, he won't make compromises

• flustered you ask him to drive you home and he does after properly chastising your friend for not coming straight to him

• you sit in the back because you're too shy to use the passenger seat but he doesn't say anything about it

• to your embarrassment he opened the car door for you and offered his hand to help you get in, all the while shielding you from the rain

• you took it

• you're scared that, for some reason, he's angry at you

• you watch him closely but he remains impassive, his expression unreadable

• it's quiet for the whole car ride and in your mind you're practicing how to say thank you when he'll eventually drop you off

• the sight of him, even from diagonally behind, is mesmerizing

• the passing cars and street lights illuminate him beautifully and when he has to look to the side before making a turn they highlight his sharp jawline

• he insists on taking you to your front door and only leaves when you're safely inside

• after that he'll regularly ask whether you wish to sleep over or want to be driven home

• he keeps to himself how often he thinks and worries about you, though it shows through his actions

• he sits you down and makes sure you have his number saved in your phone

• he tells you to text or call him whenever

• don't be afraid to ask to be picked up, he'll come immediately when you need him to

• from now on though, you will always be sitting beside him in the front, it's not a question

• he likes to listen to your stuttering breath when he rests his hand on your thigh

• he regularly asks about your well-being

• "Have you eaten yet?"

• one day he slips up and, while deep in thought, accidentally calls you sweetheart

• unbeknownst to you that's what he has been calling you in his mind for weeks as he's slowly growing more and more possessive

#luke skywalker #luke skywalker x reader #luke skywalker x you #dilf luke #dilf luke skywalker #dilf luke friday #luke star wars #star wars #star wars fanfiction #star wars headcanons #star wars a new hope #star wars empire strikes back #star wars return of the jedi #luke headcanons #headcanons

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pablitogavii · 1 year

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I love you too

Summary: One where the reader is scared of the three letter word because of the way she's been raised :)

Pairing: Pablo Gavi x Reader

Warnings: mentions of smut but nothing graphic/ slight angst/ fluffy ending <3

She has been dating Pablo for some time now and they went though hell and back since the world found out about their relationship.

The survived all the gossip, judgment, obsessive fanatics and still maintained a stable and healthy relationship. They have never loved each other more, and for the first time in awhile they were both happy.

Pablo had just came back from Madrid after a game, when they made love to each other for hours next to a fire place showing to each other just how much they missed being together.

"That was amazing Gavinho.." she smiled laying on his strong chest still catching her breath while staring at the raging fire next to them.

"I love you Y/N.." he said and she felt her face getting serious as she comprehended the meaning of his words. She stayed quiet.

Nobody ever told her those three words before...in her house it wasn't common to hear people "loving" each other..it was more like they "respected" one another..so she didn't even know what those words really meant.

"Um.." he said nervously when she wasn't replying and she got up from his chest holding sheets close to her naked chest finding the best possible excuse to go home.

"I should finish that project.." she said obviously lying but he felt so embarrassed for saying like that so suddenly to her so he nodded helping her collect her clothes watching her get dressed.

Why didn't she say it back? Did she not feel the same?

When she got up, he walked her to the door pulling her waist back and leaving another kiss on her swollen lips which she gladly accepted giving him a weak smile.

"We are good..I'll see you tomorrow" she said leaving quickly while Gavi went back to bed staring up at the celling wondering what had just happened..was he pushing you hard so soon?

The next day, Pablo arrived to the training center way early not really getting any decent sleep last night and it really did show as all his teammates commented how dreadful he looked.

"Might consider getting your sleep schedule checked, kid!" Xavi even said and Pablo apologized for slacking off during training getting caught by Pedri who pulled him to the side.

"Is everything okay hermano? Is it Y/N?" he said and Pablo nodded knowing he can trust his best friend with this.

"I said "I love you" to her last night...but she didn't say it back" Pablo explained to Pedri feeling his heart breaking as he remembered wishing he knew why you didn't love him back...he wanted you to love him back so badly.

"You know how her parents are hermano, they are colder than winter..maybe she just got scared you know? But there in no doubt she feels the same as you..just give her some time to realize it" Pedri assured and Pablo nodded hoping that he didn't scare you away forever.

She couldn't sleep either neither could she function the next day at school...she kept thinking about last night and those three words Pablo used.

"I love you Y/N..." kept replaying in her head when her best friend interrupted her thoughts brining her back to reality.

"Alright, what happened?"

"Nothing..I..."

"Wanna try again? Something clearly upset you"

"He said he loves me...last night, after we made love..but I don't know what that means..so I didn't say anything...and I think I lost him forever now"

"Oh, don't be absurd. Pablo wouldn't give up on you so easily! Boy is obsessed with you..it's kinda adorable actually"

"I'm obsessed with him too...I think I might feel the same...what do I do now?"

"Wait for him at his place and tell him! You still have the key, right?"

"Yeah.." and with the last school bell she departed to Pablo's apartment to wait for him to return from his trainings.

Pablo stayed long after the training to hand out with the guys, truthfully because he couldn't get himself to lay in the bed he slept with her so many times before..it made him think about last night and he didn't want that.

"Alright, let's head home chicos!" Ansu said when it was almost midnight and everyone agreed so Pablo didn't have another choice than to go home..to his cold bed..without her next to him.

While Pedri was giving him a ride, he kept checking his phone for a text or a call but nothing came. He knew when her school ended but she didn't reach out to him the whole day...maybe she will never reach out again.

"She will call again...just time hermano" Pedri said like he was reading Pablo's mind making him smile weakly before exiting the car and getting into his apartment building.

He unlocked his door walking inside and tossing the keys to the jar before taking off his jacket little startled when he saw her sleeping on his couch.

His heart started beating fast that he saw her again as he came closer and touched her cheek softly(gif)...she was so beutiful.

"P..Pablo?" she opened her eyes unaware that she fell asleep looking up at him sleepily. He smiled nodding his head and squatting down to grab her bridal style and carry her to bedroom.

When he put her underneath the covers and walked to the closet to get changed, she started fidgeting with her fingers nervously..she wanted to say it back to him..she was ready..but she was scared...what if he changed his mind after last night?

"I love you too!" she just blurred out making him come out of the walk in closet shirtless and in his boxers with raised eyebrows.

"Um..I.." she got up from the bed walking towards him snaking her arms around his shoulders "love..." she went on her tip toes " you.." she pecked his lips "too" and the moment all that left her lips he grabbed her body making her snake her legs around his torso as he kissed her passionately.

He tossed her onto the bed hovering above her with a bright smile on his face while looking down at her glowing eyes.

"I'm sorry I didn't say it last night..I didn't know.." she tried to explain herself but he stopped it with another kiss training kisses down her neck.

"I know amor....you haven't heard someone say it before..you got scared but I promise to show you what love feels like..if you'd let me?" Pablo said and you smiled nodding your head with tears falling down your face but he kissed them away capturing your lips again.

I hope you enjoyed! <33

#pablo gavi icons #pablo gavi x you #pablo gavi x reader #pablo gavi x y/n #pablo gavi #gavi #gavigif #pablo martín páez gavira #pablo gavira #fc barça #fc barcelona #fc barca

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abduloki · 2 years

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She Hulk (Ep 8)

You can do something to change your life and help others or you can continue going down the same path hoping things will change somehow.

In other words, complaining gets you nowhere but changing does.

Matt Murdock’s been through shit, he got blinded as a kid when he tried to do the right thing to save others from accident, he got lost when his father the only person he knows him and loves him died, he found a teacher, Stick, who guide and “whipped” his butt into shape, developing his mental strength and senses, then gets betrayed by him, he fell in love with Elektra and he gets betrayed by her too, then he lost her, he fought alongside the Defenders, with Luke Cage, Jessica Jones and Iron Fist, and he almost died.

He earns the respect of the Punisher who sees beneath the cold and ruthless image of Daredevil lies the man of principle, Matt Murdock.

He earns the respect of the Kingpin who sees him as a worthy opponent that cannot be bought with money like all the men he knows.

He earns the respect of the police officer, Brett Mahoney, who finally sees him as an extension of the law when it comes to someone like Kingpin.

The list goes on that I had to rewatch all three seasons to remember what else he’s been through that I do not remember as I write this.

Despite all the things he went through, he remained a good man, running a small law firm, helping others without caring about money but wanting to do good, which is why his friends Karen and Foggy, stood by his side although there were times when they were driven apart by conflict and life happenings.

He hardly smile but in this episode of She Hulk he smiles, a lot. At first I thought that it’s so unlike him but I realised a lot of other things must have happened in between season 3 of Daredevil and this episode of She Hulk that we do not know of. Seems to me that he’s finally made peace with his inner demons.

He’s changed. He’s able to let go of the past. Which is why he’s telling She Hulk to change as well. When life happens, it’s telling you something, it’s telling you to change, change your frame of mind, change your thinking, change the way you see things, if you remain as you are, nothing will ever change.

"First thing you need to understand is nobody feels sorry for you and nobody ever will. What it's gonna be Matt? You gonna spend your life crying yourself to sleep at night? Or you gonna dig deeper and find out what it takes to reshuffle those cards life dealt you? It's your call."

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riseofamoonycake · 1 year

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We Are Happy Together

🌟 Pairing: Indra x Star goddess!reader x Varuna

🌟 Warnings: none

🌟To @evansuvamp, @praisethesuuun and @seijuuns-fantasy, and to all the Hindu pantheon’s lovers!

🌟

They always tell you that you don’t know how to behave like a goddess: that your clothes are never tidy, the curls look like a bush of brambles from how indomitable they are, your voice is too high-pitched and your laughter uncontrolled. Always.

«What god will ever look at you if you don’t take care of your appearance? Keep your head up! Straight back! … And wipe that mud spot on your cheek, are you an animal? The Lady of the Stars cannot appear in this state, (Y/N)! Shame on you!»

You listen with a smile, nod politely and say thanks, and then you do as you see fit. Of course, you wish you weren’t so careless and risk tearing your wonderful gowns at every slightest movement, but in truth you don’t care much about looking elegant, refined and composed. The deities are not all the same, and there are goddesses who are very far from the image that your pantheon is constantly proposing to you; and all behaving in the same way is so boring, not to mention how sad it is not to allow yourself to run through the meadows and the paths that open up to the sky, rolling among the flowers and above the clouds, chasing the stars and the moon without a single thought in mind.

Furthermore, it is not true that, as you are, no deity will ever look at you: it is during one of your wild dances that you attract the attention of two gods ― and it cannot be otherwise, since you literally end up in their arms.

How does it happen? It is the ankle that betrays you, spraining itself for a too daring turn, or you lose your balance regardless of it and roll like a crazed boulder along the side of the hill on which you are standing, without leaving time for those unfortunates to be able to understand what is happening?

The thought of having done something terrible only crosses your mind for a moment, because it is already too late: you can’t stop yourself in time, so the bodies of the two deities do it for you. Stunned by the continuous rolling, out of breath, you don’t immediately realize that you have hit something, nor do you understand why suddenly a pair of arms wrapped around your waist; then two faces enter your vision.

«Are you fine, young lady? Something hurts?»

«Let her breathe, Varuna.»

Two voices: one higher and faster, of a god with blue skin and a sweet smile, the one who holds you in his arms; the other deep and calm, belonging to a divinity of fearsome stature and eyes covered by wavy light hair. Your gaze switches from one to the other but struggles to focus on the features, until the name you have heard shakes something in your mind and a series of realizations assails you, making you pale with fear.

Never upset other deities, remember your place. Show other pantheons all the respect they deserve, especially those of Lord Zeus and Lord Shiva ― never dare to disturb them.

«I… I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to, forgive me, it will never happen again, now I have to go yes I really have to go thanks for everything», you try to excuse yourself stammering incoherently and instinctively jump to your feet, only to find yourself back on the ground with your ankle aching, cheeks burning with embarrassment and full of the desire to disappear.

It ends up that the tall and silent god has to carry you to your pantheon, and then he has to speak for you and explain what happened, because you don’t dare open your mouth even to sigh.

Mortified, you hope to forget everything quickly.

🌟

They tell you that you are always so naive, that you trust others excessively and you still need to really know the world. You are young, but you haven’t just been born: your adulthood has long since arrived, but nobody wants to recognize it, or welcome your natural light-heartedness with the same joy.

Without you being able to explain how, suddenly everyone seems to know what happened with the two deities you met, and they all have a word to say about the fact: how you should have behaved, what you should have said and done, what you haven’t done. No one cares how you felt, but everyone points out your chronic carelessness and that you don’t know how to take care of yourself, ending up bumping into the Hindu God of Water Varuna and the Lord of the Lightning, the fearsome Indra ― and, not happy, even forcing him to take you home.

The days following the accident, you find yourself surrounded by scolding looks and harsh words. No one can forbid you to dance, your movements control and allow the stars and constellations to rotate, but your mood is affected by the situation and therefore you prefer to be alone for a while, wandering through your beloved meadows without the sound of any voice or the risk to cause any dangerous action, forcing you into a painful stillness.

You are not made for the silence, everyone knows it, nor for staying away from problems; and the day you get to the top of the hill where it all began and find the “fearsome” God of Lightning sitting quietly under the tree in front of you, even though your first thought is to run away as far as possible, you don’t listen to it, or maybe you don’t really hear its voice.

The face fixed on the strangely black horizon, away from you, the gigantic deity doesn’t seem to notice you, but then he takes a drag of his cigarette and releases the smoke in one puff, creating a sort of little and cotton-like cloud that catches your attention. «Don’t worry: you can stay», says his calm, deep voice, «sit down here and breathe. Don’t walk so fast: even if your ankle seems to be better now, don’t force it.»

You obey slowly, enchanted by his tune and a little worried in your heart ― is he mad at me? He should… but it doesn’t seem to ―, then silly words tickle your throat and come out of your mouth before you can even think to stop them. It’s not the first time you have done this, not even the fear can stop you. «Lord of Lightning… do I bother you if I talk… perhaps to myself? And-and I still haven’t apologized as I should for what happened...»

Indra does not change his expression or look at you, but replies: «Your apology would break this wonderful silence, and it isn’t necessary.»

«Fine», then you whisper, «I’ll keep quiet. It’s better for everyone.»

«If you want to talk, you can do it with me!»

You jolt slightly, surprised by this lively voice behind you; a few steps away, Varuna welcomes you with a wide smile and raises his hands in apology, but in the end it is you who bows, showing all your respect. «Lord Varuna, don’t… don’t worry about me, the silence will be great. I-I have to be honest, I shouldn’t be here, I was just passing through...»

«Hmm? So would you get away from this beautiful view?» The God of Water turns his gaze and, following it, you see what he is staring at: the play of waterfalls, streams and rivers that descend from the mountains that surround you and run along the valley that opens not far away, sinuous like bodies of aquatic dragons, pointing towards the horizon. The scent that rises from them is incomparable, a dance of floral aromas and plants that draw life from the rushing waves. «Those lakes», says the deity, looking at a point that you cannot see, «and the rivers that flow into them are the most beautiful thing my eyes have ever seen.»

«Yes», you reply with enthusiasm, «the stars shine upon those waters and are reflected upon them like a million flowers in full bloom. Sometimes I follow them in their journey, but our paths soon part.»

«You are a Lady of the Stars, you already have enough beauty to watch over», Varuna whispers in a soft and peaceful tone, and you can’t help but blush slightly ― why?, «but I thank you for every time you keep the waves company. Tonight, however, there won’t be any need for it: see», and he turns to look at Indra, who continues to ignore you, «he loves to watch the thunderstorms from here. There’s one of them approaching right now.»

You widen your eyes and stare at the thundering darkness that is approaching with the speed of a thousand-legged horse, a huge black sphere that rumbles and writhes under the lash of lightning; though it is something you have seen countless times, this one seems more intense than other storms, and the vision of it magnetizes your thoughts. Even though it is completely opposite to you and all that you are, it calms you down and silences the bitterness you feel inside.

All the hill is immersed in a gentle quietness.

«If you want to go back home, now is the right time. It won’t be long before the clouds are above us.»

You rub your arms together, feeling the air get colder, but still you smile and sit more comfortably. «I don’t think the other gods are missing me, and I’ll have nothing to do for a few hours. I’ll stand here and watch as long as I want.»

«As the lady wishes.»

Astonished, you stare at Varuna handing you a blanket to face the cold, smiling warmly at you; and a thought crosses your mind with the speed of the lightning coming towards you all.

Don’t be too naive! Remember, there are gods and goddesses who want to lure, deceive and harm you! Don’t blindly trust others!

Your burning eyes, fire-like gems, probe for a long time the two figures next to you, waiting to see the fear that your pantheon has revealed to you come true; but that doesn’t happen. Either they are good at lying, or both the strong Indra and the peaceful Varuna have no intention of harming you; indeed, it seems they have forgotten about you since the storm began, their attention captured entirely by the white, thundering and powerful world that suddenly enveloped the hill.

But you don’t, you don’t forget them and the silent kindness they have shown you; nor the fact that, although far from the stars, now, here on this hill, you don’t feel like a burden to anyone.

🌟

They tell you that it is not necessary to suffer for every star that dies: it is their final fate, and not even you who govern and keep them can change it.

The stars pulsate in your hair like countless jewels: they sink in and out, swirl and shed their multicolored light, bringing gentle gleams wherever you go; but they are not immortal. A shock accompanies their disappearance when the time comes, and a tear always follows the fact: you can’t help it, they are parts of you that leave and never come back, no matter how many other stars are born. It’s a dance as necessary as it is bitter, and you doubt you’ll ever get used to it.

One day you will, so they tell you: you just have to learn to let go, to not crystallize what has been, to not stand still with what you can’t control. There is nothing more difficult because you don’t find a meaning in this loss ― and you fear nothing, except the loneliness you feel rising with every void left on you.

One evening, a star dies while you are in the company of Varuna. For some time now you have been spending most of your free moments with him and Indra, taking advantage of the storms and your nocturnal journeys to meet them. They never judge you or don’t ask you for anything, and they have no impositions to give you: it is natural for you to look for them without expecting anything in return, just desiring a little presence and peace from the tumult of your pantheon and the world around you. Sometimes, as in this case, not even the peace that they give can last long.

«Are you all right, Lady (Y/N)? You look tired, would you like to sit down for a moment?»

You realize that you have stopped and brought both hands to your head only when the words of the deity enter your mind. You look at his face, and in his suddenly worried eyes you see your sad gaze, and an invisible stab penetrates your heart. So is this what I become whenever this happens? Biting your lip, you turn away so the other god won’t see your pain, then you take a deep breath. «It is nothing», you reply, «it is… the natural state of things. No, nothing happened.»

«The natural state of… what?»

You close your eyes, thinking of keeping silent, not revealing anything. You look at the river flowing joyfully a few steps away from you, unaware of what you are feeling, then you lean over its crystalline waters and choose to speak: «Lord Varuna, will you allow me a few questions?»

«Certainly.»

«Have... have you ever suffered for the disappearance of a lake, or a river? Have you ever felt deprived of something when this happened, as if a limb had been taken away, and therefore you had to adjust to a new but unwanted condition? All the wisdom, energy and power of the water that flowed into that basin, into a pond or the sea, vanished forever, and so did its story...» A sob leaves your lips, a gasp of sadness and anger. «It’s not fair», you mutter, «Why do I have to take care of them, love them with all my heart, and then lose them like this?»

The god doesn’t answer quickly, but first he approaches you and looks in your hair, then he reaches out a hand and places it gently where the star shone a few minutes before. A cool sensation, like an icy kiss, touches your head; but you don’t pay much attention to it.

«Not even the mightiest god among us can stop the Dance of Life, it is beyond our duties. However, this does not mean that everything that moves away from you is lost: its trace remains everywhere, you can feel it and find it in every movement you make. Your stars, no one can completely separate them from you, not even the end: they remain here, continuing to add light to the brilliance of their sisters. You are literally clothed in their presence.»

«I… I don’t know», you reluctantly answer, wrapping yourself in your arms, «how can you say that with such certainty?»

Varuna smiles, then points to the river in front of you. «These waves are formed by so many lives that not even I could count them: existences that are renewed, end, begin and never go away. The stars and constellations love to be reflected in the water, and it has an infinite memory: it preserves everything that others forget, even the words we are now saying.

My dear (Y/N), if you fear that something is lost forever, confide in the water: talk to the rain, converse with the sea, and let it answer you. Trust me, and trust it.»

You no longer answer, not knowing how to do it; you let yourself be taken by the hand and guided along the road until, tired and cold, you beg Varuna to forgive you and flee to heaven before necessary, feeling an urgent need to be alone with the stars and your thoughts.

When you get home, you can’t sleep: there is a subtle disturbance inside you that doesn’t allow you to close your eyes and that the arrival of day doesn’t dissolve. You toss and turn in bed, and finally get up to look in the mirror and search for the traces of the missing stars, as Varuna said.

And then you see it.

Your eyes open wide and your heart starts pounding, while you can’t help but smile with all of yourself: in your hair, no less beautiful than the others, a star made of water catches every ray of sun and it radiates it around, waiting for your gentle touch.

🌟

«Welcome back, Lady of The Stars.»

Indra shifts his gaze from the horizon to observe your body starting to awaken from its long sleep, then lowers his eyelids and leans his back against the big tree behind him, letting the setting sun warm him with its last strength.

No matter how much time has passed, in his eyes you still are the delicate butterfly who rolled in his arms centuries ago, even if you have grown up and are now more confident and, if possible, more cheerful; but when you sleep like this, snuggled up against his side like a baby and with your face hidden under your arms, the stars in your hair lighting up the marks on his chest, he can’t help but think that whatever happens, you will always be the brightest and purest creature he has ever met.

Every storm needs to subside and give way to the grace of light: and you entered his existence, his and Varuna’s, with the same beauty as the sun rising from the sea and the star that guides home those who fear they have lost the path.

And a god related to strength, to the power of nature in its most fearsome form, can’t stand beside you? You proved him otherwise every time you ran up this hill with all the joy circulating in your body, shouting his name too loud and shaking all the flowers; yet, he waited for the sound of that voice for hours. By now, even your pantheon has surrendered to the fact that you will never be the most elegant and refined goddess that heaven will ever see, but that’s not what matters: because no one, after all, would ever trade the sweetness of your smile for something else.

Sure, he wouldn’t.

«Look at them, what an enchanting vision. Do you want a pillow, Indra?»

Before answering, the Lord of Lightning reaches out a hand and plunges it into your hair, starting to stroke it. All the stars spin and twinkle in response to his touch, and you smile in your half-sleep. «Don’t get too excited, Varuna, you risk creating floods.»

The God of the Waters raises his hands in surrender and, having reached the hill, takes a deep breath and shows his sharp teeth smiling wide. «May I join you?»

«I don’t think the lady has anything against it, nor do I.»

As soon as you feel the god’s presence near you, you instinctively reach out and wrap your arms around one of his, rubbing your cheek against his cool skin. Despite this, you continue to remain immersed in a light yet resistant sleep, so the quietness is the only owner of the place.

But not for long.

«… Is it a dream, or are my two husbands next to me?»

«Two husbands?»

Varuna widens his eyes and turns to look at you, a violent blush coloring his face and the bewildered expression as he stares at the grin and the sly gaze that appears as you raise your eyelids; Indra stops smoking the ever-present cigarette for a moment and remains motionless, then hints at a smile. «… So, a little sun would like to become my bride.» A short break, time to take a puff and direct the smoke towards the few clouds that fly over you. «… I could accept it.»

«… I-Indra?!?»

The rest is impossible to comprehend, because you burst out laughing and drown out any other noise as you leap to your feet and, grabbing both of the gods, pull them against you in a very strong embrace.

The first stars are already appearing in the sky; but none of them can ever match the light you are now shedding, happy as you are ― happy as you all are.

#record of ragnarok #shuumatsu no valkyrie #ror x reader #snv x reader #shuumatsu no valkyrie x reader #record of ragnarok x reader #Record of ragnarok indra #Shuumatsu no valkyrie indra #ror indra #snv indra #Record of ragnarok varuna #Shuumatsu no valkyrie varuna #Record of ragnarok hindu pantheon #A toast to the hindu pantheon lovers!

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the-chosen-fanfiction · 1 year

Text

Jesus | Wedding Waltz | Platonic

Dialogue prompt: “Dance with me.”

Requested: No

You don’t feel much like dancing, until the Messiah Himself offers you one as well as something different altogether.

When the wedding invitation for the son of your distant relatives Dinah and Rafi reached your household, you had been excited to go right away, unlike your father, who wasn’t keen on attending such events. Parties like these are your favourite, so you had already chosen your most beautiful tunic the day you found out Asher was getting married and had carefully selected flowers you’d braid into your hair when the day finally came.

Weddings make you feel bubbly and happy inside, hoping that one day, you’ll be the one making vows to a future spouse. Your father is still adamant on him selecting a life-long partner for you, but he has found nobody to be eligible just yet. But who can blame the potential partners who were scared away by your father’s warning glares whenever they are around you? If anything, your father only makes it more difficult for you to find a husband because of this protectiveness, that was perhaps well-intended but turned out to be a burden instead.

The day was there and you had dressed up in your finest garment that was still deemed socially acceptable lest you outshine the bride, and you had tucked matching flowers into your (h/c) hair, which you then covered with a respectable headdress, so that a few blooms were peeking out from underneath it.

Upon arrival together with your abba, he has already drawn a scowl over his face that you don’t quite understand, but you aren’t going to let him ruin your mood. Instead, you find yourself a cup of wine and mingle with some guests before the ceremony takes place.

There are a lot of people who you don’t know, including a Man Who catches your attention almost immediately. He appears to be the Son of Mary and suddenly it clicks that it must be Jesus of Nazareth, a group of students lingering around Him at all times, men and women alike. Curiously, you try to listen in on their conversations, but it feels rude to do so, so after a while, you decide to step away and instead speak to an old couple.

After the commemoration, a few artisans tune their instruments before the party truly starts, and you’re on your third cup of wine when you sit down next to your father, whose face hasn’t changed into something more joyous.

The music makes it so that your foot taps rhythmically against the floor. Softly humming along, you let your eyes go over the crowd of people, enjoying their dancing.

A hand on your knee stops your leg from moving and you look up, seeing your father giving you a warning glare. “Stop that,” he states, “You’re making me nervous.”

Sighing, you try to keep yourself still and can’t help but feel drawn to the party as well, although your father would never allow you to dance with strangers.

“Bah, this is the worst wedding I’ve ever been to.” your abba has a sour look on his face as he downs the final drops of his lukewarm wine and rolls his eyes in annoyance. “Get me another wine, why don’t you?”

He holds out his cup towards you and it takes you a second to realise that he is doing so, and it earns you a miffed click of his tongue.

“Get your head out of the clouds, (Y/n). Not sure where your mind is wandering to this time.”

Without replying - for he doesn’t expect one - you take the cup and stand to follow his request. Sighing, you head over to the staff and find a woman wearing a red headscarf. On your way there, Mother Mary brushes past you. She seems to be a little agitated by something, but you cannot quite put a finger on it.

“Excuse me,” you say to the woman with the red scarf, “May I have another serving of wine?”

She turns to you and gives you an apologetic look. Embarrassed, she leans closer to you.

“I’m sorry, but we’re… We’re out.” she mutters. “We are working on a replacement, so please, if you can wait a few more minutes, we would greatly appreciate—”

“Ramah.” A man with dark hair and a colourful coat over his tunic appears behind her. He shuffles her way a little awkwardly and whispers something in her ear, at which she blinks in puzzlement. The woman named Ramah gives you a small smile and a polite bow.

“Apologies for the inconvenience, I’ve got to go now.” She goes with her colleague and leaves you behind a bit confused, but as you turn, you come nearly chest-to-chest with nobody else than Jesus of Nazareth. You startle a bit, stepping away and looking at Him in slight shock.

“I-I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to walk into You.”

Jesus smiles - how are His eyes so warm and kind? - and shrugs. “Not to worry. May I pass you by?”

“O-Of course,” you say, heading to the side so that He can pass. With a small nod of appreciation, He brushes past you, following the two servers.

You return to your father with the empty cup and he holds out his hand already, but when you shake your head, he frowns. “What?”

“They’re working on a replacement.”

“They’re out?!” he huffs, “Unbelievable.”

He seems nearly offended that you’ve brought him such news. With a heavy heart, you take a seat next to him, longingly staring at the dance floor. People are still having a great time, but a few have already walked off, clearly noticing that something is amiss, asking for refills but not receiving them.

Plucking at a loose thread on your tunic, you sit through some time whilst your father complains about whatever ruined his mood this time. You wonder when he will decide it has been enough for the night and wants to go home.

However, the voice of the Master of the Banquet suddenly tears through the crowd, calling for the music to stop.

“Stop the music! Stop the music! Everyone, listen!”

The crowd falls silent and you crane your neck to see what is going on as all attention goes to the man in question.

“I have something I would like to say. I would like to address the bridegroom and the bride's families.”

You let your eyes go to them.

“At every wedding I've ever overseen, they serve the best wine first.And then when the people have drunk freely, much later in the feast, they serve the poorer wine, the cheap stuff.” The guests chuckle, as does your father. “Because, by then, who's going to notice, am I right?”

The Master of the Banquet pauses for a second and then turns to Dinah, the mother of the bridegroom. “But you– You've chosen now to serve the best wine I have ever tasted!” Looks of delight fall over the faces of the servers as well as the families, “Let us thank them for this unnecessary but honourable gesture!”

The crowd erupts in cheers as new cups of wine are divided.

“May the wedding of Asher, son of Rafi and Dinah, to Sarah, daughter of Abner and Helah, be as pure and as fruitful as this wine!” Everyone raises their cups, including you, whilst the Master of the Banquet calls for a toast: “Blessed are you, Lord our God, King of the universe, Who brings forth the fruit of the vine. To Asher and Sarah!”

“To Asher and Sarah!” the people repeat, and everyone takes a long sip.

The Master had not been exaggerating. The moment the liquid hits your tongue, your eyes widen in surprise. “This is incredible!” your father breathes, “The best wine I’ve ever had!”

You give him a small smile. “I agree,” you tell him, “It’s unlike any drink I’ve ever had.”

As your father excuses himself, standing to get another serving for he had thrown back the contents in one large gulp, you let your eyes go back to the crowd again. Now way more relaxed, everyone starts to continue their festivities, gushing over how good the wine is, and you slowly nurse your cup whilst observing the dancing people.

If you could only join them…

You are just downing the final sip when a sudden shadow casts itself over you, intersecting in between you and the light source of the area. Puzzled, you take your cup down and swallow thickly, finding no one other than Jesus of Nazareth standing in front of you.

He smiles slightly and gives you a small nod. “Shalom,” he greets, “How are you liking the wine?”

“I think it is really good. Abner and Sarah made a good call to wait until later to serve this.”

Jesus chuckles. “Well, I couldn’t help but see you sitting over here. That man who was constantly sulking, was that your father?”

You give Him a tight-lipped smile and nod. “Mhm. He isn’t exactly fond of parties, so whenever we attend one, he always wants me to keep him company whilst the rest goes away to have fun. I mean, I don’t want him to be lonely, but… It would be fun to be able to join in on the festivities for once.” You aren’t even sure why you tell Him this, for what could He possibly do with this information?

Jesus lets out a small hum and looks over His shoulder at his students, a few of whom wave Him over to come closer.

“Hm, your father doesn’t seem to be here right now.” Jesus says with a playful tone in His voice. “What would you say if you went with Me to my followers and enjoyed the party? Dance with Me. Just for a while. You deserve to savour this happy event, too.”

A bit abashed, you look into the crowd to see if your father is on his way yet.

“I can introduce you to my students, I’m sure that they will like you.”

You clear your throat and stand up, still a little confused.

“Why? I-I mean, why are You asking me?”

Letting out an amused sound, Jesus puts a hand on your shoulder. “Because I know you.”

You frown slightly. “You know me?”

Humming in agreement, Jesus nods towards His followers. “Shall we go?”

“Wait,” you protest, “How do You know me? I cannot recall having met You face to face before.”

“Perhaps you should speak to my followers first to see what they think of Me before I reveal these things to you, (Y/n).”

You can’t remember ever telling Him your name, but you’re already stunned enough to not question it.

“But I will tell you something else that I know, but only if we dance.”

He gestures into the mass of people and you cannot fight the smile that grows there. A few of Jesus' followers immediately head your way curiously.

“Who is this?” a woman with dark hair asks, “Is she joining us?”

“A new student?” queries another disciple.

Jesus puts His hands on the shoulders of two students who stand at both His sides, and He squeezes them gently. “My friends, enough with the questions for now. I haven’t asked her anything yet. Her name is (Y/n), that is what I can tell you, and you should wait for a while so that I can take some time to properly introduce her, hm?”

Shaking your head in puzzlement, you aren’t sure what to think. Whilst the music drifts through the air, you shuffle around as your body attempts to move with the sound, and upon noticing it, a few of Jesus’ followers decide it is indeed time to dance and be joyful about the wedding.

Betwixt a tall guy and a man with dark curls, you join the circle of friends as they begin to swing to the rhythm. With a grin spreading over your face, it feels as if you’ve been with this group of people for way longer than a few minutes. The songs follow one another as you laugh and dance and cheer, learning the names of a few of Jesus’ followers: Mary, Andrew, there are even two men called James.

Your father returns to find the bench he had been sitting on empty, only to notice you in the crowd. At first, he lets out a grumpy huff, but after a few moments, he smiles slightly.

Seeing you so carefree, happily moving around to the tune, makes him briefly reflect on his attitude towards you. For a second, he is inclined to walk into the group and drag you out, but he decides against it. Perhaps it is the wine that has him give in, but he allows it for now.

You can’t remember having so much fun before, and after a long while of dancing, you find Jesus’ gaze, and He smiles kindly at you.

“May I speak to you for a moment, (Y/n)?”

“Of course,” you say, still laughing about a joke Simon was telling you, and you give them a nod as a greeting before following Jesus to a more secluded area.

He turns to you and gives you a friendly grin. “I meant to talk to you about your situation.”

“My situation?” You’re almost offended.

“Your father,” Jesus states. “You’re unhappy.”

You sigh and cast down your eyes, embarrassed. “He-He is kind to me, pays for food and housing, and—”

“And yet.” Jesus interrupts. You let out a shivering breath and swallow thickly. “You feel like you’re trapped with him until you have a husband.”

It is as if He sees straight through you.

“Can I… Can I come with You?” your voice wavers. “I mean not to become your wife or anything! Just… Like your students!”

Chuckling, Jesus nods. “I figured that you meant that, (Y/n). And if you want to come with us, you must know that we travel far, but you’re more than welcome. But first, I think you should talk to someone about it.”

He looks at something – or rather someone – behind you, and you pivot to face your father, who is watching you with tears in his eyes.

“Why have you never mentioned this to me before?” he queries, but there is no accusing edge to his tone. You take a deep breath, shaking your head as you feel your eyes grow wet.

“Abba, how could I, if all I ever say is shut down by you? I mean no disrespect, but I cannot even tap my foot because it makes you nervous! Your constant presence scares off all potential spouses. If things remain this way, how will I ever find a purpose in life outside of taking care of you?”

Your father steps forward. “All I want is to protect you. It’s a dangerous world out there, (Y/n)! You know nothing about it.”

“Because you aren’t letting me get familiar with it!” you counter. “Please, abba, can I go with them? He is a Teacher and has a few followers who are also at this party– The people I was just dancing with!”

Your father looks at Jesus with narrowed eyes, a thoughtful look over his features.

“What do You have to teach her?”

Jesus hums. “Many things.”

“For how long will she be away? A few days? A few weeks?”

Slowly shaking His head, Jesus shrugs. “That I cannot say. We will go wherever the road leads us, and… Well, perhaps that some time apart will strengthen your relationship. It’s not healthy to constantly remain together all the time, especially with (Y/n) being an adult already. And, who knows, I’ve got a few bachelors amongst My followers…”

He is teasing, you know, but you fluster nevertheless.

Your father lightly chuckles, clearly more at ease, and bites his lip whilst he observes you for a few long moments. “Well, there is something about Him that makes me think that you’ll be fine. When are You leaving, Rabbi?”

Jesus smiles. “We can wait a day or so. Is that enough for you to get a clean tunic to bring with you?”

You eagerly nod, your heart skipping a beat. “Thank you, abba! And thank you for the opportunity, Teacher. I will not disappoint You.”

Lightly laughing, Jesus lets out a small noise. “Ah, don’t you worry about that. All I require is your heart, not your knowledge.”

Taking a deep breath, you grin widely. “Well, time for me to get that tunic, I suppose!”

Your father puts a hand on your arm and halts you in your tracks.

“Not so fast,” he says, “First, a dance?”

You look at his outstretched hand, then look at Jesus, Who gives you a gentle look, and then take it, heading over into the crowd again to introduce your father to your new friends, who you will get more familiar with in this new opportunity that lies ahead.

#the chosen #reader insert #platonic #the chosen x reader #chosen x reader #chosen fanfiction #the chosen fanfiction #the chosen jesus #jesus x reader

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typingatlightspeed · 3 months

Text

TF2 Fanfic - Comprender

Happening too close to Pyro on the field, Spy realizes why he's never been able to understand his muffled words before: he was expecting them to be in English, when Pyro's been speaking Spanish the whole time! Luckily, Spy's fluent, and suddenly Pyro's no longer isolated by a language barrier, finding a friend and connection on the lonely desert, growing deeper as the two secretive men learn more about one another.

Ao3 Link!

Based on a request/headcanon sent to me by @candygrahm, though I'll admit I went a bit off-script and leaned into the language aspect a bit more. I hope you'll forgive me, Grahm!

Warnings: Discussion of Pyro having psychosis re: Pyroland, but it's just sort of a fact of life for ya boy. I tried to be as respectful as I could in the portrayal, but if I stumbled in the attempt, let me know. I don't wanna be a dick by accident, yanno?

Also, apologies if the Spanish is wonky.

---------

Spy ducked through a doorway a bare moment before a rocket followed him through it, screaming across the room to slam into concrete and detonate, sending chunks of cement and shrapnel flying, peppering him with a light spray of pebbles. A failed gambit had left him with his ass hanging out in the wind and the enemy Soldier on his tail for his trouble. He drew his knife and waited, trying to steady his breaths in case the rowdy American had given chase, but when enough time passed that he was sure he was safe, he sighed and collapsed against the wall beside the door for a moment, letting his heart finally slow a bit.

The defense of Gravel Pit was not going well, the BLUs operating with ruthless efficiency that day. It was getting exhausting, constantly playing catch-up, and Spy was finding it trickier and trickier to get behind enemy lines in time to make a difference. Their Engineer was quick on moving up their teleporter and defending it, and he was having a hell of a time catching up to his nest, let alone making inroads to it. The whole lot of them were twitchy and hyper-skeptical of one another, spy-checking with unusual frequency. He idly wondered if their superiors had given them hell for getting sloppy, and they were now overcompensating.

Unfortunately, it was working.

A ruckus approached, the sound of voices and heavy bootfalls rushing from RED’s side. It was music to Spy’s ears. His team was finally pushing back, and he could make out the voices of Soldier and Scout calling orders to one another. Soldier would hold them down with rocket fire while Scout flanked and tried to catch eye of the enemy’s positions to report on-mic. The muffled voice of Pyro mumbled out something, and Soldier simply replied, “Pyro, you’re with me. I need airblast support.”

Pyro replied, sounding a bit grumpy at his words being ignored, but they continued on, regardless.

Spy couldn’t help making a face. He had no idea what Pyro had said; he never did. Nobody ever did, really. It was a known fact that nobody on the team tried to hide, so he could barely be justified in sounding so put-out at whatever he had said being ignored. That mask muffled everything he said so much that he was basically unintelligible.

All the same, it had to be frustrating, to be so alienated, your words impossible to parse by your own team, the men you lived and died fighting beside. Spy let out a little sigh at that thought. It was tragic, in its way, and he couldn’t help a pang of empathy in spite of himself.

A new battle plan began to take over Spy’s thoughts as he returned to focusing on his job. He would wait for Soldier, Pyro, and Scout’s distraction, and use the cover to slip past the lines under cloak. Now he just needed to wait for the chaos.

Explosions rang out along with Soldier’s telltale scream. There was that chaos, right on time.

Spy slapped the cloak button on his watch and practically dove out of the building in which he hid, racing across the field as fast as his feet would carry him. He skirted close to his team as he rounded a corner, but the sound of Pyro’s voice caught him blisteringly off-guard.

It was muffled as always, but for the first time, Spy understood what he was saying, ringing out as clear as it could from behind rubber and filters, "¡Que les den por el culo!"

Spy’s eyes went wide, his head snapping to the side to look, seeing Pyro cheering Soldier on as he erupted into the air off of a rocket jump and began to bombard the other team from above. One gloved hand pumped his fist in the air while the other hefted his flamethrower, laughter forcing its way through his mask in bloodthirsty glee. So distracted was the rogue that he didn’t see the piece of debris in his way until his foot caught it, and he went tumbling ass over teakettle into the dust, his watch shorting out. A blue laser dot flicked past his vision.

Spy awoke in respawn, the lights blinding him as he opened fresh eyes. He was alone, which spoke well for his teammates’ offensive, so he took a moment to compose himself. He lit a cigarette and took a drag, slowly leaving respawn as he mulled over what he’d just witnessed.

He’d heard it. It wasn’t plain as day; nothing could be when garbled through a gasmask. But he’d heard it. Pyro had yelled to Soldier to, “fuck their asses”. In Spanish. Realization dawned on Spy, and he wondered if the reason he’d never been able to parse what Pyro was saying was the simple fact that he’d been trying to decipher his muffled mumbles into English.

He suddenly felt deeply foolish. And deeply curious. He had to know for sure.

For the rest of the match, he kept an ear out for Pyro. They rarely crossed paths on the field, the gap between offense and support a large one, particularly for their specific specialties, but whenever he found himself passing by, Spy tried, regardless.

"¡Mierda!”

“¡Sos más feo que pisar mierda descalzo!”

“¡Me cago en to madre!”

Spy fought to keep himself down to mere snickers through the rest of the match, but it was after a failed push and the absolute botch of a sticky trap led himself, Pyro, and Demoman to awaken in respawn at the same time, followed by the arsonist grumbling at an already-leaving Demoman, “Tus padres deben ser hermanos ¿no?” that Spy finally broke.

He snorted in spite of himself, trying and failing to hold back the bark of a laugh that forced its way out of him. He doubled over, bracing himself on his thighs as he giggled, heaving out the giddy amusement that had been simmering in him for half the match. Pyro turned to him and stared through blank, black lenses.

“¿Lo has entendido?” Pyro asked, standing up straight, reeling away from Spy in shock.

“Claro que si,” Spy assured him, hefting out a last giggle and wiping his eyes, finally standing back up and composing himself.

“No sabía que hablabas español.”

Spy merely smirked in reply. “But now I know that you do.” With a nod and a smile, he strode out to rejoin the match, leaving Pyro standing there staring after him in surprised silence.

After the match, Pyro caught up with Spy in the hallway to their quarters, caging him in to stop him in his tracks. “How long have you understood me?” he asked, muffled Spanish through his mask sounding perhaps more breathless than usual.

“I am fluent, you know,” Spy dodged with a smirk, stopping to lean casually against the wall. He withdrew a cigarette from his case and snapped it shut, holding the unlit smoke between his fingers.

“That’s not an answer and you know it. How long have you understood me and not said a single fucking word?”

The words were simple, but the tone cut to the quick. How long have I thought I was alone? How long have you let me suffer, thinking I wasn’t understood by anyone? Why?

Spy shook his head and lit his cigarette, taking a long drag. He hated playing his hand, but the hurt in Pyro’s voice was unfair to allow to exist. He liked playing with people. He was a bastard. But he wasn’t a monster . “Truly? Since you told Soldier to fuck the BLU team’s asses earlier today.”

“What?”

“It paints me in a poor light. A spy who’s worked with a man for half a year and hadn’t sussed out what language he even spoke, but I hope you’ll forgive me for not too readily parsing that what was already deeply mangled by rubber and filters wasn’t the same language the rest of the team was using.”

“…so you were expecting English, so you never realized it wasn’t?”

“Shamefully,” Spy chuckled ruefully. “You understand English, though. That much is clear from how you react when the others talk.”

“Mostly, yes. But I don’t like to speak it. It’s…hard to put together my thoughts into words.”

“Understandable. I felt similarly about English when I learned it, as well. Too many synonyms that have very small differences in tone. And very little patience from English speakers for imprecision.”

“Yes! They jam three languages together, call it one, and get mad when you don’t know every little nuance like it’s obvious! Most of them don’t even know what most of their words mean! It’s shit!”

Spy chuckled at that, and Pyro laughed in turn, bouncing a little on the balls of his feet excitedly. “ But yes. You’re not so alone as you thought, though from the others’ dossiers, I fear I am the only other Spanish speaker here.”

“Engie knows a few words, but not enough to have a conversation. I can ask him basic things, like where, or when, and he can gesture and say numbers, but not much else. It works, but it’s not the same, you know? I know more English than he does Spanish, but not enough spoken to really hold a conversation with him, either. Not unless we’re writing things down.” Pyro looked down, regarding his own boots for a long moment. “I’m not exactly a strong reader regardless of language, though.”

“I’ll be sure not to bother becoming pen-pals, then,” Spy teased, earning him a half-hearted swat from Pyro in reply.

The rest of the work week had been an exercise in escalating attempts at cracking one another during combat. Pyro had pulled out all of the stops, making sure to try and clock when Spy was nearby before pulling out his best battlefield shit-talk, and Spy in reply had made it his mission to sneak past Pyro with a few choice jokes on his way to the front. They would laugh and compare jokes and kills off the field, chattering animatedly in the locker room and at dinner, leaving the rest of the team to stare in wonderment at the absolute change in both men. The sassy-if-incomprehensible arsonist and the snide, aloof rogue laughed and carried on like old friends.

One quiet evening, they found themselves in the rec room, Pyro staring blankly at the television through smoky lenses while Spy tried and failed to read a magazine.

“You say something?” Pyro asked, half-turning.

Spy shook his head. “No, but while I have your attention …what does it look like, to you?” he asked, finally setting his magazine down, curiosity too strong to keep pretending he was doing anything else.

“What does what look like?”

“The television. The battlefield. Life. What do you see when you look at me?”

Pyro seemed to deflate in his spot, seated on the floor with his legs crossed under himself. “You know about my psychosis.”

“Yes.”

“You pulled my dossier.”

Spy only tried a little bit to look scandalized. “I am a spy, after all.”

Pyro sighed. “I have hallucinations. Auditory and visual. What it tends to be and how severe depends on the situation. Day to day it’s mostly colours and perspective shifting sometimes. Fire always looks so beautiful, like colours melting up into the sky. Sometimes I’ll see birds where there aren’t any, which really sucks with Medic keeping doves in the base and all. Sometimes I’ll hear music in the distance, or think I hear someone say something when they didn’t.”

“Is that why you asked me if I said something? I’ve noticed you do that sometimes.”

“Yeah. When I’m alone sometimes I’ll see someone walk into the room and have to check if anyone actually did or not. Usually throw something. If it bounces off then they’re real.”

Spy nodded, pursing his lips. “I suppose it makes you predisposed to spy-checking.”

That earned a laugh, and Pyro fully turned from the television to look up at Spy. “Got me there.”

“What situations make it more severe, if it varies?”

“Work, usually. Anything where I’m stressed or overstimulated can kick it into high gear, which is why I keep the gas mask on outside work hours. Helps keep things from getting overwhelming when the guys are around, getting all rowdy . But when it gets stronger? Stuff changes. Everything gets brighter. Colours go pastel, and everything sparkles and shines. Screams sound like giggles. The BLUs look like babies, and fire like sparkles and colours. Blood and guts become gears and machinery and confetti. It’s…a lot.”

“Almost like your mind is trying to protect you from your own actions.”

“I don’t know if I’d read that far into it, but yeah, it’s almost disorienting. Landscape doesn’t change, though, and I can still do what I do once I parse out what everything is. I tend not to see things that aren’t there then, at least. Just, kind of like it lays over everything.”

“There is nothing to be done to control it?”

“Why try? I can do my job just fine, and have fun while I do it. I’m in control the whole time.” Pyro scoffed. “Not like it’s gonna turn me into some kind of axe murderer or something.”

Spy snorted a laugh at that. “Fair enough, I suppose. If you ever need something confirmed as real or not, I will be happy to assist.”

“I’ll keep that in mind.”

“ Happy father’s day!”

Pyro stood in the doorway of Spy’s quarters and held out a bottle of whiskey with a bow on it, tilting his head to the side in a masked approximation of cheerfulness.

Spy looked down at the bottle and back up to Pyro in horror. “What—”

“You’re not the only one who can pull dossiers,” Pyro teased, pushing the bottle into Spy’s hands, “ Papi.”

The rogue pursed his lips. What a little shit. “You little shit.”

Pyro couldn’t help a laugh at that. “Don’t worry, I’m sure you know a lot of it is redacted anyway. Still, it’s surprising! You strike me as the kind of man who’s careful with his liaisons.”

“Yes, well, it wasn’t a matter of being irresponsible when bedding femme fatales in exotic locales like spy novels would have you believe ,” Spy huffed, retreating back into his quarters to set the bottle down, the unspoken invitation to enter taken as Pyro slipped in behind him and closed the door. “Young love, I suppose. She was ravishing. I was foolish enough to think that I could settle down in spite of the life I’ve lead, that it wouldn’t catch up with me and force me to run away from what we were trying to build together. Not that I tried to fight for it, either. She deserved better, and my son…he was barely walking when I left. Hopefully he doesn’t remember me.”

“Dossier said he was born in ‘45. He’s Scout’s age; a whole-ass man by now.”

Spy swallowed hard, freezing a bit as he waited for Pyro to say anything else. He tried his best to school away any suggestion that he was panicking in his own head, that somehow the arsonist had extrapolated the truth from very incomplete information. When nothing else was said, he simply said, “Yes. And likely more than a man than I was when I left him.”

Pyro visibly deflated, his attempt at a bit of playfulness turning swiftly tragic. He approached Spy, laying a hand on his friend’s shoulder. “If he’s even half the man you are, he’s better than all of the rest of us.”

Spy smiled softly, turning and looking into the darkened lenses of his masked companion. “ You’re too kind.”

The scuffed, scratched, abused wooden floors of RED’s hallways were warm under Pyro’s bare feet, the heat of the desert that permeated the structure throughout the day never quite bleeding away from its interior in the cold of night. His soles slapped against the warped, uneven surface as he padded his way through the base, wandering aimlessly in frustration. Sleep was not only not coming easily, it wasn’t coming at all, and enough tossing and turning and staring at the ceiling in frustration, watching phantom shapes dance in the dark, had chased him from his bed in aggravation. So he paced the halls, looking for something, anything to distract him from sleep that would not come.

A crack of light arced across the floor, seeping out from under a door. Pyro’s eyes followed it to the door itself, and he realized he was standing in front of Spy’s smoking room. Finding it occupied wouldn’t normally be a surprise, save for the late hour. Tugging his mask down over his face, he tried the door. It was unlocked, so he slipped inside.

Spy lounged on his sofa, which he had pulled in front of his fireplace, watching the flames dance with an almost-empty rocks glass of whiskey in one hand, the end of a cigarette in his other. When the opposite end of the sofa sagged, he looked over to see Pyro settling in. His purple and pink unicorn-themed pajamas provided an interesting counterpoint to the gasmask he wore. Spy smiled a little, flicking the butt of his cigarette into the fireplace. “You can’t sleep either?”

“Yeah. Surprised to see you up this late.”

“I often am. Sleep and I are fickle lovers, sometimes enemies. Passing ships in the night.”

“You have insomnia?”

“Nightmares. And insomnia as a frequent result. So I comfort myself in what ways I can, in hopes that sleep comes peacefully for me in time.”

“Watching the fire is comforting.”

“Having company, doubly so.”

A comfortable silence fell between them as they stared into the warm glow of the fire. Yellows, oranges, reds, whites, and subtle blues danced before Spy, while a panoply of colours joined them to Pyro’s reckoning, enchanting them both with its lazy gyrations. Pyro tugged his legs up under himself, sitting cris-cross on the sofa, cozying into the plush cushions.

“Having company means a lot,” he said, speaking English for the first time that Spy had ever heard. His words were slow, halting, and felt unfamiliar in his mouth. But nonetheless, he’d used the language, and Spy’s smile grew wider.

Pyro had been alone, barely understood, isolated by a language barrier he thought insurmountable. And then Spy had changed it all in a moment.

“Being understood is what all humans want,” Spy replied warmly.

He was sure Pyro was beaming under his mask, the way his body language straightened up in excitement. “ That, and to have a good time,” he added, returning to words that were more comfortable for him.

Spy chuckled softly, he gaze turning back to the fire, “If I continue providing understanding, will you continue showing me such a good time?”

He heard a warm laugh, and shifting beside him. Pyro’s voice came unmuffled, “It’s a deal.”

Spy looked back to him in surprise, to his face illuminated by the fire, and felt his heart skip a beat. He wasn’t sure what he’d figured the man would look like, but he was entirely more handsome than he’d been prepared for.

Pyro noticed Spy staring and grinned. “Expected more burn scars, huh?”

Spy averted his eyes, grateful that his own mask hid the pinkness of his cheeks. “You’d be a terrible pyro if you were getting yourself burnt up all of the time,” he demurred.

Pyro hefted out a laugh. “It would be like if you were covered in knife wounds.”

“I’ll elect to keep my gloves on, then. More of my youth and the safety of my fingers than I like was spent on learning balisong tricks.” At Pyro’s answering laugh, he did give in a bit. “I will offer you this, however.” He set his drink down on the carpeted floor and took hold of his mask at the neckline. In a smooth motion, he tugged it free of his head, immediately sinking one hand into his hair and combing at it to try to fluff some body back into it.

Pyro turned his gaze fully from the fire, a blush racing across his face as he beheld Spy’s sharp nose, his salt-and-pepper hair, and the even paler patches of skin that didn’t see the sun of the battlefield. “Why would you ever cover such a nice face?”

“Well, when you’re this handsome, it tends to make you a lot of enemies.”

Pyro shifted his legs out from under himself and leaned into Spy’s personal space. “Just enemies?”

Spy didn’t need any words for a proper response; his reply was to meet Pyro in a kiss. Giddy laughter bubbled out of Pyro as he wrapped his arms around Spy and fairly tackled him onto the couch, kissing him back with delight. Winding his long arms around the smaller man, Spy spoke to him wordlessly, his skilled tongue finding yet more ways to ensure that Pyro understood exactly what he meant.

#TF2 #Team Fortress 2 #TF2 Fanfiction #TF2 Fanfic #TF2 French Toast #TF2 Spy #TF2 Pyro #candygrahm

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catsvrsdogscatswin · 9 months

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Binged Nocturne yesterday, so here are my spoilery thoughts on the matter, in no particular order:

Watching this season was certainly an experience. Neither I nor my sibling have any knowledge of the Castlevania games beyond "there's a guy named Alucard who kills his dad multiple(?) times and also Belmonts are the player characters probably," so it's not like we were expecting anything, but there were a lot of "oh wouldn't it be funny if" or "I bet they'll do X" moments BUT THEN THEY ACTUALLY DID. "Why don't we continue this conversation somewhere more comfortable?" (Oh lol he's gonna fuck that priest.) *smashcut to Orlox and Mizrak naked in a bed together* (OH WAIT WHAT?!!?!)

"There's an underground secret passage to the abbey." (Uh yeah and how do YOU know that? 'I bet she fucked that old man.' Pfff I bet she did. 'I bet he's Maria's dad.' Ehhhh I mean maybe? Bit far-fetched.) "But then we wouldn't have had Maria!" (*unified unholy gibbon screeching*)

(I'm not saying this series is bad, I'm just going to be a little disappointed if absolutely nobody from the original series gets even mentioned.) *Alucard shows up at the very last second* (Oh we are winning this season! 'We are WINNING!')

Orlox served astronomical levels of cunt and I hope he continues to hang around being a nebulous problem for everybody else for the rest of the series. And then go be evil and gay somewhere else at the end, like Striga and Morana.

While I respect the power move of Drolta's heel-less platforms and the environmental storytelling of "ooh wow look how vampires can balance effortlessly on floating heels like it's nothing" personally speaking it did look a bit. weird. Like just give her stilettos, man.

Drolta was otherwise an absolute delight to watch for every moment of her time onscreen and her character design was absolute peak. Every outfit and hairstyle was immaculate.

Maybe this is just me having read up on her a lot, but having Erzebet Bathory be mixed with the Egyptian goddess Sekmet was... jarring. She was a Hungarian noble and had absolutely fuck-all to do with anything further south than the European frontier of the Ottoman Empire, so even the "drank a goddess's blood and got possessed a little bit" still feels cobbled-together and forced.

Personally speaking, I think it would've served the writer's "dread vampire Messiah come to swallow the sun and usher in a new age of blood and doom" purpose if they had EITHER the vampire Erzebet Bathory who committed all of her (mostly mythical/exaggerated) serial killing crimes and then some, OR an ancient vampiress infected by drinking a goddess's blood. You either pull the cachet of an infamous vampire-tangential historical figure or make up a story about a vampire being consumed by and becoming a channel for something more powerful than even them out of whole cloth, but please don't do both. Especially when both versions originally had nothing to do with each other.

We all none of us deserve Eduoard. I hope he gets to transform into something more human-looking by the end of the series (so he doesn't get mobbed) and then go home to his nameless boyfriend and live happily ever after. Maybe after kicking the Abbot's teeth in, since he deserves it.

Speaking of which, this was Annette's season. Richter may have had his name on the tin but this season was for her and she killed it. Absolutely stole the show, man.

I love the way her summoning was animated and find her realistic for both her age and her time period in terms of enthusiasm for revolution and a tendency to act with emotion rather than thought, but Maria was just kinda... also here. Presumably she'll have more to do next season.

#Castlevania Nocturne #Castlevania Nocturne spoilers #Castlevania spoilers #spoilers

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cilil · 2 months

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Day 5 ~ Love & Creation

𓂃🖋 Characters/pairings: Gothmog x Eönwë 𓂃🖋 Synopsis: Eönwë has been experiencing strange feelings for his enemy out of all people and decides to write him a letter. 𓂃🖋 Warnings: / 𓂃🖋 Oneshot (~1k) | AO3

Gothmog,

admittedly I do not know why I am choosing to write this letter. Perhaps it is a mere flight of fancy that you will rightfully ridicule me for, or it may not even reach Angband, as a land of fire and ice like the one your lord rules over is rather perilous for ink and paper. Either way, I apologise in advance if this letter causes you any trouble or distress, but I have nobody to turn to, and you are the only one I may in good conscience speak to regarding this matter.

I enjoyed our recent encounters. It may not have seemed that way, I know, but I did. I also realise we were both merely following orders from our lords, and the fact that we had conversations beyond that could be regarded as inappropriate by our respective sides already.

Nevertheless, for all the posturing and bickering, I found myself feeling strangely... understood? While my peers around me know me as a capable warrior, few ever ponder the implications of it, accepting my efforts to be gentle in nature regardless, whereas you see violent acts, no matter who commits them, as something necessary, something to be viewed with pragmatism. In my opinion a little too nonchalant, if I may add, but I will not deny that your stance was strangely refreshing.

I feel that I could confess to you, my enemy out of all people, the worst I have done and the worst I have thought about doing and you would not even flinch. You would not be afraid of me. You would not think less of me. At worst you would accuse me of hypocrisy; though I assure you that I am trying my best, just as I suppose you do, evidenced by your rather impressive record of foul deeds.

I will also admit that merely writing these lines makes me wish to speak to you in person, so I could indeed confess all these things to someone who will simply accept that part of my nature. Perhaps you are even laughing as you read this, wondering how a Maia born for war could have such strange feelings about their very nature.

But I know you do understand. I know I never saw you among the Maiar of Almaren, and you revealed to me that you and your kin were never welcome among us and became the first to follow your lord. You know how it is when parts of your being are dangerous and unacceptable to others.

I wonder if you ever wished you could change, though I am not so naive as to believe that you would entertain such a conversation through letters, if the very premise of this one has not already invoked your ire or disdain. And perhaps embracing the worst of Ainurin nature has at least freed you from your doubts, which is something I may, willingly or not, condemn, but am able to acknowledge.

I know you cannot, will not and are most likely unwilling to help me, and I do not expect you to. In fact, I would already be grateful and honoured if you read this far. However, what I will ask of you is that we meet again. I cannot explain the desire to be in your company, as strange as it may sound, though hopefully you will find it flattering at least.

If you are willing to see me again, of our own accord and without orders to constrain us this time, you can entrust a message to the bird I sent you, or come to the northern wastes near Helcaraxë at the next full moon, if correspondence by letter is not agreeable to you. I shall be watching and waiting, and you have my word that I have no intention to attempt to deceive you. As long as you extend the same courtesy to me, there will be no need for weapons and bloodshed; for I must warn you, I shall not let myself be trapped or captured easily.

I hope to see you soon. Eönwë

Gothmog's brow furrowed. It was such a silly idea, to write what amounted to a strange sort of confession and send it to a Balrog, the kind of Maia that was notoriously on fire, but also sweet in a way.

He had, that much he had to admit, conversed with Eönwë in a friendlier manner than he usually would, finding himself irrevocably taken with his effortless beauty and precious mannerisms, from the pompous posturing to the furious blushing to the various bird-like behaviours he displayed.

It was a pity, Gothmog had often thought, that such a creature was both too pure and innocent and too determined to follow his master's morals, seemingly forever out of his reach, while also far too strong and capable to simply be claimed and possessed by someone like him. Even if he had decided to resort to violence to get what he wanted, he knew Eönwë would have likely defeated him — in a fair fight at least — yet it only made him more endearing and desirable to him.

And now Gothmog had been granted a rare blessing, an improbable streak of good fortune: His favourite enemy wanted to talk to him and see him.

It seemed too good to be true, to the point where he should perhaps wonder if he was being lured into a trap after all, but he doubted it — the letter felt too honest in its chaotic, almost desperate pouring out of Eönwë's heart, addressed to someone who, as far as the poor herald was aware, might not care to hear it. Also the good thing about being an enemy of the forces of light was that they were far less prone to lies and deception, with Manwë and his flock of avian servants being the worst offenders when it came to candour.

Gothmog proceeded to hide the letter in a pile of rocks immediately and curled up next to it. He was going to sleep on this — quite literally — and once the next full moon rose, he would indeed go to meet Eönwë. Maybe, he wondered as he closed his eyes, the pretty bird would let him pet his wings if he listened to him in return.

Thanks for reading! ♡

taglist: @angbangbaby @a-world-of-whimsy-5 @blauerregen @bluezenzennie @edensrose @elanna-elrondiel @eunoiaastralwings @i-did-not-mean-to @just-little-human @melkors-big-tits @singleteapot @stormchaser819 @urwendii @wandererindreams

#gothmog #eonwe #eönwë #gothmog x eonwe #firebird #silmarillion fanfiction #silm fanfic #silmarillion #cílil writes #my writing #silmarillionepistolary

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ozcarr · 8 months

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You ever get really bored and just make up a little group of campy sci-fi guys for funzies?

Anyway, give it up for the crew of Star Cruiser 99. I made up extensive lore for them between work calls, under the cut.

When the entire captain’s annex mysteriously broke off vacation liner Star Cruiser 99, several randomly assigned emergency away teams were sent out do a perimeter of the area, one of which was headed by security officer Gillian Vega. Vega’s team strays a little too far from the 99’s charted path while exploring separated annex debris and ends up encountering some sort of space anomaly or wormhole because it’s a genre staple! They lose contact and tracking on their mothership, but find evidence of an escape pod launch from captains annex and are lead to believe the captain may be close, so they decide to continue their recovery mission — but now they’re stuck in uncharted space, the trail is running cold, and they have no way home.

Vega is smart and good at her job… but just transferred from a very human-majority quadrant of the galaxy and is still experiencing an adjustment period. She dreams of captaining her own explatory space vessel one day and thinks being the leader of the away team that recovers the captain of the 99 would fast-track her career. But as the days turn into weeks, she finds herself really growing into her small-crew-acting-captian position. And she starts to sort of hope that they don't find the captain. Which makes her feel really guilty. Which distracts her from the rest of the crew’s weird dynamics. It's a whole thing.

Nobody really gets Thomas from the security team and that's okay! He doesnt mind really. He's telepathic so he can read everyone's thoughts (excluding Killgore), but he doesn't usually comment on other people's internal monologs. Really good listener. He knows something is going on between Phoebe and Kurzweil but there’s inconsistencies in their memories and Thomas can’t really get a read what their relationship is.

Phoebe V ("V" is pronounced "Five") is an engineer and was really popular on the 99 before The Incident. She's always fiending for gossip, an has been trying to get closer to Thomas (everyone assumes it’s because she assumes he has dirt on everyone, but is it about something else?) Now that she's been stuck in close proximity with the same 4 people for weeks... she's going a little stir-crazy and everyone can tell.

Doctor Killgore is almost cartoonishly evil and nobody except Vega seems to picking up on it. He's always saying bond villain type shit, and Vega's always like "guys I think Killgore might actually be dangerous." And everyone else just brushes it off like "he's obviously joking about killing us! What, you don't think he's capable of humor or something? Wow Vega, examine your biases..."

Killgore doesn't talk about his life before the 99 which leaves Vega with a lot of questions, namely "w...why is he called that", "why would a medical droid look like that", and "who's vitals are being displayed on that heart monitor?"

Kurzweil works in passenger services and was hired at a Starbase recruitment fair 2 weeks before The Incident. He only volunteered for the away mission in hopes it would earn him some respect among his peers. Even before the mission, he was prone to accidents and he keeps putting himself in dangerous situations which almost always end in head trauma — much to Killgore's thinly-veiled delight.

His species must be extremely resilient because he's always able to walk it off after an hour of downtime in the shuttle's back medical room (albeit with some memory loss). His accidents are seemingly random but now Vega is starting to notice patterns and is beginning to think something nefarious is afoot, whether Kurzweil knows it or not.

I don’t want to fully elaborate what’s going on because… I’m starting to think this would make a fun little mystery visual novel. But I don’t currently have the skills or patience to pull that off. So I’ll just throw this on the back burner to simmer while I decide if perusing it’s worth the effort haha.

#drawings that violate the Geneva Conventions but I don’t give a shit #a lot of them are named after/loosely based on songs but I will not elaborate further #oc #character design #scifi #alien #robot #Star cruiser 99 #my art

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markantonys · 2 years

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towers of midnight prologue-chapter 16

the opening quote is from loial’s book about rand!!!! which must therefore get finished and published!! i feel like a proud mother!!!

graendal DID escape! you can’t keep a girlboss down. i suspected she might have because it seemed too anticlimactic an end and No Body No Death (honestly i kept suspecting sammael wasn’t really gonna be dead since iirc rand balefired him from somewhat of a distance and didn’t really see him go down, but then i think moridin confirmed that sammael was balefired and is beyond resurrection), but i wasn’t sure how it could’ve been possible - turned out that it was actually aran’gar and delana who did the compulsion on the guy rand sent in and they were balefired, thus undoing the compulsion.

i love how everyone keeps saying “we must march for the last battle” and then they just set right out for it. like, where are you going? nobody sent out invites for the date, time, and place of the last battle. are y’all just gonna show up at shayol ghul and hope for the best?

we catch up with galad, who’s leading 7,000 whitecloaks through a swamp. “i refuse to feel [the swamp’s] bite, for i am proud.” proud of being a fuckin whitecloak?

“valda’s misdeeds had tarnished the entire order.” you mean more than they’d already tarnished themselves by being a whole organization dedicated to persecuting channelers?

“doing what was right was the most important thing in life.” then why are you a fuckin whitecloak?

“the children have met...hostility [in andor].” as they should!

“light send that elayne held the lion throne.” she does and she will kick you and your friends’ asses for being fuckin whitecloaks. good luck getting sanctuary from her!

okay it’s out of my system now. (update from rereading this after having finished writing the whole post: [narrator voice] it was not out of her system.) i do like galad but i think that he deserves 100x more bullying than gawyn does and yet he gets 100x less, so i have to even it out!

but for some equal opportunity bullying: “light send that [elayne] had escaped the tangles of the aes sedai, though he feared the worst.” trakand brothers realize that elayne is an intelligent adult capable of making her own decisions challenge.

“there were many who would use her as a pawn, al’thor not the least of them.” hey! show your double brother (half-brother and brother-in-law) some respect! “she was headstrong and that could make her easy to manipulate.” as opposed to you, galad, the absolute pinnacle of wisdom and worldliness. i’m certain nobody has ever found YOU easy to manipulate!

“to abandon the children now, after killing their leader, would be wrong.” actually it would be right because then they would be in chaos and could be wiped out! “it’s as simple as that to you, isn’t it?” “it should be as simple as that to anyone.” well SOMETIMES i like galad, other times he is too holier-than-thou for my tastes. lawful good characters don’t tend to be my cup of tea. or lawful anything characters. i love my neutrals and chaotics.

in conclusion, i’m here to report Yet Again that everything about galad’s whitecloak storyline hits VERY different for a show-first person, and i’m wondering how the show could ever make the audience not despise him for the rest of the show’s run after he joins them lmao that’ll be interesting to see. like, i can only retain respect and affection for book!galad by separating the book!whitecloaks (largely nonthreatening buffoons with a hidden evil sector that galad didn’t find out about until much later) from the show!whitecloaks - who might be set up in that same way where galad and the average whitecloak is unaware of valda and co’s crimes, but since the audience was introduced to valda and co first and not “regular” whitecloaks, that’ll be a hard sell.

fain pov talks about Worms. what the fuck are these Worms. i don’t want to know but i will surely find out soon.

i almost forgot that fain got the dagger from the tower and still has it. so maybe mat’s dagger plotline does indeed have more left to come! i kinda wish it was already wrapped up tho, mat has too much on his plate (despite having spent several books dicking around on a circus roadtrip). rj planning the books was like “rand gets the chosen one storyline and all it entails, mat gets the dagger and the horn of valere and luck and ancient memories and military strategy skills and a whole army and the aelfinn & eelfinn and the seanchan and a prophecy hero/villain romance, perrin gets uhhhh [shuffles through notes to see what’s left] wolves i guess” lmao i would love it if the show took the same approach as @butterflydm’s fic series and gave the horn to perrin (since it seems he’ll be on the hunt for the horn in s2 and mat won’t) because mat has way too many Things going on and should offload some to perrin who doesn’t have enough! but idk how likely that is since i think the average book fan would riot if show!mat didn’t get to blow the horn (which, okay i’m sure it’ll be relevant again at the last battle and maybe i’ll eat my words then, but so far it’s been such a tiny part of mat’s storyline that i don’t understand why people are so attached to it)

me: ugh i don’t care about this random farmer me finding out that this random farmer was the guy who gave rand and mat a ride on his cart during the Great Cauthor Roadtrip:

as seen here and with hurin’s reappearance last book, all you have to do to get an emotional reaction out of me is to connect something to The Good Old Days!

rand’s giving some real jesus vibes in this scene. just wandering up out of nowhere dressed in ragged clothes, causing miracles, dropping some cryptic yet comforting words of wisdom for the times ahead, making those who see him feel oddly safe and at peace.

but god rand is so funny here. the farmer’s like hey did you get lost in the mountains and rand says, “no. i’m not lost. finally. it feels like a great long time since i’ve understood the path before me.” and then the farmer says that if rand was hoping to hunt then he went the wrong way because there’s nothing back there of use and rand says, “i wouldn’t say that. there are always things of use around, if you look closely enough. you can’t stare at them too long. to learn but not be overwhelmed, that is the balance.” like bro jdkjfgh you need some refresher lessons in how to interact with normal people in a normal way. he went from darth rand straight to jesus rand and did not stop on any middle ground.

“you’re him, aren’t you? the one they’re talking about?” “it is likely. men are often speaking of me.” because men are obsessed with him and want to fuck him and he knows it.

“meeting those eyes, almen felt a strange sense of peace.” just the opposite of how everybody felt meeting rand’s eyes pre-epiphany!

galad wakes up imprisoned in asunawa’s camp and discovers that - offscreen - asunawa & co have been murdered by whitecloaks loyal to galad and he is now officially lord captain commander. too easy a victory but the last battle is coming so things have gotta move along.

“galad didn’t feel wise or strong enough to bear the title he did.” as if lord captain commander of the whitecloaks is a title that deserves any respect whatsoever. “but the children had made their decision. the light would protect them for it.” no actually i hope the light DOESN’T protect them.

i continue to be frustrated that galad’s “joining an organization whose entire ideology is based around considering people like his mother and sister darkfriends who must be eradicated” plotline resolved in “galad leading that organization and handily removing the few corrupt guys whereas the rest are good actually” instead of “galad realizes the entire organization is fucked up and destroys it from the inside” but whatever

i WILL say that later on perrin notes that all the “good” whitecloaks do smell rabid/crazy/whatever and galad is The Only One who smells normal, so maaaaaaaaybe there is still hope for galad to finally wake up the rest of the way and destroy the organization for good? but i won’t hold my breath.

“[egwene] stepped into her dream, and into [gawyn’s] embrace. they stood in a small stone-walled room shaped like her study in the tower, yet decorated like the common room of her father’s inn. gawyn was dressed in sturdy two rivers woolens and did not wear his sword. a more simple life. it could not be hers, but she could dream...” 😭 egwene has always been the most ready, nay EAGER, of the ef5 to accept her duty and leave dreams of a simple life behind, so it really Gets me when she feels wistful for that simple life!

egwene has a prophetic dream that tells her that something terrible could happen if she doesn’t find mesaana and stop her. i could’ve told you that without a prophetic dream jdfkg

saerin has a scar on her face whose origins she’s never been willing to explain. mesaana???

RAND IS AT THE TOWER TO SEE EGWENE!!!!!! REUNION TIME!!!!

apparently siuan has the Talent of seeing ta’veren? did we know that already? then why didn’t she make moiraine become amyrlin and go dragon reborn hunting herself if she can see ta’veren so easily?

upon finding out siuan bonded bryne as a warder, rand’s only response is “elayne will be interested to hear of that.” ❤️❤️

rand asks what kind of amyrlin egwene is: “‘she’s an incredible one,’ siuan said. ‘one of the greatest we’ve had, for all the fact that she’s only held the seat a short time.’ he smiled again. ‘i should have expected nothing less.’” ❤️❤️❤️

rand gets a mysterious sealed letter from an aes sedai named tiana. oh my god i bet it’s another one of the mysterious For Reeling In Ta’veren letters from verin like the one she gave mat!!! i can only conclude that rand’s instructions from verin will be “marry mat” just as mat’s will be “marry rand”

“‘rand,’ egwene said, softening her tone. ‘i’m going to have some sisters talk to you to determine if there is anything...wrong with you. please try to understand.’” egwene talks to rand for 10 seconds and immediately realizes he needs to see a mental health professional jkfg god bless her

“there didn’t seem to be madness in his eyes. she knew those eyes. she knew rand. light, she thought. i’m wrong. i can’t think of him only as the dragon reborn. i’m here for a reason. he’s here for a reason. to me, he must be rand. because rand can be trusted, while the dragon reborn must be feared.” ❤️❤️❤️

“she looked at him and remembered the youth that he had been. the earnest young man. not solemn like perrin, but not wild like mat. solid, straightforward. the type of man you could trust with anything. even the fate of the world.” ❤️❤️❤️

overall, the reunion was far more positive than i had feared! egwene’s recent empathy for and understanding of rand has carried through to seeing him again in person, and Jesus Rand was very calm and respectful of egwene’s authority and of being in her center of power. the only snag was that rand told her he’s going to break the seals and needs her help, and egwene understandably thinks that’s a horrible idea (especially since rand was just like “we’re gonna break the seals and replace them, but i have no idea how to do this. figure it out by next month. bye!” lmao no wonder egwene is skeptical). could be setting up for a larger clash later. but i’m excited at the prospect of male and female channelers fiiiiinally working together!! the dragon reborn and the amyrlin seat!! my foils and co-protagonists!! and oooh egwene knows how to make cuendillar so maybe she can make new seals for the prison when they clear away the old ones!

“‘[rand] might be persuaded [against breaking the seals] by people that he trusts.’ or he might be forced to change his mind if confronted by a large enough group united to stop him. it was now more vital that she speak with elayne and nynaeve.” bold of you to assume that the narrative will ever grant elayne 5 minutes to talk to rand, egwene 😔

“‘but the witches are evil!’ ‘perhaps,’ galad said. once, he might have denied that. but listening to the other Children, and considering what those at tar valon had done to his sister, was making him think he might be too soft on the aes sedai.” forget what i said about liking galad, he sucks actually. he had his day in the sun when he killed valda and then immediately squandered my affections.

“the questioners are at fault.” “part of the blame is theirs. but it is also because those who would do evil look with disgust and resentment upon those who stand for what is right.” oh, there i was thinking galad was about to admit that the non-questioner whitecloaks also share blame, but no, of course, it is the fault of evildoers who resent them for being so pure and good! once again, coming from my show-first impression of whitecloaks, it’s just sickening to read a “good” guy saying this shit about them and believing it wholeheartedly.

and he has THE NERVE to cite helpful lessons from morgase when he knows full well that the whitecloaks see her as a darkfriend!!!

“we follow no queen or king.” “yes, and that frightens monarchs. i grew up in the court of andor. i know how my mother regarded the Children.” i think. maybe. just a hypothesis. but MAYBE morgase hated the whitecloaks because they are dedicated to persecuting women like her and her daughter, not just because they don’t report to any monarch. JUST a THOUGHT here, galad.

“my mother was no darkfriend.” “excepting her, of course.” of course galad is not prejudiced against channelers! his mom is a channeler and he likes her, thank you very much! it’s just all the other ones who are darkfriends!

“and yet there was such a thing as being too zealous.” galad saying that about someone else, bitch look in a mirror!

can’t believe GAWYN is the hated trakand boy. his only crime is being kinda dumb! at least he never joined a religious extremist group and grew to genuinely believe all their bullshit! at least he only thinks aes sedai are annoying and untrustworthy, not straight up evil! fuck galad all my homies hate galad. i hope elayne and morgase beat his ass if/when they see him again.

thankfully, we now return to the superior trakand boy. he is investigating a string of murders in the white tower which egwene later reveals are most likely mesaana’s work. gawyn describes a man as handsome without adding “to women” to qualify it #BiGawynRights

the handsome man is the captain of the tower guard who seems hostile to gawyn in a way gawyn doesn’t understand, but then he figures out that the guy feels threatened that gawyn’s gunning for his job and so gawyn takes a moment to let him know, in a subtle way that won’t reveal gawyn’s noticed he’s insecure or anything, that all he wants is to be egwene’s warder. respectful king!

“gawyn forced himself to keep his temper. once, that hadn’t been nearly so hard.” rand parallels!

speaking of rand, “in his heart, gawyn wanted to meet al’thor with sword in hand and ram steel through him, dragon reborn or not.” [michael scott voice] that’s what she said. “al’thor would rip you apart with the one power, he told himself. you’re being foolish, gawyn trakand. his hatred of al’thor continued to smolder anyway.” smoooooolder. i want you all to know that gawyn is smoooooldering and unable to think straight on account of rand. gawyn wants his Homoerotic Duel with rand so bad and yet if/when they actually meet rand’s just gonna be like “aw hello brother-in-law!” and not care at all. funniest dynamic in the world.

i suppose i can see why people think the gawyn romance is a waste of egwene’s time and only hinders the Hot Girl Shit she’s trying to accomplish, but i for one enjoy it and find it very interesting! i like seeing a different side to our resident Career Woman, seeing how she struggles to balance her personal and professional lives. heart vs. duty is a theme i’m all about! i agree that not every character and particularly not every female character needs a love interest, but i also hate the modern-day fandom narrative (not necessarily WOT fandom, but in general) that Strong Female Characters™ are made less by having love interests. and like, it is so clearly gawyn who is egwene’s love interest and not the reverse jkfjg so that’s excellent. and also, after seeing how SOME characters in this series just roll over for their love interest and become an entirely different person to please them (sideeyes min and mat), it’s refreshing to see egwene and gawyn both refusing to compromise on who they are and what they want, even if it would make getting into a relationship with the other person easier. so much of this is exactly what we could and should have gotten with rand and elayne, with all their political clashes and sometimes-conflicting duties and burdens of leadership and issues of wearing one face in private and another in public (“the amyrlin cannot be served by those who refuse to see her authority” “but isn’t it important to have people who know you for yourself and not the title?”), so i’m glad to get it here since i was deprived of it for randlayne.

graendal is now hiding out in a dank cave. “everyone knew that graendal could not stand a lack of luxury. that was true. but the best part about being predictable was that it allowed you to do the unexpected.” once again i am saying that graendal is the stealth most competent and dangerous forsaken (except for moridin i guess). female characters who make everyone think they’re just dumb bimbos but are secretly incredibly cunning are my kryptonite! unfortunate for rand that he didn’t actually kill her, but story-wise i’m glad a bad bitch didn’t go down so easily and anticlimactically!

graendal talking about the Pain Of Soul that rand’s balefiring of the whole fortress will cause him: “semirhage had been corrupt to the bone from the start. but others of them had taken different paths to the shadow, including ishamael. she could see the memories, so distant, in moridin’s eyes...yes, he knew exactly what al’thor was feeling.” is this a crumb of Ishamael Tragic Backstory???? man i reeeaaaaaally hope the show does a lot more with forsaken backstories and actually shows us what they were like before they became evil, and especially their friendships with lews therin and the pain of that betrayal. i want my feelings to be hurt!

“it will break al’thor, ruin him, if he loses aybara.” aww even the shadow knows they’re besties 🥺

“during the first weeks following her silent abdication, she’d hoped to find a way to return to andor, so she could be a resource for elayne. however, the more she’d considered it, the more she’d realized that she had to stay away. everyone in andor had to assume that morgase was dead. each queen had to make her own way, and elayne might seem a puppet to her own mother if morgase returned. beyond that, morgase had made many enemies before leaving.” noooooo i need my full morgase-elayne-gawyn reunion!!!! (i have rescinded galad's invite to the family reunion, and he doesn’t deserve to be rand’s brother either)

it’s so heartbreaking that morgase still has no idea that gaebril was a forsaken and that she was under compulsion, and thinks just the same as everyone else that she only became a fool for a man

lan being followed by the other borderlanders nynaeve sent after him:

“trollocs in the two rivers?” it’s more likely than you think

we’re setting up to finally resolve perrin vs. the whitecloaks and i truly could not care less. oh, i should mention that perrin’s had quite a bit of pov so far and i just haven’t commented on it bc i have absolutely nothing to say about it jkfg i know some people love the wolf stuff but i was never into it, to me perrin’s wolves and whitecloaks plotlines are just about as boring as the faile kidnapping plotline.

number of women whom mat, in this one chapter alone, spends a paragraph describing how hot they are and then hastily reassuring us that he has no interest in them since he’s a married man now and claiming that he’s only checking them out in order to be a wingman for various friends who aren’t even with him at the moment: 4. he’s gonna cheat on tuon so fast it’s unreal, and good for him

“mat would have given her his best smile - there was not a woman he had met who did not melt for his best smile” not mat doing the exact same thing he complains that elayne allegedly always does! i love it

“he had sent word to [elayne] but had not gotten a reply. how was that for gratitude? by his count, he had saved her life twice. once should have been enough to reduce her to tears and kisses, but he had not seen even a peck on the cheek. not that he wanted one.” JSKDJFGK mat is SO desperate for kisses from elayne!! and so sulky that he has yet to receive any! don’t worry mat, she AND rand are very appreciative of you and will both give you so many kisses when you see them again.

“there was no avoiding royalty now! not for him. at least tuon was pretty. and good at playing stones. and very keen of wit, good for talking to” mat, have you considered: elayne is all of those things as well and also has the advantage of not being evil? also lmao at mat claiming tuon is good to talk to??? footage not found

“that siege was over now, and a new queen - the right queen - held the throne.” mat would have been elayne’s #1 supporter and her loyal captain-general i’m so mad!!

“for once, there had been a battle and he had missed it...an entire war had been fought over the lion throne, and not one arrow, blade, or spear had entered the conflict seeking matrim cauthon’s heart.” now you’re just rubbing it in that mat Should Have Been part of that plotline but wasn’t!

mat and thom are wondering who could possibly make them a gateway to the tower of ghenjei if verin doesn’t come back. elayne is right here! you know she can make gateways! tho of course at the current moment elayne hasn’t replied to mat’s letters and he’s fretting that she might never invite him to talk to her.

“for an aes sedai, i kind of like verin” awww mat!

“talking to [norry, who’d given the band permission to camp near caemlyn] meant elayne knew mat was here. she had to. but she had sent no greetings, no acknowledgment that she owed mat her skin.” mat is so desperate to see her!

“he had a slight fondness for teslyn, against his better judgment” “‘remember, should you ever come to the white tower, you do have women there who are in your debt, matrim cauthon. i do not forget.’ he took [teslyn’s] hand. it felt as bony as it looked, but it was warmer than he had expected. some aes sedai had ice running in their veins, that was for certain. but others were not so bad.” awww mat! and he offers her extra horses after having made a big stink about not giving the aes sedai extra horses in the last book! it’s a shame the aes sedai are leaving just when mat’s attitude towards them has become bearable lmao

and teslyn weaves air to fly mat out of the gholam’s reach (he’d taken off his medallion to try hitting the gholam with it) and he’s not even That scared about being touched by the power!

the gholam: [threatens to kill tuon] me: oh my god PLEASE do

mat mourns and feels guilty for the band members who died because the gholam was trying to get to him, and they aren’t even women!

“[one of joline’s warders] always seemed to be looking for someone to murder; each conversation with him was an interview to see if you fit the criteria.” LMAO sanderson’s mat does come up with the best descriptions of people

“are you going to swear at [elayne] too?” “of course i am. how else is she going to trust that [the letter] is really from me?” true love ❤️❤️

perrin’s asha’man are learning how to link with aes sedai. “grady had mentioned that creating a circle this way seemed to require the men to gain control over the women.” of course it does 🙄 why? literally give me one good reason why saidin-saidar circles would only work with a man in control.

“‘my lord, the taint is gone. i’m not going to go mad. that means...well, i always had a reason to fight. but now i’ve got a reason to live, too.’ looking into the man’s eyes, perrin understood. what must it have been like? knowing that you’d eventually go mad and need to be executed. likely by your friends, who would call it a mercy. that was what perrin had sensed in the asha’man all along, the reason they held themselves apart, often seeming so somber. everyone else fought for life. the asha’man...they’d fought to die. that’s how rand feels, perrin thought.” 😭😭😭 once again i am saying No, You’re Wrong, Non-Min-And-Nynaeve Characters Do Care About Rand Actually, They Just Aren’t Allowed To Spend Time With Him

“bornhald looked at him. ‘it is you. the light has delivered you to us.’ ‘unless it has also delivered you an army three or four times the size of the one you have now,’ perrin called, ‘then i doubt very much that it will matter.’” JSKDFJ perrin’s best clapback to date

perrin, upon seeing galad, who makes every single person who’s ever laid eyes on him swoon, whom mat straight up said was as pretty as a girl: “most women would probably call him handsome.” PROBABLY. perrin really is the most heterosexual character in the book hjdkfg

yes i know mat calling galad as pretty as a girl (this was back in tdr) was meant as a sexist insult and not mat thinking galad was as attractive to him as a girl would be..............but was it really though?

ELAYNE!!!!! RETURN OF THE QUEEN!!!!! RECALLED AS SHOUTING THANK GOD IT IS MY WIFE!!!!!!

talking about the imprisoned nobles who opposed elayne: “‘you could execute them,’ birgitte said. they both [elayne and dyelin] stared at her. ‘what?’ birgitte said.” birgitte: do you want me to kill that guy for you? because it sounds like he sucks and i will totally kill that guy for you

elayne is going to move on the sun throne! she explains later in the chapter that she’s worried about rand creating an empire and a successor coming up to claim it and keep it whole should he die in the last battle, in which case andor would be surrounded by the seanchan empire + rand’s successor’s empire + the borderlanders, hence elayne wants to hold cairhien herself to prevent this sort of Dragon Empire from happening. these are the kind of things that would be FASCINATING conflicts to see in rand and elayne’s personal relationship and yet we are completely deprived! why the fuck don’t we EVER get to see the two of them dealing with stuff like this? such a waste.

“in one step i could become one of the most powerful monarchs since artur hawkwing.” Good For Her!

“‘if someone is going to go out of her way to insult me, then i at least want to be aware of it. if only so that i know whom to behead later on.’ norry paled. ‘figuratively, master norry.’” jkdjfjg i love her. also, the norry-mistress harfor-essande holy trinity have gotta be my favorite tertiary characters i’d say (lini too, but i feel like she’s a slight step above tertiary, tho not quite secondary)

elayne receives mat’s letter!!! the letter is another example of “sure it’s a dumbing down of rj’s mat but it’s hilarious so i don’t care” and also it confirms that mat thinks elayne has a great ass which he “hardly ever spent any time looking at” and this is the most important piece of canon information i have ever received. then birgitte tells us that mat also has a great ass, which is the second most important piece of canon information i have ever received.

hi i’m mat i’m 19 and i never learned how to fucking read. lmao no but show!mat especially i COULD totally buy not being good at spelling words. show!mat i could buy not knowing how to read or write at all, there are definitely not any books in the show!cauthon household! book!mat however did previously write a perfectly good note to elayne in acos so inconsistency yes yes on the other hand that note iirc WAS transcribed in his own pov so maybe he just thought he was spelling everything right. also, i think it would be great if mat gained like beautiful formal old tongue writing ability with his past memories but still just does not fucking know how to spell anything in his own language dkfjg

anyway, elayne’s reaction to the letter and learning that mat escaped ebou dar and is ok and is now in andor: “so many emotions and questions welled up in her. birgitte stood upright, frowning, feeling the emotions. ‘elayne? what is it? did the man insult you?’ elayne found herself nodding, tears forming in her eyes. birgitte cursed, striding over. master norry looked taken aback, as if regretting that he’d brought the letter. elayne burst into laughter.” 😭😭😭❤️❤️❤️ SHE IS SO EMOTIONAL AND SO HAPPY she loves mat so much!!!!!

elayne is arranging a meeting with mat!!! matlayne reunion is imminent!!!!

“mat is...a particularly dynamic individual. he can be very useful when properly harnessed. when he is not - which is most of the time - he can be an outright disaster.” jdkjfg elayne knows her man

elayne is thinking about how useful mat and the band will be to her and hoping to use them to take cairhien! this is exactly what i’ve been fucking saying! he should’ve been here all along!!

“elayne loved [rand]. but she didn’t intend to see andor become merely another part of the dragon’s empire.” “the woman in her cringed to think of planning for rand’s death, but the queen could not be so squeamish. the world was changing.” 👏👏👏 and again, so similar to egwene’s heart vs. duty conflicts with gawyn but elayne is never given the opportunity to actually explore these WITH rand. because for some godforsaken rand was stuck with the one girlfriend who offers him nothing interesting narratively speaking.

speaking of, we go from elayne to TWO (2) chapters IN A ROW of min pov which is a crime against me. but i know rand’s plotline is small in this book and i assume min won’t do shit at the last battle, so hopefully i won’t have to put up with her too much for the rest of the series.

nynaeve: “i knew rand al’thor, and the boy still inside him. the man he’s become frightens me. i always told him he needed to grow up. and then...and then he did.” 😭😭

alanna has vanished after receiving a note with a red seal. another of verin’s little mystery scavenger hunt notes she’s just been sending out all over the continent?? maybe this one said that alanna has to attend the cauthor wedding that verin is setting up so she hastened off to the venue verin gave in the letter.

“min had long ago tossed aside all sense of decorum for her towering sheepherder.” yeah i fucking know min. also, i kept forgetting to say this before, i’m so annoyed that sheepherder became min’s thing for rand because it was originally LAN’S thing! how dare you stand where he stood etc.

“it let her see a part of him that others were never allowed.” not like he has 2 other allegedly equal partners or anything, min. elayne and avi think about each other’s relationship with rand frequently and sometimes min’s as well, but in her own pov min truly does not EVER think about elayne and avi or acknowledge that they’re part of the relationship unless they are standing right in front of her forcing her to acknowledge it. she really does see herself as rand’s one Real partner.

rand fiiiiiiiinally seems like he’s actually going to treat the maidens as capable warriors and let them fight for him and tell them when he’s planning to go somewhere and let them come with him if they wish! this SHOULD have happened after sulin’s awesome speech to him back in book fucking 5, but better late than never i suppose

“i do think you need some new insults, however. the ones you use are wearing out like last year’s lace.” hksjhdkfjg Jesus Rand is so bitchy, love that for him.

rand needs min to figure out callandor. is this going to become min’s second (2nd) contribution in 14 800-page books? (with the first being helping siuan escape) also like. why is she qualified to be the person figuring this out. she doesn’t know shit about channeling or ter’angreal! elayne should be doing this!

rand pardons cadsuane. cadsuane says “i trust you see the error in your deed. it strikes me as unsuitable that i should need ‘forgiveness’ or a ‘pardon’ in the first place.” so clearly she has learned absolutely nothing and not changed in any way. what was the POINT of her??? is The Thing she taught rand just that she brought tam to him which led to him learning to laugh and cry again? anyone could’ve done that! literally anyone! tho i SUPPOSE rand wouldn’t have gotten paranoid and tried to attack tam if he hadn’t been sent by someone rand was so mistrustful of. so then cadsuane’s purpose was to be so fucking bad at mentoring rand that she made him mistrust her enough to attack his own father upon hearing he talked to her lmao

“[the nobles] looked oddly out of place in the stone’s courtyard, where everyone else had a purpose.” okay i KNOW min did NOT just shit on OTHER PEOPLE for being useless 💀💀

“she’d never been fond of those who thought themselves more important than everyone else.” hey sorry was it not just last book when you were thinking about how you were the most important person in rand’s life because you’re The Only One Who Knows Him And Sees Him? and how you’re superior in this regard to his close friend who has known him since he was born? and are you not constantly acting like you’re rand’s one “real” partner despite being in a poly relationship?

weiramon is a darkfriend???? shit!!!! never saw THAT coming! after all the times rand was bitchy about how stupid he is jdkfjgh

we just saw tam in ghealdan with perrin but now he’s in tear with rand. i get that the timelines of the 2 plotlines aren’t synced up (perrin, mat, and elayne are still in TGS time) so it’s not confusing or anything to keep track of that, it’s just weird lmao. but i don’t know what else sanderson could’ve done - clearly there was way too much remaining material to allow for wrapping rand’s, egwene’s, perrin’s, and mat’s pre-last-battle-plotlines all up in a single book, but if he’d told all 4 plotlines concurrently across 2 books then TGS would’ve just ended halfway thru 4 different plotlines with no real resolution to anything, which would’ve been lame (i mean. not that rj didn’t do that frequently jkfjg)

“rand - who had faced forsaken without a tremor - was afraid of his father. rand took the last few steps in two sudden strides and grabbed tam in an embrace. he stood one step down, which brought them near an equal height. in fact, in that posture, tam almost seemed a giant, and rand but a child who was clinging to him. there, holding to his father, the dragon reborn began to weep. ... ‘i’m sorry father,’ he whispered. ‘i’m so sorry.’ ‘it’s all right, son. it’s all right.’ ‘i’ve done so much that is terrible.’ ‘nobody walks a difficult path without stumbling now and again. it didn’t break you when you fell. that’s the important part.’ rand nodded. they held each other for a time.” 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

absolute crime that that moment was from min’s pov instead of rand’s

and now rand introduces min to tam as someone who is very special to him. what do you want to fucking bet that rand is never going to even mention to tam that he has 2 other girlfriends and that neither elayne nor avi are ever going to get to meet tam and that he’s never going to have any idea that their babies are his grandchildren 🙄😤

in the tel’aran’rhiod hall of the tower: “there, set into the glass below the flame of tar valon, was a large segment in the shape of the dragon’s fang. that wasn’t part of the original window...did this window represent one of those, another world where dragon and amyrlin ruled tar valon side by side?” it’s about yin and yang it’s about balance it’s about two sides of one coin it’s about two parts of one whole!!!! it’s about rand and egwene being foils and co-protagonists!! earlier during the linking scene the asha’man said that he felt Whole while channeling both saidin and saidar together.........there was that thing rand heard about “the two must become one”..............what if the endgame will be the one power becoming whole instead of split into saidin and saidar, and everybody can channel both uniformly??? like how the true power isn’t divided. rj did love his gender essentialism so i’m skeptical that this will Really happen, but i wish it would!

egwene tells nynaeve that the seanchan attacked the tower and nynaeve just. does not ask for any details or have any followup questions lmao

awww egwene asks nynaeve for advice on how to handle being in a position of authority as a very young person whom people don’t respect as a superior, since nynaeve was in that situation as wisdom ❤️❤️ full circle moment! and through this conversation the two of them are finally able to reach an understanding about egwene outranking nynaeve, a role reversal they’ve both been struggling to handle ever since book 2. we love to see it!

elayne arrives too and i finally have my full wondergirl reunion!!!!! “you did it, egwene! we’re whole again!” a line later i realized elayne was talking about the tower being whole again, but my first and preferred interpretation was the wondergirls being whole again 😭😭❤️❤️

they make chairs to sit on and elayne makes herself a throne dkfjg i love her your honor. and egwene sits in the amyrlin seat but nynaeve just a regular chair: “nynaeve looked from one throne to another, obviously dissatisfied. maybe that was why she’d resisted these meetings for so long; egwene and elayne had risen so far.” aww baby! it’s okay you’re the queen of malkier now actually!

elayne about rand: “he’s awakened. he’s warm now.” ❤️❤️ then she tries to brush the words off as just some dumb thing that popped out, but egwene’s already been suspecting for a while that she’d bonded him and this just confirms it. “why didn’t she wish to speak of it?” because what would have been a very nice randlayne solo bond turned into an illegal 3-way bond that elayne did all the work for so that min could reap all the rewards 😤

nynaeve finally finds out elayne is pregnant! if she sees rand again this book and neglects to tell him i will call sooooo much bullshit! god it would’ve been SO easy to just throw in a line of elayne saying “don’t tell rand, i want to tell him myself” or something so that it could justify why So Many people know of elayne’s pregnancy and are in a position to tell rand but just have not done so lmao

“light! i didn’t think i’d let rand out of my sight long enough for that. when did it happen?” nynaeve did you forget the time in caemlyn when elayne whisked him away to ~speak privately~ and you didn’t see him again for many hours

“nynaeve generally did see the right way things needed to be done, so long as that right way didn’t involve her being wrong.” jdkfjg my beloved

elayne continues to get out of swearing the three oaths by saying what if it’s dangerous to do while pregnant lmao good for her

so much love for nynaeve repeatedly saying that rand will be completely unattended (but for cadsuane) if she leaves him. i know she’s only referring to aes-sedai-interests-wise, but also, i’m choosing to interpret that min doesn’t count for shit in her mind. as it should be!

not nynaeve slamming elayne for spending the last few months “mooning about and dreaming of rand al’thor” when elayne is the only goddamn person (besides egwene) who has done ANYTHING for the past several books, and NYNAEVE is the one who’s had no plotline but fussing over rand since like book 7! nynaeve really was sidelined beyond belief in the second half of the series after being one of the strongest players in the first half.

update: nynaeve just figured out how to Heal madness!!! she is back in the game! “i can’t let myself begin to think that nothing i do matters. that’s what the dark one wants.” ❤️

nynaeve has a convo with rand and does NOT tell him that elayne’s pregnant SMH!!!! maaaaaaybe she assumes he already knows? or maybe we’re meant to assume that offscreen elayne did ask her not to tell him? or, good god, are we meant to believe that nynaeve is actually trying to mind her own business for once? but fuck man i should not have to do these mental gymnastics to justify somebody neglecting to tell her best friend that his long-distance girlfriend whom he hasn’t seen in months and may never see again, and who is also her best friend, is pregnant. i mean, this is nynaeve! rand AND elayne both trust her implicitly! if anybody was going to play messenger about the pregnancy it should be her!

anyway, rand tells nynaeve about how she shouldn’t let the white tower “ruin” her because she’s Better than all of them due to having visible emotions, which i’ve seen quoted often as an empowering quote for nynaeve or as a nice tribute to her and rand’s relationship, but tbh i find the whole thing fairly condescending and irritating. i wouldn’t want nynaeve to change either but there’s no need to pull a Not Like Other Girls Aes Sedai about it. just because people care differently than you do or don’t emote visibly doesn’t mean that they don’t care at ALL, rand! “moiraine cared. you could see it in her, even when she was calm.” i mean yeah and you only got to realizing that about her after knowing her very well for a very long time. have you considered that the “emotionless” aes sedai you’ve only met in passing are actually the same way and you just don’t know them very well?

maybe i chugged TOO much White Tower Propaganda Juice during egwene’s plotline last book jkfjgh but this passage just got my goat!

rand says that the two women he’ll use callandor with will be definitely nynaeve, and then PERHAPS aviendha or elayne. PER FUCKING HAPS!!! they are, allegedly, rand’s committed partners to whom he is PSYCHICALLY BONDED and he can literally feel all their emotions, yet he only PERHAPS considers them among his most trusted saidar users????? you fucking know that if min could channel he would’ve listed her as a shoe-in. I HATE IT HERE!!!! it’s so true that the bonding changed absolutely nothing about rand’s behavior or mindset. like, you would THINK that the average warder would consider his aes sedai his #1 most trusted saidar user!

narratively speaking i would love it if the other woman ended up being egwene and we got her, rand, and nynaeve all doing the callandor thingy together, but idk how likely that is

nynaeve describes rand’s madness as “thousands upon thousands of the tiny black thorns pricked into his brain, but beneath them was a brilliant white lacing of something. a white radiance, like liquid power. light given form and life.” interesting. so he WAS really going saidin-mad for real (not just normal trauma reactions) but the epiphany put a bandaid on it? how? what does it mean? what does it all mean? maybe we will find out more later, but for now my mood is “not to be a lazy reader who expects to have all the information handed to me but considering how hugely important rand’s whole mental health situation is to the story, i wish it would be explained a little better and more clearly” lmao

“i will need to send someone [to the black tower]” oh my god no SHIT rand jkfjgh they’ve been running rampant and unsupervised for 7 books despite NUMEROUS warnings you’ve received about how bad the situation is getting!

egwene discusses mesaana with some of the black ajah hunters, two of whom (saerin and seaine) are on my Mesaana Disguise Suspicion List i think, tho frankly i can never keep track of all the minor aes sedai so who knows. i hope it’s saerin so that “‘from what i’ve been able to learn about her,’ saerin said, ‘mesaana was good at preparation. she excelled at it.’” will turn out to be the meme of obama giving himself a medal jdkfjg saerin DOES seem to know an awful lot about mesaana’s personality and motivations despite claiming she could only find “tales, rumors, and whispers”.................

i appreciate that faile (like many characters) shows growth and self-awareness and regret/embarrassment over her past behavior under sanderson’s pen, but i feel like she’s doing that FAR more than any of the other characters and it’s starting to feel like the author breaking the fourth wall and being like “i know faile was the series’ most despised character up to this point and i’m trying so hard to fix that” which is annoying because, while she certainly had her bad moments, i still loved her and felt the fandom hatred of her WAY overblown and unfair.

“what would the two rivers folk do if he stepped down as their lord?” go back to the way things were when they were just fine without a lord for many generations, probably. i mean i get that they need a stronger government system now that there’s been a population boom with so many people coming to live there from other regions, but couldn’t they just invent a beefed up version of the women’s circle and village council or something instead of going straight to feudalism?

faile gives us some saldaean marriage culture information (the shanna’har anniversary celebration) and also shares the anniversary-esque tradition that tam told her he used to do with his wife (once a year they packed a picnic and hiked to a new place in the woods and spent the day there together 😭) and i am thriving!! different cultures’ marriage/romance traditions my beloved!!

“how can i feast while my people are being held under threat of execution and while the world itself may die?” “if the world itself is going to die, is this not the time when a man must take time to appreciate what he has? before it is all taken?” faile could’ve done wonders for rand earlier if she’d been around to give him this outlook damn

and then they communicate! they confide in each other! share the secrets and insecurities they’ve been silently worrying about this whole time! “each word spoken made him relax more...in telling her of his struggles, he felt some of his burden lift.” ❤️❤️❤️ WE LOVE TO SEE IT my god how did perrin and faile become the most healthy canon couple jkfjg i guess with the competition being the likes of rand/min and mat/tuon the bar is on the fucking floor. even lan and nynaeve are dishonest with each other more often than not tbh and gawyn and egwene are currently Going Through It (tho they ARE attempting to communicate and just still disagreeing, so points to them for that) and of course rand/elayne and rand/avi don’t ever fuckin see each other so they’re disqualified from even competing here.

“those brotherless had been with the shaido, and they had attacked and killed men under perrin’s protection. no act of kindness would redeem that. they deserved their deaths. that gave him pause. the whitecloaks probably said very similar things about him. but the whitecloaks had attacked first.” FUCKING THANK YOU this one goes out to that one anon who was trying to argue that perrin and hopper were in the wrong for attacking the ~innocent and harmless~ whitecloaks back in eotw. the whitecloaks attacked first!

“‘you, husband, always seem uncomfortable when we yell. i’m very glad you’ve begun to stand up for yourself, as is proper. but i have asked much from you to adapt to my ways. i thought, tonight, i would try to adapt to yours.’ those were words that he had never expected to hear from faile. it seemed the most personal thing she could ever have given him. embarrassingly, he felt tears in his eyes, and he pulled her tight.” ❤️❤️❤️❤️

#wot #wot book spoilers

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