#which leads to checking/reassuring compulsions
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Thinking about the comment one of the members of my college friend group said a few years ago about how I'm always trying to explain and get to the root of things, and I immediately tried to discern why I do that because I never noticed, and she said "See?"
It kinda felt shameful to me, to be exposed like that. Idk I still feel bad when I remember cause it's like she noticed my patterns and I'm weird and if she noticed then so did everyone else.
#you're not gonna guess what the reason i do this was#exactly... OCD#at least i think so because i need to know why everything happens or what the answer is to everything#which leads to checking/reassuring compulsions#so anyway yeah I'm weird confirmed and everyone knows this#honestly she should've shut up if she knew what manners were#she's always given me weird vibes. like she's a soft bully#idk I've hung out with her sometimes but I wouldn't say we're really friends#i hate what she said because now when i notice I'm doing that i get reminded of that moment and feel not normal
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Understanding Magical Thinking OCD: A Deep Dive into Scrupulosity, Religious, and Moral OCD

Magical Thinking OCD also known as scrupulosity OCD, religious OCD, or moral OCD, is a subtype of obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) that revolves around irrational beliefs and fears related to morality, religion, or superstition. Individuals with this form of OCD may experience intrusive thoughts that their actions or thoughts could lead to catastrophic consequences, such as harming themselves or others, or violating religious or moral principles. These thoughts are often accompanied by rituals or compulsions performed to neutralize the perceived threat or prevent harm, which can significantly impair daily functioning and quality of life.
Scrupulosity OCD is characterized by excessive concern with moral or religious issues, leading to intrusive thoughts about sin, blasphemy, or moral wrongdoing. These individuals may feel compelled to confess their perceived sins repeatedly or engage in rituals to seek forgiveness or avoid punishment. For example, someone with scrupulosity OCD may fear that not praying a certain number of times or in a specific way will lead to harm coming to themselves or their loved ones.
Religious OCD, on the other hand, focuses specifically on religious beliefs and practices. Individuals with this form of OCD may obsess over whether they have committed a religious offense or fear that their actions will lead to divine punishment. They may engage in rituals such as excessive prayer, avoidance of religious symbols, or seeking reassurance from religious figures to alleviate their anxiety.
Moral OCD, sometimes referred to as just right OCD, involves obsessive thoughts about morality and ethics. These individuals may be preoccupied with the idea of right and wrong, often fearing that their actions will lead to harm or moral corruption. They may engage in rituals such as repeatedly checking their actions, seeking reassurance from others, or mentally reviewing past events to ensure they have not done anything wrong.
Treatment for Magical Thinking OCD typically involves a combination of cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) and medication. CBT helps individuals challenge and change their irrational beliefs and behaviors, while medication, such as selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs), can help alleviate symptoms of anxiety and depression associated with OCD.
It is important for individuals with Magical Thinking OCD to seek help from a mental health professional experienced in treating OCD. With proper treatment and support, individuals with this condition can learn to manage their symptoms and improve their quality of life.
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Understanding OCD: Exploring the Various Subtypes
This is a continuation/part 2 of the original post under the same title "Understanding OCD."
Overview
The symptoms of OCD manifest differently across individuals. Experts, including clinicians and researchers, propose that OCD can be categorized into distinct types based on the symptomatic patterns observed. This categorization has led to the identification of various subtypes.
The 5 Main Subtypes
Contamination Obsessions with Washing/Cleaning Compulsions typically involve a significant preoccupation with contamination fears, driving individuals to engage in excessive washing or cleaning in an attempt to alleviate distress.
Harm Obsessions with Checking Compulsions are characterized by severe thoughts of potential self-harm or harm to others. People may adopt checking rituals as a means to mitigate these anxieties. For instance, the fear of a house fire might lead one to repeatedly drive by their home for reassurance, or the belief that merely thinking about a catastrophic event could make it happen.
Obsessions without Visible Compulsions typically involve experiencing persistent, unwelcome thoughts of a sexual, religious, or aggressive nature. To cope with the anxiety these thoughts induce, mental rituals, such as repeating specific words, counting, or praying mentally, are often performed. A common avoidance strategy is steering clear of anything that triggers these thoughts, such as the intrusive fear of committing assault.
Symmetry Obsessions with Ordering, Arranging, and Counting Compulsions involve an overpowering need to order and reorder objects until they feel "just right." This may extend to repetitive thoughts or utterances until a task is completed to perfection. These activities can be motivated by the belief that they will prevent harm.
Hoarding is now identified as a separate condition within the Obsessive-Compulsive and Related Disorders category, as per the DSM-5-TR. It is marked by obsessive fears of losing items that may be needed in the future, as well as excessive attachment to objects, which often leads to significant distress and can impair employment stability. Unlike other OCD subtypes, compulsive hoarding can manifest without other OCD characteristics.
Additional Subtypes Not Officially Recognized in the DSM
There exist a variety of subtypes that, although not formally acknowledged within the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM), have been identified and discussed by mental health professionals and researchers. These subtypes are not officially classified within the DSM due to varying reasons, including insufficient empirical evidence or the need for further study. This exploration into unlisted subtypes underscores the complexity of diagnosing and treating mental health issues, highlighting the ongoing need for research and more inclusive diagnostic tools that can adapt to the nuanced nature of psychological well-being.
Relationship OCD involves individuals experiencing obsessive and compulsive thoughts concerning their romantic relationships. This form of OCD is characterized by severe fears and doubts about the solidity of their relationship, including worries over whether their partner truly loves them, an excessive concern for their partner's happiness, or persistent questioning of whether their partner might find someone more suited to them.
"Just Right" OCD is identified by the persistent feeling that certain things are not positioned or done 'just right.' Individuals with this subtype may engage in compulsive behaviors, such as counting, straightening, touching, tapping, or lining items up in a specific order to alleviate these feelings.
False Memory OCD entails individuals frequently battling doubting thoughts. For example, they might be plagued by worries over actions they may have inadvertently taken in the past, such as fretting over whether they accidentally stole something or forgot to pay for an item at a store.
Magical Thinking OCD manifests as a belief in the cause-and-effect relationship between certain behaviors and completely unrelated outcomes. An individual might, for instance, believe that something terrible will befall a loved one if they do not perform a specific action, like checking their phone at 8:15 PM every night, even though there is no logical connection between the two events.
These various forms of OCD highlight the complexity of obsessive-compulsive disorders, showcasing that its manifestations can extend far beyond the more commonly recognized symptoms and behaviors.
Disclaimer:
This content is based on DSM-5 research and insights. Although I am a certified/licensed Registered Behavior Technician (RBT) and can offer insights into mental disorders, remember this information is educational only and not a substitute for professional advice. If you or someone you know shows symptoms of a mental illness, consult a qualified healthcare professional for an accurate assessment and tailored treatment. Always prioritize your mental health and seek support from professionals. Remember, help is available, and you're not alone.
#mental health#psychology#psychopatois.tumblr.com#behavioral health#counseling#mental illness#advice blog#OCD#OCD subtypes
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How to Understand the OCD Thought Process
People with obsessive-compulsive disorder have intrusive thoughts (or images) that bother them, leading to a cycle of behaviors.
The cycle of OCD begins with a trigger, which eventually lead to negative thoughts, compulsive actions, and avoidance.
1. Triggers: These are the events or stimuli that set you off. It could be touching something (contamination), leaving the house (something is unlocked, the gas is on), driving at night (I ran over something), thinking of sex (God will punish me, I will lose control).
2. Odd thoughts or images: You have some thoughts or sensations that you don’t like. “Why am I having those bizarre, sick, disgusting, unwanted thoughts?”
3. Negative evaluation of thoughts: You think there is something wrong with your thinking – as if you should have only pure and good thoughts and feelings. You have a lot of “shoulds” about the way you should think and feel. You think that now that you have the thought, you have a responsibility to get reassurance, get control, or get rid of it. Having the thought is equivalent to being SENT ON A MISSION. You have become THE THOUGHT POLICE.
4. Self-monitoring: You watch yourself like a hawk, looking for those thoughts. Of course, simply because you have to think about what you are looking for (“I am looking for that disgusting and dangerous thought”), you always have to find it. It’s like holding up a mirror to yourself and saying, “I am looking for a mirror. OH MY GOD! THERE IT IS!!!!”
5. Demand for certainty: You think you should know for sure whether you will act out, lose control, or are contaminated. Nothing short of perfection and certainty will suffice.
6. Thought-action fusion: You equate having a thought with committing an action. “If I think I will get violent, I will.” Or, a thought is the same thing as reality. “If I think I have cancer, then I must be a dead man.” Thoughts, actions and reality are all one – all in your mind.
7. Thought-suppression: Your first line of “defense” is to try to stop having these thoughts. You tell yourself, “Don’t think that.” It works … for three minutes. But your failure to permanently suppress these thoughts leads you to believe…
8. “I’ve lost control”: You now equate control in your life to eliminating unwanted thoughts. Now you feel more out of control as you desperately try to control your thoughts more and more. It’s like slapping the water and drowning.
9. Compulsions: You now perform some neutralizing ritual. Perhaps you wash your hands excessively, pray, repeat “No,” walk a certain way, wash a certain way, arrange things, go back and check, check again…. You find yourself frenetically doing these things until you have a…
10. Felt sense of completion: You say, “I can stop now because I feel I have done enough.” This felt sense of completion now becomes your new rulebook for rituals. “I need to do them until I feel I did enough.” You are hooked on your rituals.
11. Avoidance of triggers. You remind yourself, I wouldn’t have any of these thoughts if I simply avoided the triggers. So you avoid touching things, avoid public restrooms, avoid shaking hands, avoid movies with Satan, avoid people that make you have feelings that are bad, and disgusting feelings. Avoid, avoid and avoid. You are running away from the world.
Excerpted from: https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/anxiety-files/200906/how-do-obsessive-compulsive-people-think
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The Importance of Seeing a Therapist for OCD Patients
Obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) is a serious mental health condition that affects thousands of Australians. It is characterised by persistent, intrusive thoughts (obsessions) and repetitive behaviours or mental acts (compulsions) aimed at reducing anxiety. Without proper treatment, OCD can interfere with daily life, relationships, and overall well-being. Seeking help from a mental health therapist Melbourne is crucial in managing OCD effectively. This article explores why OCD patients should visit a therapist and how professional intervention can improve their quality of life.
Understanding OCD and Its Impact
OCD is more than just a preference for cleanliness or order—it is a debilitating disorder that can cause severe distress. Common symptoms include:
Fear of contamination leading to excessive hand washing
Repeatedly checking locks, appliances, or switches
Intrusive, distressing thoughts that create intense anxiety
An overwhelming need for symmetry or exactness
Left untreated, these symptoms can lead to significant emotional and social struggles. This is why consulting an OCD specialist Melbourne is essential to help patients gain control over their symptoms.
Benefits of Visiting a Mental Health Therapist
Seeking help from a mental health therapist Melbourne can offer numerous benefits for OCD patients. Therapy provides structured techniques to manage compulsions and obsessive thoughts effectively. Some of the key benefits include:
1. Personalised Treatment Plans
Every OCD case is unique, and a therapist can tailor a treatment plan based on individual symptoms and needs. Techniques such as Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) and Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP) are commonly used to help patients gradually face their fears and reduce compulsive behaviours.
2. Emotional Support and Coping Strategies
OCD can take a significant emotional toll on individuals and their families. A therapist offers a safe space to discuss fears and anxieties, providing reassurance and guidance. Patients learn healthier coping mechanisms, helping them manage stress more effectively.
3. Preventing Worsening Symptoms
OCD symptoms can intensify over time if left untreated. Without intervention, compulsions can become more time-consuming and disruptive. Early treatment from an OCD specialist Melbourne can prevent the disorder from worsening, allowing individuals to regain control of their lives.
4. Medication Guidance and Management
In some cases, medication may be required to manage OCD symptoms. A therapist can work alongside psychiatrists to determine whether medication is necessary and monitor its effectiveness over time.
Why Melbourne Residents Should Seek Local Expertise
Finding the right therapist is crucial for effective treatment. A mental health therapist Melbourne understands the specific challenges faced by local patients and can provide culturally relevant support. Melbourne is home to numerous qualified professionals who specialise in OCD treatment, offering a range of therapy options to suit different needs.
Similarly, an OCD specialist Melbourne has in-depth knowledge of the disorder and can provide targeted treatment strategies. By seeking local help, patients have better access to in-person therapy, support groups, and community resources, all of which contribute to a successful recovery journey.
Taking the First Step Toward Recovery
OCD is a challenging condition, but with the right professional support, it can be managed effectively. If you or someone you know is struggling with OCD, consulting a mental health therapist Melbourne is the first step toward a better life. Therapy provides essential tools to overcome compulsions, reduce anxiety, and improve overall well-being.
Don’t let OCD control your life—seek help from an OCD specialist Melbourne today and take charge of your mental health.
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Understanding Anxiety: Insights from Dr. Karen Hawk, Psychologist in Phoenix
What is Anxiety?
Anxiety is a natural response to stress, but when it becomes excessive or persistent, it can interfere with daily life. It often involves feelings of worry, fear, or unease and can manifest in both physical and emotional ways. While some anxiety is normal and even beneficial—helping us stay alert in dangerous situations—chronic anxiety can negatively impact mental and physical health.
Dr. Karen Hawk, a psychologist in Phoenix, specializes in helping individuals understand and manage anxiety. Her approach focuses on identifying the root causes of anxiety, teaching effective coping strategies, and fostering long-term emotional resilience.
Common Symptoms of Anxiety
Anxiety can show up in a variety of ways, and symptoms can differ from person to person. Some of the most common signs include:
Excessive worry, even about minor things
Restlessness or feeling on edge
Difficulty concentrating or feeling like the mind is “going blank”
Rapid heartbeat, shortness of breath, or dizziness
Muscle tension or headaches
Trouble sleeping, including insomnia or frequent nightmares
Avoidance of situations that trigger anxiety
For some, anxiety is a temporary response to stress, while for others, it becomes a long-term condition that requires professional support.
Types of Anxiety Disorders
Anxiety is not a one-size-fits-all experience. Different types of anxiety disorders affect individuals in distinct ways. Dr Karen Hawk Psychologist Phoenix helps her clients recognize which type they may be dealing with, including:
Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD)
People with GAD experience persistent and excessive worry about various aspects of life, such as work, relationships, or health. The worry often feels uncontrollable and can last for months or even years.
Panic Disorder
Panic disorder is characterized by sudden episodes of intense fear, known as panic attacks. These attacks can include physical symptoms such as heart palpitations, sweating, and difficulty breathing. Many people who experience panic attacks worry about when the next one will occur, which can increase anxiety.
Social Anxiety Disorder
This disorder involves extreme fear of social situations, often due to concerns about being judged, embarrassed, or humiliated. It can make everyday interactions, such as speaking in public or meeting new people, overwhelming.
Phobias
Phobias are intense fears of specific objects or situations, such as heights, flying, or certain animals. Unlike general anxiety, phobias trigger an immediate and intense fear response.
Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD)
OCD involves unwanted, intrusive thoughts (obsessions) that cause distress, leading to repetitive behaviors (compulsions) to reduce the anxiety. These rituals, such as excessive handwashing or checking things repeatedly, can interfere with daily life.
Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD)
PTSD can develop after experiencing or witnessing a traumatic event. Symptoms may include flashbacks, nightmares, and heightened anxiety, often making it difficult to feel safe or function normally.
The Impact of Anxiety on Daily Life
Chronic anxiety can affect many aspects of life, including relationships, work performance, and overall well-being. It can lead to social withdrawal, decreased productivity, and even physical health issues such as high blood pressure and digestive problems.
Anxiety doesn’t just affect the mind—it influences behaviors and emotions. Many individuals develop coping mechanisms that provide temporary relief but ultimately reinforce anxiety, such as avoidance or excessive reassurance-seeking. Recognizing these patterns is the first step toward breaking the cycle Dr Karen Hawk Psychologist.
How Dr. Karen Hawk Helps Clients Manage Anxiety
Dr. Hawk takes a compassionate and evidence-based approach to treating anxiety. She works with clients to develop personalized treatment plans that may include:
Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy (CBT)
CBT is one of the most effective therapies for anxiety. It helps individuals identify and change negative thought patterns that contribute to anxious feelings. By challenging irrational fears and replacing them with more balanced thinking, clients gain better control over their anxiety.
Mindfulness and Relaxation Techniques
Dr Karen Hawk Psychologist Phoenix teaches mindfulness practices that encourage present-moment awareness. Techniques such as deep breathing, progressive muscle relaxation, and meditation can help calm the nervous system and reduce anxiety symptoms.
Exposure Therapy
For those struggling with phobias or social anxiety, gradual exposure to feared situations can help desensitize the brain’s fear response. Under Dr. Hawk’s guidance, clients learn to face their fears in a controlled and supportive environment.
Lifestyle and Behavioral Changes
Physical health plays a significant role in mental well-being. Dr. Hawk encourages clients to adopt healthy lifestyle habits, such as regular exercise, balanced nutrition, and proper sleep hygiene, which can all contribute to reducing anxiety.
Identifying Triggers and Developing Coping Strategies
Understanding what triggers anxiety allows individuals to prepare and respond more effectively. Dr Karen Hawk Psychologist helps clients create personalized coping strategies, such as journaling, self-care routines, and grounding exercises, to manage anxiety in everyday situations.
Seeking Help for Anxiety
If anxiety is interfering with your daily life, seeking professional support can make a significant difference. Therapy provides a safe space to explore fears, develop coping skills, and build resilience. With the right guidance, it’s possible to regain control and live a fulfilling life without being overwhelmed by anxiety.
Dr. Karen Hawk’s approach is rooted in empathy and expertise, helping individuals navigate their anxiety with practical tools and a deeper understanding of their emotional well-being. By addressing anxiety at its core, she empowers clients to move forward with confidence and peace of mind.
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7 Early Signs of OCD You Shouldn’t Ignore
Introduction:
Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) is a mental health condition that can significantly impact daily life. Recognizing the early signs of OCD is essential to obtaining timely help and support. Early intervention can often prevent symptoms from worsening and equip individuals with effective coping strategies. In this guide, we’ll explore seven early signs of OCD, offering insights to help you recognize this condition and take steps toward proper care.
What is OCD?
OCD is a mental health disorder characterized by unwanted, intrusive thoughts (obsessions) and repetitive behaviors (compulsions) that a person feels compelled to perform. These thoughts and actions can become time-consuming and distressing, impacting a person’s work, relationships, and overall well-being. Recognizing the early signs of OCD can be vital in seeking timely help.
For those seeking the best OCD treatment, consider visiting:
Delhi Mind Clinic
Dr. Sugandha Gupta
Dr. Paramjeet Singh
7 Early Signs of OCD
1. Repeated Checking
One common early sign of OCD is the compulsive need to check things repeatedly. This may include actions like ensuring the door is locked multiple times or repeatedly verifying that appliances are turned off. Individuals with OCD often feel an overwhelming sense of doubt or fear that something might go wrong if they don’t check repeatedly, leading to repeated, time-consuming actions.
2. Fear of Contamination
A heightened fear of contamination or germs is another early sign. People with OCD may have an intense aversion to touching objects or surfaces they perceive as “unclean.” This can lead to excessive hand-washing or the avoidance of certain places or people, ultimately affecting their social interactions and daily life.
3. Needing Things to Be “Just Right”
OCD can manifest as a need for orderliness and symmetry. Individuals might feel distressed if objects aren’t arranged in a certain way or if things are not “just right.” This can result in hours spent arranging and rearranging items, often at the expense of other important activities or obligations.
4. Intrusive Thoughts
Intrusive, distressing thoughts are a hallmark of OCD. These thoughts can be about anything, often focusing on subjects like harm, violence, or taboo topics that the person would never act on. While everyone experiences unwanted thoughts from time to time, those with OCD find these thoughts more persistent and distressing, which can lead to compulsive behaviors aimed at “neutralizing” the thoughts.
5. Repetitive Counting or Mental Rituals
Some individuals with OCD may engage in mental rituals, like counting or repeating words silently to themselves, to reduce anxiety. These rituals can feel necessary to alleviate distress or prevent perceived harm. For example, a person might feel compelled to count to a specific number before moving on to their next task or even engage in complex counting routines throughout the day.
6. Excessive Doubt and Need for Reassurance
OCD can lead to extreme doubt about one’s actions, thoughts, or safety. This often results in repeatedly seeking reassurance from loved ones. For example, a person might repeatedly ask if they’ve done something correctly or if they’re safe. This behavior not only affects the individual’s well-being but can also place a strain on relationships.
7. Avoidance of Certain Situations
As OCD progresses, individuals might start avoiding situations that trigger their obsessions and compulsions. For instance, someone with contamination fears may avoid public places or refuse to shake hands. This avoidance can limit their activities, social life, and opportunities, impacting their overall quality of life.
Why Recognizing Early Signs of OCD is Important
Identifying the signs of OCD early allows individuals to seek professional help sooner, which can lead to better long-term outcomes. Treatments, such as cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT), have proven effective in helping people manage their symptoms. Early intervention can make a difference in how OCD affects one’s life and reduce the condition’s impact on daily functioning.
Getting Help for OCD
If you or someone you know is experiencing these early signs of OCD, it may be beneficial to consult a mental health professional. While OCD is a chronic condition, treatments and coping mechanisms can significantly reduce symptoms and improve quality of life. Remember, seeking help is a positive and proactive step toward better mental health.
For more information on OCD and mental health resources, consider visiting these authoritative sources:
National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH) – Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder
Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) – Mental Health
MentalHealth.gov – Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder
By recognizing these early signs, individuals and their loved ones can take crucial steps to seek help, support, and effective interventions. Early action can make all the difference in managing OCD and living a fulfilling life.
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Is OCD Destroying Your Relationships?
Most people think OCD means compulsions like washing hands and knocking on wood. However, most people with OCD do not suffer from compulsions but are haunted by intrusive thoughts that just keep entering their heads.
Sometimes the thoughts can be non-stop, rendering them unable to focus on anything else. Otherwise, they can be crippled by irrational fears, such as fear of death, doing something bad, or contamination.
Loving someone with OCD can be challenging, as it is always hard to know at what point to be supportive, and at what point to hold them to account with regards to receiving treatment.
Whether you are a sufferer or a partner, the following scenarios may seem familiar:
Irrational fears
Fear of death: A sufferer may have recurrent intrusive thoughts that he, she, or a loved one is going to die. One patient of ours would not get on a plane because of fear that if he left the state, his wife would die.
Fear that something bad would happen: One sufferer did not cook because of fear that she would set fire to the house. She would keep checking the stove and did not want her husband to cook.
Fear of contamination: Cleaning the utensils over and over due to fear that themselves, their partner, and their children would be contaminated; Washing the dishes again after the partner has washed them.
Fear of losing their job: Recurrent intrusive thoughts about job loss could lead to starting early, working late, and fear of spending money even if there is no evidence that their employment is unstable.
The sufferer may constantly need validation and reassurance, which over time can become tiring and annoying to the partner. The need for reassurance can lead to a loss of attraction.
Avoidance Behaviors
Avoidance of intimacy due to intrusive thoughts about bodily fluids and smells; avoidance of showering and baths because of contamination fears.
It is common for individuals with OCD to be focused on their obsessions but oblivious to how their poor personal hygiene is experienced by others. Avoidance behaviors may be secondary to intrusive violent and sexual thoughts.
The sufferer may be ashamed to tell their partner. This can lead to further frustration as the partner has no idea what is going on. For example, one patient was unable to pick up her baby due to fear of violent intrusive thoughts and insisted on a full-time nanny. She was unable to tell her husband, who thought she did not care about the baby.
Treatment of OCD includes:
Medication: Medication can cause rapid resolution in OCD symptoms
Individual therapy: Supplements
Alternative treatment: Yoga, meditation, acupuncture
Relationship therapy: Relationship therapy helps a partner understand a sufferer's OCD. It also helps a sufferer understand the effect their OCD symptoms are having on their partner.
To learn more about OCD treatment, visit our website at https://gabapsychiatrist.com/ocd/
#OCD#intrusive thoughts#Postpartum OCD#MentalHealthAwareness#ocd awareness#ocdsupport#mental health matters#breakthestigma#endthestigma
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OCD and Social Media: How the Digital World Can Affect Symptoms
In today's hyper-connected society, social media has become an integral part of our daily lives. While it offers countless benefits, it also has the potential to negatively impact mental health, particularly for individuals dealing with obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD). This article explores how social media can influence OCD symptoms and highlights the importance of finding effective treatment options.
Understanding OCD and Its Symptoms
Obsessive-compulsive disorder is characterized by persistent, unwanted thoughts (obsessions) and repetitive behaviors or mental acts (compulsions) aimed at reducing anxiety. Individuals with OCD often find themselves trapped in a cycle of intrusive thoughts and compulsive behaviors, leading to significant distress and impairment in daily functioning. Common symptoms include excessive cleaning, counting, checking, and the need for symmetry or order.
The Role of Social Media
Social media platforms like Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter provide an avenue for connection and expression. However, they can also exacerbate feelings of inadequacy, anxiety, and compulsive behaviors, especially for those with OCD. Here are several ways in which social media can impact OCD symptoms:
1. Comparison Culture
One of the most significant downsides of social media is the constant exposure to curated images and stories. For individuals with OCD, this can intensify feelings of inadequacy and the need for perfection. They may compare their lives, homes, and even thoughts to the seemingly flawless portrayals of others. This comparison can trigger obsessive thoughts about not measuring up, leading to increased compulsive behaviors as they strive to achieve an unattainable standard.
2. Cyberbullying and Negative Feedback
Social media can be a breeding ground for negative comments and cyberbullying. Individuals with OCD may be particularly sensitive to criticism, which can heighten their anxiety and obsessive thoughts. The fear of being judged or misunderstood can lead to increased compulsions as they attempt to control their environment and mitigate perceived threats.
3. Exposure to Triggers
Social media can inadvertently expose individuals to their specific OCD triggers. For example, someone with contamination fears might encounter posts related to cleanliness or germs that exacerbate their anxiety. The constant availability of content can make it difficult to escape these triggers, leading to a worsening of symptoms.
4. The Cycle of Reassurance-Seeking
Individuals with OCD often seek reassurance to alleviate their anxiety. Social media can facilitate this behavior, as people may post questions or concerns, seeking validation from others. While this may provide temporary relief, it can also reinforce compulsive behavior and lead to a cycle of dependency on external validation.
Finding Balance: Managing Social Media Use
For those with OCD, managing social media use is crucial. Here are some strategies to create a healthier relationship with social media:
Set Boundaries: Limit the amount of time spent on social media each day. Consider setting specific times for checking feeds to avoid mindless scrolling.
Curate Your Feed: Unfollow accounts that trigger negative thoughts or feelings. Surround yourself with positive, uplifting content that encourages growth and acceptance.
Practice Mindfulness: Engage in mindfulness techniques to help manage intrusive thoughts and compulsive behaviors. Being present can help reduce the impact of social media on your mental health.
Seek Professional Support: Consider working with a mental health professional who understands OCD and its relationship with social media. They can provide tailored strategies and coping mechanisms.
Innovative Treatment Options: The Role of Ketamine
While managing social media use is essential, finding effective treatment for OCD is equally important. Traditional therapies, such as cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT), are often beneficial. However, some individuals may find that these approaches alone do not fully address their symptoms.Ketamine, traditionally known as an anesthetic, has emerged as a promising treatment for various mental health disorders, including OCD. Research indicates that Ketamine can provide rapid relief from symptoms, particularly in individuals who have not responded well to conventional treatments. Its ability to modulate glutamate levels in the brain may play a role in reducing obsessive thoughts and compulsive behaviors.If you're seeking OCD treatment in Orange County, it’s essential to consult with a qualified healthcare provider who can guide you in exploring Ketamine therapy as a potential option. Combining traditional therapies with innovative treatments like Ketamine can offer a comprehensive approach to managing OCD symptoms effectively.
Conclusion
Social media can significantly impact individuals with OCD, influencing their symptoms and overall mental health. Understanding the effects of digital engagement is crucial for developing coping strategies and finding effective treatment options. By being mindful of social media use and exploring innovative treatments like Ketamine, individuals can work toward a healthier relationship with both their mental health and the digital world. If you or someone you know is struggling with OCD, seeking help from mental health professionals is a vital step toward recovery and improved well-being.
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(BLACK AND RED HATS - NEGATIVE EFFECTS + EMOTIONAL ASPECTS)
Symptoms of BDD According to Better Health Channel:
Symptoms can vary according to which body part (or parts) is targeted, but general symptoms of BDD include:
thinking about the perceived defect for hours every day
worrying about their failure to match the ‘physical perfection’ of models and celebrities
distress about their preoccupation
constantly asking trusted loved ones for reassurance about their looks, but not believing the answer
constantly looking at their reflection or taking pains to avoid catching their reflection (for example, throwing away or covering up mirrors)
constant dieting and overexercising
grooming to excess – for example, shaving the same patch of skin over and over
avoiding any situation they feel will call attention to their defect. In extreme cases, this can mean never leaving home
taking great pains to hide or camouflage the ‘defect’
squeezing or picking at skin blemishes for hours on end
wanting dermatological treatment or cosmetic surgery, even when professionals believe the treatment is unnecessary
repeat cosmetic surgery procedures, especially if the same body part is being ‘improved’ with each procedure
depression and anxiety, including suicidal thoughts.
...According to Youtube
youtube
Frequent Critical Thoughts About Appearance The first sign of BDD is having frequent critical thoughts about one's physical appearance, even when the perceived flaws are not noticeable to others. Despite reassurance from friends and doctors, individuals with BDD may still view parts of their body as deformed or ugly.
Repetitive Behaviors or Mental Acts
Another sign of BDD is engaging in repetitive behaviors or mental acts, such as spending an excessive amount of time looking in mirrors, surfaces, or cameras to check on perceived flaws. These negative thoughts about appearance may manifest as a compulsive need to check or compare one's body image.
Significant Distress or Impairment A key feature of BDD is when obsessions and compulsions cause significant distress or impairment in various areas of life, such as work, school, or social relationships. This level of distress or impairment is a determining factor in diagnosing a mental disorder.
Delusional Thoughts About Others' Perceptions While not a diagnostic criterion, it is common for individuals with BDD to have delusional thoughts that others are judging or mocking them for their appearance, even without evidence. This delusion of reference can lead to intense distress.
Not Meeting Criteria for an Eating Disorder To be diagnosed with BDD, an individual cannot meet the criteria for an eating disorder, such as anorexia or binge eating disorder. BDD is characterized by a preoccupation with perceived physical flaws, rather than a focus on weight or body shape.
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A Brief Overview Of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) and How To Treat It?
Repetitive actions (compulsions) are a hallmark of obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), which is characterized by intrusive, unwelcome ideas & anxieties (obsessions). If you face such symptoms, immediately visit Nasha Mukti Kendra in Ghaziabad. Compulsions and obsessions like these are highly disruptive to daily life and can lead to intense emotional suffering.
Your distress and worry will only escalate if you try to overlook or stop such obsessions. In the end, you feel compelled to engage in obsessive behaviors in an effort to alleviate your anxiety. Negative ideas or impulses persist despite your best efforts to block them out of your mind. Because of this, OCD sufferers are more likely to engage in ritualistic actions.
Although those with OCD often feel bad about themselves, there is help available.
Symptoms
Both compulsive behaviors are common features of OCD. However, it is possible to experience merely the obsession or compulsion symptoms. You may or may not be aware of how much time and energy your needs and desires consume and how they hinder your ability to participate in everyday activities like going to school or working.
Signs of an obsession
Obsessions in obsessive-compulsive disorder are intrusive, uncontrollable thoughts, desires, or pictures that give the sufferer extreme distress. You may engage in a compulsive action or ritual in an effort to block out unwanted thoughts or feelings. These preoccupations frequently interrupt your thoughts and actions when you intend to focus on anything else.
Typical obsessional themes include:
Contamination phobia; aversion to dirt
Having difficulties accepting ambiguity and experiencing doubt
requiring symmetry & order
violent and/or dreadful ideas of self- or other-inflicted injury
Intrusive, often aggressive, ideas about touchy matters like religion or sexuality
The following are some symptoms commonly associated with obsession:
Hypochondriacal reactions to handling items that other people have handled
Questions about whether or not you've taken necessary safety measures
Extreme anxiety if things aren't in their proper places or facing the right direction
Fears of accidentally plowing into a crowd of people in a car
Ideas of swearing or acting badly in public Uncomfortable mental imagery of a sexual nature
Avoiding activities, like shaking hands, may bring on obsessive thoughts and behaviors
Indicators of compulsion
Compulsions are compulsive actions that people with OCD feel compelled to engage in. If you're anxious about your obsessions, these mental or behavioral rituals can help ease your mind. Yet, giving in to the compulsions never feels good and, at most, provides a fleeting reprieve from anxiety.
Having obsessive thoughts can lead to worry. Therefore, you may devise rules or rituals to follow. These obsessions go far beyond what is necessary to solve the underlying issue.
Similar to obsessions, compulsions often revolve around recurring ideas:
Purifying by washing
Checking Counting Orderliness
Adhering to a regimented schedule
looking for reassurance
Some indications of compulsion include:
Scrubbing your hands until they bleed
Repeatedly double-checking locked doors
Making many checks to see if the stove is still on
Following expected counting patterns
Prayer or silent repetition of a word or phrase
Aligning all of your canned foods in the same direction
Conclusion
Thematic preoccupations are common in OCD; contamination anxiety is just one example. For excessive effects of OCDs, you should simply visit Nasha Mukti Kendra. Yet, if you suffer from a phobia of germs, you could wash both of your hands excessively until they are raw and cracked. The words "obsessing" & "obsessed" are thrown around rather carelessly in common speech. However, OCD takes things to an even more severe level. It can be very time-consuming. It's disruptive to day-to-day living. People with OCD experience unwelcome obsessions, while they don't take pleasure in engaging in their compulsive rituals.
Read Our Blog: What is Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD)? And Causes, Symptoms & Treatment
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What is hyper-responsibility?
Also known as an inflated sense of responsibility, hyper-responsibility is when you feel that you have more control over the world than you actually do. You might feel responsible for things that you can't realistically control, including how other people behave and feel, natural disasters, accidents, and more. When something goes wrong, you might blame yourself and feel guilty.
You might also take action to "fix" the problem or prevent it from happening again, even if it's totally out of your control. An inflated sense of responsibility may also lead to other behaviours, such as:
Mental Review and Mental Checking: Some people may engage in mental review and mental checking to reassure themselves that they are not responsible for their feared outcomes. For example, a person might spend hours recalling a conversation with a friend to be sure they didn't say anything hurtful or offensive. They might replay every moment they can remember from the conversation a dozen times and attempt to arrive at a definitive conclusion about whether or not they said something offensive and need to apologize, which they may significantly overdo.
Excess Research: A person may engage in compulsive research about the feares they are experiencing. For example, someone may fear they could run over a pedestrian or an animal while driving. They may spend hours researching this possibility online or looking for new reports of hit and runs they fear they could be responsible for.
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Me finding out hyper-responsibility and responsibility OCD are a thing 😐 never read about a disorder/behavior that so specifically matched my weird f**king problems.


Guess I will bring this up in therapy...
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Understanding Harm OCD and Its Variants: Gay OCD and HOCD

Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) is a complex and often misunderstood mental health condition that can manifest in various forms. One of its lesser-known but equally distressing variants is Harm OCD. This variant can also take on specific themes, such as Gay OCD (or SO-OCD) and Harm OCD Symptoms, which sometimes overlap with HOCD (Homosexual Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder). In this article, we will explore what Harm OCD is, its symptoms, and how it intersects with these specific themes.
Harm OCD: A Brief Overview
Harm OCD is characterized by intrusive, distressing, and often irrational thoughts, images, or impulses that involve causing harm to oneself or others. These intrusive thoughts can lead to intense anxiety and distress, prompting individuals to engage in compulsive behaviors or mental rituals to alleviate their fears. The core feature of Harm OCD is the obsession with causing harm, which is often misaligned with an individual's true intentions or values.
Harm OCD Symptoms
1. Intrusive Thoughts: Individuals with Harm OCD experience recurring, distressing thoughts of causing harm, such as physically hurting someone or oneself. These thoughts are often ego-dystonic, meaning they are inconsistent with the person's true desires.
2. Anxiety and Distress: The intrusive thoughts in Harm OCD lead to extreme anxiety and emotional distress. The fear of acting on these thoughts can be overwhelming.
3. Compulsive Behaviors: To neutralize their anxiety, individuals with Harm OCD may engage in compulsive behaviors, such as checking and rechecking, seeking reassurance from others, or mental rituals like counting or reciting prayers.
4. Avoidance: Some people with Harm OCD may avoid situations or places that trigger their intrusive thoughts, making it difficult for them to carry out daily activities.
5. Time-Consuming: The rituals and avoidance behaviors associated with Harm OCD can be time-consuming and disruptive to everyday life.
Gay OCD (SO-OCD)
Gay OCD, also known as Sexual Orientation OCD (SO-OCD), is a subtype of Harm OCD where the individual obsesses about their sexual orientation. Contrary to the name, it can affect individuals of any sexual orientation. People with Gay OCD often experience intrusive thoughts questioning their sexual identity or orientation. These thoughts can be distressing, leading them to seek reassurance or avoid situations that trigger their doubts.
HOCD (Homosexual Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder)
HOCD is a variant of Harm OCD where individuals who identify as heterosexual obsessively doubt their sexual orientation, fearing they might be homosexual. It's important to note that HOCD does not reflect one's true sexual orientation but is rather a manifestation of the intrusive nature of OCD. People with HOCD may engage in compulsions to prove their heterosexuality or avoid situations that trigger their doubts.
Treatment for Harm OCD and Its Variants
The good news is that OCD, including Harm OCD and its specific themes, is a treatable condition. Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT), particularly a form called Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP), is often the first-line treatment. ERP involves confronting the feared thoughts without engaging in compulsions or avoidance behaviors, gradually reducing anxiety over time.
Medication, such as selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs), may also be prescribed in combination with therapy to manage OCD symptoms.
Harm OCD, including its subtypes like Gay OCD and HOCD, can have a profound impact on individuals' lives, causing significant distress and impairment. It's crucial to recognize that these intrusive thoughts do not reflect an individual's true intentions or identity. Seeking professional help from a mental health specialist experienced in treating OCD is the first step toward managing these distressing symptoms. With the right treatment and support, individuals with Harm OCD and its variants can lead fulfilling lives free from the burden of obsessive thoughts and compulsive behaviors.
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Body dysmorphic disorder
Body Dysmorphic Disorder (BDD) is a mental health condition characterized by an obsessive preoccupation with perceived flaws or defects in one's appearance, which are often unnoticeable or minor to others. Individuals with BDD may spend a significant amount of time and energy focusing on these perceived flaws, which can lead to significant distress and impairment in daily functioning.
Some common features of BDD include:
Excessive concern or preoccupation with a specific body part or parts (e.g., nose, skin, hair).
Engaging in repetitive behaviors or mental acts such as checking mirrors, seeking reassurance, or grooming excessively.
Avoidance of social situations or activities due to concerns about appearance.
Comparing one's appearance to others and feeling inferior or inadequate.
Seeking frequent cosmetic procedures or surgeries to fix perceived flaws, often with little satisfaction even after the procedure.
Significant distress or impairment in social, occupational, or other areas of functioning.
Body Dysmorphic Disorder can significantly impact an individual's quality of life and may co-occur with other mental health conditions such as depression, anxiety disorders, or obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD). Treatment typically involves a combination of psychotherapy (such as cognitive-behavioral therapy) and medication (such as selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors or SSRIs) to address the obsessive thoughts and compulsive behaviors associated with BDD.
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3 Most Common Worldbuilding Mistakes for Writers and How to Fix Them
Every year, we’re lucky to have great sponsors for our nonprofit events. World Anvil, a 2021 NaNoWriMo sponsor, helps you develop and organize your characters, plot, and world setting. Today, World Anvil founder Janet Forbes is here to share some pro tips for worldbuilding. Don’t forget to check out the offer to NaNoWriMo writers for 30% off a World Anvil membership!
I talk to hundreds of writers every week, in our World Anvil Q&A live streams, our World Anvil writing challenges, and meetings with our professional authors. And mostly, they’re encountering the same few worldbuilding problems! Here are the 3 most common worldbuilding mistakes, and how you can fix them:
1. Mary-Sue Worldbuilding
You’re probably familiar with the Mary-Sue—a flawless, artificial-feeling main character. Mary Sue Worldbuilding follows in the same vein. If everything in your setting is directly related to your main character, it feels like the world revolves around them. It’s too convenient and artificial. That’s Mary-Sue worldbuilding.
Mary-Sue worldbuilding is usually caused by worldbuilding exclusively around your plot. Introducing larger-scale conflict in the backdrop of your setting, current affairs like civil or religious movements, war, disasters, or technological breakthroughs, can help expand the world beyond just your main character.
Your main character might interact with these elements, or more usually, with problems caused by them. For example, they might help some refugees from “that war over there”. But your character should not be at the core of everything—they’re not the cause of the war. Other things are happening outside of your story, in the background. (Pro-tip: this is a great way to reinforce your genre and themes, and make your world feel alive and expansive, too!).
Fixing Mary-Sue Worldbuilding Of course you’ll need a series bible like World Anvil to help you keep these current affairs organized, connect them together, and make sure you don’t lose your notes! Use World Anvil’s worldbuilding templates to get inspired for your big conflicts, and remember - you only need to write a few bullet points to start with! You can always expand more later (we’ll talk more about that in a moment).
World Anvil’s Worldbuilding Templates are custom-made by experts to help inspire and guide your creativity—and you can customize your own templates too!
2. Mosaic Worldbuilding
You know those computer game worlds where each area feels like a self-contained zone? Where the “desert” region and the “forest” region have no trade, communication, or overlap between them? That, in a nutshell, is Mosaic worldbuilding. It ruins suspension of disbelief, makes your novel setting feel false, and can pull your readers out of your story!
Fixing Mosaic Worldbuilding
The best way to avoid Mosaic Worldbuilding is to make sure that you have a clear overview of your world early on, with each major region and concept penned out in just a sentence or two. That way, each region will feel like a connected aspect of your seamless setting, not a tile shoved on the side.
On World Anvil, each world setting has a “Worldbuilding Meta” section to help you detail the 10,000 foot overview—the big stuff. And not just your physical world and its people, but your genre, your motivations, and your themes. This invaluable reference tool helps you expand your setting and add more detail, and will also help you sense-check what you’re adding!
Once you have a clear picture of your meta, and know the overview of your world, it’ll be easy to make use of cultural aspects like imports and travellers, cultural diasporas and geographical transition zones to make your world seem more connected and less artificially divided! And you’ll be able to do it without spending too much extra time worldbuilding. Which brings me to my final common worldbuilding mistake…
World Anvil’s Worldbuilding Meta tool helps you focus, streamline and sense-check your world setting! It’s full of guides to create an excellent overview for your worldbuilding project. This is the view mode of Manifold Sky by B.C.G. Wurth.
3. Worldbuilder’s Disease
Sounds nasty, right? Well, Worldbuilder’s Disease is a very common problem—a compulsion to continue worldbuilding things which aren’t actually useful. Here’s my favorite example—the “elven shoes”:
In your world you have elves. They wear shoes. So far, so good. Maybe there’s a plot-point where an imposter’s revealed because they’re wearing the wrong shoes. So you fill in a few details on your series bible. But if you find yourself writing a 5,000 word treatise on elven shoes through the ages… honey, you have worldbuilder’s disease.
I use shoes as an example, but it could be anything. It might be detailing three centuries of monarchy, or expanding unvisited areas in excruciating detail. Sure, it can be fun, but all that time spent on unnecessary parts of your setting isn’t helping you polish the core parts—or get your novel written! It’s distracting you from your primary goal.
Curing Worldbuilder’s Disease
There are three major causes of worldbuilders disease:
Lack of perspective
Lovers of prose
Fear of losing your ideas
1. Lack of perspective
Lack of perspective can often lead down a worldbuilding rabbit hole. Keep clarity on what’s important in your setting with tools like World Anvil’s Worldbuilding Meta. This helps you define your active worldbuilding area - not just geographical but thematic areas—which helps streamline your world and your project, so you can be sure you’re spending your time where it counts!
Also, be clear with yourself WHY you’re worldbuilding the element you’re working on. Keep clear notes in your series bible about how this new element fits into your novel. If it’s little more than set dressing, you only need a few words. For a core concept, you might need more.
2. Lovers of Prose
As writers, we love to write (duh)! But for most of us, writing in prose in our series bible can cause serious problems. Not only does it mean that you write MORE than we should (your get in flow, words happen!), it’s also harder to reference your ideas quickly later on. Stick to short, organized articles in note form. Make sure the salient information is there, and link in anything relevant. You can always expand to prose later if you need to.
Keep your series bible in brief notes with clear headers! This character article took 5 minutes using World Anvil’s character template which automatically adds the headers. The linked articles help me easily reference related people and places as I’m writing.
3. Fear of losing our ideas
Fear of losing our ideas is actually one of the most common reasons for worldbuilder’s disease—that we’ll forget or lose our notes if we don’t write them out in vast detail. To combat this, make sure you have somewhere to keep your world details safe, organized, tagged and searchable. Then you can reassure yourself that you can go back and develop more later if you need it.
Obviously, World Anvil is custom made for this, backing up everything in one place and linking everything together, so you can easily search, reference and update your series bible whilst writing your manuscript and not have to worry about losing things!
Anything here ring true for you? Or maybe you’re struggling with another worldbuilding mistake or problem? You can always hop into our live streamed Q&A sessions on our Twitch channel and ask us directly! We go live three times a week to answer questions about writing and worldbuilding, as well as helping our community with World Anvil queries too! Maybe we’ll see you there. And happy worldbuilding :)
Janet Forbes is a published fantasy author and RPG writer, whose recent credits include the Dark Crystal RPG with the Henson Company (coming 2021). In 2017, she and her husband created World Anvil, the ultimate worldbuilding and novel writing platform. World Anvil helps you organize, store and develop your worldbuilding and series bible privately, and market your books to the world too! The inbuilt novel writing software, accessible from anywhere, integrates seamlessly with your worldbuilding. And when it’s time to publish, you can export, or publish directly on the World Anvil platform and monetize YOUR way! Check it out at World Anvil.
#nanowrimo#camp nanowrimo#writing#amwriting#worldbuilding#writing advice#by nano sponsor#world anvil#janet forbes
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A View to a Kill - Cillian Murphy x Fem!Reader
Author’s note: Hey hey people! First off I wanna say I’m always quite nervous writing for real people as opposed to characters as I don’t want to disrespect anybody (or make it too unrealistic) so I did my best to make Cillian as accurate to who he is as possible (not that any of us truly know him but y’know- fantasy). Also I have never seen a Bond movie in my life shameful for a Film student I know so I hope my lack of knowledge didn’t prevent this from being accurate. Also Christopher Nolan is directing the next James Bond in this universe because plot lol. this is not very good I'm so sorry I tried
Word Count: 1452
CW: Drinking, cringy dialogue lol
Going to a premiere with your new coworker, Cillian, ends up with some drunken feelings exchanged between you two.
You were extremely nervous as the limo approached the theater, looking in your phone camera to check your hair. Your big break had finally come in the form of being a Bond girl in Christopher Nolan’s adaptation of 007, which is definitely no small feat. Nor did it feel like it, considering you were working 12 hour days in heels and doing all your own stunts for 3 months. Not to sound ungrateful, but it was just so much more work than you could’ve anticipated. But what really made it all worth it was Mr. Bond himself.
You were really nervous at first to work with Cillian. He was a world renowned actor, one of Nolan’s recurring actors, and not to mention, very handsome. You never wanted to admit it to yourself, but you had quite the crush on him. For a man much older than you, he still held a boyish charm and wit to him that seemed so distant from a lot of the suitors your age. But it was nothing but an innocent crush, and he really was a close friend to you after all.
Cillian was beside you, mingling with the rest of the cast while you sat there silently, stewing in the butterflies fluttering in your stomach. Cillian gave you a sympathetic smile.
“Nervous?” He asked, eyeing the shaking of your foot and the compulsive tucking of your hair.
You sighed. “I’ve never done anything like this before, I just don’t really know what to expect.”
Cillian chuckled. Not of rudeness, but at his own ridiculous question. Duh. Of course she’s nervous. “Understandable. Well, you have the first step down. You look gorgeous.” You felt your ears burn at his compliment and smiled. “Just follow my lead, and act confident. All you have to do is pose for some photos and do interviews, you can do this.” He gently put his hand over yours and squeezed it in reassurance. You took a deep breath as he grinned at you. With him by your side, you knew you could do anything you set your mind to.
After what seemed like hours of going between getting your photo taken and interviews, you felt like you could really get the hang of this whole fame thing. It was amazing to see fans screaming your name, paparazzi taking your photo… Not to sound egotistical, but it truly felt like that’s what you were supposed to be doing with your life. It definitely helped having Cillian there to look to when you were nervous and to take some photos with. Eventually though it came time to watch the movie, and you transitioned from the bright camera flashes to the dark intimacy of the theater.
You had to admit it was a surreal experience seeing yourself on screen. Part of you was definitely embarrassed, but you felt a great sense of pride seeing yourself in such a badass light. And your chemistry with Cillian was impressive. During scenes with the two of you in it, you could feel Cillian sat beside you, looking at you for your reaction. He envied you in a way. Nothing could compare to the first time seeing yourself up on the big screen. But at the same time he couldn’t believe how amazing you looked and how powerful of a performance you gave. Out of all the women he’d worked alongside, you held a certain spark that he knew would send you far.
After the movie, you and the rest of the cast attended an afterparty together at a bar close by. You couldn’t tell if it was the pressure of the night finally being lifted from your shoulders or the fact that you wanted to outshine Cillian’s Irish tolerance, but you were trying to get as drunk as possible. You lost count of how many shots of tequila you downed, Cillian watching you in shock as he took several shots himself. By the time your castmates were ready to continue your bar hopping, you could hardly stand. Cillian opted into being your very unstable column to keep you upright, although he was stumbling himself. You both made it out of the bar with the rest of your coworkers, laughing and hollering drunkenly. Paparazzi was swarming the outside, taking pictures of all of you in your very inebriated states.
A reporter ran out from behind all the people and cornered you and Cillian. In normal circumstances, you both would’ve just kept walking, but neither of you were really feeling like yourselves from the alcohol now running through your veins. She shoved the microphone in between the three of you, whipping out a notepad of what you assumed to be questions.
“Congratulations on the movie you two, how was the premiere?”
Cillian, being a rather outgoing drunk, immediately answered. “It was fantastic, it was amazing to see so much hard work finally come to fruition on screen like that. And it was especially amazing to see Y/N film debut, she’s incredibly talented.”
You slapped his arm playfully. “Excuse me Mr. Bond? Don’t be so modest, Jesus.” You all laughed. “The premiere was a dream come true, but it would’ve been nothing without Cill. His performance was Oscar-worthy, and he was just a thrill to work with.”
Cillian laughed again, his already red cheeks deepening. He always loved it when you called him that nickname. “She’s just saying that because she has to.”
The reporter chuckled a bit. “It seems as though you guys have a lot of chemistry on and off set, do you think you will work together again?”
You and Cillian both went to talk, interrupting each other and earning a choir of giggles from the two of you. “Obviously we don’t have too much chemistry with the way that just went.” You joked.
“Don’t say that, don’t say that.” Cillian said, laughing. “It would be an honor to work with Y/N again. I think she’s one of the most brilliant up and coming actors of our time. Honestly I was really sad when we wrapped up shooting, because it meant I wouldn’t get to see her everyday like I was used to.” He wrapped his arm around your shoulder, squeezing you to his side.
Normally you would be extremely flustered being that close to him, but your swirling brain kept you from registering the intimacy of his touch. Instead, your head laid on his chest and you leaned into him for more support. ”Yeah, that last day of shooting was really difficult. I remember- and I know he’ll never admit this- but when we finished that last scene we did a group hug and Cillian cried because he said he’d miss me. We just became so close it was hard not to be emotional.”
“Aww! Is that true, Cillian?” The reporter asked, turning the microphone over to him.
“All lies. Everything this woman tells is a lie.” He joked, a smirk crossing his lips.
“Not true!” You squealed, hitting him again in the arm.
“And she’s violent too. Twice she’s hit me just while you’re standing here. So unprofessional.” Him and the reporter laughed, but even in your drunken state you felt pretty embarrassed. He could tell by the look on your face he took it too far, and tried to think of a way to ease the blow.
“We actually have to go now, thank you for the interview.” Cillian abruptly said, pulling you away from her and the crowds of photographers. You piled back into the limo amongst your now angry castmates who had been waiting on you.
“You’re not mad, are you…?” Cillian asked softly, his cocky attitude now dwindling from his sobering and finally being out of the spotlight for the night.
“Of course I’m not mad at you Cill, I’m not as sensitive as you. Crybaby.” You smirked at him.
“Yeah, right. That’s why you were pouting like a child after I called you a liar.”
“I was not pouting!”
His bottom lip curled and his brows furrowed. “I was not pouting!” He mocked.
You scoffed, crossing your arms and turning away from him. Then you felt his lips gently graze your cheek and turned to face him again.
“I meant everything I said, y’know. About you being amazing.” He smiled.
You looked down, a bit embarrassed. “I know. And I meant it when I said I expect you to be on the Oscar ballots this year.”
“We’ll see.” He winked at you. You both settled into the limo, trying to gather your thoughts and sober up a bit.
You smiled to yourself, marveling in how amazing your life had become. Finally the limo took off and you were on your way to another bar, and hopefully more drinks.
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