#whoever wrote this just does not have the range

[segretecose]

persuasion (2022) you're not emma (2020) you were never emma (2020) even if you wanted to be emma (2020) you could not be emma (2020) because you are not that kind of girl.

[unholyhelbig]

part 4 mob boss mommy *i mean natty oops*

Title: The Oversight [Part 4/7]

Ship: Female!Reader x Natasha Romanoff

Wordcount: 4325

Warnings: Gun imagery, heights, unecessary tension, horrible grammar, and funnel cake

[A/n: Heads up, I wrote this while I had the flu & a pretty bad fever, so it's not my greatest work. Thank you all for the postive feedback!]

[ Part one | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four | Part Five | Part Six | Part Seven ]

Main Masterlist | Read my stuff on AO3 | Leave Requests

“Hit me.” Natasha’s words were growled, a low rumble compared to the warm spring breeze that produced nothing but a balmy environment. Sweat glossed her collarbone, moved against expanses of skin that you had let yourself imagine, but had never seen. She was a distraction, despite being your instructor.

Her wrapped fist made contact with your jaw, a metallic taste coating your tongue. You let out a grunt of protest, fingers quickly working against the area to ease the throbbing pain. “That wasn’t fair,”

“You think they’re going to play fair? Focus up. Hit me.”

There was something about being this close to Natasha that formed a pit in your stomach. You were meant to have skin on skin contact, though most of your mornings for the past two weeks had been spent at the gun range, she had deemed you ready enough to learn how to fight. It was an art, you figured, not just something you could blindly go into.

For the first fifteen minutes of your day, you had watched Natasha and Kate spar. Yelena was standing next to you, a borderline predatory gaze on her face. You’d realized that it was one of the only emotions she harbored, and that Clint was rightful in his fear. Still, her attention was not focused on you, and that was good enough for the time being.

Instead, it was homed in on Kate. “I have been teaching her for nearly a year now.”

“She’s good.”

“You do not have to lie, y/n. She’s sloppy, reckless. Look how calculated Natalia is.”

Those emerald eyes were tracking every move the taller girl made. She’d initiated contact with Kate’s ribs, with her knees, and her shoulders. She’d fallen to the grass more times than you could count, but she still got up. That’s what seemed to count around here. Even as green a brown stained her workout gear, and as purple blotches of dead blood rose to the surface of her skin.

“It pays to learn fighting styles. That is something the Danver’s family does not understand. They hire whoever they can. Bodies over skill, it can work in some situations, but not all.”

“When did this… war start?”

“Mm, the power struggle has been raging for decades. Our parents, and their parents, and their parents before them. Both of us were trained to take over the family business. Men, they fight with their hearts and not their heads. When Carol and Natalia took up the mantel, things only got worse.”

You felt silly, growing up on these city blocks, and not realizing that a fight bigger than yourself was raging just within the shadows. You supposed that was a good thing. If you knew, you’d have taken Ronnie out of here in a second.

Kate hit the ground for a fourth time, the air knocked out of her lungs. She still had enough left to groan and prop herself up on her elbows. Natasha chuckled, the sound bubbling past her lips. This was much too fun for her.

“She is fragile.” Yelena nudged you with her arm. You frowned. Kate accepted the outstretched hand and allowed herself to be pulled to her feet. She looked dazed. “Do not tell her I said so, but she was looking for a project. You have to give it your all. For both of your sakes.”

You drew in a breath to respond, but Yelena clapped a hand on your back before taking a step toward the dueling duo. “Alright Nat! I think you’ve tortured Kate Bishop enough. Do not break her.”

Kate was bouncing back and forth on the balls of her feet, her fists raised in a defensive position. Her lip was split, rusty crimson against the corner of her mouth. “I can do this all day.”

“You do not have to.” Yelena’s nose scrunched up “You stink. Go take a shower.”

The blonde shoved Kate playfully towards the house, trailing behind her and murmuring things in Russian. She’d left you alone with Natasha, something you had become quite accustomed to. In your workout gear, you felt more than a little exposed, her stare raking up and down your form before her cheeks turned a deeper shade of pink than they already were.

The two of you had sat on the lawn chairs as she wrapped your knuckles, had you punch the palm of her hand to see how much blowback it would cause. You were holding back, and you both knew it. Her last command had been non-negotiable.

When you swung your right hand towards her jaw, Natasha wrapped her fingers around your wrist. She had flipped you onto the ground with enough force to knock the air from your lungs. You’d flailed in panic instead of going limp like Kate had.

You’d dragged Natasha down on top of you. Her body weight was warm from the beating sun, her elbows on either side of your head. Natasha’s knee was between yours, pressing into your core. You let out a small gasp at the sensation, pulling in her musky scent of sweat and clove.

Stray strands of russet hair framed Natasha’s face as she peered down at you, her chest heaving, each breath pushing her closer to you. Her nose was brushed against yours. The two of you were impossibly close, soul-crushingly so. You were certain that she could feel your heartbeat through your shirt.

She made a quite noise “Pet, if you wanted to get me on top of you, all you had to do was ask.”

Your gaze had given you away, and Natasha suddenly had a shit-eating grin against her lips. You hooked your legs against hers an arm wrapping around her waist. In a smooth move, you had her flipped against the grass, eyes reflecting the blue of the cloudless sky. She nearly seemed impressed, and you preened at the stare.

That was before her knee came up and knocked the wind out of you for the second time. You grunted, rolling off her. The two of you stared up at the sky for a few moments before she hoisted herself up and offered you a hand. You batted it away out of habit, rising on your own.

“When you fall, you fall with grace.” Natasha said, her voice stoney, right back to her serious self. “That way you don’t end up like we just were.”

“And if they ask?” you lifted an eyebrow at her, a hint of malice in her voice. She took a step closer to you, and that ever-intoxicating scent filled your lungs once more. Your ribs still ached from her kick, fingers massaging the sore spot. However, all of your movement halted.

Her voice was murmured and rusty. “I don’t want anyone else on top of you.”

“Okay,” You whispered, throat suddenly tight. “Then show me how.”

Veronica had the excited reflection of light in her eyes. They scanned the traveling fair that had been set up in the park bordering the harbor and a square city block. Each year, tents with local vendors would go up, rides and carnival games in their stead.

The scent of kettle corn filled your lungs, a mix of sweet and salty that reminded you of your own childhood spent here. It was the one constant that every foster family took part in. Sometimes you’d be given a stack of tickets, others, you’d get enough for a large cup of the best lemonade you had ever tasted.

Her hand tightened around yours, squeezing in excitement. Despite your current situation, you couldn’t help but smile. The soft sound of music and the light breeze was enough to make your forget about your aching muscles, and the light sweater that you had thrown on to hide the bruising against your shoulders, your arms, and collarbone. Natasha had really done a number on you.

“Jimmy is a nice guy, he really is, but the whole magic thing is driving me nuts.” Darcy used her forefingers to pinch off a bit of blue cotton candy, shoving it into her mouth. She talked around the melting sugar. “Seriously, he spilled my coffee all over my lap attempting a card trick and then attempted to mop it up with a never-ending handkerchief.”

You snickered at that, earning a look cut from glass. “What? I’m sorry about your drycleaning, but it is kind of funny.”

“Yeah, whatever. I just have to grow a backbone. He doesn’t try to pull that shit with Monica. No one tries to pull that shit with her.” She knelt in front of Ronnie, tucking a piece of hair behind her ear. “You’re not going to tolerate stupid magic tricks, are you?”

She was met with a silent, but amused stare, her eyebrow lifted. You’d been leveled with that look more than once yourself. It dissolved you into more laughter. “Alright, alright. No magic for the kid. Does the Ferris Wheel count as magic?”

“Well sure, but only at the worlds fair.”

You rolled your eyes but effectively tugged them both into the line. It had always been one of your favorites. It gave you a good look at the city you called home. Of course, your view of that city had been stunted lately. It never truly changed the beauty of the lights and the way they reflected off the water.

Your shoulder came in contact with chilled leather, your attention having been trained on fishing through your pockets for the small red tickets. Your eyes shot up, ready to rush out an apology until the words stopped in your throat.

Seeing Natasha outside of her manor was jarring. She looked nearly the same, a tight-fitting black T-shirt and a leather jacket draped over her shoulders. Her hair was loose, unlike it was at training earlier in the day, cascading down her shoulders. Her make-up was light, her unripe stare pouring into yours. That bewilderment melted into her cool exterior as if it were never there in the first place.

“Natasha,” the word poured from your lips before you could stop it, and the corner of her mouth quirked up in amusement. “Sorry, I wasn’t paying attention.”

“I can take a hit” She stated matter-of-factly. You were well aware of the fact, and you had to stifle a shiver as it worked its way down your spine. Hours before she had been nestled so perfectly on top of you.

Your cheeks heated up and you glanced sparingly at your friend, her own eyes going back and forth between the both of you. It was then that you noticed Clint, towering over Natasha with his arms crossed over his chest. He gave you a finger wave, and you lifted your chin in return.

“I’m Darcy, you are?” She was beyond forward, and it made you internally cringe. She reached her hand out to the very woman that ran the city. It was like sticking your hand in the lions enclosure covered in steak sauce.

“Natasha,” her words dripped with a subtle hint of her accent “This is Clint.”

“Howdy,” he knelt then, Veronica was clinging tightly to your leg, peeking around tentatively. She hugged you closer as he spoke. “You must be Veronica.”

The woman in front of you softened as you had never seen before. Her eyes grew brighter, though you could pin that on the circulating lights of the Ferris Wheel. There was a genuine smile on her lips as she looked at the girl who hugged you ever close.

“She doesn’t talk much, I’m afraid.” Your hand moved comfortingly to her shoulder. Ronnie seemed comfortable, if not excited about the rides that were teeming around them.  

Nat smiled at you “Oh, I’m sure she’ll speak when she has something to say.”

Ronnie’s death-grip on your leg seemed to loosen a bit as Clint straightened up. Darcy continued to scrutinize you and Natasha, something mischievous in her stare that you didn’t exactly care for. She rocked back and forth on her feet and directed her attention to Clint.

“How good are you at skeeball?”

“An absolute beast.” Clint replied.

“What do you say to a challenge? I bet I can kick your ass with the power of science. Winner springs for funnel cake.”

You picked up on the subtle look Clint gave Natasha and the even more subtle wave that she responded with. She blew an amused breath. Darcy stretched her hand towards Ronnie and wiggled her finger. “Kid, you staying or going?”

This time, Ronnie looked up at you for confirmation and you gave her a small, encouraging nod. She dislodged herself and wrapped her hand around Darcy’s. The promise of flaky and sweet funnel cake topped with powdered sugar was too tantalizing.

Admittedly, you were used to being left alone with Natasha at this point. Though it had mostly been in a business capacity. She seemed almost shy now, the line for the Ferris Wheel inching ever so closer.

“We can still go on, if you want.” She suggested.

“Yeah, yes. Of course.” You replied, “that would be lovely.”

“Your friend is very persistent.”

“She’s harmless, really.”

“And your daughter. She’s beautiful.” Natasha shoved her hands into her pockets, the two of you inching closer in line. “Just like her mother.”

Once again, you could feel the breath lodge in your throat, your cheeks flushing with fire. She was so bold at moments, and you remained silent in your conquest. There was no telling what was overstepping, though she blinked at you expectantly.

You fumbled dumbly with the tickets in your pockets, presenting them to the attendant. You both ended up in a cherry red car lined with nice leather cushions. Natasha’s thigh was warm against yours, her thick scent coating your lungs. Her arm was around the back of the cart, and a familiar sense of safety settled within you.

“You worry about her,” Natasha said to fill the silence as they loaded each cart. It lurched forward and back, making your stomach turn. “I didn’t start speaking until I was nine years old. My mother, she was so concerned that she rushed to be every specialist that money could buy. Whole days spent driving to different counties, just for them to say that same thing. Nothing is wrong, and I’ll talk when I’m ready.”

“What was that moment? The one where you were ready?”

She shrugged her shoulders. “The thing about being quiet, is that people tend not to notice when you’re in the room. My father protected Yelena and I from his world for as long as he could, but eavesdroppers hear no good of themselves, and others. I watched him give a man his last drink before shooting him between the eyes.”

“Fuck, Natasha.” You murmured.

“He doesn’t know I saw that. I ran as quietly as I could back to my room and hid under the duvet like a child. Something snapped in me that day and I no longer wanted to be silent. I suppose the fear of displeasing either of them ebbed the words from me.”

She was being vulnerable in front of you, a side that you had never seen. There were always her subtle touches, and her purred words that would hit the pit of your stomach. You’d watch as she gave unwavering commands to Clint, to Yelena and Kate. But this was different. This was her.

The city sparkled around you. Tricolored lights reflected off the blackness of the causeways that lapped listlessly at the harbor. If you squinted, you could almost make out the mansion where you spent most of your time.

The carnival buzzed below. Her scent was overwhelming, so warm and welcoming despite her danger. And dangerous she was. It was alluring, exciting. You looked at her, eyes pouring with emotion. Not so much pity, as she would snap your wrist at the fact. But a simple understanding.

Tentatively, you reached up and cupped her cheek. You both were too far above the ground to be realized and the simple gesture was one of good faith. Surprisingly, she leaned into your touch, making a quiet, relieved noise.

Your voice was whispered, “You didn’t deserve that. You were just a kid.”

She had closed her eyes, reveling in the warmth of your contact. Her features were so soft, so broken in this moment that you resisted the urge to kiss her frown away. Before you could contemplate it, the Ferris Wheel lurched and she gently took her fingers and wrapped them around your wrist, lowering both of your hands into her lap.

“She’ll talk,” Natasha gave your hand a squeeze “give her time.”

Natasha cleared her throat as the cart neared the end of its journey. She pulled away entirely, her arm still along the back of the seat. When she leaned closer, you could feel the weight of the gun in the inside pocket of her jacket. Seriousness had lidded over her eyes once more.

“We have a job tonight, and I want you to come along.” She said, breath hot on your collarbone.

You were suddenly snapped back to reality. Natasha was in fact the head of a crime ring that you had unwittingly stumbled into. Up until now, aside from the brutal beating, it had almost felt like child’s play. She’d relearned you how to shoot, and you knew the very basics of fighting. But, you were far from her Winter Soldier stand in. You weren’t even a toy soldier.

She sensed your hesitancy. “I have a meeting at a restaurant downtown. It’s not going to go south, but if it does, I need you there. You won’t be alone.”

“Clint?” You asked.

She shook her head “guys got a family of his own, he must spend some time with them outside of work hours. Kate.”

You fought back the noise that threatened to escape your throat. You didn’t doubt Kate, but you certainly doubted yourself. You didn’t have your own weapon, and the threat of leaving a restaurant with a bullet lodged between your ribs became very real, very quickly.

She chuckled at that, “I trust her. I trust you. Just stand there and follow her lead. Look hot and intimidating.”

“Is hot really a requirement?”

“Not really, but you pull it off.” There was a switch in her again, one that had been flipped effortlessly as she grabbed the collar of your sweater and pulled you impossibly close. You were nearly sitting in her lap. “Don’t fail me on this, y/n. It’s imperative that you do as you’re told.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

You swallowed thickly as her hands wandered your side expertly. It took you a moment to realize that she had pulled the gun from her own coat and silently transferred it to yours before she released her hold on you. You had admit that you missed the touch instantly.

She stood from the cart when the attendant unlocked the door, reaching her hand out to you. You took it was ease, letting her help you onto the metal dismount. There were no words exchanged as you readjusted the weapon as slyly as you could muster, hands shoved into your pockets a moment later.

“I don’t know what to tell you, dude.” You could hear Darcy’s voice from within the crowds. It was easy to spot them, and you swore you saw the ghost of a smile on Natasha’s face. “The kid kicked both of our asses. Split the difference and pay up.”

“Yeah, fine.” Clint fished out his wallet and placed a couple of bills in Darcy’s waiting palm. “The price of carnival food these days is outrageous.”

Kate had presented you with a leather holster that fit snuggly around your chest and abdomen. She’d tightened the straps, your arms halfway raised. It felt a bit like a dressing room at the mall, her breath hot on your cheek as she tugged the center strap to make sure it was secure.

“Natasha likes us to be presentable.” She handed you a dark jacket to throw over the contraption. “Inconspicuous and deadly. But still presentable.”

You followed Kate’s lead. Natasha was to drive to the restaurant, and the two of you were to follow in a separate car. It was important to stay quiet unless you were spoken to directly by Natasha. Kate seemed at ease on the ride over, drumming her fingers against the steering wheel to an incoherent pop song.

The holster pinched you uncomfortably, but you were so deep into your own fear, your own reluctance, to pay much attention. Kate shot you a look, hard in her nature, and then softer when she glanced at you a second time.

“You’re much too tense” she flicked off the radio, delving you into a comfortable silence. “Lower your shoulders and relax. It’ll be an uneventful night.”

“Right,” you let out a shaky breath “uneventful.”

“Look, I can’t imagine how jarring this is for you. I would have shut down by now, changed my name and gone into witness protection if I was thrown into this life the way you are. Without a choice. But, we can make the best of it and do what we can to protect Natasha.”

“It seems like she can handle herself,”

Kate chuckled “Oh, she can. But she doesn’t keep us around just for protection. It’s a big city, she wants people she trusts. She wants a family. And I know it might not seem like it, but her welcoming you into her inner circle… it’s a blessing. Just like we’d go to bat for her, she’d do the same for us.”

You swallowed the dryness in your throat as Natasha pulled her car to the curb in front of a russet brick building. Kate did the same expertly, shutting off the engine. She clapped you on the shoulder, giving you one more encouraging smile. “One night at a time, y/n. Follow my lead.”

Kate opened the door for Natasha, and you had to keep your jaw from dropping on the ground at the sight of her. Her long leg stretched onto the sidewalk, her hand squeezing Kate’s in return as she helped her from the vehicle.

She wore a maroon dress, one that had a slit down the leg that left little to the imagination. The color matched the shirt Kate had given you earlier, everything orchestrated to a tee. The woman looked at you approvingly before she took striding steps towards the front of the building. Out of habit, you held the door open for you, another look sparkling in her dark eyes.

It was a restaurant that you had never set foot in. There was a sour, yet pleasant, scent of vinegar and cabbage masked with that of freshly baked bread and beef. The walls were painted deep green, black and white photos of rolling hills placed above empty tables.

It was clear what table you were to be led to. There was one in the center of the restaurant that was set up with a bottle of wine, and water. A candle burned in the middle, shading the woman who occupied it with shadows that stretched her delicate features. She wasn’t alone.

The woman had cropped blonde hair at the shoulders. Her hazel eyes were calculating, clocking Kate and yourself immediately. Kate pulled Natasha’s chair back, allowing her to sit before she took a step back. You flanked her sides, arms behind your back and stare trained straight ahead like a sentinel.

“Two,” the woman smiled devilishly, hiding it behind a glass of deep red wine. “Are you compensating for something, or someone?”

The woman who stood much like you did behind her boss was not masking her contempt towards you. She was familiar in an irking way that you paid no mind to. It was in passing, you were sure, but it was one of those itches that would worsen until you could scratch it with your whole hand.

“Not at all,” Natasha replied cooly, “I believe there was something you wanted to discuss?”

“Mm, there was. You know the Maroni property on the west side.” She leaned forward, placing her glass down. Her lips were stained in a dark red that matched Natasha’s dress. “I want it.”

“That’s a horrible way to say please.”

“Natasha, we both know it doesn’t serve you in it’s current position.” She put emphasis on the name.

“I fail to see how that matters. Just giving you the property is out of the question. That’s not how this works, but I do admire your gumption.”

“Then how exactly does, this work?” She narrowed her eyes and leaned forward. Both you and Kate tensed. The vaguely-familiar woman behind Carol shifted on her feet in the slightest movement. “You kill one of my men and offer nothing in return?”

Natasha lifted her eyebrows “Exactly. This isn’t a bartering system, and it never has been. If I give you this building, it will change everything and I’m not much in the mood for a power struggle. What do you need it for?”

She seemed to falter “I don’t have to answer that. I’m offering to buy the property from you.”

“It’s not for sale.”

There was finality in her voice that rocked the room into silence. She hadn’t touched her wine, nor her water, and you figured she wouldn’t. Carol glowered at her, clearly not used to having her endeavors squashed with such ferocity.  

Natasha took a steadying breath. “Is that all? It’s late and I’m tired of your graveling.”

She let out a sigh and crossed her legs, drumming her ringed fingers on the cloth-laid table. The flames in the candle seemed to react to her impatience. Kate’s jaw clenched and unclenched as she leveled the woman behind Carol with a fierce stare.

“I suppose. I want you to remember this moment, Natasha. I offered you a deal.” She stood and dramatically sighed once more. “This could have been easy.”

Kate always kept her eyes on Carol, on the woman who followed behind her with her hands shoved into her pockets. The darkness of a previous scar littered her collarbone. She had the same stare that Bucky had, that same determined anger that came with years of meetings with higher stakes than this.

“Oh, and Nat.” She stopped just short of the door, turning to face the three of you.

Kate reached for her weapon, and out of a blind trust, so had you. It was warm from its housed place against your side. In that moment, you knew that anyone else in the room would be a quicker shot than you. Still, your heart was beating quickly in your throat.

“I don’t know where your Winter Soldier is, but this is a sorry excuse for a replacement.” She laughed, a mean sound. “A kid and a burn-out… you should’ve taken the deal.”

She left without another word, leaving you in a chilling silence. For a few long moments, Natasha stared at the table, at her reflection in the syrupy red wine. Her fingers brushed against the glass, frowning.

“I’m twenty-three.” Kate let out in a single breath, eyes drifting from you.

“Don’t look at me,” You whispered back, “I am a burn-out.”

[Taglist🕷♡: @dumbasslesbi, @lostremind, @toocreativeforausername @autorasexy @eringranola @mikookaaaaaao @marvelwoman-simp @pacmanmiles @mostlymarvelsstuff, @mrsrushman, @milfsandtittyenthusiast, @random-raccoon4, @ravenromanova, @mysticalmoonlight7, @ahintofchaos @cowboyboots236 @lissaaaa145]

[impactedfates]

Hello there!! Can I request some headcanons / mini-scenarios for: Dan Heng, March, Welt, Himeko, Yanqing and Jing Yuan; with a normally soft-spoken Reader who has a wide vocal range (from contralto to hitting those high notes) and occasionally does song covers? Doesn't matter the genre, so long as Reader likes it.

So they might hear Reader singing something like a lullaby or a traditional Xianzhou song one day, to something that's still soft and sweet like a mainstream pop song on another day; to belting out something like "Kakusei" or "NEXUS" from the Promare OST. :D

★ A/N: I understood the request, I just hope I wrote it in a way you wanted! People with such a large vocal range are so talented istg, they gotta teach me. (I say as if I have ANY confidence to sing anyways)

☆ Genre/Trope: Platonic

★ Format: Bullet Pointed Head Cannons (And small scenario at the end :>)

☆ Warnings: None

★ Extra: Reader is a Nameless // Readers age is undisclosed so imagine them at whatever age you wish // Reader can play instruments! // Characters might be OOC I feel // Proof Read but I did it when it was 4am lmao

When you sing more soft songs, Dan Heng tends to enjoy listening. It helps him feel more relax and sometimes rids his mind of nightmares.

He's more used to hearing that kind of voice from you. So when one day, he walks in on you singing a song that's the exact opposite of how you usually sing, he's a bit surprised.

He never doubted you could have a big vocal range, however hearing you sing a song that's different to how he normally hears you sing is what surprised him.

He still enjoys listening, but more so when you sing in a softer voice, don't get him wrong. He still enjoys your singing voice and will support you. But he isn't one for a more loud song.

"[Name]...if you're going to sing more...on the loud side, could I request you do it else where?" Dan Heng sighs softly, being awoken up once again due to you. Despite his words hinting at annoyance, his facial expression was soft and kind. A soft sorry came from your voice as you quickly turned off the music you were using, switching to a more softer song. An old Xianzhou lullaby. "Here, I'll make it up to you. Sit on the couch and I'll sing a softer song" You smiled, Dan Heng chuckled as he obliged. He can't deny that your more softer voice doesn't help him fall asleep. He silently hums along to your voice, and in a sleepy voice he speaks to you before drifting to bed. "If you enjoy music like that so much, we can pay a visit to Serval okay?"

March 7th LOVES your singing voice. She would sing along to whatever song you were singing. She praises you every time she hears you and likely took photos of you singing.

She so supports you if you ever make a YouTube (StarTube?) account and posted covers, literally your number 1 fan.

When you post a cover of a song, she's always the first one to like, comment and listen!

When you post a cover of a song that's VERY different. (Let's say, Usseewa) and you hit ALL those high notes and, everything omg. She was surprised but immediately hyped you up.

She doesn't mind if you sing songs like that at all, your singing is amazing. Like I said, number 1 fan...she doesn't hid it either.

"I love you [Name]!" "Uh, the one with the blue camera and pink hair?" "OH. MY GOD. [NAME] YOU NOTICED ME, YOU NOTICED ME. I.LOVE.YOU" Serval laughed out loud seeing Marchs outburst, as if you two don't live with each other. You could only look away with a small smile, seeing March jump up and down and shaking whoever was beside her. Much to Welts "delight"

Welts very impressed with your vocal range. But he's also worried, he knows that if you were able too have a large vocal range, you likely know how to manage it.

Still, anytime he hears you singing songs like NEXUS or Kakusei he can't help but slide over a bottle of water for your throat.

If you ever join a concert with Serval then he IS buying tickets, though not everyone may go (Dan Heng) he and the rest of the Express will.

He also tends to buy any merch you may come out with if there is any. (Mainly for March but he does keep one or two for himself to support you)

He doesn't really have a preference when it comes too what songs you sing, just as long as your happy and it isn't really disturbing anyone.

If you ever start a StarTube channel, he might animate a few of your covers! Under a pen name though, he's not embarrassed, but I think he'd like it if you thought it was a different fan and not just him who's already liked your singing from the start. (If that makes sense)

"WELT! Weltweltwelt" You ran up to him, quickly showing him an animation someone did of one of your new songs. "ArahatosNumber1Fan animated one of my covers again" You said excitedly, bringing the phone screen back to your view as you scrolled through the comments. Many complimenting the animation but many also asking who sang the cover to which they were directed to your account. "This the guy that you said was helping boost your channel subs?" You nod happily, tapping your chin you thought for a bit. "Do you think they'd still animate my covers even if I sing a different genre? I want to go with something softer this time instead of a louder peice" "I'm sure they'll animate any song you wish to sing" He chuckles. And sure enough, a week after you posted a cover of Lost Umbrella, ArahatosNumber1Fan posted an animation to go along with it.

Himeko compliments you a lot for your vocal range. In fact, she got you a karaoke machine for your birthday! Of course, though. She doesn't let you use it during night time. She doesn't want to wake up because you decided to start singing Churira Churira Dadada at 3 in the morning.

I do think she prefers you to sing outside the train. While she does enjoying your singing and she has no problem if you were to sing in the train. However she also understands it may disturb many people so she does ask for you to sing in an area where you aren't disturbing anyone.

I feel like she also asks you to teach her how to sing or have a wider vocal range. She enjoys singing herself and would love to join in when you're out singing to keep you company!

Perhaps you two can make money by singing on the streets :> (Only if you're okay with it though!)

You strummed you guitar as the two of you reached the last note, Himeko took a small bow and looked up at the audience that had gathered around. All of them clapping and complimenting your voice. She laughed softly and gently packed up your things so the two of you could get going, checking to see if you were uncomfortable with the attention before she directs you back to the train. As you two entered, Himeko was quick to sit and count the amount of credits that were left in your guitar case, looking up to you she said with a smile. "A success, well done. They loved you" "It wasn't just me singing..." "Perhaps but...I'd say they have their favourites"

When Yanqing overhears you singing Xianzhou lullabys, he's quick to shower you with compliments. Your voice is so soothing! He could listen it for so long and it's effective too. You had to usher him out as he could wake the kids you just put to bed.

When he hears you singing a song like (man I'm running out of songs I know/hj) Noels Lament. He's impressed, how can you sing a song so softly and quietly and then sing something like this which needs a stronger voice??

He might skip a few of his training to find you and see what song you're singing, he makes it a guessing game! Will you be singing something so sweet and kind? Or something that might will make head turn??

"...Yanqing?" "Ha! I guessed right this time" "...Guessed...right?" Ah, you weren't meant to know the guessing game he had in his own head, quickly, he shuffled away. Scratching the back of his head. "Of where you were!" "I always walk in this area" "...I meant...what outfit you'd be wearing?" "I usually wear similar clothes?" ...Yeah, he's running off quickly, hopefully Jing Yuan won't scold him for skipping his training again right? Surely the general can understand he just has to see if his guess was right or not.

Surprisingly (or not surprisingly) Jing Yuan enjoys when you sing your heart out with songs like Candy Store or Mount Rageous. That's the type of sing he first heard you sing when he tried to find Yanqing when he skipped yet another training sessions.

Usually he would just sleep till Yanqing returned or just go on with his day if he never did. In either case, now he joins Yanqing to see what song you're singing before returning back to train.

When he hears you singing a less upbeat song like Sweet Dreams. He's slightly surprised but listens intently, it's different to what he often hears you sing but he enjoys it none the less, he sees your happy so he's fine.

He might even request to hear certain songs just to see how well you voice range can handle it. From the loudest song that could break glass, to a soothing song that can put even the mara struck to bed. And if you successfully sing them all, he congratulates you.

Overall, he's impressed as well as many others, likely talks to you and how well you sing to his friends.

You panted a bit as you finished a particularly long high note, Jing Yuan chuckles and slides over a cup of water which you accept quickly. Taking a drink to sooth your throat. "You voice really can do wonders, I'm more then impressed" He speaks, you nodded in response as he then offers a small treat for agreeing to sing a song for him. A song that made you go from high to low, soft to loud and all in all, tested how wide your voice range can be in a singular song. "I must apologies, I just wished to see how far your voice can go. I should've considered how tired your throat must be from singing that particular song" "No worries, it was fun to read and practice that song. I'm a bit surprised you know it though" "Oh? Are you now?" "Yeah...I mean...the song was released like a month ago and you're kinda a grandp-" "Alright I get it" He chuckled lightly, gently flicking your forehead.

I'm so smart writing Yanqings and JY sleep deprived right?/j Yeah uh they might be OOC, hopefully not thoughejfpgt.

[accirax]

Elliot Cuevas Lore Check (Yoidoreshirazu MV Analysis)

After the intellectuals in our community had the thought to check the description of DRDTdev’s latest MV masterpiece, one fact became pretty clear: DRDT’s sparkly new MV is not fronted by one of our main cast of sixteen, or even a particularly pre-established side character. Instead, it’s time for Elliot Cuevas to take the stage, and bring with him a lot of questions ranging from “wait, that’s what he looks like?” to “wait, is the killing game predicated on a basis of lies?!” There’s… a lot running through my mind right now, and I see no better way to process it than to start answering the questions that I and others may have as best I can through a theory post. I’m living!

And when I say “answering the questions,” I mean that quite literally. I think that the best way to frame this analysis is to divide it into headlining questions, and tackle what we know and what we can learn piece by piece. Therefore, I think the most obvious question we can start with is:

#1: Who is Elliot Cuevas?

We don’t have a ton of information about the guy, but I’ve tried to compile what we do. By far the most information we’d gotten on Ellie prior to this MV was from the Chapter 2 Part 1 Q&A, where DRDTdev described a little about all of the major siblings we’d heard of so far. Here’s what DRDTdev said:

So, we know that Elliot was given the nickname “Ellie” (and presumably likes it, given that he’s credited in the MV as “Ellie”), and he looks really similar to Charles, which we also saw in the MV. Given how similar he looks to Charles, I’m going to assume that they’re biological brothers, which would make Ellie hispanic/latino. Similarly, I’m assuming that he identifies as male, due to his use of he/him pronouns and the term “brother” being applied to him. He likes pancakes and dogs, which… we’ll get back to later. Charles is stated to be 18+ at the start of Despair Time, which would make Ellie 29-32+ if he were alive today. Which… huh. Is he?

#2: Is Ellie alive?

The belief that Ellie is dead isn’t just a popular headcanon that metamorphosed into “fact”– his death is directly referenced in the text in the form of Charles’ secret. Your older brother, Elliot, died.

However, this MV does make it tempting to believe that Ellie could be alive, so let’s give it the benefit of the doubt for a moment. If Ellie is alive, there are two sets of two questions to consider.

Question #1: If Ellie is alive, why did people think he died?

Ellie was in a life threatening scenario that people believed he didn’t escape from, but he did. After this, he either took the opportunity to disappear, or something prevented him from reuniting with his loved ones.

Ellie did die, and the DRDT universe contains some sort of necromantic magic or time travel properties that could bring him back to life.

Question #2: If Ellie is alive, why does the secret say that he’s dead?

Whoever wrote the secrets (likely the mastermind) did so intending to tell the truth. They learned the information from a source that led them to believe that Ellie had died, and if Ellie turned up alive, they would be just as surprised as everyone else.

Whoever wrote the secrets (likely the mastermind) did so intending to lie. They knew that Ellie was really alive, and included his “death” in the secret just to fuck with Charles. This could also imply that other students’ secrets incorporate some level of lies.

If Ellie is alive, I think that the #1 situation is more likely for both questions.

If Ellie is dead, we don’t know exactly when his death happened. Given that Charles cites it under the umbrella of “childhood amnesia,” we can pin Ellie’s hypothetical death down to a time when Charles was a child. The National Institute of Health defines childhood as 3-11 years old. So, if Ellie died when Charles was 3-11, it would mean Ellie’s age of death would fall between 14 and 23.

I made this little moodboard to try to piece together around what age Ellie might be depicted as in the MV based on how DRDTdev has drawn people of various ages before. This is important under the assumption that Ellie canonically looked like this at some point during his life. ‘Cause (picking obviously wrong numbers here), if Ellie had died when he was, like, 2, it’d be weird if the MV showed him when he was, like, 50, right?

Allow me to take a little detour to discuss the Nageishi sisters and establish their ages. I initially ballparked Arei’s age as around 13 in that picture, which would have made her sisters (who are 2-5 years older than her) 15-18. However, there’s some actual evidence we can pull upon to clarify when that image might have come from.

In Arei and J’s FTE, J says that Arei “definitely [*was*] a highschool bully,” and Arei confirms that she was “the queen of her school.” Assuming that these two are to be believed, we can estimate based on the average age at which an American enters high school as a freshman that Arei has been a bully since at least around 14. While I don’t necessarily expect that Arei came in and became the queen bee on the first day of freshman year, it certainly would have been easier to establish her reign if the other students hadn’t previously seen her being bullied and tortured for a year or so beforehand. Therefore, Arei is probably in a maximum of eighth grade (12-13) in that image, so that she would have had enough time to sabotage her sisters before entering high school.

Additionally, although it isn’t stated in the secret the killing game handed out, Arei confesses to David and Teruko that she “got [her sisters] unlawfully sent to reform school.” Through a bit of googling, I learned that many reform schools cap out at about 16-17 years old, although it’s impossible to confirm that without knowing which state Arei grew up in. If that’s the case, then Fuyuko and Natsuko could only be a maximum of 17 years old, which is in the same sort of age range as Arei being a maximum of 15 in that picture. However, I don’t know if the Nageishi parents/the government would find it too useful to send the sisters to reform school for only one year, so it seems more likely that they’re younger than that in the picture. I might ballpark that Arei is 12 and Fuyuko and Natsuko are 15 in the picture.

Anyways, I think we can definitely rule out the possibility of Ellie dying when Charles was on the lower end of the age spectrum. He looks way older than any of the characters drawn “when they were kids”, and notably older than Arei as well. To me, he also looks older than Ryan, meaning he probably reached the age of an 18+ adult.

Unfortunately, there’s a really large age range that’s gone undepicted between the “18+” killing game participants and Mariabella, the only “parent-aged” adult we’ve seen so far. I would probably put Ellie’s appearance between the two, but it’s also possible that his unkempt hair and eyebags are making him look older than he actually was, a la Syobai Hashimoto of SDRA2 (the link is a spoiler-free picture of him). Syobai’s exact age is unknown, but generally young, yet many people think he’s an old man when they first see him. That phenomenon could be going on with Ellie as well.

If he is, we’ll say, 20 or older, though, there’s a limited number of ages he could have died at that would still fall within Charles’ childhood. If Ellie died, he did so when Charles was in the 8-11 kind of age range. Otherwise, for Ellie to reach the age he’s shown at in the MV, he probably survived to grow older than Charles’ family last remembers him. I think Ellie’s death is probably more likely, but, hey, that means we’ve narrowed down the period in which Charles could have acquired his childhood amnesia. That’s something!

#3: How does Charles feel about Ellie?

Well, okay. Obviously, in the current day, Charles doesn’t know who Ellie is, and therefore probably doesn’t have any strong feelings about him other than confusion. But, before Charles forgot about him, what was Charles’ opinion?

I actually thought that Charles really admiring Ellie was a canon fact, but looking back at it, I don’t think it was ever directly stated. That said, there are several reasons why I thought that their relationship was a positive one.

Told you we’d come back to Ellie liking pancakes! I’m sure it’s not a coincidence that, when Charles thinks of what he’d like to learn how to cook, he comes up with Ellie’s favorite food. It could be that Ellie used to make pancakes for Charles, or that they simply used to go out and get pancakes together, but Charles clearly has some sort of repressed memories about pancakes with his brother that makes him want to seek them out again.

We already knew that Charles and Ellie were known to look very alike, and this MV confirmed that was true, down to the length of their hair. If Charles didn’t like Ellie, he easily could have kept his hair short, like the haircut he had as a child, as a way to make them look less similar. However, Charles is very attached to keeping his hair in a long ponytail, just as Ellie wears it. That implies to me that Charles saw Ellie as enough of a role model to seek replicating the image of his brother through his own style even when he doesn’t remember that Ellie existed. That’s powerful.

#4: Why does Ellie look… like that?

Now this is a point that I’m still confused about. Charles’ affluent backstory has been alluded to multiple times. Both his inability to do his own laundry and his lack of knowledge in the kitchen imply that he had people to cook and clean for him. It’s possible that Charles’ parents were the ones doing that for him (which implies some level of wealth, but not so much as living in a house full of butlers and maids), but the general vibe I’ve gotten is that Charles’ family was well-off enough that they hired help.

If we assume that Charles and Ellie are biological brothers who spent enough time together to form a notable bond, it really seems like they would have grown up in the same household for both of their youths, together. So then, what gives with Ellie’s appearance? The patched up jacket, blemished face, and basic cigarette don’t match at all with the pristine white mansion with hedges that many might imagine for Charles. How would that have played out?

Option A: Ellie was the family’s rebellious wild child

I’m having trouble coming up with good examples, but there’s definitely a trope out there of a big brother character who’s a bit of a rude rebel, but still a pure-hearted dreamer that their younger sibling(s) can really look up to. Ellie was just the member of the uptight Cuevas family that couldn’t be tamed, no matter how hard his parents tried to cramp his thrifty style or stop him from going out and partying(?).

Notably, this option is quite confusing for Charles. Even if this figure is considered the typical epitome of cool, I don’t know if it’s someone who Charles would really gel with. As a child, Charles is depicted as pretty wide-eyed and innocent with his adorable little bubbles. I’m not saying that that kind of kid couldn’t come to idolize their rockstar big bro– just that, if they did, they probably wouldn’t turn out like Charles. Still, it could be an opposites attract situation, or perhaps forgetting Ellie and the ensuing trauma changed Charles more than we would have expected.

This interpretation is also… a bit of a leap, considering what we’ve seen of Ellie.

Like, these are not particularly the expressions of a thrill-seeking party animal who loves to crack open a cold one with the boys. Most of his expressions look wary, scary, or contemplative, and even the two that are smiling are doing so in more of a wry/teasing way. Fun-loving scamp Ellie might fit the way he’s styled his body, but not so much the expressions on his face. Perhaps the characterization was a little off?

Option B: Ellie was the family’s edgy black sheep

Instead of Ellie’s cigarette and messy ponytail implying that he’s supposed to be punk and cool, perhaps they’re meant to indicate that he was more emo and nihilistic. I don’t imagine that the Cuevas household would’ve liked this too much either, but it’s still a plausible way for a privileged teen to rebel against his family system. This kind of attitude matches more with the range of expressions we can gather from Yoidoreshirazu.

However, if it would be hard for Charles to relate to the last guy, I have no idea what Charles would be doing looking up to this guy. Maybe if their one-on-one moments showed Charles the soft heart behind Ellie’s tough exterior, Charles would’ve come to appreciate his perspective on life…? Yeah, I don’t really imagine these two enjoying a plate of pancakes together, either. Also, this would have been when Charles was, like, a kindergartener.

But if that’s the case, what then? Is my image of the Cuevas household just totally off? Or is this version of Ellie not compatible with the Cuevas household at all?

Option C: Ellie was kicked out of his family and left for dead

Especially in front of the grimy brick background and neon street sign, Ellie’s worse-for-wear appearance did make me think that this image of him could have been taken from a time when Ellie was without a home and living on the streets. As in, this look was never associated with the Cuevas household at all.

This option has some definite appeal because it allows a lot more flexibility from Ellie’s personality before he was kicked out. He could have been a stand-up guy, smart like Charles and a great mentor too, and only have adopted his more dour personality once he was kicked out of home. There are plenty of reasons why someone could be disowned that don’t (necessarily) reflect poorly on their character: Google lists being LGBTQ+, dating someone of a different race or religion, getting someone pregnant, or not following the profession your parents wanted for you as possibilities, depending on who the parents are and what they believe.

Any interpretation where the Cuevas parents are somewhat ashamed of Ellie would also help to rationalize why Mr. and Mrs. Cuevas lied to Charles about being an only sibling. If they really loved Ellie, they might have tried to bridge the subject with Charles one day, and not let the memory of their elder son fade into history. If he was someone they didn’t want to associate with in the first place, covering up his death would have been much more emotionally viable.

So, if the Cuevas parents are the kind of people to disown their kid for less-than-fair reasons, Ellie could have still been the kind of treasured big brother figure to Charles one might have expected while also getting kicked to the curb. However, this option raises the definite question of… how did Ellie’s death happen?

On the surface, that might seem like a strange question. Sadly, homeless people in the United States have an average life span that’s 17.5 years shorter than the average housed person’s life span, and the number of deaths have only been increasing in recent years. Especially in a civilization that was once home to the biggest, most awful, most tragic event in human history, trying to survive without a home might be quite difficult. 

All that doesn’t really apply to Ellie, though, because we have a pretty decent lead on how he died: dog attack.

Even if he might not remember why, Charles dislikes dogs, and has a remnant of that turbulent relationship etched into his very skin. Ellie actually likes dogs, an interesting point of contrast, but one that makes it clear that dogs are important to Charles’ backstory in some manner. I and others have then speculated that the attack in which Charles got that scar on his arm may have been the time at which Ellie died. Both events– the attack that created the scar and Ellie’s passing– were erased by his childhood amnesia.

The story would play out as something along the lines of “Ellie and Charles used to both really love dogs, and were approached by a dog one day. However, that dog was feral, and attacked Charles. He was bitten on the arm before Ellie told Charles to run as Ellie stayed behind to protect his brother. However, Ellie couldn’t fend off the dog himself, and was instead mauled to death. Charles escaped with an injured arm and a head full of trauma that would cause him to fully erase the memory of his brother from his mind.” Don’t know how feasible that exact scenario is, but I always imagined it as something like that.

So, if Ellie was living on the street at the time of his death, how would the two of them have come together for the dog to attack? Maybe Charles could have been visiting Ellie on his own, but, again, he would have been 8-11 years old at the time. Would the 8-11 year old Charles have really had the means or motive to set out alone to see his brother, and would the Cuevas family have really let their elementary school-aged son wander off into the streets alone?

Then there’s the issue of Ellie’s age again. Look. I’m not trying to say that every 23 year old should be able to 1v1 a feral dog in a fight. I’m 23, and if I had to fight a street dog to the death, I would probably lose! However, while I am a quiet nerd who likes to write thousand word essays about anime video game fanfiction characters in her free time, Ellie seems like a fairly athletic young man. If he looks like Charles, he’s also probably around Charles’ height of 5’9”. Plus, it probably didn’t have to be to the death. Couldn’t Ellie have used those long legs to run away, or his human hands to make an improvised weapon, or something? To me, it feels much more plausible for Ellie to have been killed in a dog attack if he were also a child/teen when it happened. But, that should be incompatible with his appearance in the MV. Unless–

Option D: Ellie became this way… after he was “dead”?

Wait, what? No, wait, I thought I had already determined that Ellie was dead! What do you mean it might ACTUALLY MAKE MORE SENSE IF HE WAS ALIVE??? WHAT HAS THIS MV COME TO?! AAAAAAAAAA–

Well. If this version of Ellie is what he “became” after he faked his death (or had it faked for him), certain elements start to line up. There is no conflict with the Cuevas family, because Ellie’s personality could have been completely different than what we see in Yoidoreshirazu. Similarly, we don’t have to solve why Charles would have built such a bond with this guy because this guy may not have existed when he was interacting with Charles. The brothers growing up in a household together would make it considerably easier for them both to encounter a mean dog at the same time. And, if Ellie didn’t have to reach this 20+ age before he disappeared from Charles’ life, the whole story could have been set much earlier, such that Ellie could have been fending the dog off when he was more of a kid or teen himself. Then, being separated from his family and presumed dead is what caused Ellie to lose his faith in life, take up his smoking habit, and hardly be able to sleep or smile.

This could still involve him being forced to live on the streets, although I would then wonder why he didn’t ever try to get back in contact with his family. Maybe he did and they turned him away? But, if he was an admirable son, I see no reason why they would do that. Perhaps he had expressed a bit more discontentment with the Cuevas family prior, and decided that, given this opportunity, it was for the best to sever his ties with them? That seems like a pretty extreme decision to keep up with given the state that Ellie seems to have wound up in, and would call into question how much Ellie cared about Charles if he was so willing to leave him behind.

It would kind of make more sense to me if, in this scenario, an outside force was stopping Ellie from reuniting with his family– for instance, if XF-Ture Tech offered Ellie a deal like they did to Min (somewhat forcing his hand), which included that he could never contact his family again. That could certainly make Ellie more important to the plot moving forward, and explain part of why he even got this MV. But, what would XF-Ture Tech want to do with some kid who was just near-fatally mauled by a dog attack? An near-fatal attack that… he doesn’t even seem to have scars on his face, neck, or right hand from???

Option E: this is how ellie looks in heaven or hell or whatever i don’t freakin know

Some of you may have been screaming at me the entire time that Ellie’s design may not be “canon,” so to speak, and you know what? That’s valid. It could simply be a projection of what Ellie could have looked like if he’d ever grown to this point in age, or his appearance may have been modified to better match Gumi’s disheveled vibe in the original Yoidoreshirazu MV, and not reflect his true personality. Ellie and Gumi do have really similar poses, cigarettes and all.

However, it would seem a little odd to me to give the audience what’s basically an AU design of Ellie before we got the original version. That would lead to insanely wrong conclusions like what I just wrote above if true, which could potentially cause people to interpret future content incorrectly. That’s not good. Besides, the song was still chosen for Ellie, and the song carries the same sort of gritty, nightlife vibe that the Gumi design does. Could the lyrics of the song really fit Ellie so well that the entire energy of the song and appearance of the MV could be waived?

#5: What’s up with these lyrics?

Sigh. I hate to move on to the next talking point when I haven’t yet resolved what we were last discussing, but, to be honest, I don’t know if I can resolve why Ellie looks and acts like that with the information we currently have. I’m kind of banking on the lyrics swaying me in the right direction when it comes to that interpretation, but given that I’m probably going to have to reverse engineer a lot of the lyrics’ meaning, I don’t have high hopes.

Well, we’ve already seen how I think these lyrics would apply to Rose, so how do I think they would fit Ellie? More questions ahead, but please note that I may be taking certain lyrics more specifically than they’re meant to be interpreted. I don’t have much else to go off of, so for the sake of gaining pretty much any knowledge I kinda have to assume the lyrics are total slam dunks.

#6: What can we learn about Ellie’s personality?

I woke up as an unaware drunkard  All of this bickering goes on til the dawn comes 

Ellie wakes up and immediately begins to complain. Unless he’s bickering with himself, he isn’t alone, although that doesn’t necessarily mean he has friends. In the original song, I imagine this lyric to be more about passersby or the general state of the world, so it could be the same case for Ellie.

In Ellie’s case, it’s unclear exactly what being a “drunkard” means. It could just be the literal interpretation, where Ellie is an alcoholic. I wouldn’t know. Being a drunkard could also extend to being an addict in general— we can be pretty certain that Ellie is a smoker (unless see Option E above). It could also be that the “drunkard” part of the phrase is less important and it’s more just about being unaware. Although, that would require further interpretation for later lines like “getting drunk again and again,” and Drunkard is also half of the song’s title (“An Unaware Drunkard”). Still, Elliot could be enveloped in the same sort of general haze I described back when I gave this song to Rose. Or, he could literally just be a guy that likes to drink a lot. Either way, it gives off the impression of someone who spends more time centered in his own world than butting into others’ businesses.

The singing voices are uncountable And once one gets lost in them, they end up at your xx Hey, look at how pretty it is, the day dream rondo  I hide a thousand and can only spit out ten

More introvert coding– he really doesn’t like being in large groups of people. Ellie keeps the same pretty neutral expression throughout all of these lines in the MV, which makes it kind of hard to discern exactly what these statements mean for him. Like, is “look how pretty it is” supposed to show how he’s easily distracted by dreams and frivolous things, or how he’s using positive things to distract those around him from how he “hides a thousand and can only spit out ten”? In either case, that latter line seems to imply that Ellie is dissatisfied with whatever he’s doing in life (or death?) right now– “can only spit out” makes me think that he feels he should be doing more.

Giving in, I’m living Getting drunk again and again, unexpectedly- Ah, it's not half bad

Ah, the infamous screenshot from the presumed dead man. This smirky face gives some definite context for the attitude of these lines. Ellie seems smug or proud that he’s living… because he’s beating the death allegations? Well, it could also be that he just enjoys living a life of sin (smoking and drinking), and/or enjoys defying the expectations of the Cuevas family in this way. There’s also a certain irony to saying “I’m living” while flaunting a cigarette in his hand. Ellie may also be someone who enjoys tempting fate and defying the odds.

Ellie’s facial expressions with these lines make me believe that he actually thinks that getting drunk again and again is pretty cool, and it’s not just a deflection from a tumultuous mind. Which, again, begs the question of whether the “drinking” is literal, or a metaphor for something else. With not much other information to go off of, I’m kind of assuming it’s both at the moment. Ellie (in this state) probably is someone who drinks and enjoys doing it, but also someone who doesn’t feel any guilt over ignoring– or forgetting– his problems.

#7: Did Ellie also forget about Charles?

There are a strange number of lines in this song that could imply that Ellie isn’t just being ignorant, he’s actually forgetting about something big. That something could be the memory of his younger brother, just like how Charles forgot the memory of his elder. Runs in the family, I guess?

I woke up as an unaware drunkard

Starting at the very first line, you could begin to view the lyrics through the lens of someone who lacked information about their past: “Elliot woke up somewhere random mostly forgetting who he was in a hazy state of being.” To be clear, I’m not saying that that’s the interpretation of the line, just an interpretation of the line. It’s an interpretation that builds further connections with later lyrics, though.

And then   The sacred mountain is covered in mud, it’s smeared and chipping away, ah yes, it's not half bad 

That's my muddy, obstructed, and broken vision of the future- It’s not half bad 

These lines focus on something being damaged or broken. Ignoring the original song’s references to Mount Penglai, which are completely absent from this MV, I would interpret a character’s “sacred mountain” as their central motivation. The pursuit of this goal would be very important, or “sacred” to them, and just as majestic as it is difficult to traverse and achieve. That pairs well with Ellie losing his view of the future, as both indicate that he’s completely forgotten what his purpose in life is.

And yet, he insists that it’s not half bad. Why? The most likely reason is that, for whatever reasons made him look like this, Ellie has just adopted the same sort of fatalistic behavior as Gumi did in her MV. However, you also might not think that forgetting something was bad if you ever forgot that you forgot it. For the majority of his life, Charles hasn’t thought that forgetting Ellie was a terrible ordeal because he had no clue that Ellie even existed. For Ellie, it could be frightening to know that you’ve forgotten a lot of who you are, but also freeing. That dichotomy could be what resulted in his current pensive yet playful behavior.

Getting drunk again and again, unexpectedly- Ah, it's not half bad I'm a drunkard unaware of my rival in love, so 

I'm a drunkard unaware of the story

These lines are ones that really made me think that Ellie could have forgotten Charles in particular. I’m really not sure what “rival in love” was supposed to mean in the original song, but for Ellie, that rival being his brother makes sense. He doesn’t have a lover, as far as we’re aware, but he may have had to fight against Charles for his parents’ affections in the past. Many siblings have a competitive relationship with one another, so Charles could also be described as a rival who Ellie loves. Charles is an easy stand-in for “the story” as well, as long as we assume that the main plot of the killing game is considered “the story.” Charles is a major player in the killing game who’s already been going on a major story arc of his own, and, being Ellie’s little brother, it would make sense if Ellie’s priorities in the story were Charles-focused were he aware of the killing game.

What would it mean if Ellie had forgotten Charles, though? It seems most likely to me that, if both brothers came to forget one another, the trauma would have stemmed from the same event. But, if Charles forgot about Ellie because of that dog attack, Ellie could have only had time to forget who Charles was if he survived for long enough after the attack to have that revelation. Also, don’t know how important this is, but if the attack gave Charles childhood amnesia, would it have had the same effect on a 20+ year old man? I don’t know enough about amnesia to know if the same circumstances that would cause a child to discard their memories would also result in an adult forgetting about aspects of their life. Then again, Ellie almost certainly suffered greater damage than Charles, so any aftereffects may have been more severe.

I obviously can’t declare with 100% certainty that Ellie forgot who Charles was, nor can I even get particularly close. Still, these strange threads seemed to be too prominent to ignore, and this was the best solution I could find to them with the information we know now.

#8: Who is “you”?

Twice in Yoidoreshirazu’s lyrics does the singer reference a character as “you.”

Neglecting my happiness, I never want to sober up until it's time to listen to your voice I’m giving into you, but you don’t even have anything to say and my body is dyed

Please don't let this fleeting happiness go away, until I can lend an ear by your side I’m giving into you, but you don’t even have anything to say and my heart is dyed

This person is quite important to the singer, as the singer craves their voice and succumbs to their person, their body and soul colored by the experience. And yet, there’s a sense of isolation, as “you” refuses to say anything back to the singer. It’s a classic tale of immense devotion met with quiet rejection for Ellie to partake in with… someone. I don’t know who.

For what it’s worth, I do think the lyrics imply that this is another human person as opposed to, say alcohol. While alcohol can certainly have a profound impact on a person, causing their happiness to come and go and changing aspects of their physicality, “you” is referred to with enough human traits that it doesn’t match up. Maybe anthropomorphized alcohol could have a voice, but when has it ever needed you to listen to it? To my knowledge, lending an ear to the bottle itself is pretty unheard of.

So, is “you” Charles? That makes some sense, as Charles is the only relevant character to Ellie’s story that we know much about. Based on what we’ve already established about Ellie and Charles’ probable bond, Ellie could definitely fit the devoted older brother character in one flavor or another. But then, why would Charles have rejected him? Could be the whole childhood amnesia thing, but then Ellie would have had to exist during a period of time when Charles had already developed the amnesia and also remember who Charles was enough himself to care. Charles could have also just not liked him much, but that contradicts with the evidence presented back at Question 3.

Honestly, I don’t think Charles is “you,” despite my lack of other options. Perhaps “we” can figure this out?

worn out, we all look horrible until all thousand voices become hoarse 

Yeah, there’s also a “we” in Yoidoreshirazu, which furthers the idea that, wherever he is/was, Ellie isn’t alone. The lyrics make it unclear whether the “we” is the singer + you (and maybe others), or just the singer + others– I’d probably lean that it probably wasn’t meant to include “you” in the original, but who knows how DRDTdev chose to interpret the song. Still, as alcohol isn’t normally described as “looking horrible,” this further implies that there are other human characters referenced in Ellie’s MV. In the case of “we,” Ellie also has to associate with these people enough to include himself as part of them. He’s in a group. Why? How? When?

#9: What differences are there between this MV and the original?

This one goes out to all the people who thought to go back and check the original Literature Girl Insane MV for differences while we were dealing with that whole project! It inspired me to try the same thing here, and see what happened.

Yoidoreshirazu is a much easier task than LGI, though, because it’s a simpler song and MV on all fronts. Both MVs only portray one character, one location, and one color for the lyrics to be transcribed in. (There’s also only, like, a max of twelve words on screen at a time, unlike David’s mental library.) For the most part, the two Yoidoreshirazus are very similar. None of the lyrics were edited from Magenetra’s translation on the vocaloid lyrics wiki, the lights turn on and off at the same times, and the DRDT version doesn’t appear to include any additional puzzles or easter eggs. Still, they aren’t exactly the same, so I’ll write out the differences I found playing them side by side for both my own and others’ purposes.

Gumi is on screen at the start, then quickly disappears and comes back, while it takes Ellie until the lyrics start to appear.

Not much extra to explain on this point. It may indicate that Ellie was missing or absent for a longer period of time, or at least that he’s more mysterious/quiet than Yoidoreshirazu’s Gumi.

Gumi has her tongue out a lot more at the beginning of the song.

Before Ellie takes off his hood (so, basically for the first half of the song), he only sticks his tongue out for one part of the song, from 0:52 (“getting drunk again and again”) to 0:59 (“my rival in love”). Meanwhile, Gumi has her tongue out from the moment the lyrics start (0:09, “I woke up as an unaware drunkard”) to the end of the first stanza (0:25, “all thousand voices become hoarse”), and then does it again from 0:43 to 0:59, the entirety of the first chorus (“the sacred mountain” to “rival in love”). This gives Gumi the appearance of being more rebellious, while Ellie is more moody.

Gumi smiles a lot more than Ellie.

When Gumi returns from the first chorus (1:00), she’s already smiling. While she shifts from a satisfied smirk to a smug grin to an enraptured beam to a content smile, she doesn’t actually stop smiling from the minute mark on until the vocals stop (2:10). Meanwhile, Ellie doesn’t smile at all until 1:50, and drops the playful tongue-out expression after a mere six seconds. The only lines that Ellie smiles for are “I’m living / Getting drunk again and again– Ah, it’s not half bad,” which is quite interesting. The overall result is the same as the bullet point above; that Gumi is at least better at pretending to be happy while Ellie is lost in his sorrows.

Ellie and Gumi’s expressions are pretty different in general.

Here are all of Ellie’s expressions versus all of Gumi’s expressions. In the end, Gumi actually had more expressions, which I wasn’t expecting. Some of their faces are mirrors to each other, while others are different.

Both Ellie and Gumi have a serious eyes closed face, a bored/neutral face, a bored tongue-out face, a scary face with big eyes, and a sleazy grin. The only unique faces Ellie has on top of those are the more playful tongue-out smile (present only when his hood is off) and the contemplative downward gaze. Gumi has a knowing smile, a hopeful smile, and a content smile. With those differences, we conclude that, on the whole, Gumi seems to have a bit more hope in the world, while Ellie is downcast. I’m sure you couldn’t have guessed that by the results of the last two points (/s).

Ellie has a costume change.

Not hard to notice; Ellie takes his hood off mid-MV while Gumi keeps her outfit the same.

There’s a part of the song where Ellie disappears while Gumi is present.

If anything in this question is going to be important, it’s probably this tidbit. At 1:39 in DRDT Yoidoreshirazu and 1:37 in original Yoidoreshirazu, the line “and my heart is dyed” plays. At this point in the MV, Gumi is present on screen, but Ellie is not. Gumi then disappears alongside Ellie for the following “sore wa” before both reappear for the chorus, but the difference is still notable. Something about the line “and my heart is dyed” caused DRDTdev to remove Ellie from the MV when he otherwise should have been there. This could mean that Ellie’s absence is what caused his heart to be dyed, that Ellie was actually absent when the heart dying occurred, or something else. Regardless, the difference in visuals– especially one that leaves the lyrics as the only thing on screen for you to look at– means that “and my heart is dyed” is likely the most important lyric of the song for Ellie.

Ellie is doing a whole lot more in the final chorus.

This is probably why I thought that Ellie had more sprites than Gumi did, other than the whole two outfits thing. Throughout the entire second chorus, Gumi only uses one face, the smile with big eyes. Meanwhile, Ellie rotates through four different faces before returning to the one he started with; scary stare -> neutral -> eyes closed -> grin -> tongue-out smile -> scary stare. It gives Ellie a whole lot more character than Gumi had in that final portion. Granted, the inverse is also true: Ellie switched faces less frequently than Gumi at the beginning of the song. It leads me to believe that the lyrics at the end of the song may be more important to Ellie than the lyrics of the start, as the end is featured as the most memorable portion.

#10: So, um… What did we learn, exactly?

Honestly… I don’t know. Unlike the Chapter 2 murder, which is intended to be basically solvable, or even the characters’ secrets, which have had much revealed with minimal possible permutations, so little has been confirmed about Ellie that it makes it near impossible to settle on one answer as absolute truth. I can write out my current best theory about what may be going on with Ellie, but it’s honestly so implausible that I don’t really think it’s going to be canon myself.

If we prioritize the information given to us in this music video and the Q&As and disregard the effects that our conclusion might have on the story of DRDT as a whole, then I think the most likely option was actually Option D, Ellie became this way after he died. I think that Ellie was a bright young man– maybe not perfect, but still an older brother that Charles could look up to. Ellie and Charles were really close when Charles was a little kid, and they loved to hang out and eat pancakes together.

One day– maybe when Charles was about 4 and Ellie was about 16?– Ellie saw a dog on the side of the road and, loving dogs, brought his baby brother over to say hi to it. Unfortunately, the dog was feral and mean, and it bit Charles on the arm, injuring him greatly. Defending Charles, Ellie attacked the dog and told Charles to run away for safety. Charles made it back to his parents, bleeding and horribly traumatized, while Ellie did not. Ellie never came back home, so his parents had no choice but to assume he was dead. They chose to conceal the existence of their elder son from their younger, whether to avoid triggering Charles’ phobias or because they too wished him erased from the history books.

However, even though the world believed that Ellie had died, he actually survived!  Though, not in one piece. He was probably severely wounded (perhaps leaving behind scars on any part of his body that wasn’t shown in the MV), and, just like his brother, suffered amnesia that caused him to forget who he was. From there, it depends on how he would have survived the dog attack.

If he barely emerged victorious from the battle due to his own power, then, with no memories, he was forced to live on the street. He gained his washed-up attitude from experiencing life’s hardships while being right on the cusp of remembering something more.

If he received aid from and then was indebted to a group like XF-Ture Tech, he may have been given some kind of help, but not without a cost. He probably started working for them in some capacity, even if he wasn’t a fan of his work/coworkers, and gained his washed-up attitude from years of nihilistically supporting the shady company.

The MV takes place in a time close to present day, when Ellie is reflecting on the state of his life and what he does remember. He hates the people he’s surrounded by, and can only lean on his bad habits (substance abuse and/or appearing more uncaring/airheaded than he actually is) to get by. He knows that he’s a shell of a person with no memories of his past or aspirations for his future, but there isn’t really anything he can do about it, right…? The vague memories of a “rival in love” and a main “story” are the only things giving him a taunting yet unerasable hope.

Woohoo, drama. But, like, that’s ridiculous, right? The secret literally said that Ellie was dead! How the hell could he still be alive? Did the mastermind’s source– whatever it was– just have the facts wrong, or are they actually lying? Wouldn’t the Cuevas family have looked harder for the body? Does amnesia even work like that? Does XF-Ture Tech even work like that???

Needless to say, I am still quite confused. The answer above is still the answer that makes the most sense to me, but it also has its own obvious flaws. I feel like I must just be straight up wrong about the identity of the Cuevas family, the method of Ellie’s death, the age at which Ellie appears in this MV, or something like that, but I don’t know what it would be. Even more than usual, I’d love to hear everyone else’s thoughts on this mysterious character. I feel like more analysis of the guy is going to come out soon, so hopefully some of the more numerical data like trying to pin down Ellie’s age or noticing the differences in the two MVs will help someone else make a breakthrough. Still, I encourage you to come forth with anything you have to say, because I want to hear it.

Thus concludes your instructional pamphlet on how to write an essay on a music video at a rate of 54 words per second of the music video. Thanks for reading!

[ae-to-the-snow]

[NSFW] Enemies with Benefits • Puzzle

[NSFW] Enemies with Benefits • Puzzle

Headcanons • NSFW • Puzzle • Reader unspecified/not mentioned

Cw/Tw: Mean Puzzle, hate sex, sadism, masochism, degrading, mean sex, blood

Note: This post contains content unlike anything I've written before, somewhat violent hate sex. Please tell me if I should add any more content/trigger warnings.

NSFW UNDER THE CUT | MINORS DNI |

An enemy to Victoria. Whoever he's aligned with, they want this target subdued. And that's Puzzle's job.

Just what if, though, this target keeps escaping, and what started as a mission, got him tangled up with the enemies tricks, with maybe a few moments that he got too close.

And it eventually turned into nights neither of them can speak about. Who would dare to tell their superior they slept with the enemy agent? It'd be over. So they both keep quiet. A silent agreement, to not snitch on each other.

Not a truce, not an open fire. Just a dagger held to both of their necks. If one of them speaks out, the other is coming down with them. An equal arrangement, equally toxic, equally beneficial... Maybe a little twisted, maybe a lot.

But Puzzle has seen it all.

He's not the type to see sex as this holy matrimony marriage sacred rite. It is simply what it is. A means to let out his frustration, whether hormonal or emotional. And if his enemy looks good when he's in bed with them, then he might consider it.

He doesn't sleep around, no. It's unthinkable to him that he might possibly do it with an enemy. But... Nothing's really stopping him.

He gets to keep tabs on the target, have a good time, and learn about his target. Same with said target themselves.

If you rat him out whether it be to your team, or to his superior, he could easily do the same to you and give out your location. Sounds equal enough to him.

But if he has a love-hate relationship with someone, he might just get feral when fucking with them. If he hates them periodt, he wouldn't even look at them.

Ranging from degrading to biting till he draws blood, he even scratches. Hair pulling, slapping, edging and overstimulation. That's what you get when you have a hate-fuck enemies with benefits kind of situation with Puzzle, given that he is into his partner.

He bites a lot. Something about marking his partner, another part about the feeling of it. Maybe his years as a spy have gotten him desensitized, or maybe he does like the slight sight of blood staining his lips and the sheets after he bites into the skin.

His degrading isn't the typical slut or whore, more like bringing up your shared past, and how you two are fucking right now. He gets vulgar, and he gets specific and personal.

He'd hardly have time to tease, he rather gets his partner prepped and straight to the point.

But if he needs to ruin them real quick, he will give oral and then leave his partner high and dry, just to see them crumble. Because of him. Or even use his fingers.

He does take at least a little pride in ruining his targets and watching them crumble. Especially if it's that specific person he has this enemies with benefits relationship with.

He hates you, he swears. But he might feel a little too good from this little relationship you have going on.

Afterwards, usually after only one round, he's not exactly tired out but he needs to move before someone gets suspicious. He might edge them a little. To come back for more. But he'd always leave. Only to come back.

Chat idk what happened here I just had a vision I was never into hate fucking or anything until I realized Puzzle might be into it. And then I found it hot. So here's an incomplete 1am ramble. Anyways. Tell me what you think cuz I wrote this while sleep deprived.

[lily-174]

Hi, hope you're well. For Dante Torres how about oc and Dante are friends since high school, had a brief relationship, and now she's with a bad guy from their neighbourhood that Dante tries to get her to leave. Maybe he admits his feelings, maybe not.

not the way i love you. - Dante Torres x reader

overview: when dante figures out your dating a bad guy from the neighbourhood he does not approve. dante goes to you concerned and tried getting you to see it from his point of view.

trigger warnings; mentions of drugs, violence, toxic relationships, domestic violence and manipulation

**

toxic relationships were nothing new to you having grown up in chicago, but you’d always had your best friend by your side who would stick up for you, dante. throughout your teenage years he was a godsend, doing everything in his power to keep you safe and out of trouble.

dante was a gentleman, considering his childhood with his mom and stepdad he was nothing but respectful and gentle towards you. even as teenagers he’d ask before hugging you he was always so gentle and you’d always admired him for that. he was a man of few words but what he did say always meant something.

but you’d barely spoken to dante for months, it’s not that you didn’t want to speak to him. you did. he was your best friend and you loved him. but you knew he wouldn’t approve of your boyfriend johnny.

you weren’t stupid, you knew johnny wasn’t the best guy on paper but he seemed nice when you first started dating so you gave him a chance which you particularly regretted. the longer you were with him the worse the comments he would make we’re getting and the more you drifted from dante.

you couldn’t understand why you felt how you did while you were with him, but in the back of your mind you knew. he wouldn’t let you go out with your friends, he would monitor what you were doing and wearing. and if you did something wrong even the neighbours would know about it.

you missed dante and you knew he could help you but you felt ashamed that you got yourself so deep into this situation, and you were afraid of having no one, being alone. you wanted to feel love, real love but you were afraid that would never happen. so a part of you was tricking you into thinking what you had with johnny was real.

you’d been ignoring dante’s calls and texts, you didn’t want to bother him and you definitely didn’t want johnny to find out your guy best friend is a cop in the best unit in the city. you knew if dante found out about your home life he would be all over it, domestic violence had tells and you knew he would be able to spot them like that.

dante was worried, you hadn’t ignored him like this ever and that concerned him. he knew you didn’t live in the best neighbourhood, so he tried calling you once more. sat in the bullpen he held his phone to his ear tapping his fingers against his desk as the phone rang. the first time in months the call connected and the voice that spoke shocked him.

“who’s this?” a man’s voice rung through dante’s ear, one he’d never heard before, concern for you rushed through him.

“dante? who’s this why have you got y/n’s phone?” dante asked leaning back in his chair, brows furrowed prepared to storm into your house to find out whoever the fuck was talking to him.

“i’m her boyfriend that’s why. i’ve never heard of you. you don’t ever call this number back or i’ll bury you” those words pissed dante off, he stood up grabbing his jacket from the back of his chair.

“what’s your name. cause im sure as hell you’re not threatening me” dante spoke bluntly, his anger boiling as he tried to figure out who was claiming to be your boyfriend as he wrote a small note saying he’d be back and handing it to kevin before he left the bullpen making his way downstairs.

“johnny. now don’t you dare ever call this number again” that’s the last thing dante heard before the call disconnected, sighing he went outside getting in his car and drinking to your place, the whole way he felt a sense of dread, just by speaking to johnny he knew he was a bad guy. there was no way in hell a dante was going to let anything happen to you.

parking up outside your apartment he made his way inside and knocked on the door loudly his knuckles firmly connecting to the door, he heard shuffling then the door slowly cracked open. you peered outside panic rushing through your body as you saw your best friend.

“what- what are you doing here?” you asked peaking out of the small gap you’d opened the door, dante shook his head.

“y/n let me in, who’s johnny?” he said gently putting his hand on the door to push it open you sighed anxiety filling your stomach as he entered the apartment, luckily johnny had just left to pick up and wouldn’t be home for an hour, your arms instinctively wrapping around yourself as dante looked around the mess of your apartment before looking back at you waiting for your answer.

“he’s my boyfriend-“ dante’s face dropped as he noticed a almost completely faded bruise on your cheek, he could bare notice it but he knew something was up, he didn’t even need a reason to beat this guy up. tilting your face up and to the side so he could examine your cheek.

“he did this?” you looked down ashamed, swallowing the bile in your throat, you could’ve gone to him for help sooner and this would’ve never happened you knew what dante was like he would’ve never let you near him. you could see the pure anger in dante as the look behind his eyes changed and his jaw tightened you could feel the anger radiating from him. he stared at you waiting for your answer.

“please let me help you” his voice softer then before, full of worry and concern as it came out as him begging rather then an order, looking back up at him. you sighed wishing you could’ve done this all differently then you nodded. dante sucked in a deep breath the guilt of not getting involved quicker festering inside him.

“he won’t hurt you again y/n, i’m not gonna let it happen. come with me” dante reasoned holding his hand out for you to take, he looked at you in hopes you would trust him enough to leave with him but you didn’t take his hand, he was already trying so hard to keep composure but dante did have a slight problem with his anger.

“i’m not leaving you here. you know i can protect you, you know i won’t let him hurt you so what are you scared of?” dante asked a slight bit of annoyance showing in his voice as he tried staying calm, you looked up at him tears brimming in your eyes. you didn’t want to say anything.

“what are you scared of? you know i’ve got your back, i’m sorry i let this happen to you but i won’t let you stay here” dante said taking your hand in his, you missed him. you missed the safety he brought you. you’d been in love with him for years, you’d just never been able to admit it. you couldn’t risk ruining things with the only person you had left.

“i don’t want to be alone” your voice cracked as you tried to hold back tears dante looked down at you his expression soft and concerned as he shook his head.

“you won’t be.. you’ll stay with me?” you sighed wiping your eyes before shaking your head at his words that’s not what you meant. you didn’t want to be alone, you had a fear. a fear of not finding love. a fear of being forever alone.

“that’s not what i mean.. he’s the only one who loves me. i don’t have a family dante. if i leave him i’m not gonna find anyone else” that’s what scared you, and it took dante by surprise as he shook his head taking hold of both of your hands.

“that’s not true. you have me” you sighed again knowing he was just saying whatever he could to get you out of your current situation. you didn’t believe him, but he needed to go johnny would be back soon.

“you’re just saying that, you don’t love me. you need to leave he’s gonna be back soon” you tried to usher him out the door but he wasn’t having any of it. standing in place he shook his head holding your hands firmly but gently.

“i do love you” he said and you sighed trying to move him over to the door but he wouldn’t let you hands go, you just wanted all of this to be over.

“not the way i love you” was all you managed to say before his lips gently crashed into yours, initially shock rushed through your body but you kissed him back, his hand cupping your cheeks, the kiss full of love and admiration as you felt like your body was on fire as he kissed you, you deepened the kiss the feeling of his lips so intoxicating. as you felt one his his hands fall on your waist. the churning of butterflies deep in your stomach was enough to make you feel dizzy. his big hand on your waist made you just want to be in his arms forever, the safety and comfort he’d always brought you amplified. when he finally broke the kiss his hand remained on your waist as he looked down at you with a small smile on his face that mirrored yours.

“i love you. i always have. now please come with me? let me keep you safe.” was all he had to say and you nodded, you knew he could keep you safe and he loved you. you kissed him. your best friend.

[amaretigris]

Can I request a Jonah fic please?

Hi! Of course lovely. Thank you for this request 🤗💖 I just wrote what I came up with since there were no specifications. I hope you like it! 🫶❤️

₊˚⊹♡₊˚⊹♡₊˚⊹♡₊˚⊹♡₊˚⊹♡₊˚⊹♡₊˚⊹♡₊˚⊹♡₊˚⊹♡₊˚⊹♡₊˚⊹♡₊˚⊹♡₊˚⊹♡₊˚⊹

A New Adventure

2.3k words | Angst & fluff | Language warning

₊˚⊹♡₊˚⊹♡₊˚⊹♡₊˚⊹♡₊˚⊹♡₊˚⊹♡₊˚⊹♡₊˚⊹♡₊˚⊹♡₊˚⊹♡₊˚⊹♡₊˚⊹♡₊˚⊹♡₊˚⊹

Jonah had always been around. He was your brother's best friend. You'd seen him in settings ranging from family events to nights out at the bar. In every situation though, he'd always just been Jonah. You weren't nervous around Jonah; he was familiar. He'd been friends with your brother for half your life.

Sure, your friends would always gossip to you about how hot he was. You never had much input. You simply didn't see him that way. All of your friends had casually asked you to give Jonah their numbers at least once. You explained to them, over and over, that your relationship with Jonah wasn't like that. He was Sebastian's friend, not yours. You couldn't just walk up to him and start a normal conversation.

Jonah never made you uncomfortable; no, that wasn't it. It was the fact that he almost completely ignored your existence. Aside from passing each other in your house when you lived with your brother and parents, Jonah had literally never paid attention to you. You thought maybe he'd been around you so long that you'd become invisible to him. Or worse, that he thought of you as a little sister. An annoying little sister, perhaps.

So, you never bothered him. You never talked to him. You rarely even looked his direction or smiled at him. You just went about your daily life, knowing that nine times out of ten, Jonah would be there.

One Saturday night, you planned a night out at the bar with your friends. Not surprisingly, Sebastian, Jonah, and their mates arrived at the same bar shortly after you and your friends. Your groups stayed on opposite sides of the bar, per usual when you ran into each other. It had happened several times before.

"O.m.g. How does Jonah get hotter every time I see him?"

Your friend Veronica pretended to swoon.

You rolled your eyes. While all your friends were huddled in the corner, giggling and stealing glances at the guys across the room, you were taking shots. You were so bored of this topic. You just wanted to get drunk and dance. After throwing three shots back, you dramatically stood from your chair.

"I'm going to fucking dance," you mumbled.

The DJ at the bar was just starting to play your favorite dance music. Walking out onto the small dance floor by yourself, you began shaking your hips and moving to the beat, and others soon followed. Before you knew it, the small dance floor was packed. It was getting warm. It could be from all the bodies, or from those shots. Either way, you were finally starting to enjoy your night.

After about six songs, you felt a body come up behind you. The person tenderly grabbed your hips, bringing them back to theirs. Normally, you would turn and scold whoever dared touch you without your consent. But at the present moment, with the alcohol flowing through your system, you found that you didn't mind it. Their hips moved in time with yours, and it was nice to have someone to dance with. Feeling all your inhibition fly out the window, it wasn't long before you were grinding your hips into theirs. What did it matter anyway? You were just dancing.

You and your dance partner went through three or four songs this way, and you had even leaned your back to their chest, letting your fingers reach up to their soft hair. You still hadn't seen their face. The idea of turning to them had just crossed your mind when, all of a sudden, you felt an arm grip yours harshly. It yanked you away from the body behind you. Immediately snapping out of your buzz, you looked up to see who the hell grabbed you.

"What the fuck?"

You spat. Your lips clamped shut as soon as your eyes found the person responsible. It was your ex. Your very jealous, very angry ex. The two of you had a very nasty break up three months ago. It didn't upset you much; the two of you had only been together for a couple months anyway. He, however, took it very badly. You'd had to block his number and block him on all social media. He was saying crazy things about you being the love of his life. You felt nowhere near that intense love for him, so you thought it was best to just detach.

And now here he was, staring back angrily at you. Before you could say anything else, he yanked your arm again, pulling you outside. Your mind started to swirl from the adrenaline and the alcohol. Once you were out the back entrance, your ex pushed you up against a wall. Your back slightly ached from how roughly he handled you.

"What the hell, Flynn? What are you doing here?"

You croaked out. You crinkled your brow, and held a hand to your head. Everything was spinning.

"What the fuck were you doing dancing with him like that, huh (Y/n)? All those times you told me not to be jealous. I always knew there was something going on between the two of you," he replied angrily.

You blinked your eyes open and fixed them on Flynn.

"What are you talking about?!"

You were sobering up quickly, and growing impatient. Flynn shouldn't be here, and he had no right to put his hands on you and drag you outside. Had no one seen him drag you out? What about the guy you were dancing with?

Flynn scoffed.

"Don't play dumb. I saw you grinding on him. I fucking knew you were sleeping with him," he sneered.

You attempted to shove Flynn away from you, but he caught your arms. You struggled against him.

"Hey!"

You heard a voice in the distance, but didn't have time to look up. Suddenly, Flynn was being pulled away from you.

"The fuck are you doing, mate? You don't put your fucking hands on her like that," you heard the voice echo on the patio as you put your hands on your knees, simultaneously trying to breathe and not vomit.

A scuffle must have erupted while your head was down, because you definitely heard someone get hit. The sound of the gate followed, cuing that someone ran out of it. Before you could look up, gentle hands were at your elbows, lifting you up.

"Are you okay, (Y/N)?"

Whose voice was that? You'd heard it before. As the hands eased you up to stand, you connected eyes with Jonah. Your mouth almost fell open.

"Yes," you stuttered, licking your lips.

You didn't miss the way Jonah's eyes followed the action.

"Yes, I'm okay. Just a little stunned is all," you blurted.

Why were you nervous? You instantly noticed that Jonah's hands hadn't left your arms.

"Why are you out here?"

You were curious why he had come, of all people.

Jonah's face took on a puzzled expression.

"What do you mean, (Y/N)?"

You straightened your back at hearing your name tumble out of his lips again.

"I mean why are you here? None of my friends saw him grab me?"

Jonah shook his head.

"No. The crowd on the dance floor was packed pretty tightly. I was following the two of you out when he grabbed you, but I got stopped by some women," Jonah winced.

Ignoring the picture that popped in your head, you were still confused.

"How did you see him grab me and my friends didn't then?"

At your question, Jonah's mouth formed an o, and he dropped his hands from your arms. He scrubbed one across the back of his neck nervously.

"Oh, uh, I guess you might not have realized. I was the one dancing with you," Jonah admitted with a tinge of pink on his cheeks.

You swore time stood still.

"What?"

The question was more for yourself or the universe than it was for Jonah. Jonah chuckled, grimacing.

"Yeah, I apologize for coming up behind you like that. I'd been drinking, and I love watching you dance. I couldn't help myself tonight. I wanted to dance with you," he shrugged.

You swallowed the lump in your throat. What did this mean? You were grinding on Jonah that entire time. Had your friends or Sebastian witnessed it? Also, what the hell: he loves watching you dance? So many questions flooded your mind. You blinked at Jonah, and then moved to walk past him, back into the bar.

"Wait, (Y/N)!"

Jonah instinctively grabbed your arm, but let go when you stopped and looked down at his hand.

"Look, I'm sorry. I know I haven't been the nicest to you over the years-" Jonah started.

"You're right, you haven't," you snapped.

"I was pretty convinced that you hated me, and now you suddenly have the urge to dance with me? What the hell, Jonah?"

You threw your hands up in frustration.

"I know what it looks like, and I'm sorry. I truly am. I have never hated you," Jonah tried to placate.

You were having none of it.

"That's not how it looks, Jonah. That's how it is," you corrected.

Jonah huffed a breath.

"Please, (Y/N), let me explain. If you don't believe it, then you can leave, and we can go back to never speaking again," he suggested.

You let out a tired sigh, shaking your head.

"You have, like, a minute tops," you acquiesced, crossing your arms over your chest.

Jonah looked relieved, clearing his throat.

"Right. When Sebastian and I were graduating high school, I noticed you at the ceremony. You had always been there, always as Sebastian's little sister, but I began to see you in a different light. I saw how you blossomed into a kind, intelligent young woman over the years. I began to notice that your laugh can always bring life to any room. I began to see things you were doing to better the world around you. I started to see who you truly are," Jonah smiled down at you, dimples on full display.

Damn those adorable dimples.

"I realized that I actually liked being around you. So, naturally, I distanced myself. I always kept you at arm's length, and pretended not to notice you. I thought that falling for my best friend's sister would be too ironic," Jonah sucked in a nervous breath.

"The fact of the matter is that I'm drawn to you, (Y/N). I can't deny it anymore. My eyes follow you anytime we're in a room together. I feel a pang in my chest when I realize that your eyes don't search for mine. I don't know what to do with these feelings, so I've pushed them down. But tonight, when I saw you dancing, I felt pulled to you. Like I said, I couldn't help myself," Jonah shrugged, letting you digest his words.

You pursed your lips, deep in thought. Jonah's bright blue eyes looked sincere. Over the years, you'd heard people call Jonah many things, but a liar was never one of them.

You strummed your fingers on your arm, grunting.

"How do I know this isn't a trick?"

You eyed Jonah suspiciously. As much as you wanted to believe him, you just weren't sure you bought the whole story.

Jonah's mouth fell open at your question.

"What? (Y/N), I would never do that to you. Firstly, Sebastian would kill me. Secondly, this has been years in the making. I'm sure that if my feelings were insincere, they would have passed by now. Haven't you wondered why I never date?"

Your eyes bulged at the realization. Jonah never dated because of you? That was insane. Women literally threw themselves at him all the time.

"I know what you're thinking," Jonah put up his hands in surrender, slowly taking a step towards you.

"And yes, I never date because of you. I had resigned myself to years of only seeing you at Sebastian's place or at your family gatherings. I thought that it would be enough, but it's not. I want to be with you, (Y/N). I want you to know me like I know you," Jonah cautiously lifted his hand to cup your cheek.

You fiercely studied his eyes. When you still only found sincerity in them, you decided to cave, leaning into Jonah's touch. His lips parted with a small gasp when you leaned your cheek into his hand, and closed your eyes.

"Don't fuck this up, Jonah," you begged.

Jonah chuckled, bringing up his second hand to cup your other cheek.

"I wouldn't dream of it," he whispered, leaning into you.

You felt his warmth growing closer, but you kept your eyes closed, feeling Jonah's lips brush against yours. You reciprocated, and Jonah molded his mouth to yours. You were getting lost in the kiss when the two of you were startled by the door slamming open.

"Oi, there you are," Sebastian yelled.

Wincing, you waited to get an earful from your brother. The reaction you got instead surprised you.

"Ugh, you two are finally hooking up? Took ya long enough," he slurred.

You fixed him with a shocked look.

"What do you mean?"

Sebastian rolled his eyes and leaned against the doorframe, holding his beer in one hand.

"Psshh. Jonah's been making googly eyes at you for years. I know how to read my best friend. 'm not an idiot," he said like it was obvious.

"Come on back inside, everyone's dancing now," Sebastian motioned behind him before he turned to go back into the bar.

You looked at Jonah with a cheeky smile. His dimples made their appearance again before Jonah grabbed your hand in his.

"Come on, (Y/N). Let's go start a new adventure."

[imdoingaokay]

I have an idea! The romanced companions reacting to female sole survivor dying during combat!

(A/N): I know, I know, you all missed me. I missed you too haha.

I'm sorry for the long wait, I promise it wasn't on purpose. As I've said before, I am in nursing school, which makes getting out a stuff super difficult. But I love you guys and I love writing!

Sole was written as Gender Neutral, love you <3

Anyways, enjoy my garbage, I wrote this during my class hehehe

SUPER HUGE TW FOR THE FOLLOWING: Descriptions of death, death in general, nothing too graphic (but still), and plenty of angst

Cait: She can’t help but feel terrible like she failed Sole. It doesn’t help that she was right there when it happened.

Watching Sole slump down, hearing their breathing slow until they completely stilled. It was a feeling she had grown used to, but not one she wished to revisit.

She doesn’t know what to do, so she does what she thinks is best. She buries Sole unless Sole specified they wanted their body burned or something. She tells the Minutemen, The Railroad, Brotherhood, or the Insitute, whoever needs to be informed, and then she leaves. She never really thought she was worthy of Sole, regardless of whether they were a “good” or “bad” person, so she leaves as soon as possible. 

She tries her best to stay away from drugs and alcohol. But, realistically? If Sole dies? There’s a solid chance she throws herself back in unless Sole was with the Minutemen or the Railroad and set up a grief group before they passed.

Romanced, Cait is still in pain, still mourning, but it hurts more. She finally had something good, something healthy, and it was ripped away from her. Cait stays wherever had become Sole’s home, and sort of adopts a caretaker role, she works alongside the settlement workers. She tries to honor Sole’s memory, whatever it may have been. She never really moves on, but she forgives herself. And she thinks that’s what Sole would’ve wanted.

Curie: In absolute agony. She tries her best, really tries to stitch Sole up to the best of her abilities. But as she watches Sole slip away, Curie knows she can’t do anything. Not like it makes it any easier.

Curie uses Sole’s pip-boy and begs for backup, begging for help to get Sole’s body out of range. Eventually, when some help does arrive, Curie is hysterical. She can’t seem to forgive herself for her mistakes, despite not making any. She returns to Sole’s home and decides to leave soon after. Curie still feels the guilt of not being able to save Sole, so she decides to help others. Curie slowly turns a name, a mysterious doctor who appears around the Commonwealth, treats patients, then leaves, and the cycle continues. Curie can’t forgive herself for failing her friend, but she can make up for her mistakes by helping others.

Romanced, Curie may settle instead. Choosing to stay where both she and Sole called home. She becomes the Settlement’s doctor and becomes a very good one at that. She isn’t as bubbly as she once was, just more reserved.

Danse: No, no, no! Danse sprints over to Sole, and despite his power armor, he moves relatively fast. He uses his power armor to block Sole’s body from any potential projectiles. Danse picks up his friend, praying they’re still alive, and flees. 

Once in a safe area, Danse lays his friend down and realizes… they’re gone. Sole gave Danse a second chance at life after Danse himself was convinced he didn’t deserve it, and now they were gone. How does that happen? He can’t find it in him to cry, he frowns deeply and picks up his friend again, now returning Sole to wherever or whoever needed them, needed Sole’s body. And Danse will take Sole anywhere if they need. The Railroad, Institute… preferably to the Minutemen, however.

He even takes Sole’s body to Cambridge Police Station if Sole was loyal to The Brotherhood. 

Once Sole’s body has been delivered, Danse returns to Listening Post Bravo. And for the first time, he weeps. He’s lost so many, and it seems like he’s always the one left behind.

He’ll leave the Commonwealth, and go somewhere, anywhere, probably out west. He fights ghouls and super mutants, mindlessly shooting until he can’t anymore.

Romanced, it’s worse, it’s so much worse. Danse screams Sole’s name, sprints over, and takes them to cover. Danse gets out of his armor and cradles his lover, he begs, screams, and pleads with whatever god he can to save his lover. But it’s too late, Sole is gone. And Danse is alone.

Danse returns his lover’s body but doesn’t leave wherever they are buried. He stays, becoming a farmer and working his heart out for whatever Settlement Sole had claimed as theirs. Danse thinks that Sole would want him to be happy, and would want him to move on. But Danse can’t do that. He loves Sole too much to move on. But he continues living, and living is good enough.

Deacon: Deacon isn’t a very serious guy, but the moment he sees Sole fall, he’s the most serious man he knows. Deacon shoots any enemies nearby and quickly rushes over to Sole. He shakes his friend, begging them to wake up, but after a few seconds, he realizes that Sole is dead. His friend is dead. Per Railroad guidelines, Sole is supposed to be left behind at least, buried in an unmarked grave at best. So why does Deacon hesitate? Why does he carefully carry Sole back to their home a bury them properly? Respect? Compassion? Adoration? Nobody knows, Deacon always changes his story.

Sole becomes just another body, another story, one he might tell to the next doomed soul he meets. But honestly? Deacon doesn’t expect to live long enough for that.

Romanced, Deacon is immediately by his lover's side, he holds his lover as tightly as he can and attempts to stop the blood and comfort his lover, but as soon as they still, as soon as they go limp, Deacon breaks. He silently holds them and takes them home. He’ll probably still work for the Railroad, work helping Synths until they don’t need him anymore, but he isn’t the same. He’s so much sadder and so quiet. He’s effective and gets the job done, but when Sole died, so did a bit of Deacon.

Gage: Furious at first, how dare Sole die? How dare they die right here? How dare they leave him alone? At the start of their friendship, he would’ve been slightly annoyed, but Gage and Sole have been friends for longer. And now, he’s alone. He barred his heart, he told them everything about themselves, and now Sole is just gone, his friend is just… gone. He does what he has to do, and gives them a burial, potentially somewhere other than in Nuka-World. After that, he takes up the mantle of Overboss, not happily, don’t get me wrong. He would much rather avoid that role, but Sole was the best one the raiders had, and nobody else will be able to measure up to them. At least, with Gage, he can try to emulate Sole’s leadership. And he’ll do a pretty good job. Or at least, he’ll try until someone comes along and kills him. He’s fine with either.

Romanced, he sprints to his lover’s side, he holds them while they bleed out, “Alright, you’re fine. You��re fine, Sole.” He claims as if that will magically close the gaping wound in Sole’s side. He watches Sole slip away from his grasp and slowly break out into tears. He didn’t remember the last time he cried it was probably when he still lived with his parents. He feels ashamed for his softness while he sobs into his lover’s neck, feeling Sole’s body turn cold. But after his lover is buried, he refuses ever to cry again, deciding to harden himself for the rest of his life, however long it is.

He becomes Overboss, does his job, and waits… waits for his end. And when his end happens, he hopes it’s quick and hopes Sole will wait for him on the other side.

Hancock: He lies to himself, and says that Sole isn’t dead, they’re just knocked out. But the blood and the stillness of their body tells Hancock that his buddy is gone.

After burying or burning the body, Hancock returns to Goodneighbor and holes himself up in the Statehouse. Hancock always knew he would most likely outlive Sole, but he hoped it would be different. He hoped Sole would be an old man or woman, that they’d die peacefully after puffing some jet with Hancock. But the Wasteland is cruel, and it takes the best people away, just because it can.

He gets word that a few of the people in Goodneighbor want to set up a small memorial to Sole, and Hancock is more than happy to help. He keeps living, he’s certain that’s what Sole wants. He never gets that close to anyone again, not because he’s trying to guard himself, he just can’t find the time. He walks around the Commonwealth, throwing himself into helping everyone, that’s what Sole did. So without Sole, someone else has to pick up the “slack” so to speak. And he’s fine with that, hopefully, Sole is too. 

Romanced, he does his best to keep a brave face for Sole, sharing a final kiss before Sole eventually succumbs to their injuries. He cries for a while and throws himself into more chems. It’s Fahrenheit who encourages Hancock to get out of the Old State House and to go for a walk around Goodneighbor. He goes out on the balcony first and notices how bright it is outside. The past month had been fairly cloudy and gloomy, so Hancock stands there, feeling the sun on his face. He’s not very religious, but that warm feeling… it had to be a sign that Sole loves him, wherever they are, Sole loves him.

He never loves another again, not how he loved Sole, but he will keep living. He’ll keep going until the day comes when he and Sole see each other again. 

MacCready: He’s upset, for lack of a better word, so upset he ends up cursing for the first time in years. He grabs at his friend and clings to them, attempting to help them. But eventually, he has to face the music. They’re gone, and he’s alone. Unlike what he did with Lucy, MacCready brings Sole back, back to their home… wherever that might be. He’ll travel the entire length of the Commonwealth if it means that Sole will get a proper burial.

He’ll end up leaving, if Duncan hasn’t joined him in the Commonwealth, thinking that the Commonwealth has nothing left for him anymore. If Duncan has arrived in the Commonwealth, MacCready ends up retiring from mercenary work permanently. He’ll end up working as a guard in Sanctuary, working nights. It makes it easier to care for Duncan when he’s with him during the day. MacCready focuses on Duncan and Duncan alone, with no time for anything else.

Romanced, he’s a mess. He cries and clings onto Sole, begging them to wake up. But he knows it’s over. He mourns his lover, hauling their body to the pair’s shared home, and buries his lover despite the sadness he feels. Unlike if they were just friends, MacCready stays in The Commonwealth, bringing Duncan if he isn’t there already. He works as a guard, but refuses to ever love again, after all… nobody can measure up to Sole or Lucy. His life surrounds his son, and the memory of Sole. He feels terrible if Duncan never got a chance to meet Sole, but he tries to tell stories of them. 

He’s a good man, he tells himself. So he stays alive, for the sake of his son… and for the sake of Sole. Sole would want him to… right?

Nick Valentine: Nick comforts, if he can. He soothes his friend as much as possible. Talking to them as they bleed out. If he knows he can’t help, he just stays nearby and talks with his friend. Like Hancock, Nick expected to outlive Sole, but not like this. Nick watches his friend leave their world and prays they go to a better one. 

He covers Sole with his coat out of respect.  Hell, he ends up burying his friend in that coat. He doesn’t mind losing it, Sole deserves something to keep them warm under the 6 feet of earth.

He’ll continue to work, but he does his best to keep his memories of Sole, copying them from his subconscious and placing them on a holotape. Nick doesn’t want to forget them, not someone who did so much for him.

He’s so used to people leaving him, so used to the cruelty of the wasteland, but… 

Why Sole?

Romanced, Nick does much of the same, but he cradles his lover, holding and soothing Sole the best he can. But even if he can’t prevent his voice from cracking and breaking, he watches his lover go limp and does his best to return the body somewhere his lover can be properly buried.

He mourns, turning off the neon sign in Diamond City for well over a month. When it does come back on, Nick is back to work, still polite, cordial, and friendly. But everyone can’t help but feel the sadness in his eyes

It’s strange, he thinks. As time goes on, Nick’s memories come and go, but Sole’s memory stays. Maybe the “real” Nick Valentine, could only love Jenny, but Nick can only love Sole. And that sort of love stays, despite the space of an old synth’s hard drive.

Old Longfellow: He calls out for Sole, seeing them hurt breaks his heart. 

“No, kid… no you gotta get up, come on.” He tries to lift them, only to place them back down when he hears the pained cry of his chil-I mean… Sole.

He tries his best, but even he realizes there’s nothing he can do. He comforts them in their last moments, realizing that despite dying, Sole is trying to keep him calm. If he has one, he’ll share a drink with Sole, and watch as Sole breathes for the last time.

He’ll bury Sole on the mainland unless Sole says otherwise. But when Longfellow returns to his Cabin, he finds himself wondering what is next. He hoped it would be him to die first… he was supposed to die first. It was his fault, he didn’t do enough, and he should’ve taken the blow.

He sits on his bed, and for the first time in what feels like ages, he cries. Only to still himself a few moments later, he can’t cry. He has to move on, has to keep living.

He’ll keep living, wondering if he’ll die that day or the next, but he doesn’t mind either.

Longfellow works with Far Harbor more, now. Helping Synths pass through the fog with his help, if he can. He thinks Sole would approve.

Hopefully, he’ll meet someone who he can teach again. Someone younger… maybe that synth child Sole spoke to him about.

Romanced, he realizes that Sole needs him to calm down much faster. But he can’t help but admit to his lover before they go that it was his fault. He’ll never forget his lover smiling and cupping his cheek, feeling how warm it felt on his prickling beard. And he’ll never forget how they smiled and shook their head, in pain, but smiling. And all of a sudden, Longfellow feels some closure.

The rest of it moves the same, he continues to help and continues to live. But he’ll never love again, nobody else is like Sole, and even if there was… he doesn’t want them. Longfellow will always want Sole, not someone like them. And when the day comes when he returns to the sea or the dirt, he’ll embrace that with open arms… the way he hopes Sole will embrace him when they see each other once again.

Piper: Piper cries out “Blue?!” over and over again until her throat is raw, she shakes her friend, begging her friend to wake up. But Sole is dead. And that’s it.

She buries her friend the best she can, but when she returns home, she finds herself wondering what she should do next. So she does what she does best.

She writes.

Piper writes the most beautiful story about Sole, but it isn’t some sob story or some heroic tale. She tells the truth. She describes the story of Sole’s life after The Great War, and she writes the tale of Sole navigating through the post-apocalyptic world, how they won, and how they lost. And how despite it all, Sole persevered, and even when they were on death’s door… Well, maybe Piper does play Sole’s life up a little bit.

Regardless, Sole gets one hell of a send-off.

Piper continues writing, focusing on what matters to her.

Romanced, she does everything the exact same. She cries harder and writes faster, but most people in Diamond City agree, Piper isn’t the same. She’s still got that strong sense of justice, she will still do whatever it takes to get a story. But she takes more time off, spends more time with her sister, she lives. Because she’s certain that’s what Sole would want her to do. 

Preston: He does what he can at first, he picks his friend up and tries to get them away. But when Preston looks down and watches his friend grow weaker and weaker, he accepts it, he accepts that this is the end of The General. Preston brings Sole’s body back and gives them a proper funeral. 

He apologizes to his friend's grave, claiming it should’ve been them instead, tears gathering in his eyes. He knew he would cry over his friend, but not this hard. He’s adopted the role of General, he’s certain that Sole would’ve wanted that. He also adopts their leadership skills and learns how to grow the settlements. He’ll do his best, and he’ll be the best General he can be.

General Garvey has a nice ring to it anyways.

Romanced, he’s distraught. He clings to his lover and drags them home. At first, he can’t stop his tears. He begs his lover to come back, begs whatever god there is to take him instead, but Sole’s gone. Eventually, when the calls for help become too much, and when he can’t ignore them anymore, Preston dons the name of General. 

He continues to do his best and he’ll stay alive for as long as possible, for the sake of the Commonwealth… and for Sole’s sake too.

X6-88: He calls out for Sole, a few times. It doesn’t make sense to him, Sole isn’t supposed to bleed. He tries to give them stimpacks, but the blood… it’s too much. 

Sole may try to comfort X6, maybe try to stop him, but X6 can’t seem to stop trying to save them. But after Sole goes limp, after Sole goes cold, X6 realizes what he has done. 

He takes them back to The Insitute, waiting for reprimand, for something. If Father is still alive, he watches as the older man sighs and orders for the body to be taken away. Father watches X6 before asking, in a confused tone “Why are you crying?”

X6’s fingers go to his cheeks, where he feels the wetness from his tears. Quickly wiping them away, he apologizes and returns to his duties. But all of a sudden, he’s emotional? He thinks about Sole, how they acted toward others… X6 liked them... X6 admired them. X6 actually misses them. But he isn’t supposed to feel that way, not towards anyone. So why does he feel this way for Sole?

It takes him time, and he eventually comes to the realization that X6 feels this way because… he cared. He cared for Sole, and Sole cared for him. And maybe that makes him faulty and maybe that makes him a terrible Courser. But X6 can’t seem to care, not for that. 

Romanced, X6 probably had more time to work on his emotions, and more time to work on his outlook on just about everything. So when Sole dies, he knows that the reason he is crying is that he loved them. And X6… actually doesn’t mind that. He gets curious one day and reads a few books, and even overhears a few others speak, and over time, heals himself. He lives, works, and does what he needs to do because when the day comes, and he dies, he’s fine with it all. The love he had for Sole was real, and that’s worth something, isn’t it?

[nientedal]

📓📓📓 (for the "explain the plot of a fanfiction that you haven't written but daydream about" ask game!)

OK so here's one: LINK

I have another one in which Roxanne receives a mysterious CD, or perhaps a flash drive, and it's full of orchestral/symphonic music. She does not know who it's from. The music is lovely but she can't find any matches for it online. People in music forums are stumped. And based on some of the track names, it was made for her.

She brings it to one of the sound guys at work and he emails her later and says you know, it's weird - this stuff sounds like it's being played by a full symphony, but the track metadata shows signs of intense layering. I'd estimate this is all played by one or two, maybe four people tops. Multi-instrumentalists playing everything over and over and over and then layering it all together into something big.

So, she's got a CD full of music, no idea where it came from or who made it. Made for her by someone (or a very few someones) not only writing pieces but playing them repeatedly and constructing them, which is...she's torn between "creepy" and "deeply impressively flattering." She finally goes with both, and goes home wracking her brain for who the fuck would send her this--

Because the thing is. The thing. Is. The emotion in some of these pieces is... a lot. The one called Roxanne sounds like being in love, honestly, and holy shit, whoever wrote it... she wants to meet them, creepy or no, because the OTHER thing is, there was no note. And there continues to be no note. Weeks and then months go by and there is no indication that anyone is ever going to follow up about it or demand anything from her, and that's honestly the weirdest part of everything.

It's Megamind, of course. Of course it is. And Minion as well - Minion does the vocals with words, because Megamind can sing but he sings like whales or trombones sing, he can't do singing with words, it doesn't work. Minion does percussion as well, and some strings. They both do strings. And Megamind does all the woodwinds and brass, because you do sort of need air for those and Minion doesn't breathe, and Megamind does the solo wordless vocals. He has quite a range.

And there's a couple of ways I have Roxanne find out about this. One I'm fond of is that she works out where Evil Lair is and she gets inside, and she finds them working on one of these pieces. This possibility is also fun to imagine WITHOUT the CD sent to her in the mail -- she just comes in and they're recording music?? Somewhere she can hear, which is implausible, but shhhhhhhh, it's my fic in my head and it doesn't have to make perfect sense. Another way she might find out is for Minion or Megamind to be absently humming part of one of the motifs and she recognizes it-- or SHE hums one of the motifs (i don't know, she's bored and tied to a chair, zoning out, humming happens) and one of them jumps and goes a bit googly-eyed and she realizes oh hey, yeah, these two could pull that off.

There is also a variant in which Megamind intentionally shows her some of it because they are on a date for completely unrelated reasons, and his response to is villainy really ALL you do is no, I also write and perform orchestral compositions. And Roxanne is like, you're shitting me.

This is a fun one to play with while driving and listening to Thomas Bergersen's Sun album. There's one track on there titled Our Destiny which has a lot of trumpets and sounds just a bit like Metro Man's theme, which is actually what kicked this off-- they're old nemeses, they're on decently good terms, it would be fucking hilarious if Megamind anonymously put together a piece for some event or other and then showed up to be the pianist or something.

But yes, fun things to play with while driving and listening to music while rotating my blorbos in my head :D

[floareadeaur]

《 Ferid Bàthory as a human and father for many boys 》

• Human! Ferid Bathory x female!reader

• AU, healthy and human Ferid, him and the reader have a lot of children

• Author's words:

An anon asked me to specifically post this writing from my old blog. It is an old post from a year and half ago, I think. However, if anyone likes it, feedback is welcome!

I also wrote another work on this topic, somewhat inspired by the tragedy of the OnS universe. You can read it here, if you want.

That being said, enjoy and I wish a good day/evening to whoever finds this post!

Ferid as a human in an alternate universe — I see him very suitable as a father of many boys. That is because his nature is such that can create and find limitless possibilities — just what is needed for communication with a child. 

And the best listeners for such a crowded and twisted mind, who can be but the eternally open and creative children?

Especially, that with every boy in whose mind Ferid puts his own self, it is as if Ferid himself grows every time and manages to strengthen his own confidence, self-esteem, with the education that he provides more like a parent-friend to his boys.

I imagine how Ferid teaches his boys to punch, what technique to use. He is their master and allows his disciples to practice the new "techniques" they have learned as many times as they wish.

As his sweet, ever-attentive wife and mother to the little army of boys, you always tell them in a soft voice, "Stop hitting your brother. Be gentle. Play, don't hit."

And during this time, your husband keeps score with great passion and coolness of the mind — no one is allowed to cheat in the fight.

Maybe you would say something, you would draw Ferid's attention to stop provoking your children to unnecessary fights in the back garden of the house, in the living room, or in the hallway, but still, you trust him.

Because you always listen to the discussions between Ferid and the children, when two or three of the boys come from their "fight" to file a complaint, to blame each other. Then Ferid rests on his knees. You watch as he leans over them, his gray locks lightly brushing the sharp cheek, slipping out of the very original braid that your only little girl, who is in your arms, made for her papa. 

Ferid's smile is there on his face, but for a moment it disappears and his gaze becomes stern, or just sober — the man's gray eyebrows remain straight, the corners of the pale lips inert, but the blue eyes of his shine with a strong determination — just like those moments when Ferid wants to say something really important to the children.

You watch intently, the little girl humming softly in your arms.

"If you accuse each other one more time, you are all punished."

The effect is produced once Ferid's voice rang out with that different inflection. You notice with a smile the amazed faces of the boys gathered around him. Even they wonder why papa is so serious, why he does not smile anymore, like he always does.

Ferid's lips curve slowly, his eyes light up warmly, differently, sharp. Once the man continues his little speech, his face shines serenely, even sagely.

"You can fight, argue and play pranks! You can compete with each other, see who looks more like papa and is the best...!", his voice hums softly with that particular playful tinge.

You laugh softly behind them, but smile contentedly as Ferid's voice continues.

"But you are never allowed to accuse each other. What does papa say? In enemies you can strike until blood, avoiding the vital places and with them prison, but in brothers and family only in the soft layer of the skin and with much care and affection  !"

Already his smile shines playfully, just like the sparkles thrown seemingly every moment from under his gray eyelashes, which betray the impatient spirit, so childlike.

But his gaze is fixed on the children who stare at him speechlessly. Ferid cadently accents each word and his sharp lips articulate particularly attractively in the process. You notice that too. Ferid's way of talking to his loved ones is especially attractive in your eyes. Maybe that is why you feel a shiver in your body observing him.

The man's pale, bony hands gently ruffle the boys' light colored locks. Ferid encourages them to continue playing. Then he stands up and turns his head slightly. His gaze settles on you for a moment — deep, searching, with a special meaning, and you sigh quietly, as your husband's eyes seem to be whispering to you not to worry, smiling at the tiny girl humming on your chest.

It is the language of both, because you know that despite Ferid's extravagant nature, your husband knows what the limits are and what values ​​must be provided.

Ferid's weirdness is never meaningless, but his cold mind and warm heart ultimately work out the best solutions, in which you trust.

Just like your little boys and girl — for by the understanding light of their little eyes, they always believe in the lessons given by their father, who is also their best buddy, mentor and guardian.

[sepublic]

So on his Twitter, JBO just released this in-universe poem to the Titan, which he claims will be displayed alongside other art pieces at the gallery nucleus for TOH this Saturday... I’ll add a transcript at the end, but first, let me TRY to analyze...?

Okay, that bit at the beginning mentions bathyspheres, or rather bathysFEARS, because Boiling Isles puns. Love them, truly. The mention of an early version of Apple Blood is interesting, and at first made me consider that Evelyn wrote this; But we know this was discovered DURING the late Deadwardian era. Of course, an entire era is a wide range of time, and this was late into it; So while we know Evelyn was alive during Deadwardian times, it’s possible she did write it, and eventually by the end of her era, her poem was rediscovered.

If this is Evelyn’s work, then the jab towards humans at the end, musing that if they did originate from the Titan, it’d be from its butt, is interesting; Suggesting that Evelyn may have had a prejudice towards humans at first, but then changed her mind with Caleb. Or most tragically, loved Caleb, but after Philip ruined everything, developed a soured feeling for the rest of her husband’s species. However, the intro does mention it’s the EARLIEST poetry of the isles, so Evelyn probably isn’t the writer; But maybe her ancestor is?

The prose was... SOMETHING, but from what I can discern, the narrator is asking King’s dad (who of course doesn’t respond) where witches and demons came from, if they were born of his flesh, descended from the parasites and scavengers that ate it, etc. I think the narrator is suggesting that witches and demons were born of the eyes in particular? I need a dictionary for this... I wonder if this is a hint that we’ll get info on this in S3, perhaps by whoever wrote the Unauthorized History of the Boiling Isles?

Still, the speculation and invoking of the Titan’s brain is interesting; If witches DID first arise from the eye sockets of the Titan, then perhaps the first civilization of the Boiling Isles (circa the Hecktaceous period?) lived within the skull... And thus, the first witches may have created the lair where the Collector’s disc was later found by Philip, Luz, and Lilith.

The first generation may have honored the Titan’s wishes by constructing this prison for his enemy, the Grand Huntsman; And the mention of eyes (of which they are two) and the fact that there are two confirmed Collector discs, makes me wonder if the discs were fashioned from the Titan’s eyes... Regardless, early witches must’ve then migrated out of the skull through the eyes (leaving behind a prehistoric Stonesleeper), and reverence for the Titan and/or memories of this area as a birthplace for their kind led them to deem it sacred ground.

The narrator also speculates, I believe, that the Titan’s ‘nodes’ are still active in some form, perhaps alluding to the idea that King’s dad IS still conscious to some extent and influencing things, such as who sees Glyphs or not; Hence why looking at his face from the Knee is necessary. All this mention of dreaming also reminds me of the final episode’s title, Watching and Dreaming, which makes me wonder if King will get his dad’s consciousness and memories involved for the series finale; Or if it’ll be his own utilized, as he discovers an ability to create life from himself? Does this connect to Jean-Luc’s species?

(Also, if witches did originate from the eye sockets/skull of the Titan, inheriting the power of sapience from his brain to become a civilization; Did the Titan Trappers arise from other Titans, and aren’t aware of/don’t care about this?)

As for a transcript (under the cut);

ANTHOLOGY OF BOILING ISLES POETRY

THE TITANSONG TROVE

Discovered during the Late Deadwardian Era on a bathysfearic expedition, the Titansong Trove is a cache of the earliest extant poetry of the Boiling Isles. The Trove is comprised of eleven complete poems addressed to the Titan, along with dozens of scraps. Nothing is known the author, except that the parchments are saturated with aepleoffal, an early precursor to Apple Blood.

TITANSONG I. (DREAMING PSALM)

From what rot-region did we rise, Ruler

of all abiding in ageless aeons,

longlost, lore-scant?

-

(Ruler? As like that

hemmed-in horizons were thine heritage--

Or, born beastly and then badgered 

unto a dreary doom, down-falling into 

scalding seas with stones side-slashing.

-

Yet lordly and low alike, on death leak

putrid pus, parasite-packed, potent, smearing 

sickly-sheened stains, sights at which 

strong witches wobble and warworn demons

void appleblood-vaults all over, everywhere.

O, O, O, they say, O, O.

*A morbid misstep sends corpsejuice mouthward*

O, no, O, no. O, it got in my mouth.)

-

Digression done. Now digestion:

For torpid time turned torrid

thy formidable folds. And formerly 

enmarbled muscles melted to mire.

Battered bones broke; then, with boldness,

miniscule motes made a flesh-feast.

Such wondrous waste did they somewhen sup,

little by little old limits were lost,

till they were then: We. That is how

marvelously magilicious 

was thy tumescent Titanglut.

-

So. Where didst we wax? Where now are owed

our odes of awe?

-

...Okay, honestly?

Tis less to laud, and really more like:

Damn it, divulge, dude. Just tell us!

Not even poeming here. We just want to know where we came from

and why and everything else. Secrets. Answers. Everything.

Anything! Please. Come on. Hello? Hello? Hello?

-

So suspected: silence supreme.

Maw motionless, mind sense-mined,

eyes ember-empty. Empty sockets...

As if... eaten all away.

-

Well, then:

Could we not claim, conceivably, 

eye-rot excrescence our earliest eaves?

Think of them: those wriggling strings 

that float the fluids, forever fitful,

even with eyes closed, ever-lingering,

...Bombarded by outer beauty,

wilded by brainwaves, darkling dreamwoven....

-

Would not these nodes, when “ever” ended,

oscillate on? And as thine orbs’

juice turned jelly, clouding with junk, 

vital vitreal echoes prevail?

Resonant, reminding those remnants that

beyond filthbogged bariers, a

beaming beacons of new beauty.

Movement-making, masticating,

upwards we urged. Up, up, out-eating. 

To surface. Silence. Skimming the slime,

doused in dreamdew, our own day dawned.

-

Well? What say you? Were we thus born?

...Of course. Onlysilence. Well... one

thing is totally true at least for sure:

If Humans were hewn also from thine hide, 

‘twas thy butt begat those bozos. Ha.

Haha. Haha.

Aaahaha. Ahhhhh.

Got ‘em.

[gotstabbedbyapen]

A Welcome Letter

Greetings to whoever is reading this,

I am known as The Pen, death by being Caesar'd with pens, and the owner of this Tumblr blog. Yes, “The Pen” is not my real name - it was just one of my pseudonyms. But nobody needs to know my real name and my other pseudonyms :)

Anyway, now that you have stumbled upon here and wanted to know what to expect from me, here are some things you can jot down!

1. I am an everything enthusiast.

This is a fancy way to say that my content is very inconsistent. Most of the time, I brainrot over Greek gods and heroes and everything in between, especially Apollo and Hyacinthus. I'm also interested in other mythology or non-mythology topics, which you'll come to see.

Yes, I am a certified weird kid in real life. I always pay attention to the wrong things and want a place to scream about what I've learned. You might be side-glancing me right now, but I can't see you through the screen, so that's fine!

But my hyperfixation of something does not make me an expert. Everything you see on my blog should only prompt you to learn more about the “new thing” I just discovered, not accept it as a fact right away. I might be wrong. I might be missing something. I have a lot to dig through, and so do you.

2. I am a professional shitposter.

If the discoveries are too complicated and must be written in an essay with the 1000 words minimum to fully explain them, fear not!

I cannot write lengthy analyses without my pea-size brain exploding, so I will make them into memes to be more digestible. Please don't judge me! I am very uncultured and have a cringy taste.

Other than that, I will be writing incorrect quotes, doodling fanarts, and cooking other shitposts and shenanigans for no reason at all!

3. I am an amateur writer.

If the incorrect quotes are too long, I will write them into oneshots, long stories, or even series. English is not my first language, so my grammar and wording can be weird. I'm trying to improve them, but I guarantee nothing.

All my works are on Archive Of Our Own, and my account is GotStabbedByAPen. If you are interested, here are some of my Greek Mythology works!

Spin The Wheel - What are we having today? [ALWAYS ONGOING] A collection of oneshots I wrote about my favorite characters and relationships.

I'm Starving For Hyapollo Content [ALWAYS ONGOING] A collection series of my Apollo x Hyacinthus works, ranging from oneshots to longfics.

To Do What Is Right [COMPLETED] A Blood Of Zeus fanfiction, told from the perspective of Iris, goddess of rainbows and Hera's messenger.

Have A Word [COMPLETED] A oneshot featuring Zeus and Persephone, where the father and daughter talk things out about her marriage.

Hyacinthus Appreciation Week [COMPLETED] I wrote seven short stories in seven days as an appreciation act for our Spartan prince and his loved ones.

You Charmed A God - And He Fell [COMPLETED] A Poseidon x Nerites fanfiction I wrote in English and Vietnamese. You can find both versions in here.

That is all you need to know for now. Whether my blog is educational or entertaining or neither is up to you to decide. I still hope you have a good time here!

Thanks for sticking to the end. Don't forget to stay safe, stay sane, and keep making the good stuff!

Love you all,

The Pen

[tonio-trussardi-blog]

Hello Happy October!

Here's some centric/he's there Tonio fics that I like/find interesting :D

Finding stuff about Tonio is pretty difficult (as always) and I'm thankful for the people who take their time of day to write about our favorite chef.

There's some fics I still haven't read so if your fav isn't here SORRY.

If you want to share your fave fics or one you wrote yourself go ahead! (No proship)

(Don't forget to read the tags and warnings the fics contain/provide! )

Summary:

“Unfortunately, whoever killed my brother,” Tonio says, and Okuyasu’s breath catches at the word “killed” just like it always does, “was probably … doing something that needed to be done.”

They’re silent, heads bowed under the weight of the words. Okuyasu is thinking Yeah. Yeah, and it hurts so badly, but at the same time it feels like he’s been saved.

Every October since 2001, Tonio closes the Trattoria Trussardi and cooks alone. Okuyasu finally finds out why.

Words: 2,508

Ships: NONE GET OUT SHU

(ANGST ANGST ANGST ANGST ANGST ANGST OUCH)

Summary:

The fucked up thing is, when Okuyasu figures it out, has the epiphany, the lightbulb going off, the heavens opening up for angels to sing, Keicho stays dead. Dad stays this bulbous monster that rattles the walls and thuds feet on the floor. Mom doesn't show up alive at the door again.

Words:1,471

Ships: Nope

(AAAAAAA)

Summary:

“Pearl Jam’s range isn’t that large. I could make some food to go that surely will be better than a hospital meal, but it won’t quite have an effect.”

Josuke couldn’t come to the restaurant, not for a while - at least till he got discharged from the hospital, and that was just too long. Josuke couldn’t come see Tonio, but maybe, maybe Tonio could go see Josuke.

if the mountain won't come to Muhammad, then Muhammad must go to the mountain

Words: 5,713

Ships: Josuyasu

(Very fun read)

Summary:

Tonio loves his job, especially when he gets the opportunity to see all the happy couples in Morioh coming to his restaurant.

Words: 1,381

Ships: YES, A LOT OF THEM

(Love this fic)

Summary:

Josuke is torn over whether to bring up his crush to his friend. Tonio serves up sweet dessert and good advice.

Words: 798

Ships: Josuyasu in the making

(Very cute love when this two interact.)

Summary:

“I am Okuyasu of Motunui and we,” Okuyasu gestured between the two of them,” are going to restore the heart.

Okuyasu could only dream about touching the ocean, sailing on its gentle waves as he stares out at the endless expanse filled with so much potential. In fact, he did dream about it, until one day, he didn’t need to. It became his reality.

OR

Okuyasu was chosen by the ocean to restore the heart and he needs Josuke’s help to do it.

Words: 22,037

Ships: Josuyasu

(My first reaction to reading the tittle and summary was 'HUH?')

Summary:

Times Tonio helped Morioh out.

or

We need more fatherly tonio so here

Words: 4,572

Ships: Nope

(IT'S NOT FINISHED. Tonio I love you.)

Summary:

Jotaro feels like his stomach is sinking, because Tonio’s smile is so bright, and he’s going to ruin it.

Words: 2,101

Ships: Tonio x Jotaro. Jotonio? Tonitaro? Does this ship even have a name??? And past Jotaro x Kakyoin

(ohmygod this bitches)

Summary:

It's Okuyasu's birthday!!!! Will his friends actually remember?

Words: 3,185

Ships: Josuyasu

(AAAAAAAA this is so cute Okuyasu my boy you deserve the world)

[cocogrrrl]

rendezvous

Chapter 6: Poorly Disguised Exposition

captain yates and kyle share a conversation.

wc: 1050 no cws check the series masterlist here! previous chapter

an: i changed quite a couple detail from last chapter whoops guys so check out the last chapter again 😧 sorry 4 the shorter chapters, the next one's definitely gonna be a lot longer ! I'm almost done w the next chap :P

He took the offer.

It’s only been three days. He hasn’t gotten any major clues yet, but none of the tasks he’s been given weren't been crimes yet. They typically ranged from wearing his hair up at work to pouring himself a drink. He’d send photos of him doing them and would receive small hints like timeframes, small connections, et cetera. It wasn’t much, but every detail helped.

He felt like this was cheating, though. He’s always lived by the code that a good detective does their work independently and definitely separately from the doer of the crime. It seems that he was a bad detective then.

Kenny and Kevin had no idea of this. Even if they were people he knew he could trust, he was in a messy place. More voices could just fuel the chaos even further.

“So, how’s it going, Broflovski?” Captain Yates greeted, giving two pats on the back.

Currently, Kyle’s nose was glued onto his desk. “It’s been going well. I just need more evidence on YN. I’m sure it’s her.”

“Yeah?”

“Positive.” He sighed, looking over all the evidence again.

“You think you can give me a rundown on the case details again?”

“How come, sir?” Kyle asked confused. I mean, his captain is the one managing him. Wouldn’t he have a scope of the cases his people deal with?

“Oh, well, fuck me. I can’t be forgetful now, can’t I?” He spat with a roll of the eye.

“Sir, this is a string of murders. I don’t think this is something you can just,” he paused, a hint of judgment in the gaze he gave his higher-up. “Brush something off like that…”

“I’m sorry then.” He hissed, tone heavy in sarcasm.

He only hummed in reply, not wanting to give in submission to his boss. “Here’s the rundown of the case anyway, captain.” Well, he didn’t want to directly submit to his boss. He said, handing him the files.

“Basically,” Kyle breathed. “The string of murders around the South Park area have all been connected by, primarily, one detail: written letters on the sites. I’m not exactly sure how all these people are connected yet, unfortunately.”

“Yeah, yeah. What about the letters, though?”

“The letters, uh,” he scrambled through the bagged papers. “They were signed with the name ‘Annabel Lee.’ I assume that this isn’t the name of the person, seeing how we have zero records of anyone with that name that lives here. I believe it’s someone who likes poetry, though?”

“The fuck does poetry have to do with murder?”

“Well, you see, Edgar Allan Poe has this poem called ‘Annabel Lee,’ and it’s about love and all that other crappy destiny sad stuff. The letters at the crime scene were love letters.” This connection had come from the anonymous texter. How wonderful. His own sense of shame hung over him as he said this fact.

“Psh, whoever wrote that must be a pussy.” He said, swigging his coffee around like it had a lid on (it didn’t). ”I don’t think that the gang leader you’re catching is that big of a loser, kid.”

“I know, I know, but I got some information from a friend that she recently came back from a real bad heartbreak.” Once more, information from the texter.

A captious look from the captain struck Kyle. “So, she’s killing people because they remind her of her ex or something?”

“Well, it sounds stupid if you put it like that, but look!” He nervously spoke up. “All the people here have connections with her and her gang one way or another. I still have to collect a copy of her handwriting to have it compared. I'm sure it's her.s.”

For some stupid reason, his certainty slowly dissipated from his spine. He felt like he was withering. He’s extremely sure of himself and of what little information, don’t get him wrong, but his confidence seemed to falter whenever challenged. At least, now, though.

Despite the tough skin he seems to showcase, Kyle is a fragile man at his core. Any sort of judgment he’s faced with, he immediately starts to spiral and rethink every single decision he’s ever made. Assurance is not assured for him.

“Huh.” He nodded. The nod provided a strange feeling of gratification for him. It felt like a ‘Good job!’ sticker for Kyle. It eased all the worries that came a split second ago instantly.

Slowly regaining his confidence, he continued. “Yeah. If I’m correct, she met up with them at least 5 days prior to their deaths. Knowing how she’s our biggest threat to lower crime rates here, it might be no wonder why people have been dying left and right.”

“So from loan shark to murderer, she's only causing more crime here, huh?”

“Yes. I am a hundred percent certain. I just need the evidence.”

“Well, you go do that, kiddo.” He said, concluding their conversation as he headed back to his office.

A breath Kyle didn’t even realize he was holding was let out. He put the files back in their place and quickly found himself slumped over his desk. He didn’t know why, but that conversation felt like it took his everything just to sludge through it.

Could it have been because he hated being around Captain Yates? That his very presence next to Kyle makes him want to shrivel up and evaporate? Possibly, but unlikely.

In truth, it’s probably because of Kyle’s delicate self, but that’s something he’s not gonna touch on for now. It’s too heavy for a time when other people need him more than he could possibly need himself.

A noise swept him off of his thoughts, though. It was a notification from YN. Actually, it was quite a few messages from YN.

Speaking of which, he hadn’t really talked to you since that previous night. I mean, sure, you two messaged each other back and forth every couple of hours, but you haven’t had a full proper conversation since. He should probably ask you out soon.

April 3, 11:21 AM

yn hi brad!! the girls and i are going out tonight and i was wondering if you wanted to continue where we left off??

Huh. Seems like she did the job for him then.

next chapter.

[musical-chick-13]

What do you think is up with the male protagonist of Apothecary's Diaries???

Prefacing this by saying that I'm about two-thirds of the way through the show, so I don't really, completely know all of what Jinshi's deal is. Nonetheless, I shall try and collect my thoughts so far!

Spoilers through episode 16 of The Apothecary Diaries under the cut.

Jinshi is an odd character for me to try to define. Because I do genuinely find him annoying at times (and not just in an "All people are annoying sometimes and characters should have flaws to enrich their personalities and feel more real" kind of way), but...I don't find myself hating him.

For one, his interest in Maomao (despite her open and obvious abhorrence of a good portion of his behavior) isn't based in any of the story beats I hate that frequently accompany this kind of dynamic (i.e. "Interested guy maintains long-standing attraction toward disinterested woman"). It's not, "I hate women, except for this super special one who is my Only Equal," it's not, "She's the only person who doesn't fawn over me, so she's the only one here who isn't Completely Stupid," and it's not, "I think winning her over is a challenge that will prove how macho and cool and suave I am."

Jinshi is considered unearthly beautiful, to the point where people are constantly making passes at him, leaving him creepy gifts to express their obsession, and trying to slip him aphrodisiacs to push romantic and/or sexual contact on him. It's so bad that he can't have younger servants, no one except his older attendants (and later Maomao) is even allowed to see him when he wakes up in the morning, and he has to bar the doors to his office at night. Despite her consistent disdain toward his antics, Maomao is, paradoxically, the only person in Jinshi's relative age range who actually sees him as a person; because her hatred of his behavior means she's evaluating him for something other than his beauty. Even if she doesn't often like how he presents himself to her, her judgment of him is based on who he is and what he does, rather than how he looks.

And this lends a level of nuance to the show that I think prevents me from just being frustrated at Jinshi and that being the end of it. There's other nuance there, too: he does take his political work seriously; he obviously possesses significant analytical ability, and is pretty good at fighting, but doesn't think those qualities mean anything because he doesn't supremely excel at them (which, wow, what a mood, as the kids say); he tries to play nice with Lakan despite finding him incredibly off-putting because he knows it'll help keep things stable. Jinshi has some. Trouble. With personal boundaries (more on that in a second), but we are shown that he has some standards. He's willing to let Maomao go when he thinks that's what she wants. He seems genuinely horrified at Lakan's predatory comments about the courtesan he was attracted to, and at Maomao's story of how she got kidnapped. He pays for Maomao's removal from Verdigris House, but this only happens after he makes a comment to her about it and she says that it might be a good idea. And (at least so far, again, I haven't finished the show yet), when he takes her on as his personal servant, he never considers using that position to order her to accept his romantic advances. He definitely has some flaws (and I can understand if those flaws make him too off-putting to care about to some people). But I do recognize and respect the obvious effort that was put into making sure Jinshi doesn't come across as a one-dimensional character.

I've seen a theory that his, uh...less-than-stellar understanding of day-to-day personal boundaries are related to all of the things I mentioned above, in regard to how doggedly people keep pursuing him. (My sincerest apologies to whoever wrote that post, I tried to find it again and I can't.) And I do think this makes sense--that he internalized a lot of negative behaviors from his immediate environment and the way people act toward him. (I even think you could argue that, since beauty is so important for women in this setting--to the point where it's almost seen as a necessity--extreme physical attractiveness is more broadly viewed as a "feminine" quality. And since Jinshi possesses this """feminine""" quality, plenty of people treat him the way they would a woman: as an object to be looked at and obtained for clout.) I think it's also worth noting that Maomao only really responds positively toward him when he's not being flirty or pushy, during moments where he's being genuinely thoughtful (like the hairpin giving scene, Jinshi taking her to the infirmary after ingesting poison at the garden party, and catching her when she falls off the wall after drinking with Ah-Duo). So, between the deeper aspects of Jinshi's characterization, the fact that he does clearly have some principles, and the specific way Maomao's reactions to him are framed, I still find myself interested in seeing what will happen with him next.

All of that being said. I also frequently find myself going, "Dude. Wtf." And given my own personal preferences in characters and the types of relationships I like to see (which I will not get into because it's not particularly important and this response is already very long), I doubt that will change during these upcoming episodes.

[tezzbot]

now I'm curious, what other opinions abt the dub do you have 👀👀👀 me and my friends think karamatsu sounds like markiplier

RAY CHASE BESTIE I AM SO SORRY but no youre rightJKGHFJGH

THIS GOT LONG IM PUTTING A READMORE

i do actually really really like Ray Chase as kara but the way that Nakamura pitches his voice down for him and then when something karamatsu isnt like. prepared for or whatever happens he goes back up into his regular vocal range or sometimes a bit higher really adds to karamatsu's whole. everything HJGKHFJGH LIKE his whole identity pretty much IS performance so even his voice being part of his front is so fun to me, Ray Chase's voice feels so naturally deep and smooth that its like. his voice is Too Cool for kara yknow like his voice being Actually cool? karamatsu fucking wishes JHKGJFGHD BUT i do think he is one of the better choices that the casting directors made compared to the rest of the brothers

(AGAIN NOT SHITTING ON THESE EXTREMELY PROLIFIC AND TALENTED VA'S this is just my opinion of them as the ososan characters)

like i said before i have Absolutely zero qualms with Max Mittelman as Totty literally thats a match made in heaven I think he was perfect for the role n absolutely killed it hes so funny and from what ive seen the writers actually gave him so many good lines big ups for todo likers

Kyle McCarley as Ichimatsu i honestly havent seen much of his performance but god did he put is whole pussy into the one episode where he INSISTS they have to respect each other, hes honestly really really good at maintaining the monotone voice while also conveying a lot of emotion through his voice its pretty impressive that he can do the yellingscreaming while keeping that up, Fukuyama Jun's like. jump from monotone to YEEEAAGHHK when ichimatsu is At His Limit is really really funny so i think that these two are pretty much on par with each other while putting their own spin on how the character . i dont know. expresses himself i guess. poggers :thumbs up emoji i cant use cus im typing on desktop:

in a ranking id prob put Ray's kara here but i already did him so. just. in case u wanted to know this is where he goes to me lmfao hes pretty on par with Kyle's ichimatsu to me tbh

Billy Kametz as Osomatsu honestly worked pretty well osomatsu is the most some guy ever and when u listen its like. a little over the top(obv bc its an anime dub) but its definitely a voice youd hear and go yeah ive probably walked past someone what talks like that, again Great delivery on some lines, he does sound a lot less SillyGoofy #girl... frat bro vibes in there tbh But i mean if he was american i guess he kinda would be huh GHJFGHDF he kinda lost how cheeky he sounds in jp also like there are moments but for the most part :( also the way they wrote him (again i havent seen much but from what i Have seen) he doesnt have the same I Love My Little Brothers energy idk how to describe it they all feel like they hate each other more rghjbhjgh

Sean Chiplock ouygugh im so sorry king but also not it for Choromatsu...... casting directors, voice directors, whoever else is involved in the process, if youre gonna cast around your initial reactions to how the characters are why doesnt he sound like a fuckin nerd!!! i get that hes initally played as a Straight Man but you didnt have to Just Some Dude him make him sound like the loser he is!! even like a little nasally! i also think he sounds a little too much like Billy's Osomatsu, (which again not the va's faults i feel its a voice direction issue) when they talk at the same time its kinda hard to tell em apart which might be on me for not watching enough and getting used to it but... sorrie... no from me

Michael Sinterniklaas i have so much repect for you but.... i already said in that other post, the voice they okayed..... everything he was made to say....... no. thats not jyushimatsu. that fuckin. companion character in some fantasy anime ass voice, his whole deal in the dub is too childish imo and i get why that was their first impression but oough his character suffers so so much for it moreso than any of the others.... they massacred my guy..... and this is absolutely not a dig at Michael, ive seen his other work hes incredibly talented, just everything they got him to do as jyushimatsu makes me take critical damage in real life my hp bar drops so so much

Also i really like Cassandra Lee Morris as Totoko but I feel like she doesnt capture the flip between teehee totoko chwwaaannn and KILL KILL KILL voices that Aya Endou manages, he voice is very cutesy, but i feel like she doesnt sound mad enough when totoko gets pissed WHERE IS YOUR ANGER? YOUR RAGE??? RISE RISE RISE RISE RI

also also Keith Silverstein as iyami is honestly really good i didnt really know what to expect but i feel like hes p spot on, idk how iyami-likers feel abt him though lol ask telly or sth HJGHJ

SORRY this got long but i probably was never gonna be happy with the dub, im not gonna get too much into the writing in the localisation but ough. it is Just a comedy show to the dub writers and i can respect that, but the show means a lot to people Because of the characters and how they clearly run deeper than they appear thats a huge part of the appeal for ososan imo and i feel like a lot was lost in the translation. But! it can be pretty funny sometimes and thats all it rlly needs to be, funny haha penis anime

im gonna try and give the dub another shot, ill do me best to grit n bear through it GHJFG