#why can't feminine men exist without being turned into femboys

[asexualbuthorny]

you know what i hate?

when bitches wobify Mu Qing and make him into a twink and i especially despise it when they do it for a ship with Feng Xin.

and okay he's not as muscular and more lean (hence being describes as looking scholarly) but do y'all fucking forget the man is a martial god in his own right? by no means is that man a damsel in distress that needs Feng Xin to constantly save him. he's smart, he's cunning and yeah he had a few vulnerable moments but by no means is he a poor wet meow meow he would kick your ass and laugh at you for being a failure. and yeah he's more lithe, especially when he's constantly next to Feng Xin who is kind of hypermasculine in fandom portrayals and impo (general "gigantic masculinity" anyone?) and those two are THE SAME FUCKING HEIGHT so why is Mu Qing always drawn to be much shorter than Feng Xin. and also maybe let's factor in the fact that Mu Qing was poor when growing and likely had to go without food so the lack of proper food while growing probably had an effect on his development(this just a hc btw but still it tracks). also this whole thing kind of smells really bad when people take Mu Qing, who is described as scholarly, and feminise him. it's really giving "EUGH!!! school is for girls!! only boys play sports!! academics=lame, feminine girly, war=cool, MASCULINE, done by REAL MEN URGH!!!"

y'all saw a man who is a war good who doesn't conform to your idea of a "war god" and went "no❤️that one is a femboi catboi twink who gets bent over by that one who DOES conform to my basic, no nuance idea of a war god"

get bent xoxo

[madamepestilence]

while disclaimer this is mainly an online discourse thing and the average person in real life is going to be more normal about it, there has been an insidious shift inside the queer community about the validity of the presentation of transgender people

transgender men are expected to either be uwu smol boi woman lite tm (which is also how ftn nonbinary people are often treated) or fully transitioned bears or twinks, and other iterations of men (e.g. men who don't use hormones, men who enjoy their breasts, men who are fat) get a lot of shit for not being, "man enough," and are invariably told they're just sexualizing people for their fetish—they're supposed to be more like men

in the inverse, trans women are punished socially, politically, economically just for existing (we call this intersection transmisogyny as trans women are subject to both discrimination for being transgender and for being a woman)—trans women are considered too lewd (note how trans women are always viewed through the lens of a penis, and are always considered inherently sexual; this goes back far enough that the english word, "bad," comes from, "baeddal," which is a derogatory word for a woman with a penis—the ancient equivalent of calling someone a tranny)

when a trans woman presents and promotes femininity, they're told that they're being oversexual or that they're reinforcing misogyny/sexism for living a way that makes them feel comfortable and telling people it's okay to like femininity—they're supposed to be more like men

when a trans woman presents masculinely, they're considered gross, horrible, a threat, a potential rapist or pedophile, or just taking being trans for attention (or on the more fash side, "brainwashed to be trans,"/a sissy/a femboy/a person just transitioning because it turns them on [and for the record doing that is fine; of course you're going to have a higher libido in a body you love yourself in]), and that they should just go be men if these evil horrible "fake trannies" invade our space—they should be more like men

when trans men get called tranny, they are quite literally being compared to trans women, because trans women are inherently considered disgusting sex predators, and they should be ashamed of themselves for trying to be like them, because they're just women who should be put in their place—they'll never be like men (for the record this is ALSO transmisogyny as trans men are often socially treated as still being women, sometimes through a decent portion of their transition to manhood until they're considered, "man enough," to achieve male privilege, or will experience further transmisogyny from people who view them as disgusting hairy women [see: anti-trans propaganda from the LGB movement portraying trans men drastically differently than cis men])

and god forbid a trans woman be hairy or fat or straight (ive seen straight trans women get a lot of shit for not being gay which i can't help but feel like inherently comes from a place of internalizing them as men who should only love women, another fucked example of how trans women live in a juxtaposition of being both woman and man and consequently are subject to misogyny without being protected as a woman) or black—because transphobia is inherently rooted in racism, these are all considered to be men's traits

all classism boils down to racism, actually, but ive written a whole ass essay on that elsewhere

the very act of a woman trying to be a man is considered laughable, because they're not supposed to increase their social class—they should've just been men if they wanted those rights

and trans women? do you know why transphobia has such a heavy lens on specifically trans women? it's because the very concept of a man trying to become a woman is antithetical to white supremacy—why would anyone ever want to be a woman, why would anyone ever want to be a lesser person?

these are the kinds of things that ive been seeing filter their way from fascist philosophy and directly infiltrate the queer and trans communities and it worries the shit out of me

this bullshit philosophy is going to be used to tear us apart so we're easier to kill

alright ive kept my peace on this for a while but its frustrating the fuck out of me: transgender people are reinventing sexism and especially misogyny going after each other so hard

TME/TMA is not meant to describe someone's fucking AMAB, it's meant to describe a trans person's lived experience of whether they are subject to misogyny, not whether you're transmasc or transfem. jesus christ.

ive seen trans women get bitched at for wanting to present feminine as inherently reinforcing gender binaries as though gender isn't something you should be able to express freely and trans womens' posts get hijacked to be about men, and in turn ive seen trans men—especially black trans men like salem—get a lot of shit for being proudly fat or having breasts

you dont need to present yourself as a fucking ubermensch. do you realize what's happening here. gender essentialism is being reborn and this shit is going to be weaponized by TERFs and fascists alike (with broad overlap, if not just a venn-diagram-is-a-circle)

let's get some things clear here:

- transmisogyny, like misogynoir and transmisogynoir, are meant to describe specific intersectional oppression

- trans men can be feminine. trans women can can be masculine. this applies vice versa as well.

everyone please stop fucking fighting