#why does my work suck
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rewriting Lost cause’s pt2 again because its actual shit
#arins thoughts💭#fuck writers block#writers block#how the fuck do i write#why does my work suck#thinking abt writing a kageyama fic
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Redraw of my old master Lloyd drawing... I miss him so much :( Old drawing:
#my art#ninjago#lego ninjago#lloyd garmadon#lego ninjago fanart#ninjago lloyd#ninjago dragons rising#I hate the old drawing so muchhhh#lloyd#LIKE#there are som many things wrong#it's too... purple#Like the shading just doesn't work out#even the GREEN looks bad like how did I messed up that badly#dont get me started on the yellow oh my gooood#why does it look like that#anyway me-2 years you suck get good dumb dumb
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Decided that Arthur and John would be my subjects for some figure/rendering practice.
I think I'mma just... lie down for a bit......
God I love these bastards too much. Someone free me
#malevolent#malevolent podcast#arthur lester#john doe#jarthur#john malevolent#arthur malevolent#my art#digital art#fan art#full art#clean lines#it's a notable occasion when I actually line my work#also you dont know how many different versions of John I have gone through#why is he so difficult to draw from my head?#I like this version tho#love monster John but I suck at drawing monsters soooo
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I have now learned Kim lives 15 or so minutes away from Martinaise, and it has for some reason shattered me
I was so confident he lived an hour or 3 away 😣
#personal post#kim kitsuragi#disco elysium#20 kilometers. 20.#especially as a speedfreak he probably can drive there and back in 10#i dont know how speeding works i cant seem to do it#i try. i genuinely try.#im a failure at speeding#its very fun to put the car in neutral and go down a hill though#in that particular instance i do 40 in a 25 for like. 5 seconds#but other than that#i only do like the normal 80 in a 65 or like 50 in a 40#10 miles over the speed limit consistently#what was i talking about?#oh. yeah. kim.#my cool jacket headcanon was semi reliant on him being reluctant to drive back and change because he lives so far away#though..#why DOES he get a room at the Whirling in Rags if he lives so close?#i drive 15 minutes to work everyday and i go home past midnight pretty frequently#suck it up Kim#geez. you cant handle 15 minutes at 2 am?#that's PRIME speeding time#the roads are empty and its not like vops are gonna pull him over#if they turn on their lights Kim can just turn on his own lights like 'yeah. what are you gonna do now?'
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i think ed would feel like in theory he ought to benefit from putting on a set of noise cancelling headphones and listening to a guided meditation but every time he tries it takes approximately 30 seconds for him to start thinking “i could be listening to system of a down right now”
#‘what do they mean lie still? am i not supposed to move at ALL?’#‘why does breathing take so long? does it always take this long??’#‘this music sucks. its like enya if you sucked out all the shit that makes enya sound kind of ok.’#‘i have an itch on my arm am i allowed to get that’#‘what would it taste like if you had to suck all the enya out of enya with a straw’#‘would this be working better if i had a buttplug in’
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FUCK this thing
We (me on this current pump) deserved so much better...
do you remember how we used to run....
#i used the normal mios for years and just in the last few months of having the previous pump they switched it to the mio advance#and i got a taste for it. and god was it 10x better.#but then i switched pumps bc w insurance we can get a new one every 4ish years. and the new pump works much better in terms of blood sugar#management! and rechargability#but this motherfucker. is only compatible with the mios.#no mio advance for me#THEY TOOK MY LOVE AWAY FROM ME#IM DEVASTATED#IT'S BEEN YEARS WHY DONT THEY HAVE THIS IN MY PUMP TYPE YET :(#sierra speaks#DIABETES#type 1 diabetes#t1d#cw medical#type 1 diabetic#anyways. the mio standards suck in so many ways. i have some sort of problem when i insert them like 40% of the time#the tubing loves to get stuck in the fuckin spring mechanism#and THAT likes to get stuck.#and ive poked myself on it while either fixing it or trying to cap it#the advance? none of these issues. the tubing does not get in the way of the spring.#the needle is like safeguarded retracted up into it as a safety precaution#and it's so much more efficient in terms of space and plastic use#i never had the issues i do with the mio. especially bc like retracting the needle is a manual thing and it often gets stuck and pulls#the site and canula up. which fucks w it#anyways. im distraught#and so so tired
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the worst part is i can't even say he's wrong. they certainly did figure out how to contribute the city by joining the wrgp. but like. this is one of those things where it literally does not make sense. this is insane levels of logic. "we're not sure how to contribute to the city. we think entering a magic the gathering tournament will help." like. imagine saying that fr when your parents ask what you're going to do after you graduate college. "idk. thought i'd play card games and figure it out, man"
#yugioh 5ds#yusei fudo#anya rewatches yugioh 5ds sub#i'm cackling over this#like dude you FUCKIN SAVED THE CITY#ushio calling this out too with like ''uhm. you guys kinda saved the city? you don't have to prove anything?''#and they never fully answer why they feel they have to prove something#they just do#arguably this implies an insane level of overachieving from yusei crow and jack#since they're not satisfied with JUST saving the city#but like. it does kinda suck that neither crow nor jack got to move on from playing card games with this set up?#yusei moves on to working on the moment - that works SO MUCH with this statement#and their statements made here#i suppose if you take jack's ''the team that wins will have glory'' statement at face value him continuing to do dueling also makes sense#but it also DOESN'T because like. he ALREADY HAD glory. he's the fuckin former king#this tournament changes nothing. he continues on as if he's still trying to reach it#and it just. there's a lot with jack's writing this season i WILL NOT get into#but oh my god jack atlas is a woman to me the way she was mishandled#and crow's... a lot of it falls so fuckin flat#the three boys were ROBBED but also yusei fully never gets to ever reclaim being a teenager#he ends the series forced into a role he never once indicated he wanted#following the footsteps of his father who he never once indicated he wanted to follow the footsteps of#yusei's character suffers because the show never bothers to address this constant hero complex he has#it's never confronted in any MEANINGFUL way like atem and judai's were#atem's hero complex cost him everything in the waking the dragons arc for example#and judai's led him straight down the path of becoming the supreme king#but for yusei? it's never like. deconstructed. ever.#and it feels like suuuuch a missed moment to go hey yusei. you do not have to be the hero of the city. you are a teenage boy.#what you have done for the city IS ENOUGH you do not owe your life to everyone
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small minor-spoilery talk of deltarune chapter 3 in the tags
#chris noises#deltarune#btw dear followers listen to oh!no?ok.#///////////////////#ok so i played yesterday i finished chapter 3. im gonna replay it because BOY GEE i missed some stuff#and the entire secret boss WAAHHH i need to beat the secret boss#in the last 2 chapters it felt like you always had the option to backtrack and do stuff you didn't manage to do + the secret boss#here you have to do everything in order it was a little hard 😭#according to tom you have to get S rank in all rounds#i only managed to get a b rank in the first round cuz i suck :')#btw btw. this chapter was EVERYTHING???????????????????????????#IM IN LOVE????#and this is something most people would probably glance over but#rouxls kaard being poly is actually so important to me??#like i spent probably too much time thinking about it but. it made me so so so happy 🥹🥹🥹#representation for us polys who get absolutely no bitches 💯💯💯#AND ELNINA AND LANINO ARE SO CUUUUTE IM OBSESSED WITH THEM#THE WEATHER ALWAYS STICKS TOGETHER ‼️‼️‼️#they're my everything . they dont need a third but i wish i could be their third (rouxls ruined my chances)#and the games were so fun 🥹 genuinely#THE MUSIC IS SO GOOD. AS ALWAYS.#and holy shit tenna was so funny#AAHAHAAA THE SCENE WITH SPAMTON MADE ME LAUGH SO HARD I CRIED OH MY GODDDDD#WHAT IS THAT A RAT? SOME KIND OF CREATURE?#accurate reaction to spamton#toby fox really does write the most divorced characters ever#right i think im done for now#im currently stuck in a traffic jam :') im so late for work :')))))#god. i understand why ch3+4 were released together. chapter 3 was SO GOOD but was too short 💔💔💔#it makes sense. ok im out of tags bye LOL
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The tricky part of even thinking about writing a body swap fic is determining how much is going with the mind and soul, and what is staying behind with the physical shell.
Especially when Stands/quirks/special rap abilities/unique magic are involved.
Not that I’m thinking of writing a body swap fic, of course. Perish the thought.
#I’m lying of course#usually I know why ideas grab hold of me#a song#one of those images that pop into my head randomly that no one else says happens to them too#oh wait I do remember where this thought came from#potionology mishap trope#I swear I’m working on the malleus fic but damn malleus really does have a lot going on in his head#so much so that now I’m kinda afraid to post it#fanfic musings#also itching to return to my jjba mannequin AU#why is my brain like this#can I blame Gentaro? he’s a bad influence#but he’s so pretty#I am fond of pretty pretty men who are bad at flirting#it’s definitely flirting trust me#I also totally don’t have a post book 7 wip involving silbek riddle and ace#I refuse to ditch my sebek and ace are future besties agenda#plus they both suck at flirting#except Sebek doesn’t even know he’s flirting#he’s just being himself but it works on silver anyway#even if silver is oblivious#I just love these two sm#this post book 7 isn’t really an Adeuce fic but trust me it’s there#ace also has complicated feelings#he and Sebek are disasters in their own way#also also totally not writing a florid fic spinoff from practice makes perfect#that was also a lie of course
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Just shared some emotional thoughts and worries with a friend who is going through a similar thing I'm going through and all I got was a "Yeah" back
#why do I fucking bother#why does life suck so much right now#why can't my brain just work or process stuff#don't reblog this
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today marks another birthday for this sweet, wonderful, kind, and amazing creature that goes by the name Żmija. nearly popping out in the fall, but with her heart as hot and impatient as the sun of july morning, she rushed for the last days of summer where she truly belongs - so of course, a summertime portrait it is :-)
wishing you the happiest and most love-filled of celebrations, @slavicafire -from yours truly and yours forever :-)
#scheduled as usual since im not here. hence the hour of posting - sorry; i know you dont like when i do that!#but i hope it will find you still.#sorry i couldnt do justice to your tattoos - god they look wonky but i SUCK at those so bad everytime!!!!#anyway. hope u have a wonderful monday and that bday package got to you all safe and on time! kocham cie bardzo bardzo mocno!#rysunki#also now that i look at it while scheduling. god did i draw you too pale. or is it just my laptops screen settings. god i hope its my lapto#oh good god and tumblr says its scheduled for 17th even tho i keep changing it to 18th. oh god#please forgive me if for some reason it will be posted a day early.... on app it says 18th but here...#oh god i changed the timezone on my blog to warsaw and everything why does it still say 17th!!!!!!!!!!!!!#ill try to fix that later im so sorry if it doesnt work out
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observing that there might be a connection between significant levels of pain and poor mood
#trying to unobserve the significant pain meaning anything#telling stories to ourselves about that time we went for a month without sleep and every day felt on top of the world#which happened a month ago. a month ago#but might as well have never existed this is ALL that has ever been#clearly we're dying. there's no other explanation#nerve pinch? more like acute spine cancer#chronic pain#I'm also sure there's NO correlation whatsoever between 'a month without sleep and every day on top of the world'#and present state of acute everything is fucking breaking in this body#these things could not be related#disability#I just want this to stop honestly#it's the kind of shit that a painkiller apparently can't tackle#because wowee why would I want relief#and I recognise if I moved it might get better#but at the same time I'm tired of having to do something all of the time to cope with this#I just want it to stop and fuck off#I want to think of literally ANYTHING else#but my whole body is just. burning#every muscle is on fire and aches like we have a high fever#our fingers are so fucking stiff#moving our back is just this chorus of sandy crackles#surely it could not be arthritis#at this rate going to turn on Gladiator II just for the emotional support fellow chronic illness sufferer#Caracalla you're the only thing right now that makes this suck any less#doctor: so how does that work exactly#us: don't know and not going to examine it further
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Was trying to like. Imagine how a step-mother Penelope/step-daughter Athanasia AU would work. Claude would either never know about Penelope’s affair (or at least does not suspect about the pregnancy. Somehow) or would be so blinded by grief after Diana’s death that he would just pathetically accept Penelope back.
Obviously she could not pass Jennette as Claude’s so ..?? She would probably huh. Keep her as her forever dirty little secret or eventual pawn to use (maybe she is passed off as countess rosalia’s daughter?).
Her relationship with Athanasia would depend a lot on whether Athy is still reincarnated or not but I guess Penelope would either roll with Claude’s mistreatment of her (and probably have him disinherit her because she is, after all, his low-born bastard) or play the kind step-mother for politics (and the rest would also depend on whether or not they do have children together later on. maybe Anastasius using her as his black magic baby machine fucked her body up). Just imagine. The drama
Anyways this is what inspired the brainworms lol
#should I tag this#lithi?! wmmap posting?! in 2024??? it’s most likely than you think#eh#who made me a princess#I think Athy and Penelope in this AU would have like a sort of. mh. Rhaenyra-Alicent relationship#athanasia de alger obelia#claude de alger obelia#Penelope Judith#huh… Aemma-Diana. Viserys-Claude. why does all of this work so well#I’m so smart <- (?)#aka AU where Athy and Penelope have the most epic royal court drama while Claude mops in the background#and Jennette is happily playing in the dirt somewhere far away#BUT maybe Claude knows/suspects about Jennette but again he is so pathetic and sad and what not he just accepts Penny back#and like Penelope would obviously try to have kids with Claude to have more legitimacy but maybe Claude is just not down for fucking lol#and like I said Penelope could have some after effects of Anastasius’ black magics and she just can’t have children anymore#so she’s just kind of stuck between having to suck up to her husband’s bastard#or trying to put her own bastard on the throne lol#because well yes Jennette is also a bastard#a lot would also depend on Anastasius being alive like in the manhwa or not#and Penelope knowing about it#I’m not much of an Ana fan so since this is my AU I choose to say he’s dead
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