#wonho mafia

[miabebe]

I Am What I Am (I)

A man of the shadows and a woman who belonged in the skies - fate could not have brought two more different people together. But was this fate or was this a choice?

Pairing - Im Changkyun x OC

Word Count - 6.3K

Warnings - Mentions of blood, guns, kidnapping, possible violence, a make out scene or two?

Chapter summary - Na bi, who gets briefly pulled into the world of shadows, drowns further in it with every step she takes. After all, he did say 'You'll come back to me.'

Masterlist

The smell of gasoline was undeniably lingering in the air. The mud under her shoes was thick and wet, consistent with the sound of the rain echoing in the silence. The rope on her wrists was starting to burn into her skin and the heat of the car disappeared behind her as she got dragged into the darkness. It sounded like she was accompanied by three sets of footsteps. Or was it four? She couldn’t really tell. A sudden jerking motion threw her against what felt like a chair, her back hitting the wood, eliciting an involuntary groan. 

She had seen and heard enough about Seoul to tell she was going to die today – she just didn’t know how or why. All she wanted was a bottle of juice. Though pouring rains had taken over the city, she was feeling unusually dehydrated. A simple detour to the grocery store after work, somehow ended with an opaque bag over her head and her body shoved into a van, the dim streetlights being the only witness. I should’ve just gone straight home. 

Throughout the ride, to her own surprise, she sat unusually still. It was a fight or flight situation; her survival instincts should have kicked in; she should’ve done something but she simply froze. She couldn’t move, couldn’t think, couldn’t do anything to save herself. She was never really scared of the unknown or the darkness but today? Today the black was somehow stifling. Having that bag over her head finally taken off didn’t help much either - darkness was soon going to be a constant in her life anyways. 

Her eyes struggled to adjust to the very dim, barely visible surroundings of what seemed like an old abandoned warehouse, streams of light and rain making their way from scattered holes in the roof. Textbook kidnapping location, what a dramatic way to go indeed. There were people all around her; definitely more than four, perhaps around twenty? but they all stood half hidden in the shadows, visible only waist down, light particularly shining off those combat boots they all seemingly had in common.  

Her cold sweat was replaced by the cold metal of a gun pressed against her cheek, turning her head towards its wielder. His frame blocked nearly her entire visual field – he was tall and broad, looming over her, his golden tresses falling into his cold eyes. Thank god his vest didn’t have sleeves because his biceps looked like they would have ripped right through the fabric. She knew he could knock her out cold with barely a swing of his arm, so she told herself to be very careful about when and how she opened her mouth before him. But that warning to herself barely sustained for a minute.  

Suddenly, a light was flashed on her face, making her wince and look away but grabbing her face, the blonde man forced her to meet his eyes again, frowning in confusion.  

“Who are you?”  

She blinked at him rapidly, not being able to fathom if she misheard him or he had indeed just asked her the dumbest question possible. The uncomfortable series of whispers that went around like something was not right. Did they…. Did they make a mistake? Was she not the one they meant to kidnap tonight?  

Her perpetrator turned towards the darkness at the far end of the room, talking to it, his voice ever so slightly shaking. “We were outside the hospital all afternoon; we had our eyes on her for hours. I don’t know how this happened…” He turned back, his eyes void of even the slightest tinge of guilt – they blazed with anger. “I asked who the hell are you.”  

How dare he. How dare he be mad at her like it was her fault she was sitting tied up in this chair. Like she was the one who fucked up.  

He wasn’t patient enough for an answer. She wasn’t planning on giving him one anyways.  

She watched as a woman walked up with her bag, emptying its content onto the floor carelessly, eyes skimming over her discarded things. Spotting a wallet she reached for it, scouring through and then tossed a card to the blonde man who held it under the light. “Baek Na Bi” He frowned. “Emergency medicine, Seoul National University Hospital…..”  

Na bi spat the blood-tinged spit pooling in her mouth on the wet mud around her. “So you’re not blind.” She looked at him, anger bubbling in her chest. “Just devoid of human intelligence then.”  

“Shut up.” He snarled, his gaze on her hardening as did his grip on the gun. Of all the ways one could die, Na bi was sure hers was going to be the most deservedly pointless one. 

“Or what?” Her eyes flickered to his gun and back. “You’ll stalk, kidnap and threaten me? Oh wait, you’ve already done all of the above.”   

“There is a fourth option on the list.” She felt his gun right in the middle of her chest, the nose of it digging into her sternum. “Don’t push me to do it.”  

Na bi tried not to swallow the phantom lump in her throat or let the defiance in her eyes die out. Thankfully for her, a sound from the shadows turned the blonde man’s attention away - The sound of a lighter click. 

“We made a mistake.” His otherwise harsh voice had a tinge of fear yet again. “It was dark and they look so alike I- “ 

“They look nothing alike.” An unfamiliar low voice echoed across the warehouse. Na bi tried to look through the darkness, searching for its owner but all she saw was a small dancing flame.  

“We can still find her.” The blonde man stashed his gun back in its holster, his hands searching his pockets for a minute before he pulled out a photo. “They work in the same hospital, maybe they know each other.”  

Turning to her, he held it up in front of her face, shining light on it. “Who is this?”  

Na bi didn’t know what good resistance was going to do for her but at this moment she did not feel like being of any use to him at all. She continued stubbornly staring at him, making him grab her face once more, forcing it to turn towards the photo in his other hand. Na Bi squinted at what seemed like a picture captured from a security cam of a woman maybe in her mid-twenties, face half hidden under her cap but still revealing the brown eyes that matched her brown hair…... Ana. 

“Don’t know.” She pulled herself away from his grip. “I don’t know who she-.”  

“She knows.”  

The voice from the shadows sent a chill down her spine. Na Bi thought she did an excellent job of concealing her shock on seeing Ana. She was only betrayed by the very slight widening of her eyes, a momentary slip he caught from all the way across the space. Denial was going to be futile. 

“Why are you looking for her?” 

The blonde man narrowed his eyes at her. “You’re in no position to ask questions.” 

“If not for your incapability, I would not be in this position.”  

Na bi could practically hear his jaw tighten, letting her know she was mere seconds from being hurt real bad but before he could do anything, the low voice boomed across the warehouse.  

“Wonho.” 

So that was blondie’s name. And a warning too. 

Wonho immediately took a step back and Na bi realised belatedly - the man in the shadows was the leader. She felt herself stiffen at the sound of him walking ahead. More accurately, at the sound of his shoes, which she noticed were not combat boots like the rest but a pair of dress shoes that appeared in the light when he neared.  

“I’m looking for some answers Ms. Baek. I just want a conversation.”  

“What could she possibly know that’s of interest to you?”  

“To begin with, on who’s orders has she been going around looking for me.”  

Na bi raised an eyebrow in disbelief. “She’s looking for you?”  

“It appears so. But no one simply looks for me Ms. Baek.” The click of the lighter resounded in the silence, this time the tiny flame briefly illuminated what looked like a grey shirt. “I’m the one who hunts.” 

Na bi scoffed incredulously. “Not so good at it, are you? Clearly you can’t even pick the right prey.”  

He hummed; a tinge of amusement laced in it. Wonho though, stared at her like he had just mentally put a dozen bullets through her. Na bi didn’t care; aggravating him felt alleviating for some reason. Besides, she didn’t think he would actually do anything without instruction from the man in the shadows and strangely, it didn’t feel like he wanted to hurt her.  

She knew how stupid that thought was. She knew what it meant to be kidnapped in this city – it was a one-way road; no one ever came back. Even though she was not the right target, she was a liability, a risk factor roaming on the streets. As much as she hoped and prayed, there was no way they were going to let her go tonight; her fate was sealed.  

“Let her go.” 

Na bi felt herself choke on nothing, launching into a coughing fit, thrown off by his words. If she didn’t see the sheer shock in Wonho’s face, she would have thought she misheard him but the blonde man took both a hesitating and obedient step towards her and with a small pocket knife, cut the ropes binding her hands. She rubbed her wrists ignoring the sharp pain in her shoulders. 

“You’re… you’re letting me go?” 

Though she had accurately predicted the lighter click to follow, she did not expect to hear a smile in his voice. “You’ll come back to me.” 

To this hell hole? “And why would I do that?” 

He didn’t answer.  

Giving her barely a minute to gather her discarded things, Wonho pulled her up to her feet impatiently. As she was led out, she heard footsteps receding into the darkness behind her and as much as she was surprised, sceptical and relieved all at once to be walking out of here alive, when the bag made its way back over her head, a part of her was disappointed to not being able to put a face to the voice that was ringing in her ears. 

You’ll come back to me. 

“I won’t.” She muttered as she was shoved back into the van.

Na Bi looked at herself in the mirror as she stepped out of the shower. She was a mess. 

As if her job as an ER resident did not contribute enough to her ever so permanent dark circles, last night’s events further threw her into a sleepless night. Pushing her bangs up, she ran her fingers over the bruise on her forehead. She did put up quite a struggle when she was being forced into the van but in vain. She was no match for those clearly trained hands that were tying her up - The scars on her wrists were still burning. Letting her fringes carefully cover the bruise on her head, she pulled her hair into a ponytail, eyes glancing at her phone for the hundredth time this morning. There was still no response from Ana.  

Last night, when Wonho had kicked her out of the van onto the street by her house, he had given her a warning loud and clear. “If you know what’s best for you, you’ll forget tonight ever happened.” Heart racing in her chest as she entered the home she never thought she would see again, Na bi neatly ignored his words and called Ana immediately. Sure, the two of them weren’t really close and barely knew each other but how was she supposed to just stay quiet when someone was in danger? She had to warn her at least, tell her that some very sketchy people were out there looking for her, but every call she made went straight to voicemail. Not knowing what else to do, she left her a bunch of messages, explaining the situation and it had been hours but there was still no response.  

Na bi looked up at the face in the mirror, her brown eyes reminding her of Ana. She was often told that the two of them looked similar but she could never see how. Yes, they had the same brown eyes and wavy brown hair but other than that, they were nothing alike. Ana looked angelic. She had such kind, warm eyes, a beautiful smile; she was the kind that stood out in a crowd, making heads turn as she walked by. Na Bi on the other hand was as ordinary as could be. Not so pale skin, tired eyes, tired posture, average height, average looks. Nothing about her was really noticeable…..except maybe her lips. She was told more than often that she had very irresistible lips but it was usually in very drunk and desperate settings so she never really took it seriously.  

Throwing on an old t shirt and a pair of ripped jeans, Na bi dressed herself to work, eyes and mind still on her phone. From what she understood, it seemed like those men knew they could find Ana at the hospital. If Ana was lucky and Na bi was not too late, then maybe she could find Ana at work and warn her before they got to her. The man in the shadows did say all he wanted was a conversation but honesty was not exactly the defining factor of men who hid in the dark behind their guns. There was no reason to believe that Ana was not in danger from him.  

Then again, he did let her go. 

Na bi might not have seen his face or know who he was but she knew of their intentions, she had seen their hide out, she had seen enough. She was exactly the kind of loose ends that people like them made sure to clean up. They should have done away with her and ended this instead her she was, safe and alive. Either they were not smart enough to realise just how risky it was for them to let her go or they were somehow capable of some form of humane reasoning and had spared her considering picking her was their mistake. Na bi didn’t think either were possible, which meant there was something else she was missing here.  

And those words of his kept ringing in her ears. 

“You’ll come back to me.” 

“I won’t.” She stubbornly muttered again to no one in particular and stepped out of her house into the darkness before dawn.  

Two hours later, Na bi found herself standing in front of apartment number 186. 

The moment she reached the hospital, she hastened to the oncology ward, looking for Ana. To her surprise, it had been days since Ana came to work and no one had heard from her in quite a while. Something was not right. Na bi immediately got a nurse to look up Ana’s hospital records for any alternative forms of contact but suspiciously, there were none - no emergency contact, no family members mentioned, no workplace hotline, but there was an address. Quickly scribbling it on a post-it note, she dropped a message to her attending about an upset stomach and left the hospital. After a 20-minute bus ride, a short walk and a ride up the elevator, Na bi was finally standing in front of the door number on her paper, praying Ana was in there.  

She wasn’t picking calls and hadn’t been seen for days – the idea of finding her in her home was hopeful but given this was Seoul, it was not realistic. And Na bi’s gut feeling was right. No matter how many times she rang the doorbell, there was no response; no one was home. She had a feeling the trip here would be pointless but maybe it wasn’t that futile after all because just as she turned to leave, a chilly wind brushed her arm and Na bi traced its source to a small crack between the door and the frame. It was open. 

Without much thought, she pushed the door and stepped in. Na bi didn’t know what exactly she was expecting to find in here, but everything seemed….. fine? At least at first sight, till she noticed the details. 

The dishes in the sink were giving off a repulsive smell, the trash clearly hadn’t been cleared in very long. There was a bowl of cereal and milk which seemed like it was sitting on the counter for days now. The fruits in the bowl had rotten and the bread loaf on the table was way past its expiry date. To simply put it, it seemed like no one had been here in quite some time. There were no signs of struggle or injury though, no smell of blood. But there were two fading, faint lines made perhaps by suitcase wheels, leading from the door to the cupboard in the room. 

Na Bi walked in and opened the wardrobe, immediately noticing it was almost empty. Her eyes skimmed over the remaining contents, mentally noting that there were no pants, not many t shirts and no inner wear at all. She did notice a white shirt that clearly belonged to someone much bigger than Ana - a man's, perhaps a partner? Na bi didn't know Ana had a partner but then again, she didn't even know Ana that well.  

One thing was evident though. Given how things were left in the house and that clothes and even cash was missing, Na bi could tell Ana was on the run, perhaps for days now. Maybe she already knew the man in the shadows would come looking for her. Maybe she made sure to disappear before she was caught.  

As much as Na bi was curious, there was no time to speculate – the front door creaked; someone else was here. 

Following her instinct, she quickly climbed into the cupboard, closing the doors as softly as she could, covering her mouth tight to not let even the soft sound of her breathing be heard. She watched through the tiny air vents of the cupboard as two men she had never seen before walked in, armed with guns, looking around. 

“See, there’s no one here.” 

“But I swear I saw her. A brown-haired woman walked into the building-" 

“Hundreds of people live in this apartment; it was clearly someone else. Where’s your head at, are you drinking on the job?” 

“Of course, I wasn’t…It really looked like Ana….” The shorter of the two looked around, first confused then disgusted. “Every time I come in here, I forget how terrible the smell is. Why can’t we get someone to clear the trash? Those bananas especially- ” 

“Boss said nothing here was to be touched remember? Just do your job. Watch the place as you were instructed.” 

“But it’s terribly boring…” 

And the voices faded away, perhaps as they left, allowing Na Bi to loosen her tense muscles just before they began to cramp. She gave it a good ten-minute grace period to make sure they were truly gone and climbed out of the closet. Thinking fast, she quickly stripped out of the shirt she was wearing, stuffed it into her own bag and pulled one of Ana’s pink sweaters over her head. She then grabbed a cap that was lying in there and put it on, tucking her hair into it. Without wasting much time, she left the house, leaving the door the way she found it and got into the elevator. Looking at her fuzzy reflection in the silver of the walls, she adjusted her clothes and put on a mask to hide her face just before it opened at the ground floor, revealing the two men from earlier standing right there. 

They looked at her but Na bi didn't panic - she made sure they wouldn’t recognise her, there was no reason to be worried but she held her breath nevertheless as she walked past the oblivious men, still arguing about their ‘job’. Head down, she made her way out of the gates and onto the street, processing all the information and most importantly, her biggest observation – those two men, they were not wearing combat boots.  

That meant someone else was looking for Ana as well. Someone who already knew who she was and where she lived and by the look of their guns, someone who was equally dangerous. Clearly this whole deal was a lot bigger than Na bi had ever imagined and like an idiot, she had just walked herself straight into the mess. 

And also, into the rock-hard chest of a very familiar man. 

She looked up, rubbing her hurting forehead to see the man standing with his arms behind his back, a disapproving look all over his face. Wonho. And over his shoulder, Na Bi saw a black van. Fuck, don’t tell me- 

And sure enough, she was grabbed by her wrist and shoved into the van before it sped off. 

10 days later. 

“Are you sure you want another drink? You’ve had quite a few tonight.” 

Na Bi raised her head and looked at the bartender through her hooded, heavy eyes. 

“Just pour what I’m paying you for.” She slurred. 

The man shook his head disapprovingly before placing a shot glass with pretty, pink coloured drink on the counter. “You don’t have to pay; the gentleman there already did.” 

Na Bi rolled her head back lazily and looked in the direction he was pointing at. Like any other drunk woman, she was used to being approached by all kinds of men in the bar but she usually didn't care much. Though it didn’t take much to bring her inhibitions down, she was always in control of herself and a woman who knew what she wanted. The older men she refused, the younger ones she laughed at, the sleazy ones she steered clear of. But very rarely, a captivating one like him would appear and Na bi did not think she minded this one.  

She got up with her drink, a bit too tipsy to fix her shorts that were far too up her thighs and made her way to this so-called gentleman sitting on the bar stool, further down from her. She found herself a place between his manspread, her eyes running from his long, bared neck to his only partially concealed chest. His eyes though, were fixed on her mouth. She knew he wanted it but what was the rush? 

“Why this drink?” 

“Try it.” He half shouted over the music, so she raised her glass to down it, the warm liquid pleasantly burning her throat. 

“I like it.” She licked her lips, knowing his eyes were fixed there. When they flickered up to meet hers, she felt hot under his gaze. 

“I like you.” Uh oh, too cheesy. 

Na Bi was decently good at reading people which meant she saw right through him. He was incredibly handsome, with the kind of built that probably had women fawning over him all the time, but looking at his soft doe eyes, how his hands didn’t even try to touch her yet and his terrible way with words, she could tell approaching women was not something he did often. Normally Na bi wouldn't have done the following, but today, something pushed her to.  

Setting her glass down on the counter, she slowly took his hands and wrapped them around her waist before letting her own go round his neck, fingers making their way into his hair. With just millimetres between them, hot breaths mingling, she expected to feel her pulse quicken, like his did, in the veins of his neck. What she wasn’t expecting was how fast his mouth found hers, latching almost hungrily, like it waited too long. He felt like a strange ecstasy, lips, tongue, teeth, all of it, her stomach knotting like she was plummeting from a height as he pressed her up against himself harder. 

Noticing his hands starting to get more daring on her body, much to his surprise she pulled herself from him and walked away, past the dancing crowd to the edge of the club. He watched as she stopped right by the washrooms and turned to him, beckoning him with her finger. His lips breaking into a small smirk, he followed, somehow getting more urgent with each step until he reached her, pushing her back, trapping her between the wall and his mouth.  

“You’re so fucking hot, I could take you right here.”  

Na bi chuckled at his unexpected desperation, a snide response dancing at the tip of her tongue but it was lost when his mouth moved down her neck and his hands found her ass. Biting back a moan, she revelled in the feeling of his mouth on her, not caring about the many judging eyes she met over his shoulder. Until she saw them.  

Two pairs of combat boots. In the middle of the dance floor. Watching her unblinking.  

Na bi immediately stiffened and it did not go unnoticed by the man before her who pulled back, looking tensed.  

“Is something wrong?”  

“No, I uh…” Her head slightly spinning, she shook it. “I think I need water. Could you get me some?” 

Making sure she was okay once again, he left for the bar, allowing Na bi to look around, observing her surroundings that were starting to turn hazy. They seemed to be the only pair of combat boots around and maybe the alcohol was seriously affecting her judgement but she had enough. Turning on her heel, she quickly walked past the washrooms to the back door of the club, swung it open and stepped out. As expected, the two men instantly followed her but when they stepped out after her, she wasn’t there.

As the door shut, Na bi who had hidden herself behind it, grabbed a discarded metal rod and took a swing at the man closer to her, knocking him out in an instant. His partner immediately turned, his gun pointing right at her but even drunk, she was faster than him, striking him with the same rod, his gun dropping to the ground. Within a second, the tables had turned.  

Na bi had possession of the gun, as the man across her stood with his hands in the air, the slightest tinge of fear in his eyes.  

“Keys.” Na bi held out her hand. “Car keys.”  

Reaching for his back pocket, he took out a bunch of keys and handed it to her slowly.  

“Where’s the car?” She raised an eyebrow, repeating when all her gave her was silence. “Where is it?” 

“Near the entrance.”  

“Do you have a phone?” He shook his head. Sighing Na bi tossed him her phone which he caught frowning in confusion. “9963. Unlock it.”  

He complied, holding up the phone to show her. 

“Good. Does this gun have a silencer?” This time he nodded. “Then I suggest you act fast. Ambulances take time on Friday nights and this guy has 20 minutes before he bleeds out.”  

And without a warning, she aimed the gun at the leg of his partner lying unconscious on the road and took a shot, blood instantly gushing out. Stashing the gun behind her, Na bi ran towards the entrance, without even so much as looking back at what she had done. Reaching the parking lot, she let the sound of the car unlocking to lead her to a black Mercedes and got in, immediately turning on the engine, driving away from the dark of the night to where it was darkest.  

It had been a little over a week since Na bi’s little visit to Ana’s house.

That day when she was shoved into the van again, everything made sense - this was why they had let her go. They had expected her to contact Ana to warn her and so evidently, they had their eyes on her the whole time, waiting for her to make a move. Lucky for them, within 24 hours, they went from not knowing a thing about Ana’s identity right to discovering where she lived.  

Na bi had underestimated them; she knew something bigger was at play yet she allowed her emotions to cloud her judgement and now she was truly done for. She had given them what they wanted; she was of no use anymore. She accepted that finally her time had come to an end but turned out, she was wrong again. Instead of the warehouse, Na bi found herself being tossed onto the street near her house once more and the black van sped off once before Wonho gave her yet another warning.  

“Third time’s a charm Baek. I might not be so merciful if I see you again. Stay away from where you don’t belong.”  

Anyone in her place would have thanked their stars for getting not one, but two chances to live but Na bi felt an unwarranted anger. The first time they let her go, they had an agenda. They used her to their advantage which meant this time too, they were up to something. Na bi hated the how they kept playing her but the truth was, no matter how many ways she tried to analyse the situation, she had no idea what they wanted from her now. The only one who could put her mind to ease by giving an explanation was the man in the shadows and with a bitter taste in her mouth, Na bi remembered that he predicted she would go back to him.  

“You’ll come back to me.” 

Recalling the sheer confidence in his voice, Na bi promised herself to do anything but that. He was clearly playing some mind game with her and she was not going to fall for it again. 

As far as Ana was concerned, after a lot of contemplation, Na bi decided to go to the cops. After all, that was what any logical, reasonable person in her place would and should do. There was more than one group of dangerous people looking for her and it was only a matter of time before they managed to find her; only the law could help Ana now. But the next afternoon, the moment Na bi stepped into the police station closest to the hospital, she realised that yet again, she was wrong.

Sitting right there on the bench was a widely built man dressed in a black shirt and olive-green pants, tapping away his foot on the concrete floor. His combat boot clad foot. Before he looked up and caught her eye, Na bi looked away as though she didn’t notice him there at all. When a cop approached asking why she was here, thinking fast, she took out the largest bill she could find in her wallet and handed it to him, claiming she found it on the street and left immediately.  

Of course the man in the shadows had his men in the police station. Criminals always made sure to stay close to law enforcement - prevention was after all better than cure. Na bi sighed in relief, glad that she was quick enough to notice the man. Had she given her statement, she would have turned from a mere risk factor to an actual threat and the man in the shadows definitely could not be benevolent or dumb enough to let her walk away with that. As much as she hated to admit, there was nothing Na bi could do to help Ana anymore – the time had come to forget any of this ever happened.  

Except they wouldn’t let her.  

The first time she noticed was that night when she went to close the curtains of her window – standing right across her building on the street was a man leaning against the lamp post smoking his cigarette, the combat boots evident on his feet. Though she felt like her heart was in mouth, Na bi simply drew the curtains and told herself to calm down. She was tired and lived four floors above the ground floor, maybe she was just not seeing right. But the next morning when she left her building, Na bi knew she didn’t make a mistake – he was still there and he was definitely wearing combat boots. Turning up her senses to high alert, Na bi made her way to work and realised much to her horror, the men in combat boots were everywhere – on the roads she walked, in the trains she took, the bakery where she grabbed her breakfast, the library where she worked on her papers and even in her workplace, one sitting aimlessly in the visitor lounge and another with an IV line hooked up for ‘dehydration’.  

Na bi was wrong once more. It wasn’t the police station they had their eye on, it was her they were watching. More than just watching actually. She could tell her mail had been opened and checked before she got to it. The newfound buzzing sound in the background of all her calls meant her phone was being tapped. She was being monitored round the clock.  

Na bi tried her best to behave like she didn’t notice anything. She still had no idea what these men wanted from her so she knew had to make her every move carefully – she was not going to be their little scapegoat yet again. Though as days passed, it got more and more hard to pretend. Not only was the feeling of constantly being watched invasive, intrusive and extremely uncomfortable, the fact that Na bi still couldn’t fathom why the hell they were doing it was driving her up the wall. But she held it in and let her despisal for ignorance take a backseat while they continued to treat her privacy like it was nothing.  

And now, after whole week and a half, she had finally reached her limit. It had been a few very draining days at both work and in her personal life and after weeks, she had come out with some colleagues to wind down, so to see those men watching her when she was having a preferably private moment was just – 

Na Bi slammed the brakes as she reached her destination. The man at the bar. She had forgotten all about him and left without an explanation. A slight guilt rose in her chest but it quickly died down. She didn't owe him anything - he was company for just a bit, a momentary escape, an illusion before she threw herself back into her regular life. After the days she had, she badly needed a break from everything but here she was instead, in front of the large doors of the warehouse where it all began. 

You’ll come back to me.  

She stumbled out of the car, her footing trying its best after all the drinks she had tonight and walked up to the metal doors, pushing them open. Standing right in the middle of a familiar scenery was Wonho, who’s eyes narrowed at her first in suspicion, then annoyance.  

“How the hell did you find this place?”  

“Wasn’t so hard.” Na bi pointed around vaguely. “Looks like a warehouse, reeks of gasoline, mud on my shoes from that night was coal black. Considering It took 30 minutes at average speed when you brought me back home and there were barely any stops on the way means no traffic signals, means highway, means outskirts. Combine all that and there was only one abandoned car engine factory that fit the profile.”  

When the weight of her words sunk in, Wonho chuckled. “You’re smart.”  

“I know.”  

“But not smart enough.” He walked up her. “You found a way in but do you have a way out?”  

Na bi reached for the gun stashed behind her back and pulled it out, pointing it right at Wonho’s chest, history repeating itself, just a little differently. Immediately she heard the click of at least 40 guns, men and women finally stepping out from the shadows around, their weapons aimed right at her.  

“Now now, let’s not be hasty.” She threw the gun down in the mud, holding her hands up. “I just want to talk.”  

“Conversations don’t interest me.”  

“I don’t need long. Actually, I can’t take long. You see, I just left a party about 20 minutes ago without informing anyone. Now the amazing people that my friends are, the longer I’m missing, the more likely they are to try to locate me by tracking my phone, which, I should let you know, is with two of your men who are in a very unexplainable, compromising situation right now. So, before it becomes a scene and the cops get involved and this whole thing spirals out of your control and mine, I suggest you let me get my answers and let me go.”  

Wonho laughed but when his subordinate walked up and whispered something in his ear, the smile was wiped off his face, landing on Na bi’s instead. Her claim had been verified. 

“What do you want to know?”  

Na bi shook her head, instantly regretting it when her head started spinning. “Not you. I want to talk to your boss.” Wonho stiffened, making her click her tongue. She knew she didn’t have long before all those drinks in her body betrayed her. “Tick tock.” 

Sighing he moved out of the way, his voice disgruntled. “Straight down, door on the left.”  

Taking a deep breath, Na bi followed his instructions and a big white door loomed into sight. Every part of what she was doing was stupid and reckless and insane but it was too late. She had come too far for answers, she just had to go a little further. Ignoring the way everything around her was spinning, she opened the door and stepped in.     

Na Bi didn’t know what she expecting to see in here. Her best guess was something straight out of the Godfather movie. Some sort of luxuriously decorated room with a middle-aged man sitting on a velvet couch drinking whiskey on the rocks. But the sight before her was nothing like that. It was a small, simple, dimly lit room with empty white walls, just a wooden table and chair in the middle and in front of it was a young man with his back to her. He was tall and lean, putting on a black vest over his white shirt, looking at her over his shoulder, the long fringes of his hair covering most of his face. 

“You came back Ms. Baek.”  

He turned, walking up to her, finally appearing in the light and Na bi felt her lips part wordlessly.  

He was beautiful. Beautiful in a way dangerous things were. Skin pale like it had never seen the light of day starkly contrasting his jet-black hair pushed back in a way that framed his face so appropriately. His eyes were empty but also saying a hundred unknown things at once. Her gaze wandered down his sharp nose and thin, blood red lips and Na Bi felt like she finally understood what people meant when they told her lips were captivating. There was nothing more she wanted to do than feel them just once, her hand unknown to her, reaching for it. 

He took a step back, moving away but she held him by collar and pulled him back towards her, their faces inches away from each other. If Na Bi thought she felt electricity with any other man in her life, what she felt with him was feral. The attraction was inexplicable and illogical and inappropriate.  

“Sorry, I don’t know why I just really wanted to….” She let him go, stumbling back, feeling her knees starting to give away. “Who… who are you?”  

A whole minute passed before he decided to answer. “I.M”

“Hmm, you are?”  

The edges of his lips curved into a small smile. “I am Changkyun.”   

Next Chapter

[bangchanshehe]

The Trespasser pt. 26

You were on top of the world with the new title of leader of your family’s clan. You were the strongest clan in all of the orient and you were proud. But your family feels that there are threats still lurking around making you a target. When they introduce you to a potential man for a business and marriage merger will it help your clan or make matters worse?

Wonho x Reader, Shownu x Reader, Jooheon x Reader

The next morning you woke up feeling groggy and tired. The entire night you kept thinking about Hoseok wondering, did he get home okay? He’s not hurt right? Why was he so drunk? Why did he have to come here of all places? Did he really mean what he said last night? And although your mind kept telling you that it was just a drunken mishap, your heart wanted to fully believe that he had come for you. It made your mind wonder if he was doing as horribly as you had been. If he was feeling like an emotional zombie, focusing only on work, and just getting through the next day like you had been doing.  But once again your brain had reared its ugly head and told you that he hadn’t, that it was just a mistake and that he only said those things because he was so drunk.

You let out a loud yawn and stretched in bed feeling your sheets glide across your skin before you reached over to find your phone on your nightstand. You clicked the lock button once to see what time it was only to find that you had close to a dozen notifications from your mother alone. You quickly unlocked your phone and rummaged through the messages and missed calls.

4 New Messages, 6 Missed calls…

Mom: You had better give me a damn good explanation as to why I heard that you and Hoseok decided to end things

Mom:  Your father is beyond pissed!!!

Mom: If you want to ever come over here again you better pick up the phone!

Mom: Fine!

You let out a loud sigh and pinched the bridge of your nose. In the mix of everything that had been going on you had tried so hard to maintain appearances so that you could explain to your parents what had happened on your own terms, and not when wounds were still so fresh.

You got up and immediately went to the bathroom to freshen up before you subjected yourself to the emotional warfare that was your mother on the phone. and while you sat on the toilet you stared down at the pad that remained completely clean after your night’s rest. You gently ripped the pad away and wadded it up in toilet tissue before you threw it away.

“it’s finally done” you whispered softly to yourself as you stared at it in the trash can. There was a particularly enslaving feeling that overwhelmed you as you looked down into the bin. Many people may not know that you were once pregnant, but you would always know and every time that you had a period you would feel a small tinge of guilt.

You finished things in the bathroom and then took a seat on the side of your bed and stared at your phone for a moment, before picking it up and calling the last person who you wanted to discuss your marriage with.

“You have some nerve calling me this late in the day missy!” Your mom almost immediately answered.

“Hello to you to mom, oh I’m fine by the way, thanks for asking!” you said back.

“What the hell happened to you? Did someone piss in your cheerios today?” she asked back, “Why the hell am I hearing that you and Hoseok decided to end things?” she paused for half a second before she continued, not allowing you to answer the question. “Get your ass over here! You have some explaining to do!” she barked out before she hung up the phone.

You sat there in complete silence like a statue for a few seconds before you unfroze. You heard the chime of a new text message alert, and you looked down at your phone to see what it was.

Mom: Don’t you dare think about disappearing! If you don’t come today, then there will be some restructuring of this family!

Your eyes widened for a moment as you processed what your mother had sent to. You knew that she was going to be disappointed that you had ended the contract with Hoseok, but you didn’t think that it was going to become so serious! You got up from your bed and quickly put on some clothes before you headed off to your parents’ home.

As you parked your car you looked up to your family home and let out a quick deep breath. Today was going to fucking suck! As you got out of your car and started your walk to the front door you looked up to see your mother standing in the doorway with her arms crossed over her chest and a look of disapproval on her face. As soon as she was sure that you had seen her, she walked away from the door into the house leaving you by yourself outside. You completed the few steps with a scoff and a final sigh before you shut and locked the door behind you.

When you entered the house, you followed the smell of cigars and coffee to the living room where your father was smoking and reading the news paper and your mother was sitting, sipping on her coffee like a prima donna. Sensing your presence, your father looked up from his paper and quickly took hold of his cigar.

“There’s my little puppy! What are you doing here darling!” he exclaimed, obviously unaware of what was going on.

You cut your glance over to your mother before you smiled softly at him and took a seat in a chair across from her. If things weren’t already terrible now you would have to cut the news to him too, which you’re assuming that your mother was going to allow you to do as a form of punishment. “Mom called me over!” you finally answered.

“Good! It’s been a while since I’d seen you last kiddo!” he said with a chuckle.

You stared at him for a moment, taking in his happy image. You knew that his mood was going to do a whole 180 after he was finally in the loop, and your ass was going to be on the line. You looked down at your feet for a second and took a deep breath before you aired it all out.

“Dad there’s something that i-“…. You started softly but before you had time to say anything else you were interrupted.

“Hey! I didn’t know you were here! Want any coffee?” Hoseok chimed out in a positive tone as he entered the room with a coffee pot to fill your father and mothers’ cups.

You looked up at him in complete confusion and immediately began to feel yourself tighten up and close off. You looked over to your mother who was looking over at him sweetly with her cup stretch outward for a refill, and you immediately were filled with a silent rage. You were already going through enough of a tough time as is and the last person who you expected to exploit your emotions right now was your mother. But if she was going to do this to you and play around with threats then you were going to go straight to the source and make sure that she couldn’t do it again.

“Dad, there’s something that I need to talk to you about and I would prefer it if we could do that in private.” You said to him with a serious tone hoping that he could feel your sense of urgency.

Your father pursed his eyebrows together but then as soon as he had, he released them and gave you a soft smile back in return with a slight nod. As soon as he began folding his paper you stood up from your chair, ready to follow him to his study. But just as quickly as you stood up your mother had already began making her move.

“Darling none of that right now, you just got here!” Your mother trying to complain.

“If she has something that she needs to discuss with me then let her do it. She’s a busy girl!” Your father chimed in, standing from his seat.

The two of you were about to turn to leave the room when you suddenly felt a hand grabbing your wrist, restricting any further movement forward. You looked down at the hand that held onto you and followed it back to Hoseok, who had a particular look of urgency in his eyes.

“Actually, if you don’t mind… can I have a word with you first?” he asked softly.

You gave him a blank stare for a moment before you nodded your head. You looked over to your father who had already sat back down in his chair and waved his hand at you to go on. You looked back at Hoseok and pulled your hand away from his grasp, and he let go reluctantly.

You guided Hoseok to your father’s office where you knew that your conversation would remain private from any lurking eyes and ears. You locked the door behind the two of you as he entered behind you, and you gestured to the chairs that your father had arranged for meetings. You took a seat and the two of you sat in silence for a while and stared at each other’s faces.

Hoseok looked as good as ever and possibly even better, which pissed you off. Some days you could just manage to get out of bed, and yet here he was looking handsome after a night binge drinking while you were sober and feeling like a freight train had hit you.

“Why didn’t you unblock me?” Hoseok asked first thing.

You looked up to him surprised that he had remembered that much of last night. “To be honest I didn’t think that you would even remember showing up last night.”

Hoseok gave you a soft smile, but you could tell that there was nothing but a slight sting of pain behind it. “That’s fair. But if you know me at all you know that I’m a man of my word.” He said with a cheesier grin, “And… I know that you’re a woman of your word, so unblock me” he challenged.

You gave him an emotionless stare for a second before you pulled out your phone and unblocked his contact in your settings. You locked your phone and sat it down in your lap and looked up at him with a look of tiredness. “Are we done now?” you asked.

“Well….” He started to say but before he could get anything else out, he cleared his throat and looked around the room for a moment. You watched him in anticipation, which only seemed to make him more nervous. “I wanted to tell you a few things. And I know that right here, right now, is probably not the place where you want to hear them, but it’s the only way that I could get to you.”

“Well now you’re unblocked, so can we please do this another time?!” you pleaded with him

“No!” he said quickly, causing you to look up at him in shock. “I need to get this off of my chest before you go out there and tell your father that we’re done!” he said without being able to look you in the eyes.

Hoseok stood up from his chair and walked over to your father’s desk, letting his back face you. “I don’t want you to think that I don’t trust you anymore.” He said just louder than a sigh, “and I don’t want you to think that I don’t like you because of the pregnancy.” Hoseok finally turned around to face you from the desk and you could see that there was a single tear ready to spill out of his eye. “And I understand why…” he said with a broken voice.

You clenched your teeth and your fist into a tight ball as you worried about spilling tears of your own. You could see how this had affected Hoseok and it hurt to know that what you had done had caused him pain, but there was also a sense of relief that he had felt that pain. That you weren’t alone in your own thoughts and feelings. You closed your eyes and a shudder racked through your chest as you tried your best to keep yourself together.

Hoseok quickly cleared the office with a few steps and sat down on his feet in front of you holding your fists to his face as he cried. Slowly, you relaxed your hands and held his face, wiping away his stray tears with your thumbs.

“what’s done is done” you said in a soft whisper.

Hoseok gathered his breath, and he looked up at you. “I know, and I’m sorry that I tried to make the decision about my own wants… I only though of my own happiness before I even considered that this was something that could hurt you.”

You ran a hand over his hair and placed it back to his cheek trying your best to comfort him. “I know, and I’m sorry that I hid it from you.” You admitted “I should have been honest with you, but I was scared and nervous.”

Hoseok tilted his head further into your palm and shut his eyes. “Please…. Please don’t let this ruin everything that we had.” He prayed silently in your hand as you looked down on him.

“Hoseok…” you started and let out a small sob of your own. “I don’t know that it can go back to how it was after this.” You admitted “what happened is still so raw for me.”

“I know, I know.” He repeated and nodded his head “I’m sorry!” he sat up on his knees and reached out for your face to place soft kisses on your cheeks, nose, chin, forehead and eventually your lips. “I just want to be there to help pick up the pieces.” He said looking into your eyes.

You considered it… all of it. The happy moments, the moments of concern, the nights spent together and apart. The tears and the anger. And how the two of you had left each other so easily.

“I want that too…” you admitted “but I’m scared that this will always be there to haunt us.”

Hoseok pulled you down from the chair into his lap and he held you close to his chest. “I will never ever use this to harm you, start arguments, or belittle your character.” He said strongly “y/n, what I want the most is to be able to call you a partner again. And I know that right now you just need some time and space to heal, but I want to continue the contract…with you.”

You pulled back from him after your breathing and tears had settled and you looked up at him, holding onto his broad shoulders. “Are you sure?” you asked him.

He scoffed and gently tucked loose strands of your hair away from your face. “I never wanted to end it in the first place.” He said with a sad chuckle, causing you to look at him confused. “You were the one who had said that we should end things.” He smiled.

You looked down at his chest while you recalled what you had said … “Since we have come to such an outstanding disagreement then I think it’s best that we end our contract here. There’s no point of continuing if we can’t agree on such important principles or trust each other from here on out.”

“You had immediately pulled out the contract and signed it as completed, so what could I do?!” he stated. “You had already made up your mind, before I could even try to work things out.”

You nodded your head, taking ownership of how rash you had come to the decision without letting him discuss his own feelings or pain and how the pregnancy would have altered the relationship between the two of you. You had been the sole provider of your pain instead of talking things out.

“I’m sorry.” you said clearing your throat and wiping away any tear stains on your face. “I don’t really want to end things either, and things have been though lately without you there.” You admitted to him. “But I think before we jump headfirst in again, we should maybe take things slow, while we get everything figured out.”

Hoseok smiled at you and pulled you in once again, embracing you in a full body hug. You were shocked for a single moment before you allowed yourself to find comfort in his embrace again. You smiled to yourself and let out a deep breath, letting the dust settle over the animosity between the two of you.

“I’m okay with slow” Hoseok whispered to you, as he held you close.

[vanilladaises-rp]

“Im a bit busy right now bub, just give me a few more minutes”

“Do you like my new top baby?”

“Let’s go for a swim” ;)

“Purple is much better, more powerful”

“Let’s cuddle! Please please please please!”

“I’m learning a new dance for this week’s upcoming ball, want to join me?”

“See! I told you this would be more fun than class”

“My love you can’t just walk in on me like this”

“Yellow is nice but pink is definitely my color”

tags: @wiickedxgood @bunnybubkook @idontlikelizards @hugs4chan @minmin-petalcb @honey-beaut @lowblot @yourflower-cb @badbf-cb @luxora @jayswritingcafe @fairych4ein @halloween-idols @urbtsboys @payu-cb @nana-n-nono @universe-of-superm @angelxdevil-bot @moonlightchn @monsterhigh-cb @domxbot @lunaaofthemoon @clubwnderland @dia-oc @dr-hwa-cb @livealittleoc-cb @clubwnderland @writingstuffandmore @welcome-to-maniac

[monstaxmafiaau]

Thank you to everyone who got me to 5000 likes!

This pretty cool, not going to lie! Thanks everyone! I’m rereading old posts and figuring out what needs to be edited or rewritten lately.

[adonis-koo]

sweet nothing • 9

| in which he patiently waits one day at a time|

↳ Description: being a guest at the Jeon Estate after a mishap of being kidnapped and dragged into your brothers affairs isn’t all that bad. Truth be told it brings you a lot closer to the mobster and owner of the estate Jeon Jungkook himself.

His two rules are simple, don’t cause trouble and don’t give him a hard time. Somehow you manage to constantly do both in the most endearing way despite being pregnant and waddling around most of the time.

Pairing: Jungkook/reader, ???/reader

↳ Genre: slice of life AU, mafia!AU, pregnancy, there’s like…a little bit of a plot but not a lot, future smut? maybe? it's very domestic!

Word count: 2.9k

Previous | Next

Note: no matter how many scenes i write, they're all sad and i'm kinda sorry bc i said this fic wasn't going to have much plot but it somehow has a lot of plot now??? and its kinda sad??? HERE YOU GUYS GO THO

The commotion going on in the estate wasn’t difficult to tell, men had been actively walking more than their usual rotations required and Jungkook knew this was a sign you were causing some sort of chaos as you seemed to do every day now. 

And upon following the trail it led him just a door down from your own room, items being moved and you were currently pouting as you sighed. 

“Do tell me what your idea is for this little renovation project.” Jungkook hummed, leaning against the door, not actually annoyed at how much you always move things around in his estate in fact…Dare he say he felt a little endeared. 

And Jungkook found himself falling into old habits, habit he found himself missing, such as being able to take the time to admire you, all thoughts of work fading from his head at the sight of your dress, just past your knees and a faded checker blue, flowing sleeves that went to your elbows for room and of course the ever growing bump. 

Your hands were set around it seemingly pouting over something before his words drew you out of your thoughts, “Jungkook, I didn’t realize you were home so early.” 

“I have a meeting I have to attend in person later,” Jungkook replied, “You didn’t answer my question.” 

There it was again, that small pout he hadn’t realized he missed so much until it dawned your lips once more, “Well…” You seemed a bit hesitant before you spoke, “I gave it some thought- what we talked about a few days ago, about a nursery and I figured you were right. It’s better we be prepared for it then not.” 

Jungkook was relieved to hear this because while he was trying his hardest to get something on Wonho, there was a smaller, more selfish part of him that enjoyed this, enjoying having you at his estate.

An even smaller part of him not wanting it to end so soon, he had to let go of you once and no it wasn’t fair, but even there was even the slightest chance…well, he didn’t want to let it slip through his fingers and have to let you go once again. 

Jungkook only nodded, “So what's with the look then?” 

“Well,” You gave him a sheepish smile, “I had all of this stuff moved out and realized I have nothing to actually put in here…” 

Jungkook couldn’t help the chuckle that escaped him as he pushed off the frame stepping into the room, “Hm, that’s a strange way to ask for money.”

“Jungkook I wasn’t-”

“I’m teasing relax,” Jungkook cut you off, your lips tugging even poutier, you had always been like this, since day one in fact, always worried he’d think you were using him for money, always trying to deter him from paying even if you didn’t have the means to actually afford it yourself. 

It was sweet, “But you’re also in no position to not accept it and I have more than enough money to afford it- it’s a win win.” 

You stared at his outstretched hand, black shiny amex in his hand, “I don’t feel right just using it.” 

Jungkook sighed wistfully, “You didn’t seem to feel too guilty helping your brother with rates and statistics for drug sales.” 

Your lips parted somewhat in surprise, “That was different…!” 

“You’re right,” There it was that stupid teasing, charming smile of his, “It was probably worse.” 

You knew he was only teasing, but something about it made you feel gross still, you had a reason you were in that room, a reason that is long gone from you now, “Well it doesn’t matter anymore does it?” 

Jungkook paused at the sight of your expression dimming as you continued looking out the open window as your hand absently rubbed your bump, “I haven’t done that for a long time now…”

“Y/n I didn’t mean-”

“I know,” You cut him off softly looking back at him and there was an unmistakable look of regret in his eyes, not wanting to cross any lines with you but you were afraid they already had, “I just…I guess I just have some regrets about getting involved….I never wanted to hurt anyone,” You whispered out, “I had a reason I was there and it had nothing to do with the money...For myself at least.” 

Jungkook frowned, there were still so many things he didn’t know about you, your time together having been cut short when you both had first met, “What other reason could there be?” 

It was an indirect question, rather than a rhetorical one, you knew what he was asking. 

You hesitated, but then again, you supposed it didn’t matter now, it was all in the past, no matter how dull it made your heart ache. 

“Well…” You let out a soft sigh, “I’m sure you remember I wasn’t exactly financially stable, and for me that was fine. It was enough,” You nodded to yourself in thought, “It wasn’t much, but it was enough.”

“Until…?” 

“I received a phone call,” You mumbled, recalling the event, “A foster agency, telling me that they did a DNA test on one of their cases and it came out as a match on me and my brother. Just a week old, dropped off right outside the police station.” 

You had to bite down on your tongue, you had thought you were over it, but it still stung just as raw, “Since we were her only blood family I was given the opportunity to adopt her…” You let out a sigh trying to keep it together, “Except I was too poor, I didn’t even come close to having a qualifying salary to show that I could be responsible for her and take care of her…”

“What about Wonho?” Jungkook cocked his head to the side, baffled at this information. 

You let out a loud scoff, bitterness that you had tried so hard to let go of coming back up as you shook your head, “Wonho didn’t give a shit, told me that it wasn’t our problem but I struck a deal with him, if I helped him up until his annual evaluation with you for his first year of work, he’d help me get the expenses that were required to foster her.” 

Jungkook’s brows furrowed as he shook his head, “And?” 

There it was, that little niggle in your head that was angry about it all, angry at Wonho, angry at yourself, especially at Jungkook, “Well all of it fell apart. Very quickly, one thing after the other. I mean obviously you dropped off the face of the planet for months so Wonho wasn’t making money- I got let go of my job because of the murder- everything went void.” 

Jungkook looked away with a long inhale as if he had been mentally prepared for the moment you’d finally cave and say it, but it wasn’t as if you were wrong, you were simply stating a fact, he completely ghosted you and civilization as everyone knew it and just like that, he had left your life as quick as he entered. 

It was difficult to not be angry about it when he was the one that convinced you that the very thing you were afraid of wouldn’t happen, just for a few short months later, let it happen. And you were sure he had his reasons, you were certain of it, but it didn’t change the fact that he left you with little to no explanation and just like that, never bothered to come back, didn’t even so much as send a letter, a proper apology, nothing. 

“I’ve…” Jungkook’s eyes squinted on the ground, “I’ve been meaning to talk to you, about what happened.” 

You shook your head, “Jungkook, it’s been two years,” Your voice softened, his eyes glancing up to meet yours and once again you felt the dull ache that never went away, “I shouldn’t of brought it up, I’m sorry…it’s in the past now, life went on.” 

“Well it didn’t for me.” Jungkook let out a small breath and you could hear a hint of bitterness in his voice. 

Your lips quivered a little, “Do you have any right to say that?” 

“Probably not,” When did he get this close to you, “But it doesn’t change how I feel.” 

Old feelings were like a dam bursting inside you and you began to shake your head, “I’m not ready to talk about this Jungkook- can’t we just keep pretending like nothing happened?”

Jungkook shook his head, “We’ve both tried this and neither of us are good at it Y/n, I can’t, not when I have a second chance.”

You raised your brows, “No! No this is…” You took an immediate step back, “This is not what this is Jungkook, what happened is over. I’m only staying here because Wonho has a target on his back and you were kind enough to keep me out of the crossfire.” 

“Maybe that’s how it started out,” Jungkook replied just as quick, taking another step closer to you, “Look…I know it’s not fair,” He frowned, as if he hated saying it, “I had every intention to stay out of your life, it wasn’t fair to drag you along back then and that’s why I didn’t, but…You’re here now, right in front of me. So yes…I do see it as a second chance, and if there’s any way I can make it right, I will.” 

You groaned, “It’s not just making it right anymore!” You wanted to scream! “I have baggage now Jungkook!” Your eyes threatened to water as your hands dropped from your stomach, “A lot of it. It’s not just me anymore I’m getting ready to have a baby, you don’t know what you’re asking for.”

“I know exactly what I’m asking for.” Jungkook sharply replied, eyes brewing with anger, “And what I’m asking for is you, all of you.”

“You had your chance and you left me, plain and simple, you left. I don’t understand why now…Out of all the time, two years later, now…!?” You hadn’t meant to raise your voice, but you were angry, perplexed, scared. 

Scared just the way you were when he was upfront the first time in that stupid bakery you wanted nothing more then to pretend like didn’t happen, you wanted to pretend like you never got drunk at that stupid bar, that he wasn’t late that day, that he didn’t sat down and offer to pay for your meal for making you wait. 

You wanted to pretend like he had actually listened for once when you declined him asking you out, that he didn’t visit you every morning at work, and more then anything you wanted to pretend like you had a stronger will, that you didn’t let him convince, your mind was flooding with so many memories of him. 

His hand trailing down your thigh while drunk in the back of his car, his eyes when he saw the bust in your lip, his smile when your fingers intertwined with his, his skin etched into yours for the first time, ushered sweet nothings that he’d love you forever. 

But at the time you didn’t realize that forever would only be a short three months then just like that, it was over, and oftentimes you were left many sleepless nights wondering, was it even love? Everything had happened so fast, it felt like forever. 

But two years later, standing in front of him you realized it had been two agonizingly long years since you saw him in person. 

“I made a choice,” Jungkook defended himself, “I stuck to that choice…I was leaving you alone, even if I didn’t want to and then…” He ran a hand through his hair, revealing his face in full detail his eyes baffled as if trying to understand himself, “Suddenly one night you’re dropped in the middle of my office. I didn’t have any pretenses, I was just being nice letting you stay here, I had fond memories of our time together, I didn’t want to let you get caught in the crossfire- it was the least I could do after everything.” 

You crossed your arms as he continued, “And then…I don’t know,” He muttered, “I look at you, I see your smile, I see you standing here pouting and trying to do it all yourself, like you always tried to do. And suddenly it’s two years ago and we’re both drunk sitting at the bar talking about what it would be like to be in love. And I feel the exact same way I did back then, looking at you and wondering if maybe I had finally found it.” 

You felt physically sick, it was like he was intentionally wanting to break your heart all over again, “You sent them to raid my home, you can’t tell me this wasn’t planned…”

“I didn’t expect them to fuckin’ kidnap you Y/n!” Jungkook let out a hurt laugh, running his hand through his hair, “In fact I gave them direct instruction to do the shakedown while you were at work and to not destroy your apartment- you were supposed to be at work!” 

“Well I wasn’t!” You shouted back, “I wasn’t feeling well and my coworker offered to cover! You can’t do this to me! You can’t, not after all this time…” You voice died down, “You can’t just…open all of this back up as a second chance because you’re feeling nostalgic over a fling-”

“You were never a fling to me-”

“That’s how I felt after you left-” You suddenly winced, hand immediately pressing to your stomach, instinctual almost despite the pain coming from your chest, Jungkook’s eyes immediately widening and he had closed the small gap between you both. 

“Let’s get you sat down…” Jungkook murmured and you couldn’t help but stare at his hand, big and calloused, multiple rings just the way you remembered, pressed against your bump and a wave of intense sadness thrummed in your heart, what you’d give to go back and change everything. 

You were too tired to fight his touch, and a smaller part of you crying– begging inside your mind to just give in, to put your worries aside and roll the dice again, maybe he’d actually keep his promise this time. 

But you refrained from leaning against him too much as he sat you down on the bed in your room, phone immediately in hand as he called Doctor Choi, after hanging up the air was thick with a silence and tension. 

Jungkook sighed as he sat on the edge of the bed, “...If you don’t wanna talk about it, we won’t. I don’t want you going into preterm…But…I want you to know I didn’t make that decision because I wanted to, and I didn’t do it easily either.”

You self soothed, rubbing your tummy as your eyes closed, “I know you didn’t. At least that's what I told myself the last few years, that surely there was a really good reason…And you wanna know the worst part Jungkook?” You whispered, sad eyes as you opened them to look at him, “I waited…I waited every day, sat at that stupid register hoping you’d come, even after Wonho stopped talking to me I went to the Red Light anyways, hoped maybe you’d be there. There wasn’t a day I didn’t check my phone only to be disappointed by your name not being on the screen…”

It was silent again before you tried to hold back your tears, “You broke my heart. Right in two, promised you wouldn’t leave me, and then you did. And now you’re asking me for another chance?” 

You said you wouldn’t cry, but here you were softly weeping in your bed, feeling like a child once again, helpless and wondering why no matter how hard you tried, nobody ever stayed, you had thought he was different, but it turned out he was just like the rest. 

Jungkook’s hands cupped your cheeks, thumbing the tears away as he pressed his forehead down to yours, “For what it’s worth, I am sorry,” He murmured, “I’m just as much a sinner as anyone else, I’m ill-tempered and cruel, I’ve killed a lot more people then you could ever imagine, but most of all Y/n, I’m selfish, I’m not really a good man. But I could be good, for you.” 

“You don’t know how bad I really want to believe you,” You whispered out, “But I had so long to think about it, to look back and realize I know nothing about you. It was my own fault really, you’re not a good man and I knew that back then, just like I know it right now.”

“I know I hurt you,” Jungkook had a sort of determination in his eye, the kind that you knew was unwavering, he meant every word he was saying, “But there hasn’t been a day I wished it could be different. I’ll do whatever is necessary to earn your trust again.”

You pressed your lips together for a long moment, “I’m not saying it isn’t possible, but you have a long way to go if you really want it.” 

Jungkook’s long slim finger traced down your jawline, “I’ll take it one day at a time, just like the first time.” 

[kpop---scenarios]

Monster (5)

Pairing: Chan x Reader x Felix

Genre: Mafia, Arranged Marriage

Warning: some violence

Word Count: 1.6k

Taglist: @bluebeard67 @stephanieeeyang @stayatinykatsy @thicccurls @thecutiepieme @maisyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy @kayleefriedchicken @msauthor @purple-bell @bluesiebirdie @jisunglyricist @skzdust @hash2013 @skzooluvr

@gloriajovicc @jiminssluttyminx @mouseyboo @gloriajovicc

One | Two | Three | Four

“So I guess you'll be getting ready for your date?” You ask Chan, leaning against the frame of his bedroom door.

“I truly do not want to go, Y/N.” He sighs. You knew he didn't and you were grateful for that. Because you had noticed today that there was something different about Felix since he went out with Mia last night. He didn't look at you the same as he had done, and it was almost like he was actively avoiding you. Part of you worried that he had found out about what you and Chan had done while he was gone. And while you felt guilty, it had felt right and you didn't regret what you did. You really liked Chan, you liked Felix too but part of you felt more for Chan.

Before you can say anything to him, your ozone rings. You groan loudly looking at the caller, it was your dad.

“Hi dad.” You sigh, answering the phone.

“Can you and the boys come to the house please? And bring Mr. Lee. There's an announcement.” He explains before hanging up the phone.

“That was weird.” You murmur, sliding your phone into your back pocket.

“What happened?” Chan asks, finishing putting on his shirt.

“My dad wants you, me, Felix and Mr. Lee, to go to the house. He said there's an announcement.” You explain, shrugging your shoulders. “I wonder if Mia made a choice.”

“I haven't even gone out with her yet, but I guess it's possible. If I don't have to go then that would be wonderful.” He laughs.

A few minutes later, you're all in the car, heading to your fathers house. The car is quiet, except for the almost whispering murmur of the radio. Mr. Lee is driving, Chan in the front with you and Felix sitting in the back seat. He has his arms crossed, his head leaning back on the headrest with his eyes closed. You want to ask him if he's okay but he doesn't seem very interested in talking to you at this moment.

When you pulled up to your fathers house, you headed for the front door first, greeting Wonho and Shownu who stood there like usual, giving you a slight nod as you all walked into the house.

“Dad?” You call out, waiting to hear where his voice comes from.

“Living room, Y/N.” He calls back. The four of you head over there, seeing him sitting on the couch with a grinning Mia beside him. This wasn't going to be good.

“What's going on?” You ask, looking between the two, as you all sit on the opposite couch.

“Mia has an announcement.” Your father begins. “She's made a decision.”

“That one.” She smiles, pointing to Felix. “The one with the voice. He seems promising.” She says.

“You're going to marry him and you don't even know his fucking name? Sounds solid.” You scoff.

“Y/N.” Your father warns. “Don't start.”

“Honestly dad, she's going to marry him and she can't even remember his name. It's embarrassing.” You say.

“Stop trying to defend me, Y/N. I'll marry her, so you can stop pretending to care.” He snaps, moving to sit next to Mia, who squeals, grabbing onto his bicep.

“My future husband.” She giggles.

You're so thrown off. What the fuck did you do for him to be so upset with you?

“What are you talking about?” You ask, watching him avoid any eye contact with you.

“Like you don't know.” He scoffs.

“Enough.” Your father yells. “The wedding will take place two weeks from Saturday.”

Your jaw drops. “That's soon..” you mutter, glancing at Chan, whose jaw has tensed at the news.

“Well we're all excited for this marriage and merger, Y/N.” Mr. Lee says, smiling to your father.

“Would you like to stay for dinner?” Your father asks Felix and Mr. Lee. they both nod their heads before your father glances at you.

“You're welcome to stay with Chan, if you want.” He says to you.

“We'll pass, but thanks.” You say, grabbing Chan's hand to drag him out of the house.

“What the fuck.” Chan says, sliding into the driver's seat. “What changed between last night and this afternoon that Felix is just willingly marrying her?”

“She must have said something to him. Did you see how he was treating me? There's no way she didn't say something fucked up about me.” You sigh.

“Yeah I did.” Chan says, pulling out of the driveway. “Looks like we've got two weeks to figure out what the fuck is going on.”

**

The next day, you managed to catch Felix alone, as he was on his way out of the house. “What do you want, Y/N? I'm meeting Mia.”

“What did I do?” You ask. There was no time to beat around the bush now. “Why are you so mad at me?”

“Stop acting stupid, Y/N. You and I both know you begged Mia to pick me so you could have Chan to yourself. What was it that you said..” he pauses. “Oh right, that you needed a real man, not someone who looks like me, right?” He snaps.

“What the fuck?” You yell. “Felix, I never said that. I would never say that. I thought you would have known me by now.” You respond, trying to reel in the hatred for your sister, currently. You weren't trying to get mad at Felix, but you were so frustrated, especially at the fact that Felix thought you could possibly say that about him.

“Yeah, she told me you would deny it.” He laughs, but it's completely void of humor. “Don't worry, Y/N, you've got your wish. I'm out of your way now. So I hope you're really happy with Chan.”

“Felix, are you serious? Why would I say that?” You ask. You had no reason to, you honestly had been extremely attracted to Felix.

“I don't know.” He whispers.

“It's Mia.. I don't know what the fuck she's planning here, but there's something. I wouldn't say that. And I know you know it.” You argue.

“I honestly don't know what to believe.” Felix sighs. “I have to go, I have a wedding to plan.” He finishes, walking out of the house and away from you.

There was a bigger game at play here, one that your father and Mia were playing, and you were determined to find out what exactly that was.

“Y/N!” Chan yells. “I've got something.” He says, rushing towards you with some papers.

“What's that?” You ask, trying to push your conversation with Felix out of your head.

“The guy who attacked you in your apartment. His name is Kim Jongin, he's part of a lower level gang called EXO. They haven't been active much since quite a few members ended up inside. He recently got out. Do you know who Kim Jisoo is?” Chan asks you.

“Yeah, that was Seojoon's work partner.” You answer. “Why?”

“That was Jongin's arresting officer.” Chan responded.

“That.. no that can't be.” You say. Was Seojoon actually a cop then? “I thought you guys were fucking around when you kept saying he was a cop.”

“I mean we mostly were.. but a lot of the time we can tell.” Chan tells you. He gently rubs your arm as you try to make sense of this. First the picture of Seojoon with your father, now you find out he's actually a cop. So is that why your father was meeting with him?

“We need to talk to Jongin.” Chan says.

“I need you talk to Seojoon.” You snap. That motherfucker.

“You will. But first, Jongin.” Chan half smiles. You reluctantly agree, following him to the garage. You say nothing to Chan as he drives to the address he had listed for Jongin. Your mind is racing with the shit going on with your father, Seojoon, Mia and Felix. As bad as everything was, the Felix thing was bothering you the most. You couldn't wrap your head around the fact that he would believe Mia over you. She didn't know him and already she's brainwashed him.

“Y/N.” Chan says, breaking you from your thoughts. “We're here.” He finishes, putting the car in park and turning it off. He reaches over to his glove box to open it, pulling out a handgun. He checks to make sure it's loaded before he gets out of the car, tucking it behind him in the waist of his jeans. You get out of the car, following behind him. Stopping in his tracks, he turns around to face you. “Whatever you do, stay behind me.” He says, planting a quick kiss on your lips before continuing to walk up to the house that looked like it was hanging on by a thread.

Chan doesn't bother knocking on the door, instead, jiggles the door knob, popping the door open. He pulls his gun out, pointing it in front of him as he moves through the house, you holding onto the back of his shirt to stay as close to him as possible. The house is silent, eerily silent as the two of you move through trash and discarded bottles, looking for any sign of life.

Suddenly something jumps out at Chan, tackling him to the ground as you scream as loudly as you could. You watch in horror as the man throws a few punches, one landing on Chan's face, until he manages to push the man off of him. He scrambles up, pushing the man back before climbing on top of him, getting in a few blows of his own.

Seconds later the man surrenders, breathing heavily as Chan holds him down. “Y/N!” Chan yells. “This is him?”

“Y-yeah. That's him.” You whisper.

“The fuck you want with her?” Chan screams.

“I was paid!” Jongin yells. “I was paid to say some shit, I was paid to scare her.”

“By who?” Chan asks.

“Park Seojoon!” Jongin yells. “But I wasn't the only one he paid, so watch out.

[hollyhomburg]

Before I Leave You (Pt.52)

(Omegaverse au, Mafia au, Bts x Reader)

Summary: Jimin and Jungkook might not be the /best/ at giving you aftercare, but what they lack in execution they make up for in sheer determination. Sometimes, love is the best medicine.

Tags: Sub drop, Angst, Self-deprecating thoughts, Self-esteem issues, Hurt, comfort, Tears, sex scene Negotiations, vibrators, voyeurism, pleasure-dom jimin, pillow princess m/c, discussions of past sexual and physical abuse (nothing that i don’t believe hasn’t been touched on prior), mentions of death, medical stuff, 

W/c: 8.6k

A/n: Ah, this is a chapter, am i the most proud of it? no. but thats okay! i hope people will like the hurt/comfort! i think i needed to write something like this for bily. i know bily is long but! this is probably one of the most intimate chapters i’ve written so i like it for that fact, and all the subtext in it! 

Previous Chapter - Masterlist

Yoongi’s not waiting in the house for you when you get back from the gym. He’s not even waiting on the porch. No- he’s on the street, eyes frantic and flannel misbuttoned like he’s been listening for the grumble screech of Jimin’s car. Like he started walking down the street the second he heard it.

He hardly even wants to wait for it to thud to a halt. The smell of metal and gasoline gunks up your stuffy nose, keeping you from scenting him. His hands are so soft on you when he makes to pull you out of the car and Jungkook’s lap although the omega clings to you. A half-affronted noise leaves his throat. bereft as you’re transferred from one packmate to another.

But Jungkook would never deny Yoongi this.

Your mates’ hands shake, trembling when they cup the back of your neck. “Oh- my little sweetheart- I’ve got you- I’ve got you-”

Truer words have never been spoken. He effortlessly lifts you out of the car and into his arms. You’re little more than a puppet, a doll underneath your mates’ hands as you reach for him and are rewarded.

Your nose feels rubbed raw either from the scents of everyone at the gym or your own sobs that tear through your throat. The sound is as rough as sandpaper and as quiet as the pea gravel that clinks against their sneakers as they ferry you into the house. But the soothing smell of chocolate feels like pure relief when he tucks your face into his throat.

Jimin leaves his car parked cockeyed in favor of shooting out of it to usher you and Yoongi inside, hand on your back. Jungkook’s close behind. Big hand closing around the tips of your fingers.

There has never been a prettier safer house than your and Yoongi’s home. Finally- you can smell your packmates, and it’s that alone that starts your comedown. You finally feel a little bit safe. Here where evidence of the people who live and love you clings to the floorboards and the strawberry-patterned tea cloths. and push away dangerous ideas that hover on the edge of your consciousness like vultures. 

Here you go, making a big deal out of nothing again. Here you go making them love you less. You should accept your alphas criticism without all this fanfair- what kind of omega can’t handle such a simple correction? Geumjae would have hit you harder and you wouldn’t have been nearly as upset. You should punish yourself more to make up for it-

You barely remember the moments you spent leaving the gym; Memories strung together like mismatched socks on a close line.

A face you don’t know well enough to recognize yet- Wonho maybe. “I told you to make sure she didn’t hurt herself kook” “It’s not that kind of hurt hyung.”

Jimin’s barely leashed growl as he came too close. Too threatening and forghein to Jimin's grating senses. There is nothing more dangerous to an alpha than a strange not-packmate coming close to a distressed omega.

He was ready to flatten Wonho, But luckily he didn't have to. Hopefully the other omega won’t hold it against you later.

You remember Jungkook getting you into the back of the car. Wrapping his arms around your back when you curled up as tight as possible. You remember Jungkook telling Jimin to drive fast. His cheek laid over your shoulder, already trying to cuddle the sadness away.

You remember lurching into motion before Jimin could even touch the gas pedal. Frantic, shaking your head. Begging him not to. Shaking so hard you could hardly see.

He’d kept you at a reasonable speed even though his whole body was trembling too. Eyes more on the rearview mirror and you and Jungkook in the back seat than on the road. 

You’re still shaking. It doesn’t stop when Yoongi puts you into Jin and Jungkook’s nest. Jungkook immediately begins to fluff the covers. Pulling items closer to you that the other omega deems of particular comfort; Namjoon’s favorite pillow. Hobi’s sweatshirt. Jin’s favorite yellow blanket; the mustard yellow companion to your thick blue duvet that's in the other room. 

Even as Yoongi gets you situated, whipping away your tears with his sleeve and clutching you close. Like if he just keeps your head tucked below his chin then nothing bad can happen to you.

Jimin pulls back the covers so that you and Yoongi can get in and when you do-

The fluff of it is safe, blissfully so. 

A safe little cavern of warmth and softness and pack that your mate places you into. You’re still crying, still curled up as tight as you can. But the reverence with which they treat your curled form is almost enough for the bleak nameless awfulness to leak out and warmth to take its place. Jungkook tugs himself along your spine and Yoongi teeters, one knee in the nest. Jimin darts out the door, clearly having something else in mind.

Jungkook looks up at Yoongi. “She needs-“ 

“Chocolate,” your mate says. Every Dom is well acquainted with the tiny bundles of serotonin found in gold foil, as holy and easily given as communion. Subs always get chocolate after a scene. It's one of Yoongi's rules. It even applies to Jungkook. Even when it might trigger a seizure. The pack has learned that certain things are worth the compromise.

A drop is something that they’ve all felt at one point- Dom drop too although that predicament is substantially less common. But Jungkook has never witnessed anyone drop quite this bad. (You’re still crying so hard. Hard enough that there’s a knot building in Jungkook’s own chest). He's never been in the position to take charge and take care of them the way the others might. 

Now- he wants to do more than that. He wants to be the first one you turn to for comfort, the one in control of getting you back to normal. 

“And water-“ 

Jungkook’s fluffy hair flops as he shakes his head, “not water-“

“Lemonade?” Jungkook nods, pout disappearing as Yoongi is properly ordered about.  

The basket that Jimin carries is nearly as tall as his torso and twice as wide, packed several inches higher with mismatched blankets and soft things. Filled to the brim with every last nesting blanket that the pack keeps in the hallway closet. He places it on the edge of the bed softly so as to not startle you and then-

Promptly dumps it out on top of you.

Light filters down past cotton and soft down feathers, obscuring Jimin and the sound of his voice, muffled by the layers and layers of fabric. “I put the big one in the drier, it should be warm in a few minutes.” Jungkook behind you fidgets happily, the small murrr he lets out ascent and praise enough as he begins to fuss and build a nest around you. The walls higher, safer. 

Jungkook, Jimin, and Yoongi operate as a perfectly oiled machine. Yoongi goes to get you food and Jimin replaces him. As pitiful as you might be, as pathetic as you might look (sniffling, face all blotchy and hot feeling underneath their touch) You have never been in better hands as Jimin settles you.

An alpha, omega, and beta a piece- it’s almost as good as your whole pack.

Jungkook falls into a purring nesting fury as you sniffle. Fluffing the nesting things around you until you resemble some sort of cozy flower. Each of the blankets is a careful petal placed just so, keeping you safe and snug inside until you're ready to bloom.

Jimin shucks off his sweatshirt, his arms are warm and fuzzy underneath your nose as he holds himself close but not too close.

Alphas. You’re sensitive to them- are you not? Can your fractious brain recognize that Jimin’s not a threat? Worry gnaws at his wrists. Nests are meant to be the safest place for omega’s. While this one isn’t yours technically, still-

Jimin will understand if he’s not the person you want to comfort you through this.

You’ve never seen Jimin this timid as he sets one hand on your head, rubbing through, a comforting growl tugging from his chest- keeping a little bit of a distance between you in case you’re not ready for it and-

And you don’t want it. You don’t want a single inch between you.

You want him wrapped around you so tight that you can’t tell where your body begins and his ends. You want him to want to hold you like he needs you. You want him to hold you like you could never do anything wrong because you know how far from the truth that is.

Everytime this happens you wonder if this is the time they decide that you're too much to handle. If this is the meltdown that will estrange them from you.

What request could it be that might tip the scale out of your favor? What is too much love when compared to not enough? Don't both leave a sour taste in your mouth? Namjoon and Hobi last night is only part of it- they're only part of what you’re guilty of.

But Jimin, hovering over you, is the one person who might share your fate.

The sheer terror that the truth will poison the ones you love. the idea that everything you have is only one truth away from disappearing. He at least- can understand what this particular kind of regret and fear feels like.

But It’s okay. It’s okay because Jimin probably doesn’t want to hug you anyways. You don’t want affection if it’s forced. The best you can do is hope not to be a burden, Jimin is probably at the end of his rope with you- always trailing after him and Tae.

You quake beneath his sky touches; petting down your hair and cupping your wet cheek to wipe away the fresh wetness. Your lower lip trembling, face crumbling again. He's being painfully gentle, not hard and anchoring like you want him to be.

Jimin’s shaking with the effort of holding himself back. Jimin has always been able to subvert his needs for his packmates just like you. But his leash on himself is tightly pulled right now. 

Luckily Jungkook notices the reason for your shaking. A keen builds in your throat. Your omega reacting to Jimin’s presence without your say so. You're two seconds away from letting out an embarrassingly needy chirp when He pokes his head up out of the blanket, glaring at Jimin-

“Minnie- I swear to god if you don’t hug her right fucking now-“

No sooner has the order been given than Jimin is crushing you. All the hard and pretty edges of him cradling you into being. Your knees pressed to his knees, the rumble of his growl pressed to the top of your head and the feeling of him inhaling pressing to your chest. Strong arms around your shoulders. 

Jungkook pulls his body back along your back, your behind nestled in the cradle of his hips. Until you're completely covered by the both of them, any spare inch not cuddled and touched and loved is protected by the blankets too.

Your breath still isn’t coming right and you’re still crying so hard that your ears hurt. So hard that it feels like the skin of your face is hot underneath the tears, you know it must be the most unattractive thing in the universe. And yet-

And yet Jimin nuzzles into the side of your face. Fingers tickling your collarbones, “Breathe in for me.”  A simple command. You follow it, chest inhaling, pushing against Jimin’s palm. “Again.”

It’s easy to breathe because he wants you to. And only because Jimin wants it. You’re good aren’t you good.

“Good pup” You sag against him, and he soothes you with more of that, endless grumble growls of “good puppy, such a good omega for us, doing so well.” Falling from his lips.

“Jesus” Yoongi says when he comes into the room and finds the nest a mess, the pile of blankets arranged on top of the three of you. Nothing more than air holes and misplaced limbs that let him know the configuration of your bodies. It’s hard for him to muscle his way in, but he plucks a pillow from the side and is rewarded by Jungkook’s face and the top of your head ruffled from Jimin’s copious scent as he drags his cheek up and down.  Jungkook whines petulantly at being discovered.

“Alright, up. I know you want to smother her but she needs chocolate and shit.”

Yoongi would be worried, more insistent that he be wrapped around you too- but your scent is slowly mellowing. The tense tugging down his mating bond doesn’t feel quite so taught. (At least not like it did earlier when he was finishing the drawer knobs upstairs. Your dropping felt like someone dragging their nails down the nape of his neck. Like the drop in temperature before a storm or a plunge on a rollercoaster. The lurch when your feet misplace a step).

He’d known before Jungkook called.

Despite all the love you can’t seem to stop crying. At least it’s gentler now. Jimin kisses your wet cheeks. Your tears living and dying on his mouth as he kisses each one away diligently. And then the feeling of his warm tongue, darting out kittenish as he cleans your face free of the memory of sadness with soft small licks.

It’s a little wet and a little gross, but Jimin’s hair tickles your forehead, nose nudging yours as he works. It's not exactly grooming per say but close enough. The soothing rumble growl of his chest sends you down and down. Turning your sobs to sniffles.

“Open up sweetheart” Eyelashes fluttering, Your chin gets nudged up by Yoongi’s hands. His fingers gently pinch your cheeks and guide your mouth to fall open obediently. Yoongi places a small piece of chocolate on your tongue, the inch squares broken in half then half again. A big cup and straw with icy lemonade soothes your hot throat. Jimin’s soft licks continue when your mouth is occupied, licks that grow into hungry kisses when he finds a bit of chocolate on the corner of your mouth and licks there.

Jungkook looks as stern as you’ve ever seen him, holding the lemonade cup threateningly. “You’re going to stay right here, you’re going to let us love you until you don’t feel so shitty, and only then- will we let you out of the nest, okay? Pack's orders.”

Yoongi jostles Jimin and the alpha pulls himself a little more on top of you to give him an inch edgewise. Feilding complaints of “you know I get supreme cuddle priority where this is concerned.” He grumbles, but lets your mate manhandle you until you’re placed gently on top of his chest. (If this is what babying by three separate packmates is like- you can’t imagine what it would feel like from all seven.)

You try to duck back below of the edge of the covers but Jungkook doesn’t let you, making a soft noise and bending over to kiss at the corner of your mouth. “Why does Minnie get to lick all the chocolate-“

“Oh, be quiet kookie” Yoongi’s finger hooks into his mouth- shoving a bigger piece that he crunches on through his laughs.

Another square. Another sip. They don’t make you talk, but soon all you want is another kiss. Jimin’s lips work on your throat nudging pleasant pheromones from your scent gland and cleaning you of the grainy film of sadness. While Jungkook and Yoongi trade your mouth between the two of them. 

Jungkook’s tongue tastes like chocolate, just like Yoongi’s. It’s dizzying and slowly gets hotter as your bodies warm up the nest. Jimin's hands slide up your ribcage, holding you in place as he laps at your throat. Leaving your scent gland pink and sensitive and utterly normal smelling under his mouth.

Every chocolate square earns you another kiss until you’ve almost eaten the whole bar. “You’re going to make my lips chapped.” Jungkook hums through another kiss but recognizes that it’s a wet confession. You’re still sniffling.  

“Too bad. It's what you deserve.” He says matter of factly, swallowing your protest with another kiss. Yoongi makes a sound in agreement. do I though? Do I really? Isn’t this all just- not allowed? Not for me? Am I really worth all this. “I can hear you doubting us you know-” Jungkook pushes. 

Yoongi’s fingers massage down your tense neck and you tuck your face into his shoulder. Your mate sighs, and you thank god or whatever force above that Yoongi's never been one to challenge you the way that Jungkook does.

“Can we just go back to kissing if you’re going to psychoanalyze me?”

Jungkook doesn't let you hide, turning your cheeks up at him “You deserve every bit of this, and every bit of babying the others are going to give you when they come home-“ you gulp, but try and twist your face out of his hands.

"Kookie-" your mate eases.

But they won't just let you stew, content to kiss away your sadness. If that was ever a thing might happen their mouths could do it. Jungkook’s with his cute little mole. Jimin’s that are so plush you half expect each kiss to come with a squeaky toy noise. And your mate's kisses, slow and lingering working you over until your scent goes sweet and heavy.

 You hardly have enough time to breathe between one mouth and the next.

Your breathless "fuck" gets swallowed between Jungkook's huff and Jimin's insistent growl. he’s so grumbly when he kisses, each press of his lips earning another possessive rumble. Comforting kisses and hot kisses and every type of kiss in between. Unhurried in their intent of taking you apart and putting you back together.

You don't know how long they spend kissing you but it feels like hours.

The need between your thighs builds with every kiss. The hunger sensitivity hotness of arousal carefully cultivated by their mouths and nothing else. you’ve never been someone who had a particular weakness for kisses but maybe it’s just getting passed around that has you riled up so fast. the smell of buttery baked slick eventually nudges your nose. They’re so close, so hot pressed around you. You can feel Jungkook’s rapid heartbeat against your back.

Yoongi's hand massages closer and closer to the nape of your neck not a scruff, but not not a scruff either. Jimin is not content to wait while you kiss, Jungkook delicately licks into your mouth, almost lapping at the seam of your lips. it’s messy and primal and you feel yourself clench around nothing when he sucks on your lip. Just in time with Jimin dragging his lips up and down your scent gland, hot and clean under his touch. 

Sometimes- sometimes soft sex is the best sort of aftercare. Especially after the doms are particularly rough. From what Yoongi knows of your scene last night (Namjoon and Jin gave him a rundown) neither you nor Hobi got to cum last night.

Maybe that's what you need. Like this. So soft and gentle that you hardly have to lift a finger.

Jungkook settles for man-handling your lower half, tangling your legs, and nesting his between yours. Squirming close enough for the apex of your legs to touch his thigh. Dragging along the thickness. not exactly sexual given you're both clothed and yet-

Yoongi catches his hands. Sensing your discontent before you shift, not entirely uninterested but-

You have three packmates in front of you and you'd have a hard time even pleasing one of them right now with how tired you feel.

jimins hands start to linger along the hem of your shirt but you catch them and pull back, Fingers pressing gently, tentatively giving your bodies some space. Eyes darting away from him, unable to meet his eyes.

“I think- I’m still a little sore from-” from Tae’s knotting, almost four days ago now. Your body still hasn’t healed itself completely. The skin deep ache is still there when you move. Not to mention the tenderness on your backside from Namjoon. There's still evidence of her, barely there bruises from her mouth poking up over your hip where your shirt has gotten rucked up from Jungkook's fingers gentle and explorative.

Don’t make me say no to you right now. Please don’t make me disappoint you.  I don’t think I’d be able to say no right now if I wanted to. I don’t think I’m able to not to give you every inch of me. 

Your memory fractures, hurtling you into another moment, another lifetime.

In the backseat of a fancy car after a dinner during which you hadn’t been able to keep from crying. You couldn’t help it, it just hurt so bad sitting after the night before. You were so sore then- not sore just- in pain just sitting there.

It was one of the first nights he’d ever been overly rough with you. Rough enough that you’d found yourself too hurt for any more. But Geumjae hadn't wanted to hear it. You remember Geumjae cupping the back of your head just as gently, urging you down toward his crotch. The chauffeur in the front seat put up the partition.

“There is one way you can make it up to me. I know you’re upset that you made me angry. But you have to remember if I’m happy you’re happy right?” 

Right?

Jungkook and Yoongi take your answer for what it is. The kisses get slower, more pecks. But Jimin- Jimin is still eyeing you precariously. He notes the darkness in your eyes, the place you go to that's small and dark and scary.

"If you’re saying that because you think this has to involve a knot- then you’re wrong. It doesn’t. I was just going to-” he trails off, waiting and watching. You shift backing up right into Jungkook who promptly loops his arms around your middle.

“Doesn’t it?” You ask carefully. Still very unsure and very worried. “You can’t exactly like- fuck the sad out of me any other way. Can you?”

You don’t mean it to sound like a challenge but it’s clear something in Jimin takes it like that by the way he bristles. something in Jungkook too. His hands are still on you, still on your stomach. Stroking gentle circles that go hard with your words.

“Not at all."

"Do you think we have all those sex toys for decoration?"

You shrink, and Jungkook nuzzle sweetly. Yoongi cautions, unsure. "Guys-"

But Jimin is never one to back down. Pressuring you is the last thing he wants to do but he just wants to understand why. When he can so clearly smell that you're interested- why are you refusing?

There's something about seeing you so sad, so small and unsure like you just were that makes him itch.

He nudges the side of his face with his nose. “If you don’t want to cum then you don’t, that’s all I was implying. Nothing reciprocal- this isn’t about making us happy.”

Happy

You toy with the front of his shirt, something in your stomach lurching. You don't know if you can believe what Jimin says but- Jimin is honest. When you pull back to search his eyes there’s nothing there that betrays the truth. 

“I don’t want to just like- get off while you guys watch, that hardly seems fair- that hardly seems- right.”

Don’t let me take more from you- because I will take too much from you if you let me. I don’t want to feel selfish on top of feeling like I’m not enough. I should be offering the same to you for fucking up your afternoon.

Jimin darts forward, pressing his mouth to yours, in a brief hot way, speaking with his body when his words just won't align. When he pulls back he doesn't leave you entirely, keeping his forehead pressed to yours.

“Say no. Say no and we’ll drop it and I promise we’ll just cuddle but- do you trust me?”

“Yes” you answer, because you do- you think you might always trust Jimin. Despite what happened before you knew Yoongi and the whole pack. Despite everything that’s happened since. Jimin has always proven himself with his love, a selfless love.

He was the first one after Yoongi who bandaged your cuts and kissed your burns and bruises, all those months ago. Back when you had nothing to offer him, not even your words. You can trust the medicine he prescribes. There was nothing in it for him then, no reason that he had to care for you.

“You promise you won’t like- get angry if it's just me? If I don't want to reciprocate?” You tentatively trail off, you don't want to be too articulate with it but you have to know. 

Jimin’s eyes darken ever so slightly, but you don’t find any of that anger in his answer. None of it- directed at you. “Of course, I won’t. I’d never do that. None of us would ever get angry at you for that.”

You watch Jimin for one more moment, hiccuping and Sniffly. You duck jimin’s intense gaze shyly. "You don't have to," you say weakly, giving them one last chance to change their minds, interest stirring anew as Jungkook sucks down the column of your throat. Your scent spiking again- comforted and consenting.

"Just shut up and let us take care of you" Jungkook gets a nip for that one.

Yoongi leaves the nest at Jimin’s urging to choose something you might like from the boxes in the closet. “Oh! Get the pink one with the-” Jungkook orders. but Yoongi pauses in the doorway to look back and watch you. You’ve gone back to exchanging soft kisses. 

The Yoongi of many months ago would have intervened before Jimin could even ask the question before he could even press you. But now- something in him feels nearly settled while he watches you snuggled down between the two of them. 

In another world; where you and Jimin and Jungkook and Tae had met before Yoongi and the rest had. He thinks you'd have done well together. That you’d have fallen in love or into something- regardless of him. The idea of it is both comforting and scary. 

Yoongi comes back, and you barely catch the flash of pink as you recline against Jungkook’s chest. As Jimin slides your pants down your hips, pulling back the blanket so he can slide them off your feet.

The kisses keep coming, and you don’t know where to put your hands, they end up hovering in front of you awkwardly- unknowing if you should touch Jimin or if that would be too much.

Jimin holds his hand out expectantly for it, and Yoongi hands it over with a quiet huff. Alphas and their possessiveness. Trust Jimin to be possessive of your pleasure.

The head of the vibrator is already warm. Jimin is considerate that way and warms it up between the palms of his hands before he begins. Your mate keeps trading you for kisses, pressing the occasional peck to jungkook’s forehead or cheek. both of them keep you distracted, and prevent you from getting anxious as jimin intently bunches your panties to the side (the fabric damp enough that it wets jimin’s fingers). But Jimin is too focused to kiss you too, too insistent that he be the one to hold the vibrator.

You don't even have to lift a finger. Is this what he meant when he said he wanted to turn you into a pillow princess all those weeks ago?

It’s gentle, you’re too distracted with kissing them as Jimin presses it to your clit. He does it softly but even so, the gentle first touch of it buzzing against you has you jerking.

Yoongi lets out a soft noise, hands going to your hips as you squeak, keeping you still underneath the covers. Everything is warm and hidden and gentle. The only disturbance is your breathing getting heavier, and Jungkook asking Yoongi for a little bit of chocolate. 

It's so casual you would hardly assume from their behavior that there was anything lewd happening under the covers. Jimin starts on the lowest setting, slowly cranking it up as the minutes go on. Hooking your thigh to the side so that the folds of your pussy can better part around the head of it. Watching you intently, pulling it away to watch your clit twitch. 

Fuck, he thinks, tae wasn’t lying when she said you were cute. It’s been long enough from the time in Jimin’s car that he’d almost forgotten how wet you get and yet. The head of the vibrator glistens, and he licks his lips when he realizes the wet patch you’re leaving on Jungkook’s thigh. 

Jungkook watches you as he eats the chocolate, smiling down at you when your eyelashes flutter. He hopes it feels good, you feeling good is something he wants all the time. He keeps the chocolate on his tongue, letting it get melty and gooey before he kisses you again.

Jungkook doesn’t stop kissing you, working your mouth with his, letting the chocolate melt into the seam of your mouth keeping you occupied while Jimin takes you apart. Both of Yoongi's hands cup your hips, urging you into a gentle grind. He's doing all the work really, nudging your hips in the direction of Jimin’s hands. Holding you still when you start to twitch.

You're so worked up from your kisses, from the spanking last night where you never got to cum, and the fact that the last time you did was with Tae and Yoongi almost 5 days ago now- that it comes quicker than you thought it would.

Your orgasm is such a gentle thing, further urged on by Jungkook’s hot mouth running down the column of your throat and Yoongi’s pleased grumble. Quiet moans that become stilted as your toes curl, stretching. 

"There you go sweetheart, just like that-" Jimin growls, pressing the head of the vibrator to you with slightly more force. Making your tummy clench up under his hand where he presses. keeping you pinned exactly where he wants you.

Jimin keeps the vibrator pressed to your clit just long enough before you’re squirming away. Jungkook- the little fucker- actually has the audacity to laugh, looking down at the bottom of the nest, where it’s been disturbed by your moving.

“You know- I never noticed it before, but you kind of stretch your toes like noodle does- you know when he’s stretching in the sun, toes all splayed- when you cum.”

Your mate actually laughs at that, so does Jimin- his chest shaking under your cheek as you hide.  “It’s kind of stupidly cute.”

“Shut up” you hiss, but there's no heat behind it as Jimin detangles the vibrator from the nest and hands it over to your mate. Yoongi promptly shoves it into the bedside drawer, out of sight and out of mind.

Jimin sets your thigh back down easily, placing your your panties back in place with a soft tap that has you jerking again. Your soft whimper is soothed by him and Yoongi as your body goes boneless and your mind goes quiet. jungkook re-tucks the nest around you but you don't think you could move from it if you tried, every ounce of energy worn out of it from crying and cumming.

Coming down is so easy, it’s like nothing happened at all only that you're utterly boneless now, with no tenseness left in your tired body. Sex and intimacy and these moments tangled together just like this nest. They don't smell angry at all if anything Jimin's scent fluffs out thicker and more satisfied than before.

Vanilla, chocolate, and honey. All satisfied and sweet thick. The three of them smell so nice together. It has your own scent spiking wildly. You sleepily drag your cheek up Jimin’s throat, hoping it means you'll smell like him later. You hope Jin doesn't mind, that Hobi doesn't mind- the nest is probably going to smell like you for days.  

You're willing to admit that you do feel more clear headed now, although the need to be close re-surges. The need for reassurance spiking and unlike last night Jimin is right there. Yoongi is too. Jungkook- yawning and shriveling his nose cutely.  Everyone has it in their mind for a nap and yet-

Yoongi’s hands comb through your hair, tucking it away from your face, playing with the little baby hairs you have at your temples. The same ones he always tugs, that he loves. Even though he’s never verbally said that he likes them.

“Do you know why you dropped sweetheart? Do you have any idea why? so that we can try and not do it next time?”

“No” you sink lower below the covers. But even they sense that it’s a lie. “Namjoon’s not going to be angry at me? For dropping? When he gets home? Right?”

“Of course not, I know he’s not even angry at you for last night either” You tuck yourself lower almost face to face with Yoongi’s tummy.

“But-“

Jimin straightens, searching the nest for his phone “We can call him right now,” a look at the clock makes him curse though; he’s probably not even out of surgery yet. “Wait okay, we can call him in exactly one hour- here, I’ll even set my timer.”

Jungkook noses along your shoulder. “Somehow, I don’t think that’s what you’re upset about-“

They wait, and with their hands on you, it’s easier not to feel the threat of your words. How is it that being loved is such a medicine to make you unafraid? There was a time when you felt fear more than safety, when not feeling it felt as foreign to you as being loved. You look down at Yoongi's hands and realize how much has changed in the last few months. Your heart feels heavy with it.

“Hobi got punished because of me.”

Your mate stiffens and Jungkook's hand is still hard around your waist, unwilling to let you get more than a centimeter or two away from him. It’s Jimin who snorts, pulling back the covers so that he can really see your face.

He raises his eyebrows, “Do you know how many times my bad ideas have gotten us both a punishment?”

“Or mine” Jungkook adds, wincing. He rubs away his grin on the back of his hand. Now is not the time to get sentimental over happy memories. “There’s a reason why we’re the pups- collectively the pups. We've all fucked up before. Hobi gets that.”

“You mean- it wasn’t- he’s not gonna hate me for it? Again?” Yoongi and Jimin go quiet, but Jungkook leans forward to nuzzle into the nape of your neck.

“I’m going to say something, and I’m going to need you not to freak out over it. Alright?”

You nod, taking a deep breath. Giving Jungkook permission to continue.

He leans forward cupping your cheek and turning your face to his and even with your hands on Yoongi’s chest, blanketed by them- His words still feel like they yank the floor out from underneath you.

Jungkook laces his other hand with yours. thumb skimming down your cheek. “This isn’t like this before. Hobi and you. You’re not like before anymore. But I think you  know that already. I think that’s the real reason why you’re so scared of making him upset."

You can't look at Yoongi, can't meet his eyes with how intensely he's watching your face for your reaction. "When we say you didn’t fuck it up, we say it because we know what things really push Hobi away when he loves us-“  your inhale of breath is so jagged but Jungkook continues anyways “-and it’s not going along with his ideas.”

Jimin hums behind you, agreeing “Hobi likes to pretend that because he’s more submissive than us in bed it means he can’t act like an alpha. But he still likes to be the one in control sometimes. He does it in different ways. He likes to be listened to, to be followed. He likes to look after you when he likes you. He’s probably worried you’re the one mad at him pup.”

You think about all of it. The times that Hobi's taken you to get food, "Can you make it the way I like it?" "Of course, I can." him reaching over to tug at your seatbelt and making sure you're buckled in last night. You think of him taking your sea glass and keeping it safe in his pocket. All of it. He's always looked after you in his own, special, shy way.

Especially last night, when he safeworded for you.

You blush, and immediately re-hide hide your face in the front of Jimin’s shirt. The fact that they know this much, that they've thought on it strikes you as concerning. You wonder if they've been talking about your relationship. You know Jungkook and Tae definitely have- the gossips that they are.

If they knew about the kiss, if Hobi tells them- you wonder what they'll think. You know he hasn’t said a single word about it to anyone yet and you doubt he ever will. You only talk about things you like. You only gush about kisses given that you wanted right? And Hobi pulled away from you so quickly- he can't have wanted it. It had to have been a mistake.

And if that's true, then you have to doubt what Jungkook and Jimin say.

Yoongi's hand carding through your hair feels as familiar as your own. He knows you're not convinced yet. “I promise Hobi’s not mad at you darling.”

Hobi scoffs from the doorway, “Of course I’m not fucking mad at you.”

He has this vaguely ruffled look about him, vaguely off-kilter like he’s spent the last few hours of work bouncing on his heels after he got the text from Yoongi to the group chat. Got the text that Jin wasn’t able to step away quite yet too- and knew the radio silence coming from Namjoon meant you'd be without them. 

Hobi doesn't know why he was so worried, one look at the four of you curled up in the nest, and he knows you've been well taken care of.

You shoot up, nervous, worried about what he might have heard, and painfully aware that you don’t look your best. Your face is probably still all splotchy, tear tracks and messy hair and even messier clothes. You hadn’t even showered after the boxing class and you're not even fucking wearing pants-

Hobi carefully shucks off his slightly muddy sweatshirt. “You’re not?” you ask.

“Why would I be?” he challenges, and even you have to admit you don’t have a good reason for doubting it. Yoongi next to you is so still you think he might have stopped breathing, eyes darting from you to Hoseok. Jungkook inhales a little breath, making an ah- noise that you carefully ignore.  

You only have Hobi, coming close to the nest, lingering. Waiting for something.

He looks okay, okay in a way that you didn’t look this morning, nothing dark or broken in his eyes, nothing at all that supports the fear still itching through you. Taking its nails to everything soft. Hobi's eyes are soft, dark, and still like tide pools, gentle the way the ocean is at low tide.

You sit there, staring at him for a second.

“Can you get in the nest Hobi? Please.” You ask quietly. His eyes go all scared, all fragile for a second before he nods.

An omega asking an alpha to get into a nest can only mean one thing. But you both ignore the subtext of it as he gets on the edge because honestly- the nest is already a little crowded. But Yoongi moves over quick and Jimin sighs, rolling his eyes. You feel like you've missed something important. Something that's hidden in Jungkook's mouth- smiling like that cat that’s just eaten a canary. 

He’s only a body away from you but if you’re being honest- it’s Hobi’s presence in the nest, safe, getting soft touches from the others that lets you banish the last of the sub drop for good.

You watch them as you start to get sleepier and sleepier, trying to keep your eyes open as you watch the others say hello. Yoongi’s hand runs over the hairs at the nape of Hobi's neck. Jimin growls and nudges his shoulder with his forehead in hello. And Jungkook’s happy squeak.

Hobi looks fine, he smells fine when you drag your nose up his hand, dozing in all the pheromones. He lies back. “You alright? Better?” he asks, getting his head on your pillow- when a brief reprieve is offered by Yoongi slinking off to get more lemonade.

(Maybe it’s a little gross that the four of you were sharing one glass of it- but then again Jungkook and Yoongi have both literally tasted your slick before so you think you won’t ever exactly get grossed out by things like this).

Hobi hadn’t known what he would come home to. If you’d been nonverbal like you were at the beginning or if you’d be in omega space. He'd prepared himself for both possibilities and the most likely and most heartbreaking one; that you'd just want to deal with it alone or with just Yoongi.

It eases something tense in his chest that you've clearly been on the receiving even of very thorough aftercare by the look of it. The smell of sadness is distantly sharp on the air. Long soothed, a bad memory.

Hobi doesn’t know why he doubted that Jimin and Yoongi and Jungkook would do a good job. Why he thought for a second today that you might not be alright without him. It’s so stupid, Hobi feels stupid for thinking that. You have your freaking mate right here.

“Yeah,” you say, better, now that you’re home. Better- now that I can see you’re okay. “I’m sorry for making such a big deal over nothing, I’m-“

Hobi shushes you, “Don’t, that’s not- this isn’t a big deal. It’s not- really.” He stresses.

“Okay.” You say, “Okay” you repeat again because now that he’s here you have no idea what to fucking do about it.

You’re feeling so much lighter as the nest gets cracked open, the careful wings widened to accommodate more bodies and shoulders. It gets harder and harder to stay awake especially once Jimin retrieves your blue blanket from the drier and the warm edge gets bundled around you, soft and fluffier than the rest. Soft giggles ferry your tired body as you doze, and cat videos and tictoks get traded until Yoongi shushes them, and tells them to let you sleep.

One by one your packmates come home. You wake for each of them.

First Tae- who comes in a rush much like Hobi, her shoulder-length hair coming loose from her claw clip that she tosses on the bedside table. the clatter of it waking you up. She bundles up close to you, pressing a kiss to your forehead and telling you how good you’re being. Tae is in her pretty lavender-colored blouse but her pants are a bit too scratchy until she changes into softer peach-patterned pajama pants.

She presses her nose to your shoulder, inhaling deep, pulling back with her lips parted, she must have worn a lip stain today because the edge of her cute mouth is all ruddy. "You smell like Minnie" You nudge her nose with yours.

"He took care of me." In the doorway, Jimin tries his best not to blush.

Jin comes home like a whirlwind, gone is his suit jacket and his tie, and his pants aren’t long for this world. You regret the nature of the world each time one of your loves can’t be in pajamas (Really- it’s fucking sucky that they don’t just get to traipse around in nesting clothes all the time). The soft squishy omegan part of your brain feels more and more comfortable stretching out its curious fingers and tugging at them in displeasure.

He's feeling needy too; you wake to Jin’s long fingers running through your hair and down your spine and then going up again checking your body to make sure you're okay. Now that the pack omegas got you, he won’t easily let you go.

Being loved isn’t always harsh touches and harsh kisses. Sometimes being loved looks like being softly herded into the kitchen because someone has to cook and none of you feel like being more than a few feet apart right now. Being loved feels like your big blue blanket wrapped around your shoulders bundled in Yoongi's lap while Jin makes soup. Because soup heals all kinds of ailments- even the bad days like this.

You’re persuaded into a shower to wash off the scent of all the sadness with Jungkook and Jin. Although Jungkook spends more time playing with the bubble bath than really helping wash you or groom you. Usually, he doesn't miss a chance like this.

Your sleepy bodies are pressed flush in the warm water, hungry for nothing but closeness. Jungkook’s wet hair tickles your collarbones when you sit in his lap. His small cock squished against your thigh and your chest pressed to his, nothing sexual but everything intimate about your position.

Kisses pressed to soap-slicked skin that go nowhere let me wash your sadness from you. let me do it with my mouth and make you clean with love. Let me love you in the way that makes you feel the lightest, the most cared for. The purest. let me give you that back. let me make you new. 

One love makes you clean, one love makes you dirty. One makes you big and another small.

After the bath, the two of you sit side by side and let Jin blow-dry your hair. Jin even drags out floor cushions to do just this (especially for your poor bottom, still tender from the spanking last night but not quite red, a reminder that Namjoon had in fact been gentle).

The pack would ordinarily never consider Jungkook to be an obedient pup, but he is a model of perfect behavior for you. Sitting pretty and obedient (but still fidgeting slightly from side to side) while Jin does his hair and then yours. When you start to squirm he drags you sideways into his lap. After you're dry, Jin runs your hair through with a sweet citrusy smelling serum that Jungkook says he likes. You find yourself sniffing his hair to see if you like it too.

After a shower- and a fresh scent mark by the pack omega- you’re right as rain. It surprises no one when you almost fall asleep at the dinner table, fed mouthfuls of sweet strawberry spoon cake (Tae might have picked it up on her way home). A warm belly full of soup and food. Kept in your chair only by Jimin's arm around your middle.

You tried to wait up, but Namjoon doesn’t come home when he’s supposed to. He doesn’t even send a text.

The night drags on- the hours growing longer and longer and then smaller until jin ushers all of you into bed. No matter how much you whine and tug at Jin’s sleeve and say that you're more than capable of staying awake for him. You watch Yoongi and Jin share a distressed look. Namjoon still hasn’t answered any of his texts. How long was his surgery supposed to take again? 12 hours or 15?

That’s a long time for anyone to be awake, let alone for someone to be standing. He’s bound to be tired when he comes home- he’s bound to need the 7 of you.

You want to stay awake, but you’re too worn out from crying and from the boxing class today. Struggling to fight sleep until Jimin makes the move to scruff you, a gentle thing when he sets his teeth against the nape of your neck and tugs. Ushering you gently off to sleep with a small whine.

When you wake next it’s well into the night and Yoongi and Jin are not in the nest.

It takes you a few seconds to detangle yourself from between Tae and Jungkook. Before you even recognize what scent- or more precisely whose- Is tugging you into motion before you’re really awake.

Your alpha- his coffee and liquor scent- is angry and upset. It fills the house, pushing out the scent of you and everyone else. Namjoon never smells this potent, so musky. 

There’s something wrong. 

The first thing you see when you walk into the living room is Namjoon's blood-soaked shoes. The sensible ones he wears during surgery, soaked through from the inside out. You can tell he tried to clean them before he left but the white parts of them are still pink. Like there was so much of it that he couldn't get it all out in one wash. 

 He left them outside. He can't have been home for long because the door is still open, letting in the cold nighttime air. He’s pressed along Jin’s front, Namjoon only ever looks small when he’s pressed to Jin. Even as he pulls back there's something limp in him something worn away. 

You're still not awake enough to piece together his words. “-One second they were fine- stable and then- they just started bleeding and the general surgeon-“ Namjoon only ever talks about the terrible and heartbreaking part of his job with Jin and Yoongi. Not the rest of the pack and not you. Not ever. 

He only ever tells you when his surgeries go well. Not when they go bad, not like this. 

Maybe that’s the reason why he goes silent when he sees you in the doorway, rubbing at your eyes. Namjoon looks more tired than you’ve ever seen him. His silver hair all pushed up at the back like he’d been pulling at it.

You press yourself into his front, letting out a small shattered sound. “I’m okay pup.” but his voice is rough, his eyes wet. “I'm so sorry I couldn't be there for you today- I wish I'd-“ He lets out a shaky breath, and you wrap your arms around his waist. 

 “s’okay joonie, just happy you’re home, got the nest all nice and warm for you- come” you try to tug him but it’s like trying to move a lead weight.

You're so short you only barely come up to the middle of his chest, Jin nuzzles into his cheek, and Namjoon's scent gets impossibly thicker- deeper. It makes you want to roll around in it. 

 It actually makes you weak in the knees. And that's how you know something’s actually wrong. Something must be really wrong for Namjoon to be so sad and still smell so thick and musky. You don't know if he washed the blockers off before he left the hospital or if they just stopped working- or

 You must make a noise- because Namjoon’s looking down at you, your mate pulls at your shoulders trying to shush you- to urge you back to the nest but you’re too sleepy to make sense of it. Can't leave alpha, need to stay by alpha, a small instinctual voice answers in your mind. 

You finally unstick your tongue from the roof of your mouth, breathing in Namjoon’s scent deep and- You go so weak at the knees you almost fall over. 

"What’s wrong- what's going on? Why-“

“Joonie’s going to be fine little love- he’s just-” Your mate flushes, unable to say it.

“It started halfway through, I was scalpel deep in the patient's spine and I couldn’t stop.” Namjoon scrubs a hand down his face, trying to clear himself of the sadness but it only makes him smell stronger. Even Jin straightens his back at that. “-I wanted to rush home the second I got your text too but I couldn’t. I noticed after I got it that I was kind of going crazy and-” 

Jin cups your cheek trying to move you away and give Namjoon some space but Namjoon can’t stop his growl, loud and echoic in the quiet house. threatened by you just stepping away. His hands tighten on you possessively. 

You freeze at the threatening sound but Jin just sighs rolling his eyes. “Oh you big baby- i’m not taking her away from you.”

Namjoon seems on edge as he stares down at you. Eyes flashing in the darkness. Jin sets his hands on his hips, but he knows better than to argue with his alpha when he’s in this condition. 

“Joonie’s going to be fine darling, He’s just touchy because he’s in pre-rut.”

~-~

Please like, Comment, and Reblog <3 If you don’t interact with this chapter, I have no way of knowing if people are still reading and enjoying this series! Every comment help me write the next chapter <3

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Come tell me what you liked about this chapter!

[just-some-random-blogger]

kpop masterlist

🍓 = fluff themes

❄️ = angst themes

🚧 = smut themes

🤸‍♀️ = slice of life / bish idek what theme this is

🚀 = crack fic themes

🎩 = dark and/or violent themes

🏩 = genre fic, i.e. mystery, horror, fantasy, etc

🍳 = slow burn

🦕 = personal favorite

back to main masterlist

A.C.E.

Memory | 🍓❄️🦕 Kim Byeongkwan x Reader + Park Junhee x Reader (University AU) [Blurb]

Ateez

Only One | 🍓❄️❄️❄️🍳🦕 CEO!Choi San x Reader

BigBang

It’s An Act [WBU I] | ❄️ Choi Seunghyun (TOP) x Reader

Smoke | 🍓🤸‍♀️ Choi Seunghyun (TOP) x Reader

BTS

Runaway | 🍓❄️🏩 Mafia!Kim Seokjin (Jin) x Reader (Mafia AU) Preview 1 2 3 4 x

Mah Boyfriend | 🍓🍓🤸‍♀️🦕 Jung Jungkook x Idol!Reader

BTOB

Hidden Heart | 🍓🍓🍓🤸‍♀️🚀🍳 Lee Minhyuk (HUTA) x Idol!Reader [Headcanon]

Day6

A University Dilemma | 🤸‍♀️ Kang Younghyun (Young-K) x Reader (Univeristy AU)

What A Joke | ❄️ Kang Younghyun (Young K) x Reader + Park Jaehyung x Reader (University AU) [Blurb]

So... Haha... I Like You | 🍓🦕 Park Jaehyung x Reader (Fake Dating AU)

EXO

Wheel Of Fortune | 🍓🍳🚀 Park Chanyeol x Reader [Headcanon]

Welcome To The Jungle | 🚀🚀🚀🏩 Park Chanyeol & Oh Sehun (Jungle AU)

Maybe We Still Have A Shot [WBU III] | 🍓🍓🏩 CatHybid!Oh Sehun x Reader (University AU)

Unrequited Attraction | 🚧🏩🍳🦕 Mafia!Kim Jongdae (Chen) x Retail Worker!Reader

Color Palette | 🍓 Byun Baekhyun x Reader [Blurb]

Brown Leaves | 🍓 Kim Jongin (Kai) x Reader (University AU)

GOT7

One Million In One Day | 🍓🍓❄️❄️🍳 Sugar Daddy!Jackson Wang x Reader Preview ~ Alternate Moodboard ~ Moodboard Teaser  1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 

Car Rides | 🍓 Jackson Wang x Reader [Blurb]

Juice Box | 🍓🚀🏩🦕 Kunpimook Bhuwakul Bambam x Reader [Blurb] (Pre-Schooler AU)

Somewhere In Between | ❄️❄️Civil Engineer!Park Jinyoung x Reader + Architect!Henry Lau x Reader

Trading Secrets | 🍓🍓 Kim Yugyeom x WangSis!Reader

JYJ

Winning Losses | ❄️ Kim Jaejoong x Idol!Reader

Monsta X

Introspect | 🍓🤸‍♀️ Lee Jooheon x Reader [Blurb]

Letting Off Steam | 🤸‍♀️ Lee Hoseok (Wonho) x ArtStudent!Reader (University AU)

NCT

Seventeen

December Dates | 🍓🚀 bf!Seventeen x Reader [Headcanon]

The Stroke Of Midnight | 🍓❄️🏩🦕 Mafia!Kwon Soonyoung (Hoshi) x Reader

Here's My Problem: I Can't Get You Out Of My Head | ❄️❄️❄️🎩🎩🎩🏩🍳🦕 Detective!Jeon Wonwoo x Actress!Reader

10 Ways To Get Over Gyu | 🍓❄️❄️❄️🍳🍳🦕 Kim Mingyu x Reader + others (Childhood AU)

Half Of My Heart | 🍓❄️🤸‍♀️🍳 Kim Mingyu x Reader + Jeon Wonwoo x Reader (CEO AU)

On A Thread | ❄️❄️ CEO!Joshua Hong (Hong Jisoo) x Nurse!Reader

SF9

A Final Offering | 🍓🍓❄️🏩🦕 Deity!Kim Inseong & Child!Reader + Baek Juho (Zuho) x Mom  

What Does It Mean? | 🍓❄️🤸‍♀️ Kim Inseong x Reader + Lee Jaeyoon x Reader (University AU) 

16th Floor | 🍓🤸‍♀️ Kim Seokwoo (Rowoon) x Reader (Office AU)

SHINee

Understand This |❄️ Choi Minho x Reader I Don’t Understand [Understand This II] | ❄️ Choi Minho x Reader

It’s All A Big Joke [WBU II] | ❄️ Lee Taemin x Reader

Th-that’s Not | ❄️❄️🚧🦕 Lee Taemin x Reader Regrets [Th-that’s Not II] | ❄️ Lee Taemin x Reader

Angel Bride | ❄️🚧🏩🦕 Pirate!Lee Taemin x Reader

Noona, You're So Pretty | 🍓 Lee Taemin x Noona!Reader

Stray Kids

Professional Boundaries | 🍓❄️🚧🦕 CEO!Bang Chan x Pre-School Teacher!Reader + CEO!Hwang Hyunjin x Pre-School Teacher!Reader 1 2 3 4 

Bootylicious | 🍓🚀 Bang Chan x Idol!Reader

Super Junior

The Soup | 🍓🍓🚀🚀 SuJu x SuJu Maknae!Reader [Headcanon]

Secrets Of A Maknae | 🍓🚀🚀 Kim Heechul x SuJuMaknae!Reader

The Boyz

Gentle With Me | 🍓🍓🤸‍♀️ Lee Sangyeon x Reader

TVXQ!

Pitter-Patter | 🍓 Jung Yunho (U-Know) x Reader (Pre-School Teacher AU)

The Art Of Deception | ❄️🎩🏩 Shim Changmin x Reader (Secret Agent/Spy AU)

TXT

Forget About It | 🍓❄️🤸‍♀️🍳🦕 Choi Soobin x Reader (University AU)  

WINNER

I’m Not Playing | 🍓❄️❄️ Gangster!Song Minho (Mino) x Reader 1 2 3 

[kpopyourcherryy]

Hey Everyone! It's Jade~

I feel like I keep going on and off from this site It's just not what it used to be imo ever since that big policy change forever ago now But anyways!

I decided to fully get back into writing, a lot has happened in my personal life so I have more time and have found my passion for it again. If you wanna support your girl pls go support me on Dreame; The Love You Want-Dreame

Or

Good Ol' Wattpad; The Love You Want - jxxde - Wattpad

I'll be transferring some of my stories to both sites and kind of creating a book of short stories for each group I've written about, and for my longer collabs with my dear Maya (i miss you bitch idk if you're even still on here :,/) I'll put them in separate "books" of their own so they're kind of like micro novellas.

I also have another book in the works that is a Mafia AU! so be on the look out for that one as well!

And before I go, one of the stories I plan on reworking heavily and really fleshing out to make something super cool is Playing With Fire, my Demon! Wonho fic. It's one I go back to and always fall back into love with. I also have plans to continue 3 years on both sites too, just possibly reworking a bit.

I'd like to think that my long-winded hiatus is finally over <3 ~

Please support me on my little writing journey one more time my loves <3 Feel free to send an inbox here at any time I miss you guys terribly!

With love & light, Your Jade ~

[linos-luna]

Update + Answering some questions.

I got a few questions in my inbox and i thought I should do one big post. 💞

1. I was asked if I write Mafia AU.

- No. Personally I just don’t think I’m good at it. When I get better and more confident I’ll do it in the future. ☺️

2. Asked about how I write y/n and tags

- All my fics have [insert name] x poc reader in the tags because I want everyone to feel included. I try and avoid descriptions like hair color, hair type, and skin color unless specifically requested.

- Also, y/n in my fics are assumed to be 21 and up. Most fics I base off my own age of 25 unless asked specifically for younger. I personally don’t feel too comfortable writing y/n as a 18 or 19 year old. It just feels like still a teenager 😅 From 18-20, I personally still felt like a child so that’s just me lol.

- Also. Y/n is always fem or AFAB unless specified or asked.

3. Asked if I write in other languages or if yall can translate my work.

- I could write in Spanish but I prefer English since it’s a more universal language.

- if you wanna translate my work and post, just lemme know. Most times I’ll say yes. After translating, Please send to me. And when you post it, make sure to tag me and link the original to give proper credit.

4. Are any of the pictures you use in fics, pictures of you?

- Yes. Some are. I guess it’s up to you to figure out which ones lol

5. Other groups.

I’ve been asked for fics for other groups I’m not too familiar with. So I’ll give a list of who I DO write for.

- Stray Kids (mostly)

- BTS (mostly)

- TXT

- Monsta x/ Wonho

- NCT 127

Ive been in an out of treatment due to my car accident back in January. I get bad headaches and memory loss 😀 but don’t worry, my boss(who’s a lawyer) is taking care of it so I’m well taken care of when it comes to that. Settlement will be reached soon to compensate for my bills, pain, suffering, and time missed from work. I’m taking it easy. Popping in when I remember too lol.

Here’s my Ko Fi if you wanna support ☺️

[miabebe]

I Am What I Am (II)

A man of the shadows and a woman who belonged in the skies - fate could not have brought two more different people together. But was this fate or was this a choice?

Pairing - Im Changkyun x OC, OC x Surprise Seventeen member hehe

Word Count - 7.7K

Warnings - Nothing too explicit but mentions of blood, guns, knives, violence, (t.w) references to suicide, murder, making out again cause why not

Chapter summary - As secrets of the dark begin to come to light, Na bi has to fight the desires clouding her mind. More so that ever when red starts to stain the black.

| Previous Chapter | Masterlist |

“I need to sit.”

Na bi peered into the darkness and her eyes fell on a couch at the far end of the room. Changkyun simply watched, buttoning his sleeves as she pushed with all her might, bringing it to the centre and plopping down on it. Her legs sure thanked her, but the fire in the pits of her stomach had reignited as she looked at him from a considerably lower and painstaking angle, standing before the table.  

“Why are you here Ms. Baek?”  

Na bi pursed her lips in thought. Honestly, she forgot. The sight of him had blown every ounce of reasoning out of her head. Sure, driving the car down an empty freeway at 140 kmh had adrenaline coursing through every inch of her body and yeah, maybe her ‘interaction’ earlier with that gentleman in the club had gotten her to some kind of high but she didn’t think she would ever find it this hard to get it together. There was nothing she could really process except him and the slender yet sculpted build of his body. He didn’t look very menacing but he didn’t seem like he was gentle either. Na bi wondered if he was the kind who liked it slow and teasing or hard and fast, not that she would have a problem with either-  

Crossing her legs to keep it all in, she leaned back into the softness of the couch, mentally and physically pushing herself to the maximum possible distance away from this man.

“Who are you?”  

“You already asked me that.” The corners of his lips curled into a smile. “And I already answered.”  

“And I heard you.” She tilted her head in question. “But I’ve never heard of you before.”  

“Not many have.” He tucked his hands into his pockets. “I am a myth Ms. Baek. The knowledge of my existence is a privilege.” 

Na bi let her eyes scan him down then up. Recalling the way he stayed concealed in the shadows the first time she met him, she scoffed. “Privilege or liability?” 

When he didn’t clarify, she clicked her tongue, shaking her head dramatically. “So you are hiding.” She sighed. “That's sad; you were a lot more interesting when you didn’t admit to being a coward.”  

Changkyun smiled, unaffected. “I don’t expect or need you to understand Ms. Baek. Ignorance is a luxury people like you can afford.” 

Maybe if Na bi was less drunk, she would have been sensible enough to be offended by that but she simply pouted. “Enlighten me then.” 

“What you call cowardice is gameplay Ms. Baek.” He leaned against the desk behind him. “My identity is irrelevant, so I choose anonymity. I let my work speak for itself.” 

“So who gets, as you call it, the privilege of knowing who you are?”    

“The few who have business with me, my men” He cocked his head, looking at her. “And you.”  

Na bi felt a strange combination of fear, exhilaration and curiosity grip her all at once.  

“No one else?”  

Changkyun shook his head.  

She took a minute to take it all in. She should have been more afraid. She really should.

“Sounds a little unfortunate if you ask me.” He raised an eyebrow as she leaned towards him, half whispering. “Having all this power and no one afraid of it.”

“I don’t seek fear because I don’t thrive on it Ms. Baek.” He mirrored her, leaning too. “Imagine what I could have done to you if fear was what I wanted.”

Na bi felt a single bead of sweat roll down her neck.

“Then what do you want from me? Why are your men stalking me?” When Changkyun looked at her expressionlessly, she rolled her eyes. “Don’t deny it. They haven’t been subtle and I’m not blind.”

“No, you’re not.” She could practically hear the amusement in his voice, like he had observed the way her eyes were all over him.

He walked around his desk, pulled open the drawer, taking out a familiar picture and threw it onto the wooden surface of the table. Na bi got up, walking closer to it, picking the photo of Ana in her hands, the same one Wonho had shown her that night.

“That’s from the cctv of my headquarters a few days ago. Your friend Ana, turned up at a location that no one other than me and my men know of, asking for me, by my name."

Na bi frowned. “How did she know where to find you?”

“Your skipping sequence Ms. Baek” Changkyun walked past her, sitting down on her chair. “How did she even know of my existence in the first place? The range of my business acquaintances does not extend to people like her.”

“How do you suppose she knew?”

He hummed. “Assumption is judgement’s biggest enemy Ms. Baek. I was hoping to have a conversation with her to let her explain herself, but that was the last time anyone had seen or heard from her.” Na bi didn’t even realise when he got hold of the lighter he began playing with. “And incidentally, while looking for her-”

“-your men kidnapped me.”

He nodded. “It was a mistake and it is my fault you got roped in this mess and so, it’s only fair that until all this gets over, I look out for you.” Changkyun watched her face scrunched in confusion. “Ms. Baek, there are a lot of dark and dangerous things hidden in the shadows of Seoul. My identity holds a higher value than you can imagine. Should anyone get the idea that you might have even the slightest clue as to who I am, they would hunt you down for answers.”

“So, all these days, your men were…” Na bi blinked at a loss of words. “Protecting me?"

He gave a small nod.  

Na bi stared at him. Of all the reasons she had imagined for his men stalking her, this was nowhere on the list. 

“You’re telling me that rather than eliminating someone who might be a threat to your identity which you apparently so carefully safeguard, you chose to employ your men to work round the clock to protect her? All because she was a mistake?” Na bi stared at him incredulously before letting out a surprising short laugh. “Oh, you absolute asshole.” 

For the first time, Changkyun’s expression betrayed his thoughts – it was a mixture of annoyance, confusion and amusement all in one.

“Either you habitually don’t think twice before you talk,” His voice was suddenly a lot deeper. “Or you’re not afraid of much when you’re drunk Ms. Baek.” 

“Please,” She scoffed. “I’m not afraid of much when I’m sober either. There is not much to fear if you’re not afraid of death, and I see death every day.”

Na bi walked up to him, her shadow falling on his darkening expression.

“You’re not protecting me and this is not just about Ana. Someone like her cannot possibly be a threat to you.”

The image of those armed men in Ana’s house flashed in Na bi’s head. The only reason another group of dangerous people were after Ana had to be for Changkyun.

“Someone else is looking for you. Someone who is a part of those dark and dangerous things you claim are in the shadows of Seoul. Evidently, they are aware that Ana has you all figured it out and they knowing getting to her means getting to you, but you....You don’t know who they are, do you?”  

She walked around the chair, her fingers tracing it.  

“Ana was your only link to them but she’s missing. You knew, whoever they are, if they learn of me, they will come after me instead. That’s why I’m alive, that’s why I’m being monitored. I’m bait, aren’t I?”  

She leaned down, meeting him eye to eye. 

“Or did I misjudge the depth of your character?” 

Now that she was much closer to him, her eyes once again began wandering across his face and she wondered why she was not more annoyed or aggravated at the realisation of how she was being recklessly played around by him. Changkyun on the other hand was silent for a whole minute, looking right back into her eyes before his lips curled into a smile.  

“I think I misjudged the level of your intelligence Ms. Baek.”  

Na bi pulled herself back feeling victorious but he got up, on his feet, eliminating the little distance she put between them. “But you are transparent and lack depth so you think everyone is as one dimensional as you are.” This time she felt her fists ball in anger. “Had you not given in to your saviour complex and unnecessarily curious nature, you wouldn’t have become the potential target that you are now. It’s not me but you who brought you to where you are,” He took the picture from her, freeing her hands. “But just because there were other reasons to keep my eye on you, doesn’t mean I wasn’t looking out for you.”  

Na bi knew those were empty words from him but she couldn’t help but feel a weight drop in her stomach. It didn’t help that he was standing so close, and it helped even less when Na bi took a step closer to him, doing the top button of his vest that he had missed.  

“Prove it then.” She smoothened the fabric on his chest nonchalantly before looking up at him. “Take me home.”  

“Wonho will drop you- “  

“Not him. You.”  

He sighed. “Ms. Baek. If you haven’t figured out already, I don’t come out in the open.” 

“You said you wanted to protect me, didn’t you?” She licked her drying lips. “So, it’s you or no one.”

Changkyun’s eyes flickered down there, just for a second before he met her eyes again. “I’m inviting trouble keeping you around, aren’t I?” 

Na bi smiled as she walked out, knowing he would follow.

The ride to her house was pretty silent.  

In that half an hour, Na bi understood Changkyun wasn’t much of a talker. If she had nothing to say, neither did he. Conveniently enough though, he would at least answer her questions when she had any and she had very few questions.  

Okay, she only had one question.  

“Are you getting married?”  

Changkyun momentarily took his eyes off the road to throw her a glance, clearly not expecting that of all things. Well, he for starters, he was all suited up - not a crease in sight, not a hair out of place, smelling like a very distracting combination of whiskey and roses but the watch on his hand, it looked old, like a choice of sentiment rather than style.   

“You look very marry-able right now.”  

“Why Ms. Baek,” His voice was laced with amusement. “Would you like to?”  

“Hell no.” Na bi scoffed, looking out of the window at all the buildings whizzing by. Sure, she was attracted to him, hormones and alcohol clearly amplifying it all but that was about it. “You and I can’t possibly be meant to be.”  

Changkyun hummed. In thought? In agreement? She had no idea. But that was the only conversation they had the whole way home. She wanted to ask more; of course, she wanted to. Curiosity was Na bi’s fatal flaw but either this really expensive BMW’s smooth navigation was lulling her to sleep or Seoul’s air was laced with some sort of sedative tonight – whatever it was, she was progressively losing grip over herself, so uncharacteristically, she shut up.  

When the car came to a stop in front of her building, Na bi rolled her head over to look at Changkyun – he was already looking at her. She definitely wanted to say something, either a thank you or goodnight, but whatever it was, under his gaze, yet again, she forgot. Not a word was exchanged, neither was any emotion - there was no sadness over a goodbye, no longing to see each him again. But in the silence of the night and the small space that held them at an arm’s distance from each other, there was one thing that was definitely there – a meaningless craving. A desire so electrifying that she could practically taste it in the air and feel it in the way every cell in her body was fighting the idea of just pulling him closer. Na bi wondered if he felt that too; she couldn’t tell.   

When Changkyun made the slightest movement towards her Na bi immediately felt her breath get stuck in her throat and her heart race in her chest. At first, he simply unbuckled her seat belt and she had begun to get disappointed but then she felt him lean closer. Though this was exactly what she wanted, though he was what her body was so desperately seeking, Na bi felt her eyes close reflexively, her hands gripping whatever it could on the seat.  

“The lights are on.”  

Frowning, her eyes flew open to see Changkyun still a considerable distance from her, his eyes fixed on something else entirely, far behind her. Following his line of vision, she realised he was staring at the windows of her house, the only one with lights on at 3am.  

“Yeah well,” She hoped to god he didn’t notice her reaction earlier. “I don’t live in the dark.”  

“Did you leave them on before you left?”  

She shrugged unable to remember. Changkyun’s expression darkened as he unbuckled his own seatbelt and stepped out of his car, making her hurriedly mirror his actions.  

“Wait,” Na bi pointlessly lowered her voice. “You think they found me?”   

He continued staring at the window for a moment before he quickly made his way into her building and up the stairs. Swearing under her breath and barely able to balance herself, Na bi followed, stupidly trying to keep up with a man who seemed to move at the speed of light. By the time they climbed four floors and had reached her house, she was a panting mess but he was still perfect, not a crease, not a hair out of place.  

“9963.” She blurted, giving him the password to her door, only belatedly realising what she had done. Before she could fully comprehend the consequences of her actions, he opened her door and stepped in. Standing by the frame, Na bi watched, still out of breath and in awe as he moved around so cautiously and so quietly, like he was made of a gas or something. It took a good five minutes of looking around before the tightness in his shoulders finally relaxed and he turned to her.  

“Looks like you’re safe.” 

“And of course you sound disappointed.” Na bi mumbled under her breath.  

The trap they were using her to set up still hadn’t led them to their prey. If only he had managed to get his hands on someone tonight, if only he got the answers he was looking for, a lot of her problems could have been solved. Kicking off her shoes, she walked in, sinking into the couch. Changkyun’s eyes followed her across the room.  

“Are you going to leave now?”  

Na bi looked up at the man, pushing her urges down yet again for the nth time now. Earlier today, when he called her transparent, he was right. There was nothing hidden in the way she looked at him – the desire in her eyes was as clear as day.

But his gaze was as dark as the night. He seemed so layered and unreadable and as much as she wanted to unravel all that he kept hidden away in the shadows, she didn’t think she should. Some things were meant to hold on to, and some weren’t and as Na bi herself had claimed earlier, this wasn’t meant to be. She had to let him go.  

. 

. 

. 

“Stay.”  

“Dr. Baek, are you listening to me?”  

Instantly snapping out of her trip down the memory lane, Na bi looked up at her attending and the entire team looking at her, waiting. Realising that she had in fact, not been listening, her eyes quickly flickered between the patient’s vitals on the screen and the paper in her hand. Swallowing on nothing, she took a shot in the dark, praying to whatever gods were out there that she had analysed the situation right.  

“Yeah, yeah, I shall uh… do a head CT and set him up for an LP?”  

That eyebrow of her attending raised in question, lowered a little. “And get his fever under control.” 

Na bi quickly nodded, taking notes and sighing inwardly with relief as the team continued the morning rounds. Close. She had been letting her mind wander a bit too much. Not only was the horrible hangover headache making it hard to stay grounded to reality, her thoughts too were all over the place, mostly trying recollect the events of last night which she had navigated drunk off her face. Now was neither the time nor the place for it but clearly, self-control was not one of Na bi’s virtues. It was only when the patient next to her violently retched and threw up onto the floor that she finally got it together and put her thoughts behind her.  

An hour and three separate crises-es later, Na bi found herself catching a short break as she walked down the corridor from the pantry, looking out of the window at the greying sky. Seoul was uncharacteristically gloomy today. Peeling the orange in her hand, she popped a piece in her mouth, eyes scouring through the crowd of people scattered around, looking at their feet in particular. No combat shoes.  

When Na bi woke up that morning, the sun was already way up in the sky, giving her just enough time to quickly change into a fresh pair of clothes, grab her bag and run out of her house. It was only when she had finished gobbling her breakfast and finally had some substantial energy in her that she noticed the absence of Changkyun’s men - There was no one in combat boots.  

She didn’t know how to feel about that. It was evident from last night that Changkyun’s enemy, whoever that was, hadn’t identified her yet so she was in no immediate danger but she didn’t still understand the sudden disappearance of her apparent protection squad. The voice of reason in her head told her that she was merely a pawn in whatever game Changkyun was playing and this was probably just another one of his moves. Her gut feeling though, begged to differ – it said something had to have gone wrong.  

It was when both voices that were battling it out in her head that she felt a tap on her shoulder and the orange peel in her hand was replaced by a small bottle.  

“Drink up.”  

Na bi turned to see Seokmin, her closest friend at work handing her the hangover tonic he frequently used.  

“Hell no, that’s bitter as fuck.”  

“Get it together Baek.” He crossed his arms. “This is a hospital; you’re a doctor and you look like shit.”  

“Thanks.” She murmured, cracking the seal open, trying not to taste the horrible liquid as she drank it.   

“What happened last night?”  

Na bi drank slower to avoid answering. He did kindly invite her out last night and so she did owe him some sort of explanation but what even was she supposed to say? I shot a man in the leg, stole his car, met up with a mafia leader, insisted he drive me home and then we…. It sounded absolutely insane even in her head, who would even believe her?  

First off, mafia supposedly didn’t even exist in Seoul. After the famous Crime WipeOut operation back in 2011, the streets were declared ‘crime free’ – the cops had been advertising their success with that phrase for years now. But everyone knew that was not true. Working in the emergency room, Na bi especially knew that was not true. Every other day, people would walk in with all sorts of injuries, claiming they “fell down the stairs” or “got hit by a car” when their wounds clearly told another story. No one would dare question them though, not when they could feel the outline of a weapon in their pockets.  

And now Na bi’s encounter last night had confirmed facts. Mafia very much did exist in Seoul and somehow suddenly, thanks to one man, she found herself deep, right in the middle of it all. It would be unfair to Seokmin to drag him into it too.  

“I wish I remembered it all.” That was as honest as she could get with him - there was indeed a big gap in her memory of last night's events that she just couldn't recollect no matter how hard she tried.

“I need my blue pajamas.” Na bi put down the seat of the toilet and sat on it, crossing her legs, feeling much better having thrown up. She was definitely talking to Changkyun about something before she felt her stomach turn and ran to bathroom - she tried hard to remember what exactly that conversation was about again but it was pointless, she had no idea. The earlier suited man who now somehow only had his white shirt on, appeared by the door, holding out a navy-blue set of pajamas but she shook her head. “Not these ones.” 

“Nearly everything in there is blue.” 

“I like blue.” 

“This is blue.” 

“But this is not the blue I like.” 

Changkyun didn't reply but his silence was loud.  

“What? Didn’t you say you wanted to make sure I’m safe?” 

“And safety includes a specific blue pajama?” 

Na bi slid off the toilet and walked past him to her wardrobe, pouting. “I feel safe in those blue pajamas.” 

She scoured through her clothes while he stood behind her, not too close but perhaps close enough to catch her if she stumbled. 

“These.” She held up an old, faded pair of sky-blue pajamas. “These belong to my sister but this is me.” She pointed at the print of small white butterflies on the fabric then to herself. “Baek Na bi. White butterfly.” 

And then without a warning to herself or him, Na bi pulled her shirt over her head, stripping out of her clothes. At that point, Changkyun who’s eyes were focused on her all this while, looked away, making her suddenly very conscious of her actions. Actions she didn’t seem to put much thought into; which wasn’t very unlike her but something felt different today - it was almost like she was made of two minds. Unfortunately, the second one was hell bent on being honest and irrational.

“I think…” She pulled up her pants, adjusting the elastic, looking him up then down. “I think I’m really attracted to you.” 

He turned to look at her with a raised eyebrow, looking amused. “I think you should sleep Ms. Baek.” 

Something did a somersault in Na bi’s chest. “With you?” 

.

.

“Would you like to?” He leaned against her dresser, crossing his arms.  

.

.

.

She mimicked him, leaning back against her wardrobe.  “Very much.” 

.

.

.

When those words left her mouth, Na bi had no idea what she expected the consequences to be. She had no idea what exactly transpired between them after that either.

As far she remembered, they were on opposite ends of the room and she was looking into his unreadable eyes for just one clue about what he wanted. Then, suddenly, somehow, they were standing right across each other, inches apart in a loud silence where she could only hear her heart race in her chest. She didn't know if Changkyun felt even an ounce of what she was feeling, or if he too wanted her as much as she craved him and there was only one way to find out.  

Lord knows where Na bi got the courage, or why she gave into the stupidity but impulsively, she got on her tiptoes, hands grabbing his shirt to pull him closer and let her lips softly brush his, which to her surprise, parted. Na bi saw a hundred different things flash in his eyes, but none of them seemed like a no, so she kissed him again, more certain this time, closing the gap till there was nothing between them. His hands grabbed her waist as she stumbled, setting off something hot in her chest. 

And just like that they walked back entwined, lips not leaving each other till the back of his knees hit her bed, prompting her to push him onto it, finally giving them the space to breathe. Changkyun looked up at her with his hooded eyes, his hands sinking into the comforter behind him. There was something undeniably hot about him just sitting on her bed like that, doing nothing but watching her. He was letting her make the moves. 

And so she did, standing between his thighs, taking his face into her hands, leaning forward to kiss him once again. She didn’t know if his arm wrapped around her, pulling her into his lap, or if she climbed on the bed, straddling him, but here they were, just mouths moving, tongues roaming and hearts beating real fast. Na bi felt herself getting lost in that pleasure, her hips naturally finding a rhythm against him but his arm around her held her in place. He lifted her and with a swift motion, her back hit the bed and he was hovering above her, exploring her face with his eyes. She pushed the strand of his hair which escaped its place, before she noticed the small healed wound on his eyebrows, her fingers tracing them. 

“What happened here?” 

One breath.

Then two.  

“Hit the corner of the table when I was running away.” 

“Running away from what?” 

“The people who killed my family.” 

Na bi blinked – she did not expect that candor. Or his lack of hesitation.  

She stroked it softly, “Does it still hurt?” 

What a pointless question. The wound looked old, like it had been years since he got it. Na bi realised with a pang in her chest that he must’ve been young when this happened. It must hurt like hell. 

She propped herself on her elbows and reached up, planting a small kiss on it, obviously a very apt medical solution. “Better?” 

For the first time, he let out a soft laugh, a genuine one.  

Na bi kissed it again and again and again, slowly making her way down his face, finding his lips with hers once more. Yet again, time was lost on her. She just felt an undeniable, craving need for him, to feel him, to own him. This is what it must feel like to burn from within. 

She let herself sink into the softness of her comforter, freeing her hands to unbutton his shirt when his arm under her tightened pushing her up her bed, neither action hindering their mouths on each other. Na bi had her fair share of experience with men but nothing ever felt like this and they weren't even doing much. The attraction she felt towards him was like never before, it didn't even allow her to think rationally. She knew they should stop - she was drunk and he was a stranger, a dangerous one at that, but she couldn't bring herself to. And just as she wondered if he too could not stop himself, she felt him pull back. 

“Na bi….” His voice was so soft? “You should sleep.” 

“Don’t want to….” She muttered, pulling him closer, but he didn’t give in. 

“Sleep.” 

He rolled off her as she groaned, pulling herself together, curling up into a comfortable position. He was right - even though she wanted him, her body needed sleep. And to stop this madness. She tucked her palm under her head and watched him by the frame of her bedroom door, buttoning his shirt, looking back at her.

She had expected him to be gone before she knew it. 

“Aren’t you going to go?”   

“I’ll leave when you sleep.” 

The stomach somersaults were back.  

“Will I ever see you again?” 

He didn’t answer her question.   

“Don’t go around doing something stupid.”  

She chuckled, pulling her sheets closer, feeling her eyes flutter shut under the warmth of the covers. “You don’t mean that." She yawned. "Because if I don’t then your enemies won’t find me. And if they don’t find me, you won’t find them.”  

“Ms. Baek,” Na bi looked at him one last time as sleep finally took her in. “Please don’t do anything stupid.”  

Trying to ignore Changkyun’s last words still ringing in her mind, Na bi pulled herself back to reality, continuing the conservation. “I should’ve let you know before I left Min-ah, sorry.”

“Yeah, you should’ve.” Seokmin leaned against the window. “I worry about safety. It can get crazy out there.”

Na bi nodded. He had no idea.  

She had no idea about a lot of things either.

She had no idea what Changkyn’s actions last night meant. Or his words. Was he attracted to her? If he was then why did he stop? And if he wasn’t, didn’t that mean he was using her, just like she suspected he was? And if he was using her then why did he ask her not to do anything crazy? How was she of any use to him if she wasn’t an efficient trap? Or was she wrong? Was she not a bait? And he truly mean what he said about looking out for her? But if he did mean that then where were all his men today??  

Na bi felt like she could crush the bottle she was holding with her bare hands. All these questions were just turning into a never-ending loop that she was stuck right in the middle of with no answers and no escape. She needed to get her mind off all this.  

“Crazy workload today?” She pointed at all the case files in her friend's hand, desperate for a change of topic. He shook his head, looking down at the corridor as a patient was wheeled out, white sheet covering their face. When a hand slipped from under the covers from the inertia, Na bi noticed the cut across the wrist.  

“There was nothing I could do.” Seokmin sighed. “He bled out.”  

“Cut that deep?”  

“Two cuts. One on each wrist.”  

Na bi felt the bile rise in her throat.  

“Let me guess, family doesn’t suspect any foul play?”  

“The usual.”  

Seokmin handed the files to the intern who meekly walked up to him before she took them and rushed off.

Everyone in the ER knew of these cases, Na bi had seen a couple of them up close before – cases determined as self-inflicted injury, completely ignoring the fact that it was not one but two clean cuts on both wrists. Anyone with a pair of eyes and a brain could tell that was clearly not self inflicted but somehow, these cases would never reach the point of investigation. The family didn't dare push them and medical staff did not have the authority to – they just went on to become yet another record on paper.  

The mere thought of such cruelty made Na bi's stomach turn. She wondered how anyone believed that evil did not exist in Seoul when she saw evidence of it in every corner, at every given moment - even the very next one.  

Ambulance sirens.  

Both her and Seokmin immediately looked at each other, ears perking at the sound of not one, not two but sirens of seven ambulances getting increasingly loud. 

True to her training, Na bi immediately flung the bottle in her hand into a nearby trashcan and rushed to the entrance with Seokmin right behind her, pulling her hair into a higher and tighter ponytail. The rest of the doctors and nurses had already assembled, prepping to take on the load of cases that was about to walk in. But given that 'smooth-sailing' was just not a part of the emergency department's vocabulary, the head nurse ran up to her, a worried look on her face. “Dr. Baek, Dr. Yoo isn’t here.”  

Fuck, she forgot - the attending had left right after morning rounds for a conference in Busan which meant-  

“Jaehyun is in charge.” Seokmin concluded, voicing her thoughts as the three of them turned and looked across the corridor.

Jaehyun's face was as white as the wall behind him, hands shaking. Shit. Sure he was two years her senior which theoretically meant he was the most experienced person here to lead the room but Na bi knew he didn't have the stomach for what was coming; especially when the hospital doors opened and all she saw was blood. Blood, blood, blood, everywhere. 

“Who’s in charge?” A paramedic looked around urgently while Na bi continued looking at a frozen Jaehyun. “Who’s in charge???” 

There was no time for incompetence. Not right now. 

“I’m taking over.” She whispered to Seokmin before she stepped up. “Me, Dr. Baek. What happened?” 

“Traffic accident.” He panted. “That’s what they said on the call but I don’t think so. Seems more like a…..” 

Na bi looked around the room, her vision tunneling on the details. There were almost 40 men, most of them were severely injured, but it was definitely not a traffic accident. They had massive gashes, wounds that looked like they were cut by something sharp, like a knife. The bruises on their eyes and mouth, those were obviously landed from a fist and the way some of their ribs and arms seemed broken, this was definitely a - 

“Gang fight.” They said at the same time.  

“They’re criminals.” Seokmin whispered, his voice laced with hesitancy.  

Na bi took a deep breath and slipped on her gloves. “And we’re doctors.”

Na bi closed the door of the storage room behind her, finally getting away from it all. 

It had been 3 hours. 3 intensive hours but to be honest, it wasn’t as bad as she expected; she had seen far worse days. While there was copious amounts of blood, the wounds weren’t so deep or severe that a few stitches and dressing couldn’t handle. About five of them had to be sent for emergency surgery and were now being monitored in the intensive care. Those who had fractures were scanned and appropriately bandaged and those who had rushed here accompanying their companions were detained in a separate room till the cops arrived.  

Na bi had no choice but to ask Seokmin to call for law enforcement. Given how they were taking their own sweet time to come, maybe she was mistaken about the gravity of the situation but she had assumed that she couldn’t just brush 40 people injured by violence under the rug – it was necessary to get the police involved. Regardless of the fact that every single one of those brought in was wearing combat boots. 

Cracking the joints of her neck, she gripped the metal bars of the shelf before her and briefly shut her eyes.

The faces of those who were brought in today flashed before her– she didn’t recognise any of them. None of those who used to follow her were there, neither was Wonho and neither was Changkyun. Na bi didn’t know why it was necessary for her to find out but the moment she noticed the combat boots, her first instinct was to look for Changkyun. It wasn’t like she deeply cared for him or anything; it was more because of curiosity. Of course, it was plain old curiosity, what else could it be-  

Her eyes flew open at the subtle sound of the carboard boxes - Someone was in the room.  

Pretending not to notice, yet extremely cautiously, she looked around for the spare supplies she came for and true to her intuition, just as she tried to reach for the gauzes at the back of the shelf, she felt a presence press against her back and something sharp and cold pricking her neck. 

“Where is he?” 

Na bi wouldn’t have screamed, she recognised that voice but she felt a hand cover her mouth anyway. She tried to struggle free from it but the tip of the knife against her skin inched deeper. 

“Where is he?” Wonho whispered harshly again. 

She pried his hand from her mouth, whispering back loudly. “How am I supposed to say anything with your hand on my mouth?” 

Na bi felt a sting and the blood trickle down her neck. She had encountered this man so many times but this was the first time he was hurting her. Frankly, it sort of annoyed her, making her snap in retaliation. “How would I know where Changkyun is?” 

Wonho’s grip on her softened and she took the opportunity to set herself free and face him. He looked tensed. 

“How do you know his name?” 

Na bi held a piece of gauze against the burning cut on her throat. Fuck.

“.....he told me.” 

“He told you?” Wonho looked at her in absolute disbelief but eventually shook it off like he had other more important things to deal with. He pointed his knife at her. “I don't care why he decided to disclose it to someone like you, but don’t you ever dare take his name. Not before me, not before anyone, do you understand?”

Na bi nodded slowly. She had forgotten the dangerous weight his name carried. Was that how comfortable she had gotten with all this?

“And I’m asking you for the last time. Where is I.M?” 

Ignoring how silly the name 'I.M' sounded, Na bi sighed. “I swear, I have no idea; I was drunk remember?” 

“He dropped you home.” 

“He was wearing a suit.”  

“What?”  

“Are we not playing state-the-obvious?”  

Wonho’s confused face turned into exasperation. “He didn’t return after that; you were the last one who saw him!” 

Na bi scoffed. “What, you think I tied him up and put him in my basement?” 

“Of course not. I already checked your house-“ 

“Wait, what-“ 

“I don’t think you are really understanding the gravity of the situation Ms. Baek.” Wonho moved closer to her, urgently. “He is a very important man and things can go very wrong without him around.” 

Why was everyone around her suddenly going missing? 

“I swear to god, I have no idea. Last night we….. I mean, I fell asleep and he left, I don’t know where he went after that or what might have happened-“  

“Na bi!” Both her and Wonho jumped apart, turning at the sound of Seokmin knocking the door. “The cops are here.” 

Wonho placed a finger on his mouth warning her, as though Na bi didn’t know she had to keep quiet. Fishing something out of his pocket, he handed it to her as he took a step back into the darkness of the room – her phone. Recalling what she had done with it last night, she wanted to ask Wonho if the person she shot was okay but when she looked up, he had already melted into the shadows he came from. 

Adjusting her scrubs, still looking over her shoulder, she walked over and opened the door to see Seokmin waiting for her and next to him, in uniform, was her next problem for today who also happened to be a very, very familiar face. 

“Na bi, this is Officer Kim Mingyu.”  

Seokmin introduced her to a man who didn’t really need an introduction because if she hadn't left him without an explanation last night, she would have been introduced to him anyways.

He seemed to have recognised her too, his eyes widening, expression changing from confusion to surprise.  

“Officer Kim, this is Dr. Baek, she was the one in charge today.” 

“Dr. Baek Na bi.” Mingyu pieced together her name, shaking her hand with a slightly cocky smile dancing on his face. “Fate works in funny ways.” 

As Seokmin frowned looking back and forth between the two of them, Na bi turned to him. “Min-ah, help me go check if everything is okay in the wards, please?” When he didn’t move, still suspiciously staring them down, she emphasised on the please once more, with a look of promise in her eyes to tell him the details later and he finally left, leaving them alone. When Na bi turned her attention back to Mingyu, he still hadn’t let her hand go and his eyes were on her lips, making her cheeks flush red.  

“I’m so sorry about last night-” Na bi began when he extended his other hand towards her, making her reflexively take a step back. “Woah.”  

He immediately looked apologetic, pointing at her neck. "You're bleeding."

"Oh, that's nothing." She pressed the gauze onto her wound again, pulling her hand out of his grip. "Again about last night, I'm sorry. It was rude of me, I should have said something before I left like that….” 

“The way you ran out, I was worried if everything was okay with you.” And he genuinely looked concerned. Sweet. 

“Everything was fine, I just had something personal to take care of.” 

He nodded slowly pursing his lips, and two tiny dimples appeared on his cheeks, making Na bi smile.

“I’m glad I found you again.” He put his hands his pockets, his shoulders scrunching up. “Now I just need to meet you one more time to confirm my theory.”  

“Your theory?” 

Mingyu nodded. “I believe a first meeting happens by chance. The second one may be a coincidence, but a third time?” He looked around before whispering. “That’s fate.”  

Na bi chuckled. “I don’t believe in fate officer.”  

“Give it a chance doctor. Third time’s a charm.”  

“And why do you think we will run into each other once again?”  

“Because I would like to take you out for dinner tomorrow.”  

Na bi crossed her arms, trying hard not to smile. “Setting up a third meeting? Well that’s cheating.”  

“I don’t just leave things to fate Dr. Baek.” He leaned in so close, Na bi could smell that familiar scent of him, the same one he had on in the bar, the memory of his mouth on hers coming back. “I work for what I want.” 

It would be a lie to say Na bi was not impressed. Usually, these kind of words didn't have much effect on her, she would have just laughed it off. But the first time she met him, she had judged him to be a lot more amateur and inexperienced and now clearly, he knew what he was doing and he was doing well. So, when he put his hand out looking pointedly at her phone, she gave it to him and watched as he gave himself a call and saved her contact on his phone with the emoticon of a butterfly.  

She laughed. “My 8th grade boyfriend used to save my name like that.”  

“I like butterflies.” He looked at her with captivated eyes. “I think they’re really beautiful.”   

Their wings might be but what about the ugly creature they hide under all that colour? 

Na bi took back her phone, saving his number with an emoji of her own – a dog.  

Mingyu pouted, dimples popping up again and she laughed, pointing at him, “There you go! I knew you were the golden retriever kind- “ 

“Na bi!” She startled, turning towards the sound as Seokmin ran up to her, bending over and coughing to catch his breath before he finally found his voice. “They’re…they’re all gone.” 

“What?” Na bi and Mingyu blurted together, shocked. 

“The ones in the ward, ICU, the ones detained, all, every single one of them is missing.” 

Na bi immediately ran towards the wards, both men following her. There were dozens of officers everywhere, talking to the staff, taking notes, walkie talkies going off but the beds – they were empty. All of them.  

They checked everywhere, they checked everything but there were no traces of Changkyun’s men.  

It was like they were never there. 

Na bi opened the door of her house, kicking off her shoes, tired to the bone.  

After hours of questioning by the cops, Na bi began to understand the meticulousness with which Changkyun’s men worked.  

While the hospital had called the police immediately after the ambulances arrived, it turned out they received no such call – Changkyun’s men had somehow intercepted it. It was only hours later when Seokmin called again to check on the delay that the cops received the information, arriving within 20 minutes with a full task force but their culprits had already cleared the scene by then. They didn’t even leave any clues behind – all their belongings had disappeared with them; the security cam footage was wiped clean, any and all records made for medical reasons were shredded – they had even taken their medical waste away. No one stopped them through all this – no one dared to.  

Na bi threw her bag on the couch, grabbing a bottle of water from the fridge. But just as she hurriedly chugged it, there was an unexpected knock on her door, prompting her to glance at the clock – it was 11pm. Who would come by now?  

Had Changkyun’s enemies finally found her?

Na bi felt a chill run down her spine. As though she bad timing was the highlight of her fate, just today of all days, none of Changkyun’s men were around. She was all alone, there really was no one to help.

When another knock followed, she immediately grabbed her phone and texted Seokmin, asking him to come over immediately, then scoured through the kitchen drawers and grabbed a knife. Heart thumping in her chest, she slowly made her way to the door, first looking through the peephole to see just how many people were threatening to break down her door but there was only one. Just one man in a spotless white shirt, standing with his head down and palms on the door and without even looking at his face, Na bi knew who it was. 

Sighing in relief, she threw the knife onto the dining table and quickly opened the door, as he lazily lifted his head giving her a small, familiar smile. 

“Changkyun?”  

He seemed like he was struggling to stand straight. Was he drunk?  

“You’ve been gone for hours. Do you always work this late…..”  

As his eyes trailed down her face, his smile vanished, hand slowly reaching for her neck, his finger smearing with blood as he ran it across a painful spot – the wound from Wonho’s knife seemed to have opened up again. 

“You’re bleeding.” He rubbed the blood between his fingers, looking at it. “What happened?” 

Was he slurring? 

"Wonho came to the hospital and-"

Before she could finish, his heavy eyes fluttered shut and he stumbled forward but Na bi quickly caught him, just as his knees gave away. She could feel something warm and sticky on his back making her look over his shoulder at her hand, a sight that nearly made her heart stop. Blood.  

For the first time ever, her hands shook as they were drenched in blood, his blood and as though he finally gave up, Changkyun went limp in her arms. 

Next chapter

[jeonstellate]

love is: a favor

yoo kihyun loathed every fiber of your being; but perhaps, just like everything else, even his own feelings weren’t as they seem.

✇༄ yoo kihyun x afab!reader

✇༄ mafia!au, arranged marriage!au, secret baby!au — angst(?)

✇༄ paragraph format — 2.7K words

masterlist | love is · · · masterlist | a journey

[gif’s full credit belongs solely to its owner]

chapter eight: a life after you

Yoo Kihyun was sure he would be the first one to tie the knot amongst MX’s core members. Rightfully so, too, because his relationship was the longest, most stable one — which was a feat only followed by Minhyuk’s.

Almost four years had already passed since he went down on one knee — and three since his betrothed betrayed his trust. He wouldn’t deny a lot had changed since then, especially in terms of himself and MX, albeit some still managed to stay the same.

Most of the changes that occurred were predictable, like Minhyuk’s engagement and eventual wedding. Even Changkyun’s and Jooheon’s respective breakups weren’t at all surprising, either, especially given the number of times the former and his significant other separated and the times the latter failed to retain his romantic ties.

The current status of MX’s relations with SVT wasn’t shocking, either, despite its much friendlier dynamic compared to three years ago. SVT had always been both MX’s enemy and ally after all, so it was normal that the scales of their relations leaned a little bit more towards the latter category nowadays.

However, what was highly unpredictable was how well MX and SVT would get along. Although it wasn’t the first time the two gangs cooperated, it was definitely the first time they got along really well — even up to the point that Shownu actually considered accepting S. Coups’ proposal for a permanent alliance.

Shownu first consulted the other six before he met with S. Coups again. He listened to all of their opinions, noted down all of their views, and addressed all their concerns to make a decision for MX’s best interest. Ultimately, the core members’ primary worry came down to permanently associating their name with the gang whose righthand stole Ryuki’s betrothed.

Albeit MX members separate their personal affairs from their business as much as they could, Shownu and the rest deemed it best for Ryuki to have the final say.

"MX has decided to accept your proposed alliance," MX’s leader spoke on behalf of his brothers.

Frankly, Ryuki didn’t expect his brothers to take the betrayal and the heartbreak he suffered through into consideration. Yes, his former betrothed had an affair with a SVT member, but that was a matter that concerned his personal life — not MX. And, as they all swore in the beginning, personal things mustn’t affect MX — especially if they could be helped.

Still, Ryuki appreciated their gesture tremendously — even if it wasn’t enough motivation to comfortably share the closure he got from his former beloved.

"So, who’s the chosen groom?"

The proposed alliance would unfortunately impact their personal lives, most especially of a particular member. Truthfully, the required marriage between a core member of MX and a SVT-affiliated person was almost a dealbreaker for them, but the promised benefits of having SVT’s assistance was too good to let go.

"Wonho has volunteered to be so."

chapter nine: a half-open secret

Kihyun had had almost three whole years to forget. He knew, right from the start, that his journey would be difficult — especially given that he had known his former betrothed for a decade. Still, by pure determination, assisted by MX’s workload, he managed to come a long way.

Unbeknownst to the rest of MX’s core, you — his former beloved — actually tried your best to leave him the best closure possible before you left his life indefinitely.

"Never blame yourself for what I did, okay?" You had said then. "Just blame me; blame everything on me. Then live your life, like you never met me."

At first, he thought nothing of your request. He was too overwhelmed by his suppressed emotions to see through your words, so he just took them quite literally. He didn’t blame himself, as you insisted, but he didn’t blame you, either. Instead, he just let his emotions manifest into hatred towards you.

It wasn’t until much later when he thought deeper about his last interaction with you. Upon actually thinking your words over one sleepless night, he became mystified by your apparent insistence that he should loathe you. However, by then, his negative feelings towards you had already been deeply rooted in his heart — so his new curiosity never really mattered.

That was, until SVT’s Labri hurriedly entrusted his niece to Ryuki and MX’s care.

Admittedly, MX’s and SVT’s relationship with one another had significantly improved over the years. Their business collaborations had become more frequent than ever, just as their celebratory dinners were.

During those shared nights, Ryuki tried his best to avoid being alone with Hoshi — after all, even if his mafia and personal lives were as separate as they could be, it was still hard to see the person who took his former love away. He couldn’t risk jeopardizing MX’s relationship with SVT by being aggressive in any form, so he opted to distance himself whenever possible. However, to make his avoidance to Hoshi more subtle, he also chose to build a wall between him and the rest of SVT. In that way, Hoshi wasn’t singled out — because he treated all of them almost the same way.

Ryuki’s course of action didn’t give him any chance to get close to any SVT members, unlike I.M who eventually befriended Player. Thus, he never expected to be specifically entrusted with SVT’s next generation.

And, yet, here he was: cradling Labri’s niece like she was his own.

And, to add onto the strangeness of it all, Labri’s niece just had to uncannily resemble him — with unmistakable hints of you, his former love, in her features.

He knew those three years apart were enough for him to disassociate you to the things and places you loved. Yet, as he found out after meeting Labri’s niece, those years weren’t enough to make him forget how you looked like. Not that his inability to completely forget you mattered, since no more positive feelings for you had remained within him. If anything, the child’s slight resemblance to you merely reminded him of the life you robbed him of.

If it was only Kihyun alone, he would’ve easily dismissed her resemblance to the both of you as a mere product of coincidence and imagination. However, (un)fortunately, his brothers were too wrapped around the little one’s finger.

"Why is Kian with you?" The most intriguing admirer, by far, was Hoseok — who mysteriously knew her name before anyone else did. Not even those who were present when Labri entrusted his niece knew her name because Labri had been in a rush, but, somehow, Hoseok did.

"How do you know her name?" Kihyun, upon hearing Changkyun’s confirmation of Labri’s niece’s name, couldn’t help but to feel suspicious.

Even more so when his brother merely replied "I’ve met her before" and didn’t offer anything else.

chapter ten: a life without me

Kian, as they found out her name was, was strangely particular on who she let carry her. Out of the seven MX core members, she only let Kihyun and Hoseok have the privilege. Albeit they have yet to see if Hyungwon would join the lucky ones after his sleep, the rest were blatantly denied with a shy smile.

Labri’s niece had no problem playing with anyone, though, so she was able to get close to everyone in no time. Still, despite the number of people who were more than willing to be the subject of her attention, she gravitated to Kihyun nevertheless. Thus, he ended up always being in her close proximity even as she played with the others.

MX members were understandably too curious about Kian’s parentage. Between Hoseok’s vague answers to their inquiries and Kian’s stark resemblance to Kihyun, the others deemed it appropriate to share their respective suspicions to one another. Ultimately, they all seemed to think that Kian had got to be related to Kihyun somehow.

Unsurprisingly, Hoseok didn’t give any input on the theory the rest seemed to agree on. They figured he most likely couldn’t be bothered — partly because he had Kian’s undivided attention and he had no problem reciprocating it so.

Of course, that was until he said something that suggested otherwise.

"Kian, let’s go wake up your godfather." He scooped her up from the floor, without sparing anyone a glance. "We wouldn’t want him to miss all the fun."

Hoseok’s words might’ve been simple, but they weren’t without any hidden meaning — prompting the remaining MX to immediately confer amongst themselves once Hoseok and Kian were out of earshot. After all, he just dropped the most crucial hint for confirming their theory.

Quite literally, it was a recall to a night they had dismissed long ago.

"I asked . . . [first name] . . . to make me the kid’s godfather . . . in exchange for keeping quiet until . . . they’re untraceable," Hyungwon had admitted one night, with alcohol slurring his words together and slowing the pace of his sentences. "That way, if something happened to them . . . I may have a chance to . . . protect the kid."

Albeit the mention of Kihyun’s child with his ex was never confirmed with sober lips, the evidences Kian personified were too much of a coincidence to be doubted without counter proof. Especially since MX kept on finding more reasons to believe that Labri’s niece was, indeed, related to Kihyun.

"The paper that had Kian’s name on it . . . it addressed her as Yoo Kian."

chapter eleven: a reversed secret

The last supporting evidence Kihyun was willing to take was the familiar doll Kian couldn’t sleep without: the very same hamster doll you took when you left. Although it wasn’t specially custom-made in any way, Kihyun personally had enough ignoring coincidences.

Kihyun didn’t voice out his own — more solidified — conclusion, partly because he found it difficult to utter. Somehow, saying it out loud felt equivalent to making his conclusion a reality — and, frankly, he wasn’t sure if he wanted it to be.

"You’ve figured it out, right?" Except neither Hyungwon nor Hoseok wanted him let it be.

The duo was obviously unapologetic in their decision to keep their knowledge out of reach to the rest. When confronted about their respective — selfish — choice, they left no room for arguments in their justifications and forcefully steered the discussion to the topic that mattered the most.

"What will you do now, then?"

When the doorbell rung and signaled Labri’s arrival to the MX house, Kihyun nonverbally answered Hoseok’s question.

By handing Kian to her uncle, bidding her a simple farewell, and nothing else.

Kihyun wasn’t denying reality: no one knew how SVT was really related to Kian, so he knew it was best not to make any rush decisions. After all, there was a chance she was more than just Labri’s niece from a friend — which was his your connection to SVT, as far as they were aware — especially if she was allowed to enter SVT’s base like she belonged there. As much as he wanted to keep her with him, he didn’t want to jeopardize MX’s alliance with SVT by forcefully taking what was theirs by circumstance.

Truthfully, he wouldn’t be able to answer if anyone asked how he felt upon knowing the truth behind the betrayal that changed the trajectory of his personal life. He had been harboring his resentment towards you for years now, so the revelation of the truth didn’t change anything within him. If anything, it merely made his hatred for you to spread even more. After all, it was one thing to be cheated on and another to be hidden a child from — albeit both spark intense levels of unfathomable heartbreak.

What Kihyun did know, however, was the fact that he wanted to ask you questions with answers only you could give — regardless of his strong preference to never see you again.

chapter twelve: a broken should’ve been

Kihyun firmly told MX to separate the complex issue surrounding Kian’s existence from their alliance with SVT. And true to his wishes, MX’s relationship with SVT wasn’t affected in any way. MX still carried out other successful business collaborations with SVT and Wonho’s engagement dinner still creeped close. As far as they know, SVT had no idea they — as a group — now know the truth about your betrayal and Kian’s parentage.

Even during Wonho’s engagement dinner, where MX’s and the rest of SVT’s cores were set to finally be introduced to his betrothed, MX didn’t utter a word about Kian. To their credit, Gorae almost did — especially after catching a glimpse of S. Coups’ lockscreen wallpaper with her on it, but Shownu was able to stop him just in time.

"Can we get a clue about Wonho’s betrothed?" Honey asked suddenly, covering his members’ peculiarity by stealing SVT’s attention away.

S. Coups, understanding that the other nineteen people were dying to know who he picked for the alliance, obliged — none the wiser about the real reason Honey asked. Not that any of them had to feign an interest, since SVT’s leader knew exactly how to hook them in.

"They’re family to me — and to SVT, too, by extension," S. Coups started. "Unfortunately, even if they’re family, a favor must be paid no matter what."

"Surely, you don’t mean—" Moon suddenly wore a dark expression — as did the rest of SVT. Ryuki couldn’t tell for certain, but he swore he could identify disbelief and betrayal amongst the simultaneous emotions they had donned.

Contrast to his members, however, S. Coups was void of any emotion that reflect theirs. "I do."

The deafening silence that suddenly engulfed MX’s fellow mafia gang was enough to let Player to be heard, despite his whisper-volume and deep voice. "Isn’t your way of collecting a favor a little too contradictory?

"They asked you to get them out of the mafia world and, in return, you want them to marry into a mafia?"

S. Coups agreed without any hesitation. "They should’ve known not to make a deal with a devil."

If Ryuki was asked if he had any guesses based on S. Coups’ hint alone, he wouldn’t be able to provide any. However, if Player’s reaction was also taken into account, especially with H. One’s drunk confession in mind, one person immediately popped up. Especially when S. Coups took the liberty to fill MX in, as an attempt to explain why his members reacted like so.

According to SVT’s leader, Wonho’s betrothed was formerly engaged to the love of their life, who also happened to be a member of a mafia. Frightened with the implications of carrying a child of a mafia member, they decided to run and cut ties. Unable to change their mind after a number of attempts, S. Coups ultimately helped them devise and carry out an escape plan, in exchange for the favor being returned later on.

Ryuki was intrigued by the eerie similarity of S. Coups’ story and H. One’s confession — as were the rest of MX, whose faces morphed from curiosity to realization the more the mafia leader went on. If their suspicions were correct, it meant that—

"You really are a devil, Choi Seungcheol."

—Wonho’s betrothed was you.

"Thank you for finally joining us, cuz," S. Coups gestured for you to take the only empty seat left on the table — which coincidentally happened to be across Ryuki. "What took you so long?"

"Kian didn’t want me to go, so I had to put her down for a nap first." You shrugged, not minding the intensified stares you got after mentioning Kian’s name.

Ryuki was internally cursing whoever made the only unoccupied chair to be right opposite him, because they were now solely responsible for the blatant awkwardness that surrounded their long table. Everyone, even those that sat on the opposite ends, could clearly see how he followed your every move with his eyes while you did everything not to meet his stare.

"Why didn’t you just bring her along?" Your cousin, fearless as ever, continued to converse with you — unaffected by the sudden change in the air.

Everyone watched as you easily threw a glare in his direction, puzzling them momentarily with your fearlessness that seemed on-par with the mafia leader. "Who am I marrying?" You uttered after you looked away from your cousin, deliberately choosing not to reply to his comment.

Funnily enough, the second those words left your lips was the same instant Ryuki confirmed that his three years worth of resentment was still very present in him.

"Kihyun," Wonho answered without hesitation.

Although, it seemed, his resentment wasn’t enough to be comfortable with witnessing you marry someone else.

"Me," Ryuki answered at the same time his brother did. "You’re marrying me."

[vanilladaises-rp]

Night Out

“a night out at the club is just what i need after a shitty week, care to join?”

“I suppose small dates like this are nice too” he teased “only if they’re with you though”

“what flavor do you want? no holding back this time, pick anything you want okay?”

tags🫶🏻: @clubwnderland @idontlikelizards @lunaaofthemoon @taetaemylovie @wiickedxgood @bunnybubchan @hugs4chan @lowblot @badbf-cb @luxora @urbtsboys @nana-n-nono @angelxdevil-bot @moonlightchn @monsterhigh-cb @domxbot @welcome-to-maniac @dia-oc @mooncremes @angelsxdemons-cb

[starguk-seoulstars]

Working on new muse page. I should have a few done within my lunch break. But here is a list of muses that I have, please feel free to ask about them if wanting to interact with them:

Hyunjin: Art student (Info up)

Agron: Illyrian General (FC: Bangchan) (Info up)

Greis: Illyrian Spy (FC: Hyunjin) (Info up)

Bardhyll: High Lord (FC: Johnny) (Info up)

Elros (FC: Felix) (info up)

Aeden (FC: Yeosang) (Info up)

Hades: God of the Underworld (FC: Mingi) (no pic, info up)

Hoseok/Wonho: Idol (no pic, info up)

Emilio Visco: Mob boss (FC: Changbin) (info up)

Owen Zanella: Mafia right hand (FC: Wooyoung) (info up)

Artemis: Assassin (FC: San) (info up)

Nyx: Assassin (FC: Seonghwa) (info up)

Ambrose: witch (FC: seoho) (info up)

Hanse: Florist

Han: Model

Hongjoong: warrior (deep back story) (info up)

Felix: Baker

Yunho: Comic book store owner

Seonghwa: Prince

Byungchan (wolf shifter): photography student

Fenrir (wolf shifter): FC- Bangchan

Changkyun (wolf shifter)

Minhyuk (wolf shifter): photographer

Seokjin version 1 (wolf shifter)

Seokjin version 2 (fashion designer)

Tyr (wolf shifter): FC- Yeosang

Kihyun: baker

Yongguk: Solo artist/ producer

Mark: Vampire

Jackson: Figure skater

Hermes (FC: Seongmin)

Leedo: dance instructor

[whiteteadreams]

i am on the brink of insanity. however, i have been writing. guys, this is insane.

-mafia jeongin

-wonho x gn!reader request

-mark roommate request

-jeno x milf!neighbor!reader

[adonis-koo]

sweet nothing • 7

↳ Description: being a guest at the Jeon Estate after a mishap of being kidnapped and dragged into your brothers affairs isn’t all that bad. Truth be told it brings you a lot closer to the mobster and owner of the estate Jeon Jungkook himself.

His two rules are simple, don’t cause trouble and don’t give him a hard time. Somehow you manage to constantly do both in the most endearing way despite being pregnant and waddling around most of the time.

Pairing: Jungkook/reader, ???/reader

↳ Genre: slice of life AU, mafia!AU, pregnancy, there’s like…a little bit of a plot but not a lot, future smut? maybe? it's very domestic!

Word Count: 2k

Previous | Next…

Note: IM ALIVEEE, barely, but my skin is clearing, my cortisol levels are lowering, nature is healing 🧘‍♀️ 🍃 I finally gave up and just decided that despite this story not being plot heavy, we’re still getting some plot anyways

“Are the meds not working?” You frowned, standing at the entryway of Jungkook’s bedroom, his laptop abandoned on the other side of the bed as if in defeat, he wasn’t asleep, just vacantly staring at the ceiling while laying down.

You felt an amused sense of pity for him, you don’t think you’ve ever seen him look so utterly miserable before.

“They are, just not fast enough.” He rasped out, not bothering to look at you as he sighed, closing his eyes, “I can't even focus on anything.”

You could feel your heart tug just the slightest for him, he really did look awful, “Well how about we watch a movie? It could take your mind off the pain.”

“I need to work.” He stressed the word as best he could despite his eyes still being shut.

“Okay well, as far as I can tell, you aren’t working.” You replied walking up to the bedside as he opened his eyes into an unappreciative glare.

You offered a somewhat apologetic smile, “C’mon it’ll make you feel better, you’ll have something to focus on.”

Grabbing the remote off his nightstand you left him little choice in the matter, he said nothing, eyes following you as you rounded the bed, huffing a little as you managed to get sat down next to him.

“Remind me why I put up with your antics?” Jungkook asked dryly.

You shrugged as you turned on the TV, “You tell me.”

Jungkook only stayed silent, even as you gave him a side glance, perhaps a little curious, after all, how could you not?

If he had an answer, he kept it to himself as you browsed through the streaming services before eventually settling on an action movie, the plot however was difficult to keep up with, Jungkook however funny enough seemed invested.

Half way through the movie you had given up, the sleepy lethargy you had been experiencing the last few days winning out as you began nodding off.

“Are you really sleeping through the climax?” Jungkook’s raspy voice made your eyes open.

“This was for you not me,” You complained, managing to grab the throw blanket that had been hanging off the end of his bed, curling up against the fuzzy material.

For a brief moment, a memory pulled a smile to your face, “Y’know….when I was little, Wonho used to make me soup- it was from a can but it was the thought that mattered, he’d always get me a fizzy soda from the corner store and we’d watch cartoons together. I remember falling asleep against him and then I’d wake up tucked in on the couch.”

Jungkook’s eyes stared at the TV but you could tell he was no longer focused on the movie, dare you say he seemed almost bothered by your words.

“What?”

He seemed to be debating something in his head, “You used to never go into detail…about your parents. Just that they weren’t around.”

You gave him a weak smile, you knew what he was asking. It rarely got brought up, but you did recall mentioning the few times he had tried to pry before, always shewing the question away with a ‘My parents were never around’.

You shrugged, “Would it be too simple to say that was the truth?”

Jungkook shifted a little to face you, “Was it that simple?”

There was no challenge in his tone, only a quiet raspy question, he was always good at hiding his intentions, shrouding it behind an unphased expression, but the more you had gotten to know Jungkook, the better you had become in the art of seeing the subtle shift in his gaze.

And right now he was nothing but curious, he always had been, but even moreso now.

Your hands had managed to hold the lower half of your stomach, otherwise you would’ve crossed them, eyes flickering away from him you gave a small shrug, “For me….”

You paused for a moment to gather your thoughts before you relented with a quiet sigh, “They were always off going to bars and clubs together, they were addicts. Wouldn’t come home for days at a time, and when they did they were never sober.” Your lips twisted into a frown, voice no louder then a whisper, “Then one day only my dad came home. Definitely not sober but he was crying, like hysterically sobbing, and he just collapsed in front of me and kept apologizing.”

“Grabbed me real tight around the shoulders and kept babbling incoherently, his mouth was all discolored and his skin was real clammy looking.” You rubbed your head, the memory leaving an icky feeling in your chest.

Jungkook looked pensive after a long moment of silence, it was as if he knew there was more, “And?”

“Apparently he overdosed on fentanyl on the living room floor,” You smiled bitterly, “In front of me…I don’t remember it though, can hardly recall the night anymore honestly. I was young, maybe eight or nine. Wonho was around thirteen at the time and he ended up intervening, he told me later that he found out my dad pimped out my mom to get enough money for the fentanyl, problem was that the dealer was apart of the Jang Hi mafia. I can’t even remember the last time I saw her before she disappeared, don’t know if she’s even alive anymore.”

“You never went to look?” Jungkook asked, a soft note could be detected in his voice.

You shook your head, “There was nothing to look for,” you couldn’t hide the sadness in your voice, your lips trembling a little, “She was never there to begin with…maybe that makes me a bad person, but I can’t imagine having a child and just…”

You couldn’t even think about it, your hands rubbing over the swollen skin of your stomach to try and calm your nerves.

“Out of all the people I’ve met- and trust me, I’ve met a lot,” Jungkook’s hand lifted, fixing your blanket back over your shoulder, “In comparison, you’re an angel.”

You stared at him for a long moment before you couldn’t help the smile that tugged on your lips, a smile of his own appearing, “You’re just saying that to make me feel better.”

“No, I'm saying it because it’s the truth.” Jungkook replied, it was quiet for a moment, his gaze dropping, “You’ll make a great mother.”

“You think?”

“I know,” He had a confident look about him that was difficult to not believe, “How do you feel about the delivery coming up?”

“I still have another twelve weeks to go Jungkook,” You tried to push the anxious feeling from your chest, “But I am nervous, I mean, I’ve never had a child before, don’t really know what to expect, other then I’ve heard it’s excruciating, which I guess is a given…”

You squinted a little, the movie long forgotten playing in the background, “I was terrified when I first found out I was pregnant, and the morning sickness was awful. I could hardly hold anything down the first few days, I was so sensitive to smells, any kind of strong scent gave me a raging headache…”

Jungkook’s lips parted and you could almost see it, hear it, the question of who the father was. But his lips immediately shut once more, as if perhaps sensing you would be unlikely to answer.

“I thought about it…” You admitted quietly, “Getting an abortion, but…” You shook your head, “I don’t know, I just couldn’t bring myself to do it. Any other woman in my shoes surely would. And even now, I wonder if I made the right decision, if I had known Wonho was going to disappear like this…” You sighed, “I don’t know, I guess some silly part of me, thought that maybe, this was meant to take me to a new path in life, one where I’d work hard and I’d be able to separate myself from this life. Was that too naive to think?”

“I think anyone who values their life would want that,” Jungkook concluded easily, “Someone who isn’t meant to be in this lifestyle, who’s honest, and still has a shred of dignity left.”

It was quiet for a moment before he continued, “You were always too good for the underground. Shame you got dragged into it.”

You shrugged, “I don’t really think about it much anymore, I mean, it is what it is.” You chewed on your bottom lip, “Maybe it would be better if I didn’t keep the baby. I’m sure any couple unable would kill for the chance to adopt.”

You had never seen Jungkook straighten the way he did on this moment and you couldn’t help but somewhat regret your words, not your thought on it, but the fact that you had voiced it aloud.

It wasn’t the first time you had thought about it either, it was stupid of you to think having this baby would do anything other than pull you into the underground further.

“What makes you say that?” Jungkook’s gaze was like steel, it made you shy away a little, almost feeling the same way when you had first met.

You couldn’t keep eye contact with him even if you wanted too, “A lot of reasons,” you confessed, nothing more then a whisper, “The fact that I’m a single mom for starters? Or the fact that my brother is in serious debt and I’m being held here as a makeshift safe house? Let’s not even begin to talk about being able to properly provide for a child. I never had present parents and I don’t have anyone to ask for help.”

You felt tears of frustration fill your eyes.

Jungkook parted his lips, but quickly shut them once more, you could tell he was battling a plethora of questions, which maybe he didn’t deserve an answer too, but you could tell it was beginning to slowly eat at him.

Instead Jungkook’s lip twitched as if in irritation at whatever he was thinking about, eventually vocalizing his thought, “Is the dad really that much of a deadbeat?”

He didn’t say it but you could see it on the tip of his tongue, ‘I never thought you’d go that low’

You didn’t say anything for a long moment, carefully thinking about how to reply, it wasn’t that you were purposely withholding information, it just simply brought back uncomfortable memories.

“Far from a deadbeat. Furthest thing possible,” you shuddered, “It did cross my mind,” You mumbled, “Finding him. Them. But…” you trailed off before shaking your head, “What good would that do me? He might want the baby but he isn’t gonna want me.”

You only glanced down at your stomach, hand rubbing around the swollen skin as you felt a flutter trill across, the baby once again kicking.

It briefly made you smile, your worries put at ease.

A hand suddenly reached out, grabbing your chin along with your attention.

You nearly jumped at Jungkook being nearly nose to nose with you, his lips parted and his eyes had so

many things they wanted to say, “You can always ask me for help.”

You hated the way you felt all of the old feelings you had once upon a time suppressed into nothing more than a blur of self-gaslit delusions.

But it was never delusions, it was never just all in your head.

“Can I?” Your voice wavered.

Jungkook stared at you for a long minute, his eyes dropping briefly to your lips before he eventually, almost reluctantly looked away, only letting out a small laugh.

Perhaps a tone of bitterness if you really listened close, possibly regret?

“We’re gonna have to replay entire last quarter of the movie,” Jungkook complained with a rasp, sinking into the bed frame and suddenly you remembered how easy it was to pretend like there was never anything there.

You cleared your throat, before giving him a weak smile, “I’ll get the remote.”

The past was the past anyways, you’d just have to figure things out one day at a time, just like you always have.