#xie lian's terrible cooking

[marrow-arts]

Yk he snarfed like half of that bowl of Xie Lian's cooking before it hit, too

Hua Cheng is surviving through the immunity of love

[adragonthatwrites]

From what I've observed Xie Lian's 'cooking style' mostly seems to consist of;

"Throw a bunch of shit into the thing, stick it on the heat, put the lid on, and hope it turns into something delicious after an hour or two."

And I realized that while he is terrible at cooking, he might not be half bad at baking.

[wwxwasright]

let him talk about his food!!!

[sunderwight]

love how the MXTX protagonists have gotten progressively worse at cooking over time

it's like

Shen Yuan: not terrible. his biggest struggle is that he wasn't really culinary before he transmigrated, and since transmigrating he has very little idea of how an ancient kitchen works, so any disasters can mostly be attributed to that. would be perfectly fine making simple dishes in a modern kitchen.

Wei Wuxian: a capable cook, except for when it comes to seasonings. absolutely loses his mind at that point. if you do not hide the chili oil ALL OF IT will be going into the pot. has no ability to moderate spice levels for the preferences of others.

Xie Lian: almost lethally bad. just terrible. completely allergic to following a recipe. only one other person can eat his cooking without suffering and that guy's already dead.

Prediction for Book 4 Protagonist: actively just serves people poison on purpose.

[darlingpwease]

𝐥𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐝𝐚𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠

𔓘 unhealthy behaviour (obsessiveness, possessiveness, clinginess, kidnapping, dependence), dommale elements, pet names ("gege"), dark au, mention of nesting & heat, mention of sex (heavy petting), mention of killing; reader x xie lian, omega!xie lian

ᥫ᭡ You didn't know how long you had been living in this small, cute house with Gege — and where you lived before you met your Gege, who loved white clothes, cooked poorly, smiled like the midday sun, never cried and was not at all the omega who could have anyone but you. Not only because he said that he didn't even have plans to have anyone other than you in his life, but because you saw that Gege wasn't looking for anyone, didn't hold his eyes on anyone; even if he was gentle to children and if he ever wanted to have a puppy, it was clearly that he wasn't going to get an alpha for this — you understood perfectly well why.

Although you haven't self-presented yet and weren't going to guess what your role in gender society would be, you understood that he would only be with you. That you will definitely grow up, get married and will have a lot of happy and married days.

You can't not. He's your Gege, after all.

ᥫ᭡ Your Gege smelled richly tender and a little like blood, a completely incongruous fragrance, — but you've never smelled anyone expect him for more than five minutes, so you didn't know how normal it was. Something in your head is throbbing with the obsessive thought that he smells wrong, he should smell wrong, he smelled completely different before, but you have nothing to oppose — you don't remember that his smell was different, but you know it.

According to Gege, you smelled like milk and his favorite food "even when he was like you," but you always brushed him off; even with your little socialization, you know that people can't smell like a 'specific food', and he only teases you without malice, as he loves to do, affectionately saying that you look 'like a little steamed bun' or peeking at what you're cooking, purring and squinting when you tell him to leave the kitchen.

You know that he can — is able — to cook well (after all, you somehow survived before you were old enough to cook yourself), but for some reason his food looks terrible all the time, and you can't name the reason, but can feel it in your heart. At least he can do physical work like fixing a house or a fence — and you want to say that you didn't decide to live with him just to be a servant, but you can't say this with certainty. You don't remember why you decided to live with Gege — it seems you've always lived with him.

Maybe you were with Gege from the very beginning?

ᥫ᭡ Your Gege is tall, flexible as a vine and his hair is so long that you could get tangled in it. His skin is soft and pleasant, even if his palms are slightly rough, and his pretty, scarlet lips, like cherry blossoms or drops of blood (maybe that's why he smells like blood?), look like a brushstroke that was left because of how adorable he looked on a beautiful, handsome face. Your Gege looked the way anyone would want to look, no matter if it's omega, beta or alpha. Your Gege has slender long legs, moderately broad shoulders, black peach eyes and a thin waist, and even if he gently teases that you will grow up to be even more rare magnificent, you know that the charm of your Gege makes even flowers be ashamed of their imperfections. If Gege wanted to, he could ascend and become the god of flowers — you are not sure if this is how it works, but if heaven did not give such beauty to someone great, then they are definitely blind. Your Gege laughs gently and says that 'Heaven has already given him the best gift', and if it were necessary, he would give everything, but not this "jewel", — and you understand who he means, but pretend that you don't. In the end, you know that you have no one but him, just as he has no one but you.

But he doesn't need to say it — even if he looks like a bunny, you know he's a cunning predator, like a weasel or a ferret. However, even in spite of his nature, you know that he cares about you, and probably cared even before you came, when you remember how you first saw your house — a memory from which your memory begins.

Everything around is like a perfectly modeled paradise for you — living in a comfortable, small house, with a beloved, gentle Gege, with trips to the city from time to time and the opportunity to do anything, since people don't go that far, while if you want to see more, then your Gege is always ready to get up and to follow you. It's like a flower garden in which you were the most luxurious and beloved, the only flower, while your Gege was a gardener who adored you to such an extent that he would do anything to make you bloom.

You want to tell Gege that he is the most charming for you, but he already knows it. After all, you haven't seen anyone for so long and often to tell if there is someone better. But something tells you that this is absolutely impossible — as if he was an absolute that others dare only look up to. If he called himself beauty number two, no one would be able to call themselves beauty number one. Gege says — with complete confidence, almost doom, with a sparkle in his matte black eyes, — that if he calls himself "handsome", then his face will burn with shame of brazen falsehood at the sight of you.

That is why, — he whispers, kissing the top of your head, as if cradling when you hide face in his chest, — the most beautiful things should be hidden.

You don't quite understand "why", but react to gentle purring, letting yourself be hidden in his clothes, smelling of him. even if the sleeping place is hard, Hege is soft and a little warm, and when you are in his hands, you feel as if the whole world is holding you, although he only gently purrs that you are his "whole world".

Just in case, you whisper that he is also your jewel and prettiest flower.

ᥫ᭡ Gege smells sticky, sweet, tender; his hair is wet and tangled, and even his scarlet lips look even brighter and more beautiful, as if soaked in blood, with a slight mist of blush on his cheeks, while his peach black eyes are like an abyss into which no one can help falling, seeing him so tender, so sensual, so... tempting. You can't — at least not now — be able to respond to courtship, not when the smell of milk is still subtly enveloping your body, but Gege doesn't mind at all, hoarsely whispering in the semi-darkness of the small, sweet house that everything is fine as long as you are around, don't go anywhere without him.

You will never you dare, of course, but when you bring him jugs of water, feeling the heat of his flexible soft body, you feel at home. His nest is elegant, not very full of soft things, but it "always has the most necessary" — you.

Even when his skin is so hot, like an oven, you feel so calm and good in his arms, burying your nose, as if hiding from the whole world. Gege's hands are gentle, with palms slightly roughened from frequent work, and you only purr that you have the best Gege in the world, your omega is the best, while he buries his nose in your hair, cooing inaudibly, pressing you to his flexible, wet body, but not at all to the "thirsty" or "in need of an alpha", as you have sometimes heard about omega leaks somewhere on the street — Gege is ruddy, bright-smelling, beautiful, but so homely and... ordinary, only becoming even more clingy and unwilling to leave the nest, and this is the only time when you do not go and leave offerings in front of a small temple for the "dear deity who guards this place."

You hope that the deity will not be too offended, looking at how your usually gentle and calm Gege whines that "you are too cruel" when you have to come out of his nest and bring water and light snacks, because you are an ordinary person and because everything inside the nest smells so much of him that you are afraid not to will he die of dehydration. You don't know how to handle omegas, but you are sure that "as long as Gege is good, everything is right". Gege only purrs that he only needs you to make him feel good when his long, elegant, eternally cold fingers cling to your clothes, looking at you with the gaze of a sad bunny, but your decision is unchanged.

You still bring some gifts to the deity, fearing that your Gege has messed up something again and you should at least remind from time to time that you are grateful to this deity and appreciate their protection.

And when you leave, you definitely feel better.

ᥫ᭡ The smell of Gege is thicker, richer, brighter, bloodily bright when blood flows from his elegant, white, long fingers — fortunately, not his, but even if it were his, you would take care of the wound and would stay on his chest before he wakes up.

You would a little like it to be his blood, because sometimes your Gege is so perfect that you want a little more human qualities from him,

especially when he gives you a gentle, adoring smile again, and his lips are even brighter than even the blood of the body lying on the rain-smelling, dark grass someone. This happens sometimes — even though you live in the forest, it only means that there are even more predators here. Gege gently purrs that you both should not go to the city for perhaps another month — who knows where else these creatures are hiding? it's not safe — and it's not that you're disappointed, having already bought everything you need... but you know that your Gege is doing it for you.

Every year there are more and more of them, like weeds in the garden, but Gege only gently tells you not to think about it, although you more than clearly see that the older you get and more often appears in cities and villages, the more of them. Gege sometimes allows you to go for things yourself to the nearest village, where not only passing merchants often stop, since the village is conveniently located with a road leading to the center, but also other rabble, and you can more than connect the point "they see me" and the point "they began to appear more often in our part of the forest." However, Gege, although omega, is not like ordinary omega at all — he always hides the bodies himself, although never comes back full or with meat, so you prefer to think that he feeds other beasts or does something else. You don't really want to know.

In the village, you heard about a case where omega endured violence from his spouse for a long time and eventually scratched out their eyes and chewed their throats, and whatever Gege did with the body, you just hope that it won't affect you. Of course, you do not commit violence against him, but your future spouse is not an "ordinary" omega, who can only endure until he explodes. Of course, you have never seen him explode, but you are sure that this will not be normal, and he will certainly commit one or two particularly serious crimes, which are whispered about from time to time in cities — you do not quite understand what it is, but you are sure that it will not be very good. Just in case, you regularly bring him flowers and cook food much better — Gege seems to think it's a little silly, but very cute, and hides head in your neck, purring that whoever you turn out to be, he will become your omega husband.

You are not self-presented in any way, although you no longer smell of milk and have definitely grown up, even matured rather, and Gege now puts his head on your chest, unlike how he hid you on his chest, like a parent hides his cub from danger. However, he continues to bring crowns of flowers and gently pulls your name, depending on how you take care of the household, still much better than him. Of course, he also contributes to your small household with a vegetable garden and a plan to build at least a chicken coop, but still prefers to spread out on the wooden hem, looking on how you work, and you can't blame him, seeing his happy face, like he's a pet that's been petted and is now resting.

(purrs plaintively when your hands slide over his chest, but you only coo him to relax when another flower appears on delicate neck, too contrasting with the color of his skin, just like the one that appears a little lower, then to the right, a small inflorescence on stomach, small bouquets on sides, scarlet spots on wet slippery trembling thighs, an ecstatic squeak when your lips descend lower, and his legs try to hide, but you only squeeze his knee tightly — and let him squirm while his legs wrap around your head, draining him even before the start to ease his desperate need and hunger.)

Perhaps you spoil omega too much, who has not even become your husband yet, but for some reason you always want to pamper him, as long as you remember yourself.

Perhaps you are just a good spouse from birth, huh?

cw blood, amnesia, poly relationship

ᥫ᭡ Red flowers always grow around little house. You often bring them to the deity, thanking for protection; the deity never responds, but you are still calmer and happier, as if the very knowledge that someone is guarding you inspires you — just like the sight of red flowers, almost as scarlet as the lips of Xie Lian, your mate, who picks up garbage, likes to dig in the garden and builds a chicken coop where you can then put the chicks, and also repairs the fence and the house, purring that he should prepare if you turn out to be a non-beta. You don't think that you will turn out to be a non-beta, but don't say anything, gently rubbing Xie Lian's back and not resisting when he offers to massage your, enveloping you with a gentle, slightly mettalic scent that has already become your favorite and so native that you can't imagine that there was a more attractive fragrance in the world.

The stranger in red smells of sweet datura — a fragrance that is so rich and bright that it could be used for demonic dual cultivation, but it envelops you so naturally, as if it is focused only on you. He has shiny black eyes, as if absorbing any sunlight that gets into them, and a carelessly woven black braid with a thin scarlet ribbon, the look of which is too familiar, but you don't understand why — and you haven't been so stupid and naive for a long time to say things like "I probably saw it somewhere on the market", because the way it is cut and decorated is too reminiscent of your way. His skin is white, too white for a person in any state of health except death, but his lips are peach-colored, curved in a mischievous smile with a hint of tenderness.

You don't see the point in asking if you know each other when the cheekily sweet fragrance becomes brighter at his playful approach, although you see how his body trembles slightly.

San Lang. My name, — if Xie Lian's smile is like the sun, then he rather resembles the devil, with this gentle youthful aura and the sparkles of the imp in his eyes, — but I'm much more interested in yours.

And before you have time to answer, he continues, trembling slightly, with pent-up delight, looking at you as a deity, although a devilish smile does not leave his thin, gently peach lips:

Let me guess, though.

Xie Lian, your sweet, gentle omega, has always told you that no one but him knows about you, — jewelry should be kept from others, — but in San Lang's eyes, a veil of pure adoration shimmers like black pearls in the light, especially when he tilts his head, and the familiar-looking earring gently follows this movement, caressing unnaturally white skin, like a drop of blood — the same as Xie Lian's bright scarlet lips.

I'm sorry; did I scare you? I just live in the city, — the son of a merchant family, — so I often saw you. Don't you remember me? You often come to our store.

Do you?

We could take a walk before my family starts looking for me, right? After all, I don't bite, so you have nothing to be afraid of, right?

Despite all the playfulness, you hear nervousness, and you can't find the strength to refuse, knowing that Xie Lian knows about your possible long absence and is probably busy outside the house right now. Maybe you just inhaled too much of its smell, leaving a taste in your mouth, and maybe it just seems to you when you feel the familiar bloody notes of fragrance through the sweet dope. Maybe it just seems to you that omega is too passionate about you and trusting even for someone who left the city for the first time and ended up in the forest, and is too playful, even if unmarried and not marked by anyone. You're not sure how normal it is when an omega tries so desperately to snuggle up and purrs something, more just keeping up a conversation than trying to develop it, enjoying your company the way a fish inhales oxygen in water after a long stay on land.

You're not stupid, though. Perhaps you are not very experienced, but you are not stupid, especially when he looks at you as a deity, and his gaze is too reminiscent of Xie Lian's gaze when he thinks that you do not see, not taking his unblinking eyes off you, as if afraid that if he does not see you and you do not give voice then you will disappear, go away like the morning mist.

And the fact that Xie Lian does not grow up; and the fact that you do not remember anything before coming to your "home"; and how you and he bring offerings to an unknown deity; and how white San Lang's skin is, but his gaze burns harder than a burnt hand that you have never burned in your memories.

The small child who fell from the wall; royal colors, like a kaleidoscope, with a sunny smile and a sword made of peach wood; clothes so bright that it's almost uncomfortable, but as long as he's around, everything is fine. Two faces, like a blurred image in a puddle. You don't remember anything before you were brought in and told that he's your family now, and you're not sure you want to know. Maybe there are things you don't need to know.

A small child. Red eye. Blood. A lot of blood.

The little lump on your chest, not understanding what's wrong with you, but trying to do everything.

When blood flows from your body, it doesn't hurt that much.

San Lang's lips taste like ripe cherries.

I don't think Xie Lian will mind.

You think that the omega story may have been more true and probable than you thought.

Perhaps you should find more flowers.

Oh, are you picking flowers for him again? Can I help?

For some reason, now you understand where the bodies went, who defended territory and why scarlet flowers bloomed around everything.

I don't know what you're talking about, my darling.

[dumbkatsu]

Hi! Could you please do hualian (together or separate) with a mortal s/o who has reincarnated? Thank you!!! (I don't normally do request like this so I'm kinda nervous)

Hey anon! I'm so sorry I'm only responding to you now. Thank you so much for waiting! I really like this prompt so I'll try my best. Hope you like it!

(I'll do a mix of both here. from personal pov to hc of them together)

I was listening to this playlist video on yt while writing

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When Xie Lian saw you he couldn't believe it. He thought it was just some spirit messing with him. But no it was you. It was you.

Time stood still while flashbacks of memories and feelings you shared styarted flooding back in. From the joyous times where everything seemed right to the unbearable grief, rage and sorrow from your loss. By the time he'd recovered you had already disappeared into the crowd.

He wandered around for a while until he heard the voice of his beloved in the comunication array. "Dianxia where are you? Did you forget about our date in Yu Jun mountain for our 50th anniversary. I'm counting on your wonderfull cooking." "Ah yes San Lang I'm on my way!"

Xie Lian arrived and Hua Cheng was quick to greet him with a peck on the lips. A cheeky gesture that held an insurmountable of love. "Gege everything's ready and this tine I'll make sure we won't have any interruptions" "Hmm" Xie Lian was looking at the horizon deep in thought. "Gege are you alright? You seem distant. What happened today?"

"I saw them" xie lian blurted

"Who?" San Lang inquired

"Y/N san lang."

"..."

" I-I couldn't believe it myself either but- "

"No."

"What?"

"No, that's impossible they're dead" Hua chengs face was deadpanned. Showing no emotion "San Lang it's true I saw them today at the market"

"No gege they're dead I saw them die"

It was brutal and ice-cold. Xie Lian knew this was a touchy subject but he pressed on. "I think they've finally reincarnated" "..." "It's been so long since I've seen their face...seen those eyes-" "Dianxia I'm very sorry but it seems there is trouble in ghost city and it requires my presence. I'm terribly sorry but I must go. I'll meet you in puqi shrine." with that hua cheng disappeared. Xie Lian knew Hua cheng didn't need to go to ghost city, yin yu could basically manage ghost city without hua cheng for a year in the least. He'd seen it. Alas xie lian sighed and he knew hua cheng just needed space.

Hua Cheng didn't even try to find you. With his network already so spread out (yin yu) it was too easy to find out where you were.

You were there. Rigth there.

You were working in a lantern shop. Helping the owner preparing for the grand festival that celebrated the two deities of the village. Hua Cheng could only watch. Fighting the urge to come to you and hold you. To make sure you were real. It took too much of him when he lost you right in his arms. He wanted to protect you. So much so that you'd never leave like that ever again.

But he couldn't. He didn't move and just stared at you until the shop closed.

The walk back to puqi shrine felt longer than usual. With all his turmoil at least he knew with certainty that he could always find comfort in his beloved's arms. Xie Lian swallowed him in a hug as soon as Hua cheng laid down. "So how were they?" "Still has that same selflessness... they were helping the old Tao with the lanterns for tomorrow " "Do you want to meet them?" "I don't know" "I don't know either. To be honest I'm scared." hua cheng turned cupping xie lian's face "It will be alright. We've been through worse."

The day of the festival was hectic. You were filling in for old Tao's nephew that broke his leg two days before the festival and the customers were flooding the humble stall, the craftsmanship and ability of old Tao that translated to his lanterns was indeed mesmerizing. After things slowed down old Tao gave you time off to enjoy the rest of the festival. You went straight to the food stalls and grabbed some "chastity meatballs" you always found the name a bit odd but the tale was that the Scrap‌ ‌Immortal saved a family by offering the ghosts those meatballs and went to a quiet table to enjoy your treat.

After the meal, you got up but tripped on your robes and bumped into a man and spilled some liquor on them. They made quite a fuss and were very angry. As they prepared to strike you, you closed your eyes and prepared for impact. But it never came.

A strong hand pale as chalk was holding tightly onto the wrist of the man. A youth that had such a delicate physique was looking at the man like he was about to kill him.

"Is there a problem here?" Hua cheng inquired.

The look from his threatening gaze was enough to send the man running. As he was out of sight Hua cheng swiftly turned away and started walking. Until he felt a gentle tug on his sleeve "Hey gongzi wait up! I never got the chance to thank you. Can I offer you a meal to repay your act of bravery and kindness?"

The young man turned to you with a face of disgust. But his eyes were of melancholy and hurt.

"Hong'er?"

Hua Cheng breathed in sharply and held his breath. His pupils slightly shrunk. "Ah, I'm sorry I don't know why I called you by that name, forgive me. You do look quite familiar..."

The resurgence of memories foreign to you started flooding back into your mind at a rapid speed. The fog started clouding your mind and you started to lose your balance. But before you could fall you were enveloped by soft white fabric.

"San Lang let´s get them somewhere safe"

That was the last thing you heard before falling into slumber.

Alright! Time for some hc!

Ok so while you were sleeping you regained your memories of them. You saw everything happen before your eyes. How you met Xie Lian and Hong'er when the kingdom of Xianle was vast and prosperous. The memories you made with them. How you died in honger's arms in the war. Everything.

You woke up in a staw mat. The two faces you thought you'd never see again now are looking at you with worry.

Your eyes started to swell up with tears and pulled them both into your embrace while softly crying.

Xie lian closed his eyes and embraced you with so much strength to compensate for all the years filled with regrets and let out a deep sigh.

Hua cheng on the other hand hugged you reluctantly and buried his face on your shoulder, biting his trembling lip to keep himself under control.

He was the first to break the embrace and booked it into the woods. With you following behind for a while.

He stopped at a lake and turned to you.

"I'm sorry"

"For what?"

"For leaving you"

You got closer to hua cheng and just held him there.

"It's ok. I'm here now"

You both stayed there for a while. Sitting in front of the lake embracing each other. Hua cheng with his head on your chest and you carding your fingers through his hair. Xie Lian Joined you shortly.

Now! Obviously they put you up to speed on all the events that happened. And you were incredulous at the adventures and plots they uncovered. But you were glad everything turned out in the end.

Surprisingly, an activity you guys like to do together is fishing

Even though you and hua cheng had to "fish" xie lian out of the sea most of the times.

You help xie lian in collecting trash so you can sell it.

Dude. When I tell you sleeping with them is THE BEST THING

Take that info as you wish 😏

They would introduce you to their friends. Even yushi huang!

Becoming buddies with shi qingxuan was bound to happen.

Thankfully mnq although at the beginning skeptical, accepted you more then hua cheng for xie lian.

Travelling with them to other lands is so enjoyable.

Hua cheng likes to spook you with sneaky kisses on your neck

Giving gifts to each other bcs something reminded you of them is very frequent.

One day after xie lian came from working in the rice fields you were preparing dinner and he sneaked up behind you, covering your eyes "Now who from my two lovely husbands might this be?" you said playfully.

Xie lian's heart skipped a beat.

"It's me dear" he said pecking your cheek lovingly.

He then took your hand stroking it lovingly and and sliding a grass ring in your finger.

"I did that with a couple of grass I found. I know it's nothing compared to san lang's elaborate rings but-" he was interrupted with your kiss.

"I love it A-lian"

[scaredpigeons]

So I’m making a late dinner, and I shredded up some potatoes to cook in a pan so I can slap some fried eggs overtop and call it a meal. But because I didn’t skin them, and didn’t wring the moisture from them, they turned a little (a lot) grey and sad looking.

And I was like “wow, these look terrible.”

And then immediately after I went

“Xie Lian would think they’re lovely, and in turn, so would Hua Cheng.”

And now I feel better

[user-needs-new-hyperfixation]

something that's been tickling my brain for the last couple of days and kind of bugging me is that seemingly from the extras (Xie Lian being powerless against the amnesia monster etc), breaking his cultivation really DID sap Xie Lian's power.

Like. Okay. So Xie Lian spends the bulk of the story with his power shackled, reliant on borrowing it from other people when he needs it. And then there's this huge pivotal moment when he is freed from those shackles by Hua Cheng's sacrifice, freed by love to be empowered and fight his own battle, etc etc it's very beautiful. And then Hua Cheng comes back and they get married and the consummation of that same love that freed him strips him of his power and puts him right back to having to borrow it?!?! (albeit sexily😆) As much as I love this story, I'm having a hard time being satisfied by that.

My instinct is to want something like this: We know that in this universe the beliefs of the worshipers have at least some impact on the gods they worship. Xie Lian hasn't had worshipers besides Hua Cheng in centuries. And the new followers he's slowly gaining worship him as he is, not as he once was. They're barely aware of him as a prince, or of Xianle at all. They don't know or care what his cultivation path was. They just know that he was with them in Banyue Pass and Mount Yujun and so on; that he faced the serpents fearlessly and that he fought off the ghost brides and that he is kind and compassionate and brave and also clumsy and a terrible cook. They know him helping in the fields outside Puqi Shrine with a handsome lad in tow. And so when he breaks his vows to seal new ones, Xie Lian expects to lose his power. But when he reaches tentatively for it afterwards, he finds it all still there. Because no one needs him to be a virgin anymore. No one needs him to be free from anger or competitiveness or sorrow or love. No one needs him to push aside every human impulse and desire and emotion. The worship of those who love him -- and most especially of the One who loves him most -- frees him to be the god he is, and to have power as he is.

Anyway. This isn't necessarily a critique so much as a question...am I missing something? Because I very much like MXTX's writing and it's generally very intentional so that's entirely possible. Is the way I would like just too obvious? Too happy an ending with no downsides? Is there some narrative theme I'm not quite grasping? I would love to hear (kindly voiced 😅) opinions!

[friedwizardwhispers]

Look, it's Xie Lian's inner troll coming out, I love him. This is the guy who will prank you with his terrible cooking.

Also they are just mean, so go off Xie Lian.

[el-writes-things]

the state of you

the biggest struggles of writing this were choosing a name for the fic and for xie lian's demonic dish from the pits of hell LMAO

super scuffed hualian sick fic based on this post by @draweltz :) i legit speedran writing this in like three days and didn't edit so please forgive me if it's like. exactly as terrible as i expect it to be HAHA

i'm also notoriously terrible at writing proper endings so i apologize for that as well

u can read the fic here (under the cut) or on ao3

likes n rbs are super appreciated :)

Given the noises and scents emitting from the kitchen of their apartment, Xie Lian’s cooking wasn’t going… conventionally well. 

Hua Cheng didn’t mind in the slightest, though, humming to himself softly as he twirled his chopsticks expertly around his long fingers. He’d offered his help already, as usual, and Xie Lian had declined, wanting to surprise him with some kind of odd, inventive meal, as usual. 

He enjoyed being able to help Xie Lian in every way, but he didn’t argue too much about the cooking matter. Xie Lian was the first and only person who deigned to cook for him, and he seemed to take pleasure in preparing meals, so who was Hua Cheng to argue? 

Tapping his chopsticks against the wood of their low-set dinner table gently, Hua Cheng tried to contemplate what Xie Lian had made today. It was an impossible endeavor based on smell alone, but he tried regardless, calling out guesses to amuse his husband. 

“Is it… stew?”

“Nope,” Xie Lian called back over the sound of sizzles. 

Hua Cheng considered the noises. “Is it… meat?”

“Wrong!”

“Really? Then, is it-”

A light laugh from the kitchen instantly warmed Hua Cheng’s heart. “Stop guessing, San Lang! Let me surprise you for once.”

“Oh, I’m always surprised by your cooking,” Hua Cheng replied sincerely, earning him another laugh. 

“I’m almost done, okay? Just wait another minute or two,” Xie Lian told him. 

Instantly, Hua Cheng rose from his seat on the floor. “Does gege want help carrying plates to the table?”

“I’m alright!” Xie Lian chirped. A series of sharp clatters met Hua Cheng’s ears and he winced, concerned. “Okay, close your eyes.”

Hua Cheng obeyed, covering his good eye with one hand. Soft footsteps announced the arrival of the martial god, followed by the sound of two plates being set down gracefully on the table in front of him. 

“You can open your eyes now,” Xie Lian told him, and he moved his hand away.

The dish was, simply put, a monstrosity. Purple and pink bubbles popped at the surface of a thick, strange substance speckled with starbursts of orange and yellow. Equally horrible was the smell, pungent and awful. Hua Cheng looked up at his husband, seated to his left, with a grin. 

“What is it called?”

“I call it ‘Dreams of Summer Nights Passed’,” Xie Lian replied. 

Hua Cheng nodded affirmatively, picking up a spoon and stirring it through the plate. Beneath the pink and purple substance was a densely packed white… rock?

“And what’s in it?” Hua Cheng chipped away at the rock for a bite. He brought it up to his lips with a playful smile. 

“It’s rice and strawberry curry. I put carrots and corn in it, too. Look, Ruoye helped me cut the carrots into neat pieces!��� 

Hua Cheng placed the bite in his mouth, chewing slowly. He scraped away at the rice-rock for another bite, mixing it with the curry again. 

“It’s good,” he said when he’d finished chewing. “I like it. It’s one of your best.”

Xie Lian beamed at him and pulled his own plate closer to himself. “I’m glad you like my cooking, San Lang,” he told the Ghost King happily, spearing a carrot with the sharp end of his chopsticks.

“Of course I do. What’s not to like about it?”

The god gave him a half-amused, half-exasperated look. “Do you not remember what happened to poor Quan Yizhen?” He popped the carrot into his mouth and chewed thoughtfully.

“Well, it wasn’t your fault that he wasn’t strong enough to handle your food. I, for one, will never ever be sick of, or from, your cooking.”

“Does San Lang promise?” Xie Lian teased. 

“Of course, gege,” was his easy response, and he prepared another bite. “I promise.”

Xie Lian grinned at him and Hua Cheng grinned back, savoring the taste of the strange curry and Xie Lian’s happiness.

❀。• *₊°。 ❀°。

Hua Cheng woke up feeling terribly, horribly, awfully, dreadfully ill.  

He shuddered violently, and Xie Lian shifted in his arms. He froze immediately, then slowly disentangled himself from his sleeping husband, clenching his jaw against the waves of nausea rising up within him. 

When Hua Cheng had stumbled out of the room and down the hall, he slumped against the wall and hugged his stomach, willing himself to stay strong. 

You’re a Supreme Ghost King. You’re over eight hundred years old. You’ve lived through things that were thousands of times worse than this. This is ridiculous. 

He sucked a breath in through aching lungs- then stopped. 

The next thing he knew, he was heaving over the toilet. 

Hua Cheng shivered miserably, silvery pinpricks of sweat rolling down his spine. The bathroom floor was cold, colder than he remembered, and he clenched the sides of the porcelain bowl with a vengeance. 

Another wave of nausea came crashing over him, and he gave in to it, only caring now that his husband didn’t hear him. 

A quiet minute passed, then two. Hua Cheng rose on shaking legs to walk to the sink. He caught sight of his own reflection and shuddered. His gaze averted quickly and he splashed water on his face, trying to rinse the foul taste out of his mouth. 

What on earth was wrong with him?

He’d never before had this kind of reaction to the food that Xie Lian had cooked for him before. He’d prided himself in the way he never flinched, and had grown to thoroughly enjoy the food that was prepared for him with such love. 

Hua Cheng despised this feeling of weakness.

As if on cue, he could feel his stomach churn in rebellion.

It was all he could do to lean over the toilet again, shove his long black hair out of the way, and not make a mess.

❀。• *₊°。 ❀°。

When his vision cleared and his consciousness drifted back into his aching body, Hua Cheng sat up. He rolled his neck, trying to work the stiffness out of it.

Judging by the slant of moonlight shifting through the window, only an hour or two had passed since he’d passed out, slumped against the wall. 

Hua Cheng swiped a hand across his mouth, staring with disgust at the bile that came away on his fingers. He stood slowly, trying his best not to stumble, and washed off in the sink again. 

Silently, he surveyed the bathroom. Despite his best efforts, he’d made a mess, one he’d rather die than leave for his husband to clean up.

Body still wracked with chills and tremors, Hua Cheng fished paper towels and a cleaning spray out from under the sink. He dropped heavily to his knees, ignoring the pain shooting through his stomach, and began to clean.

Tears began to prickle the corner of his eye and he closed his eyes. Self-hatred and confusion gripped him, and he clenched his fists. 

Why would he be having this reaction? Was he really losing his powers? He hated this immensely, hated that he wasn’t strong enough for Xie Lian. 

Hua Cheng disposed of the paper towels with shaking hands. He sat down again beside the toilet, hugging his knees, unable to stop the flow of tears down his face. 

Slow, unsteady breaths filled his lungs, and he clamped his mouth over his sobs. He was exhausted and wanted nothing more than to crawl back into bed with the warmth of his husband tucked in the curve of his body. 

But he still reeked and he would never, ever, ever want Xie Lian to see him like-

“San Lang?” 

Hua Cheng froze, trying not to breathe too loudly, raising his other hand to try to stifle himself. 

It’s not enough, though, and he let out a loud hic that echoes in the bathroom. Hua Cheng glared down at his hands, annoyed at the way his body seemed to be betraying him at every turn. 

“San Lang?” Xie Lian’s voice was closer now, and Hua Cheng tried to sit up straighter. He hated that he’d made him get out of bed. 

“Are you in the bathroom? Seriously, what are you doing in there?” Xie Lian’s voice is teasing and gentle until he flicks the light on. His mouth makes the shape of a soft o, unbound hair flowing freely around his shoulders. Lit by the silver light of the moon and the golden light of the bathroom, he looks beautiful, an untouchable god.

Hua Cheng was, by stark contrast, a complete mess. His hair was tangled and undone, falling in messy snarls around his shoulders. The front of his shirt was wrinkled and half-wet from his attempts to clean it off. His stomach still hurt and he could only imagine how pale his skin was. 

It was mortifying to be seen like this. He tried not to sniffle, reaching up to wipe the tears off his face. 

Xie Lian was quicker, dropping down with his usual grace to cup Hua Cheng’s face with his hands, running his thumbs over his cheeks tenderly. Hua Cheng’s best efforts couldn’t stop the low sob that escaped his lips. He lowered his eyes, embarrassed. 

“What’s wrong, San Lang?” Xie Lian moved closer, forcing Hua Cheng to meet the concern in his ethereal golden eyes. He refuses to speak, closing his lips together tightly. 

But his husband was perceptive, and the pain in his eye and the way one arm was still half-curled around his stomach protectively must’ve given it away. 

“Oh, no.”

Hua Cheng began to cry again, for real this time, and Xie Lian pulled him close. His fingers combed through Hua Cheng’s hair. 

“It’s alright. I’m here now. Oh, San Lang, why didn’t you wake me up? You don’t have to suffer alone.”

Hua Cheng’s instincts took over and, in a moment of physical and mental weakness, he finally reached up and pulled Xie Lian’s body close to his own. He tried not to care about how bad he probably smelled. 

Xie Lian lost his balance with a soft oof, falling forward onto Hua Cheng’s body. He buried his face in Xie Lian’s soft hair, inhaling deeply. The familiar scent of lavender shampoo filled his senses. 

“Will you tell me what happened?” Xie Lian asked Hua Cheng quietly, drawing back slightly to look at him. His voice was steady, and he didn’t pry when Hua Cheng shook his head and pointed to his mouth. 

“Okay. I’ll help you up, is that okay?”

Hua Cheng hated feeling powerless, hated the dizziness that overcame him and pushed him to lean heavily on his husband’s side as they shuffled towards the sink together. “Ge.. ge…” 

But Xie Lian was strong, and Hua Cheng knew that. “It’s alright, San Lang. Come, here’s your toothbrush. You got it? I can help you…”

Five thoroughly humiliating minutes passed by before they were on their bed, having successfully made it out of the stinking bathroom and into their shared room. 

Xie Lian helped Hua Cheng recline his head against their propped-up pillows before he ducked out of the room. He returned with tall glass full nearly to the brim with water. His dependable hands didn’t spill a single drop when they brought the cup to Hua Cheng’s lips, allowing him to drink slowly. 

When he was done, Xie Lian placed the cup on the bedside table before climbing into bed with Hua Cheng. He sat beside him, legs pressed against Hua Cheng’s side when he turned to face him. “Are you alright?”

Hua Cheng managed a nod, still too embarrassed to say much more. He found that he was even more reluctant to tell Xie Lian what happened now that he was out of the bathroom and with his husband.

“San Lang.” Xie Lian’s voice was reprimanding, yet kind. “Tell me what happened. Please?” 

The two locked eyes, golden eyes determined and shining, black eye a swirl of conflicting emotions.

Hua Cheng could never deny his husband of anything he’d asked, however, and he told him the whole story in strung together pieces, trying desperately not to meet his eyes.

Xie Lian’s hand drifted over to cover Hua Cheng’s and he listened attentively, nodding when it was appropriate. When Hua Cheng finished, Xie Lian sat silently, as if contemplating something.

“San Lang, why wouldn’t you wake me up or tell me?”

“It’s… gege, I never get sick from your food and I don’t ever want you to stop cooking for me just because… because of something like this…” he trailed off, then closed his eyes. “And I don’t even know what caused it. I’m always fine and I love that you cook for m-”

“San Lang,” Xie Lian said, his hand squeezing Hua Cheng’s reassuringly. “Have you ever considered that you might just be… allergic to what I made?” Allergies. Hua Cheng’s mouth opened, then closed. It made sense, and he hadn’t even considered it. “Oh.” 

Xie Lian smiled and moved closer, wrapping his arms gingerly around Hua Cheng’s torso and snuggling close. “My poor San Lang. Will you come wake me up if this ever happens?”

Hua Cheng laid his cheek against the top of Xie Lian’s head, nodding. 

“Thank you. Do you want to sleep now? You must be tired.”

“Actually, gege… I’m a bit hungry. Any leftovers?”

Xie Lian looked up to gape at Hua Cheng. He chuckled quietly, turning to pull Xie Lian into his arms. 

“Only joking, gege. Unless…”

His husband bumped the back of his head against the curve of Hua Cheng’s neck teasingly, and Hua Cheng laughed again, already feeling better.

[silentstaresfanficandfanart]

Hear me out

Imagine the Mxtx characters all living in one neighborhood together. modern day au. the format is a sitcom. each episode focuses on a different member of the individual families. theres frequent crossovers. xie lian helps out with the community garden. bing is like, in full malewife mode. qi rong lives in xielian and hua chengs basement . they're pretty sure he kidnapped the kid he's calling his son but the kid says hes better to him than his real dad so they're just *not* adressing it. the kid shows up in season 2. they accept this because it makes him a better person. no ones happy qi rongs such a good cook. he is still a cannibal. this is played entirely for laughs and drama.

a certain grandmaster starts a prank war on the other households but once he finally behaves, someone does an OBSCENELY huge terrible prank that leaves everyone in town *baffled and furious* obvoiusly they think its him. but no it was Xielian he didin't even mean to it just happened. hua cheng knows better but absolutely refuses to let xielian take the blame.

mr cucumber is a redditor and hes mad about it. also theyre all isekaied they definitely have all their actual cannon memories they just got isekaied into the real world and cucumber had to teach them all how to be functional people in the modern world and the first episode is just them arriving, panicing, and bingghe losing it when he's informed in fact, his beloved cucumber, has been here before.

[justaghostingon]

Xie Lian: God of Cooking

A crack au

It all began just before Xie Lian’s third assention.

He was minding his own buisness, cooking himself some dinner over a fire, very pleased to have gained as many ingredients as he has and calling it Heavenly Revelation Soup, when another man shows up out of nowhere

Said man is a disgraced chef who’s stuck on finding a very special original dish for a very dangerous man who’s taken over his whole kingdom

He’s so stressed he hasn’t eaten in days, and has spent the whole of the week searching for rare ingredients. But no luck.

He shares his tale of woo with xie lian, and begs a last meal before he returns to face the music with nothifn to offer

Xie lian tries to talk him out of it, but the man insists. So he reluctantly hands it over

Naturally the man instantly throws it all up

But!

In the seconds it was in his mouth, he recognized a mixing of flavors completely unique! Something no one has tasted in all the land!

He exitedly asks Xie lian for the reciepe, then runs back to the palace to prepare the new meal

And with his mastery of cooking, he actually makes it taste divine.

Xie Lian is honestly shocked

The evil king loves it, and demands the chef tell him how he came up with such a dish, and when he reveals it was inspired by Xie lian’s dish, he insists Xie Lian come forward and prepare it “the original way”

Now Xie Lian tries to warn the king, but he refuses to listen, and honestly he’s bad enough Xie lian doesn’t feel too bad about giving him his cooking

Predictably the food is so terrible it makes the king faint. Unpredictably, the king while fainting, hits his head and falls down dead

The guards scream poison and jump for Xie Lian, but at that very instant he assends for his third time

As a Cooking GOD!

Apparently saving a kingdom with a dish so horrendous is kills evil does that

Feng xin and Mu Qing both faint from shock.

Xie Lian is very embarrassed by this new title, he knows his cooking’s not very good, but from the moment he assends he keeps getting all these prayers for good dishes and cooking inspiration

There’s not a lot of gods for household duties like this okay? Lots of normal people like chefs and cooks have been dying for some representation in heaven that proves their skill is important! Lots of mothers (and fathers) pray for skills to feed their families!

Xie Lian becomes very popular, very quickly, which no one, not even the heavenly emperor, were expectinf.

Xie lian prob feels a bit like an imposter

He tries to prove his terrible skills by giving a dish to a follower, but the follower after eatinf and throwung it up, is suddenly struck by the way he used sweet fruit in a far to salty dish and makes whatever the chinese equivelent of pinapple pizza is

Thus the legend of Xie Lian is that his food is a challenge and a test, if survived will give you great wisdom and cooking skills.

His food is so powerful it can literally purge evil!

Followers can use his dumplings are weapons!!!

Now your probably wondering, what does Hua Cheng thing of all this?

He thinks Gege is finally getting the credit he deserves!

As the one person who can eat Xie Lian’s food and enjoy it, Hua Cheng proudly builds Xie Lian a restaurant right off of puqi shrine, and keeps it running with a healthy amount of ghosts and mortals who owe him.

He wants everyone in the world to taste his gege’s food

He even introduced himself to Xie Lian as not just a rich young master run off, but one with restruant training! Who was looking for a job!

And wouldn’t u know it, your shrine to the cooking god needs a resturuant manager! Isn’t that lucky!

Thus Xie Lian finds himself a popular god, restruant owner, and if that cute ghost who’s declared himself his manager has anything to say about it, a husband too.

[wwxwasright]

the biggest mystery for me in tgcf right now is how xie lian’s cooking skills went from passable to the worst in all three realms (or if his mom’s cooking was so bad that next to it xie lian’s looks decent)

[wuxianxkexing]

Xie Lian really is a menace BUT I thinks it's cool that before it was revealed he intentionally cooks bad to honor his mother that we get the scene (in the show at least, I don't remember if it happened in the books) where he stops Banyue from eating the disaster he made and he cooks her something that is actually good enough to eat. He will really feed crimes against humanity to everyone else, including Hua Cheng, but not Banyue because that is his daughter and she needs to grow big and strong. She probably thinks that everyone else are just super picky eaters because Xie Lian's cooking is actually fine? But she's never had his "real" cooking aside from that very first time and she just thought it was a mistake, not par the course.

Honestly I wish that she didn't spend so much time in that jar (what is she even doing in there? Is it like a Pokeball or something?) and that we got to see more Dad Xie Lian with her. Xie Lian is fucking terrible with all of the other kids (he even makes poor Guzi eat his shitty cooking) but maybe he just always wanted a daughter and that is why he treats Banyue better?

[myheartismadeofstars]

TGCF pokemon teams: made x

Xianle Quartet version

Xie Lian

Absol:

Pretty self explanatory. Absol is the Bad Luck pokemon and appears before disasters. No doubt XL encounters a lot of them. Absol would also keep an eye out for BWX.

Calyrex: a pokemon who used to be a king but has lost everything, even his friends...sound familiar? Also it can make plants grow and I love the unused Flower God!XL concept. Also I think XL deserves a legendary.

Hisuian Liligant: an elegant fighter and a beautiful flower. Revered in ancient times but almost forgotten in the modern era. Also I see H!Liligant as very nice and polite.

Mienshao: an unarmed fighter that fights with "ribbons" that remind me of Ruoye. Mienfoo are also mentioned to seclude themselves in the mountains to train.

Garbodor: our favourite trash collector needed a trash pokemon, okay? But also a joking reference to his terrible cooking lmao. (I think Garbodor could eat XL's cooking like HC can, but that's the same as calling it garbage lmao)

Dusclops: THIS is Ruoye. It wraps and binds people in the cloth bandages hanging off of it. It does hold a Reaper Cloth but XL hasn't been able to find someone to help it evolve.

Liligant, Calyrex and Mienshao have been on the team the longest. I think the newest member is Garbodor, but he has had several other pokemon over his lifetime that he lost due to his luck.

Hua Cheng

Ceruledge: allow me to quote the pokemon Scarlet Dex Entry "The fiery blades on its arms burn fiercely with the lingering resentment of a sword wielder who fell before accomplishing their goal." That's honestly enough for me, but also, wartime!HongHong-Er having a Charcadet and also it's a ghost/fire type lmao.

Inteleon: Inteleon can learn Rain Dance. But also the transition from a bullied kid to an emo teen and finally a cool and suave (seeming) adult who still has signs of being that scared kid at heart?

Houndoom: HC needed a dog. Also the fact that just HEARING Houndoom's howl can send people fleeing in terror and the burns hurting FOREVER. (Reminds me a bit of E-Ming's curse, though not perfect)

Absol: Pokemon believed to cause disasters and hated for it, even though it was innocent and was actually trying to warn them... Also Absol has red eyes! Unlike XL's Absol, HC's has Super Luck!

Honchkrow: Murkrow are supposed to bring bad luck but Honchkrow are the bosses of Murkrow and said to be merciless towards them, much how HC is with Ghost City.

Honedge (Shiny): E-Ming! The shiny form has red eyes on its hilt and the blade seems forged in blood. It's literally a cursed sword with red eyes.

I would say that Inteleon and Ceruledge and MAYBE Honchkrow are the only pokemon he has from when he was alive, though none of them were fully evolved (Inteleon was a Drizzile). Ceruledge evolved first.

Feng Xin

Hisuian Decidueye: hisuian Decidueye is based on a ronin. He's an archer wandering the earth without a master.

Mabostiff: Mabostiff are LITERALLY the Guard dog pokemon!! Of course our favourite bodyguard has to have one! Also supposedly has a "scary face" like our grumpy boy

Lucario: Protective and loyal and I've now seen several people say that FX is good at tracking and I would say Lucario is perfect for trying to track someone (aka: XL) by their aura.

Espeon: Loyal but also the Sun Pokemon! FX is the "Southern Sun" after all! I also have a headcanon about FX having a spoiled cat and I think Espeon is the most similar to the cat I have for him

Zangoose: Obviously a reference to his fighting with Mu Qing. (I also think Zangoose has Toxic Boost rather than Immunity. Because FX isn't immune to MQ's words and actions, just angered by them, ergo: Toxic Boost)

Male Pyroar: It's a noble and intimidating pokemon and I would consider them a very masculine pokemon that would suit his title quite well and also...since it's revealed that Pyroar do have similar social structures to real lions... Males have nothing to do with child rearing I'm so sorry FX I'm sure you'd be a good dad if given the chance idk if I'll give Jian Lan a team but a female Pyroar would definitely be on it.

Most of his teammates have been around for a long time. Decidueye didn't fully evolve until he ascended on his own, and I would say Lucario and Espeon are the newest members. But his "starter" was probably Litleo, and he got Maschiff when he became XL's bodyguard when he was 14.

Mu Qing

Umbreon (Shiny): counterpart to FX'S Espeon, and I think it fits "Enigmatic Truth" almost as well as Espeon suits "Southern Sun". MQ's is shiny mostly because I feel the blue rings suit him better lmao. Also MQ deserves something special dammit!

Seviper: Rivals FX's Zangoose. The poison typing brings to mind his own toxicity (🤟) and the bladed tail reminds me of his Zhanmadao and Seviper is just a bit longer than most Zhanmadao are.

Persian: Considered beautiful and elegant but fickle, just like our boy!

Leavanny: Leavanny reminds me of the fact that his mother was a seamstress. But also: they are kind to children (but can also learn Sword's Dance and have wicked bladed arms) Mama's boy cannot forget her.

Midday Lycanroc: Cautious and extremely loyal to those who treated them well. Considered Dusk Form considering how hot headed MQ is, but slightly prefer the Midday form for him because it emphasizes the loyalty while Dusk is notably difficult to raise I also headcanon him with a yellow coloured dog so midday suits that better

Empoleon: Proud in all evolutions, but still live in groups as Piplup and Empoleon, though solitary as Prinplup. Sounds like pushing people away and then realizing that you wanted them in your life after all.

While he doesn't keep it with him, he also has a Male Indeedee who has been with him since his servant days. He mostly stays in his Palace and manages things. MQ doesn't like to be reminded of those days, but it did introduce him to his friends.

The oldest teammate is Leavanny by quite a bit. Leavanny was with him before he went to Mount Taicang (though maybe not fully evolved) Lycanroc is the newest member, but I don't think Empoleon is fully evolved until he reconciles with XL and FX.