#yeah i'm australian/kiwi

[thetisming]

my one broadway &j criticism. best bro. what happened to mate. what did you do. thats Benvolio, Romeo's best MATE. that's not his bro. they're mates. british. australian. americans why do you do this. what happened to mates

[aroaessidhe]

2022 reads // twitter thread      

A Half-Built Garden

aliens make first contact & offer to help humans evacuate from what they think is a dying earth

but actually human networks are trying to heal from climate change and don’t all want to leave

diplomacy, navigating different cultures, non-anthropomorphic aliens, parenting, family,

queer, trans, jewish

[eissibee]

For anyone needing good news today... this horrible transphobic mouthpiece flew all the way over here (after bothering the Australians) to try to drone her hate here. Kiwis said yeah nah get fucked I reckon.

Apparently she even copped a few eggs. Considering there is a national egg shortage, that makes an even clearer message. I'm sure she will whine about women being silenced, and possibly hoped for this outcome, but it sends a clear message of solidarity to the trans community here. We are with you, and Aotearoa loves you. Don't give in to despair.

[weirdestbooks]

Confessions (Wattpad | Ao3)

America’s father was strange and persistent. Ever since the end of last year, he had been messaging America and the other so-called “favorites,” asking them to meet him at his house so he could tell them something important. America had asked some of his other siblings and niblings if they had gotten the invitation, but none of them had, which just made America more curious as to why Britain wanted all of them to meet up. 

It had taken a while, but they had finally reached the point where they could all show up at his house at the same time.

“Okay, does anyone have any idea of what is happening?” America asked New South Wales, Western Australia, South Australia, Tasmania, Queensland, and Australia who had arrived before he had. New South Wales shook his head.

“Nah, mate. None of us Australians know shit. Have you asked the Canadians? Or the Kiwi?” America nodded, and New South Wales sighed. 

“Why is Grandpa so insistent that we have to be here today at the same time? It's not like he invited any of the other favorites. It’s just some Canadians, some Australians, Kiwi, and you.” South Australia commented, crossing his arms.

“Maybe he has something he wants to tell all of you at once?” Caleb suggested for the thousandth time. Normally, America would tell him that they have nothing in common that would require them to be here simultaneously, but he didn't want to look insane in front of his family.

“You told the world you had DID ages ago. Why does it matter?” James asked, his voice gentle like aways.

“Yeah, they already know. They ain’t gonna think you’re crazy,” Conch Republic added.

Ignoring the fact that James was right, America began to start small talk with his Australian family as they waited for the invited Canadians and New Zealand to show up.

“Hey guys! Have you figured out why Dad is so insistent on us showing up today?” British Columbia, followed by Newfoundland and Labrador, Manitoba, and Northwest Territories, said as he approached them.

“No, we were waiting for the rest of you since Dad was so insistent that we all show up together,” Western Australia said with a small smile.

“He’s been a nuisance about that,” Tasmania said. Australia wrapped his arm around her shoulder.

“The great British Empire, reduced to begging for his former colonies to come and see him, ain't that right, Tassy?” He said.

“What do you mean, ‘former colonies’? If I recall correctly, none of you have left the Commonwealth yet, which means I'm the only true former colony.”

“We get it, America. You have an ego,” New Zealand said from behind them, finally arriving. Some of America’s family members began snickering at that, along with some of the other alters. America rolled his eyes.

“Ha ha, that's so funny. Well, we’re all here now. Let’s see what Dad wants. I hope it’s quick, though, because I have things I need to do,” he said.

“Delly said it's okay if you need to miss his pseudo birthday. He knows you fought to get a different date, and it's not like anyone remembers this is his pseudo birthday anyways.” Molossia commented.

“Like what, inflate your ego some more?” South Australia asked, causing another round of snickering.

“He probably wants to since we are all attacking it. You can’t see how he's trying to say he doesn't have an ego.” Queensland said.

Queensland was, unfortunately, right. America flipped her off and then opened the door to their father’s house. Tasmania had picked the lock while they were making small talk earlier. 

“Grandfather! We are here! Please tell us why you wanted us all here!” New Zealand yelled. 

“In the kitchen! Take off your shoes at the door, especially the Australians!”

“Calling us out specifically, huh, Grandpa?” Queensland asked.

“You are all crazy and spend half your time doing dangerous stunts that will get you killed,” Their father yelled back at her.

“You’re right, but hey!” Australia said, not making any moves to remove his shoes, tracking dirt everywhere. America tried his best to hold down his snickers, as he had also not removed his shoes.

“People said he was basically an American colony during World War Two for a reason,” Caleb commented, prompting a snort of laughter from Eastport. 

Well, pushing aside the fact that America might have semi-adopted his nephew, their group made their way into the kitchen, where England and Britain were arguing in sign language.

“If you guys are going to argue, we can come back later,” Manitoba said, stopping the argument in its tracks.

“Wow, if they had stopped arguing, they must have really wanted us here," Newfoundland and Labrador whispered to Western Australia, who did her best to stifle her giggles.  

“I can hear you,” their father said, his tone lacking amusement.

“Good,” Western Australia shot back. Their father rolled his eyes, and England slunk out of the room, giving their father one last glance.

“What was that about?” Northwest Territories asked. Their father waved his hand dismissively.

“Don’t worry about it, Northwest. That’s something me and England have to work out ourselves. Now, for why I called you here.”

“Finally.” South Australia said, straightening up. Their father exhaled once, looking like he was trying to calm his nerves.

“I’ve been lying to you for a long time.” He said. America snorted as James murmured no shit.

“Yeah, we know you are a liar. But you’ve been getting better at that.” America said.

“Yeah, Uncle Ame is right. You’ve been better at that. If that is all you needed to say, Grandfather, I think you might be disappointed to know we already knew that.” New Zealand added.

“Yes, I knew you were aware of that. But this is more of a secret England wanted me to keep. It’s part of why we were arguing when you came in.” Their father said. America could see several members of the group perk up at that. 

“And you are telling us?” Australia asked.

“Yes…all of you were called ‘favorites’ by many of my former colonies. I know not all of the so-called favorites are here right now, but there’s a reason for that. See, you twelve are the colonies I tried to protect by keeping secrets from you. The fact that you had another parent.”

America froze.

“WHAT?” New South Wales exclaimed, baring his teeth. Their father raised his hands in a gesture of surrender.

“My children, I never wanted to hurt you with this, but I believe you have finally matured into wonderful people who were ready to learn that uncomfortable fact. Rest assured, though, I did this to protect and help you.” His father put a hand on America’s cheek and smiled at him, and America felt sick. He wanted to say something, anything, but he couldn’t. He was frozen in place, shaking legs and a pressure in his throat. He wanted to cry and scream and stop feeling comforted by the hand on his face.

But America just stood there and stared into his father’s eyes, which were empty of regret.

“I did this out of love. It’s what allowed you to be so well-behaved and favorites as well,” he said, pulling his hand back before crossing his arms, looking smug as he did so.

“Dad…please tell me you’re lying…” Manitoba said

“He has to be! My kids are here! If they had other parents, we would know!” New South Wales insisted.

“Hey, yeah, Dad’s right. If we had other parents, we would know. After all, Northwest's kids knew!” Tasmania said. 

“Well, he did. Once upon a time. But he planned to tell you before you were mature enough to understand that. I tried to convince him to back down, but he refused. So I fixed that. As for Northwest, well they chose to stay silent. It was a smart choice on their part. After all, they were always mature.” Britain said. New South Wales collapsed as Queensland and South Australia rushed to catch him, chest heaving as he fought off what looked like a panic attack.

“And yet I wasn’t told about my other parent.” Northwest Territories said quietly. Britain shot him a small smile.

“Well, you didn't need to know that. You just needed to know your place, lest you end up like him,” Britain said, gesturing to New South Wales.

“What did you do to me?” Said the state in a broken tone, clearly hurt by the betrayal. America was too and was half convinced James and Caleb were the only reason they were still standing. As they slowly began fronting, the Conch Republic threatened murder against Britain.

“I just fixed your problems and removed some corruption. I know this might hurt to hear, but I do love you, NSW. That's why I had to hurt you, even though I didn’t want to,” Britain said, his words sounding like empty promises.

But you could hear it in his voice.

“He is actually serious about what he’s saying! He actually believes that what was most likely torture was for some bullshit greater good and actually thinks it helped his son. He’s delusional! I know he abused you despite you being a favorite, but I didn't realize that other favorites were treated worse!” Molossia ranted, anger in his voice.

“I wasn’t abused,” Ameriac said softly, not knowing if it was him trying to convince the clothes or him trying to convince him. America lowered his head to make eye contact with his father. “I wasn’t abused, right?”

“America…” James murmured.

America hated how small and weak his voice sounded. Britain looked offended at America, even suggesting that.

“Of course not!” He said, causing relief to fill America’s body, relief that was quickly replaced by horror as he continued his statement, “I mean, even though you might have known, England used your martial law to fix that, so we wouldn’t have to hurt you, and that way you wouldn’t go running off with the natives and get yourself killed.” 

America’s knees finally gave out, and Australia scrambled to catch them, tears rolling down the Australian’s face. Was he crying for America or his father? America didn’t know. But did he really ever know anything?

Tears were appearing in his eyes, and his breath began to get more and more uneven and shaky.

“America breathe. You have to breathe.” James said.

America…he didn’t think the marital law had affected him that badly. What else did England force him to believe…and to forget?

“What else?” America asked shakily, in a small moment where his breathing evened out.

“What else what?” his father asked, the same fucking smile on his face as if he hadn’t just told America that England mind-controlled him into forgetting he had a mother, mind-controlled him into forgetting so much about himself.

“What else did England do to me?” America snarled out as someone else began co-fronting, helping them stay standing as fury pumped through their veins.

“He just ensured you’d be loyal to the church and the government. It’s no big deal. Honestly, you twelve are being so dramatic. It’s not like you can even talk to your other parents. They’re most likely dead. And if they aren’t, well, I don’t remember who they were. It was useless information. You can find out on your own.”

“But what if they're dead?” Newfoundland and Labrador asked, her arms wrapped tightly across her body.

“Well, I think that’s more your fault than mine. Canada and America were always better at hurting the natives than I was. If you North Americans need someone to blame for the deaths of your family, blame them.” Their father said casually. A loud ringing began in America's ears, and he pulled away, letting whoever was co-fronting take charge.

He had to get away. America needed to get away.

—————————

America was in his bedroom now, in his apartment in Washington. He had left the country world. The ringing in his ears was still present but quieter than it had been before.

“Guys.” America asked softly, “What happened?"

“You started having a panic attack. I know you don’t like anyone seeing them, so James began co-fronting and left the group. You’ve been asleep for a little while since then.” Unorganized Territory explained.

“You also missed Northwest Territories decking Britain!” Molossia exclaimed.

America exhaled a little sigh of relief before smiling slightly at Molossia’s comments, although the smile quickly faded.

“Thanks, James. You’re a lifesaver.” America said before curling up in the fetal position.

“He knows…but are you alright, America?” Caleb asked, his voice gentle

“No. I feel sick and betrayed and…and…I can’t believe…England fucking took advantage of the martial law to like…fucking brainwash me or some shit. Is this even my real personality? How much of me did he change? Why didn’t I fucking notice something was wrong?” America stood up and left the bedroom, pacing around the room as he tried to control his growing anxiety. 

“He couldn't have changed everything. Besides, you’ve grown a lot since then. Any of your real self that was buried can and probably has come back.” Conch Republic pointed out.

“You aren’t as changed as he wants you to think, either. I knew you then, and I know you now. Not everything gone is dead. Besides, we have Yapam still, so it’s still there somewhere,” James added, and America could tell from his tone of voice that he was smiling gently.

America passed by the open door to the bathroom and caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror. He paused and then walked into the room, flicking on the lights as he did so. America was still in his country form, his stars moving around frantically, a sign of his anxiety.

America dropped his country form, letting his human form appear. America looked at himself in the mirror and burst into tears.

How was America so fucking stupid as to not see it before?

Did England use the martial law to ensure that America wouldn't see it until he and Britain wanted him to?             

How did America not see how non-white he was?

And what Britain had said before James began fronting.

America killed his mother.

“He’s a manipulative liar! Why are you trusting him? Why are you blaming England and yourself but not him?” Molossia ranted.

“Because he’s right. I killed my mother. I…I…this is my fault.” America said panic swelling. He couldn’t be here. He couldn’t—

America brought himself back to the country world, in his house, trying his best to block out the others' attempts to make him think he wasn't at fault when he so clearly was.

They were wrong. America was a monster.

[anxious-art-block]

LU Headcanon's Part 4: Bring back the Twiddies

KIWI WIND “How ‘bout get fucked, mate.” “Eh?” “Oh, choice man!” “All good.” “Oh, yeah-nah, not really.” “Slow down, Trev.” “Ugh, that’s grotty!” “No worries, he’ll be right.” “Bloody nora!”

I used Kiwi instead of Australian cause there’s a larger Polynesian population in New Zealand 

But anyway

Sky’s Hylian is based on Korean

Hyrule, Dawn, and Aurora are besties

Hyrule has this huge sketchbook that’s basically a plant encyclopedia without words. It has really detailed pictures he drew of any plant he’s come across starting at age 8 so that he knows which is poisonous, toxic, or deadly and which aren’t

Most of them he learned from experience 

Wild cuts Florian’s hair properly, they walked in on him trying to cut it himself and did so horribly so Wild steps in like “I may be shit at this too but I can at least what I’m doing”

Wind has canonically killed a man and we need to address that more

Also probably could and very much would to do it again 

Age Headcanons (I know they have official age ranges but like I'm ignoring that)

Time: Physically; mid-30s Twilight: 19 going on 20 Warriors: 24 Sky: 21 Hyrule: 17 going on 18 (Ha) Legend: 21 going on 22 Four: 17 Wind: 13 Wild: 18 going on 19

So, this is technically a theory but it also counts as a headcanon so here it is:

My theory on the Chain becoming, well, The Chain

Each Link was pulled through (read: Walked through, thrown, forcefully pulled, etc.) a portal in order of the timeline. This means they were all thrown into Wild’s Hyrule since they’re at the end of said timeline

This also means that some Links were dropped off at the same time, just in different locations, in order it went:

Sky: Gerudo Desert  Four: Goron City (He just kinda sets on fire) Legend, Time, and Wind: The Great Plateau (Time), Lurelin Village (Legend), Zora’s Domain (Wind) Twilight and Hyrule: Hebra Mountains (Twilight), Korok Forest (Hyrule) Warriors: Hyrule Castle

Wild and Hyrule were the first to meet, they were in the Korok Forest when a portal opened above them and dropped Hyrule through it

I just like the idea of the first game Link meeting the most recent game Link

When one meets another, their triforces will glow, and after they’ve (most) all branched off into pairs or groups, their triforce will glow and give a tugging sensation, telling them to follow it essentially, and leads them all to the Spring of Courage

That’s all I got

The Chain goes to Wild’s Zora's domain and meets Sidon for the first time and are like “who in the fuck is that” cause it’s this fucking HUGE shark Zora with this thousand-yard stare and when he sees Wild he turns into this love-sick puppy and they’re all like “??”

Hyrule hates it when any of them insult his era, cause he's someone who fully believes it's not a hopeless world despite it proving time again that it doesn't care for him

Hyrule is the only one who doesn't have a last name, not in a case of has one and just didn't/doesn't know it (read: Time and Wild) he literally just doesn't have one. Any records of his blood family they could find only listed the first names. No surname given

Time and Twi have the same angry face, Twi will just bare more teeth (well duh)

Twilight has to physically stop himself from chasing things that are thrown, but you can see his head and eyes immediately follow whatever it is

Hyrule's hylian is based on Thai

I have a royalty au who wants to hear more about it?

No one?

Oh well gonna talk about it anyway

Legend: Eldest Prince Hyrule: Youngest Prince Warriors: Personal Guard to Prince Legend Wild: Personal Guard to Prince Hyrule Wind: Wanted Pirate Twilight: Head Groom Four: Local Blacksmith Time: Butler Sky: Local Baker/Former Knight

Fable: Eldest Princess/Twin to Prince Legend Aurora: Queen of Calatia Dawn: Youngest Princess of Calatia Artemis: Personal Guard to Princess Fable Florian: Local Apothecary Tetra: Captain of the Ghost Ship/Wanted Pirate Dusk: Royal Librarian Dot: Local Florist Lullaby: Housekeeper Sun: Sky's Wife/Local Baker/Former Priestess

Additional Characters:

Ravio: "Humble" Bard Malon: Time's Wife/Owner of Lon Lon Ranch Hilda: Queen of Lorule/Best Friend to Prince Legend Styla: Princess of Hytopia Impa: Princess Fable's Lady-In-Waiting

If you’re on the discord then u already know a good bit about it but that’s all you’re getting for now :]

alright I'm done

[xclowniex]

Hi! I'm an American Jew (w/ Australian citizenship) looking into doing my Master's at a university in NZ, and I was wondering if it would be okay to ask you some questions about your experience as a Jewish Kiwi in DMs? I'm honestly really clueless about what Jewish life is like in NZ, let alone in specific cities, and it's difficult to find resources talking about contemporary Jewish life instead of just Jewish history in the country.

Yeah! Go ahead! I'm always happy to help!

[chaoticwholesome]

8 and 14 for the ask game!

8. Do you get confused with other nationalities? Which ones and by whom?

Ok so I have an Autism Accent bc i picked up a lot of speech from American TV, so other South Africans, people who are from the same places I am, tend to assume I'm Australian a lot? At least one stranger assumed I was American once even though I wasn't pulling out the rhotic R?? This is compounded by every Aussie or Kiwi friend i have ever had telling me "yeah you just sound normal to me". Assigned Australian at the grocery store.

14. Do you like your country's cinema and/or TV

GO WATCH SUPA TEAM 4 ON NETFLIX NOW!! Go watch the Aau's Song episode of Star Wars Visions, and go watch Kizazi Moto: Generation Fire on Disney+!!! :D

This is a fascinating question bc like. until recently historically South Africa hasn't really produced a lot of its own TV? We have had some shows! Especially soap operas and reality TV! So much reality TV. But like in my field (animation) for example, a lot of South African studios have worked more in service provision for international productions (like local studio BlackGinger doing post production and VFX on some Marvel movies, and now-defunct studio Clockwork Zoo working on individual seasons of established shows (I know people who've worked on Caillou lol)) and a lot of the locally made shows I grew up on were Sesame Street esque puppet shows (Thabang Thabong, Liewe Heksie, Takalani Sesame even) BUUUT we're recently having our place in the sun with a lot of Disney and Netflix deals coming to fruition - see the above shows! Aau's Song contains some of the most gorgeous visuals i've seen in a 3D short, Supa Team 4 follows some Zambian superhero girls with extremely fun snappy animation, and Kizazi Moto is a really fascinating pan-African anthology animation series i have yet to watch but am SALIVATING over. For more animated shorts, also go check out the thesis short films of students at The Animation School, an institution i have no bias towards whatsoever :). Particular standouts are The Sugarcane Man, Don't Drop the Goose, The Other Side, R.I.P, and The Boy and The Robin. Also 'Undone' if you wanna bawl ur eyes out.

For personal taste reasons not a lot of other local TV has excited me this much, but I did used to like local soap opera 7de Laan (7th Avenue) back when it was good and funny lol!

[blubushie]

MAN. Oncemore I've been outdone...Uh, how about 1 + 21 instead!

1: What's the character everyone gets wrong?

I'm the Sheepshagging Piss Pole Sniper Blog, King of Australia himself, and you think I'm not gonna say Sniper? C'mon, mate.

Really though, yeah, it's Sniper. They make him shy too often and there's a difference between being shy and being reclusive. Sniper's reclusive. People also forget how bloody cold he is. Notice how when he saw his former boss and teammate enter his home he didn't stop to ask questions first. The first thing he did was drug them and tie them up with the full intent to torture them for information if necessary. His mantra may include being polite, but he's not necessarily a good man when you have something he wants.

Also notice how stealthily he emerges from the darkness. You know damn well he's memorised every creaky floorboard in that house and knows exactly which ones will and won't make noise when stepped on. Probably approached with a careful heel-toe side-step to make sure his boots met the floorboard in silence and didn't "thump" on contact. An efficient predator. Wonderful detail.

Also you get marks taken off if you call him a Kiwi or say his adoptive parents aren't his "real" parents. His entire character arc is realising that the parents who raised him are his real family, and therefore he's Australian.

21: What's a part of canon you think is overhyped?

Oh, bugger. I don't know actually for overhyped. Underhyped, I'd say Australium. It's so prevalent in the comics but you NEVER hear about it in fan content.

[adventurous-adventures]

January 5 2024

First session of the new year! Let's get into it!

We spent ages just going through out-of-context quotes we had collected from various places.

"SUCK SUCK SUCK SUCK" Mick dying from the sucking. "Maybe not do that to the person who spilt their drink last year.

River Lea and Raven dump Orc corpses at the butcher: "Wait… what is this guys race?" "Oh god, he's not an orc right?"

Did we mention they are naked? The human butcher is hauling naked Orcs to the back of his freezer.

Oop! An opportunity to get more Australi- I mean Orc Meat.

DM.exe is not responding.

Town Master is pretending not to be home to deal with us.

Juniper threatened to break in and enter through the broken window (courtesy of Cryovain)

Yeah the town master hates us now. (I am not surprised)

Bill Neigh the Cowboy Guy!

"Georgie, stop breaking the DM!" I'm on notes today… 👋Hi! Also, I'm making little quips

We now can't stop laughing at saying we're selling Orc meat.

Mr. Wester is a fucking pussy making us do shit while he hides in his broken house.

(Pussy autocorrected to Pussy-cat and I don't know what's funnier)

Bill and his horse having a Flynn Rider and Maximus 'when he looks at me and I look at him' moment.

Bill and Town Master have similar accents.

Looks like the Orcs are Arsonist but in a Minecraft sense.

River Lea is banned from her dead ex's bakery for obvious reasons.

"Firecunt"… can we say cunt on here because we're kiwi? (Lara here, I say yeah. Our blog, we can do what we want)

they exit with a basket full of bread (of different shapes) and a cheese wheel the size of Juniper.

"What's that jerky made out of?" "Beef" "Are you sure about that?"

The butcher is traumatised so much that the DM forgot Juniper and Iphigenia did not come in with that Orc meat.

Debating who will mount what creature together. Enter Alistair with a shipping chart. Dewdrop & Alistair are plotting.

*insert shipping chart here*

Going back to the Farmer's house.

"Say boyfriend! Say boys! Say boyfriend!" Zain, 2024 in relation to getting the DM to refer to Raven in his dialogue to his child.

Juniper is canonically unhinged (slay). She may be a cleric but she will say unhinge shit to get a rise out of each other.

During our second long rest: "Do you want me to roll perception again?" "Ummm." *rolls dice* "Yes." "I don't like those sounds"

A long rest later: BOOM white cow.

"You notice some bodies on the ground" Everyone chants 'let the bodies hit the floor'.

"Oh look! Orc meat." "They are swarming with flies." "… We're not touching those!"

Australian Orcs have returned.

Zain mispronounced Satyr to Satire.

We bonded with the Orcs over Racism. For once violence wasn't the answer.

Iphigenia is going to pull the dead sister card to get the Town Master to agree to get the folks of Phandalin to help rebuild the ghost town for the orcs

In the tune of Do You Wanna Build a Snowman: 🎶Dewdrop, do you wanna fuck an Orc?🎶

Is Alistair a Furry?

Bonus:

Here is Juniper vs the image the DM had in his head when Juniper and Iphigenia returned with bread and cheese

[fictional-worlds-are-exquisite]

apparently these are very kiwi words, i feel like at least SOME of them are said elsewhere SURELY but who knows. thought I’d share it here!!

[rhysdarbyarchive]

2017 interview with Rhys in Shortlist Magazine (source) Transcription under the cut

Comic and trained killer, Flight of the Conchords' Rhys Darby? Present!

Hi Rhys. What you doing?

I'm on top of a palm tree on an island in the South Pacific, trying to get signal. Technology, eh? I'm in Fiji filming the second season of Wrecked - like a comedy version of Lost. I play the character Steve.

Is he from New Zealand?

Of course.

You've finished shooting the new Jumanji with Dwayne Johnson. What's he like?

A very big, busy man. He'd make these little phone videos with me for his Australian friend. I never saw what happened to them. He'd get up at 4am for some big physical regime.

Did you do a workout with him?

I didn't hear any of that. Sorry, I'm now walking the streets of Fiji, trying to get better reception. Something about a meerkat?

No, did you work out with him?

Oh, no. Kevin Hart's very much into his muscles, too - he'd pull on an elastic band between takes. Jack Black wasn't doing much of that. He was just sitting talking to me. He was more my scene.

What's the latest on a Flight of the Conchords film?

It hasn't got past the wouldn't-it-be-great-to-do-it stage. But the dream's still alive. There's certainly been no progress on it, though.

What's your favourite Conchords song?

I'm a big fan of Hiphopopotamus Vs Rhymenoceros.

How does that go?

Well, I'm not going to rap it down the phone. But it goes: 'I'm the Hiphopopotamus, rhymes are falling off the top of oesophagus.' Like that. I can't go past my own rendition, though. Oh God, what's it called? Something about walking...

Leggy Blonde?

Yeah, that's the one. Another one of my favourites is Angels. It's about angels doing it in the clouds. Having sex. I like their more obscure numbers. A true fan.

What do you think band manager Murray Hewitt is up to now?

He's definitely back in New Zealand, probably fired from any cultural position. I think he's on a small goat farm, still managing the Conchords. Let's not forget: they're the fourth most popular novelty folk band in New Zealand.

Post-Conchords, you created and starred in mockumentary series Short Poppies. What's it about?

It's a deep dive into the mindset of New Zealand life. David Farrier, a real journalist, has been tasked with getting under the skin of what it means to be an ordinary New Zealander. We soon find out his budget hasn't stretched far - he only ends up finding people from one town. All played by me.

And are you playing ordinary New Zealand types?

A lot are facets of me. I grew up with three sisters, so it was easy playing an arty-farty fun girl - which I had fun making David uncomfortable with. There's a ufologist, too. I'm into that.

Do you believe in UFOs?

Yeah, I do. I've seen them. Only small ones. They could've just been shooting stars [laughs]. I believe there's alien life out there and the truth will come out soon, in our lifetime. Governments know more than they're willing to tell us.

Role to role, your voice never changes. Will we ever hear you in a non-Kiwi accent?

If they wanted me to. But then if I did a US accent people would go, 'That's weird.' They wouldn't buy it. I'm proud that I can keep this voice.

Sean Connery never changed his, and that worked out for him.

Exactly. And he's my hero. I'm just waiting to play that Russian submarine commander.

What's the biggest misbelief about New Zealand?

That there's little besides sheep and paddocks. In reality, the sheep numbers are down [laughs]. Also, people think New Zealand's part of Australia, when, really, it's very different. We don't have animals that'll kill you. And the ice cream's much better.

You seem to pop up in every New Zealand comedy. Are you contractually obligated to?

No. The irony is, no one pays you in New Zealand. There's no money there. I should stop promoting it.

Where's the most far-flung place you've performed stand-up?

The Falkland Islands. It was desolate. I did a routine to the British Army stuck in a remote base. I did impressions of various machine guns - they liked that.

You spent three years in the New Zealand Army. Is it true you can kill a man with your bare hands in under five seconds?

[Laughs] Yeah. An unarmed combat specialist taught us some moves. Then we all had a go on a dummy. My time was 4.7 seconds. I keep that in my back pocket whenever I'm at the bar: "You might be mocking my accent now, but in 4.7 seconds you're dead, mate!"

[shatteredhourglass]

Hi! What do you love most about Our Flag Means Death? The best aspects of the show. I'm curious. 😊

It'd be great if I had a clever heartfelt answer to that, wouldn't it? Alas. I don't know. I'm not gonna get it all down here, but I'll try;

I am indescribably horny for men in black leather (Ed in that first reveal scene nearly took me out for good.)

Blackbeard's crew is like. They look and feel like my people. Idk. I feel some kind of home in the way they dress too but also just their personalities and who they are (don't look at this one too closely, you've already seen me Izzyposting.)

I am SO americanised. I am so tired of americanising myself for the fandoms I'm in and for my friends (I love y'all, but.) I'm Australian, not a Kiwi, but it's close enough that I feel like I don't have to edit myself as much. Relief.

Frankly I expected another show where the fandom goes "oh they're SO gay" and it was all subtextual. I am so sick of those. It shocked me.

It hits that exact sweet spot of angry/violent/fucked up and funny and romantic that I love and try to write.

*gestures wordlessly at every character except for Calico Jack*

Everyone is queer. Everyone. My god. It's not just a token "yeah we put a gay couple who you never see onscreen so y'all shut up" and there's a startling lack of bigotry about it too. I'm not watching queer trauma. It's not like when I watched TCAOS (regrettably) and spent every second Theo was onscreen with fear/nausea clutching my heart

Their silly little muppet faces (affectionate) make great emojis for my server with @trashkingtater (pay no mind to my unfunny server name)

They all kind of suck. This should not be a good thing. It is. I love them.

I immensely enjoyed making fun of Izzy for the entire show and then accidentally got brainrot over him.

The amount of trans!Izzy content my God it's delicious. And a lot of it is written/drawn by transmasc people, which is fantastic. There's so much that it feels like... it's not just one "oh hey" fic every now and then. It's fuckin' prolific. (and it will be more prolific, he says, slightly threatening)

You can tell I've been in Marvel for a while with this one, but: BODY HAIR! CHEST HAIR! BUTT HAIR! (probably.) People who are not 7-pack musclepads! They are people-shaped.

Yeah there's probably more than this but I'm not very good at thoughtfully translating my emotions nor interpreting them in the first place so I don't know if this is a good answer. Take it anyway.

[leighlim]

Any song can be appealing if interpreted in a specific way. :)

(I'm VERY tempted to look up 'Toot Toot, Chugga Chugga, Big Red Car'....and listen to it)

-

-

-

-

-

I've had my fair share of listening to 'The Wiggles' while babysitting. It wasn't bad...

...but if I had a choice...I definitely would have appreciated the option of this kind of cover!

(Though I'm guessing there's a reason kids like the version specifically written for them....)

PS: No idea which episode this is! You'll have to help me...I'm not even sure it's still up on Ten Play.

PPS: Love the tidbit about yelling 'Wake Up Jeff' at 2 in the morning. Though I understand Jeff Fatt's neighbours wouldn't be laughing if they usually are asleep between 10 PM and 6 AM. :/

PPPS: Transferring all these notables from the DVR has been quite an experience as captions are being done in different colours! So I'm able to catch who is speaking even before they are flashed on screen (or I hear them!). I think it was in one of the 'Have You Been Paying Attention' episode...since the camera wasn't zooming in on the other contestants (plus it didn't help that it was 'spotlight time')...I had no idea who the green captions belonged to. So...I had to go back and find who was linked to green.

Really liking it! Good job caption people! :)))))

(Because usually it'll just be that one colour ---- actually...sometimes when it's one colour....they do say who's speaking....But I think I quite like things colour coded!)

---------------------

HIGHLIGHT:

Dave: Rachel, welcome to the show. What is your problem?

Rachel: Yeah, So my question is: How do you stop yourself from acting like a dickhead in front of really famous people like Naomi Watts?

Becky: It's funny 'cause you seem pretty like, calm talking to us.

[Rachel plays along and smiles]

Rachel: Uh...yeah.

Becky: You know, so many celebrities get cancelled. So, what you've got to think about is this person who you might be getting nervous in front of...Like, I used to get nervous in front of Hughesy and then I just used to think: "Oh, he'll probably be cancelled one day and he'll need be to be his friends."

[Becky laughs uncomfortably. Dave turns back to the screen. Rachel in the meantime is cracking up.]

Becky: You know? So think about the time and the future when they need you.

Dave: Can we just drill down on that for a second?

[Dave gives us a look.]

Dave: Before the show, what did I say to you, Becky? What have you got to tell your friends in your forums?

[Understanding in Becky's eyes]

Becky: That you're cool.

[Dave bursts out laughing along with the audience.]

Dave: Back to you, Rachel. I know that, like, 'Penguin Bloom' was a great film and it's done really well. Did you have a problem with Naomi Watts on set? There was an incident that you got embarrassed about?

Rachel: Yes. Basically, the first time I met her, I called her 'Queen Naomi' and I curtsied.

[Scattered laughter from the audience.]

Kate: Alright, here's the question. When you were making a...

[Kate attempts to sound Kiwi]

Kate: ...a duck of yourself...

[The audience reacts]

Dave: Hang on, that's just Kate Langbroek doing her accent, by the way...

Kate: I'm paying homage. I'm paying homage to Queen Rachel.

[Kate does the 'Namaste Bow']

Dave: How do you feel about Australians doing Kiwi accents, by the way, Rachel? How do you feel about that?

Rachel: How do you feel about us doing you guys?

[Laughter from Dave and the audience]

Dave: I'm quite honoured, to be honest. Alright, So...

Nath: Can I just say: I think you go the opposite. What you need to do when you meet a superstar....is, yeah, go ------- crazy, grovel, be obsessed with them. When I met my queen, Kylie Minogue...

Dave: We've got a photo of you. We've got a photo of Nath Valvo...

[A photo of Nath and Kylie is up on the screen. Both of them smiling. Nath pointing at Kylie's signature on his left forarm.

Nath: ...is I made her sign my arm with a Texta...and then I went and got it tattooed over. And she did...

[Nath shows us the tattoo]

Nath: I mean she was freaked out a little bit and she seemed quite uncomfortable.

[Laughter from the audience]

Becky: Yeah. Get 'Naomi' tattooed on your forehead.

Rachel: I think I'm going to do that. Yeah.

Dave: I have to admit, I know what Rachel's talking about. I met Brad Pitt once and that was the most nervous I've ever been in my life. And I know Eric Bana. So I thought: "Here's the way to connect with Brad Pitt." And I said to Brad Pitt: "Hi Brad. I know Eric Banana."

[Laughter from the panelists and the audience.]

Dave: He looked at me like: "Man, I don't know what you're talking about." So...yeah.

[Rachel adjusts her glasses as her laughter subsides. It was a good anecdote!]

Dave: Who's the most nervous you've ever been in front of, do you reckon, Rachel? I mean you've met some big names.

[Rachel considers this.]

Dave: Anyone in particular who really freaked you out?

[Rachel takes a second.]

Rachel: The only other person that I really acted like a dick in front of was Cate Blanchett. I just yelled at her. I said..

[speaks loudly]

Rachel: "You're fantastic!"

[Laughter from the audience and Rachel just shakes her head and shrugs...still in disbelief why she did it in the first place.]

Rachel: And I think we were in an elevator at the time, so you can imagine.

Dave: Look, the fact is...

Kate: Everybody loves to be loved.

Dave: Yes.

[Kate nods.]

Dave: The fact is, Rachel House is a superstar.

[Rachel reacts to that.]

Dave: And she's going to continue to be a superstar and continue to meet really, really famous people. And she's going to continue to be herself. And I think...

Kate: And one day, people will start yelling at you, Rach.

[Kate does it even louder than Rachel.]

Kate: You're fantastic!!!!

---------------------

[cassiedangerclouds]

Everything Is Green {Krii7y}

DeviantArt: SugarHigh100 (Smii7y)

Twitter: Beaudicea (Kryoz)

~

Trigger Warning!: In this story, I will write about colour blindness. Sorry if I do not get it correct as I myself do not suffer from anything of the sort (I am mildly longsighted). If this may offend you, please don't read. And I would really love to hear from some colour blind people on how I can fix my perception of it up in case I write this type of thing again.

Remember that this is MY interpretation of colour blindness (Protanomaly and Tritanopia), this is how I understood what I read from my research. So please don't take it personally if I get it completely wrong.

In this story, there will also be:

Anxiety Attacks –Based off of the ones I get. Because everyone experiences these differently-

Bullying (mentioned)

Swearing

Self-Deprecating Tendencies

~

Life gets pretty boring when all you see if various shades of green, grey and if you're lucky, violet.

But not the pretty, dark violet everyone else sees. No, it's a dull, kind of light version.

That's just life when your parents are Red-Green and Blue-Yellow colour blind and you pull the short straw on both ends.

No, I couldn't just have one; like not perceiving reds or greens properly. Or maybe become a very rare case and not be able to see blues properly.

No.

I ended up Red-Green in one eye and Blue-Yellow in the other.

So my world is full of dull, warped greens, boring and monotonous blacks and whites, only light grey and maybe, if luck wants to grace me, with violet. I strive for the moments that slightly purply-blue colour pops, I try to capture every detail of the moment so that I can try recreate it.

My parents try to tell me that when I'm older, my eyes may get better.

But I know that they won't.

Magic doesn't exist. If you're born with these things, you live with them forever.

People get weirded out by me. I confuse them. So I learnt to keep to myself. I sit under the trees, on the grass, things that should be blindingly green and are but just a dull blue really.

I got told that my glasses would help me see colours properly, but the kids all picked on me, so I don't wear them anymore.

The glasses were pretty cool I guess, I mean they were blue and red, and the world looked amazing back in fifth grade for the month that I wore them.

It's been five years since I've worn them though, I figured that, if I was picked on in fifth grade, high school would be no saving grace. So they sit in draw at home, collecting dust.

I guess life isn't too bad, I mean, at least I'm not blind. But this is no better.

"Hey. Hey. Can you hear me?" I kept my head down, knowing exactly who it was.

"I asked you a question."

I looked up, not too much, just enough to see if it was who I thought it was, "Yeah. I guess. I'm not deaf." I said, tapping my fingers against the ground.

"I'm not here to pick on you kid. I'm not an arsehole. My friends and I saw you sitting by yourself and I wanted to know if you wanted some company."

This time he caught my full attention, "Like for real? This isn't some big joke that Evan and all that set up to give me hope?" I asked.

He laughed, "Nah dude, honestly, Evan and his friends are a little overrated." He said, "With the exception of like Ryan. Oh and Craig, he hangs out with us sometimes."

I smiled, "I mean, sure. I guess that I could come and sit with you guys." I said.

"Sick." He said, helping me up.

He led me over to a table, not far from where I was sitting, I noticed him stumbling a little.

"Hey fuckers. I'm back." He announced.

"No one gives a fuck John." One of the other males at the table replied, looking up from his phone.

"Fuck you to, bitch." John replied.

"So guys, this is...uh I never asked your name, did I?" John asked.

"Good goin' John. You see a lonely kid, invite him over, but don't even ask his name." another said, this one was for sure in grey.

I snickered a little, looking over the group, of course, looking at everyone wasn't going to help me tell them apart, but it was worth a shot.

"HEY! That sounded a lot better in my head." The grey one stated.

"So, what's your name stranger?" one of the guys closest to me asked.

Come on, just say Jaren. "Lukas." I answer. What the fuck did I say that for?

"Well Lukas. As you could figure out, I'm John. In order around the table from my left. Cameron, Ryan, Craig, Anthony and...where did Crystal go?" John asked for a person I guess was here before he came over to me.

Crazy hair, grey guy, glasses, panda case. I recited in my head, it was the only way I'd actually remember them.

"Brock's nut of a sister came over and requested that her friend join her for a conversation." Anthony, I think, answered.

I frowned, "Cassidy isn't too crazy." I stated, causing everyone to stare at me.

"What. She used to be my..." I trailed off, "Never mind. Why did you invite me over here. I'm just the weird kid."

"We're all weird here." Cameron said, completely ignoring my slip up or at least I hope he did.

"I mean. Probably not. At least compared to me. Nobody is as mutant as I am."  I stated, looking down.

"What. Why? Because your eyes are different a little off centre or your hair is white? Every time I saw you, I always thought you just bleached it, like John does with his." Craig said with a shrug.

I sighed, shaking my head, "Okay. Don't like freak or anything okay John. But like, that jumper you're wearing is probably rad. But it's like literally all green, different shades. But to me. That whole thing is green, except the white bits near your wrists." I always found it was an easy way to explain my problem to people by talking about something that probably wasn't green and trying to tell them that's how I see it. "I can imagine and sort of figure out the colours, because I've done it for so long-"

"What shades of green?" John asked.

I shrugged, "The top is like a lime kind of colour. So it's probably like yellow or somet'in'. Uh, the middle is a dull green. So that's like red or orange, I don't remember because I don't see those colours a lot. The top of the sleeves is like, mint ice cream green. So they're some type of blue." I explained, hoping I got the colours close.

"That's so cool dude." John said.

"How do you live like that? Not being able to see colours. Only green?" Craig asked.

"Well. I mainly see the green spectrum, but I can see light grey, black, white and sometimes, violet. But it's like not the cool dark violet colour, it's more like what I think you would see as a cross between magenta maybe and periwinkle. I can see some shades of yellow, kind of. Most colours appear as greens though." I explained, tapping my fingers against my leg.

"Well, sit down you weird ass human." Cameron said.

I smiled, shaking my head, "Sorry. This was a nice..experience, but I'm just gonna leave." I said, turning around, I walked back towards where I was.

Suddenly I was on the ground, noticeably colder than before.

I looked up and saw my jumper in John's hands.

"Hey, fuck you. Give me my jumper back, it's cold." I demanded, getting off my arse, snatching my jumper out of his hands, slipping it over my head.

"It's a mild fifteen degrees, it's not that cold." Cameron stated.

"Shut up, you Kiwi fuck. We get it that it's fucking freezing in New Zealand." A feminine voice said from behind me.

Cameron pouted, "Piss off you Aussie bitch." He stated.

"Oh, and this is Crystal. Crystal, this is –"

"Hey Luke." Crystal said with a shrug.

"Vibe." I returned, watching as they walked over and sat between Cameron and Ryan.

"Wait- you two know each oth-"

"Whatever, reunions are boring. What did the nut want with you, aye?" Cameron asked, nudging Crystal's shoulder.

Crystal shrugged, "Never say that again. Worst Australian accent ever. Come on Fitzy, you're the closest one to where I'm from and you can't even fake a believable accent." They said.

The group started to banter, giving me the perfect chance to slip away.

I kept walking, not really knowing where I was going, I just knew I had to get away from that group before something bad happened to them because of me.

"Hey. Hey! Lukas, wait up." I heard a call from behind me, recognising John's voice, I picked up my pace, not watching where I was going.

Once more I was on the ground and I noticed that it was because I had bumped into someone. I stood up, "I'm so sorry. I-" my breath hitched.

In front of me stood well known school menace and Evan's right hand man Jonathan.

"I-I'm so so sorry. Uh, Delirious." I said, I could feel myself shaking.

Delirious turned to face me, and I could feel my lungs get heavy.

"Dude. Are you okay?" he asked me, sending me into surprise.

"What?" I managed to squeak out.

"I asked if you were okay? You hit me pretty hard and fell to the floor." Delirious said.

I shrugged, "I'm uh. Fine. Just yeah. Sorry." I stammered, my breathing starting to even out.

"Lukas, why are you-" I heard John stop dead, his boots squeaking as he skidded on the hallway floor. "Fuck."

"Well, if you're okay. Then I'm just gonna walk away." Delirious said, walking away.

I was still shaking, I closed my eyes and took a few deep breaths. In for four, hold for seven, out for eight.

"Dude, are you okay?" I heard John was near me now.

But I still didn't open my eyes, I shakily pointed at my bag, "Pap- Pap- Bag" I started coughing.

"Pap Bag. Pap. Paper Bag! Oh, get the paper out of your bag!" John figured out, quickly flipping the latch on my bag and handing me the almost empty bag.

"I don't understand how this will help you." John said.

I cupped my hand around the opening, placing it near my mouth, breathing in and out into the bag.

My breathing went back to normal after five minutes and the coughing stopped.

I moved it away and drew in a deep breath.

"What the fuck was that?" John asked, making me painfully aware that he was still there.

I opened my eyes to see him standing in front of me, "That was an anxiety attack you fucking idiot. Holy shit. I could've-no-probably would've passed out if you hadn't have helped me. Jesus, I haven't had one that bad in a while." I stated, half talking to myself.

"Your welcome. I mean, I don't know how to respond." John said.

I smiled, "Thank you. But seriously. I thought that Jonathan was a bully. He didn't even threaten me. I think a lot of people just spread rumours and one rumour made it out and became popular saying that the BBS are bullies. They're probably just a bunch of misunderstood kids. I- I'm sorry for walking off." I said.

"Nah dude. My friends can be a little much sometimes, even for me." He said.

"Oh. Okay. Well, I'm still sorry. It was a good thing you did you know, asking me to join you guys. Your friends don't seem to bad. I'd probably fit in with you all. I feel like a big dou-"

I felt something warm against my lips for a split second and then it was gone.

"You talk too much." John stated.

My face started heating up, "What the fuck? We haven't even known each other for a day. John you're fucking weird," I stated, pulling my sleeve over my hand, wiping my mouth.

He laughed, "You enjoyed it. Don't deny it." He said.

Maybe I did. It doesn't matter, I don't even know the guy. "No I didn't." I retorted, but I knew my body language said otherwise.

"You're a bad lyre Lukas. You're red as a firetruck." He teased.

"Shut up you fucking prick." I muttered.

He rolled his eyes, "Come on. Come and hang out with me and my band of Misfits." He said.

I sighed, "Fine." I said and we walked back towards his friends, maybe a bit closer than previously.

But seriously, who the fuck kisses someone they just met? Like what even is that?

"Someone who has a set." John replied.

"Fuck. I said that out loud. Sorry." I said.

He stopped and turned to face me, "Stop fucking apologising. You've done nothing wrong." He said.

And that's when I noticed one small thing, well not really small thing, but it was something that would this was a moment I'd never forget.

~

Everything is green.

But his hair is my favourite colour.

Because it is violet.

~

Authors Note:

Hi guys!

Yes, I am a weirdo. I would've made it John's eyes, except that in this case it wouldn't work because John's eyes are blue and for them to be violet, they'd have to be yellow. Which just isn't realistic.

Anyway, that's it.

[bougainvilea]

Yeah that's true. I could add that in. Plus everyone thinks because of covid unis are gonna be more lenient with grades and the essay sooo hopefully that's the case, fingers crossed! Oh good luck in ur oral exam! Not long left to go👏🏼👍🏼👍🏼 what's critrole?? Also I gotta say I love you Aussies sm!! Ur accents are sooo cool , whenever I do my Australian accent I sound like I'm from new Zealand apparently 🤷🏻‍♀️hehe love ya. Also same, I used 2 hate my name because everyone mispronounced it

I hope that is the case, you’d expect unis to realise that we’re in a bit of a traumatic period rn lmao. One of my lecturers tried to make deadlines really harsh but i spoke to my tutor and was like “listen bud mental health is killing me in quarantine” and he was like “sorry i can’t do anything about that :/” and then 2 days later emailed me saying i had a 4 day extension lmao 

not long to go indeed!!

critrole is critical role, the show i’m watching on youtube!! it’s basically a bunch of really excellent voice actors playing dungeons and dragons, and i’m getting SO heavily into it. each ep is like 3-5 hours and i’m on ep 77!!! it’s really interesting bc it is essentially a tv show or movie or whatever but the mechanics are so different? like, instead of watching the thing happen, you’re watching and listening to people describe it? kinda like a mix between a book and a tv show, but these characters are just so real and i love them and i’m starting to HARDCORE ship one of the pairings fnsjdalkgsj

it’s sweet that u love us aussies, and i can DEFINITELY imagine people trying to do our accent and sounding kiwi, because i witnessed that w one of my favourite youtubers recently jdasklffnj. 

i’m glad u grew to love your name! how do you pronounce it?? 

[a-singleboat]

So this is a lot but 1-100 on the get to me uncomfortably well asks? (I'm genuinely curious)

You asked for it... 

note; some questions I answered no to so I crossed them off to save some space

What is your middle name?

Sabrina

How old are you?

17

When is your birthday?

November 30

What is your zodiac sign?

Sagittarius

What is your favorite color?

Currently, rose gold

What’s your lucky number?

3

Do you have any pets?

No, but I recently went to a cat cafe and I want a cat now. 

Where are you from?

Massachusetts 

How tall are you?

5’3

What shoe size are you?

7 or 7.5, depending on the brand

How many pairs of shoes do you own?

About 10 pairs, give or take. I’m not sure on the actual amount.

What was your last dream about?

My last dream was about me losing my crocs in an airport. I was devastated. 

What talents do you have?

I can sing, dance, write, act, stage manage, and throw a flag pretty well.

Are you psychic in any way?

With my best friend, yes. We think the same way so it’s not that hard to know what she’s thinking. 

Favorite song?

I can give you the last song I listened to which is Location because I don’t have a favorite song at the moment. 

Favorite movie?

The Farewell, which is actually really good for a limited release film.

Who would be your ideal partner?

Celebrity wise? Zendaya

Do you want children?

Maybe one or two, but I feel like I’d end up adopting more than giving birth.

Do you want a church wedding?

Are you religious?

Have you ever been to the hospital?

Not outside of my birth and visits.

Have you ever got in trouble with the law?

No, but funny story. I kicked water onto a man when I was younger and I thought the cops were gonna come for me.

Have you ever met any celebrities?

No, but I saw Sam Smith at London Pride and Chris Evans in a chinese restaurant by where I live.

Baths or showers?

Showers

What color socks are you wearing?

I’m not wearing any, so flesh colored? 

Have you ever been famous?

Not that I know of.

Would you like to be a big celebrity?

Maybe a celebrity in the sense that people have just heard my name. I’m fine living with a few hundred followers to read what I write for now.

What type of music do you like?

I like listening to more musicals and whatever genre Walk the Moon is.

Have you ever been skinny dipping?

Yes, once.

How many pillows do you sleep with?

3

What position do you usually sleep in?

Like on my stomach with one leg hitched up over a pillow. 

How big is your house?

Average sized? It’s the smallest of the three on my street that was built with the exact same layout at the same time. 

What do you typically have for breakfast?

I don’t really eat breakfast but I love honey bunches of oats. 

Have you ever fired a gun?

Have you ever tried archery?

Yes

Favorite clean word?

Origin 

Favorite swear word?

Can it be a string of swear words? Because I like “bitch ass hoe” a lot.

What’s the longest you’ve ever gone without sleep? 

2 days

Do you have any scars? 

Yes, one on my right hand and two on my left leg.

Have you ever had a secret admirer?

I don’t think so, I never really think about if I do either.

Are you a good liar?

I like to think that I am

Are you a good judge of character?

I would say yes because the last two people I met, I felt like we’re horrible and I was right 

Can you do any other accents other than your own?

Do you have a strong accent?

No, but I do have a Boston accent when I’m angry.

What is your favorite accent?

I love British accents or Australian 

What is your personality type?

INFP-T

What is your most expensive piece of clothing?

$35 vintage jacket that I used in a musical and now wear whenever I can. 

Can you curl your tongue?

Yes

Are you an innie or an outie?

innie

Left or right-handed?

Right

Are you scared of spiders?

Sometimes, if I’m not expecting them

Favorite food?

I have a lot of favorites.

Favorite foreign food?

Mayo walnut shrimp 

Are you a clean or messy person?

I want to be clean but I know I’m messy.

Most used phrased?

bitch ass hoe

Most used word?

I actually don’t know, probably “I”

How long does it take for you to get ready?

like 15 minutes 

Do you have much of an ego?

Not really, i don’t like boasting or seeming cocky 

Do you suck or bite lollipops?

suck

Do you talk to yourself?

Yes

Do you sing to yourself?

Yes

Are you a good singer?

I like to think so and my friends also think so

Biggest Fear?

being left alone

Are you a gossip?

depends on the person

Best dramatic movie you’ve seen?

i don’t really watch a lot of dramatic movies

Do you like long or short hair?

short on girls, long on guys but personally, short on myself

Can you name all 50 states of America?

Favorite school subject?

English 

Extrovert or Introvert?

omnivert

Have you ever been scuba diving?

yes

What makes you nervous?

heights and ladybugs

Are you scared of the dark?

yes

Do you correct people when they make mistakes?

sometimes

Are you ticklish?

yes

Have you ever started a rumor?

Have you ever been in a position of authority?

yes

Have you ever drank underage?

technically no, it was legal where i was drinking 

Have you ever done drugs?

Who was your first real crush?

I honestly don’t remember, the last time I had a crush was in middle school and I’m now a high school graduate.

How many piercings do you have?

i have my standard ear piercings

Can you roll your Rs?

How fast can you type?

depends, i can usually type faster if i have the idea running through my head

How fast can you run?

not very

What color is your hair?

currently pink, naturally a really dark brown

What color are your eyes?

dark brown

What are you allergic to?

strawberry banana kiwi smoothies and mosquitoes 

Do you keep a journal?

i used to, i wrote a speech off one of my journal entries which you can find in my masterlist as a dear future me type of thing

What do your parents do?

my mum is a tax project manager and my dad is a mortgage/realtor 

Do you like your age?

yeah, for the most part

What makes you angry?

when people try to argue with me when i know i have my facts down

Do you like your own name?

i used to not like it

Have you already thought of baby names, and if so what are they?

if you find my wattpad, any name i use for an OC is a possibility

Do you want a boy a girl for a child?

both? it really wouldn’t matter

What are your strengths?

i’m really good at staying on track when i have a mission

What are your weaknesses?

i’m really lazy

How did you get your name?

my dad was going to name me and it was originally going to be sabrina annabelle but my mum liked it the other way around

Were your ancestors royalty?

Do you have any scars?

I already answered this so I’ll say my most recent bruise is from my flag pole hitting my forearm. 

Color of your bedspread?

pink, my choice 

Color of your room?

also pink, not my choice